Social media has made everyone think they have way more opportunities than they realistically do. It’s also created so much more grass is greener syndrome is just sad
Just had the same conversation with my ex. I told her good luck in life and if she changes her mind she has my number. Back to no contact and back to the gym
Mixed signals means he's not interested and is only keeping you around as an option. He has no genuine desire for you. If he did, he would make it clear.
I was in a 9 year relationship and we've recently broken up and my heart hearts so bad... He's texted a few times asking the name of this or that but that's about all.
Make sure you go no contact for longer than the amount of time you begged or chased. If you begged or chased for 2 weeks, then you better stay away for 3 weeks atleast. You seem less crazy this way.
@@Mypineappleprincess good job, keep it up. I'm gonna try to reach out in 30 days from now. Every person is different and I think by 30 days there will be forgiveness.
@Ryancdickinson95 you're going to hurt your chances of truly reconciling the relationship. She isn't attracted to you right now because she doesn't see you as high value. Being a high value man means you stay away. You want her to see you as high value and make her feel like she missed out. That's why no contact is so hard. Please do not reach out to them.
I made a big mistake. He dumped me after 5years of being together. After 8 months of NC, he came back, saying he missed me, loved me, and wanted to be with me. I was too enthusiastic and took him back right away. But after just 3 days, he started acting strange. When I suggested meeting up, he said I was pressuring him. I told him I couldn’t play these games anymore, and he said it would be better for us to break up. Basically, he dumped me again. I’ve never felt so hurt, so lost, and so humiliated… and I still do. I can’t sleep; I’m angry at myself, depressed, and exhausted. Everyone says to focus on myself, go to therapy, do what I love, spend time with family and friends… and I do. But it hasn’t gotten any easier for me. A year has passed, and I still can’t get over it. I didn’t know he could be so cruel, especially when he knew how much I loved him. Now, I don’t cry because of him-it feels like I lost a big part of myself… I lost love
I'm in this situation trust me you're not alone. It's painful and cruel but remember it says more about them than it does about you. Ask yourself is this the kind of man you want to be with? So inconsiderate of your emotions?
@@_Diaryofwealth thank you so much for responding... I am in conflict with myself, I understand everything, but my heart lives its own life... I want to forget everything and not feel anything. I’m just tired…I can’t take it anymore.
It seems like your partner isn’t really considering your emotions or your reactions to their behavior, which is not a good sign for a healthy relationship dynamic. You need someone who is empathetic, emotionally invested, and present, in order to create a sustainable relationship. Otherwise, you may constantly feel bad, stuck in a power dynamic that could harm your self-esteem, leading to depression. That’s why most professionals recommend moving on. In the meantime, you can explore skills, medication, or therapy to help balance your hormone levels, particularly serotonin, dopamine, and oxytocin.
I’m 2 months 3 days of NC, I’m watching clips about it daily but to be honest, I don’t want him back but wanted to pay back once he shows strong evidence that he wants me back then I will feed him with his own medicine! Don’t get me wrong! He hurts me so much! This is a long term relationship of 18 years involving kids!
hey coach lee. i want to say thank you for making those videos, they help me go through the break up. they still didn’t contact me (they broke up with me 1st october) and first 13 days were agony, next was alright, i felt good, like i didn’t care about him, felt strong. But now, yesterday and today i started feeling those emotions coming back, me missing him, being so curious how could’ve he dumped me, i loved him so much.. it’s just.. thank you so much, you bring me hope there is a chance he’ll contact me, i’ve watched numerous videos of yours..
My ex broke up with me October 1st also. I messed up the first week begging, and pleading. If I hadn't have found Chicago Lee's videos I probably would still be chasing her. He's been a real help in understanding certain things. I feel a little better, but now I'm trying to focus on me, and less on her. She ignores me still, and I'm still blocked, but it's affecting me less, and less.
@@damianchildress4439 To simply put, we met on roblox, dated for a year, i wanted to move to Australia for him (ended up loving the country, so im moving anyways) and this summer his mom found my nudes on phone and he got scared. He and his family are religious, so.. he broke up, because “we couldn’t date cuz his mom keeps an eye” then he came back and asked to date anyways, which i said no to because he had no plan. After few weeks i came back to him. Well… After some time, everything was fine, second break up was when his friends bullied him and he got “pressured” (not by them but by his own thoughts) into breaking up with me. I ended up coming back few days later. Now this time. He went to the christian camp, and when came back he said that he chose to stay closer to god and.. we should stay friends. I of course said no and we broke up. He promised he’ll never break up with me over religion.
I believe the no contact while focusing on self improvements has had a major impact. Changing my look also seems to have sparked a major interest when I bumped into my ex. Kept it cordial when she showed interest, but made sure to not to over extend myself which prompted her to reach out less than 24 hours later for the first time in almost 2 months after the breakup.
My ex and her friends and family have been showing increasingly positive signs from casual reach outs, questioning my stories, posting old stuff related to me and our anniversary, and my ex showed up at church looking for someone with her friends one week after she found out I was going But she hasn’t reached out and she reposts negative breakup stuff on TikTok. I don’t understand
My showed up to my brothers company, she used to work there before and started to speak about me to him, at first she was singing my name out loud and then my brother asked her if she was happy with the breakup, she couldn’t answer, instead she began to talk bad about me to him. What could that be ? I’m in nc for 3 months now
So my avoidant ex broke up with me and blindsided me saying she say i should go be with someone else and started saying alot of nasty things to push me away, feeling betrayed and lied to I freaked out and broke alot of her things. She does still love and miss me but she's scared of me. I've taken time to do my research on avoidants and I know that when they start stonewalling it doesn't mean they don't love you. Long story short I had a bad reaction and that's not me and I'll never do that again, I've learned from it and have progressed alot in knowing how to be in a relationship with her and I understand her alot better. I've already told her take her time to heal I will work on myself for our relationship. What should I do? Will she feel like coming back to me if she's no longer scared or did I mess up no contact by saying u heal and I'll work on myself and I'll wait for you? P.s. we were together for a year and she has a kid that isn't mine and we built such a strong bond together, I just messed up bad because I didn't know anything about avoidants and just thought I got played.
Hi Coach...I was in a 7-month relationship, and although I was initially skeptical, he was very sure about us from the start. He even told his parents about me and introduced me to them. However, last month he began questioning me and whether I was the right fit for him. That made me panic, and I started agreeing to everything he said, just to make things work. Then, after an argument 17 days ago, he said, 'Let's give it one last chance,' but the next morning, I called him multiple times-around 10 times-due to something urgent, and since then, he’s gone silent. He hasn't spoken to me since. I cried for two days, begged, and pleaded, but when I didn’t hear back, I stopped contacting him. It’s been 15 days now. I never raised my voice, never said anything hurtful. I was always there for him, understanding his family and supporting him. Do you think he might reconsider this?
