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@@babylilylolxd6807 sexuality isn’t a choice lmao. usually i’d say this to a homophobe but you’re implying that anyone can just “switch” and go date someone of the same sex, even if they’re straight. you might not be straight but they are, doesn’t mean it’s a stereotype.
The "scared of happiness" part is so personal for me. I'm so scared whenever I make some progress with people I like because I think they are going to hate me once they see what I really am. I feel more comfortable when they are distant to me, that way, I won't feel the pain of them pushing away when we are close.
i agree, i'm always stuck with the constant fear that i'll just get too happy and then the most tragic event is just building up on me and will just hit me out of nowhere and affect my mental state.
im always doing something outside, but alone, 50% of the time im on camps, the other 50% im eating at a food outlet. But staying home with a s/o is really amazing. Ive experienced it, and its great, but im single now, and food is bae 😂😂
1. You have cynical views about love 2. Unrealistic standarts 3. You've set too many dealbreakers ( expecting too much ) 4. Unresolved past trauma 5. Low self esteem 6. You have a fear of happiness 7. Trust issues 8. You think you lose your independence when being in a relationship 9. You want someone you can't or shouldn't have 10. You don't learn from your mistakes
I'm a 33-year-old male and never had a date or anything. This pain of loneliness throughout time hurt so much I almost made the worst mistake anyone could do. Now, I've realized I believed the false beliefs that I was unworthy of love. Making it to where I wouldn't even give myself a chance. Now Im trying to work on myself and change those beliefs. Hopefully, things will change within time.
That depends on your "other", there is little you could ever do to influence that. People suck and will always let you down and prove your cynicism correct.
I'm hitting 30 year mark soon and I'm lonely too without any romantic relationship experience. Used to think about my misery while being addicted to different drugs past 10 years. But suddenly realised it so much easy to make a new contacts with anybody just being straight honest about yourself, joking about your flaws to make 'em your strenghts. Somehow I find myself really unintirested in finding that special one, because I feel independent and too much confident. Wanna be with someone, who's basically reflection of me. But there are some big fault. I'm introverted, and it seems I'm easy to go, but it takes a lot of energy to make it happen. Also I was scamming people, and find myself manipulative, which makes me weak geniunely. So I rather be single, because I won't harm anybody, who is pure and sincere, on the other hand, I demolish immature and weak people with honestly spoken word, and there were no one smarter than me to kick my ass for this. Maybe it happen sometime, but I can honestly say the devilish truth about myself without any doubt or fear. I'm way too much destructive typo, dunno what to do about this. And this is nasty. I don't feel shame or anger, I feel nothing, when somebody strong and good tries to hit me in weak spot. I'm ready to take the hit and absorb the damage. I'm who I am. Strong and confident of being such a bad human. I just never came over border of intimacy. Never feeling fear, only realizing I'm a dangerous one for someone purehearted.
I'm a 33 year old woman and had one relationship which was barely an experiment to experience things. And trust me, if it's not the right person, it's more of a liability than an achievement. The sexual things aren't worth it if you don't like them. You want to receive love but you also want to enjoy the company of the other one. It's no fun if it's one sided.
I think one biggest issue is that people often believe that being in a relationship can solve all their problems. It won't. It certainly is magical but if you're counting on someone else to change your life, it would become toxic
Yeah, I feel everyone should try to find happiness within themselves before anyone else. Not saying you have to be completely enlightened within yourself, but at least trying puts a better perspective on how a relationship may be; compared to a dependant relationship that has an unhealthy expectation one may have for their partner, I feel.
Aside from the fact that I can never have my crush, it's the fear of losing independence for me. I've been single all my life and I've gotten so used to it. It's so empowering yet scary.
You won't know until you try, right? The best way to get over fears is to face them head-on. A healthy relationship is a union of two individuals growing together and sharing their lives. A lover should be an addition to your already established life. You can be independent and be committed to someone at the same time. Communicating with your partner what constitutes your independence will allow you to preserve it and help them respect it, or you'll realize you're incompatible and break it off before both of you get too invested in it. There is some degree compromise to this, if independence for you means I can do what I want whenever I want without any regard towards my partner's thoughts and feelings, then yeah you're gonna have to work on learning how to accomodate and balance your life so there is room for yourself and your desires as well as your partner's. But those compromises are usually pretty small in the grand scale of things. Your life shouldn't look much different from what it was when you were single. Usually, the biggest difference is that you willingly give up the freedom to mess around sexually and emotionally with other people. Those things are reserved for your partner.
Ive been single my entire life too, i had a huge crush on this girl for 5-6 years, the split second i even laid eyes on her in 2015 i feel in love, she was my first crush & my first time ever feeling that. I never made any moves on her as i knew i had no chance with her & i knew she would say no anyway. I lost that feeling in 20/21 anytime i see her now i dont feel anything & im like “whatever idc”. I wish i could get rid of that feeling of love toward people its an annoyance, no girl irl has even spoke to me within the last 4 years. I hate being with people i only want to be alone but for some reason i just want a relationship, i get the feeling usually when im super bored which is pretty much every second of the day
0:37 You have cynical views about love 1:07 You have unrealistically high standards 1:37 You have too many dealbreakers 2:08 You have unresolved past trauma 2:40 You have low self-esteem 3:16 You fear fulfillment 3:56 You have trust issues 4:22 You think a relationship makes you lose independence 5:00 You want someone you can't or shouldn't have 5:25 You don't learn from your mistakes
@@nogymforyourface49 There's a lot of both data and examples that disagree with that. Some people are mangled in accidents and still find love. If a bombastically hot guy asked me out but he had the list in the timestamps, I would turn him down.
@@Jackgritty28 Worse still, they often prevent relationships from even getting off the ground. People meet and end up having such bad impressions of each other they cancel each other out immediately without having ever known who that person really is. Sometimes all it takes its just one small faux-pas and that's it. Game over.
24, never dated anyone, I think the more important thing than going out to find a date is to find your own crew, the people you feel super comfy with. Build your confidence and shine, opportunities will be attracted to you.
Reasons to being single 1. Social media ruins relationships 2. Havent met anyone who cant take a break from their phone 3. Now a days people would rather find someone new than fix a problem in a relationship
My reasons- -Overthinking -Being deathly afraid of rejection -What his friends might think of me, as I see them every day (suffice to say, I think this might be a reason for everyone with a crush) -Being disorganized and awkward Lots of etcetera afterwards. It really isn't an exhaustive list, unfortunately. I wish everyone the best in their endeavors of confession and whatnot.
Short summary on Why you were single 1. you had cyinical view on love 2. You set unrealistic standered 3. You've set too many deal breakers 4. you have unresolved past trauma 5. You have low self esteem 6. you have a fear of happiness 7. You have trust issues 8. You think you will lose your independent by being in relationship 9. You want some you can't or shoul'd 10. You don't learn from mistakes
Yeahh me too. I’m also shy a lot of the time. I wonder what people think of shy people. Like I feel like they think we are just there sitting in the corner when in reality My brain is going at it and I’m just constantly thinking about stuff. I want to be more social and talk to people other then my little friends I have. Ahhh antisocial problems🤷♀️😔🤜🤛
@Mr Man probably because it's biologically necessary for our race and society to survive and have families which build sense of community. You are programmed to have something to fight for build for etc..if most of us were single it would be a very selfish society but I could be wrong
SavoryBaby No. It’s not necessary for humans to have families. It can be as simple as communities, but no *need* to be any more intimate. Yes, we are programmed to have something to fight for, it’s ourselves. We, *instinctively*, fight for our own selves. Ironically, overpopulation has become a global problem now. Too many people in this world wants to have a family and what does that lead to? Competition for limited resources. Don’t you think it’s selfish that one family’s happiness can be ruined (poverty) by another’s family in search of their own happiness? No?
It has nothing to do with maturity. It has to do with allowing people to live their lives. Period.. it's their choice if they want to be in a relationship or not.
Reasons: 1. Too shy due to isolation during childhood thanks to overprotective parents who never taught me the essentials about socializing. 2. Overprotective with people due to the first point and also due to past trauma and negative experiences with people. 3. Not feeling connected to most people because I am very different from modt of them 4. Low self esteem 5. Fear of rejection 6. Too uncomfortable around many people due to social anxiety
Reasons I'm single (quite a long list): - I'm shy around women who I find attractive. - I have drastic mood changes from feeling like the coolest dude alive to self loathing and insecurity (wether its about my personality, looks or habits). - Fear of making the same mistakes I did in my past relationships. - *Overthinking* (wether its about the future, fear of possible arguments etc.). - My crushes tend to ignore me in social situations and I struggle trying to fit in sometimes. - My crushes talk to almost everyone but me and like the paragraph above, I have trouble approaching them.
I am the same way with guys I am romantically or sexually attracted to, shy, I just try to remember that guys aren't objects or beings to fear. I do have my issues too but even the guy next door does too.
I understand you, it’s really hard to let go of that, I’m still going through that process at this moment but one day, no matter how long you will love yourself :)) I know it’s a long process that seems to be not going nowhere but it will you just got to you trust yourself and be patient
I was thinking the same thing, even on real life a lot of people thought me that is basically my fault because I have low self-esteem. So basically the reason why i can't get a girlfriend it's because me as a human i have doubts and it's my fault because i need to be 100% confident on every things i do even if it's something that is gonna be dangerous or destroy my social reputation... We're not robots... We make mistakes and sometimes we keep remembering this mistakes and that's ok because we are not gonna make them again... Everytime someone says this to me i get really angry I'm not joking... I understand the point, part of get to know someone that you like is judging but again we are not robots...
I have low self esteem because I'm very skinny... Other guys always tell me to eat more and work out. Even tho I literally eat TONS and do as much martial art-training as I can, my body doesn't change. I'ts kinda unfair because I think I don't even look bad but others are ruining everything without even knowing it. And now my parents expect me to ask out a girl? I'm sorry what? If I asked out a girl she'd probably tell me she doesn't like skeletons or some shit 💀 My dad was mad af because I said I can't talk to girls...I'm just thinking even if I had high self esteem, that doesn't make me a bodybuilder. I'm still a skeleton, it is what it is :/ I feel sorry for disappointing my dad
@@RL-DarkSpark Keep in mind your health is important so if you are skinny but you are very healthy it doesn't really matter...Keep in mind people are just gonna suggest... don't worry too much what they are gonna say...if someone catches your eyes but everyone else say that you are not worth it for her...well do it anyway prove them wrong , be yourself don't try anything crazy. I suggest if your parents are mad at you because you don't have a girlfriend to simply say the truth, explain yourself...i know it's crazy but maybe one day you're gonna meet someone you like and if your friends are not gonna help...well your parents will absolutely help by suggesting what to do.
For my entire 19 years of life, I’ve never even had a “crush”, I never even looked at someone in a romantic way until a few months ago. I’ve met someone who really cares about me and makes me laugh, it’s crazy because I’ve never thought id feel this way-there’s always several people out there for you, just let them come to you and try not push relationships.
Thank u so much!! I’m almost 17 and just can’t have a crush on anyone, I was kind of afraid that I would never love someone, but your comment cheered me on! Good luck with your guy😁
im you, but she doesnt like me back, is already in a relationship with someone who is just "enough" and.. she has way too much emotional baggage to deal with, we have chemistry i like her a lot and care more about her than she does for herself, we argue all the time because we're both stubborn
I am a guy who turned 22 just 4 weeks ago and never had a girlfriend before and its kinda bothering me a lot. I use dating apps but rarely get matches by some 18-23 age girls who ends up ghosting or unmatching me for no reason. I had crush on 2 girls in my college few months ago. One was 19(20 now) and another was 20 or 21 and both rejected me. I do chat with some girls on Instagram whom I knew in high school and they are all 20-22 year olds. I am having a very good chat with a girl who was 2 years my junior in our school days. Now she is 20 and I had the best chat with her for the past 3 days compared to any other girl who lives in my city. But I also like another girl who was my childhood friend when we were in elementary school in 2008-2011. Now she is 21 and only 5-6 months younger than me but we hardly chat much on IG as she doesn't reply to my last message for a week or 2.
