27 Nasty Ways Narcissists Try to Rule the Roost
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 13 ก.ค. 2024
- Some Hijackals are subtle, some are sneaky. All are to keep your relationship in chaos, preferably with you giving in to their whims, demands, and expectations. Most of all, they want to be in charge and in control of all the things. Be informed. See them for what and who they are.
They are always wanting to create a fracas, a commotion, an upset, and a mess. When you can see what they're up to, it's easier to see their ploys, tricks, and defaults. Then you an choose your responses in healthier ways.
HIGHLIGHTS OF THIS EPISODE:
- Hijackals, narcissists, anti-socials: all need to win and be right
- 27 mean ways they try to keep things chaotic, emotionally
- Hijackals love a fracas, a noisy disturbance or quarrel, about anything
- Do everything in your power to avoid responding with reactive abuse
00:00 Ways Hijackals create chaos; watch for signs.
08:06 Overcoming control, resisting manipulative behavior, asserting independence.
10:43 Prevent fights, identify chaos, say no.
19:56 Respect boundaries to shape desired behaviors.
24:42 Questioning the importance of obedience in relationships.
30:29 Controlling behavior causing problems in relationships.
35:54 Being difficult and causing trouble repeatedly.
39:37 Living with a Hijackal creates constant unrest.
44:55 Avoid reactive abuse; stay physically active, detached.
52:53 The importance of recognizing emotions.
56:36 Feeling like a bad parent.
01:00:37 Dealing with adult narcissistic child's challenging behavior.
01:07:22 Support and conversation for those affected by abuse
* * Remember, narcissists and other toxic people come in all genders and ages * *
and toxic relationships can be at home, at work, at play... with your parent, boss, spouse, sibling, friend, co-worker.
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I am Dr. Rhoberta Shaler, The Relationship Help Doctor.
Are you in relationship with a Hijackal? That's someone who consistently puts you down, love-bombs and gaslights you, creates confusion and chaos, and causes you to second-guess yourself? I can help you recognize, understand, and make decisions about those kinds of narcissistic behavior…and especially, how to keep yourself (and your children) safe and sane.
No worries about where in the world you live. I work through private, secure video conferencing. So, we can certainly work together to figure a few things out.
CONNECT WITH ME:
Website: www.EmergingEmpowered.com
Podcast: www.SaveYourSanityPodcast.com
EE Community: www.JoinInToday.com
Subscribe to Newsletter: www.hijackalhelp.com
Blog: www.narcissismblog.com
Facebook: / hijackals
Twitter: @RhobertaShaler
LinkedIn: / rhobertashaler
Instagram: @DrRhobertaShaler
Pinterest: @RhobertaShaler
TH-cam: / forrelationshiphelp
Get my free ebook at www.Hijackals.com
Take my free checklists: www.forrelationshiphelp.com/c...
Are you looking for relief from the pain, confusion and drama of toxic relationships? I can help.
You can reclaim your personal power. Keep watching my videos on TH-cam to find strategies for changing your relationship dynamics.. When you're ready, let's talk.
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TO TALK, ASK QUESTIONS, GET EXPERT ANSWERS & SUPPORT?
Join my Emerging Empowered Community, online:
www.JoinInToday.com
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Explore my eCourses to build your confidence in dealing with narcissistic people.
for-relationship-help.thinkif...
#boundaries #Hijackals #toxicpeople #narcissists #difficultpeople #emotionalabuse #verbalabuse #stoptoleratingabuse #toxicrelationships #manipulation #walkingoneggshells #mentalhealth #emotionalhealth #narcissisticabuse #personalitydisorder
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Optimize Life Now LLC & Rhoberta Shaler, PhD makes no representations about the suitability of the content of this site for any purpose. All content is provided “as is” without any warranty of any kind. - บันเทิง
Hi Dr Shaler
Im sending you prayers for your recovery please rest and take care of yourself God bless you ❤
You look pretty sick. Hugs!! Prayer for your health!!
“The tragedy of life is not death, but what dies inside of us while we live.” ( if you let them destroy your heart)
God bless you Dr. Shaler. Wishing you a speedy and complete recovery.
What happened that she needs oxygen? What a lovely generous soul she is. You can feel it from her.
All the energy you give us , bless you and make your better thank you for all you do for us xx
Thank you Dr. Shaler for your vocabulary lessons of wisdom and growth. My mother is a monster who has taught my two daughters to hate me and is working on my grandchildren to destroy me. I am experiencing the worst evil I have ever encountered in my life. Thank you again for your validating talks, God bless you.
