Hi ma Sadia you are really a gem how I wish you could l also include in your content value teachings for new parents esp the Mother to give proper guidance to raise a good human being men and women alike, in this way some childhood trauma can be addressed if not eliminated if parents have a sort of blueprint to glean on and not just grope in the dark by hit or miss in raising kids especially these challenging digital era
Experienced divorce lawyer here. So many men would save themselves from a trainwreck of a marriage and nasty divorce if they simply listened to this video and walked away from a disrespectful woman. Great video!
Men got indoctrinated into thinking that they only become truly happy through marriage. So if they don't have women lined up, they stay and try to fix the problem that doesn't want to get fixed.
Men were taught to think that they only become truly happy through marriage. So if they don't have women lined up, they stay and try to fix the problem that doesn't want to get fixed.
@oneloveoneheartonedestination soul twin? Just move on, if it hurts that's life. Just work in yourself and better things and women will eventually gravitate your way
I walked away to my car to leave I got five shots and one was in my back case still open cause her dad a powerful master mason but my body is the proof it was all close range but honestly this lady is right sometimes we see red flags and blind ourselves. Fellas always value yourself or anybody really value yourself. But God brought me back and even though I lost everything I built up until that point I'm well on my way to getting all that back plus more God gave me a major vision and it's been fruitful and will pay out major soon real soon. Success is the best revenge let GOD deal with any and everything trust with your whole soul and the higher power got you I promise you that ❤
Yep! All that matters is what she does. What she says is often meaningless. What she says is what she wants to believe and portray, rarely the reality.
I just walked away from a beautiful strong woman because she broke my boundaries with the way she thought she could talk to me. Once I left she begged and apologized for everything until I told her bluntly .. it's time to move on it's over. Then she became the victim. It was and still is painful but I respect myself for walking.
"When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time." -- Maya Angelou. Men -- if a woman is not willing to be a fair person or personally accountable and personally responsible for her behavior,...leave immediately and walk way immediately. Do NOT tolerate any abuse or manipulation or disrespect or drama.
I concur. Kindness is weakness ONLY if you allow it. You can always say 'no,' as long as you are polite, honest, & direct. Equally important is to have the strength to stand by your words. This means standing your ground, or walking away as appropriate.
Itnis so true. My Ex was A beauty. But found it odd she was showing off pics in bikini while her male coworjer were commenting on that. I asked her to stop doing that cos I don't like it. Instead off saying ok she rather argue me. I spoiled her cos i Ioved her. And sometimes man aren't perfect too we all have red flags and itnis give and take. But the fact she love getting attention was a big thing for me.
Yea, that hit me too. Right in the gut. I am divorced from a woman who I tried desperately to hold in connection because we had children together. I thought I was doing the right thing to maintain a connection and puzzled out a million ways for it to work out. Of course it never did as it was already over.
Exactly what I needed to hear. Going through it as I’m writing this. When she cheated I forgive her but kept going with the same person and her excuse was I don’t have anyone else to hang out with, here I stepped back and ignored her she went into a roller coaster of emotions without addressing that she made mistake and she is willing to change, she only came when she feels down want me to tap on her shoulders. The fact is I believe in forgiveness life is too short to inflate your ego, but even that didn’t change she jumped into another man in less than month and called me to check if I had replacement ( I said I focused on myself) I don’t need to be in relationship just to continue living. She will come back either to make me feel bad or try to get me back to her, but I won’t pick up the phone anymore. I hope she heals, she was good until she wasn’t. Thank you Sadia for your work
I had this happen to me last year, she was very charming (voice, smile and behaviour). Being in the position I am now (stronger) and looking back I can see her for what she really is, I thank God for protecting me from her and making me learn the lessons needed.
The more the body count and abuse drugs, cigarettes and alcohol in their youth the harder they hit the wall. I've seen so many pretty women I used to know that were in the party scene back in the day that are late 30's and 40's and damn near unrecognizable now. Straight up tadpole to frog, a few are my exes.
@@AKrst3vsk1 Ever read Ecclesiastes 7 or Romans 7? It is true, we all might be simply hypnotized by aliens, who's fault is that? We may never know. 🦋🦋✝✝🤡🤡👽👽💀💀
Young men don’t ever I mean EVER tell your woman anything!!!! She will use it against you she will take things you said in confidence in your lowest moments and then flip it into a weapon against you
This is spot on. I just dumped a gal after 4 episodes of disrespect (name calling). She actually was a pretty good person other than that - but the boundary had been crossed repeatedly and it was time to move on.
4 episodes? u should've left after the first & showed u were a beta male by letting her push past your boundaries 4 times & putting up with it. she already knew you were a doormat. imagine thinking she's a good person after calling you out of your name 4 times lol smh
@NBl-qw8cg love is both a choice and a verb. To insist otherwise shows me someone who is not in a space to self reflect and is most likely a partner who blames the other person for their own choices. You can choose who you are attracted to and partner with, but you need to want to do the work. You are not a victim
@@JeffCaplan313thats a belief system that will hurt you in the long run. Because you”ll see and atract only that type of women. Where is the real proof no women is doing those things in this whole entire world? Take care
Killer video. Wish I heard it before my 2 marriages, both which ended in divorce after I finally set boundaries. As soon as I did, they turned on me like a viper and took everything with the help of ridiculously unfair divorce courts. I’m wiser now, but this video explains a lot and will help that it never happens again. Much thanks.
Some people will only "love you" as much as they can use you. Their loyalty ends where the benefits stop. If someone really loves you, no matter how many other people they meet, their feelings for you wouldn't change. A real lover can't be stolen.
Woman here. Sadia is 💯 percent right. A man with clear boundaries and who doesn't accept disrespect is seen as high value. Also, always be willing to walk away after disrepect no matter how beautiful the woman is. She will get in line if the feelings are mutual. 👍❤
Basically, women need to be treated like children to keep them in line? 😂 Sounds a little odd, from both perspectives. Personally I agree with everything Sadia said in this video, but it seems to me like this is more a problem with women's attitudes than it is with a guy's intentions?
@@MattitudePlays Most people push boundaries in new relationships (like children)...to see what they can get away with. Men and women both. Sadia is helping men with this advice. Sorry you see it this way. But it is just the truth.
@DefineHatespeech The right woman will hold herself accountable and change her disrespectful behavior when she sees she has crossed a boundary. That's the point. Sadia is right... She says that having a happy relationship starts with choosing the right person in the first place. If the woman has been disrespectful and you have shown her your boundaries, but she remains disrespectful...it's time to leave...no matter how attractive or beautiful/sexy she may be.
It wasn't just the lies, it was the absolute refusal to admit the lies even in the face of incontrovertible evidence. She tried to convince me that I was paranoid and suffering from mental illness rather than admit the lies. We are no longer together.
Heard that , 3 days ago I found out mine was having a full blown new favorite love of her life relationship with another man clear back in 2022 for 6 months while living with me and the 2 kids and telling me she loved me and made love to me 5-7 times a week .. she still won’t admit it either and called me a stalker now taking me to court for custody and to stop getting in her business and since we broke up in January she says he’s lying it’s all in the past so just let it go and I just met the man who she was with.. he told me everything and apologized 40 times. He said she told him that her and I split up at my daughters birth but still lived with me to make it easy on the kids so that’s why he can’t come over until she gets her own house …
She just perfectly explained to you , how to be single. She just told you to stand up for yourself, but that a woman will pick the person she can get away with the most.
Very right. Therefore in my own instance, I saw the red flags from the onset but chose not to take them seriously, thinking it is a man's utmost duty to chase a woman until it works or try to change who she is fundamentally. Does not turn out well, and I take the majority of the blame for ignoring the red flags.
This is exactly what I found myself doing. I even thought after the chaos was over "I saw the red flags from the start" and I marched on thinking I could fix them, and whilst the crossed lines weren't cheating or stealing etc, there was a LOT of stuff I didn't address when it happened. I let it build up. That's on me.
Yep, exactly. Men stay and try to fix a problem that doesn't want to get fixed. And women rely on that, they know they can behave as badly as they want and that he won't leave. They blame him for her behavior as a cherry on top.
Wow. Victim here. I feel like I can fix everybody and everybody.... especially her. What a shell of a man I have become. I can't fix anything with a woman who is no good. It's hard fellas but you must you must leave when you are disrespected. Boundaries must be set it only gets worse
Once I had a girlfriend who had kids. My childhood was so wholesome that I tried to pass that to the kids too. So they had great family moments. But apparently she felt jealous of her own kids because I dedicated time to them, so she broke with me. Did I beg her to come back? No. She met a guy who scammed her, so he took the money and left her a big debt. She told my brother it was a mistake to break with me. But by that time, I was already marred. Once I break, I do not look back. There is a reason why we broke and going back will not make it work. I always to my best and if that ends up being not good or not enough, not my problem. Breaking is the best solution for both.
see, you already failed at step 1. Having a gf with kids. IGNORE THESE SINGLE MOTHERS. They are single for a reason. They will never love like they love their kids.
@@tonny9168 You got it wrong. High value is a matter of values and behavior supporting these values. The good thing is that I do not need to prove anyone anything. Thinking is difficult, this is why people judge. She was not a single mother. She was divorced. She met her man at the church, but some years after marrying he started to get drunk, spend the salary at the bar and came up empty handed, and one day she discovers he had an affair. Her only option was to get divorced, find a job and be the provider at home. Her father always kept her away from men, but since this man was from the church, he did not oppose the marriage. That husband was her first man in her life. I know her mother and father, who verified the story. Do you see how bad you judged her? Many people depict church men as simps. This was the opposite case. She thought a man from the church would have the proper values to form a family. But he did not. Church men are just like other men in the street,.