@@filipesilva7581 I’m really sorry, I know what it’s like to have feelings for someone and them not feel the same, but a relationship should be fun and enjoyable! Sure you’ll have arguments but it should be a good balance between the two. Some people aren’t meant for each other and still fall in love. You’ll find someone that’s perfect for you one day, I promise :)
@@gillipoli5898 it’s so good it’s talked about! I felt so alone. Sometimes it just takes longer for other people to find their match, if I were you I wouldn’t worry, anyone would be lucky to have you as a partner 💪🏼 keep your head up
I love how this video assumes that there are queues of people wanting to date me that I keep rejecting for some reason. I'm single because literally no one is into me.
If a dog gets constantly kicked, thrown rocks at or rejected by humans for seeking companionship, that dog learns that he is unwanted & all alone... & avoids humans altogether.
Being single isn't all that bad it just really sucks not having anyone to hug, kiss, talk to, care about, be cute with, and make each other happy. :( *EDIT* HOLY HELL!! Thanks for all the likes I've never gotten so many :)
@@stretopovermind9680 who said it's just for the Need of a Hug??? Check yourself in the mirror. He/She mentioned, to kiss, talk to, CARE ABOUT, be cute with... SMH
“They say humans are social animals, they can't live alone. But you can live pretty well by yourself. I tell ya...instead of feeling alone in a group, it's better to have real solitude all by yourself.” - Faye Valentine
Mine too. I'm an accepting, secure, unconditional, non-measuring, non-judging and non-proving partner, but I keep picking partners who aren't. So, obviously, I still need to work on MY secure, self-love, self-valuing side. I'm a fixer, or enabler. I thought (and know) I was the right person, and I essentially am, though not perfect, but I kept picking partners who were not accepting; who were/are judging, blaming, shaming, emotional blackmailing, etc. Here's the catch-22 part: I was willing to accept all that in them, and work on that, together, and individually, but they weren't willing to do that with me. I did trust, and my ideal partner is independent, secure, empathetic, accepting, etc. I was never clingy or needy or jealous. Not in my nature. I had a relatively secure childhood. I am a committed partner. My partners would all agree with this, and even verbally acknowledged this to my face, but I picked partners for whom few measure up. For them, the grass is always greener. It doesn't matter how conscious, evolved, self-loving and self-valuing you are, with purpose and sense of self, if you pick the wrong partner...As Psych to Go says "Relationships take more than one person..." They also take an X-factor, otherwise known as luck. After 40 years in the trenches, I'm here to say that luck is HUGE. There are days when I am convinced it's 95% of whether or not we find/end up with the right partner. But that shouldn't keep us from waking up, being smarter, watching for red flags, asking the right questions, paying attention to their family and family history... I always love the quote from the movie "Good Will Hunting," that Robin Williams' character says: "You're not perfect, sport, and let me save you the suspense: this girl you've met, she's not perfect either. But the question is whether or not you're perfect for each other."
I just got rejected today but i 'm feeling good that i took the courage to confess and let him know that i like him because if i didn't confess to him it will become guilt so now i free from that
Getting attached is scary, because so many times in the past I've gotten attached to someone and they ended up hurting me. It's so, so hard for me to let my guard down.
Don´t let your guard down. It´s not worth the risk. People can´t be trusted, you can´t read minds, so the only person you can really 100% trust is you. Relationships are not like in these retarded romantic movies. These movies have as much in common with reality as action movies have in common with real work of soldiers or policemen.
Letting your guard down isn't always a bad thing. People come in a slew of different varieties, and not all of them are inherently bad people. There are those bad apples who end up hurting you, but you'll always be able to find that person who's actually there for you, and not just themselves. Don't shut people out based on negative experiences in the past, you'll only hurt yourself and others more. Trust me, I've been there. Try and get to know someone for a while, and get to understand them. Open up little by little, not all at once. Just be yourself and try to place a little more faith in people. Hope this helped anyone reading. Take care of yourselves, and stay hydrated.
First of all, many people seem to think or feel they're ugly - whether they are or not. That feeling's there, but it doesn't necessarily speak truth. (and in before something in you says "But I'm really ugly, you don't understand" - yes that's what the feels say in everyone who feels ugly - you're not alone in that :) ). Also, it's my experience that how other people view you is more determined by your attitude and way of expressing than simple physical looks anyway =). "I hate everyone" . Don't know what that is based on, but if you start looking for it, most people have at least something positive about them and that includes yourself. Regardless of what you may feel. If you practice looking for it, you'll start to see it more and more, which makes it easier to make friends, too. Doesn't mean you need to trust strangers or acquaintances blindly with everything, but you can start to gradually grow in trust. Good luck finding happiness - everyone deserves that!
There's something refreshing about knowing I don't have any of these behaviors, but at the same time it's discouraging knowing I don't have any of these behaviors and still am single regardless.
That’s really understandable but forcing love to come to you ends you up in a toxic situation, letting love come to you naturally is the best way to go, there’s definitely someone out there for you, there is for everyone! Just live everyday as it is and let things come towards you instead of pushing it to come to you.
Why I'm single: 1. I'm an Introvert 2. I don't go out of my way to talk to new people. 3. I can't seem to identify if someone is flirting with me and I always assume they're just being nice. 4. I'm scared of getting my heart broken. I've been in relationships where I thought I was in love and they eventual broke up with me. I don't remember how being in love feels, but I remember the pain of heart break. 5. I have pretty low self esteem. 6. I think love is only true in fairy tales, good enough for some, but not for me.
I relate to all except 4 and 6 as I've never even been in a relationship. I never go out of my way to meet new people unless circumstances force me to. I have no ability to flirt and am terrible at identifying if someone is flirting with me unless they're REALLY obvious about it, and even then, it can still take me a while to catch on.
1. Cynical views on love 2. Unrealistic standards 3. You have too many dealbreakers 4. You have unresolved issues 5. You have low self esteem 6. Fear of happiness - push people away 7. Trust issues and jealousy 8. Fear of losing your independence 9. You want someone you can't have 10. You don't learn from your mistakes
This video explained things you shouldn’t do IN a relationship, not how to STOP being **single**, I do none of these behaviours listed in this video and still seem to struggle for totally different reasons, people literally always being already taken when I try to make a move, people not even wanting anything with me after I try to break the ice, honestly I thought I’d learn some mistakes I can avoid in this video but this didn’t help at all, it just shows that you have to be really lucky to get a partner in the first place
@brown power ranger I'm sorry, but I can't take someone seriously when they forget to capitalize the first letter on their words after a period. Also, no reason to be rude like that.
1. You have cynical views about love 2. Unrealistic standards 3. Unresolved past trauma 4. Low self-esteem 5. You have a fear of happiness 6. You think you lose your independence when being in a relationship 7. You want someone you can't or shouldn't have 8.I am an introvert
@@myrkflinn4331 I think the most common one any intelligent man has is cynical views look at the type of dudes women go for..... try dressing in Capris below your ass crack and a sideways NY Hat you will pick up the hottest, naive little witches who think you're a dealer.
The fear of happiness struck a chord for me. It seems like any time a situation started to go too well for me, the self-sabotage circuit would kick in again and find a way to make it backfire.
Im very much used to the 69 curse. Every time something good is happening, Im expecting something bad to happen eventually to even things out. It never fails. Im not meant to have meaningfull life.
neonappl3_ honestly that quote is bullshit bc that basically says that all bc you have low self esteem or hate yourself or have a mental illness that makes you hate yourself you don’t deserve to be in a relationship unless you get rid of that which is hard to get rid off. That quote does more harm than good
For the longest time I tried understanding why I couldn't find a healthy relationship and was more often than not falling/ attracting toxic ones. For a while I thought the back and forth, chase and constant arguments was part of a passionate dynamic... perhaps passionate for a moment but not substantial for long-term. Now I'm in a healthy relationship and I often reflect on what I have today that I didn't have back then. This video is definitely an eye opener and make me better understand who I was in the past so I don't make those same confusing mistakes again.
Reasons I am single: 1. I'm ugly 2. I'm an introvert 3. My crush doesn't like me back 4. Nobody likes me If someone thinks my self-esteem is low, you are wrong, it doesn't exist
except for no. 2 and the last one, i completely agree. I've been in one relationship 5 years ago and that is the reason I have massive trust issues. And my capability to show emotions to anyone is crippled, so even if I do find somebody, they'll have a hard time to feel my love because I cant express it. Big yikes, my love future is looking great....
The trauma gets me. I try not to let it "follow" me or become a part of me, but it is a mess I can't escape. I come from a hard family life and sometimes, it even effects school and my safety. I am fascinated by the idea of someone actually loving me for, me. Not perfect me, not fake me, no strings attached, just me. But for a reason I can't answer, I'm still here with no one. It's not the worst but I'm terribly afraid of being alone after some messed up stuff. I also don't throw out my family trauma all in one spot of everyone, I keep it away, and try to be optimistic. But apparently in high school, no one wants that either lol. I still have a long journey ahead of me, and I hope one day someone can love me the way everyone should be loved. Unconditionally.
Reasons for me: 1. Too shy 2. Too many fears/insecurities about relationships 3. Way too busy with hobbies 4. No idea where to meet new people (and even if I knew, straight back to point 1) I came to the conclusion it's better to stay single and remain who I am...today relationships are all about drama, mistrust and ending up in hurting each other...I can really go without those things
Wait a minute….there’s a perfect couple right here! Two shy people…(plot twist) they’re expecting a shy baby because I’m late w my jokes…nah bless u guys
Ye, I have the same problems as you. But one day, I said to myself that I have to stop focusing on things I can’t control, and from then on I started working on myself a lot. Worked hard at school, studied a lot, workout, work at nights. It patched a big hole in my life, and in the future, it’s gonna be very rewarding
Why I'm single: •Still dealing with the passing of my lover •Regaining my confidence •The desire for romance comes and goes •Can feel wrong for having feelings with someone different.
With the exception of unrealistic high standards, not learning from mistakes, and not trusting my partners, I hate to say this list really summed me up. Ever heard that expression, "You are your own worst enemy"? Self-sabotage is what I do best!
If u have strict parents , it means you are young to live with your parents .... And that means that u r not old enough to get in a relationship which will matter
X-PLAYER 59 true but I still think it’s possible for a kid/teen to find love. I mean I started developing strong feelings for people when I was 13. I felt like I was the only person in my class that actually understood people’s emotions and feelings. Most kids/teens aren’t ready for the responsibility though
No. You may be demisexual. Thats a sign. But demisexuals only fall in love or get attracted once they have a close bond or a emotional bond with someone. Meaning your really close to them and care about them before you start getting romantic feelings for them or wanting to go on a date.
I can't even imagine my future relationship or marriage and having a kids. I think I dont need love to live on life. And also I'm just too independent to dont need a partner. Is there anyone same as my thinking?
