Much more. I use many of techniques you talked about in this video, too. I have also learned to block out other’s energies. I’m such an oasis, and all these other energies, thoughts and moods started really exhaust me, especially negative ones. So I had to learn to shut them out. It wasn’t and isn’t easy. Still struggling sometimes!
More sensitive! My 6 siblings are all very aggressive, abusive and cold. If I do meet someone who is sensitive, I tend to befriend that person. Thankfully, I like crowds! =)
I am EXTREMELY highly sensitive. If someone snaps at me, says something the wrong way, looks at me wrong, I WILL tear up and shut down, and it can ruin my whole day. I avoid confrontation at all costs and even feel anxious if I feel I overshared something I wanted to keep to myself. It’s tough.
can you tell me the solution. I feel like I really need some solution. plz someone help me but don't tell me to open up to family, they made me uncomfortable to share just anything and friends there's no one ready to listen and also if there's anyone I'm just not able to share a single word, idk how to do this
@@najmussaherOT7 you can try talking to chat gpt first, to train your ability to share smth. Once you're confident, you can use anonymous chats with real ppl, and then maybe friends (if you want to)
I am highly sensitive and I have lots of empathy. People can be draining. I am not comfortable around loud noises and prefer to be in nature . Thank you Vera! ☮️
@@stevethomas74 Do a few public speaking courses. Join group activities even if you feel uneasy. Dont compare yourself with others. Practice assertiveness. Never say"YES" when you want to say "NO'. Develop your mental muscles. Reduce negative thoughts with a simple practice. Your breath and mind [brain] are closely related causing stress-anxiety. For a better life sit on a chair, neck straight, eyes closed and observe the sensations of your incoming--outgoing breath at the entrance of the nostrils for 5-10-15 minutes or more. Don’t fight your thoughts. Slowly the mind will relax. No deep breathing needed. Do the practice without any expectations. Change happens from within by itself. Day or night, when taking a walk, sitting in a park, when reading, before sleep etc sit or lie down and observe your breath. Like me, make this a lifetime daily habit to have a good life. Avoid constipation as it affects the mind instantly. Best wishes Shyaaam Sir. -Counsellor.
Jennie, Do a few public speaking courses. Join group activities even if you feel uneasy. Dont compare yourself with others. Practice assertiveness. Never say"YES" when you want to say "NO'. Develop your mental muscles. Reduce negative thoughts with a simple practice. Your breath and mind [brain] are closely related causing stress-anxiety. For a better life sit on a chair, neck straight, eyes closed and observe the sensations of your incoming--outgoing breath at the entrance of the nostrils for 5-10-15 minutes or more. Don’t fight your thoughts. Slowly the mind will relax. No deep breathing needed. Do the practice without any expectations. Change happens from within by itself. Day or night, when taking a walk, sitting in a park, when reading, before sleep etc sit or lie down and observe your breath. Like me, make this a lifetime daily habit to have a good life. Avoid constipation as it affects the mind instantly. Best wishes Shyaaam Sir. -Counsellor.
@@shyaaammeneen63 I try to do a few of those things (especially the group activities as I love walking so I'm in a few Meetup walking groups). Thanks for your input :)
I don’t know. My best girlfriend had real sympathy for me when she said aw, you’re just too sensitive. She wasn’t like me, , she was caring, but she felt bad for me.
Music is my safe place... I have been able to do live music pretty well, I feel the connection to the crowd energetically. It is getting a little more difficult , I am picking and choosing more carefully.
Sensitivity is good for many things: Creativity, music, art, intelligence, analytical skills, empathy, caring, listening skills, lie detection, atmosphere creation, calming things down, choosing your words carefully, bonding, friendship... the list goes on.
I was venting about being sensitive with a friend, and they said something very wise, "Because you're sensitive you'll be able to bridge gaps that have never been crossed and see things that are invisible to others."
@@soph8164 It's like you're referencing the same research I was thinking about. I think the finding was that sensitive people are better at bridging the gaps, but they're susceptible to burn out when doing so. They may even report that they're bad at it despite being much better than the average.
I am 68 years old, and this is the first time I have heard positive things about being highly sensitive. All my life it has been, "You're too sensitive. Buck up" etc. Thank you for the tips. I feel certain they are going to help me. Big smile.
Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts! I'm so happy you enjoyed the video and found the tips helpful 🤗🌷 Actually, I have an entire playlist about being highly sensitive, with lots of positivity 😊 The videos are quite old but I still like them myself and I think they could be helpful as well. So if you're interested, feel free to check it out: th-cam.com/play/PLpDAC25h6PC8v5bhadp2pKQrK_0e4sd55.html
Thanks for bringing this out in the open for others who have no idea that this is just one way that people are different. Some humans just cannot fathom what it is like to be different.
@@SimpleHappyZen Re. @intigniadickey2224: Thank you so much; this is so much me! I'm even older (75), and most of my life has been making excuses for my 'me' time, and excuses for being overwhelmed, and needing my sleep regularity, etc. ...Very helpful!
I am indeed sensitive, empath, an introvert and also an INFJ. How did I manage to stay alive (I do have anxiety issues) is nothing less than a wonder in my eyes.
I'm a tough person, thus it's hard for me to understand my sensitive friends. Their reactions are often unintuitive for me. I came here to learn and understand the topic better. ^^'
Just the fact that you are taking the time to understand your sensitive friends better tells me you are a better friend than any of the people I have surrounded myself with in the past 7 years. Thank you for being a good person, I hope I meet someone like you one day.
I’m happy to see more being said these days about highly sensitive people because I am one. All my life I’ve been led to believe it’s a character flaw and that there is something wrong with me. When people told me I was too sensitive, I was hurt and angry at the same time. I wondered what was wrong with me because I couldn’t be as outgoing and relaxed as others around me. I wish it had been better understood and accepted years ago so I wouldn’t have felt so awkward and out of step. I was surprised when you mentioned exercise and how it affected you because that’s the way it affects me but no one seems to understand, they say it’s laziness. Thank you for sharing these techniques for coping. ❤️
Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts Carolyn, it's things like what you mentioned that make me think it's so important to talk about this more. :) Take care and have a lovely day!
To me your comment makes a whole lot of sense. I am not highly sensitive at all, but it's only obvious that excersizing can drain you mentally; there is a lot of movement going on in the gym plus there is music, and people talking. One might drop a dumbell or whatever which only adds to the overall sound overdose. I do workout regularily, and all these things I've described above don't bother me at all, but it's only logical that it does this to you, and that is no laziness at all. It can only be said as laziness by people who want to tease you, who only see the negative, or who simply don't understand you, which often happens if these people are way different than you are. If you ask me, there's nothing wrong with being sensitive or highly sensitive. But because it is an extreme trait (hence the word 'highly') it is only obvious that these things affects you equally extreme. No wonder you're hurt by what these people say to you. On the other hand I can only imagine the benefits of being highly sensitive: I bet you can love much deeper and feel those positive emotions way more than people who are not as sensitive as you are. And that is something I hope you treasure in yourself. :) And even people who are not highly sensitive - such as myself - can still understand you by at least taking you serious. I hope this message helps you somehow.
@@Leto85 What a kind, empathetic comment! Even though your comment wasn't directed toward me, I appreciate your kindness. There are such lovely people in the world such as yourself!💚
Wow, growing up as a sensitive man in slavic country was very confusing, I would always think that there is something unacceptable about me when around people. Something that I need to change for good. Then I realized, that I just need to take different approach to life than most people.
I’m 58 years old and I hear “you are too sensitive” I recently respond “God made me this way.” Loud noises gets under my skin and I can’t even think. I love being in nature. The news, sad, violent movies effects me for days and sometimes weeks. Subbed. Thank you for sharing.
Everything you said I can relate to. I have seen something on the news and went to bed and woke up the next day with tears in my eyes. I’ve read other stories and went to my son crying about a story I just read about an animal. I love nature as well. It’s so calming. I have recently been thinking something is wrong with me. Sometimes I cry so easy and I hate that. But Vera is such a help to explain all this. It really helps. Good luck to you. Thanks for sharing your story.
I still remember how upset I was when I saw my first violent movie many years ago….Pork Chop Hill…at age 12. I always wondered why it upset me so much. Through the years I have learned to avoid all such things. Can’t do it!
I've learned to hide how I feel. Growing up, I was always treated as a drama queen for being so sensitive. Nowadays, however bad I feel, I look calm and composed on the outside. I don't even care to show how I feel anymore. Why talk in a world where no-one listens? I can't wait to have kids of my own. I will shower them with all the love and kindness that I can give. At least someone will benefit from my sensitivity.
Good for you…..When my sons were born I finally had someone to love who would take me as I am and not make me feel put down all the time. I did everything I could to raise them the opposite of what I went through as a child. Both of my sons have done very well in their adult lives. What a blessing they have been to me.
I’m an empath with an anxiety disorder. I’ve been trying to learn how to keep myself grounded for years. My son is 6 and he’s exhibiting the same “overly" sensitive and anxious traits I did growing up. I’m hard on him sometimes because i don’t want him to be an anxious mess like me, but this video really helps change my perspective - that being sensitive isn’t a personal flaw. I think I need to sit down with him and talk about real coping mechanisms instead of getting upset when he’s being my mirror.
Thank you for sharing your experiences! I think what you said about talking and discussing coping mechanisms sounds great. Also, Elaine Aron also has a book called The highly sensitive child. I haven't read it myself, but it might be helpful for you. Take care!
I suggest that you fix your relationship with him first then you start teaching him about what can help him , you can't be punishing someone for something you do it yourself especially that he's a child of yours because children tend to to learn more from their parents and the environment they grow up in . Being anxious is already a load itself being hard on him WILL just ADD to his anxiety which is something you must know it yourself . also being hard on someone no matter what problem they might have is not a solution unless they decide it for their selves and that's a fact you cant deny if you're wondering why I'm speaking , I'm already suffering from anxiety and and a high sensitivity person with a condition called hyperhidrosis , my mother is a nervous person who can get mad on anything .i think that's enough for me to talk about this . and I really hope you fix what's between the two of you.
Dear Passa Cookie…you are not alone! I am also a highly sensitive anxious mom raising a little boy who is my carbon copy! I am hard on him too sometimes. I know exactly how feel about not wanting him to be an anxious mess. I have taught him about being highly sensitive and how it’s not a flaw. I also try to balance out times when I may be too hard or critical with being extra kind and snuggly with him. He is a big time snuggler and getting lots of hugs or laying down next to him at bedtime seems to cancel out the times I’ve been too tough. And apologizing when you’ve hurt his feelings is a good thing too!
I mean I'm sorry but how the fuck can you be an empath and be hard on your son for showing signs of anxiety? I mean wouldn't a supposed empath understand that treating a child with anxiety harshly because of their anxious traits isn't a very empathetic or helpful way to go about it? How did it ever help you for example?
