NRM How Do We Decide What To Keep

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 13 ก.ย. 2023
  • Recently I found myself in a decisive moment. It wasn't earth shattering. But it was time to decide between philosophies: keep my design aesthetic (which I enjoyed) or create a larger space for my soul to find freedom to breathe. Not every situation will come to the same answers. But this one has a definite conclusion.
    Find me everywhere I am on the Internet here: timchilders.bio.link.
    I started this channel in order to document life as it gets lived. It's about where I live, how I live, where I travel, why I travel, and so much more. Eclectic is a good word for the content to be found here. I hope you will come along for the ride!

ความคิดเห็น • 375

  • @aflack1000
    @aflack1000 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +92

    After several years of dumping stuff and reading all the best books on the subject, I invented my own question when trying to make a decision about "stuff." While Marie Kondo asks if something "sparks joy", I ask, "If you saw this at Goodwill for $ .99, would you buy it?" If the answer is, "No", it's gone. Funny, 'cause I've been wanting a small ceramic kitty figurine and just a few days ago I found a vintage kitty "vase" thingie. It's very small and, guess what? It cost $.99 and I bought it. It sits on my kitchen window sill and "sparks joy." 🐱🤣

    • @Good-DaySunshine
      @Good-DaySunshine 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      Yea!! I love "thingies" too!

    • @jobielifehappens7102
      @jobielifehappens7102 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      I love that idea!

    • @eileenlehonnyberg1576
      @eileenlehonnyberg1576 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Yikes, I would have too much stuff if I bought everything for 99 cents.

    • @lrx54
      @lrx54 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      This is a brilliant question. I’m on my own 35 year uncluttering journey. Thank you for your help 🌻

    • @aflack1000
      @aflack1000 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

      The point is 99.9% of the stuff you wouldn't buy even for 99 cents. It was specific object I desired to have ( I have no idea of why.) My vintage kitty thingie makes me very happy while I'm washing dishes and it smiles up at me. It was a decision - not a need, but a want. Mean time I loaded up two or three boxes of "stuff" to go to the thrift store. Decluttering doesn't mean making yourself miserable. @@eileenlehonnyberg1576

  • @joanneobrien9186
    @joanneobrien9186 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +84

    I sold our house three years ago. After asking my three children what they would like the answer was “not much”. Every time I went to donate another box I literally cried. there goes the 80’s- my doll collection, our girls collection, etc. my poor husband, I attached so much value to collecting things instead of experiences. Therefore, we promised to each other, we would travel and downsize our current situation. After the pandemic we moved from our daughter family home to a very nice adult community by the beach. We love the peace and solitude by the ocean. We’re still in driving distance to our friends and other family members. We now live with used furniture in our dining room. I will replace that. But, am I silly to think about how much money should we spend based on our longevity, styles and cost? I agree with you, less is more. It allows a place/room to breathe! You also feel lighter. Good luck in your decision making.

    • @shodson314
      @shodson314 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +9

      I say buy what makes you and your husband comfortable. No sense in spending less on furniture because you don’t know how long you’ll be here and want to get your money’s worth. Buy what you like, what feels good to your aging body but don’t let yourself crowd your new space💚

    • @theoddityshoppe
      @theoddityshoppe 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      Don't forget the rental places! They will give you month to month leases and you don't have to purchase it or you can if you want...and you can swap out for new stuff when you want to redecorate if you rent. They will even do whole house/apt packages and they will include wall art, lamps, small statues/art. You don't have to commit and you can get really nice stuff!

    • @wendyeskelin8765
      @wendyeskelin8765 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

      I think buy what you need and make it good quality. A comfortable couch/chair/bed goes a long way to how you feel.

    • @aflack1000
      @aflack1000 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

      When my mom got divorced and remarried her dining room table was a round high quality folding card table. She plunked a floor length tablecloth on it and it looked lovely. After she passed away many years later the table became mine and I used it for at least 25 or more years in various applications since I had a dining table. I call that a good buy...😃

    • @TRoseTheArtist
      @TRoseTheArtist 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      Our priorities change. I understand your tears. You are letting go to go forward and that is good. Good luck on your new adventures!

  • @deloreslowndes762
    @deloreslowndes762 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +53

    Personally I prefer hallways unobstructed.

  • @theoddityshoppe
    @theoddityshoppe 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +22

    Y'all ever notice when you clean out a space, later with the lights out, you can still feel the fresh renewed energy. It's really weird.

    • @anxylum
      @anxylum 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

      Yes! It’s like how your car drives better after a good wash. ☺️

    • @fwebster6226
      @fwebster6226 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Yeah, its like the energy stagnates with more clutter.