@Rollie55 hell same, I used to become "Lonely" but as time passed I realized that I grew up by being alone and I think that's what really the happiness I have
Owl Official I thought exactly like you when I was single. But it all changed rapidly when I‘ve met my boyfriend. It becomes so real. 🙃 And he is also the person where I can only imagine to marry and have children with him someday. I was also used to be alone before. Don‘t get me wrong I was completely fine with it. I could habe many guys before but I didn‘t want it, because it never felt right. Since the right one appeared, it‘s like the top cherry on a tasty cake. 😋 the life was nice as a single before and now he makes my life even better. 🙂
@@laluma6890 my friends also said that maybe my future soulmate can change my thinking. And also if I learned to release my bottled emotions I can experience what they call "Love" but Idk how. Probably, my self might change by time.
I've seen so many relationships that looked healthy and strong falling apart right before my eyes (my own experience included). So yeah, it's hard not to be slightly cynical now.
Why I’m single (at 27): 1. High standards (that match so seems reasonable to me) 2. Everyone I like ends up being married or taken or don’t reciprocate 3. Societal cultural norms 4. Of course, a global pandemic (hate online stuff at this point in my life)
Yup its always every friend has a wife and girlfriend but they don't have any single friends NOT EVEN UGLY single friends 🤣😂 it's so dry out there that land whales and single moms think they are entitled to a doctor/ceo husband or prince charming😑 yup future of dating sucks .....thank you feminism
@@philipreisler3323 too lazy to try to find an explaination for something ? Blame it on feminism ! Your cheap scapegoat for everything you think is wrong in this world ! Already tried and tested by 3349673 people in the comment section, and my uncle during a family meeting.
I needed this, I was stuck in both hurt and resentment from a past failed crush confession back in high school and I have from the longest time used that as an excuse for not seeking a new relationship due to the fear of rejection and making myself emotionally vulnerable.
Reason why I'm single. I choose to be, simple as that. A lot of people in our current timeline are NOT relationship material, so I've simply given up on trying to look. I prioritize my own happiness over my desire for a relationship that probably won't even last.
I’ve never been in a relationship before. Now that I’ve entered my mid-20s I’m too afraid to get into a relationship. Everyone’s so experienced from the get go nowadays and it makes me feel like I’d be insufficient as a partner.
@@Barbar-barbaro I also have reasons for having low self esteem and in bad times I really do act like that. But usually I have rather healthy confidence... despite all the sh*t I've been through. What reasons you have btw?
You can learn to love or at least accept yourself over time. I also got from absolutely hating myself to accepting/liking myself. You don't have to be perfect, you're enough as you are now.
From someone who had the problem of too low standards, do not settle. It’s significantly better to be single than be with someone who does not meet your standards. There’s a balance between having too high standards vs. not enough.
Here's why I think I'm single: 1. I wasn't prepared for social situations - thanks sheltered childhood 2. I'm very cynical about love, because I've been burned consistently over the years. An acquaintance of mine said I was "married to my misery" - and that hit hard. 3. I run away from any potential embarrassment, especially if it's public. 4. I've become paranoid when someone appears to show interest in me - I assume it's a trick or a scam or start looking for hidden cameras that are recording me being a sucker which will be shown to me for eternity with Nelson Muntz's laugh as the soundtrack. 5. One hundred percent low self-esteem. Nine times out of ten I genuinely hate myself. 6. A genuine worry that I'd be far too clingy and drive someone away. 7. I think my genuine personality isn't attractive - which is why I hide it behind an icy exterior of professionalism. Thankfully I'm in therapy. But it's very difficult.
Don't let these assholes sell the lie of self love. You have every right to have low self esteem. The world hurt you. Don't let those idiots gaslight you over your very real experiences that gave you your low self-esteem. It is the world that needs more love, and needs to give more love, you don't need to do crap that only enforces your feelings of inadequacy.
@@CowToes ur right, the world needs more love. But thats not an excuse not to work on yourself to try to overcome your insecurities and live a happy life. Ur telling him to be stuck on the past and not let go of it
1 - yep 2 - Been burned 4x after my divorce, two were her, two were me. Interestingly, my ex-wife and I remain good friends. Likely, during my self imposed exile and isolation, she’s prolly my best friend at the moment. Anyway, I very much want a loving, trusting relationship again.
What keeps me from getting into a relationship: ⇝I’m an introvert and only have one friend. ⇝I’m ugly as fuck. ⇝I’m too scared to talk too anyone who isnt my best friend. ⇝I’m usually always ignored. ⇝My parents. ⇝I’m too rude/insensitive/aggressive (according to some people.) ⇝I’m literally scared of relationships. ⇝When I do develop a crush on someone I deny it and push them away.
I used to be like you then i learnt to put on a mask. Whatever you do don’t learn putting on the mask, it’s far worse than what you’re going through right now. You’re fine just the way you are, don’t degrade yourself, be confident in wht you look like and who you are.
1. Being an introvert doesnot mean you arenot social just that you need time away from people sometimes. Also having only 1 friend can be good i for example can say that i have only 2 friends but they are probably the best people i can be with in my situation. You should probably try to stick with that one friend and not neglect him. 2. I am quite uncertain at times how thats relevant :D i honestly dont think you are ugly if it really bothers you you can switch up some things about your looks. I believe i had the same feeling at some point but since then i changed up my hairstyle. One tip to bear with it for now is just tell yourself that you look nice whenever you end up near a mirror dont dwell on it but like just say it momentarily and move on! 3. I was also very scared of talking but then i realised that most people really didnot want to talk to me. I made a mistake of paying too much attention to people who were already in an established group of friends. One guy in particular was very friendly with everyone and i'd consider him a friend if we had a chance to talk some more (with quarantine going on its pretty hard). Another girl i talked to and got fairly close with i found by little to no effort me and my two friends just kinda had enough in common with her that we clicked effortlessly. Basically my recomendation is do not look to people who ignore you and talk to your best friend more often chances are he/she is the best friend you can have in the entire class. 4.you are usually ignored? Well i think that can mean a good thing because being ignored is a sure good way of saying "i dont wanna be friends with you" thats good because they dont make you uncertain in their intentions. If you really want to have someone else to talk to i recommend observing your classmates who do they talk to? Do they frequent same couple of people? Well in that case it might be hard for you to talk to them. If you find someone else who talks to either everyone or no one that means A they are highly friendly with everyone which means you cant try to talk with them B they prefer to be alone but you can still give it a shot. C they are a criminal this is a half true joke. If you feel like you cant talk with any of them consider asking your friend to get to know them so he can introduce you two and kinda set you up for a bit of a friendship. 5. Well i have been talking about friends all this time so i have nothing to say about your parents keeping you from dating someone. But i wanna assure you that its best you have realiabe people around you so you dont end up with someone manipulative and get trapped with them. 6. I dont know who tells you that but considering your comment in brackets you dont think you are rude in which case you should be confident in the fact that you arenot so. But beware for if someone close to you says this you should probably pay attention to them and see if you did something wrong. 7.its ok to be scared of relationships you just gotta make sure that when the time comes and you start having a crush on someone you dont shy away from their advances or youe own possible advances. Make sure that fear doesnot consume you and if it helps ask your friend(s) for help. 8.enjoy having crushes i did this myself too i realised that the person i had acrush with really wasnot interested and we werenot compatible. One thing i can tell you is just be honest with her/him and try to not deny them. Consider going up to them the previous advices were kind of a training for that. If he/she ignores you dont give into obsession and just get away from them see if you two align you cant jump into action straight ahead you gotta befriend him/her first. I hope this at least helps a bit and good luck remember one thing do not give one damn about others opinions of you its theirs and they can keep it(obviosuly unless they are your friends in which case think it over discuss it and solve the problem).
I know my issue when I happened to get to the point of talking for month with a guy was I lost myself in them. I strayed from things that normally would make me happy or that I would do. Obsessing. I've gotten better thankfully. But usually the guys would ghost me. I wouldn't talk about myself non-stop, I'd actually ask them about their self. But now, I'm single still, because of a lack of confidence and self-esteem. I've been growing in my self-esteem though.
I also think it's important not to mistake red flags for "imperfections". Settling isn't good either. Don't expect the other person to be perfect, but don't ignore the warning signs. Too many people settle just so they won't be alone. Singleness is a gift: an opportunity to become the best you can be so when you find a match, you already have your identity.
I say this (or at least think) so many times! People often stop looking for a good partner, because they think "it could be worse". And they end up being in unsatisfying or even toxic relationship, just to get a "family they wanted". It's a 21st century. If you want children, you can have them without a partner, but if your partner is not right for you, that's not the "family" you want.
Ye I get what ur saying my friends think the boy I like is a red flag 🚩 but I just don’t see that if u know what I mean I don’t really get that from him I think he’s the right person at this point I don’t know what to do I told him I liked him haven’t heard anything from him since but I don’t think there’s anything bad there or whatever pls help me xx
@@elisha-jayne3236 you should look inwards then. Start by doing research on yourself. Why did you find him attractive? Go full psychoanalysis on it. You can Google it too. Sounds like the guy you like is emotionally unavailable. You can google "why are emotionally unavailable people toxic" and "why am I attracted to emotionally unavailable people". You may have a hero complex that also makes you like them. Just do research of yourself. You'll realize you probably don't even like that guy, you just liked what he could of potentially become
There’s a great video called ‘why are we all so lonely’ about how being single isn’t a bad thing and you shouldn’t feel pressured to be in a relationship because it’s “healthy”. Not that I think this video is bad, it’s very accurate but I think being proud to be single and independent should be empowered more
Reasons why I'm single that none of my friends are willing to admit to me: 1. My standards are somewhat high. It's not a complete con tho. I know what I want and don't want from a relationship. I'm looking for long term not a short fling, might as well be "picky". 2. I can come off as intimidating. I dress and live my life how I want to. I'm authentic with myself and not everybody likes that for various reasons. But I don't want to be with someone who doesn't accept who I am as a person. 3. I'm quite reserved and quiet. I'm not about noise or being chatty. I'm not interested in talking to just talk. Which can make it harder for others to initiate a conversation with me or it makes me seem closed off and uninterested. I'm trying to get better at having good conversations with others though. 4. I'm hesitant to try new things alone. I was never the type to want to do something new alone, it makes me feel awkward. So when I try something new it has to be with friends, but it also might intimdate someone who wants to approach me. So I miss out on a lot of opportunities to meet new ppl. 5. I'm okay being single. I don't have the desire to rush into a relationship. I take my time with that aspect in my life. So for others it seems like I have bad luck or something, but I'm just enjoying my life in the current. And if I'm single in the current that's ok, my happiness isn't reliant on if I'm in a relationship or not.
I was with someone amazing for 5 years, married for 3.5. We're getting divorced now. I think I did every single thing wrong, so much so that I'm pretty sure all 10 behaviors here were things that I constantly did. I don't know how I messed up so bad and how I never learned from my mistakes for the past 5 years (#10 in the video). Everything seems so obvious now when everything is too late. Hindsight really is 20/20 and it's the worst feeling ever to know you had so much time to come to a realization and to fix things, only to never end up doing it and procrastinating until it's unfixable and undeniably over. And knowing I did it all to myself and to my wife. It doesn't make it any better when everyone just keeps telling you to learn from your mistakes now and move on.
You rarely see this openness to own failures. Mostly it's ppl blaming their exes. You're doing great, maybe you don't know it yet. Just keep reflecting yourself. Wish you all the best luck.
Gosh, that hit hard. Bro, you describe pretty much exactly what I'm going through, too. You realise all you mistakes. But it's over and everything done is unfixable. As you said, you learn for your future, but this doesn't really help here. You destroyed not only your own happiness but also the life of one person you love(d). Is there anything you would tell your 7 months younger self now?
I truly believe I've given up on relationships. I fear being hurt again. Yet I also fear dying alone. I'm stuck in an infinite loop of "I wish I had someone and didn't feel so lonely" and "I'm too much of a loser so it's no wonder nobody wants me."
