“To constantly feel like you have something to repent for or have to ask for forgiveness. Your own existance is sinful” Broski got me sobbing right now
for a latino church, they decieve white looking females to bait, confuse, force bribe, manipulate destroy any hope they have especially if they like someone of the same skin color (paleness) the frenemies target the weakness of the white looking female (of foreign decent) south american Europeans of ancestry and sabotage the other with so much misery to the point of self destruction and complete isolation, white the female is obligated by their frenemies friends to do the spokesmen says, a manipulational force to observe the weakness of the low self esteem female to give up her personal freedom, and wind up with a decent of dis interest, yet giving the circumstances its for the money, and a false indoctrination by enemy pastors that led astray the other, because of the tabs, information that we, the weak,the norm, people give them, the operation of complete mirage of crafty operations to destroy our destiny, and yet they know, after a few months, they want others to forget about what they do behind it all, the operation to tell others (those who destroyed you in church)ahead of an uprising timing for those who were led astray
I understand that frustration if you don't have a relationship with God. Like how can you live and care for someone you don't know and that seems like someone that is always mad. However I challenge that notion with actually getting to know God and his true charcter. God loves and adores us so much. To want to be better and ask for forgiveness is like being in a loving relationship where you hurt the other person and say you are sorry and are trying to be better. I don't think that is bad at all. You can't love someone you don't know but that love God has and always had foer you is there and is always available. You don't have to be perfect but you do have to ask and keep your heart open. Love can't get in with your walls completely up but luckily God works around that wall even is we bring it down an inch.
I was raised in the Catholic faith and original sin is a concept they have where you’re born with the sin of Adam and Eve. To me this sends the message that you’re born sinful and wrong
I hope everybody took some time to recover from the trauma, if recovery is still ongoing, keep pushing !! Do what you can with what you have (easier said than done I know)
Everytime I hear "I envy the faithful" I burst into tears. I do. I used to have that blissful ignorance. I used to have the closeness and shared beliefs with my family. But after the age of 12 that all started changing, and now, at 22, it's completely gone, and it IS incredibly isolating. Brittany makes me feel less alone.
Ive heard people changing their mind about religion at 12 yeara old SO MANY TIMES I dont think it means anything, but its so curious to me. I stopped believeing in God altogether at 12, and a couple of friends had the same experience, a few strangers too. Makes me think: whats going on at 12 thar made us break?
Girl same, I’m almost 23 in a couple weeks which is making me spiral about a lot of things. Including struggling with my faith and if I should get back into it or not
@@pepperpattynaise I think it's cause of puberty ngl. Religion tends to be weird when it comes to "losing your innocence" through your body and your desires Naturally developing. I think we break away as a literal survival tactic cause it's fuckin painful to hate yourself for your body, mind, desires and urges that aren't hurting anybody. For me? I realized I was bi at 12 and I realized that at least in this part of my life, it's either I choose to try and understand my newfound attraction to other boys or I hate myself for life. 12 is truly when you start seeing how you don't fit in that system anymore. And I hate that I feel guilty about it today at 19 years old
wow same for me i was twelve and now I’m 21 and I have given up on re-believing. I think I have stopped trying because I know it’s not meant for me and I am no longer ashamed of it. It is isolating at first but in a way it is liberating also
I felt so much meaning behind the statement “I forgave God”. I haven’t resonated with a sentence like this since “I toowk it to my penthouse and I fweaked it”
"i can't explain basic human empathy to you" !!! girl you found the words to explain how so many of us feel after leaving the church. UGH THANK U FOR THIS EPISODE ILY
There's a good quote out there from author Lauren Morrill, when talking about affordable healthcare in the US, which says "I don't know how to explain to you why you should care about other people."
god i felt this SO HARD. my fam always finds these little digs, ways to press my buttons, but i never do that back for the fear of creating a giant argument. just not worth it to me.
@@GivebackthescarfI’d genuinely like to have an honest convo with you. Your perspective fascinates me. My parents are/were Christians but I could never say they were religious. I developed a relationship with God when I was 11 from the Bible Study at my school. And everything I did then for 6 years was for my personal relationship with God. However, the older I got, and the more I read the Bible, I realised it wasn’t for me. I didn’t want to pick and choose parts of the Bible that worked with my morals and beliefs and ignore the rest. Besides, does it not say God doesn’t want a lukewarm believer, or the whole “if you don’t forsake your mother and father for the cross, you can’t follow Jesus.” I feel scriptures like those clearly indicate the Lord wants a FULL believer and I can never be that. So I respect it but it’s not for me. I do have days where I hear a beautiful worship song and wonder maybe I can be Christian again, but I’m very convinced it will lead me back here where I am, aware that the path is narrow.
I'm a Christian, and this was so well said and so respectful. I went through a lot of the same trauma that you talked about here and I understand being angry and having to unlearn and being estranged from your family. You didn't have to be respectful when talking about your hurt, but you were and that's why I love you. Thank you for who you are.
i wholeheartedly agree. i was born into a christian missionary family and was “saved” at four years old (??) and i fell away from God from age 16-30 and it was ONLY through love that i returned. that was four years ago and my faith is now stronger than it’s ever been. i resonated with so much if not all of what she said about her experience with religious trauma especially as it relates to family and cried along with her. brittany broski you are a damn treasure, girl.
You know youve hit a new low when you stalk someone to find their costplayer crush. They literally follow eachother, and she has liked his photos since september. He also has a twitter and patreon with 18+ content. I had to
I came here from a tik tok, it was a clip from this episode of you talking about your strained relationship with your religious family. So, when you began this episode with "I've got so much on my heart, I've got to put these words to camera", the LAST thing I was expecting was a story about a Ghost cosplayer going hog out on Twitter.
this was my FIRST episode of Broski Report, from a clip compilation including bits from the back half of this episode, about religion. So yeah same experience, she went "I have so much on my heart" and I went "oh wow she's serious" then she hit me with the "I have a favorite Call of Duty cosplayer" and I said "Now where is this going?"
her talking about her experience in the church and her struggles communicating with her family made me tear up. when you peel back the layers of goofy humour, brittany is so intelligent and kind and empathetic and i appreciate her content endlessly
for a latino church, they decieve white looking females to bait, confuse, force bribe, manipulate destroy any hope they have especially if they like someone of the same skin color (paleness) the frenemies target the weakness of the white looking female (of foreign decent) south american Europeans of ancestry and sabotage the other with so much misery to the point of self destruction and complete isolation, white the female is obligated by their frenemies friends to do the spokesmen says, a manipulational force to observe the weakness of the low self esteem female to give up her personal freedom, and wind up with a decent of dis interest, yet giving the circumstances its for the money, and a false indoctrination by enemy pastors that led astray the other, because of the tabs, information that we, the weak,the norm, people give them, the operation of complete mirage of crafty operations to destroy our destiny, and yet they know, after a few months, they want others to forget about what they do behind it all, the operation to tell others (those who destroyed you in church)ahead of an uprising timing for those who were led astray
Brittany is so eloquent, man. The way she can make my side hurt from laughing one second and then have me BAWLING the next is actually a mystery to me. She’s better than like 99% of podcasters or talk show hosts
@@Eiji_Kirishima next time, when a family member ask you "why you do not want to return to church and us?", answer them this: "I cannot, because how can I trust people so ARROGANT to the point of claiming 'I know what god think'?"
@@Jamhael1makes sense but remember you can’t hate God because of a misrepresentation other people give of him. Mankind is not the author of our faith so bad behavior has nothing to do with the truth of Christianity .
“That was stripped of me, at my own hands” this ex-Mormon over here is SOBBING. Thank you for including such vulnerable and wise insights about your own experience. So much love.
Fellow ex Mormon here! You should listen to the song Untitled by Rachael Jenkins she is also ex Mormon and that’s one of her songs about ✨religious trauma✨
Same here. Dad was bishop and I was forced to come out when I was 17. Bullied at church and school. Dad does not talk to me and I always blame myself for hurting my family by being gay and go back and forth from hating and trying to love myself.
@@micahhowald8448 Also a (current however progressive) mormon. Coming out to mormon parents is the hardest thing I've ever done and they absolutely did not accept any part of me that identifies as queer. It's hard learning to love the parts of you that the church condemns as a sin. We can't blame ourselves for for being queer and our families being hurt by that.
All jokes aside, I’ve never really felt like I had religious trauma until now. “It feels like they chose god over you” has me me crying like a little baby rn. That hit so deep.
I feel you that line hit so deep. I was raised JW and one of their teachings is that you should always choose Jehovah over anyone else even yourself and it still really fucks with my mind whenever I think about it 😢
@@spitdealer2668 yes! It’s such a toxic mindset when you realize everyone we should be putting first is here on Earth, in the flesh. I love Brit sm for opening her platform so we can have these discussions and find comfort in knowing we’re not alone. I hope you’re able to heal past everything, friend
It sucks because as a kid I would always have the thought in the back of my mind that the people I love that didn’t love Jesus were going to hell. Fucked me up.
And when I figured out I was attracted to girls too all I could think about was the fact that now maybe I’m going to go to hell and my parents never denied that
I still remember when I was a kid, a little girl was standing next to me by the alter and she said “they like it when you raise your hands” and we both raised our hands together and my parents came and hugged me
as a lesbian who went to a christian church growing up, even though my parents weren’t very religious, just simply BEING in the church, feeling that horrible sensation like you don’t belong, like you’ve done something terribly wrong that you just can’t help, it’s horrible. The church never felt like a place of love to me, and i always wish it did. It always made me feel like a monster, like i didn’t belong at all. that hurts a lot
im also a lesbian and i felt the same way when i would talk to my friends at church and they would say stuff like "if you ever said you were gay i would leave you because its against my religion" and i couldn't believe she left me when i came out to her after being so close for like three years because she cared more about her religion then our friendship and it makes me feel guilty as well just for being who i am
@@dentchii2947 exactly!! first of all I’m so sorry that happened to you, but it happens unfortunately so often. People have treated me differently or left me for just the way I love and their opinions on it. it makes you feel like you have to keep such a natural part of yourself hidden :(
This made me cry. I am so grateful to my mom for pulling our family out of the church when my sister and I were young, despite her catholic upbringing. She said one day the priest just kept going ON about women being sinful and all the things they shouldn’t do, and she looked down at us two little girls and decided that’s not the kind of beliefs she wanted us to be around. I can only imagine how different it could have been for us.
I'm thankful she pulled you and your sister out too. That is not a real Spirit led church. You're mother was wise for realising that those are not the teachings or love of Christ. I pray that you all hold a revelation of the real depth and love God has for you all. Romans 8:1 - "Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus,"
Bless your mother. I'm so glad you were all able to escape what could've been a very traumatizing life for all of you. People always ask me why I don't go to Church if I believe in God, so I ask them why the Church is discriminatory when God is not. They never have a good response to that. Always be wary of organized religion.
@@nomoretwitterhandles They would be hardpressed to have to admit to themselves that churches are formed and led by humans and not usually our best ones.
I think about that so much -- how different things would have been. My father was a pastor and wound up in prison for the things he did (and justified doing with the bible). And if he hadn't forcibly been taken out of our lives when we were little, we'd still be there. I think frequently about what that "alternate timeline" girl who was raised in the church would have been like
Listening to preachers daughter is like watching midsommar. It’s such an incredible piece of art but it is so deeply disturbing. It’s sticks to you like hot wax.
The cult of southern Christianity is so incredibly hard to explain unless you have experienced it. You did a better job than I’ve ever been able to. Leaving the church is so isolating. “I forgave god” gave me chills. Hats off to you for working to leave behind the resentment you feel. You’re not alone, I’m working on it too. Hard to not resent an institution and it’s followers that hate me and all the people I love.
And how it boils down to loving real people that exist over a god that nobody can even prove exists. That’s what’s so painful about it. Knowing that my family chooses to love the equivalent of an imaginary friend over real people is sobering, and that they’re doing it exclusively out of fear of being punished by that entity. It’s like it creates a rage towards god for doing that to our families.
Yeah I can't explain it well but as someone who was raised in a mostly catholic country that's not the US (Ireland, literally all the decent schools are catholic too) even the most religious people here I've talked too can all agree that there's a certain brand of insanity that comes with American Christians, literally half the shit that goes on over there wouldn't fly here at all.
