I KNOW THIS VIDEO IS FULL OF IMPORTANT AND INTERESTING INFORMATION BUT IF I DONT GET THE MAKEUP TUTORIAL SO HELP ME KYA I WILL CARBONATE ALL THE MILK CURRENTLY IN YOUR FRIDGE
The "layers of identity around the fragmented memory" kind of reminds me of how a tree grows around things stuck in it. You can't just pull them out without some serious work that might hurt the outside of the tree more to uncover it depending on how buried and large it is, but the fact that the tree could grow like that at all and overtake what tried to pierce it just shows its resiliency
to me it sounds absolutely impossible to live a life with that many alters in a system. is it as bad as it seems like? or is it just as hard as living with like 10-20 altars? im aware that it really differs from system to system and that for some people 5 might already be impossible to deal with while others might funtion realtivly well with 12. but to me the difference between 10-20 and 400 seems huge. please let me know if you feel very umcomfortable with this question. i still need to learn what is ok to ask and what isnt. i will remove it if needed.
@@rikavanderhofstad its not purely dysfunctional, it's a bit rude to assume that. its hard but every alter is necessary to survive, my system is like my family, id choose no one over them. how hard it is depends on who you ask but its never easy, no two systems are the same
How have you been able to track how many alters you have? As a system with 9, it feels like it would be almost impossible to have a body count with that many. Do you have a chart with everyone on it or do you just store it mentally. Im not trying to be rude or anything, im just really curious
We're polyfragmented with 300+ alters and three other subsystems/layers/"cities" that we know of. We've only recently been able to bridge the gap enough to start communicating consciously with them and let them front. It's been quite a ride because they have a different set of traumas they're dealing with compared to us on the top layer.
As a singlet, it is both incredibly fascinating and deeply troubling to see just how far the mind will go to make sense of and remove itself from traumatic events. I hope that, as processing continues and especially since Omega has been coming to front much more recently, that perhaps the subsystem will become more comfortable communicating, or maybe even allow you, Kya, access in some way, if they feel as though you’re ready. If nothing else, hopefully Sally can forge a stronger connection, since there’s already more between them and her than most of if not all of the alters in the main system. I also hope that these types of comments, which I make pretty frequently, aren’t upsetting. I could see how it could be interpreted as me pushing you all towards fusion or trying to rush your integration, but that couldn’t be further from what I want. All I want is to see you guys be able to reach a stable, comfortable, and hopefully mostly happy existence, whatever that means for your system, and I’ll be here for as long as that takes, and I’ll continue to watch afterwards to see what you guys are capable of when you don’t have to focus on trauma processing. Lots of love, all, and don’t forget to drink your water💜
As a person who's been here since Chloe was host, it is so crazy realizing how much your guys' recovery and new experiences impact the system. I remember Chloe being in the dark about a lot more and Kya seems to have learned a lot from the past few years they went through. I just wanted to thank you from the bottom of my heart that you are still here and on TH-cam, educating people about something that not a lot of people know enough about. It has helped me personally and I always try to educate people a little whenever the topic comes up!
I have also been here since Chloe was host and I'm on the same page! I see so much growth and I've learned so much. I try to spread the knowledge whenever I can. :)
@@sophialavreniouk6110 There is no one true personality, so no, Chloe wasn't the 'original' host. The *name* Chloe may be the body's birth name, but I'm unsure of that. If a person has DID, experiencing new or different trauma can cause them to fragment, meaning new alters to split off and come into being. Afaik, this happened for the Dissociadid system around 2020. The opposite of that process is called integration, which is when the amnesia barriers between two alters degrade and they eventually turn into one. There are some videos on their channel detailing two instances of integration, or fusion, of alters that happened in order to create Kya. First, Chloe and Nina fused into Nin. Then, a while later (for a more exact timeline, see their videos), Nin and Kyle integrated over many months to become Kya. Kya remembers being both of them, and has memories each one had, but while combining aspects of each one they've become their own person. So, technically Chloe is still there, and so are Nina, Nin and Kyle, as parts of Kya - but there is also Kya themself, more than the sum of their parts. Hope that helps!
I'm proud of you, both saying this to Kya and the system as a whole. You've come incredibly far, good job. I know you have the strength in you to keep going
@@DissociaDID Yes! Thank you for every video ❤ Please also make sure to rest and not push yourself too much! Glad to see the progression you’ve made and are making. I strive to do the same when I can 😊
A very active amygdala is one change you'll see! The amygdala is, simply put, involved in assessing threats, and emotional memories. You'll also commonly see a hypoactive hippocampus, which is involved in storing long-term memory. A damaged hippocampus will also commonly release excess cortisol (stress hormone).
@@jessthoma2803 oh yeah! Now I remember watching something about that. I wonder if there’s a discernible difference for that between ADHD/neurodivergent brains (I sort of recall something about how these tend to have overactive amygdala/it’s triggered often) vs brains experiencing long lasting trauma vs if they are both. Do you know why the hippocampus would be less active during these times? I figured that it would store the memories since the brain seems to prioritize negative experiences to better prepare for survival in future instances.
@@bubbiccino Just from my limited research, it looks like high cortisol levels actually damage the hippocampus over time, making it visibly smaller than those without PTSD/trauma disorders. So it sounds like the misremembering and amnesia is more-so a side effect of high cortisol levels from the trauma itself? And then that becomes a defense mechanism in those with DID etc? Guessing, not a professional ✋
I love the tiny moments where you can really see or hear the bits of Kyle and Nin and Chloe and Nina still present in your fabulous host! Thank you so much Kya and all of the system, your videos always put a smile on my face as you find brightness even in your darkest hours ❤
Its incredible how the human brain is able to fragment into so many parts and manage to keep up with all of them on a subconscious level. It really is a testament to you dont know how strong you really are til you prove it to yourself and youve definitely proven you are very strong, and even through the chaos, you know what youre doing.
Heya, we're in the process of being diagnosed with DID, and your videos have really helped alot of us out in this rather rough time. So thank you so much 💜💜💜
Thank you, your videos have been very important for our system (we used to call ourselves the spiritual system) I was diagnosed in 2019 and got kicked out and was homeless for 6 months, that experience made our system go into a hiding state, and it's been almost 4 years since we even been able to think about everything that happened during that time without being triggered.
@@DissociaDID we came up on top fortunately, even though I've had to slowly build myself to even be able to watch things like your videos again without going into a trigger episode. Chloe (host at the time) helped me through a lot of discovery on my personal journey and reach out for help for my diagnosis back then. In part I'll always be eternally thankful for
I loved that old video from Chloe back in the day where she tried to make your inner world mansion as she understood it in the Sims. Inner world stuff is so fascinating to me. We're all so grateful that you and your system share what you do.
Ive been watching this channel for over a year now and it has helped me through hard times and processing a traumatic event. I don't think I would have been able to get through my gsces without the help from this channel. Thank you to the whole system for encouraging me and helping me put myself first.
I don’t have DID but one of my friends has it and ive been watching you for awhile just to understand the disorder. The more I learn the more sad it is and realizing the horrible trauma that happened to each of the systems that exists. I have my own ptsd and bipolar but nothing to this level. Thank you for educating me.
As a singlet, I want to take the time and say I appreciate and honor the vulnerability you have been putting in your most recent videos. I can't imagine how hard it is sometimes to press the "submit" button. I appreciate, see and hear the work you have done.
I love this comment. Don't know why, just the last part was reassuring somehow and we have not heard that comment on here before -A lot in the front rn
@@eversystemm Thank you. It is a very genuine statement. I would hope people who know me would see how much work I've put into my own therapy and appreciate that. We don't ask for appreciation, but hearing it means they see the work done.
@@DissociaDID nearly !! polyfragmentation isn't just based on alter count- it's based on the complexity of the dissociation, internal structure and more !! - little ex host
@@moondropcollectivewe plan to do a full video explaining this in detail! Was a a bit too much for one video so we had to simplify it - we cut this down from about 40 minutes raw. Thank you for clarifying though we will make sure to stress this in the video we make!! ❤
Just wanted to show some support and hope this helps in a little way to help provide things you and your babies (Serafina, Mango, Guinea pigs) need. Thank you as always for helping to educate people. I look forward to your videos every week! Hope you are safe and well and always stay true to you. Much love & support always! 💕
Ive found out im a osdd system from watching your content and i cant be more grateful. Your videos have gone from interesting to actually helpful in day to day life over the years. Ive have been making huge progress in healing and recently have finally gotten to a point that I dont feel like im faking it 100% of the time. Thank you for everything❤❤❤
i don't remember how i stumbled upon your channel in the first place, but i'm quite glad that i did. your videos are so fascinating and very interesting (coming from a psychology nerd). it always amazes me how the brain works to survive. what the lengths the brain will go to to survive and deal with the world around it
Hey, I just wanted to take a moment to thank you and everyone who's sharing their experience. It's not easy to do so in a place where a bunch of strangers can and sometimes will attempt to invalidate your experience. So thanks to you and everyone in the comments for educating people like me, sharing your experiences and awsering (sometimes stupid) questions. It's greatly appreciated.
there's something about learning littles can also be persecutors, that absolutely breaks my heart. that poor baby :( thank you for sharing what you've learned of your subsystem, kya! the brain is so endlessly complex and resourceful in how it protects us. 💜
I really wonder how they go about counting 4000 alters. Did some members of the system count them? Do they just inherently know somehow? Did psychologists find a way to count them? Did they just compile numbers and names and built up a list of 4000? That would be an insanely huge endeavour. Wow.