Hey slackerofhell, I hope you read this. You are worth it. It will take time for you to accept the past and come to good terms with your inner scars but know this: You need to talk to someone that is qualified to tell you why and/or how you feel a certain way. Don't let your inner demon tell you whats right or wrong, he will always try to talk you down from what you want. You are loved by people and there will always be someone for you out there... I hope you are doing good and feel better. Keep your chin up, things do get greater!
@@slevinhyde3212 Fck that man I was with someone a month ago and thought we would be together for awhile I don't come across this feeling very often only like 2 or 3 times in the last 5.5 years. Just don't man.
Ppl who give up on relationships too soft and think ppl can't be replaced smh DONT GET ATTACHED TO NO TREESH BRO MAKE THAT GIRL SUBMIT send em to doonie land in the doonie van
Over the years, I’ve realized that single-hood is not the “boogey man” that society and most religions tried to convince us it was. Also, why does “finding the right person” need to be such a high priority? Fall madly, desperately in love with yourself and focus on your own self-improvement. Then, if you decide to “couple-up,” it won’t be from a place of emotional lack or dependence.
I think the 'person that completes you' does not necessarily have to be the person you marry, you sleep with, or are in a romance with. sometimes platonic relationships can be fulfilling too, it's better to build a solid base than to run from relationship to relationship. I have no desire for a life partner at the moment and I am pretty happy with how my life is.
@@velvety2006 That is true that some friendships can really be fulfilling but they don t answer to some needs that are more physical. The need to have endorphines, ocytocine and dopamine can not be fulfilled by platonic relations.
In this day and age I have very little faith in people actually wanting to find love until they are old and used up. It seems most people just want to "have fun" instead of finding anyone. That's why I'm single. I don't think it's worth being in a relationship if nobody wants to actually find love. I don't want to be a meal ticket and I dont want to play dumb games
That's not why you're single, that sounds like a cheap excuse :) There's more than 7+ billion people on this planet and probably millions of people in your own country. If you are generalizing everyone you meet and you aren't open minded then of course you're not gonna find someone who shares your interests. Can't find something if you aren't looking for it mate. No one said it will be easy and the first person you meet will click with you instantly. It might take some effort and time but if you're persistent in your goals, then it's absolutely guaranteed that you will achieve them! Good luck brother and lots of love to you
![เจ็บที่ยังฮัก - ม่อน วรวิทย์ [ Official Mv ] จอนนี่มิวสิค](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/KALIGSRSjFs/mqdefault.jpg)
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Can you not call me out for one minute
Hi :)
When you’re broke 💀
They’re beautiful!!
@@echfx9201 Thank you!! :)
The problem is, I'm not in love with anyone, but I'm in love with the idea of being in a relationship
Yesyesyesyes,finally someone understands. I thought I was weird bc I’ve never been in love in my life but would like to be in a relationship like wth
Peri Uluırmak not necessarily. I’ve never been in a relationship bc I see no point in on wir it’s not genuine
It's same to me
Yeah
Gosh me too
Why I am single
1. I don't leave my house, nor talk to anyone of the opposite sex.
Thank you for coming to my Ted talk
@@babylilylolxd6807 how's that a stereotype?
@@babylilylolxd6807 sexuality isn’t a choice lmao. usually i’d say this to a homophobe but you’re implying that anyone can just “switch” and go date someone of the same sex, even if they’re straight. you might not be straight but they are, doesn’t mean it’s a stereotype.
Don't blame yourself cuz there's a freaking pandemic out there.
@@babylilylolxd6807 It is his / her choice to be with the opposite sex. Most people are straight, that's a fact.
@@babylilylolxd6807 I know but since they said "opposite sex" I assume they are straight
I’ve lived through more pandemics than relationships💖
Me too
And I lived only one pandemic
😭
You guys have relationships?
@@johnbarney8748 I don't
The "scared of happiness" part is so personal for me. I'm so scared whenever I make some progress with people I like because I think they are going to hate me once they see what I really am. I feel more comfortable when they are distant to me, that way, I won't feel the pain of them pushing away when we are close.
I relate so much to this
Goddamm u wrote my situation down. Being scared of happines is soo fu*ked up....
i agree, i'm always stuck with the constant fear that i'll just get too happy and then the most tragic event is just building up on me and will just hit me out of nowhere and affect my mental state.
Reasons i'm single:
1. I rarely leave the house
2. Socially awkward
3. Stuttering
4. Fear of being manipulated/betrayed again
same lmk if u find a solution for any of them
The implication you’ve been in a relationship already e.e
I completely understand reason number 4. Betrayal is a difficult thing to overcome when it happens more than once.
im always doing something outside, but alone, 50% of the time im on camps, the other 50% im eating at a food outlet. But staying home with a s/o is really amazing. Ive experienced it, and its great, but im single now, and food is bae 😂😂
Exactly me
Better to be alone than with someone and feel alone.
Anyone who has been married knows the pain of this!
I think it was more like "it's better to be lonely by yourselves than being lonely in a relationship"
R.i.p. Robin Williams.
@@piyushsharma3991 true
True
1. You have cynical views about love
2. Unrealistic standarts
3. You've set too many dealbreakers ( expecting too much )
4. Unresolved past trauma
5. Low self esteem
6. You have a fear of happiness
7. Trust issues
8. You think you lose your independence when being in a relationship
9. You want someone you can't or shouldn't have
10. You don't learn from your mistakes
Thank you 💜
all check! :')
In short, that's entirely your fault.
5 and 9
Past Trauma, Trust issues, Im also kinda socially Dumb ._.
I'm a 33-year-old male and never had a date or anything. This pain of loneliness throughout time hurt so much I almost made the worst mistake anyone could do. Now, I've realized I believed the false beliefs that I was unworthy of love. Making it to where I wouldn't even give myself a chance. Now Im trying to work on myself and change those beliefs. Hopefully, things will change within time.
That depends on your "other", there is little you could ever do to influence that. People suck and will always let you down and prove your cynicism correct.
I'm hitting 30 year mark soon and I'm lonely too without any romantic relationship experience. Used to think about my misery while being addicted to different drugs past 10 years. But suddenly realised it so much easy to make a new contacts with anybody just being straight honest about yourself, joking about your flaws to make 'em your strenghts. Somehow I find myself really unintirested in finding that special one, because I feel independent and too much confident. Wanna be with someone, who's basically reflection of me. But there are some big fault. I'm introverted, and it seems I'm easy to go, but it takes a lot of energy to make it happen. Also I was scamming people, and find myself manipulative, which makes me weak geniunely. So I rather be single, because I won't harm anybody, who is pure and sincere, on the other hand, I demolish immature and weak people with honestly spoken word, and there were no one smarter than me to kick my ass for this. Maybe it happen sometime, but I can honestly say the devilish truth about myself without any doubt or fear. I'm way too much destructive typo, dunno what to do about this. And this is nasty. I don't feel shame or anger, I feel nothing, when somebody strong and good tries to hit me in weak spot. I'm ready to take the hit and absorb the damage. I'm who I am. Strong and confident of being such a bad human. I just never came over border of intimacy. Never feeling fear, only realizing I'm a dangerous one for someone purehearted.
I'm a 33 year old woman and had one relationship which was barely an experiment to experience things. And trust me, if it's not the right person, it's more of a liability than an achievement. The sexual things aren't worth it if you don't like them. You want to receive love but you also want to enjoy the company of the other one. It's no fun if it's one sided.
I feel that bro honestly I do. Be you and never change, know that you matter man. 🤛🏼
@@soil80 Ayo, you guys should hook up.
“you have a low self esteem”
well you are goddamn right about that-
ayo samee
No one likes K-pop stans. Start there.
mood.
I know people in a relationship who don't have a good self-steem...
And they seem pretty sad, even if they have a gf/bf
Love yourself
What keeps me single:
1. I don't go out of my house even before the quarantine
Social distancing ever since. 😎
Sounds about right.
Not even after quarantine lmao
Go to coffee shops and parks. I’ve been meeting people through this
@@vassiliospavlou8571 my social skills aren't the greatest, i'll give it a try though
I think one biggest issue is that people often believe that being in a relationship can solve all their problems. It won't. It certainly is magical but if you're counting on someone else to change your life, it would become toxic
I definitely agree
@@Zipperskull_ Thank You
That happened to me
Yeah, I feel everyone should try to find happiness within themselves before anyone else. Not saying you have to be completely enlightened within yourself, but at least trying puts a better perspective on how a relationship may be; compared to a dependant relationship that has an unhealthy expectation one may have for their partner, I feel.
@@InVinoVeratas Yes. Absolutely
Aside from the fact that I can never have my crush, it's the fear of losing independence for me. I've been single all my life and I've gotten so used to it. It's so empowering yet scary.
You won't know until you try, right? The best way to get over fears is to face them head-on.
A healthy relationship is a union of two individuals growing together and sharing their lives. A lover should be an addition to your already established life. You can be independent and be committed to someone at the same time. Communicating with your partner what constitutes your independence will allow you to preserve it and help them respect it, or you'll realize you're incompatible and break it off before both of you get too invested in it.
There is some degree compromise to this, if independence for you means I can do what I want whenever I want without any regard towards my partner's thoughts and feelings, then yeah you're gonna have to work on learning how to accomodate and balance your life so there is room for yourself and your desires as well as your partner's. But those compromises are usually pretty small in the grand scale of things. Your life shouldn't look much different from what it was when you were single. Usually, the biggest difference is that you willingly give up the freedom to mess around sexually and emotionally with other people. Those things are reserved for your partner.
I've been single all my life too, I just haven't fallen for anyone, nor has anyone fallen for me
I have been single all my life too. I would like to have someone but I like my life the way it is
Ive been single my entire life too, i had a huge crush on this girl for 5-6 years, the split second i even laid eyes on her in 2015 i feel in love, she was my first crush & my first time ever feeling that. I never made any moves on her as i knew i had no chance with her & i knew she would say no anyway. I lost that feeling in 20/21 anytime i see her now i dont feel anything & im like “whatever idc”. I wish i could get rid of that feeling of love toward people its an annoyance, no girl irl has even spoke to me within the last 4 years. I hate being with people i only want to be alone but for some reason i just want a relationship, i get the feeling usually when im super bored which is pretty much every second of the day
Your crush isn't ready and will never be too ?
9. You want someone you can’t or shouldn’t have.
*Silently realizing that 90% of my crushes are fictional characters*
Lmao can relate 😂😂
That one was a real kick in the balls for me.
or celebrities
I want zero two to exist
100% of my crushes are celebrities two or three times my age 🥴
0:37 You have cynical views about love
1:07 You have unrealistically high standards
1:37 You have too many dealbreakers
2:08 You have unresolved past trauma
2:40 You have low self-esteem
3:16 You fear fulfillment
3:56 You have trust issues
4:22 You think a relationship makes you lose independence
5:00 You want someone you can't or shouldn't have
5:25 You don't learn from your mistakes
all of that is cope. Its all about your face
@@nogymforyourface49 There's a lot of both data and examples that disagree with that. Some people are mangled in accidents and still find love. If a bombastically hot guy asked me out but he had the list in the timestamps, I would turn him down.
I think I'm all of that. but I am working on myself
A true hero
Thank you brave soldier
*"its easy to fall in love with the wrong people"*
*boi that hit.*
It's only slightly more difficult to figure out the difference between actual Love and a lustful crush. ;o)
Oh yea ur an kpop fan So u basically love in wrong ppl
@@yeetthephone2341 well Im not a kpop fan. How can u say that?
