Why Is My Ex Silent?
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 13 ก.พ. 2020
- In this video, Coach Lee explains why your ex is silent after breaking up with you.
If your ex isn't contacting you after breaking up with you and you are wondering what that means, Coach Lee details several reasons why your ex is not reaching out.
Get more information on Coach Lee's Emergency Breakup Kit at myexbackcoach.com/emergency-b...
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One minute I'm fine and the next I feel like I got punched in the gut.
That sounds typical. Watch my video on Limerence at m.th-cam.com/video/uxtDBgc9Dws/w-d-xo.html to understand the withdrawal that you are going through.
@@RealCoachLee little confused about your comment. Neither on of us is in a relationship.
You feel the withdrawal from Limerence. That’s why it’s so difficult. That doesn’t mean you don’t love her, but it explains some of the pain. I hope you watched the video all the way through.
Oh I see what you mean now. I had to go back and watch it again.
Literally same. Just when i thought i was doing better it all came crashing down this week
Im tired with the never ending cycle of okay and not okay.
For real that's real talk
Yes that is never stopping
Sometimes I Just can't get my head around that she broke up even though I know and understand why.
me too. im only on day 5 of NC and it's been really hard. How's your progress?
wow 118 likes lol. Im still 7 months post break up of my 3 and a half year relationship and 2 years of living together.
Im still in that cycle 😂 sometimes im okay, sometimes im not, dreams about her and flashbacks are coming back even though I dont think about her or doing something to keep me busy memories would just keep on popping up in my head.
She texted a week ago but its nonsense (a statement intended to not be replied to) she was just giving me an info of something thats its not worth replying as per advice of the dating guy and the love chat as to not go for breadcrumbs plus I dont have credits to be able to reply to her (since im not using my phone for texts cause I technically dont have to text anyone, we have the internet for messenger 😂, only for youtube) and dont want to waste money to reply to a text that I know I wont get a reply back so its not worth replying to.
@@angel-pp5gj who are you asking ?
Honestly I wonder how many people would be stalking their ex, Suicidal or on depressive meds if not for this man. I think Coach Lee saves a lot of lives
This is so true
I blocked my ex. Best decision I ever made. It was only then I was able to start healing. Before, it was a constant roller coaster of emotions, set off whenever I saw his face on social media, so any progress I had made in getting over him had been set back.
I'm on buproprion. Cause of my ex. Almost hung myself early dec
@@percytwatwinkle3431 oh God PLEASE don't
That’s me. I’m actually wanted to commit suicide, but I’m here cuz of this man. And I’m fine :)
Don't let someone tell you twice they don't want you
Ehhh, made that mistake.
@ArnelV same here made that mistake too. But that’s where I cut it off and I won’t let them waste my time a third time.
@@baggergurl16 Right on 🤘🏻
Julie, WAY TO GO, GIRL!! 👍
Facts.
My kings and Queens, don't stalk your exes profiles, shit's gonna hurt
I stalked me ex Facebook and she deleted all our photos. :-( your right it hurts. I'm gonna take break from Facebook from now on.
Black Vortex it’s been 2 months and my ex still has a picture of us on her FB and still follows me on IG. Sometimes I wish she had unfollowed me and did all the typical post break up stuff when everything was fresh. If she blocks me sometime down the line I’m sure it’ll reopen some wounds.
Couch Lee. What do you do when my ex new girlfriend reached out to me on fb to throw my ex under the bus. Apparently, they broke up for a week or so, so she reached out to me. Please help!! I don't know if someone of you had experienced this before, but that was a surprise for me. I got caught up in a conversation with her on messenger. I was trying to bring a little light to someone I thought was hurting, but all she did was opening my old wounds, just to let me know, that she went back to him! How stupid I am thinking that she was hurting 😢
It does if you not string enough emotionally
Try having their picture randomly pop up on a dating app and knowing that they are very attractive and are definitely talking to other people. That's pain.
Give them something only you can give, your absence
Cy Colburn
Love This! 👍
Munar Esen
How do you mean your ex loves your silence? What is she doing to love it so much?
Munar Esen
You’re doing well to be rid of her. 👍
@Munar Esen For now...then she will miss you... Coach Lee knows what he is talking about. You are showing confidence by ignoring her.
Cy Colburn yesss !!!
“YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU HAVE UNTIL IT IS GONE!”
It'll never cease to amaze me how easily some people can ruthlessly remove someone who loves them from their lives.
Drew, it's sad, but it happens a lot! People who have been together for years have lost attraction to the other, and it is hard when one is so much in love, and the other fades. Take care of yourself, and don't ever give up on love. ❤️💙
Easy to understand. Welcome to females. Concentrate on your self betterment.
Hurt people… hurt people.
I am at the point of falling into the void of darkness... normally I never get depression but when I met my exgf, we naturally clicked, she said I was her type and we called each other soulmates. When we are together time flies unnoticed. Even our dearest friends supported our relationship and thought it was cute and cool. No one opposed, not even our parents.
I never had depression, but once she left me six weeks ago and a week after she started dating a new guy she met on Facebook, I have struggled with my Faith in God, and have had depressive thoughts of losing her forever. It got so bad, I actually got sick for a day or two and that has never happened to me before.
In the past year and a half, my life has looked like the Book of Job in the Bible. I have felt I am being tested on my faith, I have lost friends, a few betrayed me, and lost my soulmate. Everything feels wrong...😢
Please pray for me, been in no contact. Thanks
It @@FurryLove215it sure sounds like you went through a type of borderline narcissistic relationship AND behaviors. Stay Educated AND Dedicated...💪
The main thing to remember is that we cannot read their minds. We may be feeling like it is hopeless and that they are extremely happy, whilst in reality they may be minutes away from breaking and reaching out
Thank you for this reminder! I have been struggling with this exact thing every day... My ego is screaming at me terrible things about what she thinks or feels about me. I honestly don't know that no contact will work in my case, she said after 1 year together that she wasn't ready for commitment suddenly and left... I'm trying to keep it together and focus on NC and on myself.