@@NinjaOutfitInTheWash Your comment is why I don't usually comment on videos. I'm an overwhelmed parent with two kids on the spectrum doing my best and recognizing that I can do better / actively working on doing better. Instead of acknowledging that or sounding concerned or offering advice, you jump down my throat for a situation you don't know anything about except for my overly simplified description. By "being hard on him" I mean constant nagging (not screaming or hurting my child). When he's exhibiting anxious tendencies, they don't always come across as "being anxious," so it's hard to identify. Lift people up instead of putting them down.
I have struggled with low self esteem most of my life, and I believe much of it stemmed from feeling out of place and different. I’ve been told to toughen up since I was a kid. Only recently have I begun to understand who I am and more importantly be ok with it. Thank you so much for videos like this! They are little confidence boosters.
Boundaries are often underestimated, but I've come to realise that they're a real boon to up your confidence and self respect in situations that make you uncomfortable.
I agree that arriving early and traveling the less hectic route are so helpful. I have always known this works better for me. I hate being rushed. I love meeting with one or two people but not a large, noisy group. I've always felt I build strong friendships because I am fully present with the people close to me. Your video is validating that there are pluses to having these characteristics. Thank you!
Good advice. I’m an introvert. Being in loud social situations with lots of talking wears me out.I have to decompress afterwards. Thanks for the helpful tips!
Yes, decompress! That's the word I'm trying to say but couldn't find it. Thank you for sharing. 😂 If I attend a party or an intense discussion or meeting, it would take even days to decompress 😢
I'm a hsp as well, and what drives me crazy is loud noises, fast and intense talkers, fast paced lifestyle that is surrounding me in a City, modern mainstream garbage music, traffic, strong smells, bad news, violent movies, when people rush me, and the list goes on... What helps me though, is trying to live a simple and minimal life, sleeping at least 8 hours a night, going on walks regularly in nature to recharge, where "few" people go. Trying to eat more healthy, even though that can be super challenging since the bad stuff is comforting and tastes yummy, lol... I try to be organized, prepared and tidy, but i'm still working on that and have a long way to go... I take earplugs with me everywhere I go, so if it gets too noisy I put them in, especially when I'm shopping. Even though I try to go shopping during less busy times, like evenings when most people start getting ready for bed, lol... I even put ear plugs in sometimes when my loud and intense speaking neighbours babble or when my family get together... They make joking remarks and give me the look, like I'm not ok upstairs, lol... I find oldies, classic, soft jazz & spa music soothing... Being around positive, soft spoken and down-to- earth people is a plus for me when I am around people... But the majority of people don't understand me, and I find it difficult to make deep friendships, because I just don't click with most people, and Vice Versa. I can tell that according to them there's something wrong with me, but at least now I'm learning to accept myself as I am. And a few deep friendships that I can count on one hand is more than enough for me anyway...We hsp do have many positives too, so it's not all bad! 😊🌿
The survival kit really resonated with me! ❤️ It's been a journey for me to accept that I need to have a snack at hand whenever I go out. I simply cannot function if my blood sugar is low, and it can drop quite suddenly. The same goes for accepting that I'm a slow eater. I need to chew my food well. I still have some shame around it, but it has gotten better. It's just that the world is not built for people like me, and there are days when every little inconvenience reminds me of that. I continue to assure myself that I'm not the problem and there are people who love me as I am 🙏 It's so weird that I have carried this shame my whole life, needing food and being slow is literally just HUMAN.
Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts and I agree about accepting yourself as you are, and doing the things that you need to feel good :) There's absolutely no problem there. Take care my friend!
Thank you for the tips! As a sensitive guy, I certainly feel things deeper. It can be exhausting but on the other side, being sensitive means that I am not afraid to be vulnerable and can make long lasting friendships :)
Thanks so much Vera. I am an INFP and HSP and am in the middle of some horrible discussions with a company I’m dealing with, so very depleted. It is good to be reminded of our community of separate people 🙂
Hi Judith, thank you for sharing your thoughts. I'm sorry to hear you're going through a tough time with your work, I can imagine it must be a lot to deal with. Take care and take lots of self care breaks!
I have grown to avoid and sometimes detest people who speak down on me for being sensitive. It goes beyond lack of understanding. They can be hurtful, which only makes me more sensitive.
Excellent video....very helpful! I'm 62 years old, highly sensitive and just watching this has me crying! How many times I heard over the years that I am "overly" sensitive. I even yelled at my mom as an adult....why are you always trying to change me? I also get ....you are so defensive....now I know why! It's exhausting!
One of the things that i have learned, over many decades, is that people who too readily accuse others of being "too sensitive" are very often bullies. Their pronouncements are their cowardly attempt to deflect responsibility for their cruelty.
I found many of the things you said I've been doing them all along, many not even aware it was because of this. I would also add to your video that "recharging" doesn't mean watching Netflix, which I agree with 100%, because recharging for us means doing something that allows us to stop receiving inputs from outside. For example painting, writing, meditating, having a bath with slow music or none, anything creative from DIY to building furniture, etc. where the inputs come from within and so our self can either rest or express itself without pressure.
I am definitely Highly Sensitive. I have the complications of Fibromyalgia, Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, Psoriasis and Menopause too! In the past few months I have started to really prioritise rest, sleep, alone time and setting boundaries.
Such wonderful tips, I especially love the second about acceptance. It reminds me of a time I was recovering from heartbreak, and telling a friend that "I am so sensitive and take a while to process... I need to get better/faster at processing." My friend told me that no, I processed perfectly and uniquely how I should. That conversation stuck with me, and has helped me better appreciate and care for my sensitive lil self haha. *Much love to all my fellow sensitive souls* 💜😊
Vera, this was such a good video. I identified with all your points. It’s good to know what we can tolerate and what upsets us. Crowds, scary films, animal cruelty, not enough alone time all drain me. Thanks for another great video!
I will say as a life long sensitive person, when I was horribly burnt out at my hospital job as a nurse, I could not tolerate intense exercise, it would trigger migraines and nausea and ruin a whole day, I tried to “push through” and I came to realize it never worked, no amount of will power could overcome the intense physically ill feeling it would induce. Now that I have been a year out from switching to a lower stress job I have incorporated more intensity and weight training which can help with stamina and guard us from fatigue. My personal experience is that it depends a lot on my current life circumstances how I will tolerate exercise.
What do you do now? Are you still in the nursing field? I am an aspiring nurse but often worry that I will quickly be overwhelmed as I am also very sensitive.
@@nmariekuu Do a few public speaking courses. Join group activities even if you feel uneasy. Dont compare yourself with others. Practice assertiveness. Never say"YES" when you want to say "NO'. Develop your mental muscles. Reduce negative thoughts with a simple practice. Your breath and mind [brain] are closely related causing stress-anxiety. For a better life sit on a chair, neck straight, eyes closed and observe the sensations of your incoming--outgoing breath at the entrance of the nostrils for 5-10-15 minutes or more. Don’t fight your thoughts. Slowly the mind will relax. No deep breathing needed. Do the practice without any expectations. Change happens from within by itself. Day or night, when taking a walk, sitting in a park, when reading, before sleep etc sit or lie down and observe your breath. Like me, make this a lifetime daily habit to have a good life. Avoid constipation as it affects the mind instantly. Best wishes Shyaaam Sir. -Counsellor.
Okay so the first tip shook me to my core, I already do that and yes my friends and family make fun of me too like 'oh do you have ___ in your backpack too?' but yes I do feel more comfortable and safe knowing that I have everything I -could- need.
When I figured out that I am a sensitive person it helped me to get over the anxiety and I lived with for long time. What you shared is spot on for sensitive people and helps other to have an awareness. Journaling and drawing doodles in my journals helps me to let go of the things that bother me. Thanks for sharing
Thankfully for me I'm only fifteen and discovered this year that I'm a HSP.. I used to have awful anxiety but I am so much better now! There's still much to work through but now I actually understand myself! EDIT: I literally feel so DRAINED after school each day that all I want to do is sleep and it takes a couple hours to feel myself again
I dedicate an hour a day just to wrap myself up in a blanket in the dark and listen to comforting songs (or just use sound blocking headphones ). It helps me cope
I never thought about why I prefer to arrive early for things until you articulated it in this video. Makes so much sense, and I feel the same way in terms of centering myself and getting used to my surroundings.
My husband would often tell me to get out of my comfort zone. Usually it meant doing things that overwhelmed me. I asked one day why it was always me that had to do this, and not him. Now I know where to set boundaries
This is a great presentation. I have learnt all these things about myself over the years. However this information wasn't available when I was younger. I really wish it had been, and I'm glad it is now for people learning about them selves. I'm also sensitive to noise and I realised this is true for acoustics in public places. Cafés with hard flat surfaces, especially the floor (no carpet), are acoustically 'live' with lots of echo. This means the voice of the person you are talking to is overpowered by reflected noise from all directions. This makes people speak louder to be heard and that makes the problem worse. So finding spaces with soft furnishings and carpets really makes me feel more relaxed while conversing.
It feels like you're reading my mind... It's like wow I'm actually not the only person that takes water, a chapstick and noise cancelling headphones whenever going out. Thank you so much!
I have always known myself to be sensitive but it only just dawned on me yesterday that I am actually a Highly Sensitive Person. I find it so comforting that this is an actual category that has been well studied. I have also been told that I’m too sensitive and for a long time I wished I wasn’t that way. In recent times I’ve come to accept my sensitivity and to make things work for me, and I do see being sensitive as a strength despite the challenges it brings. Thank you Vera for talking about this topic, I’ve been following this channel for over a year and even though I’ve heard you talk about being an HSP, I only just realised that I am one as well when I watched another video where you mentioned that you are sensitive to the wind (I am too! I bring a hat a scarf wherever I go in case it’s cold and/or windy). Much love to you ❤
Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts Amy! So happy you found out about your high sensitivity, because it can help us to really accept this side of ourselves and do what we need to feel happy and healthy :) Take good care! Wishing you a wonderful 2023
Accepting your sensitivity, working with it - absolutely. Identifying with it - not a good idea. Don't think of your self as a sensitive person, rather a person with sensitive nature. The difference is small but substantial.
Thank you so much for bringing more attention to highly sensitive people. I just discovered that book a year ago and found it life changing. I'm much more able to accept myself now. About time, huh? I'm 65! lol
I'm HSP too. I have always view myself as a weak person until last year. I discovered the HSP community and since then, i feel much better. I became pretty minimalist, and have changed my life a bit. I suffer from chronic pain and it's even more challenging for me to confront doctors and try to get a diagnosis. Thank you for the video. It helps !
