Women's Sexuality Isn't 'Complicated' | Sarah Barmak | TEDxToronto

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 31 พ.ค. 2024
  • On October 27, 2016, some of Toronto’s greatest thinkers and change-makers joined together onstage at TEDxToronto to deliver powerful talks and performances that embodied our theme, Symbols + Signals.
    To learn more visit: tedxtoronto.com.
    Follow TEDxToronto on Twitter (@TEDxToronto), Facebook (TEDxToronto), and Instagram (@TEDxToronto).
    Born and raised in Thornhill, Ontario, Sarah is a freelance journalist and author. Her first book, Closer: Notes From the Orgasmic Frontier of Female Sexuality, was published in July 2016, with a focus on exploring the cutting-edge science and cultural trends behind women’s sexuality.
    Sarah’s message aims to reveal how women today are reshaping their sexuality in new and innovative ways - and how female sexuality is being redefined on its own terms. Sarah’s work has appeared in publications such as Maclean’s, The Globe and Mail, The Walrus, The Toronto Star, This Magazine and Canadian Business.
    This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at ted.com/tedx

ความคิดเห็น • 802

  • @yek636
    @yek636 3 ปีที่แล้ว +145

    It's really unbelievably wrong to not have a body part in the anatomy books.

    • @deltaflux2381
      @deltaflux2381 ปีที่แล้ว

      Not per se, it's just because it has an important function that is unbelievably wrong. Besides, that only goes for really old textbooks

  • @DZrache
    @DZrache 6 ปีที่แล้ว +496

    Spot on. If this talk makes you feel defensive, you need to unpack those feelings - there's no shame in developing self-awareness.
    People with vaginas need to stop being shamed for their sexuality (or lack thereof,) and learn to embrace it.
    And people need to listen to them when they tell them what does and doesn't feel good - even if they can't or won't say outright, reading your partner's signals is so important.
    And no, this doesn't take anything away from "more important" issues, or MGM/FGM/IGM etc.

    • @amandawallace2604
      @amandawallace2604 6 ปีที่แล้ว +27

      My thoughts exactly, if both partners express their likes and dislikes then everybody's happy. Some people are too shy to say what they like or don't like, so it's important to ask.

    • @zoegreen4147
      @zoegreen4147 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      DZrache HEAR HEAR

    • @mekelreen9869
      @mekelreen9869 5 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      If you don’t like something then say something.

    • @fivestring65ify
      @fivestring65ify 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Communication is the key.

    • @mekelreen9869
      @mekelreen9869 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      DZrache if they can’t or won’t say it then you can’t expect that we will know how to read it.

  • @ShaudaySmith
    @ShaudaySmith 7 ปีที่แล้ว +929

    When will i learn that the comments section is a black hole. This particular one is full of self proclaimed women's sexuality experts... Her argument is just advocating for education, experimentation, acceptance, and enjoyment of your preference. She isn't holding men accountable for women's sexual satisfaction, on the contrary, women are responsible for it. The history lessons just bring context to the confusion of sexuality between the sexes. Ya'll need to relax and not feel so affronted by a woman advocating women understand their own needs and desires and not feel bad/wrong/inefficient/shame for their preference.

    •  7 ปีที่แล้ว +31

      Shauday Smith that would be all well & good if that was all women advocated for...but you & I both know that's an utter falsehood. Women want EVERYONE to pay attention to them, CONSTANTLY, especially men, who they expect to manipulate & control thru passive aggressive behavior. If women were actually HONEST, with themselves and men...well then, this would be a different planet, then, wouldn't it?

    • @ShaudaySmith
      @ShaudaySmith 7 ปีที่แล้ว +85

      What falsehood do you mean? The sexual accountability thing? That is not a false, whether the women in your life choose to be accountable for their own sexual satisfaction is not up for debate here. The speakers advocacy for accountability, education, and acceptance by women is true. I do not hold my husband accountable for my satisfaction, it is up to me to communicate my desires and preferences every time. Of course he takes pride in being involved in the process but if i don't get where i need to go, it's not his failing as a lover, it's my poor communication/guidance from either being lazy, in a rush, or just not having my head in the game...as it were. lol. It sounds like you've had a lot of selfish and manipulative women in your life. Sorry to hear that, but i bet you could also note equally selfish and manipulative men if you thought on it... i know for every woman that came into my life that was primarily self serving, i can recall the same number of men as well.

