"Commit yourself to silence. Statistically you likely have nothing valuable to say anyway" How did a note from his editor make it into the published book?
@@nejdalej As someone who used to do a bit of freelance editing, I did occasionally give up on a manuscript that was particularly bad- the greatest mercy I could give the poor things was to let them die quietly. Alternatively, Greg just couldn't deal with any criticism so it never hot edited.
The whole “teenagers are slaves owned by their parents” sounds like something I wrote when I was 12 cause my parents forced me to go on a school field trip...
I feel like Gruggle sees everyone in the world as some sort of parent (because of his blatantly overwhelming daddy issues) and anyone that disagrees with him in the slightest is then forcing him to go on that field trip. If you think about his actions through this lense, it makes sense.
kristian dimitrov my absolute favorite part of his like ”I'm a feminist, go ladies” bullshit is that in his next book and I think some in this book he does actually think he's being pro-woman. In that, he makes woman delicate untouchable perfect goddesses that he must protect like the white night he is. Like he doesn't get that's just as sexist as the ”ladies exist to be sexy and fuck me” thing he has going on in this book.
As a CSA survivor, Onision's use of the topic as a cheap tactic to avoid criticism is downright disgusting. Using trauma as an excuse to abuse others is literally a tactic the person who abused me used to use. You have every right to feel angry at the person who took your innocence, but that does not give you the right to victimize others.
I’ve always wondered about why people will use trauma as an excuse to abuse others. Aside from the fact that they want pity. Like, wouldn’t you rather not continue the cycle of abuse? If you’re so traumatized by something, why would you want to force others to endure that same trauma? It makes no sense to me.
@@thequeenofcringe1585 because some people believe it's the only way to relieve that pain. They internalized it and believed it was normal, so now they just treat others that way and refuse to own up to those actions. That's part of why it's so important to give proper, healthy support to abuse survivors. They'll have a better chance to come to terms with it and learn good habits that were never taught to them by their abusers. It helps stop the cycle.
I've actively watched this process happen. I have a really close friend who got married to someone who uses her own past abuse as a crutch. It was genuinely hard watching her abuse and manipulate him and I hope he's able to get out of it at some point. If there is a God, he knows I tried my best. I'm so sorry you experienced that; no one should ever have to. Agreed Greg's use of it as an excuse is disgusting.
I’m not even at the end of the video yet, but I had a feeling this was going to be the “twist”. It’s just the right amount of fucked up to make people shocked, while also trying to justify his actions. Truly disgusting.
I love how constantly he’s like “UgH. Life is so meaningless and valueless.” Then act like the universe centered around him. Like bro, do you matter or not.
No, you see, none of US matter. Gruggles is a GOD AMONGST US LOWLY PLEBEIANS!! Gruggles wants to be super fucking edgy cool but hes too damn narsistic to pull it off.
I feel like it's a combination of narcissism, psychopathy, and solipsism: "I can see only out my own eyes, experience my own experiences, and therefore everyone else is an NPC in my life and I'm the only one who matters, the only person who has achieved true consciousness and sentience. I'm a god among automatons and I'm the only one who understands anything." And because he doesn't have the capacity to experience empathy, sympathy, or even the moral reasoning to think outside himself, he can't grasp the concept that people have internal emotional and intellectual lives that he can't personally experience. So if you don't think or act exactly like him or the way he wants you to think or behave, you are sub human. Which explains the the manipulative behavior, because he manipulates his "NPCs". It explains why he has the emotional maturity of a 12 y/o, because he can't process empathy or moral reasoning that he didn't come up with. He can't, or refuses to, learn from his betters. He has issues with authority, due to that and his shitty father. Which leads to his hatred of other men, of parents, teachers, the military, and religious figures, all of whom probably tried to correct him over the years.
Scary how Greg ties these stories to actual events from his life but always makes sure to include a fictional school shooting. As if he feels thats the missing piece of his life.
look, i'm a lesbian atheist, but when i hear greg talking about religion, it makes me wanna run to the hills and arrive at the nearest catholic church and live out the rest of my life as a nun.
I was a literal edgy atheist kid for a period, and I swear it was seeing people worse than me in that regard that made me feel like an absolute mess of a human being and moving to call myself agnostic. That's the power of edgy idiots
@@doonthefool1607 next? They covered the whole fic. I mean, they did a very very very abridged version for part 3 but they're not making more my immortal videos. Doon really Is confused.
Even though I knew this before, it catches me off guard every time someone mentions it. It's just so incredibly ridiculous, that it was even a joke on The Office.
Zap and have been through severe trauma. In stones to Abigail he literally has sex with her after reading her letter about all the abuse she’d been through
your son is suffering in the back. “mother, I just wanted the three little pigs for my bedtime story. please, end this. I wish not to live any longer after hearing this”
As someone who while in the brooding edgy teen phase of his life only cared about his dead mom and ham sandwiches, I feel shame that I have anything in common with that man.
I love so much that Onision was THAT guy in high school, and is still somehow THAT guy in his 30s. Fascinating arrested development. He should be studied
I know - there was this one guy at my school who, when he was twelve, was exactly like him! The thing is, the guy at my school became a fairly mature, decent person by the time he became an adult - whereas Onision, despite not having been twelve for quite a long time, is still every bit as stupid and immature!
Lucy Towey You are very right. I’m sorry to hear about you going through all this. I hope you’re in a happier environment now, with fewer of THOSE guys in your life and more nice folks and long furbies instead
Rosie Low Our Lord and Savior Lesbian Onion Killer Mother of the Long Furby Commander of Tumblr We live for our QUEEN to chop the onion “Yass Gurl chop those onions” (I sound like I’m in a cult omg I’m not I swear)
teya: "how well do you know greg's bullshit? his favourite thing about her is-" me: "her sad life and arousing arms?" teya: "that she has no opinions that could possibly challenge his worldview in any way" me: oh yeah that too.
You know that that's from a hilarious Harry Potter fanfiction, yeah? It's either the best satire on the planet or the cringiest fanfic on the planet. InsaneReader did a hysterical video summarizing the whole thing. You should go give it a look on his channel!
No one: Actually no one: Greg: iM wEiRd. iM a W E I R D O. i DoNt FiT iN, aNd I dOnT wAnT tO fIt In. HaVe YoU eVeR sEeN mE wItHoUt ThIs StUpId HaT oN? tHaTs W E I R D.
I heard "dead mom" and went "oh he's like J.D. from Heathers" and then "he wants to bomb a sports game" and I was like "oh... He's REALLY like J.D. from Heathers"
I just realized, if Greg dies at the end of the book by being stabbed in the head, how did he write the entry about his fight? And if it was his girlfriend that finished the diary, did she write it in first person through the eyes from him? And she knew exactly what he was thinking about at that exact moment?
I read the book, and turns out Cory wrote the chapter where Greg dies. And she somehow knew his whole thought process. Cuz as Teya pointed out, that's completely normal
*"Commit yourself to silence. Statistically you likely have nothing valuable to say anyway."* Ah, if only that fool would follow his own "advice" to other people
He's using words like "facts", "statisticaly" or "logically" all the time while talking about things you can disagree about to make himself invincible. Like saying "If you smoke weed you could go to prison and logically you wouldn't want to date a criminal, so now I get to chaine you to my basement". Yes, because smoking weed is far worse than chaining people to your basement...