@@tonny9168 maybe you overwatch this new craze of men obsessed with relationships the way women are but they hide behind "manhood coach",alpha e.t.c, because even hard sciences have general laws , theories, postulates but you seem to think that what your relationship 'gurus' tell you are absolutes
Now that I have lived through exactly this for the last 4 years, broken down into these 8 minutes, your words make so perfectly sense. Im just sitting here, smiling, nodding, an occasional giggle. How low my self esteem was, but now I just laugh at myself in hindsight, looking confidently in to the future, knowing I will not repeat my mistakes. Cant wrap my head around the thing youre saying with my mother and inconsistent love, but Im sure ill get to the bottom of it. Thank you!
I think it's to be understood in the following way: they do not necessarily try to deceive you on purpose, but they are themselves unaware of what they believe in. Thus not telling the truth.
@@Kyousei. For many of them it's a career plan - half a dozen divorces & live it up forever. - Why do you think they favour the rich guys or the high flyers?
@@Kyousei. That is just justification for lying. If they know the difference between good and bad and choose to hide the truth to protect themselves, their feelings, etc, that is lying. Plain and simple.
Simply put- don't reward bad behavior. If a person crosses a reasonable boundary, tell them it's not acceptable. If they do it again, it will be met with actions, not words. Then do it! This indicates you do what you say, or, you can be trusted. Not following through shows at best you are all talk, or at worst, you are a deliberate liar. Neither is a good look to wear. I concur with Sadia. Just be 1) polite, honest, & direct. 2) ensure that your words & actions ALIGN. The rest should take care of itself.
@@Ace.0.0.0.easy to say if you physically attractive, not if you aren’t. To allow a physically unattractive male to live by these rules is to basically consign him to a life of singledom and loneliness.
This video was so therapeutic. @ 6:25 explained me so perfectly that I had to subscribe to you. My mother suffered from schizophrenia so I’ve never had consistent love from a mother figure so I always chase after the wrong women due to having low self esteem and it never works out. This helped me a lot mentally
Most guys should’ve learnt this through experience by the age of 25… one of the sad facts you have to face is often once a woman realises you can’t be manipulated she’ll completely lose interest & sometimes actually become quite unpleasant towards you.
Very true. Immature women who cN't manipulate a self respecting man are similar to the naughty kid in school who has contempt for the strict teachers who take no bs and instead the kid will gravitate toward the leanient teachers who let shit slide. Needless to say that a mature high value woman won't encounter these issues as they never exist to begin with.
Theres literally no women like that. Theyre all into it, at some level or another and you have to have some allowance for it. The trick is to impress her on a higher level in order to make her manipulation productive for yourself. No, this is not a contradiction. She helps, she finds the details, she improves and makes beauty if youre on the same path. If theres no path then what are you even doing
When I was a kid, my mom would slap me almost every day. One day, when I was almost as tall as her, I stood my ground and put up my fists to defend myself. She backed off and never tried to hit me again. If you show weakness, you will be taken advantage of. If you show strength, you will be respected.
When I was a kid, my mother used to sit me out on the back porch and feed me with a slingshot every day. Then one day I became big enough to buy my own......
Those women are bad news. And also what's the alternative anyway? Let them do whatever they want? They'll hate you and hate themselves. Set your boundaries and hope she'll accept them. If not, move on. If she wants to be toxic, she can be toxic with the next guy.
No that's like thinking if your father doesn't let you do whatever ever you want, he doesn't love you. She understands that you can be both firm and loving from her parents. It's just a manipulative tactic she uses to get what she wants.
There's a book called Casanova Playbook of Magnetism, and it talks from body language and conversaton starters to dark mind tricks and flirting through texts, it's the real deal
This video is gold in my eyes. She just explained my entire life, why and how i ended up "rock bottom". I am taking these steps, its superhard but works. The bad people leave, and the good ones you let into your life and you love and build your self independently. Love yourself first....
I believe many men who struggle with asserting themselves with women might have been raised by narcissistic mothers. In such environments, any attempt to establish personal boundaries during childhood was likely met with punishment, ingraining a pattern of behavior that persists into adulthood. Asserting oneself could have made things worse, leading to a learned helplessness in standing up for oneself. While I may be projecting my experiences to some extent, I'm convinced that distancing oneself from such a toxic influence and focusing on personal growth is crucial. Embracing your autonomy and worth is, in my view, one of the most transformative steps you can take.
Not always the case. Some men may not look attractive physically. Whether it is height, facial looks etc so it will have some impact on their confidence
Dude you can literally not be a parent who doesnt set boundries. No child can set a boundry, its your job and obligation as a parent to do that for them. Makes little to no sense in context you said it. You set your boundries with ur buddies, gfs etc and with ur parents eventually when ur an adult
I don't know if that's true. It is certainly something I am contemplating. But I don't think that was her message. After all, life = death and yet we still keep trying. So love may = no point, but if you keep trying to fix yourself then it might happen. Just don't chase it. She has to find you.
This is an absolutely fantastic video. A must see for every man. An eye opener. Many times men do not even realise what is happening to them. By giving an inch every time, they give a mile and don’t even realise it.
She sounds so much like the last women I dated, she was also a psych. Very self centred and felt she needed to explain everything to me. Also turned out to be a serial cheater while telling me I was crazy.
Gosh... You've dated the best one😂. To me sounds a bit like rhetoric to explain how women, even bad ones, are still not doing harm, as they "showed" you how nasty they might be... Imagine how men would be treated if they doing the same... 🙄
In my experience looking at close friends and family who dated psychologists, most of those chicks were crazy who needed some hardcore treatment growing up and now are projecting the issue they had into every patient. I know I shouldn't generalize but man, 2 borderline chicks, one with extreme anxiety and heavy put dependant, and two others who focus so much on childhood trauma due to a cheating parent.
Good video, but there's nothing specific here. I recommend everyone to find the forbidden book Mareska Manipulation; you'll be shocked by the attraction techniques it contain about manipulation.
This is a bot. Don't be fooled. Many youtube videos linked to manipulation have similar comments from different accounts created on the same day. Also has fake likes to make it rise on the comments.
@@Tutorials-for-IT The account and the book are fake! The same comment is on many "manipulation" videos by acccounts created on the same date this year!
@@woodysutton4159 The account and the book are fake! The same comment is on many "manipulation" videos by acccounts created on the same date this year!
@@laurivaltter We all make mistakes. In school, first you get lesson, then you get the test. In life, first you get the test, then you get the lesson. And the test will be repeated until the lesson is learned. I am confident you learned the lesson, and you not be tested again. Here's to a brighter tomorrow.
My X realized that I wasn't putting up with her BS. My X attempted to control, manipulate and gaslightt. Soon after, my X left me for a rebound guy after a few years together. I blocked her from my cellphone and I dodged the bullet. Got back my swagger and salvation
Great short vid, lots of truth! I 100% ignored multiple red flags in my past relationship in the beginning & throughout. Can almost certainly say my trauma as a child led me to not set boundaries from the get go. In doing so i definitely clung onto the connection rather than leaving the relationship, respecting & putting my health & wellness 1st. I can now say I've learned a very valuable tough leesson & I wont be ignoring any red flags in my future relationship. Thankyou!
It's not just low self-esteem. It can also be that you have such a great impact on a woman but you don't recognize you can't heal her from certain issues like trauma
This is true. Many years ago I ignored red flags consistently from women & the damage to me was devastating. It destroyed an already shattered self esteem. Now I have zero tolerance to them.
@@slydoskibelieveinc.7748 You have to have self respect & follow your own path. What I’ve experienced is that the more beautiful the woman the more headaches she causes. The sheer self canteredness is excessive.
@@NoName-jq7tj no, it's opposite in my case she was very ugly, still I loved her by heart. Im handsome, rich guy. Still got over confident & cheated me, despite she had proposed me 😢😮
Same happened with me, on the positive note, they broke us and we rebuilt ourselves better than we were before. I'm actually glad I went through that experience, it's almost like they slapped it out of us lol (she wasn't physical though)
That reciprocal of that truth is that the one who does not give out common respect and decency until it is not deserved do not/can not truly love themselves.
2:46 That makes soo much sense value the respect over the connection she is giving you. Currently going through a divorce and trying to understand 😢 thanks Sadia
keep improving yourself man. choose a manageable uncomfortable process every day to follow to build self-esteem and resilience, speak your worst thoughts into your phone's voice recorder and listen to them on repeat to deconstruct the narratives and lies about yourself and the situations you encounter. stay consistent even if you feel like you are going to die. you will emerge as a beast.
As a clinical outpatient therapist who works with equal numbers of men and women, I commend you for speaking candidly but also wisely on this topic. While there are certainly many toxic men out there the reverse is equally true but is not spoken about as often. Women will oftentimes find social acceptance for their toxic behavior which serves to reinforce the pattern.