Bless you, very helpful, day 6 of NC. It was something great and would love to see it reignite🙏
They don't change there mind, especially when they have someone else..
I'd really hope this is true. 10 months no contact and I feel worthless again. . . She's probably not gonna reach out.
Ceesar Joust 10 months holy shit
It’s sooo hard to date during this time with social media. People don’t Appreciate what they have until it’s gone. and it’s so easy for them to find someone else online.
Yup so true. I honestly want to find a nerd at a church & be with her forever.
@@nalveyna I would like something like that ...
Easy come. Easy go.
@@weeeone me to! Love shouldn't be painful it should be beautiful x
I agree completely. Very well said. Social media and dating apps have ruined old fashion traditional dating. It’s horrible. People are with 500 likes rather than a face to face to conversation
To everyone suffering in silence, stay strong. I have been suffering for days, only finding comfort in Coach Lee’s video and a few others. Today, listening to this video, I’m struck by the realization that I’m not so sure I even want him to return. I have accepted the rejection, I have accepted his retreat. I embraced the grief and cried as much as I needed to. I allowed myself to feel all of my love for him and all of the pain of my heartbreak. Today, my chest feels lighter. I am more clear headed. I feel twinges of happiness and excitement for my future and the unknown. If you are not for them, that merely means you are for someone else! Good luck to all ❤️
You are not alone. I’ve been 2 months of no contact. It’s hurts to think they don’t care. But.. they will realize how they left things some day.
You are not alone with the pain. I have been very up and down, crying often. Stay strong.
Throneless, I totally get it. I was with MY PERSON, her words for nearly 7 years. I was certainly not perfect but she led me to believe that WE were as close to perfect as anyone could be. Out of nowhere she dumped me in Sept. 2021. I reacted poorly and let her know how much she meant to me. Probably feeling sorry for me, she relented and came back to me. Actually knocked on my door to get the meeting started. We got back together for 2 months and of course she did it again, with the ole excuse of just feeling too much pressure. I could go on and on but it comes down to the fact now that I am beginning to feel as though I dont want her back. Like she says, it would be too much pressure! But this time I would be feeling the pressure as much as her!!!!
Thanks for your words of encouragement. I'm only into the 2nd week post breakup and it's killing me. I've never felt such emotional pain in my life. I'm glad you feel better and have taken it so well. Any updates you like to share since it's been a month from this post?
@@billyself9333 Omg that's exactly that happened to me. She broke up around 3 months ago and we ended up together again after a few days. Just before Xmas we got so close she decided to move in with me. By New Years Eve she broke up with me and moved out again. We were together for over 3 years and during that time there wasn't a day we didn't talk to each other. I've been trying the no contact strategy but it hurts so much :(
@@XKobe
hey there! First of all, I’m very sorry for the grief you’re experiencing, I know you’re hurting. Has it only been a month? It feels like much more time has passed. Update, he has reached out… several times. He is still my ex. And I feel even better now than I did when I posted my original comment. Healing is not linear, it’s not a straight or paved road. I’ve still had to deal with hard days and I know there are more to come. BUT, I’m at peace. The one thing that helped me most was taking all that pent up love I was storing for him and give it to myself.
Prioritize yourself.
Set goals, crush them.
Stay busy improving yourself.
Evolve.
I am so in love with who I am becoming and so excited to realize my goals and dreams.
Keep moving forward, and you will get there too.
68 days now of NC. Some days are easier, some are really bad. It helps to know that I'm not alone in this and that there are other people who have had it worse but turned out completely okay and healed after. Gotta be strong! 🙏🏼
Hugs 🤗 sometimes I cry sometimes I smile but I always remember to pray and ask god for closure , my partner broke up with me because of trust issues we being together for 14 years he thinks I’m cheating now but I can honestly say I’m not doing it , I’m going through nc right now , just hoping for the best
@@selenaG57 aww 14 years! Hope you’re okay. Gotta be strong! I admire the strength it took just to write your comment. Virtual hug! Wish you healing and strength! 🙏🏼
Literally, same here. Wishing you all the best, hope you feel happier and more healed than ever ❤️
You are not alone I left 6 yours ago
Its a lot! NC is mostly 1 month.
Don't feed an ego when you can upgrade
Van Paul word💥
I've seen some exes few years later and ZERO attraction
What it means
I think this is true. But too hard to do in the early stages of break up 🙁
@@vanpaul147 😂😂😂😂
It's really sad, how a person who you loved so much can turn out to be such cruel monster. I swear it really hurts, May God make them feel that same amount of pain they have caused the person who had loved them so much.
I feel the same way. Unfortunately I want him to hurt the way he hurt me. I want a woman to come into his life, treat him like a precious gem, he fall in love with her, then she tells him she wants to date other people and his heart falls out of his chest. Then he can call me and continue to apologize because he now knows how I feel. My "break up" is very new from a short relationship but it stings.
I feel the same way cuz they just laughing and talking and eating shiting like normal
I don't understand too. it's worst like than an enemy 😭
Wow!!!
@@edeal9251 I'm going thru same thing how r u I read your msg it's very painful I'm so sorry
I thought my father’s death would be the largest grief I would ever have to deal with! Losing the love of my life is killing me. I’m good one day and crawling on the floor the next! I pray I get through this intact 🙏🙏
Bart, give it TIME. TIME is a fantastic healer. God bless you..♥️⚘️
No one really talks about the grief, I think it's the absolute worse part of all of this. 💔
I started seeing someone too soon after my spouse died. I think I was still in shock and PTSD, trying to hang on to sanity. Being with him was a distraction from the pain of losing my spouse, and now I feel the full loss of my spouse as well as the loss of what the new person and I shared, which was what helped get me through that awful time. Well, I'm not through the grief, it's like I'm starting over- but now it's worse because this guy leaving me was a choice, not a tragedy.
Bart, how are you feeling now? 💛
So true.....that's the way I explained the pain to my daughter when my wife left me 2 months ago for a twice divorced man.....only the death of my mother was the worst heart break . Good luck to you and any other person reading this.
This man has literally done more for humanity than most noble prize winners, and I am actually not joking. Awesome Coach Lee
If your ex gf starts seeing someone else , just take that loss, learn from it and move on .