  • @brittaschormann4554
    @brittaschormann4554 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +46

    I'm pretty sure I would've come to the same conclusion: The space is more important than the table.
    If something doesn't add to your life, it's time to substract. 😉

  • @simply.clutterfree
    @simply.clutterfree 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +54

    I can relate. I've discovered after a few years of minimizing my home that my clutter is like an onion and as I peel back more layers - the feeling of freedom grows.
    Your experience suggests we add a question to the typical ones we ask when deciding if we should keep something...
    1) Do I need it?
    2) Do I use it?
    3) Do I LOVE it?
    4) Is it SERVING me in my current journey?
    I have become better at realizing that I can LOVE something. But it doesn't mean I need to OWN it.
    It's truly been helpful in my recovery from my past as an impulsive spender. ☺️

    • @JasmineBrownOttawa
      @JasmineBrownOttawa 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      I like your comparison to onions. To misquote Shrek, orgres (and clutter) are like onions. They have layers 😆🤣

    • @simply.clutterfree
      @simply.clutterfree 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      @@JasmineBrownOttawa 😂❤️

    • @Good-DaySunshine
      @Good-DaySunshine 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      Can you give an example of #4 please? 😊

    • @simply.clutterfree
      @simply.clutterfree 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

      @@Good-DaySunshine Tim's Table. He loves it. He likes the look - but right now he's prioritizing the freedom that fewer things and more space gives him. So he let it go. It's not "serving" him in his current journey. ❤️

    • @Good-DaySunshine
      @Good-DaySunshine 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      @@simply.clutterfree Interesting! I see... thank you for the example! 💖

  • @nancycerreta5629
    @nancycerreta5629 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +37

    Feels better with the table gone. I think it could be a safety issue. A clear straight pathway is safer.

    • @asinheaven
      @asinheaven 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      Several years ago, my 6' 4", 230 lb husband had to be carried unconscious out of our bedroom by 6 firemen (he survived). This has made me realize how critical it is to maintain unobstructed pathways.

  • @lauravasquez169
    @lauravasquez169 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

    We have lived at our house for 34 years. We have 2 hallways. One when you walk inside from the garage. You don't want any furniture in the way when you are bringing in groceries. Upstairs hallway youvdont want to stub your toe when you get up to gonto the bathroom. So my hallways are safe day and night.

  • @simini1837
    @simini1837 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +11

    What you feel after removing the table might be Feng Shui, flowing air

  • @LiveItLikeLisa
    @LiveItLikeLisa 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

    After dealing with my late MIL estate and also all getting rid of all my dads ‘stuff’ after him going into aged care. I have been getting rid of ‘stuff’ in my own home for the last few years and lucky for me I don’t have any attachment to ‘stuff’ so find it very easy to get rid of it. The empty spaces are so much more calming to my mind than ‘all the pretty things’. I am finally using my home in a way that makes it practical and makes my life easier rather than having it look pretty for Instagram. Less stuff means less work, less cleaning and less overwhelming and also less for my kids to deal with when my time comes to and end. It’s very freeing and you don’t realise just how much until you do it.

  • @berniea.3255
    @berniea.3255 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +16

    I was in the antique business for years. As most antique dealers, my house had many good pieces and small antiques in it. When we decided to move out of state, I sold everything. I immediately felt like a weight had been lifted. I didn’t realize until then how much stuff was affecting my own mental health. Very freeing experience!

    • @Good-DaySunshine
      @Good-DaySunshine 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Excellent thoughts! Also, is your dog part Beagle? CUTE!

    • @berniea.3255
      @berniea.3255 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      @@Good-DaySunshine We don’t know for sure. He is a rescue but he is vocal, nosey, and a hunter and destroyer of toys so he might be! Thanks!

  • @obragg1
    @obragg1 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    Art galleries don’t need tables to showcase art. Now you have the freedom to showcase more of your photography without the limitation of a table.

  • @arlenekeith6235
    @arlenekeith6235 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +24

    I get the dilemma. But i prefer the open space once you get used to it. It is easier to vacuum also. 😊

  • @JasmineBrownOttawa
    @JasmineBrownOttawa 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +20

    Thank you for walking through this thought process of "it depends". Yes, sometimes the space brings a joy and lightness which is worth more than the item. Sometimes not. I'm enjoying watching and relating to your journey!

  • @A.Manishaa-nk9md
    @A.Manishaa-nk9md 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Your voice is relaxing calm... whenever I listen, I am like, "Yeah, grandpa ya, and more cute stories."😊
    Live long ❤

  • @carolgroves4818
    @carolgroves4818 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +9

    Seems as though, even well loved possessions, have a shelf life.

  • @lockback
    @lockback 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

    Nicely said. Thanks for the video. I am in the early stages of decluttering. I am realizing that decluttering is going to take multiple passes. Per Winston Churchill: “Now this is not the end. It is not even the beginning of the end. But it is, perhaps, the end of the beginning.”

  • @geekmomba
    @geekmomba 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

    Great post. While the table is beautiful you have to do what works for you. 12 years ago my husband passed away and I decided that living with others was more important to me than having a house full of stuff. As a result, i now live with roommates where we are committed to being "family by choice." This meant that i moved from a whole house full of belongings down to a bedroom of my own with common spaces filled with shared items. I am the only roommate who chooses to sleep in a TWIN bed so my room has space to breathe. Granted my floor space may only be 6 steps across, but it still makes my room feel bigger than it is.

    • @mariah3654
      @mariah3654 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I love this!

  • @pinkroses135
    @pinkroses135 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +26

    That expansive feeling. Like you can float right into your future without a weightedness haha. I've been looking to cut back like this to simplify housekeeping routines. Those little lampshades, ledges and crevices on things and flat surfaces really add up.

