ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 3 ส.ค. 2020
- Are you looking for the red flags and signs a relationship isn't working? A rocky start to a relationship doesn’t necessarily equate to a miserable one. After all, conflicts and misunderstandings are bound to arise in any relationship. However, a lot of the problems you’ll be dealing with later on usually occur in the beginning. Are you currently dating someone? Are you looking for red flags? If so, watch this video. Share it with someone who might need it.
Writer: Chloe Avenasa
Script Editor: Denise Ding
Script Manager: Kelly Soong
VO: Amanda Silvera
Animation: Grace Cárdenas Cano
TH-cam Manager: Cindy Cheong
Have your own relationship experiences that you want to share with us? Email us at editorial@psych2go.net
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I feel like if you watch this, you definitely care about your relationship.
I really do but I feel like my relationship is one sided
Then there’s me watching even tho I’m not in a relationship lol
@@xxvain lol
I'm in a relationship...but I feel like I'm giving to much n getting too less....its actually silly to think..may be...but when my partner calls me I am always available...like 99.99% available...but when I call him or try to spend time with him..he is asleep..or else he picks up the phone n asks me to hung up just bcoz he wants to sleep...N this thing frequently hurts me but I try my best to hide my pain behind my smile...stillI I fail sometimes when its unbearable...I am in that point in my life n relationship that I don't know what to do..what to say and how to react ....I really fo need a 3rd person help😢🥺😓🙏
I should've cared when we were still together
Not me getting ready to overthink my non existent relationship🤡
mood
mood
Literally me 😭
Stay single. Trust me😎
Not me overthinking my current.
0:55 1. Your relationship is solely about the romantic pull
1:29 2. You don't like their friends
1:57 3. You spend too much time together
2:24 4. Your relationship feels one-sided
2:48 5. You feel controlled
3:18 6. You can't be yourself around them
3:51 7. You don''t feel accepted
4:26 8. You fight all the time
4:49 9. You don't trust each other
5:37 10. They're regularly mean to other people
6:07 11. They're passive aggressive
6:41 12. The timing isn't right
hope this helped
Oh thank you
God bless you
Thanks dude
Gosh. Literally EVERY "relationship" I've ever had. 😕
My parents' marriage is like this, too. It's also very codependent, too. It's been like this for DECADES, in fact, and ever since I was born, I've never recalled them being loving or affectionate towards one another. They should've been divorced a long time ago, but, alas, they're still married after 40+ years. I don't count this at all, though. They've just been roommates who hate each other but became too used to it, and it's bad enough that my dad actually CHOOSES to sleep on the couch and did that for so long now that he can't fathom ever sleeping in a real bed. This affected my sister and me, too.
If anybody sees these signs in their relationship, please do yourself a favor and break up with that person. Do not think about giving them a second chance, lest they take advantage. And definitely do not marry them, much less have kids to drag into this chaotic situation.
I watched this about 2 months into my last relationship and went “oh thank god I don’t have any of these signs.” Came back again 7 months after that relationship ended. The signs just hadn’t surfaced yet since they were still in the lovebombing phase. This video is 100% correct 🤷
Literally had the same experience except i watched it a year into our relationship
@@xxkatiefansonamyxx. Amy wiillmas crush 😻 on. JoMurry friends best 1.
2. in Relationships. all. Love ❤️ together.
3. staring. at. each other.
4. Smile.😊.
5. metal. where college
6. from lost years 20201.
7. Filst kiss 😘
@@xxkatiefansonamyxx. AmyJoMurry Relationships 2 years ago after
Strong friendship all. Love ❤️ together
20201. AmyJoMurry woking together.
Staring at. each other.
like you.
Samee!!
This is me too. We broke up at almost one year then get back together, Now we live together for two months it was just very painful to separate but maybe it's for the best
the fact that my girfriend literally broke up with me over text while i was in the middle of watching this video 💀💀💀
Damn, I hope you're alright
@@parklez3250 thank you haha, I'm going to be okay, I just need a little time to heal
I’m gonna end it or try to
She’s said she never loved me
I was too invested in her
I tried my best to be the best boyfriend for her and she said it was all a joke
It’s been a good run guys I hope to die and go back to wherever I came from
When your boyfriend is a red flag but you're colourblind 💀
😂😂😂
😹😹 No love blind
Damn... 😕
Yooooh 😂
🤔😭😂
In the case of my wife and I, we fought quite often early in our relationship. To the point where she didn’t think we were going to make it. One important factor was the way we resolved those fights. Through mature communication and the willingness to try and adapt we’ve been able to learn how to co-exist better. I believe being able to resolve fights is one of the keys as you’re bound to get into them eventually.
Did you and your wife sometimes stay a couple of days away from each other after a big fight? Like, you still communicate over the phone but not as often as usual?
This! I had severe trust issues in our relationship because of my upbringing. This caused a lot of fights initially because I couldn’t control my emotions even though I knew it was wrong. When I saw it was ruining our relationship, I apologised and promised to never do that again. She gave me time to slowly control my emotions and I put in the effort to do so. Communication is definitely important in a relationship. If both of you wants to make it work, you’ll do anything for it
@@malu8710 Thank you for your answer, pretty much whats been happening in my relationship where I just can't controll my constant overthinking. Probably doesnt help that it's the first relationship for the both of us. luckily she is patient, and I will take your tips and have them in the back of my head, specially with working on my trust issues :)
Hi Jeffrey! Thank you for sharing your experience! I can currently relate to your wife’s previous position. And if I may ask, what made you decide to continue that relationship? Since having a partner who didn’t think the relationship has a future can be taken as a sign of incompatibility. And thank you in advance if you decide to share your wisdom!
@@t.h.3146 For me it was easy to continue as I've never been so sure of someone. She was my best friend and I remember not being able to describe why I loved her so much - it's as if I didn't need a reason. Yes, it was a bit unnerving that she felt that way, however, something in my heart knew we were meant to be together. For my wife, she really struggled to reconcile between what her head vs heart was telling her. One day, it also clicked for her and here we are today.
I hope that you also find your truth.
