Repairing
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 12 ก.พ. 2024
- The more you care, the more you fight. At some points in our life, we're bound to argue and disagree with family. That limbo can be hours, days, weeks, months, or even years. It's a painful process to sever a relationship with people you love, and it's an even slower process to repair.
I hope this video can come as a hopeful message for those who are having difficult times with family.
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It’s not easy for Asian parents to admit mistakes…this is such a heart warming video
Was it really a mistake tho?
Her parent, without knowing anything else about her new foreign boyfriend that popped out of the blue with no further education and job hopping as a chef.
Like lol, the real mistake would have to not even question it. Especially since this is your daughter which you have poured so much love time and money into.
@@RukiaHayashi every asian parents would be piss off....i swear what is up with asian girls and mid white boys
@@RukiaHayashi But I think there are reasonable limits to questioning relationships. Historically relationships & marriages were seen as a way to advance your own social/political/economic status. Feelings were largely irrelevant, and this for some reason still persists today. Families would rather see you with someone with money than someone who makes you happy.
Not just in Asian but also Ethnic communities tend to be really critical of a spouse, often asking "what they do" which often translates to "how much money do they make?" This is well meaning but is deeply rooted in a really unhealthy and unrealistic reality. This can be motivated by a real desire to not see their kids struggle like they did, but it completely misses other key indicators of happiness. Many communities globally rank highly in well-being indicators, despite not always being the most well off financially.
When you say "pouring time and love into your daughter" it really is dehumanising. People/kids aren't investments, and I wish more families would accept the reality that in this day and age, you don't marry or have kids to secure legacies, secure land titles or for financial gain. It is such an antiquated ideology that I'm glad we are tackling and finally talking about.
Financial status does not equal happiness. It can ensure security and stability, of course, but we are increasingly seeing that life is about more than just simply existing.
@@zainarif5767 i see it as HER life to experience and learn. Every Asian parents had been controlled and resisted by their own parents to take the safe path aka following the heard. This is them breaking that practice and opening upto new possibilities of the modern times.
also what a gross way to bet on something's downfall.
Mistake? Her parents are right and she'll - unfortunately- end up hurt and heart broken when he ends things and gets a free restaurant. 🤷🏻♂️
Your mum talking about your dad was the best part. "I think I like him". I've been with my partner 19 years and I say this all the time.
“Likes” her husband but “loves” Kevin….
@@hikhang4820 what do u mean by that
@@hikhang4820it’s not that deep lmao
@@hikhang4820who?
Oh my god, hearing your mom talk about Kevin made me cry. She’s such a strong woman for admitting her stereotype with tattoos. It takes a really mentally healthy adult to realize their mistakes and admitting it (not even mentioning to a large audience). Even though she’s not my mom, I felt like I was healed from the Q&A section of the video 😭♥️
Yeah I don’t think my mum has ever apologised lol. Ignoring sarcastic or guilt trippy apologies.
I went through what Tina did with my parents but it lasted 8 years. In the end, my parents love my husband soo much. But they would never admit they were wrong in any way
❤❤
Kevin is a keeper! He saw beyond himself... family means everything!
Amen
@@zainarif5767dude why are you so pressed about this dude being the ideal boyfriend/husband material. Or are you just projecting your own issues onto him?
Live and let live dude, you’re projecting so hard.
Just chillax dude
@@zainarif5767i think you are cause i see you multiple times just pissed off at the stuff that works for tina and her family 💀💀 if shes making such a “big mistake” who fucking cares?? that for her to learn from. also the restaurant says permanently closed on google but you can still make reservations through their website. i swear all of your comments on her videoS are just you coping hard.
This was so wholesome. Thank you for sharing such a private and personal part of your life🤍 also your mom looks so young!🥹
❤
She had to mend the relationship and do it fast because she knew her restaurant was about to close. Need to open up the cookie jar that never runs out of cookies.
Omg the in and out of sleep girl
Kevin changed everybody into better adults and you all changed & enlightened Kevin.
Wow its so wonderful that she actually admits that it was wrong to treat him based on her stereotypes.
Yea and I think her having the stereotype is okay. Things become a stereotype because there is some truth to them. However the problem was that she didn’t even try to get to know him and confirm whether the stereotype was true about him.
Every person is different so you have to give them an opportunity to disprove any of your preconceived notions.