HC-DID systems are the ones with high numbers of alters, HC-DID systems are programmed from RAMCOA (ritual abuse mind control and organized abuse) and oftentimes there's an alter programmed that compiles information about the system for the programmer to use to keep tabs on it etc. a lot of HC-DID systems have like,, an "archive" alter that knows the number of alters present.
It depends on the system! In most cases, it’s typically because someone’ll document every alter they come across upon building communication. It is typically pretty hard to do and manage whenever your system is large like that. So, that combined with estimation, can give you that number.
honestly i can see how that’s possible with technology nowadays! definitely time consuming, but i see lots of systems use discord/messaging apps/notes, which could theoretically keep track of alters infinitely!
@@ryguy56 It would. But four thousand is a pretty big server. And keeping track of littles or any other alter that might not want or be able to leave messages has got to be quite a puzzle. Props to them! 😅
I don't have DiD but I suffer with Adhd and derealization, and you guys literally described the white bright wall that I used to see when I was kid to "crossed it" when I was feeling stressed/sad. I'm considering going back to therapy to find a reason for that thanks to you guys! I hope you all can help more people with this channel. Btw you guys know acrylic and aether system right? I immediately thought about them. Lots of love and hope to everyone in the system!💕
I love you guys. Even though I don’t have DID or know anyone that does, I always find the information you give very insightful. Thank you for doing what you are doing I know you are helping so many people! ❤
we have a pretty far-separated group of alters (whether or not they’d be considered a subsystem is up for debate) and while we aren’t in a space to really reach out and deal with those trauma memories, i’ll make sure i leave a note for us to check this video out again when we’re ready for that! tysm as always for the work you’re doing, it’s so helpful for us and so many other system 💖 -nikolai
@@DissociaDID I just finished watching and wow, that is a lot of information. Thank you for sharing what you know. I find it very helpful you explain as much as you're comfortable with. I'm sure a million people have told you this (You have that many subscribers, after all) but your videos have been a hude inspiration and way to feel less alone in my own healing. Especially when you speak about living with the memory gaps. Compared to you I am quite the old lady, but I have learned so much about being kinder to myself in dealing with my trauma through you. You make me want to keep learning and working on my own health because you have managed to over come so much. Thank you existing, as difficult as it has been, and thank you for still having the courage to make videos.
Hey! I recently (kind of sort of) became aware of a bunch of littles and teens who, thanks to your video, seem to be their own subsystem. I didn’t know subsystems could be different to the ‘nesting doll’ type you explained. Thank you for helping me to figure that out, I was so confused for a hot minute there and now I have a direction to move in. Thank you again, please keep making videos they are so incredibly helpful 💕💕 -JJ
As you’re talking about your DID, I thought of a filing cabinet. Like the body is a filing cabinet and each for the systems and subsystems are the drawers and the files in the drawers are the alters.
I'm a single entity in this body, but this video has reminded me about my own healing and trauma responses. A few years ago, I thought I was doing well (and I am), but I'm only just realising the depth of how far it goes. I'm only now starting to get into the how's and whys of my feelings and reactions. (On a possitive note, I'm finally starting to remember Before memories from when I was little :D )
Our minds are truly something extraordinary, aren't they? It's mind-boggling to think about the complexity and sheer beauty of our brains. They're like these magical labyrinths, safeguarding our thoughts and emotions until our very last moments. It's just mind-blowing, really. Our minds, resilient and unyielding, demonstrate the incredible power within us. It's like witnessing a breathtaking symphony, where our thoughts dance and intertwine, revealing the wonders of our existence.
When, in a previous video, you talked a little about sub-systems and your sub-system I imagined it as a secret door hidden behind a bookshelf in a house that leads to a completely new hidden house. I don’t know how accurate this is but I wanted to thank you for this video as it is very informative and it showcases topics that need to be heard. Thank you and I hope you have an amazing week! ❤❤❤
I love Kaya, I loved Nin and her clarity to the channel but I see a new fierceness here. To see Nin & Kyle combine in my last view was so emotional. I travelled here from my BPD diagnosis and I just want to say all the love to you for doing what you do and doing it better than I’m coping with much less. Much respect to you girl for your acceptance courage and still moving fwd with understanding and purpose
I get so sad when the video ends on the more explainer-y videos, you’re so articulate and knowledgeable and it’s very soothing to me (even when the subject is the opposite). You go through everything and leave no stone unturned, but I’d still always like to spend a little more time in your video world!
This is so much important information. As someone who does not have DID but does have CPTSD and amnesia from trauma, I can relate to forgetting about the memories and trying to piece them together. I'll never understand what it's like to have to share these memories with multiple groups of people though, let alone posting it online. I think you're incredibly brave and I hope it's not offensive to say that I find your conditioning incredibly fascinating. I'm sure it's extremely hard for you to deal with, but it blows my mind, but the brain is able to fragment and create such an amazing and damaging coping mechanism. It reminds me how fascinating the brain is and how even if we do hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of years of work, we'll probably never fully understand it. Thank you for the information you post. You're incredibly brave and I wish you the best.
Literally had to deal with seeing people use an echo chamber talking about how it's "impossible" for someone to have over hundreds of alters. Made me furious and hurt, but seeing this is a balm to that wound. Thank you for making his. -Addi of Pearl Cradle
Thank you for sharing! As a system with several subsystems of both types due to extreme organized and ritual abuse, I think you did a great job of explaining them! Kind of spooked me to hear that Jade guards a section of caves with deeper traumas because we have an alter named Jade who does (did) the same. She doesn’t anymore, obviously not going to explain why😂 Jade was not her first name, it was chosen around our teen years or so, but she was a secondary Gatekeeper under our primary one and she handled our “underground” cave system that has all of our most severe trauma in it before she was placed elsewhere. Very interesting to hear about your structure! -Many but One (Edit: the having to guess with tiny little clues is such a mood and sucks so much😭 DID is the ultimate conspiracy theory of your own life. Feels like that conspiracy board meme with the red strings everywhere)
Dissociatiative disorders are objectively so interesting and such a vast, deep world. But subjectively it’s so sucky to live with lol. (Yes I know, it‘s to keep me alive, but beyond that it still sucks) Anyways, thanks for the video ^^ There‘s so few information about this out there…
I find your videos fascinating and very informative. I enjoy watching your videos and learning about DID. It's sad you went through so much trauma when you were little for this disease to happen, but I am glad you are able to help others learn more about it and help yourself process everything and get to a healthy and safe place.
This video is helpful. We have one subsystem we know of, and over 100 known alters. a video of polyfragmention would be good and helpful as well. Thank you for how much you've helped us over the years! - Jack
I know you guys get these comments a lot, but thank you so much for making these videos. They've really helped me come to terms with being in a system, and although I'm still very much just beginning the first few steps of this journey, your guys' videos are a great comfort to us, and have helped us so much in beginning to accept who we are. Thank you
Not only learning from your own experiences and research but being reminded that you yourself and your system are still healing and learning has been so helpful. I used to want what I thought you had: complete understanding. Now I see that may never really come in the way I had previously conceptualized, but that's okay too. So much good can still be experienced when we don't know everything. Thank you for all you've done and for continuing to share your journey to the extent you do. We have been so helped by your example and knowledge. 💜
I found out about DID trough Anthony Padilla interviev and it was (still is) very interesting and you helped me understand it a little more :) i like how you use words that are possible to understand for someone who is new to the subject, have a great day!! (Also sorry if my grammar is bad but english is not my native language)
Thank you for the new video Kya!! I would be super interested in videos about the different types of OSDD and the differences between the different types and DID. Love the channel, sending much love to all of the alters of the system
@@DissociaDIDThere’s a youtuber named Dr Elliott who’s a forensic psychiatrist in the uk, and he does a lot of discussion in his videos (mostly react videos) about PTSD and its various causes/effects/presentations (as well as bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, psychosis, all the fun stuff). He seems very genuine, very kind, very informative. You might think about reaching out for some kind of collaboration about this kind of thing? It would split the workload a bit for you, and possibly introduce you to another nice creator, and help him grow his community as well. I definitely think he’d be interested in helping explain all these kinds of things to a wider audience, education and understanding are important to him. Just an idea, but i think it’d be worth trying.
