Melanie, I need to thank you...after listening to oodles of your video...today...as u described my narcissist came back. Right when you said he would...right when u said I'd be ready to be free of him, he'd show up. Thanks to your videos and u sharing ur very important knowledge I had the tools to repel him, and I can't be happier...tons of stress off my shoulders. 4 yrs of abuse this man brought on and kept gaslighting me....but I did it...I freed the beast and gained my LIFE back...never so happy in my life. Love you, thank you, you totally rock and my life has its shine back in it. Thank you... KISSING OFF MY NARCISSIST!!
Any narcs I have known were extremely spoiled during childhood. They suffered little because their parents did everything for them while telling them they were gifted and above everybody else. Their "false self" does not come from abuse, it comes from their bewilderment that the sun does not actually shine out of their arse hole. The narc will tell you all sorts of sad, sad stories in order to get you to save them and take care of them--just like their parents did. If you refuse, they will have a temper tantrum, rage, break things and threaten you. In other words, act just like the children they are. Melanie, thank you for your kind wisdom. You are truly a blessing.
Laffintig yup narcissists are made sometimes their abuse sometimes the spoiled fucking rotten and get everything spoon-fed to them that's becoming a narcissist and thinking the whole world revolves around there pretty ass
Ik two of them had a mix of both. I known 1 (my dad) who was mainly spoiled but, and he was also abused as well at times, and Ik another (Jessica) who was extremely abused, sexually, physically, by various family members, and then later she was spoiled by her mom who was once neglectful b/c she felt so bad about what the dad done. Both extremes together are esp harmful they say b/c the sense of self is being ripped in half, and based on how they're treated, on 1 hand the abused sense of self feeling and thinking it's bad and inferior, and on the other the spoiled sense of self thinking it can do no wrong, and deserves it's @$$ kissed. Both are false ofc, and narcissist are both extremely insecure (though they'll often hide it), and self-entitled, as well as they have the false overly confident sense of self to mask their wounded self, and are often completely unaware of their own actions.(ofc alot of ppl who had these experiences won't end up narcs but some will) Their ego is in reality very fragile but hiding behind a mask to seem like they have self worth, and they bounce constantly from worthlessness to thinking their Gods if that makes any sense. They're highly illogical, have no true self-identity, and highly superficial beings that are all about appearances rather than reality, and b/c they are not strong enough to address their own wounds, actions, and reality in general, and are to fearful to look deeper within to address their traumas, and own insecurities, so while they project this false sense of ego & superiority, they end up hurting everybody around them out of envy b/c deep down they feel inferior, and that's why they always feel the need to hide behind lies. They project all their own bs unto others, deflect all responsibility of their actions, all b/c they are weak & pathetic creatures not strong enough to deal w/ it like an adult. As sad as this is, most will nvr heal b/c most are to weak to even admit they have a problem, take a real look at their own actions, and address the source, which is their trauma. As she says they are very unconscious. I still feel bad some have been abused b/c innocent children nvr deserve abuse but, much like any other type of abusive person, the person who really deserves the majority of compassion is the person that gets w/ the abuser (and often those ppl have been abused already too but unlike the narc they own their ish and don't deflect all responsibility, and are often good ppl who just fail to realize their own value b/c of how they been treated).
I know two narks now one covert one malignent and they both have horible childhood. I know cause I was in the family (married to a nark) I could see how his parents treated children (their grandchildren). What I saw matches what nark told me of abuse complitly. Don't doubt it at all. People even went to jail for stuff they ve done.
@@oglefrugalbugel9646 I tend to agree with this explanation because even though narcs lie a lot they also reveal some things (not usually the abuse) about parental treatment. My narcs parents did instill that he was the golden child UNTIL his 4 years younger brother came along and he begrudgingly had to share the glory. The father taught him that the husband is the boss and that his mother was of inferior intelligence because she was a woman and therefore not to be validated for any opinion. Must have been confusing for a child and explains my narcs sense of superiority to women, sense of entitlement and selfishness, inability to share their glory with anyone else (outright jealousy of successful younger brother and character assassinations to go along with that), a failed marriage after becoming an electrical engineer with a very esteemed and lucrative position in an established and internationally acclaimed research centre, more failed partner relationships, golden boy loses golden position, golden boy loses possession of beautiful golden girl, golden boy sinks to depression and isolation but continues hunting and obtaining female supply partners who suddenly leave for various reasons but never because he did anything wrong. All of this is hindsight as I go through recovery from this deceitful and horrific experience I suffered at his sadistic and twisted company. The healing path has to go back to why I would even forgive or tolerate any form of disrespect or abuse beyond that of a person with self-esteem or self-worth and perhaps this nightmare (and daymare) had to occur for me to receive the support and counselling that should have been provided to me a lifetime ago but wasn't.
I didn't trust my gut feelings and this caused me constant confusion. The narc would say one thing but the energy said something else. The narc lied so much that the kids don't believe anything told to them, yet at the same time the kids and narc find truth as the most offensive thing in the universe.
True. If you tend to trust that all people mean what they say and actually know what they are talking about, you are trapped in this confusion with a narcissist. The truth starts dawning on you when you realize that on certain occasions they may claim the opposite of what they blurted out with equal conviction before, and their actions are rarely a match to their ideals they broadcast and judge people by.
A lot of empaths are also were abused as children. It was a self protective measure which can manifest an empath. So a lot of this is dead on. Also being around a lot of people are terrible for empaths.
another life affirming video thank you. I was terrified that I was becoming like my ex. I did go thru a reclusive period while I was healing and processing my childhood stuff, relearning who I am what I like and dislike, how I feel. This required total detachment from the narc, no contact at all for as long as it took. Now I trust myself. it took time but it's worth it. Serenity is the reward.
this is so GOOD! thank you. i have been so so low for so long. made my world smaller and smaller by not wanting to be around people because every time i had those people would somehow use it to hurt me. when i was trying to figure out the world. i chose looking back narcists which confirmed it wasnt safe. i am learning now i have a RIGHT to say "no" and have boundraies. gosh but its so scary. i was really questioning ALL people were narcississts and this is it. i opened up and shared so much to few people trying to use them to share about my pasts, all my epiphanies and it turns out they were just a recarniation of my family and past wounds which again made me feel maybe it was me that is the problem, not safe to be real, thats how the world is everyone is fake, uses one another. i couldnt be this way i just CANT. i have been wanting for so long to be a personal trainer and use what i have been learning all these years but when i again shared these exciting dreams i felt crushed with doubt and fear. just went back into my hole questioning my motives and why i wanted to be that. was it just my empath/codepent self and would i just be attracting narcississts that would suck what little life i had left. but i see now i do have a right, and its possible to anchor and have boundaries. i think whats scary for me is trusting who is real and who is just learning my insurities, etc and eventually playing me. i am scared that i am too wounded and will always have that fear in the back of my mind that they really dont mean what they say. but as i write this i am getting the message it doenst matter or it shouldnt i need to love and accept me first and not look for others to validate my self worth by telling me in whatever way (smart, strong, beautiful etc). thank YOU so so much for this video. sorry for the novel. oh another thing that is so hard is to forgive myself for not seeing it or having a sense that these poeple were narcississts and allowing them to still pull me down. its so hard to not take that as truth. like the common theme is whatever they say so it must be true... then also beating myself up for allowing those types of people into my life to begin with. like there must be something wrong with me for them to ever think they could treat me that way. like i am that transparent and pathetic. i beat myself up for being so nice, smilie, give comoleiments. i just want to be REAL i dont want to feel like i have to always have this wall up and look tough because if i smile its like game on, blood in the water. it just so draining when person after person pulls you down you just feel all people are like this and you isolate, protect yourself so much that you just stop living and years past. then you have to face that reality of remorse and sorrow and wishing you could go back in time. so much given away for people who in the end dont give a crap. sorry for the novel!