If they go to someone its because theyre filling a void of insecurity and that shows lack of respect of the relationship
You tell yourself that lol. Women move on faster than men.
@@mclarencroft2501 Everyone is different and those tend to be rebound relationships that end up failing more often than not. Just because they suppress their emotions and tell themselves they've moved on, doesn't mean they did. And those feelings are going to surface at some point down the line. Unless of course they're a psychopath, in which case, who needs them?
@@mclarencroft2501 if a quality women has attracted and great intimacy for a person during a year of relationship. And if they break up. Are they willing to move on fast with someone else? What do you think if she is a quality person with some ethics.
Good now they are someone else's problem, look at it that way. Go get some ass if you need too.
@@mclarencroft2501 happy rebounds. Lol!
“Don’t feed their egos!!!! 💯
Facts
AfricaN FuFu facts🔥🔥
Especially a narcissist
Yes yes. I always forget that..
Amen 🙏 🙌
Just to share, no contact period to me personally is supposed to regroup, recoup, recover and make yourself mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually stable again, so that once you know you are truly ready (you can always add an extra day to confirm) before you approach your ex. You need to ask yourself if you can stay calm, composed, unaffected and positive if your ex 1) ignores 2) rejects 3) reconcile with you. The key objective is be very sure that you're steady as a rock regardless the outcome. Hope this helps. And one more thing, you're gonna be fine.
I think that is better to not make the first step If you have tried everything before. I understand what you say, but It doesn't make much sense to reach out at the point you are describing.
Damn, bittersweet. These videos bring nostalgia to me. A year ago, I was crying with a pit in my stomach from being so hurt from him ending it with me. It took me 6 months until I started feeling like me again. And now I'm here today and I feel absolutely nothing for him, while I'm with my new partner who is amazing. Wow how life changes.
Love the AB pic lol but hope your doing well
Did the ex reached out to you at so e point?
@@GRDiplomat No, because I broke no contact several times, even stalked him kinda? He eventually told me to go away and now he knows I'm in a new relationship so he never reached out.
Remember eveyone who is going through the breakup issues , trust the universe ,trust the god. You attract wot you are. Just imagine yourself being with him at the moment everyday morning as if its happening now and then let it go and put all u r trust in the universe. They will come back. If u r negtive then u will attract negative things. Everythin will be fine . Breathe in and out and dont worry about anything and focus on yourself
What if they found some else already. My was with me for almost 2 years. He wanted to propose, I said No yet...no ready...I was honest. He swore He loved me and I had his heart....really? Hr He moved to fast and he they been together for 2 months. However, I love your positive actitud and message. I took a screenshot of it, to read it everytime I am negative :(
This is horrible advice
Law of attraction
Srimayavan Ganeshan why would you encourage someone to get back with someone if they don’t deserve it ? If they were good people they would still be together ..
Srimayavan Ganeshan is
focusing on a goal helps you get over a break up, for me its fitness right now
Mine too. But she goes to my gym haha
@@theaveragejoe6854 damn find a new gym
Did you move on from her?
@@theaveragejoe6854 request for for
Yep!! Nothing like having a great “revenge body” lol 💯👌👏🏅👍
Day 26 of NC. Just when I’m teetering on the edge of despair, I click on Coach Lee to bring me back to some semblance of sanity. Coach Lee you are a gift to all man and woman kind🙏❤️
Did he ever come back?
"You have to give another person the opportunity to learn your place in their life".. Amazing how this can be applied into any kind of relationships. During this hard time, I m listening your videos every single day, first thing in the morning, last before going to bed.
I'm not even sure "I want my ex back", however I see in this process you are pointing out an opportunity to heal. I sincerely thank you for this videos, I wish you a lot of prosperity, health and blessings for your work. Thank you 🙏🏻
Been in NC for over a month. There's no temptation to break it. I still think about him, but the rose tint has faded from my glasses. I've been busy with a new job, as well as juggling other interviews and trying to network. I've also been spending every other night at the gym, and participate in lessons once a week to build a skill I've wanted to develop my whole life. I'm actively pursuing things that terrify me -or at least, would have terrified my old self. It's amazing how you can go from feeling completely destroyed, to walking the path towards being someone you thought you could never be -all in a matter of a couple of months. I was terrified of people and crowds, yet I spent this month instructing a class of 35 people. I finally feel pride and a sense of accomplishment I've been chasing my whole life.
Way to go Kat. I've done the same...feels great doesn't it!
Kat G So happy ur thriving!
You are an inspiration to me, thank you
Great job, in the same position 9 month NC and I think she just forgot about me and moved on. She was a bit mess up in the head due to her last relationship. But, like you been upgrading myself bit by bit. Good story hopefully we can move on and stay strong.
Found out that my ex cheated on me 4 weeks ago she dumped me 3 weeks ago went into NC 2 weeks ago she texted me a week ago with a work issue I replied with an answer, nothing since, what do I do now
it doesnt matter if im sobbing, if im hitting a low point or im really jjst struggling, Coach lee always makes me feel calm and helps me think clearly and logically
Dont know if everyone gets reply.or how long it takes.i cant find where my question went
I feel the same. Without listening to Coach Lee's videos I would be a mess. I gain a lot of strength and perspective my listening to him.
100%
i got coach lee on prlly 5 hours a day lol it helps a lot
How are you doing now?
No contact works guysss.I am now back with my Ex after three months of no contact.I have learned a lot and found myself during that time .Mr Lee help me alot.Don't know you see this comment but Mr Lee thank you so much. You help me through this journey. Now,I have a lot of knowledges how to keep a relationship healthy.
I love how you discuss every single question that occurs in the mind of the dumpee that we don't ask to our friends anymore because we feel like those are silly questions / don't want to bother them / in some kind of way know the answer but still want someone to tell us lol. And that person to tell us is you! Thankyou coach Lee ♡
The best thing u can do is simple move on with your life, u can't predict If u guys will back together, Just let things go and enjoy the moment even if is bad, some days are easyer then others, eventually everything that is meant to be will be
Johnny Flow amen
C'est la vie c'est la vie. Whatever will be will be.