    •  7 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      Shauday Smith
      the falsehood(s) I'm speaking about aren't primarily about sexuality, although they lead to its dysfunction in relationships. You said it yourself: often times ppl don't have their head in the game...this is true of a ton of women, if not most. And pls dispense with the "but men...too" nonsense. Men's faults are on full display, again CONSTANTLY, and we are talking about WOMEN, exclusively. And no...I haven't been mistreated disproportionately by women either, so you can erase that train of thought from the picture as well. What I, and eventually most men, WILL do is hold women ACCOUNTABLE as people, and all the responsibilities included therein. This constant need for gynocentrism to not only be defended, but maintained, is the root of many current issues.

    • @ShaudaySmith
      @ShaudaySmith 7 ปีที่แล้ว +48

      sorry, i still didn't get your original "falsehood" grievance. Not trying to knock your opinion, this is one the rare moments in my YouTubing when someone actually responded to my comment and i am interested in the conversation. So, to take a step back, i want to say thanks for reading my comment and taking the time to press on it some! seriously!
      Back to the topic and my original confusion on your use of the term 'falsehood.' You still didn't describe what you meant by it. My "but men [[blank]] too" comment is not nonsense. It's a request to not blanket term an entire gender with a negative generalization that does not further understanding and only belittles the concerned party. I hold men accountable as people and not as generalized stereotypes, which is why i felt confident stating, "but men too" .... because men do too! In specific regard to the area of being self serving as noted previously... it's a human trait and both genders are susceptible to it. To fault only one is disingenuous of holding both genders accountable as people.
      In regards to the comment on the amount of negative women in your life, i don't know you, i was making an assumption, sorry it was incorrect. I don't want to throw shade. She acknowledges men's faults in properly identifying and treating of women's sexual issues in the past because it provides context. Valid context to the talk. Women were largely forbidden to enter professional medicine careers, and weren't consulted in tests, experiments, and research studies about women's sex and health. This is not to vilify them, it's just true. These inaccurate studies and assertions only propelled distorted perceptions of women and sex. This isn't saying, "men bad! men wrong!" this is just a note of history to aid in understanding the disconnect.
      However, she doesn't note that a lot of women self propelled many distorted opinions on women's sexuality throughout history around the world. That it was the mothers and grandmothers that circumcised their daughters.

    • @jackster1212
      @jackster1212 7 ปีที่แล้ว +63

      Hey SS, I'm commenting only because you mentioned you don't get many replies to your comments... and I wanted to leave one that you deserved to get. Just to say thanks for adding additional fine insight. I'm a man who's spent a lifetime trying to figure out what women want, and a large chunk of that time focusing on one woman, my wife. I don't feel much closer to an answer... except when I acknowledge that one answer probably isn't the way to go. I don't get why so many of my fellow sex are so terrified when a woman speaks about how it is or might be for women. Personally, I find the topic fascinating. Because, why wouldn't I? Anyway, thanks for your comments... you sound like a pretty sharp person.

  • @StephJ0seph
    @StephJ0seph 3 ปีที่แล้ว +42

    This explains a lot for me as a young woman, thank you so much! 🙏🏽💖

  • @Ada-tv7zl
    @Ada-tv7zl 4 ปีที่แล้ว +38

    Thank you Sarah for spreading awareness!

  • @sophiachuslinkoracleoftime3529
    @sophiachuslinkoracleoftime3529 4 ปีที่แล้ว +277

    YES. "They could have just asked women about their experience"

    • @carlsmith7629
      @carlsmith7629 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Not in that time u didnt do that or her husband would be knocking your door down.

    • @knyazhefilms2154
      @knyazhefilms2154 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      and then women would just fail to tell or formulate, like this one failed to deliver something worthy listening ... or at least something(!) useful

    • @knyazhefilms2154
      @knyazhefilms2154 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @Ezio Auditore Da Firenze why on earth did you do it? ))

    • @Godbrother
      @Godbrother 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Scientists dont necessarily ask subjects what they truly want to know, they observe and report. Actions and behaviors speak louder than words.

