You Probably Know A Narcissist (here’s how to spot them)
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 24 ก.พ. 2019
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There are people in this world that are looking to take advantage of you. Many of these signs are subtle and take a trained eye to catch them.
Today we will dive into the mind of a narcissist so you can learn what signs to look out for when meeting someone.
⏰TIMESTAMPS⏰
1:23 - Sign #1: Obsessed With Their Image
1:56 - Sign #2: Lie About Ridiculous Things
3:27 - Sign #3: Different Relationship With Lying
7:03 - Sign #4: They Don’t Give Up On Their Lies
8:32 - Sign #5: They Will Dismiss You
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#Narcissist #CharismaOnCommand #SelfDevelopment
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- แนวปฏิบัติและการใช้ชีวิต
When a narcissist can no longer control you, they will instead try to control how others see you.
YooTooBur what’s the definition of narcissist
you must of suffered from one! its happening to me right now
Holy shit that literlly just happened to me like a month ago. She was running around telling people bullshit about what i apparently said...
YooTooBur
So, so, true.
YooTooBur - This happened to be with a narcissist close family member. She was cruel and spiteful to me in every way that she could be without being found out and ruining her image. One thing she would do is to go behind my back and tell lies to friends, partners - and worst of all - my kids! She cost me friends, jobs and relationships, etc. It's not just what narcissists do to your face - it's what they go behind your back and do!!!
anyone else extremely creeped out by elizabeth's eyes ?
She looks glossed over
Me
Azalia Ashlee I am a horror fan so freaking me out is not that easy. However, this woman scares me. Those eyes 😳...
I think the NSA sent the Bionic Woman after Elizabeth because she is a fembot, not a real human :)
Gleeming eyes that stare through you to make you feel spoken down to
The thing I picked up on in life is that they treat strangers like friends and their closest family like enemies, even on trivial matters.
👏🏼 👏🏼 👏🏼
I've now started to realize that my brother likely is a narcissist and indeed the difference between how treats our cousins or other relatives/family friends, and how he treats me is wild. I'm sometimes just looking at him like "is that the same person??". There are also differences in how he treats each family member, I seem to be at the bottom of the list and our dad is the only one he actually respects to some extent, the difference between our dad and the rest of us is pretty big too.
Wow, that is exactly my experience. Thanks for putting it into words.
@@jamesshoemaker5105 So close to my situation, too.
Truth ✨💞
Narcissists are often so likeable and such a pleasure to be around that its as if they radiate an energy that you can't help but be drawn to. They often surround themselves only with complete strangers or aquantnances because long time friends have all seen past the charisma and lies. And narcissists will not take criticism from anyone, no matter how close of a relationship they have with the person that is criticizing them.
THIS! Omg.. You just solidified this for me. I know your comment is from 10 months ago, but it's timeless for a narcissist AND for one who is afraid they will show up at their door, who did so before as if all the horrible things they did were bygones because..."they were suffering" and now it was the real deal and it only now because of it. "let's put the past behind us" with their hand out, because everyone else won't.
@tungstenanderson5991 yup. Narcissists will constantly try to bring others into their sphere. They completely lack the ability to feel good about themselves, so they need external validation to prove their own self worth. They will be desperate in their attempts at that. With people that have left their sphere they will say things like "You never care about me" or "I always put you first but you never appreciate it" in order to bring them back. They are master manipulators and they will make you feel responsible for their emotions even when you have done nothing wrong. The best way to deal with them is to set boundaries and stand up for yourself. Don't be fooled by them.
Unless the people they keep close are agreeable, have poor self esteem, and try hard to please people.
In the DSM this is often described as "superficial charm." It doesn't work on people with even a little autism, because they dig for details and will ignore the social consequences of looking weird asking awkward questions.
@@mattheusser1390 There's no such thing as "a little autism" btw.
“A narcissist is the hero and victim of every story they tell” - Brian Callen.
Don't let this distract you from the fact that I get bullied because my classmates think my videos are the worst. Please don't agree, dear cris
I just thought i was cracked at telling stories
Can I get a quote source for this?
@@AxxLAfriku I did not expect to see you here. Hello!
Trump
I used to be a narcissist, but now I’m perfect.
Good one! LOL
That’s the most narcissist thing I ever heard
Nobody is perfect. Nothing is. So you're pretty much anything but. That's what makes you a narcissist. You could be excellent, but you'd rather be fiction.
@@Krystalmyth r/whoooooosh
Krystal Myth dude. over analyzing. they’re making a joke. 🙄🤦🏼♀️
My childhood best friend was a narcissist and I was the best man at his wedding to a woman I knew he was cheating on. I decided to completely cut him out of my life when I was 25 and I’m 44 now. I remember the first time I heard someone referred to as “toxic” and I immediately knew what they meant because I had front row seats to toxic for years and years. Just found out through my sister that he fraudulently took out a mortgage in his sister’s name and took her credit score down to the 300’s and she’s so afraid of what he’s capable of she’s super hesitant to escalate the issue. This video checked every box for that dude. He drives a Lamborghini or Ferrari from what my sister told me because he’s so obsessed with how he’s perceived. Keeping that dude as a best friend would have been awful for my life and the past 20 years have been awesome because I made so many rad friends.
You dodged a huge bullet that not so many people are fortunate enough to dodge.
Why didn't you tell that poor woman that she was being cheated on? You could've saved her years of misery.
@@zoilalulu3798 I should have but she was a pretty awful person too.
@@mahoney1360 wait so you didn't tell her because you thought she deserved it? Damn. She must have been a really awful person.
@@rcmpoffdayintah4738 if I was a better and stronger person at the time I would have said something
Advice to anyone dealing with a narc... don't expend any energy trying to understand them or why they say or do the things they do. It isn't logical, it will never make sense. They don't think like a human being. The don't reason like one and they have ZERO and I mean ZERO ability to accept accountability or feel remorse.
Well said. It applies to the one we have in our family.