Everyone!!! No contact rule rly works!!!! My ex contacted me after more than two month of silence!!!! He’s just testing water now because he’s curious why I’ve been silent and not chased him!!!! I bought Coach Lee’s emergency breakup kit!!! Wish me luck!!!!
It did for me too but I was in no contact for 3 months and 22days and he reached out but it was casual he called 3 times and left a voicemail but I waited a few days and reached back out but idk I'm lost I love him and I want him back but he hasn't responded
@@jasminemiller5843 buy Coach Lee's emergency breakup kit!!! he explains steps on how to approach the situation!!!!
@@yk8301 thank you so much I really appreciate your help ❤
So happy for you Y K!!!!!
So happy for you
Yes, my ex lost her attraction. A big part of it was because of long distance. I mean the long distance also applied to me. I also was somewhat losing attraction, but I kept to the relationship because I'm loyal and believe you have to work on relationships, but a lot of people don't. It's easy come, easy go.
Hey basil, are you guys together ?
If it's any comfort my ex didn't lose it with me - but I lost it with myself and so she left.
Same here..@@petecoventry6858
I've come to accept that he doesn't want a relationship with me. Constant stonewalling. I wish him peace and light.
Words of encouragement for anyone in the comments going through a fresh break up ! Mine happened in October 2019 came across coach lee binge watched his vids they helped SUPERBLY ! I thought I’d never get over the pain and now I’m at a point where I have no feelings for that person at all ..it’s amazing ! listen to this guy ! please 🙏🏾 and whatever you do ..don’t use other people to distract you from them genuinely heal from the hurt so it doesn’t carry into your next relationship in the form of insecurities/trust issues !
It's been a year and 4 mos. I'm still not over him. We were married for 35yrs. I've tried NC but I always have something to say so I email him and he doesn't respond. I wish I could be strong.
Rocky Waters 35yrs is wayy too much attachment that is why you’re still hurting but it’s still not too late to get over it .. it’s possible
This is the best i read so far 👍. Mostly important is to not use other people to distract ur pain and sadness
Did they ever contact you back? I feel like it’s soo hard but I know I need to move on
Ericka T you know what, some people believe after treating others so bad that if they just remove a person from their life that they never have to apologize or change their behavior. They didn’t contact me but they didn’t delete me on social media either. Weird. They’re the last thing on my mind and it feels good 🙏🏾
Don't look backwards unless you plan on going that way. If it wasn't good then, it wont be good now. Take time to realize you are actually lucky to get out of something that wasn't right, and move on.
Plain, simple, straight to the point. God damn all these word salads from coaches.
Hell yeah, exactly! 💪💯
Cool video, My relationship of 5 years ended a month ago. The love of my life decided to move on, I really loved her so much i can’t stop thinking about her and the memories we shared. I’ve tried my very best to get her back in my life, but to no avail. I’m frustrated, and i don’t see my life with anyone else. I’ve done my best to get rid of the thoughts, but i can’t. I don’t know why I’m saying this here, but i really miss her and i wish i could get her back.
I have been in such a situation. My relationship ended about three years ago, but i could not let her go. So i had to do all i could to get her back, i had to seek the help of a spiritual adviser who helped me bring her back. We are back together, and i must say i am enjoying every moment.
Amazing, how did you get a spiritual counselor, and how do i reach her?
Her name is Maurice Gleti, and she is a great spiritual counselor who can bring back your ex.
Thank you for this valuable information, i just looked her up now online. impressive
God will heal you sir.. put it on God's hands 🙏
First TH-camr who's able to really drill down and explain comprehensible the dynamics of silence and why it's a first aid kid which should actually comes natural but there are are specific emotional involvements in relationships which makes us overlook this simplicity. If we were to compare it with an argument between friends we would be completely okay with some silence.
I’m giving it three months. Despite quarantine playing some kind of role on our minds. I’m in month 1.
Kat M I'm in the same boat my dear.
African king sorry to hear... this sucks pretty bad. Despite all the work I’m trying to do on myself some days are just HARD. But keeping patient and hoping for the best outcome. At the end of the day we don’t want to be with someone who can’t wholeheartedly care for us how we can for them. They do say people can only meet you as deep as they meet themeselves so... wishing my ex luck on their journey of self discovery and hoping we can continue to grow together but if we can’t then peaceeee
Same few days away from 1 month :( and this quarantine also yes, you cant go out.. I want to go. To the gym, go cut my hair buy some. Nice clothes.. Baaah..
I kinda hope she comes around, but i know that she doesnt see her mistakes, she is allways right, allways putting guilt on me, i adapt she doesnt.. But i love her idk :( i also made some Mistakes, i could kiss here some more ahhh, i keep kicking my head that its all my faulth, but it isnt :/ But it makes you think, " what if they think i should reach out bcs they think that it was my mistake?
I’m in the same boat too, almost been a month and although quarantine sucks... it’s also a blessing too. Think about it. You’re facing yourself you got no one but yourself to work on and honestly you know he or she isn’t gonna do anything either but build them self up. Take a perspective on it. Stay strong guys we’re all in it together. If you go out go clubbing keep yourself busy you’re literally only hiding the pain inside whereas now YOU CAN FACE IT!
@@Kausleek i dont see it as a blessing bcs if they dont miss you now they wont even after they start going out.. I think mine waas cheating on me.. And its probably a guy from her area, so not a blessing at all..
My ex is a terrible person, started talking to a married man, and a bunch of other dudes "the day we split". Dont date girls who smoked weed when they have asthma
You definitely deserve better
I’m sorry but the last sentence cracked me up 😂😂😂
Don't say dat...i hav asthma and i started smokin b cuz i am sooo stressed out wit my breakup...dat is y i felt d need 2 smoke. We get angry and frustrated and blame d opposite gender...but we r all in dis together. I am female and s'times i tink all men r d same. But who knows. Maybe God wil make my life better som day and show me dat i cud find a decent man who loves me 4me.