    • @JLA6
      @JLA6 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@carlsmith7629 you are

  • @katireijonen
    @katireijonen 3 ปีที่แล้ว +41

    A great TED-talk! Thank you Sarah Barmak

  • @tonykouros4859
    @tonykouros4859 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    A Masterpiece talk that overwhelmed all my Senses! Grateful, Grateful 🙏✨

  • @yobrojoost9497
    @yobrojoost9497 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    This is nothing short of enlightening! Bravo!

  • @so9605
    @so9605 3 ปีที่แล้ว +57

    Camera zoom-in should have been made when the diagram of the « Non-linear response » was shown.

    • @dcxdanny
      @dcxdanny 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      YES....Some video editing to show that and also other info on the overhead screen would have been nice.

  • @charlesward8196
    @charlesward8196 4 ปีที่แล้ว +193

    A woman needs to find out what works for her, and then find a partner who is willing to cooperate with her to ensure that they both experience full pleasure.

    • @cosima423
      @cosima423 3 ปีที่แล้ว +22

      I totally agree, its mainly womens fault for not telling their partners what pleases her. However why should women find a man who is "willing" to please us. Why should it be something we have to search for, any decent man or women would at least try to please their partner. You sure dont see men trying to find women who are willing to please them.

    • @alessandromorelli5866
      @alessandromorelli5866 3 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      I think there are plenty of men too that are willing to try out and cooperate with their partner, sometimes though, it feels like we (as men) are trying more to find out what is it that she needs than she herself...

    • @georgekurgansky5986
      @georgekurgansky5986 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Some women flat out won't say what they actually like as if they are scared of it or they just want you to be able to read their mind. Instead she tollerates the guy doing it all wrong and she pretends to be happy because she lacks the backbone because she thinks it will possibly very very slightly challenge / upset someone, when actually the guy would be more upset from repeating the wrong action.. So that's just her problem really if she refuses to speak about it at all and best to leave her alone, because who knows what else she secretly puts up with.

    • @Jose-rj6nj
      @Jose-rj6nj 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@georgekurgansky5986 I completely agree with that part, she needs to know what works for her, if she doesn't know yet, that's okey but she need to start trying to find out the things she likes because then, she will be able to communicate and teach her partner the things that she likes and how she likes them done, instead of ignoring that aspect, and expect that her partner do everything and magically find out what she likes and how she likes because at the end of the day, the one that will be complaining will be her. It's not my history, but it's the fact that help us to improve our communication (me and my gf) and enjoy everything more together with less stress and pressure

    • @dumfriesspearhead7398
      @dumfriesspearhead7398 2 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      @@georgekurgansky5986 "She lacks the backbone to do it" Sometimes quite rightly so, but I wouldn't call it lacking a backbone, but intuitively knowing that he will not respond well if she does state her needs. Plenty of women dance around men in and outside the bedroom.

  • @Kryptik33
    @Kryptik33 3 ปีที่แล้ว +32

    And this, ladies and gentlemen, is why, as a born American, I love Canada, and seriously may move there in the near future.
    They are so open minded about things.
    Love y'all up there.

    • @melonie_peppers
      @melonie_peppers 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      As a South African(an outsider) looking into American culture, I'm starting to think you can't say or do anything without being politically correct or worrying about offending someone

    • @Peter_Parker361
      @Peter_Parker361 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@melonie_peppers Aaaaand you would be totally correct with that observation of yours! (: That being said, it's even worse in Canada than in the US... "Open minded" my *ss! ^^

    • @XxAzureNekoxX
      @XxAzureNekoxX ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@melonie_peppers canada is actually more politically correct than America. So i don’t understand this original comment.

  • @Bookhermit
    @Bookhermit 5 ปีที่แล้ว +92

    While there are many good points brought up here, I think it's VERY clear that it IS 'Complicated'!!!

    • @sensiblejack3294
      @sensiblejack3294 5 ปีที่แล้ว +24

      This is going in circles but the point was that it is deemed complicated because it is alienated.

    • @fistnamelastname5130
      @fistnamelastname5130 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Yeah it would seem so, but she’s advocating for learning and understanding to decomplicate

    • @bobafett4457
      @bobafett4457 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@fistnamelastname5130 learning doesn't make something less complicated, you just understand it better

  • @TheJoern
    @TheJoern 4 ปีที่แล้ว +134

    As a man, I am pretty sure that most of us could use that same advice.

    • @somabalestra1131
      @somabalestra1131 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      You're so awesome, stay cool!