“I hated everyone that made me feel like I wasn’t doing things right, even though inside I was happy.” Hit me so hard, tears were immediately in my eyes. I had to go no contact with my parents and middle brother, and it’s changed/ruined relationships with other family member because they don’t get it. The intense judgement is hard to swallow. Powerful. I love listening to this woman talk.
As an ex-catholic who started to realize the problems within the church at a young age and who started to cause household issues bc of it, you already KNOW my hand are OFF the wheel and my eyes are CLOSED and I am LISTENING
Catholics are the fakest a “Christian” can get. They don’t even follow the 10 commandments and ironically have in fact changed some of them🤡 not only that but they’ve taken many books out of the Bible, totally not sus💀 I don’t suggest throwing Christianity away completely, seek the full truth, God just wants to love you he doesn’t want you to come to mass for hours or pray to statues or whatever they do lmao, he just wants you to form a personal relationship with him, Jesus is God in full form, he is the father son and spirit we accept into our life’s, this is factual tho the Catholic Church will never acknowledge it, read Isaiah 9:7- this verse is the Old Testament prophecy of Jesus birth and to no surprise it calls him both a son, father, and our prince of peace (the spirit) and if that doesn’t do it for ya it also boldly says he will be called GOD. Jesus went back to heaven with his body to reign in full form until his return. Son was metaphorical for his human form. don’t let the evil Catholic Church fool you and turn you off from Jesus completely. Seek him. I suggest looking for a Pentecostal apostolic church, they have the full truth baptize in Jesus name, speak in tongues (heavenly language given by God which is real I experience it too) you will never experience a peace and joy like this I promise, No disrespect but catholics do not have the joy of the lord, true joy. Anyone can say they are happy and content but it doesn’t compare to the fountain of living water Jesus gives daily.
As a straight white male from Texas, I agree with everything Brittany is saying, and it's so critical that we all fight the good fight for equality and equity. I love that she uses her platform for so much good. Trans rights are human rights!! Love you Brittany! I also grew up the same way religiously and have so much deeply rooted trauma religiously and it was so healing to hear someone share the same experience.
So if you're fighting for trans rights. Who's fighting for women's rights? Or should we erase female bathrooms, prisons, sports, scholarships, safe houses and shelters?
"You're creating the problem and you are the sole person who can fix it" 29:52 . That *PUNCHED* me in the gut. I was born and raised in a cult and I still feel that to this day. There's like, a nagging in my head telling me that I need to repent, I need to go back, I'm doing so much sin, it feels like its impossible to escape... But I know there's nothing wrong with how I'm living. I'm not hurting anyone, and this joy I've only gotten to feel outside of it is worth every struggle.
Fellow black sheep liberal of the family and wow you have really put into words what I always struggle to. The complete lack of empathy for their fellow man whilst screaming about how strong their faith is is so incredibly hypocritical and frustrating. It’s impossible to explain to these people because their level of cognitive dissonance is so high. Thanks for giving a voice to this phenomenon because I think so many more of us are experiencing it than talk about it.
I have been periodically ranting about this for years. They say they love their neighbor. But if that neighbor is homeless, trans, gay, POC, an immigrant or fat then they deserved whatever tragedy befell them, or aren't deserving of basic respect. They always speak so negatively about people different from them. If they are the righteous, I will gladly go to hell.
hands off the wheel, eyes closed, petal to the metal, in the opposite lane, drunk, sleeping, unbuckled, texting, playing cod, screaming, and ready to listen
Christian here. No idea if anyone will see this (much less Brittany), but what has been brought up throughout this video is so incredibly valuable. 35:53 in particular really, really struck me. That's what I think Christianity should be. It's also the only thing I can absolutely agree with within the Church right now. Jesus wasn't somebody that railed against marginalized communities; those were the people he spent the most time with and stood up for. He professed the love and selflessness Brittany mentioned. He directly challenged the wealthy, the powerful, and the performative, and called out hyprocrisy as he saw it. That was Jesus. A man that sacrificed everything to demonstrate love for others, and who DIRECTLY called out a lot of religious and social issues. There is a lot of that religious hypocrisy within American Christianity, and the cultural constructs we choose to see "outsiders" through. She is so, so right on so many fundamental issues within the Church. Many of us have truly become what Jesus referred to the Pharisees as: a den of vipers, and performers. Gatekeepers of faith and love as things to be used as rewards, and not to be given generously. We do not love as we should, and we don't demonstrate what Jesus demonstrated. Even the "choosing God over family and friends." There's a huge difference between disagreement on religious and spiritual values, and holding it over those that disagree. Anyway, Brittany... I'm really proud you brought all this up. Thank you for standing up for worthwhile topics like these. You're awesome.
It’s refreshing to see a Christian who can speak up and acknowledge the worst parts of your community instead of hearing criticism and taking it personally like “akshully not all Christians…”
41:35 “And I hated everyone that made me feel like I wasn’t doing things right even though inside I was happy” DAMN that felt like a punch to the gut 😭 as someone who has experienced very similar things, I really appreciate the vulnerability in this episode ❤️
My Christian family still ask me all the time if I’m gay just because I advocate for the LGBTQ+ community (and happen to be single) and it breaks my heart that they can’t even fathom caring so much for a group of people that they aren’t in. It’s so frustrating trying to talk to them about it
Literally. It’s crazy that my family couldn’t fathom me caring for the LGBTQ+ community, or any community really, if I was not in it (this was before I realized I’m in the community lmao).
As an ex-christian. I got every word you said. The community aspect of religion is incredible, but for what. It’s all a guise. I’ve never felt so alone than in a church with other people.
Brittany, thank you so much for sharing this. I left the Evangelical Christian church four years ago and it has been the most confusing, tumultuous, isolating years of my life. My family is also still very religious and routinely informs me I will be "spending an eternity in hell." That sense of feeling like you're always living wrong is so real and so easily fucks with your head. I feel less alone when I hear experiences like yours. It's incredibly comforting to know I'm not alone, yet I'm sorry you've also had to endure the pain that comes with leaving your religious upbringing behind. You speak with such eloquence and clarity. It 's hard to do that knowing family members are watching from afar. Thank you for showing up authentically and doing it with fervor. You inspire me to do the same. Much love
@@amoodyb they're hunting me because I never show up in church anymore and I've cut my hair short (it's unacceptable to them and it's symbolic to me), im busy with work now and also with rinsing myself off of the seemingly innate shame and guilt I feel all the time so I can look at people in the eyes and not see a reflection of a distorted image i see in the mirror. basically, it's been good.
@@pinkcockroach it can be so stressful when getting away from the faith and all that. I’m currently going through some stuff that has to do with that. So I feel ya. Man, it’s stressful.
I know Brittany will never see this. I’m a 43 year old gay man. I follow her because she’s fun and light, but this made me tear up. She’s such an intelligent person. Thank you Brittany for saying it better than I ever could! ❤️
omg the experience of your family “poking the bear” under the guise of just wanting to “learn” when really they just want an argument and another chance to try and prove you wrong is SO REAL. it drives me fuckin NUTS and then IM the bitch when i walk away from certain conversations in the name of protecting myself and keeping the peace. why do i have to be the bigger person when im 20+ years younger than the people antagonizing me?
LITERALLY and hearing this makes me feel better because i feel so guilty about not trying to change their vote to make them less damaging to human rights but it’s exactly “how can i teach you about human empathy”
me too! public enemy #1 here. i tried for YEARS. i let them be the bad guy, i was nice, i was nasty, i listened, i tried, i sent links, i watched things, i approached it every way you can imagine and no one fucking cares. my uncle tried to spill my fiancé’s bud light last summer (siiiiiiigh) and said fuck you to my face when i asked if he could please stop obsessing over dylan mulvaney minding her business and let us enjoy my father’s birthday dinner. my fiancé physically removed me to safety…at which point my father followed to yell at me for making a scene. i never thought id get married in a church but i always thought my family would be there. i’m bisexual. my fiancé is black. if you cannot comprehend that we and other people are full fucking human beings you have NO PLACE whatsoever in OUR family’s lives. and they instigate every time, blame me, and will continue to blame and resent people for *checks notes* understanding/caring more about human rights than they do and trying to gently ask why they dont. it’s fucking bullshit. r/qanoncasualties is a great resource but it kills me that so many of us are living this right now
Omfg my grandma would do this shit with my mom and I was so blind. One instance was when she, in front of everyone in Church said I wanted to be baptized when I never said anything. I would have to go to Christian, Pentecostal, and a Catholic Church when my parents were separated and it's so incredibly frustrating hearing so many different things and feeling like no matter what I do it's something wrong. And every excuse of hers was "bc God" basically. We dont talk to her anymore lmao
When she started tearing up, I sobbed, Thank you for speaking up for us , the people who are sick and tired constant contradictions in religion and how it absolutely tears you apart.
This is my first Broski Report and I get the sense this is a weird first one to watch lol. I only ever saw Brittany guesting with codyko and I never thought much of her beyond just being yet another internet comedian. But she has articulated so perfectly all of my feelings towards american christianity it's like she hopped in my head, took a look around, and shared with the world. I'm so glad I found this.
As a woman who grew up TERRIFIED of the catholic church and terrified of the religion she was born into but having to act like I cared even though I never felt connection to it I can whole heartedly say this episode captivated me. It's so comforting to hear someone I relate to say they feel similar things.
“I envy the faithful. I do.” CHILLS 😭 I loved church and the community when I was younger but now I can’t be apart of something where a majority is so hateful and ignorant. I wish i could believe it something that much but I just can’t
as a trans man who left the church of god as soon as i left tennessee, i was brought to tears by how vulnerable and personal you got this episode. keep it moving, brittany, you always bring me light when i need it most.
Oh man i was crying right along with you. Pastor's daughter and idk if it's because of the holidays too but i almost started bawling when i was shopping in target yesterday watching families walk around together. I thought about my family and how i wish i could just agree with them on things. Life would be so much easier and i would get along with them so much better buts its just not what i believe and its created such a big ripple in my relationship with them. You hit the nail on the head with the way they vote and talk about how some people shouldn't have basic human rights.....i had a discussion with my dad and told him if thats how christians believe i dont want any part of it and its so hard for me to put myself in this position cause I'm alone in it in my family so they all think I'm the crazy one. Ugh and then when you talked about like of course we all felt emotional during alter calls.....and faking it.....whew. yep. *Big hug*
I’ve been thinking about Sylvia Plath’s quote “I need a father, I need a mother, I need some older, wiser being to cry to. I talk to God but the sky is empty.” I feel like Britney just gets it, losing your faith and being closed off from your family and friends because of it is such a difficult thing to go through. I was raised in a christian school, and anytime you questioned anything you were put down, I read the bible front to back so many times and that truly made me see the faults of the church and the religion itself. seeing myself lose everyone in the final years, solely for caring for those we were taught to shun and hate, was a heartbreak that I never imagined.
Every time Brittany cries I just can't help but cry alongside her, to be so seen and heard by a person on the internet is something so serene and special. Holy shit do I love president broski.
“I can’t explain basic human empathy to you” Oof, I felt that in my SOUL because that’s truly what it boils down to. My parents lack the empathy for anyone who doesn’t have their same skin color or share their same beliefs, and to have to explain that to them is like talking to a brick wall. The understanding of empathy will never break through to them and it’s so hard and frustrating to come to terms with.