You're very welcome Deborah, and if you ever want to read more about it, I recommend The highly sensitive person by Elaine Aron. It's a very comforting and reassuring read, and of course informative :)
Thank you for sharing this! As a highly sensitive person who is experiencing burnout, this is incredibly helpful. I've always known I was sensitive, but this gave me some grace to move forward with the plan I have made for myself to get back to health and recreate who I want to be with my health as top priority.
Hi my friend, so happy you enjoyed the video! Take care and I hope you'll feel better and recover from your burnout with time. Sending healing vibes your way
@@AnaPaula-dd3in I started focusing on me first. I've been a serial people pleaser and have put my needs last so I started working on putting my needs first. I also looked into my diet and lifestyle habits and took note of the self destructive habits (started reading Atomic Habits by James Clear) and began taking small steps to eliminate the bad habits and replace them with good habits. I experimented with my diet and figured out I am gluten intolerant so I went gf and set a goal of 30 days. It was a bit of stop and go but I'm finally at 35 days which my next goal is to hit 60 days and assess how I feel (so far I feel much better, very little anxiety, lost 8 lbs, less inflammation) I started meditating 10 mins every morning, began exercising 20 mins a day, and began creating and stating my boundaries with those around me. None of this happened overnight and each person is different but I'd say start small and allow for mistakes (give yourself compassion and love while you're beginning your path to health) and give yourself praise everday for being brave enough to begin the journey. You may be amazed by the changes you see when you start with one small habit change and how it snowballs into more changes. I also started sticking to a routine (up at 6:15am, dinner at 6pm, bed by 9pm) this helped reset my circadian rhythm. I'm a planner/organizer so having a set schedule really helped my peace of mind. I also started preemptive striking for when stressful or busy times begin (I'm a college student) so I made a master grocery list, restocked my cupboards with gf friendly components to make meal prep a breeze. Now I can just run through my master meal list (20 simple dinners, lunch staples, breakfast staples, and healthy snack options) and have rotating meals ready in no time and without over thinking. All these positive changes came from me asking myself this one simple question for about a year. I asked myself how much better will my life be if I just take care of myself. Best of luck - you've got this!
Hi I was amazed at how many of your suggestions I already do, but unconsciously. Thank you because you make me feel so much more reasonable and rational.
you descried me in a way I thought I was talking to myself! I was always not good in explaining myself or the way I feel and this always put me in stress and problems, I always say this is how I exist in the world and completely accepted that no one is care enough to understand how I feel pain and respect it without taking it as a joke or something funny, I feel that in the modern fast rush world no is willing to listen to us sadly. thanks for sharing this with us and bring to my attention the importance to understand ourselves and be aware of our needs!
Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts, happy to hear you enjoyed the video! Feel free to check out my HSP playlist. The videos are a bit older, but they're all about being highly sensitive and they could perhaps be helpful for you as well :) th-cam.com/play/PLpDAC25h6PC8v5bhadp2pKQrK_0e4sd55.html
Thank you dear 💜 I'm recovering from a burnout since 3 months and I'm found my self in your words ! I made some researches about how to lead with hyper sensitivy and this video is the best, your tips are simples and powerfull 🌟 It will help me A LOT! Blesses for you and your journey ✨
Excellent video. As a Taurean, I am quite sensitive and as I've grown older, I've really embraced it. I do most of these things in the video. I also have a little pack of essentials with me everywhere. I love having headphones with me because I can listen to music anywhere. I also don't like high energy exercise, I prefer walking. I am very good at scheduling rest time but its something I had to learn to do.
It is also important to address that this is also a coping mechanism - because we were usually born into a family, where the basic stable feeling of safety wasn't provided most of the time and we learned to tune into the feelings of our surroundings so that we can have a little more control, be safer, predict the reacting of others by sensing them. So I personally think it is also very important to heal the root cause of us empaths
Bruh what's this. I think you might be describing exactly what I think I am starting to realize. Always super analyzing people which makes me exhausted and not pay attention to what is actually said. Probably because I want to predict like you say. My mom pretended to abandon me as a kid and had abandonment issues since then when I was a kid. Maybe I analyze people so much now to see if they will abandon me or something lol I don't know. But doesn't make sense for strangers and people I don't rely on. I caught myself analyzing old childhood friends and stopped because it felt disrespectful and I didn't want to predict their behavior etc because I love them and they were always nice to me as a kid. Like second parents. Maybe i don't analyse due to trauma maybe it's just something I was born with but I am trying to get rid of it and just relax and enjoy social situations and go with the flow instead.
Wow there are a lot of good tips in here that I didn't fully consider. I love the one about not doing today what you can't recover from tomorrow! So true!
HSP here. This month marks 1 year since I stopped using social media (With the exception of TH-cam and Whatsapp). Best decision I ever made. I never realized how much exposure to all of the bad things happening in the world made me feel so anxious and heavy-burdened. Also in social media everybody's life seem to be so much better than your own (which is obviously a lie, but try telling that to my subconscious).
Ooooh , Vera thank you ! I’ve definitely always been a highly sensitive person and it has come with its inherent struggles and gifts! And yes ... if I’ve pushed on anyway, trying to “fit in” more with the norm, it has led to burn out and even serious health problems ! ( IE: I’m a cancer survivor and while no one knows exactly what causes that, it’s easy to see that chronic exhaustion, over extending, stress and not enough self care can be a major culprit). I love and need my alone time, even if that means I can’t keep up with my friends nearly as much as the “ideal”. There are so many gifts that come with being highly sensitive though! And I feel blessed despite the challenges and yepp ... sometimes feeling alone in this, or “weird” or whatever. Thank you for these reminders about self care and boundaries, & this important validation! I am 61 and am still getting reminders from the Universe that I need to further hone my (currently still very limited) skills in gently but clearly & effectively asserting boundaries, and practice more self care. Haha YES to the extreme aversion to harsh vibes / images in the media ! NOT a fan of violent movies and the like ! I don’t have a TV now by choice. But when I did, I remember blocking out ads that were harsh, while otherwise watching something like a nice Holiday program ! For me, playing and deeply listening to music has often been a positive and therapeutic part of being sensitive. But I LOVE & need quiet, too! Nature is soooo healing! And I love the beautiful, peaceful nature images that you include in your videos. I’m reminded I need to walk barefoot on the Earth more, too ! I’ll try and do that before the colder weather sets in ! Your sweet, sensitive nature is a gift tp us all! And congrats on your lovely apartment makeover! I love the splashes of green colors, your blanket ladder, mirror, rug ... everything ! So joyful and calming! And so cool that you found an actual all wooden coffee table ! That’s hard to find these days ! Have a lovely, restorative weekend, Vera ! You are dearly loved and appreciated. Liz
Hi Liz,thank you so much for leaving this wonderful comment!! I can relate to much of what you said and I'm happy you enjoyed the video :) Also, I'm sorry to hear about your health issues you've had to face, and I hope you're feeling good and healthy now! The nature images were fun for me to edit too, haha. A calming experience. Also, thanks for your compliments about the apartment make-over! I'm realy happy with everything :) Take care, have a lovely day and talk again soon!!
The thing about exercising really resonates with me. I never understood why I felt such resentment towards going running, but now I realize it’s because it’s quite hard on my body and makes me feel really uncomfortable in the moment, even if I feel good afterwards.
Thank you so much for this video! I realized that I'm a highly sensitive person just a few months ago and it makes perfect sense. I can get overwhelmed quite easily, I need a lot of sleep... I also always carry a bag with a few things with me - like water, tissues, and chewing gums :D. I tried to do exercise in a gym, but I really hated it and I always felt exhausted. I started to do yoga every day instead and it feels great! It's really difficult to start listening to your body and give yourself enough time and space, but it's also liberating.
I'm a 29 year old male. I didn't realize I was sensitive until I was 16. It took me over a decade to find all these things out for myself. The biggest part of it was realizing that I wasn't like everyone else and didn't have to be like everyone else. When I finally accepted my sensitivity and allowed myself to look after myself (even if it was different from all my friends), I finally arrived home. If only I had seen this video years ago. Very accurate stuff!
Always can relate. I have Fibromyalgia and super sensitive. Honestly just learned the importance of tip #1 when I turned 36. Hah. Cheers! No more perfectionism and "illusion of control".
I am a highly sensitive person who tries to pretend not to be. Once upon a time i was a physically strong person who ran a wolf refuge on the side of a mt. I have always been an emphatic person. Now I suffer from Dysautonomia... which is a dysfunctional automatic nervous system. This has slowed me down grealty. Everything you said resonates so deeply for me now on all levels.
I'm definitely one of the people with heightened sensitivity. I really love and appreciate that you are bringing this up. I think for the longest time people felt that this is something to be ignored. Thank you for sharing these techniques, I can most definitely relate!
Nice to know I'm not the only one. I find using my hands to do crafts - in my case knitting or hand sewing of some kind, drawing or painting or even bread baking helps restore me.
Your advice is 🔥 Im not even sure if im an especially sensitive person but i follow this in my life and it works :) preserving energy is key if you want to live an intentional/productive life, what ever that may mean to you. Keeping boundaries, self-care, leaving some, etc..
My boyfriend is always telling me I need to be more tough and that the world is not as shiny and beautiful as I think… I have to say I believed him and I started watching loud movies with war scenes in it. I’ve been getting more tough but I’m also feeling more and more depressive because of all the stimulie around me I have to handle.
Maybe reconsider this relationship. Watching "loud movies with war scenes" will never make you a better person, but it will only upset and desensitize you. Why would a good boyfriend want to do that to you?
As someone that has been told that I can be "exhausting" and/or am not "pleasant to be around most of the time" since I guess that me having depression, anxiety, PTSD, & phobias = me being a burden, I appreciate vids like this
Thank you for this video! It was very inspiring :) I definetly need to find new ways to recharge after I became a parent and with a job as a teacher it's so easy to feel overvelmed after work and not being able to fully relax before my son's bedtime.
Hi Marie, glad you found the video inspiring :) I can imagine becoming a parent and having a busy job can be a lot. Take care and remember to take a little break here and there where you can!
Yep, this is me. Can’t stand people, social situations, noise, having to rush, too many tasks to do, even clutter or extra stuff lying around. I am a nurse and had to switch to working nights with one patient in home care to get away from all the chaos. I was constantly anxious and having difficulty remembering things. We are all different. Some thrive on fast paced activities and constant busyness and some of us just can’t handle all that.