Great video coach Lee ! Here is my question for a lot of people who have been in the same situation. If you caused an argument for being overly jealous and said mean things to your partner and verbally disrespected them, yet later apologized but they still choose to leave you even though they love you. Do you still go in to no contact even though it was your fault for being mean and disrespectful.
@@JavierJuarez-m1n If you apologized and said your part, You basically have to let them be. If they forgive you and come back, be better then. But you have to give them time until they are ready.
@@ElevateMyRelationships thank you just to clarify do I still go into no contact after the apology ? She did mention she doesn’t want to completely cut ties.
@@JavierJuarez-m1n Well she did mention she doesn’t want to cut ties, however, as I understand it, you don’t want to be platonic friends so you still have to be true to yourself. It’s good that she accepted your apology, but you still want to clearly communicate that you want her as a romantic interest, and if she doesn’t want that right now, yes be disciplined and continue no contact and tell her to reach out if she ever wants something more. At that point, you have to give her space and respect her, but continue to build yourself and learn all these things. You’ll come out great in the other side if she does come back, or, somebody else comes into your life. Hope this helps. If it does I wouldn’t mind a follow :)
@@JavierJuarez-m1n I personally don't think you need to be so open with your intent for your ex partner. According to Coach Lee, your openness is a form of intimacy and that is something that you should be depriving your partner of during no contact. That being said, you should be true to yourself if you don't want a friendship but want and intimate relationship. According to coach Lee this is why you engage in no contact. The no contact is telling your partner that you are not interested in a friendship relationship. In another video he says not to tell them you aren't interested in more than a friendship but instead to minimize the request and blow it off by just saying something like "sure okay" but then going through with the no contact anyway. I don't know your situation but in mine she said she wanted to be friends and I agreed before finding Coach Lee, but I noticed I was the only one reaching out to her and if I didnt reach out then neither did she. This is why I went to no contact and it actually looks like its working. The missing piece of the puzzle is to work on yourself while in no contact so that when your ex sees you or sees your social media she sees a changed person and she becomes curious. After the no contact and working on improving my physical appearance and mental attitude towards myself and watching videos on how the female mind works as well as making financial and self help improvements, my ex saw me in person because I was asked by her dad to do some work for him and she started texting me like crazy the next day. When I saw her I acted like I had some place to go. I was cordial but showed her she was not the center of my attention. I was worried I made things awkward but all of a sudden after 3 weeks of no contact and a month of self improvement including a new hairstyle and going to the gym, she is suddenly texting like crazy, making jokes and opening up more about her life. I cant say where its headed but it is a complete change from her never reaching out to me and giving me one word responses like she felt forced to communicate.
So you should literally mirror them in all circumstances.. if they're avoidant you go avoidant. If they're giving mixed signals you give mixed signals.. this mirroring should draw you together as equals?
You aren't supposed to be waiting around. You should be making improvements in your life. Physical and mental as well as focusing on your life goals. The changed you in conjunction with no contact will arouse curiosity in your ex. From there you need to take things slow once your ex reaches out so you don't look easily had and destroy the mystery the no contact created.
Just because you think it is good doesn't mean the other person thinks that. The other person either wants something different or better. You don't get to decide that for them.
Mine was hot & cold during the majority of the relationship while pregnant. I'm pretty sure she's a narcissist with a power trip since she ended things again in July. I've been played. It's a one way street.
Narcissist always have one foot out the door. They will always try to exert control and power over all situations and they will always try to have one up on you. If they're in fact a narcissist, stay away from them. Absence and silence is all they deserve
No contact for about 2 weeks for a one year relationship but when we are in person she still laughs and jokes with me like when we were together I have no idea what this means
Are you certain she wasn't also with seeing other men besides you? Some women who are capable of being that casual and nonchalant about a break means there's another man so their comfortable with how things are
@@sloanmagnum5009 I’m not 100% certain but if she is it’s an unusually well kept secret She texted me the night I wrote that comment saying she really misses me, still loves me, still wants me in her life but she needs time to heal from the break up and doesn’t want to get too attached. Made me feel better at first but now I’m even more confused
Am in NC for 9 months now.. however we work in the same company together. He broke up with me saying we were not compatible (my mistake as I was too insecure and immature) but he would always include me in everything and held a celebration for my birthday with customised cake and a nice dinner with the team. He would sometimes ask my colleagues how I’m doing and we would make eye contact whenever he passes by my table. However he is still cold on text and we’re in NC😢 it’s hard to move on especially when we see each other every other day at work, it’s been very confusing and I’m at lost of what to do
I got mixed signals some days ago, we were talking for like 3 hours and all that time she kept repeating "I really miss you, you are in my mind all day" "I miss spending all day with you" "Everything remembers me of you" and I was so happy that I rushed things and asked her if that means she wants to get back togheter, obviously the response was NO and I hate myself for falling into that and having that moment of weakness. We are now back into No Contact and I have her blocked everywhere, but I'm still afraid that she can't stay away and contact me in between this week or so. I don't know what to do now.
My ex giving me mixed signals. She wanted some time apart, and only after four days she text me that she carved some pumpkins and asked if I had any trick-or-treaters come to my house. I'm so confused.
When she asked me to go stay with my brother for a bit and i freaked out and she told me why would i think we would not be back together. ? 😢 im so confused
He was talking with the Air port employee about me he said to him for sit but didn't say to me,he checked my passport and said go to the Airoplane. When he came to the Airoplane I thought this is the another person ,he is not because he sat hiding he should say me direct.
I was lucky as i went into no contact without knowing it was even a thing. I made my mind up to turn my back and be gone. She has continued to contact me over the last 4 months. 3 weeks ago i told her not to text or call me but thursday just gone i had 2 missed calls which i didnt respond to. I think my dumper has got the message, im gone for good
Personally I dont think I could forgive my ex if she was sleeping with someone else then came back. Would make me feel like she is just shopping around and may never settle aside from the disrespect that shows. If I were you I would be slamming every girl in your vicinity and let her know that you are the desirable one that she lost out on.
He left 3 years ago. I was crying for over 1 year. I still hope he comes back but maybe i get just mixed signals. I feel stuck cause i could be with someone else but i only feel love for my ex. Im scared to tell him i have found someone and he is just happy for me...also i feel bad knowing that i cant give love to that new men
Hey Coach Lee, My ex just texted me “Would you give me a chance to make it workout” and he deleted that message like 30 minutes later. What should I do? I have been no contact for 1 month and a half. I am confused. Should I text him or ignore the fact that he tried to reach out.
So, am I doomed? I did nocontact for 2 months. She contacted me with an excuse to give me stuff I forgot. We talked for an hour and had fun. It was light. However, we hugged at the end and I kissed her. She returned it but still, I wish I didn't do that. I just acted too quick I feel. What's your opinion ? Am I doomed? I haven't reached out but it's been three days and I haven't heard from her.
