Same. I don't even need to watch this to know that I'm toxic. :( I'm trying to change for the better though. Hoping it'll work. If not, then I'm doomed
@@beanboy6664 me too. the one about making people feel bad because I'm not okay; I do that so often and it's like automatic. I'm trying to change it. Hope you can do better too!
It's not that they aren't told they are, it's just that they feel it's either overreactions and oversensitivity, or generally that they don't believe it. And even if they do, they won't care unless they're confronted by someone who they care about. I've been one myself a few years ago, that's why I recognise it so well.
Champion Tonto the Wonder Horse not always. My most recent ex was so anxious and insecure about herself that she put me as the sole source of her happiness and clung to me to the extreme. I tried to keep up. It was completely emotionally and mentally draining. She would manipulate me in different ways to get even more attention by trying to play with my emotions in negative ways. She was completely toxic to me and made me feel toxic by needing space and trying to have to firmly stick to my needs. I feel like a complete asshole even though I didn’t mean it in any kind of toxic way. I constantly felt like I had to walk on eggshells to the point I felt like I couldn’t even communicate with her for fear of hurting her. She was also extremely good at playing the victim card. Toxic people come in many different forms and they don’t always gaslight. There’s plenty of other ways people can be toxic.
Take piece of mind by thinking of the toxic people who are stuck with other toxic people. 😂 I shouldn't laugh really, most of them don't have the ability to realise that they are toxic people.
I literally just dropped a toxic friend and I see this I- it feels relieving almost because their actions will always speak louder than their words no matter how "sorry" and how much they "love" you
same here, friend for 13 years then girlfriend for 2 years. Left her last night, and no loss of sleep. She lost a best friend and lover. Feeling awesome....peace!
@The Khool Guy Your toxic people apologise? Mine just told me I suck for making them feel bad when I call them out, or just manipulated me into believing I'm the bad one in that situation.
I had a few toxic people in my life and didn't know why they acted the way they do. I kept trying to be so nice to them...but it didn't work. I love my cat... she is such a sweetheart. I love to be with her everyday.... I wish people would be so nice and lovable like my cat. 🐈
@@cherylann1602 yes and really become unsettled when self help gurus will tell you that these people are reflecting your own energy at you and all you have to do is love or nice it away and voila.
A lot of women I've dated have been toxic as second nature. They were not even aware they were toxic and abusive--because all their friends were the same way.
At least you only dated them and you know what to look out for. I married& had kids... They're very good at some of these traits. I didn't realize what was happening for a long time.
@@mjc4942 I married into it, her son is this video personified, but mommy wipes away his tears ( for35 years now) and tells him it’s not his fault, he’s perfect,...I’ve had more than enough, it’s the same reheated drama, over and over and......
@@daniellemarcheterre7336 I'm sorry that you're going through that. Terrible when it's the one person that is supposed to love you and protect you. I hope you have some kind of support. Please take care of yourself. ❤
My sister is toxic, and we recently had a huge fight. She threatened to cut me out of her life if I didn’t “validate her feelings better.” I ended up blocking her, and I feel like I can finally breathe....
This video helped me realise that there were some people in my life who were toxic. Those people are gone now, which explains why I am happier and healthier.
Yes , although I find myself very depressed and pushing people away because of my tendency to attract toxic people... A small part of me is checking I dont ever fall in these lines.. I worry I have inherited the bad Gene's from my toxic mother and sister ... I often ask my husband if I am anything like them... Luckily ,..no so far
@@fredeemoon6053 it's good of you to keep track of your emotions and patterns to make sure you're not harming anyone. but make sure nobody is harming you either
Its like a rotten meat in the fridge. The sooner you throw it out the better otherwise risking dying from food poisoning or the fridge will be a big mess and stinky
In my life i never ever meet any toxic person. Everyone has an issues, no one is perfect. So PLEASE DO NOT GENERALISE PEOPLE CALLING THEM TOXIC. If you meet someone difficult to deal with Let them go on their way. Leave them without calling them anything. Work on yourself, dont keep blaming others. Sorry to say, but this kind of videos make us like, and helpful to leave someone, but not realy telling a truth. You might be toxic for someone else. In these days no one is thinking about dealing with problems and solving them, everyone is in rush to END the problems.