Actually I didn't know that I'm a one 🤔 but when I watched the video, found out that you were talking about me . Hate the noise, need some time to be alone every day 😒 or I will be exhausted and nervous 😓 really big thanks for this video vera ,it means a lot for me 💙
Thank you so much! If you want to, you could watch my video about 30 signs you're a highly sensitive person. To see how many you recognize in yourself. You can find the video here: th-cam.com/video/j1OxtehkayE/w-d-xo.html
For years I have done the planning ahead strategy and people shamed me for it, since, essentially, ''the need for it is a flaw I need to fix.'' Similarly, I'm incredibly sensitive to violence/pain/sadness so I avoid media with it, and people tell me it's not healthy to avoid, and that I need to work on getting over it. But you reiterating that all of this is okay is really helpful. Thank you for this video
You're very welcome Emily, I'm sorry people have told you these things. If you haven't already and you're able to get it somewhere (or borrow it), I recommend reading The Highly Sensitive Person by Elaine Aron, if you want to understand high sensitivity better and feel more empowered :) I thought it was absolutely wonderful.
I just discovered your channel and this video came up. VERY helpful......I am a very sensitive gentleman, age 61. It has taken me most of my life to realize that it IS OKAY to be sensitive and it IS OKAY to be different. I have few friends as most people do NOT understand me. The few that do, realize these qualities in me are awesome and that I am a VERY deep person. Thank you for a most helpful and supportive video. I am your newest subscriber.
I felt the same way as well..but I turned out to have high functioning autism. I just thought that I was very sensitive, introverted, and easily overwhelmed. It might be something that you might want to check into a little. You never know.
Hello. ☺️ I am also diagnosed with high functioning autism (also called Autism Spectrum Disorder or Aspergers) and I have watched all of the HSP videos on this lovely channel. There seems to be considerable overlap with these diagnoses, and Vera's tips and guidance have been very helpful to me. Thanks!
Thanks for your video! I'd like to share my experience. I've always been sensitive and have always felt different and sometimes even inferior to others, because our sensitive needs are usually ignored or are made fun of. I know that a lot of experiences are very harmful and therefore banned for me forever (clubbing, concerts, karaoke, parties, big family gatherings, having children, working full-time in a regular office), but it's okay. I find joy in things that other people find insignificant or boring. I don't need extra stimulation to feel alive. And actually recently I've realised I was autistic. It made so much sense. And I felt like the puzzle was finally solved. Autism is not always portrayed correctly in media, that's why it had never crossed my mind before. I'd like more sensitive people to find answers and find peace.
Hello! I'm the gal who tackled her 30 years-basement of life by removing 1 grocery bag of stuff a week. I'm way more sensitive than most people, on the inside too. I get motion sick, car and boat sick, I can't look down and then up sometimes without serious dizziness; I can get hives; I have senstivity to light, and also get migraines; smells can get to me, solutions and hand santizers and surface wipes makes me feel like the Marianne Moore character in the movie SAFE (like I have Environmental Illness). Yah, so all this and loving the tips. Release our fear and pack that tote bag!
I clicked this video because it was in my recommended more viewing it as a procrastination activity, than thinking I would get much out of it....but wow....so freaky how you pointed out all these character traits that I identify with; I didn't realise they weren't just personal failings...If what you say is true, they are legitimate character traits that make up the personality. This feels so empowering and validating to know. The shame and guilt of feeling "lazy" and "weak" will take a while to work through I'm sure. Now I wonder if there's a way to harness the empathic mindset in a constructive way, I'm sure that would make the process easier...
Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts after watching my video :) I'm so happy you got something out of it! I want to spread the word about being a highly sensitive person (which indeed is an inherent biological trait) and the positive sides to it, so there's more coming soon :) Take care my friend!
Highly sensitive. But we make good mom's. I avoid too many people. I've been heart hurt by random strangers many times. I try to help my kids be emotionally stronger than I am.
I wish I'd encountered these ideas when I was younger. Would have saved me a lot of stress and hardship. I always tried to take on every challenge that presented itself, in the belief that I could just power through whatever happened. The results were not good. Never too late to make changes though!
I'm sooo sensitive that I have to be careful about which TH-camrs I watch, because I can't tolerate people who talk too loud, too fast and too much 😆 Also videos full of colours, lights and 50 different angles stress me out. That's why your channel is my safe place because I feel really comfortable and even I recharge my energy 🤗
Thank you Vera! I still remember, how much it hurt, when my own mother scolded me for always having needed sooo much sleep. On the other hand she admired my creativity in music, writing and painting. Well, these gifts cime with a "price", don't they? I have come to regard myself as a coenobiont. "The opposite of ubiquists are coenobionts." I "can't" happily, healthily "live" or rather thrive everywhere (in the world today), so the 8 tips you named in this video are measures I need to take to my rare "species" to be able to survive nonetheless.
Wow! This really spoke to me. It all makes sense now. Been sensitive person since I've been little and now into my sixties. Every bit of that rang true for me. Now I know what I can do to help with my energy.
Thanks Vera. Prior to finding you recently, I discovered Alex Howard of Optimum Health and learned about 'Decoding Fatigue/Trauma' and a Sleep Conference. I am now doing his Reset Programme for people who have experienced Trauma and ended up the Chronic Conditions. I look forward to viewing more of your very helpful videos. Thank you x Mary
I found out I was an empath by accident on social media. Scrolling through Facebook. I was in my early 60's. I am 65 now. It was definitely an eye opener. The answer to a lot of questions. We are very special people and it can take a toll on me everyday. Thanks for the tips. I really appreciate it. This was a great video. Welcome to the family of sensitives.
You're definitely not alone! If you ever want more tips, feel free to check out my HSP playlist. :) There's a bunch of videos on the topic. They're a bit older, but I think still very valuable :) th-cam.com/play/PLpDAC25h6PC8v5bhadp2pKQrK_0e4sd55.html
@@SimpleHappyZen Hello Dear, I have checked out the playlist.. and found it’s quite helpful☺️ thanks so much for sharing such valuable videos. These are real life saving 🙏♥️
I absolutely LOVE the Fall colors (my favorite season). Your videos are well thought out. Some people do not know how much work and time it takes to create content. I understand, because my son is a TH-camr. Thank you so much for these beautiful images and insightful information. 😊
I didnt realize that getting enough sleep is an essential to a (highly) sensitive person like me. Altho I do my best to get enough rest/sleep, it was only now that I learned the "science" behind it. Thank you for sharing this content! Very helpful as always!
As a sensitive person Iv also found myself as a people pleaser, so much to the point I will inconvenience myself to help someone through a hard time regardless of it making myself happy. I just feel a duty to help. My mom has been helpful with this as she is the same. She's told me how I need to pull back a bit and make sure I'm taking care of myself before I help others, so I don't drain myself in the process. You can compare it to putting your own oxygen mask on when the plain is going down, before you help your neighbor with theirs. I also struggle with crowds.because of this shopping gives me anxiety 😝 and I love alone time, I'm a big one body ❤️
Thanks for sharing your experiences Cecily! I think it's great you want to help others, and that you found out that you sometimes cross your own boundaries when doing so. Recognizing is the first step :) It's really nice that your mom is helping you out with this as well. :) Take care!
Thank you for the loving care and kindness in this video. It's very easy to forget how unproductive pretending to be non-sensitive can be in a world where grind/hustle culture is worshipped. This video was filled with sweet and affirming reminders that my life/time/effort isn't worthless just because I need more rest and accommodations in between bursts of activity/productivity.
Thanks for watching! 🤗 Would you say that, on average, you’re more sensitive than most others, less sensitive, or the same? 👇👇 Let me know 😊
More than most, less than many HSP’s but I had to work at changing that, creating a semi-permeable bubble.😕
I’m not sensitive but I don’t like having to defend my opinion when others insist I must agree with them.
Much more. I use many of techniques you talked about in this video, too. I have also learned to block out other’s energies. I’m such an oasis, and all these other energies, thoughts and moods started really exhaust me, especially negative ones. So I had to learn to shut them out. It wasn’t and isn’t easy. Still struggling sometimes!
@@anueerola9242 I need to work on doing that as well. Do you have any tips?
More sensitive! My 6 siblings are all very aggressive, abusive and cold. If I do meet someone who is sensitive, I tend to befriend that person. Thankfully, I like crowds! =)
I am EXTREMELY highly sensitive. If someone snaps at me, says something the wrong way, looks at me wrong, I WILL tear up and shut down, and it can ruin my whole day. I avoid confrontation at all costs and even feel anxious if I feel I overshared something I wanted to keep to myself. It’s tough.
Me too! If someone snaps I feel the exact same way!
That's exactly me
can you tell me the solution. I feel like I really need some solution. plz someone help me
but don't tell me to open up to family, they made me uncomfortable to share just anything and friends there's no one ready to listen and also if there's anyone I'm just not able to share a single word, idk how to do this
@@najmussaherOT7 you can try talking to chat gpt first, to train your ability to share smth. Once you're confident, you can use anonymous chats with real ppl, and then maybe friends (if you want to)
Omg… Literally me.
I am highly sensitive and I have lots of empathy. People can be draining. I am not comfortable around loud noises and prefer to be in nature . Thank you Vera! ☮️
Thank you for sharing Jennie, I can relate 🤗🌿🍃
Ditto! I'm an INFP so I think y'all would relate to me and vice versa :)
@@stevethomas74 Do a few public speaking courses. Join group activities even if you feel uneasy. Dont compare yourself with others. Practice assertiveness. Never say"YES" when you want to say "NO'. Develop your mental muscles. Reduce negative thoughts with a simple practice. Your breath and mind [brain] are closely related causing stress-anxiety. For a better life sit on a chair, neck straight, eyes closed and observe the sensations of your incoming--outgoing breath at the entrance of the nostrils for 5-10-15 minutes or more. Don’t fight your thoughts. Slowly the mind will relax. No deep breathing needed. Do the practice without any expectations. Change happens from within by itself. Day or night, when taking a walk, sitting in a park, when reading, before sleep etc sit or lie down and observe your breath. Like me, make this a lifetime daily habit to have a good life. Avoid constipation as it affects the mind instantly. Best wishes Shyaaam Sir. -Counsellor.
Jennie, Do a few public speaking courses. Join group activities even if you feel uneasy. Dont compare yourself with others. Practice assertiveness. Never say"YES" when you want to say "NO'. Develop your mental muscles. Reduce negative thoughts with a simple practice. Your breath and mind [brain] are closely related causing stress-anxiety. For a better life sit on a chair, neck straight, eyes closed and observe the sensations of your incoming--outgoing breath at the entrance of the nostrils for 5-10-15 minutes or more. Don’t fight your thoughts. Slowly the mind will relax. No deep breathing needed. Do the practice without any expectations. Change happens from within by itself. Day or night, when taking a walk, sitting in a park, when reading, before sleep etc sit or lie down and observe your breath. Like me, make this a lifetime daily habit to have a good life. Avoid constipation as it affects the mind instantly. Best wishes Shyaaam Sir. -Counsellor.