This video has truly made me realize how problematic I've been with my partner. I'd oftenly cause conflicts over such petty reasons. He has his flaws too and so do I. I've been reflecting on myself lately. We're currently on a break from each other and both agreed on working on ourselves for the mean time. I've been doing a good job on improving myself, I used to be so defensive and immature. I just wanna be the partner he deserves.
Good on you for trying to better yourself, that is very valuable
@@sarchiba thank you! That means a lot
Great sista 👏
@@daddyganesh8958 We have broken up but we're in good terms. I appreciate your encouragement a lot 🤞🏽💛
How long have you been in the break for?
"You spend too much time together"
Couples living together during quarantine: ...
ibuki pfp
😂😂me rn. But we’re both introverts so i actually only see my bf for like half the day
I don't think it's not good to spend too much time together... What about people married for 20+ years n stuff? I mean as long as you both understand each other, Love them unconditionally, be honest, treat them well, respect them and their decisions and by being loyal, you can really look forward into being in a serious relationship. I don't think there is any actual problem if they spend too much time together. Well, we need to give them space, coz that's like a necessary thing in a relationship. So yeah!
@The Angry Introverted Scotsman I wouldn't say no to that... :)
Gayathri B.G Spending too much time together is most certainly a problem. We need our own interests, hobbies, friends, etc. Plus working. That’s 8 hours everyday that you don’t see them if you have a 9-5 type of job (like I do.) You’ll hate each other if you spend too much time together, and I need a few hours to myself every morning and when I come home from work simply because I will be the worst person to be around if I can’t have alone time. I will be moody, snappy, and aloof if I go a few days without having me time. And plus that’s a sign of toxicity and dependence if you and/or your partner need to be around each other or talk 24/7. My abusive ex wouldn’t even let me sleep unless I was otp with him. It got to the point where he would come with me to the bathroom when we were living together. Trust me... it’s definitely a bad thing.
No hate but, dont break up with someone just because of this video
look out though
@@exhhhhh_b ye
What if someone is getting depressed for these exact reasons?
Some people may feel that this lit up the lightbulb. But YES its not good to leave someone right away just because you watched a video. But the video is information, and it that information starts the gears a-turnin' then perhaps it is better to look into your relationship a little deeper and question the things you related to the video. In that way, the video is a supplement to one of the reasons a person would walk out, but not THE definitive reason. Let's hope that anyone who broke up because of this video had other input as well, such as thinking a lot about it, input from friends, reading, etc. whatever it may be.
kinda think this 😭🥺
I used to be passive aggressive in my LDR. Honestly he had every right to leave because I was making our relationship difficult so instead he stayed and helped me uncover the root of the problem. We are going still dating and about to reach a 3 year mark. It's not perfect but worth making it work😊
its amazing
@@kata9755 Well all I can honestly share is my experience so here goes I hope it helps:-) Since i grew up not knowing how to communicate my feelings I struggled a lot later as a young adult so he instead encouraged me to be honest about my feelings, why I felt a certain way whenever we faced challenges as a couple as well as in our individual everyday lives with others. it took time but eventually I got the hang of talking about how I felt even about past experiences. That's how I realized I was holding onto anger from childhood experiences which really wasn't dealt with in a healthy was hence I became passive aggressive. Communicating my emotions and getting to understand them was what helped me I guess.
Hi, Are you still in LDR with your partner?
Here ldr and I made it hard for him. I know we loved each other but it was my ego issue that ruined it. He said I'm not the only one who's wrong in this, he was too. We both can't fully make each other happy. It has ended after 10 months together
in your Lana Del Rey?
“Some people will leave you soon no matter how, but it's not the ending of your story, it's just the ending of their role in your story. cause life goes on"
What a nice, true quote.
hey bucky. you assasinated anyone yet?
@@MercenaryFox Yep. He doesn't look like he was ever loved anyone.
Trueee
Beautiful
Bad comunication and not being able to resolve conflicts and collisions is what ends relationships for me.
This is why I just ended my marriage. We have just about all these signs but communication was our biggest and most heart breaking thing for me. If two people don't communicate well, no matter how hard they try, maybe they're just not meant for each other...
Or when you try to talk about how you feel about something in the relationship and she starts to lash out and starts to gaslight you in always making drama...
Especially when communication is slowly disappearing not like the usual before
That's why I ended the relationship....
Relatable, we were never the wiser back then, Happy life stranger.
Is there ever really a perfect time for a relationship though? I feel like if two people who are very goal driven end up falling for each other, then they’ll never really feel like it’s the perfect time fit a relationship
you rather feel free
Yeah I think it’s really just about the mental space either person is in, even if things like work or school or other responsibilities get in the way of meeting each other’s needs, you have to know yourself and your own capacities to both give and receive love.
Im in a recent relationship with my crush and she always treated me like I’m worth something great. Everyone at my school treat us like we’re worth nothing.We always encouraged and cheered each other up when we were feeling blue. Talking to her and hanging out with her brings happiness into both of our lives. I honestly don’t want to be with any other girl but her. And watching these videos made me realize that this relationship is going to be really strong. We are both going to the ninth grade and I now know that we will still be together through high school. 😊
Oh poor baby Stfu wuss
How’s it going?
I hope it works out for you!
"Tell me who your friends are and I tell you who you are"
Has no friends.
Deadass tho, explains a lot for me
You're a nobody
You dont exist
@@MattBG67 let me hope thats a joke
😂❤️
me: is in a healthy and loving relationship
youtube: hmMMmMmmMmmMmm jUst GOnNa rEcoMmeNd ThiS ReaL QuiCK
I had the exact same thought. 😄
😂😂😂
😂😂😂😂
I hope your relationship is still going steady and you both are happy! Have a good day :)
so true haha
Number 12 is so relatable for my relationship... We hit it off so well the first month and bad things outside of our control just keep happening to her and now we haven't talked in like 4 weeks... Sometimes you can't control these things so please don't blame yourself, trying to find faults within you when it's really out of your control... Damn I miss her :(
1. Watching videos or listening to people put ideas into your head about why your relationship wont last. 2. These thoughts convince you they are real. 3. Convinced it will happen, you self-fulfill these prophecies. 4. You sabotage yourself and your relationship unwittingly, but purposefully. 5. You end up being the reason the relationship doesn't last. 6. You feel vindicated in your earlier predictions. 7. You are convinced these videos and/or other people must be right since what was said came true. 8. You carry this out with every relationship you attempt regardless of any potentially different outcomes. 9. You share this so-called wisdom with your friends and family. 10. The toxicity of this mindset continues to spread like an out-of-control virus, therefor avoiding the real issue, which is yourself.
