Yeah, but not really. Love at its core is about trust. Being possessive is a consequence of not trusting your partner, you become controlling to cope with your insecurity. In the end a relationship (not only a romantic one) that is deficient in trust simply won't last long, trust is everything.
1) Selfishness: Taking significantly more.than you are giving 2) Prideful Having to be always right 3) Depending on your partner to make you happy; co dependent lacking self sufficiency. 4) Expect people to read your mind; know what you need without communication 5) Commitment to relationship fears
kinda surprised that 4 of them aren't even close to me but at the same time, number 3 was my biggest mistake over, and over, and over again :/// feels super shitty to realize such thing after all the mistakes I've done all the fucking idiotic mistakes...
I'd like to add another one: - You're too selfless. Just like the selfish example, being too selfless is also damaging, because you're giving way more than receiving. In a relationship there needs to be balance between how much you give and how much you receive.
Totally agree w this suggestion. My opinion is that the people pleaser will probably have a very high tolerance at receiving abusive behavior and a very low capacity for recognizing abusive behavior. They, I suspect are probably the high empath type too, so they will be much more attractive to people that feed from the attention (overtly needy types) and vice versa. therefore pleasers and the needy are probably more likely to be trapped or hooked in that cycle (like the anxious-avoidant cycle). It would be very interesting to see how these two cycles compare. That would be one hell of a video for this channel.
I cannot stress this enough, LOVE YOURSELF BEFORE GETTING INTO A RELATIONSHIP. People who don’t love themselves cannot stay in relationships for long and there is no balance. Please try and love every part of yourself and don’t think you are undeserving of love, grow and learn to appreciate yourself too.
I dated a girl who didn't love herself for 3 years. We broke up because she wanted polygamy. I know this is an isolated case, just wanted to mention it.
Whenever I get into relationships I feel depressed. I don’t like the idea of falling for someone so hard that they have that much control over my emotions. I just don’t like the vulnerability feeling I get from being in love. I’ve honestly been happiest in my life when I’ve been single.
Honestly same. I started getting close to someone romantically and little broke down crying everyday before work because I felt as though I was becoming trapped again. Idk it’s hard to explain
That's the worst! I've liked someone for a long time and I'm pretty sure they like me back, but if they would ask me to be together I would probably reject...
1. You put yourself before anyone else. Being selfish. 2. You're prideful and you think you're always right 3. You always depend on your partner to make you happy. Being co-dependent. 4. You expect people to understand you without communicating with them. 5. You have commitment issues.
Part of that relationship phobia can be from watching your parents be stuck in a bad relationship for too long, which leads to the fear of being stuck with someone not right for you rather then them leaving. Especially when this is coupled with the horror stories you hear about some people in there relationships.
My parents have a very stormy relationship where they fight a lot and had some extreme rough patches especially during my teen years. I believe they love each other, but it really shaped my feelings and views on relationships. For a while it even convinced me that people in relationships always would end up resenting and hating each other. Now that I am in my first relationship I feel quite anxious about it being somehow wrong or toxic and I feel like that definitely has something to do with it, so your words resonate with me a lot.
Truer words were never spoken. My relationship phobia stems from these experiences where there has always been bad energy in the house for decades and no commitment on my part to leave this home due to sick parents I felt responsible for.
My Dads relationship with his wife may be the closest thing I've seen when it come to a happy married relationship. All i know is disfunction so maybe that type of lifestyle isnt in the cards for me. All of my previous romantic relationships have been dumpster fires 😂
Absolutely, that's a great point! Seeing unhealthy relationships, especially growing up, can create fears about being stuck in the wrong relationship. It's important to understand these fears and work through them, so you can build a healthy, trusting relationship when you're ready. Take your time and remember that your feelings are valid!
1. you put yourself first before anyone else 2. you’re prideful and you think you’re always right 3. you always depend on your partner to make you happy 4. you expect people to read your mind 5. you have commitment issues
1- selfishness 2- too much pride for good communication 3- toxic co-dependency 4- not expressing your feelings and problems enough 5- commitment issues
Relationship with yourself is better than a toxic relationship with someone else. When no one else is around, you are not alone, you always have your self.
Calling a relationship toxic is just shifting your responsibility. A relationship is just an mirror for your own bad behaviour, the toxicity comes from within, a relationship can "detoxify" if both sides are willing to work (unless it's abusive).
@@vrieskip This! The thing is people don't know how to communicate..... Just imagine going through all that education and still having issues forming basic sentences like........
Rudy This is very true and an underrated statement. Better to be with just yourself than to be in a relationship that is toxic, dysfunctional, or just plain mediocre.
That last one kinda hits home with me. I was in a relationship for about a year and a half which was ended by my partner abruptly. First I was told “ I’m not ready for a relationship” then after me prying some more she said “You were too scared to do anything.” The thing is, every time I tried to make some advances she’d show signs of discomfort so I would back off. Now every time I try to get into a relationship or express myself to someone I get anxious. It’s worse if I like them.
I have gone trough this just like you, i told him i loved him and he said "yes and no". Somehow we ended up together just to end things 7 months later. Lesson: don't force things. In your case, if she was uncertain about your relationship, you should not have got yourself involved. It's hard when you are in love, but is for the best. Try to find someone who you love and they love you 100%. With no uncertainty. If you found someone like this, please love them fully and accept that the outcome is not always the best, even if you are both in love, but you can really have good memories with someone.
lool what's even more is I was thinking about this over an hour ago, who knows maybe I even said it out loud, so I'm not sure but the question is, did they hear my thoughts or did they put the thought there? Lool yup, I'm definitely NOT ready for a relationship.
@@suryareddy72 of course you’re right. You should think of yourself first and yes sometimes you need to be a little selfish and that’s ok. You cannot love someone if you don’t love yourself right? But anyway how can I help you?
I recently got into a relationship with my best friend. When he told me he loved me and wanted to have a relationship, I couldn't say no 'cause I like him. I knew I wouldn't be able to commit to a relationship; I have commitment issues from a past relationship, my mental health is kinda bad and I have family problems. I told him about my issues and he assured me he would stay with me to overcome all my problems. Now 3 weeks into the relationship, I already feel better, my mental health is getting better, he is staying with me to face all my downs. I hope I can get through all my problems and have a healthy and relationship with him.😊
1. You put yourself before everyone else 2. You think you are always right 3. You always depend on your partner to make you happy 4. You expect people to read your mind. Bad at communicating 5. You have commitment phobia/relationship anxiety
Hey don't be such a downer about it love is beautiful and crazy and it's the best thing you can ever feel but it can hurt so much as well but i'd rather have those feelings than not experience them at all, they just make life so much more colourful.
*DON'T enter a relationship if some of these are you* - You become clingy when someone gives you attention - You end up going into relationships with a mindset to TAKE - You cannot allow a space between you and a partner, suffocating and making it about you - You feel empty without a person in your life
i have the first and last sign mentioned by you, ossein and a similarity with the one from wisdom fruit, but... without an actual relationship with genuine feelings and possibly without being with the person(s) i love (i'm pansexual and polysexual) i can't really feel fulfilled or happy, and no matter who i talk with talking doesn't help at all, sometimes i even end up not caring at all about being happy anymore. what should i do?
@@chronred8190 Happiness is a HIGH emotion and after all HIGHs, there are always LOWs. You should strive for attaining joy and peace of mind. It seems like you have boxed in yourself in all these labels. Joy and peace of mind is an inside job and you have to work within. No one can make you whole, beside your own self.
I can relate my dating struggles from this video in terms of dealing with co-dependency. I’ve also been involved with someone who was selfish and possessive but labeled it “love”… I’ve experienced someone who had severe abandonment and dependency issues that very much impacted our relationship.
TH-cam suggests videos according to your activity on the internet. You probably searched for relationship related content somehow. Maybe gifts, maybe advices, maybe stories, idk. The more you watch, the more suggestions for them you get.
One struggle I have is feeling confident in being able to be vulnerable. After some really bad past relationships, I have a strong desire to have confidence in a partner accepting me being vulnerable. I could be wrong, and it may be over analysis, but without the unwavering feeling that my vulnerabilities won't be weaponized, I keep some strong barriers up. Strangely, I feel that I'm not asking too much, but also worry that the barrier is too high. I think it's the establishment of genuine compassion that would take down said barrier, but that has continued to be an issue in relationships. I don't believe it's due to a lack of communication because I have been forward with the issue. It may be part of a higher standard I hold someone to, and it has been met before,
Absolutely, it's hard to find someone to build that level of trust with but it's better than setting for someone that can't understand it and use it against you.
Somehow i thought i was pretty messed up for thinking such a way. Feeling like it shouldn't be normal to not be ready, especially after years with the same person. However, when i pulled myself back, to find myself on my own (still in a relationship, its more a just getting away from everything to reset myself & truly find myself), i realized that it wasn't an issue, to think such a way. That not being ready is perfectly normal.
Yes, i feel youre not ready if your relationship with yourself isn't very loving. You can only truly love another to the degree you can love yourself in good times and bad, sickness and health, rich and poor, success and failure...how well do you love yourself in these situations?
Now that I’m older I totally understand the whole, “you can’t love someone until you love yourself” thing. I remember agreeing with arguments saying you still deserve to be loved even when you’re not 100% there, which is true! But! If you don’t work on yourself and the things that actually create barriers in your relationships, then you’ll always find yourself struggling and in heartache. When I wasn’t learning to be content with myself I found myself in a lot of issues like codependency. I realize know that not focusing on myself first was only putting me up to get hurt and hurt others. It was also asking a lot from my partner whose job wasn’t to make me happy, but to be happy WITH me. That was a huge one. Putting yourself in charge of your own happiness actually makes your relationships stronger because you balance things out. I’m still hesitant about getting into a relationship because I don’t want to set myself up for heartbreak, but at least I know that when I do decide to date again, I’ll be better equipped and in a better mindset for the both of us.
Mikee 1234444 the reality is. YOU WILL disappoint your partner at some point. It’s human nature!!! Whether you mean it or not. The true test is will you be able to work through it?
@@detectivehawk4976 No I mean I dont think I'll be what they expect. My first lover left me because I apparently didn't do the normal things a boyfriend is supposed to do.
Mikee 1234444 Don’t. People must respect you for who you are, especially your significant other. If you don’t meet their expectations, it’s no use being together in the first place. You do not to force yourself to meet their expectations especially when they’ll never be truly satisfied. The only person you need to change for is yourself. Don’t waste your time with the person that doesn’t suit you even if you love them. People don’t usually expect much from a relationship anyway. I don’t understand what did your ex expect from you:
Mikee 1234444 WHa really?? That’s completely okay! You were never obligated to. They may’ve just been too sexual to be in a relationship with you. They didn’t respect your boundaries and comforts, and you deserve somebody who does. You should never have to change yourself, unless it’s actually necessary. In this case, it isn’t. ubu
I grew up in a family that has anger issues and were everyone is self orientated. Trying to discuss anything is almost impossible because nobody takes responsibility and is very likely to either get overtly angry or passively aggressively angry. Since growing up I've given up trying to discuss anything about people's bad behaviour because they'll always lie and project to validate themselves. I always end up losing friends when I challenge them. I do so politely because I'm sick of the shouting and raging. The sad thing is I've never been able to have many friends and never had a relationship because most people are childish and want everything their way. I'm gay and find gay men are genrally a lot worse at having relationships that what straight men seem to. This isn't a 'me thing' but something that is reflected in the high percentage of gay men who cheat in relationships, the high amount of gay men that repeatedly have short relationships.