    • @colingraham1585
      @colingraham1585 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      As a man, I have know idea what you mean

    • @mikem6176
      @mikem6176 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Turn in your Man card. You’ve lost all Man privileges.

    • @FiddlebirdBlue
      @FiddlebirdBlue 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Stay golden, Joern. Stay golden. (Also, if you feel that way and liked this video, check out The Good Men Project! It's chock full of equally interesting and even more applicable-to-you information there.)

    • @fourstringmania
      @fourstringmania 3 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      Men need to learn how to love a woman in order to get her to desire to be made love to. Men don’t know how a woman’s desire works.

  • @seeker2716
    @seeker2716 3 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    DEEEEEP DEEEEEP GRATITUDE for your work!!!!!! 🙏🙏🙏 From Belgium, Europe

  • @mr.soundguy968
    @mr.soundguy968 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    2:26 this is the core of the story

  • @Babesinthewood97
    @Babesinthewood97 7 ปีที่แล้ว +92

    A few things under estimated in regards to feeling attraction and lust: kindness and respect. Getting back what you invest in someone. As well as excercise and plant foods.

    • @reynoldgelus204
      @reynoldgelus204 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Vikylondros

    • @glennpiriou6322
      @glennpiriou6322 4 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      In my experience women aren't attracted to kindness

    • @cva9105
      @cva9105 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      When men show kindness and respect they are immediately put in the orbiter friendzone. I like your view though.

    • @samantha8178
      @samantha8178 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I value kindness and strength of character more than anything in a mate. I need to be able to trust someone. It's not really that complicated, but I can see how not being a good person would make some of you "confused".

    • @cva9105
      @cva9105 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      @@samantha8178 You must be older, younger women look on basic kindness as either a "creepy manipulation" or as a weakness to be exploited. Now I only show kindness to proven women, men and children.

  • @mladendelic7284
    @mladendelic7284 4 ปีที่แล้ว +37

    Quote: "Women can begin an encounter for many different reasons that aren't desire, like curiosity."
    I think there are a lot of men who would have deep understanding for such a ladies. It is really not complicated at all.

    • @jakobole
      @jakobole 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      But I don't see many women show curiosity towards a homeless man. For a man : No competences = no money = no woman in your life

    • @mladendelic7284
      @mladendelic7284 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@jakobole This is really simple. Only few words. Not complicated at all.

    • @jakobole
      @jakobole 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@mladendelic7284 You got me :)

    • @moonlight4665
      @moonlight4665 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      @@jakobole To be fair, pretty much all of society ignores the homeless

    • @dumfriesspearhead7398
      @dumfriesspearhead7398 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@jakobole Why would they though?

  • @avimehenwal
    @avimehenwal 4 ปีที่แล้ว +48

    Very informative ... I didn't knew about most of the interesting topics discussed here. Thankyou for sharing.
    Hope it makes me better partner from here on :)

    • @andreeateodor8118
      @andreeateodor8118 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Yep. We should develop and learn in order to be a better partener in the future if we want someone by our side in the future

  • @14jasminedel
    @14jasminedel 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thank you, so much 💜

  • @Lionofthelovinggod1
    @Lionofthelovinggod1 4 ปีที่แล้ว +62

    It’s 80% in my mind and 20% in the physical. Make love to my mind for God’s sake. So endeavour to understand the individual. Also, Partners would rather lift their arms to drink than stimulate their partners. Laziness.

    • @commentatron
      @commentatron 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      There's the rub, men's ratio may be flipped - 20:80. May also explain the popular men's refrain of, "I can't read your mind."

    • @Joel_FC
      @Joel_FC 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      "Make love to my mind" ahem... (stares in confusion) and how do you do that?

    • @Lionofthelovinggod1
      @Lionofthelovinggod1 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Joel F. Cardenas take an interest. Learn her likes and dislikes. What moves her to tears. Know her eye colour. Tell her she’s beautiful/smart/clever etc. take her breakfast in bed. Buy her perfume/flowers/a book. Encourage her to follow her dreams. Help her follow her dreams. When she feels loved/seen/appreciated she will bloom like a rose in the garden, brighten your day and treat you like a king.

