I now understand from this body of work that trying to reason with a narcissist is pointless but still I would actually love Zanab to watch these videos or better still her flying monkeys. They really need to to be educated because frankly the way they have treated Cole is the true abuse here.
One very interesting insight I heard about this scene - if Zanab was the victim of abuse the way she claims she was, she would NOT say she would do this experience over again. No abuse victim says they would go through those painful experiences again.
Well... That's not entirely true. My husband and I ended in spectacular fashion. He turned into a completely different person, he was abusive, vengeful, demeaning and made my life a living hell. However.... The beginning of our marriage was some of the most wonderful, blissful times in my life. The love I had for him and the times that we shared, I haven't experienced with another human being since. The thought of having to ensure those bad times again makes me feel physically ill. But would I erase the good times? If I could go back and have avoided him all together? I honestly don't know if I would want to be without those memories. They shaped who I was. They fulfilled me in a way that I don't regret. It's really a confusing situation bc the bad times were BAD. Downright abuse. Now I will say that her little 3 week stint does not in any way compare and I don't believe a word she says. I'm just saying that the answer is not always that easy.
She's so awful. What a liar! Even at the reunion she was trying to damage his reputation forever. Good on the producers for airing the truth. Now the whole world can see her for what she truly is. Cole has golden retriever energy and he deserves a kind upbeat non-psycho girl.
That reunion pissed me the hell off, the way everybody ganged up on Cole was so corny. Zanab was literally telling on herself the whole entire reunion and was showing obvious signs that she was the problem & they still viewed her as the victim. If I were Cole I would’ve broke contact with everybody after that.
They say that they don’t hate Cole, yet then proceed to treat him terribly at a birthday party in the After The Altar episodes (1year later update). They also gossip about him, & make fun of him behind his back, they even exclude him from their conversations & aren’t inviting or welcoming. The only one being friendly to him at the party is Bartise. Their actions show how they didn’t keep their word, especially Zanab. These women in Zanab’s circle are gonna be in for a rude awakening when she eventually does the same thing to them too.
God I feel so bad for him. Hes being attacked for all her slandering, it’s horrible. He was abused at the alter and then painted as the abuser, it’s so awful. Like heartbreaking.
The part that was most telling for me was the cuties clip beginning. This is where Cole made a suggestion to Zainab, and was thoroughly rejected by her. It showed just how dismissive she is of him, yet in her stories about him, she hangs on his every word so much it destroys her. This dismissiveness is a key trait of narcissists. The constant diminishing of a partner is one of the silent abuses that happen in a narcissistic relationship.
You really blew my mind. I was watching all 10 chapters and you explained it really well, that is you backed up my gut feeling with your scientific explanations. It really is horrifying. She wanted to destroy him and she wouldn't stop. But the fact that it's reality tv, actually helped! We now see 1 to 1 how a person is destroyed and how others help. Alexa, Nancy especially. If it hadn't been aired and set right, she would have single handedly his reputation. That woman is dangerous.
I'm glad you enjoyed it. Yes, sadly in real life without the cameras, these situations often end up as he-said, she-said situations and the narcissist gets away with their lies.
It’s pretty heartbreaking to see the damage Cole had gone through. My dad is a narcissist and I have grown up experiencing everything you talk about in your videos. I didn’t realize how much of a toll it has taken on me until I got older and formed my own relationships. I can empathize with Cole.. and I just wanted to say that your videos have really helped bring peace and order back to my mind. I have a lot of recovering to do, but this has definitely been a start for me. Thank you
Sooo excited about that quick Irina and Micah photo you squeezed in there at the end lol Totally looking forward to hearing your thoughts on them. This has been such a good series!
I feel like it’s girls like zanab that create Andrew Tate / manosphere types and as a woman I am so not ok with behavior like this from women… it makes sense as to why I really did not like her the entire season. I put this on the same level as women who lie about SA
@@solomoon3083 totally disagree, our environments which in this scenario include social norms and behaviors can 100% effect you. Abuse in the home, bullying it all effects is through trauma and over time if we don’t deal with it, it can also effect us as adults. Trauma can also trigger mental health “diseases” ??? Not sure how to word that but trauma can trigger schizophrenia, psychopathy, etc especially if it runs in your family. That’s all I’m saying. Obviously some people are just jerks by design but you’d be shocked to know the effects society has on us as human beings and the way we behave.