And it's so incredibly enraging cause I know if it wasn't for the church, they could experience a kinder side of humanity. I could feel comfortable with them without randomly being reminded of what beliefs have so intrinsically been put into their minds. This episode made be cry so hard esp w these comments😭
@@tymberssi relate so hard to this, the rage in feeling like religion robbed you of the parents that you once had/could’ve had and never will-it’s such a profound, lonely sense of grief that is so tinged in anger from religion literally de-empathizing the people in your life you were once close to-damn im about to cry just thinking of this, thank you for your comment, it just resonated so well with me
What hit so hard in this was the fact that as a child how grew up in Christianity, I felt that same validation that Brittany mentioned that you seeked for. Including faking it. I just wanted to feel the same great thing that I saw people felt around me. Including the evidence of it like crying, falling to your knees, passing out, and talking in tongues. Since I was young I wanted that too since kids my age would feel it. And I was so confused why I wouldn’t feel it so I’d fake it. Hearing that I wasn’t the only one hit me so hard that im tearing up now writing this.
can i hear some NOISEEEE for our parents believing we’re burning for eternity for the sheer fact that we don’t declare jesus as our lord & saviour!!!!!! 🎉🎉
“I forgave God.” Straight up fully body chills. The power and energy radiating off her this episode is aaaabsolutely making me sob/ cheer like a feral banshee.
i went to a christian high school and went on a school trip to a worship conference on winter. it was three 9 hours days and i remember thinking on the last day “why can’t i cry? do i not love God enough? why isn’t the Holy Spirit choosing me?” it’s such a weird thing to grapple with and it was nice to hear you speak so honestly about it
so relatable, i grew up in church and all my friends and family seemed like they felt god’s presence in such a real way and i was just so confused as to why i never felt a thing, back then i just assumed it had to do with me not reading my bible or something 😭😭
The point isn’t to cry just bc, you cry bc you actually know him, and when you do know him you can’t let go. You haven’t met him you loved the idea of a god but you’ve never met him you can though
I come back to this episode all the time. I think Ethel Cains' Preachers Daughter can relate to so many groups of people; Christians/ religious followers, queer people, abused people, women, etc. In some way or another, your story is represented in this album. My mother ran away from Christian faith and an abusive Christian family. She raised me without religion, but because she lost hers, i witnessed, and in so, suffered the pain of my mother that Brittany describes in this episode. I sob every time i watch it, but it's so comforting. Brittany's vulnerability is so reassuring. This woman deserves the world!
“im so happy to be alive!" cue me full on sobbing. that sentiment is so easy to forget. when everything in my life is shrouded by terrible things, i am still here and i can and do find joy, even if in small moments and that makes it so worth it.
As a fellow preacher’s daughter who just finished crying while listening to Ethel Cain, I hope the experience is as cathartic for you as it was for me lmao
As an ex-southern Christian I’m so grateful and happy to listen to another person’s experience of religion and how it traumatized them. Religion isolates you from the outside world as a tactic to keep you from learning other ideologies, but seeing Brittany talk about the exact same trauma helps me not feel so alone. Thank you queen 😍😍
It’s so funny the ad just before this video was for Mark Wahlburgs Christian Hallow prayer app. I’m listening to this on the depressing drive home from saying goodbye for what will probably be the last time to my sweet, precious great grandmother. There’s just something about hearing Brittany froth at the mouth over Ghost cosplayer hog that’s so comforting rn. It’s what Mema would have wanted. Thank you Brittany.
As a preachers daughter, I know your pain and grief. I am about to be 33 and I'm still working through things in therapy that I learned when I was young. It feels validating to know I'm not alone ❤
this was a very awakening episode for me. you spoke things i couldn’t put words to and now i feel like that weight is gone. “i can’t explain basic human empathy to you” this is my fave podcast
i grew up mormon and this episode hit so hard. brittany is so eloquent, she perfectly encapsulates what it’s like to grow up christian and feeling the weight of religious trauma !!
This was THE most dynamic episode far and thats saying something 😭😭😭 Going feral -> crying about religious trauma -> going feral was WILD i love her sm 😭😭
This episode literally touched a part of my brain in a way that no conversation I’ve had with anyone in my life about how growing up in a household that chose religion over basic human decency and respect that I could never explain. Thank you ❤
I left the church last year, and my whole family and 79% of Oklahoma are Christian; it's so isolating. I appreciate how vulnerable you are about it, and your words make me feel seen and validated for leaving the church.
Fellow oklahoman here who has left the state- the isolation i felt from family, friends, peers, teachers etc was unbearable. But there is better out there!
As an ex -christian and trans woman, Preachers Daughter is such a visceral and hauntingly real depiction of what sort of isolation organized religion can bring over you. How quickly I lost my family after coming out was horrible, and the feeling of walking around as the 'black sheep' of the family for being different, and there opposition to your existence and the existence and thriving of others as some sort of political stance is so draining. Learning Ethel was trans as well, the lyrics to the intro song are so powerful and resonate a lot with personally. 😢
It’s so stupid that people feel like they can just disagree with the existence of queer and trans people. Our existence was not political until they made it political.
I just got Ethel Cain’s lyrics tattooed on my arm, “I forgive it all as it comes back to me”. I’ve been through so much in my life and I feel like it just really resonated with me, it’s my most treasured tattoo now. I’m sooo happy Brittany talked about this aaaaaa
40:00 I think it's really, really powerful you went through this. I was raised with an agnostic mother and an atheist father and I never had to grieve what happened to me after I died or that I was somehow living wrong in the eyes of God. Not really, anyway. As someone that has seen Christians lose their faith and adopt a different world view in their 20s, the fear and the grief is real. To come out of it on the other side with love in your heart is a fucking challenge and triumph and I don't think that should be understated. I felt jealous of others' faith and the positive side of church, (the community, the sharing of emotion). It does contain really beautiful things. Thank you so much for sharing that. I bet a lot of people feel close to you in what you've been through too. There's still magic in the world, in art, in music, and in being human. I find my spiritual side coming through there too.
My eyes are closed and Jesus has FULLY taken the wheel. As someone who is the liberal, progressive black sheep of her family in a rural Catholic upbringing, it's been a journey to really develop a healthy, beautiful relationship with faith that's independent from the religious structures I was baptized into... Thank you always, girl, for being vulnerable and real and honest. Giving you virtual hugs. The Broski nation comments are a manifestation space, so putting it into the universe now that you will get that good Ghost hog. Loving you, Brittany!
I appreciate Brittany for being so honest and vulnerable with us. I hope she knows how beautiful, compassionate and wise her outlook on life is. Her following her true beliefs and being critical about what was taught is amazing, she's amazing.
i’m super late but just a tidbit about the track “hard times”- it’s not only about ethel feeling the pressure of her father’s faith and status as a preacher after his death, but also her ongoing trauma from her experiencing CSA from him in her young childhood :( the lines “in the corner on my birthday you watched me/ dancing right there in the grass/ i was too young to notice/ that some types of love can be bad” and “nine going on eighteen, lay it on me” and the repetition of “please, can i sleep?” in the outro are especially tied to this. i believe she even ties both of these ideas back in “american teenager” when she says “and i feel you there/ in the middle of the night when the lights go out/ but im all alone out here” and these little details make me fucking insane about this album 🤗💔 i love your interpretation of the feeling that you can’t get away from the guilt of christianity long after you leave the church tho!! i’ve never thought about that aspect of it before.
Btw for anyone who doesn't know, she said its not actually based on her own experience of SA as a child or anything, it's the character's. Just so no one gets confused.
Brittany, I genuinely don't know if you'll see this gurl but I am writing this from the other side of the Earth, formerly engulfed within an equally toxic Abrahamic religion, and I am re-learning, trying to re-wire my brain, and although we lived such different lives, your experience resonates with me on a different level. I don't know you, but I love you. And I am so proud of you and of me and of all the women alike. And yes, I also did cry during Barbie. We are of two different languages, different religions, different histories and ethnicities; yet the misogyny and religious trauma we lived through unites us. Blessed be the feminine love. 💋 ILY babe.
It's rare to have young creators talk about something that you relate to on such a deep and personal level like religious trauma - specifically American Evangelism. And to strike a chord within you, talking so openly about their experiences and their family.. The respect I have for this woman, just being herself online and really baring her soul. With the many silly moments, she's not afraid to dive into these topics. You have a way of speaking that is so genuine and heartfelt; I got emotional from this episode. I think it's become one of my favorites.
perfectly said! I’ve seen Brittany in her viral videos and she is absolutely hilarious, but to see her vulnerability and how you explained her “barring her soul”, it was like a breath of fresh air to hear from an “influencer” or someone I just see online. It felt very genuine and real to hear her perspectives and it was very moving.
I left the church after my first miscarriage. Preachers, family, friends all they could say was “we don’t understand God’s plan” “it’s just gods plan” gods plan was to take my baby? I couldn’t accept that. Along with everything else of course. And I spent so long hating the religion and hating god. I’ve finally after years of resentment come to peace with it all. I’ve come to peace with being out of the religion and my family continuing to accept “gods plan”. Thank you for this Brittany. It’s tough to be in the south as an atheist/agnostic.
Sorry that happened to you, and that people said such unintentionally hurtful things to you then. As someone who was raised atheist, ppl thinking I would find more comfort if I stopped believing there's horrible accidents and unfortunate circumstances, and instead believe that there was a god out there putting me through it, has always been mindboggling to me.
I’m a Pastor’s kid… now agnostic/atheist. I have never had someone speak SO accurately to the trauma of leaving the church in a religious family and all the unlearning that has to be done. ❤
Girl I was raised Pentecostal and you hit it dead on the nail. If you didn’t speak in tongues you weren’t “filled with the Holy Ghost” I tried so hard to be “filled” and just gave up and started speaking gibberish and the way I got so much more respect afterwards was so isolating because I knew I lied.
grew up in a Pentecostal church and i never had the feeling to raise my hands durring worship or speak in tongues, and i was waiting for that moment that i would feel the “holy spirit” in that way, i used to lift my hands occasionally but that “holy spirit” feeling really never came
I had a similar experience with faking speaking tongues in my youth group. Then later told my mom that I did it thinking I’d also get praise from her (which I craved so badly) since she was also very religious and she flipped out on me and said I’m going to hell for speaking in tongues so the confusion i felt from being told by two different sides what is right and wrong was so confusing when I was just trying to feel something
I listened to this episode on the way to work this morning and cried the whole way there. Started out as sad tears when she talked about her childhood and the times she wishes could of been spent on other things instead of being in the church(because I can relate to that) and then very joyful tears when she started speaking on now being so happy to be alive (because I can also relate to that). This episode was so nice to listen to knowing my experience growing up in the church wasn’t singular to me.
"All we really have is each other" This resonates so much with me, as a person who became agnostic after being raised Catholic. It's so hard for me to comprehend that so many people are only selfless in order to get a good spot in heaven. A place that may not even exist. No one is kind just to be kind. If you are a good and thoughtful person all your life, but God sends you to hell for not believing in him, that's not a God I would want.
That also really resonated with me. All my life I always asked my family “ if a person is a good person their whole life, helping and uplifting people, they’re gonna go to hell simply because they don’t believe in god? And people who claim to be godly people yet treat people as nothing but vermin will go to heaven because they went to church every Sunday?” They’d look at me quite puzzled and say “ well if you don’t accept Jesus as your one true savior…”blah blah I’m sure you know the rest. It always made me feel uneasy even to this day.
God does that simply because you have the ability to have free will. He is giving you free will in this world therefore he is giving you the choice to believe in him. If you don't that's okay since you have that right, but if you don't believe in him why would he force you to be with him in heaven? That would be going against your free will.