I cried when her mom admitted that. I felt like it was very brave of her
Or maybe she told her mom to say that to make herself look good lol
That's the problem with some of you. It's okay to have the stereotypes because it means you are being cautious and protective of you or your love ones from getting hurt. Everyone has stereotypes and I find it disingenuous when non-Asians talk crap about Koreans having the stereotypes when in fact, no one is more stereotypical and prejudiced than Westerners. I am Korean who grew up in the US and I can write a whole book about how much stereotypes and racism I've had to endure from good ole Americans. Ask yourself, I mean ASK YOURSELF, dont you have a stereotype of certain race or a group of people?? Because, I sure do and have never been wrong!! It was a matter of time the bf was accepted by the parents. One thing you people don't know about Korean parents they will surrender in the end to make their children happy. Koreans parents will not stand still seeing their children unhappy or suffer whatever that maybe.
@Mijah1016 Culturally you grew up American and it shows since you completely disregard the culture differences in "Western" culture. Europe alone has so many different cultures/viewpoints. There is no western ideology and no western behavior. America is on a different CONTINTENT and is already so culturally diverse. I'm sick of people assuming there's one "American" viewpoint let alone one "western" viewpoint which includes Europe as well.
😂😂😂I laughed too hard when she said "he's handsome in parts"😂
"I think I like him" 🤣
The way she said not combinated well was so fucking funny. LMAO
She roasted the sh!t out of her husband in the nicest way possible. 😂
it’s hard cause they have a different concept of ‘handsome’ and ‘good looking’ in korean culture and they don’t typically consider foreigners like her bf to be in their standards.
Dad getting dragged and catching bullets from Mom, lol.
bruh your mom getting emotional got ME emotional 😭 to be able to admit she was wrong in her past prejudices on camera, let alone TO her child and child's partner, is monumental for asian parents. kudos to your mom for the growth 🥺🫶🏼
Thank you for being so real on this channel. It's seriously not easy these days to find media that isn't fabricated to look a certain way. Vulnerability is such a strong power and you sharing your struggles is not only refreshing but empowering to see. Keep doing what you do Doobs!
Love mama dooby for being so vulnerable and honest, very hard for parents to admit when they are wrong. So happy for you, Kevin and your parents. It was also nice to hear Kevin encouraged you to speak to your parents regardless of how they felt abt him in the beginning 💕
Wow I really admire your mom the fact that she was so honest and accepted the fact that she was wrong or had a stereotype I really admire her.
"he looks good it parts but not the combination" had me rolling 😭😭😭😭😭
The fact that your mother was able to recognise she was stereotyping Kevin and look back at her behaviour shows how much she loves you. Its not often we accept that we are in the wrong
hes a white boy ...millions of korean men ..i get mom was piss off
Hi Dooby, I had to cry watching this video, seeing both of you being very humble, especially your mother admitting what she had done wrong in the past in front of the camera. That is NOT EASY, and growing up in an Asian household, it is very rare to see our parent's generation having a flexible mindset. I also want to thank you for sharing your story. I also had a hard time with my mother, went through a huge fight, and then restored our relationship. It took patience and time to sit together having tough & heartbreaking conversations, especially letting them know you are now a grown adult/individual with your own value. But this would make the relationship much stronger. I wish you and your family the best Dooby! ❤ (Sorry, my English may not be perfect, I am your fan from Japan❤)
your english is perfect!
Even I feel part of the family as Ive seen all your journeys through your food, struggles, relationships, and life morals. I’m so happy for you ❤
I was an only child and can relate to the weird, good/bad dynamics of being in an only child household. Like Tina, because my parents kept a tight leash on me, i always struggled to want to do my own thing and break free. As a result, we butt heads all the time, but one thing i never doubted was my parent's love for me! We were a solid, unbreakeable unit as a family. I am turning 51 now, been happily married 23 years to my "umbrella man" , both parents have gone. I miss them terribly!!! Like a part of me isn't there anymore. Cherish your parents while they are still around Tina! They are your wealth in this world!
She's so honest about everything. It's so refreshing to see people being honest online. Especially about plastic surgery and her opinion on tattoo. ❤
What surgery
There's tons of people who are honest online you just must be following and watching only fake people
@@guynumber20 her mum said shes gotten plastic surgery done on her nose (cut off a bump she had on the nose bridge)
@@doodbro931 you must have been living under a rock. Because people nowadays on social media don't get honest about their work done. And when asked completely denies the allegations.
