What Happens When Narcissists Go Silent?

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 10 ก.ย. 2024

ความคิดเห็น • 423

  • @triplekids3
    @triplekids3 3 ปีที่แล้ว +48

    9 months no contact and I’m loving my life finally

  • @annettefabiano3578
    @annettefabiano3578 3 ปีที่แล้ว +76

    I don't understand how they have the energy to keep doing the mean things they do. Don't they ever get burned out? It seems like an exhausting way to live.

    • @flod4821
      @flod4821 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Lol 😆

    • @aadtya100
      @aadtya100 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      narc: "we wants it! we needs it!"

    • @blueberrydefendersuperb1606
      @blueberrydefendersuperb1606 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Yes! They do eventually.

    • @MJ-qb5ph
      @MJ-qb5ph 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @@melw3313 My brother and his wife are an overt and covert respectively - he had a heart attack at 56. She had a stroke at 52. Before this knowledge I didn’t get it. Now ‘so within so without’ sums it up totally. It does catch up with them and still they keep going!

    • @farbionstudios
      @farbionstudios 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Everything that is done is to get the upper hand it seems like

  • @kathrynkenyon785
    @kathrynkenyon785 3 ปีที่แล้ว +20

    I NEVER knew the silent treatment was "abuse" and it is the one thing I've experienced from others... significant others, parents, friends, partners than any other thing.

  • @MichaelSmith-jz7xg
    @MichaelSmith-jz7xg 3 ปีที่แล้ว +23

    What happens when they go silent? Relief & peace of mind, that’s what!

  • @kandidarling9451
    @kandidarling9451 2 ปีที่แล้ว +29

    I took my power back and my soul has been returned to me!
    Thank you for your work! 💕

  • @jasonbrowning546
    @jasonbrowning546 3 ปีที่แล้ว +27

    My crime was loving her.
    My punishment was despair and hurt that I’d never felt before.
    My consequence was a positive gift, a beautiful soul came to me and guided me to Spirituality.
    So within So without 🙏💚🙌

    • @shaniecegullison
      @shaniecegullison 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Love that

    • @Nyumc99
      @Nyumc99 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

      He just got rid of an avoidant attachment style partner. Thats all. Anyone that he met after, would feel like an angel for him. Education is key. !

  • @deborahwentworth8792
    @deborahwentworth8792 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    You are so right.I am bearing 70 years old.Been with the narc for 24 years.Too much maturity to put up with the narc any longer.Now divorced and Happy

  • @jonathanomahony688
    @jonathanomahony688 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    You are so right in what you are saying about narcissists.
    After 35 years with my husband, I decided that I had enough of his behaviour.
    So I finished our marriage and went solo.
    It was hard at first but with the space I began to move forward.
    I took back my own life and the power to live for me.
    I did self love, self respect, but most of all I did no contact.
    I began to heal within and than outside.
    Life began to feel better for me and I looked amazing.
    People began to see a new me and see how happy I was without him.
    Him on the other hand was miserable, upset , full of anger and full of health issues.
    After 35 years together this was the first time I felt that I was living for me.
    Thanks for the silent treatment as this time helped me to heal within.
    Anyone reading this please accept that you can do this, I did After 35 years and so can you.
    There are never going to change but you have the power within you to say enough is enough.
    You are the only one that can change this relationship.
    So go do it , you owe it to yourself.
    You are the light within you , who has the power to change this.
    Turn on that switch within yourself and go and make the changes.
    You are more than Enough for your own life.
    You will make it , I did After 35 years.
    Life is so so good now for me I wouldn't go back for anything.
    You to will feel this once you make the move.
    Go on do it today don't waste another minute on them.
    You can do all things within you.
    You are the power not them.
    Best of luck going ahead.

  • @anndillard8681
    @anndillard8681 3 ปีที่แล้ว +37

    Exactly.. focus on yourself - not the narcissist..

  • @stormchasingirl1133
    @stormchasingirl1133 3 ปีที่แล้ว +57

    Mine has been silent and moved on for years now. So thankful! My life is getting better.

    • @reesedaniel5835
      @reesedaniel5835 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@aftergreece1 True and it's a Catch 22 if the narc is part of your family of origin because you will be required to forfeit any type of inheritance along with pretty much any type of support system. Seems like it's always Win/Win for the narcopaths and their duped followers and Lose/Lose for the scapegoats. Stay around and be destroyed by them or go no contact and lose all support systems. I've noticed that the Hive Minded narcs in your "friend" and "acquaintance" circles seem to "activate" once you go no contact with a narc family system and then they (in your social circles) show their fangs and attack as well, forcing you to become completely isolated. I believe these people are controlled like puppets by demonic hierarchies.

    • @robertcristando8007
      @robertcristando8007 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Reese Daniel
      But if they’re narc’s, are they really part of a support system or a hindrance system?
      Mourn their loss, and move on.

    • @paulinetflanaganbunt9985
      @paulinetflanaganbunt9985 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@reesedaniel5835 ⁰⁰

    • @MrBreak35100
      @MrBreak35100 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      My off and on ex returned again after 7 years.Gave her another chance because of my low self worth.She left again with another.DO NOT LET THAT PERSON IN.ITS ALL A LIE.

  • @mjcjjcc7
    @mjcjjcc7 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    I learned a lot from the narcissist in my life. No regrets.

  • @sheliamccullough9505
    @sheliamccullough9505 3 ปีที่แล้ว +21

    Thats exactly what he's done..... He hoovered me twice and then he went completely silent....... I've been feeling pretty bad until today. I feel better like I've overcome this bs... Im 100% NO CONTACT...... I have nothing to say or nothing to prove. I dont need closer I dont need SHIT!!!!!.... I won...

