Why I gave my teenage daughter a vibrator--and you should too | Dr. Robin Buckley | TEDxPortsmouth
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 19 มิ.ย. 2024
- Sexual pleasure for girls, young women and adult women is more than what it seems. It’s about connecting women from early ages and into their adulthood to who they are physically, mentally, and psychologically. Being comfortable with their sexual pleasure can help young women connect with their identities and embrace ownership of themselves. Ultimately by connecting to their sexual pleasure, women of all ages find their voices, and equalize the playing field in all areas of their lives, from the bedroom to the boardroom. With her PhD in clinical psychology, Dr. Buckley is able to break down the misconceptions to have this frank conversation regarding girls’ sexual pleasure.
Dr. Robin Buckley is an executive coach and couples coach who helps individuals and couples thrive in their careers and relationships. The owner of Insights Group Psychological & Coaching Services in Rye, NH, Dr. Buckley has a doctorate in clinical psychology and served as a doctoral professor and dissertation chair for students in business, leadership, education, and healthcare. She has published two books, including Voices from the Village: Advice for Girls on the Verge of Adulthood, and is a columnist for Entrepreneur. Robin is mom to four children and lives in Berwick, ME with her husband and two German shepherds. This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at www.ted.com/tedx
"why are we comfortable talking about female pain, but not the female pleasure" wow
Cheers 🥂🍾..... You got community 😊
Accurate! Answer: Because the older generations and MANY men are more comfortable with us behaving like a kitten in the kitchen, but a tigress in the bedroom! They want the unrealistic expectation, not the reality of what is.
@@r.katiekane252 so true!
@Yummy Spaghetti Noodles - Touching YOUR OWN body isn't lacking self-respect. Its a matter of self care.
@Yummy Spaghetti Noodles you saying men don’t touch themselves?
I wish my mom would see this.
yeah these womeen be desperate to destroy their box at such a young age
@@marcuswilliams7512 box? If your talking about toys they don't destroy your parts.
Yeah, yoseph? Sounds like you're not girl. And don't tell titan that he'll "understand when he's older" because you only post anime. He clearly understands well enough to be watching this video
@@marcuswilliams7512you're not only wrong but your IQ matches that of an 8 year old.
@@marcuswilliams7512using your body is not destroying your body you weirdo
Only people who didn't come from Tiktok are worthy of liking this 🏆
Looking for worthiness outside of oneself is folly
@@r.katiekane252 this is worthy of liking
Actually gasped when I saw this on my feed, am subscribed to Ted talk
this was on tiktok?
Yessssirrrr
Bravo for this tedtalk!
When I saw the title my first reaction was WTF
As soon as I saw the title, I just came for the comments. 🍿🍿🍿
Yes
I got shocked by the title and thought it would be a nonsense talk, but she is absolutely right on EVERYTHING! Loads of love and respect for this woman!
Naaaah... but aye your pic lets us know you're not worth listening to either lol
appreciate your reply!
@@joeblow5658 lmao
💀💀💀
@@joeblow5658if you have a contradicting point you’re welcome to debate. Random attacks against people is completely unhelpful and not good for a conversation
I wish I had heard this talk when I was a teenage girl!
As a teenage girl I can’t say, this helped me understand a little bit more and feel less shameful abt it
So happy you spoke about this! I’ve been having conversations with my daughter from the time she was 5 and was able to open up the dialogue and trust on the subject. She’s now 17 and we talk about everything under the sun without guilt or embarrassment whatsoever.
Good job mom!
What's the point of it? What happened to privacy?
Okay, I'm sorry, I sounded rude. But, I'm really having a tough time understanding the practicality of it. Do you just want to be as close to your kids as possible or is there a bigger benefit for your kid here?
@@dark_energy68 I'm not sure if she gives free space for her children,but it's good for parents to let their children have privacy
@@dark_energy68The point for me is, you want your children to feel comfortable talking to you about anything. My oldest son is 20. We can talk about anything and he's not afraid to come and ask me. I think thats bc we've always been open with each other from a young age and I've made it a point to not overreact when he comes to me with bad he's done. Of course there's privacy. He's not forced to share anything he doesn't want to.
I don't want to achieve the second goal at the age of 65; your whole talk is so empowering & that you don't have to serve & act or rely upon someone else for your own pleasure. Be ashamed of...
👏 👏 👏
I’m here for the comments. Like this up after you drop yours! 🤭
2:41 *TEDx PRODUCT PLACEMENT?*
Who came here from the boyscast?
yes 😂
this is such an important topic to discuss! empowerment is stronger than shame :)
Thats really true start doing it you know whats gonna happen
Welcome to our Brave New World.