When possible, No contact & complete Detachment is the only form of pain relief that works. I long to forget , and only look to the future to build a new life. I hope u are ok. They don’t change. When u feel up to it pls share more. ❤❤🌸❤❤🌸❤❤🌸❤❤🌸❤❤
This has to be incredibly hard for you. I'm so sorry you're going through this. Be strong in the Lord Jesus Christ. He Loves you always.
I send you my Love as well.
Thank you Janet and Robin. Yes, this is very difficult.To have my own children used as weapons to cut me to the core is more than devastating. I don’t have a word that matches the hurt I feel. After multiple breakdowns, I retreated to a cabin in the woods of Alaska attempting to accept that no one wants me, I really must be bad, and I’m safest alone. Last year this time I broke my leg and found life even harder. Seven feet of snow fell here and well, need I say more. These videos have helped me to see that I’m not crazy but am the scapegoat. Unfortunately, I am stuck in my head. I want to live but don’t know how. Thank you for listening.
@@user-zt4fu8pq6qI understand and you have my empathy. I'm the scapegoat and yes, these evil monsters cause all kind of sabotage and pure hell for everyone, even those in other roles of the family. These videos are life savers, because they equip you with KNOWLEDGE. Patrick Teahan is another good TH-camr specializing in scapegoats.
@@user-zt4fu8pq6q
Oh boy do I understand what you have written here
sweetheart, you need to rest! Ithurts me to see you like this :(
Lord of lords, king of kings. Please forgive this woman as she forgives the ones that sin against her. And Lord please heal this woman completely so she can continue helping us, your children.
Amen
Really hope you get well soon xx best wishes
I am so Thankful for your commitment even in illness to share with us your knowledge to help us navigate these people. Please know my heart loves u dearly for this and wishing u the most bountiful holiday. Yes these people are a mess .. your work helps me see through them. ❤
Ah! Such a sweet Dr! Still Trying to Treat others even when you are not feeling well! God bless your self Sacrificing heart!❤️🙏🙏🙏
Best Wishes to get well soon! The world needs you now more than ever. ❤
Hope you feel much better. You are such a wise and lovely woman. Thank you sharing.
And hurts me to see such a beautiful person I'll , God bless you x
Im grateful to learn this information. It helps to not blame oneself for the outrageous behavior of another person. Tiptoeing around and hiding when that person wakes up. Better not even say good morning as they leave! Thank you for encouraging words and knowledge.
When you don’t react and then the HJ claims and pins on you “being moody.” Then, to not react to that. Gets kind of squirmy for the other when you don’t eat what they dish out. Then, when they are persistent like a boxer jumping around the ring with dukes up and you just stand still.
God's blessings to you Dr Shaler💕🙏
Bless ur heart for making vids for us when u don't feel well 🙏♥️♥️
Get well soon. Please take care of yourself. My prayers and wishes for you to get better.
Thank you for teaching us under such conditions. Get well soon ❤
Oh! Love your wisdom and your ministry to the world! I was so lost and you helped me so much! Thank you so much!
Prayers for your recovery. Thank you for this video. It is so good to know that we aren't imagining this. My 30 year old daughter who still lives with me is all 27 points. It breaks my heart to see she acts completely the opposite with her bf she sees once a week. If they are ever 24 7 it will be a nightmare for both of them. I am checking out all your other videos.
A few other great ppl are Dr. Ramani (renowned narc expert), Dr. geo. Simon (clear & succinct) , Dr. Les Carter (very warm) Dr. Todd Grande (super analytical) & lawyer Lisa Romano. All have their own wonderful styles.
Great informational topic!! Wishing you well and thank you for all that you do for this community. It is greatly appreciated!!!
❤️💙♥️💜 Get Well Soon.❤❤❤❤❤
Thank you for your service ... you have worked exhaustively to inform us, educate us, remind us and remind us again -- seeking patiently and persistently to break thru the deeply entrenched coping strategies and defenses that will or would or did keep us blinded to the truth of the circumstances in which we find ourselves.
Thank you.
I am grateful to have found you and your channel.
Thank you for that brilliant list. Dr.
Thank you for your videos. They have helped me a lot in dealing with my ex-wife and her flying monkeys.
Thank you 🌟💕🌸
Yes please do a video about how they use spirituality against people. Thank you
Dear me, hope you are better, it's important to hear you clear and good, hope your breath and voice are better this days, you have important think to tell us all.
They don't share well. What's theirs is theirs and what's yours is theirs.