  • @VJ-ip1xc
    @VJ-ip1xc 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +11

    Great suggestion to do the test with and without the setting until the choice becomes an easy one to make - definitely my takeaway from this video. 🙂

  • @destmichael
    @destmichael 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    I have noticed when I'm going through things I become more discerning about what I am bringing into the space. It automatically changes my shopping habits. I've discovered my fatal flaw is not culling my necessary former purchases when their no longer useful. Food is not the only thing with an expiration date. Who knew?

  • @DG20556
    @DG20556 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +15

    We sold our home and moved to another state 2 years ago. Up until then, I was the only one trying to get rid of things. My husband wanted to hold on to things. When we were in a time crunch for packing, and trying to fit everything in a certain size moving van, he was the one getting rid of things! When we moved into our new house, we continued to get rid of things, and now we only have items we really need/like. Our kids don't want anything we tried to give them!

    • @bernadetteswanson3304
      @bernadetteswanson3304 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +8

      My kids' homes are stuffed, and they would have no space for adding mine!

    • @jesusnameaboveallnames7369
      @jesusnameaboveallnames7369 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

      09.14.2023
      A large portion of younger people don't want things; especially items from their parents or grandparents.
      The thing now a days is living life, enjoying time with family/friends, enjoying experiences, making memories, having adventures, etc.
      I sure do wish that I had the same carefree outlook when I was a young adult.
      Am 65+ plus now, in relatively good health, but when I pass ... 95% of my stuff will be tossed by my adult kids. 🤷‍♀️

  • @kellywentling4549
    @kellywentling4549 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    I agree with your decision. It makes the space lighter. I’ve never thought about moving something like that out and living with it bare, moving it back and really determining which way to go. Love this approach! I struggle with letting go, really struggle, but I’m ready to be lighter. I appreciate this video so much! 😊

  • @nancymillet8210
    @nancymillet8210 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I agree with you. The space is nice without the table. Keep what you live and let the rest go.

  • @librarynan4610
    @librarynan4610 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +18

    Deciding what to keep is an individual decision. I decide to keep my 8 sets of dishes because I use them, but I have let a lot of other things go. It is really all about what you use and enjoy. I do like the hall without the table!

  • @michaelstiller8498
    @michaelstiller8498 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    Tim….subject furniture….heavy….dark…expensive furniture….starting 20 years ago …I started getting rid of fine China, glassware, cut glass, antique Swedish linen…then that enabled me to get rid of a very dark, very expensive, very heavy 4 section China hutch….I ended up getting rid of all heavy dark oppressive furniture….it made way for a lighter brighter look inside my house😊😊😊KCMary……

  • @jacki838
    @jacki838 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    Table could easily become a tripping hazard. It's good to let it go.

  • @googlamonster5086
    @googlamonster5086 5 วันที่ผ่านมา

    You made the right decision. I shudder to think of all the furniture items I've purchased over the years that I've given away and paid to have taken away. I much happier without non-functional and/or clutter collectors in my apartment. Another bonus is that floor cleaning is so much easier.

  • @thetackroomtx
    @thetackroomtx 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +17

    You have impeccable timing! As I am packing up stuff in the leaving room I turn on TH-cam on tv and there you are! We are moving and I am packing up a house we have been in for 26yrs and full of "stuff" It is hard - I now look at everything and say do I love it, and do I want to manage it.
    A lot is going - finding a home for stuff is tough! I cant tell you how much you have helped me to go through this process. Big hug!

  • @juliehoot3916
    @juliehoot3916 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +12

    Great video 😂! Love it without the table and lamp. Things just get dusty and personally I am sick of dusting and cleaning around items. They need to go! So many better things to do with my life than dusting and cleaning around stuff! 👍

    • @Good-DaySunshine
      @Good-DaySunshine 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

      LOL! 😂 "I am sick of dusting.." I used to daydream a giant fan in the ceiling. You push a button and the roof folds up. Flip the fan switch and all the dust gets sucked out...except after that, now the tree leaves have dust all over them. Go outside and knock the dust off the leaves. The dust coats the grass, a big breeze comes along and the dust lands back in the house, coming through the open windows. I possibly, probably, definitely borrowed that idea from The Cat in The Hat. (The pink icing in the snow) 😁

  • @dianecyment1715
    @dianecyment1715 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    I think you made the right decision. I am grappling with whether or not to keep our area rug in the living room. We took it out to get it professionally cleaned and I noticed that not having it there opens up the space. I mentioned that to my husband, but he was not keen on the idea. We will see when we get it back and have that discussion on whether to keep it or not. Thanks for your videos.

  • @garthf9609
    @garthf9609 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    Can relate to your decision. These days I like the space and not spending time cleaning dust collectors

  • @gimmecoffee2631
    @gimmecoffee2631 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

    I moved my family from a traditionally styled home to a modern new home. We sold or gave away almost all our furniture and home decor. I am furnishing the new house very slowly, making sure pieces work together and I love everything. If it arrives and I don’t love it or it’s not comfortable I return it. I’m also trying to find less expensive pieces. I picture everything going to goodwill in 10 years, because it might. I have 3 small kids, 2 of whom have severe autism. Whether I spend a lot on a piece or a little on a piece the results tend to be the same in about 5 years- either it is damaged, no longer works for us, or I no longer like it. So I may as well save money on it. I find I just love seeing blank spaces, our beautiful finishes and white and neutral wall colors, beautiful windows, etc. I don’t want visual clutter. I would far rather look at a wall and see one piece of wall art than a table or bookcase with decorative objects on it. I’m finding that I might even prefer to look at the blank wall. I’ll see whether I can find some soothing contemporary or modern wall art to sparingly decorate my home. Let me know any ideas, anyone.