While I'll agree with some things you said such as, they take zero accountability or have zero remorse. After many years of researching narsisism, I've learned many of the possible reasons they do all that they do. There have been leaps and bounds of knowledge as to why. However, while every narsisit is different, the do a lot of similar things and the "why" is far too difficult for me to explain. May I highly suggest Watching Dr. Sam Vaknin's videos here on TH-cam. He has more videos than anyone on the topic and I would consider him an expert. He comes across a little strange or excentric but his content is mostly spot on.
True!👍👍
Thank you for this, i was tryna understand an ex friend who’s a sociopath who i suspect to be a narc bc they rejected me for denying a diagnosis i had for a “quirky” neurodevelopmental disorder. its so sick and weird how obsessed they were about the fact that my brain and theirs are wired differently, they were so obsessed that they tried to force me in current labels i disagree w/ till i had enough.
Her forced "deep" voice was really annoying to me.
Me, too. It's very unattractive and ugly. I know lots of women with naturally deep voices that sound fine. But her deep voice is bizarre.
Yeah very strange.
It was creepy to me. Like legitimately freaked me out.
It sounded almost like how it sounds when you lower the pitch of someone's voice in Audacity or something. Very weird.
It reminded me of the chick from house bunny that said "I gotta go drop off some timber" lmao
She actually seems inhuman. Her eyes make me freak the hell out.
Alex Kammeraad only now that You’ve read the truth. Prior to that you, like everyone, would have fallen for it.
@@kenrehill8775 Not everyone else she would of got away with it. Some people can tell and read people better then others it's just the way it is. It's the same why some people still fall for the simplest scams and others never fall for them.
It’s called the crazy eyes. If a woman has the crazy eyes, SHE IS CRAZY. There is no exception.
“Sanpaku eyes”
Alex Kammeraad isn't it because of her makeup and the shape of eyelids?
It’s so funny when you’re used to this and see it very quickly. Not every narcissist is “good” at it
Yeah, sometimes you've just got to get away and shake your head and laugh.
my narc ex friend thought they could manipulate me but Nope, my dad is a narc so i can see all the bs lol😂
@@TheMazinoz wish I had !!!
For narcissists and sociopaths, not being caught lying is the same as having told the truth.
VERY interesting way to put it. Does that insight come from experience, research, or both? In your opinion: Say a narcissist is put on trial for a crime and is guilty. In the narcissist's mind, would being acquitted by a jury be the same as being actually not guilty? I'm dealing with a coworker that I firmly believe is a narcissist. He was on trial for something pretty heinous, but was ultimately found not guilty. Some research reveals that everyone,100% without question, that commits that crime is a narcissist.
I'm deliberating courses of action and have to be sure.
My father lies but does it in such a way that he convinces himself he has the right to. It’s as though if he can find a way to make a lie sound plausible, he’s earned the right to that version and will defend that lie with his full chest. Donald Trump does the same thing. It’s sad really.
Frankly I don't think they care either way, it only matters to them that you've been faked out into believing them, they know they're lying 99% of what comes out of their mouths is pure BS, their only care is being able to manipulate everyone around them
You missed the most important part: she looks like she's trying to peel your damn skin off with her eyes
The first thing I wondered is, 'OMG, what are her parents like?' Then I found out her father was the Vice President of Enron....
@@jenniferlawrence9473 For every failed or crazed kid, just look at the parents
superharry1 I don’t know who this lady is before this video but she scares the shit out of me
You are correct. I grew up in a church that was considered a cult. Very hard to break free from.
One thing that I have learned is that the eye's don't lie. However.... really good con artists know this, so if they can't lie to you with their eye's, witch is damn near impossible, they will "stiffen " them up, or fix them on one point, so that they don't accidentally give them selves away with little micro expressions.
cherese platt Wow. That's nuts. 🥜
One thing I notice about narcissists: when they initially see that you have something they want they can't hide their intense jealousy.
@@viracocha Yes we do, but we're rational enough to understand that every dog has its day. Narcissists on the other hand can't wrap their head around this concept.
@Brittany Bennett Okay, I'll concede to it being more from personal experience. I just never saw such envy on someone's face as when I saw the two narcs in my life react to me on a date with my then fiancee.
@Brittany Bennett I think they're narcissists. A lack of empathy coupled with the inability to be happy for a friend and brother certainly makes it possible.
@@viracocha I've experieced it firsthand, it's scary as fuck. They see it and the cogs start turning how they can outdo you, get it themselves, or take it away from you. It's instant scheming.
@@daniellee1722 That doesn't make them narcissists, that is just them being human. Everyone in this world feel jealousy at some point whether you like it or not.
Being with my ex narc for the past 8 yrs. made me observe this very pattern. I think they wanted to feel very important in a way that is disturbing. Instead of building trust with their intimate partners, they destroy the trust that they built with you (in that case lying when they tried to put you in their pedestal). Once they have a committed partner, they can’t stand being loved authentically by one person. Instead they go on and prey on other women that is susceptible to their love bombing. My ex narc was a compulsive pursuer in a relationship. He would go back and forth to the women he were involved before or try to meet women in complicated situation so that going public isn’t an option while having you as their main supply. In the end they destroy the very person that loved them. They are like toddlers testing your love for them. Showing and telling them you love them isn’t enough, they will cheat on your face to make you feel inadequate even if you are more than they deserve. They want to test your love for them so they keep hurting you and when you have enough of their abuse, you leave. Then they tell you, ‘you never loved me because you abandon me’. Well in fact it’s their actions and narcissistic behavior that made you leave or in other cases they discard you and will give silly reasons of the discard. Mine would use, ‘she’s crazy’, ‘she’s a nega-star’, ‘she insults me’, ‘she cheated on me’ et al. So with this pattern of infidelities and emotional abuse (who knows what else) it’s better to walk away. I did walk away and is now rebuilding my life with our daughter. We are struggling financially because I’m not earning enough to provide for my daughter but now we get to laugh and bring with us sunshine every day. No lies, no abuse and no fake love. We only live once, forgive yourself and move forward but never forget the lesson that narc abuse taught you. That is to respect yourself to walk away from what’s hurting and destroying you. That you deserve a life of solitude, happiness and love. Hugs*** :) Additionally I hired a private detective Metaspyhub@gmail. com. Once I knew what the narc was up to, it got easier to get over that lying, cheating, sack of doo doo, loser. I didn’t need closure from the narc, I paid for it. Best money I EVER spent!
