“Men Gain Self-Esteem By Saying No To Women” | Sadia Khan
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 13 มิ.ย. 2023
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Why do you speak to such intellectually challenged/emotionally unhealthy women?
Jesse Inchauspe is Amazeballs, but this one thinks Andrew Tate is a high value man and spits ignorance like this. She's explaining a Kardashian mindset, not a Real Woman's mindset.
You don't get high self esteem from losing weight or refusing sex , irrespective of your gender.
You get high self esteem from pursuing a purpose, making authentic connections and living with integrity.
And certainly if you are pumping your face with Botox at such a young age, you are reeking of mental health issues that are definitely going to escalate with age if you think in this direction. 🤦🏾♀️
A man with self control???? Like to see that one!
What channel is this?
TY,TY so...
much for this insight very helpful!!!!!!
@@Portia620 This advice applies to men & women. All around the world & in the media are so many examples of men & women with no self control.
"if you never say no, your yes means nothing"
So truest.
I like that. Thats exactly right.
Your yes is still going to mean yes lol
@@cparksaffluentR/woosh
Deep
This is the greatest explanation for why self-control in men is so important. Self-control breeds confidence. Incredible stuff
Just stop it gabe😂😂😂 give it up
Yes self control does but not like she is saying
@@sfall616he probably watches that one red pilled dude who got schooled by the Catholic girl in that podcast because she questioned his self control 😂
She's talking about "men" i.e. top 5% who have all the options because she wants them to commit to her instead of them exercising their options. She's just basically lying but just presenting this as life advice as if she knows what's best for these top level self-made men.
@@edheldude nailed it on the head. She's saying this for her own selfish benefit.
Staying loyal to one person is good for your spirit and soul.
Too bad most of us can't find anyone who will remain loyal to us. It's nearly impossible in this day and age at least with modern western women.
total cap lmao. Say 50% of women want to be promiscuous and 50% rather be loyal. The 50% that are promiscious you see everywhere, bars and clubs, nightmare dating stories and hookup stories, dating apps, all the exposure is on those types. The traditional couples find each other, stay loyal and move on from this cancer called dating and you never hear about them again lmao@@midnight347
@@midnight347100% unfortunately
@@midnight347I had to leave my last pattern. Everything was perfect, but he was a playboy. So handsome girls throw themselves at him, and he couldn’t say no. I had to detox from him. Seems like everyone cheats
Tell that to women...99% are adulterers.
Nail on the head. Self control is literally the key to success and prosperity. I wish I had more when I was younger.
I think self control is good for anyone regardless of gender.
I agree I am a woman and for me it’s definitely both
Absolutely
Indeed. The latest generations are on a self-indulgence spree. Whether it's gluttony towards social media, food, sexual pleasure & so on. Some self control would do well for both sides during this sexual revolution
You have a point🩵
Totally
If you don't control your passions, your passions will control you. It is so crucial to not give into every impulse you have.
Exactly...Pride comes before the fall...
BS. Passions are not addictions. Follow your passion. That's what the greatest artist do.
@@mfgreviews5028 Follow your passion but don't be consumed by it. Always know the difference between doing what you love and what you love doing you
1000%
@@mfgreviews5028you do know that all the greatest artists die way before they should… hmmm I wonder why?
She is so right. Self control is the result of self discipline. Self discipline comes from self respect and embracing morality. If you feel that you are staying within the boundaries of self imposed morality, self control is very achieveable in your life.
More men need to hear this! 🎯
Yep ! Unfortunately, there are so many boys and kids out here...
We all need both, authenticity, and self-control.
@@lipsticknista5319 Not only that, but this woman rarely knows what she's talking about despite her credentials. She's an extremely professional grifter.
@@asparrow9876I had the similar feeling. She intermittently spits 💯 truth but then says something dubious (atl for me). I liked some of her takes tho.
Also, she's quite gorgeous which kinda distracts me (and I'm a straight f so I can imagine how a man must feel)
Then I notice that her face barely moves and I think it might be botox which distracts me even more 😂
@@anabltc I wholeheartedly agree. Well said. On each point. 🎯
@@anabltc You simply don’t like what she has to say. It’s crazy how often youtube commenters feel like they have some sort of authority when it comes to science, biology, psychology, etc. You people in the youtube comment section are the ones who don’t know what you’re talking about. Utterly ridiculous to speak with such confidence, calling someone out when you have no support for your claim aside from, “Her face looks weird, maybe she had botox.” Please, stop commenting like you’re so educated for the love of God.
