I would love to hear your thoughts on going from enabling to imminity to narcissistic behaviors!!! And don't forget if my videos resonate with you - I have a membership where I meet LIVE weekly with survivors of emotional trauma from all over the world - we meet on zoom and we do the Cptsd Recovery work together to get US back!!! There is currently a 50% OFF SALE good through July 7, 2024. Here's the link for you to check it out and see if it's a good fit for you: www.micheleleenieves.com/offers/uJkkR2KT
@@Apple_45 - do you have a car? Make plans to get out, don’t tell anyone. Don’t think just do- put one foot in front of the other. It will be hard but gets easier. Seeing is the first step.
@@michaelgarrow3239 technically no, my dad who seems to fit the malignant narcissistic traits “bought” me a car but it’s really for him. I currently am getting my license tho, so I wouldn’t be able to drive anywhere anyway. I would definitely have to suck up to him to get car privileges, there’s no doubt he would use it against me if I don’t accept his abuse.
The only way to take control from a narcissist is to get yourself from their domain first. You wont be able to figure out anything until and unless you are out of the hellish world. I will tell you one of my favourite stories. Once a King was too disturbed by everything that was happening around him. He felt as if no one was loyal to him and he was always afraid of his kingdom being attacked by perpetrators. He lost his sleep and his life had become hell. So he thought of taking a brief sojourn in the countryside. He passed through lush green fields and picturesque landscapes. The silent breeze that brushed through his hair filled his heart with joy. That is when he saw a farmer who was putting fence around his farmland. But his farmland had weeds all over and they hardly had any crops. This intrigued the King. He asked the farmer as to why was he putting a fence around the farm when the farm itself was covered with weeds. To this the farmer said that the farm was his own so he could get rid of the weeds whenever he liked. But he cant stop the stray dogs from running over his fields and destroying them. That is why he was putting the fence. To stop the stray dogs from venturing into the field. Once he was very assured about the security of his fields he can work on clearing the weeds and planting crops. On hearing this the King somewhat got the answer which he had been searching for. The human mind is also like the field. You cant control assholes from fiddling with your mind or saying bullshit. But you can definitely put a fence ( figuratively) so that these assholes cant influence you. And until and unless you dont put a fence you can never work on yourself. Once you have distanced yourself from toxic people then you can work on the healing process. Same is the case with narcs. Narcs are these stray dogs who suck your energy emotionally. They play mind games for fun because their mind wants melodrama. They hurt the very people who love them. So total isolation from these narcs is absolutely essential for the well being of your Mind. Once you are out of their mind games you can take decisions rationally. Narcs try to drain you emotionally. So everytime you respond to their low vibrations you tend to come to their level. But when you react confidently without panicking and without responding to their negative vibrations that is when you Win. When someone realises that you arent being influenced or being manipulated by their actions they will get tired of it. And after cutting them off completely from your lives you should work on your healing process. Work on clearing your mental clutter and keep yourself preoccupied. Read books and most importantly try to find your Purpose in life. When you find your Purpose you will be able to bear any pain in this World. Most importantly help others in need. When you find someone else who is stuck with a narc help them to get out of that. I feel this is the way to take control from a narcissist. P.S: I hardly find people around me who know about emotional abuse. But I think everyone should read and know about it. In today’s mean world you will find a lot of people who try to influence you or demoralise you using the sweetest of words. Its about identifying these covert manipulators and distancing yourself from them. I have immense respect for people who have survived narcissistic partners. They happen to be the most strongheaded and emotionally stable people you can come across. I learn a lot of things from them. Truly the broken will always be the most beautiful. Moreover, People wonder why they end up hurt, seriously hurt, and even killed for their own actions. Cheating is a choice and there’s simply a lot of ignorance in the process.... Thank you so much for helping me out Metaspyhub@gmail. com. Your advice and services helped me so much. You are a lifesaver !!! The information you gave me about my cheating partner when you gave me access to his phone was everything I needed to get,.. thank you very much..
Read the Books - Surviving Aggressive People by Shawn T. Smith and In Sheep's Clothing: Understanding and Dealing with Manipulative People by Dr. George K. Simon Ph.D. These two books should be mandatory reading for all humans. Don't let the cover art of In Sheep's Clothing fool you. Its a powerful book. Unfortunately George let his wife design the cover- he later said in an interview that he regrets it.
An un-requested summary: 1) Let go of desire to control their perception, because that's equally as wrong as when they do it to you. 2) Practice changing the meaning of the lie - being thrown at you as if it were made of acid - into the truth that sets you free to be yourself, washing you clean. 3) Rewire your nervous system by bravely engaging in playful activities, because "play" is the biological opposite of trauma.
This is what I’ve been saying since I recognized not being able to figure out where “I” went. All the things I loved about me were no longer seen and I couldn’t figure out why.
