I really hate it when someone politely asks you a question and you can tell by their dead eyes and posture they really don't care what the answer is, even before you've started speaking.
Jay, yes, it is like shaking hands with someone and they look at someone else while they are shaking your hand. This happened to me once and I kicked the person in the shin, he looked at me right quick after that. Another one that gets me going is if someone asks you how you are and you say "not that well" and they distractedly say "that's great". Since that happened to me I always ask back if they are really interested in hearing the full story. That usually makes them stop and think as well.
They may have their own insecurities. The fact that they are trying to be nice, you have to appreciate. People need to stop being judgemental towards each other.
@@Endrance450 but that's so meaningless if you want to say hello more personally then mean it with your gestures or tone of your voice. I still can't get used to being asked how I am and consider it as a "hello"
Completely remembered why I used to be so confident. I was so much fun! I was unpredictable, funny, goofy and knew it. Anymore, I'm thinking my losses have stolen those things and that's why I'm alone so much. I need to remember myself and be more positive. Thanks for this Vanessa!
instead of: 1. what do you do? 2. where are you from? 3. how are you? try: 1. working on anything exciting these days? 2. have any vacations coming up? 3. anything good happen today. this is gold.
instead of: 1. What do you do? 2. Where are you from? 3. How are you? try: 1. How do you do? 2. What are you from? 3. Where are you? This is going to get a lot of people around you nervous and concerned, unless you talk in a very hippie/hipster sort of way. But if your smooth on the first one, sound genuinely perplexed mixed with time-constrained on the second, and scream the last one whilst looking them dead in the eyes then you've hit maximum effect! or try: 1. Do you do what? 2. Are you from where? 3. You are how?
If a guy at a party approached me for the first time with one of these sentences I would think he is being weird. If a girl did so, I'd think she's hitting on me
@Chris Jones I'm genuinely interested in your opinions on this as I'm a high school humanities student. What kinds of ideas or opportunities or information or anything do you think are worth discovering and exploring within the broad field?
Her presence already made me excited. Her aura her spirit and her enthusiasm, they're definitely contagious. And for those looking for going viral kind of thing, what matters is she did her best and you could see it. Real life events don't look for statistical figures but more on meaningful impact. Love her already.
I saw an old movie where one person looked to the sky and he attracted a multitude of people doing the same thing. They had no idea what they were looking for but they just following his actions.
I'm surprised that people aren't familiar with this. When I was a child (late 1960s), my father related a story about how he was in town and decided to see if he could get other people to do something, just because he was. In front of a movie theater, just as people were leaving, he looked intently at a point in the sky. Soon, a whole crowd began looking. He said that after enough people were looking, he stopped and walked a short way, so he could watch and listen. Humorously enough, eventually someone asked "what are we looking at?" There were a number of responses, that included "an airplane," and someone even mentioned that a man was staring into the sky and they looked, hoping to see what had caught his attention. As a result, I have repeated this experiment and it's always a lot of fun!
@@1TheShawnster Agree! as a teen in the early 70's a group of us band geeks would do this in downtown Milwaukee just to see what would happen. Always brought a smile to us but most of the time when someone would ask what we were all looking at, we'd say 'nothing, just stopping to enjoy the sky'. They would smile and walk away. Great feeling!
Key points: use more hand gestures, ask more dopamine worthy questions, make authentic smiles and never pick up the phone in a bad mood. "We are in control of how we feel and what we want to spread." THANK YOU FOR SHARING!
Guys, while reading the comments you will notice something : There's no hateful comments. At all. And I know it because I've read them all. So this is true : This lady has increased our dopamine, we all feel happy and excited ! Let's show this to the whole world 😉💪🏻
I think Vanessa Van Edwards is one of the best TED speakers. The content is great for sure, but as far as delivery and confidence, I haven't seen better. She is a pleasure to listen and watch.
I’ve never seen anyone that looked and presented themselves so genuine that not once did I feel a negative or an uncomfortable emotion while watching this!! I REALLY like her energy:)
Such an entertaining and informative talk! My takeaways: - our emotions are contagious, so others will pick up on how we feel - facial expressions + body language can be THE TRIGGER for your emotional reality, instead of just vice versa! - frame dialogue/questions in terms of positive words instead of negative or empty ones. - all this makes me realize, I need to do power poses + affirmations more!
"If we show up to events we are ambivalent about, interact with people we don't really like, we become less memorable." This sentence will stay with me. Exceptionally good talk.