    • @chriscodling6573
      @chriscodling6573 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      That's sounds entitled

    • @noodle_knight
      @noodle_knight 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@Lionofthelovinggod1 And what would you consider an equal reciprocation to all of that to be?

  • @jfinney225
    @jfinney225 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    Probably one of THE best Ted talks I've EVER watched... And I'm obsessed with watching Ted talks of all subjects. Bravo!

  • @BleezyMonkey
    @BleezyMonkey 4 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    if you having all fake relationships that doesnt go anything beyond physical things. dont expect to be totally satisfied

  • @radheshyamdevotion7132
    @radheshyamdevotion7132 7 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Thanks. great talk

  • @rdallas81
    @rdallas81 4 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    Woman, men....its all in your head. The quicker you figure that out, the quicker you will reap the huge benefits of knowing. It changed my entire life.

    • @bobafett4457
      @bobafett4457 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Can you specify what you mean? Maybe I don't understand what you mean because I'm not a native speaker

    • @leandrog2785
      @leandrog2785 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @@bobafett4457 You don't understand what he meant because it's so vague it's almost meaningless.

    • @KxNOxUTA
      @KxNOxUTA ปีที่แล้ว +1

      No. While it's true that far less divides us than society makes us think, the medical aspects are actually the part where the physical distinction is very real. And the different effects of misogynistic socialisation also effect people unequally and that must be discussed before we can move on to the "Only few actually relevant differences, the rest is in our head" part. We're nowhere near that yet.

  • @lawrenceralph7481
    @lawrenceralph7481 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    A long time ago, it was suggested that I move out of their path and leave it to them. Seemed liberating to me...Taking this to heart, I don't think about this topic any more than I think about shoes

  • @antonykj1838
    @antonykj1838 5 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    Great and informative👍👍

  • @frederickhoward5598
    @frederickhoward5598 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    I agree,and it's not that complicated once you overstand erotic neuralism and bio- chemistry of both anatomies.(Knowledge of Self on All Levels)

  • @zachvaron
    @zachvaron 5 ปีที่แล้ว +126

    Sad that even an insightful video like this brings out the moronic chauvinist comments that are, sadly, the basis of our society. Keep fighting Sarah!

  • @pontiuspilatus7900
    @pontiuspilatus7900 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Brilliant

  • @lyra951
    @lyra951 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thank you

  • @tsundokista
    @tsundokista 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Muy buena charla. Recomendadísimo el libro de Sarah Barmak, "Orgasmo"

  • @emilyramirez5892
    @emilyramirez5892 6 ปีที่แล้ว +61

    Loved it! It is amazing and she speaks the truth!

    • @slardebard
      @slardebard 5 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      No tell your man what you like that is truth.

    • @molliemcnerny4243
      @molliemcnerny4243 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@slardebard oh, if it was only that easy slardebard.

    • @slardebard
      @slardebard 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@molliemcnerny4243 it is that easy, problem is to many women dont know what they want.

    • @mikem6176
      @mikem6176 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      slardebard The one question no woman throughout history has ever given a straight answer to: “What do you want to do tonight?”
      Still think asking her will actually go anywhere?

  • @zoubilizou8888888
    @zoubilizou8888888 5 ปีที่แล้ว +20

    Better understanding is long overdue. Is this the whole talk? Am I the only one who wants more? I feel like this is a good introduction to a good book. I now want chapters 1,2,3,... etc lol. As a male and father of two girls, I am very shocked by that fact that such diagrams are still absent from text books. That's scandalous really. I want and need a source of information on this topic to get better informed and, one day, when my girls are old enough, I will be able to point them in the right direction for the best information on the topic. Can anyone give me a good link? I haven't figured out how to google this topic without having issues finding good answers if you catch my drift... lol

    • @WomenofHighValue
      @WomenofHighValue 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      M You could start with my channels :) I do my best to explain after studying these subjects for years now. Understanding women is critical these days, as it always has been

    • @stef8434
      @stef8434 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      The speaker has written a book on this very subject, I'm sure if you Google her name you'll be able to find it :)

  • @dassiasalters8112
    @dassiasalters8112 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Are the transcripts of this available anywhere?

  • @etienneportail5122
    @etienneportail5122 ปีที่แล้ว

    Ohj, what a spontaneous speech..

