I’m 73 and thanks to these wonderful folks I have realized that the multitude of “moral failings” I have tortured myself with all my life are actual symptoms of ADHD. So much love to them both. ❤
@ADHDchatter - you don’t know @Alv5150, they may have all sorts of moral failings! They may choose to fart on escalators and choose to chew with their mouth open!
I spent incredible amounts of money for testing after a lifetime of dead ends and bad feelings. FInding it out so late in life (69) was an immediate source of relief and has led to a longer term sense of grief. I have earned so much about "my people" and myself through you tube. I am eternally grateful to all of the presenters here for the work they do.
That sense of worthlessness also comes from looking around you and wondering how everyone else is able to accomplish (fill in the blank) and you can't.
I feel the same way. I was the stupid, crazy, or lazy one in the family. No one really could help me, because no one understands it. Most of the time you feel alone. I always felt like I was bad, why was I even born if I was going to fail at life. I am in therapy now. I m 49.
And getting tired of masking. Trying so hard to keep up with human and society expectations. Trying your best to find tricks to be like everyone else. It's so so so so tiring. I feel like I was born tired. Like everyone get "how to be a functional human being" manual in their DNA except me.
Yes! I feel the same. When you try to get help from DHS or any government agency, they look at you like you are normal and "why is this normal person here...?" I wish people would not judge by appearance and really understand what we need. We are smart, we just need confidence and guidance. Maybe help with college financing or something $$ a month. People will never understand including our own family.
❤ I think the reason people cry when they meet these two is that Rich treats Rox with more love and understanding than most of us who have ADHD have ever seen from anyone. He really is a treasure! Rox is amazing because of her sincere empathy and endless positivity for all of us out here on our own (and the low self-esteem we carry!). They absolutely are wonderful together and I love all of the good they are doing!
I'm in a relationship like this only were both audhd and honestly it's amazing. Having a foundation of empathy and understanding really matters. I wish everyone had their and my kind of relationship
I'm a guy with ADHD, and I agree. Lots of fluff in the world. I'm only 33, and I'm slated for becoming the most caring and compassionate person I can be. One step at a time. Self respect attracts greatness.
I was diagnosed at 49 with ADHD and Autism. I realised was able to succeed professionally simply because I was an A&E nurse. Im a survivor of extreme child abuse and grew up believing i was flawed, disgusting and damaged and that I could only have a functional life if i gave all of myself to others. My job masked the ADHD; no two days were ever the same, everything was extremely time sensitive and no one questioned why I cried all the time because of the horrors I witnessed on a daily basis. Thank you to ADHD Chatter and ADHD Love (and Dirty Laundry) for what you have done for me xx
Same only, I haven't been diagnosed yet. I've finally started the process. I look forward to being able to get a job and hold it with the help of a psychiatrist. Youre not alone
The way Rich looks at Rox while she speaks and allows her her full moment/voice is SO supportive. They're so great. I LOVE watching their Tik Toks! I relate hardcore.
ya… as someone who has struggled with both 🧊 and booze… #addiction is a trauma disorder so it’s normal for ppl with #ADHD to end up traumatized unless you’re #indigenous you really don’t know what untraumatized ADHD looks like kinda like #autism they’re all so shell shocked but they’re not our culture we can’t reach them indigenous body born in Europe so Pagan Nation 🎰… only other indigenous bodies seem to be able to hear us at least when we’re hurting cause we trigger their Egos rooted in unprocessed ancestral karma they can’t help but perceive us as arrogant and entitled we’ve been using content made by non-indigenous NDs to help break our attachments to them ever hearing us they can’t Spirit says 🚫 cheers #2Spirit #ottawa #audhd #psychology edit: correct it’s called tricking ppl into hearing you it’s easier to do when you yourself aren’t hurting as much as long as the message in the long run is about their healing ❤️🩹 they’ll get over it one day… they just gotta figure it out on their own cheers
I remember few years back after my wife died, I was left alone with 3 kids. I suffered severe depression and mental disorder. Got diagnosed with ADHD. Not until a friend recommended me to psilocybin mushrooms treatment. Psilocybin treatment changed my life for better. I can proudly say i'm totally clean for 6 years and still counting. Always look to nature for solution to tough problems, Shrooms are phenomenal.
I love hearing great life changing stories like this. I want to become a mycologist because honestly mushrooms are the best form of medicine (most especially the psychedelic ones) There are so many people today used magic mushrooms to ween off of SSRI medication- its amazing! Years back i wrote an entire essay about psychedelics. they saved you from death buddy, lets be honest here.
Hey mates! Can you help with the source? I suffer severe anxiety, panic and depression and I usually take prescription medicine, but they don't always help. Where can I find those psilocybin mushrooms? I'm really interested in treating my mental health without Rxs. I live in Australia don't know much about these. I'm so glad they helped you. I can't wait to get them too. Really need a reliable source 🙏
YES sure of mycologist Predroshrooms. I have the same experience with anxiety, addiction. Mushrooms definitely made a huge huge difference to why am clean today.
I'm so very happy for you mate, Psilocybin is absolutely amazing, the way it shows you things, the way it teaches you things. I can not believe our world and our people shows less interest about it's helpfulness to humanity. It's love. The mushrooms heals people by showing the truth, it would be so beneficial for so many people, especially politicians and the rich who have lost their way and every other persons out there.
The brain never shutting up part is actually horrible. Imagine you're at a dinner party, and you start to tell a joke. It's a longer joke, with a bit of a build up, and, before you're half way through telling it, someone interrupts you with "bored now!", or "skip to the punchline already!". Suddenly you're thrown off your flow, mid-syllable, and then someone else says "oooh, I've got a joke!" and they tell it and everyone laughs, then they move on to other topics of conversation, completely ignoring you and leaving you wondering why you even bothered opening your mouth in the first place. Now, imagine that your own brain does that to you, EVERY TIME you try to form a coherent thought, or start a project, or fall asleep. It's like being at a dinner party when everyone is talking all at once and they're talking over you, past you, even about you, and you're just sitting there on the periphery wishing they'd all just shut up and leave you alone.
With adhd though you have to give them a back story whether your telling a joke or a story coz you think if you don’t they won’t understand you have to give all the details, so don’t feel bad it’s them that are being rude not you, in all fairness xx good luck with it all xx
Rich, you’re #1!!! The others were “10 failed relationships “. I’m so in awe of your empathetic and compassionate responses to Roxanne. I’ve been divorced twice after being the life changing disappointment to two men. Thank you for being willing to share such tender scenes with the world. Seeing your respect towards her has been very healing. 🙏🏼
I think I'd probably frame it as 10 "learning experiences" preparing for the real thing. I have a couple of "failed" relationships, but since I have 3 lovely kids as a result of one of those, I can't really look at it as a "failure", because that's a disservice to them.
The big hurdle for me was realising that not everyone with ADHD is constantly loud and fidgeting, that hyperfocus not only exists but is a large part of it, and that there are a whole range of extremities and variations that fit under the ADHD umbrella. It took many conversations with many people with the condition to finally understand this, and I wish I'd known much earlier in my life. I'm a work in progress. Thanks R & R for doing what you do. Live love life.
Because of all that doctors get it wrong too. I know many people who had adhd and got diagnosed with something else, and also some who have something else but got diagnosed with and medicated for adhd and it made them absolutely worse.
Yes! The most eye-opening moment for me was in understanding that there are three different ways ADHD presents and then it’s ALSO on a spectrum. One might just have the AD part, some might just have the HD part, and some have both (me)
I got diagnosed last year because my son got diagnosed. I was very emotional when I got diagnosed. I began to tell people and had a horrible experience with everyone saying I haven’t got it or why does it matter now. I have gone backwards since my diagnosis and now daren’t talk about it with anyone. My employer did not help me. I am now in therapy to rebuild myself. Your social media posts have shown me there is a path through. Thank you, thank you, thank you.
Brene Brown says “don’t negotiate your worth and value with other people”. I found that incredibly freeing - I got diagnosed last year too, and am so relieved to know that I’m not broken. These guys are so hugely helpful! You know, you’re an amazing dad who’s on a huge journey with your precious son and yourself. Keep going, focused on you and your son, there’s a whole new world out there :)
Thank you Roxy and Richard I was diagnosed at 39yo … miracles started to occur in my life once I figured out I wasn’t a broken failure. However My masking and people pleasing is still a huge problem… being happy bubbly the funniest person in the room, super positive is my survival mask of choice. For years people only saw that side of me… it’s when that facade breaks down, you have a bad day so the mask drops and no one has seen this side of you and people your friends react badly and the relationship suffers or collapses entirely causing trauma and guilt… anyone else know what I’m talking about??
Absolutely! This is how I am and as you are I'm also struggling with the same things. I realize I need guidance and be kind to myself, but it's not easy. Sending strength hugs! ❤❤
I am just short of 79 yrs old. And watching these shorts for someone else has mirrowed me. All these years wondering why. Realising I have spent my life masking. Do not underestimate how much you have helped us older folk. I have laughed and cried at myself, grieved at lost opportunities. BUT, now I can get on with life knowing as you have that I am not stupid or a failure. Its too late for me to tell family and friends and I will carry on masking but I now understand me. Thank you so much for being brave enough to put it out there for all to see. May the channel grow so many more, young and old can get some peace and freedom that is hidden from them. ❤
Hello, i am unsure of why it would be too late to tell people but just wanted to point out that adhd goes in the family so if potential children have it they could find out sooner instead of wondering their whole life. Good luck if you decide to tell someone ❤
I'm happy you could come on the journey of self discovery too. I feel melancholic for older generations for sure, (I'm 40), but still it's heartening to see that we can still learn about ourselves as we get on in years. Best wishes to all,
I'm 58 and can, for the first time, love myself as I am...I am not horrible or stupid or lazy!!! I even have the courage to stop apologizing for my symptoms. Thank you Roxanne and Richard, nothing but love for you both!!!
I'm 53 was diagnosed 12 yrs ago...had many failed relationships...then I find the one who loves me for all I am...he has esophageal cancer that has now spread to his lympnodes and getting his chemo next week...he is very poorly...I'm so grateful for the love and patience he has shown me😊
I don’t think I have ever felt I related to someone so much in my life. My 20s were very similar. My 30s are where I sorted it all out. I love this. Thank you for all you two do.
