The more authentic I’ve become with late age autism diagnosis and unmasking, the fewer people I can connect and relate to, and that’s ok. Attuning inward. Thanks for sharing, this is nice! 😊✨
I don’t have anyone in my life. It’s healthier than being in inescapable toxic relationships. Never felt happier. I have 2 blue heeler dogs, they prove to be great companions and live in a small village that greets me daily.
An excellent message. Thank you. As a male, aged - almost 70, single again for just over 4 years, i am learning authenticity is my biggest strength. I've come into happiness through just being who i am. I have only a handful of friends, but not having to "fit in", gives me joy. I enjoy just being who i am, and not giving a flying f**k if anyone else likes that or not. I occasionally get lonely, and miss having a lover and close friend, but mostly I'm quite happy and at peace on my own.
My grandmother from my father's side lived a healthy lifestyle, she was very loving and reserved, eternally patient and a people pleaser. She died at 66 from cervical cancer. My grandparents from my mother's side were alcoholics, lazy, demanding, entitled, argumentative, needed everyone else to walk on eggshells around them, had poor hygiene, bad diet, angered easily, the police was often called on them by neighbours because they were fighting so loud. Those fuckers lived into their 80s.
Thank you for maybe saving my life. I couldn't figure out why I'm so lonely when the few people in my life love me so much. And I couldn't figure out why I love myself so much when I'm alone but abhor myself around other people. I'm being a big phony, that's why.
True. Sooner or later this will come up. And then things start to get messy. When you get tired of doing the things they plan but by then they are used to things to be this way.
You make it so easy to relate and feel understood, for these are complex issues that I am trying express for a long time that well; compliments! Interesting about this is also that this state of belonging whilst not fitting in, gets flipped on its head by family and accountancies that think they need to "worry" about you, as "you can't be happy like that". Kind of like being gaslighted by the people that "love" you. That makes me giggle, when I think about it. Thank You!
Well no wonder I've always felt so lonely, despite trying very hard to connect with others. I've been masking my autism so successfully I didn't even know it was part of me until a few months ago. This gives me extra encouragement to do the hard work of unmasking. It will be interesting to see how that changes my experience. Thank you!
Thank you for sharing! that self belonging as the an antidote for such deep pain and loneliness found in society. To go against the grain, not fit in and sell ourselves short, but to learn how to really show up for our own truths and needs. Such paradoxical creatures we are!
Thank you, I needed to hear this 🫶🏼Just by thinking about me being my authentic self from now on (I’m diagnosed with autism too) brings a soothing calmness over me. Thank you so much for this message 🫶🏼 This will be my starting and centre point from now on.
3:13: it is my contention that this, right here, is a key driver of ‘classic’ alcoholism. That the substance itself is not really addictive, else everyone who enjoys beer or wine or cognac etc would be unable to say no to a drink. We all know that’s not the case; hundreds of millions of folks can enjoy a glass of wine this evening, and not “have to have” more any time soon. So what is it then? It’s that alcohol is a de-inhibitor. So people who automatically repress their authentic selves get drawn to alcohol. Because who can resist an opportunity to be who they really are? That’s why so many folks, in Jekyll/Hyde fashion, get drunk and then get mean. And it’s why folks might give up drinking for months or years, then start again and dive all the way in.
How can 'studies' possibly know who's lonely. Most people can report feeling lonely sometimes, it's just like depression or stress or anxiety - all normal human experiences. You can feel most lonely surrounded by people.
If you feel lonely ask your self Martin Luther King's critical question "What am I doing for others". (Even if your capacities to help others are very limited you can always pray for them especially the most despised or hated")
I think a little “censorship” of your needs and traits is unavoidable when dealing with other humans. We live in a world where everyone is unique after all, you can’t expect having more than one person accept you wholly. And that’s one out of 8 billion, good luck finding them. To me, you just gotta find the people you can uncensor the most around
Are you saying loneliness increases my odds of dying to 145%? On a more sincere note, it would be good to have a stat here that makes immediate rational sense as well as an emotional grab. I was to distracted to continue at that point (I have a spicy brain)
I have a neighbor who hates me and my family. He's a lonely, old, broken gay man. He's a drinker and a heavy smoker, and has been in poor health for the last 10 years. He's gonna make even older bones... Such people last surprisingly long..
Hey Betwixt: The Story of You, really nice video ! I was wondering if I could help you with Best Quality Editing in your videos better than your Editor with good pricing and also make a highly engaging Thumbnail which will help your videos to reach to a wider audience ? Pls let me know what do you think ?