    • @SpeakTruthBeKind
      @SpeakTruthBeKind 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      I’m wondering if you’ve noticed if your two children that have autism are calmer in a home that has less stuff? A empty wall that has been painted a favorite color would also be calming. I’m noticing when a person doesn’t have carpeting, the room tends to echo…carpet can help with absorbing sound as well as heavy drapes. It surprises me how much calmer I feel in a room with fewer tchotchkes. 😍

    • @Good-DaySunshine
      @Good-DaySunshine 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      Looking at greenery is supposed to be calming. A 5 yr study (Stanford) showed females who live where they view lots of greenery are healthy and happy.

    • @gimmecoffee2631
      @gimmecoffee2631 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      @@Good-DaySunshine I believe it. The windows in our new home are huge and uncovered now except the bedrooms and bathrooms. My family and I love looking out at the front and back yards. That’s another reason I don’t feel much of an urge to put stuff on the walls.

    • @Good-DaySunshine
      @Good-DaySunshine 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      @@gimmecoffee2631 Sounds wonderful!

    • @gimmecoffee2631
      @gimmecoffee2631 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@SpeakTruthBeKind They are calmer and so am I for sure. They have a play room with their toys where they can get them, play and put them back and the toy clutter stays there. Just not seeing that all over the 1st floor is a huge improvement. My 7 yo non verbal son used to stim a lot by making piles of toys. He still does that sometimes but now he spends more time in the family room watching movies and rolling around the house on a toy horse on wheels (wondee rides on Amazon), looking out the windows and interacting with us. My 4 yo with ASD just loves it too. No doubt it made a difference.
      And good point about the sound absorption. I should move forward and get more of the rugs, sofas, and sold things I planned.

  • @michaelstiller8498
    @michaelstiller8498 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Tim….after watching or rewatching several of your video’s yesterday… I went and did mainly kitchen pick up and clearing counters off…..less stuff gives more open clean space & lines…trying to think about you photo talk about creating space…the clearing of your small decorative table made such a nice clear clean look to your hallway…I did that same clearing to my hallway several years ago…it helps you to flow through your hall to your bedroom area with no distraction…stuff can really distract us…big stuff, expensive stuff, decorative stuff, old stuff we never use stuff….yes Tim, keep destuffing your stuff…remembering it’s only stuff…KCMary…….😊😊😊

  • @janeberrisford8555
    @janeberrisford8555 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +20

    The struggle is real ! This is just what I needed, thanks NRM 😊

    • @Good-DaySunshine
      @Good-DaySunshine 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Did you mean "ARM" (Angela to Dwight, The Office) 😂😂😂

  • @pattypatterson9751
    @pattypatterson9751 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Space is gold!

  • @sallieredman7349
    @sallieredman7349 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I loved my home and my style of decorating. When I married, my husband is a minimalist, we stayed in his home for a while. When we returned to my home, suddenly all my beloved things jumped out at me and caused me stress. I am now a more minimalist and I can really see the things we have. I am grateful for making that choice. (and for choosing my husband).

    • @akontarini
      @akontarini 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

      😅happy you are happy about choosing the right husband

  • @uddercharmsfarm8159
    @uddercharmsfarm8159 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +9

    I've gone thru my house twice now and it's so much better. However, I have 3 porches and a farm to work on. I've come to same conclusion as you - I love the space more than the things in the space. I've got so many things set aside for the October garage sale!!! Even tho I'm in a lot of outdoor space, hanging on to literally a bunch of junk in case you might use it someday is just not good!

  • @TacoDale
    @TacoDale 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    Tim, I think you are exactly on the nose with this one. We sometimes buy stuff to create a scene or aesthetic and we like the way it looks or feels at first but then it becomes heavy or in the way and we feel like we have to keep it because like you said "the table goes with the picture" but in looking at the space without the table I see an easier path to move up and down the hall and now I don't have to avoid bumping into the table or knocking the lamp off in the floor. If you really like the table find another spot in the house it can be of purpose that isn't blocking the way. I have found as I get older that I am constantly removing furniture that I once thought I had to have but now just find it to be in the way.

  • @CraigHagan
    @CraigHagan 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    This is a struggle for me with my father's and grandfathers possessions that are the last worldly things of theirs and the last physical connection to them. These large emotional things can really block a fellow up some.
    In the end they are just things but that still doesn't seem right but probably is as it will be for my old things and I wouldn't want to burden anyone with my old stuff.
    I try to think of those times when I'm traveling and staying in a hotel or on the road camping when I don't bring these things with me and I'm quite fine without them.