I can't thank you enough. It all makes sense. I've set my date, I've gone no contact. I'm going to leave my abusive partner of 10 and a half years on Saturday. I am a strong and wonderful woman and I can't wait to have time for me, to use my energy to enjoy life and love myself as I deserve. Thank you again. You've helped me become stronger.
Melanie, this is a VERY IMPortant video for those of us who FEEL too much. I appreciate the Truth recitations at the end!! "It is safe for me to..."... You have been one of my top two greatest sources of healing. I thank God for you!
I agree w/ u 100%. I find what has made me susceptible to my narcissist was that I didn't have enough boundaries, or was unsure where they went, as I grew up w/ a narcissist dad who walked all over the few boundaries I did have, and that I felt sorry for her b/c I felt her pain tm. I very much know who I am but, like u say, some ppl just aren't ready to heal, and that's something I really had to learn to accept in life. The internal work on them can only be done by them, and narcs are to weak to be honest w/ themselves and admit they have a problem so they just deflect and project. Sometimes they give false direction to keep u from leaving pretending they're going to counseling, and wanna change bla bla and once they have u bk it's the same ol bs again. What kept me there was feeling so much empathy b/c Ik she was very abused, and that's how she got screwed up, figuring she probably didn't want to be that way and feeling so bad for her but, at the same time...I should have had more empathy & love for myself. It's good to love & tc of others but, it's important to love and tc of ourselves as well, and maintain a healthy balance. I'm nvr going to give so much leeway to a narc again, or let them in my life b/c next time I'll be able to not only identify them, but also will make sure to keep my boundaries set in stone, and not let them use my empathy to manipulate me. Ofc I want to heal others but, I shouldn't try to do so at the complete detriment of myself, or when ppl are just being fake, manipulating me, and only pretending to recognize they're in the wrong when I leave, or am going to leave. I think now that Ik and am enforcing my boundaries will definitely help me to steer clear of narcs.
So true Mel it’s about trusting in SELF. Knowing about stuff as a child and not being emotionally heard really frightens little children and gives us low self esteem and self worth as adults. It takes a lot of self help work to find your power as an adult a constant struggle for empaths between the mind and the heart. Empaths YES can also stick up for others battles but not so much themselves. Great post
What you say is so true. As an empathy my covert narc mother absolutely scrambled my brains for years by lying to me. It took me years and years (with the help of your videos) to make sense of everything.
I have endured a family member narcissist for 36 years. Things really escalated in the past few years. I unraveled last week and cut all ties. I stumbled across your videos and they have truly helped me to look at things more logically instead of with all emotion. I've definitely been in the cognitive Dissonance phase. And have signed up for your webinar. Thank you for being so informative, clear, to the point and caring.
Oh my gosh, I just realized this is why I am so utterly exhausted after interacting with people. Like if I go to a party I am wiped out afterwards, or if I am at an event where there are lots of people. I don't know why I never made this connection before - of course I am absorbing other people's energy all the time!
Hi Mel. Thank you so much. Being a powerful empath myself and therefore constantly picking up everyone's vibrations and not in healthy ways caused me to shut down in areas where it would be healthier to remain open. The only way I was able to do this was to firmly anchor into myself and create the boundaries that I clearly needed in order to tap into the gift of who I am with the abilities to help others. Lots of love, Helen xxo
I appreciate you and your work so much, thank you. Your words are the opposite of "victim" and a clear higher path to clarity. I do not want to keep repeating different versions of this over and over. I want to get to finished with narcissistic learning.
Thanks so much Melanie. I'm now 3 months no contact from an abusive narc. My intuition is kicking back in nicely and I'll never ignore it ever again. I've learnt to trust it even if a person or situation seems ok, if my body is telling me otherwise I'm listening!!
WOW, you are one of the few people I have seen that answers your people on your youtube!~ Great job! That is awesome, people that have been are are being abused need engagement and to feel in communication with people that could help them,
Wow! I needed to hear this! You pegged me to a tee. Now I get why I've lived the life I have and why something always felt missing despite my truest intentions and sincere efforts. They aren't enough. I scored 109 on the NPD test. And beneath it all, I'm not that happy. The biggest message God or Universe has been trying to get me to see for years is what you just articulated - that of self-empowerment. I can go no further as I am and truly enjoy the rest of my life until I change this. You are a beautiful soul and I appreciate so much what you have said. Thank you for making this powerful video. Blessings!
I absolutely learnt something amazing from this episode. You are an amazing human being Tanya and hope you will carry on the good work. Thank you for saving me and I am doing my best to help others via all that I learn from you and already have helped my poor sister who speaks another language and as a result she is so much better within herself.
+Mahnaz Andrews thank you ... I certainly am not giving up this mission anytime soon .... or ever ... I am so pleased I could help you and your sister. Bless you xoxox
Thank you Melanie - I love the empath message - especially the part about how we can make an astounding difference to the world. Looking back at my childhood and all of my horrendous relationships, I wouldn't have it any other way. Your message has made such a huge difference in my life and truly altered my trajectory profoundly. What you are accomplishing and the way you are serving people is truly phenomenal!
I hate that I'm dealing with this...it's been 12 years and I still can't get out of this relationship SMH but these videos has been helping me out alot
+MsSupaBadd1ofakind Then don’t waste another moment of your life. Buy Melanie’s NARP. I did, well over a year ago and I’ve never regretted it. It brought me rapid healing after the end of a narcissistically abuse relationship, six months versus seven years, from an even earlier relationship that wasn’t even narcissistically abusive. I continue to use the healing tools I learned from NARP to this day. Purchasing NARP and joining the NARP forum have been the two best investments in myself that I’ve ever made. The return from those investments continue even now.
what is mind blowing is being an empath (who has had no guidance to develop healthy intuition with this gift) who was brought up by a narcissistic mother and an alcoholic father and step-father. I am now 58 and my parents are deceased, my recovery started about 8 years ago when I began the road to realizing that my mother was in the narcissistic spectrum. I am the oldest (scapegoat) and my sister and only sibling (golden child or conformer) still maintains the status quo of that dysfunctional dynamic. Trying to heal that negative false voice of condemnation that plays over and over within my energy.
Thank you Melanie , after a marriage and currently relationship to narcissists/bpd I've realized I actually subconsciously seek them out with the hopes that I can use my empathy to understand and heal grow with them which is entirely impossible , Thank you for this it is much needed wisdom , and the Mantra ....perfect
I was a very sensitive child and remember spending time in my closet and day dreaming to get away from the abuses in my home. I am tuned into everything going around me. I have learned to trust my gut feeling, and am an extrovert love being in crowds as long as the energy is positive, I don't like when I get mixed into someone else's negative energy or if someone is intoxicated.