I do not have DID and i have watched you for a a long time and have enjoyed learning and watching you all grow. You have all done an amazing job. Thank you ❤ keep.up the great job hun.
We are a polyfragmented system. Diagnosed by board certified experts 3 seperate times. The explanation you give is very accurate to what we have been told. The task of identifying alters has been soooo hard cause
guardian of the system here. not sure what kind of dissociation we have, hoping to get a clinical diagnosis and a therapist after our first meeting with tas's new primary caregiver tomorrow. kya, you and the rest of the system are amazing. thank you for your hard work.
Thank you so much for posting this! As a system newly diganosed (6 months since our official diagnosis but almost 1 year of complex dissociative treatment) its so important for us to hear about the healing journey of others, especially understanding the time and constant effort that is expected. We have a few perfectionist parts that really struggle with the slow pace of the healing process because they have such high standards for success. It was also really comforting to hear that you have to put a conscious consistent effort into healing. Its tiring to keep actively choosing to heal from the trauma rather than rely on dissociation, because it is waaay easier to numb and flea than confront reality. But its been super inspiring to watch you all over the years grow and heal. And seeing someone who is further along in their healing process who is incredibly resilient gives us alot of help and strength. Thank you so much for all you all do!
I’m not someone with DID in any form, just a person severely curious about the complexities of the mind. You are the best, most educated, and well informed channel (outside of psychologists) that I’ve come to find. I look forward to your uplifting content, and am always in awe of your strength, dedication, and determination in educating the public. I’ve been watching your channel since the early days of Chloe. This entire channel and system brings me a sense of comfort around the confusion of the diagnosis.
This video made us realize we have minimum one sub system. The “main” group that has always been very separate from all the other members is most likely the Russian nesting dolls type. We always wondered why even Gatekeeper was never super aware of members outside her group, and now we know why. Thank y’all so much.
I'm part of your followers that don't have did. I came across your channel about two years ago, and from that moment, the world made a 180 degrees turn. This channel is the most educational, sensibile and inclusive. I'm going to follow you, hear you, care for you, for as long as you upload your videos. I love your content, i love the use of formal and medical language to speak about it. I love the love in the comment section. I'd like to hug all the sistem and say "you' re all doing great".
Thank you for making this video and sharing what you felt comfortable to share about subsystems, I've been very interested in learning how it could work. Human brains are certainly extremely complex (and in many ways interesting) things. I really enjoy the scientific videos as well, it helps me wrap my head around and understand better. You are very good at explaining things in a clear and simple way!
Dear DissociDID system, thank you for all the love you show on this channel and for sharing your lives with us. Whether you fuse together or remain polyfunctional, I hope you are able to see the loving community you created. I wish you a healing journey and in the end peace with what ever outcomes.
An absolute banger of a video, Kya. Super engaging, and I really appreciated the testimony about your own personal sub-system work. Was scrolling through comments and seeing some BPD video requests, so from someone who has it… yes please! 💛 Lots of love.
i loved learning about the two, potentially three, new alters. i hope that eventually there will be more communication, and maybe even one day they'll be interested in sharing more with the world about subsystems in general. your videos are always so fascinating & i appreciate how much thought and effort you put into them! i can tell how educated you are on this. thanks so much for all your content kya!!
I've been watching your videos for years, I think since early Nin, but I've made it my mission to watch most of the videos (Chloe's, Nin's, Kya and the other alters). Even tho I don't have DID I've learned a lot about it and its helped me to recognize symptoms that has led to me realized of traumas my brain have covered. It has helped me put names to situations and symptoms that I didn't understand or didn't know weren't normal. So I thank you for that. Your videos about triggers, grounding, anxiety and dissociation has shred life into my brain and life in general. It's mostly made my healing process smoother because when I finally started therapy (not too long ago) I went with a foundation that helped accelerate the process. There's still a lot I need to work on but still, just thankful for all the help. Just as I keep tabs on this channel and keep learning and researching I wanted to know (either by you or anyone in the comments) if there may be a channel about BD. I'm in the process of diagnosis for bipolar disorder, a therapist suggested it to my main therapist and now we're trying to figure out if I have it or not since its something that we weren't even contemplating. Unfortunately there's stigma around it so even researching on my own trough articles and stuff I still don't know what I'm dealing with. I just wanted to know if there's a channel similar to this but to bring awareness about bipolar disorder.
This has nothing to do with the video, but you were in my dream last night!😅 we were talking & these thoughts came to my mind: "My boundaries don't make me difficult." "I am the best at keeping myself safe. That's why I am me. Nobody else could be as good at this." "I am my own guardian & that's why I exist. I am so incredibly strong, because of this purpose." "My boundaries may seem like a weakness to other people, but it is what makes me strong." "I exist to be my own best friend & guardian, and I feel so much love for myself for the first time ever." I feel strangely powerful & happy rn😅❤ so thank you for talking with me in my dream lol
Im very new to realizing both that i have OSDD and reaching out to my other alters (i can hear more but I can't quite reach back yet) so far ive made okay contact with about 7 you are a huge inspiration to all of us. Ty! - The Solar-system (it is partly a pun yes) Edit: im still new and researching so sorry??? Idk what's really going on but I'm trying. I might have something else if there are other mental illnesses with alters please let me know i would love to learn! ❤
I've been watching you all for almost the entire time you've been here on youtube, and the ending made me cry. I don't have a support system and I'm fully disabled and I've been living in an unsafe environment and yesterday me saying something they didn't like, I've been given a month to be out. I'm worried sick about what to do with my kitty. I've spent my entire life being told that I am unwanted, a burden, unlovable, and just big cosmic mistake. So thank you for the kind words you give everyone. I am so glad to see your system doing better and just getting through each day. You are loved, and you deserve to be here.
This is an amazing video! I am only 14 but I would love to study neurology when I’m older (which includes DID). All of these videos on your channel are so educational and I appreciate all the work that you all do. I don’t know you personally but I can tell all of you have come so far with the journey of just existing. I have had pretty bad childhood trama but I can’t even imagine what all of you had to put up with. Every time I watch these videos I get a little teary eyed, but I believe you and everyone else are so so sooooo amazing. I love you all so much (even though I am a random stranger) i still don’t know any other way to put my compassion I have into words. Once again thank you for all of your effort you guys put into simply still being here ❤❤❤ (sorry if I don’t make too much sense it’s really late where I live🥲)
Man - I've/We've seen your journey and are over a year in and am so looking forward to hopefully being as far along the healing journey as you all are in 5 more years
Wow! Thank you for explaining this complex topic to me. When I went through school, there were less than 10 known DID diagnosis, so the info I received was EXTREMELY limited. Thank you!
Have you ever considered bringing Kyaandco to TH-cam too? It’s totally fine if that would be to much work, but it would be fun for those who don’t have TikTok!
I don't have DID, but these videos are still very helpful whenever I'm rooting around inside my own mind. I sometimes feel like I have to shove away bits and pieces of myself to function, and bringing it all back to the front to process is... well, a process. I've considered therapy, but finding a therapist, the right therapist, feels daunting and I keep putting it off. These videos, and talking to people I know who have their own mental hurdles, helps so much. It validates what I'm going through is real, it can be hard, some days will be worse than others, and that's all okay. We are seen.
The whole of Kyas story and the inner world would be the most incredible book or film. To see a visualisation of what the inner world looks like and the complex depths of human consciousness I'm sure would teach us so much about reality, what it is to be human and consciousness
@DissociaDID I do have one questions - I also live in the UK and the chavs are unbearable when out and about. When you venture out, how do you ensure you remain safe and sane?
As someone who doesn't have DID, your education about it is worth so, so much. I've started watching your videos years ago to get a grasp on what DID is all about, and even when I steadily learned about it since then, I still feel like I only know fractions about it. Hearing your descriptions of your inner world, the way you all interact or can't interact, and the ways you learn about your own system, is extremely helpful for me to understand how humans with DID, the people that exist in a system and DID itself works. From a personal standpoint, it's also fascinating to hear how much the brain can be capable of - the ways your mind can protect yourself, the ways it will help you to understand what is going on, and how it makes connections all on it's own. It's like it can expand inwards infinitely, and build things that don't just feel real, but ARE real in the ways that are important. I really hope that the research on DID will continue much further, cause there seems to be so, so much to learn about it still. Thank you for building this project, and sharing about your own experience, as much as all of you are comfortable with. I went from only knowing this disorder from bad media depictions to being very involved in learning as much as I can about it - on one hand because of genuine interest, on the other so I can explain to people in my social circles, who might not even know that this disorder really exist, that humans with DID and the alters living in a system are just as human as everyone else. Your education is worth so much. Thank you, again.
