Yes the perception of external pressure, demands, or expectations is an activator for me as well as the perception that someone is judging me as bad that is also an activator for me
THANK YOU, you have helped me with more with this one video, than any other person or podcast has ever helped me. I can now see that I'm not the 'Evil Demon' that I have always seen myself as. You are making a massive difference to my life, thank you for doing what you're doing. XXX
I can really relate to what some of you were sharing about puberty. I did not want to grow up! And once my body started changing, it was very jarring. At the time, I thought I was alone in that experience, because it seemed like most of my peers were excited about growing up. But I think it’s actually fairly common for adolescents to struggle with all those changes, and maybe even to want to remain a child.
listening to this is taking me on little trips all thru my life and seeing where i have had similar things happen it scares me a bit because i must be in a real one right now because i gambled last night and i been sober 14 years i didnt lose much money and i have stopped but its huge sign i am way in a thing , so i will just cry and rest and do my best to care for me. thanks again for this 🥰
I've watched SO many of these videos, and Xannie - your experience is SO similar to mine...I'll be 42 next month and I JUST found out I've had this - probably most of my life. I was diagnosed with ADHD when I was 5, but it never explained all of my behavior issues. Although, until the last few years, I didn't know I had behavior issues. I really thought I was just crazy... This all has made SO much of my life make sense now. And of course, now I'm angry about it...but also, kind of relieved. Not crazy...but similar lol - and definitely manageable. The one thing I seem to be struggling with is that trying to explain BPD to someone who doesn't experience emotional dysregulation or rejection sensitivity, or identity disturbances, or favorite person...and THAT makes me feel like I'm never really going to be understood. But I know it's just going to take time. These videos have been SUPER helpful.
“First of all, I’m so glad these videos are helpful! Second, one of the ways that I have found is useful to describe emotional dysregulation by comparing it to what I’ve termed an ‘amygdala hijack’. Most people have had an experience where they got really caught off guard emotionally, I think sometimes getting cut off in traffic or dealing with a random angry stranger is a good example of this. Often times, people in this situation just react out of instinct, and then it’s not until later that they realize… ‘oh, I should’ve said ____ instead’ or ‘I should have done ____.’ Most people can relate to that so I’d tell them that for me, it just happens a lot more often, and that a lot of the automatic reactions I have to those kinds of situations are pretty maladaptive. That usually usually works to help people at least understand what I’m talking about” ~Xannie
18:32 oh god, don't get me started on how much I hate the feeling of seams rubbing my skin 😫 why is it the norm for the extra fabric part of seams to be on the INSIDE of clothing?!! 😵💫
I just wanna say I appreciate you guys doing these videos. It helps me understand my BPD so much better. I love that you guys cover any and all topics of BPD. I feel crazzzzzzzzy like my world is coming to an end - even when I know Im making progress in my life and my life is less of a shitshow than it has been in the past, I still feel overwhelmed like I could be doing things better but then I just procrastinate everything because it becomes too much. Its an every day battle I literally have to just laugh at my life and just keep swimming LOL
After therapy and serious work on myself, i would no longer meet the criteria for diagnosis. I am not cured but I don't react the same as I used to and I'm learning to ride the waves better.
It's interesting about the comorbidities with BPD. I think a lot of mental health problems are overlapping. I was diagnosed with ADHD and I think that I might be my mildly autistic. I have problems regulating intense anger... But I don't often suffer from depression or feelings of emptiness or self-harm etc. but I still plan on asking my psychiatrist to assess me for BPD just to check. I just had a really bad trigger and disregulation episode brought on by intents feelings of betrayal and distrust. I do identify with some of the shorts I've seen about regulating yourself by not saying extremely cutting things to someone and rather just having them be dead to you. Anyone that can get you to bring out the so called daggers might not be worth your time.
Straight to the point of Xannie.. same here everytime I being nasty, gaslighting or verbally bullying (no cursing) my bf, even he said he'll always be here or offer love and kiss i know in their heart prbably not gonna stay.
With my bpd turning into quiet bpd now it feels like purgatory like if time isn’t moving, the world is not changing im stuck in a void of meaningless existence and an intense desire to leave this reality in hopes of another that will be separated from the average human experience. Bare in mind I have a great life and when I’m at work I am completely fulfilled and happy it’s hours outside of work or in the morning when I’m not busy where I get frustrated with the mundaness of existence that suicidal ideation begins to kick in
Clinically, major depression is considered an episodic disorder (it’s a mood disorder, which are currently all episodic). So, you experience episodes of major depression. Having co-occurring BPD might mean you experience some other BPD symptoms during a depressive episode, but those symptoms are still not considered to be episodic (from a clinical perspective).
It can vary a lot! They tend to be relatively short lived, like a few hours. But some situations can activate longer episodes - it really depends on the context and the individual
It's amazing. Mother and two sisters in law all exhibit symptoms (since I am not a MD). Do people tend to marry BPDs if raised by one? That is my theory.
I felt bad deep inside but I don't have the face to apologize or soft down, i could only keep one intention which is wayward and uncontrollable tantrum...
'if I wasn't intensely engaging with the world it was like I didn't exist'. This sums up so much for me.. thank you✨
Not getting enough sleep activates me big time. Interpersonal, feeling like I’m being neglected activates me.
Yes the perception of external pressure, demands, or expectations is an activator for me as well as the perception that someone is judging me as bad that is also an activator for me
THANK YOU, you have helped me with more with this one video, than any other person or podcast has ever helped me. I can now see that I'm not the 'Evil Demon' that I have always seen myself as.