I can relate to this, same fam dynamics and find that even a casual observation of a partner’s actions or behaviour will often erupt into a screeching meltdown. From seemingly professional, rational mature men. I think I have given up!
@Marla Jacques Trust me,it's not just men. I recently broke up with a woman that was prone to crying fits and tantrums if I pointed out anything she did wrong. I'm very rational. Just talk to me and we can fix it. 9 years older than I and she was still a child. Sad. I loved her, but I will not be demonized for having boundaries. Better luck next time. 😊
im so sorry and i relate to you, even i dont win fights cuz i just dont want to cause a drama, it affects my mental health and makes me scared if i do smth implusive, also itll be okay, i hope u find someone gud for u!
Relationships are really one of the hardest things to maintain. Bringing two people together from different backgrounds and beliefs, it’s very hard but SO WORTH IT with the RIGHT PERSON
The blame game,what did you bring to the table,sounds selfish,you are troubled if you doubt yourself,aren't you the source of the conflict,your not a possession,confront all insecurities,do you need help with the chores,anxiety gets in your way,you feel vulnerable,so get help ✔️
@@Jackgritty28 What are you talking about? Your comment in response to my comment? Doesn’t really make sense to me. Maybe I’m missing the point? 🤔 🧐 🤷🏾♂️
I’m in a relationship and I must admit I have a few of these problems….but It would be stupid to decide to “break up” and toss away a good relationship when me and my partner are actually happy with each other and understand each other. Whenever he’s gone away I like to work on myself and improve my mindset so our relationship can build up. You can work on yourself while in a relationship
yes exactly, I'm going through the same thing and i struggle with codependency, but he knows that and he's ready to be patient about it while we work on it. love isn't easy, but it's worth it!
In a generation where ghosting and flings takes place, I'm actually not surprised to why relationships these days don't work. Some are just in a relationship for the sake of being with someone. edit: tysm 4 the likes y'all
This is so true. I made a promise with myself no matter how much I don’t want to be single😭😂 I would never ever date someone or be in any type of romantic relationship without some type of romantic like or love feelings towards them
Im in a relationship right now, but I'm doing my best to keep it alive and real, we always have conversations about what's wrong and right in the relationship. I'm just so happy I got a partner who is an old soul like me.
I’m reading through these comments and I see why relationships never last. It’s not because of the reasons stated in the video. It’s because nobody wants to help their partner through thick and thin. Expecting perfection up front without putting in the effort to deserve it in the first place. Nobody will ever be 100 percent ready for a relationship. Like Yin and Yang, you take the good in the bad and the bad in the good That’s life. Just my two cents
lol sir.. thats ur issue and why many relationships that should end DONT END cause of that delusionl sense of "loyaltiy" and "honor" to a person who now in a behavior pattern that ruins shit.. aka should i remain with u if say u start engaging in dumb shit that effects both of us.. why should I HAVE TO BE PUNISHED and BARE UR BURDENS.. people want u to stay so they that thrust and off load shit they cause on to others then get mad when that person has a line like "UH NO THANKS" so its a two way street.. u gont get to impose a "logic" and igorne it on the other side of this.. 😂 mistakes are fine and really not at all a reason to walk out.. BUTT BEHAVIOR PATTERNS are a different story.. fyi nobody DESERVES ANYTHING FROM ANYONE... nobody is obligated to anybody unless they AGREE in a mutual agreement... if ur my partner and u make a oof/mistake here and there .. thats fine.. butt if it becomes a behavior pattern... UR BREAKING THE AGREEMENT... im no longer obligated to hold up my end sir.. if anything in this case.. U SHOULD BE GRATEFUL TO ME THAT IM STILL STICKING AROUND.. also lets go back to deserve "without putting in the effort to deserve it in the first place" lets use a slightly off topic example for this.. does an overweight person "deserve" a fit healthy fine looking person? are u saying because they didnt put effort into themselves to also be fit healthy and well groomed that they dont deserve said supreme waifu/husbando..? u get what u get.. there is no DESERVE... then u work/putt in effort to maintain it.. or u dont.. and both cause can result in bood and bad.. simple.. im responding to u literally cause u said this "I’m reading through these comments and I see why relationships never last." u have zero clue why peoples relationships did or didnt last.. again u statement kinda implies there are RULES that if u follow it it will last.. ignoring reality of LIFE and SHIT HAPPENS and PEOPLE CHANGE and that if u break these "rules" ur relationship wont last.. which ignores all the time the still do despite bs... the simpliest answer... if one or both make it work.. it will last... period.. there are no rules no dos and donts.. cause all kinds of relationships exist.. my advise alway is.. I DONT KNOW UR LIFE OR THE PERSON UR WITH SO MY ADVISE WHICH WORKS FOR ME MIGHT BE BAD FOR U.. so YOU and you alone need to figure it out.. there are no rules.. yin and yang is goofy too... some people have like no ying in their lives really while some have almost no yang.. and it still works.. some people will not accept BS and they do fine.. usually no bs people weed thru the bs people and end up with other no bs people.. 😂 i will not follow u from a house out into a card board box if ur life goes to shit... why should i be punished WITH YOU for ur actions..? loyality is a double edge sword.. its used also to TRAP PEOPLE.. to force them to remain beholden to people fking up over and over... personally for ME.. that sense of I/THEY dont DESERVE anything nor THEM/ME feeling ENTILTED to things(persons) not making a big fuss over MISTAKES yet give nor groud to bad behavior patterns.. usually results in being able to BE REASONABLE and not deluded by "feelings" and thus able to MOVE ON from people that are making life more of a hassle and stressfull.. the fast u move on from people like that the sooner u can get back out and find more people.. life is too short.. and perception of time goes by faster and faster as we age.. 😂 i got a simple rule.. its not about being right or wrong.. its about understanding and no manipulation.. if people in general get the impression u being understanding of them regardless of who's right or wrong... people are not only more recpetive butt also more understanding of you.. and then both are more like to work together and actknowledge their own wrongs and work to correct them.. aka trust issues and lack of communication aka understanding.. they'll "communicate" alright by yelling fighting and trying to point out each others flaws and use it agaisnt each other.. xD all my relationships ended on MUTUAL TERMS... i really hate ur ying and yang methaphor cause reality isnt black and white.. there is no "good vs evil" we are a specturm.. 😂
yet, sometimes you have to give up. if you are the one responsible for someone elses happiness, taking care of them when they cant even do that thwmselves, its not right to stay, because it affects you. i had to stay up hours a day until 2/3AM to keep my ex boyfriend alive almost every day, he forced me out of my comfort zone, ignored my issues and boundaries, made everything about himself, cheated on me and pressured me to do things. i broke up with him a week ago, and i feel great.
I used to be like this but over the last year and a half I've been leaning about myself. Learning who I really am, learning what trauma I had in my childhood and how to overcome it and how to be in relationships and I don't have these problems anymore.
@@bellamoon12 I ain't subscribed and the videos popped up XD They are pretty usefull tho due to finally be able to share thought about subjects that aren't easy to talk about with real life people / friends
*Practice self-awareness of your emotions to be able to handle a relationship.* “What am I feeling right now? Why is that? What can I do to feel better?”
Did that, it evolved into "Are these feelings necessary in life? Is life meaningless without the existence of love? If so, isn't it life is meaningless by default if a person take everything logically?" Aaaand I end up studying bunch of philosophies, now a nihilist.
I'm watching this because this guy just asked me to be his gf but he's extremely selfish, always dismisses my feelings, is super passive aggressive and has even gaslighted me. I know he likes me but i definitely deserve better. Edit: my decisive moment to break up was sexual coercion from his part. Sexually assaulted me in the process, trying to see if he could change my mind. I didn't let him. It's almost a month post breakup and the first constant 3 weeks in a while where I haven't cried. Don't blame yourself for not seeing the signs soon enough, but once you do, get out as fast as you can. Lots of love 💚
Tell him this very things and work em out. If things didn't work then you truly deserve better. Don't be hasty otherwise it is kinda selfish from your part as well
@@ht-cr3ms if I decided to break it off it's because i've been trying for 6 months to work it out. Why do you think I said he dismisses my feelings? My problem was that I tried too hard to make it work and I didn't leave soon enough to realize it was harming me too much.
I saw someone mention selflessness in the comments and I 100% agree with that one. I was in a 2 year relationship with this one girl named Olivia. At the start we seemed to have a good balance with the giving and receiving in the relationship. Later on she seemed to start pulling away and I had talked to her about it but she denied all of my claims and accusations. The relationship ended up being one sided to where I was doing everything I could to hold up the relationship while she put little to no effort into it. I had sleepless nights, cried a lot, starting having panic attacks(very first time ever getting them), and I did everything in my power to keep her happy and safe. Around 3 months ago I confronted her again cause the entire week before she barely talked to me and I could clearly sense she was drifting away from me and losing interest. I asked her a few questions to see what could've been going wrong then I asked what I thought was a simple question and that was "why do you love me?" 3 days went by and I got no answer so I decided to break up with her and she had nothing to say but "Ok stop texting me, have a good life ig 💀" It broke me and ruined me mentally and emotionally, my grades in school went to shit for about a week and my parents were no help at all.
I'm sorry that happened to you, but you'll definitely get a better relationship with a person who likes you and wants to be in a relationship with you. I hope you're doing better!❤
@youngghoul1636 I am definitely doing much better, thank you, I've found a girl with so much more in common with me than the last girl and she's perfect, hopefully she can be the girl! ❤️
Being alone doesn't always mean you're lonely. Sometimes we have to find and learn to love ourselves as cliche as it might sound. Self respect and love go a long way in a relationship.
This character wasn't ready for a relationship because they forgot to bring clothes to the date, therapy, dinner, and sitting on the couch. Poor thing.
I used to date a girl I'm still really good friends with but she had a lot of issues with trust and getting attached, fearing that I'd run away from her. Fear of being rejected or missing out is natural for a human, but it's important to learn that you can trust and depend on other people to stay with you even when times get tough. Maybe you don't need a relationship right now and that's ok. You're not broken or weird because of that. You're learning. Everyone is constantly learning about themselves and about others. It's completely normal to not feel ready for romance. Take some time, gain that confidence in yourself, learn to love yourself even if others don't. And when you're ready, people will notice. Relationships are naturally hard. If you keep exploring, learning, and taking risks along the way, you'll find one that suits you.