@@Jackgritty28 Worse still, they often prevent relationships from even getting off the ground. People meet and end up having such bad impressions of each other they cancel each other out immediately without having ever known who that person really is. Sometimes all it takes its just one small faux-pas and that's it. Game over.
th-cam.com/video/HteuuKwcz34/w-d-xo.html
Thanks for confirming that I will truly be forever alone.
Exactly
Welcome to the club, want some wine?
@@tomaskatinas1796 If it's white wine then yes, red wine gives me migraine.
It's not your imperfections. It's their legalism.
😂😂😂
Reasons I’m single:
1. Low self-esteem
2. Overthinks
3. Negative mindset about myself
And the cycle goes on
SAmE
Love yourself first before loving others, that’s all i can say.
Sad highfive
@@Andrea-wq5xq if only it were that easy
"How's your love life?"
It doesn't exist.
No worries! We have just the right solution for you. Coming to you through app soon ;)
@@Psych2go what is that app
Same here man
Damn..
I’m avoiding it
Why I'm single:
-being cringe and awkward
-strict parents
-shy
I've never seen anyone else calling themself cringe lol
Same but without strict parents
Same
Basically me except for the strict parent
Pusheeennnnn
24, never dated anyone, I think the more important thing than going out to find a date is to find your own crew, the people you feel super comfy with. Build your confidence and shine, opportunities will be attracted to you.
I’m dating my pillow, we always sleep together. And pillow always comforts me
Who can relate?
👇🏻
Me
Me
"No no hes got a point"
I am the Cool Side Of The Pillow..yours very truly Alfonso Cantu
Me hahaha
:(
Reasons to being single
1. Social media ruins relationships
2. Havent met anyone who cant take a break from their phone
3. Now a days people would rather find someone new than fix a problem in a relationship
My guy, you should probably speak in english because people rarely understand the language of facts.
4. Being able to see the problems in society only makes one unattractive to all those 99% of people unable to accept reality
The last one is so true! My classmate had already 6 or 7 boyfriends (and she wasn't that affected)
5. dating apps like tinder and bumble ruined the dating scene as women are always looking to job hop relationship once something better comes along.
Same
This TH-cam algorithm has a funny sense of humor.
this is outrageous, youtube
yEs
Indeed...
They known you better, than you think !
Everytime I need it, it pops up HAHAHAHA
My reasons-
-Overthinking
-Being deathly afraid of rejection
-What his friends might think of me, as I see them every day (suffice to say, I think this might be a reason for everyone with a crush)
-Being disorganized and awkward
Lots of etcetera afterwards. It really isn't an exhaustive list, unfortunately. I wish everyone the best in their endeavors of confession and whatnot.
In the same boat brother
fr
Same
Fr
Yep
Short summary on
Why you were single
1. you had cyinical view on love
2. You set unrealistic standered
3. You've set too many deal breakers
4. you have unresolved past trauma
5. You have low self esteem
6. you have a fear of happiness
7. You have trust issues
8. You think you will lose your independent by being in relationship
9. You want some you can't or shoul'd
10. You don't learn from mistakes
Damn. I feel called out with like half of this list...
Thank you
Thanks mate
Damn I’m really relating to 7 points
😂😂😂I do not learn from mistakes at all lmao
Why I'm single:
I'm awkward, weird, quiet, have a kind of dark humor etc
Let's talk
Dammit Ileana, you beat me to it
@@kw267 🤷
Yeahh me too. I’m also shy a lot of the time. I wonder what people think of shy people. Like I feel like they think we are just there sitting in the corner when in reality My brain is going at it and I’m just constantly thinking about stuff. I want to be more social and talk to people other then my little friends I have. Ahhh antisocial problems🤷♀️😔🤜🤛
Same bro, same!
We need to stop pressuring people that aren’t mature or ready into being in a relationship. Focus on being happily single.
@Mr Man probably because it's biologically necessary for our race and society to survive and have families which build sense of community. You are programmed to have something to fight for build for etc..if most of us were single it would be a very selfish society but I could be wrong
SavoryBaby
No. It’s not necessary for humans to have families. It can be as simple as communities, but no *need* to be any more intimate.
Yes, we are programmed to have something to fight for, it’s ourselves. We, *instinctively*, fight for our own selves.
Ironically, overpopulation has become a global problem now. Too many people in this world wants to have a family and what does that lead to? Competition for limited resources. Don’t you think it’s selfish that one family’s happiness can be ruined (poverty) by another’s family in search of their own happiness? No?
SavoryBaby
You are wrong. 😂😂😂
Humans aren‘t „programmed“, we have feelings, desires...we are INDIVIDUALS first of all! ☝🏼
The point of the video is that we need to improve ourselves before we can be successful in relationships...I hope you understand that.
It has nothing to do with maturity. It has to do with allowing people to live their lives. Period.. it's their choice if they want to be in a relationship or not.
Reasons:
1. Too shy due to isolation during childhood thanks to overprotective parents who never taught me the essentials about socializing.
2. Overprotective with people due to the first point and also due to past trauma and negative experiences with people.
3. Not feeling connected to most people because I am very different from modt of them
4. Low self esteem
5. Fear of rejection
6. Too uncomfortable around many people due to social anxiety
Reasons I'm single (quite a long list):
- I'm shy around women who I find attractive.
- I have drastic mood changes from feeling like the coolest dude alive to self loathing and insecurity (wether its about my personality, looks or habits).
- Fear of making the same mistakes I did in my past relationships.
- *Overthinking* (wether its about the future, fear of possible arguments etc.).
- My crushes tend to ignore me in social situations and I struggle trying to fit in sometimes.
- My crushes talk to almost everyone but me and like the paragraph above, I have trouble approaching them.
first, second (mood wise), fourth, and the last one i can relate too a lot
I am the same way with guys I am romantically or sexually attracted to, shy, I just try to remember that guys aren't objects or beings to fear. I do have my issues too but even the guy next door does too.
Welcome to the club.
I’m in this comment and I don’t like it
I’m literally the same bro😭
"You set unrealistic standards."
My standards:
-Has a pulse
Lmao
no puls also works
dear Fbi this is a joke
"I mean, they don't even need teeth. We smile from the heart"
My only standard: " loyalty loyalty loyalty"
My standards:
1. Is at least 18, mentally and physically
2. Is human
The pulse is overrated.
“You have low self esteem.”
*guess I’m going to be single forever.*
Mine died a long time ago and I keep it that way, it's better not caring about it.
I understand you, it’s really hard to let go of that, I’m still going through that process at this moment but one day, no matter how long you will love yourself :)) I know it’s a long process that seems to be not going nowhere but it will you just got to you trust yourself and be patient
I was thinking the same thing, even on real life a lot of people thought me that is basically my fault because I have low self-esteem. So basically the reason why i can't get a girlfriend it's because me as a human i have doubts and it's my fault because i need to be 100% confident on every things i do even if it's something that is gonna be dangerous or destroy my social reputation... We're not robots... We make mistakes and sometimes we keep remembering this mistakes and that's ok because we are not gonna make them again... Everytime someone says this to me i get really angry I'm not joking... I understand the point, part of get to know someone that you like is judging but again we are not robots...
I have low self esteem because I'm very skinny...
Other guys always tell me to eat more and work out. Even tho I literally eat TONS and do as much martial art-training as I can, my body doesn't change.
I'ts kinda unfair because I think I don't even look bad but others are ruining everything without even knowing it.
And now my parents expect me to ask out a girl? I'm sorry what? If I asked out a girl she'd probably tell me she doesn't like skeletons or some shit 💀
My dad was mad af because I said I can't talk to girls...I'm just thinking even if I had high self esteem, that doesn't make me a bodybuilder. I'm still a skeleton, it is what it is :/ I feel sorry for disappointing my dad
@@RL-DarkSpark Keep in mind your health is important so if you are skinny but you are very healthy it doesn't really matter...Keep in mind people are just gonna suggest... don't worry too much what they are gonna say...if someone catches your eyes but everyone else say that you are not worth it for her...well do it anyway prove them wrong , be yourself don't try anything crazy. I suggest if your parents are mad at you because you don't have a girlfriend to simply say the truth, explain yourself...i know it's crazy but maybe one day you're gonna meet someone you like and if your friends are not gonna help...well your parents will absolutely help by suggesting what to do.
For my entire 19 years of life, I’ve never even had a “crush”, I never even looked at someone in a romantic way until a few months ago. I’ve met someone who really cares about me and makes me laugh, it’s crazy because I’ve never thought id feel this way-there’s always several people out there for you, just let them come to you and try not push relationships.
Thank u so much!! I’m almost 17 and just can’t have a crush on anyone, I was kind of afraid that I would never love someone, but your comment cheered me on! Good luck with your guy😁
im you, but she doesnt like me back, is already in a relationship with someone who is just "enough" and.. she has way too much emotional baggage to deal with, we have chemistry i like her a lot and care more about her than she does for herself, we argue all the time because we're both stubborn
I am a guy who turned 22 just 4 weeks ago and never had a girlfriend before and its kinda bothering me a lot. I use dating apps but rarely get matches by some 18-23 age girls who ends up ghosting or unmatching me for no reason. I had crush on 2 girls in my college few months ago. One was 19(20 now) and another was 20 or 21 and both rejected me.
I do chat with some girls on Instagram whom I knew in high school and they are all 20-22 year olds. I am having a very good chat with a girl who was 2 years my junior in our school days. Now she is 20 and I had the best chat with her for the past 3 days compared to any other girl who lives in my city. But I also like another girl who was my childhood friend when we were in elementary school in 2008-2011. Now she is 21 and only 5-6 months younger than me but we hardly chat much on IG as she doesn't reply to my last message for a week or 2.
@@filipesilva7581 I’m really sorry, I know what it’s like to have feelings for someone and them not feel the same, but a relationship should be fun and enjoyable! Sure you’ll have arguments but it should be a good balance between the two. Some people aren’t meant for each other and still fall in love. You’ll find someone that’s perfect for you one day, I promise :)
@@gillipoli5898 it’s so good it’s talked about! I felt so alone. Sometimes it just takes longer for other people to find their match, if I were you I wouldn’t worry, anyone would be lucky to have you as a partner 💪🏼 keep your head up
I love how this video assumes that there are queues of people wanting to date me that I keep rejecting for some reason. I'm single because literally no one is into me.
Same
Yup .it sucks being ugly
True
Same lmfao
same
If a dog gets constantly kicked, thrown rocks at or rejected by humans for seeking companionship, that dog learns that he is unwanted & all alone... & avoids humans altogether.
Not true.. Faith can be restored dog/human omeba (wuteva..)!! ✌
Don’t say that man. You have to be better than that!
@Humble Warrior My name is faith and i dont know how am i gonna react with that
Wow the truth in this
I am the dog
Being single isn't all that bad it just really sucks not having anyone to hug, kiss, talk to, care about, be cute with, and make each other happy. :(
*EDIT* HOLY HELL!! Thanks for all the likes I've never gotten so many :)
:* here a kiss for you
Pfff... Get yourself a pet ball python. You will have all the hugs you can handle.
Children can offer that as well
@@deltaradiance9034 There is nearly nothing more irresponsible than to bring an intelligent being into existence just for the need of a hug -_-
@@stretopovermind9680 who said it's just for the Need of a Hug??? Check yourself in the mirror. He/She mentioned, to kiss, talk to, CARE ABOUT, be cute with... SMH
Someone needs to see this but the fact you clicked on the video to better your relationship is already a good first step 🎉
“They say humans are social animals, they can't live alone. But you can live pretty well by yourself. I tell ya...instead of feeling alone in a group, it's better to have real solitude all by yourself.” - Faye Valentine
Cowboy Beebop i believe
Thank you. That is very true. _/\_
No, we cannot live alone. We need social interactions to retain our sanity.... Mine is long gone
Exactly. I find myself saner when alone in my thoughts than around Laura Bennie, my current girlfriend.