@@shyaaammeneen63 I try to do a few of those things (especially the group activities as I love walking so I'm in a few Meetup walking groups). Thanks for your input :)
Never change because people call you sensitive as an insult. Never be ashamed of caring.
I agree! :)
Boom, yup!
I don’t know. My best girlfriend had real sympathy for me when she said aw, you’re just too sensitive. She wasn’t like me, , she was caring, but she felt bad for me.
Ik this comment is two years old. but i need to thank you for this
We musicians are profoundly grateful for sensitive people. Without your ears and hearts, what we do would be far less meaningful. Thank you!
I am a musician 😊 And I am a sensitive person 😂 Most of the time, musicians are the most sensitive people in the world, I know a lot of such people!
Such a nice insight!!! And true 🙏🏾
Music is my safe place... I have been able to do live music pretty well, I feel the connection to the crowd energetically. It is getting a little more difficult , I am picking and choosing more carefully.
Sensitivity is good for many things: Creativity, music, art, intelligence, analytical skills, empathy, caring, listening skills, lie detection, atmosphere creation, calming things down, choosing your words carefully, bonding, friendship... the list goes on.
YES!! 💖
I was venting about being sensitive with a friend, and they said something very wise, "Because you're sensitive you'll be able to bridge gaps that have never been crossed and see things that are invisible to others."
@@shipwrecker37 I agree however sometimes those bridge gaps can be challenging for those of us highly sensitive
@@soph8164 It's like you're referencing the same research I was thinking about. I think the finding was that sensitive people are better at bridging the gaps, but they're susceptible to burn out when doing so. They may even report that they're bad at it despite being much better than the average.
@@shipwrecker37 🌸🌸
I am 68 years old, and this is the first time I have heard positive things about being highly sensitive. All my life it has been, "You're too sensitive. Buck up" etc. Thank you for the tips. I feel certain they are going to help me. Big smile.
Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts! I'm so happy you enjoyed the video and found the tips helpful 🤗🌷 Actually, I have an entire playlist about being highly sensitive, with lots of positivity 😊 The videos are quite old but I still like them myself and I think they could be helpful as well. So if you're interested, feel free to check it out: th-cam.com/play/PLpDAC25h6PC8v5bhadp2pKQrK_0e4sd55.html
happy birthday
Thanks for bringing this out in the open for others who have no idea that this is just one way that people are different. Some humans just cannot fathom what it is like to be different.
I get told to thicken up. Or" you too sensitive. "
@@SimpleHappyZen Re. @intigniadickey2224: Thank you so much; this is so much me! I'm even older (75), and most of my life has been making excuses for my 'me' time, and excuses for being overwhelmed, and needing my sleep regularity, etc. ...Very helpful!
I am indeed sensitive, empath, an introvert and also an INFJ. How did I manage to stay alive (I do have anxiety issues) is nothing less than a wonder in my eyes.
I’m also what you’ve described.currently not okay but i hope we find a cure some day
I'm a tough person, thus it's hard for me to understand my sensitive friends. Their reactions are often unintuitive for me. I came here to learn and understand the topic better. ^^'
Just the fact that you are taking the time to understand your sensitive friends better tells me you are a better friend than any of the people I have surrounded myself with in the past 7 years. Thank you for being a good person, I hope I meet someone like you one day.
Glad you did that for your friends. Wish my family would.
I’m happy to see more being said these days about highly sensitive people because I am one. All my life I’ve been led to believe it’s a character flaw and that there is something wrong with me. When people told me I was too sensitive, I was hurt and angry at the same time. I wondered what was wrong with me because I couldn’t be as outgoing and relaxed as others around me. I wish it had been better understood and accepted years ago so I wouldn’t have felt so awkward and out of step. I was surprised when you mentioned exercise and how it affected you because that’s the way it affects me but no one seems to understand, they say it’s laziness. Thank you for sharing these techniques for coping. ❤️
Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts Carolyn, it's things like what you mentioned that make me think it's so important to talk about this more. :) Take care and have a lovely day!
To me your comment makes a whole lot of sense. I am not highly sensitive at all, but it's only obvious that excersizing can drain you mentally; there is a lot of movement going on in the gym plus there is music, and people talking. One might drop a dumbell or whatever which only adds to the overall sound overdose.
I do workout regularily, and all these things I've described above don't bother me at all, but it's only logical that it does this to you, and that is no laziness at all. It can only be said as laziness by people who want to tease you, who only see the negative, or who simply don't understand you, which often happens if these people are way different than you are. If you ask me, there's nothing wrong with being sensitive or highly sensitive.
But because it is an extreme trait (hence the word 'highly') it is only obvious that these things affects you equally extreme. No wonder you're hurt by what these people say to you. On the other hand I can only imagine the benefits of being highly sensitive: I bet you can love much deeper and feel those positive emotions way more than people who are not as sensitive as you are. And that is something I hope you treasure in yourself. :)
And even people who are not highly sensitive - such as myself - can still understand you by at least taking you serious.
I hope this message helps you somehow.
🤍
@@Leto85 Thank you so much for your comment. It does help.
@@Leto85 What a kind, empathetic comment! Even though your comment wasn't directed toward me, I appreciate your kindness. There are such lovely people in the world such as yourself!💚
Wow, growing up as a sensitive man in slavic country was very confusing, I would always think that there is something unacceptable about me when around people. Something that I need to change for good. Then I realized, that I just need to take different approach to life than most people.
I know, man. Living in slavic country is brutal, unless you are macho,macho man, or a conventionally beautifull woman
I’m 58 years old and I hear “you are too sensitive” I recently respond “God made me this way.” Loud noises gets under my skin and I can’t even think. I love being in nature. The news, sad, violent movies effects me for days and sometimes weeks. Subbed. Thank you for sharing.
Same! ❤
Everything you said I can relate to. I have seen something on the news and went to bed and woke up the next day with tears in my eyes. I’ve read other stories and went to my son crying about a story I just read about an animal. I love nature as well. It’s so calming. I have recently been thinking something is wrong with me. Sometimes I cry so easy and I hate that. But Vera is such a help to explain all this. It really helps. Good luck to you. Thanks for sharing your story.
I still remember how upset I was when I saw my first violent movie many years ago….Pork Chop Hill…at age 12. I always wondered why it upset me so much. Through the years I have learned to avoid all such things. Can’t do it!
I’m 62. When I was 22 I would say that I was very sensitive. Now it’s more like “Just bug off. I really don’t care if you don’t like me.”
I've learned to hide how I feel. Growing up, I was always treated as a drama queen for being so sensitive. Nowadays, however bad I feel, I look calm and composed on the outside. I don't even care to show how I feel anymore. Why talk in a world where no-one listens? I can't wait to have kids of my own. I will shower them with all the love and kindness that I can give. At least someone will benefit from my sensitivity.
Good for you…..When my sons were born I finally had someone to love who would take me as I am and not make me feel put down all the time. I did everything I could to raise them the opposite of what I went through as a child. Both of my sons have done very well in their adult lives. What a blessing they have been to me.
I’m an empath with an anxiety disorder. I’ve been trying to learn how to keep myself grounded for years. My son is 6 and he’s exhibiting the same “overly" sensitive and anxious traits I did growing up. I’m hard on him sometimes because i don’t want him to be an anxious mess like me, but this video really helps change my perspective - that being sensitive isn’t a personal flaw. I think I need to sit down with him and talk about real coping mechanisms instead of getting upset when he’s being my mirror.
Thank you for sharing your experiences! I think what you said about talking and discussing coping mechanisms sounds great. Also, Elaine Aron also has a book called The highly sensitive child. I haven't read it myself, but it might be helpful for you. Take care!
I suggest that you fix your relationship with him first then you start teaching him about what can help him , you can't be punishing someone for something you do it yourself especially that he's a child of yours because children tend to to learn more from their parents and the environment they grow up in . Being anxious is already a load itself being hard on him WILL just ADD to his anxiety which is something you must know it yourself . also being hard on someone no matter what problem they might have is not a solution unless they decide it for their selves and that's a fact you cant deny
if you're wondering why I'm speaking , I'm already suffering from anxiety and and a high sensitivity person with a condition called hyperhidrosis , my mother is a nervous person who can get mad on anything .i think that's enough for me to talk about this . and I really hope you fix what's between the two of you.
Dear Passa Cookie…you are not alone! I am also a highly sensitive anxious mom raising a little boy who is my carbon copy! I am hard on him too sometimes. I know exactly how feel about not wanting him to be an anxious mess. I have taught him about being highly sensitive and how it’s not a flaw. I also try to balance out times when I may be too hard or critical with being extra kind and snuggly with him. He is a big time snuggler and getting lots of hugs or laying down next to him at bedtime seems to cancel out the times I’ve been too tough. And apologizing when you’ve hurt his feelings is a good thing too!
I mean I'm sorry but how the fuck can you be an empath and be hard on your son for showing signs of anxiety? I mean wouldn't a supposed empath understand that treating a child with anxiety harshly because of their anxious traits isn't a very empathetic or helpful way to go about it? How did it ever help you for example?
@@NinjaOutfitInTheWash Your comment is why I don't usually comment on videos. I'm an overwhelmed parent with two kids on the spectrum doing my best and recognizing that I can do better / actively working on doing better. Instead of acknowledging that or sounding concerned or offering advice, you jump down my throat for a situation you don't know anything about except for my overly simplified description. By "being hard on him" I mean constant nagging (not screaming or hurting my child). When he's exhibiting anxious tendencies, they don't always come across as "being anxious," so it's hard to identify. Lift people up instead of putting them down.
I have struggled with low self esteem most of my life, and I believe much of it stemmed from feeling out of place and different. I’ve been told to toughen up since I was a kid. Only recently have I begun to understand who I am and more importantly be ok with it. Thank you so much for videos like this! They are little confidence boosters.
🤗💕🌷
It's just like born for the second time when you finally understand why you think so differently and deeply from most people!😊
Boundaries are often underestimated, but I've come to realise that they're a real boon to up your confidence and self respect in situations that make you uncomfortable.
Yes! :)
I agree that arriving early and traveling the less hectic route are so helpful. I have always known this works better for me. I hate being rushed. I love meeting with one or two people but not a large, noisy group. I've always felt I build strong friendships because I am fully present with the people close to me. Your video is validating that there are pluses to having these characteristics. Thank you!
Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts Barbara! I'm happy to hear you enjoyed the video :) Take care!
Thank you for encouraging us to be ourselves and to not feel guilty for who we are
You're so welcome and there's absolutely no need for guilt or shame! 🤗🍵🌾 We have very unique gifts to bring to the world. Enjoy your day!!
Good advice. I’m an introvert. Being in loud social situations with lots of talking wears me out.I have to decompress afterwards. Thanks for the helpful tips!