Humongous gratitude to you both for helping me to start feeling self-worth when I'd completely lost my self-esteem and yet again fallen into the dark pit of self loathing. I'm a 57 year old woman who has spent her whole life feeling lost, scared and broken with no-one i could trust to be vulnerable about the demons that have plagued me. Since being diagnosed with adhd and following you, i am slowly learning to understand and accept myself, even feeling gratefulness that some aspects of adhd I wouldn't want to be without now i understand myself! Thank you 🙏 xxxx ADHD TRIBE... STRONGER TOGETHER ❤
I love this couple and their videos. I am 44 and diagnosed with ADHD this year. I’m still trying to figure it out. Their videos are so fun and yet so honest and relatable.
I love you guys. I am 59 years old. Diagnosed at 58. Meds still not completely right. I started watching you around then. I could have sworn you were both ADHD Therapists and that neither of you had it because Emily is so self-aware, and Richard, you are sooo understanding. I love your relationship. I have no therapy. My husband had a day of deep research and now has gone back to blame. My kids are not completely on board. We have a lot to learn from each of you. Also, crazy! I always called myself a late bloomer. Richard! You need to write a book on how you came to terms with a partner with ADHD.
I was diagnosed last year, just on 63 years old, as well as PTSD and depression so it's a triple whammy which I never expected. Watching this has been such an eye opener. Thankyou ❤
Thanks to You, this wonderful couple, Jessica McBain and others, i have finally found help and have been diagnosed at 55. More than 40 years of agony now makes sense to me, and my life is changing to the better ❤️
Did you mean Jessica McCabe, from "How To ADHD"? ( The more advocates, the better, just curious : ) This interview here with the "ADHD Love" people was very heartening. For later diagnosis, or even just recognition that people aren't alone can mean a lot. For instance, from Salon: Dan Kwan: That's amazing. When we first started writing this movie, we knew we wanted to make a movie about chaos and about this overwhelming feeling that everyone's been feeling the past six years. Or 34 years. Or all throughout history of mankind. But when we started writing, we were like, "Oh, we should probably do a little bit of research about ADHD. Maybe the main character is undiagnosed and they don't know it." Daniel Scheinert: Yeah, we were like, "Maybe she's so distractible, she can go to other universes with her brain." But then we're like, "That might be offensive. We should Google it." ( One of these Dan's has an ADHD diagnosis : ) ^ That was part of an interview with the creators of the movie, " Everything, Everywhere, All At Once". ( * Imagination can be a powerful escape and distraction. Much like Rox described her clarity once she became sober, which allowed her chances to build skills to cope better with distress, the beautiful scene when Evelyn recognized her strength was in her developed integrated awareness by the end of the movie... ( She is not broken, she is dynamic : ) -Googly Eyes! Jazz Hands!❤
This is so helpful for elders who were never diagnosed. We often function quite well, thought scattered, until we get older and people start noticing some things/ symptoms, and think we are aflicted with dimentia. Not always dementia. I have had tgese symptoms ALL MY LIFE. It is upsetting at times. Yes, GRIEF & RELIEF. I now know why...
My ADHD diagnosis came too late for my marriage of 28 years coming across your videos and showing my then husband, he apologise to me for all the things he said.
I was diagnosed at 53 yrs old. It explained so much in my life. I was excited and told my mom who's only comment was "its not my fault and i bet you're having a good time blaming me for all your problems" Thank you guys for everything. You rock!
An exact response I got. On top of them not wanting to accept my late (self but getting a professional one next week) diagnosis of autism as well this late in life .39 yro female. It sucks but these videos help so much personally.
That screams of a parent who had their own low self esteem and guilty conscience demons. My mother is like this and it's a pattern I've seen in others NDs. I'm not defending their callous and defensive statements, but for me it helps me cope a little better when I try to understand that my mother has some serious struggles and that is the cause behind her neglectful, often brutal, narcissistic (she's diagnosed) and paranoid behaviours.
I'm the youngest of three, the only girl, and no father in the house. My mother said to me, “Dawna, you never let me love you.” “Oh, that's right, I forgot, it's all my fault.” “Mom, I got my hair cut. Do you like it?” “It makes you look old.” That has been my life.
When i found them 2 years a go, i always thought i will never find a Rich. He most be one in a million. But after 4 years of beeing single and 2 years of knowing i have ADHD i am finaly found my Rich 🙏🏼 They are out there
I remember before I was diagnosed, I was trying to clean up and sobbing. My husband asked me what was wrong and I said that I keep trying but I'll never get 'it' (my life, the house, our finances) and that one day he will give up waiting and leave. And he said, this isnt normal, you need to get help. I was assessed for depression, got that but in the process also got adhd assessment and it's made such a difference.
@@SamStone1964 you can't always tell what the person's intentions are in a quick TH-cam comment. People can say that "this isn't normal and you need help" in a kind way/from a place of concern, and that's the vibe I'm getting from this comment (5Seed, feel free to correct me if I'm wrong!). It's not always from a place of judgement.
I was diagnosed with ADHD at the age of 5, but my parents dismissed my diagnosis. I finally accepted that I needed help at the age of 31 and I’ve been on non-stim meds for nearly 2 years now. My life has had a complete 180 in the most positive direction possible. Thank you so incredibly much for helping me in my journey 😭❤❤❤ I also have always wanted to be a musician my whole life, but I gave up for years because of my adhd struggles. I’m now 32 (Almost 33) and I’ve finished a lyric writing class, I’m building my home recording studio, and I’m learning how to use DAW recording software. Taking steps to manage my symptoms has changed my life. I have hope now 😭
Oh my! I found you both two days ago. I am blown away. Thank you. I am 63 and the wrecking ball of ADHD has just knocked me off my feet. Quite literally. If I had known about neurodiversity when I was younger, I might not have felt faulty, broken, bad and wrong ALL MY LIFE. I'm really looking forward to reading both your books. Big love ❤
I'm 58 not diagnosed, but after 3 of your TikToks I felt Angry. You've helped me understand a package of quirks I wasn't fully aware of. See Dr in 2 days. I also thought "am I the 'basic bitch' of weird old dudes?" Lots to learn, but I can live better by facing them, embracing and laughing along the way. Rock On
Thanks to those two, I have taken steps to get my live right, get help and proper diagnosis... which surprise..surprise is adhd :D before it was lots of shaming, blaming and putting myself down and loooots of broken promises and relationships. Thank you Rory and Richard 🤟❤
Rox and Rich, you're both amazing. Sending a huge hug to Rox for sharing her money story at the end. Every time you tell that I hope a little bit of the guilt falls off. You were tricked and *they* were wrong ❤
I was diagnosed at the age of 32 with depression and ocd, and then I was still struggling with everyday tasks and deadlines. I went back to my psychiatrist and told them that I just couldn't get it together and I didn't know what was wrong with me. They asked me 20 something questions and then told me that I definitely had adhd. What a relief! I was 39 years old by that time and now I'm 43 years old. I'm better than I was, there was a lot of changes that I had to make. I had to learn how to accept that, learn how to love myself and then try to explain it to the people around me. This has been the best thing that I have ever done for myself. I really love you guys and appreciate your knowledge on this subject. It affects so many people, young and older, especially when you are diagnosed so much later in your life. I'm actually a new subscriber to your channel and love your content! You are both beautiful and very kind people, and I see the love between you and it makes me work harder to do a little better everyday. My husband is still learning about me and my quirks, but is really supportive. So thank you, from the bottom of my heart, thank you. ❤❤
I'm now 65yrs old just realised I have ADHD after multiple STROKES and massive work injuries and building our home as owner builder, I have realised that I have had this condition all my life and now trying so hard to deal with it all. You have helped me so much more in dealing with life , with so much thanks Richard and Rox it makes so much more sense now! STEVE .......AUSTRALIA
I’m 56 and was diagnosed at 28. Nobody believed in ADHD back then. I was ostracized, yelled at, bullied, and told I was a liar and that the psychiatrist was a “quack”. My mom STILL says it’s brown sugar! My MIL is just as bad. She is a retired teacher. So she believes that degrading me and maybe a good beating with a yardstick will help! My husband blames me for everything (including his addictions!) and my kids are nicer to me since they were diagnosed with TS+, ADHD, OCD, ARFID, etc. I am soooo thankful for the two of you!! I pray that the “norms” will all watch your videos and learn that beating us and humiliating us does NOT help!
A few sessions in with a new therapist, I said “I’m so sick of being such a screw up” he said, “why do you say that? I see no evidence of that in your life. You’re a college graduate, a home owner, in a healthy relationship. You have a successful career.” And that’s when it hit me. I’ve never been a screw up. I’ve just believed the lies the world told me, that because I wasn’t like everyone else, I was broken. I call bullshit. I designed my life to exactly what I wanted and hit every goal. Even though I have to work twice as hard to get half as far. It turns out I’m actually incredible😁
I have felt so connected to Rich and Rox and Jessica McCabe but never knew of ADHD Chatter. Such a good interviewer! When Roxanne told the story of getting on the wrong train and panicking, not bring able to read the sign, I felt every moment of that! I've been there so many times. We just need someone like Rich to come along, hug us, and give us a moment to collect ourselves.
45:45 I’ve used this exact analogy with my friend who is also adhd. It makes me excited to hear Rox use it-validates my assessment that it’s a good analogy, and also great minds think alike! There’s nothing wrong with us, our brains are just left handed!
The most incredible thing for me watching this as someone with ADHD and Autism, is how well Roxanne listens and lets people speak without interrupting. This is something I struggle with immensely and feel so much shame and embarrassment over. If the conversation is boring, I will mentally check out and disappear in to one of my fantasy world in my mind. If the conversation is enthralling, I will be so excited, and I lose my composure. I want to listen so badly. I think what they’re saying is so interesting. So interesting in fact, that my mind is swimming with so much inspiration and so many thoughts I want to contribute to the conversation, and I’m terrified if I don’t say them now, the points or topic will move on, and I will forget what I wanted to say. I also do this thing, where I get super excited if someone is saying things I agree with whole heartedly, and think I understand completely what they’re saying, but my mind is working so fast, it gets there before they can say it, and I’m desperate to hear what they’re going to say next, and to show how invested I am in their perspective and how much we’re on the same page …..and then I finish their sentences for them and piss them off.