Every single manipulation tactic all but implies the use of the lying tactic and the gaslighting tactic. I actually dislike it a little calling out gaslighting as a manipulation tactic as it's actually an effect. All manipulation tactics will contribute to it by nature of what manipulation is. Some tactics however certainly take the gaslighting effect to a whole different level. Blatant lies that are so bad they insult your intelligence is one of them. That kind of shit will make you feel like you are in the twilight zone after a while. Here are some of the reasons they do this: To test their control. To feel superior and/or entertainment. This proves to themselves how much control they have over you. In the end, you will give up and you will not leave (trauma bonded). In the process of getting to the giving up stage, you will go through some pretty nasty emotional states ending in massive amounts of cognitive dissonance to swallow all of that. Cognitive dissonance is a trauma defense mechanism where you essentially lie to yourself in various ways so that you can bring back some semblance of equilibrium to the insanity you find yourself unable to escape from. As part of the ‘backing you into an emotional corner’ tactic. This is a tactic where you are manipulated into being emotionally unstable inevitably leading to you losing your shit. This gives the narcissist a big dopamine burst, they feel powerful and superior having so deftly controlled you and manipulated into this emotional state. To finish the little game they play, they make sure to point out how unhinged and unstable you are and suggest that perhaps you need help or medication. Of course, you will internalize all that shame and guilt and the million other raging emotions they have created and swallow all that essentially allowing them to scapegoat their blame and accountability onto you. Bring on some more cognitive dissonance and gaslighting effects. To condition you to expect less respect, and ultimately put up with more abuse. You will tire of the inevitable circular argument trying to convince the narcissist of the blatantly obvious lie and eventually find yourself challenging them less and less as you subconsciously accept the fact that if you do it will just make your life and emotional state more miserable and you will be denied the satisfaction of any kind of ‘win’ even if it is easy to disprove. This is part of the domination process and makes sure all the power in the relationship ends up with them by the end. To turn your mind to mush as the gaslighting effect takes hold more and more over time. This makes you even easier to control. Many times while easy to disprove it requires some kind of concession of some obvious truth that the narcissist can just doggedly refuse to agree with or remember (‘the intentional forgetting’ tactic and the ‘feigned confusion or ignorance’ tactics are often employed for this). So, in fact, it is not so easy to prove when the narcissist refuses to correctly remember what happened 10 min ago or accept sound logic or reasoning. You will just turn blue in the face trying. Of course, in some cases it is indisputable. A phone log or something. My experience is when this kind of stuff happens it wasn’t their intention typically, although sometimes it was. But in these scenarios, you will typically get some sort of angry ‘invalidating’ tactic, with some good old ‘manufactured rage’ and ‘intimidation’ tactics to ‘put you on the defensive’ and get you more susceptible to further manipulation. Maybe something like: “Get over yourself already” followed up by some ‘blame-shifting’ tactics with some good old ‘guilt’ and ‘shame’ tactics, like “Why the hell are you spying on my phone records anyway? What kind of relationship is this? I don’t have any privacy? I don’t know if I can do this anymore! You have major jealousy issues! You need help!” You will walk away as the loser either way. There are resistance tactics that can be used but this is a very difficult tactic to deal with and it is one of their favorites. I won’t get into the counter-tactics here though. The only way to really win in a relationship with a narcissist is to leave them and go no contact. Moreover, Catching a cheating spouse might be difficult, and knowing what local laws say you can and cannot do might be even more difficult. To simplify the process, consider hiring a private investigator to do the sleuthing for you I genuinely appreciate how incredible you are and your work! Thank you for a job well done Metaspyhub@gmail. com,,
As someone who’s been blessed to attract beautiful women whether through the physical, demeanor or being an artist I’m definitely going to share this vid to my male inner circle as it contains irrefutable truth. Sometimes we “Win” in locking her down as a girlfriend but “Lose” due to the motives behind her choosing us.
There is so much truth to this. I grew up that way. Because I never received that unconditional love I accepted whatever I could get from women in realtionships. So this lead to being lied to and accepting it. This lead to being cheated on ect. It took time for me to learn my childhood tramas and see that I was allowing all of this which made me bitter. Boundaries are so important for a realtionship and yourself.
My GF was disrespectful. I chose to buy a property I could retire to that she wasn't enthusiastic about. Then during the pandemic when I was told to WFH, I moved to that property, 200 miles away from where I was living. This has been an effective way to withdraw from the relationship.
This woman is so interesting. She doesn't seem to have the anger so many people who talk about the opposite sex have, whether it's the men talking about women or the women talking about men.
I’m dealing with this past week and yesterday I appreciate it to stand up and infuse great self respect. I have been watching your videos and I have found a fuel source I needed to make a breakthrough in my life at 42. Best regards!! I am open minded to navigate with a current toxic partner that I now don’t trust and cope and arm myself with confidence I need to stand my ground and expect to heal myself for over 8 years of wasted time it’s so stomache wrenching at the thought how far evil has grown being together for so long that the disrespect is out of control like getting out the car and being yelled at and people in the parking lot looking at me so humiliating and I just built callouses and powered through until i recently said enough
You described the last 5 years of my life. After 25 years in a seemingly, mostly happy relationship. It has become painfully apparent that there is no respect, empathy or recognition of my contribution to our family. It's a strange mix of emotion, loss, heartache and yet an excitement to grow and perhaps someday get the relationship that will value and deserve.
The best advice and video I’ve ever seen. I watched it 20 or more times to memorise it. It describes the whole demise of marriage in my life. She picked early on that my mother was abusive and that’s all she needed.
I'm Gen X and the dark side of feminism killed us young boys. I think Millennial Moms tried harder but only ended up doing the double dance of helicopter parenting while blowing the trumpet of "girl boss." Maybe Gen Z or whatever comes next will bring women full circle back to the true female power of nurturing. Dunno. As they often say, it's going to get worse before it gets better. I have noticed that men are waking up to the diseased game of modernity. Walking away (setting these boundaries) will continue to low sex lives and low birth rates but it's at least half up to us to fix what's broken.
A woman that disrespects me once. Will not do it again 2nd time. Because I will be gone. And I just proved it about 2 weeks ago. I won't put up with disrespect. Ever.
The only love you need in life is your own. You don't need anyone to validate you or love you to make you feel better. Tell yourself that you love yourself. That's all you need.
Reminds of that line (Johnny Cash cover of Hurt), "What have I become, my sweetest friend?" A soliloquy to love yourself despite your imperfections. As you say, only then is there space in the room for someone else.
it's amazing what communication and boundaries will do. I told my newish gf that i was doing all the work in the relationship. When I got home she had cleaned my house, did my laundry, and made dinner.
The problem is that it is not natural or maintainable. You had to take action for her to adopt the behaviour. This to me is redflag. It is a play and deceiving.
agreed … honestly I’ve been through too many shit test to understand that it’s just another form of rejection . My tolerance is low for those who don’t have the ability to reciprocate , it often ends with resentment . I’m comfortable in my peace respectfully .
I worked in the divorce court for 30 years. My Supervisor told me, "You know how to tell if a woman is lying? Her lips are moving." Every woman who worked there would deal with a female customer and come to me and report, "people like that make me ashamed to be a woman."
My ex walked all over me for 25 years because I didn't stand up for myself. Definitely, will not happen again with my new relationship. Learn to say no and stand strong with your boundaries
I can appreciate a woman's perspective. I have sisters, so I try to understand, knowing women's shortcomings. I was never intimate with my sisters, so this is the area where I feel like I am walking in the dark. My father raised me to be tough, so I'm not one to allow my boundaries to be crossed. However, since I have been single a long time, I noticed I am easily impressed by a woman's beauty. This was very helpful. Thank you.
It appears after watching numerous videos like these women are simply children. They need somebody to give them boundaries and otherwise hold them accountable because they are incapable of doing it themselves. Why would anyone get with a person like that?
On the other end of the spectrum after setting boundaries, you get told that you are a control freak just like all men & then she continues to stab you in the back to her friends about how controlling you are making them all have an unjustified bad opinion of you. It's a lose-lose situation.
Thank you Sadia 🙏 I didn't receive the consistent love you were talking about as a child and have been working with this for a while now. In you breaking down the mechanics of this, I feel a clarity presenting that unifies all the work I've been doing and streamlines it for understanding and implementation! Deep Gratitude!
After 6 years in relationship been through everything, support and provide. Now I’ve been told “ im with femine guy and not in a relationship with a man with a kid” 6 years together and 0 respect.
Sadia. Thank you. I am a nurse and worked psychiatry too. Your insights are really valuable. I am in the middle of a crisis at the moment and I find it hard to just abandon ship. Over the years I embarked on a health journey to become the most fit person and the more mentally strong I could ever been. There is not a day that pass without me achieving religiously that goal. I see the manipulation, the emotional blackmail very clearly now. How every little sentences I say becomes the start of an argument for my partner, I see how the tables flips around and I am called disrespectful while having to hear many insults and tearing me down comments at the same time. I have a hard time creating the consequence of the boundaries. My boundaries are known, basically dont bring me problems without a dialogue about finding solutions, dont disrupt my peace just to lash out and be overly critical of everything. Etc. Inside of my heart I just want to leave and I feel like I cant. The old me got into a relationship with her but now I am in a different place I can see who truly put the work. Everytime I mention I want out of this toxicity I get the "oh now we see your true colors, thats why you didnt last with your exes etc" comments. Yeah, well. Besides looking really intimidating now, this part of my life prevents me from blooming into a smiling laughing happy or at least peaceful person. I developed anger issues, I react loudly now I am this "I am going to burn the whole world before you come burning me once again" mode.
15 years ago you wouldn't be listening to it with the same ears bro, trust me. Life experience is only thing which makes us open for the truth. In my case it was a big pain when my ex wife left me. I was doing all for her and she was disrespecting me. And she was disrespecting me only because I didn't respect myself.