Can you please do a video when your spouse files but you don’t sign right away and want to drag it on and if no contact can still work especially if they moved to a new country (if they are military)
How does it work for someone with a child? Our child turns 2 months old this week. She left exactly a week after he was born. I’ve been doing my own thing, first few weeks we didn’t talk at all. Then conversation started and we talked til early hours of the morning for 3-4 nights and she was joking and bringing up old funny memories. Almost seemed as if nothing happened. But I wanted closure as to why she did it and her answers aggravated me so I’ve cut communication unless it’s about our child. This is the 2nd time she’s left, and I’m to the point I don’t “need” her anymore, but I wouldn’t mind having her because I do love her. During our child exchanges through the week she’s all smiles and try’s making conversation but I keep it short and to the point. The most confusing message she sent me is “right now I don’t want it, but maybe a few months or years we will decide we want to be together”. Makes me want to sit around and wait because I’m loyal, and when I love I love. But at the same time I don’t want to wait around forever..
I think the element of curiosity and mystery is what the no contact creates. Think of ways to be mysterious. make major improvements in your life and don't be so open giving her any details. Im sure there are more ways you can create mystery if you think about it.
I begged the first week, then i try contact 2 weeks later, went to no contact for 1 month. Then i broke it again. Now im in no contact for 1 in half month. Since i mess up for the 3 first months, whats my odds coach?
There is an advantage when you get dumped by a narcissist, once they go they never look back, which is fine by me, 1 year of no contact and I hope it stays like this.
A true narcissist will attempt to establish contact at some point in time. They won't do it because they care or miss you tho. They do to stroke their ego and see if they have control. They would then find away to discard you and leave again. But yes, if they're a real narcissist and they do leave you alone forever, consider your self very lucky
@@sloanmagnum5009exact my ex ghosted me from nowhere few days after I talked about some spiritual stuff God told me since august I broke no contact 2 but I’ve been in no contact for 1,5 months now all he want is control he is a true narcissist he never broke up with me directly I asked him face 2 face in July he said he didn’t want to break up and he is not afraid of me if he wanted that he’ll let me know but disappeared without any notice they’re true psychopath
For me there is something in their head that doesn’t work properly, he is avoidant he hates confrontation prefer to ghost and lie, look like he is 12 in his head thanks God during these last 3 months I’ve work a lot to detach emotionally from him cause he was so toxic I don’t love him anymore my eyes are wide open now
you would have to now do the opposite of eager. Although it's kind of manipulative, it's really the only thing you can do if you're still trying to engage with this person
Hi Coach Lee, i wonder if you can help me with my situation: my 10 year spouse left me 8 months ago, even though she never pushed or even mentioned the divorce for all this time (i think she is just afraid of doing all the paper stuff) she stated very clearly that attraction has gone and she felt that relationship with me was like a death trap. She said that she want nothing from me but friendly conversations. I'm trying to give her a NC, but she text me ALL THE TIME as if nothing happened. I'm also following all your other advices for months like "giving her peace" "small positive interactions" etc and we have a very positive meetings once or two a month but it feels like things are never moving forward and nothing really changes. I think the problem here is might be that she is always have me in touch (as you advised many times before i am not ignoring her texts) and she doesn't really feel the loss. What should i do in a situation like this? I cant ignore her, but at the same time i need her to feel the consequences. Is she just using me as her training wheels? Should i just be patient and keep doing this? Honestly the whole situation has been extremely exhausting for me, this rollercoaster of emotions doesn't stop since she texts me all the time evoking my emotions. I am at the point where i want to just tell her something rude like "don''t talk to me anymore please" since it brings me a lot of pain. Any tips?
I would say be honest and say you don’t want to talk to her as much as you all do. Say it’s not fair to you bc it hurts you and that you wish her well but you don’t want to continue on with how your relationship has been. She will then feel the loss and eventually she will come back but in a more serious way!
Ugh when I hang out with my ex he plays all these songs around me that sounds like he’s regretting our break up and then he’ll do all the flirting with me kissing and everything but then says he don’t want to get back together ugh so over I’m going NC
Coach, I got blocked everywhere a month ago. This past weekend she sent me a friend request on snapchat, to do that she had to think to unblock me. I accepted, but no messages were exchanged (I definitely wasn't gonna message first). I was unfriended and blocked again 2 days after that. What do you make of that?
I bought the emergency break up kit . Ldr, we were supposed to meet in Poland , I asked him to say each other there to say good bye each other there . He refused saying that he doesn’t want to open the wound with a long message . I gracefully back up saying that it’s hard for me to remember how things finished but I wish him peace in his process . 17 days of no contact . I went to Paris instead to see my cousin . When he saw my story there , he published right away this quote : She later edxplained to me that behavior is how we speak the unspeakable . John couldn’t spezk something unspeakable . So he did it A commun friend on instagram saw that , he told me . But I didn’t react because I don’t open his stories . Since then , he increased his posts . Like he’s doing good . Posting and deleting or masking me . He’s on dates apps though . Btw he watches all my stories What do you think coach ?
I was in a relationship for 6 years. She broke up with me. We went no contact for 14 days. She contacted me, and now we are talking daily. She said she is enjoying this but doesn't want any commitment. However, she seems very interested in talking and spending time. What should I do? Please help.
she is friendzoning you. if you want her, don't be her friend. she has to miss you. go no contact. otherwise you help her to get over you. check the other videos from coach lee, maybe even get his emergency break up kit (it brings the most important points in a few videos, so you don't have to go through 1000 videos). you could tell her: "being friends with the ex never worked at never will work. there's only a relationship possible. if you change mind your mind you have my number. i wish you the best". but don't make her feel you will wait for her your whole life. stay focused on your self! become the person you always wanted to become. don't show pain. that's the best chance to win.
2,5-3 months since she broke up with me went in to no contact after 2-3 weeks trying to fix it when I realized I was kinda begging I stopped. After 41 days no contact she texted me with I light convo and that’s she just wanted to see how I am doing replied casual and I didn’t carry the convo. Still waiting on something significant. It has been 4 weeks since then. I might do it myself in 2 weeks because I think she might be afraid or doesn’t know what to do. I know she misses me and that she is sad. Should I call her or would she reach out again?
@@antgwuapo okay but how should I do that I would like to just call her and ask her if she would like to meet up I don’t want to play games I have changed I don’t want to give and get mixed signals
You will end up presenting yourself as a pursuer once more and that's not good for you. If your ex realise his or her mistake she will do anything to get you back. What struck me most from what coach lee said is if you push for it and you get her, you are creating a room for her to do it again. Don't jump the gun. What will be will surely be. Focus on yourself. Your ex is not worth dying for if she can dump you!
I am in the same situation as you. The ex is seeking contact but is not ready for getting back yet. In my case he did reach out 1 time, and it is nearly 1 month i didnt hear something from him. It was just à casual talk without proposing from his side to see each other. I think he is just testing the water, which is an progress for sûre. Otherwise the ex would take the initiative to see each other at least. In my case, i do nothing. I do not reach back and i stay reserved untill the moment he reaches back again to drink or see each other or something. I dont have him back, but im making progress with no contact. And i try to be confortable with it....
