THE TRUTH ABOUT THE FRIENDZONE | why it's not a bad thing
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 4 ส.ค. 2024
- Ever heard the phrase "if you stand too close to the trees that you'll miss the forrest"? That phrase always confused me lol, but I think it applies here to our video... A lot of what Tori and I are talking about here in this video is that we can be too emotionally attached to the present moment that we fail to see the bigger picture of our lives. I love the idea of being "in the moment" but if it causes you to be an emotional wreck where you can't focus on anything else then that should be a red flag that maybe you need a new perspective... It is so easy to get caught up in our feelings and we need voices of accountability and trust to help us discern what is true and what false. That voice can be from our peers, mentors, the Holy Spirit, and even ourselves if we can train ourselves to remember the truth. Tori and I will probably do a video on how to keep a bigger perspective in the moments when our brains run wild because we know just as good as anyone what it feels like to lose hope in our dreams and hopes. Thanks for all the love on our new website! Don't forget we will be posting some easter eggs there with hints of what we are working on behind the scenes and to sign up for our email list as those people get first dibs on everything!
We love yall mucho mi armors! lol
-Chad & Tori
Tori IG:
/ torimasters
Chad IG:
/ chadmasters
Our Website:
www.toriandchad.com/
Our Mailbox Box:
2161 E County Rd 540a
#144
Lakeland, FL 33813
p.s. If you are reading this, get ready for a surprise tomorrow! :)
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SATURDAYZZZ ARE FOR THE TH-cam FAM!
yaaahooo!!💖💖
I’m turning 32 in a few days. I’m single and was feeling the birthday blues. Song of Solomon 8:4 made me cry and this video gave me a different perspective about waiting on God.
Also love the end “when did being friends become a bad thing?” oof so good. Jesus calls us friends and it’s the best thing ever
amen to that!!!
"We were just friends but that doesn't mean I didn't look at her and think that she's a dimepiece."
We in the friend zone feel this Chad.
hahahah love this!
God's timing is perfect. Even the timing of this video! I'm currently in a situation almost identical to what you guys went through and the wait is hard. Thank you both for being obedient to the Lord and for sharing the things God puts on your heart! I needed it.
Thanks for the love Taylor! It means so much!
Yes, same! I’m in almost similar situation. Friend zoned but feel it’s part of God’s journey. We still are in touch and value each other, long distance. It’s not easy but I’m glad to hear your story!
Having to friend zone your husband until God says Go.
There are so many gems in this video!!!! Thank you, this is so helpful
Thanks for watching it!
Thank you so much for making your descriptions so meaningful! It just makes my day❤️ So excited for tomorrow's surprise 🤩
thanks for taking the time to read them!!! It means a lot!
I needed this! Thank you guys. God is so good🙌🏼💗
Literally, I loved it . All of it .
Thank you so much for the wonderful message 😊 ❤
Thanks for saying that! You're a gem!
Wow, really needed this message right now. Gods timing is perfect timing! Thank you and God bless!
Happy it helped! God bless you!
Thank y’all for always being so sweet and thoughtful with what you put into the world! It gives me hope that there ARE kind loving godly people out there unlike what media and society say. I really needed a new perspective and I’m working on that, but when y’all mentioned how God will fill that Void and no one else can it stuck to me and to how we need to crave gods love and confide in him before all else 🥰 thanks for being such positive souls
Much love from Lakeland
Love you! Happy to have you a part of the fam!
It's crazy how you guys are always speaking into my life without even knowing me! Thank youuuu ❤
We love getting to be in your life and you in ours!!!
Dang, this is so encouraging!! Thank you so much for allowing the Lord to use you both!
thank you for engaging with our videos!
this is such a much needed video for me. thank yall so much.
Love hearing that, Emma!
So grateful I found your channel!! I love you guys and love your wisdom and advice! It's been so helpful in my season of dating 💕
We are so thankful you found our channel as well!