@@aaronlord5066 Honestly I totally understand what you mean by this question it can be a very hard one to answer. I would look into it more and research it but here's my Christian opinion on this. We are all sinful beings period. In Christianity, sin isn't measured as one is worse than the other. It can be a hard thing to grasp, trust me I get it completely. A person can not be a "good person their whole life" In Christianity it doesn't work like that. We are all deemed sinful, hence why Jesus Christ died on the cross for OUR sins so we could be forgiven and reunite with him in heaven. God gives us a choice, hence why we have free will. He doesn't force us to believe in him, he wants us to come to him on our own. And we have that choice to or not to, due to our free will. If God gives us free will to follow him in this world, we can follow him to heaven because we made that choice to be with him. If you don't choose to walk with God and have a relationship with him, why would he force you to go to heaven and be with him for eternity? That goes against our free will, plus that would kinda suck to be trapped with someone you never wanted anything to do with right? Why would u want to go to heaven when you don't even believe in it. Or if you don't walk with God through pain and suffering on earth to deserve to be in heaven? The second type of person is a prime example of how we are all sinners, although we all are sinners God teaches us to hate the sin but love the sinner. We don't go to heaven just because we go to church every Sunday or follow the 10 commandments. That is just strictly religion, a continuous routine with no true connection. Jesus Christ tells us in the bible how he dislikes the concept of religion. The Pharisees were religious and Jesus didn't like that, due to various reasons. All they did was follow strict rules like a ritual. God wants us to have a relationship with him, not a religion. Those 2 things are vastly different. Christianity is known for being very forgiving. No matter the sin if you ask for forgiveness truly wholeheartedly God will forgive you and you will ascend to heaven when you pass. It can be hard to understand how someone so awful can repent and go to heaven, trust me I get that. But that's why Jesus Christ died was so he could take OUR sins and allow us to be forgiven, no matter the sin. And that all goes back to how a sin isn't worse or better then any other in God's eyes because we are all the same and all are sinful. That is why Christianity is not to judge one and other because we all are the same in God's image. Also I wanted to say intent matters definitely. If someone says their Christian, go to church every Sunday, but treat everyone with disrespect it makes them hypocritical and very sinful. It shows the person's character. But as a Christian I have to understand I am not better then anyone else due to my nature of making mistakes or slipping up and treating people poorly at times, which I'm sure we all have been like that at some point and God knows that. So if we learn our wrongs and understand them and ask for forgiveness God will forgive us. I hope this made sense sorry I went on such a long explanation. Ive just been in your shoes before and I would've loved someone to explain this to me in a way that made some sort of sense. I also wanna apologize for the things that the other Christians have said, some can be very forceful and disrespectful. Not all of us are :). Hope this helped!!
I am actually so thankful for how she graphically went in on Ethel Cain!!!!! Ethel deserves SO much praise and attention for her masterpieces, truly. She is beyond incredible and I'm so glad to see her get visibility. Thank you for making this omg you BEAUTIFULLY explained your own struggles and I could relate so much.
i relate heavily to faking spiritual experiences in the name of holding onto connections with others. the more you spoke- about family poking fun at you, about the hypocrisy of the individualistic nature of american christians- the more i cried. thank you for putting everything i’ve felt into words. i’ve never heard my inner feelings so well laid out in language. thank you thank you thank you.
brittany casually started talking about music again after spilling the realest and most emotional speech as if it were an art with such emotion and passion
44:09, being at Pride events make me feel how you are describing. I so deeply resonate with needing that sense of community. There is something so profound about being united with complete strangers through something so deep and personal that you all share. It is a “larger than life” but comforting feeling to look around a room not knowing anyone but on some level, *knowing* them. I hope you find community filled with positive and supportive relationships. I hope you experience that feeling again.
I was baptized twice and saved four times at friend’s churches where people didn’t know me, and each and every time I assumed I wasn’t doing something right because I never felt “It.” Still haven’t, and now I know that’s okay. Thanks for being so open, Brittany
You have such a way of making me cry with laughter then cry actual tears. So much humor, knowledge, passion, etc. When you spoke on Christianity and religion, you spoke to my SOUL, girl!! I agree with you so deeply. I always felt so out of place at church, youth group functions, and so on. Faking it and feeling uncomfortable. I only enjoyed church and youth group so i could hang with my friends. I was always forced to go to church, attend youth group, etc. The fear and guilt based practices are abhorrent. When you said that music theory folks talk about the chords of worship songs being intentional and another form of manipulation, it blew my mind. It makes SO much sense! The severity of manipulation and gaslighting religion performs is disgusting. I have low-level PTSD from religion and all that. I'm 42, and I only found a spirituality that makes me feel good, comfortable, and true joy. I connect to the universe and nature, and I don't have to feel guilty or have to fake it. When you said music is like spirituality, you're absolutely right. Music can connect to my soul more than perhaps anything else. My BFF and I went to a concert with our favorite band a yr or 2 ago. We have seen them so many times. The lead singer, the band, and the lyrics are just incredible. They stand up against bullying, promote mental health awareness, and suicide prevention. Their set lasted 2 full hours, and I've never felt more spiritually cleansed in my life. It had nothing to do w religion or god, just pure compassion, empathy, and goodness. I told my BFF that this concert was my church, and the lead singer was the pastor. I've never ever in my life felt that way in a church or church-related. The church and religion itself made me so scared, paranoid, guilty, and all the worst feelings. The god they pushed on me at such a young age made me rebel against "god." Now, I feel like the universe is looking out for me. I tell the moon my sorrows and secrets. I recharge with the sun. I would rather spend every minute in nature, surrounded by flora and fauna than literally any person. Anyway...guess I needed to get this off my chest, as well. Thank you for your vulnerability, it makes me feel more seen and heard than most. You get it. Thank you. ❤
The emotional rollercoaster. From cosplay hog to humanity and religion. As a queer person it pains me to see this culture war play out in front of me under the guise of morality via religion. Thank you Brittany.
as someone who was raised religiously and who feels like the “black sheep” of the family, this video was so healing. i really and truly appreciate when brittany talks about genuine, serious things like religious trauma because it makes me feel less alone. thanks madam president❤
I'm currently healing my inner teenager by finally allowing myself to crush on fictional characters, so you being so unapologetic about it is really reassuring and therapeutic
Brittany, I don’t know if you’ll see this. But if you do, thank you for being you. I’ve watched you here and there throughout the years and have been binging you during H3’s break and stumbled upon this episode. I’ve been through a lot in 25 years. And I think a lot of it is tied to religious trauma. You speaking on this made me tear up because it’s really difficult finding people who can reach your soul and speak the words you can’t find. Thank you for being so open and honest about everything. You make me laugh until I’m tearing up, but you’re also so genuine and warm that it makes me tear up. You’re a true voice for those of us who do not have much of one. Signed a fan from a small town in Tennessee awaiting the day I can escape to a better place❤️
Brittney. I can’t find the words to properly share the appreciation I have for you. I’m currently a “spiritual” southerner who is left leaning, however I have not always been that way. To watch someone who is well known and well established that can so beautifully articulate the hardships of our shared upbringing is so comforting and validating. From a Bitter Southerner, Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
I grew up in a family that isn't religious at all and so I don't understand but it's so strange how people lose all empathy and kindness for those who find comfort in other religions/spirituality, it's really jarring to hear people talk about their traumas with religion. Thank you for this episode brittany❤
I honestly envy people who grew up in a sort of neutral house when it comes to religion because man the feeling of getting older and for the first time seeing your beliefs from an unbiased perspective and suddenly realizing the huge possibility that none of it is real, suddenly having everything you’ve ever known about life and death and your purpose and your existence and your identity and everything just ripped away. It’s so scary. I just kinda wish I had the oppertunity to grow up in an environment where I could decide those things for myself and be able to see the different perspective and possibilities so it wouldn’t slam me in the face one day as a teenager. All I know is I’m doing a lot of reconstruction, and I’m not sure if It will lead me back to Christianity or it will lead somehwere else. All I know is I want to believe in what I believe in because that’s what I genuinely think is right and not just cuz it’s been indoctrinated into me yk
My mother stayed in their room for about a decade because they were afraid of the rapture. Everything was symbolized as evil or unholy. When I came out to my mother as gay, she she would say and still to this day, “ it’s not my place to tell you how to live your life. God told me to love you regardless.”
I’m 19 and went to a Catholic School for six years of my life. As a kid, it fucks your mind up. It truly does and there are some nasty people who are saying that they are “Christ-Like” unfortunately. Brittany, your words spoke to me and I felt them all in my bones. You truly are a gift to this world. Thank you for the content and words you speak❤️🩹
“To constantly feel like you have something to repent for or have to ask for forgiveness. Your own existance is sinful” Broski got me sobbing right now
for a latino church, they decieve white looking females to bait, confuse, force bribe, manipulate destroy any hope they have especially if they like someone of the same skin color (paleness) the frenemies target the weakness of the white looking female (of foreign decent) south american Europeans of ancestry and sabotage the other with so much misery to the point of self destruction and complete isolation, white the female is obligated by their frenemies friends to do the spokesmen says, a manipulational force to observe the weakness of the low self esteem female to give up her personal freedom, and wind up with a decent of dis interest, yet giving the circumstances its for the money, and a false indoctrination by enemy pastors that led astray the other, because of the tabs, information that we, the weak,the norm, people give them, the operation of complete mirage of crafty operations to destroy our destiny, and yet they know, after a few months, they want others to forget about what they do behind it all, the operation to tell others (those who destroyed you in church)ahead of an uprising timing for those who were led astray
i mean... that's not a 'take'. That's literally what the bible says lmao. That everyone is born a sinner. IDK for me it's kind of comforting
I understand that frustration if you don't have a relationship with God. Like how can you live and care for someone you don't know and that seems like someone that is always mad. However I challenge that notion with actually getting to know God and his true charcter. God loves and adores us so much. To want to be better and ask for forgiveness is like being in a loving relationship where you hurt the other person and say you are sorry and are trying to be better. I don't think that is bad at all. You can't love someone you don't know but that love God has and always had foer you is there and is always available. You don't have to be perfect but you do have to ask and keep your heart open. Love can't get in with your walls completely up but luckily God works around that wall even is we bring it down an inch.
@@TheZombiesEatOreos God doesn't love nor adore us, the Bible makes that clear to me. It's an authoritarian gaslighter.
I was raised in the Catholic faith and original sin is a concept they have where you’re born with the sin of Adam and Eve. To me this sends the message that you’re born sinful and wrong
the way brittany can hold a conversation with herself for an hour this frequently is truly impressive
What a skill
@@misskuni When I do it it gets blamed on my ADHD...
@@LimitlessMegan When *I* do it it gets blamed on "psychosis" and "schizophrenia" 🙄
@@pannercakes487LOL!!
Actually though. I usually don't like solo podcasts bc theyre kinda awkward and quiet but she's so good at talking to herself lmao
Listening to this cleaning my room.
“Religious trauma is the pain of your family choosing god over you”
And now I’m violently sobbing
ow crying
Me too girl, i'll never understand because I could never choose religion over my child/family.
Big yikes
I hope everybody took some time to recover from the trauma, if recovery is still ongoing, keep pushing !! Do what you can with what you have (easier said than done I know)
trying to breathe this was like a punch in the gut
Everytime I hear "I envy the faithful" I burst into tears. I do. I used to have that blissful ignorance. I used to have the closeness and shared beliefs with my family. But after the age of 12 that all started changing, and now, at 22, it's completely gone, and it IS incredibly isolating. Brittany makes me feel less alone.
Ive heard people changing their mind about religion at 12 yeara old SO MANY TIMES I dont think it means anything, but its so curious to me. I stopped believeing in God altogether at 12, and a couple of friends had the same experience, a few strangers too. Makes me think: whats going on at 12 thar made us break?
Girl same, I’m almost 23 in a couple weeks which is making me spiral about a lot of things. Including struggling with my faith and if I should get back into it or not
@@ButtercupsEvilTwin8877@ButtercupsEvilTwin8877 Hey man, I'm right there with you. At least we're not alone 🤍
@@pepperpattynaise I think it's cause of puberty ngl. Religion tends to be weird when it comes to "losing your innocence" through your body and your desires Naturally developing. I think we break away as a literal survival tactic cause it's fuckin painful to hate yourself for your body, mind, desires and urges that aren't hurting anybody. For me? I realized I was bi at 12 and I realized that at least in this part of my life, it's either I choose to try and understand my newfound attraction to other boys or I hate myself for life. 12 is truly when you start seeing how you don't fit in that system anymore. And I hate that I feel guilty about it today at 19 years old
wow same for me i was twelve and now I’m 21 and I have given up on re-believing. I think I have stopped trying because I know it’s not meant for me and I am no longer ashamed of it. It is isolating at first but in a way it is liberating also
I felt so much meaning behind the statement “I forgave God”. I haven’t resonated with a sentence like this since “I toowk it to my penthouse and I fweaked it”
🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🤲🤲🤲🤲🤲🤲
HAHAHAH
Amen 🙏
FOR FUCKIN REAL THOOOO😭
I spat all over my phone when I read this 😂😂😂
"i can't explain basic human empathy to you" !!! girl you found the words to explain how so many of us feel after leaving the church. UGH THANK U FOR THIS EPISODE ILY
Girl same ❤
FR I DIDN'T KNOW HOW TO PUT IT
There's a good quote out there from author Lauren Morrill, when talking about affordable healthcare in the US, which says "I don't know how to explain to you why you should care about other people."
god i felt this SO HARD. my fam always finds these little digs, ways to press my buttons, but i never do that back for the fear of creating a giant argument. just not worth it to me.
