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The Ultimate Insult To A Narcissist

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 9 ส.ค. 2022
  • After everything the narcissist has done to you wouldn't it be nice to get a little bit back one day?
    I'm not talking about doing something cruel or vindictive like them, but I am talking about solid ways to stand in your power that bring them TOTALLY undone.
    In this episode of Thriver TV, I am going to share the ultimate insult to a narcissist and how you can overcome them when they try to smear you, during property settlements, while co-parenting, or any other situation where they would typically derail you.
    After watching this episode, please let me know if you found it helpful. I love reading your comments!
    💖 The Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Program:
    melanietoniaev...
    🤗 Recover, Heal and Thrive - Free 2-part Masterclass:
    www.recoverhea...
    📘 Order your copy of my book- You Can Thrive After Narcissistic Abuse:
    👀 Read hundreds of free articles on my blog:
    blog.melanieto...
    💛 Connect with the Thriver Community:
    / quantafreedomhealing
    / ​​
    pinterest.com....
    #Narcissisticabuse #MelToniaEvans

ความคิดเห็น • 91

  • @MelanieToniaEvans
    @MelanieToniaEvans  2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    Go free from the narcissist for good! The Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Program: courses.melanietoniaevans.com/p/narp 🦋

    • @donnaolivas9695
      @donnaolivas9695 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Yes, Yes ,Yes. Melanie, you are amazing. I couldn't see myself free. You helped me free from a 29 year narcissistic marriage. Two years narcissist free now. Couldn't have done it without you. It's never too late. Thank you so much. Lots of Love 😊 ❤

    • @amormagisterestoptimus
      @amormagisterestoptimus 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      🥺⚓

  • @kayalfasi2991
    @kayalfasi2991 2 ปีที่แล้ว +24

    " I have evolved beyond you "
    ...that's it in a nutshell , well said 👏

    • @willsolo1967
      @willsolo1967 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Pretty much anyone is better than a narcissist

  • @estefaniacastillo133
    @estefaniacastillo133 2 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    He blocked my blessing so much..As soon as I implied my boundarys. He give me the silent treatment. I told him to collect his stuff from my home and leave that evening. Within less then 24 hours opportunitys and good work came my way. Less then 4 hours of him collecting his belongings he was posting online photos of him in a bar with his new supply kissing her in the videos. (No trigger from me. And no response to him clearly trying to get a reaction from me.
    I knew I'd made the right decision. Once I see the first red flag now I address it.

    • @shandlejenkins6074
      @shandlejenkins6074 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Same here, less than 24 hours. Posting but I already knew she was lurking I the background. They are sick.

    • @estefaniacastillo133
      @estefaniacastillo133 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@shandlejenkins6074 They always have a backup plan. Give her 3 months she will be discarded for the next one. I was only with him 4 months but within that time scale I could not understand why i could never seem to get on my feet emotionally or financially. Every week he left me and my child short with money and food as he would over spend over eat and over everything that the last few days of the week I was with out food or money until I got paid again. Yet he had the cheek to say I am selfish and I do nothing for him. Even tho I was cooking him soup when he was kill doing all his ironing and washing he was given me no money and would go to bed given me the silent treatment facing the wall. Of I kept ignoring the signs I was for sure setting myself up for misery. Address it and don't look back I say.

  • @rimbakei5492
    @rimbakei5492 2 ปีที่แล้ว +19

    "Separate from darkness and become the light."
    "You being you regardless"
    thank you so much.

  • @m4ckt4yl0r
    @m4ckt4yl0r 2 ปีที่แล้ว +24

    I'm a very anxious person and when my ex would start something with me I would usually start to shut down. My throat would physically close. You can imagine how that reaction made him react. He would just go on and on and on until I eventually said something. Very glad he is now in my past! Appreciate you very much for helping me through a difficult time ♡

  • @willsolo1967
    @willsolo1967 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    Being impassive and indifferent towards the narcissist is best

  • @izackschnoor1003
    @izackschnoor1003 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    This works. Like really works. My roommate is pissed at me for knowing who I am and what I stand for. He threatened to kick me out to which I calmly made plans and moved out. Now he texts me begging me to come back and that he needs my help. I said no to both and also, that I don't have to worry about his problems anymore.

  • @ytan5617
    @ytan5617 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Basically just treat them dead non existent. Thank you for sharing

  • @MJ-qb5ph
    @MJ-qb5ph 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    I can no longer go down to your level - that’s my take on narcs now

  • @reneespicy1
    @reneespicy1 2 ปีที่แล้ว +20

    I love this! I needed this today, I was feeling very down and stressed about everything that the ex narcissist has been and still is trying to put me through. This video confirms that I am doing the right thing by maintaining no contact. Thank you!