You know, I've wondered a lot about staying friends with people you were once intimate with. For me, I don't understand how you can do it. I always used to think that I would be that kind of person, but the reality is different. I'm very slow to trust and open up, but once that barrier has been crossed, once those defenses are down, it's something I can't take back. I can't pretend it never happened. To go back from that, it would feel like I'm deliberately holding myself back and not talking about the elephant in the room. It would be disingenuous, because the things that led to me feeling drawn to someone in the first place wouldn't have changed. Despite all my other mixed feelings and whatever else transpired between us. It just doesn't seem healthy. But more power to you if you can make it work somehow.
@@Harkz0r you know, I read once that when two people remain friends after a break up they are either still in love or they never were... There are times when I remember that quote and I see it happen a lot.
You know it would be interesting to discover the extent of how low self esteem ruins your life after all many mental conditions such as depression or anxiety can be caused by low self esteem. I think, I am not an expert. Also keep up with your great and helpful videos
I would get nervous whenever people used to dm me and i felt like i had to try too hard to try to impress them since they would get bored of me. Point is i let my anxiety get the best of me and because of that, i lost contact w many friends and loved ones
Someone once told me "if u think relationship is not for u then don't do it, don't put someone else thru pain just cuz u can't handle a relationship". It make so much sense that I'm single for 3 years now. At this point I don't want someone to like me, I want me to like someone :(
I really like how you didn't just tell us the signs, you told us how we can become better and what we can do to counteract these things to make ourselves ready. Thank you a lot for this! :)
Relationship anxiety I would say is the most common, and the most unfortunate. Because you aren't harming the other person, but instead you're technically harming yourself by letting your insecurities bottle up inside instead of letting yourself love someone else and talk to them about your insecurities. From my experience men suffer a lot from relationship anxiety, but they don't like to show it/admit it. And there are a lot of sad reasons as to why that is.
@@caressemondine6415 Because of the stereotypes/standards that are mostly put on men (they can apply to women just not as often) that say men have to be "strong" but the masculine version of being "strong" means you don't express your emotions.
I hate to do it. Because it makes me cry and insanely scared but I am doing it because I love this person. I hate to cry but I do when I feel vulnerable.
it's fine if you can't handle a relationship, but keep the relationship still until someone speaks up about it IF POSSIBLE. my gf and i broke up almost a year ago because i felt as if i wasn't good enough, it was a selfish act, in all honesty, because i never tried to ask for her opinion in this situation and left her heart broken, we got back and are trying to improve our relationship
when you're single for the majority of your life, being in a relationship is a completely alien feeling. I tried a relationship once, didn't work out and now i don't feel any urge to have a lover anymore.
Dont need to force yourself to have a partner due to social norms if it doesn't suit you. Only do it because you find someone you truly love enough to change your habits (very hard to change habits the older we get though, unfortunately).
The care and compassion you can give to yourself is something that isn't wrong, and is a great gift to receive. If you have health problems, then you get them solved. If you need to feel good about yourself, do something that will bring out your stronger traits, or improve the ones that bother you, because you put the dent into that big chunk of things to do, and that's a start. Listen to Torches by Aimer, too.
I am making a good decision by not dating anyone until I figure out how to be less toxic toward the people I love. I believe I can be better, so I will work on it. I actually think this is another thing that shows you're not ready for a relationship. Before going into a relationship, you really have to self-evaluate (don't get this mistaken with self-criticize).
Saiki Kusuo damn same. I feel like I want to get to know my crush better but know that even if he likes me, I don’t think I’ll be ready. For me its hard to be vulnerable, idk why.
While hard at times , Accepting that no one will ever love you is freeing. And hatred of one-self is a good way of staying alive. After all if you feel pain you are still alive.
I realize that both my ex and I were not ready for a relationship. I was super co-dependent and he also needed to work on himself. It sucks that he was the one to break it off, but now i think he did the right thing for both of us. I wouldn't have been able to break it off. I hope he finds happiness in himself and I hope i find it too.
Hi I experienced the same thing now, how do you cope when he broke up with you? I still missed our good things together but sadly he doesn’t want me anymore
MY situation is exactly the same Lizeth. But only I was the one to break it off... I wish I could show her how much I love her. But I'm just not ready to handle that. So many responsibilities. But I'd love her back someday. 🥺
I'm in this situation right now, but we're still in a break phase. We're not making decisions yet. I wish we find a way to figure out, even if we have to be a part. I want the best for him and myself
im also co-dependent in our relationship w my ex. she had to break up w/ me because the relationship wasn't doing us any good anymore. I'm determined to work on my self, and try my luck again with her when I'm ready. I miss her so much.
Every time I have a crush on someone or even start dating someone I close my self and become cold and start to not want to be alone with them I don’t know why I do this and hate it, I want to stop doing this
I had this too until i was virgin. Maybe it was becasuse my parents are like that they kinda reject their child if he/she find gf/bf (me and my siblings)
Ahh, this was me when I had my first relationship. I was just too scared and not being confident and worried that things might go wrong. Just be confident in yourself
I read that there are people who fall for a person and if that person likes them back then they stop liking her/him Lemme check Found it aromantic.wikia.com/wiki/Lithromantic It may not be (It's pretty rare) this but give it a look
This channel is great. A sweet sounding voice tells you everything about you is wrong. And then there is no one to be angry at, then you can start trying to be better.
Personally I like being alone, even when I'm laughing and talking with a friend what is constantly running through my mind is that I can't wait for the silence to return
that’s exactly how i feel. social interaction is very exhausting for me and even if i’m best friends with someone i don’t want to talk and hangout everyday
You can have a partner that you don’t talk to and hangout with everyday, and it honestly makes your partner more attracted to you because it makes it seem like your busy and have a life that doesn’t involve to much, even if your not doing anything in reality. Girls love a busy guy
Same, although its like I want to go out with people but only for a short time and only one person at a time. I miss when I was in college and could just say I have homework to do. I'd rather just watch people interact, although most people find it creepy.
yep, my biggest problem is co dependency. Whenever i’m in a relationship/dating, i can’t get me self to be happy when they’re not around. I usually just wait until they’re able to text again or just being available again. I just can’t help but feel sad, lost, anxious and upset whenever they’re gone for the time being. It sucks, and I wanna learn how to fix this so badly. I do well on hiding this from my partner, but it sucks how I have to feel so depressed and keep it to myself.
Like the video said it has to do with the way your parents raised you whether you were neglected or abused the easiest way to fix it is to unroll the repressed subconscious traumatic feelings caused by it and learn the hurtful facts pertaining to what actually happened to you
Same but I'm working on it. Codependent people usually lost connections with their other relationships so try to bond with your friends when your partner is not around, it actually helps and I'm gradually healing. Being opened about the feelings are healthy too, try to tell it to your partner so that she's aware with your feelings and probably makes some ways to help you cope with it. Connection is the key. 🥰
i feel like my past few relationships have just been codependent and they make it seem like its my responsibility to consistently be there whenever they need. I NEED MY OWN TIME TYVM
Its all good grab a beer because the gangs all here th-cam.com/video/zeKE0NHUtUw/w-d-xo.html (a nice transitional intro) th-cam.com/video/7QfEX6ScOVg/w-d-xo.html (Next time just be thanos my dude)
Emma Haezebrouck I have rocd and I get triggered easily, ruminate, and more but now I know better and it gets better with time it’s easier to manage in the relationship. Relationship anxiety gets better
It's not exactly that I want people read my mind. As an introvert, I have difficulties in sharing my thoughts and let them know what is really happening. So I don't even try to an approach. I tend to avoid conflict a lot so I prefer let everything in the same way while trying to keep myself at a certain distance if cannot just abandon everything. I'm a little bit codependent too. Anyway, my life is just miserable.
@@PF-gi9vv not necessarily. It is possible to understand the problem(s) without understanding any solutions. I have this problem. I understand my problems, but I don't know what the solutions are.
reading this infuriates me because it reminds me of my old self... You can do it and work on yourself. I am an introvert but communication shouldn't be hard either. All those internal self reflections should help us articulate our thoughts better as we grow older. Unless you are intentionally avoiding such change because of fear. I am also shy + Introverted, which are deadly combos. However, with enough work on yourself, it is possible. It also becomes easier to communicate with your love one, similar to how you communicate with your family. It takes time for people, and it is different for everyone. However, if you really want to get out of your comfort zone to grow, take communicate class or go to social events. Even introverts can do that once awhile.
True dat. Ifu cant even afford u a house let alone a car. Then ur not going far in a relationship. Without money ur not living ur life so how can u except to live a life with someone else
Hammer Addiction4u I learned that if you blame yourself for such things like looks it’s never about that in a relationship but rather about self criticism and low self esteem which isn’t really healthy for a relationship either.
everyone's beautiful in someone's eyes. Kevin^ is right. the notion of beauty is more about yourself than someone else. love who you are. maybe make yourself better. but stop hating the things you can't change and realize that's what makes you who you are. jesus, didn't think i'd ever be speaking in cliches
Looks only matter to woman that aren't that bright or that use men. Most women are turned on by ideas like ' you trust me?' ' you understand what I'm saying?'.
Heather J'nel well caring about looks isn’t bad at all, but the way some people care is wrong. Many people (yes men too) do care about the way they look but unfortunately what many care about are things they can’t change like how their face may look or other unique things. We have to teach ourselves and others to simply love ourselves despite the facts we have flaws in the eyes of society. Caring about how you dress or how you do your make up aren’t things that somebody should be ashamed. In fact everyone should care about how they look because we do feel good if we look good.
Relationship anxiety is a thing... I found a good guy or lemme say he found me and I'm forever thinking negative thoughts Update. The guy I thought was good... Yes the one who found me, Ghosted me 😢. Maybe my anxiety pushed him away 🤷♀️. We move>>>
When you love all of life and everyone should too But why should I expect them to? Why should I be selfish and prioritize on oneself and they're desires because at the end of the day I know what they're after
@@wisdomfruit7162 thx for ur advice rlly sad and powerful I think my friend already realises i hate myself and I am sorry but it is really hard to like myself if I have nothing to say good about myself, Sorry but it true
1. 0:46 you put yourself first before anyone else. 2. 1:39 you’re prideful and you think you’re always right 3. 2:27 you always depend on your partner to make you happy 4. 3:21 you expect people to read your mind 5. 4:08 you have commitment issues
Well have some character and tell them whats up instead of handling it wrong with no courage and giving them a negativ experience. Thats all you gotta do if you not interested. We all responsibility and that one isnt hard.