I followed a similar guideline a year ago or two, for reason unrelated. All my friends are better than me anyways, at one way or another. I end up ruined my expression ability.
"He gets absolutely enraged at a woman hes not attracted to insulting his masculinity" Basically the entire premise of Onision's videos of him reacting to your reviews of him lmao. "I wouldn't even date you. I know I said you were an 8.6 before, but now I say zero because you didn't like my books" 😂😂😂
@@chillitheconqueror3567 He rated her photo online without knowing who she was, but wants to do a Nice Guy™ style take-back because he doesn't like her and she doesn't like men 😂 She did the Onision forum "rate me" thing in a video a few years back
Learn the importance of story structure and purpose of what you write above all other. Cor example if I was going to write a movie with Luke Skywalker, I want to use him in a situational reveal that way I can build up anticipation for the character and people will be excited when he finally appears. It has to be a satisfying moment where he does something big so I would start the movie with a big battle. The characters are waiting for Luke to return from a mission when they were ambushed. Their struggle to survive and hold out for Luke to return will be reflected onto the audience. The battle takes a turning point for some reason and the heroes start losing. At their lowest point this is when Luke bursts onto the scene to turn the tables again using the height of his force powers. You can see here that there is an intentional structure to how this movie begins all with the purpose of introducing an important character. There's a reason why the battle starts to turn for the worst and how it wants the audience to relate. Novels are the same way and a good writer understands the purpose of what they write. After that dialogue is very important, being able to write dialogue that sounds realistic. People take a lot of short cuts in how they speak especially at the beginning of their sentence.
As someone who wrote almost onision-style stories when I was around 13, i would now say: allowing the characters to have more depth than big boobs = morally questionable. Understanding that a person has more traits than just being an abuse victim, a violent edgelord, or superficial bitch. But I am sure you already know that haha. Keep going!
i just looked it up and it looks like vegan cheese is just some sort of condensed soy product. it doesn't sound all that bad if i'm honest. it's sure as fuck not cheese though.
So, I know Greg’s dad (who was a Christian pastor) *was* accused of sexual abuse of children. Many times. (Greg claimed he doesn’t have many memories from before age 11, sooo...) So I already assumed *that’s* where this was going immediately. But Greg also said he got into a fight with “a jock” in high school because he was disrupting class (•_•) And He Knocked Part Of Greg’s Tooth Out. *SO A SIGNIFICANT PORTION OF GREG’S 2 BOOKS ARE JUST GREG INSERTING EVENTS FROM HIS LIFE FOR HIS 2 SELF INSERT CHARACTERS* i cannot even rn ugh
Yeah and did you know that the scene where him, his stepmother and father is in the car and his father chokes him because he’s playing music so loud actually happened. There is a documentary about it. Well not about it more about how he treat his ex-girlfriend and that he is a paedophile rapist, who abused her sexually emotionally physically over many many years and she showed up on his TH-cam channel, and he filmed some of it. (Like there are clips of him verbally abusing her and thrown a thing at her while she’s trying to talk to a camera) But the documentary is a little weird, because right after she is explaining what she went through. They are immediately trying to humanise him with the dad literally telling how he abused Greg .
another thing like this happened in where he got angry his parents forced him on a trip away from his girlfriend, and another seem like that happens in a different book of his, I don't think he knows how to write about anything else
greg's honestly probably gonna be like "um... i was actually molested by my father... so... essentially you're making fun of my trauma... that's really insensitive..."
Because hes a piece of shit who cant take even a small amount of criticism keep in mind he also went apeshit on a Patreon follower when she dropped 2 dollars..
"and it's not that i failed at representing that in a interesting, well done story with characters that are real people, of course not, it's your fault, it's a story about ME and the protagonist thinks like ME therefore it's good"
greg’s books are basically “i’m weird. i’m a weirdo. i don’t fit in, and i don’t wanna fit in. have you ever seen me without this stupid hat on? that’s weird.
@Cat Princess 101 without light/sun, no shade. The bigger the shade, the closer the lightsource (read in this case: a miniature sun). Gonna need some hella sunscreen, my brohimian friends :D.
My theory is that 'Stones to Abigail' and this book take place in the same universe or even in the same school. I have little evidence to support this, but I think it makes these books a bit funnier. There are some loose thread connecting the books though it may be just Onion Man's horrible writing skills
My theory is that it is the same school in three different simultaneous dimensions and Arthur, James and Daniel are in their respective ways different versions of Onion Greg but yet entirely unrelated individuals who are just living the same life but with a slight aesthetic and contextual difference that ultimately makes their paths divulge.
If they are in the same school, how weird is it that both James and Arthur have a road trip with their father and stepmother who they hate and then turn on metal music very loudly and they are thrown out of the car and choked by their dad while their stepmom takes their boots off?
the chadcel... a mytical creature that has the mysoginistic nihilism of an incel, but still a chad, because it doesn't exist, because it is wish fulfillment.
How is this written by a 30-something? This is like a teen writing their edgy diary for a therapist they need because they want to make their whole personality Jaoquin Phoenix’s Joker.
Author’s Note: STOP FLAMING PREPZ AND STRANGEAEON FANS!!! Arthur iz nut a self-insert Mary Sue. He’s nut purfect, he’s a nihilist!!!! Fangz to my 10 year-old subscribers 4 the free moneys.
"Why the legitimate f*** is this girl still dating him?" Probably because she figured out that she's the one person he doesn't want to maim and/or murder and she's terrified that he'll change his mind about not hurting her if she breaks up with him.
@@thetravelingspectator4124 such a book would be a rather compelling psychological thriller. Difficult to write properly, sure, but if done right, that would be a goddamn literary classic.
Joining the Air Force cause your dad tried to feed you vegan cheese is the worst situation anyone has ever been through? I’ll tell that to the guy that cried in boot camp cause that was the first time he ever had a hot meal
Unfortunately, this passes the Bechdel test. Because Corey and Rachel (his girlfriend) had a conversation about diets and are both named. It does not, however, pass the Sexy Lamp test. Because you could replace most of the women in this book with a sexy lamp and nothing would change.
See? This is why I don't trust the Bechdel test. So long as two female main characters talk about something that isn't a man ONCE, even the most misogynistic shit can get through. We need to replace it.
@@queen-monarch It was originally created to demonstrate how little representation there is for lesbians in media. The logic went that if women couldn't even have a conversation with another woman that didn't involve a man in its content, how could she ever display attraction or love for a woman? I think it's useful in that context, but there are quite a few other tests that serve much the same function.
@No Name No, it's "a single conversation in the entire story between two women is about something other than a man", not "no conversations between two women is about a man"
A relevant quote from one of "The Simpsons" Treehouse of Horror episodes. It involves a cursed Krusty doll trying to kill Homer in the bathtub. Homer runs through the house, buck naked and screaming, right past Marge and her sisters, one of whom quips: "Well...there went the last traces of my heterosexuality."
Onion boy makes me question my attraction to guys. Because I don’t know if I wanna be attracted to the same gender of that... thing... even though I am a guy.
As a marine veteran with 2 combat deployments my eyes roll out of my head when i hear onion boy talk about the military. Just think about being stuck in a fox hole for a week with this guy.
on the one hand, i want to make a joke that onision wouldn't survive it by "accidental" misfire, but on the other hand i have respect for the discipline i've seen from military personnel.
@@Shrekfromthehitmovieshrek Double that laughter when he can't make it in the chairforce Also a foxhole is a hole in the ground you sit in to avoid getting shot or blown up.