@@GivebackthescarfI’d genuinely like to have an honest convo with you. Your perspective fascinates me. My parents are/were Christians but I could never say they were religious. I developed a relationship with God when I was 11 from the Bible Study at my school. And everything I did then for 6 years was for my personal relationship with God. However, the older I got, and the more I read the Bible, I realised it wasn’t for me. I didn’t want to pick and choose parts of the Bible that worked with my morals and beliefs and ignore the rest. Besides, does it not say God doesn’t want a lukewarm believer, or the whole “if you don’t forsake your mother and father for the cross, you can’t follow Jesus.” I feel scriptures like those clearly indicate the Lord wants a FULL believer and I can never be that. So I respect it but it’s not for me. I do have days where I hear a beautiful worship song and wonder maybe I can be Christian again, but I’m very convinced it will lead me back here where I am, aware that the path is narrow.
“I can’t explain basic human empathy to you” “I don’t understand this disconnect of why do I have to convince you to care”
Thank you Brittany.
Basically sums up my Christian experience in a nutshell.
I'm a Christian, and this was so well said and so respectful. I went through a lot of the same trauma that you talked about here and I understand being angry and having to unlearn and being estranged from your family. You didn't have to be respectful when talking about your hurt, but you were and that's why I love you. Thank you for who you are.
i wholeheartedly agree. i was born into a christian missionary family and was “saved” at four years old (??) and i fell away from God from age 16-30 and it was ONLY through love that i returned. that was four years ago and my faith is now stronger than it’s ever been. i resonated with so much if not all of what she said about her experience with religious trauma especially as it relates to family and cried along with her. brittany broski you are a damn treasure, girl.
IM DYING imagining people only listening to the first 15 minutes of this video then reading the comments like “thank you for this episode❤” 😭😭
🙈🙈🙉🙉lol
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
You know youve hit a new low when you stalk someone to find their costplayer crush. They literally follow eachother, and she has liked his photos since september. He also has a twitter and patreon with 18+ content. I had to
@@alifishiesomg don't be shy beastie who is it
@pissloud royaidni 🫣. I'm sorry Brittney
I am so happy that she keeps us updated on the Cosplaying Call Of Duty lore
Me tooo I never want her to stop
What's his name???
@@camiladeoliveira2390royaidni?
She's giving us what we need
I wanna see him holding a dead hamster …🐹
only brittany can talk about a ghost cosplayer showing his wiener online, and 30 minutes later talk about how religion scared her for life. i love it
the duality of man
Truly an icon.
obsessed is an understatement
The rangeeeeee
Ok but who has the @…. for a friend
The fact that this started with hog talk and then left me crying because of how much fire she’s spitting is insane. I love Brittany SO MUCH
I came here from a tik tok, it was a clip from this episode of you talking about your strained relationship with your religious family.
So, when you began this episode with "I've got so much on my heart, I've got to put these words to camera", the LAST thing I was expecting was a story about a Ghost cosplayer going hog out on Twitter.
Same
😂😂😂😂
HOG OUT LMAO
Hog out
this was my FIRST episode of Broski Report, from a clip compilation including bits from the back half of this episode, about religion. So yeah same experience, she went "I have so much on my heart" and I went "oh wow she's serious" then she hit me with the "I have a favorite Call of Duty cosplayer" and I said "Now where is this going?"
her talking about her experience in the church and her struggles communicating with her family made me tear up. when you peel back the layers of goofy humour, brittany is so intelligent and kind and empathetic and i appreciate her content endlessly
i love her sm
so real, i love her sm
I felt what she said in my bones.
I genuinely love her sm
for a latino church, they decieve white looking females to bait, confuse, force bribe, manipulate destroy any hope they have especially if they like someone of the same skin color (paleness) the frenemies target the weakness of the white looking female (of foreign decent) south american Europeans of ancestry and sabotage the other with so much misery to the point of self destruction and complete isolation, white the female is obligated by their frenemies friends to do the spokesmen says, a manipulational force to observe the weakness of the low self esteem female to give up her personal freedom, and wind up with a decent of dis interest, yet giving the circumstances its for the money, and a false indoctrination by enemy pastors that led astray the other, because of the tabs, information that we, the weak,the norm, people give them, the operation of complete mirage of crafty operations to destroy our destiny, and yet they know, after a few months, they want others to forget about what they do behind it all, the operation to tell others (those who destroyed you in church)ahead of an uprising timing for those who were led astray
Brittany is so eloquent, man. The way she can make my side hurt from laughing one second and then have me BAWLING the next is actually a mystery to me. She’s better than like 99% of podcasters or talk show hosts
This is what makes us girls etc
yeah, the way she describes that peen
SO eloquent and intelligent !!!!
"And I forgave God."
I feel some some people dont know how HARD this line is
My problem is not god, but the PEOPLE who claim to speak in the name of god...
@@Jamhael1THIS I love this comment section it really feels like we all just collectively GET IT ❤️
@@Eiji_Kirishima next time, when a family member ask you "why you do not want to return to church and us?", answer them this:
"I cannot, because how can I trust people so ARROGANT to the point of claiming 'I know what god think'?"
@@Jamhael1 Writing this down right now 🙏🗒️✍️
@@Jamhael1makes sense but remember you can’t hate God because of a misrepresentation other people give of him. Mankind is not the author of our faith so bad behavior has nothing to do with the truth of Christianity .
“I can’t explain basic human empathy to you” WAS CRAZYYYY. I was never able to put it into words.
Crazy dude!! Brittany gets it. This is why she’s our leader.
“That was stripped of me, at my own hands” this ex-Mormon over here is SOBBING. Thank you for including such vulnerable and wise insights about your own experience. So much love.
Fellow ex Mormon here! You should listen to the song Untitled by Rachael Jenkins she is also ex Mormon and that’s one of her songs about ✨religious trauma✨
ex mormon who also cried listening to this. fuck I love brittnany.
same here!!@@madisonb3308
Same here. Dad was bishop and I was forced to come out when I was 17. Bullied at church and school. Dad does not talk to me and I always blame myself for hurting my family by being gay and go back and forth from hating and trying to love myself.
@@micahhowald8448 Also a (current however progressive) mormon. Coming out to mormon parents is the hardest thing I've ever done and they absolutely did not accept any part of me that identifies as queer. It's hard learning to love the parts of you that the church condemns as a sin. We can't blame ourselves for for being queer and our families being hurt by that.
All jokes aside, I’ve never really felt like I had religious trauma until now. “It feels like they chose god over you” has me me crying like a little baby rn. That hit so deep.
I feel you that line hit so deep. I was raised JW and one of their teachings is that you should always choose Jehovah over anyone else even yourself and it still really fucks with my mind whenever I think about it 😢
Omg same😭❤️❤️
@@spitdealer2668 yes! It’s such a toxic mindset when you realize everyone we should be putting first is here on Earth, in the flesh. I love Brit sm
for opening her platform so we can have these discussions and find comfort in knowing we’re not alone. I hope you’re able to heal past everything, friend
It sucks because as a kid I would always have the thought in the back of my mind that the people I love that didn’t love Jesus were going to hell. Fucked me up.
And when I figured out I was attracted to girls too all I could think about was the fact that now maybe I’m going to go to hell and my parents never denied that
I still remember when I was a kid, a little girl was standing next to me by the alter and she said “they like it when you raise your hands” and we both raised our hands together and my parents came and hugged me
Oof
as a lesbian who went to a christian church growing up, even though my parents weren’t very religious, just simply BEING in the church, feeling that horrible sensation like you don’t belong, like you’ve done something terribly wrong that you just can’t help, it’s horrible. The church never felt like a place of love to me, and i always wish it did. It always made me feel like a monster, like i didn’t belong at all. that hurts a lot
im also a lesbian and i felt the same way when i would talk to my friends at church and they would say stuff like "if you ever said you were gay i would leave you because its against my religion" and i couldn't believe she left me when i came out to her after being so close for like three years because she cared more about her religion then our friendship and it makes me feel guilty as well just for being who i am
@@dentchii2947 exactly!! first of all I’m so sorry that happened to you, but it happens unfortunately so often. People have treated me differently or left me for just the way I love and their opinions on it. it makes you feel like you have to keep such a natural part of yourself hidden :(
@@dentchii2947why would u be shocked when she literally told u what was gonna happen 💀😭
@@kidchannonit’s shocking to actually know that someone you love and considered a friend would leave because of who you are..?
@@Allovesya yeah like as if it’s not still surprising when someone choses their religion over their relationships,,,
This made me cry. I am so grateful to my mom for pulling our family out of the church when my sister and I were young, despite her catholic upbringing. She said one day the priest just kept going ON about women being sinful and all the things they shouldn’t do, and she looked down at us two little girls and decided that’s not the kind of beliefs she wanted us to be around. I can only imagine how different it could have been for us.
I'm thankful she pulled you and your sister out too. That is not a real Spirit led church. You're mother was wise for realising that those are not the teachings or love of Christ. I pray that you all hold a revelation of the real depth and love God has for you all.
Romans 8:1 - "Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus,"
Bless your mother. I'm so glad you were all able to escape what could've been a very traumatizing life for all of you. People always ask me why I don't go to Church if I believe in God, so I ask them why the Church is discriminatory when God is not. They never have a good response to that. Always be wary of organized religion.
@@nomoretwitterhandles They would be hardpressed to have to admit to themselves that churches are formed and led by humans and not usually our best ones.
I wish my parents were like this
I think about that so much -- how different things would have been. My father was a pastor and wound up in prison for the things he did (and justified doing with the bible). And if he hadn't forcibly been taken out of our lives when we were little, we'd still be there. I think frequently about what that "alternate timeline" girl who was raised in the church would have been like
Brittany being absolutely FERAL 5 minutes in has done more for me today than my coffee ever could
this so so true lmfaoo
So real
Well put, absolutely
Truly MADE my morning. Me leaving the gym just hysterically laughing 😂
I’m literally laughing out loud in the middle of the gym this is insane hahahaha
“I can’t explain basic human empathy to you.” Holy shit. I needed to hear this, it puts into words something I’ve been wrestling with right now.
Ex-catholic here. Hands completely off the wheel, eyes squeezed shut, listing to Brittany. 💜
Greetings fellow ex Catholic!! Make sure to take your seatbelt off brother!
EX CATHOLICS UNITE 👊
@@AbbiZika A seatbelt? What’s that?
@@noellenorris2590 rise up ⬆️
My people!!
Listening to preachers daughter is like watching midsommar. It’s such an incredible piece of art but it is so deeply disturbing. It’s sticks to you like hot wax.
this explained it to the T!!!!
“it sticks to you like hot wax” !!!!
The cult of southern Christianity is so incredibly hard to explain unless you have experienced it. You did a better job than I’ve ever been able to. Leaving the church is so isolating. “I forgave god” gave me chills. Hats off to you for working to leave behind the resentment you feel. You’re not alone, I’m working on it too. Hard to not resent an institution and it’s followers that hate me and all the people I love.
And how it boils down to loving real people that exist over a god that nobody can even prove exists. That’s what’s so painful about it. Knowing that my family chooses to love the equivalent of an imaginary friend over real people is sobering, and that they’re doing it exclusively out of fear of being punished by that entity. It’s like it creates a rage towards god for doing that to our families.
Grew up mormon and definitely feel this!
SO REAL
@@margomagoo2836me too!!! so weird.
Yeah I can't explain it well but as someone who was raised in a mostly catholic country that's not the US (Ireland, literally all the decent schools are catholic too) even the most religious people here I've talked too can all agree that there's a certain brand of insanity that comes with American Christians, literally half the shit that goes on over there wouldn't fly here at all.
I got shivers when she said “I can’t explain basic human empathy to you” real
“I hated everyone that made me feel like I wasn’t doing things right, even though inside I was happy.” Hit me so hard, tears were immediately in my eyes. I had to go no contact with my parents and middle brother, and it’s changed/ruined relationships with other family member because they don’t get it. The intense judgement is hard to swallow. Powerful. I love listening to this woman talk.