I really do not look at it as a disability it is a difference. Our brains work differently, and most of us thrive on being able to read he room and understand what others need without saying a word. That is my biggest strength
I know what you mean. I personally do feel that in the world we’re in, ADHD is a disability. If the world wasn’t so ADHD-unfriendly, that wouldn’t be the case or at least not as much. I feel like a lot of things could be a disability in the same way, like being a relatively tall person in a world built only for little people.
yeah these two are not ill, she just has a bad memory and drunk a lot. i was told i was hyper as a kid....never let it stop me. its my power. shes just daft. these people need to get on with their lives
Just their statement about teaching people how to talk to someone who has ADHD, hit me deep in my core. My entire life, I've been told, things like: 'just try harder', 'think about how you can adapt', 'control yourself', 'stop being so sensitive', 'stop exaggerating' or 'just be normal' Meaning: that I'm the one always having to change, to make room for others, inevitably making absolutely no room for being me. It happens every time I try to unmask..
Yup. In the same line of thought, in the literal and figurative sense of letting others be, and you moving out of the way for them, and having to adapt to them… I’ve noticed that when I’m in the aisles of a store, I’m always moving out of the way, for everyone and anyone… Like their need to be in the aisle and get their stuff is greater than mine. Or their need to contemplate for a while on their items, is greater than mine… I need to wait. When I’m on the sidewalks or anywhere really, I’m always getting out of the way for others, even apologizing, even when trailing with a huge piece of luggage by myself, I feel like I’m the one who need to apologize and get out of the way, and wait for others to pass… It’s like, WHEN IS IT MY TURN? When is there time for my needs to be enough??
I've heard people say that society is unaccepting of people with adhd and society should change, and in the same breath tell people they don't need medication. Like. They can clearly see that people with adhd are struggling, but then turn around and tell them they're not allowed help. And I just can't understand it.
@@mandyschwartzberg3849 omg the grocery store thing! When I talked to my husband about it he started placing himself in a spot to make me feel more comfortable existing wherever I am to help me out with that. We all need a good partner, it really helps with that stuff because those moments are SO painful for us. I wish we all lived in the same city so we could hang out.
Yes and i HATE how i learned to tell those things to MYSELF. They're fckedup hurtful invalidating my existence things! I think it has really stunted how i let myself be in this world. It's hard to unlearn it, but I've been on it. :) And we need to do it, cos we deserve to be happy and THRIVE! And oh do we have the potential to thrive!!! Which can mean many different things (TRUE diversity and creativity are infinite and necessary), but Im sure of it!
I'm 52 waiting for an assessment, my life been a confusing mess. I've had several breakdowns, been miss diagnosed as bipolar, incorrectly medicated and suicidal after a marriage breakdown, so to say trying to get diagnosed is a fad is missing the point entirely. I never knew what was wrong with me until recently and they're shorts have definitely helped me, thank you excellent interview.
I'm 50 n have been diagnosed severe anxiety,major depression,ptsd,n suffered with addiction,self medicating made it worse.I know i have ADHD from symptoms my whole life . Diagnosed BPD as well but i am trying to find a different psychiatrist n therapist ❤
Thank you so much, I’m 60 & have CPTSD and realising that I have ADHD, I overcompensate by being over organised & having clocks in every room to stop me drifting off into daydreams.
Oh god, I am the same! Clocks in every room…actually, 2 clocks in each room. One old fashioned, showing the hands on a round clock, and one electrical, showing the numbers of the time which also has timers on them.
I'd only seen one of their videos before listening to this. Hearing the period story was very helpful. I always felt defective for having trouble preparing for and managing periods. I've never heard anyone else share that struggle and it's very helpful to hear.
I follow their YT channel, and they've helped me realise my habits that I thought were because of my depression were actually symptoms of my ADHD. Ive spent so long thinking that if I could heal my trauma, they'd go away and I'd be "better" but now i realise they're here to stay and I can work with them instead of trying to stop them. I also send their videos to my husband. 😂❤❤❤❤ Edit to fix spelling and grammar
When I was seeking a diagnosis, my therapist at the time thought it was a better idea to treat the symptoms first (meaning, try antidepressants before ADHD meds.) I was so confused about that - like, wouldn’t it be a better idea to treat the actual problem, not just what happened as a result? I know that these things often co-occur (as a result of each other or not) but I often wonder how many people are misdiagnosed with depression, anxiety, etc, when their struggles are really more about ADHD. I’m sure that the stats will change significantly in years to come, as people realize, and then maybe the medical community will realize that ADHD is a lot more prevalent than they think rn 😕
Long before I was diagnosed with ADHD and autism I got a tattoo. When I read it it's: save me. When everyone else reads it they see: I'm fine. To me, it was and still is how it is. We aren't supposed to be honest when someone asks how we're. NT people expect us to lie and view us as rude for being honest (in all situations not just with how are you questions).
@@SamStone1964I think you caught that correctly. There are a lot of demons out there. A "normal" person would at least pause with respect to a stranger imo
You helped me realise my daughter who is in her thirties has ADHD and later for her to notice the same patterns in me . I’m too old to address it in myself but I want my daughter to be diagnosed professionally as it gave me low self esteem, as my memory reminds me of a sieve, spending half of my life looking for things , being sure I have read signage correctly etc etc etc . I don’t want my daughter always feeling that way and thanks to you guys we can do something about it and show her she is not broken , as she has never been to us .hopefully then she can see herself through our eyes, and she is and always has been brilliant, unique and beautiful inside and out and always has and will be loved , ❤ many thanks 😊
Wow, her story is incredible! As an ADHD sufferer who has also dreamed of being a musician for my entire life, I can relate to her so much. I wasn’t diagnosed until I was 55 and I’m 58 now. I feel like I have lived a wasted life :/ I’m trying but it’s not easy.
Hi, Dr Ben Lynch's book... Dirty genes might be an interesting read for people on the spectrum. Likewise, the connect with the gut microbiome. Blessings..❤
When Roxanne describes herself as feeling "broken" and thinking that could never change and then what life was like before and after getting sober all hit me like a ton of bricks (or whatever it is in the metric system). It all sounds like what I've been going through the past year in therapy. I also agree that being a sober parent is such a privilege to be able to model the healthy strategies that we didn't get as children. There are days when I struggle with sobriety so much, but the choice to NOT drink is always the right choice. I can't ever recall drinking and then think to myself, "yeah, that was the right choice."
I am someone with ADHD. I shared this with my partner and he watched to whole thing! He said it was very informative. It feels so good to be seen and to have someone I love take some time to better understand me. I could cry. Just thank you for this content and reminding us that we are valuable people.
I’m 52, I’ve been under mental health system for 22 years with complex issues. I recently came across Roxy and Richard, which lead me to the pod cast. I have been shocked at the amount of times I’ve said, “That’s me” “I do that all the time” Even down to the double jointed fingers that freak out everyone that I make see it.. The shame and I just don’t have a concept of self respect. Time blindness, I got the wrong year, that I can’t remember which year, till November of the unknown year.. Thank you, thank you thank you, You’ve shined a little bit of my rust. Much respect
I was diagnosed in the early early 2000's with ADHD, ODD and CPTSD as a small child. As I grew up I got other Dxs and now, at almost 30 my psychiatrist was looking over everything literally last month and said "I think they misdiagnosed you as a child, I think you need a new ADHD/ Autism assessment". She went on to explain that she agrees with the ADHD and CPTSD but thinks everything else doesn't quite fit right, and that I just slipped through the cracks because of the criteria at the time. I literally cried because my whole life has been so frustrating with trying to figure out what's wrong and getting one dx and then told "no nevermind that's not right" and then the doctors and psychiatrists reaching for something else. I found Rox's channel and I've been trying to use it to explain ADHD better to my partner and it makes me feel so seen.
I’m 21 years clean and sober and the last 2 years have been the most difficult. I sat in a meeting a while ago and looked at the steps scroll and thought “ this is not helping me anymore emotionally, why after all this time in recovery does my head still not give me a moments peace, why am I still so quick to anger, why am I so sensitive?” When my daughter was diagnosed with ADHD the penny dropped, I had been masking my symptoms for years and, to be honest, the steps had helped that masking to an extent. When I was diagnosed the relief I felt was the weight being lifted I should have felt after step 5 that I never experienced. 18 years after I went through it with my sponsor! My view on life and recovery has changed dramatically.
I’m turning 55 next week and was just diagnosed with ADHD as well as had experienced childhood physical, psychological and sexual abuse. I feel this so much from both of you. Both the relief to finally have a name for my experience and grief for not having tools to cope with it as a child. But I can’t do anything about the past. I am focusing on what I can do about now. Like you, I’ve been researching any and all things ADHD and am relieved to find support…a tribe if you will. Thank you for sharing your story. And now that I have tools and systems in place to help me manage it. I’m looking forward to the next chapter in my own story.
12:04 is so powerful to hear. As partner to an ADHD person, it’s nice to hear someone else talk about the struggle of working on yourself to not respond negatively to something you know someone else can’t help and doesn’t mean to be negative. It’s about recognising your own experiences and emotions and that you also need to process some stuff
The biggest Awakening I had was and finally finding out that ADHD is an extremely emotional thing. I was under the impression that my ADHD was all about being easily distracted and sometimes being hyper. But when I started to learn more about it through videos like the ones that Rich and rox put out, I felt a sense of relief to finally understand that I am not crazy I'm not broken I'm not all of the things that I thought about myself and that others may have thought about me. I just happened to have this thing and I'm now learning to live with it. I've also realized the importance of medication and I cannot wait to finally be able to start medication.
It's almost like going back and reparentimg your inner child that their feelings are ok to express and then they can be let go....shadow work...learning that I was disregulated and could learn to control that by accepting myself. I was just telling my husband of 33 yrs that I can't grasp the fact that I'm the mom of this family. We are the ones keeping this afloat..blows my mind, he just accepts it. Hard every day but so fucking amazing.
I worry that ADHD is only seen as a disability rather than a superpower about to be unleashed on New Earth! We're all amazing, never stop revelling in our wonderful creation!❤
My son has ADHD, and I have been watching you, Roxanne and Richard on Instagram. I never comment, but I wanted to say how much I enjoyed this episode. I loved the candidness of Roxanne and could actually relate to her stories; I am not ADHD, I have dyslexia, and I have experienced elements of the self-lathing of not feeling good enough. I will continue to watch and learn so I can support my son in the best way I can and make him feel good about who he is. Thank you for doing what you do.
67 here. I have watched these two for a year or so. It is amazing to see their relationship. I left my husband when I turned 40. When I returned home, I saw a commercial for an ADD drug. I heard all the symptoms and felt an extreme relief. I’m NOT crazy!!!! I have ADD!! You cannot imagine the relief!!! I finally have a name for my problem.