@@maja-5727 I think she might be afraid to reach out to me and getting rejected because I have went totally silent which she never thought I could. On the other side it feels like I need to try because she broke up with me because I pushed her a little bit away by neglecting her and I didn’t want to stay there until I have changed myself. It feels like ik nearly there and when I’m ready I want to reach out to have a talk because I know she misses me but she doesn’t want to get hurt again and I need to be sure to be with her again but on a different type of level
learn to let go, it's hard but you are hurting your self. if she wanted you she would let you know, right? but she doesn't, right? go date other people and dont have expectations, focus on your self. love your self. that's how you escape this trap.
My ex keeps going from posting romantic idealisation to then deleting it and then posting it again (video's like "when you find the one who makes you feel special") it's been 2 months of NC now but this behaviour is so wild, she is mature enough to know content like that would hurt me and make her look bad, any reason ex's do this?
She’s hurting and wants to hurt you too. Also, she wants to get your attention. Don’t engage in that kind of behavior. If she ever reflects on her actions, she might feel embarrassed later on. Unfortunately, if she doesn’t, then it might be a blessing that you broke up. She has to heal her own wounds first. She’ll never be able to give you her all anyway without healing first. Listen to Coach Lee. It’s best that you don’t engage with whatever she does. Go no contact but don’t ignore her if she ever reaches out.
@@Carla-ku7es I agree, I haven't reached out nor have I let it affect my online presence, I still upload/reupload positive/growth focused content that reinforces my values, I have tried to figure it out not knowing if she IS dating or projecting the idea of it OR the more arrogant (on my part) thought it maybe idealising what I brought to her life (I was the first healthy person in her dating life)
Ive just been broken up by my ex of 14 years. Its been 2 months. Ive tried to do NC but she initiates contact everyday. What should i do? I always reply with a brief response. But she keeps reaching out about trivial things.
Be respectful dont be petty about it, say that it is great to hear from her, but she should understand that you guys are not together anymore. I know this is not an easy thing to do, but in order for her to feel your absence and your value in her life, you have to cut the contact. If she is showing an effort to get back together and especially meet you in person that is okay to handle it with calmness and coolness but other than that you shouldn't stay in contact with her and answer whatever she shoots your way.
@@RebelliouSTRthis is absolutely spot on advice. Especially if she insisted the breakup. Focus on yourself (proverbial) and grow mentality to a point where even if she did come back, you valued yourself so much higher you may not even want her back. Always strive to develop :)
Send her the money so you’re square and no hard feelings, then back to NC and focus on you, your self development. Your life will be amazing and so levelled up after you do.
@@supremejangaming508 just wanna see people succeed man. I was there once, been there it all, refocused my life and learned more than I could imagine. Wanna give back to make us all strive forward. Coach Lee is awesome; would love if you followed as well. Either way, keep your head up and look forwards :)
@@supremejangaming508 you’re welcome! Keep goin, I made all the mistakes when I was younger. Centered my next moves around girls I dated and kept getting hurt. Finally went down the improvement journey and changed my life, so now I just wanna give back. Coach Lee is great, fllw me too I would be grateful. Have a great weekend :)
Coach Lee, please do a video on how to respond to an ex when they reach out to you after you did no contact and they’re the one who broke up with you. My gf broke up with me and I’m in full no contact. But I want to be ready for the future on how I should respond and conduct myself if she reaches out.
@@Compulsive-Elk7103 if she reaches out, ask her out on a date.. (if you want her back that is).. if she tries to get you into a platonic thing, tell her you’re not interested in friendship, and if she ever changes what she wants get in touch.
Tell her to come over for a date, and make it romantic… if she is hesitant or tries to friend zone you, tell her you’re not interested in being friends and go right back to NC until she changes her mind
@@ElevateMyRelationships unfortunately we are long distance. What can I do in this situation where we’re not close ? Since she broke up with me, it’s on her to reach out. If she does , then I will replicate her energy until she says something. In the mean time , yes I’m focused on myself.
@@Compulsive-Elk7103 yes long distance does make it a bit more challenging; you can apply the same concept, ask if she has rethought her position and is interested in you romantically again (again, if that’s what you want) and if she hasn’t, on to the next. But definitely date others close to you in the meantime. Big world out there :)
Social media has poisoned so many things
You’re not wrong there. It’s crazy.
@@DonaldMeyers-v8c agreed. Relationships are replaceable, and not many have values or morals anymore. Marriage doesn't mean anything either.
@@NotJoeBiden_LGBFJB you got that right. And that's sad
They think life is better alone.
Social media has made everyone think they have way more opportunities than they realistically do. It’s also created so much more grass is greener syndrome is just sad
Just had the same conversation with my ex. I told her good luck in life and if she changes her mind she has my number. Back to no contact and back to the gym
Well done king 👑
Keep working hard, mind as much as body!
@@ElevateMyRelationships thank you for your content, it really does help me understand and guide my responses
@@scottmiller9374 this is Coach Lee’s, and he is awesome. You can see mine as well if you want. Have a great weekend :)
@@scottmiller9374 luv if you watched mine too. All the best
I was doing so good without him. He came back and is now confusing me and making me crazy with the mixed signals
How log you been break up?
@@anoopunnikrishan2771 4 months
Mixed signals means he's not interested and is only keeping you around as an option. He has no genuine desire for you. If he did, he would make it clear.
I was in a 9 year relationship and we've recently broken up and my heart hearts so bad...
He's texted a few times asking the name of this or that but that's about all.
@jenrn1147 yeah I had to block mine and told him to leave me alone because he's just hurting me with the bread crumbs.
Make sure you go no contact for longer than the amount of time you begged or chased. If you begged or chased for 2 weeks, then you better stay away for 3 weeks atleast. You seem less crazy this way.
@@Mypineappleprincess good job, keep it up. I'm gonna try to reach out in 30 days from now. Every person is different and I think by 30 days there will be forgiveness.
@Ryancdickinson95 you're going to hurt your chances of truly reconciling the relationship. She isn't attracted to you right now because she doesn't see you as high value. Being a high value man means you stay away. You want her to see you as high value and make her feel like she missed out. That's why no contact is so hard. Please do not reach out to them.
@@Ryancdickinson95 Brother, don't do it. No contact is indefinite.
If you got broken up with then getting in contact is on them
If they broke up with you, it’s their job to reach out to you.
If you broke up with them then it’s your job to reach out to them.
Lol "less crazy"
I got my ex back by thinking she wants me , so think she wants you and she'll come back
I made a big mistake. He dumped me after 5years of being together. After 8 months of NC, he came back, saying he missed me, loved me, and wanted to be with me. I was too enthusiastic and took him back right away. But after just 3 days, he started acting strange. When I suggested meeting up, he said I was pressuring him. I told him I couldn’t play these games anymore, and he said it would be better for us to break up. Basically, he dumped me again. I’ve never felt so hurt, so lost, and so humiliated… and I still do. I can’t sleep; I’m angry at myself, depressed, and exhausted.