WHY ARE YOU SO RIGHT???? 😭😭😭😭😭
This is so damn true, it all starts with the thoughts you allow to shape your reality; your approach and your intention in relationships is what matters the most. You cannot expect to mold a relationship without the right tools. I am guilty of this cycle bc I've done it many times only to realize how blinded I was to believe my own prophecies and keep myself from working on the relationship which makes the other person exhausted bc who would want to work on it without your counterpart, right? I'm still working on this. And its not easy but having a partner who's willing to make the same efforts makes it a lot more worth it. Best wishes to you guys, let's keep working on ourselves 🧡
It's a matter of perspective and opinion that can possibly allow greater insight. It shouldn't be digested as a "one size fits all". If it doesn't apply, let it fly. Don't do the exact thing you're so adamant about. Let others formulate what works best for THEM.
Damn, thank you for this
Yep. Forget about these crappy "psychologists", they're just trying to make a buck with these videos
Not everything we lose is a loss. Sometimes, you're relieved free from the pain of holding on to the ones who aren't meant to be in our life.
I felt that😭💖
Wow Anjali
Yess...this is exactly what I've been dealing with recently.
Facts
Yes, I'm starting to see how true this is.
It is important to maintain your identity in any and all relationships...
More important is to keep your money far from them...
🗣🗣🗣🗣💯💯
Daniel Esteve lmfao I have made some bad investment calls
Daniel Esteve I’ve made some bad decisions too regarding sharing my coins , sigh
Yes it is but it's not always as possible as we'd like it to b unfortunately 😔. Ik this 1st handedly cuz I live in a relationship like what was discribed in the video & I am constantly questioning my true identity. Which in my opinion no one should have to do if ur in a honest, loving, caring, & trustworthy relationship.
chat am i cooked?
I will not lie, these help me be a better boyfriend. I love my girlfriend to the moon and back, but I also didnt realize how I truly was acting and reading her signs wrongfully, until I started watching these videos. Forever greatful and thankful for videos like these. So many signs I've realized with my girlfriend and in myself, now I feel like I could love her better than I already do. I thought I knew how to love her before, but you know what it's been said "when you watch the truth, then you understand and realize at the same time." Thank You.
The mark of a truly deserving boyfriend is one who can both admit these things, and change for the benefit of his partner! Props to you man, hope you and your girl are doing okay and that you have the best life together!
This is so beautiful, I wish you and your girlfriend the best.
@@Irenebloom she has left me been single now since. Anyways I wish nothing but the best for you!
@@ethanloch3802 hey sorry it took so long to reply. She has left me and have been single since. Thank you for your kind words, It’s because of people like yourself who show that they care is what kept me from going insane. Thank you again.
@@michaelbishop2930 I don't know why she left you, but you should know that it's people like you who are the ones who set an example for a good relationship. So many people nowadays forget how important the connection is. It's so materialistic and people think it's all about looks and money. Even money can't buy a personality. Never forget that, and I hope whatever happens you keep your attitude from your original comment with the next one, and if she doesn't leave you, I can assure you you'll make her very happy.
I'm not ashamed to admit I was the toxic part of the relationship. The reason being, is that I've since identified and taken care to fix those habits I'd formed. And my lovely ex, has helped facilitate my getting better as a person for it. That woman is a goddess and deserves nothing but praise for her patience.
Kudos for being man enough to admit it.
Becoming responsible for your own words can help your self esteem build character. Speak positive for what you believe and you will get what you need,
love this energy
More power to you! And we need more people like her!
You’re very lucky! I’m in your day one shoes right now
*12 early signs a relationship won't last :*
1. your relationship is solely about the romantic pull
2. you don't like their friends
3. you spend too much time together
4. your relationship feels one-sided
5. you feel controlled
6. you can't control yourself around them
7. you don't feel accepted
8. you fight all the time
9. you don't trust each other
10. they're regularly mean to other people
11. they're passive aggressive
12. the timing isn't right
Gank you bruhva
6(u can't be yourself around them)💜
For me it’s numbers #2, 4, 5, & #7.
for me its 3
We spend too much ti!e together cos we are married( ；∀；)..is it okay then?
this video validated my feelings on my relationship, it feels so good to be in a healthy relationship, and know that our small disagreements are ok, as long as we talk them out :)
I am very glad to say that my relationship is fine, but I also realized throughout this video that my relationship with my mom is toxic.
when your boyfriend is a red flag, but you're a bull ☠️
:)
😂😂😂😂
@MAYUR TRIVEDI_X_I_19 how did u comment that emoji?-
XD UNDERRATED
:awesome:
My wife of 20 years made me feel like I could be my truest self since day 1. Before we even got married I cried in her arms over this very fact. To this day she says she doesn’t remember that moment 😂 😆 😝. But she’s my best friend, and I can’t see myself with anyone else besides her. Here’s to another 20 years!!
Aww this is so sweet☺️happy 20 year anniversary for you guys!!
This restored my faith in men a bit...I look forward to the part in my life when I meet someone who appreciates and chooses me from day 1. I entered all past relationships with an attitude to understand them, in hopes of it being reciprocated only to find out down the line that they lie, use me and dim my light. Working on myself to prevent similar relationships I have to leave in future
@@stararmy7219 thank you.
@@Ellie-nq6ws if you can meet a man that can connect with you on an emotional, intellectual, and more than a physical level engage him thoroughly. They exist, you’ll definitely know the difference.
I love hearing these stories!
All the best!
Been dating for 8 years, and the signs are more visible now 😔
I have started playing some couple question games like “Lovify”. To understand each other better. In this game, we have to guess each other's likes. This helped me understand my gf's expectations better. And, she is loving it. Cheers, to all couples. We all will make it through 💞
"We often settle for less in a relationship, than the things required to have a fulfilling one"
-Thanks.
