Sexual fantasies as a portal to self-acceptance and inner freedom | Lucia Cordeiro Drever | TEDxCU

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 3 ส.ค. 2022
  • Sex is hard to talk about and seen as an inappropriate topic of conversation in many settings. But eroticism is a core ingredient of being human. Repression creates shame and suffering. Lucia shares her findings as a couples therapist and sex researcher in how acknowledging our sexual fantasies can be a doorway into self-acceptance, understanding ourselves deeper and experiencing more inner freedom.
    Lucia Cordeiro Drever is a psychotherapist working primarily with couples and psychedelic-assisted therapy in Longmont, CO. She is also pursuing a PhD in Clinical Sexology. Lucia's work with couples mainly involves helping partners understand one another and take responsibility in order to find a safe and fulfilling partnership. Her work with psychedelics helps people access deep parts of themselves that were previously unavailable. She is originally from Brazil and loves spending time with her husband, children, family and friends in tropical places eating delicious fruit. This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at www.ted.com/tedx

ความคิดเห็น • 137

  • @mingcheng_hsieh
    @mingcheng_hsieh ปีที่แล้ว +7

    it's quite true that we people tend to think the negative solutions first than the positive ones when facing the crisis, we may try to walk around to see different scenery and have a good mood.

  • @pixie1136
    @pixie1136 ปีที่แล้ว +55

    I think this could also apply to other parts of ourselves such as the less seen things (negative emotion) we have. Being truthful to yourself will make it a lot easier to live. Denying that we are angry about a wronging done to us or someone we love, not acknowledging that we are sad or heartbroken about something, pushing whatever we really want for ourselves in life to the back of our head because we’re scared of failure or afraid to break out of our comfort box- this all ties in together. Refusing to accept yourself, ALL of yourself will keep you chained down. Living life to the fullest (whatever it is in your opinion) will come when you choose to acknowledge all parts of you.
    This is all in my opinion and take from what they said. Maybe they didn’t mean it like that but it’s what I got from the video.

    • @deborahdean8867
      @deborahdean8867 ปีที่แล้ว

      I don't think that was what she was talking about at all . It's clear what she was talking about and it's fine if you want sn intimate relationship with your own ego. But it was a great self relocation about what is on your mind!

    • @pixie1136
      @pixie1136 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@deborahdean8867 I don’t think you understood what I said either. It’s not about having an “intimate relationship with your own ego” it’s about understanding yourself. Knowing who you are and how you feel very frequently even helps people manage their anger, their actions, and how they articulate themselves. I also don’t appreciate those little jabs at me you tried to take but keep it cute and have yourself a day you deserve.

  • @njannuzzi
    @njannuzzi ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Brilliant and eye opening! Congrats!!

  • @sharayutravels
    @sharayutravels ปีที่แล้ว +28

    Honestly this lady brings up topics which occupy minds of everyone. She is also right, it should spoken as topic and not to be made a taboo or otherwise have crazy extreme reactions to such talks.

  • @irfanmehrazulhoque804
    @irfanmehrazulhoque804 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thank you 💐

  • @dylanbuchman8128
    @dylanbuchman8128 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    That last segment was great 👌

  • @Ablecore
    @Ablecore ปีที่แล้ว +6

    “From the fear to awe”
    A path to our purest self we left behind long ago
    “I ask you to remember again, Tough work!”
    Nancy Friday (Bernard)

  • @dittagecoeco2738
    @dittagecoeco2738 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    This talk Is a true gem! Rare topic, precise, thoughtful, documented, funny and useful too!!

  • @princeyadav_7573
    @princeyadav_7573 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I really learn something this channel

  • @sunnyskytarot
    @sunnyskytarot ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Well I think she's brilliant

  • @smallfootprint2961
    @smallfootprint2961 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Good talk. Love the accent.

  • @abrirlaimagen8949
    @abrirlaimagen8949 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    Loved this talk, so inspiring, thank you Lucia, you rock!!!

  • @c.l.bailey4256
    @c.l.bailey4256 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    This was amazing! Thank you! ❤❤❤🌈

  • @annamaegold
    @annamaegold ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Thank you. 🕊

  • @crystalc8254
    @crystalc8254 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    I really enjoyed this talk. Really gave me somethings to think about

  • @alteredillusions100
    @alteredillusions100 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Very good points,

  • @mihaelaclaudiap..2
    @mihaelaclaudiap..2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    I only live with fantasies lately (2 years), I wish I could live with the real deal sometimes ha,ha!