It makes sense, like when me or my friends are laughing and smiling, somehow everyone just gets into the mood and we’re all happy and giggling, even when we dunno what’s happening.
My wife sent me this, and she got it from a podcast referral, and I have to admit... this really explains a lot for me. Man, it's time to get to work! Waiting for a part 2 or book or more in-depth information. Appreciate it over all and best wishes
Love that final line Vanessa - we are in control of how we feel and what we want to spread. Really locks into the internal locus of control in a way that is explainable :)
You can tell that Vanessa Van Edwards practices what she preaches. She is a very dynamic speaker and engages then captivates you immediately to the end of her speech/message. Mahalos Vanessa!
My friend says that she can just feel it when im in a room without even seeing me because its just full of joy and positivity - bruh i thought she was going mad: now i dont wow
This is hands down my favourite Ted talk and I've watched a lot. I use facts from this to start conversations and it's honestly changed how I view and interact with people. Amazing 👏
“The only difference between nervousness and excitement is the mindset.” I pushed myself to try believing in this perspective and can personally attest that my perspective has slowly but surely changed. Now when the adrenaline kicks in, my mind makes note that it is indeed excitement!
So proud of you Vanessa! What a year you're having! Another amazing CreativeLive, a best selling book, and a perfectly delivered (and informative, funny, and inspiring) TEDX talk! You continue to inspire and "infect" us with your work! Keep it up! ❤️Your fan from Key West!
Whenever I search for any ted talk .I just choose one and then play it.What keeps me listen to that ted talk is just the speech.I mean to say that how clearly the idea has been delivered by a ted talker interest me to listen to the whole talk without even looking at the person talking.
16:54 Is a huge moment in this talk; a belief I decoded on my own, simply reframing your mindset can shift, like a panoramic camera, the scope of possibility for one who is faced with a difficult decision. Excitement with comfortable acceptance of un-intended failure and full openness to learn.
I recently met my thesis mentor and I gave her this compliment that her energy is contagious because she is really exciting architect and a great mentor!!😍
Right after I listened to your talk a moment ago, I received a phone call from someone I had some tensions with earlier today. So, I did exactly what you recommended. I made my voice gently cheerful. I told him I liked his shirt, which I truly meant, and continued with some additional sincere small talk. The tensions disappeared and we left the conversations smiling. I’m certain my tone of voice at the onset of the conversation set the tone for the positive. Fun to have the experience right after your talk. Thanks Vanessa!
Most of the time when I do watch video to learn new things...it helps to improve my self. But here... absolututley next level which is hit me like, this is what I was looking for.....Great Speech...wow...loved it. Vanessa so perfect speaker for me at time of writing.
My sister started waiting tables at a restaurant that drew people from three and four hours away. People with money. She started comparing her tips with others and saw she was not getting near the tips. My dad managed this restaurant and tourist/history demonstration center. He was in the restaurant only an hour or so each day. After a week my sister complained. My dad started observing her and after a couple hours he pulled her aside and said, SMILE WHEN YOU ARE AT THE TABLE... she didn't agree that week. He talked to her on the weekend and convinced her to truly smile and test it for a week. She almost tripled her tips.
I love this woman, she’s so beautiful, not just her looks but her confidence and personality. She’s so knowledgeable and I love her videos, they really do help💗
Absolutely wonderful!!! I've been teaching business etiquette and social skills for years and this is just the information that we all need. Thank you!
This explains the "aura" thing. People with good aura, are more attractive and more pleasant to keep close. While people with bad aura (emotions, attitude) are often labeled as toxic people that drain the energy out of you. I have finally learned to spot them and i am trying for quite some time now, to avoid them. Also i am trying to become more positive myself.
Thank you so much for the insight! I never realized some of these tactics. Some of them I've employed throughout my years working customer service, without realizing. Such as asking people if they have any fun or exciting plans. Or asking them to tell me about something they've been really passionate about. I will definitely employ more of these strategies and try to be contagious to my coworkers.
Vanessa, this is such a memorable TED talk. Thank you for equipping me with a set of skills that I will use, for the good of all, the rest of my life ❤
When I was 25, my bff the day he suddenly got into. Wreck & later passed told me that I was "contagious" ...it never left my mind...I felt understood yet confused. Best thing I have ever been called! He was amazing.
I absolutely love how she takes common sense things we don’t really even realize is right in front of our face. And I’ve just started watching her videos and it led me here. Love her!!!