Your videos are very helpful! I just binged this whole series on Zanab & Cole and was shocked to realize her behavior resembled one of my parents. This has given me the tools I need to identify their behavior & validated my experiences when dealing with them. Would definitely love if you did a video on how a covert narcissistic parent deals with their child, both in youth & as an adult. Keep up the great work!
I'm glad to hear they have helped you. It's certainly quite a shock when you get that sudden realization about somebody close to you. I would love to do a video on a narcissist parent in the future. Reality TV tends to focus more on intimate relationships, but there are still some good parent-child examples out there.
The whole season I peeped she was emotional unstable and Very passive aggressive. Classic narc, flipping the narrative to tarnish their victims image. I hope she gets the help she needs. As well as Cole.
What’s interesting is in the one of the After the Altar episodes, she mentions that she has a therapist now. She said she was looking for someone to tell her straight out whether or not she was blowing things out of proportion or misinterpreting things… That was huge for me to hear because she truly is unaware of her toxic behavior and how she was in the wrong and probably has been in so many situations throughout her life. I think the “cuties” scene was a wake up call for her. Not because she clearly saw she was in the wrong with how she interpreted, twisted and recounted the story, but with how *everyone else* saw those things and was holding her accountable. She received so much well deserved backlash. At first she fought against it and was probably experiencing cognitive dissonance but a part of her may have started to reconcile what really happened in that scene, what was said and how it was intended. I think she’s truly looking for a professional to tell her “yeah, girl you’re nuts” lol before she’ll actually see it.
Thank you so much for taking the time to analyze these human interactions. It really allows for a clear look into the mind of manipulator. This was eye opening and I look forward to more of your blogs!!! Good job! Love your input!!
I just love this series. what your doing here is sooo needed. I could watch it over and over again. Learning about narcissist behavior with these characters is very amazing!
Astute observation of the time of day the cuties scene took place vs when she said it took places She also said she “stopped eating” and “didn’t have time to eat.”
Thank you so much for your incredibly helpful analyses! I so so so appreciate all of your hard work in putting these videos together and have shared your videos with others so that they, too, may develop a stronger eye for narcissist behaviors and more quickly remove themselves from the manipulation and abuse! And, YES, thanks to your analyses, I IMMEDIATELY recognized the narcissism in Micah and Irina and have been pointing it out to my husband as we watch Season 4 together... Your work is SO HELPFUL!
Hurt people hurt people. And everyone makes PLENTY of mistakes in life. But when someone is convincing you that what you've done is so terrible and then when you're finally like wholly sh!t I've been so off that I really did destroy someone's self esteem? to then have them downplay it and be like hey hey hey I've forgiven you 🌪 man or woman: run
They are two narcissists coming together to create a "mean girls" clique. I will be analysing them in detail due to the large number of requests. (And if there's interest, I'll point out some other times this type of alliance between narcissists has occurred in reality TV).
Congrats on 1K subscribers..you deserve way more. You have done a great job. You know you are doing well when others are already starting to copy your style:) Look forward to future videos.👍
I watched the whole season, I think zey setup poor cole😢he was always honest and fallen for her eventually but she took advantage about the fact that he loved her and blamed on him all
how was him not reaching out after she made it clear she wanted nothing to do with him a lack of accountability?? raven was my favorite this season but this always annoys me.
Would you consider doing commentary or analysis of Shake from season 2? Or have u considered doing videos on why someone isn’t a narcissist but falls under another category? Thanks loved ur videos
Shake is actually on my list, but my time is very limited and it depends whether I have a chance to loop back and do earlier seasons. I wish I had started the analyses years ago 😂 That's an interesting idea. I don't want to dilute from the message of the channel too much so probably won't do an entire video or series on a non-narcissist. But perhaps I could point out when people are showing highly empathetic behaviors.