  • @peacefaith560
    @peacefaith560 3 ปีที่แล้ว +29

    we had a 30 yr history i met him while i was in HS ..17, the last 10 yrs has been an emotional entanglement .... I went NC, after I discarded him, he did the hoover, and now he's silent, this is sooo hard because I thought he was my friend, I knew he wasnt my husband God showed me that

    • @thehuskygirl3346
      @thehuskygirl3346 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      When I left my ex, a narcissist, 23 years ago , I never once looked back. I left him.
      No communication !!!!! He hated me for it. Ha !!! I got over him in a week. Never
      will I allow anyone to use me. I worked & kept my money. I was a nurse. I have happiness ; my own friends. I thank my God in heaven for helping me run from him. Women ; leave these dangerous men. They are evil & demonic. They don't t give a darn about you. Good riddance.
      U are sleeping with the enemy. My heart goes out to all women who are suffering
      from this demonic influence that lives in these men. Rebuke Satan!!!

    • @thehuskygirl3346
      @thehuskygirl3346 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      You are a gorgeous woman , a sweet spirit ❤ trying to help women see who this narcissist really is. God bless all your efforts to help those being tortured
      by these monsters. Yes, the silent treatment is your best weapon against
      the NARCISSCIST!!!! USE IT WOMEN !!!!

    • @thehuskygirl3346
      @thehuskygirl3346 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Right now my ex is carrying on with my dead brother's ex wife. He chased after my son's wife while he served in the army. He tried to sleep with a close cousin of mine. He is only trying to hurt me by doing this. So, it is oh , so obvious.
      I pray that Donna want get messed up real bad from associating with him. She has a good husband. She will need a coach to help her heal from this raging monster. He is only using her to hurt me .
      What a jerk & evil thing to do. I am going to pray for her. He has a girlfriend Amy. See what I mean. Narcissist Supply. Easy to see. Take note , ladies. This is happening right now. Have a good day.
      Smash this deadly influence. Close the door. Ignore them. Then you WIN !!!!!

    • @thehuskygirl3346
      @thehuskygirl3346 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      By the way. I live in Bossier City , Louisiana. Loved your VIDEO.

  • @munchey99508
    @munchey99508 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I 100% believe this is a spiritual war and also that as painful as it is it’s sometimes necessary so that we can look inside and work on our wounds. ❤ Again, thank you!

  • @clairebearie87
    @clairebearie87 3 ปีที่แล้ว +67

    Melanie you are such a kind person to keep helping so many in tough situations.

  • @l.ameenaa4669
    @l.ameenaa4669 3 ปีที่แล้ว +27

    ..Go silent !? Such an experience..
    This was an eerie time for me.
    Felt so alone, empty, confused yet revengeful.
    No closure ?!
    I wasn't buying that..

    • @l.ameenaa4669
      @l.ameenaa4669 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@deniseshipley9831 🙏 sending hugs to you..

    • @deniseshipley9831
      @deniseshipley9831 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@l.ameenaa4669 thank you.. it’s a long journey ..

    • @l.ameenaa4669
      @l.ameenaa4669 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@deniseshipley9831 hi Denise, was your message for Melanie Tonia Evans? I thought it was to me, sorry.

    • @deniseshipley9831
      @deniseshipley9831 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@l.ameenaa4669 no worries!

  • @Blueyedgal227
    @Blueyedgal227 3 ปีที่แล้ว +32

    Mine was 4 years and ended 2 years ago. I went back twice. I saw the red flags in the beginning.He had all the classic behaviors and would give me the silent treatment sometimes days. Jekyll and Hyde behaviors as he knew how to hurt me. I learned thus from the hypervigilance growing up in an abusive alcoholic environment. I always lived in the state of what's going to happen next. He asked me to leave and my abandonment was high. I'm glad I left for good but the emotional wounding has taken its toll and anxiety remains.

    • @reesedaniel5835
      @reesedaniel5835 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      I personally don't believe that wounding will ever completely heal apart from Divine Justice.

    • @aaron8903
      @aaron8903 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      It can..

  • @garybills8683
    @garybills8683 3 ปีที่แล้ว +22

    I have experienced narcissist abuse for over 37 years. A complete nightmare

    • @garybills8683
      @garybills8683 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      I’m completely exhausted. No friends no family. A shell of my former self. I want to quit my job and drive as far away as possible and never look back

    • @reesedaniel5835
      @reesedaniel5835 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@garybills8683 Isolating the offspring of Adam is their Number 1 goal (isolating us or getting us to commit suicide). Read about the two seedlines at enmity with each other in Genesis 3:15. They are of Cain (who murdered his righteous half brother Abel).

    • @garybills8683
      @garybills8683 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Maybe suicide because I’m completely miserable

    • @tinafitzpatrick2437
      @tinafitzpatrick2437 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Just take one day at a time. Gary. I know how you feel.
      Suicide is not the way out. You are needed in this world. Never give up.

    • @taniaspence4879
      @taniaspence4879 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@garybills8683 you are worthy because you’re alive, you’re alive because YOU are worthy my friend ❤️😊

  • @munchey99508
    @munchey99508 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    I love this video so much! I too was involved with 2 narcissists, back to back. I thought I had healed from my marriage to a narcissist but obviously I didn’t because I literally chose the same (actually worse than my first narcissist) Thank you! I am now taking a deep dive and healing my childhood wounds/trauma from being raised by a narcissistic mother (and I think father as well). God bless you for sharing! 🙏🏼❤️ The world needs it! ❤️

  • @pottersmtnsportsskiboardre8798
    @pottersmtnsportsskiboardre8798 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Had brain surgery several months ago and never felt such cruelty...too much to tell. Happy to find this intelligent Auzzie!

  • @swiftkarma4436
    @swiftkarma4436 3 ปีที่แล้ว +21

    When I was with a narc I experienced adrenal fatigue. Once I kicked him out of my life and moved forward I lost all the weight I had put on in less than 1 month.