I love you guys!!! Y'all are seriously a huge blessing, wish everyone knew about your channel!
hahah we are happy that you know about our channel! It will grow or not, but we truly have the most supportive and positive audience !
i always love reading the description box you guys always post like literally it was on fire (not literally but metaphorically). love how deep you explain things in such a way that people reading it would be impacted in a good way. what i love about the video is how your understanding of friendzone was in a more positive response . mostly people would take it negatively but i love how you are both mature to handle it and understand that there are factors that really do leads to those kind of circumstances in such a way that this thing called “friendzone” needed to happen in order to avoid greater chaos and probably a way to save something more precious to you at that time. i mean valuing whats built within instead of gambling yourselves into temporary romantic relationships when you’re not prepared at that time. love how you guys discuss different types of love, but most of all, i love the tiny hands in the first part of the video lol. anyways, love that tori discussed the timing thing because even though we might meet the right person , it isnt worth pursuing if you meet them at a wrong time. sometimes if you pursue something where timing is not in the favor, it may complicate or worse is it might ruin what you had with that person. love how smart you guys explains things. and also you upload early love it lol and nice fan video at the end 🐢🐨
hahah it could've been literally! Tori did burn her breakfast! hahah LOVE WHAT YOU JUST SAID! "valuing whats built within instead of gambling yourselves into temporary romantic relationships..." holy cow that's good! We love you, Monique!
@@ToriAndChad trust me, i dont even know where in the world did i get those scholarly response that you loved haha. Love you hoomans 🐢🐨 congrats on the website
YES we need to see the videos on friendship boundaries! There's so many relationship boundaries videos and opinions but I really need to know how to have healthy friendship boundaries as well!
We are going to do an entire series on these!
@@ToriAndChadAny update on friendship boundaries ? Had there been a video yet? I would love to see a video on this topic.
YES!!! I hope Chad is writing that book!!! Also, could you do a video on the different types of boundaries for different stages of dating. Friends, dating/courting, engaged, & married? 💕💕
Yes we should do an entire series!
Oh my gosh.. the timing of this video is perfect for me 😫. There’s a guy I feel like could be perfect for me but I’m in such a bad place right now and so is he. I’m trying to focus on my relationship with God more than I focus on what might or might not happen there. Man. The wait is hard but the reward is worth it :)❤️ (Also Tori definitely needs to pie Chad in the face when he’s not expecting it 👀)
Love that you are staying positive the the wait is worth it!!!
I totally needed this! I always looovvveeee your videos. Thank you both for being amazing vessels of God. I'm very sure you will be as blessed as we(I) am evry time I watch your videos!!
You're so kind, Melody!
I can't miss one of your videos so I had to click on this one too even though I have no experience in the friend zone or putting someone there! At first I was bummed because feeling inexperienced in the dating department (I've been on 1 date in 23 years, although I learned recently that on first impression people are sure that I have all the guys lol) is an insecurity of mine that's become prevalent during Covid. BUT, as I'm typing this the Lord is reminding me that I wasn't ready for a healthy relationship for so many reasons. It took me 9 years to heal and forgive and now that I have I'm BEYOND grateful for the Lord protecting me from hurting others and being hurt by them too!! There's so many people in this world who settle for something mediocre and I appreciate you mentioning that it's worth the wait! I finally can say that I'd rather live my entire life single and in relationship with Christ than to end up with the wrong person because of my own selfish desires - huge victory (thank you Lord)!
Also, SUPER PUMPED about the surprise tomorrow (hoping it's merch) and your new website! Best believe I'll be on the egg hunt!
Thanks for being yourselves always!
Chad, I hope you are less stressed and feeling better! - Jess
Dang thanks for being willing to share all of that Jessica! So cool to see God move in your heart and that big lesson you learned! that is huge and we all need to learn that! Hope you liked today's surprise video!!! I am feeling much better by the way!
@@ToriAndChad LOVED today's surprise video! Glad you're feeling better Chad!!
This is was SO GOOD!! thank you guys for sharing so much truth and wisdom from God!! Can't wait for the next videos!! Loved this one spoke to me so much!!