Amusing Ourselves to Death
“Right to pleasure” seems like a line straight from the book
Yeah not like the great old days, when we had slaves, and women were property.
@@haonyoass9556 What about the other books that said women came from a rib?
I want to send this to my mom but I don't want to get in trouble!
Sameee
Show your mom and say a friend sent it to you and what she thinks
@@kahlernygard809 big brain thank you so much
I came just to read the comments
I have to admit，before I start watching, I was very skeptical, but after watching i feel such warmth inside me. great message for all women.
Well said!
Why r y'all being sensitive abt it in some comments??
Because we don't understand the point of doing stuff like that. Me included. Please help me here.
@@dark_energy68 bot
Nobody is ashamed about vibrators. Every other add on Instagram is an add for one and they are sold at rite-aid. Your just weird dude.
Idk how I feel about this one. This could be a slippery slope sort of situation and the girl is 13 too. Maybe if she was 16 instead
Pun intended?
Exactly
Really
@DARK Energy sounds exactly like the description, troll also comes to mind.
I don't understand your intentions questioning many on theyre personal choices or opinions on the subject and as a result I suggest people be wary in responding to this individual.
Cheaper than paying Child $upport for that month too!
ayoo important conversation time!
these headlines are geting out of hands damn lmao
love that! wish my parents had thought that way
She even said the little girl broke the damn thing and needed a new one.. i’m really really torn about this one. on one hand i get the “support” but everything about this tells me she’s WAY too young. the mom and daughter dynamic doesn’t bother me. it’s simply the age. 13 ? 13 and using a vibrator ? man.. idk
Apparently, you have been brainwashed like most of society.
It’s sad that people are sexualizing their children at such a young age - wow
Couldn’t agree more
Give her a broomstick to clean the house!!!!!!!
Seeing all the comments agreeing with this kinda sick behavior put me back in perspective of the times we’re living in
Absolutely. I totally agree
Quite strange and uncomfortable
so true.. own the body
Such a tabu topic presented in such extraordinarily beautiful way ❤️ this TEDtalk deserves to go viral 🥰
Hi, could you please explain the whole concept of the video to me? I really did not understand what the hype is all about and in general just what message is.
@@dark_energy68 - The message is that we should teach our daughters NOT to be ashamed of their bodies or their self-pleasure activities with their OWN bodies.
Groomers gotta groom 🤷
@@joeblow5658 Do you even know what grooming is?
I can think of nothing that should be more taboo then sexualizing your own 13 year old child.
What About Teenage Boys ? Hand Vs Fleshlight ?
Next on ted talk: "why I bought a fleshlight for my son, but didn't give him any lube"
YASSSSS SHE ATE, SHE WAS SPITTING FACTS, PERIODT!
I love life because there exists amazing peoples like her.
Find out why her husband left for good ..........
@@lukespector5550 I think you mean why she left her husband for good.
AMAZING talk! I got emotional many times.
Most people can’t begin to understand this message due to closed mindedness, and simply put, ignorance.
But the good news is that there are MANY of us who get it, and are ready to transform the next generation into empowered, confident and happy girls and women!
Can’t wait to continue watching more and more of our society continue to break free from outdated, limiting and controlling narratives that hurt women (and men)! 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
Watch in 1.5x
Wow ..now Ted talk... nothing have left to talk.....
I'm not against it..
but ..
OK. Mr. NOBODY. 🤦🏻♀️
This is a VERY important conversation to have
😂 exactly. Btw how do I say your name. It looks cool
Poverty is more importent
@@ruhig.mein.Kleiner. I don't recall her saying that one was MORE important than the other.
Help a kid at 13 or 14 addicting po*n is very important yes.
Such candid and powerful talk
What about boys and nofap philosophy ?
It would be interesting discuss that topic as well, although if she claims that these type of experiences are important to know our bodies, i think it also applies with male
We are not talking about giving viagra to teenage boys.
@@lemon9974 lmao hey numbskull.. she actually used that exact example @ 1:20 💀 what an id10t hahaha
To be fair, I doubt there are many teenage boys that need Viagra.
Well you don't really need too lol
But we could buy them a fleshlight! (And should!)
@@lemon9974 The speaker disagrees: 1:21
Give women what they want " INDEPENDENCE " and a 🐈 😻
Informative and very progressive, i wonder if this could happen in India.
@@susheelpanwar4503 Agreed
Way too behind
Longggggg timeeeeeee!!
so true, i wonder!
Well it may have already. Like the one-off occurring being discussed here, I'm positive some households here would have done this discussion. But whether it's a common thing to do here, i don't think that's common even there. Many comments reveal that.
Least crazy tedx talk
What does she consider to be third base?