    • @TrashHere
      @TrashHere 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Um… give a shout :)

  • @seididumol837
    @seididumol837 ปีที่แล้ว

    Surely,..nice

  • @dementus420
    @dementus420 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I'm also ashamed of my eroticism.

  • @managementstudy7203
    @managementstudy7203 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    This is naturally but not comfortable to talk in society, I thik we can talk on this topic,,and thank you for giving your openion 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏❤️❤️❤️

  • @jagadeeshkumar5251
    @jagadeeshkumar5251 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    GOOD VIDEO

  • @mianti69
    @mianti69 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    Lust, on the other hand, celebrates self-indulgence. Love comes with open hands and open heart; lust comes with only an open appetite.

    • @BigHenFor
      @BigHenFor ปีที่แล้ว +7

      They come from the same place. Respect, and make friends with your demons. Ignore them, and they'll destroy you out of frustration. Understand them and maintain your boundaries, and you'll never be alone again.

    • @coffeeseven
      @coffeeseven ปีที่แล้ว

      @@BigHenFor very well said.

    • @coffeeseven
      @coffeeseven ปีที่แล้ว

      @Shadow69 You say lust and self indulgence like they're bad things. It's part of life. Healthy emotions shouldn't exclude them or you'll wind up feeling guilty all the time.

    • @mianti69
      @mianti69 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@coffeeseven so, you are repressing priorities over instant gratification without even looking for red flag in the way!!?? 😂😂
      You'll end up in very deep waters my friend...each and every time

    • @coffeeseven
      @coffeeseven ปีที่แล้ว

      @@mianti69 I'm a good swimmer. Sometimes I float. Have a great day.

  • @ilhamshebani7482
    @ilhamshebani7482 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    Interesting 🤔

  • @dark_red_blood
    @dark_red_blood ปีที่แล้ว +10

    The wolf you feed wins, if you want to feed 'want' then that's on you, like smoking cigarettes, whenever I smoke I crave more and more and never get full.

  • @Kami-mk7tu
    @Kami-mk7tu ปีที่แล้ว

    The comments luckily aren't too bad

  • @banksta654
    @banksta654 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    Real eyes realize real lies

  • @gamer9720
    @gamer9720 ปีที่แล้ว +61

    I'm sure the comments on this one are gonna be awful LOL

    • @cocofingerfamilysong
      @cocofingerfamilysong ปีที่แล้ว

      lol

    • @ManyHeavens42
      @ManyHeavens42 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Wrong baby

    • @celozzip
      @celozzip ปีที่แล้ว +7

      you mean they'll disagree with your opinion?

    • @laurabustos6560
      @laurabustos6560 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      It certainly doesn't seem risque so far... Mostly ppl saying this is exactly what's wrong w "woke" Americans.

    • @dementus420
      @dementus420 ปีที่แล้ว

      Should be a goldmine.

  • @siddhantjadiya3757
    @siddhantjadiya3757 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    This was great knowledge about human psyche and yes i also want to try different fantasies in my mind but waiting for that someone.

  • @mart7615
    @mart7615 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    😱😱😱😱 God help us!!

  • @tomconcitis9322
    @tomconcitis9322 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    Fantasies originate in learned experiences from art, entertainment, readings and videos, and story telling.
    Sounds like therapists also are sources to fantasies

  • @theavengers.
    @theavengers. ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Nice another Ted talk

  • @user-hf4eh2ts3q
    @user-hf4eh2ts3q ปีที่แล้ว +2

    These people are like "Hedonism Bot " on Futurama.

  • @flexa41
    @flexa41 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Some fantasies are best left being a fantasy.

  • @user-op7ic5cy7q
    @user-op7ic5cy7q ปีที่แล้ว +4

    ~ interesting topic to talk about .. 👌🙂
    that's the nature of us .

  • @vikinginspace4881
    @vikinginspace4881 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    TED talks how really become low frequency now

  • @silviat8759
    @silviat8759 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    What is her accent? Scottish? I like it...🥰

    • @fullup91
      @fullup91 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Not Scottish. It's American-ish but she's not native.

    • @silviat8759
      @silviat8759 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@fullup91 thanks 😇

  • @anubhavforall
    @anubhavforall ปีที่แล้ว +13

    I have experienced this and I affirm this is very very true!