All these comments are so genuine and heartfelt. What a great community. Glad we can bond together everyone ❤
6 reasons why Psych2Go is an awesome channel
1. The girl's voice is *calming*
2. They post every day
3. Their videos are helpful
4. They sometimes heart/reply to comments
5. They make learning fun
6. The drawings have adorable lil sprouts on their heads
So their content is to a high standard
7. Always amazing 😉
This channel totally helped me get thru a divorce last summer. Thanks psych2go
The girls voice is calming what-
Agreed
Ive been overthinking my relationship and this def made me overthink it more
Same..
Samw
Literally same :,)
So I'm not the only one...
Hahahaha
All 12...she did all 12. I looked past so much for the sake of not being alone again. I learned to love myself and see through those rose tinted glasses. After 6 years of being together, 1 and half of that married, we ended it with divorce back in January.
What an extremely soothing voice! One of the most soothing voices on TH-cam. The person speaking in your videos + the cartoons make your videos so soothing to watch. Thank you
I saw him every Saturday. The first 1-2 months was amazing, for him it was like a get away from the issues he had prior to me. It was a fantasy. It was a dream. He was amazing. We were perfect. I became attached to him and he became the only person I wanted to talk to and hang out with. However, on his birthday, 18 hit him and all the issues he had prior to me had toppled on top of him meaning he was going through serious things in life and gave me less attention. As I took that personally and I did not know at the time, I brought up more and more issues between us in our relationship and created a lot of stressful situations for him. I stopped becoming the thing which made him forget about all his problems and our relationship became another problem. This created a bigger drift between us and he took to his games and his friends as a distraction which left me alone for longer and created even bigger issues.
Please take this from me and do not become attached or dependent on your partner to bring you happiness. It kills a relationship. You are not ready for a relationship if you are. You need to grow and accept yourself and love yourself before you love someone else.
I can very much relate to this 😭
Very relatable😭😭
Exactly what happened to me. I feel you.
Very self aware
But if you are already dependent on them how do you undo it ? 😭😭💔
The people admiting themselves and being proud of their improvement in the comments just brings smile to my face. Very brave. We got this. Not a single one of us here are perfect.
Your comment just made me smile, so thanks for paying it forward :) so true that we all are guilty of some less than ideal behaviors, and that's ok! We just all need to keep trying our best
🙏🏻🙏🏻
thank you, i needed this
“Perfection is a Myth”
That quote hits different
Only last for three months, realization, awakening, acceptance, and healing. I learned a lot to love myself better.
If you are watching this while you are heartbroken, because the relationship you had was perfect to you and you try to find a reason why he is gone, I feel you. I am struggling too.
Hope you are okay Gaia. Go no contact, and work on yourself. Life is short, either he comes back or someone else better will come into your life. Do the self care work and take care!
Honestly! My heart aches so much because I know how much I was willing to make it work despite everything but he just watched me put in all the efforts. I’m really begging God to heal me.
💜💜💜
@@blessingugochi2029 just try and see it from another point of view...if you tried so hard and he didnt do anything, its good riddance! hes not the one for you, you need someone who puts equally as much effort as you did. Value yourself more and come to realise that he wasnt good enough for YOU, not the other way around. Realising this should make it a little bit easier to get over it. I know its hard in the moment, but time will show you it was a good thing to happen, not a bad one!
There was a lot of issues, the main one was the timing wasn't right. I'm a better person now, which he helped me to be. So is he, he's a better person now because of me and he told me this. But he is my soulmate, and I cannot escape this horrible crushing feeling that what is done, is done. It's too broken and the past is inescapable. He sees me as his best friend, and I wish I could do it all again as the person I am now, go back in time, start fresh. But it's over and I am having a really hard time accepting it or moving on with my life.
The list for those who are in a hurry:
1. Your relationship is solely about the romantic pull 0:55
2. You don't like their friends 1:27
3. You spend too much time together 1:57
4. Your relationship feels one-sided 2:24
5. You feel controlled 2:46
6. You can't be yourself around them 3:16
7. You don't feel accepted 3:50
8. You fight all the time 4:26
9. You don't trust each other 4:59
10. They're regularly mean to other people 5:35
11. They're passive-aggressive 6:06
12. The timing isn't right 6:40
Who else is a single pringle here?
I am I I'm kinda proud to be.
Just Broke up with my 28th girlfriend
Spending too much time together huh, should I break things off even before there could(if there could ever be) an us😞
@@vasigheroef.2635 I don't know
@@tanyadegurechaffhellspawn3784 WHAT
Love really is blind, isn't it. Welp, Moral of the story: don't fall in love.
You don't have to stay single. I think you just have to find someone who you can trust not to do any of these things. ❤
we’re going through a rough patch. we were too dependent on each other, which caused jealousy. we are taking time for ourselves currently , and i pray that the outcome comes out looking happy and healthy. every other part of our relationship was so beautiful
Relationships last because two people make a choice to keep it, so we need to fight for and work for it. Being someone’s first love may be great, but to be their last is beyond perfect 🖖
So truee💕💕
Long story short, love is a choice :)
@Bekah L. so how do you guys choose who to love?
and since when is love a choice?
@Bekah L. if what you guys said includes Family love then maybe I don't really choose to love them maybe I do maybe I don't
@@monabohamad2242
He meant its a choice to stay and fight for it if you choose it to work.
You can choose to make it work because you love someone. Even after the feelings arent so strong anymore.
Bold of you to assume I'll end up in a relationship someday.
WOOOOOOW SAME
😂😂
They don't assume, you're the one who clicks the video
.
.
LOL, jk jk jk XD
Yeah, I'm too ugly and short to even TRY
Lol, good comment.
I truly began a relationship just about 2 months ago (officially) however, just as much joy as it bring, it swings back greatly like a pendulum to give the same amount of great pain and worry when there is constantly people all around trying to rip us apart
HOMICIDAL Rage and SUICIDAL grief
consume every cell of my being.