people never trust these comments with emails to private detectives, or scam recovery. they will be scammer. Wow though that was a convincing story there for a minute
"They want to test your love for then so they keep hurting you." Job comes to mind poor guy :(
too long didn't read
@@andreww4751Be glad you didn’t waste your time. She dropped an email at the end so clearly this is not a true story and she is more then likely a scammer haha
It's pretty clear the people that have had a real clinical narcissist in their lives and those who confuse narcissistic actions or tendencies with a true personality disorder. Narcissism is so much more than being obsessed with yourself. I lived with a narcissist for 7 years and he nearly destroyed me emotionally. I have never met anyone like him in my entire life and I am 56 years old, I pray that I never do again. My ex was a very terrible liar and when I would question inconsistencies or things that were obviously impossible to be true he would get very angry and accuse me of interrogating him. I have been free of this monster for 8 years and I am still healing from his reign of terror in my life. I appreciate those who have taken the time and effort to inform and educate people about the monsters that are out there looking for lives to terrorize.
Everyone in the comments has dated a narcissist somehow
Unfortunately they are often very “weak” people. They project strength but in moments that call for courage, they can’t stand up for you or for another person. It’s like they are made up of balloons or like they hate life and humanity.
A little poke and they crumble or attack someone. Quite a sad way of life.
People think selfish is the same as narcissistic, which is why everyone thinks they have dated a "narcissist". Almost everyone puts their needs and wants before those of others, that is not narcissism. Narcissistic people operate in a world of delusion. While we may weigh the affects our actions have on others and ultimately decide to chose the action that benefits ourselves, narcissists do not even consider these things. Everything is a calculated decision to increase admiration from others, personal gain, and ego inflation. They are basically playing a video game where they are the only real character and everyone else in a NPC who only matters if they can serve the purpose I mentioned above.
I dated a narcistic girl who I really liked for 3 months, took me longer to recover then the amount of time I dated her lmao. I can only imagine how difficult that must have been. As I was already aware of it early in the dating phase when I started to question her it made it easier to break it of finally before I was almost trapped. She really did not expect me to leave after the lies.
Them GASLIGHTING you is how they "eat"....its sick.
❤
I'm not a narcissist. I'm too perfect to have a big flaw like that
I see what you did there 👍
Hahaha
🤨
Nah bro you are a narcissist, unlike me, notice how you said you're perfect, where as someone as humble as I, would never say, I noticed that because I am very smart if you can't tell.
（*゜ー゜*）
“A narcissist is either the victim or the hero in every story they tell.”
Victims because they don't know how to say sorry once you figure them out 😁
Sometimes the Narcissist is both Hero and Victim in their story.
They're both!
I find that they're both.
I think its “AND the hero”
My exs brother gaslit me into thinking that I was a narcissist. I actually believed it. I always thought I did my best in the relationship but he convinced me I wasn't a good person. After watching this, I'm just now realising that he is the narcissist. He is very fixated on his image and compulsively lies to his wife.
This is common. I've never known anyone to be obsessed with the topic of narcissism, and to talk of it incessantly (in the context of "other people" of course), except narcissists!
"An accusation from a narcissist is actually a confession"
@@zach6643 this is bs no offense.
If you study psychology, you can spot a narcissist.
If you were in a relationship with a narc, this could be romantic, family, friendship, work etc. and you were burned by one, then you will be able to spot the other ones easily.
People who have NPD are extremely similar. They are mostly the same “people”.
@@christophbjorn6007please be careful when you try to diagnose people with any disorder.
Here is an example that happens very often and could be true for your example as well.
People who have ADHD/ADD share about 60% in behavior pattern with people who have NPD.
Their motives are completely different, but by old testing methods (6 traits out of 10 or with other words 60%) people with ADHD could be misdiagnosed as NPD.
If a person has ADHD they also can hyper focus on things that interest them, or they can hyper focus on something negative such as narcissistic abuse.
I heard multiple stories where people broke up because a bf/gf thought their significant other had NPD based on some videos and then many years later they learnt about ADHD and they realized, they were wrong.
The effortless lying thing is an interesting one. I rank fairly highly on the psychopathic scale and when I need to lie, I don't just say untruths, I 100% firmly believe what I am saying. It's like my mind can delude itself into whatever version of reality is required to tell a certain story.
Gross.
This is interesting. Could you elaborate a bit more, maybe with a specific example?
I understand that many people high on either sociopathy or psychopathy scales are not bad people, and it's highly intriguing from a cognitive science standpoint trying to understand why some people are this way and others are not.
Do you feel like it would be more predestined for someone higher on these scales to use their abilities for personal gain?
Or maybe the personal gain is just an downstream effect from the tendencies and behaviors resulting from the different cognition?
@@Hexnilium It is actually a superpower, the medical establishment is well known for pathologizing people instead of understanding the social conditions that lead to this and harnessing it for the purpose of finding the beneficial gift in it. People lying are not narcissists by design, it is often a survival mechanism and their consciousness is very multi-dimensional. I am not high on psychopathy myself, but also can believe in a lie and delude myself enough to live in that lie, because that is how we train our consciosuness for manifestation, we start to believe what does not exist in order to manifest it, so we lie. None of it has anything to do with narcissism. There is many reasons people like this. But true narcissism stems from the disconnection from practical reality bascially, and if the medical establishment was not interested in pathologizing anything that does not fit the norm, they would harness it the same way as the indigenous shamanic healers in indigenous tribes where narcissism was used as a gift for its imagination to tell stories. Again, the reason it causes harm because it is misguided and not trained and used for its benefits, it is forced into survival mode instead. Again and again we are finding that it is the capitalist system we live in as a whole that is the issue.
@@Hexnilium Some liars lie to themselves first, then once they are convinced they can lie without seeming dishonest. They then come to forget the truth because they reinforce the lie over and over.
Omg i can do that too... but i don't believe i am a psychopath. most people hate me lmao
*Literally no one:*
*Elizabeth:*
👁👁
👄
I sound like a man, believe my lies!