I hope cole sees your videos
I AGREE
Me too. They would make him feel so much more sane.
I now understand from this body of work that trying to reason with a narcissist is pointless but still I would actually love Zanab to watch these videos or better still her flying monkeys. They really need to to be educated because frankly the way they have treated Cole is the true abuse here.
Absolutely! Wish her flying monkey friends would too. Eventually she’ll flip on them too
Was thinking the same
Thank God that Cole had the presence of mind to challenge the producers to run the footage, and that they obliged.
They had to. Zanab’s accusations made them into enablers. They had to defend themselves.
without that footage, I would think a lot of people would still feel he is evil
@@mwoods4608 agreed. Narcs run the world. They are counting on you not challenging them. They are attracted to those who are more vulnerable.
One very interesting insight I heard about this scene - if Zanab was the victim of abuse the way she claims she was, she would NOT say she would do this experience over again. No abuse victim says they would go through those painful experiences again.
Well... That's not entirely true. My husband and I ended in spectacular fashion. He turned into a completely different person, he was abusive, vengeful, demeaning and made my life a living hell. However.... The beginning of our marriage was some of the most wonderful, blissful times in my life. The love I had for him and the times that we shared, I haven't experienced with another human being since. The thought of having to ensure those bad times again makes me feel physically ill. But would I erase the good times? If I could go back and have avoided him all together? I honestly don't know if I would want to be without those memories. They shaped who I was. They fulfilled me in a way that I don't regret. It's really a confusing situation bc the bad times were BAD. Downright abuse.
Now I will say that her little 3 week stint does not in any way compare and I don't believe a word she says. I'm just saying that the answer is not always that easy.
She's so awful. What a liar! Even at the reunion she was trying to damage his reputation forever. Good on the producers for airing the truth. Now the whole world can see her for what she truly is. Cole has golden retriever energy and he deserves a kind upbeat non-psycho girl.
seeing cole cry broke my heart, he looked so drained and tired of everything...
He looked like an emotional abuse victim
Wow. It was heartbreaking watching Cole try to understand her.
That reunion pissed me the hell off, the way everybody ganged up on Cole was so corny. Zanab was literally telling on herself the whole entire reunion and was showing obvious signs that she was the problem & they still viewed her as the victim. If I were Cole I would’ve broke contact with everybody after that.
They say that they don’t hate Cole, yet then proceed to treat him terribly at a birthday party in the After The Altar episodes (1year later update). They also gossip about him, & make fun of him behind his back, they even exclude him from their conversations & aren’t inviting or welcoming. The only one being friendly to him at the party is Bartise.
Their actions show how they didn’t keep their word, especially Zanab.
These women in Zanab’s circle are gonna be in for a rude awakening when she eventually does the same thing to them too.
She had her flying Minnie's all lined up against him. So traumatic for the poor guy.
God I feel so bad for him. Hes being attacked for all her slandering, it’s horrible. He was abused at the alter and then painted as the abuser, it’s so awful. Like heartbreaking.
Watching her manipulate him in real time is devastating and obscene.he’s clearly a good person and she is a narcissistic, abusive manipulator.
She really thought she did something. The lack of awareness is astounding.
The part that was most telling for me was the cuties clip beginning. This is where Cole made a suggestion to Zainab, and was thoroughly rejected by her. It showed just how dismissive she is of him, yet in her stories about him, she hangs on his every word so much it destroys her. This dismissiveness is a key trait of narcissists. The constant diminishing of a partner is one of the silent abuses that happen in a narcissistic relationship.
Great point
You really blew my mind. I was watching all 10 chapters and you explained it really well, that is you backed up my gut feeling with your scientific explanations. It really is horrifying. She wanted to destroy him and she wouldn't stop. But the fact that it's reality tv, actually helped! We now see 1 to 1 how a person is destroyed and how others help. Alexa, Nancy especially. If it hadn't been aired and set right, she would have single handedly his reputation. That woman is dangerous.
I'm glad you enjoyed it. Yes, sadly in real life without the cameras, these situations often end up as he-said, she-said situations and the narcissist gets away with their lies.