  • @carolb3869
    @carolb3869 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Let them think what they want about you - who cares what THEY think!!!!
    Cut the cord
    Move along
    Focus on yourself
    Once you have ‘evolved beyond them’, they can do NO harm.
    A freeing gift to yourself 💙

  • @tiaturnbullchampionscoachi9587
    @tiaturnbullchampionscoachi9587 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    You have gotten SO POWERFUL!
    This is the only answer that actually works! Thank you! Brilliant!!! SO SO POWERFUL!!!!! ❤ 😍 💖 ❣ 💕 💘 ❤ 😍 💖 ❣

  • @philpowell1162
    @philpowell1162 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I told the ex to piss off and exposed her then i ignored her. She eventually gave up !!

  • @elainesmith5313
    @elainesmith5313 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Loved your video!! Absolute NO CONTACT is the Best Defense. My Narc X Mother in law is 90 yrs old. Was married to her son for 45 yrs. He died in Jan 2022. She gave me several months and then started her demanding of money.... Called me ugly names ECT.
    But truthly she's been doing this behind my back for years anyway. Corwersing money from my husband for years.
    I dropped kicked her skinny --- out of my house and told her not to come back. Next step would be civil court for trespassing. NO CONTACT since June. Have enjoyed the quiet!!! Oh I did receive one hate letter....projection written all over it!!! A very very SICK OLD WOMAN.
    SHE THOUGHT SHE WAS GOING TO BULLY ME LIKE SHE. DID MY HUSBAND.
    WANT TO ASK HER HOW ALL THIS HAD WORKED OUT FOR HER????? THANK AGAIN......GREAT SUGGESTIONS...KEEP THEM COMING!!!

  • @amy-mw4gp
    @amy-mw4gp 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    I don't think my friend is a full blown narc but she shows quite a few patterns of that behaviour. She has this ability to make me feel invisible, invalidate and totally ignored with what feels like random bouts of silent treatment. They can go on for weeks or months, the truth is I never know how long, then it seems to end when she decides it does and will just suddenly come over and begin speaking to me after 2 months of total silence. She always looks at what you can do for her; never what she can do for you. She always makes excuses though, even though I could use the same but don't. Something just feels so "off" about her all the time. Yet her other friends don't seem to see it. It feels very lonely and isolating. Her life is very secret. She just speaks about the same topics over and over, usually ones that paint her as a victim or a hero.

    • @ta_nimal2023
      @ta_nimal2023 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      When she disappears grab your chance and exit. You may even need to face some loneliness until you find new friends if the group proves challenging (if they/she turn on you for getting a healthier distance from her.

    • @amy-mw4gp
      @amy-mw4gp ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@ta_nimal2023 Mission achieved. I caught her out in questionable behaviour, she lied, gaslighted me and gave me the "sorry you feel that way" gem. I left. Feeling the hit of the Trauma Bond now though, but I'll just push through it. Thanks for replying to me.

  • @nancyadams4358
    @nancyadams4358 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    Yes they do go away😃

  • @vickid325
    @vickid325 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    The timing of your video in my inbox was like someone was looking out for us. I wanted to react to what has been happening and it's been awful by sitting on our hands and not saying a word but keeping our head held high. Not reacting goes against everything I thought I should do but know that is what they want. Thank you for your very clear message and it helped immensely. ❤

  • @wanderer0617
    @wanderer0617 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    I was doing a lot better since the last time I saw him after he destroyed me for the last time in 2016.
    I blocked him on Facebook and texting. I left the email door open and he sent me a yearly happy birthday. I took a month to see if I am stronger to read it.
    It was how I changed his life, the best thing that ever happened to him. His best memories on his boat were with me. "I never stopped loving you."
    I felt flattered in the beginning but realized, wait a minute. There were a few beautiful experiences on his boat but there were many more times he verbally thrashed me, threw things at me. There was no accountability or apology, only that he mostly quit drinking and I made him a kinder better man.
    He left me broken and broke, shaken. His email was all about how great his life was, I taught him adventure as I was brought to my knees.
    I engaged, I know I shouldn't have, but I let him know it wasn't all he said, that there was manipulation and abuse, too. The biggest soul journey of my life to go through that and now know the signs to never get destroyed again. I told him I know my love was real. Ugh.
    I will watch this again. I slipped over the last 2 weeks.
    He'll ghost me again until my next birthday. Too painful. Full block time, sigh.
    Thank you Melanie, I found you in 2016 when I was literally in pieces on the floor when I had to end it. 💙

  • @janthepooh
    @janthepooh 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I am afraid I’m in the midst of dealing with the narcissist. We have broken up but currently he is staying with me due to my health as well as he was having difficulty finding housing. I have no other option currently to be at his mercy. I am working on getting strong enough to be on my own. I feel so helpless. You are right about his triggering me. He does lie and steal from me. According to him I think everything is about me. How do I, being in a weakened physical and isolated state completely break free? I’m currently widening my circle of people. I have been putting a stop to my reactions to him. I just feel so broken however. Will continue to work on this.