Yes, I am an empath and have been connected to a narcissist for years, I catalogued all the behaviors but until the behavior turned toward me did a light bulb come on! I feel so naive ;( I now have to deal with being a target. Once I wakened she saw me as unpredictable and a threat. Because I energetically started to move away from what I was, I started to move toward safety no matter the circumstance, I found the universe inside myself, started doing mindfulness. I've been curious when triggered and started to take my power back. I became the target all of the sudden. It was an energy shift. I've started to heal. Thank you for being here! xx
Thank you so much for this video! This is exactly what I need as an empath. I am currently recovering from a destructive relationship with a narcissist, even though we broke up two and a half year ago. I didn't realize I had such deep inner traumas until a while after. So now I do tons of shadow work and I'm going to apply your tools to end my susceptibility to narcissists. To realize that I am a codependent was the time when everything in my life made sense. I thought I was going crazy, not knowing what was happening and why I was so emotional and life was so hard all the time and why all of my relationships were not satisfying or meeting my needs at all. Thank u for this video! It will definitely be helpful since I've been wondering how to recover from codependency specifically.
As an; Intuitive Empath who JUST got out of a 21 month relationship with my Twin Flame (who is a Covert Narcissist), this was SO needed! I have been amerced in your; video's, BLOG's and information for DAYS. I am a bit overwhelmed with all the amazing information and I am trying to be kind and pace myself. I, like you, almost didn't make it. Lot's of demonic and reptilians, trying to extinguish my LIGHT! My TF Covert Narcissist ALMOST got me, he almost brought me down! Thank you Mel
Carol, you are so welcome. Hun if you really want to heal, truly take the dive into my inner transformational resources - that's where the REAL juice is for your amazing recovery. Its your time! www.melanietoniaevans.com/freecourse xoxox
@@MelanieToniaEvans I signed up for it about 5-6 days ago and have been receiving your daily e-mails. I signed-up for your WEBINAR tonight also. Love and Light
Likewise, I've always known I was an empath, Just didn't realize the flaws of it. You have opened my eye's to something that was staring me in the face!
Thank you Melanie. This video has really helped me shift how I see myself and others' opinions of me - for the first time ever I'm actually able to choose to not care what other people's opinions are and have confidence in my own ones over theirs!
I've never doubted what I felt and knew but Leaning what to do with the energy and truth's were my issue it kept me disturbed but now many years later I navagate my self with this empath gift...the NPD relationship was very challenging since I was clueless but my prayers gave me miraculous clarity to connect the dots about his presence affecting me and turning my life upside down any many many ways it was like syfy experience... Omg!!! 6mos was enough... I'm free of that person but with your help I'm evolving towards true personal freedom as a codependent emotionally traumatized by my mother and abandoned by my biological father.... Thank you so very much!!!😇😇😇
I wanna so thank you for putting this out Melanie.I read so may articles and watched countless programs and videos about narcissistic abuse but none of them came near to putting it like you do, you break it down intellectually and you don't miss on anything! I just stumbled upon your channel a few days ago after 4 months of battling to heal from a not so long but damaging enough narcs relashionship. Listening to you talk about it made me find the missing links and connect the dots. I feel wonderful :)You mentioned that you wrote an article about the subject of this specific episode but I can't find the link. Do you mind posting it again please? Thank you again and keep on thriving :)Mounia
I love what you said about showing up whole, and radiant first; so that then we can go on to help others. That meant a lot to me. I am loving and believe I am hear to heal others. I want to continue to work on myself 1st. Thank you so much for your help and healing♡
After much soul searching-I have concluded that I am not an empath and, thus, my brush with a narc was a relatively brief one. I cannot imagine how hard it would be to tangle with a narc when your whole soul wants only to please them and receive validation from them.
I so relate to this being an empath as an infp healer type (from mbti personality types). I do feel that my purpose is to heal the collective consciousness and this completes me...thank you for helping me bring myself back to my purpose
The most difficult word that I had to learn how to say was the word "NO"because I felt that I had to do, I had to help, I had to be there for somebody. I know now sometimes I need to recharge my own mind and just say NO, or I am no use to anyone and therefore I can not help with their healing.
This video is everything that I need right at this moment as I am in the middle of confronting a narcissist who I was in a business partnership with me. All that you said and shared in this video is really helping me to navigate. Thank you so much.
You are right Melanie. Impossible for anybody to please everybody at the same time. Not easy to be human sometimes. But it helpes to remind ourselves we are just humans and everyone probably do the best with what they got. Thank you
This was very helpful! I tend to be very intuitive and usually trust my gut but when dealing with husband (soon to be ex) I constantly second guessed myself! He twisted everything into knots and just pounded away at things until I was worn out and didn't have the energy to keep fighting. Unfortunately, I would end up agreeing (because it was easier than fighting) and this did NOT serve me well. After years and years I "stood up for myself" in unhealthy ways. I became unconscious and it bit me in the back side and tore me apart. I'm working your program now and I can't begin to express my appreciation to your channel and information that you share. xoxoxox
Empowering and affirming. I have been doing alot of this work already but its great to have affirmations to the process of showing up authentically . Thanks for all your hard work.
Hi Melanie, thanks so much for this video and information. Whilst I certainly recognise myself in here, I also see my 8 year old son in here too. I have been teaching him since he was 4 about quantum energy and trying to help him develop a healthy relationship with his inner wisdom rather than making the same mistake I did - looking outside myself. Im always keen for your wisdom on co parenting with a narcissist. As a conscious parent, the last thing I want is to watch my son emulate either his father or his co dependent partner. - valuable material as always, thanks so much x
Very appropriate in-puts! Thanks so much, Melanie, God bless you in your onward task and journey! You have literally hit the nail on the head with your latest videos!
Favorite part: Being (healed and thus) Radiant, Truthful. & Authentic. Narcissist shows incongruities... Response: You're not healthy to be with & walk away. xx Thank you :)
Thank you so much for all of the information you put forrh to the world. you are amazing! I have been drawn to narcs and been a stand out target for them most of my life. I never even knew what a narcissist was. or why I continued to from 1 abusive relationship to another....... Until I rcvd an email from you. your teaching brought such revalations! unbelievable. Thank you. I love you sister. You are a warrior angel.
That was so me, 100%. Wow, I'm just stunned. Like you were talking about me. I would even have visions in my dreams that would come true. I predicted (in my dreams) all the events in my life. Even about what the nark was doing behind my back, all of it. If I have only trusted my feelings and visions I wouldn't even marry the nark, let alone stay 15 years. Thank you so much. I felt like I wasn't self love deficient or codependent as I would rather be alone than with someone who is not treating me with love and respect. Covert nark picked up on that and pretended he adore me until the mask fell off. I was so overwhelmed with feeling all the energies too and everyone pain and since I started your program and in general working on my self I feel like not everything and everyone is my responsibility. I stopped feeling energies other people experience and I just stay with my own energy. I thought to my self, this is how regular people feel? amazing! This video was so important to me. Thank you❤️❤️❤️ love from Rene
The more I listen to these talks the more I learn. Such good psychological observations with so much truth in the words. Thank you so much for these brilliant videos. (Upleveller)
Thank You Melanie! It's incredible how your message resonates with me.. and it's a relief in a way.. because now I know what's "wrong" with me.. and it's good to know I am not alone and there's a way to transform, which is what I've been doing for a year. thank you for your help Melanie :)
Thank you for the insight of the childhood of an Empath, very helpful and insightful! Some other communities would call this the gift of mercy...I am not sure what you mean though about "being in your own body". You said that a lot...I guess I need to stay tuned...Blessings!
