I love Dr Ramani's interviews with MedCircle, but she even admits this isn't her area of specialty and, like a lot of people in the comments have said, a lot of what she says isn't accurate with what we know about dissociation and dissociative disorers. Why isn't MedCircle seeking out someone like Dr Mike Lloyd from the CTAD Clinic who is a specialist and works to educate the public? There are experts in dissociation who could provide better info on this.
Hi I've been watching your videos, they connect with me I relate with every of your presentions, firstly I managed to spot my narcissm personality , I believe I'm corvett narcissist as you explained with one of your videos, here is the thing. This was a newly discovered personality by me. Now I've been disaccossiated to every 1, I know people don't want to be in contact with me I got that but, I don't understand why they feel I should be blocked I can't progress Bcoz everything is stoped, I saw your content and I only started to relate, I'm just trying any option, Bcoz this is not life, yes I got the message I will move away from them bt I need to start life
🌹❤️😘🌹Kyle and 🌹🌹\(ϋ)/♩🌝 Doctor Ramani 🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹❤️THANK YOU INFINITELY 😭 thank you for your time, dedication and saving my sanity 😍😅 you both 💕 have been a major [miracle sized with harps and angels with bursts of divine revelation,my human earth angels 🌹🌹, I can actively envision '-\`-art=related=to further reach the people who don't speak English AAANNDDD to reach younger ppl] Kyle and Ramani superhero duo for the healthiest version of self and every one in the world ❤️❤️🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹
Ive went 🗣️🗣️🗣️👄🧠🧠👂👐💪👍👁️👁️to different doctor 🤯💯 type things that seem to totally not at all,, Understanding wut I. Go threw with this kinda thing I go threw ... I'd really appreciate being able to communicate with DR Ramani, If there is any way that can be a possibility I would greatly appreciate it please let me know Cuz alot of the doctorz I have communicated with ,, does not understand so it gets frustrating for me
I STILL have no memory of being abused as a child,HOWEVER the scars on my head prove a diffrent story. The interesting thing about dissociative amnesia is You don’t know you’ve forgotten until you are “reminded”. The memories are there , but are walled off for protection. In my case, it wasn’t until I saw the extent of the scars on my head did I realize I had “forgotten” (that goodness) the extent of themistreatment. Psilocybin helped trigger memory recall, but only after (in retrospect) knowing I had the support of a therapist who believed me (because what “memories” were coming up felt unbelievable. Too drastic. But the scars correlate to the recalled memories, even though I still have “solid” memory of being abused.). The brain is a BEAUTIFUL thing. It protected me from what I “already knew” until I was ready to know the truth.
Your story mirrors my own. I 'forgot' (feels like that's not the right word) about my traumatizing experience, until I started remembering what it was intended for me to forget. I remembered my first love, someone who my narcissist mother decided was 'bad for' me (read: a dangerous reality-checker who might treat her scapegoat like a worthwhile human being, so he had to be eliminated)...then recalled that I had only remembered him as a platonic friend. I had to ask myself, "How could I have forgotten my first love?? My first kiss? The person I had committed my life to?? And only relegate him to being a platonic pal???" That's when i started seeing the traumatizing event become clearer. To date, I only have 'snippets' of the event; I am frightened at the thought of remembering more. It's enough, IMO, that I have recalled that it happened. I have had to work through my own doubts and disbelief; who could do that to their own child?? The answer, is lots of people and many do far worse. I remember the after-effects. Walking around like a robot, someone asking me "What HAPPENED to you??" feeling like I was observing events in my life, the bizarre phobias I developed, the weird 'memories' of some almost ghost like figure from my past, several little conversational snippets, etc. It was buried deep, but it was always there.
Yes! The human BRAIN has the ability to PROTECT ITSELF! This is just one of the most common, limbic responses to protect yourself and for BASIC SURVIVAL!
This is what I wanted to try. Nothing else helps. I’m stuck in a vicious circle of hiding the memories and reliving the emotional trauma. But psylocybin is illegal in Poland and I can’t try that.Sad.
Depersonalization is so scary because it comes up on me so randomly and I can feel myself depersonalizing so I have to snap and clap in front of myself to try to bring myself back into the present and to ground myself. Its panic inducing! And it can last for DAYS
Months even years !! It’s the worse ! But it can be healed and u can be whole again! I deal with it all the time I started feeling it last year I’m trying my best to overcome it!! I feel like I’m dealing with my body from the outside in smh very strange!! We got this !
I think it’s the worst when you know it’s coming and it feels like you just woke up. And that dissociated you is the real person. And everything feels fake. Nothing is really happening, you’re not really anywhere. The most extreme I’ve had is literally forgetting bonds I had to family. I knew who the face belonged to but couldn’t feel anything. It was like looking at things. Strangers. Objects. Not my loved ones. I was so terrified I begged for med help and took any drugs the doc gave me bc it was awful.
my only problem w this video - i actually super appreciated how in depth it went into most categories like yes give us that info babey, but depersonalization/derealization disorder is chronic in more patients than i think was expected in the decades past. i am no professional, dr. ramani is and i don't blame her for not mentioning it. i don't know if she's come across chronic cases or has read much about it- but i see a growing number of people complaining of literal years long freaking episodes as mine has been. i haven't felt fully in my body in a really long ass time my entire life revolves around feeling real and has since eighth grade
@@adadove6380 I am so sorry that you are dealing with this. Lucky for me that I experienced shorter versions of this. The way that I finally got over this of years of it was to get into therapy and talk it all out with someone who truly understood. I also had to just allow myself to feel it, label it, and go through it. I once spent a whole day at my therapist's house in an out of body experience but I felt safe there. Years later, I was in that kind of state for about a whole year and I was seeing that therapist 6 days a week. I was thoroughly wrecked but I got through it. Please find a good "fit" for you in a therapist so that you can grow through this and heal. Yes, you can. Life is amazing after that. I still get triggered on a regular basis, but I don't just live in it anymore. A trigger can take a whole day to get over though. Unfortunately some ghosts never die but I am tons better than I used to be. All of the best to you. ❤
@@adadove6380 Yep. I'm the same. It's been, I estimate like 6 or 7 years for me. Really hard to remember when I first started feeling it. Some days it is worse than others but no matter what, it's constant. Hard to remember what it's like to live without it.
My son being murdered put me in a "my feet are not touching the ground". I started reading. I read about Complex PTSD. My repressed memory of being 4 years old and raped by my step-dad. OMG, I cried for that little girl for 2 days till I could call the Incest Survivor Hotline. They gave me the Rape Crisis Center. I got help right away. It took 56 years to finally understand myself.!
@@shereeclinton8741 my condolences for your loss; I honestly don't want to even imagine how it'd feel to lose my husband. But I had recently watched a video where a wife had lost her husband in a very unexpected traumatic accident. They both were only 37 when that had happened to them & there was a statement that the wife had said regarding her loss. But what she had said instantly broke my heart for her. She had said something like "I don't know how to be an adult without him. But I am going to have to be for my children." I guess it just hit me so much deeper because I can completely understand what she meant by not knowing how t be an adult without her husband; Because they'd been together since they were in their younger years. Which is relatable since I've been with my husband since I had literally just turned 20yo & he was 25yo. I've literally grew up with him & I've only known how to be an "adult" as a pair/couple, not a single person. I wouldn't even know what to do alone. I understand that if it was to be a situation I had to deal with, then as hard as it would be, I would still have to be an adult as different & as difficult as it is to even imagine right now. Ugh 😫 I just pray for everyone who has ever been through, or is currently going through the loss of their partner. I wish you all the strength & courage to get your lives to a new comfortable place.
I've dealt with dissociation that seems to never end. On a "normal" level, I've always felt like I'm in a movie. Like I'm a character & everything is controlled by someone else. On the "high" levels triggered by stress, flashbacks, etc I feel like I'm in a trance. Zoned out on autopilot, forgetful, can't concentrate, & I lose track of time just staring off.
I definitely can relate. Like you’re more aware of moving your arm and how it looks a certain way than like living your life. I have significant chunks of time for almost 5 years I can’t account for. 6 months one time.
@@theirishsaint4324 omg the arm thing. don't get me started it;s so bizarre how when i actually snap out of it, rarely as i do my arm is like. my arm. it's like i can see it and i couldn't in a dissociative state i also feel like you just mean when arbitrary things seem more important than like you said your actual life events cus half yr brain, the thinking working parts of yr brain shut down. it's incredibly jarring lol i'm like wait a sec my entire world is crumbling around me and i didn'y know ??? lolol i feel this though op for me it's been years that i have been dealing w persistent severe dissociation. like i can't feel real by default anymore. my normal state of mind is dissociated
It was until a few days ago when I realized I was disassociating for many years, and I confused it for daydreaming or zoning out. I thought this was normal. When I heard about it on a TH-cam vid, and a girl described it like “you’re watching a movie” and “it feels like the world is not real”, I realized I was mentally separating myself from reality and I do this daily as my getaway. I’m going to schedule an appointment with a therapist, because the more I learn about the different forms of disassociation, the more I realize my mental health was worse than I thought. Though I’m surprised I’ve been able to handle it pretty well. I wonder how much more I’ll discover about myself as I go down this rabbit hole 😅
There's a famous case of a man name Pierre April (a Canadian) who seems to have had a trauma-induced dissociative fugue that lasted Avery unusually long time. He ended up hundreds of miles away from where he was from (Canada). He remembered looking around, being lost, finding a payphone to call for help,and then realizing he couldn't call for helped because he couldn't remember anyone, including himself, which caused a panic attack. A Bus driver helped him and he ultimately ended up at a homeless shelter. They only guessed at his name because it was on a library card in his pocket, but the library was not in Canada. Unusually, this state lasted for a very long time, months and months. The homeless shelter was helping him gradually piece things together ....for example, he tried guitar and realized within a day that he was able to play well enough to busk for income. He discovered he knew quite a bit of physics. He could only faintly remember, gradually, bits about his past, and it tended to be associated with painful headaches....the face and first name of a woman who had been his employer at some point, that he had a cousin Luc who did large engine repair. Sometimes he would remember small pieces of very upsetting past trauma. It took many months, and outreach to the public, to finally discover who he really was and where he had come from. His family reached out, but Pierre couldn't remember them and was worried about whether they really were his family....they sent him a package of family photos, a copy of his birth certificate, etc, he reunited with them and his memories finally began returning. He ultimately totally regained his memories and "full self"... It was an unusual case but apparently real.
Since my son was murdered 8years ago, I literally don't want to be around many people. I am not comfortable with the evil of people. I have the ability to see things in people that others don't alot of times. It is a gift, and a curse at the same time.
I definitely have experienced disassociative episodes. It seems to happen to me more often when I go into freeze mode, which is my typical response to trauma. As a small child growing up in a family with 2 narcissistic parents, I learned to shut myself down during traumatic events. I now recognize this and am working to heal from it. It takes time. There have been chunks of my life that I literally cannot recall. My kids will remind me of something that I said or did during those times, and I have absolutely no recollection.
Yeah, I have two narcissistic parents and I'm still coming out from the damage. The panic attacks, dissociative elements under high stress, and complete physical breakdown or health breakdown, been there. And yes, horrible exhaustion follows. My heart rate actually drops to dangerous levels. Thanks to Dr Ramani for all the help tho.
@@GLT2024 I'm so sorry you have and are experiencing this. Sending hugs. It is good to know that we are not alone and that we can and will recover from the damage done. ❤️
Wow- thank you for your comment. I grew up in the same environment. My kids have also reminded me of things I said or did during difficult times and I have absolutely no memory of saying or doing those things. It’s unnerving but I’ve come to the point where I completely believe them.
Within the past year, I recalled a situation of molestation when I was 5 going on 6 years old. I am now 70 years old. I am now talking to a therapist online and I'm trying to figure out what happened. I successfully forgot this event most of my life and now I'm trying to understand why I self-harmed most of my life. It never made sense to me. The only thing I recalled as a child was trying to figure out what the "white stuff" was. I realize now that I was spared those memories. I am not certain my therapist is trained well enough to address my needs but I am grateful I have someone to talk to. We really don't discuss my trauma. Thankfully, I no longer self harm. As I process this, I realize I didn't get the help I needed most of my life. While I am not confident I will get skilled therapy in the future, I realize that disassociation helped me survive.
The trauma in the body/soul never forgets. Its a major violation to our very being. I believe God is wanting to bring healing to you. Yes He could make it all disappear but His ways are not our ways. He walks us through the healing ❤️🩹 💖. Mainly acknowledging what happened, (doesn’t have to be completely clear), absolutely not your fault in any way, go through the tears if needed and then~forgiveness. That is the main thing. For you and your soul💕not them. . I went through something similar with a “forgotten” childhood memory and I too self harmed growing up. God bless you on your journey.
I have heard this is common for child abuse survivors. I am so sorry for what you went through 💔 You are so smart and brave. And i hope your therapist helps you greatly! Sending love and light to you precious human 💜✨
As a child I used to have an extremely difficult time whenever I was expected to recollect and/or narrate any small incident from the past (even from a few minutes ago). This explains a LOT. I was probably dissociated 90% of the time.
Just in my personal opinion, I would get evaluated if you are concerned about it. It could also be a different memory problem…I wouldn’t jump on this as a definite diagnosis. Best of luck!
@@HammerFamily4 They won't make a diagnosis in my city, I gotta go drive 2 1/2 hrs away to see a specialist, that will then give me the piece of paper I need, to explain my EXTREMELY odd behavior lol! knowing good and well, that I'm not gonna get a SSI check to fall back on in case i call my boss or coworker a bad word 1 day when she/he might? be in a bad mood lmao! causing me to get fired and later hungry haha, good! god, what a complete joke! Lol! the fact I have to spend $ and time to go do that to make a lil progress haha.
Kinda similar to me, but when I was a child I had really good memory. But after a certain event in life, my memory became really bad that I had difficulty remembering what I was doing moments ago. It has slightly gotten better without treatment but it comes back every now and then. Like someone in the replies said, I'm not entirely sure it's dissociation but it could be a milder version.
In 2013, the man I was married to attempted to kill me. Much of my memory leading up to the event, of the event itself, and the weeks/months following the event is non-existent. I remember only brief moments: laying on the ground and looking into a campfire, being carried to a vehicle, the ER physician probing a laceration on my head and informing someone that my skull was exposed. Due in large part to my inability to remember (much less relay to a jury) the events of the assault, he was able to plead out. He received a 36 month sentence for his attempt on my life and served about 18 months of that. When this doctor makes the statement that mental health should be driving policy, she could not be speaking a louder truth. For many of us, the criminal justice system only serves to deepen our trauma and denies us the dignity and, well, justice that we deserve!
I’m in a permanent state of depersonalisation and have been all my life. My mum told me I was born 6 weeks early and nearly died and I’m convinced that whatever medical procedures I experienced in 1961 as a new born baby is responsible for this feeling that I’m not really here or that I’m watching my life on a movie screen. In my 20s I saw a psychiatrist who told me my condition was called depersonalisation. I’ve just accepted it and got on with life as there is nothing else I can do about it. During my lifetime I’ve been involved with a couple of abusive partners and to get me through it I used to think ‘well I’m not really here anyway’ and that somehow kept me going until I got rid of those men from my life. I find that if I keep myself busy everyday that I can stop myself dwelling on it that I can push it to the back of my mind. It would be amazing not to have it but scary at the same time as I don’t know any different.
I think I know that feeling.. I don’t spend much time in this reality, either. It is scary, heavy, noisy... Everything is bright and sharp and I feel vulnerable, and even tho the world is beautiful, there are so many ugly things going on that I usually escape at some point, whether I want to or not. Idk where I go, but I’m not here. Confusing. I said in another comment here that ”I feel like a dream”. That’s as good as I can describe it. Could you try coming into this reality to spend time with things that make you feel happy and safe? Animals, humans, gardening, painting, playing outside or just walking - these are just examples - simple things☺️ I swear it’s a beautiful world, and much of it is worth experiencing! I wish you all the best💗 HUGs from Finland🖤🐺
I think you would feel so extremely disoriented if you got rid of chronic depersonalization somehow. The experience between "normal" and dissociated is vastly different. I think it would be even more distressing to go from depersonalization to normal than the other way around- everything would feel very real, everything would feel like it matters. You'd feel emotions- good and bad, inside yourself. You'd feel love and care and concern for certain people and for yourself. But you'd also feel sorrow, anger, disappointment, grief. I don't know, maybe it is still a good idea to try? So you don't miss out on any more of your life.
I pray for everyone who has this!! God delivers from demon possession. “Jesus rebuked the demon, and it came out of the boy, and he was healed at that moment.” Matthew 17:18 NIV Jesus did it for me! He will do it for you too🙏🙏🙏
@@kristiinakapinen2071 I pray for everyone who has this!! God delivers from demon possession. “Jesus rebuked the demon, and it came out of the boy, and he was healed at that moment.” Matthew 17:18 NIV Jesus did it for me! He will do it for you too🙏🙏🙏
I experienced a Dissociative Fugue and was actually considered a missing person for nearly two months. I was found wandering at a truck stop sincerely asking people, "Do you know who I am?" It was a scary experience. 😨
I had one of these. It lasted about four days then finally I “woke up”. Until then I knew that I should know my own name but I just didn’t. I had no memories at all for that period and I just wandered around trying to stay under everyone’s radar so no-one would find out.
I’ve experienced dissociative amnesia since I was 17. It may have started sooner, as my whole childhood was one 18-years-long trauma. The thing that really bothers me about it, is that I don’t know when it happens, unless someone was with me. My therapist said it was a gift from god. I’d rather my gift had been a family who loved me.
I pray for everyone who has this!! God delivers from demon possession. “Jesus rebuked the demon, and it came out of the boy, and he was healed at that moment.” Matthew 17:18 NIV Jesus did it for me! He will do it for you too🙏🙏🙏
melissadadzie59, we certainly do not have devils. The Narcissist may. I didn’t know I had lost memories until encountering a childhood friend I had no memory of. The poor fellow was hurt that I couldn’t remember him. The Lord has healed me greatly in recent years. Psalm 34: 18 The LORD is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart; and saveth such as be of a contrite spirit. KJV
I was always in a constant thought of what is wrong with me? Why do i act and feel the way I am. This video really opened my eyes and brought emotions to me. I feel so numb and i feel like im in a movie or bubble going about my day. Such a weird feeling but anyone dealing with this.. we got this!!!
There are some types of dissociation that are totally normal, one of the most common examples being driving home from work and not remembering the drive because it’s so familiar.
I suffer from chronic migraines, anxiety, panic attacks and depression I experience disassociation during especially painful periods or high stress times. When she said you operate in a robotic way that's exactly how it feels. I will often not feel like I recognize my own reflection in the mirror.
Don’t listen to what that person wrote! You can’t see alters in eyes. It sounds like you may benefit from speaking with a mental health professional. Possibly one that is trained in trauma. If I am understanding correctly you experience periods of pain. Chronic pain is traumatic and can also be the result of trauma. I experience chronic pain and everything you mention above. For me all of it, even the pain, is related to trauma. Now that I know I have trauma in my past I am able to start working through it.
Omg i will also do this. As if im on the backseat watching alter me controlling the body. I will know who i am supposed to be, but i don't allign to it. Often will talk broken English due to altered thought patterns and a reduced experienced of the world.
Bruh, one time I looked in the mirror and jumped back because I literally did not recognise myself and scared myself. For me it's a combination of trauma and a physical injury, so I'd recommend looking into that.
I am missing complete chunks of my life, mainly in childhood through teen years. It wasn't until a few years ago a counselor told me he felt my memory had been affected by anxiety. I believe he meant exactly what you guys are talking about.
I pray for everyone who has this!! God delivers from demon possession. “Jesus rebuked the demon, and it came out of the boy, and he was healed at that moment.” Matthew 17:18 NIV Jesus did it for me! He will do it for you too🙏🙏🙏
Self care during trauma triggers would make an excellent topic! So tired of hearing all the labels and symptoms but not hearing simple techniques that might help someone feel better in the moment.
I started carrying a Rosary constantly after losing my husband of 44 years, even when sleeping, even though I wasn't Catholic. It brings me so much comfort that I converted to Catholic and I still carry the Rosary constantly and now I pray it twice daily. Also listening to Gregorian chant helps me. I love Harpa Dei. 🙏💝🌼🌿
On that note, I appreciate hearing the terms and symptoms because those things are key in understanding how any disorder works, which is always going to be the first step in any sort of treatment or self-help anyway
You can find a list of simple and minimally impactful strategies on other videos. The more complex the disorder, the more important it is to use strategies that do not make you worse. Thus this therapist is trying to tell people she is not skilled enough to even diagnose, let alone treat, DID.
I’ve experienced a dissociative event that I recall really clear. It was the weirdest feeling I’ve ever experienced. I started to feel strangely different when it happened. I remember my ex partner who I believe is a narcissist based on his repeated actions aligning with the description of the personality. It was the day I left him. He went into another episode of rage that day, yelling at the top of his lungs and threatening me after what he did that day..I remember in the moment it was happening as I was looking at him, I couldn’t believe this was the person I chose to share my life with and I was trying to in the moment make myself see what I wasn’t trying to see, what I wasn’t trying to acknowledge was my reality. And right after I did that the feeling started happening. The best way I could describe it is: I still kept hearing him but I heard him different his yelling started sounding more and more distant (I was literally right in front of him at this point) so I knew it wasn’t normal and I have perfect hearing. But I sort of froze in that moment. I almost felt like I couldn’t talk. But it was important to me to feel it out so I didn’t try to stop it, it became scary when I started seeing myself from above the experience I was having in real time from literally outside my body. The way I took it after it all happened was like a sign that this person I had imagined my entire life with, he wasn’t for me. He had issues I couldn’t help him with and was actively causing me and our daughter a lot of harm. And he didn’t care. It was heartbreaking to finally see that. And I don’t know exactly just how long I was in that experience but I remember I sorta snapped out of it when I started being able to hear clearly again and by this time, he had stopped yelling for a moment. I took one look at my 3 month old daughter thought about all the things I’d have to go through raising my baby alone as a single mother and I had an idea of how’d that all look because my mom was a single mother also, then I looked back at my ex that was back yelling and all his dramatics and I told him to get the f* out of my house and never come back. I will always remember the stunned look on his face. I’ve been through a lot of things before him but when I seen I would have perpetuated the trauma onto my daughter with him, it gave me the strength I needed to start my healing journey. I wanted it to stop with me. And doing it felt like I was cutting my own arm off, it was so difficult to go through. But I made the right decision. He tried to return - I’ve never gone back. ♥️
@ Candy, thank u for sharing your Not so good relationship and the traumatizing experiences u and yur daughter suffered through. I've pretty much went through a similar relationship / marriage as yours.The part where you talked about looking at your daughter and making that important decision to tell him to leave and never come back was your spiritual and God like self taking charge of how you and your daughter wish to live out your lives happily, compared to being treated as just some uncaring man's doormat. I'm so happy you and your daughter survived this and had the sense to finally speak up and make the demon leave as I had just gone through this again with my own 23-year-old daughter the emotional and the physical abuse is the hardest and the most traumatizing of what they do in front of us it's almost as if they have two different personalities and no conscience I pray you and your daughter stay healthy happy and safe in your newfound Journey in both your future lives. Blessings, minister Diane www.thewaythetruthandthelifedivinejesus.blogspot.com
When I was a little girl, my mom had a horrible boyfriend and he did some really bad things. We went to court for what happened. I think I changed something I said. I remember the lawyers being so upset with me for saying I couldn’t remember. They said, “you forget what you ate yesterday. Maybe even what you wore the day before, but you don’t forget something traumatic happens to you.” I always thought about how I was a “liar.” Plus, I always felt guilty about getting people in trouble so I stopped talking about anything bad that happened in my life. Now even when something hurtful happens too me or I do bad things myself I can’t remember. I feels like i genuinely black out. Sometimes in moments I feel exactly how she said. I’m watching things happen to me from outside of my body with my head turned and one eye closed. Talking about this makes me feel physically sick.