I would be very interested in the neuroscience of DID and trauma, if this is something you can manage! Thank you for another informative video. I hope you are well. (edited because I'm tired and I wrote family instead of video for some reason)
Hi Kya and system, I'm a singlet and can't relate too much to the DID specific things you talk about, but I've been watching your channel for a year now and you've helped me understand so much about trauma and CPTSD, etc. and I've been able to process and heal (at least to a point) because of your videos! You are so strong and brave and I'm so grateful for your existence! Please keep doing what you do! ❤
The way you explain things clearly while packing a lot of information and content into relatively short formats is amazing. I make an effort to learn about different kinds of people and the quality of your videos had me dive quite deep into learning about DID, even tho I have no particular reason to.
Hiya Kya (and system), thanks for this video and all the work you put into it!! I wanted to share a random thought/idea I had regarding Sub-systems (I only just learned that this was possible!). This thought is worded as a question but I do not need an answer for it, I couldn’t figure out a different way to word it properly. Regarding the subsystem, is it possible that system in of itself has a similar role to ‘gate keeper’? Where the subsystem decides whether certain information is needed to be known within the main system? So like maybe they collectively (or individually) decide that some of the information they hold is ready to be introduced into the main system? And that maybe Jade (as gatekeeper, which i assumed apart of that role is to sort through information and decide who needs to know what) receives that information from their ‘file’ to be introduced into the main systems ‘file’ and then Jade sorts through it etc. Again I’m sorry if this comment is out of line or anything. Please delete this comment if you don’t want it here. I just processed some of the things you have said about sub-systems, and thought that this idea of mine might help you to better understand your own experience. I hope you guys have an amazing day!!
I had a similar train of thought on this while watching the video! A subsystem being very defensive and keeping up those barriers from the main system/system that current host exists in was very reminiscent of the gatekeeper qualities.
I started watching these videos because my twin was diagnosed with DID and I wanted to understand more, and I just have to say I am incredibly thankful for your content. I am so happy you're back!
(Just wondered this while watching) Are there very specific types of alters who know about the subsystem(s) or is it just a matter of chance for interaction based on what experiences might cause the encounter?
the way that you explain the guesswork and confusion around your subsystem is very validating as I am discovering my own DID. thank you so much for sharing, I wish you healing. Your videos have helped so much.
@@DissociaDID OMG I have been watching the systems videos since the very beginning and I am so honored you saw my comment! I Thank you for being a comfort and a safe space for me for so many years 💕
The idea of a potentially infinite amount of alters is so interesting! Also your ability to so clearly explain something as complex as sub-systems is super impressive. How did you get so good at communicating your thoughts? Does it come naturally, or do you have some secret trick? Great video as always!
I've always been good at explaining complex topics and connecting things together! Chloe was even better at it than I am I think. It's partly why we did well in our exams haha.
it really is astounding how much we can learn about ourselves over time!! i really enjoyed hearing you reflect on how much progress you all have made made since initial diagnosis. i'm a singlet, but i also started therapy & therapeutic healthcare in 2018, and it truly floors me how much i've learned about myself and managing my symptoms over time. progress is so, so rewarding, & i'm proud of how far you all have come on your healing journey!
It really is complicated, we're a system and it's tough. We know there's alot of us but due to being in an unsafe environment we're like, covert in a weird way? Like we know we have DID but also forget alot and also can't really tell who's fronting alot of the time, we can't remember our names what we look like or anything. Does anyone else get that...? I think we're like that right now because being overt isn't an option or safe in our family right now.
DID is a covert disorder and it is a very normal experience love. Once you are in a safer environment you might find it easier to differentiate between alters, process things and remember names❤
I was wondering if keeping a private journal (maybe password/code locked) online might help sort out things if you want just a bit of clarity at the moment? I suspect someone I know to also have DID/OSDD with the information they’ve told me, but similarly, they are not in an environment that’s safe/welcoming to explore/get answers. I think they would benefit from being able to process some thoughts/emotions even if it’s just surface level stuff, hence the journal/something similar (private and locked away from others ofc).
it is so crazy what our brains are capable of. very informative video, thank you so much for continuously putting yourselves out there and informing the world!
Is there research on why an alter would get front stuck? Apologies beforehand if this is a sensitive matter, and it’s not appropriate to ask! Just surprised and curious about anything to do with trauma since any information has helped me process a lot of things.
I can give you an example: TW: SA, spiking drinks. During one SA, our drink was drugged beforehand by the abuser. It made us incredibly sick, and we believe that it also prevented or interfered with our ability to switch during the assault.
@@DissociaDID Thank you for answering, and sorry you had to go through that. It is despicable that a person would intentionally impair another to gain control over their actions/inaction. I am glad that you and your system exist here today despite everything and are healing. I appreciate every video, the information, and experiences you’ve shared with us. Your effort is heartwarming and awe-inspiring!
I really appreciate all your video cause it's helped me gain wayyy more my understanding of how it all works and how i can potentially support people i come across who have it(i know i can be diff for each person) and educate the mis info that i hear.
Thank you for this video!! Have you ever considered implementing captions into your videos? Auto-generated captions are okay, but not the best. I noticed captions at certain points in your most recent vlog video, and it helped so much
@@DissociaDID Hmm, would you happen to know I'd go about contributing captions? In the drop-down menu I thought I'd go to to do so, nothing regarding subtitles comes up
I find it incredibly fascinating that a sub-system can be created to deal with a specific type of trauma and has a separate (part of the) inner world; but it makes so much sense! ❤ Lots of love and healing to you - thanks for your vulnerability❣️
I KNOW THIS VIDEO IS FULL OF IMPORTANT AND INTERESTING INFORMATION BUT IF I DONT GET THE MAKEUP TUTORIAL SO HELP ME KYA I WILL CARBONATE ALL THE MILK CURRENTLY IN YOUR FRIDGE
LMFAO
HAHAHA OKAY OKAY, MAKEUP TUTORIAL FOR THIS ONE IS COMING I PROMISE! Next Sunday? 👀
Do it for the milk!
This made me chuckle. 😊 but yes seriously STUNNING eyeshadow
Honestly yes I was just going to say how pretty the hair and makeup is and it's actually distracting my adhd hahaha
The "layers of identity around the fragmented memory" kind of reminds me of how a tree grows around things stuck in it. You can't just pull them out without some serious work that might hurt the outside of the tree more to uncover it depending on how buried and large it is, but the fact that the tree could grow like that at all and overtake what tried to pierce it just shows its resiliency
This is spot on
as a system with 400+ alters with 5 registered subsystem, this means the absolute world to us!
I'm so glad!! ❤️
@@DissociaDID thanks again!
to me it sounds absolutely impossible to live a life with that many alters in a system. is it as bad as it seems like? or is it just as hard as living with like 10-20 altars?
im aware that it really differs from system to system and that for some people 5 might already be impossible to deal with while others might funtion realtivly well with 12. but to me the difference between 10-20 and 400 seems huge.
please let me know if you feel very umcomfortable with this question. i still need to learn what is ok to ask and what isnt. i will remove it if needed.
@@rikavanderhofstad its not purely dysfunctional, it's a bit rude to assume that. its hard but every alter is necessary to survive, my system is like my family, id choose no one over them. how hard it is depends on who you ask but its never easy, no two systems are the same
How have you been able to track how many alters you have? As a system with 9, it feels like it would be almost impossible to have a body count with that many. Do you have a chart with everyone on it or do you just store it mentally. Im not trying to be rude or anything, im just really curious
We're polyfragmented with 300+ alters and three other subsystems/layers/"cities" that we know of. We've only recently been able to bridge the gap enough to start communicating consciously with them and let them front. It's been quite a ride because they have a different set of traumas they're dealing with compared to us on the top layer.
As a singlet, it is both incredibly fascinating and deeply troubling to see just how far the mind will go to make sense of and remove itself from traumatic events. I hope that, as processing continues and especially since Omega has been coming to front much more recently, that perhaps the subsystem will become more comfortable communicating, or maybe even allow you, Kya, access in some way, if they feel as though you’re ready. If nothing else, hopefully Sally can forge a stronger connection, since there’s already more between them and her than most of if not all of the alters in the main system. I also hope that these types of comments, which I make pretty frequently, aren’t upsetting. I could see how it could be interpreted as me pushing you all towards fusion or trying to rush your integration, but that couldn’t be further from what I want. All I want is to see you guys be able to reach a stable, comfortable, and hopefully mostly happy existence, whatever that means for your system, and I’ll be here for as long as that takes, and I’ll continue to watch afterwards to see what you guys are capable of when you don’t have to focus on trauma processing. Lots of love, all, and don’t forget to drink your water💜
this was such a sweet comment 😢❤
As a person who's been here since Chloe was host, it is so crazy realizing how much your guys' recovery and new experiences impact the system. I remember Chloe being in the dark about a lot more and Kya seems to have learned a lot from the past few years they went through. I just wanted to thank you from the bottom of my heart that you are still here and on TH-cam, educating people about something that not a lot of people know enough about. It has helped me personally and I always try to educate people a little whenever the topic comes up!