Hey, thanks a lot. Looking forward for more such videos. My friend said I had a drastic change in my voice and and sounded more confident and all that was by listening to this one video. It means a lot to me. I'm very grateful. Wish luck and happiness
Actually yes as an unarmed security officer in Culver city DMV in CA... well the mood at the place was less than positive, in the morning when people are lining up an hr before the DMV opens was the worst that is when i started doing what she was talking about. I was rationalizing to them saying that this is the best time to be here and smiling. I wasnt fake smiling it was real and went around talking to people with that smile the rest of the 8 hrs. The next day i came back with a big smile on my face for another 8. The next day when I was closing I actually had 3 of the DMV associates come up to me after closing and thanked me. And I said for what, they said ever since I started people were treating them better. This was 10 years ago but what she says is 100% accurate.
Vanessa seems awesome but whenever I see someone who knows so much about human behavior and how to manipulate it to get people to talk to you/like you etc, it makes me not trust them bc it feels like every word/expression they make is calculated and inauthentic. Maybe that’s just me idk
I see where you're coming from. But much about authentic human expression and behavior is conducted on a subconscious level -- it's involuntary. So if a body language expert comes off as inauthentic to you, it's probably because they are; and you'd be right, their actions are calculated, and completely conscious; they have an agenda to manipulate. It's immensely more difficult to spoof subconscious, genuine expression, because it happens involuntarily, usually before our conscious brain registers it happening. Unless you're a psychopath, I suppose. :/
Omg, this video has changed the way I perceive people and I am very much sure that its going to be very much helpful. "I am Excited". Great talk and lucky i am that i found this one. You Rock Vanessa. Many Congratulations to you and your team. I have been watching your videos on science of people and now following you on TH-cam so can watch all your exciting videos. Looking forward to have some great learning.
I was watching other interesting Ted Talks and I was about to search for another video and her video started I did not search for the other video, she got me right from second one, she's great
Hi Vanessa! I'm so grateful for the material you share. I am an ESL teacher and have used several of your videos to teach my students not only verbal English but other communication mediums as well. Truly great work and best of luck on your continued success! Teacher Lisa :-)
One of the more better ted talks I've seen. A lot of information that we don't really take into consideration that shape not just our day but the day of others.
Changed my life! Henceforward, I will be hilarious, excited, funny, energetic, and charismatic. I want to change my life as well as others' life for good.
🎯 Key Takeaways for quick navigation: 00:00 😄 Vanessa Van Edwards discusses the impact of body language and behavior on perception. 01:32 🤚 When meeting people, the first thing we unconsciously focus on is their hands due to our primal instincts. 03:02 🗣️ Successful TED speakers use numerous hand gestures (465 on average) to engage and emphasize their ideas. 05:02 😨 Emotions are contagious; for instance, smelling sweat from fearful individuals triggered fear responses in others. 08:13 😀 Mimicking facial expressions, such as genuine happiness, influences our emotions and likability. 11:51 🎤 Conversation starters that trigger dopamine (e.g., excitement-focused questions) create more engaging interactions. 16:29 😊 Shifting from nervous to excited mindset improves performance and accuracy in challenging tasks. Made with HARPA AI
On one hand, this is really cool information, and it'll be cool to hear what else they find out! On the other, I'm admittedly scared of how this information might be twisted and used as a club for people who have legitimate reasons they're not happy. I know that multiple people, relatives, judges, (non-psych) doctors, told me stuff like "You just need to be more positive! Chin up! You're too young to be depressed!" and.....if you're chemically depressed, that can be utterly useless. If you're in chronic pain, that's useless. If you're in a severely abusive situation and can't leave, that's useless. And I was all of those. Chemically depressed, chronically ill and in pain, while the family members I relied on abused and gaslighted me. And remembering how they treated any science that (could be twisted to look like) it agreed with them, it was used often as a reason why being depressed was my own fault, with all that includes. And it was only until I was able to escape with a friend to support me, that I was able to get real treatment, and get enough mental pressure off my brain that I could be actually happy. I guess I just wish she'd included something about the limitations of this.
Thanks for the interesting TEDx. I got hooked on the Science of People after reading your book "Human Lie Detection & Body Language 101" and am looking forward to reading Contagious and taking a few of your courses.
I feel My specific anxiety effects the way i smile. Its almost like im in constant painand the "pain"is constantly keep me from smiling fully. Or too much
That's my niece!!!! Uncle is sooooo proud!
yes, she is amazing!
Can I use SS?
You have a reeeeeeaaallyyyyy cute niece...