Thanks for sharing your thoughts and I can relate to needing to decompress afterwards :)
Yes, decompress! That's the word I'm trying to say but couldn't find it. Thank you for sharing. 😂
If I attend a party or an intense discussion or meeting, it would take even days to decompress 😢
I'm a hsp as well, and what drives me crazy is loud noises, fast and intense talkers, fast paced lifestyle that is surrounding me in a City, modern mainstream garbage music, traffic, strong smells, bad news, violent movies, when people rush me, and the list goes on... What helps me though, is trying to live a simple and minimal life, sleeping at least 8 hours a night, going on walks regularly in nature to recharge, where "few" people go. Trying to eat more healthy, even though that can be super challenging since the bad stuff is comforting and tastes yummy, lol... I try to be organized, prepared and tidy, but i'm still working on that and have a long way to go... I take earplugs with me everywhere I go, so if it gets too noisy I put them in, especially when I'm shopping. Even though I try to go shopping during less busy times, like evenings when most people start getting ready for bed, lol... I even put ear plugs in sometimes when my loud and intense speaking neighbours babble or when my family get together... They make joking remarks and give me the look, like I'm not ok upstairs, lol... I find oldies, classic, soft jazz & spa music soothing... Being around positive, soft spoken and down-to- earth people is a plus for me when I am around people... But the majority of people don't understand me, and I find it difficult to make deep friendships, because I just don't click with most people, and Vice Versa. I can tell that according to them there's something wrong with me, but at least now I'm learning to accept myself as I am. And a few deep friendships that I can count on one hand is more than enough for me anyway...We hsp do have many positives too, so it's not all bad! 😊🌿
Absolutely love what you shared, thanks for sharing your experiences!! :) Have a lovely day
@@SimpleHappyZen Thank you so much Vera!😊💚
Hello, can I ask for my research, are you vegan?
The survival kit really resonated with me! ❤️ It's been a journey for me to accept that I need to have a snack at hand whenever I go out. I simply cannot function if my blood sugar is low, and it can drop quite suddenly.
The same goes for accepting that I'm a slow eater. I need to chew my food well. I still have some shame around it, but it has gotten better. It's just that the world is not built for people like me, and there are days when every little inconvenience reminds me of that. I continue to assure myself that I'm not the problem and there are people who love me as I am 🙏 It's so weird that I have carried this shame my whole life, needing food and being slow is literally just HUMAN.
Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts and I agree about accepting yourself as you are, and doing the things that you need to feel good :) There's absolutely no problem there. Take care my friend!
Thank you for the tips! As a sensitive guy, I certainly feel things deeper. It can be exhausting but on the other side, being sensitive means that I am not afraid to be vulnerable and can make long lasting friendships :)
Love that, thanks for sharing Rishab!
I too feel I am hyper sensitive..I feel things deeply
Thanks so much Vera. I am an INFP and HSP and am in the middle of some horrible discussions with a company I’m dealing with, so very depleted. It is good to be reminded of our community of separate people 🙂
Hi Judith, thank you for sharing your thoughts. I'm sorry to hear you're going through a tough time with your work, I can imagine it must be a lot to deal with. Take care and take lots of self care breaks!
INFP/HSP here..
I have grown to avoid and sometimes detest people who speak down on me for being sensitive. It goes beyond lack of understanding. They can be hurtful, which only makes me more sensitive.
Excellent video....very helpful! I'm 62 years old, highly sensitive and just watching this has me crying! How many times I heard over the years that I am "overly" sensitive. I even yelled at my mom as an adult....why are you always trying to change me? I also get ....you are so defensive....now I know why! It's exhausting!
One of the things that i have learned, over many decades, is that people who too readily accuse others of being "too sensitive" are very often bullies. Their pronouncements are their cowardly attempt to deflect responsibility for their cruelty.
I found many of the things you said I've been doing them all along, many not even aware it was because of this. I would also add to your video that "recharging" doesn't mean watching Netflix, which I agree with 100%, because recharging for us means doing something that allows us to stop receiving inputs from outside. For example painting, writing, meditating, having a bath with slow music or none, anything creative from DIY to building furniture, etc. where the inputs come from within and so our self can either rest or express itself without pressure.
I am definitely Highly Sensitive. I have the complications of Fibromyalgia, Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, Psoriasis and Menopause too! In the past few months I have started to really prioritise rest, sleep, alone time and setting boundaries.
I can´t go out without headphones. The being 30 min. early helps me a lot too. Thank you for sharing your experiences.
Such wonderful tips, I especially love the second about acceptance. It reminds me of a time I was recovering from heartbreak, and telling a friend that "I am so sensitive and take a while to process... I need to get better/faster at processing." My friend told me that no, I processed perfectly and uniquely how I should. That conversation stuck with me, and has helped me better appreciate and care for my sensitive lil self haha.
*Much love to all my fellow sensitive souls* 💜😊
Loved reading your story, thanks so much for sharing it Nadia! :)
I found my tribe and I am here to stay.❤❤❤I found this channel yesterday, and today I have decided to subscribe. ❤❤
Vera, this was such a good video. I identified with all your points. It’s good to know what we can tolerate and what upsets us. Crowds, scary films, animal cruelty, not enough alone time all drain me. Thanks for another great video!
Yay, glad to hear you enjoyed it Tina! 😄🌺✨
Animal recovery/rescue stories are sad at first then so uplifting! 🥰🐶🐱
yes. And i think about things ALL day. And take things to heart.
Overthinking and difficulty letting go of things are also common traits of highly sensitive people. :)
I will say as a life long sensitive person, when I was horribly burnt out at my hospital job as a nurse, I could not tolerate intense exercise, it would trigger migraines and nausea and ruin a whole day, I tried to “push through” and I came to realize it never worked, no amount of will power could overcome the intense physically ill feeling it would induce. Now that I have been a year out from switching to a lower stress job I have incorporated more intensity and weight training which can help with stamina and guard us from fatigue. My personal experience is that it depends a lot on my current life circumstances how I will tolerate exercise.
Yes great point Clair, it does depend on how you're feeling with everything else as well. Sometimes my body can handle more than other times :)
What do you do now? Are you still in the nursing field?
I am an aspiring nurse but often worry that I will quickly be overwhelmed as I am also very sensitive.
@@nmariekuu Do a few public speaking courses. Join group activities even if you feel uneasy. Dont compare yourself with others. Practice assertiveness. Never say"YES" when you want to say "NO'. Develop your mental muscles. Reduce negative thoughts with a simple practice. Your breath and mind [brain] are closely related causing stress-anxiety. For a better life sit on a chair, neck straight, eyes closed and observe the sensations of your incoming--outgoing breath at the entrance of the nostrils for 5-10-15 minutes or more. Don’t fight your thoughts. Slowly the mind will relax. No deep breathing needed. Do the practice without any expectations. Change happens from within by itself. Day or night, when taking a walk, sitting in a park, when reading, before sleep etc sit or lie down and observe your breath. Like me, make this a lifetime daily habit to have a good life. Avoid constipation as it affects the mind instantly. Best wishes Shyaaam Sir. -Counsellor.
Are your migraines gone?
Okay so the first tip shook me to my core, I already do that and yes my friends and family make fun of me too like 'oh do you have ___ in your backpack too?' but yes I do feel more comfortable and safe knowing that I have everything I -could- need.
When I figured out that I am a sensitive person it helped me to get over the anxiety and I lived with for long time. What you shared is spot on for sensitive people and helps other to have an awareness. Journaling and drawing doodles in my journals helps me to let go of the things that bother me. Thanks for sharing
Thank you so much Pamee, loved your comment! :) Take care!
I enjoyed your video very much. I am a very sensitive person and this video was very helpful.
Thank you Ana, happy to hear you enjoyed the video! 🤗🍂🍁 Take care and have a great day
Thankfully for me I'm only fifteen and discovered this year that I'm a HSP.. I used to have awful anxiety but I am so much better now! There's still much to work through but now I actually understand myself!
EDIT: I literally feel so DRAINED after school each day that all I want to do is sleep and it takes a couple hours to feel myself again
Try to do a bubble or energy meditation before. Scents help me too if you could keep an essential oil roller in your bag.
I’m 39 and same thing here
I dedicate an hour a day just to wrap myself up in a blanket in the dark and listen to comforting songs (or just use sound blocking headphones ). It helps me cope
I never thought about why I prefer to arrive early for things until you articulated it in this video. Makes so much sense, and I feel the same way in terms of centering myself and getting used to my surroundings.
My husband would often tell me to get out of my comfort zone. Usually it meant doing things that overwhelmed me. I asked one day why it was always me that had to do this, and not him.
Now I know where to set boundaries
I was once hyper sensitive. Now i know that some people not gonna change or heal. thank you.
This is a great presentation. I have learnt all these things about myself over the years. However this information wasn't available when I was younger. I really wish it had been, and I'm glad it is now for people learning about them selves.
I'm also sensitive to noise and I realised this is true for acoustics in public places. Cafés with hard flat surfaces, especially the floor (no carpet), are acoustically 'live' with lots of echo. This means the voice of the person you are talking to is overpowered by reflected noise from all directions. This makes people speak louder to be heard and that makes the problem worse.
So finding spaces with soft furnishings and carpets really makes me feel more relaxed while conversing.
Ah I totally get that :) It can be very tiring to be in an environment like that.
It feels like you're reading my mind... It's like wow I'm actually not the only person that takes water, a chapstick and noise cancelling headphones whenever going out. Thank you so much!
Noise cancelling headphones are a real lifesaver 💌
I have always known myself to be sensitive but it only just dawned on me yesterday that I am actually a Highly Sensitive Person. I find it so comforting that this is an actual category that has been well studied. I have also been told that I’m too sensitive and for a long time I wished I wasn’t that way. In recent times I’ve come to accept my sensitivity and to make things work for me, and I do see being sensitive as a strength despite the challenges it brings. Thank you Vera for talking about this topic, I’ve been following this channel for over a year and even though I’ve heard you talk about being an HSP, I only just realised that I am one as well when I watched another video where you mentioned that you are sensitive to the wind (I am too! I bring a hat a scarf wherever I go in case it’s cold and/or windy). Much love to you ❤
Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts Amy! So happy you found out about your high sensitivity, because it can help us to really accept this side of ourselves and do what we need to feel happy and healthy :) Take good care! Wishing you a wonderful 2023
Hello, can I ask for my research, are you vegan?
Accepting your sensitivity, working with it - absolutely. Identifying with it - not a good idea. Don't think of your self as a sensitive person, rather a person with sensitive nature. The difference is small but substantial.