Avoid any woman that plays games and acts like a child which is exactly what she is describing here. If a woman is cheating - don’t take it personal - it simply means they’re not ready to be a grownup. The world is difficult enough as it is - the last thing you want in your life is to make it more-so.
Very good video. I had my first gf at 41 and she was older but never told me her real age. She always compared me to different men and flirted all the time with other guys. Although I was a weak man, I wasn’t aware of how weak I’m actually am and how immature I was as a person. I kept telling her to dump me because she can do much better. She even told me she had to lower her standards to go out with me a few times. Although I ended it out of love for her, I couldn’t stop thinking about her and wanted her back. After 7 months of begging, she said told me I can take her out providing I pay her £225 for her beauty treatment. Gave her the money and she blew out on purpose, telling me she never had any intention of meeting me or giving me another chance. After being hurt so bad, I decided to retire from women completely until I’ve finished working on myself. Women are very dangerous and manipulative
Ouch I'm so sorry to hear this happened to you. I think it's a good choice to do your own inner work. Not all women are manipulative and dangerous though. There are good respectful women out there. But we attract anything that mirrors to us our own shadows, so own that for yourself, so you can work on these parts of yourself and heal. You'll see that you will most likely attract other women in your life, women that will not treat you bad. I wish that for you.
@@RatnaDewiWithin My Hospital consultant told me I’d have to find an understanding woman who would tolerate my misfortunes and that’s going to be a very tough task. That was when I was 35. Now I’m 43, I feel the boat has sailed, especially after the Jennifer experience, which was mostly my fault for being a low value man. I wasn’t expecting to attract a beautiful woman like her but women have a great sense of smell and she knew I was weak, but didn’t realise I was hard work.
Man you have to be awake and learn the truth by know the power of the red pilled man. You need to convert your self in a real man, an alpha man with balls of steel. Find videos to learn the power of the red pill you need it.
With all due respect this is beyond being weak. Downright stupid to be frank. I hope you have learnt your lesson. I sure have. My ex was a highly educated woman and I was just your average guy back then. Things didn't work out as she kept crossing my boundaries with disrespect. She was begging me for 3 months to take her back. Once I leave there is no turning back. Make
@@mrmysterious6006 I do agree with you about being beyond weak, which was why I retired from women completely. When your like me, women will only use and abuse me. It’s not worth it. I’ve realised from this experience that it takes time to heal a broken heart and that heart can be easily broken again. If you feel your not good enough, walk away and allow another woman/man to take over. The reason why I wanted to see her was to find out why she refused to end it when I asked her to? Why was she possessive when she never liked me in the first place? Why accuse me of pursuing her when it was her that didn’t let go of me? Why ask me to give her chance at valentines after she hit me and verbally abused me for 3 hours? Nothing made sense Valentines incident was my fault because I asked her to be my woman and then told her to find someone else that would suit her needs as I didn’t feel I was going to be good enough for her. I didn’t know how to be affectionate and tried to copy what the opposite couple were doing, but she humiliated me. This was when the overthinking began.
I have a completely different view about this: if a woman values and respects herself to begin with she doesn't need to play these games. She acts with honor and integrity. She has no need to manipulate, lie or cheat. She knows her worth.
Absolutely true!!!! A woman who needs to be constantly reminded (boundaries) that she should respect you and treat you well is just like a person who wants to rob a home but does not have the courage to break the lock. As soon as the opportunity comes they will sneak and and rob the people/place. There is a saying that if a lock is the only thing that keeps you honest you really were never honest in the first place. You are a thief in waiting. So it is with women. Conditional character is not character. Conditional ethics are not ethics, Conditional empathy is not empathy. Conditional basic respect to treat others as you would have them treat you is not respect. Conditional kindness is not kindness. Conditional morals are not morals.
This is true and have known this for the last 2 years after having dated more than a few bad apples. However it is virtually impossible to meet a woman nowadays who doesn't do at least one of these things sometimes
@@niallg3551 not at -church, work, gym, bars/clubs, school, online dating apps- . I think all of those have been eliminated. What's left? Who knows? By design, I think.
Omitting key details is lying, this is something I can't tolerate. When it comes to those behaviours that are contrary to the kind of person she is, I can agree that we tend to ignore things until they become too much.
This video was brought to you by my patreon which contains over 30 exclusive videos and ability to ask me any question www.patreon.com/Sadiapsychology
You have changed my whole life for the best. Thank you soo much Sadia 🙏
Your videos have been so insightful and helpful. Thank you
The reason why I hate online dating is because I don't know who I'm speaking with what or not those pictures are real as well as the person
Hi ma Sadia you are really a gem how I wish you could l also include in your content value teachings for new parents esp the
Mother to give proper guidance to raise a good human being men and women alike, in this way some childhood trauma can be addressed if not eliminated if parents have a sort of blueprint to glean on and not just grope in the dark by hit or miss in raising kids especially these challenging digital era
3:00 Oof. You're not insulting me, you're describing me...
Experienced divorce lawyer here. So many men would save themselves from a trainwreck of a marriage and nasty divorce if they simply listened to this video and walked away from a disrespectful woman. Great video!
Wow a lawyer. Such a high status person. Thank you for commenting❤
Men got indoctrinated into thinking that they only become truly happy through marriage. So if they don't have women lined up, they stay and try to fix the problem that doesn't want to get fixed.
Men were taught to think that they only become truly happy through marriage. So if they don't have women lined up, they stay and try to fix the problem that doesn't want to get fixed.
Yes 👍
Experienced married man here . Curious which woman is not disrespectful ?
When you walk away from her make sure to walk towards yourself and not someone else.
Wise advice!
@@oneloveoneheartonedestination Don't try to replace her with the first opportunity to ease your pain, wait for the one who deserves to come!
@oneloveoneheartonedestination soul twin? Just move on, if it hurts that's life. Just work in yourself and better things and women will eventually gravitate your way
Solid advice here.
I walked away to my car to leave I got five shots and one was in my back case still open cause her dad a powerful master mason but my body is the proof it was all close range but honestly this lady is right sometimes we see red flags and blind ourselves. Fellas always value yourself or anybody really value yourself. But God brought me back and even though I lost everything I built up until that point I'm well on my way to getting all that back plus more God gave me a major vision and it's been fruitful and will pay out major soon real soon. Success is the best revenge let GOD deal with any and everything trust with your whole soul and the higher power got you I promise you that ❤
Never never tolerate disrespect. Always have boundaries and self respect
100%
Women show, they don't tell. Don't listen to what she says, watch what she does.
FACTS
Never listen to a woman. Always watch.
Yep! All that matters is what she does. What she says is often meaningless. What she says is what she wants to believe and portray, rarely the reality.
@@twoweeledsoto6072why? why why why why why
This right here.
I just walked away from a beautiful strong woman because she broke my boundaries with the way she thought she could talk to me. Once I left she begged and apologized for everything until I told her bluntly .. it's time to move on it's over. Then she became the victim. It was and still is painful but I respect myself for walking.
Thats powerful. Thats shows you got Power. It pains, but there no Game without Pain.
@@KS3_Samela not pain. walking away always makes u better and stronger. its a win win
My respect for your decision
I had exactly the same woman……it’s very painful but we’ve made the right decision and moved on……
@@godsbruhit is painful but time heals
"When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time."
-- Maya Angelou.
Men -- if a woman is not willing to be a fair person or personally accountable and personally responsible for her behavior,...leave immediately and walk way immediately. Do NOT tolerate any abuse or manipulation or disrespect or drama.
One of the best things a man can be taught is that he can tell people no. Especially to those he loves and adores.
I concur. Kindness is weakness ONLY if you allow it. You can always say 'no,' as long as you are polite, honest, & direct. Equally important is to have the strength to stand by your words. This means standing your ground, or walking away as appropriate.
Amen to that
@@Ace.0.0.0. you're right
And to walk away. Walking away is a powerful ability
@@Niko132walking away is the man's biggest strength
"When you value the connection more than the respect that's she's giving to you"
Wooooaw, such a revelation for me, i can't thank you enough.
That phrase hit me like a brick.
Itnis so true. My Ex was A beauty. But found it odd she was showing off pics in bikini while her male coworjer were commenting on that. I asked her to stop doing that cos I don't like it. Instead off saying ok she rather argue me. I spoiled her cos i Ioved her. And sometimes man aren't perfect too we all have red flags and itnis give and take. But the fact she love getting attention was a big thing for me.
@@enjoytheplays i feel you
Yea, that hit me too. Right in the gut. I am divorced from a woman who I tried desperately to hold in connection because we had children together. I thought I was doing the right thing to maintain a connection and puzzled out a million ways for it to work out. Of course it never did as it was already over.
the best line for me: "and if she sees that you can't respect yourself and you can't leave her you've already lost her" Priceless!
Exactly what I needed to hear. Going through it as I’m writing this. When she cheated I forgive her but kept going with the same person and her excuse was I don’t have anyone else to hang out with, here I stepped back and ignored her she went into a roller coaster of emotions without addressing that she made mistake and she is willing to change, she only came when she feels down want me to tap on her shoulders. The fact is I believe in forgiveness life is too short to inflate your ego, but even that didn’t change she jumped into another man in less than month and called me to check if I had replacement ( I said I focused on myself) I don’t need to be in relationship just to continue living. She will come back either to make me feel bad or try to get me back to her, but I won’t pick up the phone anymore. I hope she heals, she was good until she wasn’t.