@@Wicha329 wym, I wrote that I like some of her takes and she's quite gorgeous. And yes, some takes I don't like and her face really doesn't move. I have not talked from an educated position at all
There is something extremely attractive about a disciplined man. It shows in the way he carries himself. How he conducts himself. It draws attention when he doesn't do anything to seek attention.
That’s false
@@hughjanus2781it’s very true. Especially when it’s real, it’s the people who have none themselves that are drawn to it because they want to know the secret to that self control and discipline themselves. It’s an aura, and it’s rare.
@@hughjanus2781good luck if your a guy.
@@jayayy655I have that! Wow! It’s not helping me as a woman! I need sex! 😂😂. Many many years!
It does show attractiveness your right but a woman still won't say anything to us directly. Its a double standard in my opinion
That is the best piece of advice for both men and women. Thankyou for bringing that up.
Yeah she is 100 percent right
…AND women. Unfortunately “authenticity” contradicts that.
true that@@andreas.9175
Sadly, I think many women do the same and reject men out of not wanting to be messed around or getting in there before the man gets a chance to reject them. It’s a horrible process on both sides.
Now I just have to figure out how to reject all these women who don't even know I exist...
Yeah. Well-fed person telling starving people not to crave food.
She had too much sausage and is now trying to get rid of the sauce they left
😂
😂😂😂😂😂😂
😂😅🤣
It's not specifically about rejecting women, but rather about exercising self-control as a man in public. There's no need to gaze at every woman or crave their reciprocation. It's about focusing on your own tasks and not allowing yourself to be swayed or distracted by the attention-seeking behavior of others, especially women.
There’s a reason she’s mentioning women and food. Both are hard to avoid for most men. Hunger is the first element of self discipline.
And apropos women, it’s not about rejecting, but say you had an option but you avoid, that’s self control. And it’s hard and sexy.
I agree. In the past, I've dated guys who had such wandering eyes in public that it was embarrassing. Just the lack of self-awareness was a big turn off and it would actually make me lose respect for them. Not having self-control carries over to so many other parts of life.
I'm married to a guy who is very focused and intellectual now and I definitely find him way sexier than any guy I used to date. I think when a guy isn't spreading his attention thinly, he becomes more like a God than an animal in my eyes 😂
@@coolbreeze5683 Lol, The animal analogy was humourous. I guess women are so used to preying eyes that when they see a man who is different, they tend to get impressed. Most men find it very difficult to even have a conversation with women, looking at their eyes whereas the reverse is almost a given.
That said, men are extremely visual beings, it's almost an innate nature for them to look at women, particularly the beautiful ones. People have gone a bit tangential on this video though, commenting about rejecting women, etc. but missed her point on controlling hunger, working out and getting disciplined.
@@vrajaramt's the lack of self-awareness some men have that is off putting. I'm married and off the market but still get stares from men in public.
I agree that men and women like looking at beauty but there's a difference when it's a person that is attractive vs. beautiful "objects".
If you like looking at beauty, look at paintings, flowers or nature.
Gawking at attractive people and not having enough empathy to realize the person you're looking at has humanity and maybe feels uncomfortable by your staring is something else.
A person's body is just their shell. Not everyone wants to be stared at, approached by randoms or get unwanted attention based on a shell they happened to be born with.
we wanna spread out seed
A lot of men have literally never had the opportunity to say no to a woman
Underrated comment!
But for men it's not just women. Where are you demonstrating self control in other areas of your life. Grooming, mental health, self development/education, skill/career development, etc.
More men need to listen to this
I think lecturing men does not really help while disempowering and telling them they're no good. Women need training, lol. They've become worse than their mothers.
If a woman plays with dildos or aborts babies, it's her body. She can do whatever she likes. I don't get it
Why??
I personally think it`s a better advice for women. Since they statistically cheat more in relationships, just to force their partner to comform to their wishes.
@@Stormhertug Exactly. Even the ugliest ogre of a woman has a higher body count than the average man.
@@Stormhertug
Statistically men cheat more in relationships
@@StormhertugUm....where did you get your facts from? 20% of men cheat while only 13% of women cheat.