River Smith lmfaooooo
😂😂I feel attacked,I'm asthmatic but few puffs make me relax,I ain't like your ex though 😂😂
I feel so helpless, sad and heartbroken 💔 people can be so cruel. One minute you’re lovers, then..strangers.
cyberaga20, let me recommend Coach Lee's Emergency Breakup Kit for you which will help you immensely. It has EVERYTHING in it including strategies for every situation including yours
myexbackcoach.com/ebk
I got to say this is a terrific message. And I know from experience. This is spot on, and anybody who's dealt with a stuck-up ex who thinks she is suddenly better than you needs to hear this man's advice.
I do not want my ex--ever! I'm just watching these videos because the coach is soooo good looking!
Hehehehe 😆
Oh really 🤣😂
😂😂😂😂👌👌👠
😂😂
Hahaha he is...lets try the no contact on him🤣956-***-****
It's been 8 months I've walked away. No contact I'm just done. 30 yrs together 25 yrs of marriage, and unfaithful the entire time. The last injury just cut too deep. We are too far in and older now to keep going through the same thing like enough is enough. I blame myself for enabling and allowing so many things to slide. I was just in a dark place I wasn't ready. At this point idc if the lesson is learned now I'm never going back despite it's killing me because I've been with this person from the age 14. I'm just done... I have nothing left to say.
How are you dear
Yes, I'm doing great haven't backslide still no contact. I'm now a homeowner doing things all on my own and it feels good. I'm not dating i don't know how to just working on me. I discovered for the first time my favorite color is orange or in that tone. I went back to being creative drawing and painting. It's funny when I hear people say I didn't know you could do so and so...yeah I just didn't have the motivation because my light was dimmed. I went to France earlier this year, then to the alps where I tried skiing for the first time. Celebrated my bday with close friends. I planted some vegetables in my garden which I was able to cook with😂😂 now I'm planning my trip for next year to Korea, and Japan. I'm also going back to the Alps, and a few more escapes. I must say I'm blessed. Thank you for checking up on me.
I love when you tell the truth in convincing and convicting detail. Don't be scared to do that Coach Lee, this is what we need to hear. If your ex has kicked you to the curb, let them feel the feeling of missing you. Do not contact them. Not under any circumstances. Not for Christmas, not for their birthday, not for your anniversary. Not for anything. And when they respond to you in the future, do not respond to any flippant message that you received. They f***** up and they need to know it.
I miss our memories, not him.
I realized how much I love him and how hard it is to lose him during no contact, but I don’t want him anymore
True, sometimes you think back on the fun times. Then you get sideswiped by the horrible memories. There were more horrible times for sure. Really horrible.
Man you’re AWSOME human being, we need a lot of your type in this world ... you have a kind spirit about your therapy!!!👊🏽❤️
Best line I’ve heard so far “don’t accept the bread crumbs , you deserve the whole ‘loaf’ and the damn table! 🙌🏻
So grateful for you Coach Lee!! Your videos are helping me get through my break up and the extreme anxiety, sadness and heartache I’ve been dealing with. Blessings to you and family 🙏❤️🤩
You've hit the nail on the head coach if they found happiness somewhere else you should let them go and be happy for them
Coach Lee ,you are amazing .I am in no contact for almost one month.And everyday is a struggle but when I listen to you it relaxes me .Your emergency break up kit is amazing .Thank you for all your help .
Thank you coach Lee .You are the one I go to all day everyday .I am not giving up hope .You give me hope everyday ❤️
“You have to give people the opportunity to learn your place in their life.” 💯
This guy is such a healer🙏🏻 I’ve been struggling with this breakup for weeks, also knowing it was going to happen! Listening to this guy just makes me smile and feel that getting back to myself again isn’t too far away😁 Thankyou Lee👍
Day 2 no contract rule, it is so hard, i cried today but I am stronger again after hearing from Coach Lee. I have assignment deadlines tonight and i have a lot of work to focus on. Stay strong people!
Sweetie I feel your pain 4 days for me. We can do this
mine was 7 years, i
finally find out , he has a wife. He said he couldn’t leave his daughters, and he’d live in misery. he’s got me blocked everywhere with his wife, she found about me. it been since April, i’ll
never come back, He had left on my iphone his address. i told home to delete it, but he won’t,🤣
@@heidi1354 what happened.?
Coach Lee, i need your help :((
Hug
This comment has a snowballs chance in hell
I remember my ex told me when we were still together that ALL of his ex comes back begging for him to take them back. So no wonder if he'll expect me to beg for him which I won't. That's a red flag! I'm glad he said that earlier. I know now what's best for me. 😂
Mine said that too, i looked at him smiled and said oh well I'm glad you will be the one who will come and beg sweetheart.
Mine said that too and she’s following me and my girlfriend of 6 years from a fake page. 😂
Patricia Ann Batis girl my ex was like that LMFAOO I was the exception I didn’t beg for him nor looked for him I’m still hurting but it’s okay
Yes my ex said the same. Exes chase him. Me never so he chased me instead. But haven't heard from him for one month now . Let's see who will be crying again
Narcissist !!!
I also dated a bloody bastard narcissist
He used to cachinate when I sobbed !!! 😠😡😤🤬🤬🤬
If she’s going on dates with other guys, I dont want her back ✋ 🛑
There are other good Love Advice coaches giving similar advice to Coach Lee, but how he says these things is some how more effective on me. It resonates. Thank you. These videos about no contact are my backbone sometimes.
All I can say is that I would be absolutely stuffed and more broken than if I haven't had these amazingly powerful videos to watch. I put them on when I weaken and feel like contacting, Love ya work Coach Lee. Deb King Australia
I'll just give you an update. Almost 2 years no contact and now I'm married to alcohol. Thanks for the advice
LMAO!!!
So funny, sorry to say🤭. Hang in there
3 years old this video is and it’s still helping people all over. Appreciate you.
LRD... Been 1 week today since I started NC. I'm going crazy, I'm not okay with these weird emotions. I wake up with gut wrenching pain and walk with it all day. It only goes away when I sleep. This cycle of being okay and not okay is killing me 😭
I just listen to you Coach Lee all day or whenever i think of him. I dont want to break no contact this time... this was his second chance and he messed up!!
