What We Wish We Knew About Sex Before We Got Married
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 4 ก.ค. 2024
- Sex is a beautiful gift from God given to a couple to enjoy within the confines of marriage. However, often times people don’t talk about what it takes to have a satisfying and fulfilling sex life in your marriage. Most often, people just assume and expect that everything will happen naturally and you won’t have to work at it. In this video, my wife Jennifer Parr and I will discuss some ways we’ve improved our intimacy and we suggest you implement in your marriage as well.
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Hey BEAT family! My uploading schedule got off by one day this week but I wanted to upload this before the weekend ended. My wife and I have been planning on doing some videos on marriage and relationships and here is one of the ones we shot recently. I hope you enjoy this IF it applies to where you are right now in your life.
Hopefully saved single listeners aren't too "footloose and fancy free" before marriage.
1 Corinthians 6:9-11 👑
"Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor sodomites, nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit the kingdom of God. And such were some of you. But you were washed, but you were sanctified, but you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus and by the Spirit of our God."
Like the video would like to see more like this. thanks for making a video like this , This will help a lot of marriages
“Spice It Up & Have A Good Time”!! 😂😂 You Guys did amazing speaking on this subject in a proper manner! Beautiful Couple! 🙏🏽
Thank y’all for this word.
I would love to see more videos on engagement and going from dating to being engaged to married , cause i dont see alot of videos on that process mainly on being single or married advice. loved this video❤️🙏🏾helped me to remember celibacy in my relationship and why God created sex in the first place
Just got engaged 2 weeks ago after dating for a year and a half. We are waiting! It is not easy but it will definitely be worth it!
Stay the course and wait; yes it will be worth it! God will keep you if you want to be kept.
Good for you! God will bless it! Much happiness and blessings on your marriage!
Has the wedding happened yet? We need an update! LOL
@@faithtvonline Not yet! The wedding is July 7th :) still staying strong!
@@nickdiso7031 That's great! 😊 I didn't know if you would respond. Do you have a wedding registry?
Rule 1 never stop dating rule 2 always tell them randomly how pretty and smart your wife is wives tell your husband how proud of them you are. Rule 3 don't wait for special days to get them a small gift.
As a wife l agree, sometimes we just want to receive but we also ought to spoil our husbands 🥰
@@PurposeDrivenWomen Hello true love is giving not receiving 😐
Rule 4: Use lube to prevent friction.
@@SwordTune why? Smh.
@@KW72Y For better safety, comfort, and pleasure. What did you think, that you could go in raw? No way.
This video made me cry. My husband and I have been married going on seven years, and I was saved about four months ago. He jumped on board shortly after. While our marriage has healed significantly (before I got saved, we each had one foot out the door), our sex life is still suffering. My biggest problem is I never get cuddles without him trying for more every single time. Sometimes I just want to be held without being expected to "perform". He shows love in other ways, but I'm sorely missing that emotional connection, and that part of your video really hit home. I'm going to have him watch this later. Please pray for us in this matter, and thank you for sharing these things! God bless!
Honestly it's just how men are programmed, if you have a woman that you are attracted to, the longer you hold and cuddle them, the more you want to do something, I say this as someone who heard the same exact thing from my wife saying that sometimes she wants to be held, but I always want to do something, as I can't help it
Honestly it gets me very mad when she says that, because I asked myself, why are married people always finding ways to not have sex, while single people getting it in all the time
Just like you said that is how men are programmed, women are also programmed a different way. I don't always want to feel like I need to do something just because I was touched.
🙏🙏🙏
@@SAAN27 but he should be able to respect her and her boundaries. You still need self control within the marriage. Not everything is about the man. It takes 2 not 1
It’s also the fact you get mad when your wife is being vulnerable with you. Makes me think you’re very manipulative
I feel you on this one. Married 30 yrs and :-( I pray that God brings you and your spouse through intact and praising Him.
This is great- an honest discussion on sex from a Christian couple done with real integrity. Bless you guys!
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I do think that singles and engaged people should watch this. It’s tasteful enough and done at a level high enough that you don’t get into the specific and cause lust or unneeded emotions but the point is still heard loud and clear. Very well done.
Your wife has such a respectful and kind tone in her voice/spirit. I need more of that. Sexuality is so important. Glad it can be talked about openly. Wish more churches could do the same.
This topic is a great one that needs to happen more often! B/c our sex life w/ kids, business, and ministry can play a huge toll on our marriage! Shoot TBH, I was upset today b/c my wife wasn’t in the mood! SMH… I had an attitude all day!! 😂🤦🏾♂️ Lawd help me!! Thank y’all for this video! I’ll try and talk with my wife tonight, instead of giving her the short-answer-silent treatment!! Y’all pray for us! 🙏🏾
Your wife speaks with so much grace. The light of Jesus is evident in her. God bless you both!