Dont look at me Vanessa..look at him! Im ur uncle! U remember that?
Wow... I find it mindblowing that she's related to one of the pioneers of pick up. Lovely.
"Anxiety and excitement are very similar emotions, the only difference is the mindset" this is gold ❤️
Right!? I thought, “wow” I’ve never heard that perspective before. I love it
yes right? fascinating :-)
Why is this gold? How can I apply that fact to improve my life?
@@beppobarrendero74 You can try to start changing your mindset)))
I totally agree with you. Great message 🥰🥰❤❤
I really hate it when someone politely asks you a question and you can tell by their dead eyes and posture they really don't care what the answer is, even before you've started speaking.
Jay, yes, it is like shaking hands with someone and they look at someone else while they are shaking your hand. This happened to me once and I kicked the person in the shin, he looked at me right quick after that. Another one that gets me going is if someone asks you how you are and you say "not that well" and they distractedly say "that's great". Since that happened to me I always ask back if they are really interested in hearing the full story. That usually makes them stop and think as well.
They may have their own insecurities. The fact that they are trying to be nice, you have to appreciate. People need to stop being judgemental towards each other.
Why do you think they don't care? Maybe they are anxious to talk or ask you because you are not welcoming?
@@Endrance450 but that's so meaningless if you want to say hello more personally then mean it with your gestures or tone of your voice. I still can't get used to being asked how I am and consider it as a "hello"
J B Hehe me😏 I mostly ask things for the purpose of asking something😄😄
she's basically teaching everyone how to do ted talk the most effective way on stage. she's amazing!
Thank you so much!
Did she just teach me PEOPLE skills in 3 simple ways? OMG!!! I am going to start asking those questions!!!!!
❤😍
@@ScienceOfPeopletanks a lot ❤
🎉❤🎉
Completely remembered why I used to be so confident. I was so much fun! I was unpredictable, funny, goofy and knew it. Anymore, I'm thinking my losses have stolen those things and that's why I'm alone so much. I need to remember myself and be more positive. Thanks for this Vanessa!
I relate to this so hard.
Shannon Feyhl the thing is, we can't fake happiness
@@JELAJAHSEMESTA-u2h Oh but you can... I did it for years with my ex! 🤣
Amanda Burkhart did it work?
@@JELAJAHSEMESTA-u2h Haha, it did until it didn't. 😉
instead of:
1. what do you do?
2. where are you from?
3. how are you?
try:
1. working on anything exciting these days?
2. have any vacations coming up?
3. anything good happen today.
this is gold.
I'm trying that it sound effective and it really might work
instead of:
1. What do you do?
2. Where are you from?
3. How are you?
try:
1. How do you do?
2. What are you from?
3. Where are you?
This is going to get a lot of people around you nervous and concerned, unless you talk in a very hippie/hipster sort of way. But if your smooth on the first one, sound genuinely perplexed mixed with time-constrained on the second, and scream the last one whilst looking them dead in the eyes then you've hit maximum effect!
or try:
1. Do you do what?
2. Are you from where?
3. You are how?
If a guy at a party approached me for the first time with one of these sentences I would think he is being weird. If a girl did so, I'd think she's hitting on me
Unless the answer is "no" to all three of those questions.
stop taking her fire, k?
psychology is soooo interesting and amazingly useful.
thanks me to
☺ Thank you.
@Chris Jones how is it often wrong? genuinely curious
@Chris Jones I'm genuinely interested in your opinions on this as I'm a high school humanities student. What kinds of ideas or opportunities or information or anything do you think are worth discovering and exploring within the broad field?
omg yesss❤️
This woman's clarity kills me!
Her words are so clear..
You know what else is clear?
@@kuwandak what? 😂
Thank you ❤
"you are contagious",the whole of 2020 and 2021 summed up.
lol
Totally random, but she is killing this dress. She looks great!
ok good, it wasnt just me
Honestly was very hard to listen to her when I glanced at the video. Very distracting 😍
You mean tearing it apart?
Meh, I thought the vest was on point..
Definitely!
Her presence already made me excited. Her aura her spirit and her enthusiasm, they're definitely contagious. And for those looking for going viral kind of thing, what matters is she did her best and you could see it. Real life events don't look for statistical figures but more on meaningful impact. Love her already.
she has amazing comedic timing
Yeah I liked her presentation but I felt like she was slightly over-exaggerating at times. Which is something a lot of Ted talkers do
Agree much bang bangability
Agreed
❤️
She’s awesome. The “looking at nothing” study was hilarious. I’m going to try that.
