Now but 5 min later: no marriage, situationship, women stop listening and starting to create problems after 3 years, end of situationship, new situationship, repeat -> and if you want children - go to country that will protect your rights - ergo only patriarchal ones. This will reach all countries - but different countries will be changing rules slowly - ergo you have to think like with setting up company. Once you are earning enough you move to tax heaven and setup structure. I figured after last situationship where after 3/4 years girl went delulu that no more longer then 1 year relationships in EU, central europe, eastern europe (same shit) -> I'm only going into relationship in country that in case of divorce I will get full parenting rights as I have more money. there are few. And as I want children - thats only rational desicision to do as In EU after 10 years some delulu women will start braking their future. And I cannot allow that - have to be prepared to become single father in 10 years as thats seems to be situation - so have to be in position and country where I will win full parenting rights fast and without problems - and if delulu one will want to go - she can - without money, children and support. :) So no marriage in the west. ;) Definitevely don't buying the "partner" etc. shit - it exists only in disney movies and TV - modern women are lost possibility to be trustworhy partner.
My mum took a chance on my father. He turned out to be a violent drunk. After a divorce where she lost her share of the marital home but got custody, she then married a kind widower who turned out to be a lazy sponger. At 45, she told people who asked her if she planned to marry again, “no!” I guess those marriages were not that rewarding.
Men who were sleazes used to be able to get away with this, this probably happened in the 80s or 90s or latest early 2000s. After Internet became more advanced women gained the upper hand and now you can see the stats show an overwhelming majority of divorces are initiated by women with the law favouring her mostly now. My parents were also like yours and got married around 1990. They are divorced by a mile now and we the children are left with this reality and the much darker fate of the future of long term and committed relationships.
@@PureYang0 Seen enough divorced men comment they're much happpier without her and should have paid earlier to be done with them. F=m-le nature , the games, the lies, the manipulation, nagging, entitement etc is always there, even if the gov't doesn't impair your ability to keep iti check. You'd also need stirct social and religious traditions on your side as some countries have figured out. They understand what would happen if they gave an inch.
My arrogant, deceased brother-in-law said i didn't know what i was talking about when i said he would regret marrying my sister. His increased alcohol and tobacco use contributed tonhis death at only 54 and there's no doubt the stress of living with my sister has a lot to do with it.
My uncle's wife divorced him and got everything. The paper put her maiden name as his last name My mom read it and said they even took his name from him.
It is only good that men avoid getting married, if marriage doesn't suit them. Women don't want to marry men who don't want to be married to women. Nobody should be forced to become married or stay married. Just make sure to have prenups if you feel insecure about the money and assets you owned before marriage - and remember the children are as much both of yours, so the courts will always keep you responsible for them. Never let your wife go without an income of her own.
If a man doesn't want to marry a woman because she's not pretty enough or she isn't his type many of them will try to trap him if he's good looking or rich. As for pre nups check with a lawyer first because they can be thrown out but I'm my state a man needs to buy his house first and not intermingle their money.
@@DNA350ppm Prenups routinely get tossed out to the point they are practically useless. Also, " Never let your wife go without an income of her own." Why? I thought she was strong and independent. If she wants a divorce, she should also expect a separation from any financial assistance aside from child support.
More specifically circa 2007 and the advent of the 'smart phone', dating apps, and social media exponential growth killed it for men. Women suddenly didn't have to wait to be approached but had 100s of suitors daily begging them for attention. This created an inflated self-worth and eventually, narcissism in most women. Marriage? Don't be ridiculous. No man current day with more than two brain cells would give that a second thought in 2024+.
Modern women define themselves with masculine traits now. So there are men with male genitalia and female genitalia. They are combative, not cooperative. Don't marry.
there are no benefits for a man to marry. the only two outcomes are eternal misery, divorce. whats killing them is, no marriage = no more transfer of funds, or divorce ra pe.
What I find hilarious is how on earth in 2024 men is not using their logical brains and realizing Marriage is literally a contract that includes a third party (the government) in it allows a third party INTO your relationship and gives the third party power, Why on earth would you do that???? Do men know you can actually have companionship without it?? Woman practice hypergamy so yes they want you to sign the contract with government, Ask yourself if your Woman made more money than you would you require them to sign a contract to be with you??? Woman don’t love you.
After separation and toxic relationship with my toxic wife for 16 years I become introvert... I'am 44 years old male... I live solo life and become introvert 🤗 I love my single little rustic cabin in the near by Oregon forest... I decided to escape from my existence city life to different reality to connect with nature and simplicity where I feel like myself again😃✨...I love traveling alone to the new fresh places outdoors...love nature mountains... hiking... I like so much grilling by the lake in open fire fresh Sea foods like fish, beef with vegetables and enjoying warm fireplace at the same time.. IAM enjoying simple moments in present.... Catching fresh breath of salty breeze... feeling gentle wind in my face 🌬️🌊🍃....IAM away from city and negativity... away from rude people and nonsense.....I finally find myself surrounded in the pure tranquility and pacification vibe....in the nature by myself Iam feel like myself ...it's ultimate peace of mind and positive energy.. gives you joy, happiness and purpose to live life this way🤗😃🤙✨🍄🍃🌾🌱🌿☘️🍀🌳🌲⛰️🏞️
Women want the attention and validation of a WEDDING. They soon realize after they don't want to be married. Hypergamy kicks in and within days MOST are thinking "what have I done, I can do better!!"
@@kengaroo5170- unfortunately, it’s a little more complicated than that and will literally strip you of your assets and wealth when she inevitably becomes bored with you!
Not everyone is meant to be married. Just like not everyone is meant to be a parent. Some parents suck at it and mess up their kids’ lives. Not everyone is meant to be a pet owner. Same reasons. Unfortunately, some people get married young and are not mature enough for the hard work and mature problem solving that marriage often entails. When I doubt, stay single.
This is something he has not uncovered yet. The wisest men that ever walked this earth understood that empowering women will always leed to the same thing...bigger governments, socialism, tyranny and societal collapse. There is no way around this. We just need enough strong men that understand this when the bad times come, so we can re-assert, and let the weak men die or cry. "Once made equal to men women become his superior".
Family court, counselors, CPS, child support cash flows going to the state, forensic accountants, custody evaluators…the ticks weigh more than the dog.
Well women as a whole vote for Communist style programs. So its not Equality, but essentially loss of Freedom that men gave their lives for to secure, that has now been voted away by the Hive Mind that women embrace. There is no righting this ship until men realize that another war will take place to restore what has been lost. Something like 90% of all Government Assistant Programs go towards women, think about it and get back to me...
I will never forget the hate filled eyes that shown across the courtroom at me when the judge asked both parties, “Is there any way to save this marriage?” Over 21 years marriage plus two years of dating. That was the most poignant moment.
@WildMidwest1 I'm sorry for you, Brother. I hope things are better now. I booted my last and final one recently. Going to keep it just me and the dog. Monk Pug for the win. Good luck to you, man.
Sadly modern society has exposed women's true nature, selfish and lustful. She never loves you only how you make her feel and by what you can provide. I wish someone taught me this when I was young...
It's not just that, it's the whole redpill book of knowledge. Most people I know and meet are still bluepill. When I was going through the divorce process in 1998 to 2001, I was utterly clueless about the truth of female nature. Ten years ago I remember hearing a few redpill pioneers but couldn't take it all in. A few years later I finally properly understood how paradoxically contemporary "marriage'" destroys more than it makes, from your average man's perspective. I could forgive myself for the annihilation and suffering I'd cluelessly inflicted on myself by marriage. It's as dumb as signing up to fight an Oligarch's war with delusions of patriotism, yada, yada.
This captivating video triggers a flood of painful memories from the end of my 6 year relationship just three months ago. The woman I loved with all my heart chose to walk away, leaving me grappling with an insurmountable sense of loss. Despite my relentless efforts to salvage what we had, I'm left feeling disillusioned and unable to imagine a future without her. Despite my attempts to move on, I'm drawn to express my deep-seated longing for her here.
The struggle to release someone dear to your heart is undeniably arduous. I empathize, having experienced a similar circumstance when my 8-year relationship concluded. Refusing to accept defeat, I pursued every conceivable avenue to reclaim his affection. Eventually, I sought the assistance of a spiritual counselor, whose wisdom and intervention played a pivotal role in reuniting us.
Share with other men. JOIN a religious men's group, or you risk integrating an even MORE feminist outlook. You need validation as a man, something NO women can do. Understand hypergamy, and how you move forward from here.
I am 52 and never married; I decided years ago that I had no reason to get married after witnessing the multi-decade "war" my parents were in throughout their marriage (both gone now) and judging by the earlier comments, I made the right move.
I agree..as a boy my parents fought...who needs this!? Who wants this? Whats the point? I'll never marry and continue to come and go as I please...a simple life works for me...Try it guys...who needs the stress women bring? And for what? Everything we need is readily available to us. ..marriage is a prison...who wants that?
Facing difficulties in relationships is normal, but there’s always a path to resolution. My marriage went through tough times, but with the right assistance, my wife and I resolved our issues and enhanced our connection. Solutions exist if you’re willing to work together and persevere. Don’t lose faith-answers are possible.
I’m encountering serious challenges in my relationship and can’t bear the thought of losing her. My love for her is immense, and I miss her deeply. I’m willing to do anything to win her back. I would be extremely grateful for any advice or support you can provide.
Moving on from someone you hold dear is invariably challenging, but in my experience, I was guided by a spiritual counselor who prevented the breakdown of my marriage. Her name is Suzanne Ann Walters.
Thank you for this advice. I'll promptly start searching for her online. I appreciate it. I'm optimistic that pursuing this approach will also lead to favorable outcomes for me; her absence weighs heavily on me.
Don’t fully agree that women deserve all the same rights as men - under the current system. Right now, women want to keep one foot in the traditional past and one in the progressive future. They want the rights, but not the same responsibilities of being equal. The prime example is selective service. Women (and traditional men) have always shot down any attempt to codify requiring women to register.
I didn’t say that it was the best thing to happen. Just that it was inevitable. And you’re right when it comes to responsibilities. There are lots of responsibilities that women have not been settled with that we men have to own. I do believe that the pendulum swings both ways and that it will eventually swing back. Fingers crossed cross.
I'm a fairly traditional man, but I would have no issue of also requiring women to sign up for selective service. They could help fill non-combat positions in the event of us needing to draft citizens to fight a war.
were they really oppressed back then? protected , safe at home with relativly easier work , no obligation to go too war , the priveledge to get of the titanic above men . women have always been the protected sex and men the disposable sex , even now women still don't want to do the tough dirty jobs , they want the top jobs , the CEO jobs , the career jobs , and the feminist movement still wants us to believe that male priveledge is a real thing .