You’re 💯 correct, one of the best coaches I watched 👍🏽
Depends with the situation why would you like to wait for the person who abandoned you? when you move one, JUST MOVE On, don't do NC for you to get back together use it for your own sanity.
I would have happily moved on and was trying and then lockdown happened.. I'd made plans, going back to college and corny yes but Joining a gym with a specialist trainer.. I was getting in a good place, plus u can't date cause of the situation.. very frustrating..
@@misslanapford9169 I’m ok
Coach Lee you are on point and another great video that you've made. I've gone 80 days of no contact so far, it's the longest I've gone considering on previous occasions I was the one to break the no contact rule usually within 2 - 3 weeks. It's been a tough 80 days, some days are easier than others but you do get through it. My ex will not reach out more than likely as she has the narcissistic traits. She thinks she is better than everyone else. If they don't value your absence they will not appreciate your presence. I get lonely at times, I miss that connection, to wake up in the morning with not having a text message and knowing someone cares about you is hard. Stay strong my friends, I too thought that I'd never stick to the no contact rule but this time it has worked for me even though in the past I broke it and regretted it afterwards. Love and hugs to you all out there and stay true to yourself. 🙏
@@sophierobert7941 ... Still in no contact. Nothing has changed. It's been 150 days since my last contact and I feel alot better for it.
Start lifting it's like the gateway to finding yourself again! Coach lee is the best of the best. We're all gonna make it.
You are such a wise and intelligent person, Coach Lee. I am forever grateful for happening upon your channel and all the information that came with it.
90 days no contact. My dreams and thoughts are still haunted by her. My house is full of her abscense. I want to forget her but my future was planned out with her being with me. So there isn't a tomorrow. Today is pain and I live in yesterday.
John McCarty ... It is very very hard but try stay busy and try not overthink! You are stronger than you think!
Feel the same,, seeing future with him and now seems like no tomorrow 😭
I feel you.
@@merceditatorreon9020 I think all of us who had a long steady relationship, go through this when we end it
I feel like they is no tomorrow again 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭🔪
I would still be stuck handing my break up the wrong way. Your advice is a breath of fresh air when I was gasping to breathe and had no idea what to do next. Dude your helping so many people no matter what dynamic Ex or no ex you help all of us get through the toughest times of our lives. If it was easy we wouldn’t be watching or listening, just want to say thank you So much for keeping me focused. Still no ex but there is always hope for ourselves to be better with the right steps. Thank you!
Keep going Im in a breakup since Thursday,shitty time of year for it to happen
Sometimes when i deeply think about my ex, looking constantly at her Messenger profile with the question "Does she unblocked me yet?" i watch one of your videos and it helps me to move forward in my day and not being an emotional wreck. I'm on day 45 today and i bet on my worth, so i will not reach out ❤
I have been in no contact for two months one week. He blocked me but messaged me because he saw me post a message of my ante who is dead. He even called a friend to confirm when I wasn't answering him. Silence is golden. They will monitor you but in the end,you will know your life is better without them.
My ex texted me while I was in the middle of watching this. I thought I was seeing things lol
Wow great
Back together?
I wish I could bring that karma to me! Pray for me
This made me laugh. I hope we back back together :)
whether we come back together or not, I have to say you bro is a rock (now do not feel ego in that LOL). I mean it, these lessons are not only for a comeback situation, but It is also for life! I have read so many articles and watched so many videos, honestly keep it up bro! your videos are authentic, masculinity-free ( not like others where it is all about ego ...etc), and balanced opinion. High Five, keep it up!
I’ve watched & listened to other coaches… but this guy is damn near perfect 👌🏻 with his evaluations/ points of view of how the mind works & coming up with strategies to resolve these relationship matters.
Thank you coach Lee!I feel better now. Every thing you said is sooo true. Your voice and eye contacts with fans are soo good , and you help my go through the break up.
Im 2 weeks in and it's hard abit especially with this lock down here in new Zealand. I'm stuck with my thoughts all day everyday for another 2 weeks🤦♂️
Bud Bub think tho so are they more than likely
here also don't overthink too much that would make you feel better
1week🤦♂️
Bud Bub use this time to work on yourself... if you get back together you want things to improve, not be the same... true change of growth can take a while it’s just as high maintenance as a relationship Bc it’s a relationship with yourself. The most important one of all
April 21st it was supposed to be our 4 years Annivesary but he broke up with me. It all came in so sudden, totally devastated and shattered. He has blocked my no, blocked me in WhatsApp but he accepted my request my on fb. I don't understand what to think of it?.
Your videos have given me a lot of insight the last couple weeks. My boyfriend of three years left me... Saying he felt like a lousy boyfriend for not being there for me (we with work in health care and with the pandemic it's understandable). But he also said that he doesn't feel like he's boyfriend material.... It's been hard coping, especially considering he hasn't changed his social media status, and I still have belongings at his house. I don't want to lose hope and I keep praying that we will be together again
this video is so good, its exactly explained what my ex BF was trying to do while breaking up with me. It was a ego boost and he still want me to satisfy it somehow.
@@marshmellow4855 Not for long. Trust me 🤦
Coach lee is amazing, he got me through some hard times. I followed all his advice and I feel much much better.
Thanks Coach lee, I’m in the same boat too, almost been a month and although quarantine sucks... it’s also a blessing too. Think about it. You’re facing yourself you got no one but yourself to work on and honestly you know he or she isn’t gonna do anything either but build them self up too. Take a perspective on it. Stay strong guys we’re all in it together. If you go out for clubbing or do extracurricular activities to keep yourself busy you’re literally only hiding the pain inside whereas now YOU CAN FACE IT. You got this.
True!
Coach Lee thanks so much for the insight. I feel I had no other choice but to be the dumper. We were engaged for 13 years. That explains it in a nut she'll. You're videos have been a comfort to me during this agonizing time. Marriage and children are deal breaking issues. Talking about it didn't work. I feel I had no choice but to be the dumper. I hope it doesn't make me a narcissist for wanting him to fix things.