I used to be subscribed to Onision on TH-cam when I was like 12 or 13 and I would religiously watch his videos and think he was *immaculate* And now, a gay 18 year old, I’m just.... *r e g r e t*
Biss I have bear hands and they have thumbs! (Okay they’re the most amazing oven mitts ever and everyone should own a pair so they can all grab hot things with their bear hands. Let me find the link, I want to bless you all! [not spon. I do absolutely love these things bc of the novelty, bc they work so well, and bc I get a kick out of using the pun bc dad jokes are my jam😃🐻🐾] ). Edit: Okay I found them, rejoice you may all have bear hands now! Fred BEAR HANDS Oven Mitts, Set of 2 www.amazon.com/dp/B00I0VULXC/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_gMp1Cb32HB828
I remember people ranting about Mary Sues, but this the hugest (and most uncomfortable) self insert I’ve ever seen. Dear God, why did you make Onision? Please return him immediately, thank you.
The term Mary Sue has become a bit misused, but I’d argue Greg’s characters are the dictionary definition of Mary Sues. Everyone loves them for no reason, and they are supposedly better than everyone. The only difference is, most Mary Sues are made by 12-13 year olds. This man is 30.
I think the best way I heard this book described was "Diary of a Wimpy Kid, but written by a school shooter"
Diary of a wimpy kid: enough is enough
Diary of a Wimpy Kid: The Last Stra.... oh wait that's already a title...
I think it could also be described as "Diary of a Wimpy Kid, but written by Elliot Rodgers."
@@joshuarieder2865 Mumkey Jones actually did that one already. It's literally the Elliot manifesto written in that style.
@@TheBonkleFox I never knew that! Regardless, that is still more interesting than Onision's books, that's for sure!
"She had the mind of an 11 year old."
I think he found that part most attractive.
Can we get an oof
EEEEKKKK
Hey Harald, how is your invasion going?
nice
v e g a n c h e s s e
"Commit yourself to silence. Statistically you likely have nothing valuable to say anyway"
How did a note from his editor make it into the published book?
Tea ☕️
Perfect comment. Everyone pack up, we’re done here.
Wait he had an editor? :P
@@nejdalej As someone who used to do a bit of freelance editing, I did occasionally give up on a manuscript that was particularly bad- the greatest mercy I could give the poor things was to let them die quietly.
Alternatively, Greg just couldn't deal with any criticism so it never hot edited.
And two adverbs in that sentence. Ew.
"Greg has never realized the world is bigger than high school." Well he's never tried dating people out of high school.
nahh💀💀
Damn Falcon, I thought cremations were for dead people.
Me, dialing 911:
"What are you doing?"
Me: Calling the police, I just witnessed a murder.
That's a GOOD one.
You didn’t have to kill him 💀
Onision Logic: Praying to someone is dumb. Preying on someone is dope.
Today on To Catch a Predator “The double standard prayer”
Based
Hey that's a good play on words
This made me smile. Then very sad that someone like him exists.
The fact that this dude made a religion...
The whole “teenagers are slaves owned by their parents” sounds like something I wrote when I was 12 cause my parents forced me to go on a school field trip...
@Noodle Poodle
That phrase inaccurate... Because there are parents who give their kids total freedom, because they can't be bothered to raise them.
DemonicRemption True, but even normal households go through a rebellious teen phase
@@noodlepoodle3582 you just described onion boy's mental age
I feel like Gruggle sees everyone in the world as some sort of parent (because of his blatantly overwhelming daddy issues) and anyone that disagrees with him in the slightest is then forcing him to go on that field trip. If you think about his actions through this lense, it makes sense.
Bro wtf you mean school field trips were the shit.
“Son, it’s dinner time, you must consume the *vegan cheese* “
S A L T Y that could mean several things
WHAT ABOUT THE LENTILS!?
*N O N O T T H E V E G A N C H E E S E*
@literal trash Ah,yes: E n s l a v e d N o u r i s h m e n t
O N I O N C H E E S E
Greg is definetly the kind of person to think that he can turn lesbians straight
He can probably turn gay men straight, that’s pretty close
he turns straight women into lesbians
Of course he can, look at his "BODAAAAAAAYYYY" 🤣🤣🤣 you keep tellin yerself that Greg
Knowing how egotistical Greg is he probably thinks he can
i can
“Mom, I met the greatest girl. She has no opinions and her facial proportions are off the HOOOOOOOK!”
mood
Lol I read "Mom, I met the GREASIEST girl" which also seems fitting.
but hid mom is dead
This had me dead!
That's great son
Here have some lentils
She’s here
She’s queer
Onision’s book brings her to tears
Underrated comment, please heart this, Æons.
Love the idea but "makes her shed a tear" would be better to keep the rhyme ;)
she protec
she attac
but most importantly she read the book
front to bacc
⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐, wonderful comment
Who is she? It's me. And you.
Nobody:
Onision: I BaSeD tHe PROtagoNIst oN My FreInD WhO DIED
This is so sad alexa make me a ham sandwich
Oliver Hilton fucking HITLER how dare you eat HAM
Stefanie Schweigler
Nobody:
Omission: yoU BaSiCaLLy MaDE FuN oF mY DeAd FrIeND!!!
You know it's based on Greg bc he has no friends
Hey when your a fact machine that's too honest, you don't need friends your the only one good enough for yourself 😁
Hates everything? Dead mom? Bombing school events? Trenchcoat? That's not Gregory, that's JD from Heathers
Ladies, if your Greg
> hates everything
> had a dead mom
> bombs school events
> wears a trench coat
That ain’t your Greg!! That’s JD
IMPASTA IMPASTA
Exactly
More like a sad knockoff of JD. The real one would kill him.
“Needs” a girl lol
Lesbian Community: How do you view lesbian relationships?
Greg: In HD.
😂😂😂😂
Basically Onion
*I was gonna like this but it's at a perfect 666 in likes*
@@moonhxney5244 Unfortunately 13 other people seemed to not have the same honorable resolve that you did.
@@danielpreciado3112 sadly
The way onion writes female characters just speaks such volumes about him. It’s so shockingly sexist.
kerry draco no no don’t you know he is a feminist and all for women’s rights
@@kristiandimitrov7066 lol. please tell me you're being sarcastic
visagepale01 yeah I am it’s just to show his blatant hypocrisy
kristian dimitrov my absolute favorite part of his like ”I'm a feminist, go ladies” bullshit is that in his next book and I think some in this book he does actually think he's being pro-woman. In that, he makes woman delicate untouchable perfect goddesses that he must protect like the white night he is.
Like he doesn't get that's just as sexist as the ”ladies exist to be sexy and fuck me” thing he has going on in this book.
The onion is an epic gamet
Actually deceased at "My name is Gregory Dark'ness Dementia Ravenway"
*_“R A P I D L Y C E A S E E X I S T I N G”_*
@@no-man_baugh I can only hope to rapidly cease existing after hearing about Greggy O's more recent "literature"
Enony dark’ness dementia ravenway, god that fanfic is legendary
my immonion
I spat my drink
we've all gotta remember. THIS MAN IS A FATHER. HE IS THIRTY SIX YEARS OLD. imagine being this pressed about high school in your thirties, good lord
@Not Applicable
Then I'm sorry to bring up Machine Gun Kelly...