    • @pinnakal1
      @pinnakal1 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      My adrenals stayed fatigued

    • @godizself1
      @godizself1 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Visceral reactions of the thought of the narc. Every car that is similar I'm scanning licensed plates. I scan my residence before I park because he could show up in hiding. It's completely stupid. Silence and NC is power and unnerving. But I'm deeply rooted in NC and this is freedom.

    • @freshcharge
      @freshcharge 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      So if I understand you, you are blaming another person for your own laziness? Holy hell. Watch some more narc videos and ask yourself. "Do I fit this mold?" Plus adrenal fatigue not an accepted medical diagnosis. Stop blaming other people would be my first step advice.

    • @kimsikorski5691
      @kimsikorski5691 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@freshcharge I guess you don't know how the adrenal glands work. When you have a lot of stress in your life the adrenals are on overdrive and never stop.
      When you finally get rid of what is causing you all of this stress you will feel a difference. Only time that the adrenals don't go back to normal is when you have had so much stress in your life like a narcissistic person in your life, to taking care of a loved one that is very sick and you have to watch them die in front of you and so much more different kinds of stress. Stress is the number one killer. Believe what you want. At one point in my life I finally got away from someone that I believe is a narcissist. I was with him for over 20 yrs but with going to therapy I was able to get my life back and was able to get away from him and my life got better.
      At one point I thought I found the man God wanted to be with. I noticed that my weight was coming off with doing no exercise at all. It was because I was actually happy and he made me feel special and said the right things but he was just another narcissistic person.
      But when I truly believed he actually meant the stuff that he said to me I never felt better about myself and I noticed that my stomach went down quite a bit.
      Its amazing what stress can do to the body.
      I just wish one day I can get the stress to leave, some way some how so that I can get me back.
      When you have adrenal problems you can't go and work out like most would to lose weight because it will cause stress and cause you to gain weight. I wish I could master what I need to do for myself to release all of this stress I hold in due to all the stress in my life.
      But since I had the courage to leave my ex and get my own place and was feeling good about my life, I had 2 other people come into my life that caused a lot of narcissistic abuse and losing my little Yorkie that I took care of for 6 yrs 24/7. But that was a choice to take care of him even though it was very stressful but if it wasn't for him I wouldn't be here today.
      He was a very special boy.
      And a part of me died that day. Because I had to do what I never could do but I had to and it was the worst thing ever. Even worse then when the man I thought was my best friend and friend only raped me.
      But unless you have had massive stress in your life you have no clue what the adrenals do to your body.
      Hope this helps. God bless. 🙏💞🙏

    • @brendarewan7441
      @brendarewan7441 26 วันที่ผ่านมา

      Thank you for this info. Never heard of it. God led me here to see this. I researched it. Im going to follow the self help strategies to heal. Thanks again. 😊

  • @alanalambert1178
    @alanalambert1178 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    Thank you Melanie your spot on. I'm never going back. Loving myself and focussing on me thank you for your kind words of wisdom.
    God bless

  • @wartricy2531
    @wartricy2531 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Gives nothing he's superior.. I love the silence from this narc.

  • @lovingfreedom5367
    @lovingfreedom5367 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    you have this nailed and are so right. I have followed your program it is so empowering - I feel the best I have in years .

  • @blanchecoker9807
    @blanchecoker9807 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    I just have to tell you that you are spot on!!! I have just started following you and I'm grateful for your work. You are helping me and countless others navigate back to our true selves. I am still with my narcissist. My story is long and very complicated. I don't know if I am going to leave my husband. I know I cannot change him and I still see good in him. I had severe sexual abuse as a young child until I was 13. The abuse I have been in therapy for and i have come a long way but the abuse I suffered in the past from my husband I am now trying to overcome. He has changed for the better but I am haunted by our past and how extremely abusive he has been. I have put up strong boundaries but I still have to walk on egg shells. I am gaining as much strength as I can to save my marriage my family and my self. Thank you for all you do and God bless you.

  • @anndillard8681
    @anndillard8681 3 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    yes, they run away - escape with all sorts of excuses.. no accountability

  • @sandramadrigal6320
    @sandramadrigal6320 3 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    I think mine deleted all his social media. I think he found someone else and doesn't want any way of that person contacting me while at the same time securing he can come back to me if that doesn't workout to say "I haven't been with anyone, haven't even gone on a date" as he has done before.

  • @ninan8406
    @ninan8406 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    Thank you! This was the only video out of a bajillion videos I have watched that matched my experience 100%... I learned so much about the reasons behind my crazy Narc ex’s actions! Thank you!!!

    • @ran92801
      @ran92801 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Me too

    • @livewell_79
      @livewell_79 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Me too.i thought she (my partner)was just mean..but it goes far beyond that.

  • @lostintheseventies7969
    @lostintheseventies7969 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    TRUE,YOU GET PUNISHED FOR OTHER WOMENS RELATIONSHIPS.YOU DONT UNDERSTAND WHY YOU GET BLAMED FOR THINGS YOU DONT DO.BUT YES,ITS BECAUSE HIS BEEN DOING SOMETHING HE SHOULDNT

  • @willowway42
    @willowway42 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    Thank you so much Melanie. Re-listening to this made me cry. Thank you, thank you... gratitude beyond words ♡

  • @peterknyk1942
    @peterknyk1942 3 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    Hi Melanie! Thank you for this tonight, again! I lost connection at the end but so thoroughly loved how you continued to again steer everything back to work on oneself and work on ones inner life because that is the most important thing that I know I can do....without NARP I would NOT have that perspective with purpose....I thank you for your continued guidance in helping me get to that place. Much love to you, Melanie! ❤️🦋❤️

  • @mariankeller5852
    @mariankeller5852 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    When you battle with a narcissist it's not the person your at war with...but the demon inside of them..