Lmao why is that so simple yet uncanny resemblance
Omg I literally started chocking on my noodles. Lmfaoooo 🤣🤣
Ltpwnface Now my chest hurts from laughing and I'm wiping away tears. I really can't with this comment. 💀
ShanteRoxxane You good? Lmao
Ltpwnface Yeah, I recovered. lol
Holmes sounds like me when I was a 15 year old boy trying to buy alcohol.
🤣🤣🤣
@🤣🤣🤣
What an absolutely original comment.
Bahahahaha 🤣🤣🤣
😂😂😂
There was this girl at school who was lying a lot, and badly, but she would never admit it, no matter how obviously she was caught. She would always come up with another, more ridiculous explanation
A narc displays many of the facets of a bully. I observed many bullys at school (in the 1970's) my response was if they tried to bully me I would wipe the floor with them. Point being let them know you are aware and show no fear.
She looks like Mark Zuckerberg wearing makeup and a big wig.
dude she spooked the hell out of me when i first saw her face
They were created in the same droid factory.
Same old nervous eyes
CIA has entered the chat 💭
She is a clone of him with a change of gender.
The only way to defeat a narcissist is completely cut them out of your life. It crushes them. They can't live with the fact that you want nothing to do with them. Make them dead to you
Narcissists feed on control. Once you're out, they cannot control you anyhow. They cannot even try anymore.
And that's the point
What if the Jerk in question is the mother of your children.
Jack Kanoff, you're the one who decided to produce children with a narcissist. I cut one off completely and it was almost too late.
NO CONTACT BABY
. ..it takes skill but most importantly self love.❤
@King White Knight They don't even really love themselves...
One way of telling is when the person wraps his arms around himself and hollers; "I love you!"
Hysterical that a video describing con men teaches a course on using those same skills to con others. Priceless…
billions of dollars and she still didnt take care of that dry hair
lmao bro
Danilo Ferraz 😂😂😂
Well it's not like she's a biologist or--oh.
and couldnt hire a personal makeup artist
No you didn't 😂😅
"An honest person always looks you straight into your eyes", my dad told me. My experience is that honest people very rarely look you straight into your eyes over time. But crooks/narcissists do!
So true! I get super uncomfortable when people hold eye contact and just wont look away during conversation. It's creepy. It feels like they're trying to sell me on something
You're right! The biggest liars I know won't even bat an eyelash while spewing their vicious lies.
It’s not true though. I rarely look people in the eye (at one point I tried to make it a habit but gave up) but I’m honest to a fault. I even feel uncomfortable using white lies. It sucks that people think like you, but most do. Honest attempts to help people are met with suspicion, so now I keep to myself and don’t bother.
Why do you get uncomfortable when someone looks into your eyes? Thats what your suppused to do while talking.
And how is that something crooks/narcists do?
My old man taught me eye contact in first meetings it shows a baseline for truth and respect. After you don't make eye contact much but when you think someone is lieing to you look them in the eye and ask them. Look for eyes twitching and body language.
Richard GRannon says the question to ask a narc in order to reveal themselves is "In what way would you improve yourself if you could?" This will cause a meltdown. 6M subscribers, well done, Charlie! Damn!
I’ve known narcs all my life (2000-2012). Now I gotta act like one to keep them off!
That moment when you realize that your partner have all of these ....
RUN
@@robertjazz3613 yeah 🤣
Bro i-
Get the duck out of this shi-
Get. Out.
I used to be a narcissist. Now I'm a self-aware narcissist, thank you
Don't self diagnose...its just a label for you. A personality is when a single trait deeply interferes your life and others close to you. Everybody has a part which is narcissistic.
@@aceraphael And this is called a joke
@@user-uq9dc8cr3c Ah...you may have noticed I didn't get the joke like many others who took your comment literally. The reply is not just for you...
@@aceraphael you’re the only one who didn’t get it. You’re the only comment
@@lastillrules365 The likes in my reply disagree... pfff :-|
The eyes are everything. They look soulless in these people.
Some excellent points made here. About not giving up on lies. But rather doubling down, for instance. Experience.
Her eyes are from the same robot company that made Zuckenberg's eyes
its from who framed roger rabbit. remember the acme company that made Christopher Lloyds eyes? same company man
Jesus christ died for your sins
Their eyes is like a window to vacuum.
"There is no war in Ba Sing Se" vibes.
The first thing I thought when I saw her was: is she related to Zuckerberg? Its uncanny how much the eyes look like his...
Her cold, dead eyes are a huge giveaway. Be careful out there everyone.
Psychopath eyes
Be careful to judge too fast.
I've never got the eye thing. Usually something like that is said about someone AFTER it's found out that there's something wrong with the person. I wouldn't guess anything only based on her eyes.
Cold, dead, black eyes. RUN 🙅
@@globaldigitaldirectsubsidi4493 um, there is no mistaking this cold evil stare from this particular parasite, be careful to trust in that as well.
Working with a narcissist is a stinkin nightmare! I’m glad that chapter is over!
I had a problem with a narcissist who had turned my workplace into a fearful place where work colleagues whispered to each other to avoid being overheard by him. He had sued his public service workplace for things like fake injury and defamation for so long that he had effectively been paid for 18 months of no work. A work lawyer told me his legal actions had cost the department over $2M - and he was still on the payroll. After I figured out he was a vexatious litigant with a dark triad personality - obsessive, paranoid, narcissist - he tried to contact me - I simply ignored him completely and avoided any further contact.
I feel like social media is making narcissism worse and epidemic. Everybody is consumed with projecting an image of a perfect life that’s dissociated from reality instead of focusing on developing themselves.
Maybe, I'd like to think that they were always that way and social media highlights their personality's and isn't making people worse. Everything is so new in the grand scheme of things we might just notice it more because there is more to see.
yeah, narcissistic traits have risen at a rapid rate since the 80's and are continuing to accelerate, in particular on college campuses ( *hmm i wonder why* ). I think social media has a lot to do with it.