Thank you very much for the reasoning in different areas here. I only realized I am an empath a year and a half ago, and a co-dependant a few months ago. I like what you mentioned about flying monkeys because it's so true. I still have a lot of healing to do because it don't want to be bitter from my experiences or always be in fear mode of attracting them. I have utilized some methods to test people if I think something isn't right with their energy, but I know by fully healing myself, they won't even want to be in my company I'm sure. xo
You are amazing! Thank you so, so much :) you have definitely shed light on a few things I was still trying to find out! I didn't even know I was empath, once again thankyou so much for this insight! Truly amazing and I hope others who have difficulties in life may find this video and be guided towards true happiness as I'm currently in midst of figuring out life's truer high purpose :) lots of love to you all out there having a hard time or those seeking something in life! Happiest of days to you all :)
Thank you SO much for all your videos, for your website. I feel like I am awakening... like I've been asleep and now things are making sense. I appreciate you so much! Thanks again! Susan
thank you for the awesome information you are sharing, you are such a beautiful soul. i listen to you and feel so understood and right. you are giving voice to my deepest thoughts and emotions. that is the most empowering thing ever. i will be sending you an e-mail soon, where I would like to share with you some of my thoughts of gratitude on how much you have helped me along my way. especially in crucial moments around narcissists, when i needed clarity and perspective. you are awesome and your light is brighter than you may be aware of, as its heals whatever it touches❤
Thank you so much for all of the information. U? are amazing! I have been drawn to narcs and been a stand out target for them most of my life. 9p I never knew what a narcissist was. or why I continued to from 1 abusive relationship to another....... Until I rcvd an email from you. your teaching brought such revelation's! unbelievable. Thank you. You Melanie are a warrior angel. I love you sister.
Hey Melanie - I've watched a few of these, and I really think that this might be your best talk yet, maybe ever! Wow - you're saying it just like it is, just like any fully-aware animal would and does - Cats, Dogs, Birds - they all know this, and we can too if we just spend some time in natural settings, get in touch with the Earth and stay open to the life energy. Somewhere in between the empath and the narcissist is the way ahead... Mahalo!
Great videos. However, a thought on the "flying monkey" term is - many of those F. M. did damage and even actively chose to do damage. So in my life there WERE F.M. who acted in a self-righteous, entitled way to support the Narc. and gave me NO credit or thought even though they knew me as well and purposely chose to help the Narc act out on me or after he did . They were very quick to turn on me and defend the abuser! They are also people who are wounded themselves and don't want to see the truth. While I can have empathy for them, they also have to take responsibility for their actions (which none have). It would be like saying, you can't call some one a co-dependent, even though they clearly act like one. So I do and will use the term Flying Monkey. I was not a flying monkey in my relationship with the NARC. I acted like a co-dependent though and have had to unravel why that was so. Just as a F.M. needs to unravel why they were so quick to put on blinders and defend the Narc! And even though I don't like saying that I was a co-dependent or be identified at that time as one in my life. That's how I behaved! What isn't being acknowledged is the F.M's are INVESTED in seeing the Narc a certain way. And F.M's have major work to do too! The Narc, the co-dependent, the F.M.'s are all separate units of the same sick relationship to making the Narc system work.
I get what you are saying, emphasizing compassion for the flying monkeys but I still like the term. I absolutely understand a well meaning empath gett hoodwinked by a manipulative so and so. A shock to the system to be called a name can be needed to bring them back to reality. Hard to be all that compassionate on the receiving end, but inner peace comes from doing our own healing. Enablers of narcs are some of the most trying people to have to deal with.
This is very enlightening and I thank you so very much for this clarification. Now I understand why I am an Empath and how I can correct the emotional dysregulation caused by it. 👍👍💖
until that point I was turning myself into a people pleasing pretzel. It was painful being inauthentic and I despised myself for being a worm but until I was ready to get well I had no choice. finally I got GOD Gift Of Desperation...
Thank you. I needed to hear just this message tonight. The thing is-I was literally living on boomerang road when I met my narc 😂(Oh ya just gotta laugh sometimes-our other places at Webster and Wall and Warren. Ya just can't make this stuff up!)That emoji is either me laughing or crying-a little bit of both! I've learned about them and it helps me discover me. Ironic, this life is! But in my life, not having a full understanding of this gift/curse -has been disfunctional. Obviously. I've liked, subscribed, put you on my favorite videos of all time list and plan to watch this again with pen and paper. From there I will do some artistic affirmation for the wall. Thank you!
Melanie, I need to thank you...after listening to oodles of your video...today...as u described my narcissist came back. Right when you said he would...right when u said I'd be ready to be free of him, he'd show up. Thanks to your videos and u sharing ur very important knowledge I had the tools to repel him, and I can't be happier...tons of stress off my shoulders. 4 yrs of abuse this man brought on and kept gaslighting me....but I did it...I freed the beast and gained my LIFE back...never so happy in my life. Love you, thank you, you totally rock and my life has its shine back in it. Thank you...
KISSING OFF MY NARCISSIST!!
It's my absolute pleasure swsun and I'm pleased you were prepared and moved through the hoover attempt. Keep thriving hun xoxox
Any narcs I have known were extremely spoiled during childhood. They suffered little because their parents did everything for them while telling them they were gifted and above everybody else. Their "false self" does not come from abuse, it comes from their bewilderment that the sun does not actually shine out of their arse hole.
The narc will tell you all sorts of sad, sad stories in order to get you to save them and take care of them--just like their parents did. If you refuse, they will have a temper tantrum, rage, break things and threaten you. In other words, act just like the children they are.
Melanie, thank you for your kind wisdom. You are truly a blessing.
Laffintig you’re so right
Laffintig yup narcissists are made sometimes their abuse sometimes the spoiled fucking rotten and get everything spoon-fed to them that's becoming a narcissist and thinking the whole world revolves around there pretty ass
Ik two of them had a mix of both. I known 1 (my dad) who was mainly spoiled but, and he was also abused as well at times, and Ik another (Jessica) who was extremely abused, sexually, physically, by various family members, and then later she was spoiled by her mom who was once neglectful b/c she felt so bad about what the dad done. Both extremes together are esp harmful they say b/c the sense of self is being ripped in half, and based on how they're treated, on 1 hand the abused sense of self feeling and thinking it's bad and inferior, and on the other the spoiled sense of self thinking it can do no wrong, and deserves it's @$$ kissed. Both are false ofc, and narcissist are both extremely insecure (though they'll often hide it), and self-entitled, as well as they have the false overly confident sense of self to mask their wounded self, and are often completely unaware of their own actions.(ofc alot of ppl who had these experiences won't end up narcs but some will) Their ego is in reality very fragile but hiding behind a mask to seem like they have self worth, and they bounce constantly from worthlessness to thinking their Gods if that makes any sense. They're highly illogical, have no true self-identity, and highly superficial beings that are all about appearances rather than reality, and b/c they are not strong enough to address their own wounds, actions, and reality in general, and are to fearful to look deeper within to address their traumas, and own insecurities, so while they project this false sense of ego & superiority, they end up hurting everybody around them out of envy b/c deep down they feel inferior, and that's why they always feel the need to hide behind lies. They project all their own bs unto others, deflect all responsibility of their actions, all b/c they are weak & pathetic creatures not strong enough to deal w/ it like an adult. As sad as this is, most will nvr heal b/c most are to weak to even admit they have a problem, take a real look at their own actions, and address the source, which is their trauma. As she says they are very unconscious. I still feel bad some have been abused b/c innocent children nvr deserve abuse but, much like any other type of abusive person, the person who really deserves the majority of compassion is the person that gets w/ the abuser (and often those ppl have been abused already too but unlike the narc they own their ish and don't deflect all responsibility, and are often good ppl who just fail to realize their own value b/c of how they been treated).