  • @ms.bonniebeaver
    @ms.bonniebeaver 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Thank you for being here. SO greatful for your help this past yr

  • @huko4266
    @huko4266 3 ปีที่แล้ว +43

    What happens when the narcissist goes silent? WHO CARES.

    • @robertcristando8007
      @robertcristando8007 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Exactly!!!

    • @turkeeg7644
      @turkeeg7644 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Thanks....I needed that.

    • @proudamerican7662
      @proudamerican7662 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Yes! Except it is not as simple as you naively put it. You see when there are CHILDREN and their emotional well-being in the equation, YOU are in a quagmire, a spider's web, a torture chamber. It would be paradise as you simply put it if the narc GTFOYL, but the narc is there as long as children are children and need the parents. The worry of when are we going to court again, when will the police be involved, what will the next smear campaign be, how will you be cheated financially, MOST IMPORTANT how will the kids be NEGATIVELY AFFECTED

    • @altair9543
      @altair9543 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Then move along.

    • @joan6839
      @joan6839 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      😁😁

  • @kidsphone4090
    @kidsphone4090 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Love your knowledge of this crippling mental disorder. I'm a highly emotional male empathetic. She gave me the silent treatment at home for over a year. I stayed for the grandkids. Silent and no contact for 4 months now. The supply is now the young grandchildren is my assumption.

  • @martinspalding1662
    @martinspalding1662 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    Melanie,
    I was in a narcissistic relationship( 14years). My entities had disappeared. My last resort was divorce. She manipulated the children against me. Saying discussing and untrue statements against me. It took 2years before my little daughter saw her mother b. s.
    My eldest daughter has been brain washed. You cannot co parent with a narcissist. Anything you say, is attacking them and they invert it back to you. They want to provoke you to get a respond then play victim.

    • @mdee860
      @mdee860 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      We are all going thru Narc abuse- I am sorry for your trauma. A word of caution: please do NOT EVER speak about & especially badly about Narc ex-wife to your children. They can not process adult drama. Let them be children. They are smarter than you know, sense everything - & when they are older - they will see thru it all &I've & adore you for Taking the High Road. You're an ADULT - they are not. Discuss adult issues only with adults or a therapist. Not your children! My Dad was an Overt Narc, cheater, never paid child support (8 kids) - because he knew Mom's parents would step in. Total Jerk. Yet Mom never maligned him. Amazing inner strength. It will pay off in the long run. Do not use your children to bounce your problems off of. Good luck, keep learning!

    • @jp5419
      @jp5419 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@mdee860 well, i think there's a difference between maligning someone vs educating a child so they can become aware and protect themselves. Unfortunatly, as codependents, we've brought this disorder and sickness to our children and I think it is our responsibility to get them into therapy and also educate them on healthy boundaries, how to deal with people who don't respect their boundaries, use shaming, guilting, humiliation tactics, etc. to control and manipulate. It all should be done in an age appropriate manner, but I feel this stakes are too high to just pretend to the child all is normal and daddy or mommy is just having a lot of bad days. Children do understand so much, but are still so innocent about human nature. It's the responsiblity of the non narc parent to provide the necessary tools to protect themselves against these soul suckers. This can be done without name calling, etc. Unfortunately, this is their reality (having a narc parent, family member) and if it's not discussed in an age appropriate educational manner, my fear is that they then assimilate these behaviors into their own personality. Kids do whatever they need to in order to survive their circumstances. That's how we got the narc in the first place, no? Melanie, you are helping so many. Thank you for all you do.

    • @mdee860
      @mdee860 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@jp5419 - I think you totally misread or misunderstood my intent. I am ALL for getting children help via therapy. It can be a safe place for them to vent without having to choose sides. Nor did I infer an "all is fine" attitude to kids? What I did say was to never directly undermine the other parent to their children. They see it, they sense it. Again, I'm all for age appropriate boundary teaching as well - just not to use other parent as an example in the lesson. As horrid as Narcs are, it doesn't make a parent who would do that to a child.... much better, IMO.

    • @martinspalding1662
      @martinspalding1662 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@jp5419 I have /still taking my daughter to a therapist. She is been venting all in what has been said to her. The therapist has referred her to do no contact with mother...

  • @lena-Ramone
    @lena-Ramone 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Loads of the narcissist's I've known seem to be agressive to my femininity in a weird way and I concluded they were gay but in the closet .I've got gay friends out of the closet and they are cool. I was messed up about the latest narcissist silent treatment but now I don't care cause I created I meditated and then got right back out there spoke to people they helped loads analysing and we concluded just a loser move on..feel sorry for his hollow detached life. Being okay to be alone is good too and if he's going to trigger abandonment issues In me then theirs plenty of guys out there who won't. Reality check he doesn't care so I'll not care too

  • @janeyd5280
    @janeyd5280 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    But the bad news is I've met another one. We don't have a relationship anymore but maybe the odd walk or fonecall but I always regret it. He is so jealous just like the ex husband .

    • @ismaelescalante1746
      @ismaelescalante1746 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Sorry you're going through that, fix the part of yourself that resonates to those kind of people. I'm on the same journey and I wish you the best ☺️.