I realized that I can be toxic at times but I feel guilty about it & I'm trying to change. We can all improve ourselves & do better. Good luck to everyone who feels the same way 💗
no ur not toxic ur just flawed. toxic people NEVER change and will NEVER realize that they are toxic. If you thinks you are toxic then you are wrong or you may be a victum of a toxic person, because toxic people will also make you feel like YOu are toxic.
Hi Reema. I totally understand. I think you can really explore that question with a very good friend who will be honest with you. Just ask them. I've done that with my wife from time to time in case I have some blind spots. She's honest with me.....sometimes brutally honest. But, I give her that permission so that I can improve myself.
I am also in the journey of self-analyzation trying to figure out how to not have toxic tendencies. I want to change just struggling in that aspect. Wishing you all the best in your growth.
I've been toxic almost my entire life. It was the only thing I'd known but I decided to change and broke patterns and I improved as a person. Now I'm assertive and I can set boundaries (a big reason why I was toxic and I let toxic people get into my life). So, you can change and do better. Acceptance is the first step. You go, girl!😁❤
My ex boyfriend was like this. It's so easy to get away with things when you act all cute and innocent. That was him. To everyone else, he was this sweet, small, innocent little boy. So everyone always felt pity for him. Including me. Because of this, it made it a lot harder for me to see he wasn't a good person. Every single day, for almost a year. He guilt tripped me. He never said it directly, but he basically showed me that "if you leave me, I'll kill myself". It was horrifying. So I never broke up with him. That's right, never. He was the one who left me. Which is good, honestly, because if he hadn't, I would have never left him. I truly loved him. And I won't lie, that feeling still lingers. It makes me sick. He had many problems in his life. I'm not saying those things weren't real, in fact, I have proof that it's real. But he always used it to make me feel really bad for him. His dad abuses him. Physically, emotionally, and verbally. I've heard the audio messages. I was constantly worried about him. He never did anything in return. He said he loved me and all that, but I know that, like how it was mentioned in the video, he did that to make me think he cared about me. And hell, it really worked. When he broke up with me, I was angry. I had done everything for him, I was willing to drop everything for him, and for what? He used that to make it look like I was a toxic person. Like it was me who was manipulating and using him. Like it was me who guilt tripped him. One of his friends messaged me saying exactly that. And I fucking believed it. It only took a conversation with my friends to realize otherwise. Oh, and also, he tried to turn my own friends against me. He tried to convince my friends, the ones who had it been for them, I wouldn't be here, that I was the bad guy. Thankfully, my friends are smart enough to recognize that that wasn't the case. I still have them. I couldn't imagine what would've happened if his manipulation worked on them. I would've lost everything. I wouldn't be here typing this, I'd probably have killed myself. All because of one sick individual. But no, no. I've got it all wrong, right? I'm the toxic one, I'm the guilt tripper. Me, loving him with all I have and being a good boyfriend to him? Never. Absolute bullshit. I'm the toxic one because I got angry at him. Of course. I didn't think this would be so long. Thank you so much for reading this far. Please be careful when you fall for someone, and if your friends think they aren't good for you, please believe them. Don't make the same mistake I did. Love blinds you like that. So, be wary, okay?
Thanks for sharing this, that was such an emotional rollercoaster to read and I trust it wasn't easy to open up like that. 😢 It's so hard when you can't see the truth. I'm so glad you had friends to save you from that episode, though. ;) Your ex reminds me of myself... I expected unconditional love from my BFF but when she didn't talk to me that often I exploded on her and accused her of not caring. We're not talking and I'm not sure if we'll get back together. But what you said really made me realize how much pain I gave her, and I have to thank you for the dose of empathy. Looking back, part of the reason I "loved" her was to fill the hole inside me - by "hole" i mean the belief that I'm not loveable and that people don't want to care. (That's pretty scary to admit, considering that we saw each other as one of the most real friends we've ever had). But I've decided I'm going to move on and fill my hole so nobody else has to fall down it anymore. I hope you're healing from everything, and know that I'm going to make a dent in the amount of toxicity our society has. Love, kev
I have a friend in a relationship similar to what you went through. It's a mix of coersive and emotional abuse. It's about control and power. His "partner" is isolating him from those who love him, myself included. I've heard his abuser screaming at him over the phone just because he was sitting in my living room. Pure possessive jealousy. As it stands now, I haven't seen him for the last 6 mos. or heard from him for the last 2 mos. I'm worried but there is nothing I can do until he throws his abuser under the bus and moves on. I will be here for him. I made him that promise. You are a survivor. Let your wounds heal and know that you have people who care. All the best as you move forward.