Don't go where you are tolerated. Go where you are celebrated.
I feel so much better after watching your videos. It has been 10 days without any contact and i feel better with myself. After a breakup I made many mistakes like calling, texting for 2 weeks and I hope that it isn't too late to fix it :(
The whole reason I'm going no contact is because I know that I can't go through another fight like this in the future. I know if I'm the one to smooth this over he will just keep taking advantage of me. If NC doesn't work, reconciling wouldn't have worked either. It would be two dead ends. I'm just hoping no contact works.
Silence means , she’s moved on , she’s dating , she’s working , she’s getting on with her life .
You need to do the same , stop obsessing, stop contacting her , stop putting her on a pedestal,
And how in the world do u know that?
That's not exactly true
Once it’s ‘over’ it over. You can never go back, you have to move on. The process of letting go of the attachment you developed will be like going through drug and alcohol withdrawal for an addict.
True
“Don’t feed their ego” 👌🏻
My ex reached out to me a few times during no contact, hot and cold, i dont get it, i waited a day to respond to his text. Nothing on Valentines day, I decided to take good care of myself and move on, what ever happens happens, who cares. Enjoy my life first.
linda l do u boo, waiting on him to step up isn’t worth it. Real love doesn’t hurt you!
Maybe he just want to make sure you are still there loving him but he was not serious.
T W1978 ever heard the saying true love hurts. It does. Would you want to be with someone who gives up on you when problems arise. Love is more complex than attraction, intimacy, and passion. All love hurts. It’s about finding someone who you believe is worth hurting for and both having respect and love for each other you’ll do anything for that person.
He break up me by a text said better us to stop chatting should i reply him i keep silent and i didn't teven reply is it right ?
Mine was hot and cold.. wanting one minute not INTERESTED the other.. then texted he thought I should DELETE his number, so I went in to no contact and 4 weeks later, I actually did.. I thought it would look odd doing it straight away. But I feel like I want it to stay that way. I know him well enough to know they're is someone else hence the cold and that at some point it will not be working and they'll be fall out or with will lose interest..
Coach Lee you mentioned we could share our story.
I was with an absolutely incredible man and he ended it. We have all of the same boxes checked and what we shared was magical, like nothing either of us ever felt and we discussed just how the extent of our attraction to the other was like cosmic, not like previous relationships where you might try it out and see if you can love someone. What ever we felt was in our bones and had us asking ourselves what the heck is going one because at 36 and 40, neither of us had ever felt that was about anyone else. So great start to a relationship and it did move really fast. My friends said we were flowing like we had been married for 10 years and they thought it was odd.
Then within about a 2 week span, he started all of a sudden not wanting to be in a relationship. I was dealing with my grandpas death, and he was not over his fathers death wish was recent but before we met, but he had just spread his dads ashes, (he was his dads PSW caretaker for the last 8 months of his life and his dad died in his arms at home - grey traumatic) so I think whatever going on with my grandpa and my grief was a trigger for his grief and he just said he felt he needed to talk to someone, wants to be alone and doesn’t want to be in a relationship... there was a bit of arguing over the last two weeks mostly because he just felt irritable and he had apologized and just felt like he had no patience or tolerance for anyone.
Before I viewed your video on gifts, I did send him a birthday gift in the mail and he insisted on giving it back or reimbursing me. And said again he just wants to be alone. 6weeks went by and I dropped off a gift Christmas Eve and just silence. This is when I started listening to your no contact videos. I’m trying, really trying. On January 12th, I sent him a generic email for info about sept. JK registration with our school board because I know it’s what he wanted for his son (I’m a teacher). No good or bad feedback but I feel like he would have appreciated the heads up about it so he is just as informed as his ex and have more say in terms of shared custody and decision making on their son.
I’m back to no contact again. And yes we are in an extremely strict lockdown in Ontario Canada so No one can leave other than for groceries, pharmacy, exercise or walking the dog... no social gatherings outside your household, lots of hefty fines for this... so we can’t see each other any ways.
I know we were together a short time but how I feel about him is not goi my away, and only getting stronger with time, I’m fine with waiting just can’t accept it if he doesn’t come back because I do not want anyone else... I want him, no matter if he loses his job or god forbid is paralyzed from the neck down, I want him through whatever life throws at us.
I am not interested in anyone else out there. I feel like I would need him to move on with someone else first for me to accept there isn’t a chance for us.
I know you can’t really answer this but none of your videos touch on what a man needs to feel ready for a relationship, or how men deal with grief or depression. I have one brother who was depressed for 4 years (about 10 years ago) and there wasn’t anything we could do to snap him out of it. My other brother wanted to just be alone for over a year after a 5 year breakup and nothing we could do to help him, he just wanted to be left alone. I feel like this is where Jay is at with grieving his father. I’m ok with waiting and wish he would just let me in and be there to support him. How long could it take for this situation? How long should a no contact be in place for a situation like this? Obviously longer. He is also the workaholic keep him self occupied task oriented type (no substance issues whatsoever - otherwise a very healthy strong man of great leadership)
Just want to apologize for all my autocorrect spelling mistakes. This box is so little to type in and with a lot of text. I should have reread it before posting it. I hope you can mentally correct and understand my message.
Thank you 🙏🏻 😊
@@jessiebebe Any update?
You made my day.😊 I wish I was him ..if he could read this and understand the love and respect within you …
The worst is trying to heal from an intense trauma-bond, not only are having to process the pain from the break up but you're having to feel their emotions and pain simultaneously, it's just horrific. 😐💔
It's an addiction. Break the Trauma Bonding AND soul ties...
YOU ARE A VERY GOOD INSTRUCTOR MAN ! GREAT WORK !
Coach Lee, I want to share something with you and the posters who are feeling sadness. My girlfriend called me and we chatted and told me her boyfriend from 30 years ago texted her out of the blue and asked her to go out with him for a coffee they met and talked and decided they were going to try to patch up the relationship . From that day on they are working on getting back together . He told her that he has been thinking and wondering about her. They have been in no contact for longer then the 30 years. he was a little afraid to contact her. They are both taking it slow and enjoying the time they are spending together. So hang in there guys.