  • @user-hw9vf4pl9s
    @user-hw9vf4pl9s 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I just love listening to you speak

  • @tarynsanmartino8930
    @tarynsanmartino8930 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +9

    Ah, the essentialism for your soul. I like that description very much. One of the things that boggles my mind is how long it takes to make a decision on what stays and what goes. About 10 years ago, after my folks had passed, I moved my 50 years accumulations into the family home. It has been a long and arduous process that still leaves me with what I consider too much stuff. I've gotten down to where I consider the place quite habitable. However, I'm always struggling to find what else I can bare to part with. It's exhausting and often leads me to getting stuck along the way and not being able to move forward. I guess I've inherited both my parents way of dealing with too much stuff. One had the mindset of "just heave it" and the other was a saver. God help me. Lol

  • @carolemetz380
    @carolemetz380 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I enjoy spaciousness and light. It’s where I feel the calmest but have the most energy. I have always loved Psalm 18:19 He brought me out into a spacious place; he rescued me because he delighted in me. Other versions say a broad place. Broad and spacious places give us room to grow. When we don’t have that we wither. ….at least that’s true for me.

  • @gloriaedington3442
    @gloriaedington3442 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Freedom! Freedom! Freedom from time consuming dusting, making cleaning sooooo much easier, should cause you to want to dance back and forth like those in the Freedom Flashmob at Boardwalk - Santa Cruz, CA. 🎉 😊

  • @megsojourner8150
    @megsojourner8150 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    area looked nice either way though I too prefer open uncluttered look. Change doesn’t need to b permanent ... for now, this is what u like.
    Some folks absolutely won’t consider any change. I applaud you!

  • @bethmclean6740
    @bethmclean6740 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    I’ll take space over stuff any day … light airy space = clear calm mind for me

    • @michaelstiller8498
      @michaelstiller8498 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Yes a nice clear calm mind…we can’t change the world outside our homes, but we can control what our atmosphere looks like and feels like inside our 🏠 homes…the more chaotic behavior we hear and see what is going on outside in our country and our world….I feel that drives us to want to have a clear calm mind inside our homes…KCMary..🙏😊🙏…

  • @michaelstiller8498
    @michaelstiller8498 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Tim after listening to your videos and reading comments I was able to get up…. and toss two floppy plants…put away 2 spring looking decor items….and relocate an arrangement to another room…at least I now have the ball rolling….Thanks Tim for inspiring me this morning…KCMary…😊🙏😊

  • @susanblondefield1241
    @susanblondefield1241 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

    In many cases space is my preference. Great tips to think about.

  • @luckysuzful
    @luckysuzful 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +8

    My dad died back in 2019 and my mom had died 7 years before that. So as we were cleaning out the house and identifying what we wanted, we came across my dad's foot locker from his Navy days. Inside it were some photos of him that I had never seen, so of course we're keeping those. But also inside was a box that contained his dress uniform and hat. I have absolutely no use for these items, but I couldn't seem to part with them, knowing that they had been important enough for my dad to hang on to after all these years. So now I have the uniform in the same box, not on display or anything. I know I have no need for the uniform, but the sentimental nature of it keeps me hung up. We also found pictures of him in his dress uniform, which should be enough to commemorate the item, but I still find it hard to part with this item that I will literally never use or need. I find myself feeling guilty about the prospect of giving it away. Any thoughts?

    • @patriciacarlson4206
      @patriciacarlson4206 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      You might contact your local Navy office and see if they might have a local museum or other suggestion of how to honor your Dad's uniform. I have the same issue with my Dad's medals. It isn't easy!

    • @JasmineBrownOttawa
      @JasmineBrownOttawa 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@patriciacarlson4206 That is a great idea that would honour his service. I will tuck that away in case I ever know someone facing the same issue.

    • @bernadetteswanson3304
      @bernadetteswanson3304 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      My MIL made a teddy bear for my husband out of his uniform. OR: Is there a theater group, costume shop, or historical organization that might want it? What will happen to it after you are gone? If the material can be recycled in some way, that would be better than trashing it. Letting go can be so hard emotionally!

    • @almamartinez3377
      @almamartinez3377 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      Keep it for grandchildren to keep and so on.

    • @user-hw9vf4pl9s
      @user-hw9vf4pl9s 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      You can reach out to a museum or the branch of service he was in and ask if they would like them. Take a picture of everything and keep that for yourself...

  • @janet5123
    @janet5123 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    “Good for my soul.”Truth! Excellent video.

  • @stowie7733
    @stowie7733 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    My first experience with minimalism was when I realized I hated my mismatch of dinnerware (plates, bowls, mugs, etc.). I bought a serving for four, of plain white dinnerware and donated all the old stuff. The feeling I had opening the cupboard was beyond words and pretty soon I was getting rid of extra glasses, utensils and even my mismatch pots & pans. It is such an awesome feeling to only have what I truly need and nothing more. I’m still working on other areas of my home but I know I got rid of 50% of my stuff so far (plus gave my adult kids all their stuff!). Clothing…Ugh…my nemesis!! 😂

  • @ellenherman9543
    @ellenherman9543 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    Boy your doing your kids a huge favor decluttering❤

    • @kzZnAT0r
      @kzZnAT0r 29 วันที่ผ่านมา

      😊❤

  • @teresacryer5872
    @teresacryer5872 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    I think we get used to how we think things "should" look instead of what actually makes us feel good about our space. Decorate with what gives you peace. Don't let the space define you - you design the space to suit your current lifestyle. Life is change, and we change with it.

    • @Good-DaySunshine
      @Good-DaySunshine 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      I love that! Bumper sticker- or coffee mug!