Women only do what is allowed by men. That’s something many men aren’t grasping. As a man, you can refuse to give into women demanding that you play a traditional role and clean up the mess while she takes the benefit. Stop falling for the tricks, problem solved. Yes, they’ll think you’re a woman hater but in reality, you’re simply being logical about “fair treatment and rights”
This intriguing video serves as a poignant reminder of the heartache I've been enduring since my 7-year relationship came to an end 3 months ago. My cherished partner, the love of my life, made the difficult decision to part ways, leaving me consumed by thoughts of her. Despite my earnest attempts to win her back, I find myself facing frustration and an overwhelming sense of emptiness , unable to envision a life without his presence . Despite my efforts to move on, I'm compelled to confess my lingering feelings and longing for him here .
I’m early 30s, do well with attracting women. I am yet to come across a marriageable woman in the US, I definitely blame the culture. They all know what they want, but are clueless about what men want… this is failure on their part
"They all know what they want". Yes, at that current moment and it is usually to have kids. When she hits 40, she will likely no longer want you since you gave her what she wanted at that prior moment, kids, BUT now you will continue to give her what she wants: your kids, your house, half your possessions, child support and very likely alimony.
She wants to outcompete her friends, the holy grail being the house, the kids, never having to work again, and if she perceives herself to be worthy of a better opportunity down the line, (the type of man she actually wanted from the start) she'll take the alimony and child support. They have those figures calculated from the day the guy proposes, if not sooner. Guys who think they can pick out the good, honest ones, are the ones getting caught off guard. What you want isn't ever a consideration for them, once you've signed the contract.
The best relationship is getting together to have fun ( trips dates camping) while still living apart, yet still supporting each other daily and having each others back when needed. Being faithful and trustworthy too. At least thats what works for me. Some people do better in marriage. There are happy couples everywhere.
Yeah. But eventually you start to do more for them than for yourself. That's their whole aim. Like Patrice O'Neal said, "their game is to grow on you".
@@emmaabumere2870 I'm female and we lasted 12 years like this until he started dating someone else, behind my back, and wants to marry her. I found out by accident, otherwise, no telling if I would have been told. secret life. I was loyal. I'm ok tho because no divorce needed, no moving out, no shared bank accounts. I can carryon without extra effort even tho I am sad. Life goes on.
@@emmaabumere2870 well, I'm a female. My boyfriend, after years of living like this, found someone new and ditched me. Plans to marry her. Guess the freedom and happiness got to him. Probably bored. I was left in the dust. Who knew! Can't blame the women for all of it. lol
"A majority of OnlyFans subscribers are not lonely, single men, but married ones, new studies suggest." Wifing up a woman is the fastest and best way to stop the bedroom fun.
It is interesting that there are many men who lie about this, because they want to hide it, so many single men think that in marriage they will have plenty of bedroom fun without much effort. It's just a trap before marriage.
@@bladeedge481 The modern church has no answers for this subject. I recall sitting in a Men's group and witnessing the number of broken-down men who were on the verge of tears because of lack of intimacy in their marriages. The pastor looked befuddled as culture proved to be more powerful than scripture. The truth couldn't be spoken in those Holy halls, for to do so would risk offending half of the congregation.
Excellent video! I had a stable monogamous decent marriage for 25 years and we have wonderful children together. I divorced him because once the kids were grown I was no longer ok w his lack of interest in personal development and his insistence on one min quickies and "sex is only physical, Schahrzad. " So marriage served our purpose of raising kids. ❤ We divorced amicably, no alimony or child support or attorneys! I don't see the need for marriage anymore except for young couples having children. People need to vet their partners very well!
so sorry to hear that-- i hope it goes as smooth as possible-- that is the worst feeling. DO NOT EVER GET MARRIED AGAIN-- THE NEXT ONE WILL BE JUST AS BAD- take it from me-- i used to belive in love being " the next one "-- it is not-- please get some dogs or cats--
@@Blackraptor1234yep its all part of social contract theory, u need to incentivize to have compliant peasants and pawns willing to take orders and having a thriving civilization. The elites fkd up now though with women entering the workforce to generate more servants and didnt foresee that would result in super hypergamy marginalizing men without wives who then check out of the cog in the wheel.
My neighbour told me that his son should be married, and I could not get myself to say congratulation. On the other side I would not tell him what a bad contract he was going into. One of my female colleages was critizising me for not being married to my partner. I became a bit upset why she should interfere in that, and then 1 year later she left her husbond herself.
Our boss told the male employees we should get married to live longer a year later she divorced her husband and put a survey saying how good she was on bed on Facebook.
In college, I did a paper on elderly long term married people. I went to the instructor & complained that I had bad data set. Because all of my data had either grown up together or long time resident in community near each other. My prof laughed & gave me some study papers to look at and pointed out, till end of WW2, and especially in late 60’s, nearly all couples grew up together & in close proximity to each other. And people meeting & marrying strangers was very rare. Romance & tv & movie tropes pushed the bump into stranger & fall in romantic love.
The most tragic figure I ever knew personally was my uncle. He worked very hard, and filled in as a surrogate father after his best friend, my Dad, died young. His sons, my cousins, were flagrantly disrespectful to him. My aunt, Mom’s sister, thought she was smarter than him, but at one point squandered essentially the price of their house. He took it all stoically, except that at one point where he was taking to me alone, he broke down emotionally.
I cancelled my impending wedding to my live in girlfriend. Fortunately I was living at her place so all I had to do was leave. We never communicated ever again after I bailed out. I left because she hid my eyeglasses while drunk, knowing that I’d get pissed off and would leave, but she erroneously thought that by hiding my glasses I’d be defeated and give up. I simply drove to my barbershop at 2:00 AM wearing the prescription sunglasses I kept in my truck.
Yes, but on the flipside, living your 2nd half of life with the wrong mate will make it a living hell and you're likely to die early due to high blood pressure, depression, etc.
I tried to educate a friend about marriage and true female nature. He is getting married soon. He mocked "red pill losers" and thinks guys who get divorced have failed their woman in some way which is why the marriage failed. She has moved into his house 6 months ago with her kid from previous relationship.
Hi John thank you so much for all of your video postings. This is the third or fourth video of yours that I have seen and really listened to closely and could listen to you all day for real from the heart. You are a real inspiration sir for just being able to think about so many different heavy topics from an objective point of view. Going to leave a ramble here and apologize to you and the rest of your other viewers/commentors. Just an opinion, I truly believe that marriage/family and dating dynamics are so bad and really miserable in so many different ways all the while compounded with men being the scape goat of fahmeenesm (misspelled to avoid comment deletion by You Tube) and so many different other aspects of politics that society is in VERY big trouble and in different ways, especially "western" societies. No man can build a life with another person who creates this many liabilities of the modern day "strong and indepent" on top exactly what you described here in this video about people expect marriage to be the solution to any and all problems while expecting your husband or wife to fulfill every single role possible. This is almost engineered with laser precision to guarantee failure. Not most, every single man without exception who I know who is or was married is miserable and/or been divorced ruined and/or only to be get remarried desperately trying to lock in the dream of "the sanctity" of marriage conquers all. Men don't benefit from this anymore while whaomen do. I just tuned 50, never married, no kids and there are many, many people who hate me for it both family, neighbors, and the worst to my surprise of those who show consistent contempt... coworkers. We show up to a job for 8 plus hours a day suffocated by each other's personalities just to do it the next day all the while being taunted about not being married and no kids and according to them, therefore I am "selfish" or a "commitment phobe." The mistake was mine in the first place being open with coworkers about the romance side of life in the first place. Lesson learned and I am dedicated to never disclosing that again with coworkers at any future job. For those of you out there who are dedicated to getting married, I truly wish you success to be some of the few to make it work. God bless and all the best.
The marriages I witnessed at close hand growing up were completely unappealing to me, and yet those same couples questioned my decision to stay single until they gave up in my late 30's. Every husband I saw pushing a shopping cart behind his wife just reinforced my point of view. My high school friend's very religious mom inquired about my status when I was in my 40's, and then told me my decision was selfish. They look out for their own interests as a group, but somehow, can't stand each other at the individual level. Sadly, many who would make a valulable contribution by propogating their genes, are the ones rightly deciding not to, as a result of the laws/culture being what they are, and f-m-le nature being what it is. Ancient philosophers knew this, religious texts knew this, and now more and more men are learning this and sharing it.
Feminism didn't ruin women , it just showed men what they really are . Internet has continued to educate boys And men allowing a great exodus from serfdom
Great video. I think you missed the big one here actually. Human life expectancy was never higher than 32 in any part of the world until the mid 1800s. By 1900, it had increased to 49 in the US. By the year 2000, it had surpassed 80 in some countries. In other words, people simply live MUCH longer than they ever used to. The prospect of marriage, for the vast majority of known human history, made perfect sense. People married before the age of 20, had kids, and by the time their kids were old enough to fend for themselves, they died. Today, the kids grow up and you're still alive. When your kids have kids, you are still alive. When you start experiencing gray hair, wrinkles, menopause, serious health complications that would have been a death sentence in the past; you're still alive. People used to only have to make a marriage last for 10-15 years. Now it's several decades! I just don't think the institution of marriage makes sense over such an insanely long timeframe. Especially not with the way men can appreciate in value over time while women almost always depreciate (in terms of sexual/relationship marketplace value that is).
My grandparents were married happily for 60 years. That's the silent generation. Now a long time to be married is 10-20 years. My first was 10 years, and on my second now 8 years.
That's not really the case. All the stats looking at that are accounting for infant mortality, which until the early-mid twentieth century, was about 50% or even higher depending on circumstances. It started dropping in the industrial age and didn't reach 1% and lower until mid twentieth. Many People were still living well into their 60s, 70s, and even 80s for most of civilized history as long as they survived childhood, barring wars, higher rates of young adults dying from tuberculosis, etc.
@@portraitofman2063 False. The vast majority of people didn't even see 40. Yes there was a large infant mortality but, more importantly, for most of human history, a case of pneumonia or a broken leg could end up being a death sentence. It was only the discovery of germs/bacteria and the importance of sterilization in the late 1800's that made the surgical procedures we take for granted today possible. The discovery of antibiotics in the early 1900's was the other huge puzzle piece. It is not correct to suggest most people lived into their 60s and 70's throughout most of human history. That is totally false. Someone in the 1300's living to the age of 60 was extremely rare.