I struggled with disassociation in grief a lot in the first year after I lost my best friend. Life felt like I was playing in a video game at times and like I was just looking at life from the outside. I one day couldn’t remember my middle name and thought I was losing it. My therapist told me what it was and that my mind was trying to protect me in a way. I don’t feel like that much anymore very rarely and it’s been two years. Thankful to be here still.
Since losing my wife I have felt moments where everything outside of my home didn’t feel real, like you say, almost as if it was a video game. I am due to start counselling soon though, so hopefully that is in my past.
During my episodes of dissociation, it was always like the world around me became an ephemeral shadow realm. My perception desaturated the world around me and made it seem grey, cloudy, muted, and insubstantial. Like I was the only tangible thing, and everything else was made of fog. There were times it felt like I could pass my hands through the objects around me, not because I wasn’t real, but because they weren’t. The thing is, I wasn’t hallucinating; the world was there, and if I touched it, it felt solid (if distant), and my hands didn’t pass through it. I knew it was my perception that was distorted. But knowing that didn’t really change my interpretation. Even now, I experience some level of dissociation on a regular basis. Now it feels more like I’m in a glass box or cloaked in some kind of force field that acts as a barrier between me and the rest of the world. It makes it just a little harder to stay ground, stay present, and stay connected to my life.
That is called derealization. That was the last dissosiative symptom (during depression and anxiety disorder) that went away. Earlier I had had also depersonalization and once paralysis. At one point, I used to experience derealization every time I went to supermarket. Too much stimuli. What helped me was the fact that I knew about dissosiative symptoms prior to having actual dissoasitive episodes...and I knew, that it is NORMAL response of mind for extreme emotions. Extreme boredom when driving car...you dissosiate...and 20km later you realize you have no memory of it. Extreme happiness when getting proposed/proposing...you would not remember anything of that. Being extremely scared...you might again dissosiate. Dissosiation is nothing to be scared of. It is annoying, but if you remember, what triggered your dissosiative episode, it can be extremely helpful when prosessing trauma in therapy! At least, it was very helpful for me. Sadly Ramani did not talk about normal dissosiation as it is part of spectrum and would probably help people to be less scared of their dissosiative episodes.
When I dissociate, I feel numb like after a few drinks. I am also losing some inhibition asking phone number to someone I would barely know while in general, I am really shy.
Has anyone ever had a dissociative episode where there was complete disorientation (not knowing which was was up, down, left, right, what street/area, and not remembering name or year etc)?
I pray for everyone who has this!! God delivers from demon possession. “Jesus rebuked the demon, and it came out of the boy, and he was healed at that moment.” Matthew 17:18 NIV Jesus did it for me! He will do it for you too🙏🙏🙏
Personally for me and actually felt like the world was too realistic like a hyper realistic feeling where I felt every single thought that came to mine and perceived every single thing with a third person perspective.
I spent most of my life out side myself 😢 I am 56 years old. I been fight to stay in my body. It's been 10 months since I left my body. I am excited about my healing. It's the hardest thing I have ever had to do. Thank you for your education.🙏❤️
I pray for everyone who has this!! God delivers from demon possession. “Jesus rebuked the demon, and it came out of the boy, and he was healed at that moment.” Matthew 17:18 NIV Jesus did it for me! He will do it for you too🙏🙏🙏
When I was a pre-teen and teen, I would sometimes have a fleeting feeling/thought of: Is this real? Is my life real? Like I suddenly woke up to a different reality/channel. It would go away pretty quickly, but it was a scary event. Now I recognize it as depersonalization disorder. I used to write it off as "hormones," but now I see that there was a huge environmental element.
Hello! I grew up and around that age range, I asked myself the exact same questions!! I thought it was a "super power", or something like it. It also usually occurred every Sunday morning. I don't know why? Then I would dissociate during high-emotional conflicts/confrontations. I'm hoping to try EMDR treatment soon. It's a non-invasive trauma-based therapy.
You described exactly what I experienced as a pre-teen! However, it would happen in “clusters” over and over again each minute - for maybe 5 minutes total). I can’t remember how often these episodes occurred. I’m just in shock that others have experienced similar things!
i always felt really weird abt those waking up to a different reality feelings. sometimes i'd jus literally be casually walking somewhere and my brain would switch, i started becoming convinced i might actually be in another world it was so strange of a feeling lol
I've experienced a lot of serious mental issues, physical too, but depersonalization is by far the most awful and the most difficult to ignore. It doesn't sound that bad to people that don't know the feeling, because it's literally impossible to imagine what it feels like unless you've had it. It's so strange and difficult to describe that even when I am not currently experiencing it, I can't fully imagine/remember how it actually feels, even if it was just minutes ago, which made me realize that if I can't even fully appreciate how my own disorder feels when i'm not currently in an episode, then there is no chance i'll ever be able to get someone who hasn't had it to properly grasp the feeling... It took me over a year to even be able to put it in to the right words to actually google it and look it up, like trying to describe a color only you can see. The only way to kind-of describe it is as if you are watching a video recording of your own real-time perspective, you hear your own voice as if it's coming from outside you, your vision can lag to the point of it seeming like a stop-motion series of frames. Technically nothing seems to look different, or sound different, there isn't a specific physical sensation either, yet, everything is just terribly wrong. It's an invisible nightmare that seems to have no tangible features, yet completely consumes your experience. And, just like you can never experience or remember the moment that you fall asleep, you can never really experience the moment you transition back to reality, rather you realize that it went away while you were distracted by something else shortly after it's gone. Bizarre to say the least.
Shiit, It had happened to me smoking weed, if I would knew that could happened... I also remember that I couldn't understand peoples face expressions. They seem like empty shells to me, with no emotions :|
@@eduardomoroyoqui622 i 100% have. Been there and its not fun. Drug induced disassociation is no less worse than mental health disassociation and should be taken just as seriously 💚
I am an LMHC. I work with clients with DID using Ego State Therapy, Internal Family Systems and Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing. I work in private practice. It is NOT as rare as this woman is making it sound. According to the DSM, it is up to 5 times more prevalent in the general population than Schizophrenia. In private practice, in the past 4 years, I have officially diagnosed more than a dozen clients with DID under consultation with an EMDR dissociative specialist, with whom I consult monthly. You DO need specialized training to work with these clients but sadly, more clinicians are working with DID clients and they don't realize it. Pretty much any client who is seen as "treatment resistant" or has a list of 5 or more diagnoses over the past 5+ years should be assessed for DID. The over-arching rule within DID systems is to "hide the system" often even from the person, who this woman refers to as the "host." Propagating the belief DID is rare leads to so many clients continuing to be diagnosed inaccurately, receiving ineffective treatment, resulting in hopelessness and often rejection from professionals frustrated with the lack of progress. Just like in medical medicine, if a treatment is not working, the doctors rethink the diagnosis and try another form of treatment. Sadly, in mental health, if the client does not improve, professionals blame the client for not trying hard enough or resisting treatment. Very likely, the clinician has the client misdiagnosed and thus is treating them as behavioral when in fact, they are dissociative. "Behavioral" implies they could simply change their behaviors given sufficient motivation and skills. "Dissociative" is outside the control of the individual and needs to be addressed very differently. Every dissociative part comes by their perspective, coping strategy, emotions, beliefs, honestly. They're not trying to frustrate clinicians. They simply will not shift their functioning until they are convinced it is safe to do so. #1 goal with dissociative clients is establishing safety in the now and connecting parts to this reality. So, I beg of the mental health community to get more training in dissociation. You are dealing with it whether you like it or not and not knowing what you are seeing is at very least delaying your clients' healing and potentially causing them harm.
So well said and true! Unfortunately so many professionals are under the impression its rare, that they don’t see it when its in front of them. I tried for most of my life with many professionals all to be labeled “treatment resistant “. I do so much better on my own.
Tell me about it... I never even realized there were tripwires and safeguards and warning bells all over my mind, to stop me remembering, until I was well over 30. And then I poked at my memory enough that the block in it started talking to me. And I don’t see how no one caught it. Hell - even in hospital they saw me regress to a child and also heard me speak of “the others in my head” and they never even wrote that stuff into my file. I only remembered this later, after I found the block. They just treated me for psychosis. But the “psychosis” *never. went. away.* And I’m still learning to live with it - live with a half a brain, just floating thru.. I feel like I’m a dream.
Melissa Belding-are you taking new clients? I live in New York and haven’t found a therapist to help me. My high stress levels have me dissociating (mind fog for me) more than ever and it’s hard to tolerate. Others can see it’s happening to me too
I've fallen asleep on my therapist's couch within seconds while trying to do cbt. It was so scary for me to realize how bad I actually was. I was assaulted as a child for years in the worst ways possible, and life didn't improve after that for a long, long time.
I have Complex PTSD and when remembering what happened to me, I experience dissociation. It always feels like watching a movie of another person. I know it happened to me, but I feel like it’s a different person sometimes. Especially during panic attacks, like a shell of a person inside another person. If that makes sense.
I also have a russian doll and probable cptsd thats why even if i dont remembre just trying To makes me dissasociate those memorias from me cuz i can feel it all the time just not specifically i feel alienated so gracias for putting it into words i couldnt Believe myself i was scared también its lonely
Bruh and then you feel guilty for the panic. I feel like I’m faking like it’s my fault like there’s no reason for it. I can’t breath, im shaking and crying and suddenly something snaps and im stuck out of me watching her being like why she dramatic what’s wrong with her she’s awful but I still can’t control my body.
I experience nightmares in which I wake up wondering how I am going to continue helping to lead my now younger 2 adult children away from hardship too.
My mother and maternal grandmother did something extremely traumatizing to me when I was a teen; I had no memory of it until recently (I'm 52). I believe that it would qualify as torture. Even now, I only remember 'snapshots' of seemingly unrelated moments, and am unable to tie them together. I do not want to remember any more, because my memory has provided me with enough detail of the things they were trying to force me to forget; namely, a relationship with someone they thought was 'wrong' for me. I think it's okay to proceed in life without having that full memory come to me. I'm satisfied knowing why I dissociated (felt like floating / observing my life many times), and why I developed bizarre phobias as a teen. I just don't know what value it would bring at this point to know any greater details. it really brings me into a state of utter despair when a new memory of it surfaces and I find I have to nap because it is exhausting.
Of course you are the ONLY person who can decide if seeking those memories may be beneficial. One benefit from working with a trusted therapist to retrieve those memories in a safe place is to process them so they can no longer bubble up to the surface on their terms. When you know the beast, you can more effectively avoid triggers and be less impacted by triggers when they do still occur. A good therapist (not an easy ask, I know), can help you navigate your memories and reframe them in your mind so that you have more control, instead of being controlled by them (either overtly by triggers, or unconsciously by learned behaviors.) It gives you more options. And again, if you have found a healthy balance and decide that therapy isn’t the right fit for you right now, then you are right! Therapy doesn’t always work for everyone, and it really can’t work unless the client wants to try it for themselves. You are the expert on yourself. ❤
And to add: I completely agree, we don’t need to have a perfect memory of everything that has happened in our lives! For one thing, nobody does (except something like less than 100 people in the world, who describe it as disabling!), and for another thing, our brains are amazing at keeping us sane, by callousing off the pain! It isn’t physical, but that doesn’t mean it’s not real. We just don’t understand the mechanisms yet, but I think when we do, it will be clear that slight dissociative “scar-tissue/callous” is typical!
Hey, if the memories are showing up its a good time to hop on the shadow work train. It's your inner child looking for healing and reconnection. Are you going to let yourself back in? Otherwise you might get overwhelmed if you push it all away. Glad you were able to recollect your memory. It must have been horrid especially if you are 52. Good luck.
I just educated myself. I was totally ignorant. I failed to help a family member when asked for advice and help. I just feel very guilty and confused. Dr. Ramani is very professional and impressive speaker. Thanks
Please forgive yourself. One person tried to help me but was unable. You have to have experience and training in trauma to really know how to help someone. You did what you could and your family hopefully knows that.
You didn't know better but now you do so you can do better. :) ❤ But still you are not a professional, only professionals can work properly around that. :)
Learning that dissociation is normal and everyone does it really helped me. I have dissociation more on the severe end and one thing that made it worse was trying to "get rid of" it because I felt embarrassed about it. We all do it, it can happen when you're overwhelmed or even just bored.
Very true, but when it can get u fired from a job , sued for sexual harassment, or make u a target 🎯 for a violent crime such as a sneak attack ,ambush ,assault with a deadly weapon haha, yeah I think? we've went a lil past that now haven't we ? Lmao!
@@e_i_e_i_bro are we? really talking "legal technicalities " on a video about a mental illness video? lmao! what? That's it ? nothing else to say? about this actual subject? ... haha.
I used to be absolutely terrified when I dissociated. The best way I can explain it is that it'll feel like I become incredibly aware of the idea we might be living in the matrix. That nothing around me is real and I'm not even real. I was so scared of this when it happened that I felt like I couldn't talk to anyone about it or I might fully lose my mind and get locked in that state forever. This has happened randomly ever since I was little. Last year I finally got into trauma therapy and realized I am experiencing dissociation which is actually quite normal. I was so scared to tell my therapist all this. I'm a year into trauma work with a lot left to go, but honestly I forgot the progress I made in this area. I understand my body is trying to protect me and in ways appreciate that. I can talk about it now and know I for sure won't become stuck in another dimension or whatever for doing so. It's no longer terrifying. I might still get moments of fear, but I can now calm and sooth myself. This was a nice reminder of my progress tonight. Thanks youtube.
Yess the matrix thing is spot on - i become so unsure of whether I'm real or not, and I'm desperate for human contact or proof that I exist. It is incredibly scary, I completely understand.
Right? One way I cope is by giving myself "rules" for how to behave in each "world" because whichever one I'm in at the moment is the one that feels "real" so... I try to build a life in both/all of them. I hope this helps.
I dissociate and have CPTSD. I am blessed with a wonderful trauma therapist who is helping me process my trauma whenever it comes up. She walked me through one of my biggest traumas in such a beautiful, gentle way. I was able to talk to myself at 18 years old, when I was raped, and release that trauma, which happened almost 40 years ago. Dr. Ramani is amazing. I love her channel, and how easy going she is. Thank you for sharing yourself and your knowledge with us. You have helped SO many people!! 👼 (Edited for spelling and spelled Dr.'s named wrong!!)
From "DSM 5, Many individuals with dissociative identity disorder present with a comorbid disorder. If not assessed and treated specifically for the dissociative disorder, these individuals often receive prolonged treatment for the comorbid diagnosis only, with limited overall treatment response and resultant demoralization, and disability.."
This woman is so interesting. I love watching her videos. So intelligent and I love the way she explains such complex subjects in a very informative and relatable way
DID isn't as rare as they first thought. The numbers they have are based on the overt DID, many of us have covert DID and don't even know we have it. Dissociative identity disorder statistics vary but show that the condition occurs in anywhere from 0.5% to 2% of the population. Other dissociative identity disorder facts suggest that about seven percent of the general population may have the disorder, but remain undiagnosed.
Most current studies place the prevalence of dissociative identity disorder (DID) between 0.1% to 2%, though a few give estimations as high as 3-5%. The DSM-5-TR gives the 12-month prevalence of DID in a small community of American adults as 1.5%, and lifetime prevalence in a representative sample of Turkish women as 1.1% (American Psychiatric Association, 2022). As reviewed by Kate et al. (2019), other general population estimates obtained with dissociation-specific screening or diagnostic tools have ranged from 0.8% to 1.5%, with an additional 0.2% to 8.3% for other specified dissociative disorder (OSDD), which may or may not present as similar to DID. Dissociative disorders as a whole ranged from 3.0% to 18.3%. Source did-research.org/did/basics/prevalence
also I think its so gross to question people who claim to have DID on youtube and say they're most likely faking, it's so dangerous and harmful, it's not that rare, same as gingers or even people that are intersex
I’m very suprised by that judgemental and dismissive attitude. I thought that they may give some sort of approval..By the look of videos it’s almost impossible to diagnose someone,if I’m not mistaken, I use to like her the way she articulates but after I listen many other professionals..It’s not that uncommon. Especially in America and Turkey there is numbers in increase..Not has been started another discussion about if there is any cultural base on …So i think she needs to update her statistics..
So...as rare as schizophrenia. Meaning that it is unlikely that anyone in your family has it, at work has it, or at school has it. This is indeed rare. Far more common are CPTSD and derealization or depersonalization. And thank goodness DID is rare. These folks attempt suicide far more often, can find it difficult/impossible to work and need repeated hospitalizations, and can be abused as adults.
Incorrect. DID occurs at the she rate as schizophrenia or ocd. Approx 1% of the population. Statistically that is not rare! And given its a disorder which is supposed to be hidden, you probably wouldn't even know if sometime in your life had it.
I can remember feeling like I was watching a movie of my life instead of living it, when my mom was raging and yelling when I was a child. I used to envy those who said they can't remember much of anything from their childhood because I can remember in small details almost every single horrible thing that was said and done to me and these memories find a a way to randomly pop up in my mind, causing me to freeze and feel out of body again.
I first dissociated when I was being SA’d. I was floating above myself, looking down at my body but not feeling anything. For years after that, I would dissociate whenever I felt threatened, such as when someone got angry near me (it didn’t even have to be AT me, just NEAR me). It took a lot of therapy and work, but I am able to stay present most of the time now.
@ctobolsk Schizophrenia is. Splited mind and hallucinations. You thought you were floating but in reallity you had hallucinations. And also borderline, when you believe that you are someone else than you are.
I, also have DID. Formally diagnosed and under the care of a Psychologist which specializes in DID. Decades the medical establishment diagnosed me virtually every mental disorder out there. I do not watch the Tic toc, you tube's of people "using" their alters for show. This is a very difficult "defense mechanism " mental disorder to live with. It's not just having alters, it also includes depression, PTSD, insomnia, and very intense insecurity and overwhelming feelings of not being "safe". It should not be put on display for entertainment.
i’ve been dealing with drug induced dissociation for years. i’d smoked weed for years and never had a bad reaction to it, and suddenly here i am 2 years later not feeling real and not being able to function on the day-to-day. an indescribable feeling, truly. i cant wait for it to end
For me it feels like being in a different dimension, or a parallel universe where everything around me looks the same but doesn't feel the same. I have BPD and after traumatic events, it's for the best when my head shuts down in this way. It's not a healthy way to exist long term, but it helped me get through some really hard stuff. I wouldn't have wanted to be present in my body and my mind.
I pray for everyone who has this!! God delivers from demon possession. “Jesus rebuked the demon, and it came out of the boy, and he was healed at that moment.” Matthew 17:18 NIV Jesus did it for me! He will do it for you too🙏🙏🙏
The world science community accepted the parallel universe theory back in the early 1990s. I believed in the parallel universe theory before it became an acceptance theory. I theorize that is where alters come from. Some scientists also theorize we exist in an imagination and here is where I theorize alters can be also be created by ourselves. Schizophrenias too I theorize are communicating with other schizophrenias from other parallel universes. Because science and we ourselves do not fully understand DID (PTSD too for me) it drives us crazy?
I almost cried when she mentioned being taken away during sex, my girlfriend luckily is super generous and understanding and it’s almost a sport to get me at times to pull through, we’ll be super into it and I’m like yes I got this and then out of no where freak out because I have an episode and we talk about it and it’s just so frustrating to deal with and at first, embarrassing but to have spent this much time understanding where it comes from and what it means I believe a part of healing from it definitely comes from trauma therapy and creating a layout of the reality of the past, of adding understanding to what happened and why at such a young age. To give that little kid or teenager or young adult who went through whatever it may be that sense of security that they are validated and it did happen and it’s over and it can’t happen again. That definite answer that someone can give us. I think is the healing factor
OH, HONEY!! I am so sorry. The, as I started reading your comment, I thought you were about to make light of all this/ be a bit perverted. Anyways, I'm sorry for your hurts and encouraged by your hopefulness.
The brain is such an interesting organism. My sister & I had the similar abusive experiences from early infancy with a malignant narcissist mother who abused us physically, emotionally & psychologically, and a negligent father. We both have CPTSD & we both have dissociative disorders. But we differ in how we experience this dissociation. For me, I don’t remember large chunks of my childhood. I know the abuse was constant, but as far as remembering instances themselves I only remember a handful of particular details of some events. So I experience Dissociative Amnesia. I also have experienced depersonalisation, particularly during periods of severe depression, post natal particularly, or during instances of extreme conflict. My sister is completely different. She remembers absolutely everything. On the lesser end for her is depersonalisation but on the extreme end she has experienced fugues during a time when she was extremely ill. She would lose time, she would drive places and not know how she got there. She was really very sick. So I find it really interesting & I can only think that it comes down to our different personality types & family roles during childhood & how they affected the way we experienced the trauma. I very much retreated into an internal world & shut myself away from people. I escaped into books a lot, I had imaginary friends & played imaginary games & scenarios in my head, and I spent a lot of time alone in my room. My sister was what I guess you’d call the squeaky wheel. And also pushed herself to overachieve athletically to try and win love, to the point where the abuse became part of what happened with her athletics. The way the brain adapts is so very interesting to me.
Your story is exactly mine. I was you, my sister was your sister, but instead of athletics she threw herself into academics. I did exactly all the things you mentioned you did. It was surreal reading your comment. Best wishes to you and your sister 💜
@@thewizardshu6695 oh wow. Interested to know, do you have other siblings? I have two other siblings who say they don’t believe abuse happened because they didn’t experience it the way my sister & I did. We’ve had to cut off everyone in the family & just rely on each other. It has been incredibly difficult. I, too, wish nothing but healing and love for yourself & your sister.
@@Wonderkell74 oh my gosh, this is definitely very surreal the similarities. Yes we have a brother and he wasn’t abused. I think it’s because he was the only son and he occupied the golden child role (if you haven’t seen Dr. Ramani’s video about the narcissistic family dynamic like the scapegoat and golden child etc. I recommend it) I think my mom had some internalized misogyny, because she was always harsh in her judgement towards women. No matter what he did he got a free pass. He doesn’t get it at all and he’s pretty callous. My sister and I haven’t cut them all off but we don’t speak to them as much and when we do it’s usually quick. We never visit, but the two of us are close to each other. I’m sorry to hear it’s been hard for you both but I’m glad that you both have each other and you’re not alone. I promise you’ll get through this, you’ve been through worse. Now you both get to focus on yourselves and heal. Thank you for the well wishes
@@thewizardshu6695 that’s so surreal! Both of my other siblings, a sister & the youngest in the family is a boy, they are both golden children. I wish you & your sister all the very best x
I doubt my childhood was as severe as yours, constant emotional neglect & abuse & minimal physical (mostly by elder sibs) but i too have very little memory of my childhood. I remember telling my mom this, maybe in my 20s? And she said something like “thats not good.” End of discussion… i appreciate having a name for it now. & yes i have moments of memory, mostly frozen moments vs a running scene even… i also feel i and my mom, go into personalities by rote that we cant turn off & sometimes dont remember later.