So everyone should first fill themselves with love and then have a relationship where you can give them love and care fully without being scared or selfish . So selfcare first. Thank you for sharing 😇❤️❤️
@@christianthornton7688 its ok. There is nothing wrong with solitude. In fact its a beautiful feeling. Insted to understanding other, understand yourself and fill urself with joy and peace 😇
My biggest problem is that I'm selfish and I feel guilty about it all the time. I want to improve and in fact I try a lot to do favors to other people or help them even if it requires some of my time. I'm also a good listener and I try to put empathy and solidarity above every other value in life. Thing is: more often than not this behaviour exhausts me so mich if it prevents me from having my "alone" moments, where there's me and only me doing whatever I feel like doing and they have to be frequent enoigh or I start feeling extremely nervous and anxious. The feeling of inadequacy in the relationship... I feel it so much. This and the fear of commitment, even though this is my first relationship. This feelings are so strong and connected to my anxiety issues that they change the perception of my reality. They change my humour costantly to the point that I feel anxious around my boyfriend, sexual desire just leaves for who knows how long, my sentiment is on a trial again and again and again. It's a cycle of feeling in love with the person, than not in love, than feeling afraid, then in love again and so on. I've been going to therapy for almost 10 years and this relationship has been going on for almost 4 years. I needn't mention that my therapy sessions of these last 4 years have all been around this issue, basically. He's a wonderful person. I've been blessed to meet him and to be loved by him. No one would've stayed in these conditions. Hell, I probably don't even deserve him. I'm fighting hard to stay, to make him stay. I want to solve my problems while I'm still with him, cause we both see so much potential in our relationship...
I love wearing shiny silky polyester shirts tucked into a long pair of black dress slacks and some women absolutely love it.I stay slim and in shape and as of now there are 5 women between Raleigh and Greensboro that have it made it known that they are interested in me.I just get stuck in wanting to ask them out.It is messed up.I love dressing up and getting the attention but don't go all out with the communicating part.😏
Nah, I don't think so. I know this is a joke, haha, but I just watched this video out of curiosity, and to, uh... See how many of these related to my ex jfdk;aslfjdsak; XD
@@willowthewisp2725 I was totally broken when the love of my life left me it was so hard for me &I almost gave up if not a friend who directed me to a very good and powerful man called DR ola who helped me bring back the love of my life and now she treat me with so much love ❣️ and care. I don't know what your problem are passing through but with he did for me I know he can help you .so try and talk to him on WhatsApp:+2349069313955 RO Email him on DrOlaogaga@gmail.com
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Is youtube tryna tell me something
i feel you
Yes, its telling u how to get along in a relationship :')))
Yes, it's telling you to not be in a relationship.
It must be if u asked😂
Honestly all these relationship things in my feed
“Love is about appreciation, not possession.”
BIG words.
appreciating, not depending.
I don't choose to get obsessed it just happens
don't agree but okay.
@@sahansensu6108 So possessing a partner is more important than appreciating them?
Yeah, but not really. Love at its core is about trust. Being possessive is a consequence of not trusting your partner, you become controlling to cope with your insecurity.
In the end a relationship (not only a romantic one) that is deficient in trust simply won't last long, trust is everything.
Fun fact: You proably did not search this
Edit: yea I saw this comment somewhere else and used it
Fun fact: You're right.
TH-cam recommendations are tossic
@@recon2kyt587 tossic toxic
Jai den I actually did because it was in my recommendations and I lost it😳
Actually, I did 😎
1) Selfishness: Taking significantly more.than you are giving
2) Prideful Having to be always right
3) Depending on your partner to make you happy; co dependent lacking self sufficiency.
4) Expect people to read your mind; know what you need without communication
5) Commitment to relationship fears
6) You are alone and just watch a 5 min video on how you are not prepare for a relationship that doesnt exist (def me fr)
@@darkpierce9561exactly! and this makes me insecure 😂
kinda surprised that 4 of them aren't even close to me
but at the same time, number 3 was my biggest mistake over, and over, and over again :///
feels super shitty to realize such thing after all the mistakes I've done
all the fucking idiotic mistakes...
So my ex?
yes we watched the same video you didnt need to repeat everything she said
Fact: this channel's comment sections are the most real place in this internet.
Or to flip it, where you'll find comments reinforcing selves built on imagination, keeping it very much unreal.
Depends how you look at it.
Cant agree more.
well i guess yeah
accurate af
6. You can’t find anyone to have a relationship with.
You ain't lying 👍.
Yea I feel you
Jethyboi That’s my problem
Jethyboi I hate that I can only like this once cuz a relate on a spiritual level
HAHAHHAHAHAHHA MY RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM!!!!
I'd like to add another one:
- You're too selfless. Just like the selfish example, being too selfless is also damaging, because you're giving way more than receiving. In a relationship there needs to be balance between how much you give and how much you receive.
agree with this one for sure. Especially when you over exert yourself trying to take care of others.
Amen 🙏 sister that's how I feel I need to get my emotional and spiritual balance
i did that and it hurt me in the end. my fault i guess
Totally agree w this suggestion. My opinion is that the people pleaser will probably have a very high tolerance at receiving abusive behavior and a very low capacity for recognizing abusive behavior. They, I suspect are probably the high empath type too, so they will be much more attractive to people that feed from the attention (overtly needy types) and vice versa. therefore pleasers and the needy are probably more likely to be trapped or hooked in that cycle (like the anxious-avoidant cycle). It would be very interesting to see how these two cycles compare. That would be one hell of a video for this channel.
@@DrgnTmrSirGawain that’s really really interesting to read, almost exactly like my last relationship ahaha.
I cannot stress this enough, LOVE YOURSELF BEFORE GETTING INTO A RELATIONSHIP. People who don’t love themselves cannot stay in relationships for long and there is no balance. Please try and love every part of yourself and don’t think you are undeserving of love, grow and learn to appreciate yourself too.
I dated a girl who didn't love herself for 3 years. We broke up because she wanted polygamy.
I know this is an isolated case, just wanted to mention it.
@@marlonarancibia3247 She was just a hoe. Off to the next one
@@marlonarancibia3247 your experience will always be valid 👍👍👍🫂🫂🫂 im sorry yall broke up
As one wise lyricist wrote:
"You rely on someone else
To make you feel alright,
As far as I'm concerned
It's no kind of life"
@@Slamazzar real
Whenever I get into relationships I feel depressed. I don’t like the idea of falling for someone so hard that they have that much control over my emotions. I just don’t like the vulnerability feeling I get from being in love. I’ve honestly been happiest in my life when I’ve been single.
Same here!
Taylor Tot OMFL i feel the same
Same I think you might be an aroace
Damn same
Honestly same. I started getting close to someone romantically and little broke down crying everyday before work because I felt as though I was becoming trapped again. Idk it’s hard to explain
Sucks when you like someone you could be with, but deep down you know you can’t handle a relationship right now.
Edit: Thanks for all the likes! 🥹
venus 444 and then they start to date someone...
That's the worst! I've liked someone for a long time and I'm pretty sure they like me back, but if they would ask me to be together I would probably reject...
It sux, but the fact you realize this, makes you an awesome partner when you are ready! 🙃
Yup
That’s the situation where I’m in
1. You put yourself before anyone else. Being selfish.
2. You're prideful and you think you're always right
3. You always depend on your partner to make you happy. Being co-dependent.
4. You expect people to understand you without communicating with them.
5. You have commitment issues.
Thank you
I got a perfect score!
FUCK I think I check all
Yup, I've got problems with 3 and 4.
1. ✔️
2. ✔️
3. ✔️
4. ✔️
5. ✔️
Part of that relationship phobia can be from watching your parents be stuck in a bad relationship for too long, which leads to the fear of being stuck with someone not right for you rather then them leaving. Especially when this is coupled with the horror stories you hear about some people in there relationships.
this strikes so true
My parents have a very stormy relationship where they fight a lot and had some extreme rough patches especially during my teen years. I believe they love each other, but it really shaped my feelings and views on relationships. For a while it even convinced me that people in relationships always would end up resenting and hating each other. Now that I am in my first relationship I feel quite anxious about it being somehow wrong or toxic and I feel like that definitely has something to do with it, so your words resonate with me a lot.
Truer words were never spoken. My relationship phobia stems from these experiences where there has always been bad energy in the house for decades and no commitment on my part to leave this home due to sick parents I felt responsible for.
My Dads relationship with his wife may be the closest thing I've seen when it come to a happy married relationship. All i know is disfunction so maybe that type of lifestyle isnt in the cards for me. All of my previous romantic relationships have been dumpster fires 😂
Absolutely, that's a great point! Seeing unhealthy relationships, especially growing up, can create fears about being stuck in the wrong relationship. It's important to understand these fears and work through them, so you can build a healthy, trusting relationship when you're ready. Take your time and remember that your feelings are valid!
1. you put yourself first before anyone else
2. you’re prideful and you think you’re always right
3. you always depend on your partner to make you happy
4. you expect people to read your mind
5. you have commitment issues
samantha• thank you. I love the channel. But sometimes I just want to read the list.
samantha• lol. Thanks!!! I have been ready for one. I am just not being nice to evil people.
Well im fucked
Oh no the name of my ex :( TrIgGerEd
I just went through this with someone..
1- selfishness
2- too much pride for good communication
3- toxic co-dependency
4- not expressing your feelings and problems enough
5- commitment issues
Tysm I wanted the summary mega badly!
So my roommates in a nut shell
Taylor Brown dang I’m never gonna be ready
Number 4.. number 4 is what I struggle with.
@@ДмитртийГрускаев number 4 is bullshit. Express yourself however you want.
Relationship with yourself is better than a toxic relationship with someone else. When no one else is around, you are not alone, you always have your self.
Calling a relationship toxic is just shifting your responsibility. A relationship is just an mirror for your own bad behaviour, the toxicity comes from within, a relationship can "detoxify" if both sides are willing to work (unless it's abusive).
@@vrieskip This! The thing is people don't know how to communicate..... Just imagine going through all that education and still having issues forming basic sentences like........
Thanks. I really needed this at this point in my life
Rudy This is very true and an underrated statement. Better to be with just yourself than to be in a relationship that is toxic, dysfunctional, or just plain mediocre.
What if you're the toxic one?
That last one kinda hits home with me. I was in a relationship for about a year and a half which was ended by my partner abruptly. First I was told “ I’m not ready for a relationship” then after me prying some more she said “You were too scared to do anything.” The thing is, every time I tried to make some advances she’d show signs of discomfort so I would back off. Now every time I try to get into a relationship or express myself to someone I get anxious. It’s worse if I like them.
I have gone trough this just like you, i told him i loved him and he said "yes and no". Somehow we ended up together just to end things 7 months later. Lesson: don't force things.
In your case, if she was uncertain about your relationship, you should not have got yourself involved. It's hard when you are in love, but is for the best.
Try to find someone who you love and they love you 100%. With no uncertainty. If you found someone like this, please love them fully and accept that the outcome is not always the best, even if you are both in love, but you can really have good memories with someone.
Same😓
What could you do differently now that you're aware of the reason?
My cia agent wildin recommending me this
😂
Saw that text you sent...doesn't want you to get hurt...
Bruh 😂
Arly Quinn ayyy 😂😂😂😂👌
lool what's even more is I was thinking about this over an hour ago, who knows maybe I even said it out loud, so I'm not sure but the question is, did they hear my thoughts or did they put the thought there? Lool yup, I'm definitely NOT ready for a relationship.
Not only can't I hold a relationship, I can't even start one.
Same
Sucks don’t it?
Dude, sucks being ugly
Same 25 years , no dates , tf is wrong with me
@@zsurvivalist7996 nothing wrong with you. You're smart that's all.