Thank you Sadia for your work
God Bless 😇
It’s been said, “charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting.”
'but a woman who fears the LORD is to be honoured' (Proverbs 30)
I had this happen to me last year, she was very charming (voice, smile and behaviour). Being in the position I am now (stronger) and looking back I can see her for what she really is, I thank God for protecting me from her and making me learn the lessons needed.
The more the body count and abuse drugs, cigarettes and alcohol in their youth the harder they hit the wall. I've seen so many pretty women I used to know that were in the party scene back in the day that are late 30's and 40's and damn near unrecognizable now. Straight up tadpole to frog, a few are my exes.
Guys just coping here, accept that she defeated you and that is over for you. Religion is just a coping mechanism, lool hahah.
@@AKrst3vsk1 Ever read Ecclesiastes 7 or Romans 7? It is true, we all might be simply hypnotized by aliens, who's fault is that? We may never know. 🦋🦋✝✝🤡🤡👽👽💀💀
Young men don’t ever I mean EVER tell your woman anything!!!! She will use it against you she will take things you said in confidence in your lowest moments and then flip it into a weapon against you
This is spot on. I just dumped a gal after 4 episodes of disrespect (name calling). She actually was a pretty good person other than that - but the boundary had been crossed repeatedly and it was time to move on.
4 episodes? u should've left after the first & showed u were a beta male by letting her push past your boundaries 4 times & putting up with it. she already knew you were a doormat. imagine thinking she's a good person after calling you out of your name 4 times lol smh
It took you FOUR times???
@@asdfxcvbn746And you’ve just done the same by name calling and disrespecting that person……the irony 🤡
I’m glad you gained the strength to leave brother Ik it’s hard
It's a test U will pass next time from 1st go
Choose better. Have criteria beyond attraction.
None of them cook or clean anymore.
Straight up!
Love is not a choice
@NBl-qw8cg love is both a choice and a verb. To insist otherwise shows me someone who is not in a space to self reflect and is most likely a partner who blames the other person for their own choices. You can choose who you are attracted to and partner with, but you need to want to do the work. You are not a victim
@@JeffCaplan313thats a belief system that will hurt you in the long run. Because you”ll see and atract only that type of women.
Where is the real proof no women is doing those things in this whole entire world?
Take care
Killer video. Wish I heard it before my 2 marriages, both which ended in divorce after I finally set boundaries. As soon as I did, they turned on me like a viper and took everything with the help of ridiculously unfair divorce courts. I’m wiser now, but this video explains a lot and will help that it never happens again. Much thanks.
Some people will only "love you" as much as they can use you. Their loyalty ends where the benefits stop. If someone really loves you, no matter how many other people they meet, their feelings for you wouldn't change. A real lover can't be stolen.
Yup
Love only exists as an instinct for the survival of your clan and your kids.
The genes serve your mind the illusion of love.
Brada love is the instinct to procreate 😉 that's where it starts and ends
Players only love you when they're playin'.
@@KibyNykraftwell maybe I do want to feel like protecting my wife and kids
Woman here. Sadia is 💯 percent right. A man with clear boundaries and who doesn't accept disrespect is seen as high value. Also, always be willing to walk away after disrepect no matter how beautiful the woman is. She will get in line if the feelings are mutual. 👍❤
Basically, women need to be treated like children to keep them in line? 😂 Sounds a little odd, from both perspectives. Personally I agree with everything Sadia said in this video, but it seems to me like this is more a problem with women's attitudes than it is with a guy's intentions?
@@MattitudePlays Most people push boundaries in new relationships (like children)...to see what they can get away with. Men and women both. Sadia is helping men with this advice. Sorry you see it this way. But it is just the truth.
Wow! Well said 🎉
Unless she is a narcissist she will run away when you expose the truth to her
@DefineHatespeech The right woman will hold herself accountable and change her disrespectful behavior when she sees she has crossed a boundary. That's the point. Sadia is right... She says that having a happy relationship starts with choosing the right person in the first place. If the woman has been disrespectful and you have shown her your boundaries, but she remains disrespectful...it's time to leave...no matter how attractive or beautiful/sexy she may be.
Thanks! I wish I had this information 25 years ago.
It wasn't just the lies, it was the absolute refusal to admit the lies even in the face of incontrovertible evidence. She tried to convince me that I was paranoid and suffering from mental illness rather than admit the lies. We are no longer together.
Heard that , 3 days ago I found out mine was having a full blown new favorite love of her life relationship with another man clear back in 2022 for 6 months while living with me and the 2 kids and telling me she loved me and made love to me 5-7 times a week .. she still won’t admit it either and called me a stalker now taking me to court for custody and to stop getting in her business and since we broke up in January she says he’s lying it’s all in the past so just let it go and I just met the man who she was with.. he told me everything and apologized 40 times. He said she told him that her and I split up at my daughters birth but still lived with me to make it easy on the kids so that’s why he can’t come over until she gets her own house …
@@thewhitetailwizard6615 Sorry to hear that. Keep thinking about the kids and you will get through it.
Literally just went through that for 2.5 years, finally seen the proof. Good riddance.
That's called gaslighting Bruh
This is classic "gaslighting" by a malignant narcissist.
"You'd be surprised at how plain most women are without makeup." - My Dad
Wise dad
Smoke and crazy-ass bullshitery!
Two t's?
Wise mad
Your dead was wrong. He just never got used to women not wearing make-up. The women I've been with looked much better without it.
She just perfectly explained to you , how to be single. She just told you to stand up for yourself, but that a woman will pick the person she can get away with the most.
Very right. Therefore in my own instance, I saw the red flags from the onset but chose not to take them seriously, thinking it is a man's utmost duty to chase a woman until it works or try to change who she is fundamentally. Does not turn out well, and I take the majority of the blame for ignoring the red flags.
1st commenter i`ve seen own it - well done!!
This is exactly what I found myself doing. I even thought after the chaos was over "I saw the red flags from the start" and I marched on thinking I could fix them, and whilst the crossed lines weren't cheating or stealing etc, there was a LOT of stuff I didn't address when it happened. I let it build up. That's on me.
For what it's worth , many of us have been down the same path - as long as we learn from it and run the other way next time
Yep, exactly. Men stay and try to fix a problem that doesn't want to get fixed. And women rely on that, they know they can behave as badly as they want and that he won't leave. They blame him for her behavior as a cherry on top.
Wow. Victim here. I feel like I can fix everybody and everybody.... especially her. What a shell of a man I have become. I can't fix anything with a woman who is no good. It's hard fellas but you must you must leave when you are disrespected. Boundaries must be set it only gets worse
Once I had a girlfriend who had kids. My childhood was so wholesome that I tried to pass that to the kids too. So they had great family moments. But apparently she felt jealous of her own kids because I dedicated time to them, so she broke with me. Did I beg her to come back? No.
She met a guy who scammed her, so he took the money and left her a big debt. She told my brother it was a mistake to break with me. But by that time, I was already marred. Once I break, I do not look back. There is a reason why we broke and going back will not make it work. I always to my best and if that ends up being not good or not enough, not my problem. Breaking is the best solution for both.
see, you already failed at step 1. Having a gf with kids. IGNORE THESE SINGLE MOTHERS. They are single for a reason. They will never love like they love their kids.
You are not as good as you think. No high-value man will marry a single mother. No matter how good she is.
@@tonny9168 You got it wrong. High value is a matter of values and behavior supporting these values.
The good thing is that I do not need to prove anyone anything. Thinking is difficult, this is why people judge.
She was not a single mother. She was divorced. She met her man at the church, but some years after marrying he started to get drunk, spend the salary at the bar and came up empty handed, and one day she discovers he had an affair. Her only option was to get divorced, find a job and be the provider at home.
Her father always kept her away from men, but since this man was from the church, he did not oppose the marriage. That husband was her first man in her life. I know her mother and father, who verified the story.
Do you see how bad you judged her? Many people depict church men as simps. This was the opposite case. She thought a man from the church would have the proper values to form a family. But he did not. Church men are just like other men in the street,.
@@tonny9168 maybe you overwatch this new craze of men obsessed with relationships the way women are but they hide behind "manhood coach",alpha e.t.c, because even hard sciences have general laws , theories, postulates but you seem to think that what your relationship 'gurus' tell you are absolutes
@@tonny9168 Not true. Some are single mothers because the dad left. Incel behaviour🚩
Now that I have lived through exactly this for the last 4 years, broken down into these 8 minutes, your words make so perfectly sense. Im just sitting here, smiling, nodding, an occasional giggle. How low my self esteem was, but now I just laugh at myself in hindsight, looking confidently in to the future, knowing I will not repeat my mistakes. Cant wrap my head around the thing youre saying with my mother and inconsistent love, but Im sure ill get to the bottom of it. Thank you!
" women don't lie - they simply don't tell the truth!???"
& Bait N Switch!
I think it's to be understood in the following way: they do not necessarily try to deceive you on purpose, but they are themselves unaware of what they believe in. Thus not telling the truth.
@@Kyousei. For many of them it's a career plan - half a dozen divorces & live it up forever. - Why do you think they favour the rich guys or the high flyers?
@@Kyousei. That is just justification for lying. If they know the difference between good and bad and choose to hide the truth to protect themselves, their feelings, etc, that is lying. Plain and simple.
If you can't rely on what she says, that it's "technically not a lie" is a distinction without a difference. Leave her.
Proceeds to show how they lie....
You manage to communicate a life changing information in eight minutes, that other so-called coaches can't explain in 30 minutes. That was solid.