    • @cocofingerfamilysong
      @cocofingerfamilysong ปีที่แล้ว

      yeh

    • @Ablecore
      @Ablecore ปีที่แล้ว

      Yes it’s a path to our purest self that we left behind

    • @deborahdean8867
      @deborahdean8867 ปีที่แล้ว

      Are you married now? Are you loved more than anything by your devoted spouse? How long have you been married?

  • @andrewfetterolf7042
    @andrewfetterolf7042 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    CU boulder is full of disagreeable people

  • @dennyduane
    @dennyduane ปีที่แล้ว +7

    "They get really excited for me." 😂

  • @suyashishan1960
    @suyashishan1960 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Shortest 14 min video I ever watched

  • @themcgeefamily7514
    @themcgeefamily7514 ปีที่แล้ว

    💚💙

  • @lunaticplantlover
    @lunaticplantlover ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thank you Lucia, this was really helpful and much much needed. 🧡

  • @CodeNameSlicerYT
    @CodeNameSlicerYT ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Taboo and important.
    Just interesting.

  • @swarleystinson6733
    @swarleystinson6733 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    *But how to do it? You didn't tell us that!.*

  • @CalemSmith
    @CalemSmith ปีที่แล้ว +1

  • @celozzip
    @celozzip ปีที่แล้ว +10

    when all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail.

  • @puneetrana575
    @puneetrana575 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    ⚡️⚡️⚡️

  • @Hummingbird25
    @Hummingbird25 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    This presenter is very well spoken and funny

  • @lauriewolomor7435
    @lauriewolomor7435 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    very good speech

  • @rayau6443
    @rayau6443 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Tedu talks

  • @macavelli8905
    @macavelli8905 ปีที่แล้ว

    Very good video

  • @davidryan7386
    @davidryan7386 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    this is completely wrong. your true self is an integration of body, heart and mind with your spirit. not a fantasy trip.

    • @davidryan7386
      @davidryan7386 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      and yes, I have tried this tack, it leads to dispersion and decadence.

    • @onefishtwofish2771
      @onefishtwofish2771 ปีที่แล้ว

      It's the lowest low but since it gives momentary jolts, most assume it to be the highest high.

  • @ManyHeavens42
    @ManyHeavens42 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I make earthquakes everyday

  • @aayushkumar9355
    @aayushkumar9355 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Tbh, this is useless in real life.

  • @BarrySilbert57
    @BarrySilbert57 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    *Now with the recent economy, To get Financial FREEDOM you have to be making money while you're asleep.*

    • @ronaldsmenendez196
      @ronaldsmenendez196 ปีที่แล้ว

      Same here, there’s no doubt investment is the key to future wealth, with my current profit of $59,000 made from my investment with Mr Shelton Morrison I’m totally convinced, he is the best trading broker I have worked with and his strategies are so easy to adapt.

    • @jessicafranco1573
      @jessicafranco1573 ปีที่แล้ว

      @Grady Noble Have also been trading under his guidance.. The profits are secured and over a high percent returns.

    • @ronaldsmenendez196
      @ronaldsmenendez196 ปีที่แล้ว

      *His availability is on what's apk👇*

    • @ronaldsmenendez196
      @ronaldsmenendez196 ปีที่แล้ว

      ນີ້າທີ່ນີ້ລ ♰❶❸❶⓿❾⓿❹⓿❶⓿❽🇺🇲 າທີ່ນີ້ລນີ້

    • @bobbyedwards9096
      @bobbyedwards9096 ปีที่แล้ว

      Take it from one who has it and buy a house in Missouri and dream Wrangler with forex trade profits. I started with Mr Shelton Morrison of financial education and he has been my handler and guider for the past years .

  • @Qwerty8
    @Qwerty8 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Well, how to solve fear: stop going to churches 🤷

  • @simpdown1404
    @simpdown1404 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    This talk deserves an acoustic accompaniment of Cardi B. and Meg Thee Stallion’s WAP 😂😂😂😂😂😂

  • @mikepcs7
    @mikepcs7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Is she time travelling from future😂👍

    • @Ablecore
      @Ablecore ปีที่แล้ว

      To connect us to our pure self from the past

  • @Mir_Aakib
    @Mir_Aakib ปีที่แล้ว +5

    It's sad that i couldn't fantasize about you Lucia. otherwise you've proven your point.