My favorite anime
Why I’m a single pringle:
1. My standards are high
2. I rarely leave my house or speak to other humans
3. I’m mentally dating an anime boy
Same 😭
I am wishing you and your anime boy a happy life together 🤣🤣🤣
I’m in this comment and I don’t like it
Ihu ! Lol
I felt this deeply 😭
"Relationships take more then one person"
There's my issue.
Same tbh
Truth!
Preach
So true ❤️ what if I'm single because low self esteem isn't mine... It's also relevant to the other side...
Mine too. I'm an accepting, secure, unconditional, non-measuring, non-judging and non-proving partner, but I keep picking partners who aren't. So, obviously, I still need to work on MY secure, self-love, self-valuing side. I'm a fixer, or enabler. I thought (and know) I was the right person, and I essentially am, though not perfect, but I kept picking partners who were not accepting; who were/are judging, blaming, shaming, emotional blackmailing, etc.
Here's the catch-22 part: I was willing to accept all that in them, and work on that, together, and individually, but they weren't willing to do that with me. I did trust, and my ideal partner is independent, secure, empathetic, accepting, etc. I was never clingy or needy or jealous. Not in my nature. I had a relatively secure childhood. I am a committed partner. My partners would all agree with this, and even verbally acknowledged this to my face, but I picked partners for whom few measure up. For them, the grass is always greener.
It doesn't matter how conscious, evolved, self-loving and self-valuing you are, with purpose and sense of self, if you pick the wrong partner...As Psych to Go says "Relationships take more than one person..." They also take an X-factor, otherwise known as luck. After 40 years in the trenches, I'm here to say that luck is HUGE. There are days when I am convinced it's 95% of whether or not we find/end up with the right partner. But that shouldn't keep us from waking up, being smarter, watching for red flags, asking the right questions, paying attention to their family and family history...
I always love the quote from the movie "Good Will Hunting," that Robin Williams' character says:
"You're not perfect, sport, and let me save you the suspense: this girl you've met, she's not perfect either. But the question is whether or not you're perfect for each other."
I just got rejected today but i 'm feeling good that i took the courage to confess and let him know that i like him because if i didn't confess to him it will become guilt so now i free from that
Getting attached is scary, because so many times in the past I've gotten attached to someone and they ended up hurting me. It's so, so hard for me to let my guard down.
Same :( it’s really lonely
Don´t let your guard down. It´s not worth the risk. People can´t be trusted, you can´t read minds, so the only person you can really 100% trust is you.
Relationships are not like in these retarded romantic movies. These movies have as much in common with reality as action movies have in common with real work of soldiers or policemen.
Yeah.. This is true..!! It just happens with me everytime I get attached to someone.. I am just scared of getting hurt again..
Letting your guard down isn't always a bad thing. People come in a slew of different varieties, and not all of them are inherently bad people. There are those bad apples who end up hurting you, but you'll always be able to find that person who's actually there for you, and not just themselves. Don't shut people out based on negative experiences in the past, you'll only hurt yourself and others more. Trust me, I've been there. Try and get to know someone for a while, and get to understand them. Open up little by little, not all at once. Just be yourself and try to place a little more faith in people. Hope this helped anyone reading. Take care of yourselves, and stay hydrated.
@@stereoraediova Thank you! That really helped
the fact that i LITERALLY just asked myself why I've never had a boyfriend and this shows up....
How many behaviors did you relate to?
Psych2go knows our problems
@@Psych2go 4 maybe 5 😬
@Psych2Go Ehm 3 or 4.... enough to stay single probably :P
Same
Why I’m single:
1. I’m ugly
2. I never leave my house
3. I hate everyone
4. I have a crush on a fictional character
5. I have no friends
Bonus: And I liked my own comment
You are not alone
Same.
First of all, many people seem to think or feel they're ugly - whether they are or not. That feeling's there, but it doesn't necessarily speak truth. (and in before something in you says "But I'm really ugly, you don't understand" - yes that's what the feels say in everyone who feels ugly - you're not alone in that :) ).
Also, it's my experience that how other people view you is more determined by your attitude and way of expressing than simple physical looks anyway =).
"I hate everyone" . Don't know what that is based on, but if you start looking for it, most people have at least something positive about them and that includes yourself. Regardless of what you may feel. If you practice looking for it, you'll start to see it more and more, which makes it easier to make friends, too. Doesn't mean you need to trust strangers or acquaintances blindly with everything, but you can start to gradually grow in trust.
Good luck finding happiness - everyone deserves that!
Beauty is subjective so you're not ugly
There's something refreshing about knowing I don't have any of these behaviors, but at the same time it's discouraging knowing I don't have any of these behaviors and still am single regardless.
That’s really understandable but forcing love to come to you ends you up in a toxic situation, letting love come to you naturally is the best way to go, there’s definitely someone out there for you, there is for everyone! Just live everyday as it is and let things come towards you instead of pushing it to come to you.
Why I'm single:
1. I'm an Introvert
2. I don't go out of my way to talk to new people.
3. I can't seem to identify if someone is flirting with me and I always assume they're just being nice.
4. I'm scared of getting my heart broken. I've been in relationships where I thought I was in love and they eventual broke up with me. I don't remember how being in love feels, but I remember the pain of heart break.
5. I have pretty low self esteem.
6. I think love is only true in fairy tales, good enough for some, but not for me.
Same here
Ohh, same in here... 😔
I relate to all except 4 and 6 as I've never even been in a relationship. I never go out of my way to meet new people unless circumstances force me to. I have no ability to flirt and am terrible at identifying if someone is flirting with me unless they're REALLY obvious about it, and even then, it can still take me a while to catch on.
As a 17 year old shy schoolboy, I haven't experienced having in relationship but I feel you and yes we are same situation right now
#6 🥺🥺🥺
1. Cynical views on love
2. Unrealistic standards
3. You have too many dealbreakers
4. You have unresolved issues
5. You have low self esteem
6. Fear of happiness - push people away
7. Trust issues and jealousy
8. Fear of losing your independence
9. You want someone you can't have
10. You don't learn from your mistakes
This looks definitely like a narc checklist for finding the next person to destroy.
All to new and familiar. I need more time to work on myself. I am getting better, though.
Thx you saved me 6 min
Sheesh each of these points felt like an arrow to the chest 😵
"too many dealbreakers" thats just called "having standards". Its WAY better to be single, than be with someone that doesnt make the cut.
"How's your love life?"
Nonexistent, thanks for asking
Gone,reduced to atoms
@Sultan Sahimbaev Chile man look at ur self ur also watching the video
This video explained things you shouldn’t do IN a relationship, not how to STOP being **single**, I do none of these behaviours listed in this video and still seem to struggle for totally different reasons, people literally always being already taken when I try to make a move, people not even wanting anything with me after I try to break the ice, honestly I thought I’d learn some mistakes I can avoid in this video but this didn’t help at all, it just shows that you have to be really lucky to get a partner in the first place
Why am I still single:
1. I can't get off my butt and do something about it.
Given the state of the world, that's suppose to be the best thing we all do. Doesn't help any of our lonely asses.
i too was cursed with a too comfy butt..
@brown power ranger I'm sorry, but I can't take someone seriously when they forget to capitalize the first letter on their words after a period. Also, no reason to be rude like that.
@brown power ranger Has someone with a cartoon picture been mean to you on the internet?
I stopped trying because people are too complicated these days.
“What mistakes have you made in your past relationships?”
Wouldn’t know, haven’t had any past relationships yet. :/
Keep it that way.
Not worth the hassle.
If u get horny - use prostitutes.
For everything else there is money too. So focus on what is Important to u.
afielsch Damn who hurt u??
Paola Elizabeth Morales he’s right my dude. Love, love is a myth.
@@paolaelizabethmorales8741 well, yes I got burnt more times than I care to admit.
But it is a general problem imo.
Ppl tend to fuck u over.
I had one and the mistake was I ever tried to date. It´s not worth the effort, it´s draining, time-consuming, complicated and potentialy dangerous.
1. You have cynical views about love
2. Unrealistic standards
3. Unresolved past trauma
4. Low self-esteem
5. You have a fear of happiness
6. You think you lose your independence when being in a relationship
7. You want someone you can't or shouldn't have
8.I am an introvert
I checked all those off lol even after years of improving myself. Still too much to deal with.
@@myrkflinn4331 You can only control yourself the other person can always mess things up too though so don't be so harsh on yourself.
5
@@myrkflinn4331 I think the most common one any intelligent man has is cynical views look at the type of dudes women go for..... try dressing in Capris below your ass crack and a sideways NY Hat you will pick up the hottest, naive little witches who think you're a dealer.
@@ichoosemysanity6467 it seems money does keep women around longer, but they'd still cheat I assume if you are at work half of your life
The fear of happiness struck a chord for me. It seems like any time a situation started to go too well for me, the self-sabotage circuit would kick in again and find a way to make it backfire.
Im very much used to the 69 curse. Every time something good is happening, Im expecting something bad to happen eventually to even things out. It never fails. Im not meant to have meaningfull life.
Why am I still single:
1. I am ugly as hell
That's it.
Same here
Not a reason, I am sure you arent ugly and love doesn't come from the outside, it's the inside which matters
Thank you for saying that
Not true, there are many things other than subjective beauty...you are probably poor, dumb and boring too! :D
U cute owo
Comments: “bold of you to assume I had a love life”
Me: “bold of you to assume I have a life”
Wow that’s kinda deep
*the more you know thing plays*
חחח חנקת😂😂
So.. are you a ghost then?
Yes it’s true
Them: "you can't love someone else if you don't learn to love yourself first"
Me: IM FOREVER SINGLEEEEE
They said that if someone loved you(friends or family),you will love yourself more
Remember there is someone who will always love you
don't Thinklike that
neonappl3_ honestly that quote is bullshit bc that basically says that all bc you have low self esteem or hate yourself or have a mental illness that makes you hate yourself you don’t deserve to be in a relationship unless you get rid of that which is hard to get rid off. That quote does more harm than good
You can't love someone ekze if you don't love yourself first
Me: Self Loathing Intesfies
Money will not leave you forever
For the longest time I tried understanding why I couldn't find a healthy relationship and was more often than not falling/ attracting toxic ones. For a while I thought the back and forth, chase and constant arguments was part of a passionate dynamic... perhaps passionate for a moment but not substantial for long-term. Now I'm in a healthy relationship and I often reflect on what I have today that I didn't have back then. This video is definitely an eye opener and make me better understand who I was in the past so I don't make those same confusing mistakes again.
Reasons I am single:
1. I'm ugly
2. I'm an introvert
3. My crush doesn't like me back
4. Nobody likes me
If someone thinks my self-esteem is low, you are wrong, it doesn't exist
oof
I can relate, except for that ugly part.
Keep your head up❤️💯
@@hugolundblad6036 People like me are I think the biggest fighters because it's really hard to be ugly and stupid. Its not cool to live like that.
noneone has gave u the permission to talk about life
Messy breakup ✔
Toxic relationship ✔
Childhood trauma ✔
Trust issues ✔
Low self esteem ✔
Love someone I cant have ✔
except for no. 2 and the last one, i completely agree. I've been in one relationship 5 years ago and that is the reason I have massive trust issues. And my capability to show emotions to anyone is crippled, so even if I do find somebody, they'll have a hard time to feel my love because I cant express it. Big yikes, my love future is looking great....