I know two narks now one covert one malignent and they both have horible childhood. I know cause I was in the family (married to a nark) I could see how his parents treated children (their grandchildren). What I saw matches what nark told me of abuse complitly. Don't doubt it at all. People even went to jail for stuff they ve done.
@@oglefrugalbugel9646 I tend to agree with this explanation because even though narcs lie a lot they also reveal some things (not usually the abuse) about parental treatment. My narcs parents did instill that he was the golden child UNTIL his 4 years younger brother came along and he begrudgingly had to share the glory. The father taught him that the husband is the boss and that his mother was of inferior intelligence because she was a woman and therefore not to be validated for any opinion. Must have been confusing for a child and explains my narcs sense of superiority to women, sense of entitlement and selfishness, inability to share their glory with anyone else (outright jealousy of successful younger brother and character assassinations to go along with that), a failed marriage after becoming an electrical engineer with a very esteemed and lucrative position in an established and internationally acclaimed research centre, more failed partner relationships, golden boy loses golden position, golden boy loses possession of beautiful golden girl, golden boy sinks to depression and isolation but continues hunting and obtaining female supply partners who suddenly leave for various reasons but never because he did anything wrong. All of this is hindsight as I go through recovery from this deceitful and horrific experience I suffered at his sadistic and twisted company. The healing path has to go back to why I would even forgive or tolerate any form of disrespect or abuse beyond that of a person with self-esteem or self-worth and perhaps this nightmare (and daymare) had to occur for me to receive the support and counselling that should have been provided to me a lifetime ago but wasn't.
Melanie's so awesome. Her tools and knowledge have been tremendously helpful to me. Thanks Melanie!
+Ryan Fowler My pleasure :) xx
I didn't trust my gut feelings and this caused me constant confusion. The narc would say one thing but the energy said something else. The narc lied so much that the kids don't believe anything told to them, yet at the same time the kids and narc find truth as the most offensive thing in the universe.
True. If you tend to trust that all people mean what they say and actually know what they are talking about, you are trapped in this confusion with a narcissist. The truth starts dawning on you when you realize that on certain occasions they may claim the opposite of what they blurted out with equal conviction before, and their actions are rarely a match to their ideals they broadcast and judge people by.
A lot of empaths are also were abused as children. It was a self protective measure which can manifest an empath. So a lot of this is dead on. Also being around a lot of people are terrible for empaths.
Yeah... I have to be around trees to clear human energy (from other humans) out of my system otherwise it gets too concentrated and drives me nuts.
Chooselove 4all agreed nature helps me a lot. Especially the beach.
another life affirming video thank you. I was terrified that I was becoming like my ex. I did go thru a reclusive period while I was healing and processing my childhood stuff, relearning who I am what I like and dislike, how I feel. This required total detachment from the narc, no contact at all for as long as it took. Now I trust myself. it took time but it's worth it. Serenity is the reward.
+Laurapasternack Pasternack you are so welcome - yes the reward of working on ourselves is inner peace - and from that comes everything good! xo
this is so GOOD! thank you. i have been so so low for so long. made my world smaller and smaller by not wanting to be around people because every time i had those people would somehow use it to hurt me. when i was trying to figure out the world. i chose looking back narcists which confirmed it wasnt safe. i am learning now i have a RIGHT to say "no" and have boundraies. gosh but its so scary. i was really questioning ALL people were narcississts and this is it. i opened up and shared so much to few people trying to use them to share about my pasts, all my epiphanies and it turns out they were just a recarniation of my family and past wounds which again made me feel maybe it was me that is the problem, not safe to be real, thats how the world is everyone is fake, uses one another. i couldnt be this way i just CANT. i have been wanting for so long to be a personal trainer and use what i have been learning all these years but when i again shared these exciting dreams i felt crushed with doubt and fear. just went back into my hole questioning my motives and why i wanted to be that. was it just my empath/codepent self and would i just be attracting narcississts that would suck what little life i had left. but i see now i do have a right, and its possible to anchor and have boundaries. i think whats scary for me is trusting who is real and who is just learning my insurities, etc and eventually playing me. i am scared that i am too wounded and will always have that fear in the back of my mind that they really dont mean what they say. but as i write this i am getting the message it doenst matter or it shouldnt i need to love and accept me first and not look for others to validate my self worth by telling me in whatever way (smart, strong, beautiful etc). thank YOU so so much for this video. sorry for the novel. oh another thing that is so hard is to forgive myself for not seeing it or having a sense that these poeple were narcississts and allowing them to still pull me down. its so hard to not take that as truth. like the common theme is whatever they say so it must be true... then also beating myself up for allowing those types of people into my life to begin with. like there must be something wrong with me for them to ever think they could treat me that way. like i am that transparent and pathetic. i beat myself up for being so nice, smilie, give comoleiments. i just want to be REAL i dont want to feel like i have to always have this wall up and look tough because if i smile its like game on, blood in the water. it just so draining when person after person pulls you down you just feel all people are like this and you isolate, protect yourself so much that you just stop living and years past. then you have to face that reality of remorse and sorrow and wishing you could go back in time. so much given away for people who in the end dont give a crap. sorry for the novel!
I can't thank you enough. It all makes sense. I've set my date, I've gone no contact. I'm going to leave my abusive partner of 10 and a half years on Saturday. I am a strong and wonderful woman and I can't wait to have time for me, to use my energy to enjoy life and love myself as I deserve. Thank you again. You've helped me become stronger.
Aww Bonnie, you are so welcome and good luck on Saturday sweetheart xoxox
Melanie, this is a VERY IMPortant video for those of us who FEEL too much. I appreciate the Truth recitations at the end!! "It is safe for me to..."... You have been one of my top two greatest sources of healing. I thank God for you!
+Heather Germano bless and I am so pleased I could help! xx
I can stand up for others I am still working on standing up for myself. I tend to get very passionate about blatant disrespect.
I agree w/ u 100%. I find what has made me susceptible to my narcissist was that I didn't have enough boundaries, or was unsure where they went, as I grew up w/ a narcissist dad who walked all over the few boundaries I did have, and that I felt sorry for her b/c I felt her pain tm. I very much know who I am but, like u say, some ppl just aren't ready to heal, and that's something I really had to learn to accept in life. The internal work on them can only be done by them, and narcs are to weak to be honest w/ themselves and admit they have a problem so they just deflect and project. Sometimes they give false direction to keep u from leaving pretending they're going to counseling, and wanna change bla bla and once they have u bk it's the same ol bs again. What kept me there was feeling so much empathy b/c Ik she was very abused, and that's how she got screwed up, figuring she probably didn't want to be that way and feeling so bad for her but, at the same time...I should have had more empathy & love for myself. It's good to love & tc of others but, it's important to love and tc of ourselves as well, and maintain a healthy balance. I'm nvr going to give so much leeway to a narc again, or let them in my life b/c next time I'll be able to not only identify them, but also will make sure to keep my boundaries set in stone, and not let them use my empathy to manipulate me. Ofc I want to heal others but, I shouldn't try to do so at the complete detriment of myself, or when ppl are just being fake, manipulating me, and only pretending to recognize they're in the wrong when I leave, or am going to leave. I think now that Ik and am enforcing my boundaries will definitely help me to steer clear of narcs.
