How to start changing your relationship with your body for the better ft Laura Kelly | Episode 40
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 11 มิ.ย. 2024
- You may have heard of body acceptance, but have you ever heard the term body neutrality? Today we dive into body acceptance with our first guest! We are so excited to welcome Laura Kelly to the podcast! Laura Kelly offers mindset & self-acceptance coaching for the open-hearted soul on a journey of self discovery. The work of stepping into a life of more joy, deeper fulfillment, kinder self-talk, less pressure, and a clearer purpose is better with a teammate. Laura is the host of You Might Not Like It, a podcast that cuts deep to the raw, real, and challenging work of showing up to your purpose. It’s a compassionate place for you to land, whether you’re celebrating your latest win or deep in the challenges of being in the messy middle.
You can join the free body acceptance program (delivered right to your inbox!) where we'll start at the very beginning before going deep on topics like body neutrality, food freedom, the stuff your Mom said, and the comments that left scars.
www.laurakelly.co/bodyacceptance
Other links:
Website: www.laurakelly.co
Instagram: / laurakelly.co
Tiktok: / laurakellyco
Email: hello@laurakelly.co
Chapters
00:00 Introduction and Different Approach to Body Acceptance
06:11 Laura Kelly's Background and Journey
10:45 Starting the Process of Changing the Relationship with the Body
15:21 Body Neutrality and Body Acceptance
18:16 Changing Negative Thoughts and Introducing Positive Thoughts
22:04 Expanding the Definition of Body Acceptance
25:06 Letting Go of Control and Tuning into Body Cues
28:36 Being Present and Building a Healthier Relationship with Clothing
38:29 The Evolution of the Closet
39:25 The Struggle of Body Changes and Mindful Shopping
40:22 The Importance of Mindset and Intentionality in Shopping
41:03 The Connection Between Body Acceptance and Underwear
42:01 Building a Positive Relationship with Style and Clothing
42:57 Mirror Work and Body Neutrality
44:25 Taking Small Steps Towards Body Acceptance
46:15 Separating Morality from Body Image
48:16 The Influence of Society and Media on Body Image
50:52 Changing the Perception of Self-Worth
53:23 The Journey of Body Acceptance
55:56 Tuning into Your Body's Voice
59:51 The Power of Positive Self-Talk
CONTACT US: sustainthispodcast@gmail.com
SIGNE HANSEN
TH-cam: / @useless_dk
Website: www.uselesswardrobe.dk/
IG: / useless_dk
TT: / useless_wardrobe
CHRISTINA MYCHAS
TH-cam: / @christinamychas
Website: www.minimalist-ish.com/
IG: / christina.mychas
TT: / christina.mychas
ALYSSA BELTEMPO
TH-cam: / @alyssabeltempo
Website: msbeltempo.com/
IG: / msbeltempo
TT: / msbeltempo
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Thanks for this episode! I lost 100 pounds and then got told repeatedly that my face looked old, I needed to gain weight, etc etc. It proves that you have to live for honoring what feels good to you and tune out all external noise. I love how Laura said your body wants to be decorated. ❤️
Hi friends! This is a reupload as I accidentally uploaded the raw recording of the podcast 😅 - please enjoy Laura’s insights and how you can transform your relationship with your body & yourself. We learned a lot from her!!
It was good the first time. 🤩
I thought I missed it, hahhahaa watched the first version for a few minutes, looked for it again wasn't there hahahahah😅 I'm glad I can watch it ❤❤❤ so wholesome
Body acceptance has been huge for me after being diagnosed with breast cancer and undergoing a bilateral mastectomy without reconstructive surgery- aka going flat. Clothes fit differently now, so I have to take certain things into account. Of course there is also the need to accept (and honor, appreciate, value) my scars. Someone once asked me if I was angry with my body for getting cancer. I said, “No. I feel empathy for my body and appreciate it even more.” I try to feel that way every day. Thank you for this amazing conversation. ❤❤❤❤
Same for me, bilateral mastectomy 7 weeks ago. I totally accept my new normal. I have been shocked, though, at some comments other women have made about my choice to remain flat. Especially my physiotherapist recently! I'm a registered nurse, and I have never and will never be so thoughtless to any of my patients. I've learned so many life lessons over the past 6 months. I am a better person for all of this. I hope you're doing really well 💗 from Australia
Laura, so well-spoken and thoughtful. People treat us as less-than if that is their thought bubble, so even if we’re able to change our own self criticisms, we can’t change their criticisms of us, and therefore their acceptance is still conditional and on some level, abusive.