Literally the moment the washing machine came out, my eyebrows flew towards my hairline and I jumped out of my seat, no infinity wash today!! Thanks (for this interview with to Roxanne & Richard)
Wonderfully empathetic pair and thanks for touching on the emotional sadness of how living with ADHD over decades impacts life decisions Great episode ❤
Absolutely loved this podcast. Rich and Rox are two of my most favourite people on the planet 🤩🤩. Watching their content and reading Dirty Laundry has been revolutionary this year and helped me better understand my teenage son, daughter, fiancé and myself. Chuck in the new app, a second book and the fact I’ve just bought tickets to see Rox perform in Birmingham in March and I may just spontaneously combust with over excitement 😃💥😍
Your so brave. I want you to understand that because of you 1000s if not millions of people have been positively impacted. Whether it be by your amazing music and lyrics, or your awareness and informational videos, or your new app. I would not be here physically or emotionally if it wasn't for you. Your music and creative content not only saved my life but made me feel able to maybe one day face it head on and come out to be half as amazing as you are. That is enough for me!!! Thanks for being you. The world is better because of you. Xoxoxoox
Love this couple. So thankful for their vulnerability and honesty. I've felt so crappie for the way i have have been and for the consequences of my impulsivity. I'm also grateful for the realization that it's not just me. There is a reason for it. Thank you so much for this!!😭❤️🙏🏼💜
"Im not horrible, Im not broken, I make sense" That post-diagnosis sentiment feels like a snapshot taken from my own journey. Growing up internalising every way I was different or stood apart, and years of that type of thinking was feeding into feeling more and more like I was wrong or fragmented or aberrant, or something in my past made me twisted. Years of that trauma and feeling like a puzzle without all the pieces. And it was content like theirs that opened me up to accepting divergences in others, which led to accepting them in myself. I hold so much appreciation and gratitude for that, intentional or not, because relief is a priceless gift that everyone can give and receive. ❤
It was this couple right here that made me realize i had adhd and i went and got tested and everything made sense finally they also were the ones who recommended the loop earplugs to me and now i can go to restraunts without feeling like im overwhelmed i am very thankful for these people dearly
What a lovely podcast, i actually love this couple. They help me feel seen and validated like im not a crazy broken human, im just different and that's ok too. Lots of tears shed and laughs made, thank you for this, I appreciate it! Loving the content! ❤
I watched a psyc2go video about women with ADHD and fully related and started studying a bit more and these 2 beautiful people have been an intense help and so greatful for them. I found where I belong.
Crying again❤❤❤ Roxanne HITS my Entire life on the head again💜💜💜 The beautiful thing about the recognitsend. You knew it was going on the whole time.. Now you get to see it in front of your face so you Know you're NOT a Hypochondriac!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Cheers LUV❤
This is a really amazing honest and authentic discussion on ADHD, the struggles and what it looks like in day to day interactions. Thank you for sharing. I’ve bought your book - so glad you did an audio version on audible! ❤❤
62 and yes I ditto the previous comment. It occurs to me that many of my family are on the spectrum. Survivor has been my middle name to myself, my children saved me, because without them I would definitely checked out. Even now Death (sorry don’t mean to upset anyone….people pleasing) is a welcome relief from years and years and years of existing not living, acting and faking it not being authentic 😔 Its ok hope came in the form of a Soulmate like Rich. 3rd time lucky nearly 20yrs together now ❤ Thank you Guys you are awesome🙏❤️
I love you two so much. I’m an adult female with ADHD and every video is spot on like me. Rich is a wonderful husband I’m glad you found him Roxx. All the videos where you theme “what not to say to your adhd spouse” are all the horrible things my ex husband would say to me 😢. Thank you I feel so much better that I’m not alone ❤. I don’t know if I’ll ever have a partner again but I’d o do I hope I get one as patient as Rich. Btw I can relate to the tampon story 😂😂😂
I agree with the interviewer, their videos not only made me feel “less crazy” and shitty about myself, but my partner has really taken a lot from this compassionate ADHD-education. Thank you, all, for helping this invisible condition gain more understanding and acceptance thank you 🙏🏻 ❤
Watching this while emptying my dryer that’s been full for about a week after the washing machine on here reminding me about it😬🤦🏻♀️! I’m so grateful to Rox and Rick for all they do to raise awareness and understanding about adhd. I’m waiting for assessment so finding it really hard at times but the main thing is that the process of understanding myself has begun. Thank you both so much 😭🥹
Did anybody else notice how intense Richard looks at Roxanne when she's talking..., he adores her! And so he should, Roxanne is a very beautiful and relateable woman. I love all that this couple put out, even though I did/do not, have any experience of ADHD... that is, until now. Many things have happened in the course of my 71 years of being, with several likenesses to some of the things portrayed on their many and varid forms of Roxanne's "adventures" through her life. So, thanks both of you for the entertainment, and above all, thanks for the education.
Got my diagnosis yesterday at 42 because of you guy's and Connor Dewolfe too, lol. It's been a crazy decade of confusion about what's been happening with me, thank you so much for your help 🖤💙🖤.
I love Rox and Rich. As an Audhd person, the work Rich has put in to be a better, calm, understanding partner is amazing. I can identify with Rox’s struggles both day to day and emotionally (especially the family and drinking to cope stuff). I am also now teetotal. Which has changed my life. Most of all they are just such a nice couple doing really important work ❤
*goes to check my washing machine* Thank y’all for this episode! Multiple cries 😭 I was diagnosed at 29, so these conversations were so relatable! Realized the “mistakes” and “failures” I had made were a product of being undiagnosed and not having the right tools to cope. Therapy and meds have helped tremendously! Wherever you are in your journey, there’s always more to be done and it’s always worth it.
It's because of Richard & Roxanne's videos on ADHD that I'm finally started to understand myself and the ADHD I've had since childhood. These caring souls have taught me that so many of my personality traits/personal flaws, which have frustrated me so much in my adulthood, are actually symptoms of ADHD. They're even helping me understand my family members who have also been diagnosed as ADHD. God bless them so much for raising awareness on this topic. 💕❤
Thank you for your unending honesty and realness. I laughed in parts and howled with racking sobs and tears in other parts. I’m 47 and have just been diagnosed with adhd and your books and videos have made a huge difference in my life and in my relationship to help my partner understand my “weirdnesses” and have a stronger connection. The part about your Dad really hit me Rox not acknowledging your diagnosis feels so relatable. I haven’t even bothered to tell my parents about my diagnosis because I absolutely know they won’t care. It’ll just be another excuse for my laziness and lack of what they see as a successful life. I’ve given up on looking for support from my family and am just grateful for the support of my wonderful partner and my friends because I can’t deal with the disappointment of wanting things from family they aren’t capable of giving. Also glad you discussed RSD as this is a big issue in my life and currently the hot topic in my therapy. I feel more research is needed on RSD and how incredibly disabling it can be and how much happiness it sucks from my life. I can’t wait for the second book and Rox was spot on with it being what is needed by so many. Sending love to you all and my sincerest thanks for all you do
I'm 28 and was diagnosed with ADHD when I was 18. Until recently I kind of just accepted it as part of who I am without digging much deeper. It has affected every aspect of my life; the good and bad. Discovering Roxanne and Richard has made me so grateful. Am currently medicated, but my goal is to eventually not need to be.
Love love love your podcast as an undiagnosed (as yet) ADHDer, and these two 😍😍 thank you for the honesty, super refreshing and helpful. I feel less of a failure for having gone through so many hurdles and impulsive decisions in my life after hearing these experiences. THANK YOU!
I’m 73 and thanks to these wonderful folks I have realized that the multitude of “moral failings” I have tortured myself with all my life are actual symptoms of ADHD. So much love to them both. ❤
They’re amazing, aren’t they. And you don’t have any ‘moral failings’ ❤
@ADHDchatter - you don’t know @Alv5150, they may have all sorts of moral failings!
They may choose to fart on escalators and choose to chew with their mouth open!
@@FireIceEarthor not.
But those are moral failings ; )
I spent incredible amounts of money for testing after a lifetime of dead ends and bad feelings. FInding it out so late in life (69) was an immediate source of relief and has led to a longer term sense of grief. I have earned so much about "my people" and myself through you tube. I am eternally grateful to all of the presenters here for the work they do.
"...and so say all of us!"🎉
That sense of worthlessness also comes from looking around you and wondering how everyone else is able to accomplish (fill in the blank) and you can't.
I feel the same way. I was the stupid, crazy, or lazy one in the family. No one really could help me, because no one understands it. Most of the time you feel alone. I always felt like I was bad, why was I even born if I was going to fail at life. I am in therapy now. I m 49.
@@pjpat6040 sending hugs 🤗
And getting tired of masking. Trying so hard to keep up with human and society expectations. Trying your best to find tricks to be like everyone else. It's so so so so tiring. I feel like I was born tired.
Like everyone get "how to be a functional human being" manual in their DNA except me.
100% relatable for me
Yes! I feel the same. When you try to get help from DHS or any government agency, they look at you like you are normal and "why is this normal person here...?" I wish people would not judge by appearance and really understand what we need. We are smart, we just need confidence and guidance. Maybe help with college financing or something $$ a month. People will never understand including our own family.
It's bitter sweet, the kindness Richard exhibits towards Roxanne. We should all be so fortunate. Good men truly are a rarity.
He is great, but he knows she an absolute genius sweetheart too that just struggles with ADHD brain😍
❤ I think the reason people cry when they meet these two is that Rich treats Rox with more love and understanding than most of us who have ADHD have ever seen from anyone. He really is a treasure!
Rox is amazing because of her sincere empathy and endless positivity for all of us out here on our own (and the low self-esteem we carry!).
They absolutely are wonderful together and I love all of the good they are doing!
I'm in a relationship like this only were both audhd and honestly it's amazing. Having a foundation of empathy and understanding really matters. I wish everyone had their and my kind of relationship
I wish my husband was more like this, but he's not
I'm a guy with ADHD, and I agree. Lots of fluff in the world. I'm only 33, and I'm slated for becoming the most caring and compassionate person I can be. One step at a time. Self respect attracts greatness.
I was diagnosed at 49 with ADHD and Autism. I realised was able to succeed professionally simply because I was an A&E nurse. Im a survivor of extreme child abuse and grew up believing i was flawed, disgusting and damaged and that I could only have a functional life if i gave all of myself to others. My job masked the ADHD; no two days were ever the same, everything was extremely time sensitive and no one questioned why I cried all the time because of the horrors I witnessed on a daily basis. Thank you to ADHD Chatter and ADHD Love (and Dirty Laundry) for what you have done for me xx
Sounds like we have ALOT in common ❤
This is me too ❤❤❤❤
Me too !!! 47 and xhildhood abuse and chaotic life not diagnosed yet!!!