Everyone says to focus on myself, go to therapy, do what I love, spend time with family and friends… and I do. But it hasn’t gotten any easier for me. A year has passed, and I still can’t get over it. I didn’t know he could be so cruel, especially when he knew how much I loved him. Now, I don’t cry because of him-it feels like I lost a big part of myself… I lost love
I'm in this situation trust me you're not alone. It's painful and cruel but remember it says more about them than it does about you. Ask yourself is this the kind of man you want to be with? So inconsiderate of your emotions?
@@_Diaryofwealth thank you so much for responding... I am in conflict with myself, I understand everything, but my heart lives its own life... I want to forget everything and not feel anything. I’m just tired…I can’t take it anymore.
It seems like your partner isn’t really considering your emotions or your reactions to their behavior, which is not a good sign for a healthy relationship dynamic. You need someone who is empathetic, emotionally invested, and present, in order to create a sustainable relationship. Otherwise, you may constantly feel bad, stuck in a power dynamic that could harm your self-esteem, leading to depression. That’s why most professionals recommend moving on. In the meantime, you can explore skills, medication, or therapy to help balance your hormone levels, particularly serotonin, dopamine, and oxytocin.
@@niks3641 thank you for your response ❤
Leska that is so sad. I'm wishing you well and I hope you find a good man
My x always says, " They can't see us together for the long term," so guard up on Mr dump truck. Because two years of being dumped sucks.
Thank you coach Lee. Thank you so much. You don't know how much you have done for me. Wish you all the happiness in the world.
I’m 2 months 3 days of NC, I’m watching clips about it daily but to be honest, I don’t want him back but wanted to pay back once he shows strong evidence that he wants me back then I will feed him with his own medicine! Don’t get me wrong! He hurts me so much! This is a long term relationship of 18 years involving kids!
Try and work it out for the kiddos
@@timpierce1967 if it works I would keep the marriage! Thank you
Revenge rarely works out in your favor. It will spoil more than you anticipate
Coach Lee is a rare human voice in the landscape of egotistic, cold-hearted, intellectualized relationship experts.
Many thanks!
I so agree with everything that you said Coach Lee. You speak facts!
I keep getting no caller I’d calls of silence, pretty sure it’s an excuse to hear me, I’ve gotten like four!!
hey coach lee. i want to say thank you for making those videos, they help me go through the break up. they still didn’t contact me (they broke up with me 1st october) and first 13 days were agony, next was alright, i felt good, like i didn’t care about him, felt strong.
But now, yesterday and today i started feeling those emotions coming back, me missing him, being so curious how could’ve he dumped me, i loved him so much.. it’s just..
thank you so much, you bring me hope there is a chance he’ll contact me, i’ve watched numerous videos of yours..
My ex broke up with me October 1st also. I messed up the first week begging, and pleading. If I hadn't have found Chicago Lee's videos I probably would still be chasing her. He's been a real help in understanding certain things. I feel a little better, but now I'm trying to focus on me, and less on her. She ignores me still, and I'm still blocked, but it's affecting me less, and less.
@@damianchildress4439 To simply put, we met on roblox, dated for a year, i wanted to move to Australia for him (ended up loving the country, so im moving anyways) and this summer his mom found my nudes on phone and he got scared.
He and his family are religious, so.. he broke up, because “we couldn’t date cuz his mom keeps an eye” then he came back and asked to date anyways, which i said no to because he had no plan. After few weeks i came back to him.
Well… After some time, everything was fine, second break up was when his friends bullied him and he got “pressured” (not by them but by his own thoughts) into breaking up with me. I ended up coming back few days later.
Now this time. He went to the christian camp, and when came back he said that he chose to stay closer to god and.. we should stay friends.
I of course said no and we broke up. He promised he’ll never break up with me over religion.
I believe the no contact while focusing on self improvements has had a major impact. Changing my look also seems to have sparked a major interest when I bumped into my ex. Kept it cordial when she showed interest, but made sure to not to over extend myself which prompted her to reach out less than 24 hours later for the first time in almost 2 months after the breakup.
Excellent advice! Thank you coach!🤗
My ex and her friends and family have been showing increasingly positive signs from casual reach outs, questioning my stories, posting old stuff related to me and our anniversary, and my ex showed up at church looking for someone with her friends one week after she found out I was going But she hasn’t reached out and she reposts negative breakup stuff on TikTok. I don’t understand
Don’t reach out. I bet you they will eventually. Keep focusing on you and make sure they know you’re improving yourself and keeping the energy on you
My showed up to my brothers company, she used to work there before and started to speak about me to him, at first she was singing my name out loud and then my brother asked her if she was happy with the breakup, she couldn’t answer, instead she began to talk bad about me to him. What could that be ? I’m in nc for 3 months now
So my avoidant ex broke up with me and blindsided me saying she say i should go be with someone else and started saying alot of nasty things to push me away, feeling betrayed and lied to I freaked out and broke alot of her things. She does still love and miss me but she's scared of me. I've taken time to do my research on avoidants and I know that when they start stonewalling it doesn't mean they don't love you. Long story short I had a bad reaction and that's not me and I'll never do that again, I've learned from it and have progressed alot in knowing how to be in a relationship with her and I understand her alot better. I've already told her take her time to heal I will work on myself for our relationship. What should I do? Will she feel like coming back to me if she's no longer scared or did I mess up no contact by saying u heal and I'll work on myself and I'll wait for you? P.s. we were together for a year and she has a kid that isn't mine and we built such a strong bond together, I just messed up bad because I didn't know anything about avoidants and just thought I got played.
Hi Coach...I was in a 7-month relationship, and although I was initially skeptical, he was very sure about us from the start. He even told his parents about me and introduced me to them. However, last month he began questioning me and whether I was the right fit for him. That made me panic, and I started agreeing to everything he said, just to make things work. Then, after an argument 17 days ago, he said, 'Let's give it one last chance,' but the next morning, I called him multiple times-around 10 times-due to something urgent, and since then, he’s gone silent. He hasn't spoken to me since. I cried for two days, begged, and pleaded, but when I didn’t hear back, I stopped contacting him. It’s been 15 days now.
I never raised my voice, never said anything hurtful. I was always there for him, understanding his family and supporting him. Do you think he might reconsider this?
Woah coach! Great advice!
You are the best coach,coach lee I like how u explain everything ❤
Great video coach Lee !
Here is my question for a lot of people who have been in the same situation.
If you caused an argument for being overly jealous and said mean things to your partner and verbally disrespected them, yet later apologized but they still choose to leave you even though they love you. Do you still go in to no contact even though it was your fault for being mean and disrespectful.
@@JavierJuarez-m1n If you apologized and said your part, You basically have to let them be. If they forgive you and come back, be better then. But you have to give them time until they are ready.
@@ElevateMyRelationships thank you just to clarify do I still go into no contact after the apology ? She did mention she doesn’t want to completely cut ties.