Dating apps too.. never know what you’re going to get
thats why i removed social media in my life. about 50% happier now
It is, same as increased availability of 'elite' goods for all people and the always increasing wealth of all members of society, pretty much every psychologist talks about it and papers about social media and narcissism are a staple every single year on master's degree courses, to the point where I'm wondering why anti-plagiarism software doesn't just mark half of them
Just looking at her eyes it makes me feel uncomfortable. It's like my instincts are telling to RUN!
Omg sameee. I was scared just looking at her eyes.
My instincts are telling me to fight.
That is actually a response to psychopath or sociopath
He froze on her eyes for like 2 seconds and I jumped because she is so terrifying and disgusting.
Yup
Watching this to hide my narcissism better
They also love to tell seemingly harmless stories where they were the hero and did a noble and amazing thing so you trust them and praise them
I have never seen such big lifeless eyes. My God. Creepy af
Everything about that chick feels off.
Thats an adderall face
It’s incredible how fake she looks now, but I wonder how I would’ve perceived her if I had seen those interviews before she got caught.
Uncanny Valley Sim.
its probably not human
"You lie so much you believe yourself" - Metallica
Holier than thoooouuuu!!!!!!
Dickbutt
It's not a lie if you believe it.~George Costanza
Lie too much and too long that people very soon realize what is really going on.thats the KARMA for me
@@DMONEY7720 lmao
I believe my ex was a narcissist. They were obsessed with image, being perceived as perfect, and constantly lied to everyone around them, including me, in order to keep their bloated sense of self secure. They lied to me even from before we started dating. They were also charming, and managed to attract all sorts of people. Once they realized they couldn’t control me, things got ugly and I got genuinely scared, my gut feeling screamed at me to get out of the place we were in and never look back. I’m not being very detailed here but it was truly one of the most awful experiences in my life. I don’t wish upon nobody that they ever cross a narcissist.
I am what you might call a pathological liar or a semi-narcissist, and the video is spot on about the ease with which I can make up and tell lies. It's a second nature, it's so easy, since I can easily half-believe my own lies... It's terrifying and all the more hard to get rid of. I want to be better, but I catch myself lying just because, I always need to apologize and correct myself a few moments later in the conversation, because I'm just so used to it. It's horrible. Not to mention that I don't really believe other people with their words and actions, because all the world is a game of self-interest for me, so I can't really trust others. It's very tough to get out of.
I aspire to be like you. My honestly has always gotten me in so much trouble. I've learned the hard way that if it's something the other person doesn't want to hear then lie. Lie in any situation that benefits you. I wish I learned to lie sooner and quite frankly it's a crime that the skill wasn't taught in school.
How do we know you're telling the truth now about this?
Do you think you being this way has much to do with your upbringing?
@@petelee2477 go on, but you’ll reap what you sow :)
@@JustinLazlo The upbringing is responsible for quite a lot, but in this case I wouldn’t say so actually. I think it’s more due to some strange genetics. My mother and grandmother are both like this, but I learned that only when I was an adult.
When you want to be the female Steve Jobs but end up being the female Mark Zuckerberg
And without the useful product to boot
The eyes hahahaha
@krishna adhikari lolol good one
@krishna adhikari dad jokes
Why is everyone bashing Mark Zuckerberg?
They never listen whenever you tell them a story. They always find ways to make the conversation about them and them alone.
I have a friend like that,but I noticed very late.
Plot twist,the dude just talks about his dead cat the whole time so you always try to change subject xd.
Found this out to late myself, now I'm stuck in the situation with no way out really
Exactly -- while you're talking, they're only thinking about what they are going to say NEXT. When it becomes apparent I call them out on it directly, giving them a quick second with a "mirror moment" -- F 'em if they don't respond to getting called out proper.
A good narc always listens
Such a great video. When I was younger, it took me a while to figure people out. Now, I've got them sussed in 30 min conversation.
I think it's often also about their eyes. Always wide opened and that gaze.
She used to speak with a deep voice so that people would perceive her as being tough. Crazy.
That was her trying to be Maggie Thatcher... UK Prime Minister from the 80s.
And maybe take her more serious
Because female voices or high pitched voices are not taken as seriously.
Uh...common sense??
@@1987fallenstar Depends on context. When trying to operate outside of female roles, they will attempt to sound masculine. A cargo-cult effort.
In a natural context, I don't take women with low voices seriously, especially the vocal fry.
Dude...that fake baritone was lame as hell. Nope, not forgivable😂
Why so? I have a natural baritone . In fact Scots women are well known for having a baritone pitched voice. There us nothing more annoying than a high pitched nasal voice - it makes the ears bleed
@@tweetiepie551 having a baritone voice is great👍❤, faking one is just...not okay
That wasn't fake. Probably a man to begin with...
Not as lame as my daughter's new boyfriend insisting on talking like Sesame Street's "The Count". Then...factor in my shock when I found out he was hynotizing her and cleaning out her bank account. She had absolutely no memory of him taking the money and when I showed her the bank statement she literally could NOT see the numbers on the paper. It was one of the scariest things I've ever had happen because of a control freak insinuating their self into our home.
😂🤣
I think I work with one. It seems more and more that way. Very charming, and fun, especially at first. Says they can take any criticism and that you should tell them if you have any, but will dodge or throw back any criticism you give them. Will also retaliate in silly ways. They make me feel uncomfortable, and lie. Tries to paint others in a bad light (more recently) and always makes it sound like they're very professional (and concerned about professionalism) and good at what they do despite doing many things wrong or poorly. Lies for fun and laughs when we fall for it, tells me they're stealing things without blinking or showing any remorse. At least we're on to them, and I'm having discussions about them with certain people at my job.
Ditto. More or less. Wish we could collaborate
Textbook
The eyes are always a great indicator though. That dead gaze is an idicator to me. Not always for narciscism but for mental health issues in general. A lot of "thousand yard stares" are associated with things like severe trauma as well.
Clicking on this video: "Cool, I'm going to learn how to spot a narcissist."
After watching: "Am I a narcissist?"