It's the toxic realashinship for me oo
Same
@@basicbitch7670 your profile is just...beautiful
Except for 2 everything is relatable :-!
“you’re in love with unavailable people” I WAS ATTACKED
Yeah such a horrible thing, you fall in love with a guy that happens to be married wtf😢
The trauma gets me. I try not to let it "follow" me or become a part of me, but it is a mess I can't escape. I come from a hard family life and sometimes, it even effects school and my safety. I am fascinated by the idea of someone actually loving me for, me. Not perfect me, not fake me, no strings attached, just me. But for a reason I can't answer, I'm still here with no one. It's not the worst but I'm terribly afraid of being alone after some messed up stuff. I also don't throw out my family trauma all in one spot of everyone, I keep it away, and try to be optimistic. But apparently in high school, no one wants that either lol. I still have a long journey ahead of me, and I hope one day someone can love me the way everyone should be loved. Unconditionally.
Reasons for me:
1. Too shy
2. Too many fears/insecurities about relationships
3. Way too busy with hobbies
4. No idea where to meet new people (and even if I knew, straight back to point 1)
I came to the conclusion it's better to stay single and remain who I am...today relationships are all about drama, mistrust and ending up in hurting each other...I can really go without those things
I agree with you. I am shy, myself.
Wait a minute….there’s a perfect couple right here! Two shy people…(plot twist) they’re expecting a shy baby because I’m late w my jokes…nah bless u guys
nahh broo im just like you but now i feel like i just need to face my fears and try to find someone :)
Ye, I have the same problems as you. But one day, I said to myself that I have to stop focusing on things I can’t control, and from then on I started working on myself a lot. Worked hard at school, studied a lot, workout, work at nights. It patched a big hole in my life, and in the future, it’s gonna be very rewarding
Reason for me:
Ugly
I stopped caring about relationships long ago. My mind isn't suited for them.
When was the last best relationship you had?
@@Psych2go 5 years ago. It only lasted for 4 months. I don't feel like I'm good enough or experienced enough, honestly.
@@atehdagreattie5966 Not really. Thank you for your concern..
@@atehdagreattie5966 hol up! Babe? Do you even know the person?
@@atehdagreattie5966 ok. How is your job like if you don't mind me ask? Are you willing to answer my personal question? Is it personal for you?
Why I'm single:
•Still dealing with the passing of my lover
•Regaining my confidence
•The desire for romance comes and goes
•Can feel wrong for having feelings with someone different.
Hugs….
Keep fighting man!
are u ok? :((
With the exception of unrealistic high standards, not learning from mistakes, and not trusting my partners, I hate to say this list really summed me up. Ever heard that expression, "You are your own worst enemy"? Self-sabotage is what I do best!
Why am I single:
1. *Strict Parents*
SAME 😢
If u have strict parents , it means you are young to live with your parents .... And that means that u r not old enough to get in a relationship which will matter
Same
X-PLAYER 59 true but I still think it’s possible for a kid/teen to find love. I mean I started developing strong feelings for people when I was 13. I felt like I was the only person in my class that actually understood people’s emotions and feelings. Most kids/teens aren’t ready for the responsibility though
@@danielh3677 yeah I know it is ... But not a long lasting one
"What mistakes have you made in your past relationships"
*Bold of you to assume I've had past relationships*
Lol same! Unless my manga/anime crushes count-
Lol
"you set unrealistic standards"
me who's only attracted to fictional characters: 👁️👄👁️
No. You may be demisexual. Thats a sign. But demisexuals only fall in love or get attracted once they have a close bond or a emotional bond with someone. Meaning your really close to them and care about them before you start getting romantic feelings for them or wanting to go on a date.
@@okcook3724 sounds like you've never heard of a Weeb.
seek help
@@darkn4s weak sauce.
Little voice well crap I might be demisexual then
Her voice is making me want to listen and learn from these videos. I love this channel. Thanks for being there for us all ❤❤.
I'm a pretty introverted person, so dating is icy territory.
I can't even imagine my future relationship or marriage and having a kids. I think I dont need love to live on life. And also I'm just too independent to dont need a partner.
Is there anyone same as my thinking?
@Rollie55 hell same, I used to become "Lonely" but as time passed I realized that I grew up by being alone and I think that's what really the happiness I have
Owl Official I thought exactly like you when I was single. But it all changed rapidly when I‘ve met my boyfriend. It becomes so real. 🙃 And he is also the person where I can only imagine to marry and have children with him someday.
I was also used to be alone before. Don‘t get me wrong I was completely fine with it. I could habe many guys before but I didn‘t want it, because it never felt right. Since the right one appeared, it‘s like the top cherry on a tasty cake. 😋 the life was nice as a single before and now he makes my life even better. 🙂
@@laluma6890 my friends also said that maybe my future soulmate can change my thinking. And also if I learned to release my bottled emotions I can experience what they call "Love" but Idk how. Probably, my self might change by time.
same here, except I’m also socially awkward and have social anxiety⚰️
Watching my parents’ marriage is more than enough to give me cynical views about love. I’ve never really witness love between two people that I know..
I too has the same views and im glad
same here, but ive come to accept that im not my parents and that my relationship is gonna be different
❤
@@random_access_memory👍👍❤
I've seen so many relationships that looked healthy and strong falling apart right before my eyes (my own experience included). So yeah, it's hard not to be slightly cynical now.
Why I’m single (at 27):
1. High standards (that match so seems reasonable to me)
2. Everyone I like ends up being married or taken or don’t reciprocate
3. Societal cultural norms
4. Of course, a global pandemic (hate online stuff at this point in my life)
✋✋ high five!
I agree with your points (except the first one)
Yup its always every friend has a wife and girlfriend but they don't have any single friends NOT EVEN UGLY single friends 🤣😂 it's so dry out there that land whales and single moms think they are entitled to a doctor/ceo husband or prince charming😑 yup future of dating sucks .....thank you feminism
That't literally me. 😅 Even the age ...
@@philipreisler3323 too lazy to try to find an explaination for something ? Blame it on feminism ! Your cheap scapegoat for everything you think is wrong in this world ! Already tried and tested by 3349673 people in the comment section, and my uncle during a family meeting.
I needed this, I was stuck in both hurt and resentment from a past failed crush confession back in high school and I have from the longest time used that as an excuse for not seeking a new relationship due to the fear of rejection and making myself emotionally vulnerable.
Reason why I'm single.
I choose to be, simple as that.
A lot of people in our current timeline are NOT relationship material, so I've simply given up on trying to look.
I prioritize my own happiness over my desire for a relationship that probably won't even last.
I’ve never been in a relationship before. Now that I’ve entered my mid-20s I’m too afraid to get into a relationship. Everyone’s so experienced from the get go nowadays and it makes me feel like I’d be insufficient as a partner.
then you have really low self esteem...
@@arthurmorgan2906 lol, that much I know for sure, but I have my reasons.
@@Barbar-barbaro I also have reasons for having low self esteem and in bad times I really do act like that. But usually I have rather healthy confidence... despite all the sh*t I've been through. What reasons you have btw?
You cannot learn without trying
go to a party drink a few beers talk to someone and boom thats if u just want to get the ykyk out the way
"you can't love someone else until you learn to love yourself first"
well, i guess i'll be alone forever then
Welcome in the club
@Sultan Sahimbaev You should reflect yourself which reasons led to you making this comment.
Okay then i will...
Woah, that’s edgy.
You can learn to love or at least accept yourself over time.
I also got from absolutely hating myself to accepting/liking myself.
You don't have to be perfect, you're enough as you are now.
From someone who had the problem of too low standards, do not settle. It’s significantly better to be single than be with someone who does not meet your standards. There’s a balance between having too high standards vs. not enough.
“If we may ask a personal question how’s your love life?”
It’s absolutely hopeless and gone to shit, thank you for asking. 🥰
Awesome answer! You made me laugh!
Here's why I think I'm single:
1. I wasn't prepared for social situations - thanks sheltered childhood
2. I'm very cynical about love, because I've been burned consistently over the years. An acquaintance of mine said I was "married to my misery" - and that hit hard.
3. I run away from any potential embarrassment, especially if it's public.
4. I've become paranoid when someone appears to show interest in me - I assume it's a trick or a scam or start looking for hidden cameras that are recording me being a sucker which will be shown to me for eternity with Nelson Muntz's laugh as the soundtrack.
5. One hundred percent low self-esteem. Nine times out of ten I genuinely hate myself.
6. A genuine worry that I'd be far too clingy and drive someone away.
7. I think my genuine personality isn't attractive - which is why I hide it behind an icy exterior of professionalism.
Thankfully I'm in therapy. But it's very difficult.
Don't let these assholes sell the lie of self love. You have every right to have low self esteem. The world hurt you. Don't let those idiots gaslight you over your very real experiences that gave you your low self-esteem. It is the world that needs more love, and needs to give more love, you don't need to do crap that only enforces your feelings of inadequacy.
@@CowToes ur right, the world needs more love. But thats not an excuse not to work on yourself to try to overcome your insecurities and live a happy life. Ur telling him to be stuck on the past and not let go of it
@@pikachumbo5256 I get that.
being so open and bold about this is very opening is a highlight in personality and thought. whenevr you are today i hope it’s going well
1 - yep
2 - Been burned 4x after my divorce, two were her, two were me. Interestingly, my ex-wife and I remain good friends. Likely, during my self imposed exile and isolation, she’s prolly my best friend at the moment. Anyway, I very much want a loving, trusting relationship again.
What keeps me from getting into a relationship:
⇝I’m an introvert and only have one friend.
⇝I’m ugly as fuck.
⇝I’m too scared to talk too anyone who isnt my best friend.
⇝I’m usually always ignored.
⇝My parents.
⇝I’m too rude/insensitive/aggressive (according to some people.)
⇝I’m literally scared of relationships.
⇝When I do develop a crush on someone I deny it and push them away.
Never felt so relatable
I used to be like you then i learnt to put on a mask. Whatever you do don’t learn putting on the mask, it’s far worse than what you’re going through right now.
You’re fine just the way you are, don’t degrade yourself, be confident in wht you look like and who you are.
1. Being an introvert doesnot mean you arenot social just that you need time away from people sometimes. Also having only 1 friend can be good i for example can say that i have only 2 friends but they are probably the best people i can be with in my situation. You should probably try to stick with that one friend and not neglect him.
2. I am quite uncertain at times how thats relevant :D i honestly dont think you are ugly if it really bothers you you can switch up some things about your looks. I believe i had the same feeling at some point but since then i changed up my hairstyle. One tip to bear with it for now is just tell yourself that you look nice whenever you end up near a mirror dont dwell on it but like just say it momentarily and move on!
3. I was also very scared of talking but then i realised that most people really didnot want to talk to me. I made a mistake of paying too much attention to people who were already in an established group of friends. One guy in particular was very friendly with everyone and i'd consider him a friend if we had a chance to talk some more (with quarantine going on its pretty hard). Another girl i talked to and got fairly close with i found by little to no effort me and my two friends just kinda had enough in common with her that we clicked effortlessly. Basically my recomendation is do not look to people who ignore you and talk to your best friend more often chances are he/she is the best friend you can have in the entire class.
4.you are usually ignored? Well i think that can mean a good thing because being ignored is a sure good way of saying "i dont wanna be friends with you" thats good because they dont make you uncertain in their intentions. If you really want to have someone else to talk to i recommend observing your classmates who do they talk to? Do they frequent same couple of people? Well in that case it might be hard for you to talk to them. If you find someone else who talks to either everyone or no one that means A they are highly friendly with everyone which means you cant try to talk with them B they prefer to be alone but you can still give it a shot. C they are a criminal this is a half true joke. If you feel like you cant talk with any of them consider asking your friend to get to know them so he can introduce you two and kinda set you up for a bit of a friendship.