I think the recent history reflects giving women authority without responsibility (tyranny) and giving men responsibility without authority (slavery). For example, women got the right to vote without any corresponding obligation to register for the selective service, putting themselves at risk of being drafted. Also, women through marriage, get access to a man’s resources, even after the marriage ends so she gets the provisions without any obligation. This was exacerbated by no-fault divorce, which entitled women to a man’s provisions, no matter how badly the woman acted. This happens at the macro scale too. For example, Social Security - men contribute more to it, but because the benefits are regressive, and women live longer, men get disproportionately lower benefits out of it. In fact, a New Zealand study some years ago revealed that net net only men pay taxes. This is because men get less in benefits than they pay in taxes while women get more in benefits than they pay in taxes.
And in countries with taxpayer funded healthcare, guess who sees the doctor 4 times a year for herself vs once in 15 years (often to discuss anti-aging creams, puffy eyes...), uses way more sick days, takes more vacations, retires at the same time as her 5 year older husband if not promptly after the 2nd child from a job where she worked fewer hours... Strangely, none of this came up in decades of whining about the wage gap, just like the failure to invent anything, let alone entire industries, comes up when complaining about the dirth of female CEO's.
This is the most balanced, and well thought out explanation on this nuanced subject. After listening to everything you said I can only say that if we want to fix all this we need to completely overhaul this marriage thing. I mean from the bottom up, meaning first off we need to get rid of the pseudo Christian ceremony which we still practice where the woman wears a white dress, said white dress is supposed to signify a woman’s purity and chastity. I’m saying we need to create a new ceremony with modern rules and modern expectations, we may even need to modify the vows since the majority of people don’t believe in them anyways.
I love the internet. It has enhanced my life greatly. That being said, you could never, ever create a better machine for destroying relationships than Social Media. I'm pretty sure I'll never secure a commited/exclusive relationship (I'll never marry) with a modern woman, because I'd require she shut down all her Social Media profiles, have no male "friends" and no late night "clubbing with the girls."
@@rickdeckardbladerunner2049 I'd prefer logical and pragmatic over insecure, but everyone's entitled to their opinion. That being said, The original Blade Runner and Blade Runner 2049 are two of my favorite movies..smiles!
@@johncarlson6472 Philosophers from 3000 year ago to the 1800's offer a lot of insight into human nature that is disturbing, and in fact, are the foundation for some strict cultural and religious traditions aimed at keeping that nature in check. The end of those traditions started long before social media, which merely revealed that nature, whcih has been spreading through universities and teachers colleges since the 80's. Sociology professors deserve a lot of the blame.
1:20 If the children live with the father, they can still get protection. The only reason why the children are affected is because of the mother's actions afterwards. She will take the children with her as an insurance for her old age. Please do not put the children and the women together for everything. It is a manipulation that has been pushed to force men to protect women regardless of their actions. Marriage has little to no benefit for men, it was used to benefit women.
Agreed. I know a 36 year old man who got baby trapped and now mommy and granny basically don't want anything to do with him. The baby was the goal. I've advised him to go his own way, but of course he's blue pilled and my words sound crazy to him. Oh well.
I understand what you’re saying there. But I think in ancient times, you needed to have women in order to get children. One man could father many children from many women. So I think that’s why they end up getting protected. Whether that’s true today or should be true today is certainly a good debate. I think I would agree that in today’s world women do not need that level of protection and should not get the benefits of legal advantages. Thanks.
@@john-griffin Yes, harems are the natural order of things, but kings allowed men to have wives so they would agree to protect the land, pay the taxes, and go off to battle. But now w-m-n side with the .1% of psychopaths that become high level politicians or divorce lawyers/judges to gain the level of control they've always desired.
10:14 "Let her adore you, maintain control of the emotional aspects of the relationship." I would love to hear more on this. It's such a controversial topic and a slippery slope so I'd love to see your approach.
I had a female religious friend who pushed the idea of marriage. I pointed out that the Bible encourages being single in 1 Corinthians 7:8 . (NLT) “So I say to those who aren’t married - it’s better to stay unmarried just as I am. “
LOL... but I'm careful with those religious drones. Some are adept at Scripture Kung-Fu and could knock you out with clever punches. I just tell them that God is not part of government sanctioned and licensed marriage.
Loyalty in a marriage is a commitment to be faithful and unwavering. The support, the honesty, the trust, despite the hardship. But in times of trial have been missing in modern women.
Men are not being told what marriage really is. Men are not told that signing that marriage license sets her up for life. The laws guarantees she gets the house, land, children, alimony and child support. She gets all of these by default. It's not 50 50, if you count alimony and child support, the man gets nothing and in the hole for 20 years. The divorce judge wants to keep her and the children in the house and the man to pay her way. Now she can sleep with any man on your dime and in your house. It's a horrible contract if you understand what it is meant to do.
I couldn't take pastors seriously growing up given what they were encouraging despite all that you laid out being true in the 80's. Credit though to the lawyers and older gentlemen in the area I worked that all told me to stay single when I just started my career.
Marriage whas designed to secure assets for wealthy families by arranging marriages. Ones the French aristocracy invented courtly love and marriage in the 1800's, the institution whas destined to fail. When you give people the possebility to tie the knot on their own accord, they automaticly have the right to the flipside of the coin, wich is the right to untie the knot whenever they wish to do so. Marriage has no place in the modern world and certainly not in a wealthy man's life.
Stress also changes a woman's hormones, thus altering who she's infatuated with and for how long. Furthermore, people need to look at the effect of chemicals (food and fake-ups) and parasites and their effect on women.
Easy to listen to and understand. Agree that a transition is beginning in society and marriage is a dangerous endeavor, for both sides. But struggling to find an answer when it comes to family. Most of us have the need and want for that love and experience in life. I am grateful for my big family but know it comes at a cost to my parents' happiness. If men and women want to have kids but not get married, are future families destined to be separate and children not know what it's like to have two parents at home? It's not so much divorce but separateness that hurts, causes insecurity and damage. Is marriage the fighting chance that keeps parents committed to the family? Ugh. Seems painful and vulnerable no matter which way you slice it.
It's outdated and not necessary anymore. Plus call me old fashioned but I don't like women having multiple sexual partners before marriage. If marriage is traditional and lots of women still love to want to be married, where have all the pure traditional women gone?
Call a plumber, call a carpenter, call an ironworker call a road worker, if you need anything, anything fixed or built a man will answer the call. Men are drafted into the military. Women sit back and generally enjoy what men have created and they whine about rights. You’re wrong. All one has to do is look around at the world to see it.
Too much stress, too many choices, too much independence, not enough commitment, too expensive to raise children, too much impatience, to much unwillingness to be flexible or compromise, catastrophic financial features of spending in marriage and divorce, too much boredom and work, too much temptation and distraction, too many disappointments with spouse and children, and people change and become too disinterested in one another to keep the marriage beneficial.
I disagree. Any institution that no longer offers incentives to both parties will die. But humans continue to survive and adjust. Marriage is absolutely going to go away but a new version of it will take its place.
@@GBU61 What does marriage not offer women? They can stay and he subsidizes, she can leave and he pays out. She can cheat on her husband w no societal or legal ramifications.....
Sadly, he loses as soon as the contract is signed and solidified within a few years, when she finally feels secure in revealing her true self for the first time, withholding s-x, nagging, demanding, isolating him from his friends and family...
I actually have contempt for most women and I well explain why. They always talk about equality and rights yet they have very few of the responsibilities' that men have. Most women go thru life relying on there viginas. They are not require to be drafted , dont do any of the difficult dirty jobs yet there is no en of dissatisfaction with them but they get to vote same as men.. I have known a few women that I respect and admire but very very few.
I understand why you’re saying the things that you’re saying. But I think you’re generalizing all women as being the same as the worst women. And I think that’s unfair. Maybe you just had experience with some really unfortunate women.
I would approach this from a different perspective. I think monogamous marriage was created to deal with the issues of polygamy and hypergamy. Even in cultures without these institutions, women and children were cared for, but in an arrangement of multiple wives or harems. The main problem monogamous marriage solved was a forced distribution of women across society to mitigate large numbers of unattached sexless men that tend to make war on society, both inward and out.
I’d argue that polygamy can’t keep women and children safe… first, a guy isn’t capable of keeping multiple wives and children safe, secondly - if he dies, a bunch of families will suffer…
^^both of you make good points. At the end of the day, hypergamy is still undefeated. Either stay single or work your tail off and be the best male you can possibly be and TRY to satisfy hypergamy. I'm not a gambling man, but if I choose to gamble, it will be with a woman who grew up in a third-world country with a moral family
Monogamous marriage is the foundation of society. It allows a woman to pair bond with her husband for life. It prevents STDs. It gives a man a vested interest in building the society for his wife and heirs. It channels a man's enormous energy into positive pursuits. It gives the wife and children protection and the kids self-esteem. The father then teaches kids values and discipline.
@@djaeger-k5m polygamy has been the most common social arrangement from the dawn of time, across most cultures. With the arrival of Judeo/Christian culture in Europe, the first mass appearance of monogamous marriage arrangement occurred, primarily pushed by the Catholic Church. Without a doubt, this led to a more stable society and better outcomes overall. However, it doesn’t follow that polygamous cultures could not care for women and children. In fact, modern polygamous cultures exist that continue to do so. Take note of the fact that hypergamy drives women to seek the highest quality and most capable mates. Men without the capacity to care for multiple wives and children would not find themselves blessed with the benefit and responsibility of such.
A couple of years ago, I was acquainted with a man who had been left absolutely destitute after his divorce. He said he'd lived out of his car for 18 months. He went to the bathroom at Wal Mart and took showers at truck stops. I can't imagine how horrible that must have been. I resolved that would *NOT* happen to me. I'll never get married; no way.
@@txlyons2937 The only men I've known who weren't taken to the cleaners in divorce settlements: 1. Had nothing 2. Their assets were protected-in their family's name, e.g.
so the marriage system in countries like India and Pakistan is proven to be perfect. Divorce rate is 1% in India. They don't give women too much choice to pick life partner which seems quite strange but it works really well. Both partner enter into marriage with their roles very clear and it works.
This information is dated. It might have still been largely true when I traveled there in 2000 but what you wrote is no longer correct. Social media and feminism’s tentacles reach into many parts of India. Maybe some rural areas still are the way you describe, but do you really want to marry an Indian village girl?
30% of the planet are muzlimms..they dont allow theirxx to behave like in the W and they are brought up in a traditional way with the male family members keeping an eye on them
I see tons of Indian men swearing off marriage on yt comments… apparently their laws are worse and there’s false accusations flying left, right and center… even their Supreme Court is warning women about it apparently
I am a fluent English speaker I wish you added an English subtitle so I would be able to improve my vocabulary as I learn English to be an advanced one and also I learn lessons in life from you as well.
I've never been interested in marriage since I was a kid. It's like I instinctively knew that it wasn't for me. So, I never really invested much into it and have been living my life pretty free from drama and risk.