Trying to be there for someone who just isn't ready to handle a relationship is so damn painful.
So sorry .. I’m the one who has caused the hurt in my situation and it hurts me 😔
Sometimes you need to let them go in order for them to find themselves, even if it hurts
Hey Andrew can you talk to me about your situation. I’m going through the same.
this part.
@@suryareddy72 of course you’re right. You should think of yourself first and yes sometimes you need to be a little selfish and that’s ok. You cannot love someone if you don’t love yourself right? But anyway how can I help you?
I recently got into a relationship with my best friend. When he told me he loved me and wanted to have a relationship, I couldn't say no 'cause I like him. I knew I wouldn't be able to commit to a relationship; I have commitment issues from a past relationship, my mental health is kinda bad and I have family problems. I told him about my issues and he assured me he would stay with me to overcome all my problems. Now 3 weeks into the relationship, I already feel better, my mental health is getting better, he is staying with me to face all my downs. I hope I can get through all my problems and have a healthy and relationship with him.😊
Girl you are too cute tbh😩
Update??
Update
I'm happy it worked out for you
1. You put yourself before everyone else
2. You think you are always right
3. You always depend on your partner to make you happy
4. You expect people to read your mind. Bad at communicating
5. You have commitment phobia/relationship anxiety
Me
thank you
I have 2 and 3 that's why it not last long to my last relationship 😢😥
Because that’s an Lie because of that to respect someone’s father is doing bad things and I don’t want that
I only relate to the last 3. :(
I never realized how much love really can affect you. It kind of sucks..
Idk lol this video just seems to be overanalyzing everything
Hey don't be such a downer about it love is beautiful and crazy and it's the best thing you can ever feel but it can hurt so much as well but i'd rather have those feelings than not experience them at all, they just make life so much more colourful.
Did you just read my mind? 🤦🏽♂️
And that's why we love it tho, like life itself
@@princepersius3580 thank you 🥰
*DON'T enter a relationship if some of these are you*
- You become clingy when someone gives you attention
- You end up going into relationships with a mindset to TAKE
- You cannot allow a space between you and a partner, suffocating and making it about you
- You feel empty without a person in your life
-No one can connect with you often leaving you feeling hopeless not giving the next a chance
I can relate to that last one.
i have the first and last sign mentioned by you, ossein and a similarity with the one from wisdom fruit, but... without an actual relationship with genuine feelings and possibly without being with the person(s) i love (i'm pansexual and polysexual) i can't really feel fulfilled or happy, and no matter who i talk with talking doesn't help at all, sometimes i even end up not caring at all about being happy anymore. what should i do?
@@chronred8190 Happiness is a HIGH emotion and after all HIGHs, there are always LOWs.
You should strive for attaining joy and peace of mind.
It seems like you have boxed in yourself in all these labels. Joy and peace of mind is an inside job and you have to work within. No one can make you whole, beside your own self.
@@shad3revo111 I will repeat as for Chron
No one can make you whole, beside your own self. Love comes within.
I can relate my dating struggles from this video in terms of dealing with co-dependency. I’ve also been involved with someone who was selfish and possessive but labeled it “love”… I’ve experienced someone who had severe abandonment and dependency issues that very much impacted our relationship.
How has this changed you as a person?
Is it just me because right now I’m in a relationship and all these videos are coming out
Yo Yo yeah maybe
I feel ya
I just entered in a relationship 1 hr ago -_-
Me too and it doesn’t help that all the videos are stuff like “5 signs you were never in love” and “why you should break up with your partner”
TH-cam suggests videos according to your activity on the internet. You probably searched for relationship related content somehow. Maybe gifts, maybe advices, maybe stories, idk. The more you watch, the more suggestions for them you get.
His main problem is definitely that sprout growing on his head.
I Thot it was cute
My name is HAROLD
lmaoo bruhhhh why did you have to say that fr why 💀😭
Man's be looking like Greg heffley😂
Floating Sunfish lmao this fucking killed me!
Me: I WANT THE LOVE
Psych2Go: *YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE LOVE*
😂😂😂 this is so true
This is me rn😂
Lmao thanks to my fbi agent for recommending this 💖
*WHAT IS LOVE?*
The Moris *Baby don’t hurt me*
One struggle I have is feeling confident in being able to be vulnerable. After some really bad past relationships, I have a strong desire to have confidence in a partner accepting me being vulnerable. I could be wrong, and it may be over analysis, but without the unwavering feeling that my vulnerabilities won't be weaponized, I keep some strong barriers up. Strangely, I feel that I'm not asking too much, but also worry that the barrier is too high. I think it's the establishment of genuine compassion that would take down said barrier, but that has continued to be an issue in relationships. I don't believe it's due to a lack of communication because I have been forward with the issue. It may be part of a higher standard I hold someone to, and it has been met before,
Very interesting
I resonate with this
Absolutely, it's hard to find someone to build that level of trust with but it's better than setting for someone that can't understand it and use it against you.
It sucks when you’re in relationships already but you know you have to stop because you’re not ready
Somehow i thought i was pretty messed up for thinking such a way. Feeling like it shouldn't be normal to not be ready, especially after years with the same person. However, when i pulled myself back, to find myself on my own (still in a relationship, its more a just getting away from everything to reset myself & truly find myself), i realized that it wasn't an issue, to think such a way. That not being ready is perfectly normal.
I know that feeling
Yep :(
Yes, i feel youre not ready if your relationship with yourself isn't very loving. You can only truly love another to the degree you can love yourself in good times and bad, sickness and health, rich and poor, success and failure...how well do you love yourself in these situations?
:(
Now that I’m older I totally understand the whole, “you can’t love someone until you love yourself” thing. I remember agreeing with arguments saying you still deserve to be loved even when you’re not 100% there, which is true! But! If you don’t work on yourself and the things that actually create barriers in your relationships, then you’ll always find yourself struggling and in heartache. When I wasn’t learning to be content with myself I found myself in a lot of issues like codependency. I realize know that not focusing on myself first was only putting me up to get hurt and hurt others. It was also asking a lot from my partner whose job wasn’t to make me happy, but to be happy WITH me. That was a huge one. Putting yourself in charge of your own happiness actually makes your relationships stronger because you balance things out. I’m still hesitant about getting into a relationship because I don’t want to set myself up for heartbreak, but at least I know that when I do decide to date again, I’ll be better equipped and in a better mindset for the both of us.
Damm girl i love the way you think
💯
Thank you for your comment. You said the things, that were in my head but cannnot be said
That is something I'm beginning to learn now. Even though I think I was some what happy with myself still things o could improve on
I love this and I can totally relate to pretty much all of it. You're not alone
I have a fear that I’ll disappoint my partner.
Mikee 1234444 the reality is. YOU WILL disappoint your partner at some point. It’s human nature!!! Whether you mean it or not. The true test is will you be able to work through it?
@@detectivehawk4976 No I mean I dont think I'll be what they expect. My first lover left me because I apparently didn't do the normal things a boyfriend is supposed to do.
Mikee 1234444 Don’t. People must respect you for who you are, especially your significant other. If you don’t meet their expectations, it’s no use being together in the first place. You do not to force yourself to meet their expectations especially when they’ll never be truly satisfied. The only person you need to change for is yourself. Don’t waste your time with the person that doesn’t suit you even if you love them. People don’t usually expect much from a relationship anyway. I don’t understand what did your ex expect from you:
Thi thu huyen Nguyen according to them I didn’t grope their thigh and I refused sexual intercourse
Mikee 1234444 WHa really?? That’s completely okay! You were never obligated to. They may’ve just been too sexual to be in a relationship with you. They didn’t respect your boundaries and comforts, and you deserve somebody who does. You should never have to change yourself, unless it’s actually necessary. In this case, it isn’t. ubu
I grew up in a family that has anger issues and were everyone is self orientated.
Trying to discuss anything is almost impossible because nobody takes responsibility and is very likely to either get overtly angry or passively aggressively angry.
Since growing up I've given up trying to discuss anything about people's bad behaviour because they'll always lie and project to validate themselves. I always end up losing friends when I challenge them. I do so politely because I'm sick of the shouting and raging.
The sad thing is I've never been able to have many friends and never had a relationship because most people are childish and want everything their way.
I'm gay and find gay men are genrally a lot worse at having relationships that what straight men seem to. This isn't a 'me thing' but something that is reflected in the high percentage of gay men who cheat in relationships, the high amount of gay men that repeatedly have short relationships.
I can relate to this, same fam dynamics and find that even a casual observation of a partner’s actions or behaviour will often erupt into a screeching meltdown. From seemingly professional, rational mature men. I think I have given up!
@Marla Jacques Trust me,it's not just men. I recently broke up with a woman that was prone to crying fits and tantrums if I pointed out anything she did wrong. I'm very rational. Just talk to me and we can fix it. 9 years older than I and she was still a child. Sad. I loved her, but I will not be demonized for having boundaries. Better luck next time. 😊
@@banksthemicrobully8478 thank you, and same to you 🙏🏼
im so sorry and i relate to you, even i dont win fights cuz i just dont want to cause a drama, it affects my mental health and makes me scared if i do smth implusive, also itll be okay, i hope u find someone gud for u!
My family is exactly like this. Every time I try to explain a point of view nicely, they turn the tables against me in a very out of context way
Relationships are really one of the hardest things to maintain. Bringing two people together from different backgrounds and beliefs, it’s very hard but SO WORTH IT with the RIGHT PERSON
Exactly I committed my life to maths and economics and I feel studies are easier than relationship.
The blame game,what did you bring to the table,sounds selfish,you are troubled if you doubt yourself,aren't you the source of the conflict,your not a possession,confront all insecurities,do you need help with the chores,anxiety gets in your way,you feel vulnerable,so get help ✔️
@@Jackgritty28 What are you talking about? Your comment in response to my comment? Doesn’t really make sense to me. Maybe I’m missing the point? 🤔 🧐 🤷🏾♂️
@@cantaloupemfpeterson817 I'm not responding to your comment,fool
@@cantaloupemfpeterson817 The video is about relationships,not about MF Peterson 🏳️🌈💲💥❌
I’m in a relationship and I must admit I have a few of these problems….but It would be stupid to decide to “break up” and toss away a good relationship when me and my partner are actually happy with each other and understand each other.
Whenever he’s gone away I like to work on myself and improve my mindset so our relationship can build up. You can work on yourself while in a relationship
‼️‼️
I agree and it’s actually helped me become a better person
yes exactly, I'm going through the same thing and i struggle with codependency, but he knows that and he's ready to be patient about it while we work on it. love isn't easy, but it's worth it!
love this
If you can find one.
Psych2Go: "Visit a therapist for your problems : ) "
My wallet: "Man up, pussyboy."
I laughed too much at this!
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Same. -_-
Best! 😘
I love how this video is in my recommended when we just ended our relationship because she pretty much wasn’t ready 💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀
Would you continue the relationship when she IS ready?
@@Psych2goI know I will, and will support her until she's ready.