Thank you for this comment 💗
As an ex-catholic who started to realize the problems within the church at a young age and who started to cause household issues bc of it, you already KNOW my hand are OFF the wheel and my eyes are CLOSED and I am LISTENING
You get it
real.
ME FR
Catholics are the fakest a “Christian” can get. They don’t even follow the 10 commandments and ironically have in fact changed some of them🤡 not only that but they’ve taken many books out of the Bible, totally not sus💀 I don’t suggest throwing Christianity away completely, seek the full truth, God just wants to love you he doesn’t want you to come to mass for hours or pray to statues or whatever they do lmao, he just wants you to form a personal relationship with him, Jesus is God in full form, he is the father son and spirit we accept into our life’s, this is factual tho the Catholic Church will never acknowledge it, read Isaiah 9:7- this verse is the Old Testament prophecy of Jesus birth and to no surprise it calls him both a son, father, and our prince of peace (the spirit) and if that doesn’t do it for ya it also boldly says he will be called GOD. Jesus went back to heaven with his body to reign in full form until his return. Son was metaphorical for his human form. don’t let the evil Catholic Church fool you and turn you off from Jesus completely. Seek him. I suggest looking for a Pentecostal apostolic church, they have the full truth baptize in Jesus name, speak in tongues (heavenly language given by God which is real I experience it too) you will never experience a peace and joy like this I promise, No disrespect but catholics do not have the joy of the lord, true joy. Anyone can say they are happy and content but it doesn’t compare to the fountain of living water Jesus gives daily.
So patriotic
As a straight white male from Texas, I agree with everything Brittany is saying, and it's so critical that we all fight the good fight for equality and equity. I love that she uses her platform for so much good. Trans rights are human rights!! Love you Brittany! I also grew up the same way religiously and have so much deeply rooted trauma religiously and it was so healing to hear someone share the same experience.
So if you're fighting for trans rights. Who's fighting for women's rights? Or should we erase female bathrooms, prisons, sports, scholarships, safe houses and shelters?
its so refreshing to have someone like you in the broski nation 🫶
Just scrolled down from her saying "I need dick" but yeah mood
@@alexiscake_ as stated in the town hall meeting, we're on the front lines! 😂😂❤️
@@atlastheghost7012 🥹🥹🫶🫶
"You're creating the problem and you are the sole person who can fix it" 29:52 . That *PUNCHED* me in the gut. I was born and raised in a cult and I still feel that to this day. There's like, a nagging in my head telling me that I need to repent, I need to go back, I'm doing so much sin, it feels like its impossible to escape...
But I know there's nothing wrong with how I'm living. I'm not hurting anyone, and this joy I've only gotten to feel outside of it is worth every struggle.
i hope youre doing well friend ❤ you are doing great
@sam_bernstein_ thank you
Fellow black sheep liberal of the family and wow you have really put into words what I always struggle to. The complete lack of empathy for their fellow man whilst screaming about how strong their faith is is so incredibly hypocritical and frustrating. It’s impossible to explain to these people because their level of cognitive dissonance is so high. Thanks for giving a voice to this phenomenon because I think so many more of us are experiencing it than talk about it.
exactly!! it pisses me off to no end how they preach empathy but just do not understand empathy for those who arent the exact same as them.
I have been periodically ranting about this for years. They say they love their neighbor. But if that neighbor is homeless, trans, gay, POC, an immigrant or fat then they deserved whatever tragedy befell them, or aren't deserving of basic respect. They always speak so negatively about people different from them. If they are the righteous, I will gladly go to hell.
well said
HANDS OFF THE WHEEL EYES CLOSED BAYBEEEEEE
Lol
well done 🫡
🎶 Brittany take the WheeEEeeel 🎶
As god intended
FEET ON THE DASHBOARD!!!
hands off the wheel, eyes closed, petal to the metal, in the opposite lane, drunk, sleeping, unbuckled, texting, playing cod, screaming, and ready to listen
No but for real u get it
Sammmmeeeeeee can’t wait to listen to this while swerving in all lanes
YESSSSS
Gay nb pk tapping in😂
Smoking my vape, sniffing smelling salts, seat pushed all the way back
Christian here. No idea if anyone will see this (much less Brittany), but what has been brought up throughout this video is so incredibly valuable.
35:53 in particular really, really struck me. That's what I think Christianity should be. It's also the only thing I can absolutely agree with within the Church right now. Jesus wasn't somebody that railed against marginalized communities; those were the people he spent the most time with and stood up for. He professed the love and selflessness Brittany mentioned. He directly challenged the wealthy, the powerful, and the performative, and called out hyprocrisy as he saw it. That was Jesus. A man that sacrificed everything to demonstrate love for others, and who DIRECTLY called out a lot of religious and social issues.
There is a lot of that religious hypocrisy within American Christianity, and the cultural constructs we choose to see "outsiders" through. She is so, so right on so many fundamental issues within the Church. Many of us have truly become what Jesus referred to the Pharisees as: a den of vipers, and performers. Gatekeepers of faith and love as things to be used as rewards, and not to be given generously. We do not love as we should, and we don't demonstrate what Jesus demonstrated. Even the "choosing God over family and friends." There's a huge difference between disagreement on religious and spiritual values, and holding it over those that disagree.
Anyway, Brittany... I'm really proud you brought all this up. Thank you for standing up for worthwhile topics like these. You're awesome.
me, 5 minutes in: yes. *nods vigorously*
It’s refreshing to see a Christian who can speak up and acknowledge the worst parts of your community instead of hearing criticism and taking it personally like “akshully not all Christians…”
@@leitmotif7268 I appreciate that. I do my best, though I'm definitely not perfect.
41:35 “And I hated everyone that made me feel like I wasn’t doing things right even though inside I was happy” DAMN that felt like a punch to the gut 😭 as someone who has experienced very similar things, I really appreciate the vulnerability in this episode ❤️
My Christian family still ask me all the time if I’m gay just because I advocate for the LGBTQ+ community (and happen to be single) and it breaks my heart that they can’t even fathom caring so much for a group of people that they aren’t in. It’s so frustrating trying to talk to them about it
Literally. It’s crazy that my family couldn’t fathom me caring for the LGBTQ+ community, or any community really, if I was not in it (this was before I realized I’m in the community lmao).
I feel this on a DEEP level
As an ex-christian. I got every word you said. The community aspect of religion is incredible, but for what. It’s all a guise. I’ve never felt so alone than in a church with other people.
It’s not. Jesus moves in my life, the community is cool but Jesus is what it’s all about he’s everything. He’s not hard to find either just ask
Brittany, thank you so much for sharing this. I left the Evangelical Christian church four years ago and it has been the most confusing, tumultuous, isolating years of my life. My family is also still very religious and routinely informs me I will be "spending an eternity in hell."
That sense of feeling like you're always living wrong is so real and so easily fucks with your head. I feel less alone when I hear experiences like yours. It's incredibly comforting to know I'm not alone, yet I'm sorry you've also had to endure the pain that comes with leaving your religious upbringing behind.
You speak with such eloquence and clarity. It 's hard to do that knowing family members are watching from afar. Thank you for showing up authentically and doing it with fervor. You inspire me to do the same.
Much love
I feel you, we got this 💛
pray for me (idk if that sounds ironic) because my family recently entered the evangelist church and this is TOUGH lmao
@@pinkcockroachomg how’s it going?
@@amoodyb they're hunting me because I never show up in church anymore and I've cut my hair short (it's unacceptable to them and it's symbolic to me), im busy with work now and also with rinsing myself off of the seemingly innate shame and guilt I feel all the time so I can look at people in the eyes and not see a reflection of a distorted image i see in the mirror. basically, it's been good.
@@pinkcockroach it can be so stressful when getting away from the faith and all that. I’m currently going through some stuff that has to do with that. So I feel ya. Man, it’s stressful.
I know Brittany will never see this. I’m a 43 year old gay man. I follow her because she’s fun and light, but this made me tear up. She’s such an intelligent person. Thank you Brittany for saying it better than I ever could! ❤️
love the older gays, pls share your wisdom💗
@@wateringcan5317idk if i've been around gay people too much but i immediately took this as an insult lmaooooooooo
omg the experience of your family “poking the bear” under the guise of just wanting to “learn” when really they just want an argument and another chance to try and prove you wrong is SO REAL. it drives me fuckin NUTS and then IM the bitch when i walk away from certain conversations in the name of protecting myself and keeping the peace. why do i have to be the bigger person when im 20+ years younger than the people antagonizing me?
i hear you!!!!!
LITERALLY and hearing this makes me feel better because i feel so guilty about not trying to change their vote to make them less damaging to human rights but it’s exactly “how can i teach you about human empathy”
me too! public enemy #1 here. i tried for YEARS. i let them be the bad guy, i was nice, i was nasty, i listened, i tried, i sent links, i watched things, i approached it every way you can imagine and no one fucking cares. my uncle tried to spill my fiancé’s bud light last summer (siiiiiiigh) and said fuck you to my face when i asked if he could please stop obsessing over dylan mulvaney minding her business and let us enjoy my father’s birthday dinner. my fiancé physically removed me to safety…at which point my father followed to yell at me for making a scene. i never thought id get married in a church but i always thought my family would be there. i’m bisexual. my fiancé is black. if you cannot comprehend that we and other people are full fucking human beings you have NO PLACE whatsoever in OUR family’s lives. and they instigate every time, blame me, and will continue to blame and resent people for *checks notes* understanding/caring more about human rights than they do and trying to gently ask why they dont. it’s fucking bullshit. r/qanoncasualties is a great resource but it kills me that so many of us are living this right now
“ why do i have to be the bigger person when im 20+ years younger than the people antagonizing me? “ DANNGGG that cuts right to the core.
Omfg my grandma would do this shit with my mom and I was so blind. One instance was when she, in front of everyone in Church said I wanted to be baptized when I never said anything. I would have to go to Christian, Pentecostal, and a Catholic Church when my parents were separated and it's so incredibly frustrating hearing so many different things and feeling like no matter what I do it's something wrong. And every excuse of hers was "bc God" basically. We dont talk to her anymore lmao
When she started tearing up, I sobbed, Thank you for speaking up for us , the people who are sick and tired constant contradictions in religion and how it absolutely tears you apart.
This is my first Broski Report and I get the sense this is a weird first one to watch lol. I only ever saw Brittany guesting with codyko and I never thought much of her beyond just being yet another internet comedian. But she has articulated so perfectly all of my feelings towards american christianity it's like she hopped in my head, took a look around, and shared with the world. I'm so glad I found this.
As a woman who grew up TERRIFIED of the catholic church and terrified of the religion she was born into but having to act like I cared even though I never felt connection to it I can whole heartedly say this episode captivated me. It's so comforting to hear someone I relate to say they feel similar things.
“I envy the faithful. I do.” CHILLS 😭 I loved church and the community when I was younger but now I can’t be apart of something where a majority is so hateful and ignorant. I wish i could believe it something that much but I just can’t
as a trans man who left the church of god as soon as i left tennessee, i was brought to tears by how vulnerable and personal you got this episode. keep it moving, brittany, you always bring me light when i need it most.
I hope you have an amazing, peaceful day
Oh man i was crying right along with you. Pastor's daughter and idk if it's because of the holidays too but i almost started bawling when i was shopping in target yesterday watching families walk around together.
I thought about my family and how i wish i could just agree with them on things. Life would be so much easier and i would get along with them so much better buts its just not what i believe and its created such a big ripple in my relationship with them.
You hit the nail on the head with the way they vote and talk about how some people shouldn't have basic human rights.....i had a discussion with my dad and told him if thats how christians believe i dont want any part of it and its so hard for me to put myself in this position cause I'm alone in it in my family so they all think I'm the crazy one.
Ugh and then when you talked about like of course we all felt emotional during alter calls.....and faking it.....whew. yep.