She is spot on. One thing she didn’t mention is that, Women know when a man has little to no self control. Just like Men know when a women is lacking self respect. The lack of self control and self respect shows plain as day. Need to respect yourself first, before anyone else will.
I believe in chastity for both men and women.
But if what you say is true, pick-up artists would get no women and would go bankrupt.
So she is wrong. Her advice should be more for women than men, because women are more likely to suffer lower self-esteem due to hookups.
@@balancer182 If that were the case, then I wouldn't suffer from low self-esteem. I don't sleep around. Never had a significant other either. Granted, I will agree. Both the sexes benefit from the advice the lady is giving in this vid.
@@AloiseRisen 😯If you are a virgin, wow you are high value. There's only like 5-8% of you. Much respect, and you should have no problems finding a partner.
For men, virginity or low body count is still a mark of shame, so if women like you actually prefer a chaste man, louder pls lol, so that men have a reason to save themselves and endure the societal pressure.
I disagree. Of course women want to minimize male sexuality aka having many women in order to secure that high value dude who could have many women. It's all about women minimizing men's mating strategy and maximizing their own.
I wouldn't say spot on... it's an oversimplification. Every human has both masculine and feminine traits to balance and the weak points vary by individual.
I have rejected lots of women throughout my life. The reason why is because I don't let people use me to boost themselves. They're just taking energy from me and offering nothing back.
"I have rejected lots of women throughout my life" -- Yes, because you are so desirable, right? You sure have a big ego.
Exactly
Far more self esteem from rejecting women??? That's pure & utter bullshit. So she's saying if a stunning woman gives a man a sign, he'll reject her to boost his self-esteem. I like this woman. She means well. But she's not a he! Therefore there's no possible way she can know what she's talking about regarding the male psyche!
It's crazy how often you meet a women, & she can't help herself but drop hints wanting money! Sometimes they're just plain blatant! This nearly always happens before you have even been intimate with her! Either way it's the same old story. So hard to find a genuine woman in the modern world! When they're all bloodthirsty leeches looking for anything & everything they can possibly extract from a man! Gets boring after a bit!
Way to go Travis! You can't lose when you say no to a woman who means you no good 😊
People in general develop self-esteem by saying no to things. It's a form of self discipline.
I agree..Self Control and Authenticity is very important
Kinda feel like both apply to all genders.
Kinda feel like both apply to all genders.
Being grounded, displaying confident body language and having purpose in life is key.
yep, I think this is by far closer to the truth than just "self-control"
We all need self-control. I'm a skinny woman with a beer belly. I had to say no to all my favorite foods and stop eating candy, chocolate and drinking soda. Been doing intermittent fasting (14 hours) for two months now and the results are amazing. Skin is glowing and body is tight again. Next step is to change careers. Been wanting to for over a decade now.
Go carnivore
I’d recommend you to visit a nutritionist and join a gym as well. Your life will reach a whole next level in terms of health and self steam
@@diogobz5348 🙏
Still have this shitty job?
Congratulations on your self control. I won't lie I chuckled at the image of a skinny woman with a beer belly 😂
I think self-control and authenticity should apply both men and women.
Refreshing to hear this from one of the ladies. She gets it. Bravo!
I am a woman. Women need to master self control as well. Women gain self esteem by saying "no" to things and asserting their boundaries, especially women who aren't naturally assertive.
Jordan Peterson really emphasises the critical need for women to develop their masculine side (yes, he specifically says ‘masculine side’).
I believe what he means by this is the need to become assertive, as women are biologically and socially shaped as more agreeable.
Don't think it has to do with assertiveness
Just self respect.
A girl can be shy and switch if you try shii.
Some can be very outspoken and still passed around.
@@tegathemenace No. One of JP’s core teachings is the need to integrate our aggression so that the iron fist hidden in underneath a velvet glove is wielded skilfully. He says you cannot be genuinely empowered unless you can stand up for yourself (which is obvious). He says you cannot have self-respect unless you can protect your boundaries and assert yourself when necessary (again, obvious).
I’ve numerous times heard him emphasis women that women are behind the 8 ball in this department because of evolutionary (and socialised) reasons. Women have more agreeable natures because of the need to be sensitive to an infants needs.
@@tegathemenace assertiveness is measured on The Big 5 Personality test. Not everyone is naturally assertive. I had to practice being assertive with the therapist I worked with as a university student. Even after that, being assertive is not something that comes naturally to me, it's my weak point. My Big 5 Personality test shows that I am below average in assertiveness. I have never done many of the things that people regarded as being low in self respect do, but I am just not naturally assertive.