@rain_ig not talking about plastic surgery bud. That was just one thing this person said. They said "especially" about plastic surgery, meaning that in addition to what they implied, they're also including plastic surgery
My Korea mom's way of showing her love is yelling at me, telling me I'm useless, and then making me food and cutting me fruit.
So another words, the Asian parent stereotype, but reality then. The whole "joke" about Asian parents wanting their kids to be lawyers or doctors and being emotionless to them etc. is really sad when you hear that sometimes it's kind of true I guess. But I'm glad she makes you food and cuts you fruit :) (and man Korean fruit is so good)
@@LordLOC different times. Remember our parents were raised by a generation that lived through a gruesome war which knocked out 10% of the whole population. Mass starvation and a struggle to survive. They had to be hard af mentally just to make it. They never learned to express emotions openly. We have to work to break the generational trauma but at the same time be empathetic to their reality.
@@TravelWithNala That is true. Thankfully it seems the "younger" parents of Gen Z kids etc. are more open to, opening up better. I'd imagine it would be pretty rough growing up like that otherwise.
Great content Doob’s👏👏👏
Coming from a white family the experience wasn’t much different. I think eastern european families operate more like an asian family. My family is from Czechoslovakia and Germany, but have lived in America for the last 120years.
Family gatherings are always extremely awkward because we are bad at showing love, it is so bad that we threw a party getting together 100people from our extended family just to celebrate my grandmothers birthday, and she didn’t even want to go. When she does go to these gatherings she always leaves after like 1hour.
My mom also thought being hyper critical of everything I did was showing love. She was never satisfied. She forced me to start working at 15years old, and then once I had a part time job she started complaining that I was never home due to work.
My dad is different, he is great at socializing and doesn’t try to force me to do anything, but he is still very stubborn in his own way. He is all about the hyper masculine “suck it up” mentality, with a very high work ethic and willpower. He is also wicked smart. For most of my childhood I spent all of my energy trying to find a question that he didn’t have an answer to, until one day he had no choice to get annoyed at me and say that he didn’t know. He’s the guy everyone asks for help, and I ended up becoming just like him.
The last part made me cry. I am so happy for you.💕
Your mom speaks so beautifully
You can definitely see how happy Dooby is to hear her mom's new outlook on Kevin. Happy for the family!
These videos are such a good mix of funny, warm, and insightful. It's not easy to talk about personal things and this was done really well.
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I loved watching the qa section of the video. I love that your mom was able to admit she was wrong and is embracing everything in your life and I love that things are doing better with your family.
the conversation with you and your mom was so heartwarming! thank you for sharing and especially your mom for sharing 🫶
Your mom is amazing. 🥺❤️ The dogs on the background is a mood too! ❤
Witnessing this journey and seeing how things have resolved is heart-warming. Everything takes time, and I am waiting to resolve things with my family as well. You were surely a part of my teenage fantasy, following you when I was about 17 or 18ish, now I am about to be 20. I know a lot has changed and a lot will be changing. I will also be with this channel in my 20s amidst all the changes.
I am very happy that you have a closer relationship with your family! It takes a lot to repair relationships and I appreciate what you and your mom have shared about your process. Your mom is Awesome...it must have taken a lot for her to admit her mistakes. She's such a good person, and we need more people like her in this world! Loved this video! 😊
This was so touching. So happy your family relationship is healing ❤
Your mom is so pretty, I hope that you are able to continue to foster and healthy relationship with truly unconditional love and support no matter who you love. I also hope Kevin is truly comfortable and not having to conform.
Aw we love mama dooby, its so heart warming to see this! And as a guy with alot of tattoos who dated a korean girl in the past, I did experience the stereotype that people have against people with lots of tattoos. Its so nice to see your mom come through and see past those things and grow!
This video is so heartwarming. Glad to see everyone healing ❤️🩹 ❤❤
Your mom is so refreshing!! I really appreciate her honesty. 재밌게 잘 봤어용
dooby, this was beautiful. i've followed your growth since 2020 (when i was in high school) and i remember laughing/crying/feeling everything through your videos because it seemed like our life chapters aligned - including rough patches with asian parents. this brought me so much joy!
you're also part of the reason why i started my own food channel. the stories you share, the heartbreaks, the memories, the everything - you inspire me every day.
That's love right there, everyone learning from each other and changing for the better
All the blessings to you and your family!