BEAUTIFULLY DONE! My 3 favorite take-aways: 1. Discern your season 2. Adjust your expectations to your season 3. Prioritize connecting with your spouse emotionally. ---Thank you both for this!
Single men let's gather here in the Lord as we wait for the next video 😅
This is definitely a video I can skip
Single and still waiting: but gives me plenty of time to grow spiritually and mentally
I am still single, but I will focus on growing both spiritually and mentally as a person by following God's Holy Word, and I am more than willing to wait until the Lord tells me when it is the right time for me to get married.
Don't forget us single sisters lol
@@OmegaX_2340 definitely
Pastor Allen your wife is so lovely! Not just her physical apperance but her sweet soft voice and caring heart shines through as she speaks! What a woman of God :) Thanks for this video!
As a single, this was very helpful to know. More topics on these things should be talked about in church because of all the temptations out there to think sex in marriage is not that great.
This was the cleanest discussion on sex in marriage. Really well done 🙏🏾
My first experience with sex was getting raped multiple times so I've had a lot that God has had to help me with in this area. Please pray for me that I can think purely in this area of my life because it's been a life long struggle for me. Thx 🙏
I am So sorry for what happened to you. I hope you have been in therapy. Please do not feel like anything is your fault. Don’t rush into any relationship. You need to heal first. Having friends is fine but no relationships until you heal. Therapy can help. I wish you all the best.
🥺♥️
🙏🙏🙏
We ask each other do you feel up to it. We never force each other for sex because we think something is going on. We talk about the reason why we don't feel like it. Communication is very important in a marriage or relationship.
1 Corinthians 7:5 "Do not deprive each other except perhaps by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control."
We have been married 40 years and we are happier without the sex.
@@ctucker7002 really ?
@@jollygoodgordon5580 Yes!
@@ctucker7002 Not in my 19 year marriage. Its basically a sexless marriage and its ruining our relationship.
@@ctucker7002 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Thanks Parr's, as a single, I felt that you all explained this with respect and tact. So many people including Christians don't know how to talk about the subject without being afraid or w/out going to far to seem cool. As a counselor I really appreciate this and will be sharing with my single girlfriends.
Please saints pray for me. I pray God give me strength to be delivered from lust of pornography indeed please. Thank you 🙏🏾 I fast, pray, then I find myself falling, but I feel like I’m on the edge of been delivered. I’m just sick of this, I regret opening that door
God is a deliverer. I will pray for you. Once you sincerely repent, take action, however you are accessing porn, but a block for those sites, go to the Word when you have the urge to go watch. Put it in God's hands.
God says in the Bible that He will not let you be tempted beyond your ability. You are able to stop. Do everything to flee from sin and if you become tempted, RESIST.
The Bible also says “Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.”
So submit to God, live for Him and pray, pray, pray.
Remember this: More prayer, more power; less prayer, less power; no prayer, no power.
I got you I know the feeling
In Jesus name you are free declare it over yourself in Jesus name!
Thank you so much! My wife seemed to lose all interest in sex after our third child was born. This has been difficult for me to deal with. Its really helpful to hear from a godly couple on this topic. God bless you both!
Through thick and thin. Also would suggest Christian based marriage and intimacy counseling
It's part of crucifying your flesh. Make sure you're supplying her needs and communicating. Children can overwhelm a woman! 🙏 If we're concerned or worried about things, it's hard to connect sexually. When my husband shows concern for me by listening, praying or sharing the load, it's easier for me to give more of myself.
@@mytreasuredcreations True love is giving not receiving😐 most of the break up and divorce happens because of you
Women
@@champion3859 Hey the second part of your comment is not true and inappropriate, not all break ups and divorces are because of women, men are to blame too.
@@JesusisKing538 I think she knows that though, she was just explaining her experience
Loved the discussion and seeing a healthy marriage portrayed. I think we need more of this to give people a good example to look up to. Thanks to you both!
Such a blessing 🙌. Yes, more please. This is so refreshing. Seeing teamwork being promoted in a God approved manner.
I have heard the term a million times "a beautiful spirit" and this woman has that. She is beautiful outside and inside. Thanks for sharing this video and allowing me to see what that concept looks like. Please do more couples videos.
Thank you both for this gift and shedding light on this topic. Please continue to do more of these. Forgetting the experiences of the past and not having unrealistic expectations of your spouse is huge!
I'm glad you brought up illness. It can really wipe out your sex life. Also, aging changes what you want, capability, and frequency. Men also have emotional needs: we are not machines.
Thank you so much! This is so needed. When you have no one to teach you these things and then you find your marriage in this space it's so hard to navigate or even understand what's going on. Thank you! Thank you! This is a blessing!