  • @hmahmud34792
    @hmahmud34792 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    RIP ted talks

  • @veganchiefwarrior6444
    @veganchiefwarrior6444 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    too funny

  • @veganchiefwarrior6444
    @veganchiefwarrior6444 ปีที่แล้ว

    that off tone on the end of her words is expressing the wrong emotion.. thats like an irish scottish complaining to your son about something he just wont stop doing tone lol

  • @ZPositive
    @ZPositive ปีที่แล้ว +3

    There's a word that begins with gr and ends in oomer.

    • @ZPositive
      @ZPositive ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@Dimitris_Balf no it doesn't. Happily married man over here. But I must've hit the mark if I triggered you that much.

  • @hmahmud34792
    @hmahmud34792 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Men!?🤨

  • @lohht7g
    @lohht7g ปีที่แล้ว +2

    🤢🤮🤮

  • @weme11
    @weme11 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    What a nonsense. Nothing important to learn from here. Only diversion to escape the reality.

  • @jonathanmachjacksontrad5704
    @jonathanmachjacksontrad5704 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I fantasize about her getting a haircut

  • @GlennSteffy
    @GlennSteffy ปีที่แล้ว +4

    What a pile of bs. Where are the solid videos???

  • @kaelightupthedark
    @kaelightupthedark ปีที่แล้ว +6

    filth.

  • @onefishtwofish2771
    @onefishtwofish2771 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    "survey says" really?
    All I am wondering is why she picked that outfit.

  • @hmahmud34792
    @hmahmud34792 ปีที่แล้ว

    Murica🤣🙏

  • @noclopeclub
    @noclopeclub ปีที่แล้ว +8

    Jesus can change your life ❤️✝️

    • @AHHHyleen
      @AHHHyleen ปีที่แล้ว +3

      🤣

    • @macedonian4life536
      @macedonian4life536 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Ahhh yes 🤝🤝the religious enthusiast, well Jesus.... and knowledge of virtually and literally everything else. We need to consume information constantly so this vid isn't all too bad. But ultimately I'd agree with religion

    • @Iam-qp4md
      @Iam-qp4md 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      He also could've stopped child abuse but we won't go there..

    • @noclopeclub
      @noclopeclub 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@Iam-qp4md Human need God to stop child abuse, we are 100% agree, but people leave without God...

    • @DaRyteJuan
      @DaRyteJuan 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Not necessarily for the better though.

  • @dinni2007
    @dinni2007 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Общие фразы, стандартные клише и ничего конкретного, какие-то жалкие потуги на оригинальность.... В 21 веке никого секс-фантазиями не удивишь, в общем - потратила время зря на эту билиберду... 👿👿👿

  • @gavinhelgeson2880
    @gavinhelgeson2880 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    Groomers…take notes.

  • @arinzechukwuamanekwe9104
    @arinzechukwuamanekwe9104 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    This lady is just crazy lol!

  • @gavinhelgeson2880
    @gavinhelgeson2880 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    Cringe

  • @azaraliyev2064
    @azaraliyev2064 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I thought she is a guy)

  • @hmahmud34792
    @hmahmud34792 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Women☕

  • @leviefrauim1425
    @leviefrauim1425 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    These two points- "psychedelic-assisted therapy" and "pursuing a PhD in Clinical Sexology"- tells me all I need to know about this speaker and her topic. Clearly, another lefty loon, especially if she's willing to have her small child talk w/her about it. .

  • @gottaluvpink89
    @gottaluvpink89 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    …I’ll go ahead and unsubscribe 🥴

  • @uf1978
    @uf1978 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    Your wardrobe selection needs some work, just sayin.

    • @beththompson5845
      @beththompson5845 ปีที่แล้ว

      I'd worry about yourself instead of a whole other individual's preference and choice in clothing.
      You probably weren't comfortable or in agreeance with the topic... And instead of scrolling to the next thing...or speaking what you really feel (which would be 100% valid).. you take a dig
      at her.
      Small one.
      Which speaks volumes on the digger.
      [I'm sorry but your validation is denied. Due to insufficient funds in your account.]
      "Dishonor on you. Dishonor on your cow!"

  • @jaygee5344
    @jaygee5344 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    This is what's wrong with America in it's current "woke" state.

  • @hmahmud34792
    @hmahmud34792 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Women hahahahahaha☕☕☕

  • @Freetheworldnow
    @Freetheworldnow ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Take a Bible and start reading. You will have better success at it!

  • @hmahmud34792
    @hmahmud34792 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Women☕

  • @hmahmud34792
    @hmahmud34792 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Women☕