I'm diagnosed by a specialist with over twenty years experience with what she called a "mild" form of DID. My diagnosis is OSDD. If you think of DID being on a spectrum, I'm on the less severe side. I truly believe that we will see a lot more people presenting with this disorder when we realize two things: one being it's not as rare as once believed. And two being it is a spectrum disorder.
I experience disassociation on a regular basis. I explain to my wife that it’s like being in “Who Framed Roger Rabbit.” Where half the world is cartoon characters. I suffer from PTSD, Schizoaffective and Borderline Personality Disorder.
Thanks for sharing. I think I needed to hear this information. I think it's applicable to someone that I love and care about. It's challenging to know how to be there for them. I believe that nothing is impossible with GOD. Many blessings to you and yours, IN THE MIGHTY NAME OF JESUS CHRIST OF NAZARETH. AMEN.
Great movie. I don't have many problems with dissociation but with nightmares. Lately, more than dissociation I feel some kind of detachment from people and situations I don't like and it doesn't bother me at all. Short periods that give me the time to check the situation I am in and the way to get out of there smoothly.
ASD Adhd ptsd & Sztp here. I’ve been like this so many times it’s almost frightening. Sometimes I thought I was approaching how I exist in society as how an actor goes about designing a character. I’ve also spent years and years in my own world. I’ve never really know what it’s like to just go thru life like whatever with people wanting you and including you, being rewarded for your talents, doing ‘normal’ things, having lots of dates/relationships/marriage etc, I’ve got no idea what being within those societal things/capitalist things is like. Sometimes I’ve even felt like I don’t exist. I’ve noticed the individual vs the location they are in for sure makes a difference. If I’m in a city where the energy is more my kinda place, I feel more like I’m a real person who is safe.
Just want you to know that you matter and are worthy, even if it feels like you don’t exist. Hope all is well with you “And God’s peace, which is so great we cannot understand it, will keep your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:7
I had a girlfriend who had a twin sister who tragically died unexpectedly. From that moment on, my girlfriend became her twin sister in every way. Facial expressions, mannerisms, values, behavior. It destroyed our relationship.
@@pdizzle5302 It's fascinating, it left me speechless. I'm trying to imagine this happening and it's blowing my mind. It makes me stare off into space, wondering about the fundamentals of human functioning and I can't muster more than a huh... Currently...
I experienced it once when I found my mom dead unexpectedly mine lasted about a whole week where I thought she was still alive and I was having severe hallucinations of bugs bugs everywhere but I was acting ok I wasn’t freaking out but I’m told I kept talking about bugs being everywhere but also trying to call or text my mom while In the same house no matter how many times people told me she was gone I totally ignored them. Once it went away her passing hit me like a ton of bricks and still 10 months later flash backs of finding her and even the hallucinations I’ve been in such a horrible deep chronic depression. I miss my mom so much she was a single mom and I was her only child so she was all I had.
My mom knocked my tooth out when I was a 14. My whole family witnessed it. She actually believes decades later that I broke my tooth by falling or some other benign reason. The whole family is shocked that she doesn't remember the event at all.
@@tyler6320 I agree. Denial or as someone else said, gaslighting. My mother loves denting things she's done. For her, it's gaslighting. I dumped her 9 years ago.
"Most clinicians have been taught (or assume) that DID is a rare disorder with a florid, dramatic...." "DID and dissociative disorders are not rare conditions. In studies of the general population, a prevalence rate of DID of 1% to 3% of the population has been described (Johnson, Cohen, Kasen, & Brook, 2006; Murphy, 1994; Ross, 1991; ̧Sar, Akyüz, & Do ̆gan, 2007; Waller & Ross, 1997). " "The difficulties in diagnosing DID result primarily from lack of education among clinicians about dissociation, dissociative disorders, and the effects of psychological trauma, as well as from clini cian bias." --Guidelines for Treating Dissociative Identity Disorder in Adults, Third Revision, INTERNATIONAL SOCIETY FOR THE STUDY OF TRAUMA AND DISSOCIATION
I’ve been dissociating my entire life. 60 years on this earth and I don’t remember much of the early years along with most of my 16 year marriage to a malignant narcissist. How confusing to go through most of my life not understanding what was happening with my body. It didn’t help that I was not allowed to have needs or emotions growing up or in my marriage. I have a fantastic therapist now and a safe place to heal. Been working on myself for 3 years. Even quit work due to focus on myself. I had 45 years of solid chaos from infancy to adulthood. Every kind of abuse, at least 2 attempts on my life that I remember so far. Domestic, sexual, emotional, physical abuse. Emotional, medical, physical neglect. So many loved ones lost that I couldn’t grieve. Moved 34 times along with several temporary stays with relatives. I am rhankful for videos like this and Books by Pete Walker and Bessel Van Der Kolk. Bless you both for your work.
Yup ! Amnesia dissonance is terrible ! Used to have it on a regular basis .. including where I lived and could not differentiate day and night dawn dusk . Now , after 4 yrs , I still go thru it but not as often . It is scary , it is exhausting and when you do come back , it is scarier
I really recommend Janina Fisher's work and books on this, she talks about how fragmentation / DID is not so rare and is difficult to diagnose - it's a coping mechanism that you learn to hide to be able to survive in a traumatic environment.
That DID is so rare is an old trope that is no longer bandied about so much anymore. Years ago people thought it was "rare" and "highly unlikely" etc. There seems to be this need to push people into the BPD slot away from DID. DID is not sensationalized "personalities", that is just one manifestation of the underlying trauma. It is not even the most important part. Just because there are tons of videos of people supposedly with DID "switching" on camera and some of them seemingly fake, has no bearing on DID's validity. Having to even discuss those (switching on camera) videos when trying to have a serious conversation about DID is just being forced to deal with a strawman argument that you didn't ask for. Misdiagnosing someone with DID as having BPD and then trying to treat them would be re-traumatizing and highly gaslighting for the individual.
Yes. I agree with you wholeheartedly. Thank you for sharing your insight and perspective about it Marcus. I know someone with DID. I have been knowing them for many years now, but we were not in contact with each other for quite sometime. Then on last year he was conversing with me, and mentioned the other personality name. He supposedly only have one alter personality. I don't know a whole lot about the disorder, but I immediately felt as though that is what he had when he mentioned this other person. I pray that the LORD heal and deliver and keep anyone that is going through this. In the mighty name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth. AMEN. I tol felt like it was unnecessary, uncalled for, and irrelevant for him to mention the videos that people have made on here in regards to the disorder, and mentioning that it is rare. It may make people second guess their diagnosis unnecessarily, and take them down a downward spiral. We must choose to be very careful and cautious about the things that we say and do when discussing certain subject matter, in Jesus name. 💙❤️💛💜🌹💖💗💕🤗
I just posted this above: I am an LMHC. I work with clients with DID using Ego State Therapy, Internal Family Systems and Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing. I work in private practice. It is NOT as rare as this woman is making it sound. According to the DSM, it is up to 5 times more prevalent in the general population than Schizophrenia. In private practice, in the past 4 years, I have officially diagnosed more than a dozen clients with DID under consultation with an EMDR dissociative specialist, with whom I consult monthly. You DO need specialized training to work with these clients but sadly, more clinicians are working with DID clients and they don't realize it. Pretty much any client who is seen as "treatment resistant" or has a list of 5 or more diagnoses over the past 5+ years should be assessed for DID. The over-arching rule within DID systems is to "hide the system" often even from the person, who this woman refers to as the "host." Propagating the belief DID is rare leads to so many clients continuing to be diagnosed inaccurately, receiving ineffective treatment, resulting in hopelessness and often rejection from professionals frustrated with the lack of progress. Just like in medical medicine, if a treatment is not working, the doctors rethink the diagnosis and try another form of treatment. Sadly, in mental health, if the client does not improve, professionals blame the client for not trying hard enough or resisting treatment. Very likely, the clinician has the client misdiagnosed and thus is treating them as behavioral when in fact, they are dissociative. "Behavioral" implies they could simply change their behaviors given sufficient motivation and skills. "Dissociative" is outside the control of the individual and needs to be addressed very differently. Every dissociative part comes by their perspective, coping strategy, emotions, beliefs, honestly. They're not trying to frustrate clinicians. They simply will not shift their functioning until they are convinced it is safe to do so. #1 goal with dissociative clients is establishing safety in the now and connecting parts to this reality. So, I beg of the mental health community to get more training in dissociation. You are dealing with it whether you like it or not and not knowing what you are seeing is at very least delaying your clients' healing and potentially causing them harm.
Most current studies place the prevalence of dissociative identity disorder (DID) between 0.1% to 2%, though a few give estimations as high as 3-5%. The DSM-5-TR gives the 12-month prevalence of DID in a small community of American adults as 1.5%, and lifetime prevalence in a representative sample of Turkish women as 1.1% (American Psychiatric Association, 2022). As reviewed by Kate et al. (2019), other general population estimates obtained with dissociation-specific screening or diagnostic tools have ranged from 0.8% to 1.5%, with an additional 0.2% to 8.3% for other specified dissociative disorder (OSDD), which may or may not present as similar to DID. Dissociative disorders as a whole ranged from 3.0% to 18.3%. Source did-research.org/did/basics/prevalence
@@melissabelding493 Perfectly written👍 Spot on about the not feeling safe yet so there is no change. I know exactly how this feels and have been there.
My sister and I are both DID from childhood SA . She has 12 different alters and I have 3. Mine was misdiagnosed as Boarderline Personality till they started catching the slips of the alter, a mean male only came out when felt I was threatened. The other one a younger child female has only came out to my stepmother and a nurse in hospital. God Bless you all.💞🙏🌻
I was also misdiagnosed BPD and have thought for a while it may be DID because sometimes I'll be all alone, minding my business, and sense someone else "there" inside me. Plus, one time, I woke up because I heard arguing, and the moment I opened my eyes the arguing stopped. This is the first time I'm telling anyone because I'm afraid no one will believe me. One of the people was saying "I told you she couldn't handle it!" When I woke up. Has something like that ever happened with you? Maybe it was a co-incidence or maybe I have the "quiet" type.
@@cynacist1823 Yes You will have internal arguments with in your mind. For instance, When my Daughters asked to do something ,both my Now personality and Child would argue for the child in my mind... adult me no not good but child would be but it will be fun everybody is going.. that sort of thing. I found the mean one came out a lot after drinking alcohol excessively. Have been sober since 2006. Only have trouble with him a few times now. I must Gard my thoughts as he blurts out things I think but don't want to say out loud... well he does!!! I don't go to see Phyco Dr bc of miss dx. I pray Daily for help that it stays away and put to rest. I hope this can help you. God Bless Much love 😍
@@Suz3q Omg this helps so much!!! They were arguing over a re-surfaced memory, and sometimes I hear one of them giving me instructions to stay safe and ask them for advice. She only comes out when something traumatic is/ is about to happen. The most recent time was when I was almost jumped by a hate group. One was saying "she can't handle it" and the other was saying "look how far she's come!". I also believe one alter may be a child of 2-3, the age I was when molested by a babysitter. She comes out when I feel overwhelmed. None of said alters have introduced themselves but sometimes we "co-inhabit" or I'll be "conscious" whilst "watching" what the other(s) is doing. I've had that same experience of "guarding" my thoughts from the one who comes out during abuse. She's... A monster. But she's "my" monster, she only acts in self-defence but can be ruthless. She's always there, watching, and will very seldom "take control". She uses her powers for good. The few people who've met her unanimously agree she's "scary" and that I/we look like I might snap (she wouldn't). How is your relationship with your alters? For the most part all 3-4 of us get along and typically "take turns". We'll only co-inhabit when our guard is down, each individually as well as, as a whole. "Unity" I call her, when that happens.
@@cynacist1823 No I do not have any relationship with with the Mean one as he doesn't like Me or the Original Me which is around six. Same as you when abuse started on younger brother,That is when Mean one took over bc he felt I was too weak and sickly to defend my litte brother. And he hates me and wants to hurt me. So I must Gard my thoughts when I am around People. He blurt out the most embarrassing things and I won't even know Till somebody tells me later. And I am ..I didn't say that. It was only after much inner surching and looking back at what had been said that I relised what was happening. I have little memories before 12 years old as I was in defense mood which ment Mean one was forward alot. Six year old will stop me or lead me to toy sections of the stores ,I have to remind myself I have no children or grands to buy for but will still look. Knowing you have this will help you in so many ways. I am hoping more people are understand that it isn't allways like they showed in the beginning of public knowledge of this. There are so many variables to this disorder. It is miss diagnosed more then people think. I had to figure it out on my own after 25 yrs of counseling and no progress. I have done better researching and trying to help myself. God Bless you.
Omg Dr Ramani, you just have explained how is that I have such a good memory and such a bad memory at the same time!!! We could say that I have a great memory, but full of dissociation gaps because of the CPTSD. This is an important point in my healing journey I haven't found an explanation for, untill now 😯
For me dissociation can be best described as reality becoming a videogame with a First Person perspective. When playing a game, I'm sitting in my chair and I'm completely separate from the player character on screen. I can still control their actions and make them do whatever I want. I can still see everything that they see. I'm aware of their surroundings and whatever is happening to them. Yet, I am not the character in the game. The character is in the middle of a fire fight. I am in my room, laying in a soft cozy bed, watching the person on screen fight for their life. If the character gets shot, or stabbed, or punched, or falls off a cliff, I don't feel it nor do I really emotionally respond to it. I can get up and walk away from the screen at any time, leaving the character to idle regardless of what kind of situation their in, and it doesn't affect me at all.
After my house burned down and I lost 3 dogs we went to Walmart I felt dead and couldn't believe my whole life burned up .. then my dad died couple years later I was literally looking for him at the funeral bc I couldn't believe he died .. dissociation REALLY hard to explain
What do u do if you live with that person and love them and they don't know what's wrong with them.. for an example they will get really mad their whole body changes and their eyes and they say the most hated things that they normally wouldn't never say . Then the next few hours or the next day they are normal, and always they get in this obsession with everything being clean extremely clean. It's breaking my heart. And they are under a lot of stress.
I don't drive by myself much because I forget where I'm going. I used to take my children with me so they could remind me where to go. Now my husband helps me a lot!
Thank you for taking the time for this video to educate others. I would like to say that I don't know that dissociative fugue is all that rare. I experienced it and have been in treatment for experiencing dissociative fugue episodes many years ago due to trauma. Respectfully, my concern is when clinicians say something is rare they have a tendency to ignore that it exists. Because of that, dismissive professional bias in the industry, it took way too long for me to be properly diagnosed and treated in a timely manner. Until then, my personal safety was in jeopardy as I navigated trauma by myself.
At 5:30 you mentioned dissociation can feel like intense fatigue, you described what narcolepsy feels like to me. And to my friends diagnosed with narcolepsy the triggers are stress and it causes an acute extreme tiredness and fading away dissociation. I think perhaps there needs to be further research into narcolepsy being on a dissociation spectrum. Even cateplexy melting to the floor feels like dissociation and sleep paralysis where you are viewing the body and aware but can’t talk or move
Oh boi. Thanks for raising this. I am going to the neuro sleep centre and I also have some other types PTSD symptoms. Man, I hope this is not just the body giving me more neuro symptoms!
Hi, I have mdd and cptsd. I have this issue I call a sleep attack but haven't gotten far to finding out why it happens other than when I feel an intense amount of fear. But I'm not a narcoleptic. What more can you say about it?
@@alanissophia332 in the past 24 hours I have been researching brain waves and talking to chat gbt. You know alpha delta gamma etc. I discovered there is a wearable headband EEG that monitors the brain waves. I would love to wear it 24/7 for a week and see if I’m abnormal during my waking hours. I think when I’m zoned out I’m in the wrong brain waves
I’ve experienced derealization for a while. It ranges from annoying, because it reduces my cognitive functioning, to scary, because everything feels unfamiliar and wrong. I definitely feel the sort of looking through a sheet of glass feeling, or as if everything is virtual reality. I’ve also experienced forgetting who I am for a while. It feels odd or wrong for some reason to remember that I am Sylvia. Frickin weird
I experienced depersonalization for a few years after I used this drug ONCE (I had a vision lifting up to the space and looking down at this world -then everything lost what little meaning they had left). I had to ask my friend in college to please convince me that we're here and that this is the reality. It was hard to snap out of it but you get the hang of it eventually. Now, 10 years later, it's totally gone though I miss it at times lol
the fear of this exact thing happening is why i was always too afraid to try drugs even once. A lot of people have dismissed me about this and say it cant happen but reading about medical cases of it just really stuck with me at a young age. Sorry that happened to you.
I have BPD (diagnosed by my psychiatrist, spotted by another licensed psychiatrist that did a psych exam on me for WLS, years prior) and have occasional dissociative episodes. I’ve only had dissociative fugue once, that I can recall. I remember the things leading up to it, know what triggered it and remember coming back to, confused and disoriented. The triggering incident that set everything in motion was finding out I had BPD, not just PTSD, anxiety and depression, like I’d thought, and losing all sense of hope that I’d be able to be cured or “fixed”. My thinking was, at least with PTSD, anxiety and depression, I can take pills to even out the chemical imbalances in my brain. With a personality disorder, there’s an actual physical change in the brain that can’t be undone. Then, I started looking up resources about BPD online. And that was a HUGE mistake, for someone just getting a diagnosis. What I was unaware of, was most resources online are for the victims of more hurtful, aggressive and harmful BPD people (which I’m not). So, I got to see all that vitriol and hate, for something I had no control over developing, while in a highly emotional, already stressed state. The next thing I remembered was it getting dark outside, me being on the ground and someone looking at me, confused. It was like I was controlling a mech suit that was my body or something… like I was inside myself, and I was a house, looking out thru the “windows” of my eyes. The consciousness aspect of it was weird, too. I was aware enough of things around me to not run into *most* things. I accidentally bumped into someone and/or tripped over a root, it seems like, and that’s what snapped me out of it. Maybe all of that was depersonalization. I don’t know, but it was strange… I was confused about where all of the day had gone. I don’t recall exactly when I was reading about BPD, but I know it was still very much light out, at that time. It took me a second to register where I was, I was disoriented, had left my phone at home, and I just started breaking down in a public park, crying, wondering how I’d gotten there, overwhelmed by everything going on, all the “noise” in my brain. Luckily (maybe unluckily), I’d driven my car there and parked where I usually did. Forgot to take my keys out of the ignition, after turning the car off, or lock the door, so I’m glad no one noticed. If this is what dementia is like, I feel for them, because it was absolutely horrifying…
I had the exact same experience as you. Being diagnosed BPD was when I gave up hope of being "cured". And like you said, looking up personality disorders was a mistake. My fugue state was two weeks and I remember coming to in my shared room thinking "who am I? Where am I? How did I get here?" luckily I was in my room so all my assignments were there so I got my name and skimming the questions "snapped" me back to "me". When I went to my next class, my classmates asked if I'd been okay cause I had been "acting weirdly". Apparently, I had been attending classes those two weeks! And 100% if dissociating is anything like dementia, I hope the people around me love me enough to treat me as an equal, and make me feel like a queen.
I was being sexually harassed by a supervisor in my workplace and was experiencing panic attacks regularly when getting ready and driving to work and was feeling dissociated, as to having an out of body experience. Thank you for explaining this and confirming it’s a normal reaction. 🙏🏻
i've experienced dissociative fugue twice and can quite honestly say it's terrifying, and so confusing, not knowing who you are, where you are, or how you got to where you are. These happened about 8 years ago for me, and to this day, i have zero memory of those missing hours - there's just nothing there at all. Thankfully i stayed fairly local, but both times ended up in the middle of a wood! I was told at the time it is extremely rare, and although no episodes since then, it does terrify me that it will happen again. Curiously, i found out only a couple of years ago when i got hold of a copy of my medical records, that the first psychotherapist i had 10 years ago, wrote in my records that he felt i was "at serious risk of having a dissociative fugue episode", and then he fought for better support for me. Sadly here in the UK, our NHS has a serious lack of trauma understanding. i have been diagnosed with complex ptsd, and lived through over 50 years of significant trauma from multiple abusers. I have also been diagnosed with depersonalisation disorder (separate from self), and also one not mentioned here - derealisation disorder (separate from the world). Though not diagnosed, i can absolutely relate to dissociative amnesia.
I have had a few dissociative episodes in my life. Once was when I got a break-up letter from the one I was madly in love with. I remember the pain was so unbelievable deep that I dropped to my knees crying but in a quick moment, I could see myself above the ceiling watching my physical body twist in pain. While up there, I was engulfed in incredible peace and joy; the higher I went, the more joy I experienced until my physical body could no longer withstand the joy. Then I came back to my reality of pain. On another occasion, I was driving down a snowy mountain road when I realized there was a sharp curve ahead and I did not have the time to slow down safely. I knew that if I slammed the breaks, I would lose control of the car so there was no way out. I was headed into the abyss and I did not want to see so I closed my eyes. The second I did, I was overcome by an incredible feeling of peace; seconds later, I opened my eyes and I was safely on the other side of that mountain. At that time reality kicked in and I felt sheer terror thinking of what might have happened. Somehow I made it. I had a couple of other episodes like that. I didn't know this was a disorder. I always thought these were spiritual experiences. Wow!
I feel very lucky to come out of a dissociative/derealized state that i was in for a few years straight. I thought that, as a child, it would last forever but it ended on its own eventually. I feel incredibly lucky to have healed enough to experience life again.
I’ve disassociated so much that I forget everything about myself, including my name, family members, age, personality, & my appearance. It can last for months. But now I have grounding methods & I can mostly turn it on & off at will. I have Schizotypal Personality Disorder & every schizo I know disassociates
DID is incredibly complex and still very mysterious. I feel Dr. Ramani makes a lot of rigid assumptions of how it presents and how it is experienced. it is unique to every individual who has it and it needs to be understood that there are a lot of variations and gradations. and sorry--- in my opinion it is not as rare as they make it out to be. think about it: the rate of child abuse and childhood sexual abuse alone. (childhood: when a person will develop DID as a response to complex trauma). not that every victim will develop DID, but the term "rare" does a huge disservice to those trying to be taken seriously by medical and psychology professionals, and other relationships. What does "rare" mean here? the numbers i've seen for DID is 1 to 3 percent. bipolar disorder is around 1.5%. ginger haired people is about 2%. so what is rare? and if you look into it, you will see a growing association of it with autism as well. AND its very nature is to remain hidden. 96% of those with DID are covert--meaning it is not the obvious sort seen on TH-cam and in movies.