  • @AA-lq5pu
    @AA-lq5pu ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Melanie I agree with you on it being a spiritual phenomena. In my experience I definitely felt it was a spiritual thing. I had fallen very ill. I went to get some Reiki Energy healing. Felt my space and aura fill up and my life force increase. Directly after the healing session and as my then husband walked towards me, to my surprize I felt a sudden constriction of my solar plexus and heart chakras as well as my auric field collapsing. The strong contrast which I had never experienced before made it very clear to me that my life force was being drained by him. Before that, I had no idea my ex was effecting me like that. I thought my illness was physical. My abuse took place in the form of neglect, and constantly texting other woman, however he was always very nice towards me when he was with me and when he did eventually arrive home at 1pm. Never invalidated, or critised. Praised me, so I never really felt or could see that I was being abused. When he divorced me I still felt ill and did some Reiki, the next day I felt my nervous system finally letting go and relaxing. Later he would text and I would feel drained and miserable again, then Reiki would fill me up with Prana again. It happended a few times. The cycle of feeling all my chakras collapse basically and then restoring them again. It was so viseral, I could actually feel my life force and prana being restored. Its what restored my faith in the divine. I became so sensitive that I located a chord that was attached to him at the back of my head. Facinating stuff! After years of listening to psychology videos on narcissism it was spiritual distance energy healing that made a huge impact, huge. Crystals and Angels also formed apart of the Reiki healing. Blows my mind! Even months after he left my nervous system was constricted with fluids not flowing properly to my tissues and as I got the Reiki healing I literally felt my system relaxing and all of a sudden tissues being filled up with fluids, I was in awe, it was mind blowing to me that playing a video with a woman holding her hands up and flowing me reiki energy could have such an impact. My theory is that, if we have holes in our energy body created through trauma they can then get a hook in and start to syphon the life force from us. Now I regularly do these spiritual practices to keep my prana and life force levels up. I also make sure I watch videos like this which have been very helpful, since I feel I get the best results from healing when I attack it from the mental, physical and spiritual aspect.

  • @susannedaviau9776
    @susannedaviau9776 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I have seen many videos and read many articles over the past 6 months! This is one of the best! I will watch again and take notes. So powerful information wise and solution wise. I had no clue that I had been living with a narcissist for 31 years until I finally said “enough” and then the narcissist left, went silent and somehow I was lead to you. (Mel). It was you Mel that shined a light on what had been happening in my life and relationship and then provided a real solution to heal and getting my life back. I have been doing NARP & now THRIVER. I think I am finally getting it! Lol 😆 Without this you are very right, we are a small boat out on the ocean with no oars. Thx for sharing very honestly and authenticity about your own life experience and giving thousands of people all around the world this information.

  • @Terraification
    @Terraification 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Oh Bless you for this. Soooo valuable and encouraging. I’ve began to dust off my knees and walk in a straight line since he began his five month long silent treatment. I’m learning what it’s like to function Normally without all the noise and drama. Feeling blessed.

  • @janeyd5280
    @janeyd5280 3 ปีที่แล้ว +24

    I got the silent treatment constantly. Then the attempted strangulation and the broken nose. I went to a lawyer after police advised me to get an interim interdict to put him out the house and keep him out. He didn't see that coming. Lol.

    • @lelawilkerson4299
      @lelawilkerson4299 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      YAY!!!!🤜🤜🤜

    • @godzillamanstreb524
      @godzillamanstreb524 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      ✅ done!

    • @mdee860
      @mdee860 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      @JaneyD - PLEASE keep your guard up. Narcs HATE to lose & esp. to be exposed. Their punishment knows no bounds. Pls. consider getting a true guard dog - not a 'pet.' Don't assume he's done with you, just because you're done with him. The attempted strangulation & broken nose was a warning. Heed it, keep yourself safe at all costs.

    • @lelawilkerson4299
      @lelawilkerson4299 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@mdee860 i DISAGREE. SHE IS DONE WITH HIM LIKE I WAS THE ONE I DATED. MINE BIT MY NOSE IN A NARC RAGE WHEN I HAD PROOF HE WAS CHEATING. WE DO NOT HAVE TO LIVE FOREVR TIED TO SATAN NARCS. BE STRONG, MOVE ON, DONT LOOK BACK, THERE IS NO FUTURE IN UR PAST🤜🤜

    • @mdee860
      @mdee860 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@lelawilkerson4299 - Lela- WTH???? Personally, I have moved on & don't miss him or the relationship one bit. However, when someone has experienced physical abuse, as JaneyD wrote about - never take that lightly. I hope she has moved on successfully,, but safety precautions make sense when someone has shown themselves to be violent. Why you take umbrage at my caring about someone else's trauma & react so strongly is puzzling. Why all CAPS???

  • @justatxmom5790
    @justatxmom5790 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    This damn roller coaster is exhausting!!!

  • @nancyross7812
    @nancyross7812 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I try to always point others as well to you..I see others around me going through this it is heart breaking but there is hope I didn't believe there was hope. . Thank you and lots of love to you as well.

  • @janeyd5280
    @janeyd5280 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    My ex narc is on to his 3rd wife. She stalked him through my marriage and his 2nd marriage and worked her way into his home and tried to get him to marry her for about 20 years. Eventually he gave in, but she had a job so that the only reason he took her on. Me and the 2nd wife both had his babies but the tart already had hers to her ex so they were grown up by the time she went to live with him. So bingo, no kids and extra cash for him to be kept in his luxuries and she was willing to pay. Lol

  • @CS-iv8tk
    @CS-iv8tk 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    Such a immature form of adult time out 🙄

  • @Topseee
    @Topseee ปีที่แล้ว

    You are such a strong lady and it feels like your talking to me directly and I am sure.others would agree with me... I will come.back

  • @natasharichard3900
    @natasharichard3900 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    A living testimony ❤

  • @juliacrane3212
    @juliacrane3212 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I love you Mel! Thank you so much for your courage and strength to win in your life so you can teach us! You are helping me change my family karma!! Fantastic!!

  • @ashleynoelle7429
    @ashleynoelle7429 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

    You know the truth. Thank you for your work!!!

