5 Code Words Narcissists Use: What They Really Mean
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 4 พ.ค. 2024
- 5 Code Words Narcissists Use: What They Really Mean. In this video, learn about the 5 code words narcissists use and what they really mean. Understanding these code words can help you recognize and protect yourself from narcissistic abuse.
Have you ever found yourself in a conversation with a narcissist and felt like you were speaking a different language?
Well, in a way, you actually are.
That's because they have their own set of code words they use. But little did you know that they're actually using them to manipulate, control, and deceive you.
And in this video, we'll reveal the top code words used by narcissists and what they really mean.
Before that, let's dive into the world of narcissism.
Chances are we know someone who fits the definition of a narcissist. We're talking about someone who's arrogant, entitled, and always thinks that they're right. And as you talk to them, you'll notice that they seem to have a different way of speaking, like they're speaking in code.
What most people don't realize is that narcissists use specific code words to gaslight their victims and maintain their power. So now, let's break down these five of these sets of code words and expose the narcissist's true intentions in saying them.
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#psychologyelement #narcissism #narcissiticabuse
1. It's for your good
2. That's not what I meant
3. No one else thinks that
4. I'm just kidding
5. You're just being too sensitive
6. I'm just trying to help.
7. That's not how I would see/do that.
8. I never said that.
9. You're so needy.
10. You're not my parent, I don't owe you an explanation.
Heard them all.
11. It was just a joke!
You take life too seriously.
12. You only think you said something, you never said it, you only thought it.
Great video, I was in a beautiful marriage before my now ex wife left me,i still love her and most times i cant stop thinking about her, i am doing my very best to get rid of the thought of her, but i just cant, i love her so much, i dont know why i am bring this here for, i cant stop thinking about her
its always difficult to let go of you love, i was in a similar situation my wife for 12 years left me.i couldnt just let her gsomeone o i did all i could to get her back, i had to seek the help of a spiritual adviser who helped me bring her back
wow, how did you get a spiritual adviser, and how do i reach her?
Her name is Shelly renee white , and she is a great spiritual counselor who can bring back your ex.
Thank you for this valuable information, i just looked her up now online. impressive.
15, You made me do it or treat you the way I do
16.You are confused I have no idea where you got that idea
I once told a narcissist this: “Until you admit that you have been manipulative, I will never agree with you or ever say that you are right about anything.” He went into tears.😢 It was one of the most entertaining and gratifying moments of my life. 😆🤪
😂😂😂😂
Ive been being harassed for years by these people. Its a nightmare. No empathy just irritation.
Every word i say turns into drama
This really reminds me of my 1st wife. And using her Christianity as a tool to control me and others. The worst years of my life. Since 2004 a free man.
The absolute worst is a 'religious' narcissist. They are pretending to be a Christian.
Ah, the religious narcs - especially the covert ones - I think they're the worst.
I met a guy online who introduced himself as Aiden. We really hit it off & eventually met up when I traveled to his city to visit my best friend. When we finally met & I called him by his name “Aiden” he told me, “there must be some confusion, my name is ___________.” (I won’t put his real name because I try to not let it be part of my vocabulary.) So his name was not Aiden & he corrected me by telling me that I was confused about his name. I was so dumbstruck & immediately questioned my reality like maybe I really did misunderstand what he told me his name was. It was gaslighting at its finest & at the time I didn’t even know there was a legit term for what he was doing. The relationship between he & I went on much longer than it should have. I remember the first time we had a fight about something that he did he acknowledged it with these words, “well, I’m sorry you feel that way, but…” & then went on to insinuate that the problem wasn’t his actions, the problem was how I felt about his actions. I cannot believe these monsters walk this earth & breathe the same air as those of us with good intentions do. Good riddance!
I belief they are demons or have demons in them.
Unfortunately my father is the biggest narcissist you could ever meet.
That's horrible. There certainly seem to be more narcissists than non-narcissists these days . . . because we've finally been educated about them.
They also ask lots of stupid questions, like "what do you mean?" or "what does that have to do with anything?"
they have problems with thinking, vocabulary and emotions, they are like a toddler in kindergarten who is nagging and jealous and wants to stand out.
6.) "It's really not always about you."
7) Get over it.
Rawr!
Rawr is I love you in dinosaur
“That’s not what I INTENDED”. My covert narc mother thinks “intending to” do something is the same as actually doing things.