*Big hug*
I’ve been thinking about Sylvia Plath’s quote “I need a father, I need a mother, I need some older, wiser being to cry to. I talk to God but the sky is empty.” I feel like Britney just gets it, losing your faith and being closed off from your family and friends because of it is such a difficult thing to go through. I was raised in a christian school, and anytime you questioned anything you were put down, I read the bible front to back so many times and that truly made me see the faults of the church and the religion itself. seeing myself lose everyone in the final years, solely for caring for those we were taught to shun and hate, was a heartbreak that I never imagined.
Every time Brittany cries I just can't help but cry alongside her, to be so seen and heard by a person on the internet is something so serene and special. Holy shit do I love president broski.
“I can’t explain basic human empathy to you” Oof, I felt that in my SOUL because that’s truly what it boils down to. My parents lack the empathy for anyone who doesn’t have their same skin color or share their same beliefs, and to have to explain that to them is like talking to a brick wall. The understanding of empathy will never break through to them and it’s so hard and frustrating to come to terms with.
And it's so incredibly enraging cause I know if it wasn't for the church, they could experience a kinder side of humanity. I could feel comfortable with them without randomly being reminded of what beliefs have so intrinsically been put into their minds. This episode made be cry so hard esp w these comments😭
@@tymberssi relate so hard to this, the rage in feeling like religion robbed you of the parents that you once had/could’ve had and never will-it’s such a profound, lonely sense of grief that is so tinged in anger from religion literally de-empathizing the people in your life you were once close to-damn im about to cry just thinking of this, thank you for your comment, it just resonated so well with me
What hit so hard in this was the fact that as a child how grew up in Christianity, I felt that same validation that Brittany mentioned that you seeked for. Including faking it. I just wanted to feel the same great thing that I saw people felt around me. Including the evidence of it like crying, falling to your knees, passing out, and talking in tongues. Since I was young I wanted that too since kids my age would feel it. And I was so confused why I wouldn’t feel it so I’d fake it. Hearing that I wasn’t the only one hit me so hard that im tearing up now writing this.
As a pastors daughter now agnostic/atheist, I am VERY excited for this episode girl 🎉
children of pastors attendance, present and traumatized !
Your father is a pastor...damn 😭 good wishes and hugs to you fr
pastors kids are present and sat 😇
can i hear some NOISEEEE for our parents believing we’re burning for eternity for the sheer fact that we don’t declare jesus as our lord & saviour!!!!!! 🎉🎉
Souther Baptist ministers kid here 🫡 reformed and ready
“I forgave God.” Straight up fully body chills. The power and energy radiating off her this episode is aaaabsolutely making me sob/ cheer like a feral banshee.
Couldn’t have said it better myself
i went to a christian high school and went on a school trip to a worship conference on winter. it was three 9 hours days and i remember thinking on the last day “why can’t i cry? do i not love God enough? why isn’t the Holy Spirit choosing me?” it’s such a weird thing to grapple with and it was nice to hear you speak so honestly about it
so relatable, i grew up in church and all my friends and family seemed like they felt god’s presence in such a real way and i was just so confused as to why i never felt a thing, back then i just assumed it had to do with me not reading my bible or something 😭😭
The point isn’t to cry just bc, you cry bc you actually know him, and when you do know him you can’t let go. You haven’t met him you loved the idea of a god but you’ve never met him you can though
I come back to this episode all the time. I think Ethel Cains' Preachers Daughter can relate to so many groups of people; Christians/ religious followers, queer people, abused people, women, etc. In some way or another, your story is represented in this album. My mother ran away from Christian faith and an abusive Christian family. She raised me without religion, but because she lost hers, i witnessed, and in so, suffered the pain of my mother that Brittany describes in this episode. I sob every time i watch it, but it's so comforting. Brittany's vulnerability is so reassuring. This woman deserves the world!
“im so happy to be alive!" cue me full on sobbing. that sentiment is so easy to forget. when everything in my life is shrouded by terrible things, i am still here and i can and do find joy, even if in small moments and that makes it so worth it.
As an actual preachers daughter I appreciated this episode sooo much and I can't wait to check out Ethel Cain and cry my eyes out.
mood
Oh girl Ethel Cain makes me EMOTIONAL
Fellow preacher's daughter here- had no idea the cry I was in for. Hope it was cathartic 😅
Girl me too
As a fellow preacher’s daughter who just finished crying while listening to Ethel Cain, I hope the experience is as cathartic for you as it was for me lmao
As an ex-southern Christian I’m so grateful and happy to listen to another person’s experience of religion and how it traumatized them. Religion isolates you from the outside world as a tactic to keep you from learning other ideologies, but seeing Brittany talk about the exact same trauma helps me not feel so alone. Thank you queen 😍😍
It’s so funny the ad just before this video was for Mark Wahlburgs Christian Hallow prayer app. I’m listening to this on the depressing drive home from saying goodbye for what will probably be the last time to my sweet, precious great grandmother. There’s just something about hearing Brittany froth at the mouth over Ghost cosplayer hog that’s so comforting rn. It’s what Mema would have wanted. Thank you Brittany.
As a preachers daughter, I know your pain and grief. I am about to be 33 and I'm still working through things in therapy that I learned when I was young. It feels validating to know I'm not alone ❤
this was a very awakening episode for me. you spoke things i couldn’t put words to and now i feel like that weight is gone. “i can’t explain basic human empathy to you”
this is my fave podcast
i grew up mormon and this episode hit so hard. brittany is so eloquent, she perfectly encapsulates what it’s like to grow up christian and feeling the weight of religious trauma !!
Me too dude, growing up Mormon it takes years to deconstruct that shit
How to you know someone is exmormon? Don't worry they'll tell you. Jkjk I'm here too!!! We're everywhere bitches!!!!!
mormonism is full of misogyny, covert abuse, and belittling women.
@@h.r.9563literally. Omfg growing up Mormon was rough
Yes 👏
We share a very special religious trauma bond 😅😭
I was sooooo determined to not cry on my birthday and here I am. Sobbing. Thank you Brittany you’re a gift to us all
Happy late birthday :)
This was THE most dynamic episode far and thats saying something 😭😭😭
Going feral -> crying about religious trauma -> going feral was WILD i love her sm 😭😭
I was today years old when i learned that Brittany could do an immaculate spot on Trump impression
LMFAO I WAS CRYING OH MY GOD I CANT BREATHEEEEEEEEEEEEE❤❤❤
President brittany gives us everything in one episode. Widsom. Humor. Sociology. Arthistory. Glam. Raw emotions and dick jokes. Salute
🫡
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This episode literally touched a part of my brain in a way that no conversation I’ve had with anyone in my life about how growing up in a household that chose religion over basic human decency and respect that I could never explain. Thank you ❤
I left the church last year, and my whole family and 79% of Oklahoma are Christian; it's so isolating. I appreciate how vulnerable you are about it, and your words make me feel seen and validated for leaving the church.
religiously traumatized okie here, that percentage makes so much sense, i haven’t officially left the church (mentally i have) but i see you girl
I feel for you, not that I lived here my whole life but I just moved to OK w my Christian mom and it’s isolating for sure
Fellow oklahoman here who has left the state- the isolation i felt from family, friends, peers, teachers etc was unbearable. But there is better out there!
Omg okie living in texas here! This is so real. The isolation is so insanely hard to deal with.
As an ex -christian and trans woman, Preachers Daughter is such a visceral and hauntingly real depiction of what sort of isolation organized religion can bring over you. How quickly I lost my family after coming out was horrible, and the feeling of walking around as the 'black sheep' of the family for being different, and there opposition to your existence and the existence and thriving of others as some sort of political stance is so draining. Learning Ethel was trans as well, the lyrics to the intro song are so powerful and resonate a lot with personally. 😢
I lost family after coming out as trans too :(
i hope all of you find peace and happiness im sorry that happened to u
@@forgetmenotfaery
It’s so stupid that people feel like they can just disagree with the existence of queer and trans people. Our existence was not political until they made it political.
I just got Ethel Cain’s lyrics tattooed on my arm, “I forgive it all as it comes back to me”. I’ve been through so much in my life and I feel like it just really resonated with me, it’s my most treasured tattoo now. I’m sooo happy Brittany talked about this aaaaaa
i just got god loves u but not enough to save u tattooed! also the same as above so below hands on my thighs as here
Ahhh recently got I am the face of love’s rage
40:00 I think it's really, really powerful you went through this. I was raised with an agnostic mother and an atheist father and I never had to grieve what happened to me after I died or that I was somehow living wrong in the eyes of God. Not really, anyway. As someone that has seen Christians lose their faith and adopt a different world view in their 20s, the fear and the grief is real. To come out of it on the other side with love in your heart is a fucking challenge and triumph and I don't think that should be understated. I felt jealous of others' faith and the positive side of church, (the community, the sharing of emotion). It does contain really beautiful things. Thank you so much for sharing that. I bet a lot of people feel close to you in what you've been through too. There's still magic in the world, in art, in music, and in being human. I find my spiritual side coming through there too.
My eyes are closed and Jesus has FULLY taken the wheel. As someone who is the liberal, progressive black sheep of her family in a rural Catholic upbringing, it's been a journey to really develop a healthy, beautiful relationship with faith that's independent from the religious structures I was baptized into... Thank you always, girl, for being vulnerable and real and honest. Giving you virtual hugs. The Broski nation comments are a manifestation space, so putting it into the universe now that you will get that good Ghost hog. Loving you, Brittany!
I appreciate Brittany for being so honest and vulnerable with us. I hope she knows how beautiful, compassionate and wise her outlook on life is. Her following her true beliefs and being critical about what was taught is amazing, she's amazing.
i’m super late but just a tidbit about the track “hard times”- it’s not only about ethel feeling the pressure of her father’s faith and status as a preacher after his death, but also her ongoing trauma from her experiencing CSA from him in her young childhood :( the lines “in the corner on my birthday you watched me/ dancing right there in the grass/ i was too young to notice/ that some types of love can be bad” and “nine going on eighteen, lay it on me” and the repetition of “please, can i sleep?” in the outro are especially tied to this. i believe she even ties both of these ideas back in “american teenager” when she says “and i feel you there/ in the middle of the night when the lights go out/ but im all alone out here” and these little details make me fucking insane about this album 🤗💔
i love your interpretation of the feeling that you can’t get away from the guilt of christianity long after you leave the church tho!! i’ve never thought about that aspect of it before.
Btw for anyone who doesn't know, she said its not actually based on her own experience of SA as a child or anything, it's the character's. Just so no one gets confused.
This weekly podcast is the only thing so far that has successfully filled the void that the Jenna and Julien podcast had left me with
literally this is the only podcast that does it for me like J&J did 😭
YES
REAL
It's all there, you're right! enormous sympathy for humans and goofiness like Jenna's, kindness and the most random wild jokes like Julien's
period
Brittany, I genuinely don't know if you'll see this gurl but I am writing this from the other side of the Earth, formerly engulfed within an equally toxic Abrahamic religion, and I am re-learning, trying to re-wire my brain, and although we lived such different lives, your experience resonates with me on a different level. I don't know you, but I love you. And I am so proud of you and of me and of all the women alike. And yes, I also did cry during Barbie. We are of two different languages, different religions, different histories and ethnicities; yet the misogyny and religious trauma we lived through unites us. Blessed be the feminine love. 💋 ILY babe.
Blessed be the feminine love 🌹
Blessed be the feminine love
Blessed be the feminine love !! 💖
It's rare to have young creators talk about something that you relate to on such a deep and personal level like religious trauma - specifically American Evangelism. And to strike a chord within you, talking so openly about their experiences and their family.. The respect I have for this woman, just being herself online and really baring her soul. With the many silly moments, she's not afraid to dive into these topics. You have a way of speaking that is so genuine and heartfelt; I got emotional from this episode. I think it's become one of my favorites.
perfectly said! I’ve seen Brittany in her viral videos and she is absolutely hilarious, but to see her vulnerability and how you explained her “barring her soul”, it was like a breath of fresh air to hear from an “influencer” or someone I just see online. It felt very genuine and real to hear her perspectives and it was very moving.
I left the church after my first miscarriage. Preachers, family, friends all they could say was “we don’t understand God’s plan” “it’s just gods plan” gods plan was to take my baby? I couldn’t accept that. Along with everything else of course. And I spent so long hating the religion and hating god. I’ve finally after years of resentment come to peace with it all. I’ve come to peace with being out of the religion and my family continuing to accept “gods plan”. Thank you for this Brittany. It’s tough to be in the south as an atheist/agnostic.