Absolutely
Simply put- don't reward bad behavior. If a person crosses a reasonable boundary, tell them it's not acceptable. If they do it again, it will be met with actions, not words. Then do it! This indicates you do what you say, or, you can be trusted. Not following through shows at best you are all talk, or at worst, you are a deliberate liar. Neither is a good look to wear.
I concur with Sadia. Just be 1) polite, honest, & direct. 2) ensure that your words & actions ALIGN.
The rest should take care of itself.
No offense and it's worth reinforcing but most of this should be absurdly obvious.
@@Ace.0.0.0.easy to say if you physically attractive, not if you aren’t. To allow a physically unattractive male to live by these rules is to basically consign him to a life of singledom and loneliness.
This video was so therapeutic. @ 6:25 explained me so perfectly that I had to subscribe to you. My mother suffered from schizophrenia so I’ve never had consistent love from a mother figure so I always chase after the wrong women due to having low self esteem and it never works out. This helped me a lot mentally
Most guys should’ve learnt this through experience by the age of 25… one of the sad facts you have to face is often once a woman realises you can’t be manipulated she’ll completely lose interest & sometimes actually become quite unpleasant towards you.
Lived it but a little later in years lol. That's legit
Very true. Immature women who cN't manipulate a self respecting man are similar to the naughty kid in school who has contempt for the strict teachers who take no bs and instead the kid will gravitate toward the leanient teachers who let shit slide.
Needless to say that a mature high value woman won't encounter these issues as they never exist to begin with.
Theres literally no women like that. Theyre all into it, at some level or another and you have to have some allowance for it. The trick is to impress her on a higher level in order to make her manipulation productive for yourself. No, this is not a contradiction. She helps, she finds the details, she improves and makes beauty if youre on the same path. If theres no path then what are you even doing
@@NDakovic did you make that comment using google translate?
@@saneman7177 very appropriate response dude
When I was a kid, my mom would slap me almost every day. One day, when I was almost as tall as her, I stood my ground and put up my fists to defend myself. She backed off and never tried to hit me again. If you show weakness, you will be taken advantage of. If you show strength, you will be respected.
Damn dude, that never should have happened!
When I was a kid, my mother used to sit me out on the back porch and feed me with a slingshot every day. Then one day I became big enough to buy my own......
Sorry you had an abusive mother that is very traumatic
Samething happened to Me Max ✓
@@tikihutdweller5944 Buy your own what? Slingshot, mother, food, back porch ? Inquiring minds must know!
The real problem is that women think that if you dont allow them to get away with whatever they want you dont love them.
Those women are bad news. And also what's the alternative anyway? Let them do whatever they want? They'll hate you and hate themselves. Set your boundaries and hope she'll accept them. If not, move on. If she wants to be toxic, she can be toxic with the next guy.
No that's like thinking if your father doesn't let you do whatever ever you want, he doesn't love you. She understands that you can be both firm and loving from her parents. It's just a manipulative tactic she uses to get what she wants.
There's a book called Casanova Playbook of Magnetism, and it talks from body language and conversaton starters to dark mind tricks and flirting through texts, it's the real deal
Playbooks? Ugh so over it
Pretty sure it's a scam and how is the author?
how much did you pay for those thumbs up
🤔
fake, these comments are everywhere
Intelligence and depth of character is far more sexy than looks. There are so many beautiful women out there with ugly hearts
Ugly hearts are a dime a dozen.
This video is gold in my eyes.
She just explained my entire life, why and how i ended up "rock bottom". I am taking these steps, its superhard but works. The bad people leave, and the good ones you let into your life and you love and build your self independently.
Love yourself first....
I believe many men who struggle with asserting themselves with women might have been raised by narcissistic mothers. In such environments, any attempt to establish personal boundaries during childhood was likely met with punishment, ingraining a pattern of behavior that persists into adulthood. Asserting oneself could have made things worse, leading to a learned helplessness in standing up for oneself. While I may be projecting my experiences to some extent, I'm convinced that distancing oneself from such a toxic influence and focusing on personal growth is crucial. Embracing your autonomy and worth is, in my view, one of the most transformative steps you can take.
💯 agree.
Not always the case. Some men may not look attractive physically. Whether it is height, facial looks etc so it will have some impact on their confidence
literally my childhood experience...learning to unlearn learned patterns and behaviors now in my adulthood
Very perceptive comment.
Dude you can literally not be a parent who doesnt set boundries. No child can set a boundry, its your job and obligation as a parent to do that for them. Makes little to no sense in context you said it. You set your boundries with ur buddies, gfs etc and with ur parents eventually when ur an adult
“If you want to know someone’s mind listen to what they say, if you want to know someone’s heart, watch what they do.”
"You become strong when you no longer rely on external things to make you happy."
This video confirmed it for me - there's no point in even bothering 🫠
I came to the same conclusion.
I don't know if that's true. It is certainly something I am contemplating. But I don't think that was her message. After all, life = death and yet we still keep trying. So love may = no point, but if you keep trying to fix yourself then it might happen.
Just don't chase it. She has to find you.
Maaaann....😂
When she says women never lie! That is a lie in itself.🤣🤣🤣
ikr
You didn't understand what she said brother. What she meant was, women always showcase their red flags, it's us men that choose to ignore it.
So if my wife tells me she was with Hailey and I then discover that she was with Paul what do you call that? A red flag?@@kratosgod-ci4tq
This ☝🏾
@@kratosgod-ci4tq Hiding the truth is also a lie
This is an absolutely fantastic video. A must see for every man. An eye opener.
Many times men do not even realise what is happening to them. By giving an inch every time, they give a mile and don’t even realise it.
She sounds so much like the last women I dated, she was also a psych. Very self centred and felt she needed to explain everything to me. Also turned out to be a serial cheater while telling me I was crazy.
Gosh... You've dated the best one😂. To me sounds a bit like rhetoric to explain how women, even bad ones, are still not doing harm, as they "showed" you how nasty they might be... Imagine how men would be treated if they doing the same... 🙄
In my experience looking at close friends and family who dated psychologists, most of those chicks were crazy who needed some hardcore treatment growing up and now are projecting the issue they had into every patient.
I know I shouldn't generalize but man, 2 borderline chicks, one with extreme anxiety and heavy put dependant, and two others who focus so much on childhood trauma due to a cheating parent.
Fax
I'm sure never cheated on you, she was just exploring her Sexuality with other people...
Damn Crazy 😮
Woooow. I have been a weak man. Thanks for awakening the beast in me
U R THE MOST POWERFUL PIECE OF GOD]
Roar :3
Cringe
Go get 'em tiger
Argh 🐺
Good video, but there's nothing specific here. I recommend everyone to find the forbidden book Mareska Manipulation; you'll be shocked by the attraction techniques it contain about manipulation.
Can you hint at where to look?)
This is a bot. Don't be fooled. Many youtube videos linked to manipulation have similar comments from different accounts created on the same day. Also has fake likes to make it rise on the comments.
Where can I find this book.
@@Tutorials-for-IT The account and the book are fake! The same comment is on many "manipulation" videos by acccounts created on the same date this year!
@@woodysutton4159 The account and the book are fake! The same comment is on many "manipulation" videos by acccounts created on the same date this year!
If she is talking she is lying 🤥
😂
amen brother
Was it eve that committed the first sin
Nope she is saying the truth really
Whatever she’s accusing you of is what she just did to you behind your back.
I'm chosing to walk away from her again and respect myself. Thank you.
again? that means you didn't do a good job the first time
@@boomshine7i gave another chance aswell and broke myself 😭😭😭😭😭
@@laurivaltter We all make mistakes. In school, first you get lesson, then you get the test. In life, first you get the test, then you get the lesson. And the test will be repeated until the lesson is learned.
I am confident you learned the lesson, and you not be tested again.
Here's to a brighter tomorrow.
@@boomshine7 it's ok..at least now he is free and he was able to rise up from his weak mindset
YOU AREN'T ALONE FAM..
My X realized that I wasn't putting up with her BS. My X attempted to control, manipulate and gaslightt. Soon after, my X left me for a rebound guy after a few years together. I blocked her from my cellphone and I dodged the bullet. Got back my swagger and salvation
Great short vid, lots of truth!
I 100% ignored multiple red flags in my past relationship in the beginning & throughout. Can almost certainly say my trauma as a child led me to not set boundaries from the get go. In doing so i definitely clung onto the connection rather than leaving the relationship, respecting & putting my health & wellness 1st. I can now say I've learned a very valuable tough leesson &
I wont be ignoring any red flags in my future relationship.
Thankyou!
It's not just low self-esteem. It can also be that you have such a great impact on a woman but you don't recognize you can't heal her from certain issues like trauma
It's kinda crazy how nobody's talking about the forbidden psychology ebook called the manipulation enigma
Seeing how much people have praised this book recently, I'm hopeful it will help me with my intentions
👀 Too similar to borlist and shirlist spammers. Also all accounts less than 12 month old. Suspect
This is true. Many years ago I ignored red flags consistently from women & the damage to me was devastating. It destroyed an already shattered self esteem. Now I have zero tolerance to them.
Now you will be treated as the King of your Castle
@@slydoskibelieveinc.7748 You have to have self respect & follow your own path. What I’ve experienced is that the more beautiful the woman the more headaches she causes. The sheer self canteredness is excessive.