Yeah it's better to study the others things
@@vues-cf7zl yusuhaa i
I saw an old movie where one person looked to the sky and he attracted a multitude of people doing the same thing. They had no idea what they were looking for but they just following his actions.
I'm surprised that people aren't familiar with this. When I was a child (late 1960s), my father related a story about how he was in town and decided to see if he could get other people to do something, just because he was. In front of a movie theater, just as people were leaving, he looked intently at a point in the sky. Soon, a whole crowd began looking. He said that after enough people were looking, he stopped and walked a short way, so he could watch and listen. Humorously enough, eventually someone asked "what are we looking at?" There were a number of responses, that included "an airplane," and someone even mentioned that a man was staring into the sky and they looked, hoping to see what had caught his attention. As a result, I have repeated this experiment and it's always a lot of fun!
@@1TheShawnster Agree! as a teen in the early 70's a group of us band geeks would do this in downtown Milwaukee just to see what would happen. Always brought a smile to us but most of the time when someone would ask what we were all looking at, we'd say 'nothing, just stopping to enjoy the sky'. They would smile and walk away. Great feeling!
Key points: use more hand gestures, ask more dopamine worthy questions, make authentic smiles and never pick up the phone in a bad mood.
"We are in control of how we feel and what we want to spread." THANK YOU FOR SHARING!
Guys, while reading the comments you will notice something : There's no hateful comments. At all. And I know it because I've read them all. So this is true : This lady has increased our dopamine, we all feel happy and excited ! Let's show this to the whole world 😉💪🏻
True
I saw her in real life before she released her book. She's has a very genuine personality.
But does she? Or did she just infect you into thinking that?
psychology is soooo interesting and amazingly useful.
Really? You are so lucky. I hope I can meet with her
I think Vanessa Van Edwards is one of the best TED speakers. The content is great for sure, but as far as delivery and confidence, I haven't seen better. She is a pleasure to listen and watch.
She is really great person. She is my idol
Brené Brown is my #1, but this lady is a super close second! She’s fabulous!
Have you seen simón sinek? He's muy number 1 still
3:00
4:04
D fake
@@gonzaloenrique8741 He is really awesome too. Great choice!
I’ve never seen anyone that looked and presented themselves so genuine that not once did I feel a negative or an uncomfortable emotion while watching this!! I REALLY like her energy:)
Me too. She is perfect
she is positive and charming
Takeaway: open hands, dopamine-worthy conversation and authentic smile makes your more memorable and viral for sure..☺️
Such an entertaining and informative talk! My takeaways:
- our emotions are contagious, so others will pick up on how we feel
- facial expressions + body language can be THE TRIGGER for your emotional reality, instead of just vice versa!
- frame dialogue/questions in terms of positive words instead of negative or empty ones.
- all this makes me realize, I need to do power poses + affirmations more!
Excellent takeaways! I'm so glad you enjoyed ❤
"If we show up to events we are ambivalent about, interact with people we don't really like, we become less memorable." This sentence will stay with me. Exceptionally good talk.
she's so beautiful and charismatic
fact
It makes sense, like when me or my friends are laughing and smiling, somehow everyone just gets into the mood and we’re all happy and giggling, even when we dunno what’s happening.
Yeah also she looks shy anything or no
Ccxx
Ccxxx
Is it normal that I kept smiling throughout this TED Talk. This is amazing stuff to learn.
My wife sent me this, and she got it from a podcast referral, and I have to admit... this really explains a lot for me. Man, it's time to get to work! Waiting for a part 2 or book or more in-depth information. Appreciate it over all and best wishes
So glad this was really helpful for you! 🙏🏻
Awkward girl blossomed into a brilliant, beautiful, sincere lady 😉
And in ten years will meet the Wall.
Bob Bobb oh Bob, bad Bob what have they done to, for you to be so cynical? Thankfully your unhappyness is not contagious.
@@bobbobb2322 lmfao
I initially read "sincere lady" as "science lady" and hey it's technically true
Pokémon
Love that final line Vanessa - we are in control of how we feel and what we want to spread. Really locks into the internal locus of control in a way that is explainable :)
This talk is literally a gift to humanity
This goes to the top ted talks no doubt, Vanessa you shook the dust out of our heads in an unique way, thank u
Thank you ❤
You can tell that Vanessa Van Edwards practices what she preaches. She is a very dynamic speaker and engages then captivates you immediately to the end of her speech/message. Mahalos Vanessa!