We love that you liked this video!!!! yay!
i needed this so badly🥺 thank you guys!❤️
Thanks for the love!!!
You posted this 4 months ago. And 4 months ago, this meant something to someone.
And 4 months later, it now means something to me.
Gods timing is absolutely marvelous.
Keep creating content. You never know who will need to hear your sweet wisdom and words.
Whether it’s in your moment, or its in someone’s future moment.
Influence never dies.
All love from a fellow Floridian♥️
Love you so much thank you for this sweet encouragement!!! 😊💕
I loved this video!! Thanks so much for sharing about your own experiences and for giving such good advice, especially pointing back to God in all of it! I also loved the devotional you shared. Our foundation, our satisfaction and completion should be based on God and his abundant, unconditional love for us. And in his perfect timing he'll bring us that person that complements us--God makes everything beautiful in his timing! 😊 Thanks for all the awesome thoughts as always, and I'm excited for you guys and all that's to come! The website is lovely 🤩
AMEN! Yes girl! Thanks for sharing that!
Yes -- a healthy boundaries one would be so helpful. This was helpful and gives me hope. And yes, totally agree that God's love needs to fill you first.
We can't wait to work on those videos!
You guys are AWESOME! Love how you both share from experiences. So grateful to God for both your lives! Also I'm looking forward to Chad's new book😖 plus all the amazing contents you guys are creating for the website and TH-cam videos ☺
You're awesome! Thanks for commenting and encouraging us!
You 2 are so awesome. There would be so many more happy relationships if people followed the Biblical counsel and waited on God; like you 2 did. Praise God and thank you for sharing your testimony and advice; you always amaze me on how wise you 2 are for such a young couple.
You're so kind! Thank you for being so supportive!
Tori is so guilty every time she hears the word friendzone looks so cute 🤣
HAHAH Yes she does!
Love y’all so much! So glad I found your channel
We are so happy you found us too!
@@ToriAndChad y’all are so encouraging and I look up to y’all so much.
I really needed this today! I've been in such a weird place recently and your faith in God really just reminded me what I have been missing. I feel like I've been in such of something and now I realize it's that feeling of God's love and just being filled by God. so Thank you so much for always being consistent!
Awww we love that! thanks for sharing this!
This is so awesome! Thank you both for sharing amazing content!!
Thanks for taking the time to watch it!!!
@@ToriAndChad It's my pleasure! I am so grateful to you both! Blessings!
You guys are such a blessing!
You are a blessing to us!
I love this so much guys you guys are so on point when talking about relationships!!! The different types of love are so good to base yo relationship on and loving others around and and loving God is good prep before marriage ❤️
Love that you liked this video!
Please do a video on what boundaries look like in those different “Friend Zones” ! I’m currently in a season of singleness and it’s where God has called me to be. Sometimes I question myself because I’m not sure what those boundaries should look like. Love y’all🤍
YES THAT IS COMING! Love you!
@@ToriAndChad Yes! Thank you.
Love you guys❤❤Also,waiting for the surprise!I always read the whole description🤗Along with your videos,your description are also perfect👌Your videos make me feel like I am talking to a friend.God protect you guys always❤
hahah thanks for reading the entire thing!!! You are so supportive and we appreciate all your love!
@@ToriAndChad You guys teach me something new in every video❤Thank you for being thoughtful and loving to your followers and subscribers always.Much love.❤
We are able to make videos like these because people like you!
@@ToriAndChad awwwee❤🥺So sweet of guys.
AMEN ,
Awww you're an angel! lol He does have perfect timing!!!
I'm so excited to watch the video 🤭🤭!! Also I'm here within the first hour ❤️
Hope you liked it!
We love you guys and excited for this video ❤️
Hope you like it!
I lovee your videos!!! I love how you guys are so honest and cuteee. Btw thanks to jess and gabriel for "introducing" me to you guys :)))
🔥🔥🔥The pure message of the love of God in this video is it for me😍😍😭
The love and support in this comment is it for me!
omg please do the boundaries for friends! lol love the title of Chad’s book “how to get out of the friend zone, a success story” 😂 (chapter 2 stay in touch 😅)
We are working on those!