  • @anncrosby6157
    @anncrosby6157 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    The picture of dorien gray is spot on his picture was pure evil but he never changed on the outside that a narc great video the silent treatment was the worse for me ❤️

  • @CL-we6hg
    @CL-we6hg 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    I too was in 3 anti psyco meds and I'm too am going to be 54 yrs old this year and I've been working on my healing journey since 2020 .. o so much has changed and I am really loving myself and I look in the mirror and I like what I see staying back at me ! So so much more I've discovered about myself. .. I love love your voice and videos as you seem so much like my past life that I have moved on from .. thank you !! Peace, Love, Light

  • @stacyruddy6919
    @stacyruddy6919 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Hi Melanie I so blessed I found you. I’m not crazy I hate that I love my narcissist but I need and do love myself if nothing else I’ve had to survive. Thank you but I’m not their yet I’m struggling I’ve let him back in so many times is becoming normal and it’s not normal at all. I’m 62 and games at this age well I’m done. I’ve felt like I didn’t want to take another breath. I’m strong but I’m tired. Grateful for your experiences you can share a way to thrive. ❤️

  • @adammaxwell5851
    @adammaxwell5851 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Aunty Mel, totally relatable...thanks for the enlightenment and validity. Bless your cotton socks 👍

  • @bethlampinski5614
    @bethlampinski5614 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I was blamed and discarded after replying to another woman’s message saying she was his gf. Bc I “involved myself” by replying to her, I was crazy and therefore disposable. I actually thought it was my fault for responding to her… the girl he was cheating with! 🤦🏻‍♀️

  • @ms.bonniebeaver
    @ms.bonniebeaver 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    It's been over a yr!
    From Hawaii

    • @l.ameenaa4669
      @l.ameenaa4669 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      It's a very slow process.
      It's taken me 5.5 - 6 years to get to the stage of : "Stop trying to calm the storm, calm yourself, the storm will pass!" - Dr Angel Storm.

  • @nancyadams4358
    @nancyadams4358 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I have realized finally if I don’t take care of me first and be who I Am instead of hiding in a continually abusive realationship to help them feel in control....

  • @farbionstudios
    @farbionstudios 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Self-worth is important

  • @anneldridge7396
    @anneldridge7396 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    You have made this so clear for me!!

  • @gizempolat4651
    @gizempolat4651 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    You are very inspiring. It was absolutely the right time for me to find this channel☺️

  • @sacredarmony6600
    @sacredarmony6600 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    From Italy here and trying follow you Melania with traslator. tysm for your precious help from my heart ♥. A devastated heart.. doubting i still can feel Love,, cos my heart has been turned into a dry stone. After have been brutally and suddenly discarded from 3 years the Narc stonewalling me, acting like the glorious winner, raw and bossing, having tons of sexual partners but talking as me, using the music i was used to like, and every gestures of me..like totally got all the good away from me and more posting superfiltered pics showing the narc perfect fit and super happy.. and i think i gave this powers to a covert poor victimist Narc to become an Ultra one and i know I cant stop this and i feel guilty for the power i gave. im in no contact from 3 years but i sometimes check its socials cos i feel drained and i see I am spied on so i had to isolate me cos every small thing i could post get stolen sistematically. I do not know how to stop this. everyday I fight to heal me but its an energetic battle as u well said in one of your video. My parents are narcs and my ex husbad was also for 20 years. and now this is my last love trapping me.I wanted die. I know that i will not be able to love myself as a narc does because that kind of love do not resonate in me..im humble and im realistic, i cant turn me in a super model and maybe i do not care.More i aged now and the narc seems being able to renjuvenate! Maybe could you talk about how to help with energies stolen in one of your next video? I tried all the ways, many techniques, medicines,also with deep state of meditation to release me but nothing change really. There is a psychic tie..if i use meditation the same will happens to the narc :/ ty again so much ..you are a beautiful heart and being.

    • @fattinamia
      @fattinamia 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Look up Francesca Pacini, she explains it in Italian

    • @reesedaniel5835
      @reesedaniel5835 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Those "psychic ties" are known as "cords of the wicked"....Ask Jesus Christ to cut them off.
      "Send thine hand from above; rid me, and deliver me out of great waters, from the hand of strange children; Whose mouth speaketh vanity, and their right hand is a right hand of falsehood." Psalm 144:7-8
      "For they do not sleep unless they have done evil; And their sleep is taken away unless they make someone fall." Proverbs 4:16
      "Many a time they have persecuted me from my youth, but they have not prevailed against me. The plowmen (narcs) plowed over my back (slandered, betrayed, disrespected, abused), they made their furrows long (turned everyone against you before you knew what was going on) The LORD is righteous; He has cut me asunder from the cords of the wicked.…" Psalm 129:3-5

    • @sacredarmony6600
      @sacredarmony6600 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@reesedaniel5835 Thank you Reese ♥

    • @MelanieToniaEvans
      @MelanieToniaEvans  3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Hi Sacred Armony, I am so sorry that we dont have Italian translator for my work yet! You are doing great. The most powerful way to heal deeply from the inside out is NARP www.melanietoniaevans.com/narp There truly isnt anything I (and many others know of) that works so effectively. I hope that this helps xoxo

    • @fattinamia
      @fattinamia 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@MelanieToniaEvans if you are looking for one, I would be happy to apply. I've been with NARP for about a year, Italian and have a degree in languages :)

  • @dmanmoto
    @dmanmoto 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

    When they leave you go silent and not tell you where they're going.That's just the power and control thing

  • @letgomyego
    @letgomyego 3 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    Can you please do a video about sharing custody with a narcissist when there is a special needs child involved? My autistic Sun was traumatized from going with his father. I would love to know when dealing with a child who can’t communicate verbally but communicates emotionally, how to protect them? I think this will be a good video although I know it all goes back to the same thing, Healing my inner wounds lol although I love hearing you speak and you make some great points. Thank you so much and we love you and thank you infinitely Melanie 💞💕💖💗😘

    • @inserter400
      @inserter400 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Son or sun ?