"LOVE IS ABOUT APPRECIATION NOT POSSESSION" lemme hear ya again!
It just played when I read this
Clapping between words is the unironic version of retarded spongebob
@@JerrysFineCigars lmao
Louder for the Wattpad cliche bad boy/good girl couples at the rear back
🗣🗣🗣
In a generation where ghosting and flings takes place, I'm actually not surprised to why relationships these days don't work. Some are just in a relationship for the sake of being with someone.
edit: tysm 4 the likes y'all
People has become more and more divided these days
"Some are just in a relationship for the sake of being with someone," this is so true
This is so true. I made a promise with myself no matter how much I don’t want to be single😭😂 I would never ever date someone or be in any type of romantic relationship without some type of romantic like or love feelings towards them
Ghosting and flings are not new.
Im in a relationship right now, but I'm doing my best to keep it alive and real, we always have conversations about what's wrong and right in the relationship. I'm just so happy I got a partner who is an old soul like me.
I’m reading through these comments and I see why relationships never last. It’s not because of the reasons stated in the video. It’s because nobody wants to help their partner through thick and thin. Expecting perfection up front without putting in the effort to deserve it in the first place. Nobody will ever be 100 percent ready for a relationship. Like Yin and Yang, you take the good in the bad and the bad in the good That’s life. Just my two cents
Alright
lol sir.. thats ur issue and why many relationships that should end DONT END cause of that delusionl sense of "loyaltiy" and "honor" to a person who now in a behavior pattern that ruins shit..
aka should i remain with u if say u start engaging in dumb shit that effects both of us..
why should I HAVE TO BE PUNISHED and BARE UR BURDENS..
people want u to stay so they that thrust and off load shit they cause on to others then get mad when that person has a line like "UH NO THANKS"
so its a two way street.. u gont get to impose a "logic" and igorne it on the other side of this.. 😂
mistakes are fine and really not at all a reason to walk out..
BUTT
BEHAVIOR PATTERNS are a different story..
fyi nobody DESERVES ANYTHING FROM ANYONE... nobody is obligated to anybody unless they AGREE in a mutual agreement...
if ur my partner and u make a oof/mistake here and there .. thats fine.. butt if it becomes a behavior pattern... UR BREAKING THE AGREEMENT... im no longer obligated to hold up my end sir.. if anything in this case.. U SHOULD BE GRATEFUL TO ME THAT IM STILL STICKING AROUND..
also lets go back to deserve
"without putting in the effort to deserve it in the first place"
lets use a slightly off topic example for this..
does an overweight person "deserve" a fit healthy fine looking person?
are u saying because they didnt put effort into themselves to also be fit healthy and well groomed that they dont deserve said supreme waifu/husbando..?
u get what u get.. there is no DESERVE...
then u work/putt in effort to maintain it.. or u dont.. and both cause can result in bood and bad.. simple..
im responding to u literally cause u said this
"I’m reading through these comments and I see why relationships never last."
u have zero clue why peoples relationships did or didnt last..
again u statement kinda implies there are RULES that if u follow it it will last.. ignoring reality of LIFE and SHIT HAPPENS and PEOPLE CHANGE
and that if u break these "rules" ur relationship wont last.. which ignores all the time the still do despite bs...
the simpliest answer... if one or both make it work.. it will last... period..
there are no rules no dos and donts.. cause all kinds of relationships exist..
my advise alway is.. I DONT KNOW UR LIFE OR THE PERSON UR WITH SO MY ADVISE WHICH WORKS FOR ME MIGHT BE BAD FOR U.. so YOU and you alone need to figure it out.. there are no rules..
yin and yang is goofy too... some people have like no ying in their lives really while some have almost no yang.. and it still works..
some people will not accept BS and they do fine..
usually no bs people weed thru the bs people and end up with other no bs people.. 😂
i will not follow u from a house out into a card board box if ur life goes to shit...
why should i be punished WITH YOU for ur actions..?
loyality is a double edge sword.. its used also to TRAP PEOPLE.. to force them to remain beholden to people fking up over and over...
personally for ME..
that sense of I/THEY dont DESERVE anything nor THEM/ME feeling ENTILTED to things(persons)
not making a big fuss over MISTAKES yet give nor groud to bad behavior patterns.. usually results in being able to BE REASONABLE and not deluded by "feelings" and thus able to MOVE ON from people that are making life more of a hassle and stressfull.. the fast u move on from people like that the sooner u can get back out and find more people..
life is too short.. and perception of time goes by faster and faster as we age.. 😂
i got a simple rule.. its not about being right or wrong.. its about understanding and no manipulation..
if people in general get the impression u being understanding of them regardless of who's right or wrong... people are not only more recpetive butt also more understanding of you.. and then both are more like to work together and actknowledge their own wrongs and work to correct them..
aka trust issues and lack of communication aka understanding.. they'll "communicate" alright by yelling fighting and trying to point out each others flaws and use it agaisnt each other.. xD
all my relationships ended on MUTUAL TERMS...
i really hate ur ying and yang methaphor cause reality isnt black and white.. there is no "good vs evil"
we are a specturm.. 😂
Facts ! I agree, it’s about teamwork
Beautifully said ❤
yet, sometimes you have to give up. if you are the one responsible for someone elses happiness, taking care of them when they cant even do that thwmselves, its not right to stay, because it affects you. i had to stay up hours a day until 2/3AM to keep my ex boyfriend alive almost every day, he forced me out of my comfort zone, ignored my issues and boundaries, made everything about himself, cheated on me and pressured me to do things. i broke up with him a week ago, and i feel great.
I used to be like this but over the last year and a half I've been leaning about myself. Learning who I really am, learning what trauma I had in my childhood and how to overcome it and how to be in relationships and I don't have these problems anymore.
Congrats to you for overcoming these problems!
FACT: You probably didn’t search for this but you certainly needed it.
Fact: you are right.
Fun fact, I’m subscribed to them.. so their videos pop up
@@bellamoon12 I ain't subscribed and the videos popped up XD They are pretty usefull tho due to finally be able to share thought about subjects that aren't easy to talk about with real life people / friends
Yes
:/ i think i needs break up with my boyfriend. he has each of these traits
*Practice self-awareness of your emotions to be able to handle a relationship.*
“What am I feeling right now? Why is that? What can I do to feel better?”
Agreed!!
I was lost on the first question...
If only it was that easy.
Did that, it evolved into "Are these feelings necessary in life? Is life meaningless without the existence of love? If so, isn't it life is meaningless by default if a person take everything logically?"
Aaaand I end up studying bunch of philosophies, now a nihilist.
BetterMints I do this every day.
I'm watching this because this guy just asked me to be his gf but he's extremely selfish, always dismisses my feelings, is super passive aggressive and has even gaslighted me. I know he likes me but i definitely deserve better.
Edit: my decisive moment to break up was sexual coercion from his part. Sexually assaulted me in the process, trying to see if he could change my mind. I didn't let him. It's almost a month post breakup and the first constant 3 weeks in a while where I haven't cried. Don't blame yourself for not seeing the signs soon enough, but once you do, get out as fast as you can. Lots of love 💚
That’s a few red flags there!
smith ugh,why do I see these types of comments everywhere? we don't need to know that u are horny af
You don't deserve anything better if you don't try at all in relationships
Tell him this very things and work em out. If things didn't work then you truly deserve better. Don't be hasty otherwise it is kinda selfish from your part as well
@@ht-cr3ms if I decided to break it off it's because i've been trying for 6 months to work it out. Why do you think I said he dismisses my feelings? My problem was that I tried too hard to make it work and I didn't leave soon enough to realize it was harming me too much.
I saw someone mention selflessness in the comments and I 100% agree with that one. I was in a 2 year relationship with this one girl named Olivia. At the start we seemed to have a good balance with the giving and receiving in the relationship. Later on she seemed to start pulling away and I had talked to her about it but she denied all of my claims and accusations. The relationship ended up being one sided to where I was doing everything I could to hold up the relationship while she put little to no effort into it. I had sleepless nights, cried a lot, starting having panic attacks(very first time ever getting them), and I did everything in my power to keep her happy and safe. Around 3 months ago I confronted her again cause the entire week before she barely talked to me and I could clearly sense she was drifting away from me and losing interest. I asked her a few questions to see what could've been going wrong then I asked what I thought was a simple question and that was "why do you love me?" 3 days went by and I got no answer so I decided to break up with her and she had nothing to say but "Ok stop texting me, have a good life ig 💀" It broke me and ruined me mentally and emotionally, my grades in school went to shit for about a week and my parents were no help at all.
I'm sorry that happened to you, but you'll definitely get a better relationship with a person who likes you and wants to be in a relationship with you. I hope you're doing better!❤
That’s rough buddy. Hope you’re doing well!
@@lekanog5834 I'm doing well, just preparing for a hurricane in Florida rn
@youngghoul1636 I am definitely doing much better, thank you, I've found a girl with so much more in common with me than the last girl and she's perfect, hopefully she can be the girl! ❤️
@@ImtoastOG congrats brother! Rooting for you 💪🏿
Being alone doesn't always mean you're lonely. Sometimes we have to find and learn to love ourselves as cliche as it might sound. Self respect and love go a long way in a relationship.
This is so true for me😔
Katie Skellington sometimes you have to learn to best your own best company:)
"Being alone doesn't always mean you're lonely." That has fuckall to do with the video.
Absolutely, we have to understand ourselves better to know what we need to improve
This character wasn't ready for a relationship because they forgot to bring clothes to the date, therapy, dinner, and sitting on the couch. Poor thing.
Blakebot J HBFSGHSCFS
@@juicecrumbs3424 interesting response but why would you share your Wi-Fi password with me?
@@jadedj5385 😂
Yeah.
Yeah he even grew a flower in his head
"she deserves best, but i can't see her with somebody else, so i became best"
nerd
cringe
The comments above are actually nerds who never been in a relationship
@@vision5092 lmaoo
Yeah I became best and then she fucking left me 😂
I just hate myself so much that I can’t accept love from anyone because i don’t think i deserve it
The saddest thing is everyone watching this even they are not in relationship
I am in a whole bunch of relationships...
☹️
JB 3Dツ shut up puss
JB 3Dツ Im in one and I’m just depressed lmao, but like I’m in a good relationship and have been for almost two years
Yatukih001 an arrow hit me there
Sign 1: If you can't handle a Minecraft server then you can't handle a relationship
hell yea mate
vAqeii if you don’t play the craft, you don’t get the shaft...
If i get the bat you better not shaft at that fucking old reposted joke
@@friedrichwulfgang3655 lol alrighty then
Fucking hackers ruin everything.
If you cannot handle yourself, it makes sens that you cannot handle a relationship.
So basically, is that gg for autistic people?
Mhm very true
I've tried hobbies from welding - to hiking - to photography and everything inbetween, but I cannot find a hobby that truly interests me.