I agree the concept of marriage has really gone down the drain, and that marriage is a risky proposition as well as the issues that are present with women. I think that we all need to come back down to reality especially women. Women can "choose to be" single for right now, but when they get older and on their deathbed, they'll wish they made better decisions in their life, but it's too late by then. However, I really feel that people need to learn to go back to understanding how relationships between two people is supposed to be, since a lot of people don't understand what a proper relationship really even is these days. If your seeking a woman, your best bet would be to seek out someone who wants to build a relationship together with you, whose there through the rough and the good times, and someone who you can enjoy /spend time with, and you have to seek this out through a logical lens and not through an emotional one. And really take your time to get to know her, before even considering marriage. If she's the type of woman who understands you , and gives you the time that you need to build a relationship with her, then you have someone good. If you guys fight and she's always trying to talk it out and changes for you to make the relationship work, then you have someone good. If she wants to work together with you on things, then you have someone good. It is her "qualities" that we are to seek and not just her looks. If she has nice things to say behind your back then you have someone good. Once you have fully established these things with her, then you can perhaps take on the topic of marriage. I'm not saying that what I said is 100% foolproof at all, but it lowers the risk of the relationship falling apart, and finding a woman with good qualities is harder these days, but not impossible. I say to enjoy life for time being. Have some fun, and do the things that you always wanted to do. Focus on your goals and try to enjoy your life. Go out and maybe meet people or do things that you enjoy. Be open to the possibility that someone good could along. That's all we can do for now.
John, in case you don't know, there is actually a movie called "Caveman" starting Ringo Starr and Barbara Bach where she is with the biggest baddest caveman and Ringo wants to win her over. It's really a very funny film so it's worth watching just from the humour point of view though also from the point of view of "laydees have always been like this".
@@john-griffin Given you are my age and grew up with beatles music all around you like I did. You will love it I am sure. I laughed my A off during that movie and wondered how they ever got Ringo to do it. I am guess Barbara Bach has something to do with it. She was very hot in those days.
Marriage has been and always will be about economics and the exchange of services Men provide food/physical security and women provide children and sex As any society brings to grow, marriage is a necessary element in order to keep society stable If you have to many men with no access to women (which we have today) they will violent and often reek havoc and if you have to many women without husbands they become a burden on society’s limited resources Marriage was created for social and economic stability and not love
Good information could you do a video on the man marrying to have kids where she becomes their friend and the father is the boundary and rules maker, and in the end when divorced the kids stay her buddy and distances themselves from the father. Thanks for the great videos.
This is a fascinating subject. Every day in central Cali I see hover-moms bringing their celebrated “buddy” (their word, not mine) into clinic while a piece-of-furniture father tries to exhibit some relevance. Exaggerated respect paid to the little prince/princess is proportional to the lack of regard for the man. This is the norm, not the exception, though some religious communities such as the Sikhs are excepted.
Social transitions can be quick and painless or they can be slow and destructive. Unfortunately, it is likely that hundreds of millions of western men will still get caught in the meat grinder of a dying social model.
Dutch Treat Dating is the only way to roll as an adult male. She must put skin in the game or basically fair play. Keep in mind she's making an income most likely more than you!
Good luck with that. Because of dating apps & social media, any half-way decent looking woman is getting bombarded by the simps who will say or do anything to date her. 🤣
It's definitely a class thing. I'm in England. So, the middle classes, professional classes etc are still marrying as usual. The working classes are not, and this is detrimental mostly I would argue to working class women. I'm lucky, I've worked my way up without marriage or children, and I'm working class, so I know I'm an enigma in this sense. Most girls I knew from high school ended up single mums, which is a hard life, and too hard a path for me to go down, despite always wanting children. Life is crazy now. Marriage is good for both sexes, I think, by and large. Peace and love 💕
I agree that the transition we are in has to end at some point. I sometimes think about what that is going to look like. I personally think society is in trouble from a number of things and there is going to be a great big crash at some point that is going to set everything back to a traditional kind of situation... when will it happen ?... I'm not sure but I don't think we are very far away..10-20 years unless something drastic happens. I understand others might have a different opinion what will take place and I'm interested in hearing it.
I think artificial intelligence might be the catalyst. If the need for workers shrinks dramatically, then the only way to create balance will be to shrink the workforce. While at the same time, wanting to prop up population numbers, it might be beneficial for government to intervene by, incentivizing higher birth rates. That may force us into a more traditional nuclear family again. One where there is a single breadwinner and one parent in charge of raising children. I could be wrong, but it’s a possible outcome.
@@john-griffin interesting I hadn't considered the AI aspect. I don't think anything were the government gets involved is going to work would be my difference... everything they get involved in...they screw it up
Friendship is better than isolation imho, so both sexes will support each other as the world darkens......when poverty begins to steal dreams away from credit ridden modern people.....both sexes will work together again...
Look to Japan. They are the clear forerunner of a high technological society with high debt. Marriage rates are at the lowest. Ultimately it appears that in a high technology, egalitarian society marriage is essentially useless as a form of relational interaction between a man and woman. Ironically, that puts us back to square one: marriage is only for the care and rearing of children. None of this soul mate BS, love BS, or friend BS.
I meet alot of married men and non can totally convince me to get married besides the acclaimed benefit of having kids to care for you when you're old and companionship. I've found my way around that and made my peace with it.
Then: marriage, wife, house, children
Now: marriage, divorce, lose wife, lose house, lose children
The social engineers and mass media (the tools) are teaching women the "now" you described. What's going down isn't by mistake.
Now but 5 min later: no marriage, situationship, women stop listening and starting to create problems after 3 years, end of situationship, new situationship, repeat -> and if you want children - go to country that will protect your rights - ergo only patriarchal ones. This will reach all countries - but different countries will be changing rules slowly - ergo you have to think like with setting up company. Once you are earning enough you move to tax heaven and setup structure. I figured after last situationship where after 3/4 years girl went delulu that no more longer then 1 year relationships in EU, central europe, eastern europe (same shit) -> I'm only going into relationship in country that in case of divorce I will get full parenting rights as I have more money. there are few. And as I want children - thats only rational desicision to do as In EU after 10 years some delulu women will start braking their future. And I cannot allow that - have to be prepared to become single father in 10 years as thats seems to be situation - so have to be in position and country where I will win full parenting rights fast and without problems - and if delulu one will want to go - she can - without money, children and support. :) So no marriage in the west. ;) Definitevely don't buying the "partner" etc. shit - it exists only in disney movies and TV - modern women are lost possibility to be trustworhy partner.
There’s always trade offs in life
@@marty906 exactly. Marriage is no longer a vow. Laydees feel free to end a marriage for any reason including no reason at all. Marriage is dead.
@@PeterNolan-009That is what it has become. High risk to allow another to have this control over your life.
Marriage is a very high reward/low risk for women. But for men it’s a high risk/low reward.
My mum took a chance on my father. He turned out to be a violent drunk. After a divorce where she lost her share of the marital home but got custody, she then married a kind widower who turned out to be a lazy sponger. At 45, she told people who asked her if she planned to marry again, “no!” I guess those marriages were not that rewarding.
@@jamescorbett5729there are always rare exclusions from the rule
Men who were sleazes used to be able to get away with this, this probably happened in the 80s or 90s or latest early 2000s. After Internet became more advanced women gained the upper hand and now you can see the stats show an overwhelming majority of divorces are initiated by women with the law favouring her mostly now. My parents were also like yours and got married around 1990. They are divorced by a mile now and we the children are left with this reality and the much darker fate of the future of long term and committed relationships.
No, marriage is the worst kind of risk for women. We risk way more than our male counterparts.
@@alridgeace8912Thank goodness for the internet, where we can share our stories. Ladies, protect yourself.
I WAS TOLD THIS 30 YEARS AGO, BUT LIKE A YOUNG FOOL I HAD TO SEE 4MYSELF...MARRIAGE IS THE WORST CONTRACT A MAN COULD EVER ENTER.😢
and they keep wondering where the good men are hiding? lost everything once, why the hell would i sign up for a 2nd round of that?
Really they should call it a donation because that what it is.
Marriage is only for the bl00p€€s today.
the same for woman
At best, it's the "F"ing you get for the "F"ing you got.😮😢
You marry the government not her
@@JediDarkForce This is a good point. If we didn’t need to have a 3rd party intervening in relations more men might be interested in marriage.
@@PureYang0 Seen enough divorced men comment they're much happpier without her and should have paid earlier to be done with them. F=m-le nature , the games, the lies, the manipulation, nagging, entitement etc is always there, even if the gov't doesn't impair your ability to keep iti check. You'd also need stirct social and religious traditions on your side as some countries have figured out. They understand what would happen if they gave an inch.
My arrogant, deceased brother-in-law said i didn't know what i was talking about when i said he would regret marrying my sister. His increased alcohol and tobacco use contributed tonhis death at only 54 and there's no doubt the stress of living with my sister has a lot to do with it.
nobody ever listens anyways, but at least you told him. was your sister a narcissists by chance? or just a foul human being? maybe both?
Definitely both!
I have a witch of a sister too.
This is profound. Our mothers are no exception. But you dare not say it. Happy Mother's Day...are they really happy?
@@emmaabumere2870 most mothers are horrible, I’ve seen it, and I’ve experienced it myself
Knowing how men get treated in the court system is another reason why men avoid getting married.
they knew this would happen when they set the rules
My uncle's wife divorced him and got everything. The paper put her maiden name as his last name
My mom read it and said they even took his name from him.
It is only good that men avoid getting married, if marriage doesn't suit them. Women don't want to marry men who don't want to be married to women. Nobody should be forced to become married or stay married. Just make sure to have prenups if you feel insecure about the money and assets you owned before marriage - and remember the children are as much both of yours, so the courts will always keep you responsible for them. Never let your wife go without an income of her own.
If a man doesn't want to marry a woman because she's not pretty enough or she isn't his type many of them will try to trap him if he's good looking or rich. As for pre nups check with a lawyer first because they can be thrown out but I'm my state a man needs to buy his house first and not intermingle their money.
@@DNA350ppm Prenups routinely get tossed out to the point they are practically useless. Also, " Never let your wife go without an income of her own." Why? I thought she was strong and independent. If she wants a divorce, she should also expect a separation from any financial assistance aside from child support.
Marriage is over. Laydees killed it.
good job strong, and independents. they destroy everything they come in contact with. just like narcissists do.
But men set the laws in place that incentivize women to leave marriages with no fault.
Laydees didn't kill it...B***hes killed it. Not all women are B***hes all the time.
More specifically circa 2007 and the advent of the 'smart phone', dating apps, and social media exponential growth killed it for men. Women suddenly didn't have to wait to be approached but had 100s of suitors daily begging them for attention. This created an inflated self-worth and eventually, narcissism in most women. Marriage? Don't be ridiculous.