I think there can be a danger in identifying with the label, we should always be open to our own experiences, challenges and benefits with being HSP
Thank you so much for bringing more attention to highly sensitive people. I just discovered that book a year ago and found it life changing. I'm much more able to accept myself now. About time, huh? I'm 65! lol
It's never too late 😄🌷🌱 So happy you also enjoyed that book! It definitely was life changing for me as well 😊
I'm HSP too. I have always view myself as a weak person until last year. I discovered the HSP community and since then, i feel much better. I became pretty minimalist, and have changed my life a bit. I suffer from chronic pain and it's even more challenging for me to confront doctors and try to get a diagnosis. Thank you for the video. It helps !
Hello, can I ask for my research, are you vegan?
Thank you so much Vera. I have been told several times that I’m too sensitive. I was also told that I need to be more “hard nosed “.
You're very welcome Deborah, and if you ever want to read more about it, I recommend The highly sensitive person by Elaine Aron. It's a very comforting and reassuring read, and of course informative :)
Thank you for sharing this! As a highly sensitive person who is experiencing burnout, this is incredibly helpful. I've always known I was sensitive, but this gave me some grace to move forward with the plan I have made for myself to get back to health and recreate who I want to be with my health as top priority.
Hi my friend, so happy you enjoyed the video! Take care and I hope you'll feel better and recover from your burnout with time. Sending healing vibes your way
Please 🙏 share your plan 🥰
@@AnaPaula-dd3in I started focusing on me first. I've been a serial people pleaser and have put my needs last so I started working on putting my needs first. I also looked into my diet and lifestyle habits and took note of the self destructive habits (started reading Atomic Habits by James Clear) and began taking small steps to eliminate the bad habits and replace them with good habits. I experimented with my diet and figured out I am gluten intolerant so I went gf and set a goal of 30 days. It was a bit of stop and go but I'm finally at 35 days which my next goal is to hit 60 days and assess how I feel (so far I feel much better, very little anxiety, lost 8 lbs, less inflammation) I started meditating 10 mins every morning, began exercising 20 mins a day, and began creating and stating my boundaries with those around me. None of this happened overnight and each person is different but I'd say start small and allow for mistakes (give yourself compassion and love while you're beginning your path to health) and give yourself praise everday for being brave enough to begin the journey. You may be amazed by the changes you see when you start with one small habit change and how it snowballs into more changes. I also started sticking to a routine (up at 6:15am, dinner at 6pm, bed by 9pm) this helped reset my circadian rhythm. I'm a planner/organizer so having a set schedule really helped my peace of mind. I also started preemptive striking for when stressful or busy times begin (I'm a college student) so I made a master grocery list, restocked my cupboards with gf friendly components to make meal prep a breeze. Now I can just run through my master meal list (20 simple dinners, lunch staples, breakfast staples, and healthy snack options) and have rotating meals ready in no time and without over thinking. All these positive changes came from me asking myself this one simple question for about a year. I asked myself how much better will my life be if I just take care of myself. Best of luck - you've got this!
@@MyName-kq7hg wonderful and very helpful. Very much appreciated. Thank you 🙏
@@AnaPaula-dd3in you're welcome! I hope you find peace within yourself and find what works for you. Take care!
Hi I was amazed at how many of your suggestions I already do, but unconsciously. Thank you because you make me feel so much more reasonable and rational.
Thankyou so much for helping me feel less alone. This was SO comforting 😭♥️
Sending a hug your way 🤗🌱
you descried me in a way I thought I was talking to myself! I was always not good in explaining myself or the way I feel and this always put me in stress and problems, I always say this is how I exist in the world and completely accepted that no one is care enough to understand how I feel pain and respect it without taking it as a joke or something funny, I feel that in the modern fast rush world no is willing to listen to us sadly. thanks for sharing this with us and bring to my attention the importance to understand ourselves and be aware of our needs!
Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts, happy to hear you enjoyed the video! Feel free to check out my HSP playlist. The videos are a bit older, but they're all about being highly sensitive and they could perhaps be helpful for you as well :) th-cam.com/play/PLpDAC25h6PC8v5bhadp2pKQrK_0e4sd55.html
Thank you dear 💜 I'm recovering from a burnout since 3 months and I'm found my self in your words ! I made some researches about how to lead with hyper sensitivy and this video is the best, your tips are simples and powerfull 🌟
It will help me A LOT! Blesses for you and your journey ✨
Excellent video. As a Taurean, I am quite sensitive and as I've grown older, I've really embraced it. I do most of these things in the video. I also have a little pack of essentials with me everywhere. I love having headphones with me because I can listen to music anywhere. I also don't like high energy exercise, I prefer walking. I am very good at scheduling rest time but its something I had to learn to do.
Thanks for sharing your experiences Michael! Yes it's definitely something we need to learn haha, it's not always easy in today's world.
Very good video, Vera, 'though I am much older than you it helps to find here the truth that sensitive people are not alone❤
It is also important to address that this is also a coping mechanism - because we were usually born into a family, where the basic stable feeling of safety wasn't provided most of the time and we learned to tune into the feelings of our surroundings so that we can have a little more control, be safer, predict the reacting of others by sensing them. So I personally think it is also very important to heal the root cause of us empaths
I agree!
Bruh what's this. I think you might be describing exactly what I think I am starting to realize. Always super analyzing people which makes me exhausted and not pay attention to what is actually said. Probably because I want to predict like you say. My mom pretended to abandon me as a kid and had abandonment issues since then when I was a kid. Maybe I analyze people so much now to see if they will abandon me or something lol I don't know. But doesn't make sense for strangers and people I don't rely on.
I caught myself analyzing old childhood friends and stopped because it felt disrespectful and I didn't want to predict their behavior etc because I love them and they were always nice to me as a kid. Like second parents.
Maybe i don't analyse due to trauma maybe it's just something I was born with but I am trying to get rid of it and just relax and enjoy social situations and go with the flow instead.
Wow there are a lot of good tips in here that I didn't fully consider. I love the one about not doing today what you can't recover from tomorrow! So true!
Thank you so much! :) Happy to hear you enjoyed the video. There's more coming soon :) Take care!
HSP here. This month marks 1 year since I stopped using social media (With the exception of TH-cam and Whatsapp). Best decision I ever made. I never realized how much exposure to all of the bad things happening in the world made me feel so anxious and heavy-burdened. Also in social media everybody's life seem to be so much better than your own (which is obviously a lie, but try telling that to my subconscious).
Awesome, congrats on taking the step! :)
@@SimpleHappyZen Aw, thanks! 😊💕
Hello, can I ask for my research, are you vegan?
@@vendula4791 No I'm not.
Update: Found out I'm also Autistic. The two things are highly linked.
I have never heard anyone talk about this- thank you so much!
You're very welcome Kristi! Feel free to check out my HSP playlist for more videos about being sensitive, if you want to learn more.
Ooooh , Vera thank you ! I’ve definitely always been a highly sensitive person and it has come with its inherent struggles and gifts! And yes ... if I’ve pushed on anyway, trying to “fit in” more with the norm, it has led to burn out and even serious health problems ! ( IE: I’m a cancer survivor and while no one knows exactly what causes that, it’s easy to see that chronic exhaustion, over extending, stress and not enough self care can be a major culprit).
I love and need my alone time, even if that means I can’t keep up with my friends nearly as much as the “ideal”. There are so many gifts that come with being highly sensitive though! And I feel blessed despite the challenges and yepp ... sometimes feeling alone in this, or “weird” or whatever. Thank you for these reminders about self care and boundaries, & this important validation! I am 61 and am still getting reminders from the Universe that I need to further hone my (currently still very limited) skills in gently but clearly & effectively asserting boundaries, and practice more self care.
Haha YES to the extreme aversion to harsh vibes / images in the media ! NOT a fan of violent movies and the like ! I don’t have a TV now by choice. But when I did, I remember blocking out ads that were harsh, while otherwise watching something like a nice Holiday program ! For me, playing and deeply listening to music has often been a positive and therapeutic part of being sensitive. But I LOVE & need quiet, too! Nature is soooo healing! And I love the beautiful, peaceful nature images that you include in your videos. I’m reminded I need to walk barefoot on the Earth more, too ! I’ll try and do that before the colder weather sets in !
Your sweet, sensitive nature is a gift tp us all! And congrats on your lovely apartment makeover! I love the splashes of green colors, your blanket ladder, mirror, rug ... everything ! So joyful and calming! And so cool that you found an actual all wooden coffee table ! That’s hard to find these days ! Have a lovely, restorative weekend, Vera ! You are dearly loved and appreciated. Liz
Hi Liz,thank you so much for leaving this wonderful comment!! I can relate to much of what you said and I'm happy you enjoyed the video :) Also, I'm sorry to hear about your health issues you've had to face, and I hope you're feeling good and healthy now! The nature images were fun for me to edit too, haha. A calming experience. Also, thanks for your compliments about the apartment make-over! I'm realy happy with everything :) Take care, have a lovely day and talk again soon!!
The thing about exercising really resonates with me. I never understood why I felt such resentment towards going running, but now I realize it’s because it’s quite hard on my body and makes me feel really uncomfortable in the moment, even if I feel good afterwards.
Thank you so much for this video! I realized that I'm a highly sensitive person just a few months ago and it makes perfect sense. I can get overwhelmed quite easily, I need a lot of sleep... I also always carry a bag with a few things with me - like water, tissues, and chewing gums :D. I tried to do exercise in a gym, but I really hated it and I always felt exhausted. I started to do yoga every day instead and it feels great!
It's really difficult to start listening to your body and give yourself enough time and space, but it's also liberating.
🤗🌺💕
I'm a 29 year old male. I didn't realize I was sensitive until I was 16. It took me over a decade to find all these things out for myself. The biggest part of it was realizing that I wasn't like everyone else and didn't have to be like everyone else. When I finally accepted my sensitivity and allowed myself to look after myself (even if it was different from all my friends), I finally arrived home. If only I had seen this video years ago. Very accurate stuff!
Always can relate. I have Fibromyalgia and super sensitive. Honestly just learned the importance of tip #1 when I turned 36. Hah. Cheers! No more perfectionism and "illusion of control".
Cheers Michelle! :) Take care of yourself! :)
I am a highly sensitive person who tries to pretend not to be. Once upon a time i was a physically strong person who ran a wolf refuge on the side of a mt. I have always been an emphatic person. Now I suffer from Dysautonomia... which is a dysfunctional automatic nervous system. This has slowed me down grealty. Everything you said resonates so deeply for me now on all levels.
I'm definitely one of the people with heightened sensitivity. I really love and appreciate that you are bringing this up. I think for the longest time people felt that this is something to be ignored. Thank you for sharing these techniques, I can most definitely relate!
Thank you so much and I agree, this needs to be talked about more :)
Nice to know I'm not the only one. I find using my hands to do crafts - in my case knitting or hand sewing of some kind, drawing or painting or even bread baking helps restore me.