All those graduating soon from singleness... Gather here! 😂
Y’all lookin like my wife and I and we’re in our 20’s. Living a good spiritual life is good for the soul and body. Love you guys bro Allen.
Understanding the seasons of the marriage was so enlightening as it brings clarity to the changes we go through as a couple; childbirth, sickness, loss of parents, menopause, etc. Thank you for this video.
Amazing teaching, I’m sure very much needed. Why isn’t this taught more in church?🤷🏻♀️
@The Light Of Christ wrong! How can there be anything about life that shouldn’t be taught in church? I believe that is why there are so many misconceptions and dysfunctional marriages and families. These teachings do not have to be explicit, but we all need to know what God intended for all things
@The Light Of Christ why would is be in private when sex talk should be fore everyone as a single person I would want a church to talk about this topic with no shame . If it’s in the Bible it’s open to everyone. This is why this world is messed up because churches failed from the start . If only my catholic school taught me what god said about sex, I would’ve saved myself a lot of confusion and going down the wrong path . It would’ve been better if I knew WHY sex before marriage and sexual immorality was wrong . It’s not just a god telling us whst to do , there’s the spiritual part about it .
Thank you for taking the time to talk about this and encourage people in their marriages
Loved this! Thank you both! Me and my wife have been married 1 year and I would love to hear more from you guys!
This was beautiful, real, transparent and such a blessing! Thank you both for doing this video! God bless you! 😊🙏🏼
YES PLEASE!! Do some more videos on marriage/sex/family/parenting! This was great.
Can you do a video or two about friendships in married life? Boundries, finding other married couples, what's it like integrating children into that, etc
Thanks for talking about this very well. As a single Christian women that can wait on dating & is in no rush I really get uncomfortable with subjects like this but you both did great on explaining it so well in a godly-manner. Great teamwork to you both!
What a great video, I love that this is being discuss for married couples
Awesome teaching, been married 24 years following the Lord with my Husband. Amen.
Goodness, I love you guys a whole lot. I can’t handle all this christian cuteness overload. You guys complement each other so well. I’m beyond happy God brought you two together! You both radiate that Jesus glow 😩and are so beautiful on the inside and outside. I’m hoping that of these days you do a meet and greet 🤞. To God be all the glory!
Many marriages are in trouble due to nonsense and sin, and it can go on for years because of a lack of honesty and communication you need to do more on this brother Parr
Just loved listening to this. Straight to the point! Thank you both for being intentional about doing justice to this topic.
Perfect timing. This was extremely helpful, thanks for sharing and looking forward to more content! God bless you both.
Yea please! keep this topic and marriage going! This was really helpful to me as a married women . I love what your wife said about women desires changed and how we want to hear those affirmations from are husbands. This is that season I’m in so this was a blessing to me thank you!
That was AWESOME! Thanks so much. I enjoyed this topic. My husband and I have been married for 20 years. The seasons...OMG!!!! YES...That part was sooooo true.
Let's get it Parr family thank you touching on "The Gift," of marriage - we hear single people talking about it all the time but married church folks are like, "Hush up?" We have it backwards...thank you for the honest, transparent, and relevant exchange - we adore you and pray for your union, always!
Please do more videos. This was extremely helpful for our marriage.
More videos please! I really appreciate your openness and truth on this topic that is rarely discussed in church.
PLEASE keep doing these videos together. Alot of what was covered I'll admit I was not doing with my wife but listening to you guys I am changing that ASAP!
This was great! Yes, please do more videos on dating, marriage, etc. Thank you!
Beautiful union, great conversation! God bless you both.
Thank you both for sharing! We’re in our first year of marriage and this was so helpful!
Excellent dialogue!! This was very informative. I love hearing this from both perspectives.❤️
Cant thumbs up this video enough. Thank you for the transparency! My wife and I are two kids past the D.I.N.K stage. Everything you and your wife shared mirrors us to a T! Oh and the comment about comparisons between married sex vs single sex was spot on and timely. You've convicted this D.I.W.K (Dual Income With Kids) husband to think more outside himself and more about the needs of my Mrs!
What a great video! The church needs to talk about this more!
Thank you Allen and Jennifer for this honest and transparent discussion of a challenging topic. This was very well handled.
For those who are still unmarried, no matter how awkward it feels, have these discussions before you get married. Put ALL of you cards on the table. DO not hold back reservations, concerns, and your honest feelings about sex and the various facets involved. Know what each of you expects and why before you join yourself together in marriage. Make sure that you are on the same page before you marry, and do not let anyone rush you. Marriage is a beautiful union and is only spoiled when rushed into. Take the time, and invest it to ensure the best start and marriage you can have.
This was great. I love the marriage talk. Been married for a little under a year and the unmet expectations part, that hit real hard.