Thank you so much for talking about this struggle. Incredible respect for all of you, please don’t stop!
Hi ladies, it's not like I think it's not important to have a good relationship with our bodies, it's just sometimes Lauren spoke in very long sentences so it was kind of hard to keep focus. So maybe if the podcast was based on more specific questions and more simple answers, it would be easier to keep track.
Otherwise I feel you Signe with getting wrinkles and on my side grey hair here and there (I am 36 now), my face dropping a little, well these are only signs of having the privilege of the life that I have, smiling a lot and having trouble that I sometimes managed to overcome and sometimes not. We should all be grateful (right Alyssa? 😆) for every day that we get to laugh and frown and just be here ✌️
i am a bit lost during the intro
This is an important message and podcast. Thank you so much for creating this.
This is so refreshing to hear! Love that you guys are hitting all aspects of our girl power!
Thank you so much for this episode! And inviting Laura, incredibly helpful.
Love the podcast! ❤
I'm so glad that I found this podcast. I am interested in fashion, style and feeling my best. But I no longer watch videos on "how to put your body back into the hourglass shape" or "how to look more attractive" (to who, exactly?) I want to feel stylish, confident and comfortable, and that has less to do with trying to convince someone else that I have a certain shape or size. Thank you!
that is such a great shift to make with the content you’re consuming! stylish, confident, and comfortable - this is 👌👌👌
So sorry to hear about your health struggles last year, Alyssa. I’m happy that you are in a better headspace now!
Great thoughts! We have one body to take us through life, it’s our duty to take care of it , love and appreciate it ❤
I love your podcast. I listen to episodes repeatedly. But this one… I got kind of tired of the monologue 🙈
Wow, I’m like 5min in and I know what you’re staying, I’m already fast forwarding through her monologue. I don’t think I can watch this. A 6-min answer right off that bat???? 😳
SO MUCH LOVE FOR YOU LADIES AND ALL THE POSITIVE ENERGY AND INFORMATION YOU SHARE WITH US!!! HUGS HUGS HUGS!!!
I think that this conversation is really important, regardless of the conversation style. I can relate to a lot of what Laura shared, and I hope the message keeps on being shared!
On a given day, I transition between the 'pit stop' of body neutrality and the desired state of body acceptance. I have been working to turn down the negative thoughts to focus on being grateful. Being grateful for having a body in the first place, for the strength my body showed when bringing a child into the world. Some days I quiet the negative thoughts a lot, sometimes a little, but gratitude always grounds me ❤
I’ve always joked that I have reverse body dysmorphia because through changes over time-weight gain or loss, pregnancy, stretch marks, sags, skin changes-I’ve always thought I looked sort of fine, cute even. (But I STILL was thinking about what my body looked like). Since menopause my body has changed more than at any other time, even more than during pregnancy because I realized that change was temporary. With menopause I felt like my body suddenly betrayed me in a multitude of ways. It is taking conscious decision making to allow myself to buy clothes that fit this different size and shape and to decide that my body doesn’t get to decide how much fun, contentment, joy, or life I experience. It’s ongoing. So an emphatic yes to decorating myself how I want to each day. I am in awe that you can see this now when you are all 20+’years younger than I am. You are SO far ahead of the game. ❤
Can you have Hannah Louise Poston as a guest???❤❤❤
I second your suggestion. I’ve had the same thought myself. ❤
I've always been about body neutrality. Self love/body acceptance feels like a lot of pressure. I love clothes but neutrality allows me to look in the mirror, do I like my outfit, am I covered in dog hair (better fix that) and walk away from the mirror and move forward with my day.
Love this episode. Makes me more mindful of embracing my body.❤
I loved this episode so much! Thank you all!