@@chillie000 I have listened to Dr. Peterson for 4 years now. Assertiveness is a subcomponent of Extraversion on The Big 5 Personality test that he sells and taught with at the U of T while he was employed there. Agreeableness is a separate trait in The Big 5. I scored slightly above average in agreeableness, but I scored below average in assertiveness. Being assertive does not come naturally to me. He mentions agreeableness as the trait that allows people to get stepped on and overused, which is true, but he doesn't mention assertiveness often enough. I can't help but wonder how often people who score above average or high in agreeableness simultaneously score below average in assertiveness.
The forgotten value of being a committed married man. You don't have anyone to impress but your wife and kids.
💯💯🎯
❤❤❤
A married man doesn't have to impress his wife and kids either. He has to lead, provide protection, guidance, wisdom. The key is for the wife and children to respect and follow.
@@annabelle818amen sister!!!! Agreed! Some will lead you to the wolf!!!
@@annabelle818so then women must make better decision. Than to accept a less than worthy man.
Self control resonates with me. Thank you❤😊
That makes a lot of sense, self control is key to inner peace.
I totally agree with this. Abstaining from alcohol and not masturbating has levelled up my mind in ways I didn’t even know was possible. 😊
what does "level up my mind" mean?
@@dmitry5319probably nothing concrete, it just makes him feel better about himself without actually producing anything
Never identify with anything. It's not the alcohol or masturbation but being controlled by it. Abstinence has its limit and could harm you if uncontrolled.
@@Bootsystem66Abstinence of alcohol can NEVER harm you. For the majority of people complete abstinence is easier than moderation.
@@royalhumbler2767 You’re been hanging around way too many alcoholics if you think the majority of people are alcoholics. Not being able to consume alcohol in moderation being the definition of an alcoholic. The reality is in regards those with addictive personalities, including alcoholism, is that they correlate with about 20 disorders, mostly mental disorders & personality disorders but others too, for example hyperthyroidism. These add up to maybe some 20%, probably less, the other 80+% have no problem consuming alcohol in moderation. It’s for similar reasons that they vast majority of people giving narcotic analgesics in hospital, even for weeks, don’t get addicted to them, even though a small minority will.
Near 70% of addicts, including alcoholics, , are like that as a result of having anyone of the 4 Cluster B personality disorders, the balance will have one of the disorders below, like ADHD, ADD, schizophrenia, schizo affective, GAD, SAD, hyperthyroidism, FASD, PTSD, or the 7 cluster A or C personality disorders.
For example 18% of alcoholics have Avoidant Personality Disorder & that’s one of the most uncommon of the 20 in that list. Of course it doesn’t mean everyone with one of these disorders is an addict, just that the odds are at least double, which added together basically fills the whole quota.
A man who has self control and takes care of his body and has his profession down is 🔥🔥🔥
Yes!!!
As simple as that! 😊
💯
What do you actually mean by self-control? Waking up early? Not drinking? What is this for? Why does this make a man attractive?
or, do you mean that he does not jump on every opportunity to have sex? Certainly, this makes him look somewhat desperate, which is not attractive
Thank you this was confirmation 💯❤️
Yep, facts! I've recently come out of a 9 year relationship, spent 7 months drinking etc and now I'm off the booze, training and rejecting weekend flings and I feel top of the world. Stay strong guys it doesn't actually take that much 🤙
When you learn to love yourself first....then you are able to love others.That is Key to success.
I realised this many years ago. It's about being your own boss. Not being led astray by things that do and will never benifit your soul.....
This woman is very beautiful and so clever too. Really speaks a lot of sense.
she talks a lot of bs
@@spaceoddity2485do you mean Big Sense ????
I love blond girls
@@spaceoddity2485 Facts! She speak so much nonsense....
Higher wisdom. Love it!
That is such a true statement. About the self-esteem
"Elegance is refusal."
-Coco Chanel
This is so important in many aspects of a man’s life. Having discipline and being discrete. Especially in our current world where everything is on sale.
This woman is 10/10. God Bless her.
no shes from pakistan. a terrorist probably.
The key for a man is self-control. This is a great explanation.
For me, I’m a woman it’s self control. I don’t have to become intimate with every man that I meet once I discover that and I have been doing that for years I feel so peaceful and so powerful.