No man current day with more than two brain cells would give that a second thought in 2024+.
Modern women define themselves with masculine traits now. So there are men with male genitalia and female genitalia. They are combative, not cooperative. Don't marry.
there are no benefits for a man to marry. the only two outcomes are eternal misery, divorce. whats killing them is, no marriage = no more transfer of funds, or divorce ra pe.
Men are society’s sla ves.
A third outcome is death but you're 100% right.
@@mrwillwgp forgot death. lol
What I find hilarious is how on earth in 2024 men is not using their logical brains and realizing Marriage is literally a contract that includes a third party (the government) in it allows a third party INTO your relationship and gives the third party power, Why on earth would you do that???? Do men know you can actually have companionship without it?? Woman practice hypergamy so yes they want you to sign the contract with government, Ask yourself if your Woman made more money than you would you require them to sign a contract to be with you??? Woman don’t love you.
My grandmother tortured my grandfather until his heart gave out at 59. The Germans couldn't kill him but my grandmother did.
After separation and toxic relationship with my toxic wife for 16 years I become introvert... I'am 44 years old male... I live solo life and become introvert 🤗 I love my single little rustic cabin in the near by Oregon forest... I decided to escape from my existence city life to different reality to connect with nature and simplicity where I feel like myself again😃✨...I love traveling alone to the new fresh places outdoors...love nature mountains... hiking... I like so much grilling by the lake in open fire fresh Sea foods like fish, beef with vegetables and enjoying warm fireplace at the same time.. IAM enjoying simple moments in present.... Catching fresh breath of salty breeze... feeling gentle wind in my face 🌬️🌊🍃....IAM away from city and negativity... away from rude people and nonsense.....I finally find myself surrounded in the pure tranquility and pacification vibe....in the nature by myself Iam feel like myself ...it's ultimate peace of mind and positive energy.. gives you joy, happiness and purpose to live life this way🤗😃🤙✨🍄🍃🌾🌱🌿☘️🍀🌳🌲⛰️🏞️
Sounds really nice! 👍
a mere 200yrs ago we needed one another just to survive. today, all that is needed is me, and money.
Wait until these people find out what "their" "money" is really worth...
@@mpclepto182 oh boy! they have no clue.
Do not get married
Marriage is an instrument that most people in the modern age can’t play and shouldn’t play
Women want the attention and validation of a WEDDING. They soon realize after they don't want to be married. Hypergamy kicks in and within days MOST are thinking "what have I done, I can do better!!"
Agreed!!
I have no expectations of marriage, I just know that I’ll never go there again!
i lost everything, and ny kids. no thanks.
Marriage is just another hookup.
@@kengaroo5170- unfortunately, it’s a little more complicated than that and will literally strip you of your assets and wealth when she inevitably becomes bored with you!
Not everyone is meant to be married. Just like not everyone is meant to be a parent. Some parents suck at it and mess up their kids’ lives. Not everyone is meant to be a pet owner. Same reasons. Unfortunately, some people get married young and are not mature enough for the hard work and mature problem solving that marriage often entails. When I doubt, stay single.
Amen
77, Married for 5 Years & Divorced At 32. On My Own Ever Since & Happy As Can Be.
This man is a poet, a philosopher and a king. Thank you John
Thanks
How do you slow population growth without anyone even realizing it? Empower women (even to the point of absurdity) but say it's about equality.
And give them birth control
beautifully put..add free term....... and noFD
and u seal the deal
This is something he has not uncovered yet. The wisest men that ever walked this earth understood that empowering women will always leed to the same thing...bigger governments, socialism, tyranny and societal collapse. There is no way around this. We just need enough strong men that understand this when the bad times come, so we can re-assert, and let the weak men die or cry. "Once made equal to men women become his superior".
Population control.
@@shawnrampton2749 I wish more people were cognizant of this and the OP's statement.
Family court, counselors, CPS, child support cash flows going to the state, forensic accountants, custody evaluators…the ticks weigh more than the dog.
Well said. I'll use it. Thanks.
Well women as a whole vote for Communist style programs. So its not Equality, but essentially loss of Freedom that men gave their lives for to secure, that has now been voted away by the Hive Mind that women embrace. There is no righting this ship until men realize that another war will take place to restore what has been lost. Something like 90% of all Government Assistant Programs go towards women, think about it and get back to me...
That’s great! The ticks were more than the dog. I have never heard that before. I like it.
❤ true
Exactimon
It is the worst business contract a man could sign, yet many continue to fall for the okie doke. 😳
so let them fall, and learn the hard way. just dont be one of them.
10% of them works
@@vinipcplayer less than that.
@@lilfairycupcake
And even far less than that are happily 😊 married. Misery loves ❤️ company. 🤓
@@alphaomega1351 both my brothers live in misery 24/7. f that.
I will never forget the hate filled eyes that shown across the courtroom at me when the judge asked both parties, “Is there any way to save this marriage?” Over 21 years marriage plus two years of dating. That was the most poignant moment.
👍
@@WildMidwest1 my guess is that the hatred was because "You had one job!: Make me happy! AND YOU FAILED! YOU WASTED MY TIME!" How dare you?!
That hits hard. Really hard.
@@pugsymalone6539Best summary ever.
@WildMidwest1 I'm sorry for you, Brother. I hope things are better now. I booted my last and final one recently. Going to keep it just me and the dog. Monk Pug for the win. Good luck to you, man.
Sadly modern society has exposed women's true nature, selfish and lustful. She never loves you only how you make her feel and by what you can provide.
I wish someone taught me this when I was young...
It's not just that, it's the whole redpill book of knowledge. Most people I know and meet are still bluepill. When I was going through the divorce process in 1998 to 2001, I was utterly clueless about the truth of female nature. Ten years ago I remember hearing a few redpill pioneers but couldn't take it all in. A few years later I finally properly understood how paradoxically contemporary "marriage'" destroys more than it makes, from your average man's perspective. I could forgive myself for the annihilation and suffering I'd cluelessly inflicted on myself by marriage. It's as dumb as signing up to fight an Oligarch's war with delusions of patriotism, yada, yada.
I think religion was created, in part, to pin down and control the wanton, wild woman.
Inschmels are so funny.
ignore the silly 81TcH who desperately tried to insulted you in the other comment
Only if men allow them to. You don’t have to succumb to a woman demanding your provisions and tingles
This captivating video triggers a flood of painful memories from the end of my 6 year relationship just three months ago. The woman I loved with all my heart chose to walk away, leaving me grappling with an insurmountable sense of loss. Despite my relentless efforts to salvage what we had, I'm left feeling disillusioned and unable to imagine a future without her. Despite my attempts to move on, I'm drawn to express my deep-seated longing for her here.
The struggle to release someone dear to your heart is undeniably arduous. I empathize, having experienced a similar circumstance when my 8-year relationship concluded. Refusing to accept defeat, I pursued every conceivable avenue to reclaim his affection. Eventually, I sought the assistance of a spiritual counselor, whose wisdom and intervention played a pivotal role in reuniting us.
That's fascinating! How did you come across a spiritual counselor, and what's the best way for me to contact her?
Suzanne Ann Walters is the name of an exceptional spiritual counselor renowned for her ability to reunite you with your former partner.
Thank you for this valuable information.
Share with other men. JOIN a religious men's group, or you risk integrating an even MORE feminist outlook. You need validation as a man, something NO women can do. Understand hypergamy, and how you move forward from here.
I am 52 and never married; I decided years ago that I had no reason to get married after witnessing the multi-decade "war" my parents were in throughout their marriage (both gone now) and judging by the earlier comments, I made the right move.
Smart not to go through 3 divorces to find out.😅
I agree..as a boy my parents fought...who needs this!? Who wants this? Whats the point? I'll never marry and continue to come and go as I please...a simple life works for me...Try it guys...who needs the stress women bring? And for what? Everything we need is readily available to us.
..marriage is a prison...who wants that?
My dysfunctional family, and my mentally ill mother in particular influenced my decision to remain single. Why perpetuate such a destructive custom?
That's right (young) men, NEVER marry!!! Avoid it at all costs.
Facing difficulties in relationships is normal, but there’s always a path to resolution. My marriage went through tough times, but with the right assistance, my wife and I resolved our issues and enhanced our connection. Solutions exist if you’re willing to work together and persevere. Don’t lose faith-answers are possible.
I’m encountering serious challenges in my relationship and can’t bear the thought of losing her. My love for her is immense, and I miss her deeply. I’m willing to do anything to win her back. I would be extremely grateful for any advice or support you can provide.
Moving on from someone you hold dear is invariably challenging, but in my experience, I was guided by a spiritual counselor who prevented the breakdown of my marriage. Her name is Suzanne Ann Walters.
Thank you for this advice. I'll promptly start searching for her online. I appreciate it. I'm optimistic that pursuing this approach will also lead to favorable outcomes for me; her absence weighs heavily on me.
Welcome
Bot comment for a "spiritual advisor".
Don’t fully agree that women deserve all the same rights as men - under the current system. Right now, women want to keep one foot in the traditional past and one in the progressive future. They want the rights, but not the same responsibilities of being equal. The prime example is selective service. Women (and traditional men) have always shot down any attempt to codify requiring women to register.
You are correct sir.
I didn’t say that it was the best thing to happen. Just that it was inevitable. And you’re right when it comes to responsibilities. There are lots of responsibilities that women have not been settled with that we men have to own. I do believe that the pendulum swings both ways and that it will eventually swing back. Fingers crossed cross.
I'm a fairly traditional man, but I would have no issue of also requiring women to sign up for selective service. They could help fill non-combat positions in the event of us needing to draft citizens to fight a war.
were they really oppressed back then? protected , safe at home with relativly easier work , no obligation to go too war , the priveledge to get of the titanic above men .
women have always been the protected sex and men the disposable sex , even now women still don't want to do the tough dirty jobs , they want the top jobs , the CEO jobs , the career jobs , and the feminist movement still wants us to believe that male priveledge is a real thing .
Women only do what is allowed by men. That’s something many men aren’t grasping. As a man, you can refuse to give into women demanding that you play a traditional role and clean up the mess while she takes the benefit. Stop falling for the tricks, problem solved. Yes, they’ll think you’re a woman hater but in reality, you’re simply being logical about “fair treatment and rights”
This intriguing video serves as a poignant reminder of the heartache I've been enduring since my 7-year relationship came to an end 3 months ago. My cherished partner, the love of my life, made the difficult decision to part ways, leaving me consumed by thoughts of her. Despite my earnest attempts to win her back, I find myself facing frustration and an overwhelming sense of emptiness , unable to envision a life without his presence . Despite my efforts to move on, I'm compelled to confess my lingering feelings and longing for him here .