My girlfriend most likely won’t see this, but I’m really lucky to have her in my life. Before we met my life was so empty because of my parents recent divorce and my dad moved away I also moved away from all my friends all in the same week I met her and at first didn’t see her romantically but we hung out more often and I just fell in love she treats me with so much respect and love ahhhh I love her so much. I am aware how grammatically incorrect that statement was but idc I love her so much
Me: *I’m your girlfriend and I saw this.*
-
XDD sorry this was immature of me but I just want to 😊, hopefully you both still together still, good luck! Keep it strong!
OMG I LOVE YOU IM SO GREATFILL TO HAVE U IN MY LIFE YOURE THE BEST
Bruh listen to me... This is comming from a person who's situation was kindof similar... Try to fight with life alone.. Win over it be happy and then share the hapiness.. Unconciously you will look for hapiness from the other person and im honestly saying that it won't last
@Maja bruh
@@welhungyongmancitywok8189 Nah, it's nothing. Message could be useful for someone else and expressing an opinion and a general piece of advice is easy to do. Braveness is something doesn't suit me, in this case. What that person does in her life is something I don't truly care: everybody does what it wants in its own life and I don't feel like looking for persons' identities for each messages on the youtube.
"You can't take a joke ugh"
...I heard that a million times
I don't know how to feel about this. I always kind of felt that, that was a red flag, because not everything is a joke and when I continued watching the video and mentioned that sign. Uuuf, I was like daaamn... I could relate to 5 and I feel that is too much for too long.
Saying that is a tell tale sing of a total asshole.
you probably cant
Gaslightingg
I used to say this thinking my gf had a similar sense of humour as mine. I stopped doing it when she told me she didn't like it. wasn't enough of a change I guess.
This reminded me of the relationship i had with my ex bsf and this video only reminds me to stop rushing to be in a relationship, i have to do whats right for my future and sometimes it means waiting a little longer for love and thats ok… people come and go but only you will ever truly have yourself so love yourself and know your worth and then when the time is divine youll have all that youve ever wanted for yourself
Omg if only i had seen this video i would be avoiding a long time of pain. Okay, so it had started because of romantic feelings to each other. Well, I told him first that I did. But we were just so different from each other. We had so little in common but I tried so hard to ignore that. Sadly, he did not and just kept bringing it up all the time. I didn't like most of his friends and he always made fun of my friends, my closest friends, even though I never insulted any of his friends. He just became a whole different person when he was around those "friends" and I never liked that person. The relationship always felt like one-sided. He decides what we do, where we go, what we eat, I didn't have a say in it most of the time. He always controlled me. "Be like that, act like that, wear like that" and none of "that" was me. We fought like a hundred times because of that. He would never accept or change that so I would just try to end the fighting because I didn't want to fight anymore. I could never act like the real me around him. There was always something wrong for him. Like, I'm a childish person. I like to dress like that, I like to act like that, I like to talk like that. But he was always like "act like your age, why are you so childish?". I could never have fun when I was with him. He wouldn't accept me like that. I changed my whole style because of him. I wore things that I wouldn't normally wear but that still didn't make him happy. He would make fun of people behind their back. Even though I always tell him to stop saying these things, he wouldn't stop. AND the worst part is that he would just keep talking to those people that he makes fun of. He was...utilitarian. He always thought that he would get advantage of these "friendships". He was so passive aggressive. Like, he would mention something I am or I do in the middle of a conversation with me and other people but he would mention it like I didn't do it. Like, I was kind of trying to figure out some things about my sexual preferences. I thought I was bisexual back then and he would be like "Glad my girlfriend isn't bisexual or anything". I know what you're thinking, "why didn't you break up with him if he was so horrible?". I was afraid of being alone. I didn't have many relationships. I didn't have many people who actually liked me. So if I left him, I'd be alone, again. The "love" I was feeling made me blind. But, at the end, I met someone while I was still with him. I met someone that when I was with I could be "me". I fell for him, when I made sure that I was feeling something for him, I broke up with my boyfriend. We started dating. And I realized all these bad things about him after we broke up. Now I am sincerely happy. I actually feel like this relationship is my reward. I believe, well we both believe that we're soulmates. I actually feel like, and really really REALLY hope, this one will last. Pray for us guys!
Hope your relationship goes well ❤ damn, your boy emulated pretty much all the signs except for sign 12, which I have to say I could fill in for you. I'm 18, blind, really curious about relationships, but I would lose everything if I even tried to pursue something with someone. However, I can only promise that when the right one comes along, I won't control them or do any of that stuff because I can't even see what people wear 😂
i don’t even have a relationship, *why* am i watching this.
Probably to get Educated
well I'm only making a guess
You best get into one
It is not a fault to admit you do not know.
It’s the bold why for me
Hahahaa me too
i want to break up with my boyfriend, i’ve never felt so alone when i’m with someone. he purposely humiliates me and my past in front of other people knowing i’m embarrassed about it. he calls other women hot and cute in front of me, he is more affectionate with them than he ever was and will be with me. ive spent so much money on him, he begs for money everyday and get upset w me when i say i barely have any for myself. only time he looks excited to be with me is when i give him sexual pleasure. he gets so irritated with me when i tell him in not in the mood and tells him i kill his mood all the time just by talking. he tells me “i don’t care” to everything i say or enjoy. this person is a literal cancer to me. ive never been so un attracted to someone in my life, so repulsed by someone’s personality. it took me so long to realize but i deserve better, i break up with him tomorrow. wish me luck
I know you didn’t ask, but you deserve so much more and I hope you find someone who makes you feel soooo loved 🥰
He was the one who helped me in restoring back my ex partner three days ago without delay
Whtsaap him"**
How’d it go?
i hope all went well. you deserve so much better than that!! best of luck
I’ve been in the wrong timing boat before. It really hurt because I felt my significant other was absolutely perfect for me and it was definitely a tragic end just like the video said. I led to a lot of lifetime struggles because of comparison issues. She was a first in my life and no one ever could measure up to her. After decades of back and forth emotionally with this person and finally reaching mutual understanding the two of us have agreed the relationship was more than normal and was very special, however life didn’t wait and each of us moved on. Today, we are still friends. The friendship isn’t perfect but thanks to social media we can still say hello and how are you. Even though it’s been hard, it’s been worth it, to not abandon the other, even if it only means we’re distant friends.
after i had a big fight with my girlfriend of ~1 month and i started questioning things and rethinking things and there’s just so much you can miss when you’re in the moment, especially in the honeymoon phase. the fact that we even got into a fight this big at not even a month in is a giant red flag. im breaking up with her soon (i dont know when cus she wont text me with when shes free to talk >:( but im telling myself that ill do it over text in 2 days if needed) and im proud that i have the decency to cut this off and that i had the self-awareness to start questioning her instead of bowing to my knees trying to fix things. ive been thinking that if this fight didnt happen i dont know how much time i would’ve wasted, and this video just re-affirms that.