She also takes out a bowl of (what looks like) cherries, before eating the cuties. She omitted that as well.
Which Cole ate with her and might have been why he questioned her on eating the oranges as well. Context is so important.
@@StephanieSwan666 exactly!
Wow. They are really so eerily talented at ruining a person's credibility and personhood. I've been Cole and I feel for him rn.
It’s pretty heartbreaking to see the damage Cole had gone through. My dad is a narcissist and I have grown up experiencing everything you talk about in your videos. I didn’t realize how much of a toll it has taken on me until I got older and formed my own relationships. I can empathize with Cole.. and I just wanted to say that your videos have really helped bring peace and order back to my mind. I have a lot of recovering to do, but this has definitely been a start for me. Thank you
Sooo excited about that quick Irina and Micah photo you squeezed in there at the end lol Totally looking forward to hearing your thoughts on them. This has been such a good series!
But Jackie...when you think it couldn't get worse..
@@connie27100 Can I tell you! The way I was hollering at my phone when I was watching lol I kept thinking this must be scripted 😂
😂 I was wondering if anyone would notice that.
I feel like it’s girls like zanab that create Andrew Tate / manosphere types and as a woman I am so not ok with behavior like this from women… it makes sense as to why I really did not like her the entire season. I put this on the same level as women who lie about SA
I don’t think so. No one really becomes something that they aren’t meant to be.
@@solomoon3083 totally disagree, our environments which in this scenario include social norms and behaviors can 100% effect you. Abuse in the home, bullying it all effects is through trauma and over time if we don’t deal with it, it can also effect us as adults. Trauma can also trigger mental health “diseases” ??? Not sure how to word that but trauma can trigger schizophrenia, psychopathy, etc especially if it runs in your family. That’s all I’m saying. Obviously some people are just jerks by design but you’d be shocked to know the effects society has on us as human beings and the way we behave.
why does she say "hadn't had a chance to eat" if what she felt she was actually doing was starving herself on purpose?
Everything is his fault, even her choices. For instance, when she took over dinner prep from him, that was his fault too.
Just wanted to say I love your videos and you deserve more subscribers. Hoping you might make some videos on the latest Love is Blind season.
Coming up!
@@thenarcissistwatcher pls react to Jackelina and Irina
This analysis of a midrange narcisist, is absolutely brilliant!!! I send you my greetings from Spain!!👌
She dragged him....at the wedding what is she talking about 😑🙄
Your videos are very helpful! I just binged this whole series on Zanab & Cole and was shocked to realize her behavior resembled one of my parents. This has given me the tools I need to identify their behavior & validated my experiences when dealing with them. Would definitely love if you did a video on how a covert narcissistic parent deals with their child, both in youth & as an adult. Keep up the great work!
I'm glad to hear they have helped you. It's certainly quite a shock when you get that sudden realization about somebody close to you.
I would love to do a video on a narcissist parent in the future. Reality TV tends to focus more on intimate relationships, but there are still some good parent-child examples out there.
The whole season I peeped she was emotional unstable and Very passive aggressive. Classic narc, flipping the narrative to tarnish their victims image. I hope she gets the help she needs. As well as Cole.
What’s interesting is in the one of the After the Altar episodes, she mentions that she has a therapist now. She said she was looking for someone to tell her straight out whether or not she was blowing things out of proportion or misinterpreting things… That was huge for me to hear because she truly is unaware of her toxic behavior and how she was in the wrong and probably has been in so many situations throughout her life.
I think the “cuties” scene was a wake up call for her. Not because she clearly saw she was in the wrong with how she interpreted, twisted and recounted the story, but with how *everyone else* saw those things and was holding her accountable. She received so much well deserved backlash. At first she fought against it and was probably experiencing cognitive dissonance but a part of her may have started to reconcile what really happened in that scene, what was said and how it was intended. I think she’s truly looking for a professional to tell her “yeah, girl you’re nuts” lol before she’ll actually see it.