  • @blackangel7370
    @blackangel7370 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    It is still unbelievable to me that we live in a modern world, yet in the best cases men still ask women about their bodies, although it should be public information at this point

  • @d.earth.angell
    @d.earth.angell 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Truly amazing❤

  • @ZorbaPress
    @ZorbaPress 5 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    Excellent talk, full of insights and humor -- thank you very much.

  • @valentinn3507
    @valentinn3507 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Awesome talk!

  • @manuelbrito8602
    @manuelbrito8602 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Quando e que a gente vai perceber que o mais importante no mundo e o dinheiro...e tudo anda a roda disso...

  • @narmeenulfdfd3993
    @narmeenulfdfd3993 4 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    Yes it’s complicated

  • @loopy2199
    @loopy2199 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I just wanna learn

  • @henrikibsen6258
    @henrikibsen6258 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    What I'm picking up is some hesitancy to define it might actually be a good thing.

  • @kamillaiqbal6521
    @kamillaiqbal6521 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Don't be ashamed to sleep with who u want, dress as u wish, whether the clothes are revealing or not....be yourself!

    • @Folomus
      @Folomus 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Interesting difference in perspective. Almost all the suggestions for men I see are around can be boiled down to "be better than you naturally are. Improve yourself." etc etc.

    • @BleezyMonkey
      @BleezyMonkey 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      as soon as you not making others sad, everybody free to do whatever they want

  • @leesway
    @leesway 6 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    Beautiful woman. Great speech. Made me think and my soul stir--pardon my hippiness.

  • @djn1822
    @djn1822 6 ปีที่แล้ว +28

    An important correction... male ejaculation, aka climax, is not the same as orgasm. An important correction for the comparison made to incite an unjust “orgasm” gap. Men, are also generally uneducated about their own bodies.

    • @aezakmei
      @aezakmei 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      About men being uneducated about their own bodies -- a lot of men and women think that circumcision does no harm, while foreskin is incredibly important for both.

  • @igotbluesdevils
    @igotbluesdevils 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    This was an amazing talk. Thank you.

  • @cspace1234nz
    @cspace1234nz 5 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    This video is perfect for all those women who never seem to find a relationship partner but are experts on relationships through their endless analysis.

    • @marinaalex0510
      @marinaalex0510 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Being a journalist and not an expert in the area she's touching on

  • @oaiaferoce
    @oaiaferoce 4 ปีที่แล้ว +23

    The problem is most women partner with men they're not attracted to physically. They may be attracted to them for other reasons and then lie to themselves and to others.

    • @nightshade7111
      @nightshade7111 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Or that most men just aren't attractive to women because they define attraction through their own lense.

    • @mephistopheles9644
      @mephistopheles9644 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@nightshade7111, how is attraction different for women as opposed to men?

  • @d.earth.angell
    @d.earth.angell 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

    essential!

  • @yourguidetolove7457
    @yourguidetolove7457 5 ปีที่แล้ว

    Great video!!!!!!

  • @sam21114
    @sam21114 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Nice facts. WAY more complicated than it is for men....and that is ok.

  • @taiquangong9912
    @taiquangong9912 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Damn!

  • @ronimorgan5722
    @ronimorgan5722 6 ปีที่แล้ว

    Nice...

  • @jeffreyrichardson
    @jeffreyrichardson 5 ปีที่แล้ว

    Scott

  • @agadurapparamachandra8291
    @agadurapparamachandra8291 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Sacred

  • @SpicyMcG
    @SpicyMcG 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Exactly. Bravo.

  • @jamesthornton9399
    @jamesthornton9399 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Do not we have enough people in the world.? As a guy, if you get enough denials of intrest then you say, I give up.

  • @iwasherenowiamnotok8893
    @iwasherenowiamnotok8893 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    Insert tab A into slot B,
    Ok I'm done, was it good for you?

  • @hjjjjk8399
    @hjjjjk8399 ปีที่แล้ว

    If a war comes men do not fight
    .

  • @Ez_32
    @Ez_32 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Aww I love this

    • @Ez_32
      @Ez_32 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Meaning I really appreciate the counter culture approach to things taken for granted by tradition

    • @Ez_32
      @Ez_32 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      The fight is great, keep fighting and I support

  • @joecho1427
    @joecho1427 5 ปีที่แล้ว

    Good.

  • @jamesthornton9399
    @jamesthornton9399 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    Did not know about the anatomy error.