When my husband and I first started dating, we spent 8+ hours a day together. This was not due to co-dependence. But the fact that we were both in the same college classes and had the same major. We made good lab partners because we worked well together. We hung out with our friends seperately or together, but we liked and still like spending a lot of time together. We'll have been married for 6 years in May.
Opposite situation--my bf and I don't have any classes together (very different majors) and I dislike studying together because it feels like he's so focused on whatever important work he's doing, and all I can do is wait for him to be done. So right now we only spend time together when we're both free. Do you have any advice on how I can become more comfortable with studying together?
@@ben24763 I honestly don't have specific advice. We just got along very well, and even if we weren't studying together it was enough to be studying in the same room, but not necessarily studying together. I don't expect him to be constantly engaging with me. If he is focused on something, I let him finish and do my own thing and vice versa. We understand that if one of us is in the zone, then the other doesn't interrupt.
Periodddd
@@ben24763 had the same situation as you when I was in highschool. I would say just do your own thing (talking to friends, drawing, finishing tasks) that's what I did and I hope it helps for you too ^^
Wow... Sounds wonderful... Congrats and wish you both many many more loving years ahead!
People who disliked realized there relationship is about to hit rock bottom.
just two people XD
@@hugegander9477 perfect XD
No, they're too blind to realize these 12 facts
Edrick Wilson haters have their notifications on :/
@@earllawrence7108 its a good thing tho
I think the worst part about this is that looking from both me and my partners perspectives, over half of these checked out for our relationship and I hate that I'm the one who ended up doing half of these things to my partner yet never realized it until it was too late. At least it's never too late to improve though.
To expand on number 7, it’s ok if they just point out parts that they have observed may be dangerous or unhealthy. It’s a good thing if your partner points something out that you can improve on. As long as it’s healthy. Like if someone is bad at communicating or has an anger issue, it’s not a bad thing to bring it up and discuss it. And it’s not a bad thing to fix bad habits and unhealthy parts of your personality. A good partner will also help you grow into a better person.
ACCEPTANCE. Sometimes, you just have to accept that some relationships are not meant to last--and that's okay. Another great learning experience, as they say. ❤️❤️❤️
Yeah understanding something and learning from it is healthy.
@@ronaldvasquez6488 I agree, Ronald! Truly, it pains us but the learnings are our rewards. ❤️❤️❤️
Not great. But a learning experience for sure.
my boyfriend & i have been dating for 7 months & this is first healthy relationship of my life and this video just validates that to me even more. the only thing on this list thats true for us is we spend a lot of time together, but even then we still make time for friends & family as well. I'm so happy :)
I don't even know you but I'm very happy for you!
Good for you:)
You give me hope
Happy 1 year :)
Still going strong??
Generally it comes a time when you need to stop relationship because it isn’t working for you anymore and it isn’t making you happy and you don't enjoy. Be careful to the signs you should look out for to know when it’s time to let go the relationship.
Here we have respectful list of signs. It takes time to move on, but let yourself feel and grieve and just be. Remember that you deserve love. And the right person will be near you.
Thank you ! Great job !
In the passing aggressive face you may want to include the long silence faces as punishment… you resume is very accurate…
I completely agree: when someone doesn't accept you the way you are and want you to be someone else, stay yourself or leave, it can never be wealthy or sane
That's exactly what everybody does...
Honestly to a degree, if someone isn't ready to also changd and grow with you (of course on both sides!) then that's the biggest red flag for me. When someone is too stubborn to see that they too have flaws that might be hurtful. Of course there's a difference between changing everything on demand and having a conversation about some things that ask for compromise and maybe sacrifice. So yeah, accepting the flaws but also trying to better oneselfs and the relationship. Communication jeij
There is actually so much to bear when it comes to relationship. No matter how good you are to them it doesn’t mean that they will treat you the same way. It’s so sad to discover my woman whom I thought could be a back up but it seems I have been deceiving myself for months. I need to desperately know what she’s been up to lately so I had to reach out to webhubghost (@) gmailcom who got so many truthful and amazing reviews on the internet to remotely get into her mobile phone. He got that done in a twinkle of an eye, the service was delivered perfectly I was able to see her whatsapp messages, call logs, text messages which was quite amazing and I figured she lied to me about all the money i sent to her and her mails were the worst I could ever imagine.. I sincerely recommend webhubghost @ gmailcom if you are in need of a similar service and you want a perfect job done. This is not a hoax or deceit, I need everyone to find their luck spying their partner with this honest and noble IT expert. This app works perfectly but you need the help of the real deal with the email above to get loose from the chains of a cheater and abusive relationship by getting concrete proof through his expertise and prowess. Give Ben a try and regret no more, better days ahead.
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It’s about the willingness to evolve to be the best possible person you can be. Some people may “be themselves” but have horrible habits that inhibit their own self growth. Should be motivating each other to be better.
Me: single
Also me: oh no he’s leaving me
😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
12 is important. Life is long, and impatiently starting a relationship isn't smart, but I unfortunately find it to be a common occurrence to people around me. On the other hand, I think it's exciting to be friends with someone for months or years before confessing to each other and starting an intimate relationship.
The timing not being right is the hardest in my opinion. It's out of both of your control and it's all down to one's life path. For instance, one could be moving home, one may not be in a positive headspace at that period in their life, one could simply not be ready for a relationship. It's an inevitable sadness.
I met a guy and we had the most intense friendship chemistry. Sadly we tried to date and that was the worst mistake of my life... It ended pretty badly two years later we're friends again 😂
so relatable...