I saw the notification and came straight here😂
Thank you so much for taking the time to analyze these human interactions. It really allows for a clear look into the mind of manipulator. This was eye opening and I look forward to more of your blogs!!! Good job! Love your input!!
I just love this series. what your doing here is sooo needed. I could watch it over and over again. Learning about narcissist behavior with these characters is very amazing!
Astute observation of the time of day the cuties scene took place vs when she said it took places She also said she “stopped eating” and “didn’t have time to eat.”
I hope Zenab watched these... she lacks self awareness...its sad
Nah a person like this is not capable of any real self reflection.
Thank you so much for your incredibly helpful analyses! I so so so appreciate all of your hard work in putting these videos together and have shared your videos with others so that they, too, may develop a stronger eye for narcissist behaviors and more quickly remove themselves from the manipulation and abuse! And, YES, thanks to your analyses, I IMMEDIATELY recognized the narcissism in Micah and Irina and have been pointing it out to my husband as we watch Season 4 together... Your work is SO HELPFUL!
You're very welcome! It's great to hear that the videos are helping you - reading messages like yours really make it worth all the work 😊
Hurt people hurt people. And everyone makes PLENTY of mistakes in life.
But when someone is convincing you that what you've done is so terrible
and then when you're finally like wholly sh!t I've been so off that I really did destroy someone's self esteem?
to then have them downplay it and be like hey hey hey I've forgiven you
🌪
man or woman: run
Even though I listened to many other analysis of these two. When I see your videos I still need to hear it!!!
Great work, as always. Thoughts on Micah and Irina from season 4?
I was going to comment this too. I think thise two deserve a whole series.
And Jackie too
They are two narcissists coming together to create a "mean girls" clique. I will be analysing them in detail due to the large number of requests. (And if there's interest, I'll point out some other times this type of alliance between narcissists has occurred in reality TV).
@@mayrav.4256 Yes, she is too.
@@thenarcissistwatcher Absolutely.
Thank you for making these videos, she truly Smear Campaigned him
Finally someone else recognized her out of control behavior and all the things ugh I’m not a fan of her but I liked cole 🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤
Congrats on 1K subscribers..you deserve way more. You have done a great job. You know you are doing well when others are already starting to copy your style:) Look forward to future videos.👍
I love these videos, been checking for your latest one for days. So happy to see this post; I really think you offer an excellent analysis.
I love your videos so much. I'm so glad your channel is growing so fast. You really deserve it
Amazing series. Thank you so much for your hard work! I'm learning so much 👍
Thanks for the videos. Educational and interesting content.
I truly hope Cole and everyone on that damn show watch or at least listen to these videos. She was a monster
Congratulations on 1k subs!😊
Damn Z. What a liar!!!!
I really enjoyed the series. Keep up the good work, I hope you'll continue to grow because you deserve it! Thoughts on LIB season 4?
Thanks! There's a good selection of narcissists on season 4 and I'll be analysing certain ones in detail.
@@thenarcissistwatcher I cant wait to watch your analysis of LIB S4, because I have my suspicions.
I watched the whole season, I think zey setup poor cole😢he was always honest and fallen for her eventually but she took advantage about the fact that he loved her and blamed on him all
YES! 🎉
I made a video on Zanab having covert narcissism and I took it down because it got so much critique
It’s the algorithm!
how was him not reaching out after she made it clear she wanted nothing to do with him a lack of accountability?? raven was my favorite this season but this always annoys me.
👏
Would you consider doing commentary or analysis of Shake from season 2?
Or have u considered doing videos on why someone isn’t a narcissist but falls under another category?
Thanks loved ur videos
Shake is actually on my list, but my time is very limited and it depends whether I have a chance to loop back and do earlier seasons. I wish I had started the analyses years ago 😂
That's an interesting idea. I don't want to dilute from the message of the channel too much so probably won't do an entire video or series on a non-narcissist. But perhaps I could point out when people are showing highly empathetic behaviors.
Poor cole!
💔💔💔💔
Liar! she is disgusting to do that to a person in front of all those people!
Please do Jackelina from the new season!!!
Please do Scandoval!!