This video feels like a warm hug and I loved every bit of it! Thank you Tina for sharing such intimate details of your life
Loved the q&a with your mama. So happy to see your family smiling and together. “The fighting was necessary” comment was so true!!! Went through the same type of family drama and now closer than ever. Very beautiful video!❤
I never knew you were a single child, but now looking back at your older videos, I can see the characteristics and trades of such. It's great to see you and your parents making progress. You are so different around your Mom, it's refreshing.
Kevin is SOOOOO nice. He was so kind when my friend n I was dining at mija seoul. He knew we were doobies and told us we might be able to catch Tina if we stayed a little longer 🥲
Thank you for sharing this positivity into the world. I went through this too. My mom would never admit she was wrong much less with such grace. This is beautiful to see and I’m sure you’ll both cherish this video as time passes.
thank you for sharing your family Q&A with us. My mom and I have never been close, and it hurts me deeply to know I do not have that bond, but seeing this is really comforting and makes me happy to see that people can change.. it just takes time. hopefully. TY tina
I love this so much I teared up. It’s so nice to see the love your mom has for Kevin now.
This was amazing! I laughed, I cried. I’m so happy for you and your parents. I have two daughters 23 and 21 and I can only imagine how difficult it was for all of you when you went through your hard time. But it’s beautiful to see this growth. You and mama dooby are beautiful. Thank you for being so open and honest and vulnerable ♥️💫
I’m so happy for you, also sobbing here🤍 sending love and I’m so proud of you 💕
Your parents were only being parents trying to look out for your future, your mother is an angel for even speaking on how she felt and the growth in your relationship is beautiful ❤
i was re watching some old dooby videos and got so excited to see a new one posted! and this one was so special!!! i laughed! i cried ! part of my heart was healed through you healing your relationship with your family! 🩷
Watching you grow throughout the years have been an inspiration for me and people out there. Thank you for sharing your life with us. So proud of you!
Respect to your Mum for being so open in discussing her change in view.
kudos to your parents & kevin. Shows that love means they're willing to put aside any differences and open their hearts to each other because Kevin sees how much you love your parents and your parents see how happy Kevin makes you. Everyone just needed time. Kudos to you too for being patient too. Things worth fighting for don't come easy.
Happy Lunar new year to all of you . I am older than Mrs. Choi and never doubted things would work this way . Your parents are special. I live in Vancouver andmeet many Korean parents who are forced to have that separated life you describe. Ahhh but their sacrifice will pay off. I see it in their accomplished children every day. Very few western parents would do this. Much respect and love for all . Fighting
Watching you and your mom be so authentic and vulnerable, on a TWITCH STREAM no less, honestly made me cry ❤ thank you for sharing this
we love you so much dooby!!! this has got to be one of my favorite videos of you 🥹❤️ raw, honest, and real!!! never stop BEING YOU
Sometimes I just wonder.... how the hell is your content sooooo refined. It's wonderful. And hearts to your mama... she spoke amazingly. I felt the tears ❤
i'm happy for you dooby. hope 2024 is full of family moments together (and a lot of good food).
This was so beautiful how your family came back together. I relate to this on so many levels. ❤
Its heartwarming seeing Kevin with your family 🥹 he is such a lovely guy and your parents should consider themselves lucky you are in good hands 💖
I love that you are well! Family is really important!! Wish you all the best!
this is actually so sweet omg
it's obvious your mom has done a lot of work on herself and unlearning to reach a point of being able to own those past mistakes and repair/build relationships with both you and kevin. and that's really awesome! korean culture, especially for older generations, is so rigid and inflexible in a lot of ways so I'm sure this growth was very difficult and painful but i hope in the long term it results in better/deeper/stronger/more authentic relationships for you all
What a display of humility for a Mom. Great Q&A.
This makes my heart so happy, and I loooovvveeeee Momma Tina! To come around and even address that she was wrong makes me love and respect her so much!
This is awesome!!! It's great to see the interactions with your parents.
When your mom said she loves Kevin…. All the tears and emotions felt. Thank you for sharing ❤
This is so sweet ! I’m so happy that you and your mom got close to each other again ❤
just amazing man congratulations on how far you and your family has come! God bless ✝
It makes me emotional watching you reconnect and interact with your family. It's been a long time since that has happened for my family, but it gives me hope that someday it will.
It's so adorable and wholesome to see all of you just making this beautiful family together..you guys seem so close to each other and Kevin now seem to be so adored and integral to the family ❤
“he is handsome just in parts but not combinated well” im dyingg mama dooby is so real it’s hilarious
lots of love and growth and well wishes for the whole family.