They feel they own you in general. 🥺
Very helpful Info. Best to individuate all the way around. Bowenian concepts helped me so much. Also, Maggie Scarf’s Intimate Worlds: Life Inside the Family. Helps understand triangulation and projection, when stress spills from one person to an unsuspecting other. What your program helps with is how to be more discriminating/suspecting so you protect your energy and not become affected by dysfunctional relationship patterns. I’m keeping your healing in mind. Get well soon.
You react badly because you have been letting them have their way. Stop letting them say and do nasty things to you and get away with it. Yes, the relationship will eventually end because of this but these hijackals don’t deserve you.
I really appreciate you putting out these videos but I kind of feel listening to this like you really need to rest. It's okay for you to not release a video for a while and take care of yourself
I'd be interested in a talk about spiritual abuse. It seems to be spreading in the world again - Afghan women and girls, Iran was a much more egalitarian society before 1979, in this country with evangelicals and FLDS polygamous sects.
Oh sweet Rhoberta, Please know I personally send to you my deepest love and gratitude & healing energies on angels wings, I wish so much I could share my breath with you right now, bringing fresh air for you, a puff of wind that you can breath in deeply, not. Just to use to share your messages of encouragement for us, just a breath for you to keep, fresh air to help you.., it makes me so so so sad to see you struggling like this, ( my late mum struggled with breath, & was in oxygen so it brings a real sence of. Compassion from me tk you, I know this only to well, & I have a deep wish, which is I wish I could help especially when I know you’ve spent your lifetime using your precious breath to share with us your incredible wisdom via your healing videos & Your great words to help those of us who are caught up in emotional turmoil, you still are trying to assist us in understanding and strengthening us to be able to deal with what we are going through. Bless you. Bless you 💜
Dear Lady, I’ve not long found your channel but already I’m grateful for each & every single breath you’ve shared with us and very single word, you’ve been easy to understand and make great sense to us as we walk the minefield of the Highjackles. I wish I could reach through the screen and pop my arms around you Giving you a gentle warm hug right now.
I see your so poorly , my heart hurts for you it really does but I see how strong you are…your amazing! . I feel pretty helpless though, I want to help you breath, I know u can’t, but what I can promise you though is , I will follow your advice, I will watch all your videos, I will heal my wounds, I will walk tall for me & for you !!
I will set new boundaries and if I have to walk away from those who cannot accept my boundaries, I will !!!
I will Speak my truths and thanks to your teachings & I will do it with the wind you’ve put behind my sails, you’ve taught me my truth is as valid as anyone’s truth, I won’t play small anymore, so that I won’t be walked over , Or blown over or abused, please know it’s you who’ve given so many of us that strength to make a better tomorrow.
From the depths of my confusion your advise has strengthened me, I have spoken to my Gp and I’m on the right course to full healing, THANK YOU.
Now please Roberta, I wonder if it would be easier for you to write to us? Or maybe you write the info and have a good friend or nurse read for you to us? I know you will continue to help us until you can’t, because you are an earth angel, You show us great strength… and we must use the tools you give us.. and we will. I know it makes you happy to share with us, and I’m grateful for what breath you’ve mustered for us today and always, . Thank you.
Please take care of yourself now though,..
your podcasts and all you’ve recorded and shared for us is a great help and a wonderful resource we can continue to use as it resonates with us all.
So much love
Healing and wellness, always 🥰
Amanda from UK x
💜💚🧡❤️🩵💛💙🩷
I’m so sorry you’re going through this. I got better with Medical Medium by Anthony William. It might not be too late to heal. It’s free to try, just pay for fruits and vegetables and some supplements. His books are at most libraries and podcasts and blog are free. I know how bad it sucks to not breathe. It might take a couple years to get past the halfway point. Maybe sooner. This is the only thing I found so far that makes sense and works.
Does anyone know what her illness is?
I hope it wasn’t the shots. She was such a lovely lady.
Yes- spiritual abuse is horrible... Accepting bad sick behavior under the name of Jesus???? Helping victums hang on???? NOT GOOD!
I feel so concerned by your illness, I am too afraid for you. What is the matter?
Long term Covid?
I was just going to ask that…and ask about the “ you know what”
Let’s all send her healing.
Just look upon her and see her as she looks before being sick. Keep that
I tire in your heart and send her a long hug…hold that hug position until you yourself let go a sigh of relief.
Oh yes…and when hugging…hold on until the person you are hugging breathes a sigh of relief. And also hug on the opposite side we’ve been taught to.
I increases their vibration and yours.
❤❤❤
My heart goes out to you, you take the time even though your poorly to help others, sending you love ❤️
U look really sick. Hope u are better by now. Pls consider redoing the videos where you are not well. For those who have synesthesia it’s impossible to watch.