😂😂
Gianna Williams 👍🏿
We all are narcissist to a certain extent...some are just more narcissistic than others (think of narcissism as a spectrum)
@Ange Lom I don't agree with you, narcissists ask this question to themselves, but they don't find being a narcissist is a wrong thing. (sorry for my broken english, It isn't my first language)
@Ange Lom That is not a true statement at all. Narcissism is a scale, and just because someone has that facet to them doesn't mean they also don't have things like a conscience or lack self-assessment. It may be less likely that a narcissistic person will own up to shortcomings or weaknesses but they are more than capable of questioning their own behaviors and even coming to the realization and acceptance that they are narcissistic. But there are plenty of other mental and personality disorders that can co-exist alongside narcissism which fall into line more closely with what you're describing
Her eyes are facing in a way that she’s always looking at you, it’s legitimately creepy.
Agreed, like one of those damn paintings.
@@iniubongnkanga9390 shut up bot don't listen to her this is advertisement
Right - I just look at her body language and think this person is way off so when they talk about these old men being captivated by her big blue eyes I just don't get it - she presents herself totally as a major transsexual, not that I am anti LGBTQ but that she is in no way sexually feminine or seductive. Instead your instinct should be to do a Crocodile Dundee move and check to see if a package is down there
Hawk eyes?
Honestly, i believe in the popular saying that “don’t trust too much because that too much might hurt you so much”. A Narcissist partner is not to be trusted. My greatest dissappointment was discovering my wife cheating on me through the help of Cyberhackingsage who helped cloned her cell phone. All i did was share my wife’s number with Cyberhackingsage and i got access to her Facebook, WhatsApp and text messages both deleted and incoming ones with a link on my phone. Contact him, he’s a genius. ( cyberhackingsage@gmail ) thank me later.
I knew a guy that was a pathological liar, and an alcoholic. One thing he like to do was to go to AA events or meeting and brag about his sobriety for X amount of time, even though he had drank that day and far from being sober.
There’s tons of other examples too. He’d tell people he was a veteran, a pilot, CIA agent with top secret clearance, a millionaire, or whatever lie he came up with that day.
If you KNOW you're dealing with a narcissist, pay close attention to what they say, how they say things, and what you say as close to verbatim as possible. They are very good at gaslighting you to make you believe that you're misremembering things, and if you start to question yourself, it's tough to regain that control.
At least in my experience, calling this person a liar was apparently the worst insult imaginable, all because I questioned a detail in her story that was brand new.
Compulsive liars will practically defend their lie to the death. It’s crazy.
It's not our fault we just can't give up the lie
@@francisbacon4363 that's a lie isn't it
@@wrestlinghe2638 nope this is actually true, I have a compulsion to not stop lying even if there's a gun to my head many times my father would beat me if I didn't stop lying and I never stopped lying and I never will, because it's an integral part of society
@@francisbacon4363 Ladies and gentlemen, we got em.
My sister is like this
I think ppl underestimate how many ppl are compulsive liars in everyday life...
Me MyselfandI - The influence of mass media.
Lawyers , doctors, salesmen ... all have to lie Everyday.
Compulsive liars are people who lie about things with no outcome. They just lie for the sake of lying. They can’t help it
@@jakerojas5888 Out of curiosity, what do doctors lie about? Certainly some are corrupt, but for most I don't think there is a strong incentive to be dishonest.
@@austininflorida They lie about the oath they took to treat everyone the same and provide care to all.
I do like this very direct and concise definition of NPD that I heard from Jordan Peterson:
"Narcissism is the inordinate desire for unearned social status."
When you see that definition all of the pathology and odd decisions that they make suddenly make a lot of sense.
Yes! I do like Jordon Peterson too. Solid fellow.
@@katiesimpson8517Jordan Peterson has become an unhinged political and religious hack, dodging any direct question with an insufferable word salad. He was alright back when he told young guys without father figures to clean their rooms, but that ship has sailed.
I used to be a narcissist but now im absolutely perfect💯
Anyone else feel on edge even when telling the truth? Mainly out of fear of not being believed I think.
yes! I thought I was the only one
Yeah sometimes
Samantha Atori its also that you’ve been gaslit so much if u have a crazy parent and they set u up to not be believable.
It's like that feeling when a police officer is behind your vehicle and you know you're not doing anything wrong but you get nervous that you're doing something wrong anyway.
Yeeeess exactly. And get even more anxious by thinking that nervousness will make me look like im lying
I was raised by a narcissist...all of this rings true. Big hugs to anyone affected by narcs. They are truly horrible people.
Yup not much worse than having whole family.of narcs let's connect in pain
my mom is a narcissist. to win an argument she told me i hugged her too hard and making her laugh was a burden. haven't seen her for 10 years now but im sure her self imposed misery keeps her nice and happy.
Same girl
I feel for you , I come from the same place . Both of my parents are .
What do you mean us n- I mean narcs aren't that bad.
Great video - well done.
I found out that my ex-boss was a liar, and just watched her closely when she’s lying. It was effortless to her. Amazing…
Having spent a couple of years living with a real manipulator, and having worked with a narcissist for even longer, I suspect that one of the reasons their lies can be so convincing is that they BELIEVE those lies themselves - so in their minds, they're actually telling you the truth.
Thats an interesting theory. I have worked for two narcissists. One male and one female. My female boss was adamant she was right all the time, even when she was obviously wrong. She would keep going until you were worn down and just agree with her, for a quiet life. My male boss is just as bad. He is a bully and enjoys picking on people. I have worked out his strategy, especially when new staff join. He is charismatic and charming to them. Praising them and laughing and joking. At the same time he is being awful to the rest of the staff. Bigging up the newcomer. The newcomer thinks he is great and the rest of the staff are just moaning. So he causes a divide between the staff. This goes on for a few weeks, then he strikes. He belittles and humiliates the new employee. Undermines their confidence that he has spent weeks building up. I call it separating the prey from the herd before he strikes They then see his true colours. Then they are welcomed into the protection of herd and he is left the bitter and despised person that he is. He disgusts me. Sorry for rambling 🤣🤣🤣🤣
My ex was like that. Lived in an alternate universe and believed it. But unlike a delusional person, he created his realities so he could always be right, be the focus of everything, be sympathized with. Leaving him was indeed the best thing I ever did.
@@jkm8741 That is a good description. Not rambling.
George Costanza taught us that it's not a lie, if you believe it. Lol.