I have also been here since Chloe was host and I'm on the same page! I see so much growth and I've learned so much. I try to spread the knowledge whenever I can. :)
Admittedly I have been pretty slack at keeping caught up with this network. I also remember Chloe as the host and when there were about
I should correct myself. I mean alters, not personalities. My bad
I also said networks instead of systems sorry.
@@sophialavreniouk6110
There is no one true personality, so no, Chloe wasn't the 'original' host. The *name* Chloe may be the body's birth name, but I'm unsure of that.
If a person has DID, experiencing new or different trauma can cause them to fragment, meaning new alters to split off and come into being. Afaik, this happened for the Dissociadid system around 2020. The opposite of that process is called integration, which is when the amnesia barriers between two alters degrade and they eventually turn into one.
There are some videos on their channel detailing two instances of integration, or fusion, of alters that happened in order to create Kya.
First, Chloe and Nina fused into Nin. Then, a while later (for a more exact timeline, see their videos), Nin and Kyle integrated over many months to become Kya. Kya remembers being both of them, and has memories each one had, but while combining aspects of each one they've become their own person.
So, technically Chloe is still there, and so are Nina, Nin and Kyle, as parts of Kya - but there is also Kya themself, more than the sum of their parts.
Hope that helps!
I'm proud of you, both saying this to Kya and the system as a whole. You've come incredibly far, good job. I know you have the strength in you to keep going
Thank you ❤️❤️
Super curious how brain scans look/what they tell for people with trauma
We're going to go over some of that in our structural dissociation video ❤️
@@DissociaDID Yes! Thank you for every video ❤ Please also make sure to rest and not push yourself too much! Glad to see the progression you’ve made and are making. I strive to do the same when I can 😊
A very active amygdala is one change you'll see! The amygdala is, simply put, involved in assessing threats, and emotional memories.
You'll also commonly see a hypoactive hippocampus, which is involved in storing long-term memory. A damaged hippocampus will also commonly release excess cortisol (stress hormone).
@@jessthoma2803 oh yeah! Now I remember watching something about that. I wonder if there’s a discernible difference for that between ADHD/neurodivergent brains (I sort of recall something about how these tend to have overactive amygdala/it’s triggered often) vs brains experiencing long lasting trauma vs if they are both.
Do you know why the hippocampus would be less active during these times? I figured that it would store the memories since the brain seems to prioritize negative experiences to better prepare for survival in future instances.
@@bubbiccino Just from my limited research, it looks like high cortisol levels actually damage the hippocampus over time, making it visibly smaller than those without PTSD/trauma disorders. So it sounds like the misremembering and amnesia is more-so a side effect of high cortisol levels from the trauma itself? And then that becomes a defense mechanism in those with DID etc?
Guessing, not a professional ✋
I love the tiny moments where you can really see or hear the bits of Kyle and Nin and Chloe and Nina still present in your fabulous host! Thank you so much Kya and all of the system, your videos always put a smile on my face as you find brightness even in your darkest hours ❤
Thank you so much ❤️❤️
I agree. It's a little reminder that they are still here too. 🥰
Its incredible how the human brain is able to fragment into so many parts and manage to keep up with all of them on a subconscious level. It really is a testament to you dont know how strong you really are til you prove it to yourself and youve definitely proven you are very strong, and even through the chaos, you know what youre doing.
The care and dedication you put into your videos is so evident, thank you for all you do to share your knowledge and understanding !
Thank you so much! ❤️❤️
Heya, we're in the process of being diagnosed with DID, and your videos have really helped alot of us out in this rather rough time. So thank you so much 💜💜💜
Sending you love and support ❤
^^^
I'm so glad, and congratulations on starting your journey! ❤️ Sending support!
same here (p-did)
Thank you, your videos have been very important for our system (we used to call ourselves the spiritual system) I was diagnosed in 2019 and got kicked out and was homeless for 6 months, that experience made our system go into a hiding state, and it's been almost 4 years since we even been able to think about everything that happened during that time without being triggered.
I'm so sorry that happened to you 💔
@@DissociaDID we came up on top fortunately, even though I've had to slowly build myself to even be able to watch things like your videos again without going into a trigger episode. Chloe (host at the time) helped me through a lot of discovery on my personal journey and reach out for help for my diagnosis back then. In part I'll always be eternally thankful for
I loved that old video from Chloe back in the day where she tried to make your inner world mansion as she understood it in the Sims. Inner world stuff is so fascinating to me. We're all so grateful that you and your system share what you do.
Ive been watching this channel for over a year now and it has helped me through hard times and processing a traumatic event. I don't think I would have been able to get through my gsces without the help from this channel. Thank you to the whole system for encouraging me and helping me put myself first.
I'm so glad and congrats for getting through your exams!! Sending so much love & support ❤️
@DissociaDID this channel has also inspired me to take the A levels I wanted to take and hopefully get a job related to psychology in the future 💜
@@emymania777 what a levels will you be taking? i start mine in september too
@@theobmbmbm hopefully psychology, sociology and criminology!
I don’t have DID but one of my friends has it and ive been watching you for awhile just to understand the disorder. The more I learn the more sad it is and realizing the horrible trauma that happened to each of the systems that exists. I have my own ptsd and bipolar but nothing to this level. Thank you for educating me.
All trauma is valid trauma. No matter what. You are loved, seen, and of course heard. Much love. -Lydia
As a singlet, I want to take the time and say I appreciate and honor the vulnerability you have been putting in your most recent videos. I can't imagine how hard it is sometimes to press the "submit" button. I appreciate, see and hear the work you have done.
I love this comment. Don't know why, just the last part was reassuring somehow and we have not heard that comment on here before -A lot in the front rn
@@eversystemm Thank you. It is a very genuine statement. I would hope people who know me would see how much work I've put into my own therapy and appreciate that. We don't ask for appreciation, but hearing it means they see the work done.
@@KateandBree Of course. We see you and hear you. Much love 💙 -Ben & co
as a polyfrag system with almost 300 alters, this video means a lot !! we have 6+ subsystems it's so hard to keep track !! thanks so much
Hope we did the explanation justice! ❤️
@@DissociaDID nearly !! polyfragmentation isn't just based on alter count- it's based on the complexity of the dissociation, internal structure and more !!
- little ex host
@@moondropcollectivewe plan to do a full video explaining this in detail! Was a a bit too much for one video so we had to simplify it - we cut this down from about 40 minutes raw. Thank you for clarifying though we will make sure to stress this in the video we make!! ❤
Just wanted to show some support and hope this helps in a little way to help provide things you and your babies (Serafina, Mango, Guinea pigs) need. Thank you as always for helping to educate people. I look forward to your videos every week! Hope you are safe and well and always stay true to you. Much love & support always! 💕
Thank you so so much lovely!! We hope you're doing well, sending support & care! ❤️❤️❤️
Doing better each day! Hope you are doing well!
Ive found out im a osdd system from watching your content and i cant be more grateful. Your videos have gone from interesting to actually helpful in day to day life over the years. Ive have been making huge progress in healing and recently have finally gotten to a point that I dont feel like im faking it 100% of the time. Thank you for everything❤❤❤
So proud of you ❤️❤️
i don't remember how i stumbled upon your channel in the first place, but i'm quite glad that i did. your videos are so fascinating and very interesting (coming from a psychology nerd). it always amazes me how the brain works to survive. what the lengths the brain will go to to survive and deal with the world around it
Ah, fellow psychology nerd; Howdy 👋🏻 -J
The Rubik's cube memory analogy is so clever and makes so much sense to us!!
I'm glad it helped!
Hey, I just wanted to take a moment to thank you and everyone who's sharing their experience. It's not easy to do so in a place where a bunch of strangers can and sometimes will attempt to invalidate your experience.
So thanks to you and everyone in the comments for educating people like me, sharing your experiences and awsering (sometimes stupid) questions. It's greatly appreciated.
💙💙 So much love back at you for being here -Lot of us here
there's something about learning littles can also be persecutors, that absolutely breaks my heart. that poor baby :(
thank you for sharing what you've learned of your subsystem, kya! the brain is so endlessly complex and resourceful in how it protects us. 💜
I really wonder how they go about counting 4000 alters. Did some members of the system count them? Do they just inherently know somehow? Did psychologists find a way to count them? Did they just compile numbers and names and built up a list of 4000? That would be an insanely huge endeavour. Wow.