Impressive! How did you manage to connect with a spiritual counselor, and what's the process for me to reach out to her?
Thank you for this invaluable information; I've just checked her out online.
As for me I decided to do my best as a man and embrace my freedom
I’m early 30s, do well with attracting women. I am yet to come across a marriageable woman in the US, I definitely blame the culture. They all know what they want, but are clueless about what men want… this is failure on their part
"Do well with attracting women" = Oxymoron
"They all know what they want". Yes, at that current moment and it is usually to have kids. When she hits 40, she will likely no longer want you since you gave her what she wanted at that prior moment, kids, BUT now you will continue to give her what she wants: your kids, your house, half your possessions, child support and very likely alimony.
She wants to outcompete her friends, the holy grail being the house, the kids, never having to work again, and if she perceives herself to be worthy of a better opportunity down the line, (the type of man she actually wanted from the start) she'll take the alimony and child support. They have those figures calculated from the day the guy proposes, if not sooner. Guys who think they can pick out the good, honest ones, are the ones getting caught off guard. What you want isn't ever a consideration for them, once you've signed the contract.
The best relationship is getting together to have fun ( trips dates camping) while still living apart, yet still supporting each other daily and having each others back when needed. Being faithful and trustworthy too. At least thats what works for me. Some people do better in marriage. There are happy couples everywhere.
Yeah. But eventually you start to do more for them than for yourself. That's their whole aim. Like Patrice O'Neal said, "their game is to grow on you".
@@emmaabumere2870 I'm female and we lasted 12 years like this until he started dating someone else, behind my back, and wants to marry her. I found out by accident, otherwise, no telling if I would have been told. secret life. I was loyal. I'm ok tho because no divorce needed, no moving out, no shared bank accounts. I can carryon without extra effort even tho I am sad. Life goes on.
@@emmaabumere2870 well, I'm a female. My boyfriend, after years of living like this, found someone new and ditched me. Plans to marry her. Guess the freedom and happiness got to him. Probably bored. I was left in the dust. Who knew! Can't blame the women for all of it. lol
"A majority of OnlyFans subscribers are not lonely, single men, but married ones, new studies suggest."
Wifing up a woman is the fastest and best way to stop the bedroom fun.
It is interesting that there are many men who lie about this, because they want to hide it, so many single men think that in marriage they will have plenty of bedroom fun without much effort. It's just a trap before marriage.
@@bladeedge481 The modern church has no answers for this subject. I recall sitting in a Men's group and witnessing the number of broken-down men who were on the verge of tears because of lack of intimacy in their marriages. The pastor looked befuddled as culture proved to be more powerful than scripture. The truth couldn't be spoken in those Holy halls, for to do so would risk offending half of the congregation.
Half of the congregation being women I bet totally turned me off from women
You must be a married man! You’re absolutely right.
@@bladeedge481 They don't care what men want. They just want your resources and labor.
Excellent video! I had a stable monogamous decent marriage for 25 years and we have wonderful children together. I divorced him because once the kids were grown I was no longer ok w his lack of interest in personal development and his insistence on one min quickies and "sex is only physical, Schahrzad. " So marriage served our purpose of raising kids. ❤ We divorced amicably, no alimony or child support or attorneys! I don't see the need for marriage anymore except for young couples having children. People need to vet their partners very well!
I’m glad you enjoyed the video. I think more and more people are seeing marriage the same way you describe it
I think most men would take that deal if they where happy most of the time and they got married before age 28.
I’m finding out right now with my divorce starting it just isn’t worth it.
so sorry to hear that-- i hope it goes as smooth as possible-- that is the worst feeling. DO NOT EVER GET MARRIED AGAIN-- THE NEXT ONE WILL BE JUST AS BAD- take it from me-- i used to belive in love being " the next one "-- it is not-- please get some dogs or cats--
@@Blackraptor1234 a couple people did but no one warmed me about all sides of what happens.
@@johnelder-hh3ix I agree
Sorry to hear. Stay strong brother.
The first Simp Caveman probably raised Biggest Baddest Caveman's kid, and he didn't know that.
Still happening today why do you think women are so vocal against paternity tests.
You’re probably right! That’s hilarious but true
Best comment ever 😂😂😂
@@Blackraptor1234yep its all part of social contract theory, u need to incentivize to have compliant peasants and pawns willing to take orders and having a thriving civilization. The elites fkd up now though with women entering the workforce to generate more servants and didnt foresee that would result in super hypergamy marginalizing men without wives who then check out of the cog in the wheel.
@@Blackraptor1234 marriage comes with trade and agriculture and surplus. Sacralized by religion.
My neighbour told me that his son should be married, and I could not get myself to say congratulation. On the other side I would not tell him what a bad contract he was going into. One of my female colleages was critizising me for not being married to my partner. I became a bit upset why she should interfere in that, and then 1 year later she left her husbond herself.
Our boss told the male employees we should get married to live longer a year later she divorced her husband and put a survey saying how good she was on bed on Facebook.
In college, I did a paper on elderly long term married people. I went to the instructor & complained that I had bad data set. Because all of my data had either grown up together or long time resident in community near each other. My prof laughed & gave me some study papers to look at and pointed out, till end of WW2, and especially in late 60’s, nearly all couples grew up together & in close proximity to each other. And people meeting & marrying strangers was very rare. Romance & tv & movie tropes pushed the bump into stranger & fall in romantic love.
One of the most thought provoking videos on this topic.Thank you for your time.
The most tragic figure I ever knew personally was my uncle. He worked very hard, and filled in as a surrogate father after his best friend, my Dad, died young. His sons, my cousins, were flagrantly disrespectful to him. My aunt, Mom’s sister, thought she was smarter than him, but at one point squandered essentially the price of their house. He took it all stoically, except that at one point where he was taking to me alone, he broke down emotionally.
I cancelled my impending wedding to my live in girlfriend. Fortunately I was living at her place so all I had to do was leave. We never communicated ever again after I bailed out. I left because she hid my eyeglasses while drunk, knowing that I’d get pissed off and would leave, but she erroneously thought that by hiding my glasses I’d be defeated and give up. I simply drove to my barbershop at 2:00 AM wearing the prescription sunglasses I kept in my truck.
What a troll you are.
Good video John. I ran across your channel a couple of weeks ago....im glad i did. Thank you.
Thanks for the sub!
You have heard it said "dating is dead" but I say unto you Marriage is dead.
Living the 2nd half of life alone sucks though, so finding a good mate can be huge for the end of life when your health starts breaking down.
Yes, but on the flipside, living your 2nd half of life with the wrong mate will make it a living hell and you're likely to die early due to high blood pressure, depression, etc.
Dog or cat could help with that. Or have a girlfriend. Nothing wrong with that
I tried to educate a friend about marriage and true female nature. He is getting married soon.
He mocked "red pill losers" and thinks guys who get divorced have failed their woman in some way which is why the marriage failed.
She has moved into his house 6 months ago with her kid from previous relationship.
your friend is toast
marrying a single mom? Oh boy, he’s gonna get whipped and then lash out at the world cause he was foolish enough to not understand logic
You tried. He will learn the hard way.
Hi John thank you so much for all of your video postings. This is the third or fourth video of yours that I have seen and really listened to closely and could listen to you all day for real from the heart. You are a real inspiration sir for just being able to think about so many different heavy topics from an objective point of view. Going to leave a ramble here and apologize to you and the rest of your other viewers/commentors.
Just an opinion, I truly believe that marriage/family and dating dynamics are so bad and really miserable in so many different ways all the while compounded with men being the scape goat of fahmeenesm (misspelled to avoid comment deletion by You Tube) and so many different other aspects of politics that society is in VERY big trouble and in different ways, especially "western" societies.
No man can build a life with another person who creates this many liabilities of the modern day "strong and indepent" on top exactly what you described here in this video about people expect marriage to be the solution to any and all problems while expecting your husband or wife to fulfill every single role possible. This is almost engineered with laser precision to guarantee failure.
Not most, every single man without exception who I know who is or was married is miserable and/or been divorced ruined and/or only to be get remarried desperately trying to lock in the dream of "the sanctity" of marriage conquers all. Men don't benefit from this anymore while whaomen do.
I just tuned 50, never married, no kids and there are many, many people who hate me for it both family, neighbors, and the worst to my surprise of those who show consistent contempt... coworkers.
We show up to a job for 8 plus hours a day suffocated by each other's personalities just to do it the next day all the while being taunted about not being married and no kids and according to them, therefore I am "selfish" or a "commitment phobe."
The mistake was mine in the first place being open with coworkers about the romance side of life in the first place. Lesson learned and I am dedicated to never disclosing that again with coworkers at any future job.
For those of you out there who are dedicated to getting married, I truly wish you success to be some of the few to make it work. God bless and all the best.
Great insights! Thanks
The marriages I witnessed at close hand growing up were completely unappealing to me, and yet those same couples questioned my decision to stay single until they gave up in my late 30's. Every husband I saw pushing a shopping cart behind his wife just reinforced my point of view.
My high school friend's very religious mom inquired about my status when I was in my 40's, and then told me my decision was selfish. They look out for their own interests as a group, but somehow, can't stand each other at the individual level.
Sadly, many who would make a valulable contribution by propogating their genes, are the ones rightly deciding not to, as a result of the laws/culture being what they are, and f-m-le nature being what it is. Ancient philosophers knew this, religious texts knew this, and now more and more men are learning this and sharing it.
@@csn10 i agree with all you said 100% and that bit too about them calling you "selfish" They always use that word in this context.
You have a great grasp of the subject and earned wisdom too, and a pretty good gift of being able to speak your truth. Thanks!
I appreciate that!
Feminism didn't ruin women , it just showed men what they really are . Internet has continued to educate boys And men allowing a great exodus from serfdom
Great video. I think you missed the big one here actually. Human life expectancy was never higher than 32 in any part of the world until the mid 1800s. By 1900, it had increased to 49 in the US. By the year 2000, it had surpassed 80 in some countries. In other words, people simply live MUCH longer than they ever used to. The prospect of marriage, for the vast majority of known human history, made perfect sense. People married before the age of 20, had kids, and by the time their kids were old enough to fend for themselves, they died. Today, the kids grow up and you're still alive. When your kids have kids, you are still alive. When you start experiencing gray hair, wrinkles, menopause, serious health complications that would have been a death sentence in the past; you're still alive. People used to only have to make a marriage last for 10-15 years. Now it's several decades! I just don't think the institution of marriage makes sense over such an insanely long timeframe. Especially not with the way men can appreciate in value over time while women almost always depreciate (in terms of sexual/relationship marketplace value that is).
You are exactly right! Marriages that lasted 20 years were lifelong. Now, they are just long enough to make you wish you were dead!