@@jonathonwearn1098 - believing a self-delusion does NOT make it true.
There is *nothing* more tiring than being in the presence of a narcissist.
Truth
They drain all your energy!
People skills and confidence attracts people because you make them feel sure about you when you are sure about yourself and you show that you’re making an effort which is the secret to it all just making an effort. You’re able to see beyond yourself
always good to know when the next person is a narc
A lot of narcissists begin by tearing their victims down, and making them feel like they are wrong or can’t trust their opinions and instincts. They prey on kind people.
It's like a game. To see how much they can hurt or even destroy you. They derive extreme pleasure from the other person's pain. It is really sick.
@@patrickgreene2167 I don't know if they derive pleasure from others' suffering or that they just don't care. Fine line between a psychopath, narcissist, sociopath or soulless creatures. I am really cautious about being around people now. I feel for those in the workplace. It's such a treacherous environment. You just want to give them a wide berth. That's difficult in the workplace.
I’ve always had a gift for quickly sensing and identifying NPD monsters. Sadly, my dad married one. Sweetest guy on the planet, the dude everyone universally loved, she easily manipulated him into everything she wanted including busting up my family for her own personal gain. Close to four decades later, she still has him wrapped around her finger, in a position of despising me - and pretty much everyone else in my massive extended family - at every turn, just because she very early on learned that I, and we collectively, will not be controlled or affected by her rampant narcissism. So she instead slowly turned him against everyone who actually truly loved the man, by eroding his confidence in them since he was so easily malleable to her. NPDs are monsters, there’s no nice way of describing them. Sound like any other orange monster you know of?
@@TheDanno210 Absolutely. I’m so sorry, Dan. I’m going through something similar but with my dead husband’s sick family. I never thought I would be going through what I am. I trusted my husband. I’ll never trust anyone, again.
@@TheDanno210- Your description actually sounds exactly like Meghan Markle.
I have suffered narcissistic abuse since I was young and didnt realize what it was till I was older. Recovering from that sort of trauma and abuse is very difficult.
Very true, time and separation is powerful. I went through that abuse with my mother.
It's an disorder. They are ill. Abuse implies that they know what they are doing. As far as I reckon that's the line that separates narcissism from sociopathy.
@@derherrdirektor9686 illness doesnt excuse abuse plus one can have an illness and still be an abuser. So theres that, narcissistic abuse is one of the most traumatizing things that can happen.
In the same boat, try having your dad, and all your three siblings being narcissistic. We’re all not in contact anymore and I’m just thriving so much!
Same. My parent is a narcissist. It's hell.
i'm more off put by someone who is so comfortable saying anything with such silk smooth words.
I’ve learned enough about this topic from your video to sense the BS in the ad at the end
I have known two narcissists. I can now spot them a mile away. One thing I have noticed, is they can also be the most charming and charismatic people going. You really need to be on full alert around them and never switch off. Its like being in the jungle and sleeping with one eye open. I have to admit I do find them quite fascinating the way they think and manipulate people. Also never think you can change them. You won't, just get them out of your life..and quick.
its unfortunate because this is most definitely my mother. at least im in college now
I am proud to say that I survived nearly half my life by defending myself from a violent narcissistic sociopathic creature. I feel I deserve a medal.
@@philippaferguson1327 You do Philippa. The two that I know, were both my bosses. My nerves were shred. I cant even imagine living with them. Keep making a better life for yourself. The courage it must have taken to leave, shows you are one strong lady. Take care hon xx
@@jahfaricoumarbatch3947 Take the opportunity to make the best life you can. THEY are the issue and never let them believe it you. Keep going and never look back. Wishing you all the best x
@@jkm8741 🙏🏾
She looks like a female Mark Zuckerberg
Ye and she lies like him too
She wants to be*
Female lizard
The same lifeless, artificial, blank stare expression too.
those death eyes scare the fuck out me
As a diagnosed psychopath and narcissist, this is pretty accurate. No real remorse or care for how any individual perceives you. In the short term it is actually easier to lie b/c you can be relatable to a random stranger you will never meet again. Long term it is not a successful strategy b/c you will get caught repeatedly. Happy to answer Qs about what it's like
For a narcissist, it's all about them. A psychopath doesn't have to have others orbit around them.
You can tell just looking at her eyes, something is off. Borderline crazy.
No borderline- Full On.
True
I knew this one guy who had this weird fake smile one time. It was like they read a book on how to smile and tried it out. You'd think to picture someone smiling with dead eyes, but they were also forcing their eyes to smile. It was so creepy.
He'd even do what I call "personality appropriation." He would copy the behaviors, vernacular, and even colloquialisms of people near them. Even if you knew him for a short time, you had a feeling they were copying you and not in a flattering way. If he wasn't copying someone directly, there was alway something he was copying. His default mode was copying what I'd describe as an 18th century vampire. He'd use big words and sentences that you knew weren't natural to him plus there was a lot of word salad (his sentences made 0 sense, but he'd try to act like he was just too smart for you). And if you brought up something he clearly didn't get, he'd try to act like he did. And not in a "I'm just going to agree so we move on", but in a "look how smart I am -but really not- " way.
@@Vincisomething have we met?
No, not crazy at all, just a psychopath. She knows what she’s doing...
1) Having the world view them in a way that strokes their ego
2) Lie about ridiculous things
3) Sees video description
4) There is already a list with timestamps
5) I wasted my time
Hey it was a good laugh reading from 3 on
@@xkultra did big pump?
You didn't waste your time. You gave me a good laugh. Thanks!
Wow this is truly a great comment
😊 you're funny
I've known a lot of narcissists & people with dark triad traits, I attract them with my particular neurodivergence & am not turned off to them due to that ND.
Pretty accurate video. To a real narcissist, the truth and a lie are the same thing. They don't have a consistent self image & they often have gaps in memory, so lying is how they cover for that.
A young narcissist will probably assume everyone else is also lying and I've heard several say they think or thought (before diagnosis) that empathy was completely made up & people were just lying about it.
They vary in experience & capacity for empathy. Being an empathetic narcissist is not necessarily positive whatsoever, they use their understanding of emotion to hurt people more effectively & it definitely helps mask their harmful traits.