Same my friend 45 and I've been an RN for 24 years. Its time for some empathy for OURSELVES
Same only, I haven't been diagnosed yet. I've finally started the process. I look forward to being able to get a job and hold it with the help of a psychiatrist. Youre not alone
The way Rich looks at Rox while she speaks and allows her her full moment/voice is SO supportive. They're so great. I LOVE watching their Tik Toks! I relate hardcore.
Yes!!, i agree!!! 😮😮😊❤
ya…
as someone who has struggled with both 🧊 and booze…
#addiction is a trauma disorder so it’s normal for ppl with #ADHD to end up traumatized
unless you’re #indigenous you really don’t know what untraumatized ADHD looks like
kinda like #autism they’re all so shell shocked
but they’re not our culture we can’t reach them
indigenous body born in Europe so Pagan Nation 🎰…
only other indigenous bodies seem to be able to hear us
at least when we’re hurting cause we trigger their Egos rooted in unprocessed ancestral karma they can’t help but perceive us as arrogant and entitled
we’ve been using content made by non-indigenous NDs to help break our attachments to them ever hearing us
they can’t
Spirit says 🚫
cheers
#2Spirit #ottawa #audhd #psychology
edit: correct it’s called tricking ppl into hearing you
it’s easier to do when you yourself aren’t hurting as much
as long as the message in the long run is about their healing ❤️🩹 they’ll get over it one day…
they just gotta figure it out on their own
cheers
He's a good person
I remember few years back after my wife died, I was left alone with 3 kids. I suffered severe depression and mental disorder. Got diagnosed with ADHD. Not until a friend recommended me to psilocybin mushrooms treatment. Psilocybin treatment changed my life for better. I can proudly say i'm totally clean for 6 years and still counting. Always look to nature for solution to tough problems, Shrooms are phenomenal.
I love hearing great life changing stories like this. I want to become a mycologist because honestly mushrooms are the best form of medicine (most especially the psychedelic ones) There are so many people today used magic mushrooms to ween off of SSRI medication- its amazing! Years back i wrote an entire essay about psychedelics. they saved you from death buddy, lets be honest here.
Hey mates! Can you help with the source? I suffer severe anxiety, panic and depression and I usually take prescription medicine, but they don't always help. Where can I find those psilocybin mushrooms? I'm really interested in treating my mental health without Rxs. I live in Australia don't know much about these. I'm so glad they helped you. I can't wait to get them too. Really need a reliable source 🙏
YES sure of mycologist Predroshrooms. I have the same experience with anxiety, addiction. Mushrooms definitely made a huge huge difference to why am clean today.
I'm so very happy for you mate, Psilocybin is absolutely amazing, the way it shows you things, the way it teaches you things. I can not believe our world and our people shows less interest about it's helpfulness to humanity. It's love. The mushrooms heals people by showing the truth, it would be so beneficial for so many people, especially politicians and the rich who have lost their way and every other persons out there.
Where do I reach this dude? If possible can I find him on Google
The brain never shutting up part is actually horrible.
Imagine you're at a dinner party, and you start to tell a joke. It's a longer joke, with a bit of a build up, and, before you're half way through telling it, someone interrupts you with "bored now!", or "skip to the punchline already!". Suddenly you're thrown off your flow, mid-syllable, and then someone else says "oooh, I've got a joke!" and they tell it and everyone laughs, then they move on to other topics of conversation, completely ignoring you and leaving you wondering why you even bothered opening your mouth in the first place.
Now, imagine that your own brain does that to you, EVERY TIME you try to form a coherent thought, or start a project, or fall asleep.
It's like being at a dinner party when everyone is talking all at once and they're talking over you, past you, even about you, and you're just sitting there on the periphery wishing they'd all just shut up and leave you alone.
Uff this was heavy..😞
You are the voice in my head. Its you...this is exactly what it's like.
With adhd though you have to give them a back story whether your telling a joke or a story coz you think if you don’t they won’t understand you have to give all the details, so don’t feel bad it’s them that are being rude not you, in all fairness xx good luck with it all xx
@@emzlou2098 it was an analogy - I don't actually go to dinner parties.
Yes! Auvelity has helped me shut out the noise in my head. I can actually speak and focus so much better.
Rich, you’re #1!!!
The others were “10 failed relationships “.
I’m so in awe of your empathetic and compassionate responses to Roxanne. I’ve been divorced twice after being the life changing disappointment to two men. Thank you for being willing to share such tender scenes with the world. Seeing your respect towards her has been very healing. 🙏🏼
Feel the same. ❤❤❤
I think I'd probably frame it as 10 "learning experiences" preparing for the real thing.
I have a couple of "failed" relationships, but since I have 3 lovely kids as a result of one of those, I can't really look at it as a "failure", because that's a disservice to them.
I wonder if Rich is Morman. I'm not, but I'll convert if he is taking in another wife. 😉
Yes this ❤
The big hurdle for me was realising that not everyone with ADHD is constantly loud and fidgeting, that hyperfocus not only exists but is a large part of it, and that there are a whole range of extremities and variations that fit under the ADHD umbrella. It took many conversations with many people with the condition to finally understand this, and I wish I'd known much earlier in my life. I'm a work in progress. Thanks R & R for doing what you do. Live love life.
Wou! Thank you for youre work
Because of all that doctors get it wrong too. I know many people who had adhd and got diagnosed with something else, and also some who have something else but got diagnosed with and medicated for adhd and it made them absolutely worse.
Yes! The most eye-opening moment for me was in understanding that there are three different ways ADHD presents and then it’s ALSO on a spectrum. One might just have the AD part, some might just have the HD part, and some have both (me)
I got diagnosed last year because my son got diagnosed. I was very emotional when I got diagnosed. I began to tell people and had a horrible experience with everyone saying I haven’t got it or why does it matter now. I have gone backwards since my diagnosis and now daren’t talk about it with anyone. My employer did not help me. I am now in therapy to rebuild myself. Your social media posts have shown me there is a path through. Thank you, thank you, thank you.
Brene Brown says “don’t negotiate your worth and value with other people”. I found that incredibly freeing - I got diagnosed last year too, and am so relieved to know that I’m not broken. These guys are so hugely helpful! You know, you’re an amazing dad who’s on a huge journey with your precious son and yourself. Keep going, focused on you and your son, there’s a whole new world out there :)
Who else cried through the entire episode? ❤😭😭
Thank you Roxy and Richard I was diagnosed at 39yo … miracles started to occur in my life once I figured out I wasn’t a broken failure. However My masking and people pleasing is still a huge problem… being happy bubbly the funniest person in the room, super positive is my survival mask of choice. For years people only saw that side of me… it’s when that facade breaks down, you have a bad day so the mask drops and no one has seen this side of you and people your friends react badly and the relationship suffers or collapses entirely causing trauma and guilt… anyone else know what I’m talking about??
Absolutely! This is how I am and as you are I'm also struggling with the same things.
I realize I need guidance and be kind to myself, but it's not easy.
Sending strength hugs! ❤❤
I've been feeling some major shifts since my Dx. It's literally been life changing.
Yep
I do! 🌟
@@EsmereldaPea, what is DX?
I am just short of 79 yrs old. And watching these shorts for someone else has mirrowed me. All these years wondering why. Realising I have spent my life masking.
Do not underestimate how much you have helped us older folk. I have laughed and cried at myself, grieved at lost opportunities. BUT, now I can get on with life knowing as you have that I am not stupid or a failure. Its too late for me to tell family and friends and I will carry on masking but I now understand me. Thank you so much for being brave enough to put it out there for all to see. May the channel grow so many more, young and old can get some peace and freedom that is hidden from them. ❤
Hello, i am unsure of why it would be too late to tell people but just wanted to point out that adhd goes in the family so if potential children have it they could find out sooner instead of wondering their whole life.
Good luck if you decide to tell someone ❤
I'm right there with you. Exactly how I feel at our age. Hoping to be able to give myself some grace soon.
I'm happy you could come on the journey of self discovery too. I feel melancholic for older generations for sure, (I'm 40), but still it's heartening to see that we can still learn about ourselves as we get on in years.
Best wishes to all,
I'm 58 and can, for the first time, love myself as I am...I am not horrible or stupid or lazy!!! I even have the courage to stop apologizing for my symptoms. Thank you Roxanne and Richard, nothing but love for you both!!!
59...I'm 59...haha, typo or memory? Who cares!! 😂
I'm 53 was diagnosed 12 yrs ago...had many failed relationships...then I find the one who loves me for all I am...he has esophageal cancer that has now spread to his lympnodes and getting his chemo next week...he is very poorly...I'm so grateful for the love and patience he has shown me😊
I hope he gets better 💖
Prayers for you and your love. ❤️
So sorry. Fasting before and after chemo helps a lot. Also look into baking soda (bicarbonate of soda) and molasses as treatment (Kelmun protocol)
Wishing you and him all the best and healing ❤
Much love and prayers for you and your partner from 🇦🇺-a 64 yo w ADD-getting too old for the Hyperactivity…
I don’t think I have ever felt I related to someone so much in my life. My 20s were very similar. My 30s are where I sorted it all out. I love this. Thank you for all you two do.
Humongous gratitude to you both for helping me to start feeling self-worth when I'd completely lost my self-esteem and yet again fallen into the dark pit of self loathing.
I'm a 57 year old woman who has spent her whole life feeling lost, scared and broken with no-one i could trust to be vulnerable about the demons that have plagued me.
Since being diagnosed with adhd and following you, i am slowly learning to understand and accept myself, even feeling gratefulness that some aspects of adhd I wouldn't want to be without now i understand myself!
Thank you 🙏 xxxx
ADHD TRIBE... STRONGER TOGETHER ❤
your not alone
Thank you for being part of the ADHD Chatter tribe! ❤
❤❤❤❤❤❤
Stronger together ADHD TRIBE
I love this couple and their videos. I am 44 and diagnosed with ADHD this year. I’m still trying to figure it out. Their videos are so fun and yet so honest and relatable.
Welcome to the club! I hope you get comfort and insight and can find your keys! ; )
I’m in my 40’s and felt seen the first time seeing their content.
44 year old ADHD sister here! ❤ Sending strength hugs! ❤
I love you guys. I am 59 years old. Diagnosed at 58. Meds still not completely right. I started watching you around then. I could have sworn you were both ADHD Therapists and that neither of you had it because Emily is so self-aware, and Richard, you are sooo understanding. I love your relationship. I have no therapy. My husband had a day of deep research and now has gone back to blame. My kids are not completely on board. We have a lot to learn from each of you.