Yes! Loved this video! And please do a part two on boundaries with being in the friendzone.
We are working on this one!!!
Tori and Chad Masters so excited!!! Can’t wait
Im so happy yall uploaded cause my week has been horrible. 😭
hope this is a little bit of good in your week! Sorry this week hasn't been good at all
Thank u so much!
Great video guys! I found it really truthful!
Thanks for the love, Shaughn!
every time I watch you guys, its like I'm a new better person !!!!!!!!
well that's the best compliment ever! lol
@@ToriAndChad oh yess 😍
So beautifully explained 💛
Thanks for the love!
Wow . This blessed me
dis z da frst tym im soo early......luv uu guysss.....was feeling soo dull😑😑, saw ur video im happy and excited😘😍
awww that means a lot!
You guys are so amazing and love how much you talk about Jesus
Aww thanks for saying that, Jessica!
Excited for the supriiiseeeee
:) us too!
1st of all i'm soo ready for tomorrow.. i liked the video and the topic, especially how well you guys explained it. We all tend to get hurt when things dnt go our way bt we need to look what message God is trynna give us, what He want us to learn and be ready to see things the way they actually are and not the way we want them to be. Always loving the content you guys put 💝💝
Hope you liked the video today! it was short and sweet! lol Thanks for the love on this video!
@@ToriAndChad Obviously saw it. Left a comment too 🧏♀️
LETSSSS GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
JUST FINISHED VIDEO FINNA READ THE BIO BUT RN SO HYPED BC LIKE AHHHHHHHHHH LETS GO JESUUUUUS!!! #TEAMJESUS #YES.
#hypedforthesurprisetomorrow #yo #gonnastopusinghashtags... ok so yo that’s so true when did being friends become a bad thing. #contentment DANG. Ok yo. So like. What a gift friendship is. And dude Chad, when u liked Tori while she wasn’t vibing with physical/romantic intimacy..... what a treasure that season was... aye??! Like. That’s where I am rn and God has revealed that to me. Thanks God.
Anyway- y’all are awesome.
Definitely maybe living in the moment. :)
hahah thanks for the love dude!
boundaries video!!! especially about boundaries in dating to the person you're going to marry!
yes! That is coming!
Lethargy- state of tiredness or lack of energy hehe gotchu Chad!! And we love a bts vid 🤍
We can't wait to work on that!!!
Tiny hands on your toes 😂 so funny lol excited to watch thiisssss
hahah whooops
would love a podcast from you guys! we need more Christian couples podcasts :D
hang in there! We are working on some stuff! Make sure you are subscribed on our website email list for those updates!
OMG! This is me right now. I friend-zoned my guy friend three times. It's hurtful, but this hurt will easily go away compared to the hurt if we go in a relationship and it ends badly.
It hurts him way more being friend-zoned 3 times by you then it hurts you friend-zoning him 3 times.
Take a leap of faith already, staying in your safe “friend” space is pain free for you, but it still hurts him. At least if you take that leap, it will end up equally for both of you, regardless of the outcome.
Yeah seriously! When did being friends become a bad thing? I wish it could be more of a thing between Brothers and Sisters in Christ. 🤷🏻♀️
Thanks for the video! Such a good reminder!
Yes, Tori, you should pie Chad in the face😂 And a “behind the scenes” video would be so cool!
Yeah, I'm not sure when it did, but it may because their is such an idolatry of relationships.
Tori and Chad Masters whoa, yeah. That would make a lot of sense.
I think the whole friendzone thing emerged out of the “manosphere” groups. In the early 2000s online communities of men who felt women rejected them for a variety of reasons formed to discuss their dating and relationship frustrations. They quickly turned into a backlash against feminism, especially the radical feminism ideas and became areas promoting very angry and violent desires against women too. Ironically enough the actual term originates with an episode of Friends and had nothing to do with such attitudes.