May I ask why it didn't work as a couple, but did (and does again) as friends?
agree with ^
@@simonedesabata9538 have the same question
@@simonedesabata9538 some combinations of qualities are just perfect for friendship..but as a romantic/sexual relationship is different, they may not go so well together in that case (just my opinion)
I need to add, as a licensed counselor, the video focused on the "other" when the more difficult evaluation of oneself should be considered if any of those traits and behaviours describes YOU. Understanding that will help you understand why you have difficulties in sustaining or obtaining meaningful relationships.
Only problem is, people would either dismiss that any of those traits are exhibited by them or super insecure people would see everything is wrong with them.
Saumya and that’s why counselors and therapists have jobs!👍🏽😂
This is so true! I noticed that most of those signs were in my (ex) relationship somehow, but sometimes he was the one who showed unhealthy behaviors (like passive-agressiveness), and sometimes it was me (not trusting him). It's important to see our own flaws too if we really don't want the story to repeat itself later.
The amount of calm and peacefulness in this woman's voice is unbelievable.
this really made alot of sense and will used for future decision making.
4:23 that fart startled me a bit 😂
I laughed so hard 😂😂😂
I thought I hallucinated that! Bwahahhaha!
I was watching this with despair as my last relationship hit all 12 of these and then a fart noise and I was like, ok yeah- don't be too upset since I can still giggle at a toot noise
Fuck I can't stop laughing 😂
I DIED HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA
Me too😂😂😂😂
Maybe deliver the "but's".
For example: Your relationship feels onesided.
But maybe your lovelanguages are just different. Then link the video.
People want quick answers and leaving the points like that, might help someone to jump to false conclusions.
People already throw away ppl way to fast rather than reflect and fix
This is very true. Me and my partner have different love languages and had to learn to speak each others love language. 😊
Um no. I disagree entirely. People should be throwing partners away *sooner* than later-women especially need to learn this. It’s not my job to “fix” anyone but myself, and I spent too many years dealing with ‘fixer-upper’ men...building their sense of self-worth and making them feel better, but the relationships never improved. Once I got over that and did the work on *myself* I stopped having crappy relationships, and I feel better about myself.
Denise, yeah some people need to hear this side.
But for others this might be their truth. Especially in recent times.
Thts why i want a more diverse video.
So everyone can find their truth.
Yeah. They oversimplify everything but some of those points are just much more than they seem to be.
Completely agree. Me and my husband also have different love languages. So we talk about it. When we are hurt we communicate. We both work at meeting each other's love and affection needs. Also spending too much time together? One thing we have in common that we do together is video games. That requires alot of time spent together lol.
as someone who just got into a relationship and has had my friends tell me of these red flags, I thought they were right. But when I took off and put on the rose-tinted glasses, I saw the same person I liked from the start. Sometimes even better than the start. Love what you do
I was in a relationship about two months ago, though it’s sadly ended. I still love them, but I knew there were problems, and this video does help me see that the relationship was probably not going to keep going at the rate things were. We’re still friends, but I’m not really over it, thought I do hope I’ll get through it.
At the beginning of my relationship, I definitely was the toxic one in the relationship. I know I had exhibited a lot of these points. My partner and I are still together now (almost 3 years) and I know I have definitely changed a lot from the past. However, I still think about whether we're still a good fit together for his sake and should continue dating because of the past. They tell me I have changed a lot for the better, but I still hate myself a lot for the behaviors I used to exhibit
i hope you can forgive yourself 💕
Can you help me? I have just started a relationship and I dont wanna ruin it
What did you use to do wrong? And How have you started to change?
@@CriS-jq6em i might not be the one to post the original comment but i think best thing to do is self reflection. It can show your true actions and discover why you formed the habits you do now. It is important in a relationship to not be you vs. them. You need to listen to them and not get defensive about it. Be honest with yourself on the stuff you have done, be apologetic, and actually attempt to change. On the other end, don't hold back on your own feelings and emotions. Talk through problems and don't avoid them. Problems are inevitbale but healthy couples can tackle them. (through talking and other things). There's also love languages test and apologetic languages tests you both can take so you understand one another. You won't have the best/healthiest relationship overnight, but there's hope!
@@brienna224 fantastic answer Thank you, I’ll take a screenshot😂 have a nice day!!!
Oh my god same situation idk why am i so toxic so clingy idk i have tried to change but now he says he is not emotionally open to me because i hurt him with my actions like fighting all the time idk we have been so much worse than this but i hope i change before its too late . 😔
“Is your partner the only person you see?”
Well yes... we are in a pandemic 😂
Facts
plus not everyone loves to hang out with friends especially they do not have friends they love to hang out to
@@acaken7269 🥲it's the "do not have friends" for me
Going from hitting all points to none is such a relief. Value yourself more and love yourself more. For me it wasn't worth the 5 years I wasted. I bet it's the same for everyone in the same situation
you guys have saved my life multiple times. thank you.
i really think this girl is the one, it’s crazy, we have so much in common and our only real arguments are more debates, never anything mean really, she’s so nice, the timing couldn’t be better, we feel comfortable and safe around one another. i think this is it guys. wish me luck.
How do you feel about it now?
Update?
good luck you got this!!!!!
How is it going now? 7/13/22
What’s the status
1.When they never accept their mistakes..