If it involves emotion.. this makes sense... if you hurt someone with your actions or words but didn't mean to.. then that's not what they intended right?
I’ll give you an example: I crashed into a gasoline tanker which sank and I was badly injured needing surgery and lots of recovery. My Mom never even asked how I was doing or if she could help me in any way, she just said she “intends the very best for me” and “I have her best intentions”. Regarding the legal matter surrounding the collision rather asking how I’m doing mentally with litigating against monsters she just says “she intends the best resolution” which means she hopes I get a bunch of money she can find a way to have access to (ain’t gonna happen). What I needed was a mother to take care of me, not someone to “intend” the best via text message.
@@fakename8856
Good God wow yea I see what you mean. She is dysfunctional. You are right.
I have very very similar fkd up parents. Do not give her one single red cent.
Also how did you crash into a tanker?? Is that a true story? Are you a merchant ship captain?
Our ex friend called his girlfriend the worst name anyone can call a woman over a game of cards. I was across from her and our jaws dropped. My husband finally said something like “ there’s no need for that”. He told my husband the next day, “she knew I was just kidding”. He said no one says those words “ just kidding!”. We stopped the games after that. And then dropped their friendship.
That's awful.
@@msjannd4 the woman is still with that idiot. He sweet talked her into moving in shortly after they met- you won't have to pay rent, get new furniture, or even clean (he has a housekeeper). She fell for it, hook line and sinker. Shortly after, when at our house for the card games, she saw our extra bedroom and said, see, they have an extra room if she needed to stay here. I was confused at first and said, "of course you could stay here". He must have said to her, "now you have nowhere else to go". Unbelievable. To tell her you can move in and be all sweet and then say, you have nowhere else to go is the epitome of manipulation. She's been with him 10 years. She likes not paying for things...but for your dignity? Even a friend of hers asked if "his behavior bothers her". She said "no". Then he got kicked out of our local bar we all went to for trivia, because of how nasty he was to various staff members (all female) over time. She cried. What 60 something year old man gets kicked out of a sports bar? He doesn't even drink! No great loss for us, in fact, it was a gain!
I've heard all of these from my daughter. I was told that I was out of touch with the now, I was non essential, my opinion didn't matter. Yea, I went silent then was accused of being noncommunicative.
I was just trying to help. It's not my fault. I didn't do anything wrong. You made me. Blah, blah, blah. It gets old.
My narcissist ex always said I’m sorry you feel that way anytime I expressed something that she didn’t agree with.
My sister used to say that
This video brought up old memories I longed forgot about
Good video at listing the warnings of unpleasant individuals. Beware of vicious people!
I subscribed. Gas lighting is often used by narcissists. Thank you, Rebecca, Your words of guidance are awesome, I couldn't have said it better myself.
the one that opened my eyes used to tell me that she was the only person who loves me, and concerned that i would mess that up, since no one else did
How despicable, its quite telling that they would say something like that because they can't picture someone loving themselves and not taking advantage of others for their own benefit within the process. You will find others who love you for who you are as long as you embrace and accept who you are, allow the most authentic version of yourself to be accepted by others with the same care and respect you have for yourself. Screw that jackass, they knew you deserved better and had no problem telling you a lie to convince you otherwise because they knew if you weren't convinced you would go find better which is someone and something they never planned on being. You DO deserve better and you should strive to accept better and treat yourself how you desire to be treated.
@@DeeDeeRatchford right on dee dee, I really appreciate this reply you shared with me, guess what? You deserve the best life has to offer yourself, when we say things, those things can come to present, for both speaker/s or listener/s alike, I will correctly say, thank you for your blessings and positive energy, regards
@@g-dcomplex1609 Aw thank you, you’re so kind, I’m sure we both will receive the blessings we deserve as we try our best to contribute into making the earth a better place as we go on this journey to becoming the best version of ourselves ❣️
@@g-dcomplex1609 I don’t know why TH-cam deleted my reply but I wish the same luck to you, your reply is very much appreciated❣️
“thats NOT what I meant”….but thats what i always say to the narc, because he twists MY words. THE NARC is the one who misinterpreting, theyre twisting your words…so ITS THE NARC who is bein told, “Thats not what i meant”.
This video is very relatable !