@@DemonicRemption ah, yes! moral paragon and role model, mashing gun kelly
i genuinely cannot believe he has children. they gotta be fakes or something
Never mind that, imagine GETTING to high school and having everyone know that your dad is onision
@@nellfromhell7192 oh god
Watch he's gonna make a video about how you threatened to murder him with that onion cutting clip
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Don't give him any ideas.
I mean I will give you a high-five if he makes that video
I genuinely believe there's something legitimately wrong with him.
Courage Karnga I think everyone does
I saw a quote somewhere that went something like, 'Onision's books are like a pizza cutter, all edge and no point.'
Oh damn... accurate😂
That's just Onion Boy in general.
wasn’t that from the comments of Krimson Rogue, the other book reviewer, the one with a cute cat named ash, and a lot of little footnotes
I'm crying. Oh my gosh, that is so beautiful
Omg that's sooo deep
"so what are you in for?"
"I killed a man, you?"
"I didn't eat my vegan cheese"
*“ I didn’t consume the abomination of a meal that is the insanity of faux vegan meals”*
*backs away*
lol ok Were you possessed by Gregory for a second? Because damn that was a really good impression.
@@eiad1251 lmfao that's a glorious impression of Gregory
“Oh my! God have mercy on us all!”
As a CSA survivor, Onision's use of the topic as a cheap tactic to avoid criticism is downright disgusting. Using trauma as an excuse to abuse others is literally a tactic the person who abused me used to use. You have every right to feel angry at the person who took your innocence, but that does not give you the right to victimize others.
I’ve always wondered about why people will use trauma as an excuse to abuse others. Aside from the fact that they want pity.
Like, wouldn’t you rather not continue the cycle of abuse? If you’re so traumatized by something, why would you want to force others to endure that same trauma? It makes no sense to me.
@@thequeenofcringe1585 because some people believe it's the only way to relieve that pain. They internalized it and believed it was normal, so now they just treat others that way and refuse to own up to those actions. That's part of why it's so important to give proper, healthy support to abuse survivors. They'll have a better chance to come to terms with it and learn good habits that were never taught to them by their abusers. It helps stop the cycle.
Thank you.
Two wrongs don't make it right
I've actively watched this process happen. I have a really close friend who got married to someone who uses her own past abuse as a crutch. It was genuinely hard watching her abuse and manipulate him and I hope he's able to get out of it at some point. If there is a God, he knows I tried my best.
I'm so sorry you experienced that; no one should ever have to. Agreed Greg's use of it as an excuse is disgusting.
I’m not even at the end of the video yet, but I had a feeling this was going to be the “twist”. It’s just the right amount of fucked up to make people shocked, while also trying to justify his actions. Truly disgusting.
Nobody:
Book Greg: IM NOT FAT. YOU MAY THINK I AM BUT I PROMISE IM A SKINNY LEGEND
Boy slim thick. Skinny legend got me quaking
@@bnewtz7492 YES!!!
"Book Greg" NKFJENCNE
That would be parallel universe version of : You think I'm weak 'cause I'm vegaterian? Well HERE IS MY VEGATERIAN BOOODY!!!
i love your profile picture
I literally can't get over "come to dinner son, its just vegan cheese"
At least it's not lentils now
@@irdiseddere7752 lentils taste good with vegan cheese
“Chubby beta male who believes in god, like a pussy” is my new chosen final form
Frankly, the lentils meme kills me every fucking time holy shit.
This had me crying
I love how constantly he’s like “UgH. Life is so meaningless and valueless.” Then act like the universe centered around him.
Like bro, do you matter or not.
Gotta love that egocentric nihilism
No, you see, none of US matter. Gruggles is a GOD AMONGST US LOWLY PLEBEIANS!! Gruggles wants to be super fucking edgy cool but hes too damn narsistic to pull it off.
I feel like it's a combination of narcissism, psychopathy, and solipsism: "I can see only out my own eyes, experience my own experiences, and therefore everyone else is an NPC in my life and I'm the only one who matters, the only person who has achieved true consciousness and sentience. I'm a god among automatons and I'm the only one who understands anything." And because he doesn't have the capacity to experience empathy, sympathy, or even the moral reasoning to think outside himself, he can't grasp the concept that people have internal emotional and intellectual lives that he can't personally experience. So if you don't think or act exactly like him or the way he wants you to think or behave, you are sub human. Which explains the the manipulative behavior, because he manipulates his "NPCs". It explains why he has the emotional maturity of a 12 y/o, because he can't process empathy or moral reasoning that he didn't come up with. He can't, or refuses to, learn from his betters. He has issues with authority, due to that and his shitty father. Which leads to his hatred of other men, of parents, teachers, the military, and religious figures, all of whom probably tried to correct him over the years.
“Bro, do you matter or not”. ...yes...?
dude he has no life
Scary how Greg ties these stories to actual events from his life but always makes sure to include a fictional school shooting. As if he feels thats the missing piece of his life.
look, i'm a lesbian atheist, but when i hear greg talking about religion, it makes me wanna run to the hills and arrive at the nearest catholic church and live out the rest of my life as a nun.
I imagine most women feel that way around him in General
Honestly same though
Even Sappho wants to become a nun when exposed to this shit.
That's terrifying
Same. Like even as an atheist I find his constant belittlement of religious people is so fucking obnoxious.
I was a literal edgy atheist kid for a period, and I swear it was seeing people worse than me in that regard that made me feel like an absolute mess of a human being and moving to call myself agnostic.
That's the power of edgy idiots
"My name is Gregory Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way!" I CACKLED
don't compare a superior work of fiction to onion
A Gamer For Money I hope this means she’ll join the VA cast for Internet Historian’s next My Immortal video when it happens.
@@doonthefool1607 next? They covered the whole fic. I mean, they did a very very very abridged version for part 3 but they're not making more my immortal videos. Doon really Is confused.
Now I want Internet Historian and Sorrow TV to narrate Gagory's shitty books lmao
James Stark: Ben Edition LET ME DREAM MCDAMMIT
(This was all a joke please don’t steal my Flinstones Vitamins.)
"He's like if an incell managed to touch a boob once and then decided he was the ultimate enlightened chad"
Lost it
I bawled
Basically Onion Man irl
this feels like a self-insert fic for jeff the killer’s lesbophobic twin brother, jake the onion
This is way funnier than it deserves to be.
LMFAOOO
Lmao
Even Jeff the Killer was better written than this!
OH MY GOD😅🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
“There’s a lot to unpack there, but we’re just going to throw away the entire suitcase” my senior quote
I will now incorporate this into my vocabulary
if I remember, I’ll use this too.
I love your pfp LMAO 💞yoongi💞
Okay, you think Arthur is a self-insert, But in his third book, he accidentally calls the main character "Greg" on three separate occasions.
Oh my GOD, seriously? What's the third book?
@@TheJasmine172 it's Reaper's Creek. Some other guy made a pretty good (long) video about it, it's TERRIBLE
Even though I knew this before, it catches me off guard every time someone mentions it. It's just so incredibly ridiculous, that it was even a joke on The Office.
@@fruitygarlic3601 Wait really? What episode lol
Lmao please tell me you're kidding hahah
onion boy only likes girls who don't question anything he says hmmm sounds abusive
Zap and have been through severe trauma. In stones to Abigail he literally has sex with her after reading her letter about all the abuse she’d been through
@@SuperSara924 GET👏THIS👏MAN👏OFF👏TH-cam
your son is suffering in the back. “mother, I just wanted the three little pigs for my bedtime story. please, end this. I wish not to live any longer after hearing this”
Thursday has seen some shit
I keep expecting him to start slithering away gradually as the video progresses
"Buckle up my homosexuals" I feel so validated
as do i
I’m buckled. I don’t know about you guys.