I went through this for 27 years but to an even more twisted incest extent and I’m literally like trying not to spiral every morning I wake up safe barely at 27 years old. The sacrifice/greif/loss/guilt/pain it took to get here is an every day extra punch in the face. I’ve been trying to escape for years and finally it’s happened… yet there’s still worry left behind of generational trauma growing of the rest of my family idk idk n i didn’t picture an actual life out of that house and the abusers n so that’s also like wow all those years brainwashed n hurt n just a couple of months looking at trees, touching grass and crying but creating n learning n loving but being very much a potato some/many days
Great stuff. I’m so glad I found your channel. The five+ years of information happens to help me now. My favorite thing about your channel is going beyond the education of spotting a narcissist and moving toward healing the trauma stored in my body. Mindblowing moment for me discovering that. Thank you. Keep up the great work.
Speaking of controlling the narc, I was told at age 9 to "Control your dad!" and at the same time also told "Listen to your dad. You can't tell him what to do!" 🥴😵💫
I've been through multiple experiences of abuse since childhood and I'm now working to break my old patterns of behaviour. Boundaries, boundaries, boundaries. I feel more and more liberated as I'm shedding the layers of my old life and this channel is a great help.
My sister never called me in 6 years to see how I was, though I called her frequently. When I finally gave up and walked away, she tried to convince I was the bad guy. These people are shameless.
❤I hope everyone who has TH-cam recognizes how amazing and valuable it is! Thank you for your topic. If I had TH-cam back when I was a teenager??? This is exactly what I used to work hard on analyzing on my own (!) trying to find a way to grow up - in a scary situation ( my family home) . My father is an unapologetic narcissist personality disorder with alcoholic cruelty. My mother was behaving like him until she left him. My older sister was and still is, narcissistic personality disorder and a sadist. I can control the exposure to my sister- but growing up??? There were three of them and one of me- and everything hurt. I had zero encouragement. If I was “good” I was completely neglected. If I was not- I was punished. Really abused. Cps got called by our family counselor- and they took me away - I was abused sexually by cps. No where was safe . I lived in pain- and only emancipation by a single blessed judge - got me my freedom.
YES I did turn my personality inside out to make THEM happy. I did this for years untill I realized that it didnt work and I was tired of myself turning inside out. I stopped and then finally went no contact to have a chance to heal. Thats why I watch everything about narc and you put words to what happened to me growing up and how to change myself for ME and be the person I want to be THANKYOU I wathed this twice to gey it
What a good question. I think it would depend on so many factors. But everyone is damaged goods to some degree. I would have to think long and hard to come up with one person I consider emotionally healthy. Then I would wonder if they really are; so many of us mask, we even fool ourselves.
“Trying to employ healthy relationship tactics with someone who is unhealthy is only going to exasperate you.” 14:00 Yes. I tried that for years and even couples counselors were approaching our problems like a healthy couple. I did not know what covert narcissism was nor the attributes, and once I started learning, I realized that I have seen many of these problems for years and things always felt off, but I couldn’t figure out why there was no way to make her feel happy or appreciated and I allowed my own boundaries to be trampled. And gaslighting, self doubt, trying to keep the peace or be nice because I was “supposed to” do that in a relationship.
Thank you ❤ this is soo helpful! You are really inspiring 🥰 I long to be safe and to enjoy life again. Videos like yours are giving me hope 🙏 Ive noticed how genuinely kind survivors of this type of ab**e seem to be. Its sad people take our kindess for weakness 😞 and use it againt us.
I was so relieved when my mother died. My childhood was a horror story. I was told that I would never amount to anything and would always be a failure. She threatened to kill me and my Father. Christmas was a nightmare. I just realized that she was a narcissistic sociopath.
reality is intellectual property? the reality you all subject me to. yes. that fake reality you say is real. real nicve intellectual property prison for false confessions in my church. Im allowed to read everything youre doing and judge
![[Full Episode] The Restaurant War Thailand ศึกพ่อค้าซ่าแม่ค้าแซ่บ Episode 2 | 29 ก.ย. 67](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/r3lfLNH6Ke4/mqdefault.jpg)
I would love to hear your thoughts on going from enabling to imminity to narcissistic behaviors!!! And don't forget if my videos resonate with you - I have a membership where I meet LIVE weekly with survivors of emotional trauma from all over the world - we meet on zoom and we do the Cptsd Recovery work together to get US back!!! There is currently a 50% OFF SALE good through July 7, 2024. Here's the link for you to check it out and see if it's a good fit for you: www.micheleleenieves.com/offers/uJkkR2KT
I preferred the silent treatment to capitulating as a child. Couldn’t get far enough away.
Thank you Michell for going over this stuff. 😎
@@Apple_45 - do you have a car?
Make plans to get out, don’t tell anyone.
Don’t think just do- put one foot in front of the other. It will be hard but gets easier.