HC-DID systems are the ones with high numbers of alters, HC-DID systems are programmed from RAMCOA (ritual abuse mind control and organized abuse) and oftentimes there's an alter programmed that compiles information about the system for the programmer to use to keep tabs on it etc. a lot of HC-DID systems have like,, an "archive" alter that knows the number of alters present.
It depends on the system! In most cases, it’s typically because someone’ll document every alter they come across upon building communication. It is typically pretty hard to do and manage whenever your system is large like that. So, that combined with estimation, can give you that number.
@@zvizviz Oh, interesting. Makes sense.
honestly i can see how that’s possible with technology nowadays! definitely time consuming, but i see lots of systems use discord/messaging apps/notes, which could theoretically keep track of alters infinitely!
@@ryguy56 It would. But four thousand is a pretty big server. And keeping track of littles or any other alter that might not want or be able to leave messages has got to be quite a puzzle. Props to them! 😅
I don't have DiD but I suffer with Adhd and derealization, and you guys literally described the white bright wall that I used to see when I was kid to "crossed it" when I was feeling stressed/sad.
I'm considering going back to therapy to find a reason for that thanks to you guys! I hope you all can help more people with this channel.
Btw you guys know acrylic and aether system right? I immediately thought about them.
Lots of love and hope to everyone in the system!💕
I love you guys. Even though I don’t have DID or know anyone that does, I always find the information you give very insightful. Thank you for doing what you are doing I know you are helping so many people! ❤
Thank you so so much! ❤️❤️❤️
@@DissociaDID never stop doing what you are doing, you all make me so happy :D
we have a pretty far-separated group of alters (whether or not they’d be considered a subsystem is up for debate) and while we aren’t in a space to really reach out and deal with those trauma memories, i’ll make sure i leave a note for us to check this video out again when we’re ready for that!
tysm as always for the work you’re doing, it’s so helpful for us and so many other system 💖 -nikolai
Oh my gosh! I asked you on live to make a video about this and you really did! I'm so excited to learn! Thank you!
We heard you! ❤️
@@DissociaDID I just finished watching and wow, that is a lot of information. Thank you for sharing what you know. I find it very helpful you explain as much as you're comfortable with. I'm sure a million people have told you this (You have that many subscribers, after all) but your videos have been a hude inspiration and way to feel less alone in my own healing. Especially when you speak about living with the memory gaps. Compared to you I am quite the old lady, but I have learned so much about being kinder to myself in dealing with my trauma through you. You make me want to keep learning and working on my own health because you have managed to over come so much. Thank you existing, as difficult as it has been, and thank you for still having the courage to make videos.
We remember seeing that, hey! 👋🏻 -J
Hey! I recently (kind of sort of) became aware of a bunch of littles and teens who, thanks to your video, seem to be their own subsystem. I didn’t know subsystems could be different to the ‘nesting doll’ type you explained. Thank you for helping me to figure that out, I was so confused for a hot minute there and now I have a direction to move in. Thank you again, please keep making videos they are so incredibly helpful 💕💕 -JJ
(also would love a video on your inner world/inner worlds in general- that’s the most confusing part for me as host about our system)
As you’re talking about your DID, I thought of a filing cabinet. Like the body is a filing cabinet and each for the systems and subsystems are the drawers and the files in the drawers are the alters.
Thats a good way to look at it honestly!
@@DissociaDID at first I was also thinking like a Venn diagram but as you kept explaining it, I thought of a filing cabinet 🤣
I'm a single entity in this body, but this video has reminded me about my own healing and trauma responses. A few years ago, I thought I was doing well (and I am), but I'm only just realising the depth of how far it goes. I'm only now starting to get into the how's and whys of my feelings and reactions. (On a possitive note, I'm finally starting to remember Before memories from when I was little :D )
Our minds are truly something extraordinary, aren't they? It's mind-boggling to think about the complexity and sheer beauty of our brains. They're like these magical labyrinths, safeguarding our thoughts and emotions until our very last moments. It's just mind-blowing, really. Our minds, resilient and unyielding, demonstrate the incredible power within us. It's like witnessing a breathtaking symphony, where our thoughts dance and intertwine, revealing the wonders of our existence.
When, in a previous video, you talked a little about sub-systems and your sub-system I imagined it as a secret door hidden behind a bookshelf in a house that leads to a completely new hidden house. I don’t know how accurate this is but I wanted to thank you for this video as it is very informative and it showcases topics that need to be heard. Thank you and I hope you have an amazing week! ❤❤❤
I love Kaya, I loved Nin and her clarity to the channel but I see a new fierceness here. To see Nin & Kyle combine in my last view was so emotional. I travelled here from my BPD diagnosis and I just want to say all the love to you for doing what you do and doing it better than I’m coping with much less. Much respect to you girl for your acceptance courage and still moving fwd with understanding and purpose
I get so sad when the video ends on the more explainer-y videos, you’re so articulate and knowledgeable and it’s very soothing to me (even when the subject is the opposite). You go through everything and leave no stone unturned, but I’d still always like to spend a little more time in your video world!
This is so much important information. As someone who does not have DID but does have CPTSD and amnesia from trauma, I can relate to forgetting about the memories and trying to piece them together. I'll never understand what it's like to have to share these memories with multiple groups of people though, let alone posting it online. I think you're incredibly brave and I hope it's not offensive to say that I find your conditioning incredibly fascinating. I'm sure it's extremely hard for you to deal with, but it blows my mind, but the brain is able to fragment and create such an amazing and damaging coping mechanism. It reminds me how fascinating the brain is and how even if we do hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of years of work, we'll probably never fully understand it.
Thank you for the information you post. You're incredibly brave and I wish you the best.
clicked the second i got the notification- absolutely love learning about did and am so grateful to get information from a reliable person/system :) x
Literally had to deal with seeing people use an echo chamber talking about how it's "impossible" for someone to have over hundreds of alters. Made me furious and hurt, but seeing this is a balm to that wound. Thank you for making his.
-Addi of Pearl Cradle
Thank you for sharing! As a system with several subsystems of both types due to extreme organized and ritual abuse, I think you did a great job of explaining them!
Kind of spooked me to hear that Jade guards a section of caves with deeper traumas because we have an alter named Jade who does (did) the same. She doesn’t anymore, obviously not going to explain why😂 Jade was not her first name, it was chosen around our teen years or so, but she was a secondary Gatekeeper under our primary one and she handled our “underground” cave system that has all of our most severe trauma in it before she was placed elsewhere. Very interesting to hear about your structure! -Many but One
(Edit: the having to guess with tiny little clues is such a mood and sucks so much😭 DID is the ultimate conspiracy theory of your own life. Feels like that conspiracy board meme with the red strings everywhere)
Dissociatiative disorders are objectively so interesting and such a vast, deep world. But subjectively it’s so sucky to live with lol. (Yes I know, it‘s to keep me alive, but beyond that it still sucks)
Anyways, thanks for the video ^^
There‘s so few information about this out there…
I find your videos fascinating and very informative. I enjoy watching your videos and learning about DID. It's sad you went through so much trauma when you were little for this disease to happen, but I am glad you are able to help others learn more about it and help yourself process everything and get to a healthy and safe place.
This video was so well done! It was educational and informative! Thank you all! Thank you Kya for choosing to share what you did!
This video is helpful. We have one subsystem we know of, and over 100 known alters. a video of polyfragmention would be good and helpful as well. Thank you for how much you've helped us over the years! - Jack
I know you guys get these comments a lot, but thank you so much for making these videos. They've really helped me come to terms with being in a system, and although I'm still very much just beginning the first few steps of this journey, your guys' videos are a great comfort to us, and have helped us so much in beginning to accept who we are. Thank you
Not only learning from your own experiences and research but being reminded that you yourself and your system are still healing and learning has been so helpful. I used to want what I thought you had: complete understanding. Now I see that may never really come in the way I had previously conceptualized, but that's okay too. So much good can still be experienced when we don't know everything. Thank you for all you've done and for continuing to share your journey to the extent you do. We have been so helped by your example and knowledge. 💜
I found out about DID trough Anthony Padilla interviev and it was (still is) very interesting and you helped me understand it a little more :) i like how you use words that are possible to understand for someone who is new to the subject, have a great day!!
(Also sorry if my grammar is bad but english is not my native language)
We hope you have a wonderful day too! ❤️
Thank you for the new video Kya!! I would be super interested in videos about the different types of OSDD and the differences between the different types and DID. Love the channel, sending much love to all of the alters of the system
Is it possible to do a CPTSD vs BPD vs OSDD vs DID video? Explaining where they overlap and where they differ
That would be a VERY long video but we can try to do a concise one?