    • @akontarini
      @akontarini 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

      with you...

  • @carole3680
    @carole3680 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Hallways are difficult with floorspace taken by furniture no matter the relevancy of the table itself.

  • @MissFlutterGirl
    @MissFlutterGirl 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I like the open feel of the hallway. I think you made the right choice.

  • @kimgregory1305
    @kimgregory1305 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    What you said... about what's better for your soul completely resonates! I'm a 64 yr old workaholic single woman struggling with ADHD & burn-out in a position of authority in a high stress job that is starting to wreak havock on my health... at the same time totally craving a creative balance that nourishes my soul! I have joy in my heart but at the same time wake up with looming dread at just the thought of going to work in my current position one more day! I am praying for guidance to make the best decisions moving forward but find myself immobilized in regards to making the smallest seemingly almost insignificant decisions regarding whether or not to keep something or find it a new home! The struggle is real... thank you for sharing your insights.. you are inspiring me & giving me hope! ❤

    • @Sharon-ud4ke
      @Sharon-ud4ke 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      I understand your struggle..I often cannot make simple decisions. Also burnout was a problem and so I took a holiday and a long break from work😊

  • @beankeys8812
    @beankeys8812 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    I think Marie Condo said to keep what you love, and if it brings you joy. I’m trying to adopt this mindset. And it’s easier =faster to keep things clean.

  • @flyingsaucer1268
    @flyingsaucer1268 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    wow, what a spacy and "calm" bedroom.....now I have something to strive for

  • @robinwalker299
    @robinwalker299 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I’m also at the age and stage in life where the space is becoming more important!! 👍

  • @kzZnAT0r
    @kzZnAT0r 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Love the thought process

  • @farmyourbackyard2023
    @farmyourbackyard2023 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +11

    I don't know that I want to live a more minimalist life, but I'm a recent widow and I've struggled with getting rid of my husband's things, and the things that no longer serve me since I'm a single woman. Your videos have me thinking.

    • @juliehoot3916
      @juliehoot3916 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

      So sorry about your husband 🙏. Please consider all the people who really need that clothing. Times are hard and you can help. When you are ready, please just think of all the joy your husbands clothes will bring to people who are really struggling right now.

    • @sct4040
      @sct4040 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

      Get rid of the stuff that doesn’t serve you first , then it will get easier.❤

    • @johnhaller5851
      @johnhaller5851 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

      I'm in the opposite situation. Most clothing was donated, but I am still not sure what to do with her wedding dress. There's a connection of depression era glassware which I will never use. A baby grand piano and an accordion I will never play. I will eventually need to downsize, and finding a good home takes time I would rather spend doing other things. Perhaps I'm better off taking the things I want, and having an estate sale for everything else.

    • @farmyourbackyard2023
      @farmyourbackyard2023 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@johnhaller5851 Ouch. The wedding dress is a tough one. If there are no daughters or granddaughters to take it, there are places that take vintage wedding dresses and restore them. I think HobbyBobbins is one channel that does this.

    • @juliehoot3916
      @juliehoot3916 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      @@johnhaller5851 How about a consignment store for those items? You could also donate piano or accordion to a church or school and use the tax write off. Maybe notify a piano store what you have, bring in a pic and they could sell it for a small portion of the sale? Perhaps musicians who can't afford a brand new piano may be looking for a loved piano, slightly a little less expensive. Depending on your financial situation on selling versus donating. If I lost my wife, I would probably pack the wedding dress in acid free wrapping and keep it. We are all so different. Follow your heart. Take all the time you need. So sorry! 🙏

  • @michaelstiller8498
    @michaelstiller8498 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Tim…Beth stated a light airy space = clear calm mind…..I believe she is so right on, with this statement..thanks Beth….I wrote this is my notebook. I will use as a help guide to clear and clean…I will look at an area and ask…does this stuff give me a clear calm mind…I put it on a 3x5 card and will read it looking at each area in my 🏠 house….this is what I needed for inspiration to get me out of bed and move my muscles today…😊😊😊

  • @patriciastuart8079
    @patriciastuart8079 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Your decision-making process is resonant with that of Marie Kondo: "does it spark joy?"

  • @shirleyferber245
    @shirleyferber245 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I picked up a nice wooden, upholstered chair like IKEA has at the dumpster. I soon realized there was a screw holding it together but I only wanted it as a decorative item. Kept it a while, then put it back at the dumpster. About a year later, I saw a similar chair by someone's mailbox on trash day and took it home thinking it was a great find. It has been reupholstered. I got it home. It was the same chair. I guess it wanted me.

    • @akontarini
      @akontarini 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      that's just great story. yes, the chair won!🤣

    • @TheNewRetiredMe
      @TheNewRetiredMe  7 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      That’s such a great story!

  • @joanndaprile9076
    @joanndaprile9076 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    For me, at some point I think I will have to work in reverse to get rid of things.
    Find another place to live; a small home or something similar, then go back to my too big of a house jammed full of things and pick out things I need and/or want at the new place, and stop when I am set in the new place.
    Then, go back to the big place and get rid of things. However, I realize that I may find some things that hold sentimental value and I wish to keep, or find something I realize I can really use or want at the new place. But I think I will find it so much easier for me to let go of things working that way.
    Achieving that in reverse will not be an easy task since I'll have to be able to afford paying for two homes at the same time, and the new place would have to be close enough to easily accomplish the back and forth with the old place.
    For now, I will plod through and take 2 steps forward and one step back every day. I am (somewhat) inspired by your bravery!