Wanted a mom like you
Yeah, me too. Would have loved to talk of the loads I take out in my spare time with my mom - or dad!
Ok….weird side of TH-cam again.
If you truly care about protecting children from paedophiles, inform them enough not to make those predators the only people able to talk to
What an incredibly valuable talk. Please let that clickbaity title draw you in to the reality of our daughters livrs
I cannot be the only one to take a double take, thinking that the person in the thumbnail was Weird Al
Im almost sure yt is completely full of weird bots, i mean theres a comment talking about how shes been teaching her daughter about pleasing herself since 5 years of age.
Theres just no way, no way theres this many mothers who are sexualising their children
I'm dismayed myself!
Yessssss!!!! I am here for it 🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽
What About Teenage Boys ?
Fleshlight Is ghe way to go (sarcasme)
Feel free to create your own TED talk for them. This talk wasn't about boys...as not ALL talks are.
@@r.katiekane252 Men aren't really wasting their time creating bs videos under the name of TEDX
Edited okay lol but I think one point is that girls tend to explore less and are more confused about what to do. It's nothing against guys, of course everyone should be safe and learn about their bodies, but there is clearly a gap in general understanding and action. There is probably also differing levels of difficultly and time to reach orgasm.
@@elitecoder955 - Nobody is going to force them to either. However, just bc men aren't...doesn't mean women aren't. We don't need permission, and we aren't asking for it. If you don't like the content, scroll on.
I see the incels and the pearl clutchers are out in force
What did you think that massage gun was for?
Ayo wtf
Eye-opening!
I don't even have children but this title.... wowzers got my attention lol🤔😵
I dont have kids either but I think we both will find a mate to have fun with
Thank you.
So for Women is it all about orgasm?
Preaaacccchhhh!!! You know I wasn’t sure where I stood based off the title but after hearing her piece- I’m in. Education is key.
Some of these comments don’t pass the vibe check smh
Why was this recommended to me
I got pleasure to listen to this speech. It means for me that it's unattainable goal for me because I haven't a such conversation with my mum.. Buy I will do my best in the future to help my kids! 😁
Sometimes in securing our future, we heal from our past. May your future be brighter!
Soiuz Rushimii, so , loose it
Good
Nice 👍🏽....More awareness on this...
That title though.
If your child uses the internet, they new at age 8
Very true. Enpower,ent instead of boys!
Programming
Portsmouth New Hampshire?
I’m not sure. I’ve been to Portsmouth NH before though. It’s a really nice town.
@@videogameplayer0552 yeh I was just through there this morning and I checked my phone as I was leaving and this notification was present lol.
@@heads_together_crypto2422 Are you from New Hampshire? I’m from Massachusetts.
@@videogameplayer0552 no I'm not. Just a long distance truck driver.
@@heads_together_crypto2422 Cool!
Now we're Ted Talking!
Giving the proper information is one thing, but the vibrator? I don’t feel like it was necessary
This is incredible.
and then everyone clapped
Weird mom flex but ok
I love this so much. Thank you Robin! I created my TH-cam channel to empower my daughter. To let her see me working as an attorney in Hollywood to show her that not everything is perfect as it seems on social media. Letting her know that it’s okay to work and really powerful as a woman. Thank you for bringing this conversation to the forefront.
영상감사합니다ㆍ솜결
Always the same comment from me
this was a great channel
My child is nearing that age, and to be honest we're clueless on how to convey this topic with her. I will not be buying her a v1brat0r, but the rest of this woman's info is pretty useful.
You're already a better mother then her
@@joeblow5658 *than
@@joeblow5658this doctor knows more than you ever will.
That was brilliant.
Bravo!!!
Thats cringey and ridiculous. You dont need to assist your daughter to explore this. She should be able to build her selfesteem seperate to what society does or doesnt do.
How about teaching control of self?
Wtf
Vibrators are about to be sold out 😅
Wtf
Bruh
Mmh
I agree..👍
can someone TLDR this?
Man I’m trynna be in that crib
Besides all the pearl clutching and religious thumping in the comments... The part about the 65 year old woman that never had an orgasm in her life. Audience laughing. I found that so sad... A woman that never had an orgasm in her life and people laughing...
That's why all the outraged comments here. Some of you can't wrap your mind that women have a right to pleasure in their life. And also choice on how they get that.
Men who died virgins: *yea*
I wish the 65 had a man to use vibrator and please her the right way.
the conversation is about a 13 year old child
I’m comfortable talking about it. 🤪
that's weird
These people are nuts just what we need more confident 13 yr olds..I have had 3 Jesus Christ
Quelle décadence….. pauvre fille….
C'est vrai!
This is spot on!
G-spot on!