@@NoName-jq7tj no, it's opposite in my case she was very ugly, still I loved her by heart. Im handsome, rich guy. Still got over confident & cheated me, despite she had proposed me 😢😮
Same happened with me, on the positive note, they broke us and we rebuilt ourselves better than we were before. I'm actually glad I went through that experience, it's almost like they slapped it out of us lol (she wasn't physical though)
You have to be willing to lose who you love in order to protect who you are 🤞
true that, its either that or you going to find yourself in pieces with zero self-esteem-confidence at the end.
Amen!!! What a good quote
You don't love someone you don't respect. Without respect they are just someone you use to satisfy yourself with...
That reciprocal of that truth is that the one who does not give out common respect and decency until it is not deserved do not/can not truly love themselves.
Lessons I unfortunately had to learn the hard way. This is 100% spot on.
Me too
I wish I had heard your content 4 years ago. Thank you for sharing, it’s really made a difference in my life hearing this.
Me too!
Casey Zander is the master, look him up
My woman loves my boundaries. Took me a long time and a lot of work on myself to realize my self worth
What did you say your boundaries are
@ my boundaries - don’t disrespect me and I will respect you
2:46 That makes soo much sense value the respect over the connection she is giving you. Currently going through a divorce and trying to understand 😢 thanks Sadia
Stay strong! Also going thru one as well
keep improving yourself man. choose a manageable uncomfortable process every day to follow to build self-esteem and resilience, speak your worst thoughts into your phone's voice recorder and listen to them on repeat to deconstruct the narratives and lies about yourself and the situations you encounter. stay consistent even if you feel like you are going to die. you will emerge as a beast.
As a clinical outpatient therapist who works with equal numbers of men and women, I commend you for speaking candidly but also wisely on this topic. While there are certainly many toxic men out there the reverse is equally true but is not spoken about as often. Women will oftentimes find social acceptance for their toxic behavior which serves to reinforce the pattern.
Every single manipulation tactic all but implies the use of the lying tactic and the gaslighting tactic. I actually dislike it a little calling out gaslighting as a manipulation tactic as it's actually an effect. All manipulation tactics will contribute to it by nature of what manipulation is. Some tactics however certainly take the gaslighting effect to a whole different level. Blatant lies that are so bad they insult your intelligence is one of them. That kind of shit will make you feel like you are in the twilight zone after a while. Here are some of the reasons they do this: To test their control. To feel superior and/or entertainment. This proves to themselves how much control they have over you. In the end, you will give up and you will not leave (trauma bonded). In the process of getting to the giving up stage, you will go through some pretty nasty emotional states ending in massive amounts of cognitive dissonance to swallow all of that. Cognitive dissonance is a trauma defense mechanism where you essentially lie to yourself in various ways so that you can bring back some semblance of equilibrium to the insanity you find yourself unable to escape from. As part of the ‘backing you into an emotional corner’ tactic. This is a tactic where you are manipulated into being emotionally unstable inevitably leading to you losing your shit. This gives the narcissist a big dopamine burst, they feel powerful and superior having so deftly controlled you and manipulated into this emotional state. To finish the little game they play, they make sure to point out how unhinged and unstable you are and suggest that perhaps you need help or medication. Of course, you will internalize all that shame and guilt and the million other raging emotions they have created and swallow all that essentially allowing them to scapegoat their blame and accountability onto you. Bring on some more cognitive dissonance and gaslighting effects. To condition you to expect less respect, and ultimately put up with more abuse. You will tire of the inevitable circular argument trying to convince the narcissist of the blatantly obvious lie and eventually find yourself challenging them less and less as you subconsciously accept the fact that if you do it will just make your life and emotional state more miserable and you will be denied the satisfaction of any kind of ‘win’ even if it is easy to disprove. This is part of the domination process and makes sure all the power in the relationship ends up with them by the end. To turn your mind to mush as the gaslighting effect takes hold more and more over time. This makes you even easier to control. Many times while easy to disprove it requires some kind of concession of some obvious truth that the narcissist can just doggedly refuse to agree with or remember (‘the intentional forgetting’ tactic and the ‘feigned confusion or ignorance’ tactics are often employed for this). So, in fact, it is not so easy to prove when the narcissist refuses to correctly remember what happened 10 min ago or accept sound logic or reasoning. You will just turn blue in the face trying. Of course, in some cases it is indisputable. A phone log or something. My experience is when this kind of stuff happens it wasn’t their intention typically, although sometimes it was. But in these scenarios, you will typically get some sort of angry ‘invalidating’ tactic, with some good old ‘manufactured rage’ and ‘intimidation’ tactics to ‘put you on the defensive’ and get you more susceptible to further manipulation. Maybe something like: “Get over yourself already” followed up by some ‘blame-shifting’ tactics with some good old ‘guilt’ and ‘shame’ tactics, like “Why the hell are you spying on my phone records anyway? What kind of relationship is this? I don’t have any privacy? I don’t know if I can do this anymore! You have major jealousy issues! You need help!” You will walk away as the loser either way. There are resistance tactics that can be used but this is a very difficult tactic to deal with and it is one of their favorites. I won’t get into the counter-tactics here though. The only way to really win in a relationship with a narcissist is to leave them and go no contact. Moreover, Catching a cheating spouse might be difficult, and knowing what local laws say you can and cannot do might be even more difficult. To simplify the process, consider hiring a private investigator to do the sleuthing for you I genuinely appreciate how incredible you are and your work! Thank you for a job well done Metaspyhub@gmail. com,,
I aint reading all that
Wow this is so interesting... Please continue to counter tactics
Every victim needs to read this
@@nehemirador5333 Me neither 😂
As someone who’s been blessed to attract beautiful women whether through the physical, demeanor or being an artist I’m definitely going to share this vid to my male inner circle as it contains irrefutable truth. Sometimes we “Win” in locking her down as a girlfriend but “Lose” due to the motives behind her choosing us.
That last sentence. I can relate so much to that haha
last thing was very wise!
@@facelessandnameless ikr lol
@@svtk5104 much appreciated 🙏🏾
Effectively, actions speaks LOUDER than words.
By action, mean body language. Demeanors is a better tell tale sign
I just love to see this lady talk. When I hear talking and see you're talking I just love it.
There is so much truth to this. I grew up that way. Because I never received that unconditional love I accepted whatever I could get from women in realtionships. So this lead to being lied to and accepting it. This lead to being cheated on ect. It took time for me to learn my childhood tramas and see that I was allowing all of this which made me bitter. Boundaries are so important for a realtionship and yourself.
♥
I went silent and now I avoid them... too manipulative, even to complete strangers.
I liken that to pure evil.
Manipulation is accomplished through lying. So when Sadia said in the beginning that women never lie, she was lying.
BillKlacks is cool too?
My GF was disrespectful. I chose to buy a property I could retire to that she wasn't enthusiastic about. Then during the pandemic when I was told to WFH, I moved to that property, 200 miles away from where I was living. This has been an effective way to withdraw from the relationship.
This woman is so interesting. She doesn't seem to have the anger so many people who talk about the opposite sex have, whether it's the men talking about women or the women talking about men.
Couldn’t agree more
She’s selling something and she knows her target audience.
@sloebone7399 💯 but she's good at it and she knows it! 😅
Her anger does come out against men
@@sloebone7399 she is selling the truth. At least you know it's correct.
I’m dealing with this past week and yesterday I appreciate it to stand up and infuse great self respect. I have been watching your videos and I have found a fuel source I needed to make a breakthrough in my life at 42. Best regards!! I am open minded to navigate with a current toxic partner that I now don’t trust and cope and arm myself with confidence I need to stand my ground and expect to heal myself for over 8 years of wasted time it’s so stomache wrenching at the thought how far evil has grown being together for so long that the disrespect is out of control like getting out the car and being yelled at and people in the parking lot looking at me so humiliating and I just built callouses and powered through until i recently said enough
You described the last 5 years of my life. After 25 years in a seemingly, mostly happy relationship. It has become painfully apparent that there is no respect, empathy or recognition of my contribution to our family. It's a strange mix of emotion, loss, heartache and yet an excitement to grow and perhaps someday get the relationship that will value and deserve.
You couldnt be more correct on this . SPOT ON
Guys, go your own way. No woman, no problem.
True.
I agree 💪
that aint what she's saying, she's saying real strong men should have boundaries and selfrespect
@@elcheleloco What is your definition of a "real strong man" ? Are you a "real strong man"?
@@elcheleloco That's not going to help you with the modern Western woman when she calls her pimp. {the government}
The best advice and video I’ve ever seen. I watched it 20 or more times to memorise it. It describes the whole demise of marriage in my life. She picked early on that my mother was abusive and that’s all she needed.
I'm Gen X and the dark side of feminism killed us young boys. I think Millennial Moms tried harder but only ended up doing the double dance of helicopter parenting while blowing the trumpet of "girl boss." Maybe Gen Z or whatever comes next will bring women full circle back to the true female power of nurturing. Dunno.
As they often say, it's going to get worse before it gets better. I have noticed that men are waking up to the diseased game of modernity. Walking away (setting these boundaries) will continue to low sex lives and low birth rates but it's at least half up to us to fix what's broken.
A woman that disrespects me once. Will not do it again 2nd time. Because I will be gone. And I just proved it about 2 weeks ago. I won't put up with disrespect. Ever.
👑👑
The only love you need in life is your own. You don't need anyone to validate you or love you to make you feel better. Tell yourself that you love yourself. That's all you need.