"I'm excited" too! Great talk! Congratulations. I'm now listening to your audiobook and am getting so much of it. Big fan!
Sebastián Lora which audiobook? :)
Who cares 😋
I loved it and on the hunt for more from you Vanessa. Super inspired and excited 😊Best TED talk ever!!!
@@olashalaby5082 Hiii how are you??
Sebastián Lora I have the book (not audio)!
My friend says that she can just feel it when im in a room without even seeing me because its just full of joy and positivity - bruh i thought she was going mad: now i dont wow
That's legit the best quality to have! Kudos to you!
I love her energy! It is contagious! That’s what make this talk more exciting to watch!
True 😊😊
This is hands down my favourite Ted talk and I've watched a lot. I use facts from this to start conversations and it's honestly changed how I view and interact with people. Amazing 👏
I’m so happy to hear this! Thanks for watching 🙏🏻
“The only difference between nervousness and excitement is the mindset.”
I pushed myself to try believing in this perspective and can personally attest that my perspective has slowly but surely changed. Now when the adrenaline kicks in, my mind makes note that it is indeed excitement!
Vanessa has a soft voice. It was such a pleasure to hear her. She is contagious. Congratulations! 👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏
I've become a memorable communicator over the years and do all the things mentioned in this talk. Love the research to back up what I do. Thank you.
So proud of you Vanessa! What a year you're having! Another amazing CreativeLive, a best selling book, and a perfectly delivered (and informative, funny, and inspiring) TEDX talk! You continue to inspire and "infect" us with your work! Keep it up! ❤️Your fan from Key West!
This might be one of the best TED talks I've watched so far
That means so much to me! Thank you! 💛💛
Whenever I search for any ted talk .I just choose one and then play it.What keeps me listen to that ted talk is just the speech.I mean to say that how clearly the idea has been delivered by a ted talker interest me to listen to the whole talk without even looking at the person talking.
I absolutely loved it! I have learned so much from Vanessa over the years!
You're so welcome!
Terrence Burton &
16:54 Is a huge moment in this talk; a belief I decoded on my own, simply reframing your mindset can shift, like a panoramic camera, the scope of possibility for one who is faced with a difficult decision.
Excitement with comfortable acceptance of un-intended failure and full openness to learn.
I recently met my thesis mentor and I gave her this compliment that her energy is contagious because she is really exciting architect and a great mentor!!😍
Right after I listened to your talk a moment ago, I received a phone call from someone I had some tensions with earlier today. So, I did exactly what you recommended. I made my voice gently cheerful. I told him I liked his shirt, which I truly meant, and continued with some additional sincere small talk. The tensions disappeared and we left the conversations smiling. I’m certain my tone of voice at the onset of the conversation set the tone for the positive. Fun to have the experience right after your talk. Thanks Vanessa!
She is definitely a good speaker. We Italians have been using hand gestures for centuries along with facial expressions. :))
"I am excited !" Such a great advice when I am feeling nervous about upcoming presentation. Awesome!
Most of the time when I do watch video to learn new things...it helps to improve my self. But here... absolututley next level which is hit me like, this is what I was looking for.....Great Speech...wow...loved it. Vanessa so perfect speaker for me at time of writing.
lol I only realized I listened to her audiobook in the middle of the talk. She's hypnotizing when you actually see her.
My sister started waiting tables at a restaurant that drew people from three and four hours away. People with money. She started comparing her tips with others and saw she was not getting near the tips. My dad managed this restaurant and tourist/history demonstration center. He was in the restaurant only an hour or so each day. After a week my sister complained. My dad started observing her and after a couple hours he pulled her aside and said, SMILE WHEN YOU ARE AT THE TABLE... she didn't agree that week. He talked to her on the weekend and convinced her to truly smile and test it for a week. She almost tripled her tips.
she speaks out Gold and Diamond..Vanessa Edwards , you're the best at this.
One of the best TED talks I've seen in a long while. Thank you TH-cam algorithm and thank you Vanessa!
I love this woman, she’s so beautiful, not just her looks but her confidence and personality. She’s so knowledgeable and I love her videos, they really do help💗
*puts hand on chest* I truly love your work Vanessa! You're an inspiration to *waves hands in opposite direction* millions of people around the world!
Hector Mayoral hey listen I know I’m a year late but...
Why are you touching her chest?!🤔
Absolutely wonderful!!! I've been teaching business etiquette and social skills for years and this is just the information that we all need. Thank you!