Why can’t I find this pary
Cameron Trivett it’s near the beginning
Ok
Onision:
Us:....
Literally not a soul:....
Onision: IM NOT LIKE OTHER GIRLS
ouchhh i laughed too hard at this
Onion boy: *I AM AN ALPHA MALE*
Us:.....
Not a single soul:.......
Onision: LOOK AT MY *VEGAN* BODY
Friggin Weeb
Itd be funnier if it went
Onion:
Us:
Onion: IM NOT LIKE OTHER GIRLS
WE WUZ AT THE CLUB! STALKING MY OWN SUBS!
If anyone is still confused about what Toxic Masculinity is:
Greg. It's Greg.
++
Greg is toxic, but there's nothing masculine about him.
@@Phillip_JT I love how you manage to both display toxic masculinity yourself and (rightfully) accuse him of it in less than ten words.
@@Phillip_JT usually toxic masculinity isn't masculine at all
@@Doncornuto I love how you manage to completely miss the joke
Not gonna lie “everything sucks except ham sandwiches” is probably the only relatable thing that onions brain has ever produced
As someone who while in the brooding edgy teen phase of his life only cared about his dead mom and ham sandwiches, I feel shame that I have anything in common with that man.
@@thatsanriosoftboy The two things I cane relate about.
*"THE ALPHA MALE SHALL SPREAD HIS SEED"*
_Furby stares coldly into the camera_
Jakob Mallory
**Consume**
@@flamingoa2706 ?
@@beepboop83 lmao it's a joke on the channel
@@xxctsxhtlnxx Oh ok, I got confused XD
Rise my beautiful child and soon the rivers will run red with their blood.
No but legit what am i doing here ;-;
Therapist: long furby isn’t real. It can’t hurt you
Long furby:
But Thursday Plurboynm Boyporridge wouldn't hurt you. Of course that's before it learns how to break people's arms.
long furby really jus sitting there 👁👄👁
Thursday BoyPorridge: We exist. We won’t hurt you.
Brandeline Meyers I just noticed and I’m so mad I did.
Long Furby will protect you from Onion boy.
“Hello friends and Gregory” made me realize the single dislike on this video.
It's now 5. Looks like Shallot is using all his channels for this😂
Now its 6 lol
@@IAmTheMrBones Guess he's using Kai's channel too.
13 now
Now its 14
"This bitch is tiring" has become my go-to way of describing bad literature.
I love so much that Onision was THAT guy in high school, and is still somehow THAT guy in his 30s. Fascinating arrested development. He should be studied
THAT guy almost always ends up staying THAT guy.
I know - there was this one guy at my school who, when he was twelve, was exactly like him! The thing is, the guy at my school became a fairly mature, decent person by the time he became an adult - whereas Onision, despite not having been twelve for quite a long time, is still every bit as stupid and immature!
He's like a train wreck that you can't look away from tbh
TQGainz he’s too uncharismatic to be a sociopath
Lucy Towey You are very right. I’m sorry to hear about you going through all this. I hope you’re in a happier environment now, with fewer of THOSE guys in your life and more nice folks and long furbies instead
“an onion has layers like a lesbian... has many jackets”
- 2019
*looks to my closet*
Oh my word, it makes so much sense.
What if you have no jackets at all does that make you straight?
@@newbornpeach0987 according to Onision (if he ever talks about) yes
stop calling me out, i can't stop buying jackets and i also got my other lesbian friends jackets for their birthdays 🙃🙃
@@moxxiimayhem you can be the jacket lesbian gang
Oh my god it’s the Lesbian Onion Killer, Mother of the Long Furby and Commander of Tumblr
I’m ready for the onion slicing
Rosie Low
Our Lord and Savior
Lesbian Onion Killer
Mother of the Long Furby
Commander of Tumblr
We live for our QUEEN to chop the onion
“Yass Gurl chop those onions”
(I sound like I’m in a cult omg I’m not I swear)
Nerdbox 1037
I’ll join ur cult it sounds p awesome
longer furby
There's a longer furby on Tik Tok.
@@Vexarax first time around? yeah that's her, and she's really entertaining. Hope you enjoy, even if it's for this one video
teya: "how well do you know greg's bullshit? his favourite thing about her is-"
me: "her sad life and arousing arms?"
teya: "that she has no opinions that could possibly challenge his worldview in any way"
me: oh yeah that too.
tbh i was expecting it to be arousing arms too
I audibly said trauma. I still think that stands but oh well
I thought he meant trauma
I immediately said boobs and depression but that works too ig lmaoo
I was like “Her giant breasts!!”, but was sadly wrong 😔😔
"my name is gregory darkness demetia raven way"
this is
pure gold
You know that that's from a hilarious Harry Potter fanfiction, yeah? It's either the best satire on the planet or the cringiest fanfic on the planet. InsaneReader did a hysterical video summarizing the whole thing. You should go give it a look on his channel!
Tam it sounded very “Anne of Green Gables” when she said that. I loved it!
G Carter the internet historian also read the whole thing. That version is hilarious
internet historian made a really great 3 part video on this and it was the best thing ive ever binge watched
i knew this would be the first comment right away lol
looking really damn attractive while cutting an onion? weird flex but okay
Gurm - Personally, if someone can look this beautiful cutting onions, you’re winning. xD
Legitimately though
OH MY GOD YOURE SO FUCKING RIGHT
Weird flex best flex
I was just gonna comment this
I'm on my knees PRAYING for you to complete this Unholy Trinity
Do you think her sanity can actually withstand the horrible writing abyss that is Reaper's Creek?
Please don’t have her subject herself to the rape scene
Ms. Tinput have you seen krimsion rogues 2 videos, daaaaaaaaaaamn
@@Eagledude131 woah woah woah, slowdown... What!!??
atomicgirl awesomes i said what I said and I wish it wasn’t true as well
As a vegan, I was absolutely devastated when Greg ate steak, I cry myself to sleep every night because he ate meat
Good
@@tiggyvolts9076sooooo sarcams is lost on ya, isnt it
No one:
Actually no one:
Greg: iM wEiRd. iM a W E I R D O. i DoNt FiT iN, aNd I dOnT wAnT tO fIt In. HaVe YoU eVeR sEeN mE wItHoUt ThIs StUpId HaT oN? tHaTs W E I R D.
what’s that from?
an awful thing called Riverdale
Y'know the very iconic and wholesome Archie comics? They made a gritty, poorly-thought-out-drama-fueled show based on it.
OH GOD NO NOT RIVERDALE HAHHSHADHFAS
@VietnameseGirl98 I thought you said "we live in a society, darling"
“My name is Gregory Darkness Dementia Raven Way” ohmygod abbsnfnsnxn
That should be the name of the main character of Greg's next book, provided he writes again!
XXxxAlphaGregofdarknessxxXX
I thought the exact same thing!!
Lmaooo🤣
He sullies the good name of G. Way.
*look, Gerard Way is the only person allowed to be named G. Way for legal reasons*
Onision isn’t even a gamer, how could he be oppressed?
you.
*i like you.*
Ugh. I know this meme is problematic...but it’s still hysterical.