My grandparents were married happily for 60 years. That's the silent generation. Now a long time to be married is 10-20 years. My first was 10 years, and on my second now 8 years.
Your grandparents were friends companions for that long.....very different
That's not really the case. All the stats looking at that are accounting for infant mortality, which until the early-mid twentieth century, was about 50% or even higher depending on circumstances. It started dropping in the industrial age and didn't reach 1% and lower until mid twentieth. Many People were still living well into their 60s, 70s, and even 80s for most of civilized history as long as they survived childhood, barring wars, higher rates of young adults dying from tuberculosis, etc.
@@portraitofman2063 False. The vast majority of people didn't even see 40. Yes there was a large infant mortality but, more importantly, for most of human history, a case of pneumonia or a broken leg could end up being a death sentence. It was only the discovery of germs/bacteria and the importance of sterilization in the late 1800's that made the surgical procedures we take for granted today possible. The discovery of antibiotics in the early 1900's was the other huge puzzle piece. It is not correct to suggest most people lived into their 60s and 70's throughout most of human history. That is totally false. Someone in the 1300's living to the age of 60 was extremely rare.
I think the recent history reflects giving women authority without responsibility (tyranny) and giving men responsibility without authority (slavery). For example, women got the right to vote without any corresponding obligation to register for the selective service, putting themselves at risk of being drafted. Also, women through marriage, get access to a man’s resources, even after the marriage ends so she gets the provisions without any obligation. This was exacerbated by no-fault divorce, which entitled women to a man’s provisions, no matter how badly the woman acted. This happens at the macro scale too. For example, Social Security - men contribute more to it, but because the benefits are regressive, and women live longer, men get disproportionately lower benefits out of it. In fact, a New Zealand study some years ago revealed that net net only men pay taxes. This is because men get less in benefits than they pay in taxes while women get more in benefits than they pay in taxes.
It’s even worse than just living longer… there’s 1000s of female shelters, single mum programs etc… none of these benefits for men…
Wow, what a great comment! I’m really great information. Thanks for sharing it.
And in countries with taxpayer funded healthcare, guess who sees the doctor 4 times a year for herself vs once in 15 years (often to discuss anti-aging creams, puffy eyes...), uses way more sick days, takes more vacations, retires at the same time as her 5 year older husband if not promptly after the 2nd child from a job where she worked fewer hours... Strangely, none of this came up in decades of whining about the wage gap, just like the failure to invent anything, let alone entire industries, comes up when complaining about the dirth of female CEO's.
Also a lot of women's employment is government spending dependent: teachers, healthcare workers, government bureaucrats, etc.
No wife, happy life!
SPREAD THE WORD, GENTS
This is the most balanced, and well thought out explanation on this nuanced subject.
After listening to everything you said I can only say that if we want to fix all this we need to completely overhaul this marriage thing.
I mean from the bottom up, meaning first off we need to get rid of the pseudo Christian ceremony which we still practice where the woman wears a white dress, said white dress is supposed to signify a woman’s purity and chastity.
I’m saying we need to create a new ceremony with modern rules and modern expectations, we may even need to modify the vows since the majority of people don’t believe in them anyways.
I love the internet. It has enhanced my life greatly. That being said, you could never, ever create a better machine for destroying relationships than Social Media. I'm pretty sure I'll never secure a commited/exclusive relationship (I'll never marry) with a modern woman, because I'd require she shut down all her Social Media profiles, have no male "friends" and no late night "clubbing with the girls."
Basically you're very insecure. You are right to be single.
@@rickdeckardbladerunner2049 I'd prefer logical and pragmatic over insecure, but everyone's entitled to their opinion. That being said, The original Blade Runner and Blade Runner 2049 are two of my favorite movies..smiles!
@@johncarlson6472 Philosophers from 3000 year ago to the 1800's offer a lot of insight into human nature that is disturbing, and in fact, are the foundation for some strict cultural and religious traditions aimed at keeping that nature in check.
The end of those traditions started long before social media, which merely revealed that nature, whcih has been spreading through universities and teachers colleges since the 80's. Sociology professors deserve a lot of the blame.
1:20 If the children live with the father, they can still get protection. The only reason why the children are affected is because of the mother's actions afterwards. She will take the children with her as an insurance for her old age. Please do not put the children and the women together for everything. It is a manipulation that has been pushed to force men to protect women regardless of their actions. Marriage has little to no benefit for men, it was used to benefit women.
Agreed. I know a 36 year old man who got baby trapped and now mommy and granny basically don't want anything to do with him. The baby was the goal.
I've advised him to go his own way, but of course he's blue pilled and my words sound crazy to him. Oh well.
I understand what you’re saying there. But I think in ancient times, you needed to have women in order to get children. One man could father many children from many women. So I think that’s why they end up getting protected. Whether that’s true today or should be true today is certainly a good debate. I think I would agree that in today’s world women do not need that level of protection and should not get the benefits of legal advantages. Thanks.
@@john-griffin Yes, harems are the natural order of things, but kings allowed men to have wives so they would agree to protect the land, pay the taxes, and go off to battle. But now w-m-n side with the .1% of psychopaths that become high level politicians or divorce lawyers/judges to gain the level of control they've always desired.
My brother n law told me all men pay for sex and married men pay the most
That's obvious. Otherwise the oldest job of the world would get extinct long, long ago.
Your brother in law knows his sister diabolical spending habits
He also said you don't pay prostitutes for sex you pay them to leave after.
10:14 "Let her adore you, maintain control of the emotional aspects of the relationship." I would love to hear more on this. It's such a controversial topic and a slippery slope so I'd love to see your approach.
Sounds like a great video idea! Thanks
Well analyzed & articulated..
Thanks
Great video today John! Very well articulated. 🍻
Glad you enjoyed it!
I had a female religious friend who pushed the idea of marriage. I pointed out that the Bible encourages being single in 1 Corinthians 7:8 . (NLT) “So I say to those who aren’t married - it’s better to stay unmarried just as I am. “
LOL... but I'm careful with those religious drones. Some are adept at Scripture Kung-Fu and could knock you out with clever punches. I just tell them that God is not part of government sanctioned and licensed marriage.
but remain chaste.
Loyalty in a marriage is a commitment to be faithful and unwavering. The support, the honesty, the trust, despite the hardship. But in times of trial have been missing in modern women.
Good break down. Inevitable. Science and social.
Great video. Yes, Feminism + Social Media + Womens' economic self-sufficiency = Modern Dating Hell
Well done, John.
Very, very interesting facts bro
Glad you enjoyed it
I have been more afraid of women that liked me compared to those that didn't.😅
Men are not being told what marriage really is. Men are not told that signing that marriage license sets her up for life. The laws guarantees she gets the house, land, children, alimony and child support. She gets all of these by default. It's not 50 50, if you count alimony and child support, the man gets nothing and in the hole for 20 years. The divorce judge wants to keep her and the children in the house and the man to pay her way. Now she can sleep with any man on your dime and in your house. It's a horrible contract if you understand what it is meant to do.
I couldn't take pastors seriously growing up given what they were encouraging despite all that you laid out being true in the 80's. Credit though to the lawyers and older gentlemen in the area I worked that all told me to stay single when I just started my career.
It’s a shame how things are today. But business is still good for divorce attorneys.
That’s true, I’m sure undertakers will do really well in a war too
Apparently a 50 Billion / year industry in the US , follow the money
House sales up to no doubt? As long as big business profits then this will continue.
Feminism is just a shortened spelling of female narcissism.
Marriage whas designed to secure assets for wealthy families by arranging marriages. Ones the French aristocracy invented courtly love and marriage in the 1800's, the institution whas destined to fail. When you give people the possebility to tie the knot on their own accord, they automaticly have the right to the flipside of the coin, wich is the right to untie the knot whenever they wish to do so. Marriage has no place in the modern world and certainly not in a wealthy man's life.
80% of D-are instigated by xx..actually 90% if they are college educated
Yes, religions still push marriage like it’s the same institution from thousands of years ago.
Also consider how BC changes women’s choices in partners. It’s very interesting what personality traits become more or less attractive
Stress also changes a woman's hormones, thus altering who she's infatuated with and for how long. Furthermore, people need to look at the effect of chemicals (food and fake-ups) and parasites and their effect on women.
Easy to listen to and understand. Agree that a transition is beginning in society and marriage is a dangerous endeavor, for both sides. But struggling to find an answer when it comes to family. Most of us have the need and want for that love and experience in life. I am grateful for my big family but know it comes at a cost to my parents' happiness. If men and women want to have kids but not get married, are future families destined to be separate and children not know what it's like to have two parents at home? It's not so much divorce but separateness that hurts, causes insecurity and damage. Is marriage the fighting chance that keeps parents committed to the family? Ugh. Seems painful and vulnerable no matter which way you slice it.
It's outdated and not necessary anymore. Plus call me old fashioned but I don't like women having multiple sexual partners before marriage. If marriage is traditional and lots of women still love to want to be married, where have all the pure traditional women gone?
They're already married.
A woman at my work got flowers from 2 different men and one of my coworkes asked her if she was gonna date the guy with the biggest flowers.
😂
Can you do a video on the CAMERA FLYING DRONE that you use ? its great.
I think I’m gonna do it behind-the-scenes kind of video that’ll show you how I set all this up.
Call a plumber, call a carpenter, call an ironworker call a road worker, if you need anything, anything fixed or built a man will answer the call. Men are drafted into the military. Women sit back and generally enjoy what men have created and they whine about rights. You’re wrong. All one has to do is look around at the world to see it.
Too much stress, too many choices, too much independence, not enough commitment, too expensive to raise children, too much impatience, to much unwillingness to be flexible or compromise, catastrophic financial features of spending in marriage and divorce, too much boredom and work, too much temptation and distraction, too many disappointments with spouse and children, and people change and become too disinterested in one another to keep the marriage beneficial.
Future topic, perhaps: men who get married more than once.
slow learners
@@ThinkingAddiction Optimists? They say it's healthier to be optimistic. 🙂
it's gonna take a complete breakdown for things to change. No bandaid is gonna fix this.
When marriage ends the man loses.
every time. if kids are involved, they are the biggest losers overall.
I disagree. Any institution that no longer offers incentives to both parties will die. But humans continue to survive and adjust. Marriage is absolutely going to go away but a new version of it will take its place.
@@GBU61 we live in the hour of that new version of marriage right now. its called, no marriage.
@@GBU61 What does marriage not offer women? They can stay and he subsidizes, she can leave and he pays out. She can cheat on her husband w no societal or legal ramifications.....
Sadly, he loses as soon as the contract is signed and solidified within a few years, when she finally feels secure in revealing her true self for the first time, withholding s-x, nagging, demanding, isolating him from his friends and family...