@@DissociaDID that's true. I understand if this is something you cannot do. I still look forward to your other videos :)
This! I was thinking of/looking for this too. If there’s a video by anyone with the expertise/research on this, I would love to see it!
@@DissociaDIDuuu that would definitely be interesting
@@DissociaDIDThere’s a youtuber named Dr Elliott who’s a forensic psychiatrist in the uk, and he does a lot of discussion in his videos (mostly react videos) about PTSD and its various causes/effects/presentations (as well as bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, psychosis, all the fun stuff). He seems very genuine, very kind, very informative. You might think about reaching out for some kind of collaboration about this kind of thing? It would split the workload a bit for you, and possibly introduce you to another nice creator, and help him grow his community as well. I definitely think he’d be interested in helping explain all these kinds of things to a wider audience, education and understanding are important to him. Just an idea, but i think it’d be worth trying.
I do not have DID and i have watched you for a a long time and have enjoyed learning and watching you all grow. You have all done an amazing job. Thank you ❤ keep.up the great job hun.
Thank you so much lovely ❤️
Kya and everyone in the system, thank you for not stopping raising awareness of DID. I love you guys!
As a complex collective/system with an alter count in the thousands this video makes us feel very valid and not alone❤
Thank you for this great info! We really admire your dedication to this project!❤
Thank you so much. We're just glad it helps people! ❤️
We are a polyfragmented system. Diagnosed by board certified experts 3 seperate times. The explanation you give is very accurate to what we have been told. The task of identifying alters has been soooo hard cause
guardian of the system here. not sure what kind of dissociation we have, hoping to get a clinical diagnosis and a therapist after our first meeting with tas's new primary caregiver tomorrow. kya, you and the rest of the system are amazing. thank you for your hard work.
Thank you so much for posting this! As a system newly diganosed (6 months since our official diagnosis but almost 1 year of complex dissociative treatment) its so important for us to hear about the healing journey of others, especially understanding the time and constant effort that is expected. We have a few perfectionist parts that really struggle with the slow pace of the healing process because they have such high standards for success. It was also really comforting to hear that you have to put a conscious consistent effort into healing. Its tiring to keep actively choosing to heal from the trauma rather than rely on dissociation, because it is waaay easier to numb and flea than confront reality. But its been super inspiring to watch you all over the years grow and heal. And seeing someone who is further along in their healing process who is incredibly resilient gives us alot of help and strength. Thank you so much for all you all do!
You have such a comforting voice. Makes me feel safe. 😊 -Murdock
I'm so glad, thanks for always being here Murdock ❤️
@@DissociaDID Any time. You’ve helped us through a lot, we’ll always support you :)
I’m not someone with DID in any form, just a person severely curious about the complexities of the mind. You are the best, most educated, and well informed channel (outside of psychologists) that I’ve come to find. I look forward to your uplifting content, and am always in awe of your strength, dedication, and determination in educating the public. I’ve been watching your channel since the early days of Chloe. This entire channel and system brings me a sense of comfort around the confusion of the diagnosis.
This video made us realize we have minimum one sub system. The “main” group that has always been very separate from all the other members is most likely the Russian nesting dolls type. We always wondered why even Gatekeeper was never super aware of members outside her group, and now we know why. Thank y’all so much.
I'm part of your followers that don't have did. I came across your channel about two years ago, and from that moment, the world made a 180 degrees turn. This channel is the most educational, sensibile and inclusive. I'm going to follow you, hear you, care for you, for as long as you upload your videos. I love your content, i love the use of formal and medical language to speak about it. I love the love in the comment section. I'd like to hug all the sistem and say "you' re all doing great".
Thank you for making this video and sharing what you felt comfortable to share about subsystems, I've been very interested in learning how it could work. Human brains are certainly extremely complex (and in many ways interesting) things. I really enjoy the scientific videos as well, it helps me wrap my head around and understand better. You are very good at explaining things in a clear and simple way!
Thank you! I'm glad we can make it easier to understand! ❤️
Dear DissociDID system, thank you for all the love you show on this channel and for sharing your lives with us. Whether you fuse together or remain polyfunctional, I hope you are able to see the loving community you created. I wish you a healing journey and in the end peace with what ever outcomes.
An absolute banger of a video, Kya. Super engaging, and I really appreciated the testimony about your own personal sub-system work. Was scrolling through comments and seeing some BPD video requests, so from someone who has it… yes please! 💛 Lots of love.
Thank you! And we hear you, we'll try!
i loved learning about the two, potentially three, new alters. i hope that eventually there will be more communication, and maybe even one day they'll be interested in sharing more with the world about subsystems in general. your videos are always so fascinating & i appreciate how much thought and effort you put into them! i can tell how educated you are on this. thanks so much for all your content kya!!
You're all amazing and we appreciate y'all ❤
Thank you sm!
I've been watching your videos for years, I think since early Nin, but I've made it my mission to watch most of the videos (Chloe's, Nin's, Kya and the other alters). Even tho I don't have DID I've learned a lot about it and its helped me to recognize symptoms that has led to me realized of traumas my brain have covered. It has helped me put names to situations and symptoms that I didn't understand or didn't know weren't normal. So I thank you for that. Your videos about triggers, grounding, anxiety and dissociation has shred life into my brain and life in general. It's mostly made my healing process smoother because when I finally started therapy (not too long ago) I went with a foundation that helped accelerate the process. There's still a lot I need to work on but still, just thankful for all the help.
Just as I keep tabs on this channel and keep learning and researching I wanted to know (either by you or anyone in the comments) if there may be a channel about BD. I'm in the process of diagnosis for bipolar disorder, a therapist suggested it to my main therapist and now we're trying to figure out if I have it or not since its something that we weren't even contemplating.
Unfortunately there's stigma around it so even researching on my own trough articles and stuff I still don't know what I'm dealing with. I just wanted to know if there's a channel similar to this but to bring awareness about bipolar disorder.
I don't know of any off the top of my head, I'm sorry!
Thank you for all your work and documentation on this, hope you’re all doing well!
This has nothing to do with the video, but you were in my dream last night!😅 we were talking & these thoughts came to my mind:
"My boundaries don't make me difficult."
"I am the best at keeping myself safe. That's why I am me. Nobody else could be as good at this."
"I am my own guardian & that's why I exist.
I am so incredibly strong, because of this purpose."
"My boundaries may seem like a weakness to other people, but it is what makes me strong."
"I exist to be my own best friend & guardian, and I feel so much love for myself for the first time ever."
I feel strangely powerful & happy rn😅❤ so thank you for talking with me in my dream lol
That's so beautiful. We're proud of you! Can we share this? ❤️❤️❤️
@@DissociaDID Thank you lovelies❤️ feel free to share this if you want to!😄
Im very new to realizing both that i have OSDD and reaching out to my other alters (i can hear more but I can't quite reach back yet) so far ive made okay contact with about 7 you are a huge inspiration to all of us. Ty!
- The Solar-system (it is partly a pun yes)
Edit: im still new and researching so sorry??? Idk what's really going on but I'm trying. I might have something else if there are other mental illnesses with alters please let me know i would love to learn! ❤
I've been watching you all for almost the entire time you've been here on youtube, and the ending made me cry. I don't have a support system and I'm fully disabled and I've been living in an unsafe environment and yesterday me saying something they didn't like, I've been given a month to be out. I'm worried sick about what to do with my kitty. I've spent my entire life being told that I am unwanted, a burden, unlovable, and just big cosmic mistake. So thank you for the kind words you give everyone. I am so glad to see your system doing better and just getting through each day. You are loved, and you deserve to be here.
Your vidoes always help me feel through my emotions, thank you so much for posting!!! Also do yall plan on posting more guided breathing videos?
We have one we never posted actually!
This is an amazing video! I am only 14 but I would love to study neurology when I’m older (which includes DID). All of these videos on your channel are so educational and I appreciate all the work that you all do. I don’t know you personally but I can tell all of you have come so far with the journey of just existing. I have had pretty bad childhood trama but I can’t even imagine what all of you had to put up with. Every time I watch these videos I get a little teary eyed, but I believe you and everyone else are so so sooooo amazing. I love you all so much (even though I am a random stranger) i still don’t know any other way to put my compassion I have into words. Once again thank you for all of your effort you guys put into simply still being here ❤❤❤
(sorry if I don’t make too much sense it’s really late where I live🥲)
i love the fit and makeup! these videos are so educational and thank you for teaching!!!
Thank you for watching them!