@@anonamouse2780 You said "problematic" unironicly, I can not take you seriously.
@@anonamouse2780 Meme?
Classix It’s an old Gamergate meme: “Gamers are the most oppressed minority.”
Greg really did unlessh his freaky breedy kink on all of us and tried to pretend it made him an intellectual
I heard "dead mom" and went "oh he's like J.D. from Heathers" and then "he wants to bomb a sports game" and I was like "oh... He's REALLY like J.D. from Heathers"
Yes exactly😂
I also immediately thought of Lydia Deetz from Beetlejuice😂
And he's wearing a trench coat.
The only difference is that heathers clearly establishes that jd is a bad guy
don't insult JD
Onision didn't outgrow his "this is not a phase, mom. This is the real me" phase
Because it wasn’t a phase
It was really who he was.
@@imperielgenecist1317 **shaking chills**
it really was the real him.
One of the few times the man was correct.
I guess it really want a faze he really is just a shitty person
"My name is Gregory Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way"
The way that you laughed was so light and precious!
Oh you just love to watch the world burn-
Tara Gillespie and the entirety of “My Immortal” is a national treasure lol
Mcgewgler Tims onisions books are my immortal sequels, we’ve just been to blind to see it
kozumechi but at least My Immortal was at least so bad it was hilarious to read. These books are the literary equivalent of water boarding.
FreedomHero4 yeah these are funny bad but they get to a point where it’s a bit too.......... real lmao
I just realized, if Greg dies at the end of the book by being stabbed in the head, how did he write the entry about his fight? And if it was his girlfriend that finished the diary, did she write it in first person through the eyes from him? And she knew exactly what he was thinking about at that exact moment?
Ghost Greg
I read the book, and turns out Cory wrote the chapter where Greg dies. And she somehow knew his whole thought process. Cuz as Teya pointed out, that's completely normal
Probably bc Greg is a predictable caricature
*"Commit yourself to silence. Statistically you likely have nothing valuable to say anyway."*
Ah, if only that fool would follow his own "advice" to other people
*_-advice-_*
I like how he uses the word "statistically" to give the illusion that he has any idea what he's talking about
He's using words like "facts", "statisticaly" or "logically" all the time while talking about things you can disagree about to make himself invincible. Like saying "If you smoke weed you could go to prison and logically you wouldn't want to date a criminal, so now I get to chaine you to my basement". Yes, because smoking weed is far worse than chaining people to your basement...
@@sallyr8384 I think it funny that he asked for weed brownies but loses when Billy does weed
I followed a similar guideline a year ago or two, for reason unrelated. All my friends are better than me anyways, at one way or another.
I end up ruined my expression ability.
Yeah, Ashley has no opinions but does she have *arousing arms* ?
And a sad life !
@@SirChubbyBunny 😂😂😂😂💀💀
@@vintagedaydream262 You're laughing because it's true.
SirChubbyBunny if this was the 1800s he would have murdered every woman who rejected him
@@emiliew5553 He'd do that in any time period.
"bUCKLE UP MY HOMOSEXUALS"
You are my favorite TH-camr.
Buckled up and ready to strut
Aeon, please make this into merch or something!!!!
This could be your intro phrase XD also make it a seat belt cover
can i still buckle up even if i'm straight
@@soilology I hope so
"He gets absolutely enraged at a woman hes not attracted to insulting his masculinity"
Basically the entire premise of Onision's videos of him reacting to your reviews of him lmao.
"I wouldn't even date you. I know I said you were an 8.6 before, but now I say zero because you didn't like my books"
😂😂😂
Wait he said that???
@@chillitheconqueror3567 He rated her photo online without knowing who she was, but wants to do a Nice Guy™ style take-back because he doesn't like her and she doesn't like men 😂 She did the Onision forum "rate me" thing in a video a few years back
As a wannabe author, I'm very grateful that Onion boy has written these books. So I know exactly what not to do.
Learn the importance of story structure and purpose of what you write above all other. Cor example if I was going to write a movie with Luke Skywalker, I want to use him in a situational reveal that way I can build up anticipation for the character and people will be excited when he finally appears. It has to be a satisfying moment where he does something big so I would start the movie with a big battle. The characters are waiting for Luke to return from a mission when they were ambushed. Their struggle to survive and hold out for Luke to return will be reflected onto the audience. The battle takes a turning point for some reason and the heroes start losing. At their lowest point this is when Luke bursts onto the scene to turn the tables again using the height of his force powers. You can see here that there is an intentional structure to how this movie begins all with the purpose of introducing an important character. There's a reason why the battle starts to turn for the worst and how it wants the audience to relate. Novels are the same way and a good writer understands the purpose of what they write. After that dialogue is very important, being able to write dialogue that sounds realistic. People take a lot of short cuts in how they speak especially at the beginning of their sentence.
@@AmazingKevinWClark Thank you, that's really helpful!
@@emma.no.stop. Your welcome.
same, as a person who wants to possibly do writing, this is a great help
As someone who wrote almost onision-style stories when I was around 13, i would now say: allowing the characters to have more depth than big boobs = morally questionable. Understanding that a person has more traits than just being an abuse victim, a violent edgelord, or superficial bitch.
But I am sure you already know that haha. Keep going!
Greg be like: "She ruined my dream journal! >:( "
🤣😂
Oh my god i love you
LXXXVIII crying
LXXXVIII WHEEZE
I KNOW EVERYTHING, AND YOU KNOW NOTHING. AT THE END OF THE DAY, BOTH OF YOU GO TO THE PRINCIPAL'S OFFICE.
WITH YOUR PARENTS.
‘all the guys according to him are “running from something”.
YOU ARE RUNNING FROM *VEGAN CHEESE*
emo phan trash vegan cheese... the real plague of humanity 😔
Gruggle's absolute lack of any self awareness is completely awe-inspiring.
This is my favourite comment on a TH-cam video ever.
i just looked it up and it looks like vegan cheese is just some sort of condensed soy product. it doesn't sound all that bad if i'm honest.
it's sure as fuck not cheese though.
He's also running from Chris Hansen atm
So, I know Greg’s dad (who was a Christian pastor) *was* accused of sexual abuse of children. Many times. (Greg claimed he doesn’t have many memories from before age 11, sooo...)
So I already assumed *that’s* where this was going immediately.
But Greg also said he got into a fight with “a jock” in high school because he was disrupting class (•_•) And He Knocked Part Of Greg’s Tooth Out.
*SO A SIGNIFICANT PORTION OF GREG’S 2 BOOKS ARE JUST GREG INSERTING EVENTS FROM HIS LIFE FOR HIS 2 SELF INSERT CHARACTERS* i cannot even rn ugh
It gets worse when you learn that Arthur beats up the jock in school and loses a tooth
Yeah and did you know that the scene where him, his stepmother and father is in the car and his father chokes him because he’s playing music so loud actually happened.
There is a documentary about it. Well not about it more about how he treat his ex-girlfriend and that he is a paedophile rapist, who abused her sexually emotionally physically over many many years and she showed up on his TH-cam channel, and he filmed some of it. (Like there are clips of him verbally abusing her and thrown a thing at her while she’s trying to talk to a camera)
But the documentary is a little weird, because right after she is explaining what she went through. They are immediately trying to humanise him with the dad literally telling how he abused Greg .
another thing like this happened in where he got angry his parents forced him on a trip away from his girlfriend, and another seem like that happens in a different book of his, I don't think he knows how to write about anything else
I kept getting distracted by your beautiful son in the background, an excellent long boi, you must be proud
The stuffed snake?