    • @fattinamia
      @fattinamia 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      I'd like to hear about this too

    • @jennymowery79
      @jennymowery79 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      My son was traumatized by his ASPD father. He took him from my parents when I was at work he came with the police and my mom let him take him. I never kept him from his son he was not in a good way to have a 2 yr old he didn't even have a job at the time. I didn't know where my son was for 2 wks I had to take him to court to get visitation of my son. When I got him back he was like a different kid he was so traumatized I don't know what he went through he doesn't remember much. His dad didn't even sign his birth certificate he was with the woman that he was triangulating me with. I convinced him to amend it a few months later he wouldn't have been able to take my son if I hadn't had him sign the birth certificate I unwillingly gave him power over my son and myself. My son is 13 now he's been through a lot with his father but he loves him and his father is an ass but he's changed matured alot I've been able to be no contact for the past two years I figure I won't have to see him again til my son's graduation from high school 4 more years of freedom. My son is a wonderful empathetic big hearted young man he sees thru his dad's bs thank God. I wish I knew about ASPD and NPD but I wouldn't have my amazing son his evil father gave me my angel of a son.

    • @letgomyego
      @letgomyego 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@inserter400 I meant Sun Because my son is a shining star 🌟

    • @letgomyego
      @letgomyego 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@jennymowery79 yes My Son is an Angel. Did the courts give you two joint custody? Interesting you said you didn’t have your son for 2 weeks, the same thing happened to me when my ex HID my son from me when I broke up with him and went no contact. I ran to the court so fast, filed for custody and got an order of protection against him. We ended up getting joint custody but my ex got his karma recently when my son would NOT go with his dad and was terrified of him. We called the police and the police said they could not legally force him out the car which is that his dad wanted. He didn’t see his son for almost a year due to his son not wanting to see him. Not my doing. But he got a Good dose of karma on how it feels not to see you child and I didn’t even force my son to not see him, he was traumatized from his father as well. I’m learning to trust the universe and let go of traumas and live my truth so I can have peace! He finally got to see his dad which triggered me but I know I’m done letting the psychic vampire narcissist steal my energy, we have to let go of the hurt and pain and feel divine love again! Blessings

  • @virtualluxury7784
    @virtualluxury7784 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thank you so so so so much! I needed to hear this. My journey to be set free starts now!

  • @toniacompton255
    @toniacompton255 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    That man, my ex owes me $500.00.
    But I’m not worried about it, Gods in control.

  • @ms.bonniebeaver
    @ms.bonniebeaver 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    Why I can't move on. Why am I stuck.. and he is so happy

    • @skymeadow7762
      @skymeadow7762 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      When we get our self esteem up, we will leave, it's so heartbreaking

    • @kimberlykong60212
      @kimberlykong60212 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      In all honesty, they will never be happy. That’s only a mask to make them seem like they’re normal. In reality, they repeat the same cycle of emotional abuse and triangulation with their current partners too.
      Trust me, you’ll eventually find inner peace and happiness once you take this time to build yourself.

    • @jessicamarks5577
      @jessicamarks5577 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      There happiness is false just like there false sense of self . It's all for show .

    • @MelanieToniaEvans
      @MelanieToniaEvans  3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      I'd love you to come into my free webinar at www.melanietoniaevans.com/freewebinar to find out exactly why. It will give you much clarity and hope xoxo

    • @rolandbecky2000
      @rolandbecky2000 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      All thanks to Dr Olu, who brought back my ex lover from another woman, after breaking up with me 2 years ago. and now with the help of Dr Olu. my husband is back.

  • @deborahwentworth8792
    @deborahwentworth8792 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    I am healing and the one thing that's helped me is this :Remembering he is out of my life I have no reason to seek vengeance ,let him go use other people cause it will no longer be me in any way shape or form.Get into the mindset, your life is worth more than allowing thoughts of the narc infiltrate and take up space in my head.Start living your life getting to know the real You and live to be true to You forr me ,I believe it is my Faith in God and knowing He can conquor all things even in our darkest moments.He wants to help us so we can grow and our Faith can grow in Him and stop putting our Faith in mere humans.We should come to the mindset that never put that much trust or faith in ANY human so that it impacts us to that extent

  • @jennalainemasterson7354
    @jennalainemasterson7354 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    I’d be surprised if you remember. We spoke one time. It was so powerful. You had some way of sensing the negativity around me and my pain. I was I Philadelphia then. 4 cities later I am not completely where I want to be but I am, after many YEARs , I believe and know I will be back to myself. He contacted me not to long ago. I laughed. I texted back, you must be so hard up to be in touch with me! But if you’ll do an interview on narcissism on you tube, I’ll set it up! He said no… surprised. Thank you for helping me want to be myself again.

  • @Jillian60
    @Jillian60 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    Everything you speak about, my narcissists use these tactics. and I never understood why they do this. Until I found out their tactics fall under narcissistic traits...narcissists are sadistic...

    • @reesedaniel5835
      @reesedaniel5835 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Envy is the root of all of it, however. Malicious envy. They know they are "different".......See Psalm 58:3-5 for more info on that.

  • @MaileyMcAslan
    @MaileyMcAslan 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    29:26 over and over
    “... regardless of wth anybody else is doing.”
    YESSSSSSSSSSSS!!! 🎉🥳👏🍻

  • @dianeneel3294
    @dianeneel3294 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    So true of your words using the grooming. This time I am refocusing for recover! No contact for good! Thank you!!

  • @stacysmith2770
    @stacysmith2770 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    My ex narcissist bf went silent then started a relationship with a lady 2 blocks from me. Would never sell my house but it's been very very very hard to see this in front of me.