To live truly authentically is to connect with God. And that is made possible via accepting that Jesus is the way the truth and the life. He is our bridge to God. John 14:6. I know this will royaly tick of many....🥴but i say this in love. I really appreciate you content. As a human living life with other humans, I love learning how to untangle our annoying behaviours that keep us stuck! God bless. ❤
Thank you for sharing your opinion. I’m not religious but I’m not ticked off either! I am curious about whether you see an option for those of us who don’t believe, though? Or can only the religious be authentic in your view? (This is a totally genuine and open question! No shade, I promise!)
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4:00 "The opposite of belonging is fitting in" - that message is going to stick with me for a while. Thank you for sharing.
Right? Hugely important and meaningful. I first read that line years ago in one of Brown’s books, and it still gives me pause 🩶
The more authentic I’ve become with late age autism diagnosis and unmasking, the fewer people I can connect and relate to, and that’s ok. Attuning inward. Thanks for sharing, this is nice! 😊✨
Yes! Well said. I wholly agree 🩶
I don’t have anyone in my life. It’s healthier than being in inescapable toxic relationships. Never felt happier. I have 2 blue heeler dogs, they prove to be great companions and live in a small village that greets me daily.
Pet owners tend to live longer, and they tend to be happier. I like being around people, but not as much as I like being around cats.
@@DavidAlastairHayden Cats are the best! 👍😻👍
An excellent message. Thank you. As a male, aged - almost 70, single again for just over 4 years, i am learning authenticity is my biggest strength. I've come into happiness through just being who i am. I have only a handful of friends, but not having to "fit in", gives me joy. I enjoy just being who i am, and not giving a flying f**k if anyone else likes that or not. I occasionally get lonely, and miss having a lover and close friend, but mostly I'm quite happy and at peace on my own.
Thank you for sharing this 🩶🩶🩶
My grandmother from my father's side lived a healthy lifestyle, she was very loving and reserved, eternally patient and a people pleaser. She died at 66 from cervical cancer.
My grandparents from my mother's side were alcoholics, lazy, demanding, entitled, argumentative, needed everyone else to walk on eggshells around them, had poor hygiene, bad diet, angered easily, the police was often called on them by neighbours because they were fighting so loud. Those fuckers lived into their 80s.
What did they die off? Did any of them had any disease?
Thank you for maybe saving my life. I couldn't figure out why I'm so lonely when the few people in my life love me so much. And I couldn't figure out why I love myself so much when I'm alone but abhor myself around other people. I'm being a big phony, that's why.
Oh! That’s a huge (and in some ways frightening) insight, but such a massively important thing!! 🩶
Exactly - people expect us to do the activities that they choose. The issues are that one person in the group dominates, etc.
True. Sooner or later this will come up. And then things start to get messy. When you get tired of doing the things they plan but by then they are used to things to be this way.
I almost didn’t watch this, but a voice inside my mind said, “you need this”. So I watched and enjoyed the bits of wisdom as they came down like rain
Thank you! So glad it landed 🩶
Same! God/Spirit is sending this video around 😊
You make it so easy to relate and feel understood, for these are complex issues that I am trying express for a long time that well; compliments! Interesting about this is also that this state of belonging whilst not fitting in, gets flipped on its head by family and accountancies that think they need to "worry" about you, as "you can't be happy like that". Kind of like being gaslighted by the people that "love" you. That makes me giggle, when I think about it. Thank You!
Ah, yes. The well-intentioned but unsolicited advice trap…
I've often felt that big cities can be some of the loneliest places even though you're surrounded by other humans.
💯💯💯
Well no wonder I've always felt so lonely, despite trying very hard to connect with others. I've been masking my autism so successfully I didn't even know it was part of me until a few months ago. This gives me extra encouragement to do the hard work of unmasking. It will be interesting to see how that changes my experience. Thank you!
Thank you for sharing! that self belonging as the an antidote for such deep pain and loneliness found in society. To go against the grain, not fit in and sell ourselves short, but to learn how to really show up for our own truths and needs. Such paradoxical creatures we are!
I completely agree. The solution is surely the most unnatural response to feeling disconnected. It takes a lot of courage!
"The oppoite of belonging is fitting in". Brilliant. I needed to write this and now I need to repeat this in my head over and over.
So true. Well done. You are excellent at explaining truth 🙏
Thank you!! That’s a huge compliment and it means a lot xxx
Thank you, I needed to hear this 🫶🏼Just by thinking about me being my authentic self from now on (I’m diagnosed with autism too) brings a soothing calmness over me. Thank you so much for this message 🫶🏼 This will be my starting and centre point from now on.