Facts! Preach on, bro.
I actually have contempt for most women and I well explain why. They always talk about equality and rights yet they have very few of the responsibilities' that men have. Most women go thru life relying on there viginas. They are not require to be drafted , dont do any of the difficult dirty jobs yet there is no en of dissatisfaction with them but they get to vote same as men.. I have known a few women that I respect and admire but very very few.
I understand why you’re saying the things that you’re saying. But I think you’re generalizing all women as being the same as the worst women. And I think that’s unfair. Maybe you just had experience with some really unfortunate women.
@@john-griffin I said most women not all women.
@john-griffin the women you refer to are just as bad as the worst women...you want to know why? Because those women don't hold bad women accountable.
@@basemanawakens6089women don’t have a self regulating mechanism like men do, they don’t work in hierarchies
awesome vid g
Appreciate it
Don't forget common law partners can have the same legal rights as a marriage.
I would approach this from a different perspective. I think monogamous marriage was created to deal with the issues of polygamy and hypergamy. Even in cultures without these institutions, women and children were cared for, but in an arrangement of multiple wives or harems. The main problem monogamous marriage solved was a forced distribution of women across society to mitigate large numbers of unattached sexless men that tend to make war on society, both inward and out.
I’d argue that polygamy can’t keep women and children safe… first, a guy isn’t capable of keeping multiple wives and children safe, secondly - if he dies, a bunch of families will suffer…
^^both of you make good points.
At the end of the day, hypergamy is still undefeated. Either stay single or work your tail off and be the best male you can possibly be and TRY to satisfy hypergamy. I'm not a gambling man, but if I choose to gamble, it will be with a woman who grew up in a third-world country with a moral family
Monogamous marriage is the foundation of society. It allows a woman to pair bond with her husband for life. It prevents STDs. It gives a man a vested interest in building the society for his wife and heirs. It channels a man's enormous energy into positive pursuits. It gives the wife and children protection and the kids self-esteem. The father then teaches kids values and discipline.
@@djaeger-k5m polygamy has been the most common social arrangement from the dawn of time, across most cultures. With the arrival of Judeo/Christian culture in Europe, the first mass appearance of monogamous marriage arrangement occurred, primarily pushed by the Catholic Church. Without a doubt, this led to a more stable society and better outcomes overall. However, it doesn’t follow that polygamous cultures could not care for women and children. In fact, modern polygamous cultures exist that continue to do so. Take note of the fact that hypergamy drives women to seek the highest quality and most capable mates. Men without the capacity to care for multiple wives and children would not find themselves blessed with the benefit and responsibility of such.
That’s a really great theory. I’ve heard that before and I think there’s something to that. Thanks for sharing it.
Men are much more aware of the risks of marriage and have woken up and now just due there own thing. Relationships have also died.
Talk to any man who has been divorce raped.
A couple of years ago, I was acquainted with a man who had been left absolutely destitute after his divorce. He said he'd lived out of his car for 18 months. He went to the bathroom at Wal Mart and took showers at truck stops. I can't imagine how horrible that must have been. I resolved that would *NOT* happen to me. I'll never get married; no way.
@@txlyons2937 The only men I've known who weren't taken to the cleaners in divorce settlements:
1. Had nothing
2. Their assets were protected-in their family's name, e.g.
Esther Perel talks about this… there is too much pressure on the marriage/relationship to be everything to everyone… friend/lover/confidant etc…
so the marriage system in countries like India and Pakistan is proven to be perfect. Divorce rate is 1% in India. They don't give women too much choice to pick life partner which seems quite strange but it works really well. Both partner enter into marriage with their roles very clear and it works.
This information is dated. It might have still been largely true when I traveled there in 2000 but what you wrote is no longer correct. Social media and feminism’s tentacles reach into many parts of India. Maybe some rural areas still are the way you describe, but do you really want to marry an Indian village girl?
I’ve been hearing that the divorce rate in India is skyrocketing lately. So even there, things are changing.
30% of the planet are muzlimms..they dont allow theirxx to behave like in the W and they are brought up in a traditional way with the male family members keeping an eye on them
I see tons of Indian men swearing off marriage on yt comments… apparently their laws are worse and there’s false accusations flying left, right and center… even their Supreme Court is warning women about it apparently
The abuses are hidden from view through shaming.....and it can be very brutal and violent
I am a fluent English speaker I wish you added an English subtitle so I would be able to improve my vocabulary as I learn English to be an advanced one and also I learn lessons in life from you as well.
I've never been interested in marriage since I was a kid. It's like I instinctively knew that it wasn't for me. So, I never really invested much into it and have been living my life pretty free from drama and risk.
I agree the concept of marriage has really gone down the drain, and that marriage is a risky proposition as well as the issues that are present with women. I think that we all need to come back down to reality especially women. Women can "choose to be" single for right now, but when they get older and on their deathbed, they'll wish they made better decisions in their life, but it's too late by then. However, I really feel that people need to learn to go back to understanding how relationships between two people is supposed to be, since a lot of people don't understand what a proper relationship really even is these days. If your seeking a woman, your best bet would be to seek out someone who wants to build a relationship together with you, whose there through the rough and the good times, and someone who you can enjoy /spend time with, and you have to seek this out through a logical lens and not through an emotional one. And really take your time to get to know her, before even considering marriage. If she's the type of woman who understands you , and gives you the time that you need to build a relationship with her, then you have someone good. If you guys fight and she's always trying to talk it out and changes for you to make the relationship work, then you have someone good. If she wants to work together with you on things, then you have someone good. It is her "qualities" that we are to seek and not just her looks. If she has nice things to say behind your back then you have someone good. Once you have fully established these things with her, then you can perhaps take on the topic of marriage. I'm not saying that what I said is 100% foolproof at all, but it lowers the risk of the relationship falling apart, and finding a woman with good qualities is harder these days, but not impossible.
I say to enjoy life for time being. Have some fun, and do the things that you always wanted to do. Focus on your goals and try to enjoy your life. Go out and maybe meet people or do things that you enjoy. Be open to the possibility that someone good could along. That's all we can do for now.
Love is grand
Divorce is a hundred grand
NYC divorce attorney said that
John, in case you don't know, there is actually a movie called "Caveman" starting Ringo Starr and Barbara Bach where she is with the biggest baddest caveman and Ringo wants to win her over. It's really a very funny film so it's worth watching just from the humour point of view though also from the point of view of "laydees have always been like this".
I remember that movie being made. I never did see it but I bet it’s hilarious. Thanks.
@@john-griffin Given you are my age and grew up with beatles music all around you like I did. You will love it I am sure. I laughed my A off during that movie and wondered how they ever got Ringo to do it. I am guess Barbara Bach has something to do with it. She was very hot in those days.
I've seen that movie - it's corny 🙄
@@nomad6086 oh I agree. It's really corny or cheesy. Very simplistic. Whatever you want to say. But it's also hysterical. Its slapstick comedy.
Im a woman and I’ll never get married
GIRL POWER !
u have the state backing u up...eg.there are 100x more xx shelters than mens
Unusual…almost all women are obsessed with getting married and having kids
(down on one knee) Will you marry me?
@@woodrmp1 don’t forget there’s always outliers. I’m quite the outlier
Marriage has been and always will be about economics and the exchange of services
Men provide food/physical security and women provide children and sex
As any society brings to grow, marriage is a necessary element in order to keep society stable
If you have to many men with no access to women (which we have today) they will violent and often reek havoc and if you have to many women without husbands they become a burden on society’s limited resources
Marriage was created for social and economic stability and not love
Divorce laws makes one party rich and set up for life. That is the only reason.
Good information could you do a video on the man marrying to have kids where she becomes their friend and the father is the boundary and rules maker, and in the end when divorced the kids stay her buddy and distances themselves from the father. Thanks for the great videos.
This is a fascinating subject. Every day in central Cali I see hover-moms bringing their celebrated “buddy” (their word, not mine) into clinic while a piece-of-furniture father tries to exhibit some relevance. Exaggerated respect paid to the little prince/princess is proportional to the lack of regard for the man. This is the norm, not the exception, though some religious communities such as the Sikhs are excepted.
Social transitions can be quick and painless or they can be slow and destructive. Unfortunately, it is likely that hundreds of millions of western men will still get caught in the meat grinder of a dying social model.
That is the sad truth.
Dutch Treat Dating is the only way to roll as an adult male. She must put skin in the game or basically fair play. Keep in mind she's making an income most likely more than you!
Good luck with that. Because of dating apps & social media, any half-way decent looking woman is getting bombarded by the simps who will say or do anything to date her. 🤣
It's definitely a class thing. I'm in England. So, the middle classes, professional classes etc are still marrying as usual. The working classes are not, and this is detrimental mostly I would argue to working class women. I'm lucky, I've worked my way up without marriage or children, and I'm working class, so I know I'm an enigma in this sense. Most girls I knew from high school ended up single mums, which is a hard life, and too hard a path for me to go down, despite always wanting children. Life is crazy now. Marriage is good for both sexes, I think, by and large. Peace and love 💕
I agree that the transition we are in has to end at some point. I sometimes think about what that is going to look like. I personally think society is in trouble from a number of things and there is going to be a great big crash at some point that is going to set everything back to a traditional kind of situation... when will it happen ?... I'm not sure but I don't think we are very far away..10-20 years unless something drastic happens. I understand others might have a different opinion what will take place and I'm interested in hearing it.
I think artificial intelligence might be the catalyst. If the need for workers shrinks dramatically, then the only way to create balance will be to shrink the workforce. While at the same time, wanting to prop up population numbers, it might be beneficial for government to intervene by, incentivizing higher birth rates. That may force us into a more traditional nuclear family again. One where there is a single breadwinner and one parent in charge of raising children. I could be wrong, but it’s a possible outcome.
@@john-griffin interesting I hadn't considered the AI aspect. I don't think anything were the government gets involved is going to work would be my difference... everything they get involved in...they screw it up
Friendship is better than isolation imho, so both sexes will support each other as the world darkens......when poverty begins to steal dreams away from credit ridden modern people.....both sexes will work together again...
Look to Japan. They are the clear forerunner of a high technological society with high debt. Marriage rates are at the lowest. Ultimately it appears that in a high technology, egalitarian society marriage is essentially useless as a form of relational interaction between a man and woman. Ironically, that puts us back to square one: marriage is only for the care and rearing of children. None of this soul mate BS, love BS, or friend BS.
I heard someone say recently marriage ends in loathing, if it doesn’t you are very lucky.
The most miserable people I know are married with children.
I meet alot of married men and non can totally convince me to get married besides the acclaimed benefit of having kids to care for you when you're old and companionship. I've found my way around that and made my peace with it.
55 never married, never will.