Saying "I am excited" does work. Every show I did after saying that was that much more successful! Self talk is real yall! Use it
I am preparing for my final interview, and I feel nervous about it. But I would rather say, I am excited! Thank you Vanessa! You rock!
Did you get the job?
Well did uuu
This explains the "aura" thing. People with good aura, are more attractive and more pleasant to keep close. While people with bad aura (emotions, attitude) are often labeled as toxic people that drain the energy out of you. I have finally learned to spot them and i am trying for quite some time now, to avoid them. Also i am trying to become more positive myself.
OMG. This is literally the first TED Talk I have ever seen that doesn't end with "Thank You"😱! I have been waiting for this moment forever!
Thank you so much for the insight! I never realized some of these tactics. Some of them I've employed throughout my years working customer service, without realizing. Such as asking people if they have any fun or exciting plans. Or asking them to tell me about something they've been really passionate about. I will definitely employ more of these strategies and try to be contagious to my coworkers.
So amazing! A conglomerate of wonderful social psychological research in a coherent, well flowing, and entertaining delivery. Love love love this!
Vanessa, this is such a memorable TED talk. Thank you for equipping me with a set of skills that I will use, for the good of all, the rest of my life ❤
It’s my absolute pleasure ❤️ thank you for being on this journey with me!
I absolutely love all her work, research and the way she shares it with the world. Such an inspiring woman.
Exciting, exhilarating and encouraging expressions that serve as an elixir to human spirit. Thanks Vanessa.
She's absolutely phenomenal, specially what she said at the end. You rockTED a truly astounding woman.
When I was 25, my bff the day he suddenly got into. Wreck & later passed told me that I was "contagious" ...it never left my mind...I felt understood yet confused. Best thing I have ever been called! He was amazing.
I absolutely love how she takes common sense things we don’t really even realize is right in front of our face. And I’ve just started watching her videos and it led me here. Love her!!!
This woman is a genius
Yeah, and drop-dead gorgeous ; )
Hey, thanks a lot. Looking forward for more such videos. My friend said I had a drastic change in my voice and and sounded more confident and all that was by listening to this one video. It means a lot to me. I'm very grateful. Wish luck and happiness
She got us a the End... She Said "You Rocked it" and instantly, we are thinking that SHE rocked it. THANK YOU for your lesson!
This has to be one of THE best Ted talks ever! 🙏
Lol so people are smelling my social anxieties
Your anxiety is creating a chain reaction of anxiety in others. It is a chaos theory, one individual can destabilize entire community.
We know that emotions are contagious.
Pheromones ya?
Basically yeah. And when you think about that too much then it'll get worse
Actually yes as an unarmed security officer in Culver city DMV in CA... well the mood at the place was less than positive, in the morning when people are lining up an hr before the DMV opens was the worst that is when i started doing what she was talking about. I was rationalizing to them saying that this is the best time to be here and smiling. I wasnt fake smiling it was real and went around talking to people with that smile the rest of the 8 hrs. The next day i came back with a big smile on my face for another 8. The next day when I was closing I actually had 3 of the DMV associates come up to me after closing and thanked me. And I said for what, they said ever since I started people were treating them better.
This was 10 years ago but what she says is 100% accurate.
Vanessa seems awesome but whenever I see someone who knows so much about human behavior and how to manipulate it to get people to talk to you/like you etc, it makes me not trust them bc it feels like every word/expression they make is calculated and inauthentic. Maybe that’s just me idk
I agree, it comes off as fake, and not trustworthy.
I see where you're coming from. But much about authentic human expression and behavior is conducted on a subconscious level -- it's involuntary. So if a body language expert comes off as inauthentic to you, it's probably because they are; and you'd be right, their actions are calculated, and completely conscious; they have an agenda to manipulate. It's immensely more difficult to spoof subconscious, genuine expression, because it happens involuntarily, usually before our conscious brain registers it happening.
Unless you're a psychopath, I suppose. :/
I did some research on her and her book talks about genuine expression and focuses on how to be captivating without losing authenticity
My sentitments exactly! But knowing these things still help
Hi
Omg, this video has changed the way I perceive people and I am very much sure that its going to be very much helpful. "I am Excited". Great talk and lucky i am that i found this one. You Rock Vanessa. Many Congratulations to you and your team. I have been watching your videos on science of people and now following you on TH-cam so can watch all your exciting videos. Looking forward to have some great learning.