Yes , this used to be the standard for women. Used to be.
Bragging what your planning to do is worthless. Do it first then talk.
We're not talking about women right now
This IS my definition of a REAL MAN...SELF CONTROL ❤
So what's a REAL woman?
So do women need self control tho?
@MikeKollin they don't think about what they do. We have to be the bad guy to justify their erratic behavior.
Tara and when do you start talking about accountability ,responsibility or loyalty for women? You all act like children as if that all a fantasy pink unicorn game!
NO it is discipline. Discipline is what makes a man, not eat fatty food, go to the gym n workout, work on your business, succeed, provide etc. It is slightly different. Self-Control is like gaslighting men to not sleep around with women. If you are doing all the right things in life, being humble, kind to everyone, treating people good, and succeeding in life, then you should be able to enjoy women to the fullest. It's discipline that's key to men
i agree self discipline is always good for your health and self esteem
Beautiful words spoken from a beautiful woman 😍 I'm all ears 👂👂
Correct. I’ve lost 20lbs over the last yr. Abs are showing now. Takes a lot of discipline
Congratulations bro. Keep up the excellent work.
good work🗿
Welldone
It’s time to realize what my body wants isn’t necessarily what i want !
Great advice and very wise words
This is soooo true. I said no more to a really bad relationship recently, for the first time ever I ended a relationship and it's given me so much confidence. Like its a visceral feeling.
First few months are crucial. Accept contradictory thaughts and feelings and let them go. Don't give in, don't call him.
Welldone
Discipline & structure is the key to life.
Agree with you , totally yess.
Needed this this morning
Yes. 100%. I’m a Hare Krishna and my husband was a monk for 10 years. We have many friends who were/are monks. I can tell you firsthand that self-control and discipline is the cornerstone to healthy masculinity ❤️
The men I know that were/are monks & missionaries, practicing celibacy for some time, and practicing austerities like simple diet, little sleep, and restriction to materialistic gains, are some of the most responsible, confident, empowered men that I have ever met.
I can honestly say that it’s very rare for me to meet the average American that could compare. It’s not that guys fault, it’s just that he has imbibed a culture that values excess sense pleasure and materialism.
Good luck. Hope the monks don't use phones or vehicles. Should be ridding horses... because these are material things made by the man who lacks control
@@Bootsystem66 Do not belittle her point. Her point still stands, regardless of whether they use technology are not. Your comment is not relevant to her point.
@LowCostVideo clearly she's fake. Just watch her wooden and decorated facial expression. I know someone with an ulterior agenda when I see one.
Abortion is a fact and dangerous to both unborn babies and women. Why not talk about female masturbation?
I've not seen a serial killer, rapist that was encouraged by porn or masturbation. Her lecture is misguided.. and hideous.
In fact, she looks dodgy to me. No discernable body language or facial expression you can identify as human and normal
As for the monk lady, I agree with her point, but clearly, not everyone should be a monk. The apology is extreme. Bill Gates, Elon Musk, etc. are not monks, but they brought changes to the world. And they're Western men.... Her point is over the top to me
Hare Krishna monks don't shun electronics and technology idiots 😅 Hare Krishna 🙌 Thank you for sharing, as all of the great religions of the world are based on sense control
Thanks @@LowCostVideo :)
Having the ability to say no to your impulses is the true form of freedom, not doing whatever you urge to do
I’m the mother of two sons and a teacher. I teach self control all the time. It’s the one thing I can do to give them great positive power over their own lives. Great message!
I have rejected plenty of women in my life because I have seen that they will just bring nothing but drama and toxicity in my life. It pisses them but that's their problem. I can't be there for everybody.
Regardless of gender: self control + authenticity is key. She is communicating it in a way as they would be opposite powers.
It went over your head haha. From birth men are taught to be themselves, to do what best benefits them and makes them look/feel good. They do that innately so it doesn’t need to be said, but what they don’t innately do is self control because they weren’t taught. On the other hand women are raised to always put others before themselves, be nice be nurturing and doing what you want as a women in any way is taboo. So we innately know self control, but not authenticity.
I keep listening to this short several times throughout the day.
my good man.. your overconsumption of this content is exactly what she's talking about. . you really need to learn to control yourself...
@@alanh7247 You never know who's hiding behind the keyboard sir. You have no idea who am I. So please.