@@ChaChaChaddio Thursday is not a snake, he is closer related to a Caterpillar.
Chad Niggle how dare you insult long furby by calling him a snake
I need one of those horrifying things lol
My profile picture finally has a purpose
greg's honestly probably gonna be like "um... i was actually molested by my father... so... essentially you're making fun of my trauma... that's really insensitive..."
Because hes a piece of shit who cant take even a small amount of criticism keep in mind he also went apeshit on a Patreon follower when she dropped 2 dollars..
eat ass skate fast i hope he makes a response although he did say hes gonna stop putting his "personality" on youtube anymore
@@fantomzhone4365 lmao are you talking about readytoglare? cause that shit was wild 💀💀
"and it's not that i failed at representing that in a interesting, well done story with characters that are real people, of course not, it's your fault, it's a story about ME and the protagonist thinks like ME therefore it's good"
Shit that's a good impression
I fell asleep listening to this and got rudely awakened by ‘MY BODY DEMANDS THAT I SPREAD MY MAN SEED’. I almost died 😂
ᗰ ᗩ ᑎ Տ ᗴ ᗴ ᗪ
That sentence just beams with neck beard energy
I was cleaning my house and this was playing on my speaker, my neighbours may have definitely heard that
Disbelief, fakenews sleep isn't real
@@padtixx5441 lmao
greg’s books are basically “i’m weird. i’m a weirdo. i don’t fit in, and i don’t wanna fit in. have you ever seen me without this stupid hat on? that’s weird.
He's a creep he's a weirdo
@@janjanbinks1710 what the hell is he doing here?
"He hates the English language itself."
As evidenced by his books.
Edit: most likes I've ever gotten on a comment. Thanks, fam.
Tbh the english language is sorta dumb. But hey, lets try and fix it, by removing ONION BOY
Uff, no amount of sunscreen can protect one from this much shade.
@Cat Princess 101 without light/sun, no shade. The bigger the shade, the closer the lightsource (read in this case: a miniature sun). Gonna need some hella sunscreen, my brohimian friends :D.
Gonna need several blankets to keep warm here
@@siriusPuwu Statistically, Onion Boy has nothing of value to say anyway.
Such a big alpha male, he can't even deal with Chris Hansen knocking on his door. lmfao
“He was harassing me :(((((((“ he was peering through the window on the door lmao
*the man breathes, the onion weeps*
I can't imagine being the 911 operator... "Oh, so the man that runs *To Catch A Predator* is at your door?..."
And then when he sued him, he sued the wrong Chris Hansen.
@@avacatherine5646 Icon 😌💅
SHE IS BACK
THE WOMAN
THE LEGEND
cutting onions
I ｌｏｖｅ it
THATS EXACTLY WHAT I SAID WHEN I SAW THE NOTIFICATION OMGF SJDJDJJD
Jesus those are some big onions too
*YEAH! CUT THOSE ONIONS BABY!*
Velma is back
Our lord!
My theory is that 'Stones to Abigail' and this book take place in the same universe or even in the same school. I have little evidence to support this, but I think it makes these books a bit funnier. There are some loose thread connecting the books though it may be just Onion Man's horrible writing skills
Yeah, I'm pretty sure both of the schools have history teachers named mr Hanson, which is pretty ironic all things considered
Both schools had that school shooting
My theory is that it is the same school in three different simultaneous dimensions and Arthur, James and Daniel are in their respective ways different versions of Onion Greg but yet entirely unrelated individuals who are just living the same life but with a slight aesthetic and contextual difference that ultimately makes their paths divulge.
@@sourwitch2340 They're alternate timelines in the GCU (Greg Cinematic Universe)
If they are in the same school, how weird is it that both James and Arthur have a road trip with their father and stepmother who they hate and then turn on metal music very loudly and they are thrown out of the car and choked by their dad while their stepmom takes their boots off?
Also take a shot everytime Greg uses the harassment and abuse of women to create a heroic moment for his character and continue the plot line.
I'd rather not get alcohol poisoning
If I wanted to kill myself, I'd talk to Greg in person
shit I can't afford that much alcohol, or water
Im drunk and not even on half of this video yet ~.~
That will kill some people
"Buckle-up, my homosexuals" is now my favorite phrase of 2019
Strap up, and strap on, muh gays.
"giddy up yall homosexuals yee yee" as texans would say
I kinda took it as “homosexuals” as an umbrella term, but “queers” is kinda the new umbrella term so fair point! 🤷♂️
Jack Pribble eXCuSe ME,as an asexual,I do not appreciate this.
Noor Azraq I’m genuinely curious, is the word Queer inclusive of people who identify as Asexual, or is there a different overarching term?
In his third book the protagonist’s name ACTIVELY changes to greg every couple pages and it made me want to die
To be fair it's not like nobody knew they're shitty self insert fics.
For real?!
shiiit. I hope she does a video on that one, it sounds like a treat
@@SilentSiri wait whAT???
Chloe Kemp OoooOOOo
"My parents wanted me to grow up to be straight, and look how that turned out" is still one of the greatest lines I've ever heard
“Greg hasn’t realized the world is bigger than high school” ya he especially hasn’t figured that out in relation to his love life lol
N/A N/A hello?
Madison Livesay Hi Madison
Calisto Yew why do people keep saying hi to me? I literally don’t know you??
Madison Livesay just being polite!
Calisto Yew idk y’all pls stop making me think I’m being stalked 😭
That feel when you touch a girl's hip and an emo-chadcel rips your eye out.
Big oof moment when he rips the other one out too so you stab him in the back if the head
the chadcel... a mytical creature that has the mysoginistic nihilism of an incel, but still a chad, because it doesn't exist, because it is wish fulfillment.
@@rotciv1486 Mgtow comes the closest to being the fictitious chadcels. Kinda falls flat at the last minute, but it's close enough.
lesbian/bi women solidarity is BOTH of us getting fetishized by onion man at the same time
Most accurate thing I’ve ever read
Daym, I felt that
Oh man I wish this wasn't true oof
Hai le sbianca
Solidarityyyy
How is this written by a 30-something? This is like a teen writing their edgy diary for a therapist they need because they want to make their whole personality Jaoquin Phoenix’s Joker.
Long Furby is sitting in the back listening to this terrible story. I want to cover his ears to protect him.
Sad longer furby didn't do anything to deserve such a fate.
Thursday is a god among men, this will not harm him
Thursday is plotting to eat the onion, do not worry for he enjoys eating them
he has already seen too much, he is beyond saving at this point. we must sacrifice him to the gods to regain balance
@@void6254 We cannot sacrifice him to the gods, for he is God.
The world is bigger than high school, just not his dating pool.
Rayce Archer and i- OOP
Oof
SCREAM
That's disturbingly true.
this only becomes more true as time goes on
Me:Mom can we have Joker?
Mom: We have Joker at home
Joker at home:
MuffinTopProductions This gave me a genuine belly laugh.
Gotta repeat that about 5 more cycles to get to the shitty joker that is onision
*we live in a society-*
hahahaha fk
*I'm tha Jokuh baybee*
"Love transcends diets" is really the progressive forward-thinking mindset we need going into the new decade, good job onion man
When you said "My name is Gregory Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way" I had the largest laugh-fest while simultaneously suffering from war flashbacks.