@@JavierJuarez-m1n Well she did mention she doesn’t want to cut ties, however, as I understand it, you don’t want to be platonic friends so you still have to be true to yourself.
It’s good that she accepted your apology, but you still want to clearly communicate that you want her as a romantic interest, and if she doesn’t want that right now, yes be disciplined and continue no contact and tell her to reach out if she ever wants something more.
At that point, you have to give her space and respect her, but continue to build yourself and learn all these things. You’ll come out great in the other side if she does come back, or, somebody else comes into your life.
Hope this helps. If it does I wouldn’t mind a follow :)
@@JavierJuarez-m1n I personally don't think you need to be so open with your intent for your ex partner. According to Coach Lee, your openness is a form of intimacy and that is something that you should be depriving your partner of during no contact. That being said, you should be true to yourself if you don't want a friendship but want and intimate relationship. According to coach Lee this is why you engage in no contact. The no contact is telling your partner that you are not interested in a friendship relationship. In another video he says not to tell them you aren't interested in more than a friendship but instead to minimize the request and blow it off by just saying something like "sure okay" but then going through with the no contact anyway. I don't know your situation but in mine she said she wanted to be friends and I agreed before finding Coach Lee, but I noticed I was the only one reaching out to her and if I didnt reach out then neither did she. This is why I went to no contact and it actually looks like its working. The missing piece of the puzzle is to work on yourself while in no contact so that when your ex sees you or sees your social media she sees a changed person and she becomes curious. After the no contact and working on improving my physical appearance and mental attitude towards myself and watching videos on how the female mind works as well as making financial and self help improvements, my ex saw me in person because I was asked by her dad to do some work for him and she started texting me like crazy the next day. When I saw her I acted like I had some place to go. I was cordial but showed her she was not the center of my attention. I was worried I made things awkward but all of a sudden after 3 weeks of no contact and a month of self improvement including a new hairstyle and going to the gym, she is suddenly texting like crazy, making jokes and opening up more about her life. I cant say where its headed but it is a complete change from her never reaching out to me and giving me one word responses like she felt forced to communicate.
@@sburgos9621 hello did you guys get back together yet ??
So you should literally mirror them in all circumstances.. if they're avoidant you go avoidant. If they're giving mixed signals you give mixed signals.. this mirroring should draw you together as equals?
All this no contact is killing me... Its torture to just wait around when she is living like she wants, and i am hurting...
That's the hardest thing to deal with. I've been there. Its miserable.
You aren't supposed to be waiting around. You should be making improvements in your life. Physical and mental as well as focusing on your life goals. The changed you in conjunction with no contact will arouse curiosity in your ex. From there you need to take things slow once your ex reaches out so you don't look easily had and destroy the mystery the no contact created.
If it’s a torture to just wait then reach out then come back and tell us how it went.
I want to know what goes on inside the head of some man. Why not work on a realtionship when you have something good...
@@margreetweistra1538 as coach lee said, attraction fell
Just because you think it is good doesn't mean the other person thinks that. The other person either wants something different or better. You don't get to decide that for them.
Mine was hot & cold during the majority of the relationship while pregnant. I'm pretty sure she's a narcissist with a power trip since she ended things again in July. I've been played. It's a one way street.
Narcissist always have one foot out the door. They will always try to exert control and power over all situations and they will always try to have one up on you. If they're in fact a narcissist, stay away from them. Absence and silence is all they deserve
Great video
Great vid
My ex is looking at all my stories on social media. They are never about me but my business. What does that mean?
No contact for about 2 weeks for a one year relationship but when we are in person she still laughs and jokes with me like when we were together I have no idea what this means
Are you certain she wasn't also with seeing other men besides you? Some women who are capable of being that casual and nonchalant about a break means there's another man so their comfortable with how things are
@@sloanmagnum5009 I’m not 100% certain but if she is it’s an unusually well kept secret
She texted me the night I wrote that comment saying she really misses me, still loves me, still wants me in her life but she needs time to heal from the break up and doesn’t want to get too attached. Made me feel better at first but now I’m even more confused
Am in NC for 9 months now.. however we work in the same company together. He broke up with me saying we were not compatible (my mistake as I was too insecure and immature) but he would always include me in everything and held a celebration for my birthday with customised cake and a nice dinner with the team. He would sometimes ask my colleagues how I’m doing and we would make eye contact whenever he passes by my table. However he is still cold on text and we’re in NC😢 it’s hard to move on especially when we see each other every other day at work, it’s been very confusing and I’m at lost of what to do
I got mixed signals some days ago, we were talking for like 3 hours and all that time she kept repeating "I really miss you, you are in my mind all day" "I miss spending all day with you" "Everything remembers me of you" and I was so happy that I rushed things and asked her if that means she wants to get back togheter, obviously the response was NO and I hate myself for falling into that and having that moment of weakness.
We are now back into No Contact and I have her blocked everywhere, but I'm still afraid that she can't stay away and contact me in between this week or so.
I don't know what to do now.
It sounds like she is either certified crazy or is playing you for a fool. Either way, you need to stay away and move on to something else.
My ex giving me mixed signals. She wanted some time apart, and only after four days she text me that she carved some pumpkins and asked if I had any trick-or-treaters come to my house. I'm so confused.
I love the warrior boat burning fun fact
When she asked me to go stay with my brother for a bit and i freaked out and she told me why would i think we would not be back together. ? 😢 im so confused
What? So she wants you to stay somewhere else but also wants to be back together? Is that what you're saying?
@sloanmagnum5009 Yeah, I don't know what she is thinking 🤔
He was talking with the Air port employee about me he said to him for sit but didn't say to me,he checked my passport and said go to the Airoplane. When he came to the Airoplane I thought this is the another person ,he is not because he sat hiding he should say me direct.
I was lucky as i went into no contact without knowing it was even a thing. I made my mind up to turn my back and be gone. She has continued to contact me over the last 4 months. 3 weeks ago i told her not to text or call me but thursday just gone i had 2 missed calls which i didnt respond to. I think my dumper has got the message, im gone for good
none of the advice of this video will work, if the woman who broke up with you has already have another guy that she's sleeping with.
Don't go back to anyone who already slept with someone else
Coach Lee does say that in thr video that some relationship are over and the person should move on. This would be one of those cases
Personally I dont think I could forgive my ex if she was sleeping with someone else then came back. Would make me feel like she is just shopping around and may never settle aside from the disrespect that shows. If I were you I would be slamming every girl in your vicinity and let her know that you are the desirable one that she lost out on.
He left 3 years ago. I was crying for over 1 year. I still hope he comes back but maybe i get just mixed signals. I feel stuck cause i could be with someone else but i only feel love for my ex. Im scared to tell him i have found someone and he is just happy for me...also i feel bad knowing that i cant give love to that new men
If he says direct to me I will be agreed with him.
We need video on the disappearing ex
Ran into mine in public
next day hospital the next day all day with her
n text the 3rd day then disappeared
Hey Coach Lee,
My ex just texted me “Would you give me a chance to make it workout” and he deleted that message like 30 minutes later.