So true Mel it’s about trusting in SELF.
Knowing about stuff as a child and not being emotionally heard really frightens little children and gives us low self esteem and self worth as adults.
It takes a lot of self help work to find your power as an adult a constant struggle for empaths between the mind and the heart.
Empaths YES can also stick up for others battles but not so much themselves.
Great post
What you say is so true. As an empathy my covert narc mother absolutely scrambled my brains for years by lying to me. It took me years and years (with the help of your videos) to make sense of everything.
wow what a great video. thank you so much. as an empath this has just blown me away .
+Stacey Marrone I am so pleased this helped! xx
Stacey Marrone aqa
Wow - this is this the most valuable thing I've seen in yonks.
This video is so spot on, it feels like you are reading my diary. Thank you.
I have endured a family member narcissist for 36 years. Things really escalated in the past few years. I unraveled last week and cut all ties. I stumbled across your videos and they have truly helped me to look at things more logically instead of with all emotion. I've definitely been in the cognitive Dissonance phase. And have signed up for your webinar. Thank you for being so informative, clear, to the point and caring.
Audrey it's my pleasure ad I am so pleased I could help xoxo
Oh my gosh, I just realized this is why I am so utterly exhausted after interacting with people. Like if I go to a party I am wiped out afterwards, or if I am at an event where there are lots of people. I don't know why I never made this connection before - of course I am absorbing other people's energy all the time!
Hi Mel. Thank you so much. Being a powerful empath myself and therefore constantly picking up everyone's vibrations and not in healthy ways caused me to shut down in areas where it would be healthier to remain open. The only way I was able to do this was to firmly anchor into myself and create the boundaries that I clearly needed in order to tap into the gift of who I am with the abilities to help others. Lots of love, Helen xxo
Helen, my pleasure .... lots of love to you too xoxo
I appreciate you and your work so much, thank you. Your words are the opposite of "victim" and a clear higher path to clarity. I do not want to keep repeating different versions of this over and over. I want to get to finished with narcissistic learning.
Thanks so much Melanie. I'm now 3 months no contact from an abusive narc. My intuition is kicking back in nicely and I'll never ignore it ever again. I've learnt to trust it even if a person or situation seems ok, if my body is telling me otherwise I'm listening!!
WOW this video describes my Childhood. My mom caused nothing but problems.
WOW, you are one of the few people I have seen that answers your people on your youtube!~ Great job! That is awesome, people that have been are are being abused need engagement and to feel in communication with people that could help them,
+Bluzgirl1 I do try my best!!! I can for latest videos - after that - the older ones it can get tricky!! xx
Wow! I needed to hear this! You pegged me to a tee. Now I get why I've lived the life I have and why something always felt missing despite my truest intentions and sincere efforts. They aren't enough. I scored 109 on the NPD test. And beneath it all, I'm not that happy. The biggest message God or Universe has been trying to get me to see for years is what you just articulated - that of self-empowerment. I can go no further as I am and truly enjoy the rest of my life until I change this. You are a beautiful soul and I appreciate so much what you have said. Thank you for making this powerful video. Blessings!
I absolutely learnt something amazing from this episode. You are an amazing human being Tanya and hope you will carry on the good work. Thank you for saving me and I am doing my best to help others via all that I learn from you and already have helped my poor sister who speaks another language and as a result she is so much better within herself.
+Mahnaz Andrews thank you ... I certainly am not giving up this mission anytime soon .... or ever ... I am so pleased I could help you and your sister. Bless you xoxox
Thank you Melanie - I love the empath message - especially the part about how we can make an astounding difference to the world. Looking back at my childhood and all of my horrendous relationships, I wouldn't have it any other way. Your message has made such a huge difference in my life and truly altered my trajectory profoundly. What you are accomplishing and the way you are serving people is truly phenomenal!
This really resonated with me. Thank you for this video. Healing every day to find the real me. To love and be safe with the real me.
+Chef JessJess gorgeous and perfect!! Well done :) xoxox
I hate that I'm dealing with this...it's been 12 years and I still can't get out of this relationship SMH but these videos has been helping me out alot
+MsSupaBadd1ofakind Then don’t waste another moment of your life. Buy Melanie’s NARP. I did, well over a year ago and I’ve never regretted it. It brought me rapid healing after the end of a narcissistically abuse relationship, six months versus seven years, from an even earlier relationship that wasn’t even narcissistically abusive. I continue to use the healing tools I learned from NARP to this day. Purchasing NARP and joining the NARP forum have been the two best investments in myself that I’ve ever made. The return from those investments continue even now.
what is mind blowing is being an empath (who has had no guidance to develop healthy intuition with this gift) who was brought up by a narcissistic mother and an alcoholic father and step-father. I am now 58 and my parents are deceased, my recovery started about 8 years ago when I began the road to realizing that my mother was in the narcissistic spectrum. I am the oldest (scapegoat) and my sister and only sibling (golden child or conformer) still maintains the status quo of that dysfunctional dynamic. Trying to heal that negative false voice of condemnation that plays over and over within my energy.
Thank you Melanie , after a marriage and currently relationship to narcissists/bpd I've realized I actually subconsciously seek them out with the hopes that I can use my empathy to understand and heal grow with them which is entirely impossible , Thank you for this it is much needed wisdom , and the Mantra ....perfect
I was a very sensitive child and remember spending time in my closet and day dreaming to get away from the abuses in my home. I am tuned into everything going around me. I have learned to trust my gut feeling, and am an extrovert love being in crowds as long as the energy is positive, I don't like when I get mixed into someone else's negative energy or if someone is intoxicated.
Yes, I am an empath and have been connected to a narcissist for years, I catalogued all the behaviors but until the behavior turned toward me did a light bulb come on! I feel so naive ;( I now have to deal with being a target. Once I wakened she saw me as unpredictable and a threat. Because I energetically started to move away from what I was, I started to move toward safety no matter the circumstance, I found the universe inside myself, started doing mindfulness. I've been curious when triggered and started to take my power back. I became the target all of the sudden. It was an energy shift. I've started to heal. Thank you for being here! xx
Wow I went through a similar path with my ex narc...
Thank you so much for this video! This is exactly what I need as an empath. I am currently recovering from a destructive relationship with a narcissist, even though we broke up two and a half year ago. I didn't realize I had such deep inner traumas until a while after. So now I do tons of shadow work and I'm going to apply your tools to end my susceptibility to narcissists. To realize that I am a codependent was the time when everything in my life made sense. I thought I was going crazy, not knowing what was happening and why I was so emotional and life was so hard all the time and why all of my relationships were not satisfying or meeting my needs at all. Thank u for this video! It will definitely be helpful since I've been wondering how to recover from codependency specifically.