Also, crazy! I always called myself a late bloomer.
Richard! You need to write a book on how you came to terms with a partner with ADHD.
I was diagnosed last year, just on 63 years old, as well as PTSD and depression so it's a triple whammy which I never expected. Watching this has been such an eye opener. Thankyou ❤
This episode had me crying and smiling , thank you all for your contributions to society
Thanks to You, this wonderful couple, Jessica McBain and others, i have finally found help and have been diagnosed at 55. More than 40 years of agony now makes sense to me, and my life is changing to the better ❤️
Thank so much for this, messages like this is what keeps the show going ❤
Same 🙋🏻♀️
Did you mean Jessica McCabe, from "How To ADHD"? ( The more advocates, the better, just curious : ) This interview here with the "ADHD Love" people was very heartening. For later diagnosis, or even just recognition that people aren't alone can mean a lot. For instance, from Salon:
Dan Kwan: That's amazing. When we first started writing this movie, we knew we wanted to make a movie about chaos and about this overwhelming feeling that everyone's been feeling the past six years. Or 34 years. Or all throughout history of mankind. But when we started writing, we were like, "Oh, we should probably do a little bit of research about ADHD. Maybe the main character is undiagnosed and they don't know it."
Daniel Scheinert: Yeah, we were like, "Maybe she's so distractible, she can go to other universes with her brain." But then we're like, "That might be offensive. We should Google it."
( One of these Dan's has an ADHD diagnosis : )
^ That was part of an interview with the creators of the movie, " Everything, Everywhere, All At Once". ( * Imagination can be a powerful escape and distraction. Much like Rox described her clarity once she became sober, which allowed her chances to build skills to cope better with distress, the beautiful scene when Evelyn recognized her strength was in her developed integrated awareness by the end of the movie... ( She is not broken, she is dynamic : ) -Googly Eyes! Jazz Hands!❤
@@lizhyink5636 Ah yes, not McBain, Autocorrect :-)
💗💗💗💗
I love Roxy, love her and her music and her Adhd. She's saving my life everyday just being out there making me feel seen. ❤❤❤
So true 👍🏻
Amen and so so true ❤❤❤❤
This is so helpful for elders who were never diagnosed. We often function quite well, thought scattered, until we get older and people start noticing some things/ symptoms, and think we are aflicted with dimentia. Not always dementia. I have had tgese symptoms ALL MY LIFE.
It is upsetting at times. Yes, GRIEF & RELIEF. I now know why...
My ADHD diagnosis came too late for my marriage of 28 years coming across your videos and showing my then husband, he apologise to me for all the things he said.
I am pleased you received the apology you truly deserved 💛
My ex still doesn't believe in adhd even though all my sons have it.
I was diagnosed at 53 yrs old. It explained so much in my life. I was excited and told my mom who's only comment was "its not my fault and i bet you're having a good time blaming me for all your problems" Thank you guys for everything. You rock!
An exact response I got. On top of them not wanting to accept my late (self but getting a professional one next week) diagnosis of autism as well this late in life .39 yro female. It sucks but these videos help so much personally.
That screams of a parent who had their own low self esteem and guilty conscience demons. My mother is like this and it's a pattern I've seen in others NDs. I'm not defending their callous and defensive statements, but for me it helps me cope a little better when I try to understand that my mother has some serious struggles and that is the cause behind her neglectful, often brutal, narcissistic (she's diagnosed) and paranoid behaviours.
O M G that sounds just like my mother!
Do we have the same mother?!?!
I'm the youngest of three, the only girl, and no father in the house. My mother said to me, “Dawna, you never let me love you.”
“Oh, that's right, I forgot, it's all my fault.”
“Mom, I got my hair cut. Do you like it?”
“It makes you look old.”
That has been my life.
When i found them 2 years a go, i always thought i will never find a Rich. He most be one in a million.
But after 4 years of beeing single and 2 years of knowing i have ADHD i am finaly found my Rich 🙏🏼 They are out there
❤ ❤
I remember before I was diagnosed, I was trying to clean up and sobbing. My husband asked me what was wrong and I said that I keep trying but I'll never get 'it' (my life, the house, our finances) and that one day he will give up waiting and leave. And he said, this isnt normal, you need to get help.
I was assessed for depression, got that but in the process also got adhd assessment and it's made such a difference.
You need his support not his judgement.
Whenever my husband is angry I think he will leave me finally.
@@SamStone1964 you can't always tell what the person's intentions are in a quick TH-cam comment. People can say that "this isn't normal and you need help" in a kind way/from a place of concern, and that's the vibe I'm getting from this comment (5Seed, feel free to correct me if I'm wrong!). It's not always from a place of judgement.
@@TaraGoodfellow-kj5idGood point, I think you both bring up valid points.
I really hope those closest to you are supportive and understanding!
I was diagnosed with ADHD at the age of 5, but my parents dismissed my diagnosis. I finally accepted that I needed help at the age of 31 and I’ve been on non-stim meds for nearly 2 years now. My life has had a complete 180 in the most positive direction possible. Thank you so incredibly much for helping me in my journey 😭❤❤❤
I also have always wanted to be a musician my whole life, but I gave up for years because of my adhd struggles. I’m now 32 (Almost 33) and I’ve finished a lyric writing class, I’m building my home recording studio, and I’m learning how to use DAW recording software. Taking steps to manage my symptoms has changed my life. I have hope now 😭
Curious what the non stim med is that's working for you. I need something new
@@MamaInTheMitten I’m on Straterra
Wonderful!!!!🎉❤🎉
Could you describe what "changes" inside your head when you take non stim meds?
Oh my!
I found you both two days ago.
I am blown away. Thank you.
I am 63 and the wrecking ball of ADHD has just knocked me off my feet. Quite literally.
If I had known about neurodiversity when I was younger, I might not have felt faulty, broken, bad and wrong ALL MY LIFE.
I'm really looking forward to reading both your books.
Big love ❤
I'm 58 not diagnosed, but after 3 of your TikToks I felt Angry. You've helped me understand a package of quirks I wasn't fully aware of. See Dr in 2 days. I also thought "am I the 'basic bitch' of weird old dudes?" Lots to learn, but I can live better by facing them, embracing and laughing along the way. Rock On
How'd it go eith your doc? I hope it was a good experience!
All the best to you
Thanks to those two, I have taken steps to get my live right, get help and proper diagnosis... which surprise..surprise is adhd :D before it was lots of shaming, blaming and putting myself down and loooots of broken promises and relationships. Thank you Rory and Richard 🤟❤
Am 55yr old, and these two wonderful people have helped me a lot. Knewly diagnosed. 👏👏💜
I got diagnosed at 55, too!!! : )
Well youall have absolutely saved my life. Another 73 year old retiree standing in my kitchen crying with you. Thank you so much.
Rox and Rich, you're both amazing. Sending a huge hug to Rox for sharing her money story at the end. Every time you tell that I hope a little bit of the guilt falls off. You were tricked and *they* were wrong ❤
💯✨💕🤗
I was diagnosed at the age of 32 with depression and ocd, and then I was still struggling with everyday tasks and deadlines. I went back to my psychiatrist and told them that I just couldn't get it together and I didn't know what was wrong with me. They asked me 20 something questions and then told me that I definitely had adhd. What a relief! I was 39 years old by that time and now I'm 43 years old. I'm better than I was, there was a lot of changes that I had to make. I had to learn how to accept that, learn how to love myself and then try to explain it to the people around me. This has been the best thing that I have ever done for myself. I really love you guys and appreciate your knowledge on this subject. It affects so many people, young and older, especially when you are diagnosed so much later in your life. I'm actually a new subscriber to your channel and love your content! You are both beautiful and very kind people, and I see the love between you and it makes me work harder to do a little better everyday. My husband is still learning about me and my quirks, but is really supportive. So thank you, from the bottom of my heart, thank you. ❤❤
I'm now 65yrs old just realised I have ADHD after multiple STROKES and massive work injuries and building our home as owner builder, I have realised that I have had this condition all my life and now trying so hard to deal with it all. You have helped me so much more in dealing with life , with so much thanks Richard and Rox it makes so much more sense now!
STEVE .......AUSTRALIA
I would LOVE A FIXING YOUR FINANCES Book!! It could be LIFE CHANGING FOR A LOT OF US!!!
I’m 56 and was diagnosed at 28. Nobody believed in ADHD back then. I was ostracized, yelled at, bullied, and told I was a liar and that the psychiatrist was a “quack”. My mom STILL says it’s brown sugar! My MIL is just as bad. She is a retired teacher. So she believes that degrading me and maybe a good beating with a yardstick will help!
My husband blames me for everything (including his addictions!) and my kids are nicer to me since they were diagnosed with TS+, ADHD, OCD, ARFID, etc.
I am soooo thankful for the two of you!! I pray that the “norms” will all watch your videos and learn that beating us and humiliating us does NOT help!
A few sessions in with a new therapist, I said “I’m so sick of being such a screw up” he said, “why do you say that? I see no evidence of that in your life. You’re a college graduate, a home owner, in a healthy relationship. You have a successful career.” And that’s when it hit me. I’ve never been a screw up. I’ve just believed the lies the world told me, that because I wasn’t like everyone else, I was broken. I call bullshit. I designed my life to exactly what I wanted and hit every goal. Even though I have to work twice as hard to get half as far. It turns out I’m actually incredible😁
That was profound
Wierd flex
@@matthewdanko4064 Well, I have a lot to be proud of. I hope you do too.
I have felt so connected to Rich and Rox and Jessica McCabe but never knew of ADHD Chatter. Such a good interviewer! When Roxanne told the story of getting on the wrong train and panicking, not bring able to read the sign, I felt every moment of that! I've been there so many times. We just need someone like Rich to come along, hug us, and give us a moment to collect ourselves.
Having recently had an ADHD diagnosis for my young daughter. Thank you for all that you do.
Ty, in tears here. 55 and full of ADD. Can't afford to get diagnosed. Being aware going forward is helping. I enjoy so much Ur video clips. Be strong.
Book recommendation.
Dirty genes by Dr Ben Lynch.❤
Well, due to ADHD, I typically can't sit through this much talking, but I couldn't turn away. Great interview!
45:45 I’ve used this exact analogy with my friend who is also adhd. It makes me excited to hear Rox use it-validates my assessment that it’s a good analogy, and also great minds think alike! There’s nothing wrong with us, our brains are just left handed!