It's tough to figure out one when there's so many, but it's also fun not knowing what you could do the next day
I used to date a girl I'm still really good friends with but she had a lot of issues with trust and getting attached, fearing that I'd run away from her. Fear of being rejected or missing out is natural for a human, but it's important to learn that you can trust and depend on other people to stay with you even when times get tough. Maybe you don't need a relationship right now and that's ok. You're not broken or weird because of that. You're learning. Everyone is constantly learning about themselves and about others. It's completely normal to not feel ready for romance. Take some time, gain that confidence in yourself, learn to love yourself even if others don't. And when you're ready, people will notice. Relationships are naturally hard. If you keep exploring, learning, and taking risks along the way, you'll find one that suits you.
Mira Pistorius I really really needed this
Mira Pistorius same reason my girl left me last week😔😭. Hope she’s doing good
❤
You know, I've wondered a lot about staying friends with people you were once intimate with. For me, I don't understand how you can do it. I always used to think that I would be that kind of person, but the reality is different. I'm very slow to trust and open up, but once that barrier has been crossed, once those defenses are down, it's something I can't take back. I can't pretend it never happened. To go back from that, it would feel like I'm deliberately holding myself back and not talking about the elephant in the room. It would be disingenuous, because the things that led to me feeling drawn to someone in the first place wouldn't have changed. Despite all my other mixed feelings and whatever else transpired between us. It just doesn't seem healthy. But more power to you if you can make it work somehow.
@@Harkz0r you know, I read once that when two people remain friends after a break up they are either still in love or they never were...
There are times when I remember that quote and I see it happen a lot.
You know it would be interesting to discover the extent of how low self esteem ruins your life after all many mental conditions such as depression or anxiety can be caused by low self esteem. I think, I am not an expert.
Also keep up with your great and helpful videos
I would get nervous whenever people used to dm me and i felt like i had to try too hard to try to impress them since they would get bored of me. Point is i let my anxiety get the best of me and because of that, i lost contact w many friends and loved ones
Yes, true.. you will think that person will leave you one day because of your insecurities.
Appreciate your time in watching our videos! It is a possibility, what do you believe would help them?
Someone once told me "if u think relationship is not for u then don't do it, don't put someone else thru pain just cuz u can't handle a relationship". It make so much sense that I'm single for 3 years now. At this point I don't want someone to like me, I want me to like someone :(
Shit I wish someone said that to my ex, instead I was her rebound.
from the way you've phrased it i'm wondering if perhaps you're aromantic? or somewhere on the spectrum?
@@squirrel8272 yea I've been questioning if I'm asexual since last year
@@hiro-sl5og ah well best of luck with figuring yourself out
This is absolute facts. FOR REAL
This was needed. I have a few of these. Therapy is my next move.
Wish you the best in therapy!
I really like how you didn't just tell us the signs, you told us how we can become better and what we can do to counteract these things to make ourselves ready. Thank you a lot for this! :)
Mystery Garden there never was signs to begin with. It’s reality
Happy to hear that! Hope you can apply these in your life!
Why does the man’s eyebrows look like cigarettes?
no-name 😂😂😂
damit, i cant unsee it.
* a jok
😂😂😂😂
no-name 😂😂😂😂🙄
Relationship anxiety I would say is the most common, and the most unfortunate. Because you aren't harming the other person, but instead you're technically harming yourself by letting your insecurities bottle up inside instead of letting yourself love someone else and talk to them about your insecurities. From my experience men suffer a lot from relationship anxiety, but they don't like to show it/admit it. And there are a lot of sad reasons as to why that is.
Why is that?
@@caressemondine6415 Because of the stereotypes/standards that are mostly put on men (they can apply to women just not as often) that say men have to be "strong" but the masculine version of being "strong" means you don't express your emotions.
Present. Idk, i was thinking it always had to do in the past that results to this.
I hate to do it. Because it makes me cry and insanely scared but I am doing it because I love this person. I hate to cry but I do when I feel vulnerable.
When men start to open up, express feelings or insecurities woman fade away because they aren't masculine
it's fine if you can't handle a relationship, but keep the relationship still until someone speaks up about it IF POSSIBLE. my gf and i broke up almost a year ago because i felt as if i wasn't good enough, it was a selfish act, in all honesty, because i never tried to ask for her opinion in this situation and left her heart broken, we got back and are trying to improve our relationship
Glad you're improving after the mistakes you made and learned from it!
@@Psych2go still going rn :D
when you're single for the majority of your life, being in a relationship is a completely alien feeling. I tried a relationship once, didn't work out and now i don't feel any urge to have a lover anymore.
Same
Same here !! My feelings are gone lol
I'm going through this rn😓
Dont need to force yourself to have a partner due to social norms if it doesn't suit you. Only do it because you find someone you truly love enough to change your habits (very hard to change habits the older we get though, unfortunately).
@@sicaris415 reason why there is 70 yrs men who still never felt the touch of a women
“You put yourself first before anyone else”
Yeahhhh I kinda have the opposite problem... which is why I can’t be in a relationship
Truth!!!
The care and compassion you can give to yourself is something that isn't wrong, and is a great gift to receive.
If you have health problems, then you get them solved. If you need to feel good about yourself, do something that will bring out your stronger traits, or improve the ones that bother you, because you put the dent into that big chunk of things to do, and that's a start.
Listen to Torches by Aimer, too.
@@lemongreentea60 I wish that were true.
I feel the same way. I don't think I can attract people any other way than being super giving. So it's being very altruistic or being alone :(
Self love should be the first priority
I’m tired of being called out
Call me then
Same
Skywolf Uber Gamer oh lord
I am tired of being poor
Your probably a bitch
Lack of communication
Not being honest with one another
Not trusting each other
Not being consistent
Being insecure
Lack of respect
👏
Yup!
I am making a good decision by not dating anyone until I figure out how to be less toxic toward the people I love. I believe I can be better, so I will work on it. I actually think this is another thing that shows you're not ready for a relationship. Before going into a relationship, you really have to self-evaluate (don't get this mistaken with self-criticize).
^^^this! Good on u btw 🫶🏻
I mean, it can mean self-criticism, so long as it is objective, optimistic and does not put yourself down
I would be glad if someone could explain the difference between self-evaluation and self-criticism.
This is why alone time is important in relationships as we're to busy to self reflect
*has some trouble with a Person who I don't know loves me rn*
Psych2go: 5 Signs you can't handle a relationship
lol same
Sameeee
*s a m e*
Such a coincidence ;-;
SAMEEE
SKSKSKSKSKKSKSK sameeeee😂😭😭😭
me: knows can't handle relationships
still watch...
🤧
Same
If that isnt a mood i dont know what is
SAME
Saiki Kusuo damn same. I feel like I want to get to know my crush better but know that even if he likes me, I don’t think I’ll be ready. For me its hard to be vulnerable, idk why.
While hard at times , Accepting that no one will ever love you is freeing. And hatred of one-self is a good way of staying alive. After all if you feel pain you are still alive.
Builds discipline and stronger mind
5 sign you can't handle a relationship
Me:Bold of you to assume i have one.
Lmao ikr
@@Leaftigger Were so, Pitiful.
*bold of them to assume someone likes me*
@@caprisuhn8351 Exept yor family they do like you.
This whole comment chain is the most relatable thing I’ve seen today
I realize that both my ex and I were not ready for a relationship. I was super co-dependent and he also needed to work on himself. It sucks that he was the one to break it off, but now i think he did the right thing for both of us. I wouldn't have been able to break it off. I hope he finds happiness in himself and I hope i find it too.
Hi I experienced the same thing now, how do you cope when he broke up with you? I still missed our good things together but sadly he doesn’t want me anymore
MY situation is exactly the same Lizeth. But only I was the one to break it off... I wish I could show her how much I love her. But I'm just not ready to handle that. So many responsibilities. But I'd love her back someday. 🥺
My last relationship was the same situation.
I'm in this situation right now, but we're still in a break phase. We're not making decisions yet. I wish we find a way to figure out, even if we have to be a part. I want the best for him and myself
im also co-dependent in our relationship w my ex. she had to break up w/ me because the relationship wasn't doing us any good anymore. I'm determined to work on my self, and try my luck again with her when I'm ready. I miss her so much.
Every time I have a crush on someone or even start dating someone I close my self and become cold and start to not want to be alone with them I don’t know why I do this and hate it, I want to stop doing this
I had this too until i was virgin. Maybe it was becasuse my parents are like that they kinda reject their child if he/she find gf/bf (me and my siblings)
I feel the same way. I call it detachment syndrome. However i dont meet people who want date me that much at all.
Ahh, this was me when I had my first relationship. I was just too scared and not being confident and worried that things might go wrong. Just be confident in yourself
I read that there are people who fall for a person and if that person likes them back then they stop liking her/him
Lemme check
Found it
aromantic.wikia.com/wiki/Lithromantic
It may not be (It's pretty rare) this but give it a look
@@MagisterArtiumExylon Thank you, this was exactly my gf before she broke with me
you can battle through thick and thin and communicate with each other is like the best foundation .
Relationships last when the communication is strong
*Thx for reminding me that im going to die alone*
Don't feel. Bad you get to play the song of freedom more
Same dude
@@Thecatnipproject god I wish we had ww3.
@@golagiswatchingyou2966 it means going to the range and firing your guns
Relationships are overrated. You're doing fine.
Signs you shouldn't be in a relationship:
1) this shows up on your recommended
thoj muas yes lol
thoj muas ...bruh I’m feelin deadass attacked 💯😂
Yep just broke up and this popped up
Like if i had one XD
I-
This channel is great. A sweet sounding voice tells you everything about you is wrong. And then there is no one to be angry at, then you can start trying to be better.
That's the goal! Everybody makes mistakes and you only improve yourself by understanding it better
I have been shut off for over 8 years and now trying once more, this video did help and gave good insight.
Glad we could be a stepping stone for you
Personally I like being alone, even when I'm laughing and talking with a friend what is constantly running through my mind is that I can't wait for the silence to return
Alexander king same, I also don’t like it when my friends call me everyday or having conversations everyday
that’s exactly how i feel. social interaction is very exhausting for me and even if i’m best friends with someone i don’t want to talk and hangout everyday
You can have a partner that you don’t talk to and hangout with everyday, and it honestly makes your partner more attracted to you because it makes it seem like your busy and have a life that doesn’t involve to much, even if your not doing anything in reality. Girls love a busy guy
Same, although its like I want to go out with people but only for a short time and only one person at a time. I miss when I was in college and could just say I have homework to do. I'd rather just watch people interact, although most people find it creepy.
That’s....a little depressing..
yep, my biggest problem is co dependency. Whenever i’m in a relationship/dating, i can’t get me self to be happy when they’re not around. I usually just wait until they’re able to text again or just being available again. I just can’t help but feel sad, lost, anxious and upset whenever they’re gone for the time being. It sucks, and I wanna learn how to fix this so badly. I do well on hiding this from my partner, but it sucks how I have to feel so depressed and keep it to myself.
same same same same same
me too. aghhh it sucks.