Seeing is the first step.
@@michaelgarrow3239 technically no, my dad who seems to fit the malignant narcissistic traits “bought” me a car but it’s really for him. I currently am getting my license tho, so I wouldn’t be able
to drive anywhere anyway. I would definitely have to suck up to him to get car privileges, there’s no doubt he would use it against me if I don’t accept his abuse.
Following you from Egypt lovely Michael ❤
The only way to take control from a narcissist is to get yourself from their domain first. You wont be able to figure out anything until and unless you are out of the hellish world. I will tell you one of my favourite stories. Once a King was too disturbed by everything that was happening around him. He felt as if no one was loyal to him and he was always afraid of his kingdom being attacked by perpetrators. He lost his sleep and his life had become hell. So he thought of taking a brief sojourn in the countryside. He passed through lush green fields and picturesque landscapes. The silent breeze that brushed through his hair filled his heart with joy. That is when he saw a farmer who was putting fence around his farmland. But his farmland had weeds all over and they hardly had any crops. This intrigued the King. He asked the farmer as to why was he putting a fence around the farm when the farm itself was covered with weeds. To this the farmer said that the farm was his own so he could get rid of the weeds whenever he liked. But he cant stop the stray dogs from running over his fields and destroying them. That is why he was putting the fence. To stop the stray dogs from venturing into the field. Once he was very assured about the security of his fields he can work on clearing the weeds and planting crops. On hearing this the King somewhat got the answer which he had been searching for. The human mind is also like the field. You cant control assholes from fiddling with your mind or saying bullshit. But you can definitely put a fence ( figuratively) so that these assholes cant influence you. And until and unless you dont put a fence you can never work on yourself. Once you have distanced yourself from toxic people then you can work on the healing process. Same is the case with narcs. Narcs are these stray dogs who suck your energy emotionally. They play mind games for fun because their mind wants melodrama. They hurt the very people who love them. So total isolation from these narcs is absolutely essential for the well being of your Mind. Once you are out of their mind games you can take decisions rationally. Narcs try to drain you emotionally. So everytime you respond to their low vibrations you tend to come to their level. But when you react confidently without panicking and without responding to their negative vibrations that is when you Win. When someone realises that you arent being influenced or being manipulated by their actions they will get tired of it. And after cutting them off completely from your lives you should work on your healing process. Work on clearing your mental clutter and keep yourself preoccupied. Read books and most importantly try to find your Purpose in life. When you find your Purpose you will be able to bear any pain in this World. Most importantly help others in need. When you find someone else who is stuck with a narc help them to get out of that. I feel this is the way to take control from a narcissist. P.S: I hardly find people around me who know about emotional abuse. But I think everyone should read and know about it. In today’s mean world you will find a lot of people who try to influence you or demoralise you using the sweetest of words. Its about identifying these covert manipulators and distancing yourself from them. I have immense respect for people who have survived narcissistic partners. They happen to be the most strongheaded and emotionally stable people you can come across. I learn a lot of things from them. Truly the broken will always be the most beautiful. Moreover, People wonder why they end up hurt, seriously hurt, and even killed for their own actions. Cheating is a choice and there’s simply a lot of ignorance in the process.... Thank you so much for helping me out Metaspyhub@gmail. com. Your advice and services helped me so much. You are a lifesaver !!! The information you gave me about my cheating partner when you gave me access to his phone was everything I needed to get,.. thank you very much..
Jeez
Read the Books - Surviving Aggressive People by Shawn T. Smith and In Sheep's Clothing: Understanding and Dealing with Manipulative People by Dr. George K. Simon Ph.D. These two books should be mandatory reading for all humans. Don't let the cover art of In Sheep's Clothing fool you. Its a powerful book. Unfortunately George let his wife design the cover- he later said in an interview that he regrets it.
An un-requested summary:
1) Let go of desire to control their perception, because that's equally as wrong as when they do it to you.
2) Practice changing the meaning of the lie - being thrown at you as if it were made of acid - into the truth that sets you free to be yourself, washing you clean.
3) Rewire your nervous system by bravely engaging in playful activities, because "play" is the biological opposite of trauma.
Thanks for all you do michelle .. you’re helping all of us… God Bless
This is what I’ve been saying since I recognized not being able to figure out where “I” went. All the things I loved about me were no longer seen and I couldn’t figure out why.
I went through this for 27 years but to an even more twisted incest extent and I’m literally like trying not to spiral every morning I wake up safe barely at 27 years old. The sacrifice/greif/loss/guilt/pain it took to get here is an every day extra punch in the face. I’ve been trying to escape for years and finally it’s happened… yet there’s still worry left behind of generational trauma growing of the rest of my family idk idk n i didn’t picture an actual life out of that house and the abusers n so that’s also like wow all those years brainwashed n hurt n just a couple of months looking at trees, touching grass and crying but creating n learning n loving but being very much a potato some/many days
Great stuff. I’m so glad I found your channel. The five+ years of information happens to help me now.