That difference is fascinating and something I've never heard before. Completely rings true and makes sense and one of the more useful insights
Rejecting unworthy women ( or people) comes from realizing your true worth. It's not the other way around.
This is true for women too. I cannot respect anyone who just let their hormones run wild. Male or female. Living in society, being successful requires anyone to practice self-control and discipline.
“Your body tells you when you’re craving a child” all my body tells me it’s craving is Taco Bell so I should probably practice self-control too 😂
You have very low standards
Wow. Very wise words! Thank you for this.
Can’t state enough how true this is. You always know the score inside your own head and if you know you bitched out on something you won’t feel like you “deserved” that thing you want and you won’t get it
Thank you for giving this incredible message a platform 🙏🏽😮💨🗣️
This woman speaks the truth like she's paid to. I've only said yes to a handful, literally less than five women. Self control is control and control is everything.
Right, as if women as propositioning you left and right. What red light district do you live in?
@@LateNightCablelmao this is facts.
@@LateNightCable😂savage
I’ve said Yes to EVERY women who looked my way. Old young pretty ugly skinny fat married single baggage no baggage. The reason I said Yes is because women are the ones choosing here. As a man I patiently wait, sometimes for years. So no, I am not gonna say NO to anyone
Because you're in scarcity
You sound like the kinda guy dumb enough to tell a girl your actual body count
Guys like you have no options and end up getting attached to low value women past their prime who use you for your resources while fucking alphas they're actually attracted to.
That is so right - self control is key.
Great! We need more of this. Self control
It's a shame society naively thinks self control is possible alone, you need community, you need people for support. These kind of messages just isolate men, and don't create a feelings that men can reach out if they are struggling with self control, this video makes it sound like an either or, you are either weak or stoically self controlled. Why not help people to develop self control rather than blasting on about how men need it, how about define it, guide men on how to achieve it. I'm a man of God and I know that self control is not achieved alone, people need help with it.
you need a community for sure. It isn’t going to drop from the sky, so you need to build it with men and women who respect themselves.
Men need other men and develop a strong community with each other. It’s so solitary living in the west but even more so as a man. As someone from East Asian country, it’s so much easier to bond and form a community between men, as well as women.
Agreed. She's just rehashing some religious or otherwise crude horoscope level dogma which amounts to little more than men are pigs in its implication. Redpill tradwannabe middle age thots really need a market it seems.
You do not have to reject a woman to gain self control.
You chose to practice denial.
When you master your appetite.
Please choose your words wisely.
Not control, Mastery.
Not reject, but looking only with the eyes.
I agree with the gym for both men + women.
How is it even possible to be so smart and soooo beautiful ?!?
Great interview!!
Thank you so much for posting this and god bless her for saying this truth.
This advice applies for women, too. The woman who is more discriminating and exercises self-control instead of making it easy for just any guy to sleep with her….(so very early on) carries a different sort of aura/energy.
The problem is that the media (movies, music, commercials, etc) perpetuate a culture of NO self-control in all areas of life and people are following the culture of “no self-control” because the media glamorizes it and makes it appear cooler even tho it comes with negative consequences. For example:
1) Drinking is glorified…especially drinking to excess. Get drunk …get wasted. It’s considered…..funny, comical. Those who don’y drink are considered bores or not cool enough.
2) Excess in language. Every other word in each sentence is a curse word. People liberally pepper their sentences with the F-word, the b-word. Heck it’s so common to hear people call blessings such as food “shit”. There are people in this world living in abject poverty and starving while many in 1st world countries take blessing like food for granted and call it….”shit”. Mmm…this shit taste good. It’s sad. There are religions and cultures in this world that consider food to be sacred, something you pray over before eating and now many people in the world address it as “shit”. This is a “low” for us as the human race; we are regressing with language.
When the quality of language goes on a decline because people no longer exercise …self-control….with the words they say….then we become careless with how we express ourselves with loved ones and it can hurt our relationships. Look at the divorce rate and how kids talk to parents and teachers.
3) Drama. The more ghetto and loud and in-yo-face we are with expressing ourselves and what happened to us….the “cooler” it appears. But is it? Or is just another manifestation of lack of self control?