Well it's not a bad thing if they agree with each other to be ONLY platonic friends. However if a guy is looking for relationship prospects and he is rejected but offered the consolation prize "friendship" then staying friends is a waste of time, distracting him from the goal. Best thing is to do is walk away.
Thank you for answering my question.
what question?
@@ToriAndChad The one was at the beginning of the video.
I can hear Chad out loud while I'm reading the description hahah❤️
hahah that is my goal! I want it to feel like you are talking with me!
Thank u for the videos, they are full of wisdom and inspiring! I liked this one particularly. I am afraid that I won't know how to get a guy out of the friendzone and when the right timing for this is. How Can one know?
Well for Tori it involved a lot of prayer and for me it involved me letting go and not knowing what would happen but being happy as I was... So I know that doesn't "help" but keeping worshipping God and spending so much time with God that the only reason you look away is because God says there he is!
Ahhhh man If only I could spend a day with you guys my IQ levels would be skyrocketing😂thank you for sharing your wisdom I promise everything you're saying is getting engraved in my brain💓
Well the only reason we have stuff to share is because we learned it from other people or we learned from experience! hahah
If something is meant to be then it’ll be through God only if you give your life to Him. Keep praying. He is powerful and nothing can stop Him. He has your best interest at heart for you. Trust in Him xo
Love this! Does anyone know where the love letter Tori is reading out loud is from? :)
It's from the Thrive Bible! :)
Chad, im going through nearly the exact same thing as you. Its been almost 5 years for me...
could you talk more about keeping in touch and boundaries. i feel like im doing the all reaching out but as a man i know thats my duty to provide consistency and love unconditionally. She has put me in the friendzone twice as well! this is too bizarre
5 years? At some point you have to either accept your status as a friend or just wk away. If you're doing all the initiating that should be a sign that things are very 1 sided.
At the time 8:10 in this video, you are talking about thrive bible? I thought it sounds interesting, what is that and from which website can you order it?
I think they just came out with new ones on Amazon!!!
It gave me hope 🙋🙋🙋
You’re a brave man Chad. I thought being in the friendzone is emotionally unhealthy. If the other person dates and ends up marrying someone else wouldn’t that crush you? Thanks for sharing y’all’s story though!
the friendzone sucks when you want to bonk her but she only invites you over to move furniture. throwing your own back out is not the goal.
I think that Chad needs to explain to men that it's normal and healthy for men and women to be friends especially if he's pursuing her as she shouldn't be 'easy'.
I see the main issue is that a person wants to date the other and it isn’t reciprocated. So they don’t want to remain friends in “hope” that it will happen, which can make it difficult to stay friends if he/she has romantic feelings.
I have unfortunately been in the friend zone many times in my life. My problem was that I was put in that category of “the nice guy” It’s tough out there especially if you want to meet girls at church. They are the worst ones for it. I don’t mean to bring negativity to the comment section guys, that’s just my personal experience.
Guys, If you look like Chad, don't be afraid of the friendzone! Let's be honest, Chad is very good-looking, so he prob knew Tori had feelings for him when she friendzoned him :)) not everyone can get out of the friend zone, it's important to mention that! Maybe the person is not attracted to you at all and really wants to be just friends, that's why you are in the friendzone. Also, Chad says I nthd video that he was OK with being just friends with Tori, because he wanted her to be in his life even if they were just friends. But I feel like he was just hanging on the outskirts, testing the waters, waiting on the crack in the door, hoping and praying that she would change her mind 😃😀he didn't want to be just friends
"moist" love.. 😂
lord. hahah so gross
Chad, I have a question for you: how did you set aside your feeling for Tori as you were friend zoned? I was recently friend zoned and the woman I was seeing wants to still hang out. I want to as well, but I’m struggling with setting aside my feeling to do that genuinely at the moment
She is not entitled to friendship. Just like how you are not entitled to a relationship. You don't get what you want. LEAVE. Just like she leaves if she doesn't get what she wants.
I dont want to miss yalls first email! When do you think you'll send it out? Love you guys!!
We are working on bi-weekly emails! But have you gotten the welcome email???