Married couples will not tell you entire truth about this subject because they do not want to offend. But sex gets less. Lol
Love this! Will watch again with my husband. 🙏❤️
I needed this more than I knew! Thank you all. To God be the glory!!!!
Would love to hear more from you guys on this topic! Very well said and communicated 🙌🏿. God bless y'all and your beautiful family 🙏🏿
Amazing topic!! I have been married for 13 years and can't say enough how important sex is for our relationship! Thank you!
Do more of these. I agree with everything you said. I’m gonna share this with my wife.
Thank you so much for this video it is refreshing to have you both talk about a subject that is rarely talked about however it is a highly needed subject to be talked about. as a wife i have a high dire for my husband however i fall asleep often before anything so i was worried something was wrong thank you for talking about this and helping ease my mind about this. please make more videos!!
Keep it up! Love the conversation as we transition into parenthood!
My wife and I love this, you two. We will be placing this on our website as a resource to encourage others.
I'm late with this, but thank you guys for being so open and sharing your experience!
This is a great conversation!!! Thanks for this. Can we hear from couples where the wife’s sex drive is high and the husband’s sex drive is low? I can only find conversations where the man wants more sex, but I’m a wife that wants more sex.
Love it when Mrs Parr is here 🥰
Definitely one of the better, more realistic talks I've heard on health sex in marriage! Its a struggle.
Y' all are doing great. Thank you for sharing! I think we can ALL relate to all this TRUTH.
Great video guys. Communication is very vital in the success of marriage.
Great video and super informative for married couples. Hopefully to see more of these vids in future.
Was a bit scared and sceptical with the title but you've brought up some very valuable points there, it's great indeed to talk about those things instead of letting Jada Smith or others woke christians influence godly couples. Married nearly 2 decades we need remember and cherish what Yahuah intended our married relationship to be, and maintain. Thank you guys and please don't hesitate to come with more content like this. God bless you
Please do more of these 🙏🏽 thank you guys so much
What a great video on a much-needed topic. God bless you both and thank you for sharing with us ❤️
Yes! Definitely do more videos together on marriage, etc…
This was a good one. Thank You! Blessings to you and the Mrs.
My wife getting affection soon as come into the door. I want her to know I am always ready. Plus just being physical throughout the day even if you don’t strike gold every night it’s nice to continually show affection. Communication is beyond underrated though tough conversations you have to be strong.
Good stuff!!! Seasons is a key for how best to approach this often "not talked about topic"... in many circles...Thanks, Allen and Jennifer
Such an awesome video! probably the best one I’ve ever seen on this subject.
This is good! Thank you for sharing me and my wife am coming into our second year of marriage also residing in DFW. This is a conversation that we even discuss now without children yet.
Just watched this..Wonderful video Pastor Parr. You and your wife did an incredible job with this subject. Please, please do more of these videos with your bride.
Wow!!! This was soooo good....thank you for this and being sooooo transparent
Such a good video!! Thank you both of you!🎉 and praise be to God for giving you the gift of speaking on this topic.
Very wise advice! Thank yall! Yes more marriage content would be great! 🤗
Great,
Will have to wait for my wife we watch together tomorrow after Church.
Thank you I needed to hear this as a Christian in a marriage. Do more videos!
Beautiful, Authentic Couple With Sound Advice, Scripturally Based with Personal Examples. Definitely do more Videos 📸. This may be the start of another segment of Ministry for you guys ❤️!
Hello Parr family, great video! Keep the marriage relationship videos coming!!
Excellent, thank you both, yes please to more marriage and other relationships guidance 👏🏻❤️
Great video. This is some good info. I Wish I had this video 5 years ago when I first got married. We learned by experience but God and therapy got us through!
This is so brave and honorable by the Parr family.
Not married anymore, but I can get tips for my next marriage. You as a married couple put out good information. Its helpful.
I want to help other married couples in our church and I will surely be tuning in to your messages regarding this topic.
Yes, do more videos together. You both feed off of each other. Love the transparency, yet not too personal.
What a wonderful way to present what God has intended. Your wife is absolutely adorable. You should be proud.
Appreciate the candid conversation. Good message 👏
Beautiful...😍 On point. May our Lord continue to use you guys. Blessings to you & your home Man of God.
Perfect conversation, kudos to y’all 😌
This is something I definitely needed to hear. Ty!👍🏼
Thank you for your ministry and addressing this topic for Christian couples. I am currently struggling with a sexless marriage going on into its fourth year. I am well aware of some of the pitfalls you mentioned. I pray that this message would bless other marriages and provide them with hope and encouragement. I look forward to your next video with your wife.🙏🏿
Wow, that was deeply honest, thank you for sharing that! I pray that you & your spouse will overcome your issues & reunite in terms of your intimate relations.
4 years in a sexless marriage?!...Please communicate this is Soo Abnormal and No this is not the marriage I intend to have