I have been there. Just be happy that you didn't marry him. Imagine a life with that abuse - not worth it. After less than 3 yrs of marriage and 2 daughters 1 & 2, I kicked his ass out. He went on to have 2 more wives. He was an a**hole, no regrets.
was actually hoping on same suggestion but its better to venture around more on this trope. i think best is to start listening to those emotions like guilt, shame, regret, jealousy, anger you've been blocking out or acting too highly upon. start researching what these emotions really mean, and better ways to let them out. its good to remember we've all dealt with our own kinds of trauma and have our own coping mechanisms around it (its highly likely we've developed these tropes from parents/people surrounded by but be ready to realise just how bad these tropes were, how they affected you and those around you). its never too late to break those bad habits; find alternatives. bad habits take a long while to break permanently so might be worth making part of routine with alarms for journalling, meditation, soothing music, going for a walk, etc. for me i was dealing with a lot of anger so once found calmness through that i felt okay. it'll also be worth looking up defense mechanisms, when these are too high we start to block out everything and rely too much on denial. realise when its time to be quiet, we don't always have to fill these silences with own "witty" comments.
I think a toxic person would never think that the problem comes from them. Also, trying to convince someone that is toxic that they are toxic, is like trying to convince a crazy person that they are crazy. And all of us can have toxic behaviors that we're not aware of, but it doesn't necessarily makes us toxic people, it's like a scale of toxicity. The solution is that we have to love ourselves and set boundries with people.
Hey guys im a new youtuber and I just made a short video about toxic people its a bit different but if it catches your mind I would appreciate the support❤
@@MrOliverLyons My advice its analyze the situation of each friend and watch how u feel in the scenario of they dont do X or Y things to you, if u feel an intermediate relief thats a huge sign you should cut them out of ur life. Nostalgic may play against you, since you will remember the good times and will make that a reason to dont cut them out, but really, those good moments doesnt allow them to treat u bad the rest of the time. I cut out a friendship cuz i felt ignored, only noticed when he needed/want something and would leave me without reply just because. Last time i invited him to a water park, he saw the msg, and replied 10 days later. I know he have some social and trust issues, i understood that but it was a friendship of a decade, and i didnt want to feel bad, and feel like i would have to wait for them to show me some affection/appreciation/care/interest in having me in his life. Basically, i was begging for love and i got tired. It was a little sad but i feel so much better and im happy with the current friends i have, sometimes i noticed they do things i would normally would had to ask and beg him (old friend) to do so i realice "yeah, it wasnt really a friendship after all"
Wow perfect timing. I just ended things with someone who’s been saying homophobic things behind my back and always made me feel like shit for my weight
This video truly resonates deep, I myself have dealt with so many toxic people in my life🦠 So much so that I decided to Create my own video on Letting Go Of TOXIC People, If you are reading this right now and you are dealing with a TOXIC person Go ahead and Watch my video th-cam.com/video/CELIIlJkdvc/w-d-xo.html
I'm gonna fight back I'm not taking it anymore wanna be disloyal? Wanna abuse me? Wanna watch me cry? Wanna talk about how you are intimate with other?Wanna publicly shame me then stop crying when it happens to you😊
I went no contact, changed my cellphone number and moved away. Since I’m viewed as the problem I’m a problem solver and did what was necessary all the way around. Everyone who saw me as their problem are free now. Wasn’t that nice of me. Now I’m in the most wonderful three some called Me, Myself and I and I love all three of me 👍👍
Don't worry. Being toxic to a degree where it's THAT bad, you would do it on purpose. If you're already questioning yourself like that you're doing just fine
In my life i never ever meet any toxic person. Everyone has a issues, no one is perfect. So PLEASE DO NOT GENERALISE PEOPLE CALLING THEM TOXIC. If you meet someone difficult to deal with Let them go on their way. Leave them without calling them anything. Work on yourself, dont keep blaming others. Sorry to say, but this kind of videos make us like, and helpful to leave someone, but not realy telling a truth. You might be toxic for someone else. In these days no one is thinking about dealing with problems and solving them, everyone is in rushing to END the problems.