You are SO lucky! This makes me so happy 💗 I love your mom
My heart
I started tearing up when doobys mom started tearing up!!!
Kevin is such a great human being! Thank you to share this with us
Who's Kevin ?
This video is so cosy and warm. Congrats on rebuild your relationship with parents :)
I'm glad you were able to repair the relationship or at least move in that direction!
Do we know why they were apart before?
@@pstt10 yes... She made a few videos about it... From what I gathered it was based on her parents views of her place in the world...
What a beautiful video! Love the moment when you were all sitting together at the fire, such an intimate moment somehow. Thanks for sharing!
Omg, why am I tearing up❤ ugh this is so good. So happy for you
Heart warming as ever, thanks for sharing with your family :)
The sweetest video on yt I love your mom she's so understanding
I watched the full Mama Dooby livestream and it was so lovely and honest. Im glad you guys patched things up❤
Such a heartwarming video. Love your family!
im literally sobbing for the last 10 minutes of this video. glad to see you guys are getting so close again, so adorable!
The understandings between generations is what made me cry when I first started watching K-dramas. I can relate to your experience because it's been a personal journey in developing an adult relationship with my own mother. Your Q&A made me cry! The mixture of eastern and western perspectives with a Kevin thrown into the mix is a big challenge especially when it comes to a relationship with parents you never want to sever. I'm just happy to see your family in a good place now!
I absolutely loved this video, I'm so happy to see you being reunited with your family and all being one ❤Happy to see you healing, to see you be yourself again.
I’m so happy that everything got better for you, wish you all the best ❤
This chapter brings me tears 😅❤. I love how both of you opened the conversations. It is difficult to be in a relationship with someone outside of your circle, especially from asian families. I can understand as i was in a similar situation. With all the great intentions parents have for their children, but sometimes, the concerns are delivered in a different way and with different personalities trande it can clash . I am glad you and kevin and the whole family are getting well ❤😊
Awww this literally made me ball SO HAPPY FOR U GIRL N KEVIN ofc 🫶🏼🫶🏼🫶🏼
This video makes me so so so happy for you Tina! Love to see you win girl 🎉
I commend your mom for being so vulnerable to your YT community and being real/genuine. She is allowed to have her initial hesitation and it isn’t easy knowing folks who are of non Korean background may judge her but I get the parenting thoughts and love how you guys are showing resolution. Thanks for sharing your journey!
it takes a lot of courage to acknowledge our wrongdoings and faults fully like your mom did here! My kudos to her
your mom is very pretty! thank u for the wholesome video it meant a lot to me
This hands down was such an amazing video to watch. Because the struggle with families is so multicultural. And it’s so universal. I am so happy to see everything working so great for your whole family and everyone you continue to bless. Happy lunar new year to you and your family. And tell your mom and dad we are so so blessed to have them In your vlog. ❤
Love you guys to death and I’m so glad your family has learned and grown with each other about each other it’s a beautiful thing!
We Love you!!! Please get well soon and we cannot wait to see a better of you!
this is absolutely beautiful. what a beautiful family and beautiful relationships you guys have🥺❤ momma Dooby is absolutely precious, I'm very proud of her and all of you for getting through all this together. amazing❤ momma Dooby's emotions talking about Kevin is so telling that she has a wonderful soul. what beautiful people! I can't get over it or express it enough!😂❤ momma Dooby is also hilarious and beautiful, an all around wonderful person!
I'm so so happy for you and mama, Tina. This is so amazing, and I can feel the love. Makes me happy you two have each other for life again
Mom is such a wonderful person 💕 😊
Everyone has already said how heartwarming this video was so i'll come out and say how absolutely gorgeous your mom is!! And she has the perfect glass skin.
Omg Dooby's mom is adorable! It's so lovely to hear how her opinions of Kevin have changed after getting to know him and how she totally owns up to being wrong in stereotyping people. BIG RESPECT to her for openly admitting that ❤️ So glad that they are all able to move past issues and continue to grow and learn together 😊
I made some questionable and difficult education choices as a teen too and I appreciate that my parents let me go, but I also carried that feeling of “you chose this so you can’t complain”. I’m a lot older now and it’s easier to be at peace with the consequences of my actions. I hope everyone finds peace with whatever decisions we make, like you have.