What should I do? I have been no contact for 1 month and a half.
I am confused. Should I text him or ignore the fact that he tried to reach out.
@@victoriaalonso9127 I think it’s better you meet in person. Tell him you two should talk in person :)
carla is right. you should talk. maybe he is afraid from being rejected. you could initiate now contact.
So, am I doomed? I did nocontact for 2 months. She contacted me with an excuse to give me stuff I forgot. We talked for an hour and had fun. It was light. However, we hugged at the end and I kissed her. She returned it but still, I wish I didn't do that. I just acted too quick I feel. What's your opinion ? Am I doomed? I haven't reached out but it's been three days and I haven't heard from her.
Can you please do a video when your spouse files but you don’t sign right away and want to drag it on and if no contact can still work especially if they moved to a new country (if they are military)
How does it work for someone with a child? Our child turns 2 months old this week. She left exactly a week after he was born. I’ve been doing my own thing, first few weeks we didn’t talk at all. Then conversation started and we talked til early hours of the morning for 3-4 nights and she was joking and bringing up old funny memories. Almost seemed as if nothing happened. But I wanted closure as to why she did it and her answers aggravated me so I’ve cut communication unless it’s about our child. This is the 2nd time she’s left, and I’m to the point I don’t “need” her anymore, but I wouldn’t mind having her because I do love her. During our child exchanges through the week she’s all smiles and try’s making conversation but I keep it short and to the point.
The most confusing message she sent me is “right now I don’t want it, but maybe a few months or years we will decide we want to be together”. Makes me want to sit around and wait because I’m loyal, and when I love I love. But at the same time I don’t want to wait around forever..
I think the element of curiosity and mystery is what the no contact creates. Think of ways to be mysterious. make major improvements in your life and don't be so open giving her any details. Im sure there are more ways you can create mystery if you think about it.
I begged the first week, then i try contact 2 weeks later, went to no contact for 1 month. Then i broke it again. Now im in no contact for 1 in half month. Since i mess up for the 3 first months, whats my odds coach?
We had a good 9 year relationship, i was the first and only boyfriend she had in her life. But she's very certain of her decision
Stay strong, im in nc since 15.08. It will be easyer.
There is an advantage when you get dumped by a narcissist, once they go they never look back, which is fine by me, 1 year of no contact and I hope it stays like this.
A true narcissist will attempt to establish contact at some point in time. They won't do it because they care or miss you tho. They do to stroke their ego and see if they have control. They would then find away to discard you and leave again. But yes, if they're a real narcissist and they do leave you alone forever, consider your self very lucky
@@sloanmagnum5009exact my ex ghosted me from nowhere few days after I talked about some spiritual stuff God told me since august I broke no contact 2 but I’ve been in no contact for 1,5 months now all he want is control he is a true narcissist he never broke up with me directly I asked him face 2 face in July he said he didn’t want to break up and he is not afraid of me if he wanted that he’ll let me know but disappeared without any notice they’re true psychopath
For me there is something in their head that doesn’t work properly, he is avoidant he hates confrontation prefer to ghost and lie, look like he is 12 in his head thanks God during these last 3 months I’ve work a lot to detach emotionally from him cause he was so toxic I don’t love him anymore my eyes are wide open now
Would you be willing to do a video on initiating no contact after agreeing to a friendship?
Any advice for someone who was too eager during a meet up ?
I found these videos afterwards.
you would have to now do the opposite of eager. Although it's kind of manipulative, it's really the only thing you can do if you're still trying to engage with this person
Hi Coach Lee, i wonder if you can help me with my situation: my 10 year spouse left me 8 months ago, even though she never pushed or even mentioned the divorce for all this time (i think she is just afraid of doing all the paper stuff) she stated very clearly that attraction has gone and she felt that relationship with me was like a death trap. She said that she want nothing from me but friendly conversations. I'm trying to give her a NC, but she text me ALL THE TIME as if nothing happened. I'm also following all your other advices for months like "giving her peace" "small positive interactions" etc and we have a very positive meetings once or two a month but it feels like things are never moving forward and nothing really changes. I think the problem here is might be that she is always have me in touch (as you advised many times before i am not ignoring her texts) and she doesn't really feel the loss. What should i do in a situation like this? I cant ignore her, but at the same time i need her to feel the consequences. Is she just using me as her training wheels? Should i just be patient and keep doing this? Honestly the whole situation has been extremely exhausting for me, this rollercoaster of emotions doesn't stop since she texts me all the time evoking my emotions. I am at the point where i want to just tell her something rude like "don''t talk to me anymore please" since it brings me a lot of pain. Any tips?
Do you consider yourself a nice guy, a good guy?
@@sloanmagnum5009 i am 100% not, i was always an egotistic douchebag who is trying to reform
I would say be honest and say you don’t want to talk to her as much as you all do. Say it’s not fair to you bc it hurts you and that you wish her well but you don’t want to continue on with how your relationship has been. She will then feel the loss and eventually she will come back but in a more serious way!
He is hiding from me , hardly i recognise him soon he went away .He came to meet me why he didn't said to me for sit.
Hey coach lee can you do a video about getting back with your ex & their behavior hasn’t changed after no contact?
Leave them , cause you guys will break up again
Ugh when I hang out with my ex he plays all these songs around me that sounds like he’s regretting our break up and then he’ll do all the flirting with me kissing and everything but then says he don’t want to get back together ugh so over I’m going NC
Coach, I got blocked everywhere a month ago. This past weekend she sent me a friend request on snapchat, to do that she had to think to unblock me. I accepted, but no messages were exchanged (I definitely wasn't gonna message first). I was unfriended and blocked again 2 days after that. What do you make of that?
I bought the emergency break up kit .
Ldr, we were supposed to meet in Poland , I asked him to say each other there to say good bye each other there . He refused saying that he doesn’t want to open the wound with a long message .
I gracefully back up saying that it’s hard for me to remember how things finished but I wish him peace in his process .
17 days of no contact . I went to Paris instead to see my cousin . When he saw my story there , he published right away this quote :
She later edxplained to me that behavior is how we speak the unspeakable . John couldn’t spezk something unspeakable . So he did it
A commun friend on instagram saw that , he told me . But I didn’t react because I don’t open his stories .
Since then , he increased his posts . Like he’s doing good . Posting and deleting or masking me .
He’s on dates apps though .
Btw he watches all my stories
What do you think coach ?
አንተ ባለውለታዬ ነህ አመሰግናለሁ ወንድሜ በአንተ ምክንያት ነፃ ወጥቻለሁ አሁን ደስተኛ ነኝ
I was in a relationship for 6 years. She broke up with me. We went no contact for 14 days. She contacted me, and now we are talking daily. She said she is enjoying this but doesn't want any commitment. However, she seems very interested in talking and spending time. What should I do? Please help.
she is friendzoning you. if you want her, don't be her friend. she has to miss you. go no contact. otherwise you help her to get over you. check the other videos from coach lee, maybe even get his emergency break up kit (it brings the most important points in a few videos, so you don't have to go through 1000 videos).
you could tell her: "being friends with the ex never worked at never will work. there's only a relationship possible. if you change mind your mind you have my number. i wish you the best".
but don't make her feel you will wait for her your whole life.
stay focused on your self! become the person you always wanted to become. don't show pain. that's the best chance to win.
if it's a date, okay, but looks like no.