I just posted this above: I am an LMHC. I work with clients with DID using Ego State Therapy, Internal Family Systems and Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing. I work in private practice. It is NOT as rare as this woman is making it sound. According to the DSM, it is up to 5 times more prevalent in the general population than Schizophrenia. In private practice, in the past 4 years, I have officially diagnosed more than a dozen clients with DID under consultation with an EMDR dissociative specialist, with whom I consult monthly. You DO need specialized training to work with these clients but sadly, more clinicians are working with DID clients and they don't realize it. Pretty much any client who is seen as "treatment resistant" or has a list of 5 or more diagnoses over the past 5+ years should be assessed for DID. The over-arching rule within DID systems is to "hide the system" often even from the person, who this woman refers to as the "host." Propagating the belief DID is rare leads to so many clients continuing to be diagnosed inaccurately, receiving ineffective treatment, resulting in hopelessness and often rejection from professionals frustrated with the lack of progress. Just like in medical medicine, if a treatment is not working, the doctors rethink the diagnosis and try another form of treatment. Sadly, in mental health, if the client does not improve, professionals blame the client for not trying hard enough or resisting treatment. Very likely, the clinician has the client misdiagnosed and thus is treating them as behavioral when in fact, they are dissociative. "Behavioral" implies they could simply change their behaviors given sufficient motivation and skills. "Dissociative" is outside the control of the individual and needs to be addressed very differently. Every dissociative part comes by their perspective, coping strategy, emotions, beliefs, honestly. They're not trying to frustrate clinicians. They simply will not shift their functioning until they are convinced it is safe to do so. #1 goal with dissociative clients is establishing safety in the now and connecting parts to this reality. So, I beg of the mental health community to get more training in dissociation. You are dealing with it whether you like it or not and not knowing what you are seeing is at very least delaying your clients' healing and potentially causing them harm.
They should stop saying DID is rare. The medical establishment has long gaslighted people suffering from DID. It needs to stop. They are often treated as imposters, so unfair.
I feel I’ve experienced this. Narcissistic mother, father was the enabler who believed every lie she told him about me. I, was the scapegoat. Lots of sadness sorrow, trauma. Sexual abuse from boys outside the home. One other main part of my “trauma”, is the discrimination I felt from my mother. It exists within the African American community. Mother is brown, born raised in the south and I’m sure experienced it herself as she grew up. I’m sure she resents me, because I have a fair complexion & curly hair….so, I am “high yella with good hair”. Something that in times past, made one favored and accepted. I know now how she made her disdain for “us” known from my father-who I resemble. He’s shared stories of conversations they had. My entire childhood, I wondered why she married him. Learning about narcissistic mothers, I understand he was her “original” source of supply. He’s a hard worker and was by his own words, “gullible & easily manipulated”. I guess she took her chances…married him….had babies…only 1 was “light” and she decided I’d be the one she would treat like a piece of 💩. This video, like most of what Dr Ramanl has posted have allowed me to learn, grow, thrive. It wasn’t me…it was her!!!! The dissociation began when I was (I believe) in high school. There’d been sexual assaults, physical abuse by my father, mother telling him lies about me almost daily so there was always something to discipline me for. And she’d pushed her household responsibilities off onto me beginning at 8-9 years of age. I was ironing, doing dishes, and as I got older, cooking, doing laundry for family of 7. Also primary care taker for baby sister who, was killed at age 7 after being hit by a car….I was 16 at the time. I think I grieved more than my mother. It’s been rough, but I’m here. Went no contact age 19-best decision. The mild dissociation will probably be with me until I’m laid out in front of the church. As I soar and build a new social circle, I’m replacing old trauma filled memories with new ones 😌😀😊…and it’s good!! Thank you Dr Ramani for your work. It’s such a tremendous help. The validation is priceless.
I just read your post, I literally thought someone copied & pasted part of my life. This was me! My family as well. I am white though, looks like my father, but did not have care taker. Babysitters yes at night when they went out, growing up , but I was the one taking care of my siblings & household chores. I was cooking at nine. But was always told it was because I loved to cook. I did, but I also was trying to “make” my family like me. Especially my mother. You are so lucky that you realized this at such a young age. I lived an entire 50 years dedicated to supplying my family’s needs until they all no longer “needed” me, when I started to speak up. I was discarded by parents, 3 siblings & all my nieces & nephew. Now my son. It’s a trickling down effect & leaves one feeling mentally tortured. I have felt so alone & really have had no self worth. I’m trying my hardest to forgive so that I can move on. It’s the hardest thing I think I ever can do. I wish you happiness & hope you realize you are not alone in what happened to you. Evil lurks in families. God finally separated me by showing me clarity.
@@Michelle_9_27 Hello there. Find you. Find out who you are. Your authentic self and be your own good parent. It may take time but once you find Michelle you should spend time feeding her. Her heart mind soul. Any creativity should be massaged and loved because it will express who you are. Yes God separated you, so He can begin the healing process. Embrace that!! He knows who you are supposed to become, because He chose you to be His. Take care of yourself my dear. Love on Michelle the most. She’s worth it!!! Thank you for your words of validation. Painful as our experiences have been, we survived and are here. Let’s prove all those people who have been so horrible to us wrong 😊😀😁. Let’s learn, grow & thrive.
@@sharonjones7138 thank Sharon. Thank you for your validation as well. And I’m actually pretty creative. Been praying hard for God to show me His will. I need to work. I’m so lost, & literally don’t know what direction to take. He will show me.
Moderate to severe Dissociation has been my default mental state for about 25 years. I can trace it to happening from drug use, in particular methamphetamines. I used to get a severe panic attack everyday at the same time 7 pm. Many days it’s like waking up in a different mind everyday. It has slowly diminished everyday, but still exists and I still get reality shifts at any given moment. Anyone who lived this would have offed themselves along time ago. The only thing that seems to help me are conscious breathing and eating a diet high in protein. It is quite odd to catch glimpses of my old mind after so many years living this crazy nightmare. It is clear I suffered permanent damage in my brain at that point of drug use.
I call them "Blackouts". One time I was triggered by a bus-stop and "woke-up" at home two weeks later. I had been attending courses and doing assignments - based on the graded homework - and to this day have zero memory of those two weeks. I only know it was two weeks from the dates on the assignments. Wild.
Thank you for sharing this information freely for others to learn from. As an individual diagnosed with CPTSD and BPD, your lectures are so heartwarming to learn from even after a decade of various professional therapies. CBT and EMDR have both been extremely helpful.
Through a gauze (or a screen) EXACTLY describes how it is for me. Like in in my body but I'm far away from everything that's happening. Happens most often when I'm in group social settings or driving
Many years ago, I had panic attacks during which I benefitted from a person simply sitting with me. Each attack lasted only a few minutes. Ever since that period, I have not experienced attacks anymore. I will always be grateful for each person who sat with me.
hey, good video but there's one point i have to bring up- many others in the comments have already said this but i'd like to add my perspective as well. the idea that did is very rare and that those online that have it might be faking it is irresponsible misinformation to be spreading. it can lead to people being harassed online, or not getting evaluated for it when they should. not to mention that whether or not someone is "faking," they have something going on, likely as a result of trauma, and should be treated with openness and compassion. accusing people of faking can only cause harm. also, if someone is spreading misinformation about a disorder that they say they have, call them out on the misinformation rather than attacking them for making things up. did is about as common as people having red hair, and painting it as an incredibly rare thing that many might be faking is harmful.
I just found this site. Thank you for validating my life. I was diagnosed with DID. No one believed me or my Dr. I suffered many traumatic events in my life that I don't remember. I was told that I acted and assumed a different personality. Different names are dressed differently. I ended up in the hospital for months. I still have it. But it is getting better. I still can't remember so much in my life. I don't think I want to.
There are so many true crime documentaries that I’ve watched where the people described might just be going through dissociation. This changes everything.
I love this channel and both of y’all. However, I want to strongly caution against overestimating how rare DID is. It took decades of missed diagnoses before I finally got my DID diagnosis at age 47. Kyle, I do believe most all of those people on TH-cam have DID. And there are so many more. Some people estimate an incidence of as much as 1% of the population. I can say that in the four years since my diagnosis, I’ve met two to three other people who I am pretty sure have DID. And I live in the middle of rural Nowhere Land. It’s the subtle signs: they tell you something, but then appear to have no knowledge of that fact at other times. You have to explain the same basic thing over and over and over (because you’re telling different parts). Blank stares when you say “We just talked about this the other day.” It’s easy in our overworked society to blame those blank stares and inconsistent knowledge bases on something else. But the truth is much more sinister. Very young children are subjected to unspeakable trauma way too often. It doesn’t just go away. Also, I have another very practical objection to the “DID is vanishingly rare” narrative. When my college age and older personalities would come out of dormancy, and my counselor would tell them that the reason the year is 2022 is because they are part of a DID system, they would argue with him and throw that fact in his face. We were a psychology major at an Ivy League school, and so we got very superior with him a number of times as different ones woke up. “DID is so rare, it hardly ever happens! It’s not worth considering! What are you hiding?? What’s REALLY going on here????” It’s funny in retrospect. But the rarity of DID is what I now consider a dangerous narrative. In short, DID is not rare, because psychopaths are not rare. Satanists are not rare. Other organized crime is not rare. The dark underbelly of this society is much more extensive than people would like to believe.
I believe the "DID is rare" narrative is a protective denial. If DID were prevalent, it would be undeniable how cruel and even evil a species we can be. Beings wearing a cloak of civilization. Therefore, DID MUST be rare and/or discredited. Unfortunately, the covert aspects of this state of being play right into that narrative. Like she said about crimes going unpunished due to traumatic amnesia, "if you don't remember it, then it can't have happened". The medical community's attitude towards DID sufferers who are better able to slide by in the real world.
100% ppl dont understand how messed up and confusedthe world is. Most ppl dont know themselves and most people you dont actually know. Becoming more aware in psychology reallyyyy opens up your eyes to the mental illness that walks heavily among us all.
It's rare when compared to other type of potential diagnoses. I imagine that there is just a degree of caution here because treating someone with DID is very different from treating them for BPD (and dissociation stemming from that), for instance. I get that it can be kind of ignorant to be dismissive of those that claim to have it on TH-cam. However, those who post about it are using a social media tool to communicate information on the disorder to the world. As such, they carry a great deal of responsibility. If they spread misinformation, viewers without DID will get the wrong idea and it will ultimately only hurt progress when it comes to treatment and societal acceptance. Once you put up a video on something, it's up to the viewers to interpret it in anyway they see fit. Without a proper consideration of consequences, intentions, social implication, and etc, you can end up doing more harm than good. Of course, there is also the other extreme end of being too dismissive, which results in lack of diagnosis. That's why there should be a happy medium.
@@josj1912 My main point is that I have seen countless therapists, psychologists, and psychiatrists as I have moved all over this country. Inpatient, outpatient, day hospital, group therapy, individual therapy - every possible setting. And it took over twenty years of that to get a diagnosis. And that diagnosis was initially suspected by me. I took it to a counselor in 2019. She told me I was probably wrong because it is so rare. But she was the one to eventually give me the diagnosis. But again, it’s inexcusable that the level of clinical suspicion for this is almost zero. Because what follows as a result is a lack of education on how DID presents. Then DID doesn’t get spotted when it shows up. I have the utmost confidence in Dr Ramani. But I think more of us with DID need to speak up in comments like this one and say “I’m here. I’m real.” Because to say something is “very, very rare” makes people like Kyle say that all the people who make videos about this on YT can’t all have it, can they? Just to be clear, what makes Kyle a great interviewer is that he says out loud what we are all thinking. I’ve heard MANY people say that these TH-camrs can’t possibly all have DID. I’ve heard therapists say that in videos - that these people who say they have DID are just wanting likes because of the sensationalism of a switch caught on camera. And that can be true (I’m specifically thinking of Trisha Peytas). But most of the time, it’s not. There have been many trends where mental illness is part of it. Like goth and emo tend to carry a certain depressed and/or anxious persona. But the truth of the matter is that many of us actually do have major clinical depression. The fact that we have a crew of emo people we roll with does not mean we aren’t depressed. I don’t know if I’m making a clear analogy. Anyway, my main goal is to raise awareness. At present, clinicians are not in that good place of having adequate clinical suspicion while being competently trained to make a differential diagnosis. So many therapists saw extensive evidence of it in me and didn’t know what they were looking at. They got mad at me for not making more progress in therapy. They gaslighted me and said I was being willful about not growing. When really they did not have any idea they were dealing with over 100 different personalities. That’s not okay. I wanted very badly to never seek therapy again, but I was convinced to try one more time. But at this point, therapists who deal with systems like mine say most therapists do more harm than good. And they are right about that. We need to do better as a mental health system.
Dr. Ramini, have you ever heard of dissociation being linked to headaches or migraines? For a couple months all of a sudden I was getting headaches several days a week, either preceded by, occuring with or followed by dissociation. I felt totally detached like I was an observer watching myself go through my day, talking to people, but not really present in that person. I completely understand the description of looking at life through a window. Everything felt far away. If I didn't try very hard to focus on following what I was doing I would notice that I even spaced out *as the observer*, meaning I'd only have a foggy idea about what just happened or what I just said. I was a little hopeless/stagnant-feeling at work and in my life but I wasn't experiencing any traumas at the time. I suspect with me it may be neurologic in nature as it's connected with the timing of headaches, like a form of migraine aura. I wonder if that might be the case for others who experience dissociation too. I did have an experience of dissociation one time for about 2 minutes at age 16, after I had moved to a new country and felt quite disoriented and unfamiliar with my surroundings and people so you could say that was a trauma of sorts but nothing compared to abuse survivors who are usually what you would see in a person who dissociates.
I get a lot of depersonalization / derealization with migraines. The aura effects, pain, and other visual disturbances makes me feel like I'm viewing my world in the third-person.
I suffer from chronic dissociative amnesia. Sometimes I forget entire parts of my life that had nothing to do with the trauma I went through. I wanted to ask the public whether this happens to anyone else.
There's a lot of my childhood I don't remember. There's a lot I can't remember during my teen years. I usually only remember the bad.. within the last 3 years I started remembering and realizing the very worst of my experiences which put me in a very numbing and disbelief state. Sometimes I can't even remember what happened a month ago or 5 months ago.
This has happened to me 3 times at work I have bipolar 2 I wos fine it was nothing to do with trauma I had no idea lost hours didn't know till next day a boss told me I was acting strange I couldn't remember a thing
This happens to me-and things, I’ve come to realize, that do not seem to associate with the trauma might actually hit on a sensory perception that triggers the traumatic memory. I could be completely fine and then a scent or a sound might trigger me and I go into a dissociative episode and it isn’t until much later that I figure out what caused it. Our brains work hard to protect us and it’s definitely scary because sometimes, my body is remembering something my brain does not.
12:00 THANK YOU KYLE!!! so, that said: I am a properly, twice diagnosed DID system. And I can assure you: we ( I refer to myself as I or the system, so with "we" I mean people with a DID condition) are lots and loads more than you would think, because: a) nobody of us ever had A CLUE that not being alone in your head is something not normal - because of the fact that you "need" to be that young to experience trauma to develop DID it is like " has always been the way that I was talking to another person /s in my head / had balnks spaces / found something I obviously wrote but couldn't remember / found something I obviously wrote but wan't my handwriting / was greeted by persons I never saw"- it is sort of normal for us". 2.) DID is funny, because it brings amnesia with it, which means: you can walk around for years and decades not realizing what the problem is, wondering why some people are utterly upset with you although you never met them and so an. AND: DID is funny, part 2: your head will fill in the blankets- which leads me to 3.) DID is funny, because: it comes with an amnesia for the amnesia. Until you realize, that there is something really " off" it might take years and years and years and - this is my main argument: 4.) in the meantime DID does what it is supposed to do: it helps you functioning. So I met a few systems, diagnosed with DID from the same University I was diagnosed at, all of us were: successful, in a stable relationship and sort of ok-ish with " sorry, no clue what happened in the first 15 years of my life". This is why our brain split up. It slpit up to make sure that at least one part would be able to live a normal life. This is why lots of us won't get diagnosed, because: we are - on the total opposite to those extreme "switches" shown on youtube (how on earth does that work?) super subtle and won't jump into your face with switches, different accents, aso. That said, according to Michaela Huber there is asubtype of DID with very outgoing switches and extreme different alters, but most of us seem to be hyper-atapted-to-normal-live-expectations. So we won't be diagnosed randomly, too. Only when the world shatters or an alter causes huge problems. But most of us are hyper functional. That said, there are surely too many suffering in a way that they won't be able to live a normal life and being a high functionally system isn't funny, too.
Depersonalization is the big one I experience. I noticed in high stress situations where I feel a high loss of control/anonymity/free will the faster it happens and the more often I experience those stress episodes the more it happens outside of those instances as well. The less I experience those types of stressors, the less it happens. I am diagnosed with ADHD,BPD,OCD, panic and anxiety disorders and c-ptsd.
My wife suffered from anxiety and thinks constantly that my parents are against her or plotting against her or always trying to undermine her authority. The other day she thought that my dad (71yrs old with recent knee surgery) was trying to push her and my three yr old son out of the way with his walker . She says he said excuse me and wouldn’t stop and her or my son could have been hurt and she thinks he was trying to be malicious. I love her but this is getting old and she refuses to go to therapy and doesn’t even want to take ashwaganda with me thinking I’m just trying to get her to take pills to make her emotionless. I take it because it does assist with the stress she brings but I know this can’t continue forever .
Dissociative fugue can co-occur with Dissociative Identity Disorder where the alternate personality "fronts" in the brain, takes over the body and travels. DID's switch alters often at the willful domination of the alter outside any stress. Spacing out into short periods of unconsciousness is a simple dissociation. Out-of-body momentary episodes may occur with the dissociatively amnesic, it is uncommon but very real. One may recall momentary "go-look-sees" where it can be proven the person did leave the body to the brain, and saw what it is not possible for them to have seen, in another room or at a visual perspective unattainable by the person. Edit: computer forced misspelling
Can Dissociative fugue make you act like a different person? I had an episode with no history of mental illness and nothing like this has happened before or sense. For a month I was acting like a different person and going to places/doing things i had no awareness of. I didn’t go missing though and I didn’t change my name or anything like that. But it’s as if I woke up and I realized what I had done mostly because of evidence and remembering bits and pieces. Could this have been a fugue episode?
@@danni9756 hello 💚 I can only relate, that reads just like fugue --- one possibly caused by a stressor or unknown life trigger. Mention of being like a different person, still a little aware, to my lay experiences seems more like a brain-enforced relief of something by a fugue than dissociative identity disorder... yet there are normal people unknowingly having DID. If you are not receiving a professional answer, I suggest you ask this question again clearly to beautiful 💞 person I know, Melissa a cptsd and DIDer, in a comment on the most recent of her videos on "The Bag System." She is more familiar with dissociations than myself. I hope and pray you find the 💖 answers you need !
@@thexpax Thank you so much for your answer! I honestly don’t know if it would be considered a fugue because when I research fugue people go missing, forget their names etc but nothing like that happened to me. It was more like I couldn’t think about the places i was going, the people i was meeting, and I can’t place myself there. I only remember and I don’t know why i did the things that i did or went the places that i went. I was also doing risky things out of my character and that i had no knowledge of. I know it was brought on by extreme stress for over a year and as for DID I’ve never had any signs that i might have alters. I will definitely get her opinion and thank you so much.
@@danni9756 please do not mention me her and I just had a falling out after so many years I made a comment in dissociation I do not really recall but what I can were a couple of points in my right mind I would never subject her to it was all my fault
I randomly found this video and I'm so glad I did. I was admitted into a hospital for psychological issues in December.. December 6th I remember it very clearly because my birthday was the next day. I was acting insane. I saw things people that weren't there. It got so bad I called the cops on myself because I thought I was surrounded by police that weren't responding to me verbally. I was begging them to put their guns down pleading for what felt like hours in a parking lot at a Walmart. I stayed until they closed at midnight and we'll beyond. I was asked by the police the real ones, what month it was after just telling them my birthday was the next day. I was unable to remember what month it was. I genuinely had no idea. They officer said well if tomorrow is your birthday.. and your birthday is December 7th... Wouldnt it be December? I was so scared when he said that compounded with the intense hallucinations I'd just gone through. Anyway he was clearly worried for me also and drove me to a hospital. It was supposed to be a program that lasted 3 days. I was in for 31. I remember the day I went vividly. But then it's all dark for almost 20 days. I woke up and my memory has been the same since. I remember January And February of 2023 but the next memory I have is December 6th. The rest is GONE. I don't even have slivers of memories here and there I mean it's all gone and I don't know why
My wife cannot recall most of her childhood before age 8. She surely has PTSD elements, depression, etc. The siblings say nothing happened to her directly, but was frequent witness to physical abuse her brothers suffered. One brother in particular seemed to get the worse of it.
Watch full video series featuring Dr. Ramani HERE: bit.ly/3e7OEcY
I love Dr Ramani's interviews with MedCircle, but she even admits this isn't her area of specialty and, like a lot of people in the comments have said, a lot of what she says isn't accurate with what we know about dissociation and dissociative disorers. Why isn't MedCircle seeking out someone like Dr Mike Lloyd from the CTAD Clinic who is a specialist and works to educate the public? There are experts in dissociation who could provide better info on this.
Hi I've been watching your videos, they connect with me I relate with every of your presentions, firstly I managed to spot my narcissm personality , I believe I'm corvett narcissist as you explained with one of your videos, here is the thing. This was a newly discovered personality by me. Now I've been disaccossiated to every 1, I know people don't want to be in contact with me I got that but, I don't understand why they feel I should be blocked I can't progress Bcoz everything is stoped, I saw your content and I only started to relate, I'm just trying any option, Bcoz this is not life, yes I got the message I will move away from them bt I need to start life
Where is the link to the trauma library? It's *not* in the description box!
🌹❤️😘🌹Kyle and 🌹🌹\(ϋ)/♩🌝 Doctor Ramani 🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹❤️THANK YOU INFINITELY 😭 thank you for your time, dedication and saving my sanity 😍😅 you both 💕 have been a major [miracle sized with harps and angels with bursts of divine revelation,my human earth angels 🌹🌹, I can actively envision '-\`-art=related=to further reach the people who don't speak English AAANNDDD to reach younger ppl] Kyle and Ramani superhero duo for the healthiest version of self and every one in the world ❤️❤️🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹
Ive went 🗣️🗣️🗣️👄🧠🧠👂👐💪👍👁️👁️to different doctor 🤯💯 type things that seem to totally not at all,,
Understanding wut I. Go threw with this kinda thing I go threw ...
I'd really appreciate being able to communicate with DR Ramani,
If there is any way that can be a possibility
I would greatly appreciate it please let me know
Cuz alot of the doctorz I have communicated with ,, does not understand so it gets frustrating for me
I STILL have no memory of being abused as a child,HOWEVER the scars on my head prove a diffrent story. The interesting thing about dissociative amnesia is You don’t know you’ve forgotten until you are “reminded”. The memories are there , but are walled off for protection. In my case, it wasn’t until I saw the extent of the scars on my head did I realize I had “forgotten” (that goodness) the extent of themistreatment. Psilocybin helped trigger memory recall, but only after (in retrospect) knowing I had the support of a therapist who believed me (because what “memories” were coming up felt unbelievable. Too drastic. But the scars correlate to the recalled memories, even though I still have “solid” memory of being abused.). The brain is a BEAUTIFUL thing. It protected me from what I “already knew” until I was ready to know the truth.
Your story mirrors my own. I 'forgot' (feels like that's not the right word) about my traumatizing experience, until I started remembering what it was intended for me to forget. I remembered my first love, someone who my narcissist mother decided was 'bad for' me (read: a dangerous reality-checker who might treat her scapegoat like a worthwhile human being, so he had to be eliminated)...then recalled that I had only remembered him as a platonic friend. I had to ask myself, "How could I have forgotten my first love?? My first kiss? The person I had committed my life to?? And only relegate him to being a platonic pal???" That's when i started seeing the traumatizing event become clearer.
To date, I only have 'snippets' of the event; I am frightened at the thought of remembering more. It's enough, IMO, that I have recalled that it happened. I have had to work through my own doubts and disbelief; who could do that to their own child?? The answer, is lots of people and many do far worse.