  • @grammienoob2997
    @grammienoob2997 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

    “Freer” is an excellent way to describe the feeling. Perhaps with a hint of joyful lightness.

  • @heyjude5027
    @heyjude5027 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I love the free space in the hallway😊

  • @twinkiscpost5717
    @twinkiscpost5717 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Totally agree!

  • @sandywilkerson9271
    @sandywilkerson9271 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    I like the space without the table…I have the same problem..😂😂😂

  • @sherrydee7880
    @sherrydee7880 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    After struggling for years to downsize and declutter, I now realize that I should have gone with my 1st instinct to just pack up the things that I want in my life and let someone else take the rest. It's far too taxing for my brain and my heart to have to deal with the emotions that come with each and every item from my past. I just want it gone so I can move on with living in the here and now instead of the "good old days" of "what could have been"! I'm doing it so that my child isn't stuck with it when I die. Thank goodness I have no grandchildren to dump this stuff on. I would never visit them if I had to see all of my old stuff staring me in the face.

    • @user-hw9vf4pl9s
      @user-hw9vf4pl9s 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      I am in the process of doing this exact thing... my own estate sale ...even tho I still alive and kickin'. I just want all the "stuff" gone, there are a few items I'd like to keep but pretty much everything else can go and since my only child doesn't speak to me an more (thanks to the crap University is heaping on these kids...I basically paid a place for 4 years to turn my child against every value she was brought up with and that I, the parent am enemy #1) So any way time to move forward and that means go as light as possible and a fresh clean start. I spoke with a gal who runs estate sales, and she told me exactly what to do and if I want to hire them I can do that too. LET IT GO LET IT GO !!!!!

    • @Good-DaySunshine
      @Good-DaySunshine 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      💕 Hugs!

    • @lindapierce4399
      @lindapierce4399 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      😢❤

    • @akontarini
      @akontarini 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

      💚

  • @limonade2684
    @limonade2684 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

    You are a photographer and you have a trained eye. Trust it. Music without pauses is noise and we don't like busy pictures.
    Before I get rid of the table I love, I would check, if I can switch it with a table I love less. Sometimes it can be a funny twist to put it in a modern bathroom or kitchen and really use it. I admire people who can mix styles and express their personality. Today the design style is not to be so matchy-matchy but more eclectic.

  • @LV12800
    @LV12800 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    No table and all the paraphernalia onit...Love the open space, so much more freeing! ❤

  • @abcxyz1797
    @abcxyz1797 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Less to clean. No table to dust, and easier to clean the floor, too.

  • @suewilkinsonmorrobayca6590
    @suewilkinsonmorrobayca6590 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    Well said. Thanks

  • @exploringnewhites
    @exploringnewhites 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    Yes I loved the extra breathing space created in our bedroom when I decluttered and got rid of the big furniture. Feels so good. I did a video on our bedroom redo too!

    • @Good-DaySunshine
      @Good-DaySunshine 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      Are you sharing the title? Please?

  • @Gretchen-vh9xt
    @Gretchen-vh9xt 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    I like your thought process to make the decision.

  • @ravenmccall5486
    @ravenmccall5486 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I have learned that I have to be ready to release a loved piece, or look. If I am do not feel ready to let it go, I don't. Then, later, it feels right. I have to be ready to let it go! My parents died young and I think that is why my process is what it is.

  • @stephaniecranston8134
    @stephaniecranston8134 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Very interesting observation. I want to remember this for my own decluttering. Thank you.

  • @PenniP
    @PenniP 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    More space, uncluttered is always very calming to me. I think that is why I always love the aesthetics of hotel rooms! Ahhhhh

  • @tinglestingles
    @tinglestingles 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    When we moved to Portugal - we decided on 2 suitcases each, that's it. We knew they have stores and shopping malls - also, Amazon, Spain is available. I cannot imagine how difficult it would be to deal with Portuguese customs etc.

    • @Good-DaySunshine
      @Good-DaySunshine 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      @tinglestingles How exciting to pack suitcases and go! I know two families that did that and the move is permanent. The couple with children are living in Italy, the other couple is in Germany. I hope your move to Portugal is everything you wanted and life couldn't be happier for you and yours!

    • @tinglestingles
      @tinglestingles 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      @@Good-DaySunshine thank you. We’ve been here 17 months now and yes it’s great! No place is paradise but we are extremely happy.

  • @brandonjordan_
    @brandonjordan_ 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

    As always, great video Tim ! - I appreciate the "struggle" of letting go of the table but realizing the freedom aspect.

  • @wendajones9040
    @wendajones9040 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I liked your reasoning! Space is wonderful.

  • @sharonsmith7917
    @sharonsmith7917 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Breathing space is good for the soul.

  • @lrx54
    @lrx54 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    This is really refreshing to me. I’ve never heard a male talk about these types of issues. These are the issues that take over my brain waves on a regular basis, an ongoing dialogue with myself.
    At first glance I Loved! that table/lamp and hallway btw. I rarely like anything. But, less is always more.