That guy waited 30 years.....
What are the updates
Thank you so much coach Lee I was shattered broke and I also chased my ex couple of times and the breakup which occurred couple of weeks ago but now I feel better ur videos have helped me alot to heal myself
COACH LEE IS THE ONLY MAN TO LISTEN TO ON TH-cam IF YOU WANT YOUR EX BACK!! Good afternoon Coach Lee, your emergency breakout kit do work. I Used it and I got my ex back in 2 weeks. No Contact is the Power, thanks Coach Lee.
Darius, you are the man!
yeah same here this guy is legendary i'm still on day 5 with the no contact but i can tell that he knows what he's talking about i can't afford the breakup kit so i'll just listen to his videos instead i'll text my ex after a month and a half but for now staying away as coach lee says is the best
I would like to say that NC rule it's working as well for short time relationship. Few years ago I had boyfriend who loved me so much, I felt that I just liked him and I didn't feel anything special. I broke up with him and he was so sad. We have been together just 5 months. In general he stayed no contact. I remember that after 2 months of NC he sent me message but I didn't reply because I though he should be with somebody who will truly love him. But after this he stayed NC all time for few months. In this time I understood how much I miss him and want him back. After next 7 months he sent message again and then I replied and we started to date again :)
Same situation for me, I loved her so much, but she got scared, didn’t feel as much as me....
@@vksander1412 give her time and try to keep no contact rule and try to learn life without her this time :)
Already since 10 December no contact man!
Since 7 November she broke it off, 2/3 month relationship.
Thank you for this story, it gives me hope
you are the best relationship coach then anyone out there... i havent gaven up hope... other person has told me usually they will miss u for a month and move on just move on and dont even try they told me ... we have been broken up by 2months a week now... i saw his instagram and he recently been going out drinking with group of friends ... 4girls and 2guys... by looken at that i so regretted.... made me want to reach out so i quickly went to look at ur vdos u saved me lol thank u i reached out once when he broke it off... i wont reach out .... its his turn ... if he doesnt then his lost. and yes he was a narcissistic! he told me all his exes chased him when they broke up ... i wont be like their ex!! i am strong!!!!
My wife of 19 years may have watched some of your videos (or other similar videos) we met during some extraordinarily difficult times in both of our lives. I've always felt like she was the only reason that I'm still above ground. And she used to literally sing Better Middlers Wind beneath my wings to me. We have five boys together and we've been going through some tough times. I had been self medicating my PTSD with all kinds of different things. I Lost a lot of weight and stopped working out. I gave her anything she asked for whenever she asked but I know I wasn't really there for her. She took the kids 2 states away and I didn't hear from her for two months. I was so miserable I figured that the only thing that was going to keep me from putting a bullet in my brain was finding someone else to fill the void. I gave it a shot with 2 different women and it was a disaster with both. They were nice enough but being that close to someone else literally made me sick to my stomach. My Grandfather died and I decided to drive to Texas so I could visit my boys on the way there and back. The whole time she was gone I was hitting the weights with a vengeance and was probably in better shape then when we met. I got held up last minute and didn't have time to see them on the way to Texas (she didn't know I was coming anyway) but she let me see the boys on the way home. She was furious that I didn't see them on the way out. She somehow knew all kinds of things that I had been doing and I wasn't going to lie to her. She got really angry the first day but invited me to go swimming with her and the boys the next day. In 19 years of marriage I've only seen her in a swimsuit in public twice so I was completely dumbfounded when she showed up in a swimsuit and got in the pool. She's always been a little chubby but I've always thought that she was beautiful. She still is. She wouldn't tell me where she lives and I didn't push it but she did go to the movies with us the next day and bowling the day after. I told her I'd be moving back so I could be near my kids at the end of the month and she gave me pointers on how to make the move easier. I'm still not sure whether she wants me back or not but I can't imagine us not being with each other. She hugged me goodbye and complained about her chronic shoulder pain the whole time and let(or made)me rub it. What do you think she's thinking?
Update?
It’s funny when I was in a relationship there were a lot of things about her I didn’t like. I wanted to end things myself a few times. But I didn’t. When she broke up with me I was shocked. I couldn’t believe it. All of the sudden I felt like I loved her and lost something amazing. When really I didn’t have those feelings during the relationship. She said slot of mean things when we broke up that hurt my feelings and made me feel self conscious. And the fact she hasn’t spoken to me or even made any effort makes me feel worse. I think I just want to know they miss me and are thinking about me. That I’m not all those things they said I was but all the things I was in the beginning of the relationship. I don’t think I want her back, just want myself back if that makes sense,
@@tedkartoffel it’s funny now that I remember I wrote this I’m almost embarrassed because I don’t care at all 🤷🏻♂️ 😂 plenary of fish in the sea 🌊
I can totally relate with this.
@@robertbeckham3091 amazing update bro. glad you're better. however i'm in the same space you were in 2 years ago.
Robert, almost the same thing happened to me with the ex girlfriend… I just got out of a divorce in 2018 had to sell the house 50/50 split walk away with a good chunk of money… bought another house...I knew my ex gf years ago finallyhooked up with her we hit it off really good exercise together and a great dancer … I told her am not ready to get married again maybe in the future after awhile she was looking for excuse to dump me … she found iI know she has another boyfriend I told her am happy for her, but I am not, but no contact is what I am doing now… when one door closes, many will open up her loss… The last thing I told her I love you, set her free 😃.
I'm there with you bro
Hi Coach Lee! I am so thankful to see this video of yours, i got dumped by my ex during the pandemic and i was reaching out to my partner still but no response. But after seeing this, i got enlighten. Thank you for your videos!
He broke up with me, I let him go. Not beginning anyone. I did my BEST to work things out, and wasn’t good enough. He’s too proud to admit all his wrongs so be it. There’s someone better for me out there who would truly appreciate me the way I deserve.
Wow, your videos are a God sent.! The way you break everything down. I will highly recommend this TH-cam platform to anyone I know going thru a breakup.
Love yourself ......put yourself first and everything will fall in to place. Work on yourself!