    • @beautifulawareness1707
      @beautifulawareness1707 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      There's hope. I don't know your situation but please contact (secretly) the women shelter. If you've got pets and you're in USA they'll help you with that and to plan and leave also if you've got children . I know it's easier said than done but better to take this huge step than staying with him and if you're already physically ill he'll make your condition even worse . He'll suck your soul .Please think about it. Now it seems impossible but it isn't.
      Hugs and love to you 💓

  • @clancyb747
    @clancyb747 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    I am going through this with my Mother
    It's hell as she does it in a repeat pattern over & over.
    Comes back then after a few mths wants to leave again & again. Always on time

    • @clancyb747
      @clancyb747 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Thank you for your support 🙏🏼

  • @dragonmom495
    @dragonmom495 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Holy buckets....needed this today. Thank you

  • @christianvachon2235
    @christianvachon2235 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Great video! Thank you! Cheers!

  • @Boogie76600
    @Boogie76600 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Thank you, Melanie, very informative.

  • @cutebutton8468
    @cutebutton8468 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Such great advice, thank you! I'm trying really hard to apply everything, since my whole family is a big narc viper nest 😂 🤞

  • @RobNiser
    @RobNiser 14 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Walk away , don't talk and not look back never again . Is the best working you can do , 100% succes.

  • @kathleengalek4441
    @kathleengalek4441 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Evolving beyond them is their biggest fear! ❤❤❤

  • @reginafarias
    @reginafarias 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    I am devastated. My loving and precious kid became a narc exactly like you are describing. Giving up of him is like giving up my own life.

    • @mariannejackson8954
      @mariannejackson8954 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Both of my sons are narcissistic. My deceased husband had planned on getting a job way out of state, and abandoning all of us. He ended up with a brain tumor and major heart condition diagnosis, the month he was leaving for a new job.
      I care for my youngest son and it is really hard, with mental health issues as well.

    • @reginafarias
      @reginafarias 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@mariannejackson8954 How can we care for someone who is always hurting us?

    • @mariannejackson8954
      @mariannejackson8954 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@reginafarias My son has a therapist who is working with him and I take small breaks in the garden, play the piano, and sing.

  • @emelda.melaniebloemstein2346
    @emelda.melaniebloemstein2346 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Hi Melanie so true you are powerful my siblings do all this horrible things to me I just go ina coner and keep quiet 😢 😭 but thanks for your inspiring words and help may God continue to bless you abundantly

  • @mmady01
    @mmady01 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    WOW! Thank you! 😊 You’ve just hit the nail with the hammer again. This is truly helpful to me right now. 💖

  • @tracigodfrey4965
    @tracigodfrey4965 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    You are a GEM! Thank You!

  • @ThesySurface
    @ThesySurface ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Anti- fear!! 🙌

  • @missmelissa1348
    @missmelissa1348 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    ANOTHER HOME RUN!!
    💞 🦋 THANKS MEL! 🦋 💞

  • @peterknyk1942
    @peterknyk1942 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Thanks again for sharing your wisdom! ❤️🦋❤️

  • @paulaharris4667
    @paulaharris4667 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Respect!

  • @RickBeligni
    @RickBeligni 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    This describes my family member perfectly. Your videos help me.

    • @MJ-qb5ph
      @MJ-qb5ph 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Describes my entire family!

  • @Mysticus11
    @Mysticus11 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Brilliantly articulated 💫 Needed this big time! I feel richer now the penny has dropped! ☮️

  • @mondolilith7917
    @mondolilith7917 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I’m going to start sharing your videos with my child. A head start with this topic is essential these days.

    • @willsolo1967
      @willsolo1967 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Alwaws Guard against all narcissists

  • @josephhuth3714
    @josephhuth3714 ปีที่แล้ว

    Brilliant and eloquent. Melania is an angel of light.