My favorite thing about your channel is going beyond the education of spotting a narcissist and moving toward healing the trauma stored in my body. Mindblowing moment for me discovering that.
Thank you. Keep up the great work.
Speaking of controlling the narc, I was told at age 9 to "Control your dad!" and at the same time also told "Listen to your dad. You can't tell him what to do!" 🥴😵💫
You get pushed and pulled in all directions! Complete mind fook 😵💫
I've been through multiple experiences of abuse since childhood and I'm now working to break my old patterns of behaviour. Boundaries, boundaries, boundaries. I feel more and more liberated as I'm shedding the layers of my old life and this channel is a great help.
My sister never called me in 6 years to see how I was, though I called her frequently. When I finally gave up and walked away, she tried to convince I was the bad guy. These people are shameless.
They cant see themselves at all. I'm convinced they are all psychotic and insane at some level.
❤I hope everyone who has TH-cam recognizes how amazing and valuable it is! Thank you for your topic. If I had TH-cam back when I was a teenager??? This is exactly what I used to work hard on analyzing on my own (!) trying to find a way to grow up - in a scary situation ( my family home) . My father is an unapologetic narcissist personality disorder with alcoholic cruelty. My mother was behaving like him until she left him. My older sister was and still is, narcissistic personality disorder and a sadist. I can control the exposure to my sister- but growing up??? There were three of them and one of me- and everything hurt. I had zero encouragement. If I was “good” I was completely neglected. If I was not- I was punished. Really abused. Cps got called by our family counselor- and they took me away - I was abused sexually by cps. No where was safe . I lived in pain- and only emancipation by a single blessed judge - got me my freedom.
I am in that process 🙏
Thank you for this video.
I used to wake up early in the morning 5: 00 am, both my mom and dad criticized me for that. I end up waking up late 7:00 am.
🔑🔑🔑
YES I did turn my personality inside out to make THEM happy. I did this for years untill I realized that it didnt work and I was tired of myself turning inside out. I stopped and then finally went no contact to have a chance to heal. Thats why I watch everything about narc and you put words to what happened to me growing up and how to change myself for ME and be the person I want to be THANKYOU I wathed this twice to gey it
Absolutely invaluable advice, and real support systems. Thankyou so much⚘
I’m currently experiencing complete discard. Silent treatment. Your insight is so powerful and timely. Very helpful. Thank you.
This is me. I'm not sure if it's carrying over from my childhood or happening to me now.
i have to get with reality as commanded by my 302 doctor. they dont know reality is my intellectual property. im splitting em like would
How do you rewire nervous system for joy and happines?
Following you from Egypt
🎉🎉🎉
Would it be healthy for survivors to date eachother? Almost like both are damged goods 😕
What a good question.
I think it would depend on so many factors.
But everyone is damaged goods to some degree. I would have to think long and hard to come up with one person I consider emotionally healthy. Then I would wonder if they really are; so many of us mask, we even fool ourselves.
🙏🫂🙏
“Trying to employ healthy relationship tactics with someone who is unhealthy is only going to exasperate you.” 14:00
Yes. I tried that for years and even couples counselors were approaching our problems like a healthy couple. I did not know what covert narcissism was nor the attributes, and once I started learning, I realized that I have seen many of these problems for years and things always felt off, but I couldn’t figure out why there was no way to make her feel happy or appreciated and I allowed my own boundaries to be trampled. And gaslighting, self doubt, trying to keep the peace or be nice because I was “supposed to” do that in a relationship.
Thank you ❤ this is soo helpful! You are really inspiring 🥰
I long to be safe and to enjoy life again. Videos like yours are giving me hope 🙏
Ive noticed how genuinely kind survivors of this type of ab**e seem to be. Its sad people take our kindess for weakness 😞 and use it againt us.
I was so relieved when my mother died. My childhood was a horror story. I was told that I would never amount to anything and would always be a failure. She threatened to kill me and my Father. Christmas was a nightmare. I just realized that she was a narcissistic sociopath.
Your still here my friend, so take comfort in knowing that some part of you realized your worth and survived.
I'm with you on that one. Been told I'm going nowhere, I'm going to hell, I'm not god (wtf??) just for being myself. Wishing you the best.
Your explanations have crystal clear clarity and cut like a diamond!! I love to listen to you talk.
reality is intellectual property? the reality you all subject me to. yes. that fake reality you say is real. real nicve intellectual property prison for false confessions in my church. Im allowed to read everything youre doing and judge
im from the USA where my primary care doctor has to be jordan peterson in canada. no way in hell
i had to become immune to satan. if that costed your life so be it
youre not gonna be a dictator are you? I already am