I remember the after-effects. Walking around like a robot, someone asking me "What HAPPENED to you??" feeling like I was observing events in my life, the bizarre phobias I developed, the weird 'memories' of some almost ghost like figure from my past, several little conversational snippets, etc.
It was buried deep, but it was always there.
Yes! The human BRAIN has the ability to PROTECT ITSELF! This is just one of the most common, limbic responses to protect yourself and for BASIC SURVIVAL!
I went through almost the exact same thing.
This is what I wanted to try. Nothing else helps. I’m stuck in a vicious circle of hiding the memories and reliving the emotional trauma. But psylocybin is illegal in Poland and I can’t try that.Sad.
You're not alone
Depersonalization is so scary because it comes up on me so randomly and I can feel myself depersonalizing so I have to snap and clap in front of myself to try to bring myself back into the present and to ground myself. Its panic inducing! And it can last for DAYS
Months even years !! It’s the worse ! But it can be healed and u can be whole again! I deal with it all the time I started feeling it last year I’m trying my best to overcome it!! I feel like I’m dealing with my body from the outside in smh very strange!! We got this !
I think it’s the worst when you know it’s coming and it feels like you just woke up. And that dissociated you is the real person. And everything feels fake. Nothing is really happening, you’re not really anywhere. The most extreme I’ve had is literally forgetting bonds I had to family. I knew who the face belonged to but couldn’t feel anything. It was like looking at things. Strangers. Objects. Not my loved ones. I was so terrified I begged for med help and took any drugs the doc gave me bc it was awful.
my only problem w this video - i actually super appreciated how in depth it went into most categories like yes give us that info babey, but depersonalization/derealization disorder is chronic in more patients than i think was expected in the decades past. i am no professional, dr. ramani is and i don't blame her for not mentioning it. i don't know if she's come across chronic cases or has read much about it- but i see a growing number of people complaining of literal years long freaking episodes as mine has been. i haven't felt fully in my body in a really long ass time my entire life revolves around feeling real and has since eighth grade
@@adadove6380 I am so sorry that you are dealing with this. Lucky for me that I experienced shorter versions of this. The way that I finally got over this of years of it was to get into therapy and talk it all out with someone who truly understood. I also had to just allow myself to feel it, label it, and go through it. I once spent a whole day at my therapist's house in an out of body experience but I felt safe there. Years later, I was in that kind of state for about a whole year and I was seeing that therapist 6 days a week. I was thoroughly wrecked but I got through it. Please find a good "fit" for you in a therapist so that you can grow through this and heal. Yes, you can. Life is amazing after that. I still get triggered on a regular basis, but I don't just live in it anymore. A trigger can take a whole day to get over though. Unfortunately some ghosts never die but I am tons better than I used to be. All of the best to you. ❤
@@adadove6380 Yep. I'm the same. It's been, I estimate like 6 or 7 years for me. Really hard to remember when I first started feeling it. Some days it is worse than others but no matter what, it's constant. Hard to remember what it's like to live without it.
My son being murdered put me in a "my feet are not touching the ground". I started reading. I read about Complex PTSD. My repressed memory of being 4 years old and raped by my step-dad. OMG, I cried for that little girl for 2 days till I could call the Incest Survivor Hotline. They gave me the Rape Crisis Center. I got help right away. It took 56 years to finally understand myself.!
RIP your son. I'm sorry these things happened, but also very happy that you're now happy! :,)
@@serensz thank you so much
My hubs just died. I felt like my feet weren't rooted . Intresting that you say this..
@@shereeclinton8741My deepest sympathy for your loss. I know you don’t know me but I hope you have lots of comfort and support.
@@shereeclinton8741
my condolences for your loss; I honestly don't want to even imagine how it'd feel to lose my husband.
But I had recently watched a video where a wife had lost her husband in a very unexpected traumatic accident. They both were only 37 when that had happened to them & there was a statement that the wife had said regarding her loss. But what she had said instantly broke my heart for her. She had said something like "I don't know how to be an adult without him. But I am going to have to be for my children."
I guess it just hit me so much deeper because I can completely understand what she meant by not knowing how t be an adult without her husband; Because they'd been together since they were in their younger years. Which is relatable since I've been with my husband since I had literally just turned 20yo & he was 25yo. I've literally grew up with him & I've only known how to be an "adult" as a pair/couple, not a single person. I wouldn't even know what to do alone. I understand that if it was to be a situation I had to deal with, then as hard as it would be, I would still have to be an adult as different & as difficult as it is to even imagine right now. Ugh 😫
I just pray for everyone who has ever been through, or is currently going through the loss of their partner. I wish you all the strength & courage to get your lives to a new comfortable place.
I've dealt with dissociation that seems to never end. On a "normal" level, I've always felt like I'm in a movie. Like I'm a character & everything is controlled by someone else. On the "high" levels triggered by stress, flashbacks, etc I feel like I'm in a trance. Zoned out on autopilot, forgetful, can't concentrate, & I lose track of time just staring off.
I definitely can relate. Like you’re more aware of moving your arm and how it looks a certain way than like living your life. I have significant chunks of time for almost 5 years I can’t account for. 6 months one time.
Sounds like you have DPDR (depersonalization-derealization disorder)
@@theirishsaint4324 omg the arm thing. don't get me started it;s so bizarre how when i actually snap out of it, rarely as i do my arm is like. my arm. it's like i can see it and i couldn't in a dissociative state i also feel like you just mean when arbitrary things seem more important than like you said your actual life events cus half yr brain, the thinking working parts of yr brain shut down. it's incredibly jarring lol i'm like wait a sec my entire world is crumbling around me and i didn'y know ??? lolol
i feel this though op for me it's been years that i have been dealing w persistent severe dissociation. like i can't feel real by default anymore. my normal state of mind is dissociated
@@adadove6380 yeah, then you’re like wow had whole ass conversations I don’t remember. And like hurt people and I don’t remember
It was until a few days ago when I realized I was disassociating for many years, and I confused it for daydreaming or zoning out. I thought this was normal. When I heard about it on a TH-cam vid, and a girl described it like “you’re watching a movie” and “it feels like the world is not real”, I realized I was mentally separating myself from reality and I do this daily as my getaway. I’m going to schedule an appointment with a therapist, because the more I learn about the different forms of disassociation, the more I realize my mental health was worse than I thought. Though I’m surprised I’ve been able to handle it pretty well. I wonder how much more I’ll discover about myself as I go down this rabbit hole 😅
There's a famous case of a man name Pierre April (a Canadian) who seems to have had a trauma-induced dissociative fugue that lasted Avery unusually long time. He ended up hundreds of miles away from where he was from (Canada).
He remembered looking around, being lost, finding a payphone to call for help,and then realizing he couldn't call for helped because he couldn't remember anyone, including himself, which caused a panic attack.
A Bus driver helped him and he ultimately ended up at a homeless shelter.
They only guessed at his name because it was on a library card in his pocket, but the library was not in Canada.
Unusually, this state lasted for a very long time, months and months. The homeless shelter was helping him gradually piece things together ....for example, he tried guitar and realized within a day that he was able to play well enough to busk for income.
He discovered he knew quite a bit of physics.
He could only faintly remember, gradually, bits about his past, and it tended to be associated with painful headaches....the face and first name of a woman who had been his employer at some point, that he had a cousin Luc who did large engine repair. Sometimes he would remember small pieces of very upsetting past trauma.
It took many months, and outreach to the public, to finally discover who he really was and where he had come from. His family reached out, but Pierre couldn't remember them and was worried about whether they really were his family....they sent him a package of family photos, a copy of his birth certificate, etc, he reunited with them and his memories finally began returning. He ultimately totally regained his memories and "full self"...
It was an unusual case but apparently real.
I watched Paris, Texas a few weeks ago and I wondered if what he did happened to people in real life.
I remember that!
Since my son was murdered 8years ago, I literally don't want to be around many people. I am not comfortable with the evil of people. I have the ability to see things in people that others don't alot of times. It is a gift, and a curse at the same time.
A very good ability, keeps you from getting involved with people who really mentally ill.
Ive told myself this all the time
Thank God for animals ❤
I definitely have experienced disassociative episodes. It seems to happen to me more often when I go into freeze mode, which is my typical response to trauma. As a small child growing up in a family with 2 narcissistic parents, I learned to shut myself down during traumatic events. I now recognize this and am working to heal from it. It takes time. There have been chunks of my life that I literally cannot recall. My kids will remind me of something that I said or did during those times, and I have absolutely no recollection.
Also have 2 narcisist parents, very tough
@@loric7508 it is. You realize that you had a very unhealthy standard for what a relationship should be.
Yeah, I have two narcissistic parents and I'm still coming out from the damage. The panic attacks, dissociative elements under high stress, and complete physical breakdown or health breakdown, been there. And yes, horrible exhaustion follows. My heart rate actually drops to dangerous levels. Thanks to Dr Ramani for all the help tho.
@@GLT2024 I'm so sorry you have and are experiencing this. Sending hugs. It is good to know that we are not alone and that we can and will recover from the damage done. ❤️
Wow- thank you for your comment. I grew up in the same environment. My kids have also reminded me of things I said or did during difficult times and I have absolutely no memory of saying or doing those things. It’s unnerving but I’ve come to the point where I completely believe them.
Within the past year, I recalled a situation of molestation when I was 5 going on 6 years old. I am now 70 years old. I am now talking to a therapist online and I'm trying to figure out what happened. I successfully forgot this event most of my life and now I'm trying to understand why I self-harmed most of my life. It never made sense to me. The only thing I recalled as a child was trying to figure out what the "white stuff" was. I realize now that I was spared those memories. I am not certain my therapist is trained well enough to address my needs but I am grateful I have someone to talk to. We really don't discuss my trauma. Thankfully, I no longer self harm. As I process this, I realize I didn't get the help I needed most of my life. While I am not confident I will get skilled therapy in the future, I realize that disassociation helped me survive.
The trauma in the body/soul never forgets. Its a major violation to our very being. I believe God is wanting to bring healing to you. Yes He could make it all disappear but His ways are not our ways. He walks us through the healing ❤️🩹 💖. Mainly acknowledging what happened, (doesn’t have to be completely clear), absolutely not your fault in any way, go through the tears if needed and then~forgiveness. That is the main thing. For you and your soul💕not them. . I went through something similar with a “forgotten” childhood memory and I too self harmed growing up. God bless you on your journey.
Me too! Same thing about the white stuff ugh I’m sorry for us, hugs!
Hugs to you! I hope you can have a peaceful life.
I have heard this is common for child abuse survivors. I am so sorry for what you went through 💔
You are so smart and brave. And i hope your therapist helps you greatly!
Sending love and light to you precious human 💜✨
...oh
As a child I used to have an extremely difficult time whenever I was expected to recollect and/or narrate any small incident from the past (even from a few minutes ago). This explains a LOT. I was probably dissociated 90% of the time.
Just in my personal opinion, I would get evaluated if you are concerned about it. It could also be a different memory problem…I wouldn’t jump on this as a definite diagnosis. Best of luck!
@@HammerFamily4 They won't make a diagnosis in my city, I gotta go drive 2 1/2 hrs away to see a specialist, that will then give me the piece of paper I need, to explain my EXTREMELY odd behavior lol! knowing good and well, that I'm not gonna get a SSI check to fall back on in case i call my boss or coworker a bad word 1 day when she/he might? be in a bad mood lmao! causing me to get fired and later hungry haha, good! god, what a complete joke! Lol! the fact I have to spend $ and time to go do that to make a lil progress haha.
Ddlg abdl age regression my channel
Kinda similar to me, but when I was a child I had really good memory. But after a certain event in life, my memory became really bad that I had difficulty remembering what I was doing moments ago. It has slightly gotten better without treatment but it comes back every now and then. Like someone in the replies said, I'm not entirely sure it's dissociation but it could be a milder version.
In 2013, the man I was married to attempted to kill me. Much of my memory leading up to the event, of the event itself, and the weeks/months following the event is non-existent. I remember only brief moments: laying on the ground and looking into a campfire, being carried to a vehicle, the ER physician probing a laceration on my head and informing someone that my skull was exposed. Due in large part to my inability to remember (much less relay to a jury) the events of the assault, he was able to plead out. He received a 36 month sentence for his attempt on my life and served about 18 months of that. When this doctor makes the statement that mental health should be driving policy, she could not be speaking a louder truth. For many of us, the criminal justice system only serves to deepen our trauma and denies us the dignity and, well, justice that we deserve!
I’m in a permanent state of depersonalisation and have been all my life. My mum told me I was born 6 weeks early and nearly died and I’m convinced that whatever medical procedures I experienced in 1961 as a new born baby is responsible for this feeling that I’m not really here or that I’m watching my life on a movie screen. In my 20s I saw a psychiatrist who told me my condition was called depersonalisation. I’ve just accepted it and got on with life as there is nothing else I can do about it. During my lifetime I’ve been involved with a couple of abusive partners and to get me through it I used to think ‘well I’m not really here anyway’ and that somehow kept me going until I got rid of those men from my life. I find that if I keep myself busy everyday that I can stop myself dwelling on it that I can push it to the back of my mind. It would be amazing not to have it but scary at the same time as I don’t know any different.
I think I know that feeling.. I don’t spend much time in this reality, either. It is scary, heavy, noisy... Everything is bright and sharp and I feel vulnerable, and even tho the world is beautiful, there are so many ugly things going on that I usually escape at some point, whether I want to or not. Idk where I go, but I’m not here. Confusing. I said in another comment here that ”I feel like a dream”. That’s as good as I can describe it. Could you try coming into this reality to spend time with things that make you feel happy and safe? Animals, humans, gardening, painting, playing outside or just walking - these are just examples - simple things☺️ I swear it’s a beautiful world, and much of it is worth experiencing! I wish you all the best💗 HUGs from Finland🖤🐺
I think you would feel so extremely disoriented if you got rid of chronic depersonalization somehow. The experience between "normal" and dissociated is vastly different. I think it would be even more distressing to go from depersonalization to normal than the other way around- everything would feel very real, everything would feel like it matters. You'd feel emotions- good and bad, inside yourself. You'd feel love and care and concern for certain people and for yourself. But you'd also feel sorrow, anger, disappointment, grief. I don't know, maybe it is still a good idea to try? So you don't miss out on any more of your life.
I pray for everyone who has this!! God delivers from demon possession. “Jesus rebuked the demon, and it came out of the boy, and he was healed at that moment.”
Matthew 17:18 NIV
Jesus did it for me! He will do it for you too🙏🙏🙏
@@kristiinakapinen2071 I pray for everyone who has this!! God delivers from demon possession. “Jesus rebuked the demon, and it came out of the boy, and he was healed at that moment.”
Matthew 17:18 NIV
Jesus did it for me! He will do it for you too🙏🙏🙏
God Will deliver you!
I experienced a Dissociative Fugue and was actually considered a missing person for nearly two months. I was found wandering at a truck stop sincerely asking people, "Do you know who I am?" It was a scary experience. 😨
I had one of these. It lasted about four days then finally I “woke up”. Until then I knew that I should know my own name but I just didn’t. I had no memories at all for that period and I just wandered around trying to stay under everyone’s radar so no-one would find out.
@Sarah Bannister maybe it's lagging to stop you from leaving inane comments on videos about mental health topics.
I had one of these. It lasted 24 hrs. 8 yrs later I have no memory.
@@gloriaknott7448 - Apparently, we both experienced some severe trauma. 😬
@@Trollophile I did for years.
I’ve experienced dissociative amnesia since I was 17. It may have started sooner, as my whole childhood was one 18-years-long trauma. The thing that really bothers me about it, is that I don’t know when it happens, unless someone was with me. My therapist said it was a gift from god. I’d rather my gift had been a family who loved me.
❤️
It’s never too late to heal.
I pray for everyone who has this!! God delivers from demon possession. “Jesus rebuked the demon, and it came out of the boy, and he was healed at that moment.”
Matthew 17:18 NIV
Jesus did it for me! He will do it for you too🙏🙏🙏
melissadadzie59, we certainly do not have devils. The Narcissist may. I didn’t know I had lost memories until encountering a childhood friend I had no memory of. The poor fellow was hurt that I couldn’t remember him. The Lord has healed me greatly in recent years.
Psalm 34: 18 The LORD is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart; and saveth such as be of a contrite spirit.
KJV
Yes. Ditto. Sometimes someone will say are you ok. My adult children yell at me for not listening. Happened today.
I was always in a constant thought of what is wrong with me? Why do i act and feel the way I am. This video really opened my eyes and brought emotions to me. I feel so numb and i feel like im in a movie or bubble going about my day. Such a weird feeling but anyone dealing with this.. we got this!!!
There are some types of dissociation that are totally normal, one of the most common examples being driving home from work and not remembering the drive because it’s so familiar.
Everyone does that
Yes me
I suffer from chronic migraines, anxiety, panic attacks and depression I experience disassociation during especially painful periods or high stress times. When she said you operate in a robotic way that's exactly how it feels. I will often not feel like I recognize my own reflection in the mirror.
Don’t listen to what that person wrote! You can’t see alters in eyes.
It sounds like you may benefit from speaking with a mental health professional. Possibly one that is trained in trauma. If I am understanding correctly you experience periods of pain. Chronic pain is traumatic and can also be the result of trauma. I experience chronic pain and everything you mention above. For me all of it, even the pain, is related to trauma. Now that I know I have trauma in my past I am able to start working through it.
Omg i will also do this. As if im on the backseat watching alter me controlling the body. I will know who i am supposed to be, but i don't allign to it. Often will talk broken English due to altered thought patterns and a reduced experienced of the world.
Bruh, one time I looked in the mirror and jumped back because I literally did not recognise myself and scared myself. For me it's a combination of trauma and a physical injury, so I'd recommend looking into that.
I am missing complete chunks of my life, mainly in childhood through teen years. It wasn't until a few years ago a counselor told me he felt my memory had been affected by anxiety. I believe he meant exactly what you guys are talking about.
I pray for everyone who has this!! God delivers from demon possession. “Jesus rebuked the demon, and it came out of the boy, and he was healed at that moment.”
Matthew 17:18 NIV
Jesus did it for me! He will do it for you too🙏🙏🙏
Self care during trauma triggers would make an excellent topic! So tired of hearing all the labels and symptoms but not hearing simple techniques that might help someone feel better in the moment.
I started carrying a Rosary constantly after losing my husband of 44 years, even when sleeping, even though I wasn't Catholic. It brings me so much comfort that I converted to Catholic and I still carry the Rosary constantly and now I pray it twice daily. Also listening to Gregorian chant helps me. I love Harpa Dei. 🙏💝🌼🌿
On that note, I appreciate hearing the terms and symptoms because those things are key in understanding how any disorder works, which is always going to be the first step in any sort of treatment or self-help anyway
You can find a list of simple and minimally impactful strategies on other videos. The more complex the disorder, the more important it is to use strategies that do not make you worse. Thus this therapist is trying to tell people she is not skilled enough to even diagnose, let alone treat, DID.
I have de-personalized for hours/days, just not talking, feeling completely empty, and having no emotion. Nothing is worse than hurting.
I hope u are healed and happy and whole
That's how I feel for the last 20 years
I’ve experienced a dissociative event that I recall really clear. It was the weirdest feeling I’ve ever experienced. I started to feel strangely different when it happened. I remember my ex partner who I believe is a narcissist based on his repeated actions aligning with the description of the personality. It was the day I left him. He went into another episode of rage that day, yelling at the top of his lungs and threatening me after what he did that day..I remember in the moment it was happening as I was looking at him, I couldn’t believe this was the person I chose to share my life with and I was trying to in the moment make myself see what I wasn’t trying to see, what I wasn’t trying to acknowledge was my reality. And right after I did that the feeling started happening. The best way I could describe it is: I still kept hearing him but I heard him different his yelling started sounding more and more distant (I was literally right in front of him at this point) so I knew it wasn’t normal and I have perfect hearing. But I sort of froze in that moment. I almost felt like I couldn’t talk. But it was important to me to feel it out so I didn’t try to stop it, it became scary when I started seeing myself from above the experience I was having in real time from literally outside my body. The way I took it after it all happened was like a sign that this person I had imagined my entire life with, he wasn’t for me. He had issues I couldn’t help him with and was actively causing me and our daughter a lot of harm. And he didn’t care. It was heartbreaking to finally see that. And I don’t know exactly just how long I was in that experience but I remember I sorta snapped out of it when I started being able to hear clearly again and by this time, he had stopped yelling for a moment. I took one look at my 3 month old daughter thought about all the things I’d have to go through raising my baby alone as a single mother and I had an idea of how’d that all look because my mom was a single mother also, then I looked back at my ex that was back yelling and all his dramatics and I told him to get the f* out of my house and never come back. I will always remember the stunned look on his face. I’ve been through a lot of things before him but when I seen I would have perpetuated the trauma onto my daughter with him, it gave me the strength I needed to start my healing journey. I wanted it to stop with me. And doing it felt like I was cutting my own arm off, it was so difficult to go through. But I made the right decision. He tried to return - I’ve never gone back. ♥️
This is so similar to my experiences with my life with an ex. I totally understand what you went through. Keep strong 💪
Congrats for leaving a toxic relationship, it is so hard! Stay strong!
@ Candy, thank u for sharing your Not so good relationship and the traumatizing experiences u and yur daughter suffered through. I've pretty much went through a similar relationship / marriage as yours.The part where you talked about looking at your daughter and making that important decision to tell him to leave and never come back was your spiritual and God like self taking charge of how you and your daughter wish to live out your lives happily, compared to being treated as just some uncaring man's doormat. I'm so happy you and your daughter survived this and had the sense to finally speak up and make the demon leave as I had just gone through this again with my own 23-year-old daughter the emotional and the physical abuse is the hardest and the most traumatizing of what they do in front of us it's almost as if they have two different personalities and no conscience I pray you and your daughter stay healthy happy and safe in your newfound Journey in both your future lives. Blessings, minister Diane www.thewaythetruthandthelifedivinejesus.blogspot.com
i experienced exactely the same!! its this out of body experience of "waking up", thinking "who is this person, how did i get here"
God bless you for sharing.. it is more healing than you know .. praying for your life to be blessed and improve every day.
When I was a little girl, my mom had a horrible boyfriend and he did some really bad things. We went to court for what happened. I think I changed something I said. I remember the lawyers being so upset with me for saying I couldn’t remember. They said, “you forget what you ate yesterday. Maybe even what you wore the day before, but you don’t forget something traumatic happens to you.” I always thought about how I was a “liar.” Plus, I always felt guilty about getting people in trouble so I stopped talking about anything bad that happened in my life. Now even when something hurtful happens too me or I do bad things myself I can’t remember. I feels like i genuinely black out. Sometimes in moments I feel exactly how she said. I’m watching things happen to me from outside of my body with my head turned and one eye closed. Talking about this makes me feel physically sick.
Stay strong sister, hope you may find the help you need and heal❤️
It wasn't your fault.
I'm so sorry that happened to you
Courts are sometimes ignorant of science, but nowadays I feel they are cognizant but just evil.
I struggled with disassociation in grief a lot in the first year after I lost my best friend. Life felt like I was playing in a video game at times and like I was just looking at life from the outside. I one day couldn’t remember my middle name and thought I was losing it. My therapist told me what it was and that my mind was trying to protect me in a way. I don’t feel like that much anymore very rarely and it’s been two years. Thankful to be here still.
Since losing my wife I have felt moments where everything outside of my home didn’t feel real, like you say, almost as if it was a video game.