2.Lying
3.When they don't respect you
Thank you for all the tips! It definitely was great to watch this video (made me even more grateful for how healthy the relationship I’m in is) and read the comments (It’s so amazing how everyone opened up about what they have been through and how it affected them), we are all here for each other :) I would want to ask for your guys’ advice, opinion on a situation I’m dealing with in my relationship. Before, I have to say none of the other signs apply to us and it’s just really healthy. We do have conversations about things that don’t go too well, but those are always good and we be up being beneficial in the future, we never get to bring those things up again as they aren’t an issue anymore after we talk about them. The only big problem that keeps hurting the both of us (actually the 3 of us) is the fact that I don’t like his girl best friend (she is a good friend, interesting person, kind and fun, but I just don’t trust her). I have seen her cheat on her boyfriend right in front of my eyes and she drinks a lot, is very chaotic, which me and my boyfriend aren’t, but he still cares for her because of other qualities of hers, which is fair enough and understandable. I still though have a bad feeling about her and I feel very anxious every time they hang out for a longer while (he told me they made out once one year ago when we weren’t together yet, but he said it definitely didn’t mean anything, that’s also on my mind though, because I found out about it after thinking it might’ve happened, but I was hoping it didn’t). She is a big part of his life, but she sees things very differently than I do and what I feel like is not okay she sees as exaggerating, which creates a bit of a conflict, puts my boyfriend in between, which hurts him too. During a party once she told me I shouldn’t worry about anything, but she was slightly drunk and the conversation was so strange (I still appreciate the fact that she came to me, I know she doesn’t like the situation either). What I am asking you is what do you think is best to do in order to deal with this situation? We are (me and my boyfriend) trying to think of ways to deal with it, but we are not sure what to do and this has been an ongoing conversation for a while now. It hurts the both of us so much we ended up crying several times (he kept telling me we will figure it out, we will end up finding a way and that it will be always, as all he wants is to be with me, but he also said he promised her this will never be between them, won’t ruin their friendship, which is, again, very fair). He doesn’t only tell me, but he always makes me feel how much he wants to be with me. We really want to make this work, but we don’t really know how.. And I definitely understand it can all come from me and my thoughts, but I don’t know how to deal with them really, and it’s not about trust issues, cause I trust him 100%, but I just don’t like her and it makes me feel bad when they are together, which hurts me and hurts him.. What would you do in this situation, under these circumstances?
You said you trust him 100% so I believe you need to let the feeling of hatred towards the girl go away, slide it off, ignore it, since that hatred is negatively affecting your relationship and your mental health, I suggest, you work on this aspect of yours. It's okay to have a different perspective, you may be calm and she maybe chaotic but acknowledge the difference and focus on yourself instead. If he cheats on you that would be his fault and not the girl's fault, so let it go. Focus on yourself.
seven months later, i wonder how that went out. Could you solve the situation?
BTW my reading of the situation is that he should let that friendship go and focus on your relationship, since that's priority.
He can't hang out with her without you present. He cant see her more than twice a month, even thats too high. Its not your fault, it's his. He needs to let her know that you are his wife or about to be if not already, so they both need to keep distance now. If he can't do it, Pack your bags and leave him.
He needs to make decision with you and only you involved. Not a third person who don't give a solitary fu*k about your relationship.
thank you that's make me think about refusing it before starting already.
“The timing isn’t right”
*me nervously laughing during covid*
Relationships can also end due to simple misunderstandings, as I have learned
This is why communication is so important!
That was so beautiful. So much wisdom in there.
This hits so hard. Much needed.
“Sometimes no matter how much you wanna be with someone, the timing just won't allow it” felt that pain but just accept the fact.
Its such a confusing and obsessive pain
Before when me and my girlfriend were first learning that we loved each other we were watching videos from this channel like “How you know you met your soulmate” and took quizzes online about it too, but it didn’t end up lasting but I’m happy we won’t have to feel upset because of each other anymore and we’ll learn to let go and I hope any of you that are going through anything bad in a relationship are able to find inner peace
Ty🤍
If you are taking online quizzes to see if you should be with someone… you shouldn’t be with them… you need to clean your room and grow up. Respectfully 🤠
A lot of these I wish I had known sooner. It takes so much sense as to why the last one didn't work.
I surely, agree to all what you said. Thank you for sharing.
my gf always played the victim, couldnt communicate, seemed like she didnt want to be around me, and our relationship was one- sided. she broke it off with me a while ago, and im glad.
She was cheating
She defo used you. Anyways there's always other fish in the sea. Keep your head up
Indeed
My ex did the same to me, i was not happy when he dumped me but grateful now, kinda
I'm in a relationship currently, and I'd really like to think it's going well, but admittedly, some of these things are what makes me overthink them, especially the spending too much time together bit. Of course we have our breaks for when we have to go to classes, but I feel like maybe that isn't even enough. It'll be our one year anniversary in a week, and I'm so nervous for it
[Edit: thank you everyone for the suggestions and replies! Just letting you know that our anniversary has passed and we're working through our issues quite well! We're still happily together ❤️]
[Edit 2 (March 13th 2023): Thank you all for your suggestions and your stories again. My partner and I have separated just a few weeks ago, but not for ill intent. We both agreed we were just never ready for a relationship as we can barely hold ourselves up. I will admit, it very much hurts, and I miss them a lot. I have hope that things will get better for me, and I'll improve on mental and physical health after this.]
it doesnt have to apply to your specific situation i guess. u can pull it off if everything else is fine
I’m in the same situation except the year has passed and I don’t know how to tell him it’s too much time for me
@@SharaOrianna I was in a situation like that a couple weeks ago, the best thing you can do is be honest with him coz no one wants to be with someone where they ain't all in
I would suggest trying on some days to just hang out with other people, like they have a guys/girls (not assuming or judging) night out or you do.
It is okay to spend loads of time with each other. You have only been together for a year so you are still learning so much about each other. I think that as the relationship progresses it is important to establish independence as far as being okay with spending time without your significant other and not feeling like you absolutely have to be with them 24/7. Overthinking it is never good though, I’d say just do what you enjoy and don’t think about it too much. Relationships are all so different and there is no right or wrong way to establish them.
oh healthy and clear communication definitely needs to be a focus.
This video appeared 3 days late on my feed.
I am in the process of moving on and I will use this if I ever get the confidence to feel emotions again in the future.
The sign before the signs: you're watching this video.
Well no. It was recommended cause I watched a dif video from then
Nah, I just saw this in my feed and though "This could be useful in the future"
You ain't wrong 😂
nah im watching it so i can watch as how me and my boyfriend dont match any of these signs
@@Jesus-christ05 😂
some of these apply to platonic relationships as well, I used to have a really toxic friend who did most of this stuff and I was kind of blind to it for most of our friendship, right up until the end, it really made me think about what true friendship values should be
Basically the opposite
All of these really hit home. I can't do this with her anymore, I give up.
after watching this video, i can surely say our relationship can last forever.
thankyou,
no mentioned points matched for us,
ACC to video our relationship will last longer
but in reality most probably family won't accept it.
anyway I'll try my best to make her mine.