Sorry that happened to you, and that people said such unintentionally hurtful things to you then. As someone who was raised atheist, ppl thinking I would find more comfort if I stopped believing there's horrible accidents and unfortunate circumstances, and instead believe that there was a god out there putting me through it, has always been mindboggling to me.
Brittany being self-aware of how feral she's becoming for men online is so relatable, thank you for speaking up for us thirsty gwrls
I’m a Pastor’s kid… now agnostic/atheist. I have never had someone speak SO accurately to the trauma of leaving the church in a religious family and all the unlearning that has to be done. ❤
Girl I was raised Pentecostal and you hit it dead on the nail. If you didn’t speak in tongues you weren’t “filled with the Holy Ghost” I tried so hard to be “filled” and just gave up and started speaking gibberish and the way I got so much more respect afterwards was so isolating because I knew I lied.
grew up in a Pentecostal church and i never had the feeling to raise my hands durring worship or speak in tongues, and i was waiting for that moment that i would feel the “holy spirit” in that way, i used to lift my hands occasionally but that “holy spirit” feeling really never came
I had a similar experience with faking speaking tongues in my youth group. Then later told my mom that I did it thinking I’d also get praise from her (which I craved so badly) since she was also very religious and she flipped out on me and said I’m going to hell for speaking in tongues so the confusion i felt from being told by two different sides what is right and wrong was so confusing when I was just trying to feel something
I listened to this episode on the way to work this morning and cried the whole way there. Started out as sad tears when she talked about her childhood and the times she wishes could of been spent on other things instead of being in the church(because I can relate to that) and then very joyful tears when she started speaking on now being so happy to be alive (because I can also relate to that). This episode was so nice to listen to knowing my experience growing up in the church wasn’t singular to me.
"All we really have is each other" This resonates so much with me, as a person who became agnostic after being raised Catholic. It's so hard for me to comprehend that so many people are only selfless in order to get a good spot in heaven. A place that may not even exist. No one is kind just to be kind. If you are a good and thoughtful person all your life, but God sends you to hell for not believing in him, that's not a God I would want.
That also really resonated with me. All my life I always asked my family “ if a person is a good person their whole life, helping and uplifting people, they’re gonna go to hell simply because they don’t believe in god? And people who claim to be godly people yet treat people as nothing but vermin will go to heaven because they went to church every Sunday?” They’d look at me quite puzzled and say “ well if you don’t accept Jesus as your one true savior…”blah blah I’m sure you know the rest. It always made me feel uneasy even to this day.
This! We should want to be good for our own progression! To raise a better generation! It’s unfortunate how the message has been so mixed up.
👏 👏
God does that simply because you have the ability to have free will. He is giving you free will in this world therefore he is giving you the choice to believe in him. If you don't that's okay since you have that right, but if you don't believe in him why would he force you to be with him in heaven? That would be going against your free will.
@@aaronlord5066 Honestly I totally understand what you mean by this question it can be a very hard one to answer. I would look into it more and research it but here's my Christian opinion on this. We are all sinful beings period. In Christianity, sin isn't measured as one is worse than the other. It can be a hard thing to grasp, trust me I get it completely. A person can not be a "good person their whole life" In Christianity it doesn't work like that. We are all deemed sinful, hence why Jesus Christ died on the cross for OUR sins so we could be forgiven and reunite with him in heaven. God gives us a choice, hence why we have free will. He doesn't force us to believe in him, he wants us to come to him on our own. And we have that choice to or not to, due to our free will. If God gives us free will to follow him in this world, we can follow him to heaven because we made that choice to be with him. If you don't choose to walk with God and have a relationship with him, why would he force you to go to heaven and be with him for eternity? That goes against our free will, plus that would kinda suck to be trapped with someone you never wanted anything to do with right? Why would u want to go to heaven when you don't even believe in it. Or if you don't walk with God through pain and suffering on earth to deserve to be in heaven? The second type of person is a prime example of how we are all sinners, although we all are sinners God teaches us to hate the sin but love the sinner. We don't go to heaven just because we go to church every Sunday or follow the 10 commandments. That is just strictly religion, a continuous routine with no true connection. Jesus Christ tells us in the bible how he dislikes the concept of religion. The Pharisees were religious and Jesus didn't like that, due to various reasons. All they did was follow strict rules like a ritual. God wants us to have a relationship with him, not a religion. Those 2 things are vastly different. Christianity is known for being very forgiving. No matter the sin if you ask for forgiveness truly wholeheartedly God will forgive you and you will ascend to heaven when you pass. It can be hard to understand how someone so awful can repent and go to heaven, trust me I get that. But that's why Jesus Christ died was so he could take OUR sins and allow us to be forgiven, no matter the sin. And that all goes back to how a sin isn't worse or better then any other in God's eyes because we are all the same and all are sinful. That is why Christianity is not to judge one and other because we all are the same in God's image. Also I wanted to say intent matters definitely. If someone says their Christian, go to church every Sunday, but treat everyone with disrespect it makes them hypocritical and very sinful. It shows the person's character. But as a Christian I have to understand I am not better then anyone else due to my nature of making mistakes or slipping up and treating people poorly at times, which I'm sure we all have been like that at some point and God knows that. So if we learn our wrongs and understand them and ask for forgiveness God will forgive us. I hope this made sense sorry I went on such a long explanation. Ive just been in your shoes before and I would've loved someone to explain this to me in a way that made some sort of sense. I also wanna apologize for the things that the other Christians have said, some can be very forceful and disrespectful. Not all of us are :). Hope this helped!!
I am actually so thankful for how she graphically went in on Ethel Cain!!!!! Ethel deserves SO much praise and attention for her masterpieces, truly. She is beyond incredible and I'm so glad to see her get visibility. Thank you for making this omg you BEAUTIFULLY explained your own struggles and I could relate so much.
oh my god icon cousin… hai :]
i relate heavily to faking spiritual experiences in the name of holding onto connections with others. the more you spoke- about family poking fun at you, about the hypocrisy of the individualistic nature of american christians- the more i cried. thank you for putting everything i’ve felt into words. i’ve never heard my inner feelings so well laid out in language. thank you thank you thank you.
Yes!! I pretended too. Now I look back and see how crazy that was. All for the pastor's grandson. I was head over heels for that boy. 😅😂
this episode (after to hog talk) had me truly thinking and feeling so vulnerable. thank you for speaking on this.
brittany casually started talking about music again after spilling the realest and most emotional speech as if it were an art with such emotion and passion
44:09, being at Pride events make me feel how you are describing. I so deeply resonate with needing that sense of community. There is something so profound about being united with complete strangers through something so deep and personal that you all share. It is a “larger than life” but comforting feeling to look around a room not knowing anyone but on some level, *knowing* them.
I hope you find community filled with positive and supportive relationships. I hope you experience that feeling again.
Yes I went to my first pride 2 years ago and I cried so much during one of the drag queens performances.
I was baptized twice and saved four times at friend’s churches where people didn’t know me, and each and every time I assumed I wasn’t doing something right because I never felt “It.” Still haven’t, and now I know that’s okay. Thanks for being so open, Brittany
You have such a way of making me cry with laughter then cry actual tears. So much humor, knowledge, passion, etc. When you spoke on Christianity and religion, you spoke to my SOUL, girl!! I agree with you so deeply. I always felt so out of place at church, youth group functions, and so on. Faking it and feeling uncomfortable. I only enjoyed church and youth group so i could hang with my friends. I was always forced to go to church, attend youth group, etc. The fear and guilt based practices are abhorrent. When you said that music theory folks talk about the chords of worship songs being intentional and another form of manipulation, it blew my mind. It makes SO much sense! The severity of manipulation and gaslighting religion performs is disgusting. I have low-level PTSD from religion and all that. I'm 42, and I only found a spirituality that makes me feel good, comfortable, and true joy. I connect to the universe and nature, and I don't have to feel guilty or have to fake it.
When you said music is like spirituality, you're absolutely right. Music can connect to my soul more than perhaps anything else. My BFF and I went to a concert with our favorite band a yr or 2 ago. We have seen them so many times. The lead singer, the band, and the lyrics are just incredible. They stand up against bullying, promote mental health awareness, and suicide prevention. Their set lasted 2 full hours, and I've never felt more spiritually cleansed in my life. It had nothing to do w religion or god, just pure compassion, empathy, and goodness. I told my BFF that this concert was my church, and the lead singer was the pastor. I've never ever in my life felt that way in a church or church-related. The church and religion itself made me so scared, paranoid, guilty, and all the worst feelings. The god they pushed on me at such a young age made me rebel against "god." Now, I feel like the universe is looking out for me. I tell the moon my sorrows and secrets. I recharge with the sun. I would rather spend every minute in nature, surrounded by flora and fauna than literally any person. Anyway...guess I needed to get this off my chest, as well. Thank you for your vulnerability, it makes me feel more seen and heard than most. You get it. Thank you. ❤
The emotional rollercoaster. From cosplay hog to humanity and religion. As a queer person it pains me to see this culture war play out in front of me under the guise of morality via religion. Thank you Brittany.
as someone who was raised religiously and who feels like the “black sheep” of the family, this video was so healing. i really and truly appreciate when brittany talks about genuine, serious things like religious trauma because it makes me feel less alone. thanks madam president❤
I'm currently healing my inner teenager by finally allowing myself to crush on fictional characters, so you being so unapologetic about it is really reassuring and therapeutic
Same here! I'm so glad you are on the road to healing. Ugh, this was so cathartic.
Brittany,
I don’t know if you’ll see this. But if you do, thank you for being you. I’ve watched you here and there throughout the years and have been binging you during H3’s break and stumbled upon this episode.
I’ve been through a lot in 25 years. And I think a lot of it is tied to religious trauma. You speaking on this made me tear up because it’s really difficult finding people who can reach your soul and speak the words you can’t find. Thank you for being so open and honest about everything. You make me laugh until I’m tearing up, but you’re also so genuine and warm that it makes me tear up. You’re a true voice for those of us who do not have much of one.
Signed a fan from a small town in Tennessee awaiting the day I can escape to a better place❤️
Brittney. I can’t find the words to properly share the appreciation I have for you. I’m currently a “spiritual” southerner who is left leaning, however I have not always been that way. To watch someone who is well known and well established that can so beautifully articulate the hardships of our shared upbringing is so comforting and validating. From a Bitter Southerner, Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
“Crying, sobbing, imitating caged monkeys, yearning for COD cosplay ween.” “That was unexpected”
Girl, we expect it every time. And I love it.
I grew up in a family that isn't religious at all and so I don't understand but it's so strange how people lose all empathy and kindness for those who find comfort in other religions/spirituality, it's really jarring to hear people talk about their traumas with religion. Thank you for this episode brittany❤
I honestly envy people who grew up in a sort of neutral house when it comes to religion because man the feeling of getting older and for the first time seeing your beliefs from an unbiased perspective and suddenly realizing the huge possibility that none of it is real, suddenly having everything you’ve ever known about life and death and your purpose and your existence and your identity and everything just ripped away. It’s so scary. I just kinda wish I had the oppertunity to grow up in an environment where I could decide those things for myself and be able to see the different perspective and possibilities so it wouldn’t slam me in the face one day as a teenager. All I know is I’m doing a lot of reconstruction, and I’m not sure if It will lead me back to Christianity or it will lead somehwere else. All I know is I want to believe in what I believe in because that’s what I genuinely think is right and not just cuz it’s been indoctrinated into me yk
@@brooke4608 I wish you the best in your journey, my friend✨️
My mother stayed in their room for about a decade because they were afraid of the rapture. Everything was symbolized as evil or unholy. When I came out to my mother as gay, she she would say and still to this day, “ it’s not my place to tell you how to live your life. God told me to love you regardless.”
I’m 19 and went to a Catholic School for six years of my life. As a kid, it fucks your mind up. It truly does and there are some nasty people who are saying that they are “Christ-Like” unfortunately. Brittany, your words spoke to me and I felt them all in my bones. You truly are a gift to this world. Thank you for the content and words you speak❤️🩹