Edgy edgy edgy
That story was satire, right?
@@whywhy8324 no one knows for sure
Author’s Note: STOP FLAMING PREPZ AND STRANGEAEON FANS!!! Arthur iz nut a self-insert Mary Sue. He’s nut purfect, he’s a nihilist!!!! Fangz to my 10 year-old subscribers 4 the free moneys.
She suffered through Onion-man's books for our pleasure.
Truly, she is lesbian Jesus
Holy fuck, this is great
I might just be a religious man
Danica Jekic
*The Holy Lesbian Trinity*
Lesbian God: Ruby Rose
Lesbian Jesus: Hayley Kiyoko
Lesbian Holy Spirit: Strange Aeons
Implying Jesus wasn't a lesbian.
@@primroseprom Finally someone verbalized it!!!!
We pay our tribute through 6 midrolls.
"Why the legitimate f*** is this girl still dating him?" Probably because she figured out that she's the one person he doesn't want to maim and/or murder and she's terrified that he'll change his mind about not hurting her if she breaks up with him.
Florence B Ah. Intimate partner abuse portrayed in a favorable light. As if you needed any more proof that this was written by Onion Boy.
Oof, too real
I wanna read that book instead
@@thetravelingspectator4124 such a book would be a rather compelling psychological thriller. Difficult to write properly, sure, but if done right, that would be a goddamn literary classic.
#WhyIStayed...
Joining the Air Force cause your dad tried to feed you vegan cheese is the worst situation anyone has ever been through? I’ll tell that to the guy that cried in boot camp cause that was the first time he ever had a hot meal
Unfortunately, this passes the Bechdel test. Because Corey and Rachel (his girlfriend) had a conversation about diets and are both named. It does not, however, pass the Sexy Lamp test. Because you could replace most of the women in this book with a sexy lamp and nothing would change.
I inexplicably love the thought of replacing Corey and Rachel with two Ikea lamps. Thank you.
See? This is why I don't trust the Bechdel test. So long as two female main characters talk about something that isn't a man ONCE, even the most misogynistic shit can get through. We need to replace it.
@@queen-monarch It was originally created to demonstrate how little representation there is for lesbians in media. The logic went that if women couldn't even have a conversation with another woman that didn't involve a man in its content, how could she ever display attraction or love for a woman? I think it's useful in that context, but there are quite a few other tests that serve much the same function.
@No Name No, it's "a single conversation in the entire story between two women is about something other than a man", not "no conversations between two women is about a man"
*Bill Wurtz flashbacks* hELLO SEXY LAMP-
*onion man just further reassures the fact i’m a lesbian*
Big same.
Constant mood
A relevant quote from one of "The Simpsons" Treehouse of Horror episodes. It involves a cursed Krusty doll trying to kill Homer in the bathtub. Homer runs through the house, buck naked and screaming, right past Marge and her sisters, one of whom quips:
"Well...there went the last traces of my heterosexuality."
Onion boy makes me question my attraction to guys. Because I don’t know if I wanna be attracted to the same gender of that... thing... even though I am a guy.
Same
The fact that he published the book on September 11th makes it the second world tragedy that happened on that day
Y'know he was probably trying to prove something. Just like the rest of the story, it doesn't.
That's such subtle, underlying, hidden edgy bullshit. It would almost be impressive if it wasnt so fucking pathetic.
I looked this up to double check that it's true and I haven't stopped internally screaming ever since
What was the first?
Mr. White probably the first book
I think the most impressive trait you have is cutting onions without getting red eyed. Wow.
I was like "how are they cutting onions and not crying???"
Summary of this video: Ah, what I wouldn't give to be Jared, 19
the fact that someone referenced this vine in 2020 in such a way makes me so genuinely happy
GOLD
Whaddup, I’m Jared, 19, and i never fuckin learned how to read
Definitely one of my top 10 favorite comments on yt videos
@@SkareyDrawsStuff tell me what number one is please
Also I mean I’ll bring up that if you were abused it doesn’t give you a free pass to MURDER OTHER PEOPLE
GalaxyOfInk it’s like what people say with being mentally ill, mental illness is not an excuse for being an asshole.
The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo would like to know your location.
As a marine veteran with 2 combat deployments my eyes roll out of my head when i hear onion boy talk about the military.
Just think about being stuck in a fox hole for a week with this guy.
He left for the dumbest reason as well...shame.
on the one hand, i want to make a joke that onision wouldn't survive it by "accidental" misfire, but on the other hand i have respect for the discipline i've seen from military personnel.
heartrate0 he was part of the airforce all they never see the people he kills
Also what’s a foxhole
@@Shrekfromthehitmovieshrek Double that laughter when he can't make it in the chairforce
Also a foxhole is a hole in the ground you sit in to avoid getting shot or blown up.
heartrate0 thank you for your service, sir or ma’am
I used to be subscribed to Onision on TH-cam when I was like 12 or 13 and I would religiously watch his videos and think he was *immaculate*
And now, a gay 18 year old, I’m just....
*r e g r e t*
Same, except I was like 16 I think? I've watched his videos for a few years actually😅
Now I'm a 25 year old bi girl and I feel you.
@@Justinya0 so relieved i can say i cant relate, i was like 9 when i heard of him and hated him instantly
It's okay to have shit taste as a kid 😅
I'm so glad I wasn't on the English side of TH-cam
Impressive that Greg has managed to live all his life with bear hands. I mean, no opposable thumbs? You gotta give him credit for that.
Best comment here.
Biss I have bear hands and they have thumbs!
(Okay they’re the most amazing oven mitts ever and everyone should own a pair so they can all grab hot things with their bear hands. Let me find the link, I want to bless you all! [not spon. I do absolutely love these things bc of the novelty, bc they work so well, and bc I get a kick out of using the pun bc dad jokes are my jam😃🐻🐾] ).
Edit: Okay I found them, rejoice you may all have bear hands now!
Fred BEAR HANDS Oven Mitts, Set of 2 www.amazon.com/dp/B00I0VULXC/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_gMp1Cb32HB828
the long furby in the back: 👁👄👁
his name is Thursday and he is a valid, beautiful part of teya's room
"I'm going to teach my son that soon too..."
Me:chilling vibing
You: makes me read this
Me: " *EWWWWWWW* "
@@psychotickitten4380 excuse you
Psychotic Kitten Thursday is VALID
you deserve military discounts for your service. thank you comrade
autumntee85 you’re implying onision got past bootcamp lmao
autumntee85 onion boy had no medals, he was discharged and is a disgrace to the Air Force.
Robert Hernandez holy crap
Onion boy: "I'm a big alpha boi cause I was in The Military™"
Also Onion: was only in what is referred to by the other branches as the "chairforce"
I was the 1k like yay
I remember people ranting about Mary Sues, but this the hugest (and most uncomfortable) self insert I’ve ever seen. Dear God, why did you make Onision? Please return him immediately, thank you.
God was busy that day, sooo Satan decided to do something but he has absolutely no idea what he did and made Greg...
@@rivahoukes1554 they have since teamed up and are desperately trying to catch him before things get even worse.
@@elenafriese891 I mean, they are trying to catch the unholy abomination know as onion so good luck to them
The term Mary Sue has become a bit misused, but I’d argue Greg’s characters are the dictionary definition of Mary Sues. Everyone loves them for no reason, and they are supposedly better than everyone. The only difference is, most Mary Sues are made by 12-13 year olds. This man is 30.