I was watching other interesting Ted Talks and I was about to search for another video and her video started I did not search for the other video, she got me right from second one, she's great
So happy to hear that! ❤
Hi Vanessa! I'm so grateful for the material you share. I am an ESL teacher and have used several of your videos to teach my students not only verbal English but other communication mediums as well. Truly great work and best of luck on your continued success! Teacher Lisa :-)
Hey! What could be more contagious than this tedtalk? Life changing! I'M EXCITED!!!!!!
you need to work on your english, English has much less excitement in it.
@@samurilip Are you trying to say English is a less-excitement
Language?🤔 I'm confused.
What a cool talk, love how everything she said came together at the end!
One of the more better ted talks I've seen. A lot of information that we don't really take into consideration that shape not just our day but the day of others.
Changed my life! Henceforward, I will be hilarious, excited, funny, energetic, and charismatic. I want to change my life as well as others' life for good.
Love to hear this!! 🙌
She never failed to show excitement from start to finish of her talk...that's why I was able to completely watched her TED talk. Nice one!!😊
You're the best Vanessa! Have become your fan in such a short time! You're very inspirational. And you rock 😊
Amazing! Vanessa does an excellent work and it's easy to see that she uses what research! Congratulations!
If you are Italian then you don't have to think about how to talk with your hands 🖐🙌
Yeah but I don't think that
The end where everyone’s yells “I’m exited”, I felt that!!!
She is fabulous. I loved her from the very first sentence. "Recovering awkward person" is hilarious!
I just gotta say you're my role model, I admire you so so much. Keep the good work. Thank you for the huge inspiration.
💞
Great job, Vanessa! I always enjoy listening to you and your research.
🎯 Key Takeaways for quick navigation:
00:00 😄 Vanessa Van Edwards discusses the impact of body language and behavior on perception.
01:32 🤚 When meeting people, the first thing we unconsciously focus on is their hands due to our primal instincts.
03:02 🗣️ Successful TED speakers use numerous hand gestures (465 on average) to engage and emphasize their ideas.
05:02 😨 Emotions are contagious; for instance, smelling sweat from fearful individuals triggered fear responses in others.
08:13 😀 Mimicking facial expressions, such as genuine happiness, influences our emotions and likability.
11:51 🎤 Conversation starters that trigger dopamine (e.g., excitement-focused questions) create more engaging interactions.
16:29 😊 Shifting from nervous to excited mindset improves performance and accuracy in challenging tasks.
Made with HARPA AI
Cool!
One of the best Ted talks I have come across! Very, very IMPACTFUL! Thank you Vanessa.
I like this topic and her content.She is amazing.
I appreciate that ❤
On one hand, this is really cool information, and it'll be cool to hear what else they find out!
On the other, I'm admittedly scared of how this information might be twisted and used as a club for people who have legitimate reasons they're not happy.
I know that multiple people, relatives, judges, (non-psych) doctors, told me stuff like "You just need to be more positive! Chin up! You're too young to be depressed!" and.....if you're chemically depressed, that can be utterly useless. If you're in chronic pain, that's useless. If you're in a severely abusive situation and can't leave, that's useless. And I was all of those. Chemically depressed, chronically ill and in pain, while the family members I relied on abused and gaslighted me. And remembering how they treated any science that (could be twisted to look like) it agreed with them, it was used often as a reason why being depressed was my own fault, with all that includes. And it was only until I was able to escape with a friend to support me, that I was able to get real treatment, and get enough mental pressure off my brain that I could be actually happy.
I guess I just wish she'd included something about the limitations of this.
Thanks for the interesting TEDx. I got hooked on the Science of People after reading your book "Human Lie Detection & Body Language 101" and am looking forward to reading Contagious and taking a few of your courses.
Seti Gershberg coffee room
I love Vanessa! I really felt the energy and I enjoyed the talk very much.
I agree
I love to make ppl smile. Some days its all I have to offer society.
She is a good body language traineer in english speaking country.i appreciate her technique how to start conversation with someone
"Is he gonna jump?" I was laughing so hard in that moment.
I feel My specific anxiety effects the way i smile. Its almost like im in constant painand the "pain"is constantly keep me from smiling fully. Or too much
dance. a lot. in what ever way you feel. shake that sh-t off
Same sometimes I just can't genuinely smile or if I do it'll just look akward
"Anxiety and excitement are very similar emotions".
Nice one:)!
I’ve been told you can hear my smile on the phone. I was asked one time if my happiness was real and I said yes!
She's indeed contagious to teach us about the matter.