@@ToriAndChad hmm no. I will definitely resign up cant wait for your emails 😊 you guys rock!
Where did you get that bible? The love letter was so sweet 🥺
It's the Thrive bible! new ones come out in November!
Chapter two "Stay in Touch", but no physically
hahaha
Would love some advice on healthy boundaries for one person that is ready to date but the other one isn’t right now.
yes we are working on these!
I've never been so early in my life
hahah we are proud of you!
Where did you read that from?
Read what from???
I love how Chad says "I'm not gonna talk to much" and then spends the first 5 minutes of the video talking 🤣
hahahah my bad!
Women love the men they have in the frienzone because they offer them unlimited validation without ever having to really reciprocate
Why am I hearing (from a vid before) Chad say, "COME BACK INTO THE PICTURE, JUST LIKE I DID" !!!!!!!!!!!😂😂😂
hahah Dang I can remember daying that!
@@ToriAndChad yesss😂😂😂
I just ghosted him because I got friendzoned for too long (he also has a gf). I am getting my power and self-esteem back!
So good this video! Would love a bounderies video 🤍 this whole video gives me hope that God will write my lovestory :)
Amen!
Why do I feel like its like god speaking to Saint Faustina? “My beloved daughter” part!
Amen!
Cook Chad a pie! But don’t pie Chad! I got you bro! Lel ;)
YES AND AMEN!
Question for Tori: in the gap of time between putting Chad in the friendzone (the first time, but also the second time) and the two of you getting together, did you date any other guys? Or were you single throughout that entire time.
Could also ask Chad that too, did he take interest in anyone else or was he hung up on Tori?
@@Murph_gaming That's a great point, I think I was personally more curious at the time in the woman's side of things. Women tend to have more men pursuing them at any given time then men have women interested in/pursuing them. I wanted to establish whether or not that was accurate in Tori's case, then follow up with how/if those experiences impacted her decision to move Chad "out" of the friendzone.
@@samcashdan1255 I mean I would venture to say that she probably did at least have other men interested in her, doesn't mean she felt the same about them.
@@Murph_gaming Haha for sure. Well, let's let her respond if she ever deems it a question worth a response, and if not, no big deal.
This video is not reflective of the real world. If someone puts you in the friend zone, then have the self-respect to walk away. It’s not fair to you at all to stifle your feelings and desire for them while having a front row seat to watch other men who she thought were better than you get a chance that you never got. She’s entitled to entertain men she’s attracted to, and you are entitled to walk away and not subject yourself to that kind of emotional torture. Regardless of gender this should be practiced by everybody.
You to are so cute together take care
That’s like saying “those of you that have been water boarded, that you shouldn’t lol at that in a normal light. It’s cowardly rejection. They aren’t brave enough to just say no combined with a need for the validation they can receive so they keep him/her around and the detriment of their emotional state. I used to believe so much that men and women could be lifelong friends. I’ve been shown otherwise. They cannot be. I was in until you brought in religion. Peace out..
Didn't you want to be with Tori even when she put you in the friendzone and seemingly didn't want to be with you? Your feelings toward the other person don't change even if they don't feel the same way about you.
8:20 - 9:56
Imma get deep here but what if I have already gone in the wrong order? I don't think I went into the relationship with the wrong intentions but it just seems like a mess!! Ahh it's crazy because I really care about this person but I don't think we're following God's timeline :/
well to be honest with you, that is the human condition.. where we seek our own timeline rather than God's so that is completely normal... For Tori and I when we crossed the line, we had to come together and ask for forgiveness under God and work on focusing on what was important to a future marriage.. It takes a commitment to go about it that way but it's totally possible!
UGH I was put in the friendzone and I took him off of Facebook for nine months before friending him back. xD
#notreally 😂😂😂
lol wut?
@@ToriAndChad It was at the beginning of the video. Chad was saying he wasn't going to talk much in the video and it popped up on the screen "#notreally". Which was true because Chad spoke a lot 😂
Hi❤
hey
Yo, I’m also a Christian, Twenty One Pilots fan