Great stuff 👍
The best way to deal with a narcissist, sociopath or psychopath is to stop communicating with them.
Trouble is, you've got to identify them first.
@@Radagast- First thing you do is see if she has a wedding ring on
This makes them worse
Run away never look back
@@Radagast- the three act the same with minor differences
The first ten minutes of this video taught me to be skeptical of the last two minutes.
Glad I wasn't the only one.
Exactly lol. First 10 minutes: beware of narcissistic people trying to con you into shady things.
Last 2 minutes: Here's our miracle self-help course that can make you charistmatic and successful in 30 days.
@@Transilvanian90 theres a difference between narcicism and confidence. To sell a product, you need confidence. He's simply displaying what others think of him in order to gain credibility for the product.
Shawn Spear same
No. Every 'Artists' are.
So I had a bad period in my life where I was a compulsive liar. The reason I became that way was due to how my upbringing trained me to be. See I grew up in an abusive household so to keep peace in the house me and my siblings became good liars. Because we learned at a young age a white lie was better than the reaction the truth would give. At first it was only in the house then it moved to lying in school. Then it was a regular thing. Luckily I spent a few years breaking it and so did my siblings but when I come near my parents it’s like something just activates inside my brain or a switch was just flipped as a defensive measure. But I just have to force my self to tell the truth around them. It’s still a challenge to deal with even to today.
I’ve never related to a comment more
What’s scary is that when it’s pointed out you say “oh yeah” and it seems a lot more obvious.
Whilst I can say I thought a lot of her traits were odd it’s in retrospect I can say it makes sense.
As other have pointed out, things like her “stare” jump out at you but enough people believed her to overlook it.
"you're probably going to encounter some of them [narcissists] in your life"
*rolls eyes and sighs* ...yeah... too late
Youre cringey
Youre even more cringey
Yessenya Davis you rated ur own comment up, no comment needed
Lmao that wasn't even me, watch ima like my own comment and its gonna go up to 2
Yessenya Davis people agree with my comment bc they have life experiences. It’s not cringe u ignorant toddler
Oh my God her slipping in and out of baritone was goddamn terrifying.
Plus the eyes. Like a faulty android from the future.
edit: just realized how conspiracy like that sounds. I mean it, as in a Sci fi movie.
More like a scareatone am I right
@@alsnow1049 😂😂
@@angelaharwood416 low hanging fruit 😁
@@alsnow1049 I love a good pun lol
Eyes rarely blinks!
Recovering from being groomed by a narcissistic boss. They subtly manipulated my normal desire to succeed and perform at my role to pressure me into making questionable choices. Others on the team picked up quicker but eventually I was able to open my eyes. And then the facade dropped and it was shocking how much the pathological lying ramped up. In a way, I’m grateful this happened so I’m never as trusting and alert to warning signs. Glad to see the execs slowly come to the same conclusion, so that person eventually had to “resign”. Phew!
Those eyes gave me a panic attack
The same. My heart is beating crazily,
@@a.m.4690 Omg Samee!!
I kinda got used to it through
It’s their high energy and pure confidence that tricks people
Quoth the Raven "Nevermore"
I’ve always had a general mistrust for very confident people
Gaslighting is the number one culprit. Those with high energy and confidence are just individuals that have a lust for life :)
🙌🏾 facts
@@hazmatt3250 Keep having that. In gaming, testing new tammates every half an hour, I realized that those who don't like their leadership debated are those who most often take us to disastrous defeats.
I often try not to lie consciously.i happy with myself for that.
Thinking back on family, friends and mates: if someone is not comfortable staying home alone on a Saturday night....or shames you for doing the same (including refusing plans...) you are in for a world of hurt. Need for outer acceptance and insecurity runs rampant. They will attempt to tear you down at some point. Get Out early.
i wish schools and colleges told us and prepared us for this world. thanks a lot buddy , your videos are great.
Anshuman Mishra Anshuman Mishra the reason for this is bc narcissistic people seek out careers of power, like doctor, nurse, preschool teacher and college professor. Not just politicians and CEOs. (Some of) The narcissists taught us
why would they? schools teach people to sit down, raise ur hand, follow rules and do as ur told sheep..if i had kids, i would never send them to a school. Id home school them myself.
On another note, Elizabeth is just one person that got caught. Imagine the other scams that havent been exposed yet..
Colleges are usually run by narcissists who wish to deceive. After all, most college degrees are useless. Lots of the "education" has an agenda behind it. Why would they wish to blow their cover and reveal their weakness?
School narrows your views on the world while also asking you not to be narrow minded
Thats what parents should teach you.
Ego is the most important entity in a narcissists life. Walking away and being ghosted is the most devastating thing a narcissist can experience. They never get over it.
Do not suffer a narcissist. Move on with your life. Life is to be enjoyed, not suffered unnecessarily.
They get over it as soon as they find their next victim to leach off of.
Well Said!!!!!
@@jt2473 2 days ago, a friend of mine explained what a narcissist is:
"A narcissist is someone who demands you give up everything to be their nothing."
Blew me away.
So a person is not suppose to have an ego?
@@amphibiouscs7259 The ego with narcs is way over inflated. It isn't a healthy sense of ego. Complete lack of empathy for others, it is all about them.
oh boy the not taking criticism hits the nail in the head. another telling sign is one-upping. one of my old friends who i no longer talk to did that all the time. If I had a story to tell, he would always have a similar story, but better/worse/heavier/darker to the point that it annoyed me to death. When I called him out on some behavior that I didn't like on his part, he would list all the problems that he had in life, and say things like 'I have PTSD' to justify treating other people like garbage. he would even call me sick in the head and tried to accuse me of encouraging him to unalive himself, which nobody believed luckily. these people really are vipers in disguise.
Narcissists do not lack feelings of guilt or shame, they have it so intensely that they need to cover it up or deny it constantly. They tend to lack empathy, not emotions altogether. I think you are getting narcissists mixed up with psychopaths and sociopaths in some of your explanations of traits. Their toxic guilt and shame are something they are constantly trying to hide and run from , which is why they resort to what they do.