Yes, I’m soon to be 64. An introvert, late diagnosis , artist. Yet I still left out. Learning for sure.
🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼
omg i really needed this rn.thank you,
A very bigher killer is living in a toxic relationship with a narcissist or psychopath.
Being alone beats this by light years.
100%
Great reinforcement! Best wishes to you for success and growing your channel!
Thanks! 🩶
Your words are concise and videos the perfect length for my ADDled brain! Cheers!🍻
This is so beautiful. Thank you. Also enjoying the game so far
Thanks, and I’m so glad you’re enjoying Betwixt!
I wish i found you years ago. You're brilliant. ❤
What a great message! Powerful stuff. Also, I appreciate how you get to the point in your videos.
Thank you!
Habitual feelings of anger are I should think as self deafeating as the erroneous concept of lonliness this excellent talk asks to move away from.
Great content, and a great way of explaining it. Thank you.
Very interesting, thank you for that.🤩
3:13: it is my contention that this, right here, is a key driver of ‘classic’ alcoholism. That the substance itself is not really addictive, else everyone who enjoys beer or wine or cognac etc would be unable to say no to a drink. We all know that’s not the case; hundreds of millions of folks can enjoy a glass of wine this evening, and not “have to have” more any time soon.
So what is it then? It’s that alcohol is a de-inhibitor. So people who automatically repress their authentic selves get drawn to alcohol. Because who can resist an opportunity to be who they really are? That’s why so many folks, in Jekyll/Hyde fashion, get drunk and then get mean. And it’s why folks might give up drinking for months or years, then start again and dive all the way in.
How can 'studies' possibly know who's lonely. Most people can report feeling lonely sometimes, it's just like depression or stress or anxiety - all normal human experiences. You can feel most lonely surrounded by people.
Such a profound video. Excellent video.
Thank you!
Excellent. I just discovered you.
Thank you! And welcome! 🩶
If you feel lonely ask your self Martin Luther King's critical question "What am I doing for others". (Even if your capacities to help others are very limited you can always pray for them especially the most despised or hated")
Thank you for this. 🙏🏻
Brilliant!
Excellent. Thank you so much.
You’re welcome!
I think a little “censorship” of your needs and traits is unavoidable when dealing with other humans.
We live in a world where everyone is unique after all, you can’t expect having more than one person accept you wholly. And that’s one out of 8 billion, good luck finding them.
To me, you just gotta find the people you can uncensor the most around
Thanks. This was helpful.
You’re welcome 🩶
Excellent interpretation.
Thank you 🙏🏼
Honestly I've masked my whole life - so I don't have any idea who to present to people... Who am I? No idea.
God bless u ty for helping people ❤
🥰
Quite terrifying actually
Yes, the stats are, certainly!
Are you saying loneliness increases my odds of dying to 145%?
On a more sincere note, it would be good to have a stat here that makes immediate rational sense as well as an emotional grab. I was to distracted to continue at that point (I have a spicy brain)
Thank you ❤
You're welcome 😊
Smart and attractive lady
I have a neighbor who hates me and my family. He's a lonely, old, broken gay man. He's a drinker and a heavy smoker, and has been in poor health for the last 10 years.
He's gonna make even older bones... Such people last surprisingly long..
Hey Betwixt: The Story of You, really nice video ! I was wondering if I could help you with Best Quality Editing in your videos better than your Editor with good pricing and also make a highly engaging Thumbnail which will help your videos to reach to a wider audience ? Pls let me know what do you think ?
Who's lonely right now?
To live truly authentically is to connect with God. And that is made possible via accepting that Jesus is the way the truth and the life. He is our bridge to God. John 14:6. I know this will royaly tick of many....🥴but i say this in love. I really appreciate you content. As a human living life with other humans, I love learning how to untangle our annoying behaviours that keep us stuck! God bless. ❤
Thank you for sharing your opinion. I’m not religious but I’m not ticked off either!
I am curious about whether you see an option for those of us who don’t believe, though? Or can only the religious be authentic in your view?
(This is a totally genuine and open question! No shade, I promise!)
I'm fairly certain they will see faith as the only way to live with authenticity, though I'm open to being pleasantly surprised
I disagree. Faith is a part of life, and to live authentically requires an acceptance of all of our parts.
"Living with loneliness increases your chance of dying by 45%"
Okay, now, how do I experience loneliness...
Oh no! 😢
@@Betwixt_App, what? Leave me alone and stop keeping me from enjoying life!
Lols, that’s naughty!
@@traceyrichardson9550 )
Please stop waving your hands around!!
Please continue waving your hands around. - Fellow Hand Waver, Emoter
You’re welcome to listen without looking :)