  • @FindYourFree
    @FindYourFree 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    8 months no contact..i know i saved my life leaving him

  • @jenniferbruns2432
    @jenniferbruns2432 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Thank You Thank You! I have been following you and using your advice and tools. It has helped greatly. I plan on doing narp when my financial situation gets better.

  • @esimic
    @esimic 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    How is this so spot on 😭

  • @karenlenk1724
    @karenlenk1724 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    Excellent point re healing energetic cords...cannot be cut/removed until the wound they're attached to are healed.

  • @kellyhummingbird
    @kellyhummingbird 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    the earlier you are recognizing when you are in the web... the wiser you are becoming

  • @nancyross7812
    @nancyross7812 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    Iam so thankful God has given you the knowledge to pass along and help others. You have helped me and my. youngest daughter . Learning to break generational curses of being with men who abused in everyway.. I can't believe how my healing is going so fast and my body was so broken I was dying. last year . Now Iam thriving and my daughter as well . It is so worth it . Breaking free has been so amazing blessings. Thank you and thank God he has given you. Strength love knowledge to help others.

  • @JamesJohnsoneAndersonBoyleReid
    @JamesJohnsoneAndersonBoyleReid 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    Yes that's excactly the way she made me feel the first couple of times she Just dissapeared for no reason and I was totally confused ,I now understand her illness and I'm now back together with myself and as you say they go crazy when you ask them to explain ,, everything makes sense and they are very sick and evil people ✨❣️

  • @askinhulya
    @askinhulya 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    your info is one of most on point and deep take on the whole dynamics of this kind of relationships and ppl with this personality disorder. Thank you for sharing your wisdom !!

  • @christinehenry305
    @christinehenry305 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thank you for sharing all of your wisdom and knowledge. It was much appreciated!

  • @l.ameenaa4669
    @l.ameenaa4669 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    We love you Mel ! 🏵️
    Stay safe, healthy and happy !🇦🇺

  • @blackangellucyfire
    @blackangellucyfire 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    It's like you've met my ex and spend several months with him alone on a mountain top. You know him.

  • @esimic
    @esimic 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank you Melanie I blocked him today on all devices and social media accounts after watching your videos and receiving the silent treatment. He is grooming a new supply as you say.

  • @daniellekeith8961
    @daniellekeith8961 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    You just answered my question lord 🙏 I know if I keep trying I will be able to grow

  • @gunnagogoona
    @gunnagogoona 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    OMFG I wish your video came across my path before sitting up here for 10months!
    I've had to keep watching this on repeat!
    I keep getting triggered into my own ongoing family court and missing the rest 🙄🤦🏾
    Parenting matter started may 2019 18months after seperation., final orders for shared custody Sept 2020. stonewalled contact and ghosting since seperation. No co parenting, contraventions of withholding. All with a smile and intense pretending I don't exist.
    I've watched so many American videos and frustrating information aus family law videos..
    But none of this!! The real life of it.
    Thank you so 💓 much
    Right from home and close to my heart

  • @lyllies1130
    @lyllies1130 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank you my soul needed to hear this and God used you immensely to bless my life.

  • @kathrynkenyon785
    @kathrynkenyon785 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Love your car analogies. I've always seen cars and humans as working the same way. When I do NARP I sometimes feel some deep feelings but mostly I feel nothing. I do the work with Faith...I just do it KNOWING that the work is being done and complete. I believe in quantum physics so it's natural to believe it will work in healing our past, our parallel lives, down to the cellular level. 😉💖

  • @zoekaraviotis966
    @zoekaraviotis966 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Really lovely to hear the spiritual aspects as well.

  • @btlfilmmedia9514
    @btlfilmmedia9514 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    walk away and close the door even if you have children or they will use you and the children...
    There is no decent way out but t leave .Those who don’t get that have never experienced these types of people .Leave an option for contact when your children are old enough to see you independently ...

  • @jennymac1116
    @jennymac1116 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Melanie- Does Module #9 really help with breaking soul ties or contracts, trauma bonds and psychic chords with toxic narcissistic strangers? That’s what I’m focusing on to aid that part of the process. Thanks for letting me know.

  • @adrotaderp1
    @adrotaderp1 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Your emotional passion and that you said you truly experienced the pain and struggle is why I subscribed....thankyou for helping through great communication and knowledge

  • @yvangranda3652
    @yvangranda3652 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank you for this amazing video , it is describing the exact pattern I've seen over 2 years, now it's time to break this loop :(

  • @intp9944
    @intp9944 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    thank you so muuuuuuch i am now changing the war

  • @TWTIII
    @TWTIII 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    I really needed this validation. Thank you SO MUCH.

  • @ms.bonniebeaver
    @ms.bonniebeaver 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I have follow you this entire time.. so greatful..
    I'm just still so low..
    And alone

    • @alanalambert1178
      @alanalambert1178 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Things will get better it's a matter of time. You need to find your passion in life and focusing on your dreams. I have been narc free for a 1yr and 6mths. It's been a struggle but I can say I am healed. I have just focused on my life and learning about manipulative people and learning to love yourself is the greatest gift. The pain does get better I promise just keep the faith focus and love yourself I wish you the very best

    • @taniaspence4879
      @taniaspence4879 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Never alone my friend, always angels by our side ✨❤️✨

  • @glowflower1
    @glowflower1 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    You are a beautiful speaker.

  • @helenlesleysmith7559
    @helenlesleysmith7559 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I bought a house out of my money & put it in his name he has abandoned it disappeared into thin air not even the lawyers cant contact him. Looks like im going to loose my house & money!

  • @gregphillips6434
    @gregphillips6434 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    This is a great video. Thanks for sharing 👍

  • @seeing1111
    @seeing1111 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I get all most situations a narcissist pulls off and I'm tired of it. I death with it better she just will not stop or look inward or if does it's attack