My sister is a narcissist and patronising she use the phrase good girl I'm 62 for god sake! She brags about how much she has and rubs it in my face if I can't afford something! She also buys the cheapest gifts possible! Yet she is dripping in gold and diamonds! I'd rather live the way I do! Than be like her. She is sneaky and vindictive. She instigates trouble then watches it happen with a smirk on her face!
man that first one is my mom's favorite. actually all of these
Ive been hurt by many different narcissists. Online and offline.
I have anxiety now and never used to.
Don't let them have power over you. Get away from them and watch the magic of new friends coming in. Analyze the narcissists so you are more aware of the behavior so you can avoid it happening again. I got rid of several narcissist friends and I was afraid I'd never meet new friends, but sure enough I met better, smarter, higher quality, more caring people to hang out with. And don't hang on to friends who de-value you and what you do for a living.
@@BeYounique...Maryanne I am. Seems like it takes forever to meet new good friends though. I live in a small district
@@dark7angel456 You will though. I also live in a small town. I wanted new friends for a very long time and felt like there was something wrong with me. (I have an amazing husband, but I wanted girlfriends too. One of my best friends was a guy who was like a brother to me, and he died during the pandemic). Then, bang, all at once, my calendar is now filled with lunch dates with cool women I can relate to. It's like when you look for a new job and you can't find anything, then all at once all the companies start calling.
YOU'RE NOT CRAZY YOU WERE ABUSED
People often see the victim of narcissistic abuse as "crazy" or dramatic.
They seem unstable, imbalanced, and full of fear and doubt. They are angry, depressed, and sometimes lash out. They are experiencing overwhelming emotions, and probably wearing them on their sleeve, for all to see.
While the narcissist shows up cool, calm, and collected. Cruel and heartless as they are, they remain stable, because they were never attached to their victim.
So using, abusing, and then casting them aside, didn't mean anything. because they don't care.YOU'RE NOT CRAZY YOU WERE ABUSED
People often see the victim of narcissistic abuse as "crazy" or dramatic.
They seem unstable, imbalanced, and full of fear and doubt. They are angry, depressed, and sometimes lash out. They are experiencing overwhelming emotions, and probably wearing them on their sleeve, for all to see.
While the narcissist shows up cool, calm, and collected. Cruel and heartless as they are, they remain stable, because they were never attached to their victim.
So using, abusing, and then casting them aside, didn't mean anything. because they don't care.
Also note who the narcissists are friends with. The friends I've had who were narcissists had bully friends who hurt and put me down just like they did (though they were a bit more sneaky in their hurtfulness). That's a big red flag I should have realized years ago. Now that all these people are out of my life I feel so relieved. It's so true, "You are who your friends are"!
@@BeYounique...Maryanne Yes!
Remember, if you truly believe you are dealing with a narcissist:
YOU MUST BE SERIOUS!
YOU MUST BE ULTRA SENSITIVE!
YOU MUST BE MOCKING!
YOU MUST BE DOMINATE!
YOU MUST BE FIRM IN YOUR PRIDE!
YOU MUST BE IMPERTINENT!
YOU MUST BE IN CONTROL!
YOU MUST BE RIGHT!
YOU MUST BE BOLD!
It may seem awkward and mean. But, if you leave out any one of the above,
THEY GOT YOU‼️😳
They refuse to answer questions. I was told I didn't deserve answers. I was told I wasn't human. They need to be held accountable for the pain and the suffering they cause
My husband was having a cookout at his job. I offered to make potatoe salad and he said no I'm good. I said well,maybe someone else would like some. He said no I'll just bring some chips with me, personal little baggie. I said well it's not about just you, your boss is good enough to provide the hamburgers and buns and other stuff. He said no it doesn't matter to me I'm good. It was obvious by the 3rd time that the only thing that mattered was his wants and needs, no one else was considered. This is just one example of many throughout the years. It's exhausting, to say the least.
"You are just imagining things/it's all in your fantasy" when getting confronted
"a man needs to..." - Making general statements how someone should act or react
"You are very special with me and I want you to always know we got a special bond" - Not only narcistic people use this, but they abuse it in a manipulative way without meaning it
Pressuring you to make agreements etc. while you feel uncomfortable, often in a pushy, authoritan way you don't dare to reject
"I did everything/so much for you" - They say this in order to use it against you. They use it so you play down their own mistakes, because you end up weighing what they did positively vs what they did negatively, so you don't want to judge them badly overall
and anything that does take any credibility of you as a person, such as not taking you serious, but much rather giving you labels such as being crazy. They do this in order to distract from their own mistakes
OMG you just 100% described my zEX, were you peeking in the windows?! Creepy.