4) Even makeup and clothing. My sister came down for a visit after a long time and said, “Is it just me or are women here now showing more skin a d dressing trashier and skimpier than before?” No, you’re not imagining it. There is a lack of self control which translates into …EXCESS….in skin showing and how you present yourself. The more rips you have in the clothes….the more that you let it all them jiggly-wiggly-bobbly-bits-n-bobs …hang out for the world to see…the “better/cooler” it is. You wouldn’t dare dress like that for a job interview or a funeral because that’s when most people opt for “classiness” ….but they will get angry and defensive if anyone says they skanky-clothes are less than classy.
5) Promiscuity…the more people you’ve slept with…is treated like a badge of honor.
People who practice restraint or more self-control in their…. language……their alcohol consumption…..their amount of partying…..the number of sexual partners are….mocked. They are deemed losers and boring by the youth and even those that are older. Self-restraint is mocked in the TV shows too in such a way that people don’t question the subliminal messages that shows send them. Ned Flanders from the Simpsons is mocked for his conservative values and self control by someone as dumb and (lacking in self-control) as Homer Simpson.
tl;dr: The media (movies, music, TV shows, etc) glorifies and perpetuates a culture of excess and lack of self-control which then becomes a part of society’s culture and shapes views about what is cool and what isn’t.
Everyone can assert that both men and women need to have more self-control. BUT……..is anyone questioning WHY our society has become deeply rooted in lack of self-control? Has anyone done some “critical thinking” (remember that term from school?” ….and thought about the ….root causes…..behind the problem of excess and no self-control?
If people can cite the media as being a key contributor to women having low self-esteem because they are constantly bombarded by images of “what beauty should look like”………….then………..can it not be argued that the media also sends messages about what kind of lifestyle is “cool” or “not”….? It sho’ does!
It flew over your head lol. From birth men are taught to be themselves, to do what best benefits them and makes them look/feel good. They do that innately so it doesn’t need to be said, but what they don’t innately do is self control because they weren’t taught. On the other hand women are raised to always put others before themselves, be nice be nurturing and doing what you want as a women in any way is taboo. So we innately know self control, but not authenticity. Women who sleep with a guy early on isn’t out of self control, but out of the subconscious to please him because that’s how we are raised, to please everyone. Life is more nuanced than you know but with time you’ll understand
@@girlsaturn8621 I don’t care to achieve such understanding that you wish me to have. My choices are guided by my religion which prohibits premarital sex and which safeguards women and their integrity. The speaker in the video has kept her language broad enough because she knows her audience will be of different religions and backgrounds. But the speaker herself is also a Muslim and she would understand where I’m coming from.
@@Ayse-wf9es and once again… the point flew over your head lmao
@@girlsaturn8621 And I believe it flew over your head as well because you’ve become immune to the societal trends to where you cannot recognize which behaviors and practices and choices honor women and which ones diminish their value. We’re not gonna see eye to eye and that’s fine. We can agree to disagree.
I assume, when people are truly guided by God/higher power they have a good set of principles already ingrained in their habits aka a result of right upbringing. These randoms trends of appearing 'cool' will come and go, but the right way of living has always been self-control and authenticity to ourselves. If someone has a problem with us controlling our impulses, just imagine what type of person that is...just like eve was tempted.
This is the best one I saw from her!
THANKS FOR THE WORDS OF WISDOM
Can confirm. Holding a boundary firmly is a massive display of strength, and you notice it.
I believe self control actually is the absolute best advice for both women and men..reason why i say this is because exactly as was said..women listening to their bodies..where our hormones are all over the place..exactly why we have to learn to control emotions and whatever as well..
why do we have to control emotions? Why when there’s no control out here today
kids are out of control
parents do want to do the work so the kids are taking over the role.
no polite manners in medical, educational, religious ceremonies, funerals are a party with open bars? everything is out of control
I agree men who aren’t feasting on every woman giving them attention, are more attractive bc they’re not prowling around where women are.
She is 100% correct. I never thought a come on from a man was flattering. Men and women today are really obnoxious with their screaming sexual behavior. Where has the lure gone? there’s nothing left to imagine bc it’s ok let’s go to bed on the first date
This is so true, I never worry about my husband bc he has so much self control it is almost annoying.
Saying no to a women can often come with unexpected consequences.
It's not self-control. Saying no to women is the realization that you no longer need them. You've grown up and beyond them and the meaningless social validation they might represent. In many ways, we leave them behind and they become purely optional. THAT'S where self-esteem comes from.
I do agree with self control in men. But I believe the same stance for women.