I am due to start counselling soon though, so hopefully that is in my past.
what helped you?
During my episodes of dissociation, it was always like the world around me became an ephemeral shadow realm. My perception desaturated the world around me and made it seem grey, cloudy, muted, and insubstantial. Like I was the only tangible thing, and everything else was made of fog. There were times it felt like I could pass my hands through the objects around me, not because I wasn’t real, but because they weren’t. The thing is, I wasn’t hallucinating; the world was there, and if I touched it, it felt solid (if distant), and my hands didn’t pass through it. I knew it was my perception that was distorted. But knowing that didn’t really change my interpretation.
Even now, I experience some level of dissociation on a regular basis. Now it feels more like I’m in a glass box or cloaked in some kind of force field that acts as a barrier between me and the rest of the world. It makes it just a little harder to stay ground, stay present, and stay connected to my life.
That is called derealization. That was the last dissosiative symptom (during depression and anxiety disorder) that went away. Earlier I had had also depersonalization and once paralysis. At one point, I used to experience derealization every time I went to supermarket. Too much stimuli.
What helped me was the fact that I knew about dissosiative symptoms prior to having actual dissoasitive episodes...and I knew, that it is NORMAL response of mind for extreme emotions. Extreme boredom when driving car...you dissosiate...and 20km later you realize you have no memory of it. Extreme happiness when getting proposed/proposing...you would not remember anything of that. Being extremely scared...you might again dissosiate. Dissosiation is nothing to be scared of. It is annoying, but if you remember, what triggered your dissosiative episode, it can be extremely helpful when prosessing trauma in therapy! At least, it was very helpful for me.
Sadly Ramani did not talk about normal dissosiation as it is part of spectrum and would probably help people to be less scared of their dissosiative episodes.
When I dissociate, I feel numb like after a few drinks. I am also losing some inhibition asking phone number to someone I would barely know while in general, I am really shy.
Has anyone ever had a dissociative episode where there was complete disorientation (not knowing which was was up, down, left, right, what street/area, and not remembering name or year etc)?
I pray for everyone who has this!! God delivers from demon possession. “Jesus rebuked the demon, and it came out of the boy, and he was healed at that moment.”
Matthew 17:18 NIV
Jesus did it for me! He will do it for you too🙏🙏🙏
Personally for me and actually felt like the world was too realistic like a hyper realistic feeling where I felt every single thought that came to mine and perceived every single thing with a third person perspective.
I spent most of my life out side myself 😢 I am 56 years old. I been fight to stay in my body. It's been 10 months since I left my body. I am excited about my healing. It's the hardest thing I have ever had to do. Thank you for your education.🙏❤️
I pray for everyone who has this!! God delivers from demon possession. “Jesus rebuked the demon, and it came out of the boy, and he was healed at that moment.”
Matthew 17:18 NIV
Jesus did it for me! He will do it for you too🙏🙏🙏
@@melissadadzie59 Ew, stop. Leave
When I was a pre-teen and teen, I would sometimes have a fleeting feeling/thought of: Is this real? Is my life real? Like I suddenly woke up to a different reality/channel. It would go away pretty quickly, but it was a scary event. Now I recognize it as depersonalization disorder. I used to write it off as "hormones," but now I see that there was a huge environmental element.
Hi 👋 how are you doing?
Same… I thought it was normal before I was told it wasn’t
Hello! I grew up and around that age range, I asked myself the exact same questions!! I thought it was a "super power", or something like it. It also usually occurred every Sunday morning. I don't know why? Then I would dissociate during high-emotional conflicts/confrontations. I'm hoping to try EMDR treatment soon. It's a non-invasive trauma-based therapy.
You described exactly what I experienced as a pre-teen! However, it would happen in “clusters” over and over again each minute - for maybe 5 minutes total). I can’t remember how often these episodes occurred. I’m just in shock that others have experienced similar things!
i always felt really weird abt those waking up to a different reality feelings. sometimes i'd jus literally be casually walking somewhere and my brain would switch, i started becoming convinced i might actually be in another world it was so strange of a feeling lol
I've experienced a lot of serious mental issues, physical too, but depersonalization is by far the most awful and the most difficult to ignore. It doesn't sound that bad to people that don't know the feeling, because it's literally impossible to imagine what it feels like unless you've had it. It's so strange and difficult to describe that even when I am not currently experiencing it, I can't fully imagine/remember how it actually feels, even if it was just minutes ago, which made me realize that if I can't even fully appreciate how my own disorder feels when i'm not currently in an episode, then there is no chance i'll ever be able to get someone who hasn't had it to properly grasp the feeling... It took me over a year to even be able to put it in to the right words to actually google it and look it up, like trying to describe a color only you can see.
The only way to kind-of describe it is as if you are watching a video recording of your own real-time perspective, you hear your own voice as if it's coming from outside you, your vision can lag to the point of it seeming like a stop-motion series of frames. Technically nothing seems to look different, or sound different, there isn't a specific physical sensation either, yet, everything is just terribly wrong. It's an invisible nightmare that seems to have no tangible features, yet completely consumes your experience. And, just like you can never experience or remember the moment that you fall asleep, you can never really experience the moment you transition back to reality, rather you realize that it went away while you were distracted by something else shortly after it's gone. Bizarre to say the least.
Oh my god this was so perfect for describing this experience.
Sounds like the definition of exulansic
Shiit, It had happened to me smoking weed, if I would knew that could happened... I also remember that I couldn't understand peoples face expressions. They seem like empty shells to me, with no emotions :|
@@eduardomoroyoqui622 i 100% have. Been there and its not fun. Drug induced disassociation is no less worse than mental health disassociation and should be taken just as seriously 💚
@@goldust369 its really crazy finally learning a term to put to words what youve known or done most your life
I am an LMHC. I work with clients with DID using Ego State Therapy, Internal Family Systems and Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing. I work in private practice. It is NOT as rare as this woman is making it sound. According to the DSM, it is up to 5 times more prevalent in the general population than Schizophrenia. In private practice, in the past 4 years, I have officially diagnosed more than a dozen clients with DID under consultation with an EMDR dissociative specialist, with whom I consult monthly. You DO need specialized training to work with these clients but sadly, more clinicians are working with DID clients and they don't realize it. Pretty much any client who is seen as "treatment resistant" or has a list of 5 or more diagnoses over the past 5+ years should be assessed for DID. The over-arching rule within DID systems is to "hide the system" often even from the person, who this woman refers to as the "host." Propagating the belief DID is rare leads to so many clients continuing to be diagnosed inaccurately, receiving ineffective treatment, resulting in hopelessness and often rejection from professionals frustrated with the lack of progress. Just like in medical medicine, if a treatment is not working, the doctors rethink the diagnosis and try another form of treatment. Sadly, in mental health, if the client does not improve, professionals blame the client for not trying hard enough or resisting treatment. Very likely, the clinician has the client misdiagnosed and thus is treating them as behavioral when in fact, they are dissociative. "Behavioral" implies they could simply change their behaviors given sufficient motivation and skills. "Dissociative" is outside the control of the individual and needs to be addressed very differently. Every dissociative part comes by their perspective, coping strategy, emotions, beliefs, honestly. They're not trying to frustrate clinicians. They simply will not shift their functioning until they are convinced it is safe to do so. #1 goal with dissociative clients is establishing safety in the now and connecting parts to this reality. So, I beg of the mental health community to get more training in dissociation. You are dealing with it whether you like it or not and not knowing what you are seeing is at very least delaying your clients' healing and potentially causing them harm.
Hi 👋 how are you doing?
So well said and true! Unfortunately so many professionals are under the impression its rare, that they don’t see it when its in front of them. I tried for most of my life with many professionals all to be labeled “treatment resistant “. I do so much better on my own.
Thank you for saying this. It's true & absolutely needs to be said.
Tell me about it... I never even realized there were tripwires and safeguards and warning bells all over my mind, to stop me remembering, until I was well over 30. And then I poked at my memory enough that the block in it started talking to me. And I don’t see how no one caught it. Hell - even in hospital they saw me regress to a child and also heard me speak of “the others in my head” and they never even wrote that stuff into my file. I only remembered this later, after I found the block. They just treated me for psychosis. But the “psychosis” *never. went. away.* And I’m still learning to live with it - live with a half a brain, just floating thru.. I feel like I’m a dream.
Melissa Belding-are you taking new clients? I live in New York and haven’t found a therapist to help me. My high stress levels have me dissociating (mind fog for me)
more than ever and it’s hard to tolerate. Others can see it’s happening to me too
I have listened to many doctors here on youtube about complex ptsd and it has really improved my life besides emdr and cognitive therapy
Wonderful. You got this!
I've fallen asleep on my therapist's couch within seconds while trying to do cbt. It was so scary for me to realize how bad I actually was. I was assaulted as a child for years in the worst ways possible, and life didn't improve after that for a long, long time.
I have Complex PTSD and when remembering what happened to me, I experience dissociation. It always feels like watching a movie of another person. I know it happened to me, but I feel like it’s a different person sometimes. Especially during panic attacks, like a shell of a person inside another person. If that makes sense.
Hey i get it its a russian doll
I also have a russian doll and probable cptsd thats why even if i dont remembre just trying To makes me dissasociate those memorias from me cuz i can feel it all the time just not specifically i feel alienated so gracias for putting it into words i couldnt Believe myself i was scared también its lonely
Bruh and then you feel guilty for the panic. I feel like I’m faking like it’s my fault like there’s no reason for it. I can’t breath, im shaking and crying and suddenly something snaps and im stuck out of me watching her being like why she dramatic what’s wrong with her she’s awful but I still can’t control my body.
I experience nightmares in which I wake up wondering how I am going to continue helping to lead my now younger 2 adult children away from hardship too.
GET PROFESSIONAL HELP ASAP...
My mother and maternal grandmother did something extremely traumatizing to me when I was a teen; I had no memory of it until recently (I'm 52). I believe that it would qualify as torture.
Even now, I only remember 'snapshots' of seemingly unrelated moments, and am unable to tie them together. I do not want to remember any more, because my memory has provided me with enough detail of the things they were trying to force me to forget; namely, a relationship with someone they thought was 'wrong' for me.
I think it's okay to proceed in life without having that full memory come to me. I'm satisfied knowing why I dissociated (felt like floating / observing my life many times), and why I developed bizarre phobias as a teen. I just don't know what value it would bring at this point to know any greater details. it really brings me into a state of utter despair when a new memory of it surfaces and I find I have to nap because it is exhausting.
Of course you are the ONLY person who can decide if seeking those memories may be beneficial. One benefit from working with a trusted therapist to retrieve those memories in a safe place is to process them so they can no longer bubble up to the surface on their terms. When you know the beast, you can more effectively avoid triggers and be less impacted by triggers when they do still occur. A good therapist (not an easy ask, I know), can help you navigate your memories and reframe them in your mind so that you have more control, instead of being controlled by them (either overtly by triggers, or unconsciously by learned behaviors.) It gives you more options. And again, if you have found a healthy balance and decide that therapy isn’t the right fit for you right now, then you are right! Therapy doesn’t always work for everyone, and it really can’t work unless the client wants to try it for themselves. You are the expert on yourself. ❤
And to add: I completely agree, we don’t need to have a perfect memory of everything that has happened in our lives! For one thing, nobody does (except something like less than 100 people in the world, who describe it as disabling!), and for another thing, our brains are amazing at keeping us sane, by callousing off the pain! It isn’t physical, but that doesn’t mean it’s not real. We just don’t understand the mechanisms yet, but I think when we do, it will be clear that slight dissociative “scar-tissue/callous” is typical!
Hey, if the memories are showing up its a good time to hop on the shadow work train. It's your inner child looking for healing and reconnection. Are you going to let yourself back in? Otherwise you might get overwhelmed if you push it all away. Glad you were able to recollect your memory. It must have been horrid especially if you are 52. Good luck.
I just educated myself. I was totally ignorant. I failed to help a family member when asked for advice and help. I just feel very guilty and confused. Dr. Ramani is very professional and impressive speaker. Thanks
Please forgive yourself. One person tried to help me but was unable. You have to have experience and training in trauma to really know how to help someone. You did what you could and your family hopefully knows that.
@@Hawaiiansky11 ❤️
❤️
You didn't know better but now you do so you can do better. :) ❤ But still you are not a professional, only professionals can work properly around that. :)
Learning that dissociation is normal and everyone does it really helped me. I have dissociation more on the severe end and one thing that made it worse was trying to "get rid of" it because I felt embarrassed about it. We all do it, it can happen when you're overwhelmed or even just bored.
Very true, but when it can get u fired from a job , sued for sexual harassment, or make u a target 🎯 for a violent crime such as a sneak attack ,ambush ,assault with a deadly weapon haha, yeah I think? we've went a lil past that now haven't we ? Lmao!
@@chaosdweller I'm not sure how it could get you sued for sexual harassment?
@@e_i_e_i_bro are we? really talking "legal technicalities " on a video about a mental illness video? lmao! what?
That's it ? nothing else to say? about this actual subject? ... haha.
@@chaosdweller wut
@@e_i_e_i_bro idk? 😳🤔🤕stop ! quit! ...... 😆
I used to be absolutely terrified when I dissociated. The best way I can explain it is that it'll feel like I become incredibly aware of the idea we might be living in the matrix. That nothing around me is real and I'm not even real. I was so scared of this when it happened that I felt like I couldn't talk to anyone about it or I might fully lose my mind and get locked in that state forever. This has happened randomly ever since I was little. Last year I finally got into trauma therapy and realized I am experiencing dissociation which is actually quite normal. I was so scared to tell my therapist all this. I'm a year into trauma work with a lot left to go, but honestly I forgot the progress I made in this area. I understand my body is trying to protect me and in ways appreciate that. I can talk about it now and know I for sure won't become stuck in another dimension or whatever for doing so. It's no longer terrifying. I might still get moments of fear, but I can now calm and sooth myself. This was a nice reminder of my progress tonight. Thanks youtube.
Yess the matrix thing is spot on - i become so unsure of whether I'm real or not, and I'm desperate for human contact or proof that I exist. It is incredibly scary, I completely understand.
Right? One way I cope is by giving myself "rules" for how to behave in each "world" because whichever one I'm in at the moment is the one that feels "real" so... I try to build a life in both/all of them. I hope this helps.
I dissociate and have CPTSD. I am blessed with a wonderful trauma therapist who is helping me process my trauma whenever it comes up. She walked me through one of my biggest traumas in such a beautiful, gentle way. I was able to talk to myself at 18 years old, when I was raped, and release that trauma, which happened almost 40 years ago.
Dr. Ramani is amazing. I love her channel, and how easy going she is. Thank you for sharing yourself and your knowledge with us. You have helped SO many people!! 👼
(Edited for spelling and spelled Dr.'s named wrong!!)
From "DSM 5, Many individuals with dissociative identity disorder present with a comorbid disorder. If not assessed and treated specifically for the dissociative disorder, these individuals often receive prolonged treatment for the comorbid diagnosis only, with limited overall treatment response and resultant demoralization, and disability.."
This woman is so interesting. I love watching her videos. So intelligent and I love the way she explains such complex subjects in a very informative and relatable way
I know right Kelly.
DID isn't as rare as they first thought. The numbers they have are based on the overt DID, many of us have covert DID and don't even know we have it. Dissociative identity disorder statistics vary but show that the condition occurs in anywhere from 0.5% to 2% of the population. Other dissociative identity disorder facts suggest that about seven percent of the general population may have the disorder, but remain undiagnosed.
Most current studies place the prevalence of dissociative identity disorder (DID) between 0.1% to 2%, though a few give estimations as high as 3-5%. The DSM-5-TR gives the 12-month prevalence of DID in a small community of American adults as 1.5%, and lifetime prevalence in a representative sample of Turkish women as 1.1% (American Psychiatric Association, 2022). As reviewed by Kate et al. (2019), other general population estimates obtained with dissociation-specific screening or diagnostic tools have ranged from 0.8% to 1.5%, with an additional 0.2% to 8.3% for other specified dissociative disorder (OSDD), which may or may not present as similar to DID. Dissociative disorders as a whole ranged from 3.0% to 18.3%.
Source did-research.org/did/basics/prevalence
also I think its so gross to question people who claim to have DID on youtube and say they're most likely faking, it's so dangerous and harmful, it's not that rare, same as gingers or even people that are intersex
I’m very suprised by that judgemental and dismissive attitude. I thought that they may give some sort of approval..By the look of videos it’s almost impossible to diagnose someone,if I’m not mistaken, I use to like her the way she articulates but after I listen many other professionals..It’s not that uncommon. Especially in America and Turkey there is numbers in increase..Not has been started another discussion about if there is any cultural base on …So i think she needs to update her statistics..
So...as rare as schizophrenia. Meaning that it is unlikely that anyone in your family has it, at work has it, or at school has it. This is indeed rare. Far more common are CPTSD and derealization or depersonalization. And thank goodness DID is rare. These folks attempt suicide far more often, can find it difficult/impossible to work and need repeated hospitalizations, and can be abused as adults.
Incorrect. DID occurs at the she rate as schizophrenia or ocd. Approx 1% of the population. Statistically that is not rare! And given its a disorder which is supposed to be hidden, you probably wouldn't even know if sometime in your life had it.
I can remember feeling like I was watching a movie of my life instead of living it, when my mom was raging and yelling when I was a child. I used to envy those who said they can't remember much of anything from their childhood because I can remember in small details almost every single horrible thing that was said and done to me and these memories find a a way to randomly pop up in my mind, causing me to freeze and feel out of body again.
Depersonalization has been my experience. I am glad they spoke about it.
I first dissociated when I was being SA’d. I was floating above myself, looking down at my body but not feeling anything. For years after that, I would dissociate whenever I felt threatened, such as when someone got angry near me (it didn’t even have to be AT me, just NEAR me). It took a lot of therapy and work, but I am able to stay present most of the time now.
thanks. Your progress gives me hope for mine!
@@FlyHoneyBre it’s not easy, but it’s worth the work!
@ctobolsk Schizophrenia is. Splited mind and hallucinations. You thought you were floating but in reallity you had hallucinations. And also borderline, when you believe that you are someone else than you are.
DID is not as rare as said here. I have DID and after several years I was able to find an amazing therapist who knows how to treat it.
The information seems very outdated so you’re right
I, also have DID. Formally diagnosed and under the care of a Psychologist which specializes in DID. Decades the medical establishment diagnosed me virtually every mental disorder out there. I do not watch the Tic toc, you tube's of people "using" their alters for show. This is a very difficult "defense mechanism " mental disorder to live with. It's not just having alters, it also includes depression, PTSD, insomnia, and very intense insecurity and overwhelming feelings of not being "safe". It should not be put on display for entertainment.
There’s a growing body of research showing it’s not rare at all, not sure why they emphasized that it is
i’ve been dealing with drug induced dissociation for years. i’d smoked weed for years and never had a bad reaction to it, and suddenly here i am 2 years later not feeling real and not being able to function on the day-to-day. an indescribable feeling, truly. i cant wait for it to end
For me it feels like being in a different dimension, or a parallel universe where everything around me looks the same but doesn't feel the same. I have BPD and after traumatic events, it's for the best when my head shuts down in this way. It's not a healthy way to exist long term, but it helped me get through some really hard stuff. I wouldn't have wanted to be present in my body and my mind.
bpd sucks. I feel your pain.
I pray for everyone who has this!! God delivers from demon possession. “Jesus rebuked the demon, and it came out of the boy, and he was healed at that moment.”
Matthew 17:18 NIV
Jesus did it for me! He will do it for you too🙏🙏🙏
Yep same
Me too 😢
The world science community accepted the parallel universe theory back in the early 1990s. I believed in the parallel universe theory before it became an acceptance theory. I theorize that is where alters come from. Some scientists also theorize we exist in an imagination and here is where I theorize alters can be also be created by ourselves. Schizophrenias too I theorize are communicating with other schizophrenias from other parallel universes. Because science and we ourselves do not fully understand DID (PTSD too for me) it drives us crazy?
I almost cried when she mentioned being taken away during sex, my girlfriend luckily is super generous and understanding and it’s almost a sport to get me at times to pull through, we’ll be super into it and I’m like yes I got this and then out of no where freak out because I have an episode and we talk about it and it’s just so frustrating to deal with and at first, embarrassing but to have spent this much time understanding where it comes from and what it means I believe a part of healing from it definitely comes from trauma therapy and creating a layout of the reality of the past, of adding understanding to what happened and why at such a young age. To give that little kid or teenager or young adult who went through whatever it may be that sense of security that they are validated and it did happen and it’s over and it can’t happen again. That definite answer that someone can give us. I think is the healing factor
OH, HONEY!! I am so sorry.
The, as I started reading your comment, I thought you were about to make light of all this/ be a bit perverted.
Anyways, I'm sorry for your hurts and encouraged by your hopefulness.
@@rainbowsandkittens1537 yeah I got everyone in the first half haha
Thank you for your viewpoint on possibly recalling traumatic memories. It got through to me. I needed to hear it in the exact way you phrased it.
@@angelheart.444 of course, I’m glad I was able to be heard by you and also help you out a bit
Marry her, too many selfish people would not be as understanding as her
The brain is such an interesting organism. My sister & I had the similar abusive experiences from early infancy with a malignant narcissist mother who abused us physically, emotionally & psychologically, and a negligent father. We both have CPTSD & we both have dissociative disorders. But we differ in how we experience this dissociation. For me, I don’t remember large chunks of my childhood. I know the abuse was constant, but as far as remembering instances themselves I only remember a handful of particular details of some events. So I experience Dissociative Amnesia. I also have experienced depersonalisation, particularly during periods of severe depression, post natal particularly, or during instances of extreme conflict. My sister is completely different. She remembers absolutely everything. On the lesser end for her is depersonalisation but on the extreme end she has experienced fugues during a time when she was extremely ill. She would lose time, she would drive places and not know how she got there. She was really very sick. So I find it really interesting & I can only think that it comes down to our different personality types & family roles during childhood & how they affected the way we experienced the trauma. I very much retreated into an internal world & shut myself away from people. I escaped into books a lot, I had imaginary friends & played imaginary games & scenarios in my head, and I spent a lot of time alone in my room. My sister was what I guess you’d call the squeaky wheel. And also pushed herself to overachieve athletically to try and win love, to the point where the abuse became part of what happened with her athletics. The way the brain adapts is so very interesting to me.
Your story is exactly mine. I was you, my sister was your sister, but instead of athletics she threw herself into academics. I did exactly all the things you mentioned you did. It was surreal reading your comment. Best wishes to you and your sister 💜
@@thewizardshu6695 oh wow. Interested to know, do you have other siblings? I have two other siblings who say they don’t believe abuse happened because they didn’t experience it the way my sister & I did. We’ve had to cut off everyone in the family & just rely on each other. It has been incredibly difficult. I, too, wish nothing but healing and love for yourself & your sister.
@@Wonderkell74 oh my gosh, this is definitely very surreal the similarities. Yes we have a brother and he wasn’t abused. I think it’s because he was the only son and he occupied the golden child role (if you haven’t seen Dr. Ramani’s video about the narcissistic family dynamic like the scapegoat and golden child etc. I recommend it) I think my mom had some internalized misogyny, because she was always harsh in her judgement towards women. No matter what he did he got a free pass. He doesn’t get it at all and he’s pretty callous. My sister and I haven’t cut them all off but we don’t speak to them as much and when we do it’s usually quick. We never visit, but the two of us are close to each other.