As an; Intuitive Empath who JUST got out of a 21 month relationship with my Twin Flame (who is a Covert Narcissist), this was SO needed! I have been amerced in your; video's, BLOG's and information for DAYS. I am a bit overwhelmed with all the amazing information and I am trying to be kind and pace myself. I, like you, almost didn't make it. Lot's of demonic and reptilians, trying to extinguish my LIGHT! My TF Covert Narcissist ALMOST got me, he almost brought me down! Thank you Mel
Carol, you are so welcome. Hun if you really want to heal, truly take the dive into my inner transformational resources - that's where the REAL juice is for your amazing recovery. Its your time! www.melanietoniaevans.com/freecourse xoxox
@@MelanieToniaEvans I signed up for it about 5-6 days ago and have been receiving your daily e-mails. I signed-up for your WEBINAR tonight also. Love and Light
Have been so down on myself for my emapathic ways, this helped immensely in accepting myself and well on my way to detaching. Thank you.
+James Birch you are very welcome, I am pleased this helped! xx
Likewise, I've always known I was an empath, Just didn't realize the flaws of it. You have opened my eye's to something that was staring me in the face!
This was extremely empowering for me, the affirmation/prayer at the end nearly brought me to tears. Bless you!
yaas girl so good. Spiritual eleganza realnesssss
Thank you Melanie. This video has really helped me shift how I see myself and others' opinions of me - for the first time ever I'm actually able to choose to not care what other people's opinions are and have confidence in my own ones over theirs!
I love the empath's declaration. Have written it down to read out daily. Very powerful & confident words. Thank you !
Blessings,
Liliane
You are so very welcome Liliane. I'm so glad this helps. Love and blessings xoxox
true. Fortunately, I'm an empath with boundaries. I'm not afraid to let someone have it if they deserve it.
Your best video ever! Thank you so so much, I will watch it often do that the message really sinks in. big hug
+Kleank Barcelona My pleasure
I've never doubted what I felt and knew but Leaning what to do with the energy and truth's were my issue it kept me disturbed but now many years later I navagate my self with this empath gift...the NPD relationship was very challenging since I was clueless but my prayers gave me miraculous clarity to connect the dots about his presence affecting me and turning my life upside down any many many ways it was like syfy experience... Omg!!!
6mos was enough... I'm free of that person but with your help I'm evolving towards true personal freedom as a codependent emotionally traumatized by my mother and abandoned by my biological father....
Thank you so very much!!!😇😇😇
I wanna so thank you for putting this out Melanie.I read so may articles and watched countless programs and videos about narcissistic abuse but none of them came near to putting it like you do, you break it down intellectually and you don't miss on anything! I just stumbled upon your channel a few days ago after 4 months of battling to heal from a not so long but damaging enough narcs relashionship. Listening to you talk about it made me find the missing links and connect the dots. I feel wonderful :)You mentioned that you wrote an article about the subject of this specific episode but I can't find the link. Do you mind posting it again please? Thank you again and keep on thriving :)Mounia
I love what you said about showing up whole, and radiant first; so that then we can go on to help others. That meant a lot to me. I am loving and believe I am hear to heal others. I want to continue to work on myself 1st. Thank you so much for your help and healing♡
After much soul searching-I have concluded that I am not an empath and, thus, my brush with a narc was a relatively brief one. I cannot imagine how hard it would be to tangle with a narc when your whole soul wants only to please them and receive validation from them.
This is such an insightful and helpful video!
I so relate to this being an empath as an infp healer type (from mbti personality types). I do feel that my purpose is to heal the collective consciousness and this completes me...thank you for helping me bring myself back to my purpose
The most difficult word that I had to learn how to say was the word "NO"because I felt that I had to do, I had to help, I had to be there for somebody. I know now sometimes I need to recharge my own mind and just say NO, or I am no use to anyone and therefore I can not help with their healing.
This video is everything that I need right at this moment as I am in the middle of confronting a narcissist who I was in a business partnership with me. All that you said and shared in this video is really helping me to navigate. Thank you so much.
Hope it went okay! :) ♥♥♥
"dancing around their wounds not getting our needs met" pure truth with regards to empaths
you channel? that explains why your stuff on" importance self love" is cutting edge and has extra truth in it
Yes Mamiya I do - it is like taking dictation xoxox
You are right Melanie. Impossible for anybody to please everybody at the same time. Not easy to be human sometimes. But it helpes to remind ourselves we are just humans and everyone probably do the best with what they got. Thank you
This was very helpful! I tend to be very intuitive and usually trust my gut but when dealing with husband (soon to be ex) I constantly second guessed myself! He twisted everything into knots and just pounded away at things until I was worn out and didn't have the energy to keep fighting. Unfortunately, I would end up agreeing (because it was easier than fighting) and this did NOT serve me well. After years and years I "stood up for myself" in unhealthy ways. I became unconscious and it bit me in the back side and tore me apart. I'm working your program now and I can't begin to express my appreciation to your channel and information that you share. xoxoxox
Empowering and affirming. I have been doing alot of this work already but its great to have affirmations to the process of showing up authentically . Thanks for all your hard work.
Awesome!! Thrive on Dear One xoxox
Hi Melanie, thanks so much for this video and information. Whilst I certainly recognise myself in here, I also see my 8 year old son in here too. I have been teaching him since he was 4 about quantum energy and trying to help him develop a healthy relationship with his inner wisdom rather than making the same mistake I did - looking outside myself. Im always keen for your wisdom on co parenting with a narcissist. As a conscious parent, the last thing I want is to watch my son emulate either his father or his co dependent partner. - valuable material as always, thanks so much x
+Jen Pettigrew you are so welcome, bless :) xxx
Brilliant ! I wish you could help our children at an early age... math , reading, writing, YOU !!!!
Talk about hitting the nail on the head about empaths childhood
Very appropriate in-puts! Thanks so much, Melanie, God bless you in your onward task and journey! You have literally hit the nail on the head with your latest videos!
Favorite part: Being (healed and thus) Radiant, Truthful. & Authentic. Narcissist shows incongruities... Response: You're not healthy to be with & walk away. xx Thank you :)
My pleasure Amber - I am so pleased this resonated with you xoxox
Thank you so much for all of the information you put forrh to the world. you are amazing!
I have been drawn to narcs and been a stand out target for them most of my life.
I never even knew what a narcissist was. or why I continued to from 1 abusive relationship to another....... Until I rcvd an email from you.
your teaching brought such revalations! unbelievable.
Thank you. I love you sister. You are a warrior angel.
That was so me, 100%. Wow, I'm just stunned. Like you were talking about me. I would even have visions in my dreams that would come true. I predicted (in my dreams) all the events in my life. Even about what the nark was doing behind my back, all of it. If I have only trusted my feelings and visions I wouldn't even marry the nark, let alone stay 15 years. Thank you so much. I felt like I wasn't self love deficient or codependent as I would rather be alone than with someone who is not treating me with love and respect. Covert nark picked up on that and pretended he adore me until the mask fell off. I was so overwhelmed with feeling all the energies too and everyone pain and since I started your program and in general working on my self I feel like not everything and everyone is my responsibility. I stopped feeling energies other people experience and I just stay with my own energy. I thought to my self, this is how regular people feel? amazing! This video was so important to me. Thank you❤️❤️❤️ love from Rene
So much love to you Rene and I am so pleased that you broke through with NARP. Awesome that you are doing so well! xoxo
Thank you for your insight. So helpful to really see what's obvious, but not so much to the naive. Sorry for anyone that goes through this.
