Why Are Relationships So Difficult?

Why Our Relationships with Others Can Be So Difficult
An issue which troubles many people who come from narcissistic families is that they struggle in their relationships with others - this can be with work colleagues, school or university colleagues, friends, acquaintances, family members and romantic interests/partners. The struggle is in the inability for many to feel close or safe with others and that inability is there for many reasons.
Some people struggle to have any close relationships, some have a couple of people to whom they are reasonably or very close, and others have many people around them and these relationships may be superficial, or they may be closer. Many may feel isolated or alone even with people around them.
A person’s capacity to feel close to others will vary. Some may find that they can feel close to others and others may find themselves feeling more numb towards others and might know that they like a person, but it may be more intellectual than emotional. Others may find that relationships of any kind feel nerve-wracking, or even terrifying, and they may try to avoid them as much as possible.
Why does this happen?
02.26 Attachment Styles
03.44 Complex PTSD
05.38 Isolation and Loneliness
07.30 I am Boring
08.22 Feeling Like an Outsider - I am Odd, Weird or Strange
09.57 Relationships Can Feel Exhausting
11.10 Relationships Can Feel Transactional
11.58 Trust Issues
12.54 Fears of Abandonment and Rejection
13.40 Conflicts in relationships
14.33 Eye Contact
16.28 Emotional Dysregulation
18.05 Overexplaining, Oversharing, Undersharing - Rigid and Porous Boundaries
22.21 Shame
23.07 Projection
23.42 Body Dysmorphic Disorder
24.47 Substance Misuse
25.54 The Inability to Feel Joy
29.03 Interviews from Healing the Traumatized Self
37.35 Romantic Relationships - A Romance Between Two Adapted Selves
41.55 Lack of Social Skills
42.32 Resolving the Issue of Connecting With Others
Article on my website:
childrenofnarc...
The Real Self and The Adapted Self on TH-cam:
• How Do We Say No When ...
Avoidance as a Defence Mechanism on TH-cam
• Avoidance as a Defence...
Attachment Theory
childrenofnarc...
Shame
childrenofnarc...
International Trauma Questionnaire
childrenofnarc...
International Trauma Questionnaire in many languages
www.traumameas...

[@childrenofnarcissists]

02.26 Attachment Styles
03.44 Complex PTSD
05.38 Isolation and Loneliness
07.30 I am Boring
08.22 Feeling Like an Outsider - I am Odd, Weird or Strange
09.57 Relationships Can Feel Exhausting
11.10 Relationships Can Feel Transactional
11.58 Trust Issues
12.54 Fears of Abandonment and Rejection
13.40 Conflicts in relationships
14.33 Eye Contact
16.28 Emotional Dysregulation
18.05 Overexplaining, Oversharing, Undersharing - Rigid and Porous Boundaries
22.21 Shame
23.07 Projection
23.42 Body Dysmorphic Disorder
24.47 Substance Misuse
25.54 The Inability to Feel Joy
29.03 Interviews from Healing the Traumatized Self
37.35 Romantic Relationships - A Romance Between Two Adapted Selves
41.55 Lack of Social Skills
42.32 Resolving the Issue of Connecting With Others

[@quitebright8799]

Dear Sarah, thank you for putting together your series of articles and videos. It means a lot to me that you record a video to go with your articles because the CPTSD can make it hard for a person to sit and read an article. It's much easier to focus on your voice in your recordings. Some of the points that really stood out to me in this video were: your explanation of the origins of feeling one is a boring person and your discussion of relationships between two people acting out of their adapted rather than real selves. Thanks again for your videos. They mean more than you may be aware.

[@childrenofnarcissists]

Hi quitebright,
Thank you so much for your lovely comment - it means a lot.

[@Theowlhawk]

Thank you ❤very insightful videos.

[@barlowwe]

Thank you for this video. I’ve been going through many of your videos and I see myself in them. I am recognizing I’m a victim of narcissistic parents but just using this information to move forward positively and change my negative thinking. I’m not going to live with a victim mentality anymore. Also, I love your voice and presentation.

[@childrenofnarcissists]

Thanks. I am glad the info is useful.

[@DENISEASTUNO-ow1qz]

❤Thank you ❤

[@finsterthecat]

I am binge watching your videos. My narcissistic mother passed away last and without going into lengthy details my siblings scapegoated me and no longer speak with me. It has opened my eyes to the denial of my family dynamics and the role I played. I am left with a complete lack of trust in my own thoughts and feelings when it comes to interacting acting with others, setting up boundaries.

[@childrenofnarcissists]

I am glad these videos are useful. The more healing we do the more we come to trust ourselves and setting boundaries starts to come naturally. I wish you all the best.