  • @heidic1398
    @heidic1398 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I think in our modern life, with screens and constant visuals, loud and bombastic, an empty space is restful and quiet. We can just enjoy the space and the architectural elements.

    • @kzZnAT0r
      @kzZnAT0r 29 วันที่ผ่านมา

      😊❤

  • @susandavenport9257
    @susandavenport9257 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I am working up to getting rid of the desk/hutch in my daughter’s old room (that used to be in my girlhood bedroom). It is time.

  • @Franciso-so1bg
    @Franciso-so1bg 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

    One day, half-joking, and half-serious, I asked my son what would he do with all my 'things' when I died. I reminded him of several 'things' that I thought might be worth a few bucks. His response was to let me know that he preferred that I sell those 'things' to enjoy any money I might acquire and find new homes for the rest of it, because he would be pulling up a dumpster for what's left. I was a little shocked, but not surprised by his honesty. I realized my 'things' meant nothing to him outside of my existence. The process has been one of if/maybe/but often. I live in an 868 sq. ft. home and it's still too big for me, but I manage to find something to recycle or donate or just plain ole get rid of weekly. And I like the hallway without the table also. I have to be careful of random flat spots. They are my nemesis! You're doing a great job making those decisions. No one said it would be easy and quick. You are inspiring and helping me rethink a lot of my space as well.

  • @salliemorrill2671
    @salliemorrill2671 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Tim, I know where you are coming from about the hallway. Yes, there is a balance that exists, & finding that comes w/ trial & error. Great vid. Thank you for sharing your story.

  • @jacquelinemoorcroft2712
    @jacquelinemoorcroft2712 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I’ve learnt as I’ve got older , that I need less stuff . It’s all just stuff ! We keep things hoping to pass it down to our children etc , but most of todays young ones , want their own stuff and not hand me downs which they think they should take , cos we are more sentimental about it than them. Swedish Death cleaning teaches you how not to hang onto the past and not leave the mess to your kids . We all have far too much stuff . It’s just stuff .
    Thanks for sharing

  • @sivsuikki9428
    @sivsuikki9428 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    Can feel the struggle! I want to get rid of my books. Eleven bookcases, am I nuts?! Half of it is my first goal.

    • @paisley8519
      @paisley8519 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      I feel your pain. And yes, we book lovers are crazy! I finally realized there weren’t enough days left in my life to read all of the books I had collected. I was always thinking I’d have plenty of time to get to them after I retired. Hah. Not a chance. Five years retired and there are MORE books, not less! So this week I started filling boxes. I thought it would hurt, but instead - it felt liberating. I’m finally down to one short bookcase of books that I either cherish or haven’t read yet. My goal is one shelf. One shelf! Excuse me while I go read now.

    • @peggyparsons5003
      @peggyparsons5003 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Yikes. My downfall, too. I have reference books for art and Bible study and travel. Can't toss those out.

  • @paulap7366
    @paulap7366 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    I know exactly what you mean! I’ve felt that same way after moving - temporarily, I thought - furniture that I had placed very intentionally some years earlier. And - I also experienced it recently after changing the wall colors in a few rooms. After painting, I replaced the same furniture in the same places, but the rooms felt freer somehow. Like I could breathe again though I had not been aware of anything before other than it was time to repaint those rooms. Thank you for your videos - I feel like maybe I am not crazy after all!

    • @Good-DaySunshine
      @Good-DaySunshine 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Paulap, you aren't crazy. :)

    • @akontarini
      @akontarini 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

      If you are crazy, you got company in me...:)

  • @denisekennedy3099
    @denisekennedy3099 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I choose freeing up the space usually as well. I moved house in the summer and reconfigured two bedrooms, turning a tiny bedroom into my dressing room (sounds grand, it just means that it’s got fitted wardrobes!), which means that my bedroom has a bed, two bedside tables and a small chest of drawers. The serenity I feel from having such a sense of space is soothing and energising.

    • @kzZnAT0r
      @kzZnAT0r 29 วันที่ผ่านมา

      😊❤

  • @akontarini
    @akontarini 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

    The New Retire Me, is really The New Me! So happy to got to the point! Enjoy!

  • @desertfish6239
    @desertfish6239 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

    While the table was nice I would have gotten rid of it as well. It is one less thing to dust and easier to dust mop the hall as well. I am now in the less is more stage of life. Less cleaning is more time doing what I want to do!

  • @Theresa-jq3dw
    @Theresa-jq3dw 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +9

    Bravo👏 I love the decision you made. less is more☀️

  • @marciahenry3893
    @marciahenry3893 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    This table arrangement has gotten its share of to save or go away. Hallway looks open and nice. The whole living space will open-up with less stuff. I'll hope you don't miss it too much. Sure offered another tabletop for pictures of recent travels. 😊

  • @RitaVernoy
    @RitaVernoy 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I have the same feeling about open space. But I do enjoy certain prices that have meaning for me. I love the word essentialism.😊

  • @annsalty5615
    @annsalty5615 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Attachment to things is a tough booger for some.

  • @paigemarcantel3943
    @paigemarcantel3943 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Love the open space more!! You did great!

  • @mc5366
    @mc5366 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    I like the hallway without the table. The open space looks great and you can enjoy the picture much more.