You dont do Well by hiding it, trust me you have to be honest about it
Like the video said it has to do with the way your parents raised you whether you were neglected or abused the easiest way to fix it is to unroll the repressed subconscious traumatic feelings caused by it and learn the hurtful facts pertaining to what actually
happened to you
Same but I'm working on it. Codependent people usually lost connections with their other relationships so try to bond with your friends when your partner is not around, it actually helps and I'm gradually healing. Being opened about the feelings are healthy too, try to tell it to your partner so that she's aware with your feelings and probably makes some ways to help you cope with it. Connection is the key. 🥰
i couldnt even handle a friendship let alone a relationship
You saying that makes me feel like you’d be good company because when I’m around anyone my brain goes YEET
Friendship and partnership are not the same... :')
Bruh then y’all should just be alone for the rest of y’all lives if y’all can’t even handle a friendship 🤣
GG Mate that’s pretty fucked up man what’s your problem?
@@ggmate1172 Wow you're an asshole.
i feel like my past few relationships have just been codependent and they make it seem like its my responsibility to consistently be there whenever they need. I NEED MY OWN TIME TYVM
that's right, alone time should be times of reflection
Who’s never been in a relationship and watching this 🤣
Lmao 🤝🏻
A person with commitment phobia
I was once, it was nice, I guess, I don't really know, it ended 17 years ago
Fuck off
Alyssa Valdovinos good luck to you. Nice profile picture by the way
“What are some dating issues youre going through?”
*She ghosted me*
dude same
Same, thats why I deleted all of my dating apps.
It do be like that, just say “Thank You” and move on
Its all good grab a beer because the gangs all here
th-cam.com/video/zeKE0NHUtUw/w-d-xo.html (a nice transitional intro)
th-cam.com/video/7QfEX6ScOVg/w-d-xo.html (Next time just be thanos my dude)
maybe she wants attention
Before watching this vid, i already thought i had a relationship anxiety. After watching this vid, i'm sure i have a relationship anxiety.
Emma Haezebrouck I have rocd and I get triggered easily, ruminate, and more but now I know better and it gets better with time it’s easier to manage in the relationship. Relationship anxiety gets better
Awareness is the first step in improving yourself
i think the lack of a realtionship is already a pretty strong indicator.
True
It's not exactly that I want people read my mind. As an introvert, I have difficulties in sharing my thoughts and let them know what is really happening. So I don't even try to an approach. I tend to avoid conflict a lot so I prefer let everything in the same way while trying to keep myself at a certain distance if cannot just abandon everything.
I'm a little bit codependent too. Anyway, my life is just miserable.
Yes! I am similar
you've answered all the reasons why you are miserable, therefore you know how to fix it.
@@PF-gi9vv not necessarily. It is possible to understand the problem(s) without understanding any solutions. I have this problem. I understand my problems, but I don't know what the solutions are.
reading this infuriates me because it reminds me of my old self... You can do it and work on yourself. I am an introvert but communication shouldn't be hard either. All those internal self reflections should help us articulate our thoughts better as we grow older. Unless you are intentionally avoiding such change because of fear.
I am also shy + Introverted, which are deadly combos. However, with enough work on yourself, it is possible. It also becomes easier to communicate with your love one, similar to how you communicate with your family. It takes time for people, and it is different for everyone. However, if you really want to get out of your comfort zone to grow, take communicate class or go to social events. Even introverts can do that once awhile.
@@richardparker3273 that is a very good explanation
Reason 6: you're poor like me and can't afford a relationship.
Yes Good point here
@killermeh meh If ya really wanna be those types of people, then we men usually only date for dat ass and not "tRuE lOvE"
Dont listen to these blue pill cucks, you need to be able to provide to women.
True dat. Ifu cant even afford u a house let alone a car. Then ur not going far in a relationship. Without money ur not living ur life so how can u except to live a life with someone else
@@gdkeashusoldaccount1861 yeah says someone who hasnt actually done that
what if im just ugly? that doesnt help does it
Hammer Addiction4u I learned that if you blame yourself for such things like looks it’s never about that in a relationship but rather about self criticism and low self esteem which isn’t really healthy for a relationship either.
everyone's beautiful in someone's eyes. Kevin^ is right. the notion of beauty is more about yourself than someone else. love who you are. maybe make yourself better. but stop hating the things you can't change and realize that's what makes you who you are. jesus, didn't think i'd ever be speaking in cliches
mountain boy thank you for your beautiful comment. 💕
Looks only matter to woman that aren't that bright or that use men. Most women are turned on by ideas like ' you trust me?' ' you understand what I'm saying?'.
Heather J'nel well caring about looks isn’t bad at all, but the way some people care is wrong. Many people (yes men too) do care about the way they look but unfortunately what many care about are things they can’t change like how their face may look or other unique things. We have to teach ourselves and others to simply love ourselves despite the facts we have flaws in the eyes of society.
Caring about how you dress or how you do your make up aren’t things that somebody should be ashamed. In fact everyone should care about how they look because we do feel good if we look good.
The girl in this video is a real one. She doesn't mind dating a person with a single plant for hair
Green flag!
Relationship anxiety is a thing... I found a good guy or lemme say he found me and I'm forever thinking negative thoughts
Update.
The guy I thought was good... Yes the one who found me, Ghosted me 😢.
Maybe my anxiety pushed him away 🤷♀️.
We move>>>
this is where I'm at right now 😭😭😭
Why do you always think negative thoughts?
@leslie look up dismissive avoidant attachment style.
feel u sis
i just give up on relationships tbh... idk it just never works out with any guy...... idk maybe somethings wrong with me.
Me: Single, hopeless, depressed, saying wrong things at the wrong moment to the right people...
Brain: *j u s t i n c a s e*
Right on point
😩🥲
You'll will get there bud no worries
haha same :')
@@prinsmauritsz319 I don’t know I’m really struggling 3 and half years of trying later and no progress what so ever
*#1 Relationship you should nurture - is with your own self*
If you don't love yourself, why should anybody else?
When you love all of life and everyone should too
But why should I expect them to? Why should I be selfish and prioritize on oneself and they're desires because at the end of the day I know what they're after
I relate to this i can't even like myself lol
@@wisdomfruit7162 I think you are onto something but I am not quite grasping the whole message. Paraphrase please, if you want a response.
@@ayeshamalik7133 How old are you?
@@wisdomfruit7162 thx for ur advice rlly sad and powerful I think my friend already realises i hate myself and I am sorry but it is really hard to like myself if I have nothing to say good about myself, Sorry but it true
1. 0:46 you put yourself first before anyone else.
2. 1:39 you’re prideful and you think you’re always right
3. 2:27 you always depend on your partner to make you happy
4. 3:21 you expect people to read your mind
5. 4:08 you have commitment issues
Thanks for the timestamps
Dating struggle? - Meeting someone, falling love, the other person confesses and ghosts you the next day. Hello anxiety and bitterness.
So factual though👏🤦🏾♀️
Stefanie Espunkt I can relate such a horrible feeling...
Sorry to hear that, you'll find someone better for you
I literally ghost people who want to get to know me. I'm just so used to my own personal time and hobbies
It's a double edge sword. What are your thoughts?
Well have some character and tell them whats up instead of handling it wrong with no courage and giving them a negativ experience. Thats all you gotta do if you not interested. We all responsibility and that one isnt hard.
Same
That is definitely me I've been thinking to apologize to that someone I did this to I just have to set healthy boundaries I love my personal time
god, same. giving that up for someone else feels like losing a part of myself. i can only handle it for so long before i start to go insane
So everyone should first fill themselves with love and then have a relationship where you can give them love and care fully without being scared or selfish . So selfcare first. Thank you for sharing 😇❤️❤️
I read “fill” as “kill” oops
@@wozzwald7869 😂😂😂
Laveena Makhaik damn I guess I’m never having a relationship then
@@christianthornton7688 its ok. There is nothing wrong with solitude. In fact its a beautiful feeling. Insted to understanding other, understand yourself and fill urself with joy and peace 😇
Laveena Makhaik too bad I want a relationship, but yet have zero confidence.
My biggest problem is that I'm selfish and I feel guilty about it all the time. I want to improve and in fact I try a lot to do favors to other people or help them even if it requires some of my time. I'm also a good listener and I try to put empathy and solidarity above every other value in life. Thing is: more often than not this behaviour exhausts me so mich if it prevents me from having my "alone" moments, where there's me and only me doing whatever I feel like doing and they have to be frequent enoigh or I start feeling extremely nervous and anxious.
The feeling of inadequacy in the relationship... I feel it so much. This and the fear of commitment, even though this is my first relationship. This feelings are so strong and connected to my anxiety issues that they change the perception of my reality. They change my humour costantly to the point that I feel anxious around my boyfriend, sexual desire just leaves for who knows how long, my sentiment is on a trial again and again and again. It's a cycle of feeling in love with the person, than not in love, than feeling afraid, then in love again and so on.
I've been going to therapy for almost 10 years and this relationship has been going on for almost 4 years. I needn't mention that my therapy sessions of these last 4 years have all been around this issue, basically.
He's a wonderful person. I've been blessed to meet him and to be loved by him. No one would've stayed in these conditions. Hell, I probably don't even deserve him. I'm fighting hard to stay, to make him stay. I want to solve my problems while I'm still with him, cause we both see so much potential in our relationship...
An example of a bad relationship is Italy and Germany during ww2
Lmfao my ex was German and I’m Italian and it was the worst relationship ever..😂😂 soooo
What about North Korea and the USA since the Korean War?
Italy lost both World Wars lmao
Chad Lobster 😂😂
@@lesshuman00 no they actualy won ww1
“What are some dating issues youre going through?”
i dont talk to people 😎
Facts 🤫
FR tho
Literally same. I cannot talk to him at all bc i get so terrified
I love wearing shiny silky polyester shirts tucked into a long pair of black dress slacks and some women absolutely love it.I stay slim and in shape and as of now there are 5 women between Raleigh and Greensboro that have it made it known that they are interested in me.I just get stuck in wanting to ask them out.It is messed up.I love dressing up and getting the attention but don't go all out with the communicating part.😏
I overshare when I like someone n it pushes them away.
1 sign your not ready for a relationship:
Your watching this vid
th-cam.com/video/oorVWW9ywG0/w-d-xo.html
Ok?
Nah, I don't think so. I know this is a joke, haha, but I just watched this video out of curiosity, and to, uh... See how many of these related to my ex jfdk;aslfjdsak; XD
@@willowthewisp2725 I was totally broken when the love of my life left me it was so hard for me &I almost gave up if not a friend who directed me to a very good and powerful man called DR ola who helped me bring back the love of my life and now she treat me with so much love ❣️ and care. I don't know what your problem are passing through but with he did for me I know he can help you .so try and talk to him on WhatsApp:+2349069313955 RO Email him on DrOlaogaga@gmail.com
Actually, I am glad to see I did not fall under any of those signs :)
One quote help me its hard but hope it might help atleast 1 or 2 people ...
STOP SEARCHING FOR HAPPINESS IN OTHER PERSON..ITS IN YOURSELF..ITS U 👍👍
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