Reminds of that line (Johnny Cash cover of Hurt), "What have I become, my sweetest friend?" A soliloquy to love yourself despite your imperfections. As you say, only then is there space in the room for someone else.
it's amazing what communication and boundaries will do. I told my newish gf that i was doing all the work in the relationship. When I got home she had cleaned my house, did my laundry, and made dinner.
The problem is that it is not natural or maintainable. You had to take action for her to adopt the behaviour.
This to me is redflag. It is a play and deceiving.
agreed … honestly I’ve been through too many shit test to understand that it’s just another form of rejection . My tolerance is low for those who don’t have the ability to reciprocate , it often ends with resentment . I’m comfortable in my peace respectfully .
I worked in the divorce court for 30 years. My Supervisor told me, "You know how to tell if a woman is lying? Her lips are moving."
Every woman who worked there would deal with a female customer and come to me and report, "people like that make me ashamed to be a woman."
My ex walked all over me for 25 years because I didn't stand up for myself. Definitely, will not happen again with my new relationship. Learn to say no and stand strong with your boundaries
I can appreciate a woman's perspective. I have sisters, so I try to understand, knowing women's shortcomings. I was never intimate with my sisters, so this is the area where I feel like I am walking in the dark. My father raised me to be tough, so I'm not one to allow my boundaries to be crossed. However, since I have been single a long time, I noticed I am easily impressed by a woman's beauty. This was very helpful. Thank you.
It appears after watching numerous videos like these women are simply children. They need somebody to give them boundaries and otherwise hold them accountable because they are incapable of doing it themselves. Why would anyone get with a person like that?
On the other end of the spectrum after setting boundaries, you get told that you are a control freak just like all men & then she continues to stab you in the back to her friends about how controlling you are making them all have an unjustified bad opinion of you. It's a lose-lose situation.
yeah just be homosexual, problem solved Bradley.
To clean your house and cook your meal
As mundane as might come across., this is exactly it - and Sons too We like Sons 💪🏾 @@mikkischuk3634
😂 I guess you took the easy way out huh? @@orionp.9476
Thank you Sadia 🙏 I didn't receive the consistent love you were talking about as a child and have been working with this for a while now. In you breaking down the mechanics of this, I feel a clarity presenting that unifies all the work I've been doing and streamlines it for understanding and implementation! Deep Gratitude!
After 6 years in relationship been through everything, support and provide. Now I’ve been told “ im with femine guy and not in a relationship with a man with a kid” 6 years together and 0 respect.
Hiding the truth is called lying!
That is one of my boundaries..🤷♂️
Facts hitting hard thank you Sadia! 47 year old lad out here
Just 2 minutes into her video, she speaks absolute truth. Thank you!
It all comes down to self awareness. Then comes self respect and compassion. Our world is but a mere reflection of who we are...stay strong!
Sadia. Thank you. I am a nurse and worked psychiatry too. Your insights are really valuable. I am in the middle of a crisis at the moment and I find it hard to just abandon ship. Over the years I embarked on a health journey to become the most fit person and the more mentally strong I could ever been. There is not a day that pass without me achieving religiously that goal. I see the manipulation, the emotional blackmail very clearly now. How every little sentences I say becomes the start of an argument for my partner, I see how the tables flips around and I am called disrespectful while having to hear many insults and tearing me down comments at the same time. I have a hard time creating the consequence of the boundaries. My boundaries are known, basically dont bring me problems without a dialogue about finding solutions, dont disrupt my peace just to lash out and be overly critical of everything. Etc. Inside of my heart I just want to leave and I feel like I cant. The old me got into a relationship with her but now I am in a different place I can see who truly put the work. Everytime I mention I want out of this toxicity I get the "oh now we see your true colors, thats why you didnt last with your exes etc" comments. Yeah, well. Besides looking really intimidating now, this part of my life prevents me from blooming into a smiling laughing happy or at least peaceful person. I developed anger issues, I react loudly now I am this "I am going to burn the whole world before you come burning me once again" mode.
Wow - This is spot on - I am actually shocked how spot on this is. You have described me and my relationship to perfection...This has to end
Yes I have been there
That's why I hate online dating
Face to face
It is truly shocking how well you can lay this out. I needed this advice 15 years ago, thank you!
15 years ago you wouldn't be listening to it with the same ears bro, trust me. Life experience is only thing which makes us open for the truth. In my case it was a big pain when my ex wife left me.
I was doing all for her and she was disrespecting me. And she was disrespecting me only because I didn't respect myself.
Maam!
This is the best video I’ve come across
No BS but only valuable content
Avoid any woman that plays games and acts like a child which is exactly what she is describing here. If a woman is cheating - don’t take it personal - it simply means they’re not ready to be a grownup.
The world is difficult enough as it is - the last thing you want in your life is to make it more-so.
That’s a good way to look at it. They aren’t worthy of you if they are cheating
Simply they have too many options and also no consequences for cheating...sums it up
“Women never lie”…I’ve heard enough internet BS for today…and it’s only 4:00 in the morning
Have you watched the vid? If you haven’t woman shows her red flags in her actions.
Lmao
I could almost give you a hug for so much truth and love
Very good video. I had my first gf at 41 and she was older but never told me her real age. She always compared me to different men and flirted all the time with other guys.
Although I was a weak man, I wasn’t aware of how weak I’m actually am and how immature I was as a person.
I kept telling her to dump me because she can do much better. She even told me she had to lower her standards to go out with me a few times.
Although I ended it out of love for her, I couldn’t stop thinking about her and wanted her back. After 7 months of begging, she said told me I can take her out providing I pay her £225 for her beauty treatment. Gave her the money and she blew out on purpose, telling me she never had any intention of meeting me or giving me another chance.
After being hurt so bad, I decided to retire from women completely until I’ve finished working on myself. Women are very dangerous and manipulative
Ouch I'm so sorry to hear this happened to you. I think it's a good choice to do your own inner work. Not all women are manipulative and dangerous though. There are good respectful women out there. But we attract anything that mirrors to us our own shadows, so own that for yourself, so you can work on these parts of yourself and heal. You'll see that you will most likely attract other women in your life, women that will not treat you bad. I wish that for you.
@@RatnaDewiWithin My Hospital consultant told me I’d have to find an understanding woman who would tolerate my misfortunes and that’s going to be a very tough task. That was when I was 35. Now I’m 43, I feel the boat has sailed, especially after the Jennifer experience, which was mostly my fault for being a low value man. I wasn’t expecting to attract a beautiful woman like her but women have a great sense of smell and she knew I was weak, but didn’t realise I was hard work.
Man you have to be awake and learn the truth by know the power of the red pilled man. You need to convert your self in a real man, an alpha man with balls of steel. Find videos to learn the power of the red pill you need it.
With all due respect this is beyond being weak.
Downright stupid to be frank.
I hope you have learnt your lesson.
I sure have.
My ex was a highly educated woman and I was just your average guy back then.
Things didn't work out as she kept crossing my boundaries with disrespect.
She was begging me for 3 months to take her back.
Once I leave there is no turning back.
Make
@@mrmysterious6006 I do agree with you about being beyond weak, which was why I retired from women completely.
When your like me, women will only use and abuse me. It’s not worth it.
I’ve realised from this experience that it takes time to heal a broken heart and that heart can be easily broken again. If you feel your not good enough, walk away and allow another woman/man to take over.
The reason why I wanted to see her was to find out why she refused to end it when I asked her to? Why was she possessive when she never liked me in the first place? Why accuse me of pursuing her when it was her that didn’t let go of me? Why ask me to give her chance at valentines after she hit me and verbally abused me for 3 hours?
Nothing made sense
Valentines incident was my fault because I asked her to be my woman and then told her to find someone else that would suit her needs as I didn’t feel I was going to be good enough for her.
I didn’t know how to be affectionate and tried to copy what the opposite couple were doing, but she humiliated me. This was when the overthinking began.
I have a completely different view about this: if a woman values and respects herself to begin with she doesn't need to play these games. She acts with honor and integrity. She has no need to manipulate, lie or cheat. She knows her worth.
Absolutely true!!!! A woman who needs to be constantly reminded (boundaries) that she should respect you and treat you well is just like a person who wants to rob a home but does not have the courage to break the lock. As soon as the opportunity comes they will sneak and and rob the people/place. There is a saying that if a lock is the only thing that keeps you honest you really were never honest in the first place. You are a thief in waiting. So it is with women. Conditional character is not character. Conditional ethics are not ethics, Conditional empathy is not empathy. Conditional basic respect to treat others as you would have them treat you is not respect. Conditional kindness is not kindness. Conditional morals are not morals.
This is true and have known this for the last 2 years after having dated more than a few bad apples. However it is virtually impossible to meet a woman nowadays who doesn't do at least one of these things sometimes
Your looking in the wrong places.
@@MagoCelta Where should he look then?
@@niallg3551 not at -church, work, gym, bars/clubs, school, online dating apps- . I think all of those have been eliminated. What's left? Who knows?
By design, I think.
If she’s breathing she’s lying
😂
They hold their breath and tell lies too
Hahahah😂
Yesssssss
This is the truest statement on the internet. Period. If a woman is speaking. She’s lying. He’ll. They lie in their sleep
I totally agree with you, Sadia, and can confirm all the points, having experienced them myself.
Thank you for this insight.
Omitting key details is lying, this is something I can't tolerate. When it comes to those behaviours that are contrary to the kind of person she is, I can agree that we tend to ignore things until they become too much.
How to know she's lying: Her mouth moves
You make it so clear in such calmness that it hurts me :) Thank you!