You are making a massive difference to my life, thank you for doing what you're doing. XXX
This was super helpful thank you! I am going to also remember “we can do hard things “ in all the tenses ❤
I can really relate to what some of you were sharing about puberty. I did not want to grow up! And once my body started changing, it was very jarring. At the time, I thought I was alone in that experience, because it seemed like most of my peers were excited about growing up. But I think it’s actually fairly common for adolescents to struggle with all those changes, and maybe even to want to remain a child.
listening to this is taking me on little trips all thru my life and seeing where i have had similar things happen it scares me a bit because i must be in a real one right now because i gambled last night and i been sober 14 years i didnt lose much money and i have stopped but its huge sign i am way in a thing , so i will just cry and rest and do my best to care for me.
thanks again for this 🥰
❤❤
Thank u your videos bring in alot of awareness which then brings in acceptance. Thank you
You are so welcome!
I've watched SO many of these videos, and Xannie - your experience is SO similar to mine...I'll be 42 next month and I JUST found out I've had this - probably most of my life. I was diagnosed with ADHD when I was 5, but it never explained all of my behavior issues. Although, until the last few years, I didn't know I had behavior issues. I really thought I was just crazy... This all has made SO much of my life make sense now. And of course, now I'm angry about it...but also, kind of relieved. Not crazy...but similar lol - and definitely manageable.
The one thing I seem to be struggling with is that trying to explain BPD to someone who doesn't experience emotional dysregulation or rejection sensitivity, or identity disturbances, or favorite person...and THAT makes me feel like I'm never really going to be understood. But I know it's just going to take time. These videos have been SUPER helpful.
“First of all, I’m so glad these videos are helpful!
Second, one of the ways that I have found is useful to describe emotional dysregulation by comparing it to what I’ve termed an ‘amygdala hijack’. Most people have had an experience where they got really caught off guard emotionally, I think sometimes getting cut off in traffic or dealing with a random angry stranger is a good example of this. Often times, people in this situation just react out of instinct, and then it’s not until later that they realize… ‘oh, I should’ve said ____ instead’ or ‘I should have done ____.’
Most people can relate to that so I’d tell them that for me, it just happens a lot more often, and that a lot of the automatic reactions I have to those kinds of situations are pretty maladaptive. That usually usually works to help people at least understand what I’m talking about” ~Xannie
@@thebpdbunch Thank you 🙏🏼💖
❤
18:32 oh god, don't get me started on how much I hate the feeling of seams rubbing my skin 😫 why is it the norm for the extra fabric part of seams to be on the INSIDE of clothing?!! 😵💫
I just wanna say I appreciate you guys doing these videos. It helps me understand my BPD so much better. I love that you guys cover any and all topics of BPD. I feel crazzzzzzzzy like my world is coming to an end - even when I know Im making progress in my life and my life is less of a shitshow than it has been in the past, I still feel overwhelmed like I could be doing things better but then I just procrastinate everything because it becomes too much. Its an every day battle I literally have to just laugh at my life and just keep swimming LOL
I could definitely see myself on a podcast like this - I see the therapy in it and I admire you guys!! So happy I came across this channel
After therapy and serious work on myself, i would no longer meet the criteria for diagnosis. I am not cured but I don't react the same as I used to and I'm learning to ride the waves better.
DBT? I'm so interested!
It's interesting about the comorbidities with BPD. I think a lot of mental health problems are overlapping. I was diagnosed with ADHD and I think that I might be my mildly autistic. I have problems regulating intense anger... But I don't often suffer from depression or feelings of emptiness or self-harm etc. but I still plan on asking my psychiatrist to assess me for BPD just to check. I just had a really bad trigger and disregulation episode brought on by intents feelings of betrayal and distrust. I do identify with some of the shorts I've seen about regulating yourself by not saying extremely cutting things to someone and rather just having them be dead to you. Anyone that can get you to bring out the so called daggers might not be worth your time.
21:27 lack of sleep, and everything afterwards.
23:29 bored
Not being attuned to activates me. My parents were so checked out so it makes sense.
Straight to the point of Xannie.. same here everytime I being nasty, gaslighting or verbally bullying (no cursing) my bf, even he said he'll always be here or offer love and kiss i know in their heart prbably not gonna stay.
With my bpd turning into quiet bpd now it feels like purgatory like if time isn’t moving, the world is not changing im stuck in a void of meaningless existence and an intense desire to leave this reality in hopes of another that will be separated from the average human experience. Bare in mind I have a great life and when I’m at work I am completely fulfilled and happy it’s hours outside of work or in the morning when I’m not busy where I get frustrated with the mundaness of existence that suicidal ideation begins to kick in
Interesting! 3:23 would y’all say flare up is better for depression as well, or does Major depression co-occurring with BPD have episodes?
Clinically, major depression is considered an episodic disorder (it’s a mood disorder, which are currently all episodic). So, you experience episodes of major depression. Having co-occurring BPD might mean you experience some other BPD symptoms during a depressive episode, but those symptoms are still not considered to be episodic (from a clinical perspective).
@@thebpdbunch awesome, thanks so much!
OMG FIRSTT
Carys - I am also autistic. :)
I have a question: As a topic for a later date, could the group speak about AI, chat into picture. Aspect of AI, on BPD?
How long can these episodes go on for?
It can vary a lot! They tend to be relatively short lived, like a few hours. But some situations can activate longer episodes - it really depends on the context and the individual
It's amazing. Mother and two sisters in law all exhibit symptoms (since I am not a MD). Do people tend to marry BPDs if raised by one? That is my theory.
I felt bad deep inside but I don't have the face to apologize or soft down, i could only keep one intention which is wayward and uncontrollable tantrum...
nice