Man - I've/We've seen your journey and are over a year in and am so looking forward to hopefully being as far along the healing journey as you all are in 5 more years
!!! this is so important to see discussed!!! thank you so much for making this video
You're very welcome! ❤️
Wow! Thank you for explaining this complex topic to me. When I went through school, there were less than 10 known DID diagnosis, so the info I received was EXTREMELY limited. Thank you!
Have you ever considered bringing Kyaandco to TH-cam too? It’s totally fine if that would be to much work, but it would be fun for those who don’t have TikTok!
I'm not sure if that would be safe, TH-cam channels feel very different to shitposting on tiktok
I don't have DID, but these videos are still very helpful whenever I'm rooting around inside my own mind. I sometimes feel like I have to shove away bits and pieces of myself to function, and bringing it all back to the front to process is... well, a process. I've considered therapy, but finding a therapist, the right therapist, feels daunting and I keep putting it off. These videos, and talking to people I know who have their own mental hurdles, helps so much. It validates what I'm going through is real, it can be hard, some days will be worse than others, and that's all okay. We are seen.
Hii.. you probably won't see you this.. but I just wanted to say that I love y'alls videos. Been watching since 2019 :)
Thank you for being with us for so long!
The whole of Kyas story and the inner world would be the most incredible book or film. To see a visualisation of what the inner world looks like and the complex depths of human consciousness I'm sure would teach us so much about reality, what it is to be human and consciousness
Your videos really help us out. Thank you. 🖤
I'm really glad to hear that ❤️❤️❤️
@DissociaDID I do have one questions - I also live in the UK and the chavs are unbearable when out and about. When you venture out, how do you ensure you remain safe and sane?
As someone who doesn't have DID, your education about it is worth so, so much. I've started watching your videos years ago to get a grasp on what DID is all about, and even when I steadily learned about it since then, I still feel like I only know fractions about it. Hearing your descriptions of your inner world, the way you all interact or can't interact, and the ways you learn about your own system, is extremely helpful for me to understand how humans with DID, the people that exist in a system and DID itself works.
From a personal standpoint, it's also fascinating to hear how much the brain can be capable of - the ways your mind can protect yourself, the ways it will help you to understand what is going on, and how it makes connections all on it's own. It's like it can expand inwards infinitely, and build things that don't just feel real, but ARE real in the ways that are important. I really hope that the research on DID will continue much further, cause there seems to be so, so much to learn about it still.
Thank you for building this project, and sharing about your own experience, as much as all of you are comfortable with. I went from only knowing this disorder from bad media depictions to being very involved in learning as much as I can about it - on one hand because of genuine interest, on the other so I can explain to people in my social circles, who might not even know that this disorder really exist, that humans with DID and the alters living in a system are just as human as everyone else. Your education is worth so much. Thank you, again.
I would be very interested in the neuroscience of DID and trauma, if this is something you can manage! Thank you for another informative video. I hope you are well. (edited because I'm tired and I wrote family instead of video for some reason)
We have some videos on this in our tackling trauma playlist and our debunking did playlist ❤️
Hi Kya and system, I'm a singlet and can't relate too much to the DID specific things you talk about, but I've been watching your channel for a year now and you've helped me understand so much about trauma and CPTSD, etc. and I've been able to process and heal (at least to a point) because of your videos! You are so strong and brave and I'm so grateful for your existence! Please keep doing what you do! ❤
Thank you for such an interesting and informative video
Wishing you peace and happiness 🤍
Wishing the same back to you lovely ❤️
@@DissociaDID thank you !!
The way you explain things clearly while packing a lot of information and content into relatively short formats is amazing.
I make an effort to learn about different kinds of people and the quality of your videos had me dive quite deep into learning about DID, even tho I have no particular reason to.
Hiya Kya (and system), thanks for this video and all the work you put into it!!
I wanted to share a random thought/idea I had regarding Sub-systems (I only just learned that this was possible!). This thought is worded as a question but I do not need an answer for it, I couldn’t figure out a different way to word it properly.
Regarding the subsystem, is it possible that system in of itself has a similar role to ‘gate keeper’? Where the subsystem decides whether certain information is needed to be known within the main system? So like maybe they collectively (or individually) decide that some of the information they hold is ready to be introduced into the main system? And that maybe Jade (as gatekeeper, which i assumed apart of that role is to sort through information and decide who needs to know what) receives that information from their ‘file’ to be introduced into the main systems ‘file’ and then Jade sorts through it etc.
Again I’m sorry if this comment is out of line or anything. Please delete this comment if you don’t want it here. I just processed some of the things you have said about sub-systems, and thought that this idea of mine might help you to better understand your own experience.
I hope you guys have an amazing day!!
Potentially!!
I had a similar train of thought on this while watching the video! A subsystem being very defensive and keeping up those barriers from the main system/system that current host exists in was very reminiscent of the gatekeeper qualities.
I started watching these videos because my twin was diagnosed with DID and I wanted to understand more, and I just have to say I am incredibly thankful for your content. I am so happy you're back!
(Just wondered this while watching) Are there very specific types of alters who know about the subsystem(s) or is it just a matter of chance for interaction based on what experiences might cause the encounter?
I'd assume the most likely to know would be gatekeepers
the way that you explain the guesswork and confusion around your subsystem is very validating as I am discovering my own DID. thank you so much for sharing, I wish you healing. Your videos have helped so much.
❤️❤️❤️
Would you be able to do a video on BPD?
We definitely can!
Yes please ❤
@@DissociaDID OMG I have been watching the systems videos since the very beginning and I am so honored you saw my comment! I Thank you for being a comfort and a safe space for me for so many years 💕
The idea of a potentially infinite amount of alters is so interesting! Also your ability to so clearly explain something as complex as sub-systems is super impressive. How did you get so good at communicating your thoughts? Does it come naturally, or do you have some secret trick?
Great video as always!
I've always been good at explaining complex topics and connecting things together! Chloe was even better at it than I am I think. It's partly why we did well in our exams haha.
it really is astounding how much we can learn about ourselves over time!! i really enjoyed hearing you reflect on how much progress you all have made made since initial diagnosis. i'm a singlet, but i also started therapy & therapeutic healthcare in 2018, and it truly floors me how much i've learned about myself and managing my symptoms over time. progress is so, so rewarding, & i'm proud of how far you all have come on your healing journey!
It really is complicated, we're a system and it's tough. We know there's alot of us but due to being in an unsafe environment we're like, covert in a weird way? Like we know we have DID but also forget alot and also can't really tell who's fronting alot of the time, we can't remember our names what we look like or anything. Does anyone else get that...? I think we're like that right now because being overt isn't an option or safe in our family right now.
DID is a covert disorder and it is a very normal experience love. Once you are in a safer environment you might find it easier to differentiate between alters, process things and remember names❤
Yes that's extremely valid!
I was wondering if keeping a private journal (maybe password/code locked) online might help sort out things if you want just a bit of clarity at the moment? I suspect someone I know to also have DID/OSDD with the information they’ve told me, but similarly, they are not in an environment that’s safe/welcoming to explore/get answers. I think they would benefit from being able to process some thoughts/emotions even if it’s just surface level stuff, hence the journal/something similar (private and locked away from others ofc).
it is so crazy what our brains are capable of. very informative video, thank you so much for continuously putting yourselves out there and informing the world!
Is there research on why an alter would get front stuck? Apologies beforehand if this is a sensitive matter, and it’s not appropriate to ask! Just surprised and curious about anything to do with trauma since any information has helped me process a lot of things.
I can give you an example: TW: SA, spiking drinks. During one SA, our drink was drugged beforehand by the abuser. It made us incredibly sick, and we believe that it also prevented or interfered with our ability to switch during the assault.
@@DissociaDID Thank you for answering, and sorry you had to go through that. It is despicable that a person would intentionally impair another to gain control over their actions/inaction. I am glad that you and your system exist here today despite everything and are healing. I appreciate every video, the information, and experiences you’ve shared with us. Your effort is heartwarming and awe-inspiring!
I really appreciate all your video cause it's helped me gain wayyy more my understanding of how it all works and how i can potentially support people i come across who have it(i know i can be diff for each person) and educate the mis info that i hear.
Thank you for this video!! Have you ever considered implementing captions into your videos? Auto-generated captions are okay, but not the best. I noticed captions at certain points in your most recent vlog video, and it helped so much
We can give it a go for sure - but I think that our captions are also open to community to add, or even translate, if anyone would like to volunteer!
@@DissociaDID Hmm, would you happen to know I'd go about contributing captions? In the drop-down menu I thought I'd go to to do so, nothing regarding subtitles comes up
I find it incredibly fascinating that a sub-system can be created to deal with a specific type of trauma and has a separate (part of the) inner world; but it makes so much sense! ❤
Lots of love and healing to you - thanks for your vulnerability❣️
oh my gosh we're EARLY