Yeah! Cracking analogy. I've not heard it before, but going to start using this. In the version I watched, I think the time stamp was ~ 46:45.
And I am in fact left-handed lol
The most incredible thing for me watching this as someone with ADHD and Autism, is how well Roxanne listens and lets people speak without interrupting. This is something I struggle with immensely and feel so much shame and embarrassment over. If the conversation is boring, I will mentally check out and disappear in to one of my fantasy world in my mind. If the conversation is enthralling, I will be so excited, and I lose my composure. I want to listen so badly. I think what they’re saying is so interesting. So interesting in fact, that my mind is swimming with so much inspiration and so many thoughts I want to contribute to the conversation, and I’m terrified if I don’t say them now, the points or topic will move on, and I will forget what I wanted to say. I also do this thing, where I get super excited if someone is saying things I agree with whole heartedly, and think I understand completely what they’re saying, but my mind is working so fast, it gets there before they can say it, and I’m desperate to hear what they’re going to say next, and to show how invested I am in their perspective and how much we’re on the same page …..and then I finish their sentences for them and piss them off.
Yep... The struggle is real. Same for me.
Hang in there, sista! 💕
Me too! I’ve had to work so hard not to do this!
Yes! My family hates when I do all of this! You explained it perfectly ❤
I really do not look at it as a disability it is a difference. Our brains work differently, and most of us thrive on being able to read he room and understand what others need without saying a word. That is my biggest strength
I know what you mean. I personally do feel that in the world we’re in, ADHD is a disability. If the world wasn’t so ADHD-unfriendly, that wouldn’t be the case or at least not as much. I feel like a lot of things could be a disability in the same way, like being a relatively tall person in a world built only for little people.
yeah these two are not ill, she just has a bad memory and drunk a lot. i was told i was hyper as a kid....never let it stop me. its my power. shes just daft. these people need to get on with their lives
Just their statement about teaching people how to talk to someone who has ADHD, hit me deep in my core.
My entire life, I've been told, things like: 'just try harder', 'think about how you can adapt', 'control yourself', 'stop being so sensitive', 'stop exaggerating' or 'just be normal'
Meaning: that I'm the one always having to change, to make room for others, inevitably making absolutely no room for being me.
It happens every time I try to unmask..
Yup.
In the same line of thought, in the literal and figurative sense of letting others be, and you moving out of the way for them, and having to adapt to them…
I’ve noticed that when I’m in the aisles of a store, I’m always moving out of the way, for everyone and anyone… Like their need to be in the aisle and get their stuff is greater than mine. Or their need to contemplate for a while on their items, is greater than mine… I need to wait.
When I’m on the sidewalks or anywhere really, I’m always getting out of the way for others, even apologizing, even when trailing with a huge piece of luggage by myself, I feel like I’m the one who need to apologize and get out of the way, and wait for others to pass… It’s like, WHEN IS IT MY TURN? When is there time for my needs to be enough??
I've heard people say that society is unaccepting of people with adhd and society should change, and in the same breath tell people they don't need medication.
Like. They can clearly see that people with adhd are struggling, but then turn around and tell them they're not allowed help. And I just can't understand it.
@@mandyschwartzberg3849 omg the grocery store thing! When I talked to my husband about it he started placing himself in a spot to make me feel more comfortable existing wherever I am to help me out with that. We all need a good partner, it really helps with that stuff because those moments are SO painful for us. I wish we all lived in the same city so we could hang out.
Yes and i HATE how i learned to tell those things to MYSELF. They're fckedup hurtful invalidating my existence things! I think it has really stunted how i let myself be in this world. It's hard to unlearn it, but I've been on it. :) And we need to do it, cos we deserve to be happy and THRIVE! And oh do we have the potential to thrive!!! Which can mean many different things (TRUE diversity and creativity are infinite and necessary), but Im sure of it!
I'm 52 waiting for an assessment, my life been a confusing mess. I've had several breakdowns, been miss diagnosed as bipolar, incorrectly medicated and suicidal after a marriage breakdown, so to say trying to get diagnosed is a fad is missing the point entirely. I never knew what was wrong with me until recently and they're shorts have definitely helped me, thank you excellent interview.
Diagnosis can be life changing. Mostly because of the clarity from understanding our condition /s.
Lovely dog in pic.
@@Plethorality I'll tell him you like his picture 😁
I'm 50 n have been diagnosed severe anxiety,major depression,ptsd,n suffered with addiction,self medicating made it worse.I know i have ADHD from symptoms my whole life . Diagnosed BPD as well but i am trying to find a different psychiatrist n therapist ❤
My boyfriend has ADHD and their channel has helped me understand it so much better.
Thank you so much, I’m 60 & have CPTSD and realising that I have ADHD, I overcompensate by being over organised & having clocks in every room to stop me drifting off into daydreams.
Those are good strategies.
On my God -clocks everywhere. I'm obsessed with clocks
Oh god, I am the same! Clocks in every room…actually, 2 clocks in each room. One old fashioned, showing the hands on a round clock, and one electrical, showing the numbers of the time which also has timers on them.
I'd only seen one of their videos before listening to this. Hearing the period story was very helpful. I always felt defective for having trouble preparing for and managing periods. I've never heard anyone else share that struggle and it's very helpful to hear.
I used to try to prepare for the predictable, but it was still harder than it should have been.
I follow their YT channel, and they've helped me realise my habits that I thought were because of my depression were actually symptoms of my ADHD. Ive spent so long thinking that if I could heal my trauma, they'd go away and I'd be "better" but now i realise they're here to stay and I can work with them instead of trying to stop them. I also send their videos to my husband. 😂❤❤❤❤
Edit to fix spelling and grammar
When I was seeking a diagnosis, my therapist at the time thought it was a better idea to treat the symptoms first (meaning, try antidepressants before ADHD meds.) I was so confused about that - like, wouldn’t it be a better idea to treat the actual problem, not just what happened as a result? I know that these things often co-occur (as a result of each other or not) but I often wonder how many people are misdiagnosed with depression, anxiety, etc, when their struggles are really more about ADHD. I’m sure that the stats will change significantly in years to come, as people realize, and then maybe the medical community will realize that ADHD is a lot more prevalent than they think rn 😕
Long before I was diagnosed with ADHD and autism I got a tattoo. When I read it it's: save me. When everyone else reads it they see: I'm fine. To me, it was and still is how it is. We aren't supposed to be honest when someone asks how we're. NT people expect us to lie and view us as rude for being honest (in all situations not just with how are you questions).
You're describing narcissists not NT.
@@SamStone1964I think you caught that correctly. There are a lot of demons out there. A "normal" person would at least pause with respect to a stranger imo
You helped me realise my daughter who is in her thirties has ADHD and later for her to notice the same patterns in me . I’m too old to address it in myself but I want my daughter to be diagnosed professionally as it gave me low self esteem, as my memory reminds me of a sieve, spending half of my life looking for things , being sure I have read signage correctly etc etc etc . I don’t want my daughter always feeling that way and thanks to you guys we can do something about it and show her she is not broken , as she has never been to us .hopefully then she can see herself through our eyes, and she is and always has been brilliant, unique and beautiful inside and out and always has and will be loved , ❤ many thanks 😊
Wow, her story is incredible! As an ADHD sufferer who has also dreamed of being a musician for my entire life, I can relate to her so much. I wasn’t diagnosed until I was 55 and I’m 58 now. I feel like I have lived a wasted life :/ I’m trying but it’s not easy.
Hi, Dr Ben Lynch's book... Dirty genes might be an interesting read for people on the spectrum.
Likewise, the connect with the gut microbiome.
Blessings..❤
When Roxanne describes herself as feeling "broken" and thinking that could never change and then what life was like before and after getting sober all hit me like a ton of bricks (or whatever it is in the metric system). It all sounds like what I've been going through the past year in therapy. I also agree that being a sober parent is such a privilege to be able to model the healthy strategies that we didn't get as children. There are days when I struggle with sobriety so much, but the choice to NOT drink is always the right choice. I can't ever recall drinking and then think to myself, "yeah, that was the right choice."
Rox's raw honesty is helping me through a tough time. Love these two.
I am someone with ADHD. I shared this with my partner and he watched to whole thing! He said it was very informative. It feels so good to be seen and to have someone I love take some time to better understand me. I could cry. Just thank you for this content and reminding us that we are valuable people.
I’m 52, I’ve been under mental health system for 22 years with complex issues.
I recently came across Roxy and Richard, which lead me to the pod cast.
I have been shocked at the amount of times I’ve said, “That’s me”
“I do that all the time”
Even down to the double jointed fingers that freak out everyone that I make see it..
The shame and I just don’t have a concept of self respect.
Time blindness, I got the wrong year, that I can’t remember which year, till November of the unknown year..
Thank you, thank you thank you,
You’ve shined a little bit of my rust.
Much respect
Right?!?!
I was diagnosed in the early early 2000's with ADHD, ODD and CPTSD as a small child. As I grew up I got other Dxs and now, at almost 30 my psychiatrist was looking over everything literally last month and said "I think they misdiagnosed you as a child, I think you need a new ADHD/ Autism assessment". She went on to explain that she agrees with the ADHD and CPTSD but thinks everything else doesn't quite fit right, and that I just slipped through the cracks because of the criteria at the time. I literally cried because my whole life has been so frustrating with trying to figure out what's wrong and getting one dx and then told "no nevermind that's not right" and then the doctors and psychiatrists reaching for something else. I found Rox's channel and I've been trying to use it to explain ADHD better to my partner and it makes me feel so seen.
I’m 21 years clean and sober and the last 2 years have been the most difficult. I sat in a meeting a while ago and looked at the steps scroll and thought “ this is not helping me anymore emotionally, why after all this time in recovery does my head still not give me a moments peace, why am I still so quick to anger, why am I so sensitive?”
When my daughter was diagnosed with ADHD the penny dropped, I had been masking my symptoms for years and, to be honest, the steps had helped that masking to an extent. When I was diagnosed the relief I felt was the weight being lifted I should have felt after step 5 that I never experienced. 18 years after I went through it with my sponsor! My view on life and recovery has changed dramatically.
I’m turning 55 next week and was just diagnosed with ADHD as well as had experienced childhood physical, psychological and sexual abuse. I feel this so much from both of you. Both the relief to finally have a name for my experience and grief for not having tools to cope with it as a child. But I can’t do anything about the past. I am focusing on what I can do about now. Like you, I’ve been researching any and all things ADHD and am relieved to find support…a tribe if you will. Thank you for sharing your story. And now that I have tools and systems in place to help me manage it. I’m looking forward to the next chapter in my own story.