For myself, I found my power through spirituality (not religion). Knowing who you are, and what you stand for. Not being a people-pleaser, but rather express who you are, even if it means walking alone. Drop the toxic people and find your tribe.
My mom was a narrisstic. I got sick of her crap. I called her out and then threw her out of my house when she started taking over and trying to run my household.
This is fantastic
To some it is a common game they , enjoy playing .
This is my mother to a tee.
My father to a tee.
After I went no contact with my covert narc mother she'd leave messages saying she was really worried and please call so she didn't have to worry. What she really meant is I'm having a problem processing emotions about how I treated you last time we spoke and it's you're responsibility to call me and tell me it didn't matter so I can feel better than you.
I did subscribe thank you for your great content❤
My narcissistic son always says: That never happened when you confront him about something he said.
Omg😊.
You are bang on.
E.g. NOUN. Get a Merriam Webster, you implement a Linked List from the original noun, that sort of terminates, the Linked List terminates when an "oily" concept is reached as a "leaf." Oily meaning sexual...
Thanks
They usually start with the word " I ". You know how " I " feel.
What you need is three engine-components: *A.* plenty of interview footage, *B.* an initially empty dictionary of size unbounded, *C.* an engine that searches for "semantics" which, as the dictionary grows in size, will perform faster and faster, approaching trivially fast.
I have a gut feeling everyday, about being manipulated, so many thing point to a big discard, cause of all the moving money out of state. Motorhome fully loaded with his stuff. I am not aloud to go. And text message sent to daughter. 2018 was going have paint rooms still waiting. Everything he is doing is none of the things I asked of him. 8 years abuse in all forms. Arrested twice for DV. Both times came back lack of evidence
Call ya crazy lol 😂🎉❤❤❤
Helpful video. Thank-you. How about when you say no to not needing something and they try to give it to you and when you tell the person I don’t need that they come back with a reply of “I was just trying to make it easier for you.” I replied if I wanted the thing I would have said yes to it but I said no !
Very use
I just walk away and ignore them.
I subscribed 👍
Number one code word they use is narcissist lol
Omg, we are 10s
Exactly 👍
*Dictionary* vital here. Vital. Insert the words "climate," "climate change," "fossil," "fossil fuel," "car." :))
Exactly
I subscribed
I’m the youngest of six. My dad died when we were kids. My oldest sibling is a textbook narcissist. My mother remarried to the direct opposite of my dad. He was violent and abusive, a controlling malignant narcissist. What scares me is that I seem to attract them or be attracted to them. I’m totally celibate. Wont even date because I’m so afraid of getting involved with another narcissist. Is there any way out of this recurring nightmare?
This was my ex, he lived to put me down, gas light, humiliate me.. and then say I was the problem
My hubby has said most of these 😆
How about “you shouldn’t feel that way”
Everyone I don’t like is a narcissist
I got, I was only joking alot
Seeking validation from others on the outfit that you're wearing, is a big mistake. Fishing for compliments is so unattractive. 🚫🎣
My E would tell me sfter someone complemented me, Oh, thats just a pitty complement, they feel bad you wore that in public, first few times he did thst .i was like Whaaat??,then Inlesrned to ignore him,he jyst simmer!
Every single human being on earth does or says those things…are you trying to gaslight me?
"I was just joking."
YOU'RE BEING TOO sensitive
Very manipulative
Pushing boundaries
He was disgusting
I have never said any of these things and my wife's so called councillor labelled me a narcissist and now that is all I hear.So please be sure before you paint all men the same color Narcissist Blue!!!🇨🇦😰
Perhaps the councilor was a narcissist. I've had narcissists call me a narcissist. They tend to throw the word around. And if you call them on it, of course they'll twist it and say they didn't say that and then say something worse. It's a never ending battle that a normal person can't win. If you're losing, you're not the narcissist. :)
@@BeYounique...Maryanne thank-you for this kind advice !
@@RobertSkene-qw3ob My pleasure! I wish you the best. :)
Those kids would not be good company for you mother said... hidding the fact I was an illegitimate child from an adulterous relationship before Roe vs Wade.
YOU'RE NOT CRAZY YOU WERE ABUSED
People often see the victim of narcissistic abuse as "crazy" or dramatic.