  • @kuunami
    @kuunami 4 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    When you refuse to communicate your needs of course you'll be misunderstood.

    • @mikem6176
      @mikem6176 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      o. t. An “understanding partner” is every bit in the dark as a clueless oaf if she keeps her mouth shut.

  • @natrishkaTV
    @natrishkaTV 7 ปีที่แล้ว +38

    Great Talk !

  • @marctono1
    @marctono1 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    That circle is the same for men

    • @yasharpm
      @yasharpm 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Agreed!

    • @gioportu
      @gioportu 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Everyone knows that. Nearly everyone.

  • @antoinebguitar2869
    @antoinebguitar2869 ปีที่แล้ว

    Same way I want to want to go to school

  • @jinamatcharia8027
    @jinamatcharia8027 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    💜💜💜

  • @abhistraj4284
    @abhistraj4284 ปีที่แล้ว

    💯

  • @jarichards99utube
    @jarichards99utube 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Back in the day - there was a NAME for what we currently call "Pharmaceutical Drugs". It's a Very Old name that still applies to about 80 % of the drugs people take today. That name was - "SNAKE OIL"...!!!

  • @ingrid1710
    @ingrid1710 6 ปีที่แล้ว +129

    Comments: men complaining the she didn't talked about man too, men complaining about "women being to complicated". Funny

    • @elroycannon4265
      @elroycannon4265 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Adiel Esdras I don’t think she’s trying to simplify because she’s telling it how she sees it She isn’t telling it at a simplified way because she doesn’t think it needs to be simplified for people to understand that it isn’t complicated and I understand that it’s a bit hard to get her point with all she says though

    • @steffenkahrpedersen8258
      @steffenkahrpedersen8258 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Ingrid Oliveira I believe that 'sad' would be a better choice of word then 'funny'.

    • @harrynac6017
      @harrynac6017 5 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Ingrid Oliveira - And men complaining about "women always complaining"

    • @quincysimpson4033
      @quincysimpson4033 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Ingrid Oliveira isn’t this what feminists do all the time? I’m just saying

    • @harrynac6017
      @harrynac6017 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Ingrid Oliveira - see 😂

  • @pinfold1000
    @pinfold1000 6 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    101 ejaculation is not orgasm.

    • @adielwilson8749
      @adielwilson8749 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      So true and they are levels to orgasm as well

    • @Ilikefrogs..
      @Ilikefrogs.. 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      It really isn't.

  • @ronruddick2972
    @ronruddick2972 5 ปีที่แล้ว

    One pill? I prefer conceptualizing regiments

  • @CutTheFat
    @CutTheFat 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    For some reason she sounds a LOT like Helen Hunt to me. :)

  • @jeffreyrichardson
    @jeffreyrichardson 5 ปีที่แล้ว

    Michael Douglas Jody

  • @ferociousgumby
    @ferociousgumby 6 ปีที่แล้ว +49

    Use your hand, it's your best friend. It has known you forever.

    • @ViolaHGlaze
      @ViolaHGlaze 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      ferociousgumby ....😁😂

    • @burkeyatm
      @burkeyatm 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      ferociousgumby I’ve often wondered if the modern vibrator has altered the way women learn their bodies 🤷‍♂️

    • @jerryw6952
      @jerryw6952 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      What's modern about it?
      I thought the old one was a horse...
      (SpellCorrectingHumour: House 🏠 works as an aphrodisiac, afaict)

    • @tulipchic34
      @tulipchic34 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      For sure!!!

    • @marinaalex0510
      @marinaalex0510 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@burkeyatm I think some of them have been designed that way

  • @muhammadmafaz8530
    @muhammadmafaz8530 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    What does she say?

  • @GreenTara2010
    @GreenTara2010 6 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    Very informative and empowering video, really glad I stumbled upon it.

  • @michaelyates5976
    @michaelyates5976 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    I think she was just advertising her book here.

  • @bbbeno
    @bbbeno 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Wise lady. Nice food for thought.

  • @BEERFEST07
    @BEERFEST07 4 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    Someone get her a glass of water.

  • @marwanthekirby2596
    @marwanthekirby2596 4 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    I found this by searching how to understand women..

    • @kionnakelly2918
      @kionnakelly2918 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      It's a great start 😂

    • @mikem6176
      @mikem6176 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Don’t waste your time. The goalposts are on wheels.