If you’re already giving her what she wants without being her boyfriend what motivation will she get to want to get back together?
2,5-3 months since she broke up with me went in to no contact after 2-3 weeks trying to fix it when I realized I was kinda begging I stopped. After 41 days no contact she texted me with I light convo and that’s she just wanted to see how I am doing replied casual and I didn’t carry the convo. Still waiting on something significant. It has been 4 weeks since then. I might do it myself in 2 weeks because I think she might be afraid or doesn’t know what to do. I know she misses me and that she is sad. Should I call her or would she reach out again?
If you still want her, checking up on her would be a great start. But make sure you dont seem to eager.
@@antgwuapo okay but how should I do that I would like to just call her and ask her if she would like to meet up I don’t want to play games I have changed I don’t want to give and get mixed signals
You will end up presenting yourself as a pursuer once more and that's not good for you. If your ex realise his or her mistake she will do anything to get you back. What struck me most from what coach lee said is if you push for it and you get her, you are creating a room for her to do it again. Don't jump the gun. What will be will surely be. Focus on yourself. Your ex is not worth dying for if she can dump you!
I am in the same situation as you. The ex is seeking contact but is not ready for getting back yet. In my case he did reach out 1 time, and it is nearly 1 month i didnt hear something from him. It was just à casual talk without proposing from his side to see each other. I think he is just testing the water, which is an progress for sûre. Otherwise the ex would take the initiative to see each other at least. In my case, i do nothing. I do not reach back and i stay reserved untill the moment he reaches back again to drink or see each other or something. I dont have him back, but im making progress with no contact. And i try to be confortable with it....
@@maja-5727 I think she might be afraid to reach out to me and getting rejected because I have went totally silent which she never thought I could. On the other side it feels like I need to try because she broke up with me because I pushed her a little bit away by neglecting her and I didn’t want to stay there until I have changed myself. It feels like ik nearly there and when I’m ready I want to reach out to have a talk because I know she misses me but she doesn’t want to get hurt again and I need to be sure to be with her again but on a different type of level
Coah lee this may/may not sound insane not only have i used no contact for 6 yrs, i also texted her early oct.i feel stuck
learn to let go, it's hard but you are hurting your self. if she wanted you she would let you know, right? but she doesn't, right? go date other people and dont have expectations, focus on your self. love your self. that's how you escape this trap.
@ I appreciate the advice I’m also 26 yrs old and I officially moved on with my romantic life even tho I’ll still watch his videos they help me
My ex keeps going from posting romantic idealisation to then deleting it and then posting it again (video's like "when you find the one who makes you feel special") it's been 2 months of NC now but this behaviour is so wild, she is mature enough to know content like that would hurt me and make her look bad, any reason ex's do this?
She’s hurting and wants to hurt you too. Also, she wants to get your attention. Don’t engage in that kind of behavior. If she ever reflects on her actions, she might feel embarrassed later on. Unfortunately, if she doesn’t, then it might be a blessing that you broke up. She has to heal her own wounds first. She’ll never be able to give you her all anyway without healing first. Listen to Coach Lee. It’s best that you don’t engage with whatever she does. Go no contact but don’t ignore her if she ever reaches out.
@@Carla-ku7es I agree, I haven't reached out nor have I let it affect my online presence, I still upload/reupload positive/growth focused content that reinforces my values, I have tried to figure it out not knowing if she IS dating or projecting the idea of it OR the more arrogant (on my part) thought it maybe idealising what I brought to her life (I was the first healthy person in her dating life)
Completely remove any focus of her. Work on you non stop man; :)
Ive just been broken up by my ex of 14 years. Its been 2 months. Ive tried to do NC but she initiates contact everyday. What should i do? I always reply with a brief response. But she keeps reaching out about trivial things.
Im going through a similar situation
Be respectful dont be petty about it, say that it is great to hear from her, but she should understand that you guys are not together anymore. I know this is not an easy thing to do, but in order for her to feel your absence and your value in her life, you have to cut the contact. If she is showing an effort to get back together and especially meet you in person that is okay to handle it with calmness and coolness but other than that you shouldn't stay in contact with her and answer whatever she shoots your way.
@@RebelliouSTRthis is absolutely spot on advice. Especially if she insisted the breakup. Focus on yourself (proverbial) and grow mentality to a point where even if she did come back, you valued yourself so much higher you may not even want her back. Always strive to develop :)
Need help, Me and my ex are in NC for 25 days now but, I owe her money. What should I do? Because I really don’t want to break no contact
Send her the money so you’re square and no hard feelings, then back to NC and focus on you, your self development. Your life will be amazing and so levelled up after you do.
@@ElevateMyRelationships thank you so much 🙏🏽
@@supremejangaming508 just wanna see people succeed man. I was there once, been there it all, refocused my life and learned more than I could imagine. Wanna give back to make us all strive forward. Coach Lee is awesome; would love if you followed as well. Either way, keep your head up and look forwards :)
@@supremejangaming508 you’re welcome! Keep goin, I made all the mistakes when I was younger. Centered my next moves around girls I dated and kept getting hurt. Finally went down the improvement journey and changed my life, so now I just wanna give back. Coach Lee is great, fllw me too I would be grateful. Have a great weekend :)
@@supremejangaming508 :)
Coach Lee, please do a video on how to respond to an ex when they reach out to you after you did no contact and they’re the one who broke up with you.
My gf broke up with me and I’m in full no contact. But I want to be ready for the future on how I should respond and conduct myself if she reaches out.
@@Compulsive-Elk7103 if she reaches out, ask her out on a date.. (if you want her back that is).. if she tries to get you into a platonic thing, tell her you’re not interested in friendship, and if she ever changes what she wants get in touch.
Tell her to come over for a date, and make it romantic… if she is hesitant or tries to friend zone you, tell her you’re not interested in being friends and go right back to NC until she changes her mind
@@Compulsive-Elk7103 in the meantime tho; focus on you.. keep levelling up physically and mentally
@@ElevateMyRelationships unfortunately we are long distance. What can I do in this situation where we’re not close ?
Since she broke up with me, it’s on her to reach out. If she does , then I will replicate her energy until she says something.
In the mean time , yes I’m focused on myself.
@@Compulsive-Elk7103 yes long distance does make it a bit more challenging; you can apply the same concept, ask if she has rethought her position and is interested in you romantically again (again, if that’s what you want) and if she hasn’t, on to the next. But definitely date others close to you in the meantime. Big world out there :)
You guys are getting signals? 😂
I didn't like you okay