  • @dtdt8634
    @dtdt8634 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    As always incredibly good advice! Though it’s quite a different matter putting in in to practice when up against these people when there constantly finding ways to trigger! And up to now I’ve always fallen for there bait. I will have to pucker down and dig deeper to try and ignore the taunts 😬

  • @ziontatad1554
    @ziontatad1554 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I am so sad. My 3 year old grand daughter’s Nanny is a Narcissist and my daughter and son-in-law are clueless
    They cannot see this jealous and envious fake person

  • @belindametz5130
    @belindametz5130 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    So good to see you again !!!!

  • @patriciabenavente5124
    @patriciabenavente5124 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Thank you so much! It's so encouraging and we can so easily relate. Thank you for your excellence, integrity, hard work, seriousness, compassion, and high spiritual, mental and emotional IQ. Lots of love and respect! :)

  • @kristenyergin3397
    @kristenyergin3397 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I tried to walk away peacefully and my husband killed my pony. I wasn't able to financially take my horse with me. Financial abuse is terrible! Narcissistic abuse is heart wrenching. The fact that the narcissist can do these things with no consequence is unbearable.

  • @stephanhampel9940
    @stephanhampel9940 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    thank you for your work and sharing it, Melanie!!!!!!

  • @namehcvl4884
    @namehcvl4884 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

    This was excellent Melanie thank you ❤

  • @wilmasmits6041
    @wilmasmits6041 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    😘💖 thank you

  • @faye9973
    @faye9973 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Love ❤️

  • @earthbeing3627
    @earthbeing3627 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank you, Melanie, very on point. NARP is an excellent program.

  • @gojiberry7201
    @gojiberry7201 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I once heard that the ultimate insult to a narcissist is death ... like "I won't exist." (No, I'm not advocating murder haha) But like tyrants and some politicians don't seem to be able to accept that they are not immortal (i.e., God). I do agree with you ... if everyone ignored narcissists they would be in a sorry state

    • @AZDC99
      @AZDC99 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Operation Ignore FOR LIFE is in effect for me now. 3 months into it

  • @rockpilesled
    @rockpilesled 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I love MTE

  • @DJ-fh7xn
    @DJ-fh7xn ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Excellent

  • @atolikinimi3153
    @atolikinimi3153 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    It is eye opening, it is healing and empowering. Thanks!

  • @tamarbatyah7
    @tamarbatyah7 ปีที่แล้ว

    Living my Truth! 🙌🕊️💜

  • @mikew8622
    @mikew8622 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    So wild to listen to this

  • @shamusosullivan5650
    @shamusosullivan5650 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    ☝🏼

  • @willsolo1967
    @willsolo1967 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Parasitical beings

    • @beautifulawareness1707
      @beautifulawareness1707 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Sad but this is what they are. Believe me or not I kind of feel sorry for them cause they'll never deal with their shadow and childhood wounds . Which means never finding a way to see the light and freedom..

  • @angelaknox
    @angelaknox ปีที่แล้ว

    My nex is trying so hard to trigger me into responding right now. I know is just a tactic, I'm going to stay strong. I'm finally done!!

    • @AZDC99
      @AZDC99 ปีที่แล้ว

      The bonus points for you (that you weren't initially shooting for) is seeing THE STEAM OF FRUSTRATION inadvertently screaming like a kettle pot out of their ears after THEY FAIL to trigger you, once again

  • @to_hakopian
    @to_hakopian 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I was married to a narcissist for 27 years...he constantly called me crazy and lied and cheated on me... I've been trying to get a divorce from him for the last 4.5 years but it's like he's got his claws in me and not letting me go so I can have peace... 😪😪

    • @beautifulawareness1707
      @beautifulawareness1707 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Don't worry. One day you'll get out of this toxic bubble.
      Hugs ❤️

    • @rachaeldjordjevic5415
      @rachaeldjordjevic5415 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Plz just leave. It's a life or death situation.💙

    • @to_hakopian
      @to_hakopian ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@rachaeldjordjevic5415 I did leave finally, but he dragged the divorce out too... it became so costly in every way after 5 years... I'm seeing the light at the tunnel now that after 5 plus years the divorce should be finalized soon...

    • @darlenepaolo3509
      @darlenepaolo3509 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      ​@to_hakopian ❤you are an inspiration. 40yrs. with my narc. Time for me to get out or die trying

  • @saurabhraj8477
    @saurabhraj8477 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    just shrink them, and do not care...

  • @camarorules1
    @camarorules1 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I was so trapped in this with my daughter using my love for my grandkids to cruelly torture me. 😩🥲