I’m sorry to hear it’s been hard for you both but I’m glad that you both have each other and you’re not alone. I promise you’ll get through this, you’ve been through worse. Now you both get to focus on yourselves and heal. Thank you for the well wishes
@@thewizardshu6695 that’s so surreal! Both of my other siblings, a sister & the youngest in the family is a boy, they are both golden children. I wish you & your sister all the very best x
I doubt my childhood was as severe as yours, constant emotional neglect & abuse & minimal physical (mostly by elder sibs) but i too have very little memory of my childhood. I remember telling my mom this, maybe in my 20s? And she said something like “thats not good.” End of discussion… i appreciate having a name for it now. & yes i have moments of memory, mostly frozen moments vs a running scene even… i also feel i and my mom, go into personalities by rote that we cant turn off & sometimes dont remember later.
I'm diagnosed by a specialist with over twenty years experience with what she called a "mild" form of DID. My diagnosis is OSDD. If you think of DID being on a spectrum, I'm on the less severe side. I truly believe that we will see a lot more people presenting with this disorder when we realize two things: one being it's not as rare as once believed. And two being it is a spectrum disorder.
I experience disassociation on a regular basis. I explain to my wife that it’s like being in “Who Framed Roger Rabbit.” Where half the world is cartoon characters. I suffer from PTSD, Schizoaffective and Borderline Personality Disorder.
Blessings to you.
Thank you @MonicaMagic
Thanks for sharing. I think I needed to hear this information. I think it's applicable to someone that I love and care about. It's challenging to know how to be there for them. I believe that nothing is impossible with GOD. Many blessings to you and yours, IN THE MIGHTY NAME OF JESUS CHRIST OF NAZARETH. AMEN.
take care of yourself brother ❤
Great movie. I don't have many problems with dissociation but with nightmares. Lately, more than dissociation I feel some kind of detachment from people and situations I don't like and it doesn't bother me at all. Short periods that give me the time to check the situation I am in and the way to get out of there smoothly.
ASD Adhd ptsd & Sztp here. I’ve been like this so many times it’s almost frightening. Sometimes I thought I was approaching how I exist in society as how an actor goes about designing a character. I’ve also spent years and years in my own world. I’ve never really know what it’s like to just go thru life like whatever with people wanting you and including you, being rewarded for your talents, doing ‘normal’ things, having lots of dates/relationships/marriage etc, I’ve got no idea what being within those societal things/capitalist things is like. Sometimes I’ve even felt like I don’t exist. I’ve noticed the individual vs the location they are in for sure makes a difference. If I’m in a city where the energy is more my kinda place, I feel more like I’m a real person who is safe.
Just want you to know that you matter and are worthy, even if it feels like you don’t exist. Hope all is well with you
“And God’s peace, which is so great we cannot understand it, will keep your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.”
Philippians 4:7
I had a girlfriend who had a twin sister who tragically died unexpectedly. From that moment on, my girlfriend became her twin sister in every way. Facial expressions, mannerisms, values, behavior. It destroyed our relationship.
It happens to people who are not twins as well.
Huh...
@@Natty183 not sure what the huh was about. Exactly what I said.
@@pdizzle5302 It's fascinating, it left me speechless. I'm trying to imagine this happening and it's blowing my mind. It makes me stare off into space, wondering about the fundamentals of human functioning and I can't muster more than a huh... Currently...
I experienced it once when I found my mom dead unexpectedly mine lasted about a whole week where I thought she was still alive and I was having severe hallucinations of bugs bugs everywhere but I was acting ok I wasn’t freaking out but I’m told I kept talking about bugs being everywhere but also trying to call or text my mom while In the same house no matter how many times people told me she was gone I totally ignored them. Once it went away her passing hit me like a ton of bricks and still 10 months later flash backs of finding her and even the hallucinations I’ve been in such a horrible deep chronic depression. I miss my mom so much she was a single mom and I was her only child so she was all I had.
I just want to say thank you for sharing your story - I’m sorry to hear about your mom.
I'm so sorry for your loss and that her passing happened like that. It must have been horrible. 💔 Sending love! ❤️
My mom knocked my tooth out when I was a 14. My whole family witnessed it. She actually believes decades later that I broke my tooth by falling or some other benign reason. The whole family is shocked that she doesn't remember the event at all.
Wow that’s abuse
@@NutsNBerries h n
...
Sounds more like denial if she refuses to entertain any witness accounts 😒
@@tyler6320 either that or it is gaslighting
@@tyler6320 I agree. Denial or as someone else said, gaslighting. My mother loves denting things she's done. For her, it's gaslighting. I dumped her 9 years ago.
"Most clinicians have been taught (or assume) that DID is a rare disorder with a florid, dramatic...."
"DID and dissociative disorders are not rare conditions. In studies of the general population, a prevalence rate of DID of 1% to 3% of the population has been described (Johnson, Cohen, Kasen, & Brook, 2006; Murphy, 1994; Ross, 1991; ̧Sar, Akyüz, & Do ̆gan, 2007; Waller & Ross, 1997). "
"The difficulties in diagnosing DID result primarily from lack of education among clinicians about dissociation, dissociative
disorders, and the effects of psychological trauma, as well as from clini cian bias."
--Guidelines for Treating Dissociative Identity Disorder in Adults, Third Revision, INTERNATIONAL SOCIETY FOR THE STUDY OF TRAUMA AND DISSOCIATION
What about using instant gratification to numb uncomfortable feelings? Isn't addiction a dissociative response to stress, emotional pain, or trauma?
I’ve been dissociating my entire life. 60 years on this earth and I don’t remember much of the early years along with most of my 16 year marriage to a malignant narcissist. How confusing to go through most of my life not understanding what was happening with my body. It didn’t help that I was not allowed to have needs or emotions growing up or in my marriage. I have a fantastic therapist now and a safe place to heal. Been working on myself for 3 years. Even quit work due to focus on myself. I had 45 years of solid chaos from infancy to adulthood. Every kind of abuse, at least 2 attempts on my life that I remember so far. Domestic, sexual, emotional, physical abuse. Emotional, medical, physical neglect. So many loved ones lost that I couldn’t grieve. Moved 34 times along with several temporary stays with relatives. I am rhankful for videos like this and Books by Pete Walker and Bessel Van Der Kolk. Bless you both for your work.
I can relate but not that bad. I'm 42 now
Yup ! Amnesia dissonance is terrible ! Used to have it on a regular basis .. including where I lived and could not differentiate day and night dawn dusk . Now , after 4 yrs , I still go thru it but not as often . It is scary , it is exhausting and when you do come back , it is scarier
I really recommend Janina Fisher's work and books on this, she talks about how fragmentation / DID is not so rare and is difficult to diagnose - it's a coping mechanism that you learn to hide to be able to survive in a traumatic environment.
That DID is so rare is an old trope that is no longer bandied about so much anymore. Years ago people thought it was "rare" and "highly unlikely" etc. There seems to be this need to push people into the BPD slot away from DID. DID is not sensationalized "personalities", that is just one manifestation of the underlying trauma. It is not even the most important part. Just because there are tons of videos of people supposedly with DID "switching" on camera and some of them seemingly fake, has no bearing on DID's validity. Having to even discuss those (switching on camera) videos when trying to have a serious conversation about DID is just being forced to deal with a strawman argument that you didn't ask for. Misdiagnosing someone with DID as having BPD and then trying to treat them would be re-traumatizing and highly gaslighting for the individual.
Yes. I agree with you wholeheartedly. Thank you for sharing your insight and perspective about it Marcus. I know someone with DID. I have been knowing them for many years now, but we were not in contact with each other for quite sometime. Then on last year he was conversing with me, and mentioned the other personality name. He supposedly only have one alter personality. I don't know a whole lot about the disorder, but I immediately felt as though that is what he had when he mentioned this other person. I pray that the LORD heal and deliver and keep anyone that is going through this. In the mighty name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth. AMEN. I tol felt like it was unnecessary, uncalled for, and irrelevant for him to mention the videos that people have made on here in regards to the disorder, and mentioning that it is rare. It may make people second guess their diagnosis unnecessarily, and take them down a downward spiral. We must choose to be very careful and cautious about the things that we say and do when discussing certain subject matter, in Jesus name. 💙❤️💛💜🌹💖💗💕🤗
I just posted this above:
I am an LMHC. I work with clients with DID using Ego State Therapy, Internal Family Systems and Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing. I work in private practice. It is NOT as rare as this woman is making it sound. According to the DSM, it is up to 5 times more prevalent in the general population than Schizophrenia. In private practice, in the past 4 years, I have officially diagnosed more than a dozen clients with DID under consultation with an EMDR dissociative specialist, with whom I consult monthly. You DO need specialized training to work with these clients but sadly, more clinicians are working with DID clients and they don't realize it. Pretty much any client who is seen as "treatment resistant" or has a list of 5 or more diagnoses over the past 5+ years should be assessed for DID. The over-arching rule within DID systems is to "hide the system" often even from the person, who this woman refers to as the "host." Propagating the belief DID is rare leads to so many clients continuing to be diagnosed inaccurately, receiving ineffective treatment, resulting in hopelessness and often rejection from professionals frustrated with the lack of progress. Just like in medical medicine, if a treatment is not working, the doctors rethink the diagnosis and try another form of treatment. Sadly, in mental health, if the client does not improve, professionals blame the client for not trying hard enough or resisting treatment. Very likely, the clinician has the client misdiagnosed and thus is treating them as behavioral when in fact, they are dissociative. "Behavioral" implies they could simply change their behaviors given sufficient motivation and skills. "Dissociative" is outside the control of the individual and needs to be addressed very differently. Every dissociative part comes by their perspective, coping strategy, emotions, beliefs, honestly. They're not trying to frustrate clinicians. They simply will not shift their functioning until they are convinced it is safe to do so. #1 goal with dissociative clients is establishing safety in the now and connecting parts to this reality. So, I beg of the mental health community to get more training in dissociation. You are dealing with it whether you like it or not and not knowing what you are seeing is at very least delaying your clients' healing and potentially causing them harm.
Most current studies place the prevalence of dissociative identity disorder (DID) between 0.1% to 2%, though a few give estimations as high as 3-5%. The DSM-5-TR gives the 12-month prevalence of DID in a small community of American adults as 1.5%, and lifetime prevalence in a representative sample of Turkish women as 1.1% (American Psychiatric Association, 2022). As reviewed by Kate et al. (2019), other general population estimates obtained with dissociation-specific screening or diagnostic tools have ranged from 0.8% to 1.5%, with an additional 0.2% to 8.3% for other specified dissociative disorder (OSDD), which may or may not present as similar to DID. Dissociative disorders as a whole ranged from 3.0% to 18.3%.
Source did-research.org/did/basics/prevalence
@@melissabelding493 Perfectly written👍 Spot on about the not feeling safe yet so there is no change. I know exactly how this feels and have been there.
Myself got d.i.d. ddlg and abdl age regression my channel
My sister and I are both DID from childhood SA . She has 12 different alters and I have 3. Mine was misdiagnosed as Boarderline Personality till they started catching the slips of the alter, a mean male only came out when felt I was threatened. The other one a younger child female has only came out to my stepmother and a nurse in hospital. God Bless you all.💞🙏🌻
I was also misdiagnosed BPD and have thought for a while it may be DID because sometimes I'll be all alone, minding my business, and sense someone else "there" inside me. Plus, one time, I woke up because I heard arguing, and the moment I opened my eyes the arguing stopped. This is the first time I'm telling anyone because I'm afraid no one will believe me. One of the people was saying "I told you she couldn't handle it!" When I woke up. Has something like that ever happened with you? Maybe it was a co-incidence or maybe I have the "quiet" type.
@@cynacist1823 Yes You will have internal arguments with in your mind. For instance, When my Daughters asked to do something ,both my Now personality and Child would argue for the child in my mind... adult me no not good but child would be but it will be fun everybody is going.. that sort of thing.
I found the mean one came out a lot after drinking alcohol excessively. Have been sober since 2006. Only have trouble with him a few times now. I must Gard my thoughts as he blurts out things I think but don't want to say out loud... well he does!!! I don't go to see Phyco Dr bc of miss dx. I pray Daily for help that it stays away and put to rest.
I hope this can help you.
God Bless Much love 😍
@@Suz3q Omg this helps so much!!! They were arguing over a re-surfaced memory, and sometimes I hear one of them giving me instructions to stay safe and ask them for advice. She only comes out when something traumatic is/ is about to happen. The most recent time was when I was almost jumped by a hate group. One was saying "she can't handle it" and the other was saying "look how far she's come!". I also believe one alter may be a child of 2-3, the age I was when molested by a babysitter. She comes out when I feel overwhelmed. None of said alters have introduced themselves but sometimes we "co-inhabit" or I'll be "conscious" whilst "watching" what the other(s) is doing.
I've had that same experience of "guarding" my thoughts from the one who comes out during abuse. She's... A monster. But she's "my" monster, she only acts in self-defence but can be ruthless. She's always there, watching, and will very seldom "take control". She uses her powers for good. The few people who've met her unanimously agree she's "scary" and that I/we look like I might snap (she wouldn't).
How is your relationship with your alters? For the most part all 3-4 of us get along and typically "take turns". We'll only co-inhabit when our guard is down, each individually as well as, as a whole. "Unity" I call her, when that happens.
@@cynacist1823 No I do not have any relationship with with the Mean one as he doesn't like Me or the Original Me which is around six. Same as you when abuse started on younger brother,That is when Mean one took over bc he felt I was too weak and sickly to defend my litte brother. And he hates me and wants to hurt me. So I must Gard my thoughts when I am around People. He blurt out the most embarrassing things and I won't even know Till somebody tells me later. And I am ..I didn't say that. It was only after much inner surching and looking back at what had been said that I relised what was happening.
I have little memories before 12 years old as I was in defense mood which ment Mean one was forward alot. Six year old will stop me or lead me to toy sections of the stores ,I have to remind myself I have no children or grands to buy for but will still look.
Knowing you have this will help you in so many ways. I am hoping more people are understand that it isn't allways like they showed in the beginning of public knowledge of this. There are so many variables to this disorder. It is miss diagnosed more then people think. I had to figure it out on my own after 25 yrs of counseling and no progress. I have done better researching and trying to help myself. God Bless you.
I love the way medcircle talks about things like this. I feel seen and humanized.
Same I luv ! her as a yt pyche Dr.
My mom had DID. She had a terribly traumatic childhood and borderline diagnosis as an adult. Made for an interesting life.
Omg Dr Ramani, you just have explained how is that I have such a good memory and such a bad memory at the same time!!! We could say that I have a great memory, but full of dissociation gaps because of the CPTSD. This is an important point in my healing journey I haven't found an explanation for, untill now 😯
For me dissociation can be best described as reality becoming a videogame with a First Person perspective. When playing a game, I'm sitting in my chair and I'm completely separate from the player character on screen. I can still control their actions and make them do whatever I want. I can still see everything that they see. I'm aware of their surroundings and whatever is happening to them. Yet, I am not the character in the game. The character is in the middle of a fire fight. I am in my room, laying in a soft cozy bed, watching the person on screen fight for their life. If the character gets shot, or stabbed, or punched, or falls off a cliff, I don't feel it nor do I really emotionally respond to it. I can get up and walk away from the screen at any time, leaving the character to idle regardless of what kind of situation their in, and it doesn't affect me at all.
This is a good metaphor. Trying to think of how to explain mime and this is the closest example that sounds like what I experience.
After my house burned down and I lost 3 dogs we went to Walmart I felt dead and couldn't believe my whole life burned up .. then my dad died couple years later I was literally looking for him at the funeral bc I couldn't believe he died .. dissociation REALLY hard to explain
Me too! With the father one
I’m so sorry love 💜
Ddlg abdl age regression my channel
So sorry for your loss. May he rest in peace 🤍 I hope you are doing better now. God bless and He is there for you
What do u do if you live with that person and love them and they don't know what's wrong with them.. for an example they will get really mad their whole body changes and their eyes and they say the most hated things that they normally wouldn't never say . Then the next few hours or the next day they are normal, and always they get in this obsession with everything being clean extremely clean. It's breaking my heart. And they are under a lot of stress.
I don't drive by myself much because I forget where I'm going. I used to take my children with me so they could remind me where to go. Now my husband helps me a lot!
Thank you for taking the time for this video to educate others. I would like to say that I don't know that dissociative fugue is all that rare. I experienced it and have been in treatment for experiencing dissociative fugue episodes many years ago due to trauma. Respectfully, my concern is when clinicians say something is rare they have a tendency to ignore that it exists. Because of that, dismissive professional bias in the industry, it took way too long for me to be properly diagnosed and treated in a timely manner. Until then, my personal safety was in jeopardy as I navigated trauma by myself.
At 5:30 you mentioned dissociation can feel like intense fatigue, you described what narcolepsy feels like to me. And to my friends diagnosed with narcolepsy the triggers are stress and it causes an acute extreme tiredness and fading away dissociation. I think perhaps there needs to be further research into narcolepsy being on a dissociation spectrum. Even cateplexy melting to the floor feels like dissociation and sleep paralysis where you are viewing the body and aware but can’t talk or move
Oh boi. Thanks for raising this. I am going to the neuro sleep centre and I also have some other types PTSD symptoms. Man, I hope this is not just the body giving me more neuro symptoms!
Your statement has helped me, I used to think it was astro travel...lol
@@wheelchairgeek I don’t recommend any of the medications. Best thing you can do is ensure you can sleep and wake up without an alarm clock
Hi, I have mdd and cptsd. I have this issue I call a sleep attack but haven't gotten far to finding out why it happens other than when I feel an intense amount of fear. But I'm not a narcoleptic. What more can you say about it?
@@alanissophia332 in the past 24 hours I have been researching brain waves and talking to chat gbt. You know alpha delta gamma etc. I discovered there is a wearable headband EEG that monitors the brain waves. I would love to wear it 24/7 for a week and see if I’m abnormal during my waking hours. I think when I’m zoned out I’m in the wrong brain waves
Such an important topic and most sufferers are not even aware they are doing it. Thanks for spreading the message! ❤
💖🧘♀️
😭
Thanks for supporting mental health education 💙
I’ve experienced derealization for a while. It ranges from annoying, because it reduces my cognitive functioning, to scary, because everything feels unfamiliar and wrong. I definitely feel the sort of looking through a sheet of glass feeling, or as if everything is virtual reality. I’ve also experienced forgetting who I am for a while. It feels odd or wrong for some reason to remember that I am Sylvia. Frickin weird
I have dissociative amnesia. Have had a lifetime of trauma. There are so many parts of my life I can’t remember.
Same here. It's hard and really weird. Also tricky to have to explain to people. I'm sorry you're going through it 💗
I experienced depersonalization for a few years after I used this drug ONCE (I had a vision lifting up to the space and looking down at this world -then everything lost what little meaning they had left). I had to ask my friend in college to please convince me that we're here and that this is the reality. It was hard to snap out of it but you get the hang of it eventually. Now, 10 years later, it's totally gone though I miss it at times lol
the fear of this exact thing happening is why i was always too afraid to try drugs even once. A lot of people have dismissed me about this and say it cant happen but reading about medical cases of it just really stuck with me at a young age. Sorry that happened to you.
i hate that i miss the worst parts of my life
I have BPD (diagnosed by my psychiatrist, spotted by another licensed psychiatrist that did a psych exam on me for WLS, years prior) and have occasional dissociative episodes. I’ve only had dissociative fugue once, that I can recall. I remember the things leading up to it, know what triggered it and remember coming back to, confused and disoriented. The triggering incident that set everything in motion was finding out I had BPD, not just PTSD, anxiety and depression, like I’d thought, and losing all sense of hope that I’d be able to be cured or “fixed”. My thinking was, at least with PTSD, anxiety and depression, I can take pills to even out the chemical imbalances in my brain. With a personality disorder, there’s an actual physical change in the brain that can’t be undone. Then, I started looking up resources about BPD online. And that was a HUGE mistake, for someone just getting a diagnosis. What I was unaware of, was most resources online are for the victims of more hurtful, aggressive and harmful BPD people (which I’m not). So, I got to see all that vitriol and hate, for something I had no control over developing, while in a highly emotional, already stressed state. The next thing I remembered was it getting dark outside, me being on the ground and someone looking at me, confused. It was like I was controlling a mech suit that was my body or something… like I was inside myself, and I was a house, looking out thru the “windows” of my eyes. The consciousness aspect of it was weird, too. I was aware enough of things around me to not run into *most* things. I accidentally bumped into someone and/or tripped over a root, it seems like, and that’s what snapped me out of it. Maybe all of that was depersonalization. I don’t know, but it was strange… I was confused about where all of the day had gone. I don’t recall exactly when I was reading about BPD, but I know it was still very much light out, at that time. It took me a second to register where I was, I was disoriented, had left my phone at home, and I just started breaking down in a public park, crying, wondering how I’d gotten there, overwhelmed by everything going on, all the “noise” in my brain. Luckily (maybe unluckily), I’d driven my car there and parked where I usually did. Forgot to take my keys out of the ignition, after turning the car off, or lock the door, so I’m glad no one noticed. If this is what dementia is like, I feel for them, because it was absolutely horrifying…
I had the exact same experience as you. Being diagnosed BPD was when I gave up hope of being "cured". And like you said, looking up personality disorders was a mistake. My fugue state was two weeks and I remember coming to in my shared room thinking "who am I? Where am I? How did I get here?" luckily I was in my room so all my assignments were there so I got my name and skimming the questions "snapped" me back to "me". When I went to my next class, my classmates asked if I'd been okay cause I had been "acting weirdly". Apparently, I had been attending classes those two weeks! And 100% if dissociating is anything like dementia, I hope the people around me love me enough to treat me as an equal, and make me feel like a queen.
I was being sexually harassed by a supervisor in my workplace and was experiencing panic attacks regularly when getting ready and driving to work and was feeling dissociated, as to having an out of body experience. Thank you for explaining this and confirming it’s a normal reaction. 🙏🏻
i've experienced dissociative fugue twice and can quite honestly say it's terrifying, and so confusing, not knowing who you are, where you are, or how you got to where you are. These happened about 8 years ago for me, and to this day, i have zero memory of those missing hours - there's just nothing there at all. Thankfully i stayed fairly local, but both times ended up in the middle of a wood! I was told at the time it is extremely rare, and although no episodes since then, it does terrify me that it will happen again.
Curiously, i found out only a couple of years ago when i got hold of a copy of my medical records, that the first psychotherapist i had 10 years ago, wrote in my records that he felt i was "at serious risk of having a dissociative fugue episode", and then he fought for better support for me. Sadly here in the UK, our NHS has a serious lack of trauma understanding.
i have been diagnosed with complex ptsd, and lived through over 50 years of significant trauma from multiple abusers. I have also been diagnosed with depersonalisation disorder (separate from self), and also one not mentioned here - derealisation disorder (separate from the world). Though not diagnosed, i can absolutely relate to dissociative amnesia.
I have had a few dissociative episodes in my life. Once was when I got a break-up letter from the one I was madly in love with. I remember the pain was so unbelievable deep that I dropped to my knees crying but in a quick moment, I could see myself above the ceiling watching my physical body twist in pain. While up there, I was engulfed in incredible peace and joy; the higher I went, the more joy I experienced until my physical body could no longer withstand the joy. Then I came back to my reality of pain. On another occasion, I was driving down a snowy mountain road when I realized there was a sharp curve ahead and I did not have the time to slow down safely. I knew that if I slammed the breaks, I would lose control of the car so there was no way out. I was headed into the abyss and I did not want to see so I closed my eyes. The second I did, I was overcome by an incredible feeling of peace; seconds later, I opened my eyes and I was safely on the other side of that mountain. At that time reality kicked in and I felt sheer terror thinking of what might have happened. Somehow I made it. I had a couple of other episodes like that. I didn't know this was a disorder. I always thought these were spiritual experiences. Wow!