I love this conversation. I work as a medical massage therapist and have seen so many people, mostly women, who clearly really struggle to see their beauty. I went through some of this myself and have healed a lot in that respect alongside physical healing-while learning how to work with my body to be well. For over fifteen years I was chronically unwell and in pain. Being where I am now, specializing in work with the kinds of things that plagued me-migraines and chronic headaches, hypermobility, and chronic pain and illness, I’d love to see the body acceptance conversation deepen in the ways that it did for me. Our diversity is profoundly communicative. Our bodies say SO MUCH through our form, proportions, tendencies with respect to health challenges… so many other attributes- about how to take care of them well. I can read more and more of it the longer I work with special groups, and any reservations I once had about accepting my own body fall away replaced with awe and fascination with our diversity and with the whole language that is here to be read. If you ever want to have a conversation about that, let me in!
I watch a number of youtubers who promote clothing and brands. I laugh out loud when they try to convince me what I should wear in my house so that I can answer the door. There is this supposition that I should always camera ready or something. The message is clear, I am not enough, even sitting alone in my own home.
You can always try to do better but obviously it's your choice. I find that when I dress I feel better, more confident and i demand more respect. And you might think nobody sees that you're well dressed, but they do, even if it's just a delivery person or a neighbour you don't like (they'll be wondering why you look so great!)
@@luluandmeow do you ever contemplate how much extra time and stress all this extra planning and prepping takes from your life just to be ready for anyone's appraising glace? When my husband gets up in the morning (for day at home) he cleans himself, puts on comfortable weather appropriate clothing, and the only cosmetic thing he does is shave his face. He doesn't have to worry that he will only be shown respect if his clothing meets the expectations of delivery person.
@@danamatsukawa4762 You're in the majority. Most people don't care about what they look like and just wear whatever's comfiest 24/7.
Wow. That was so exhausting to listen to. I now realise that I have enjoyed your podcasts so much because the three of you are so considerate to each other, you take it slow, and give room to each others thoughts and opinions, you ask questions, and then listen, without pushing your own agendas. This guest talked and talked and talked and did not leave any room for a real conversation. I am so sorry foryiu guys. She was incredibly rude by doing this to you.
Omg she talks nonstop…. I don’t think I can watch this one. Sheesh!!
I love your podcast. This monologue episod is not your type of content…. May be if there was a script or anything …. For me it sounded more like a commercial for her channel.
Even though there were moments where my focus dipped out of the conversation, or where I had to rewind and listen again, this episode was really informative and interesting! Body neutrality.... I definitely like how that term sounds. It's less "in your face" than the whole body positivity thing that was once preached about. It makes the journey all that more real, raw and intrinsic- and listening to my intuition is something that I'm trying to get better at now 😊
I listened to the podcast on Spotify and as a person with latent autoimmune diabetes with adult onset, I was put off by the attitude I perceived about tracking carbohydrates. I have to track my carb intake like it's a religion. It's part of my health care and managing my condition, and yes, this changed my relationship to foods that were more likely to raise my blood sugar. I do think of them as "bad" - for my condition. I can make better choices that make it easier to manage my blood sugar. It might not have been Laura's journey, but it is mine and It's okay. My body's told me what it needs, and what it needs is medications (plural) and low carb, high fiber, low glycemic index, whole grain, etc. etc.
I had biliary bypass surgery twice, first in 2019 and 16 months later in 2020. Now missing some of my gut anatomy and my gastrointestinal system is connected very differently from a normal person. Was diagnosed at the same time, at 53, with a very rare liver disease, subsequent chronic kidney disease, and live with chronic pain.
I accept that everyone’s needs and journey is different.
Different is okay because every person’s journey is their own.
I’ve accepted my journey and that my needs and what I can or can’t tolerate are different from most people. I do what works for me.
Thank you for another great episode!
53:45 Interesting last question Christina and an interesting answer from your guest. For me it all comes down to self-esteem and self-confidence. I printed a small text that I placed in a nice frame in my closet 'You are not fully dressed until you wear a smile'. To remind me to be kind to myself and my body and that my smile (a real one) will reflect on others. I look better that way too, by the way. And I always smile at myself when I look in the mirror. :-)
Thank you. That is all.