12:04 is so powerful to hear. As partner to an ADHD person, it’s nice to hear someone else talk about the struggle of working on yourself to not respond negatively to something you know someone else can’t help and doesn’t mean to be negative. It’s about recognising your own experiences and emotions and that you also need to process some stuff
The biggest Awakening I had was and finally finding out that ADHD is an extremely emotional thing. I was under the impression that my ADHD was all about being easily distracted and sometimes being hyper. But when I started to learn more about it through videos like the ones that Rich and rox put out, I felt a sense of relief to finally understand that I am not crazy I'm not broken I'm not all of the things that I thought about myself and that others may have thought about me. I just happened to have this thing and I'm now learning to live with it. I've also realized the importance of medication and I cannot wait to finally be able to start medication.
These two people are just absolute joys. Special individuals for sure.
It's almost like going back and reparentimg your inner child that their feelings are ok to express and then they can be let go....shadow work...learning that I was disregulated and could learn to control that by accepting myself. I was just telling my husband of 33 yrs that I can't grasp the fact that I'm the mom of this family. We are the ones keeping this afloat..blows my mind, he just accepts it. Hard every day but so fucking amazing.
I worry that ADHD is only seen as a disability rather than a superpower about to be unleashed on New Earth! We're all amazing, never stop revelling in our wonderful creation!❤
My son has ADHD, and I have been watching you, Roxanne and Richard on Instagram. I never comment, but I wanted to say how much I enjoyed this episode. I loved the candidness of Roxanne and could actually relate to her stories; I am not ADHD, I have dyslexia, and I have experienced elements of the self-lathing of not feeling good enough. I will continue to watch and learn so I can support my son in the best way I can and make him feel good about who he is. Thank you for doing what you do.
67 here. I have watched these two for a year or so. It is amazing to see their relationship. I left my husband when I turned 40. When I returned home, I saw a commercial for an ADD drug. I heard all the symptoms and felt an extreme relief. I’m NOT crazy!!!! I have ADD!! You cannot imagine the relief!!! I finally have a name for my problem.
Literally the moment the washing machine came out, my eyebrows flew towards my hairline and I jumped out of my seat, no infinity wash today!! Thanks (for this interview with to Roxanne & Richard)
😂❤😂😂
It's just this. Husband is so patient and so loving. It's almost like a miracle to be able to find someone like that
Wonderfully empathetic pair and thanks for touching on the emotional sadness of how living with ADHD over decades impacts life decisions
Great episode ❤
Absolutely loved this podcast. Rich and Rox are two of my most favourite people on the planet 🤩🤩. Watching their content and reading Dirty Laundry has been revolutionary this year and helped me better understand my teenage son, daughter, fiancé and myself. Chuck in the new app, a second book and the fact I’ve just bought tickets to see Rox perform in Birmingham in March and I may just spontaneously combust with over excitement 😃💥😍
Your so brave. I want you to understand that because of you 1000s if not millions of people have been positively impacted. Whether it be by your amazing music and lyrics, or your awareness and informational videos, or your new app. I would not be here physically or emotionally if it wasn't for you. Your music and creative content not only saved my life but made me feel able to maybe one day face it head on and come out to be half as amazing as you are. That is enough for me!!! Thanks for being you. The world is better because of you. Xoxoxoox
Rox and Rich have a remarkable talent of describing things outstandingly.
Love this couple. So thankful for their vulnerability and honesty. I've felt so crappie for the way i have have been and for the consequences of my impulsivity. I'm also grateful for the realization that it's not just me. There is a reason for it. Thank you so much for this!!😭❤️🙏🏼💜
"Im not horrible, Im not broken, I make sense" That post-diagnosis sentiment feels like a snapshot taken from my own journey. Growing up internalising every way I was different or stood apart, and years of that type of thinking was feeding into feeling more and more like I was wrong or fragmented or aberrant, or something in my past made me twisted. Years of that trauma and feeling like a puzzle without all the pieces.
And it was content like theirs that opened me up to accepting divergences in others, which led to accepting them in myself. I hold so much appreciation and gratitude for that, intentional or not, because relief is a priceless gift that everyone can give and receive. ❤
It was this couple right here that made me realize i had adhd and i went and got tested and everything made sense finally they also were the ones who recommended the loop earplugs to me and now i can go to restraunts without feeling like im overwhelmed i am very thankful for these people dearly
What a lovely podcast, i actually love this couple.
They help me feel seen and validated like im not a crazy broken human, im just different and that's ok too.
Lots of tears shed and laughs made, thank you for this, I appreciate it!
Loving the content! ❤
Thank you. I love making this podcast for the reasons you’ve stated. Loads more episodes to come.
Weren’t Rich and Rox great!
Alex
I watched a psyc2go video about women with ADHD and fully related and started studying a bit more and these 2 beautiful people have been an intense help and so greatful for them. I found where I belong.
I'm so proud of them ❤
Crying again❤❤❤
Roxanne
HITS my Entire life on the head again💜💜💜
The beautiful thing about the recognitsend. You knew it was going on the whole time..
Now you get to see it in front of your face so you Know you're NOT a Hypochondriac!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Cheers LUV❤
Diagnosed at 53 in the summer. So many tears watching this. Honestly I feel like I need a year in bed just to process who I am
Love how absolutely accepting they are of eachother not only of their minds, but their bodies.
This is a really amazing honest and authentic discussion on ADHD, the struggles and what it looks like in day to day interactions. Thank you for sharing. I’ve bought your book - so glad you did an audio version on audible! ❤❤
3:42 When Rox says she's gonna try and not make this "a long story" Ugh, highly relatable😅
Rich and Rox are so delightful! I'm a big fan of their content and was a treat to see them for a bit longer than a couple minutes!
62 and yes I ditto the previous comment. It occurs to me that many of my family are on the spectrum. Survivor has been my middle name to myself, my children saved me, because without them I would definitely checked out. Even now Death (sorry don’t mean to upset anyone….people pleasing) is a welcome relief from years and years and years of existing not living, acting and faking it not being authentic 😔
Its ok hope came in the form of a Soulmate like Rich. 3rd time lucky nearly 20yrs together now ❤ Thank you Guys you are awesome🙏❤️
I love you two so much. I’m an adult female with ADHD and every video is spot on like me. Rich is a wonderful husband I’m glad you found him Roxx. All the videos where you theme “what not to say to your adhd spouse” are all the horrible things my ex husband would say to me 😢. Thank you I feel so much better that I’m not alone ❤. I don’t know if I’ll ever have a partner again but I’d o do I hope I get one as patient as Rich.
Btw I can relate to the tampon story 😂😂😂
I agree with the interviewer, their videos not only made me feel “less crazy” and shitty about myself, but my partner has really taken a lot from this compassionate ADHD-education. Thank you, all, for helping this invisible condition gain more understanding and acceptance thank you 🙏🏻 ❤
Watching this while emptying my dryer that’s been full for about a week after the washing machine on here reminding me about it😬🤦🏻♀️! I’m so grateful to Rox and Rick for all they do to raise awareness and understanding about adhd. I’m waiting for assessment so finding it really hard at times but the main thing is that the process of understanding myself has begun. Thank you both so much 😭🥹
Did anybody else notice how intense Richard looks at Roxanne when she's talking..., he adores her!
And so he should, Roxanne is a very beautiful and relateable woman. I love all that this couple put out, even though I did/do not, have any experience of ADHD... that is, until now. Many things have happened in the course of my 71 years of being, with several likenesses to some of the things portrayed on their many and varid forms of Roxanne's "adventures" through her life. So, thanks both of you for the entertainment, and above all, thanks for the education.
Got my diagnosis yesterday at 42 because of you guy's and Connor Dewolfe too, lol. It's been a crazy decade of confusion about what's been happening with me, thank you so much for your help 🖤💙🖤.
I love Rox and Rich. As an Audhd person, the work Rich has put in to be a better, calm, understanding partner is amazing. I can identify with Rox’s struggles both day to day and emotionally (especially the family and drinking to cope stuff). I am also now teetotal. Which has changed my life.
Most of all they are just such a nice couple doing really important work ❤
*goes to check my washing machine* Thank y’all for this episode! Multiple cries 😭 I was diagnosed at 29, so these conversations were so relatable! Realized the “mistakes” and “failures” I had made were a product of being undiagnosed and not having the right tools to cope. Therapy and meds have helped tremendously! Wherever you are in your journey, there’s always more to be done and it’s always worth it.
It's because of Richard & Roxanne's videos on ADHD that I'm finally started to understand myself and the ADHD I've had since childhood. These caring souls have taught me that so many of my personality traits/personal flaws, which have frustrated me so much in my adulthood, are actually symptoms of ADHD. They're even helping me understand my family members who have also been diagnosed as ADHD.
God bless them so much for raising awareness on this topic. 💕❤
Thank you for your unending honesty and realness. I laughed in parts and howled with racking sobs and tears in other parts. I’m 47 and have just been diagnosed with adhd and your books and videos have made a huge difference in my life and in my relationship to help my partner understand my “weirdnesses” and have a stronger connection. The part about your Dad really hit me Rox not acknowledging your diagnosis feels so relatable. I haven’t even bothered to tell my parents about my diagnosis because I absolutely know they won’t care. It’ll just be another excuse for my laziness and lack of what they see as a successful life. I’ve given up on looking for support from my family and am just grateful for the support of my wonderful partner and my friends because I can’t deal with the disappointment of wanting things from family they aren’t capable of giving. Also glad you discussed RSD as this is a big issue in my life and currently the hot topic in my therapy. I feel more research is needed on RSD and how incredibly disabling it can be and how much happiness it sucks from my life. I can’t wait for the second book and Rox was spot on with it being what is needed by so many. Sending love to you all and my sincerest thanks for all you do
I'm 28 and was diagnosed with ADHD when I was 18. Until recently I kind of just accepted it as part of who I am without digging much deeper. It has affected every aspect of my life; the good and bad. Discovering Roxanne and Richard has made me so grateful. Am currently medicated, but my goal is to eventually not need to be.
Love love love your podcast as an undiagnosed (as yet) ADHDer, and these two 😍😍 thank you for the honesty, super refreshing and helpful. I feel less of a failure for having gone through so many hurdles and impulsive decisions in my life after hearing these experiences. THANK YOU!