Very insightful, thank you Melanie 💕
+Lisa Frost my pleasure!
The more I listen to these talks the more I learn. Such good psychological observations with so much truth in the words. Thank you so much for these brilliant videos. (Upleveller)
You literally just described me to a T Melanie. I absolutely cannot wait for the next webinar.
This is amazing Melanie - OMG. It makes it so much easier to understand myself.
Thank You Melanie! It's incredible how your message resonates with me.. and it's a relief in a way.. because now I know what's "wrong" with me.. and it's good to know I am not alone and there's a way to transform, which is what I've been doing for a year. thank you for your help Melanie :)
+glesiaful my pleasure and I am so pleased this video helped! xx
So great Mel. As an empath I have had to learn about setting boundaries denied me as a child, and agree with your wisdom on this.
you just gave a 100% accurate description of me. I'm finding your videos very insightful, thank you
This is so cool! Thanks for the beautiful mantra, Mel! In the spirit of divine love, Val
Thanks Melanie Tonia Evans for your message.
Thank you for the insight of the childhood of an Empath, very helpful and insightful! Some other communities would call this the gift of mercy...I am not sure what you mean though about "being in your own body". You said that a lot...I guess I need to stay tuned...Blessings!
Thank you very much for the reasoning in different areas here. I only realized I am an empath a year and a half ago, and a co-dependant a few months ago. I like what you mentioned about flying monkeys because it's so true. I still have a lot of healing to do because it don't want to be bitter from my experiences or always be in fear mode of attracting them. I have utilized some methods to test people if I think something isn't right with their energy, but I know by fully healing myself, they won't even want to be in my company I'm sure. xo
You are amazing! Thank you so, so much :) you have definitely shed light on a few things I was still trying to find out! I didn't even know I was empath, once again thankyou so much for this insight! Truly amazing and I hope others who have difficulties in life may find this video and be guided towards true happiness as I'm currently in midst of figuring out life's truer high purpose :) lots of love to you all out there having a hard time or those seeking something in life! Happiest of days to you all :)
Awww thank you HAD3S, happiest of days to you too!! xoxox
Thank you SO much for all your videos, for your website. I feel like I am awakening... like I've been asleep and now things are making sense. I appreciate you so much! Thanks again! Susan
You are so very welcome sweetheart. I am very happy that I can help. Love and blessings xoxox
I appreciate your kind, sensitive, and insightful heart! Bless you!
I'm so glad I can help. Love and blessings dear lady xoxox
Such powerful work. Thank you.
thank you for the awesome information you are sharing, you are such a beautiful soul. i listen to you and feel so understood and right. you are giving voice to my deepest thoughts and emotions. that is the most empowering thing ever.
i will be sending you an e-mail soon, where I would like to share with you some of my thoughts of gratitude on how much you have helped me along my way. especially in crucial moments around narcissists, when i needed clarity and perspective.
you are awesome and your light is brighter than you may be aware of, as its heals whatever it touches❤
This is awesome, gives me a new perspective, and in helping know where I need to do the work.
Such a powerful message and so, so crystal clear. Thank you so much!
Wow, this is totally my case, thank you for this great video!
Thank you so much for all of the information. U? are amazing!
I have been drawn to narcs and been a stand out target for them most of my life. 9p
I never knew what a narcissist was. or why I continued to from 1 abusive relationship to another....... Until I rcvd an email from you.
your teaching brought such revelation's! unbelievable.
Thank you. You Melanie are a warrior angel.
I love you sister.
Outstanding healing video. Thank you! ☀️
Really good stuff. THANK YOU, Melanie!
Hey Melanie - I've watched a few of these, and I really think that this might be your best talk yet, maybe ever! Wow - you're saying it just like it is, just like any fully-aware animal would and does - Cats, Dogs, Birds - they all know this, and we can too if we just spend some time in natural settings, get in touch with the Earth and stay open to the life energy. Somewhere in between the empath and the narcissist is the way ahead... Mahalo!
Great!! Drowning was such a good analogy
Great videos. However, a thought on the "flying monkey" term is - many of those F. M. did damage and even actively chose to do damage. So in my life there WERE F.M. who acted in a self-righteous, entitled way to support the Narc. and gave me NO credit or thought even though they knew me as well and purposely chose to help the Narc act out on me or after he did . They were very quick to turn on me and defend the abuser! They are also people who are wounded themselves and don't want to see the truth. While I can have empathy for them, they also have to take responsibility for their actions (which none have). It would be like saying, you can't call some one a co-dependent, even though they clearly act like one. So I do and will use the term Flying Monkey. I was not a flying monkey in my relationship with the NARC. I acted like a co-dependent though and have had to unravel why that was so. Just as a F.M. needs to unravel why they were so quick to put on blinders and defend the Narc! And even though I don't like saying that I was a co-dependent or be identified at that time as one in my life. That's how I behaved! What isn't being acknowledged is the F.M's are INVESTED in seeing the Narc a certain way. And F.M's have major work to do too! The Narc, the co-dependent, the F.M.'s are all separate units of the same sick relationship to making the Narc system work.
I agree with what you are saying hun ... Maybe this video will help Cherly th-cam.com/video/6-s15B3dEmI/w-d-xo.html xoxox
I get what you are saying, emphasizing compassion for the flying monkeys but I still like the term. I absolutely understand a well meaning empath gett hoodwinked by a manipulative so and so. A shock to the system to be called a name can be needed to bring them back to reality. Hard to be all that compassionate on the receiving end, but inner peace comes from doing our own healing. Enablers of narcs are some of the most trying people to have to deal with.
Wow....beautiful message....thank you Mel
This is very enlightening and I thank you so very much for this clarification. Now I understand why I am an Empath and how I can correct the emotional dysregulation caused by it. 👍👍💖
Well done! Thank you Melanie! Blessings.
Thanks very much for this beautiful talk.
You are such an amazing woman. I only wish I had found you years ago. Thank you
Helpful information and accurate!
Thank you Kathryn, I am so pleased you found it helpful and accurate! xoxox
Absolutely brilliant 😊
Oh you are too good...describes me so well.
This so true, thank you so much for this video!
It's my pleasure Siddiqa. I'm so glad this helps. Love and blessings xoxox
until that point I was turning myself into a people pleasing pretzel. It was painful being inauthentic and I despised myself for being a worm but until I was ready to get well I had no choice. finally I got GOD Gift Of Desperation...
PPP! People Pleasing Pretzel! Love it!
Thank you. I needed to hear just this message tonight.
The thing is-I was literally living on boomerang road when I met my narc 😂(Oh ya just gotta laugh sometimes-our other places at Webster and Wall and Warren. Ya just can't make this stuff up!)That emoji is either me laughing or crying-a little bit of both!
I've learned about them and it helps me discover me. Ironic, this life is!
But in my life, not having a full understanding of this gift/curse -has been disfunctional. Obviously.
I've liked, subscribed, put you on my favorite videos of all time list and plan to watch this again with pen and paper. From there I will do some artistic affirmation for the wall.
Thank you!
Spot on!! Great video👏👏👏