    • @Fargnarglethethird
      @Fargnarglethethird 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@mikem6176 big dum dum

    • @gf6x3gkmfw38
      @gf6x3gkmfw38 ปีที่แล้ว

      ​@@mikem6176 no bitches?

  • @Ch-or4lm
    @Ch-or4lm 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Great video!

  • @JohnJohansen2
    @JohnJohansen2 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    I didn't understand?

  • @devinagrace1999
    @devinagrace1999 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Mam, you did not talk about the men who don't care, what do men need to understand about our bodies?

  • @technoverse101
    @technoverse101 4 ปีที่แล้ว +23

    Female physicians and psychiatrists have been around for decades. They had every opportunity to figure this stuff out. I wonder they didn't .

  • @johnsiegfried
    @johnsiegfried 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Excellent!

  • @tengkuizdihar
    @tengkuizdihar 5 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    Do you know what's complicated? Javascript's loop.

    • @ColtraneTaylor
      @ColtraneTaylor 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Ted Talk women are a Javascript loop.

    • @brandonkellner2920
      @brandonkellner2920 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      What's complicated about it? What loop are you comparing it to?

    • @guangluwan3205
      @guangluwan3205 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Absolutely.

  • @rudraom9
    @rudraom9 5 ปีที่แล้ว

    Sorry for waiting darling sweetheart love u take care God bless u ..... Rohit Goswami Delhi

  • @boduholm8463
    @boduholm8463 ปีที่แล้ว

    You miss used the phrase happy ending.

  • @FlyingElvis1000
    @FlyingElvis1000 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    What did women say in the early 1900's?

  • @bakekay21
    @bakekay21 ปีที่แล้ว

    Note:
    climax isn't orgasm.
    Orgasm is the "let down" after the Peak.

  • @q1w2e3r4t5y629
    @q1w2e3r4t5y629 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    What does the i stand for?

    • @cecile9239
      @cecile9239 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Intersex

    • @mikem6176
      @mikem6176 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      “I dunno.”

  • @knixie
    @knixie 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Every time I see one of these talks, I simply replace women/female/girl with everyone. After that it makes sense, and I really get behind the message.

    • @Niilleeyy
      @Niilleeyy 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      🙄🙄🙄

  • @WomenofHighValue
    @WomenofHighValue 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    You got it right! Awesome

  • @adqueen2548
    @adqueen2548 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    She's so awsome!!!!!!

  • @malcode9155
    @malcode9155 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Titus: "Also, very important. When you couple with her there's this spot just above her cunny. It's like a button. Now, attend to that button and she will open up like a flower."
    Lucius: "How do you know this about her!?"
    Titus: "All women have them! Ask anyone!"

  • @122scorpio5
    @122scorpio5 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Is it wrong watching this at 15?🤔

  • @livingstranger
    @livingstranger 6 ปีที่แล้ว +95

    Why not just tell men then. The idea that most men don't care about the woman's pleasure isn't true.

    • @elenaduran5174
      @elenaduran5174 6 ปีที่แล้ว +54

      @ livingstranger. I don't think that's the problem. The problem is that many men feel insulted that women would try to speak to them about these things. If a man really loves you and wants to please you, he won't feel insulted but will take the advice on work on it. But there are many men with egos who would feel insulted.

    • @mick776gold
      @mick776gold 6 ปีที่แล้ว +31

      I don't feel insulted. My experience is that women will not share, maybe... because they do not even understand themselves. But the women who did know themselves, and knew how to tell me, were by FAR my favorite and the most fun ;)

    • @guppy2686
      @guppy2686 6 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      It might be rare but the women i've been with sure had no problem telling me what they liked and what they didn't. I listened and adjusted ofcourse because i loved them and would've done anything within my power to make them happy.
      This is every man i know.

    • @slardebard
      @slardebard 5 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      @@elenaduran5174 that has not been my experience. I would relish the communication. I think this is an excuse women use for a failure to communicate.

    • @kingspeech2240
      @kingspeech2240 5 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Elena Duran no ma’am I love feedback most men do women reach climax differently than men do etc most men want a woman to talk about what she wants it’s extremely important for y’all to talk to us we aren’t mind readers but the same is true that some men aren’t concerned with the woman’s pleasure in contrast to his own