Your advice is 🔥 Im not even sure if im an especially sensitive person but i follow this in my life and it works :) preserving energy is key if you want to live an intentional/productive life, what ever that may mean to you. Keeping boundaries, self-care, leaving some, etc..
Thank you so much Anni! :) And I agree about being mindful with how you spend your energy :)
Thank you for making this video. Not many people understand this about sensitive people. I can truly relate to this.
As someone who has had my own mother in law tell me I’m “too sensitive,” I really needed to hear this. Thank you.
Thank you so much you have made me open my mind to new ideas. I am glad I am not the only one going through that.
My boyfriend is always telling me I need to be more tough and that the world is not as shiny and beautiful as I think… I have to say I believed him and I started watching loud movies with war scenes in it. I’ve been getting more tough but I’m also feeling more and more depressive because of all the stimulie around me I have to handle.
Maybe reconsider this relationship. Watching "loud movies with war scenes" will never make you a better person, but it will only upset and desensitize you. Why would a good boyfriend want to do that to you?
If everyone is tough and made for war, who will be there to clean up after the war?
As someone that has been told that I can be "exhausting" and/or am not "pleasant to be around most of the time" since I guess that me having depression, anxiety, PTSD, & phobias = me being a burden, I appreciate vids like this
I'm happy you appreciated the video :) Take care and have a nice day!
Thank you for this video! It was very inspiring :) I definetly need to find new ways to recharge after I became a parent and with a job as a teacher it's so easy to feel overvelmed after work and not being able to fully relax before my son's bedtime.
Hi Marie, glad you found the video inspiring :) I can imagine becoming a parent and having a busy job can be a lot. Take care and remember to take a little break here and there where you can!
Thank you for this video 😌🙏 I've just got my eyes opened at myself...
Yep, this is me. Can’t stand people, social situations, noise, having to rush, too many tasks to do, even clutter or extra stuff lying around. I am a nurse and had to switch to working nights with one patient in home care to get away from all the chaos. I was constantly anxious and having difficulty remembering things. We are all different. Some thrive on fast paced activities and constant busyness and some of us just can’t handle all that.
Actually I didn't know that I'm a one 🤔 but when I watched the video, found out that you were talking about me . Hate the noise, need some time to be alone every day 😒 or I will be exhausted and nervous 😓
really big thanks for this video vera ,it means a lot for me 💙
Thank you so much! If you want to, you could watch my video about 30 signs you're a highly sensitive person. To see how many you recognize in yourself. You can find the video here: th-cam.com/video/j1OxtehkayE/w-d-xo.html
For years I have done the planning ahead strategy and people shamed me for it, since, essentially, ''the need for it is a flaw I need to fix.'' Similarly, I'm incredibly sensitive to violence/pain/sadness so I avoid media with it, and people tell me it's not healthy to avoid, and that I need to work on getting over it. But you reiterating that all of this is okay is really helpful. Thank you for this video
You're very welcome Emily, I'm sorry people have told you these things. If you haven't already and you're able to get it somewhere (or borrow it), I recommend reading The Highly Sensitive Person by Elaine Aron, if you want to understand high sensitivity better and feel more empowered :) I thought it was absolutely wonderful.
Same, i like to plan things ahead even the route as I don't want to panic or get flustered at last minute
I just discovered your channel and this video came up. VERY helpful......I am a very sensitive gentleman, age 61. It has taken me most of my life to realize that it IS OKAY to be sensitive and it IS OKAY to be different. I have few friends as most people do NOT understand me. The few that do, realize these qualities in me are awesome and that I am a VERY deep person. Thank you for a most helpful and supportive video. I am your newest subscriber.
I felt the same way as well..but I turned out to have high functioning autism. I just thought that I was very sensitive, introverted, and easily overwhelmed. It might be something that you might want to check into a little. You never know.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts! It's not always straightforward. 😊 Have a great day
Hello. ☺️ I am also diagnosed with high functioning autism (also called Autism Spectrum Disorder or Aspergers) and I have watched all of the HSP videos on this lovely channel. There seems to be considerable overlap with these diagnoses, and Vera's tips and guidance have been very helpful to me. Thanks!
@@meredithf.1022 💟I really loved this video and found it to be incredibly helpful! Hello back at you!💟
Thanks for your video! I'd like to share my experience. I've always been sensitive and have always felt different and sometimes even inferior to others, because our sensitive needs are usually ignored or are made fun of. I know that a lot of experiences are very harmful and therefore banned for me forever (clubbing, concerts, karaoke, parties, big family gatherings, having children, working full-time in a regular office), but it's okay. I find joy in things that other people find insignificant or boring. I don't need extra stimulation to feel alive. And actually recently I've realised I was autistic. It made so much sense. And I felt like the puzzle was finally solved. Autism is not always portrayed correctly in media, that's why it had never crossed my mind before. I'd like more sensitive people to find answers and find peace.
Hello! I'm the gal who tackled her 30 years-basement of life by removing 1 grocery bag of stuff a week. I'm way more sensitive than most people, on the inside too. I get motion sick, car and boat sick, I can't look down and then up sometimes without serious dizziness; I can get hives; I have senstivity to light, and also get migraines; smells can get to me, solutions and hand santizers and surface wipes makes me feel like the Marianne Moore character in the movie SAFE (like I have Environmental Illness). Yah, so all this and loving the tips. Release our fear and pack that tote bag!
I clicked this video because it was in my recommended more viewing it as a procrastination activity, than thinking I would get much out of it....but wow....so freaky how you pointed out all these character traits that I identify with; I didn't realise they weren't just personal failings...If what you say is true, they are legitimate character traits that make up the personality. This feels so empowering and validating to know.
The shame and guilt of feeling "lazy" and "weak" will take a while to work through I'm sure. Now I wonder if there's a way to harness the empathic mindset in a constructive way, I'm sure that would make the process easier...
Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts after watching my video :) I'm so happy you got something out of it! I want to spread the word about being a highly sensitive person (which indeed is an inherent biological trait) and the positive sides to it, so there's more coming soon :) Take care my friend!
Highly sensitive. But we make good mom's. I avoid too many people. I've been heart hurt by random strangers many times. I try to help my kids be emotionally stronger than I am.
I wish I'd encountered these ideas when I was younger. Would have saved me a lot of stress and hardship. I always tried to take on every challenge that presented itself, in the belief that I could just power through whatever happened. The results were not good. Never too late to make changes though!
I'm sooo sensitive that I have to be careful about which TH-camrs I watch, because I can't tolerate people who talk too loud, too fast and too much 😆 Also videos full of colours, lights and 50 different angles stress me out. That's why your channel is my safe place because I feel really comfortable and even I recharge my energy 🤗
Aw that's wonderful, thank you! I try not to do those things you mentioned, I also don't like videos that are all over the place. :)
Thank you Vera!
I still remember, how much it hurt, when my own mother scolded me for always having needed sooo much sleep.
On the other hand she admired my creativity in music, writing and painting.
Well, these gifts cime with a "price", don't they?
I have come to regard myself as a coenobiont.
"The opposite of ubiquists are coenobionts."
I "can't" happily, healthily "live" or rather thrive everywhere (in the world today), so the 8 tips you named in this video are measures I need to take to my rare "species" to be able to survive nonetheless.
Wow! This really spoke to me. It all makes sense now. Been sensitive person since I've been little and now into my sixties. Every bit of that rang true for me. Now I know what I can do to help with my energy.
So happy you could relate to the points in the video :) Definitely lots of things we can do to feel better! :)
I've been the same way since I was little. I'm now 40 I always wished I could be like other people. I feel like I'm on an island all alone
Thanks Vera. Prior to finding you recently, I discovered Alex Howard of Optimum Health and learned about 'Decoding Fatigue/Trauma' and a Sleep Conference. I am now doing his Reset Programme for people who have experienced Trauma and ended up the Chronic Conditions.
I look forward to viewing more of your very helpful videos. Thank you x Mary
I found out I was an empath by accident on social media. Scrolling through Facebook. I was in my early 60's. I am 65 now. It was definitely an eye opener. The answer to a lot of questions. We are very special people and it can take a toll on me everyday. Thanks for the tips. I really appreciate it. This was a great video. Welcome to the family of sensitives.
🤗🍵✨
I am so grateful that found I am not alone ❣️🙏 your tips will help me recover and will make me handle the situations more better from now on ♥️🙏
You're definitely not alone! If you ever want more tips, feel free to check out my HSP playlist. :) There's a bunch of videos on the topic. They're a bit older, but I think still very valuable :) th-cam.com/play/PLpDAC25h6PC8v5bhadp2pKQrK_0e4sd55.html
@@SimpleHappyZen Hello Dear, I have checked out the playlist.. and found it’s quite helpful☺️ thanks so much for sharing such valuable videos. These are real life saving 🙏♥️
I absolutely LOVE the Fall colors (my favorite season). Your videos are well thought out. Some people do not know how much work and time it takes to create content. I understand, because my son is a TH-camr. Thank you so much for these beautiful images and insightful information. 😊
Thank you so much, that's so nice to hear! 🤗🌾 Yes it does take a lot of work haha. Happy you enjoyed the autumn scenery!
Thanks for this. From a fellow high sensitive lady.
I didnt realize that getting enough sleep is an essential to a (highly) sensitive person like me. Altho I do my best to get enough rest/sleep, it was only now that I learned the "science" behind it. Thank you for sharing this content! Very helpful as always!
You're very welcome, happy you enjoyed the sleep tip! :)
As a sensitive person Iv also found myself as a people pleaser, so much to the point I will inconvenience myself to help someone through a hard time regardless of it making myself happy. I just feel a duty to help. My mom has been helpful with this as she is the same. She's told me how I need to pull back a bit and make sure I'm taking care of myself before I help others, so I don't drain myself in the process. You can compare it to putting your own oxygen mask on when the plain is going down, before you help your neighbor with theirs.
I also struggle with crowds.because of this shopping gives me anxiety 😝 and I love alone time, I'm a big one body ❤️
Thanks for sharing your experiences Cecily! I think it's great you want to help others, and that you found out that you sometimes cross your own boundaries when doing so. Recognizing is the first step :) It's really nice that your mom is helping you out with this as well. :) Take care!
Thankyou so much no one understands for sensitive people like me
Thank you for the loving care and kindness in this video. It's very easy to forget how unproductive pretending to be non-sensitive can be in a world where grind/hustle culture is worshipped. This video was filled with sweet and affirming reminders that my life/time/effort isn't worthless just because I need more rest and accommodations in between bursts of activity/productivity.
Absolutely love what you said, thank you Tia! :)
You described me exactly - So reassuring that it’s o.k to be me - thank you 🙏❤️
It is definitely, 100% okay 🤗