Self control is essential for any human being regardless the gender. A woman without self control is a woman you don't want.
A child that grows up with no discipline becomes an adult with lack of self control. It includes all areas of your life. Note how she also mentions diet and exercise not just sexual self control.
Emotional self control is important for both genders as well. Nobody wants a partner who creates drama all the time.
Self discipline is so important for self/inner work but like everything else it's a balance. Some people are really hard on themselves. But in this situation that Sadia is referring to, she's right. You take back power when you can reject and say no. We all have hedonistic tendencies. Some are harmless but some are very harmful for you and your loved ones so choose wisely
That's right but only if you have who to reject ☝️
She is not right , self control is not gender specific..rather then who can't control him her self.. I see she is using a subtle programming for man and woman
Rejecting low quality women really is a super power and I encourage every guy here to do it as often as possible
The fact that deep down inside (especially as a Muslim) I knew this… but had to hear it this way and read all of you wonderful people’s’ comments to fully comprehend this.
Wow. I love pain. More accurately, I love restricting myself from pleasure. Because true pleasure is knowing that the pleasureful things I will enjoy: were truly meant for me.
I love that a woman is giving insight for men. I’m here for it. This is much better than what most men are putting out there
❤She is beautiful.
Absolutely spot on! ❤
💯 true, she is spot on. I have always been this way.
Thats so cool. I loved especially the last bit about treating depression
Not only is this woman nearly perfect physically she is incredibly intelligent. Solid 10/10
she's also cruzing into her late 30s so no...
Stop Simping! She talks alot of B.s....
Such wisdom in words
True Truths ⭐ Real Talk.
Maybe I’m just dumb (likely) but this just seems like a woman’s approach. Most men don’t even have a chance to reject anyone. We aren’t being pursued at all. Women are the ones who have a lot of options, and they certainly seem get an ego boost from rejecting men. Am I wrong? I mean, I have been single since ‘06, so I probably am.
I was thinking that anyone who is being approached a lot would get self esteem from turning some of them down because they would feel attractive and as if they had a lot of choice. They wouldn't be worrying there may not be anyone else out there who would be interested.
As a women with healthy self esteem and who has unfortunately had to reject men, I dislike turning them down, I’m very old fashion so no social media or dating apps, just real life interactions. I don’t get an ego boost but I get high quality energy from being true to myself and following my intuition. I’m always appreciative of a respectful offer though and offer friendship or a nice conversation or compliment if I can. One thing women find very attractive is self confidence and being a genuinely happy person, follow your heart and passions, be healthy physically and healthy emotionally and put yourself out there and you’ll meet someone!! Just keep working on yourself and the universe will provide. Healthy relationships have to be earned through hard and honest work on yourself and cleansing your fears and misconceptions.
@@obsidianbutterfly2857 that sounds great and all but i would question what kind of upbringing you have as well as your husband.
Ive been working on myself for 9 years and havent met anyone. Its a bit annoying to have it simplified to self love and confidence. Ive gone through therapy and life coaching,i pursued my passions when young,ive pushed my comfort zone. Ive approached random women, i workout 7 times a week. Ive learned to be understanding and empathetic,caring. What you are saying sounds cool but not everyone wins in this life. Will i keep improving? Sure i believe its the only way to have a chance at something but lets not pretend like this guarantees a romantic relationship or its a matter of time.
Doing the work with the expectation of reward is not the same as doing the work because it’s the right thing to do for yourself and the greater good. Working with no expectation, because that is what is put in front of you, working with joy and gratitude. Being alive is self explanatory. If I’m being honest your response is that of a victim, that’s not your fault because that’s how we’re trained to think, but maybe it’s time to change that thinking, the power is out of your hand because you were dealt a shitty hand, reverse that thinking, you have the power and control and you can wield your reality to your liking, but the work must be done first, you have to dig deeper. Silence those useless thoughts and be in the moment.
@@obsidianbutterfly2857 thank you for that response. I got some stuff to think about.
This matches what I've discovered about myself quite closely. Shame it didn't happen a decade earlier.
Everyone's so wise and moral in hindsight...
Great Message.
This Is SPOT ON!!!
So let me get this straight.. a woman can do what she wants to do as long as she feels good about doing it?
No wonder so many women lack accountability.
Yeah she just want "men" i.e. top 5% men to commit to her.
Rarely am I actually impressed buy "lifestyle" advice given by the "prize". Well said.