They seem unstable, imbalanced, and full of fear and doubt. They are angry, depressed, and sometimes lash out. They are experiencing overwhelming emotions, and probably wearing them on their sleeve, for all to see.
While the narcissist shows up cool, calm, and collected. Cruel and heartless as they are, they remain stable, because they were never attached to their victim.
So using, abusing, and then casting them aside, didn't mean anything. because they don't care.
Went right into 3 failed marriages and being a Prodigal Son... Psalm 139 1-16
The dress example is not a good one. Speaking the truth may be insulting, so if you can't handle it then dont ask. Some people need to constantly hear positive things like that from their partner even if it isn't based in truth. I prefer not to live in la la land where people give each other fake compliments. Too many fragile feelings to worry about out there. Just say it how you see it and move on.
That's true, but you can say it in a nice way. Last night my sister had a beautiful outfit on and she covered it up with a heavy red jacket. I told her once, "Take the jacket off" for the photo. She said, "I want to leave the jacket on." I didn't argue with her. I made my point, but wasn't mean about it because ultimately she wasn't put here to please me. Truth doesn't have to be insulting. But also remember whose truth is it? Everyone sees things differently.
Who is assessing the other persons motives...the first point is about "deceiving" be fani g interest or concern. Obviously these are positive qualities. How are you assessing their motives? Then the "it is not what I meant or said" is simply a means of gaslighting. Bs...not a person reading this has not had a discussion to clarify what they truly said and meant....it that conversation never takes place you have zero communication and therefore no actual relationship. Don't assume the other is evil in disguise...you'll always find a way to prove yourself right (and therefore everyone else wrong....which is what narcissistim is!). Don't be one what you are afraid of letting into your life. You don't know everything or effectively communicate your intentions either. Give people a chance to prove they aren't a serial killer, rapist, narcissist, schovinist or any other 5 minute diagnosis you would resent being categorized into either. Respect, or God forbid, caring and considerate love...if it's not worth the sacrifice for you, why should it be for them?
Should I let my girlfriend know I know?
Run and save yourself
not if they provide reasons why they said it. All the sentences above normally used by parents on their kids mixing with the wrong group and dressing sexily out party. this video seems like a video for rebellious kids instead of pointing out why these sentences are narcissistic. don't tell me you never said 'that's not what i meant' before?
What she's saying by "That's not what I mean" is that narcissists speak in riddles. Non-narcissists say exactly what they mean. They don't give "read between the lines" vibes. Non-narcissists are honest and not out to hurt people. I'm not a mom, but I was a baby-sitter for a little girl for a year. Not once did I have to say, "That's not what I meant." And there was a short period she was difficult and challenging, but she knew the boundaries. I didn't have to reinstate what I meant. I loved the kid as if she was my own and there were no communication problems.
Why Do Narcissists Love Religion😯
I think people who are prey to narcissists should pay attention to red flags and use discernment to not repeat the cycle of getting caught in the web of another toxic narcissistic relationship but I think this Video sides far too much with the narcissist and makes me wonder if the person conducting this video is a narcissist. Coverts are very difficult to detect and people should run when the red flags surface but kindness - understanding - empathy are what good people are made of that try to make relationships work and there are people damaged from their past many don’t see that developed to be a narcissist. I don’t condemn the message entirely of this video it’s just that in hearing hundreds this one kind of pisses me off in elevating the narcissists behavior over the victim of abuse.
no. you are not crazy, they cut you down any chance they get and beg sympathy from others cuz they have to put up w you, it would hurt too much if they left ( before they take all your money, self-respect and secrets).. when they do finally go they wont come back, they took everything and striped you of all decency so get cozy in a homeless shelter if you can find one
ROCKING A DRESS????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
DAMN YANKIE TALK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
What are you 😅
Women can be narcissistic
Absolutely! Out of all the narcissists I know, only one was a man, the rest were women.
Yes, narcissism is part of a list of borderline personality disorders (BPD) and is mostly found with women. In my personal experience, one was a male friend of mine and the other was female. (Lucky me) 😂
@@BeYounique...Maryanne where are U from girl
It isn't M.L. until the Dictionary is fairly huge.
That's an approx.
Too much ai and stock footage. Cannot watch.
Scorpio male ♏️ 😮yeah! True Dat! I couldn't understand dumbass language!!
Not good examples