I feel very lucky to come out of a dissociative/derealized state that i was in for a few years straight. I thought that, as a child, it would last forever but it ended on its own eventually. I feel incredibly lucky to have healed enough to experience life again.
Any tips?
I’ve disassociated so much that I forget everything about myself, including my name, family members, age, personality, & my appearance. It can last for months. But now I have grounding methods & I can mostly turn it on & off at will. I have Schizotypal Personality Disorder & every schizo I know disassociates
DID is incredibly complex and still very mysterious. I feel Dr. Ramani makes a lot of rigid assumptions of how it presents and how it is experienced. it is unique to every individual who has it and it needs to be understood that there are a lot of variations and gradations. and sorry--- in my opinion it is not as rare as they make it out to be. think about it: the rate of child abuse and childhood sexual abuse alone. (childhood: when a person will develop DID as a response to complex trauma). not that every victim will develop DID, but the term "rare" does a huge disservice to those trying to be taken seriously by medical and psychology professionals, and other relationships. What does "rare" mean here? the numbers i've seen for DID is 1 to 3 percent. bipolar disorder is around 1.5%. ginger haired people is about 2%. so what is rare? and if you look into it, you will see a growing association of it with autism as well. AND its very nature is to remain hidden. 96% of those with DID are covert--meaning it is not the obvious sort seen on TH-cam and in movies.
I just posted this above:
I am an LMHC. I work with clients with DID using Ego State Therapy, Internal Family Systems and Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing. I work in private practice. It is NOT as rare as this woman is making it sound. According to the DSM, it is up to 5 times more prevalent in the general population than Schizophrenia. In private practice, in the past 4 years, I have officially diagnosed more than a dozen clients with DID under consultation with an EMDR dissociative specialist, with whom I consult monthly. You DO need specialized training to work with these clients but sadly, more clinicians are working with DID clients and they don't realize it. Pretty much any client who is seen as "treatment resistant" or has a list of 5 or more diagnoses over the past 5+ years should be assessed for DID. The over-arching rule within DID systems is to "hide the system" often even from the person, who this woman refers to as the "host." Propagating the belief DID is rare leads to so many clients continuing to be diagnosed inaccurately, receiving ineffective treatment, resulting in hopelessness and often rejection from professionals frustrated with the lack of progress. Just like in medical medicine, if a treatment is not working, the doctors rethink the diagnosis and try another form of treatment. Sadly, in mental health, if the client does not improve, professionals blame the client for not trying hard enough or resisting treatment. Very likely, the clinician has the client misdiagnosed and thus is treating them as behavioral when in fact, they are dissociative. "Behavioral" implies they could simply change their behaviors given sufficient motivation and skills. "Dissociative" is outside the control of the individual and needs to be addressed very differently. Every dissociative part comes by their perspective, coping strategy, emotions, beliefs, honestly. They're not trying to frustrate clinicians. They simply will not shift their functioning until they are convinced it is safe to do so. #1 goal with dissociative clients is establishing safety in the now and connecting parts to this reality. So, I beg of the mental health community to get more training in dissociation. You are dealing with it whether you like it or not and not knowing what you are seeing is at very least delaying your clients' healing and potentially causing them harm.
Came here to say pretty much all this
I am a ginger and though its a 2% population there's plenty of us out here!
They should stop saying DID is rare. The medical establishment has long gaslighted people suffering from DID. It needs to stop. They are often treated as imposters, so unfair.
I know, when you call a condition rare all you’re doing is giving people permission to deny anything is wrong with you. “Stop being so dramatic.”
Thank you for your humility. More professionals need this level of transparency to admit they are not qualified to talk about this specialty.
I feel I’ve experienced this. Narcissistic mother, father was the enabler who believed every lie she told him about me. I, was the scapegoat. Lots of sadness sorrow, trauma. Sexual abuse from boys outside the home. One other main part of my “trauma”, is the discrimination I felt from my mother. It exists within the African American community. Mother is brown, born raised in the south and I’m sure experienced it herself as she grew up. I’m sure she resents me, because I have a fair complexion & curly hair….so, I am “high yella with good hair”. Something that in times past, made one favored and accepted. I know now how she made her disdain for “us” known from my father-who I resemble. He’s shared stories of conversations they had. My entire childhood, I wondered why she married him. Learning about narcissistic mothers, I understand he was her “original” source of supply. He’s a hard worker and was by his own words, “gullible & easily manipulated”. I guess she took her chances…married him….had babies…only 1 was “light” and she decided I’d be the one she would treat like a piece of 💩. This video, like most of what Dr Ramanl has posted have allowed me to learn, grow, thrive. It wasn’t me…it was her!!!! The dissociation began when I was (I believe) in high school. There’d been sexual assaults, physical abuse by my father, mother telling him lies about me almost daily so there was always something to discipline me for. And she’d pushed her household responsibilities off onto me beginning at 8-9 years of age. I was ironing, doing dishes, and as I got older, cooking, doing laundry for family of 7. Also primary care taker for baby sister who, was killed at age 7 after being hit by a car….I was 16 at the time. I think I grieved more than my mother. It’s been rough, but I’m here. Went no contact age 19-best decision. The mild dissociation will probably be with me until I’m laid out in front of the church. As I soar and build a new social circle, I’m replacing old trauma filled memories with new ones 😌😀😊…and it’s good!! Thank you Dr Ramani for your work. It’s such a tremendous help. The validation is priceless.
Hi 👋 how are you doing?
I just read your post, I literally thought someone copied & pasted part of my life. This was me! My family as well. I am white though, looks like my father, but did not have care taker. Babysitters yes at night when they went out, growing up , but I was the one taking care of my siblings & household chores. I was cooking at nine. But was always told it was because I loved to cook. I did, but I also was trying to “make” my family like me. Especially my mother. You are so lucky that you realized this at such a young age. I lived an entire 50 years dedicated to supplying my family’s needs until they all no longer “needed” me, when I started to speak up. I was discarded by parents, 3 siblings & all my nieces & nephew. Now my son. It’s a trickling down effect & leaves one feeling mentally tortured. I have felt so alone & really have had no self worth. I’m trying my hardest to forgive so that I can move on. It’s the hardest thing I think I ever can do. I wish you happiness & hope you realize you are not alone in what happened to you. Evil lurks in families. God finally separated me by showing me clarity.
@@Michelle_9_27
Hello there. Find you. Find out who you are. Your authentic self and be your own good parent. It may take time but once you find Michelle you should spend time feeding her. Her heart mind soul. Any creativity should be massaged and loved because it will express who you are. Yes God separated you, so He can begin the healing process. Embrace that!! He knows who you are supposed to become, because He chose you to be His. Take care of yourself my dear. Love on Michelle the most. She’s worth it!!! Thank you for your words of validation. Painful as our experiences have been, we survived and are here. Let’s prove all those people who have been so horrible to us wrong 😊😀😁. Let’s learn, grow & thrive.
@@Godwinpounds4333
Doing good. Still have my ups and downs but I’m good. How are you?
@@sharonjones7138 thank Sharon. Thank you for your validation as well. And I’m actually pretty creative. Been praying hard for God to show me His will. I need to work. I’m so lost, & literally don’t know what direction to take. He will show me.
Moderate to severe Dissociation has been my default mental state for about 25 years. I can trace it to happening from drug use, in particular methamphetamines. I used to get a severe panic attack everyday at the same time 7 pm. Many days it’s like waking up in a different mind everyday. It has slowly diminished everyday, but still exists and I still get reality shifts at any given moment. Anyone who lived this would have offed themselves along time ago. The only thing that seems to help me are conscious breathing and eating a diet high in protein. It is quite odd to catch glimpses of my old mind after so many years living this crazy nightmare. It is clear I suffered permanent damage in my brain at that point of drug use.
I call them "Blackouts". One time I was triggered by a bus-stop and "woke-up" at home two weeks later. I had been attending courses and doing assignments - based on the graded homework - and to this day have zero memory of those two weeks. I only know it was two weeks from the dates on the assignments. Wild.
Thank you for sharing this information freely for others to learn from. As an individual diagnosed with CPTSD and BPD, your lectures are so heartwarming to learn from even after a decade of various professional therapies. CBT and EMDR have both been extremely helpful.
Dr.Ramani had me at "Intra-psychic protective mechanisim". She is the BEST!What I would give to have her as a therapist/psychologist.
I really appreciate this channel. It's been incredibly helpful.
Through a gauze (or a screen) EXACTLY describes how it is for me. Like in in my body but I'm far away from everything that's happening. Happens most often when I'm in group social settings or driving
Many years ago, I had panic attacks during which I benefitted from a person simply sitting with me. Each attack lasted only a few minutes. Ever since that period, I have not experienced attacks anymore. I will always be grateful for each person who sat with me.
hey, good video but there's one point i have to bring up- many others in the comments have already said this but i'd like to add my perspective as well.
the idea that did is very rare and that those online that have it might be faking it is irresponsible misinformation to be spreading. it can lead to people being harassed online, or not getting evaluated for it when they should. not to mention that whether or not someone is "faking," they have something going on, likely as a result of trauma, and should be treated with openness and compassion. accusing people of faking can only cause harm. also, if someone is spreading misinformation about a disorder that they say they have, call them out on the misinformation rather than attacking them for making things up.
did is about as common as people having red hair, and painting it as an incredibly rare thing that many might be faking is harmful.
This this thisthis all of this thank you
I just found this site. Thank you for validating my life. I was diagnosed with DID. No one believed me or my Dr. I suffered many traumatic events in my life that I don't remember. I was told that I acted and assumed a different personality. Different names are dressed differently. I ended up in the hospital for months. I still have it. But it is getting better. I still can't remember so much in my life. I don't think I want to.
Thanks!
There are so many true crime documentaries that I’ve watched where the people described might just be going through dissociation. This changes everything.
I love this channel and both of y’all. However, I want to strongly caution against overestimating how rare DID is. It took decades of missed diagnoses before I finally got my DID diagnosis at age 47. Kyle, I do believe most all of those people on TH-cam have DID. And there are so many more. Some people estimate an incidence of as much as 1% of the population. I can say that in the four years since my diagnosis, I’ve met two to three other people who I am pretty sure have DID. And I live in the middle of rural Nowhere Land. It’s the subtle signs: they tell you something, but then appear to have no knowledge of that fact at other times. You have to explain the same basic thing over and over and over (because you’re telling different parts). Blank stares when you say “We just talked about this the other day.”
It’s easy in our overworked society to blame those blank stares and inconsistent knowledge bases on something else. But the truth is much more sinister. Very young children are subjected to unspeakable trauma way too often. It doesn’t just go away.
Also, I have another very practical objection to the “DID is vanishingly rare” narrative. When my college age and older personalities would come out of dormancy, and my counselor would tell them that the reason the year is 2022 is because they are part of a DID system, they would argue with him and throw that fact in his face. We were a psychology major at an Ivy League school, and so we got very superior with him a number of times as different ones woke up. “DID is so rare, it hardly ever happens! It’s not worth considering! What are you hiding?? What’s REALLY going on here????”
It’s funny in retrospect. But the rarity of DID is what I now consider a dangerous narrative.
In short, DID is not rare, because psychopaths are not rare. Satanists are not rare. Other organized crime is not rare. The dark underbelly of this society is much more extensive than people would like to believe.
I believe the "DID is rare" narrative is a protective denial. If DID were prevalent, it would be undeniable how cruel and even evil a species we can be. Beings wearing a cloak of civilization. Therefore, DID MUST be rare and/or discredited.
Unfortunately, the covert aspects of this state of being play right into that narrative. Like she said about crimes going unpunished due to traumatic amnesia, "if you don't remember it, then it can't have happened". The medical community's attitude towards DID sufferers who are better able to slide by in the real world.
100% ppl dont understand how messed up and confusedthe world is. Most ppl dont know themselves and most people you dont actually know. Becoming more aware in psychology reallyyyy opens up your eyes to the mental illness that walks heavily among us all.
It's rare when compared to other type of potential diagnoses. I imagine that there is just a degree of caution here because treating someone with DID is very different from treating them for BPD (and dissociation stemming from that), for instance. I get that it can be kind of ignorant to be dismissive of those that claim to have it on TH-cam. However, those who post about it are using a social media tool to communicate information on the disorder to the world. As such, they carry a great deal of responsibility. If they spread misinformation, viewers without DID will get the wrong idea and it will ultimately only hurt progress when it comes to treatment and societal acceptance. Once you put up a video on something, it's up to the viewers to interpret it in anyway they see fit. Without a proper consideration of consequences, intentions, social implication, and etc, you can end up doing more harm than good. Of course, there is also the other extreme end of being too dismissive, which results in lack of diagnosis. That's why there should be a happy medium.
@@dumbdonny4824 Agreed.
@@josj1912 My main point is that I have seen countless therapists, psychologists, and psychiatrists as I have moved all over this country. Inpatient, outpatient, day hospital, group therapy, individual therapy - every possible setting. And it took over twenty years of that to get a diagnosis. And that diagnosis was initially suspected by me. I took it to a counselor in 2019. She told me I was probably wrong because it is so rare. But she was the one to eventually give me the diagnosis.
But again, it’s inexcusable that the level of clinical suspicion for this is almost zero. Because what follows as a result is a lack of education on how DID presents. Then DID doesn’t get spotted when it shows up.
I have the utmost confidence in Dr Ramani. But I think more of us with DID need to speak up in comments like this one and say “I’m here. I’m real.” Because to say something is “very, very rare” makes people like Kyle say that all the people who make videos about this on YT can’t all have it, can they?
Just to be clear, what makes Kyle a great interviewer is that he says out loud what we are all thinking. I’ve heard MANY people say that these TH-camrs can’t possibly all have DID. I’ve heard therapists say that in videos - that these people who say they have DID are just wanting likes because of the sensationalism of a switch caught on camera. And that can be true (I’m specifically thinking of Trisha Peytas). But most of the time, it’s not.
There have been many trends where mental illness is part of it. Like goth and emo tend to carry a certain depressed and/or anxious persona. But the truth of the matter is that many of us actually do have major clinical depression. The fact that we have a crew of emo people we roll with does not mean we aren’t depressed.
I don’t know if I’m making a clear analogy.
Anyway, my main goal is to raise awareness. At present, clinicians are not in that good place of having adequate clinical suspicion while being competently trained to make a differential diagnosis. So many therapists saw extensive evidence of it in me and didn’t know what they were looking at. They got mad at me for not making more progress in therapy. They gaslighted me and said I was being willful about not growing. When really they did not have any idea they were dealing with over 100 different personalities. That’s not okay. I wanted very badly to never seek therapy again, but I was convinced to try one more time. But at this point, therapists who deal with systems like mine say most therapists do more harm than good. And they are right about that. We need to do better as a mental health system.
Dr. Ramini, have you ever heard of dissociation being linked to headaches or migraines? For a couple months all of a sudden I was getting headaches several days a week, either preceded by, occuring with or followed by dissociation. I felt totally detached like I was an observer watching myself go through my day, talking to people, but not really present in that person. I completely understand the description of looking at life through a window. Everything felt far away. If I didn't try very hard to focus on following what I was doing I would notice that I even spaced out *as the observer*, meaning I'd only have a foggy idea about what just happened or what I just said.
I was a little hopeless/stagnant-feeling at work and in my life but I wasn't experiencing any traumas at the time. I suspect with me it may be neurologic in nature as it's connected with the timing of headaches, like a form of migraine aura. I wonder if that might be the case for others who experience dissociation too.
I did have an experience of dissociation one time for about 2 minutes at age 16, after I had moved to a new country and felt quite disoriented and unfamiliar with my surroundings and people so you could say that was a trauma of sorts but nothing compared to abuse survivors who are usually what you would see in a person who dissociates.
I get a lot of depersonalization / derealization with migraines. The aura effects, pain, and other visual disturbances makes me feel like I'm viewing my world in the third-person.
I suffer from chronic dissociative amnesia. Sometimes I forget entire parts of my life that had nothing to do with the trauma I went through. I wanted to ask the public whether this happens to anyone else.
There's a lot of my childhood I don't remember. There's a lot I can't remember during my teen years. I usually only remember the bad.. within the last 3 years I started remembering and realizing the very worst of my experiences which put me in a very numbing and disbelief state. Sometimes I can't even remember what happened a month ago or 5 months ago.
Yes it does. I can relate.
This has happened to me 3 times at work I have bipolar 2 I wos fine it was nothing to do with trauma I had no idea lost hours didn't know till next day a boss told me I was acting strange I couldn't remember a thing
This happens to me-and things, I’ve come to realize, that do not seem to associate with the trauma might actually hit on a sensory perception that triggers the traumatic memory. I could be completely fine and then a scent or a sound might trigger me and I go into a dissociative episode and it isn’t until much later that I figure out what caused it. Our brains work hard to protect us and it’s definitely scary because sometimes, my body is remembering something my brain does not.
12:00 THANK YOU KYLE!!! so, that said: I am a properly, twice diagnosed DID system. And I can assure you: we ( I refer to myself as I or the system, so with "we" I mean people with a DID condition) are lots and loads more than you would think, because: a) nobody of us ever had A CLUE that not being alone in your head is something not normal - because of the fact that you "need" to be that young to experience trauma to develop DID it is like " has always been the way that I was talking to another person /s in my head / had balnks spaces / found something I obviously wrote but couldn't remember / found something I obviously wrote but wan't my handwriting / was greeted by persons I never saw"- it is sort of normal for us". 2.) DID is funny, because it brings amnesia with it, which means: you can walk around for years and decades not realizing what the problem is, wondering why some people are utterly upset with you although you never met them and so an. AND: DID is funny, part 2: your head will fill in the blankets- which leads me to 3.) DID is funny, because: it comes with an amnesia for the amnesia. Until you realize, that there is something really " off" it might take years and years and years and - this is my main argument: 4.) in the meantime DID does what it is supposed to do: it helps you functioning. So I met a few systems, diagnosed with DID from the same University I was diagnosed at, all of us were: successful, in a stable relationship and sort of ok-ish with " sorry, no clue what happened in the first 15 years of my life". This is why our brain split up. It slpit up to make sure that at least one part would be able to live a normal life. This is why lots of us won't get diagnosed, because: we are - on the total opposite to those extreme "switches" shown on youtube (how on earth does that work?) super subtle and won't jump into your face with switches, different accents, aso. That said, according to Michaela Huber there is asubtype of DID with very outgoing switches and extreme different alters, but most of us seem to be hyper-atapted-to-normal-live-expectations. So we won't be diagnosed randomly, too. Only when the world shatters or an alter causes huge problems. But most of us are hyper functional. That said, there are surely too many suffering in a way that they won't be able to live a normal life and being a high functionally system isn't funny, too.
Depersonalization is the big one I experience. I noticed in high stress situations where I feel a high loss of control/anonymity/free will the faster it happens and the more often I experience those stress episodes the more it happens outside of those instances as well. The less I experience those types of stressors, the less it happens. I am diagnosed with ADHD,BPD,OCD, panic and anxiety disorders and c-ptsd.
My wife suffered from anxiety and thinks constantly that my parents are against her or plotting against her or always trying to undermine her authority. The other day she thought that my dad (71yrs old with recent knee surgery) was trying to push her and my three yr old son out of the way with his walker . She says he said excuse me and wouldn’t stop and her or my son could have been hurt and she thinks he was trying to be malicious. I love her but this is getting old and she refuses to go to therapy and doesn’t even want to take ashwaganda with me thinking I’m just trying to get her to take pills to make her emotionless. I take it because it does assist with the stress she brings but I know this can’t continue forever .
Dissociative fugue can co-occur with Dissociative Identity Disorder where the alternate personality "fronts" in the brain, takes over the body and travels.
DID's switch alters often at the willful domination of the alter outside any stress.
Spacing out into short periods of unconsciousness is a simple dissociation.
Out-of-body momentary episodes may occur with the dissociatively amnesic, it is uncommon but very real. One may recall momentary "go-look-sees" where it can be proven the person did leave the body to the brain, and saw what it is not possible for them to have seen, in another room or at a visual perspective unattainable by the person.
Edit: computer forced misspelling
Can Dissociative fugue make you act like a different person? I had an episode with no history of mental illness and nothing like this has happened before or sense. For a month I was acting like a different person and going to places/doing things i had no awareness of. I didn’t go missing though and I didn’t change my name or anything like that. But it’s as if I woke up and I realized what I had done mostly because of evidence and remembering bits and pieces. Could this have been a fugue episode?
@@danni9756 hello 💚
I can only relate, that reads just like fugue --- one possibly caused by a stressor or unknown life trigger.
Mention of being like a different person, still a little aware, to my lay experiences seems more like a brain-enforced relief of something by a fugue than dissociative identity disorder... yet there are normal people unknowingly having DID.
If you are not receiving a professional answer, I suggest you ask this question again clearly to beautiful 💞 person I know, Melissa a cptsd and DIDer, in a comment on the most recent of her videos on "The Bag System." She is more familiar with dissociations than myself.
I hope and pray you find the 💖 answers you need !
@@thexpax Thank you so much for your answer! I honestly don’t know if it would be considered a fugue because when I research fugue people go missing, forget their names etc but nothing like that happened to me. It was more like I couldn’t think about the places i was going, the people i was meeting, and I can’t place myself there. I only remember and I don’t know why i did the things that i did or went the places that i went. I was also doing risky things out of my character and that i had no knowledge of. I know it was brought on by extreme stress for over a year and as for DID I’ve never had any signs that i might have alters. I will definitely get her opinion and thank you so much.
@@danni9756 please do not mention me
her and I just had a falling out after so many years
I made a comment in dissociation I do not really recall
but what I can were a couple of points in my right mind I would never subject her to
it was all my fault
I randomly found this video and I'm so glad I did. I was admitted into a hospital for psychological issues in December.. December 6th I remember it very clearly because my birthday was the next day. I was acting insane. I saw things people that weren't there. It got so bad I called the cops on myself because I thought I was surrounded by police that weren't responding to me verbally. I was begging them to put their guns down pleading for what felt like hours in a parking lot at a Walmart. I stayed until they closed at midnight and we'll beyond. I was asked by the police the real ones, what month it was after just telling them my birthday was the next day. I was unable to remember what month it was. I genuinely had no idea. They officer said well if tomorrow is your birthday.. and your birthday is December 7th... Wouldnt it be December?
I was so scared when he said that compounded with the intense hallucinations I'd just gone through. Anyway he was clearly worried for me also and drove me to a hospital. It was supposed to be a program that lasted 3 days. I was in for 31. I remember the day I went vividly. But then it's all dark for almost 20 days. I woke up and my memory has been the same since. I remember January And February of 2023 but the next memory I have is December 6th. The rest is GONE. I don't even have slivers of memories here and there I mean it's all gone and I don't know why
My wife cannot recall most of her childhood before age 8. She surely has PTSD elements, depression, etc. The siblings say nothing happened to her directly, but was frequent witness to physical abuse her brothers suffered. One brother in particular seemed to get the worse of it.
...You're supposed to be able to recall your childhood before age 8?
I...did not know that