I was looking forward to the weekly podcast/video and, to be honest, was a little disappointed this week. I'm sure Laura has a lot of valuable insight on the body image topic, but what I tune into this channel for is to hear the insight you three ladies share on the topic of sustainable fashion and, more than that, your individual as well as collective contributions and the wonderful dynamic between the three of you. Laura would do well having her own podcast (if she doesn't already) that those who seek her type of content would enjoy. Tuning into one's beloved podcast only to have a guest do 90% of the talking is a bit of a letdown. I'm sure not everyone shares my view but I'm just putting it out there, FWIW. I look forward to next week's video! ❤
Maybe respecting one’s body and trying to live sustainability are more connected than we think. If we value our bodies, perhaps we’re more willing to think about what kinds of fabrics/clothes we put on them. 🙂
I felt the same way. I wish that the guest had given the hosts space to contribute. Seeing people getting talked at, regardless of how interesting or needed the discussion is, isn't enjoyable. Also just skeptical of any type of coach or support person that approaches a conversation in that way 😅
I enjoyed the podcast and appreciate what Laura shared. In the past I was buying the clothes that influencers told me I needed in order to have a ‘perfect’ capsule wardrobe and/or in order to have ‘trendy clothes’ and look good in them. When trying each purchase on I would typically be disappointed that they didn’t look as good on me no matter how many styling tricks or tips I used. Part of the reason I kept purchasing new clothes was the ‘hope’ that perhaps this time, this wardrobe piece would be the answer and look good on me. Listening to Laura share her and others experiences is helpful, and I feel, in the long run will be helpful in building a truly sustainable wardrobe and living life to the fullest from within ‘this’ body.
I think it’s important also to be aware that this video IS edited to flow the way it does. I think our hosts wanted us to hear Laura more than themselves. I also think many future episodes will refer back to this video and continue making connections.
Same thoughts. I'm not hating but I really felt like they did not have control over this episode. 😅 Anyway it's their first guest so it's fine
Love your work ladies! I follow all of you but found Alyssa first 1.5 years ago when planning my 1-month travel capsule for Italy. I have learnt so much and have developed my personal style with your guidance.
This topic really hit home. I’m typically 1 size up and 5+cm shorter than a classic fashion (not runway) model but had trouble styling and feeling good in my clothes due to having smaller breasts and feeling stocky and thick. I’d spent many years thinking if I was just a bit skinnier My butt and thighs would match my upper body and then clothes would look great on me. After a long fitness journey, my size didn’t change but I was able to shape and sculpt great legs, but was even flatter chested and bras became even more uncomfortable (pec muscles are not round at the bottom!). Last year as a 39yo I made the choice to get breast augmentation (B-D cup), and, for me, it’s helped me feel I’m more balanced and most clothes look great now, and bras are actually comfortable. While I struggle with the fact I gave into aligning myself with beauty norms, i still couldn’t be happier with the results. I wanted to share as I know you’ve tackled injectables and ageing as topics before, and I’d be curious how you approach cosmetic surgery as a topic, and how this draws on some of the concepts of this podcast.
Again, thank you ladies!! Love your work and how you’ve impacted me and my style. Keep up the work ❤❤❤
15 min and still just a very loooooong monolog, hope it will change from a lecture to a more dynamic discussion.....
No it did not change....still a monolog, my body can't take this! Have a super day everyone XOXO
🤓☕🥐
What’s happening to your face ?? Time nastiest 4 letter word there is. lol. I’m 62 plus size and have chronic pain, diabetes. I’ve used sunblock since mid 20’s and look pretty darn good for 62 and I know that my physical me is not the real me accepted my body 10 plus years ago. Accepted my many limitations too I have had to adapt to my physical limitations and find ways to keep going by other creative endeavors. I love fashion and thrift/upcycle clothes and always feel good in my eclectic whimsical and comfortable creative outfits. I found these multicolored striped leggings at thrift store and love wearing around house with sweater or sweatshirt. My husband thinks I’m crazy but they make me feel happy and so comfy when sewing. My grandkids are going to call me their eccentric grandma and I’m proud. I don’t go crazy in my style but I think it’s fun and actually young. I had black bootcut jeans a Betsy Johnson baby doll mid thigh tunic with skulls on it with a upcycled cropped denim slim fit jacket and boots. The young twenty something woman at work complimented me and said my outfit made me look younger. This is actually one of my favorite outfit formulas. It’s a bit weird but works on my body and is way fun
I stopped listening to this episode because the speed of talking of Laura Kelly made it uncomfortable to listen. Wat to fast.
I don’t like this guest. She talks way too long and doesn’t allow a full conversation. It’s just a monologue. 😣
Ohhh can't wait to dive into this! 🩷