5. Well i have been talking about friends all this time so i have nothing to say about your parents keeping you from dating someone. But i wanna assure you that its best you have realiabe people around you so you dont end up with someone manipulative and get trapped with them.
6. I dont know who tells you that but considering your comment in brackets you dont think you are rude in which case you should be confident in the fact that you arenot so. But beware for if someone close to you says this you should probably pay attention to them and see if you did something wrong.
7.its ok to be scared of relationships you just gotta make sure that when the time comes and you start having a crush on someone you dont shy away from their advances or youe own possible advances. Make sure that fear doesnot consume you and if it helps ask your friend(s) for help.
8.enjoy having crushes i did this myself too i realised that the person i had acrush with really wasnot interested and we werenot compatible. One thing i can tell you is just be honest with her/him and try to not deny them. Consider going up to them the previous advices were kind of a training for that. If he/she ignores you dont give into obsession and just get away from them see if you two align you cant jump into action straight ahead you gotta befriend him/her first. I hope this at least helps a bit and good luck remember one thing do not give one damn about others opinions of you its theirs and they can keep it(obviosuly unless they are your friends in which case think it over discuss it and solve the problem).
Realising is the first step to change something. If you want to.
Then you should try to love yourself
I know my issue when I happened to get to the point of talking for month with a guy was I lost myself in them. I strayed from things that normally would make me happy or that I would do. Obsessing. I've gotten better thankfully. But usually the guys would ghost me. I wouldn't talk about myself non-stop, I'd actually ask them about their self. But now, I'm single still, because of a lack of confidence and self-esteem. I've been growing in my self-esteem though.
"Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
Vodka costs less
Than dinner for two."
I'd rather have weed. It still cost less than dinner for two
ItIsFunnyDamnIt luckily, I can afford both
LoL 😅
😂😂😂👌🏼
Ayyy 😂😂
*"You have standards, you know what you want"* for some reason that was the funniest psych2go line for me mostly because of her voice when she said it
My love is too real for this fake world.....
I'll rather be single and be the right person for myself
lmao okay
You'll find one day the right person
@@manellemaiouf7389 thanks so much hey.... good things take time..❤❤
@@DeogratiusJrMichael are you in america ?
@@manellemaiouf7389 nop.... am in Cape town south Africa..🥺
I'm afraid of being happy. every time I'm happy in life, met someone, everything starts to go wrong.
One thing I love about being single is that I can sleep well at night not worrying that my partner is cheating on me.
Big facts!
Facts
Damn who hurt you
@@kaankanca4634 people i trusted and loved the most
@@justgoabby It was rhetorical ;-;
I also think it's important not to mistake red flags for "imperfections". Settling isn't good either. Don't expect the other person to be perfect, but don't ignore the warning signs.
Too many people settle just so they won't be alone. Singleness is a gift: an opportunity to become the best you can be so when you find a match, you already have your identity.
I say this (or at least think) so many times!
People often stop looking for a good partner, because they think "it could be worse". And they end up being in unsatisfying or even toxic relationship, just to get a "family they wanted".
It's a 21st century. If you want children, you can have them without a partner, but if your partner is not right for you, that's not the "family" you want.
Ye I get what ur saying my friends think the boy I like is a red flag 🚩 but I just don’t see that if u know what I mean I don’t really get that from him I think he’s the right person at this point I don’t know what to do I told him I liked him haven’t heard anything from him since but I don’t think there’s anything bad there or whatever pls help me xx
That was very beautifully said, thank you ❤️❤️
@@elisha-jayne3236 you should look inwards then. Start by doing research on yourself. Why did you find him attractive? Go full psychoanalysis on it. You can Google it too. Sounds like the guy you like is emotionally unavailable. You can google "why are emotionally unavailable people toxic" and "why am I attracted to emotionally unavailable people". You may have a hero complex that also makes you like them. Just do research of yourself. You'll realize you probably don't even like that guy, you just liked what he could of potentially become
someone asking for you're Gmail info and cash to pay their internet bill to keep a relationship going is a pretty big red flag tho.
Reasons why I'm single:
1. No one's asked.
2. See 1.
I felt that on a spiritual level 😔
Same
Honestly
When women say "nobody asks me out," I look at who's asked them out and why they're labelled 'nobody'
@@RideAcrossTheRiver 😂🤭
i’m too ugly
Nuh uh
Real
😢
Ong
I’m eating a popsicle right now
Video: "What's your love life? Are you single?"
Me: are you asking me out? Or...?
Ha!😄 you're funny
@@ramonita212 thank you!
Underrated comment 😅😅
"A relationship takes more than one person."
Should I consider my right hand as a separate person then?
Hehe.. 😏
People have dirty mind
He's just a drug dealer
There’s a great video called ‘why are we all so lonely’ about how being single isn’t a bad thing and you shouldn’t feel pressured to be in a relationship because it’s “healthy”. Not that I think this video is bad, it’s very accurate but I think being proud to be single and independent should be empowered more
I agree!
👍
Amene!
Her voice is so calming!🫶🏻
Why am I still single:
1. Waiting for fictional characters to exist in real life
Shameless plug but I make videos💖👉🏻👈🏻
Mood-
i didnt asked to be called out like that-
Must be why I am
K-drama addict and want main lead of k-drama to exist in real life. Literally this is the main reason of my high standards
I just come back from reading a fanfiction on a fictional Character I feel called it
Reasons why I'm single that none of my friends are willing to admit to me:
1. My standards are somewhat high. It's not a complete con tho. I know what I want and don't want from a relationship. I'm looking for long term not a short fling, might as well be "picky".
2. I can come off as intimidating. I dress and live my life how I want to. I'm authentic with myself and not everybody likes that for various reasons. But I don't want to be with someone who doesn't accept who I am as a person.
3. I'm quite reserved and quiet. I'm not about noise or being chatty. I'm not interested in talking to just talk. Which can make it harder for others to initiate a conversation with me or it makes me seem closed off and uninterested. I'm trying to get better at having good conversations with others though.
4. I'm hesitant to try new things alone. I was never the type to want to do something new alone, it makes me feel awkward. So when I try something new it has to be with friends, but it also might intimdate someone who wants to approach me. So I miss out on a lot of opportunities to meet new ppl.
5. I'm okay being single. I don't have the desire to rush into a relationship. I take my time with that aspect in my life. So for others it seems like I have bad luck or something, but I'm just enjoying my life in the current. And if I'm single in the current that's ok, my happiness isn't reliant on if I'm in a relationship or not.
i’ve never met anyone like me before…we’re like the same person
@@Jay-yc7tb ha ha I guess it's good to find ppl you relate to! That's the beauty of the internet ^.^
You're not the only one 👌
You just said everything about me.
I can relate. I rather be single then a relationship junkie.
It's okay to be single. Just don't be in a relationship just because you feel lonely.
100% agreed. All that does is lead to inevitable failure down the road. You actually end up feeling more alone than you did when you were single.
>Be lonely
>Don't look for a relationship anyway
>Stay lonely
@@king_sombrero8193 you missed the entire point
@@king_sombrero8193 oh dw
Then how do you stop being lonely before you get into a relationship?
I was with someone amazing for 5 years, married for 3.5. We're getting divorced now. I think I did every single thing wrong, so much so that I'm pretty sure all 10 behaviors here were things that I constantly did. I don't know how I messed up so bad and how I never learned from my mistakes for the past 5 years (#10 in the video). Everything seems so obvious now when everything is too late. Hindsight really is 20/20 and it's the worst feeling ever to know you had so much time to come to a realization and to fix things, only to never end up doing it and procrastinating until it's unfixable and undeniably over. And knowing I did it all to myself and to my wife. It doesn't make it any better when everyone just keeps telling you to learn from your mistakes now and move on.
You rarely see this openness to own failures. Mostly it's ppl blaming their exes. You're doing great, maybe you don't know it yet. Just keep reflecting yourself. Wish you all the best luck.
Gosh, that hit hard. Bro, you describe pretty much exactly what I'm going through, too. You realise all you mistakes. But it's over and everything done is unfixable. As you said, you learn for your future, but this doesn't really help here. You destroyed not only your own happiness but also the life of one person you love(d).
Is there anything you would tell your 7 months younger self now?
Either your spouse was a keeper, or you were suffering in ways that you were still not willing to admit because you thought too highly of them.
I truly believe I've given up on relationships. I fear being hurt again. Yet I also fear dying alone. I'm stuck in an infinite loop of "I wish I had someone and didn't feel so lonely" and "I'm too much of a loser so it's no wonder nobody wants me."
Hey slackerofhell, I hope you read this. You are worth it. It will take time for you to accept the past and come to good terms with your inner scars but know this: You need to talk to someone that is qualified to tell you why and/or how you feel a certain way. Don't let your inner demon tell you whats right or wrong, he will always try to talk you down from what you want. You are loved by people and there will always be someone for you out there...
I hope you are doing good and feel better. Keep your chin up, things do get greater!
@@notreallybro8508 its hard to get that help when I'm not financially stable
I don't care anymore, if love hurts, just bring it on.
Accept pain, listen to its message and go on, we can grow out hearts bigger.
@@slevinhyde3212 Fck that man I was with someone a month ago and thought we would be together for awhile I don't come across this feeling very often only like 2 or 3 times in the last 5.5 years. Just don't man.
Ppl who give up on relationships too soft and think ppl can't be replaced smh DONT GET ATTACHED TO NO TREESH BRO MAKE THAT GIRL SUBMIT send em to doonie land in the doonie van
Over the years, I’ve realized that single-hood is not the “boogey man” that society and most religions tried to convince us it was. Also, why does “finding the right person” need to be such a high priority? Fall madly, desperately in love with yourself and focus on your own self-improvement. Then, if you decide to “couple-up,” it won’t be from a place of emotional lack or dependence.
You re right. It shouldnt be for fulfulling a hole in our heart or mind but to have a companion in our lives. But how do you do that ?
I think the 'person that completes you' does not necessarily have to be the person you marry, you sleep with, or are in a romance with. sometimes platonic relationships can be fulfilling too, it's better to build a solid base than to run from relationship to relationship. I have no desire for a life partner at the moment and I am pretty happy with how my life is.
@@velvety2006 That is true that some friendships can really be fulfilling but they don t answer to some needs that are more physical. The need to have endorphines, ocytocine and dopamine can not be fulfilled by platonic relations.
I really want to like your comment but it has 69 likes and I’m not going to be the one to ruin that.
The Matt Experiment Thanks, Matt. Your comment made my day! 😆
In this day and age I have very little faith in people actually wanting to find love until they are old and used up. It seems most people just want to "have fun" instead of finding anyone. That's why I'm single. I don't think it's worth being in a relationship if nobody wants to actually find love. I don't want to be a meal ticket and I dont want to play dumb games
Well said and same here
That's not why you're single, that sounds like a cheap excuse :) There's more than 7+ billion people on this planet and probably millions of people in your own country. If you are generalizing everyone you meet and you aren't open minded then of course you're not gonna find someone who shares your interests. Can't find something if you aren't looking for it mate. No one said it will be easy and the first person you meet will click with you instantly. It might take some effort and time but if you're persistent in your goals, then it's absolutely guaranteed that you will achieve them! Good luck brother and lots of love to you
@@lsdannny268 this gives hope, thank you for that
Well said, John!
@@lsdannny268 Don't have to generalize anyone ask a few questions and people will disqualify themselves.