The fact that you care about not wanting to be toxic to those arounds you, shows you have a lot of good in you. Just keep nurturing the good and believe in yourself.
They are overtly dramatic. They can't digest food until they bring negativity on the table - the big sign of highly toxic people. Great video. Enjoyed a lot. 👍
This is 100% true for a “friend” i finally unloaded yesterday. This person kept doing everything on your list but because I know them a long time,I kept them in my life. No more, I’ve had it with their heartlessness, greed, dishonesty, and selfishness. You can’t fix these people, best to cut the loose. They’re sociopathic and dangerous.
@@podmear3854 these people never change and don't tell them these things because if you did, they will just get so mad at you and hurt you again. And they will never be convinced.
my own mother is a toxic person. she always was, I just didn t want to accept it. finally after 35 years I got her out of my life and my life is getting better and better and better.... p. s.: be careful, toxic people NEVER change, just go away from them to save yourself.
Who's this shitty person? The way you see the person that way only it appears to be. You can never blaim your mother to be toxic. Never ever in your life.
Before calling someone shitty, I would suggest you to google or youtube the words 'toxic parents'. You would be surprised by the results. I do hope that you never come across toxic people in your life.... Ignorance is bliss they say.... By the way calling someone shitty without knowing their perspective is a sign of being toxic....
another sign is especially for me, if you have the sudden urge to throw your phone at the wall upon receiving a text from a certain person, that person might be toxic.
Its really hard to deal with a toxic person especially when its a family member. You can't easily cut ties to them. And the fact that I can't easily get rid of them makes me even more triggered with depression and anxiety.
It is hard to deal with toxic family members. Remember this, their toxicity will either rub of onto you or it will destroy you. What toxic family members are not offering you is love, they are using you. You are no more than an item to be used to them. They do not care about your feelings. Sadly, you have to accept them as they are and as soon as you can remove yourself, it’s not easy, you deserve better, you are worth more x
At this point in my life toxic people to me are wounded people. I pray that all toxic people get the help they need so they don’t hurt themselves or others anymore.
@@swatisaini6447 Patreon gives you time-travel? 🤔 Joking aside, either TH-cam should give 2x timestamps (one for release to Members/Patreons and one for general release) or should just list the date it was first published.
@@hectorandem2944 pateron is linked to TH-cam. They post video on pateron but it's released on TH-cam then it becomes available to public on whatever the date they set so comments also get published.
This is so crazy. I was just being treated like this by a friend I went out of state to help. I couldn't take it anymore, so I came back. She made me seem like a bad person and kept putting subliminal messages on her social media. I was talking to her and letting her know I cared about her and she put up laughing emoji. It pissed me off and I told her how I felt about her making me the bad guy when I left because she kept yelling at me and the things she would say to me and about me to other people. She then sent 5 voice messages that basically were insults. The crazy thing is in 1 of the messages she said, "So you think you're going to stand up to me?" I was like, "wow...that's basically her admitting that she was taking advantage of me." Cause I mean how can I "stand up" to someone unless they are taking advantage of me? She still managed to make it sound like I was the problem even after saying that. She also made everything my fault. Like she shopped all day and then made it my fault that she didn't make much money from working by a certain time(She only did 1 or 2 food deliveries. How is it my fault she shopped all day?)
Quit my job.. Bad timing, right? I heard someone say, "I'm TIRED OF BEING TIRED". One Toxic boss after another. Last boss said, "all the stuff I said and did to you?...Nothing Personal". Tired.
I’m really hoping this video will give me the confidence to get rid of my toxic friends - they’ve forgotten my birthday several years in a row but they always manipulate me into forgiving them by telling me that by leaving them, I’d be hurting their feelings. they keep hurting me but I’d feel too guilty leaving them
I hope you will be able to. It seems you're halfway there, to making that decision. Once you realise that there's more stress and pain with them then without, even though you may feel lonely or sad initially, you'll probably feel much better once they're out of your life and can't have any negative impact upon you anymore. Now you know the signs, you're more likely to recognise them earlier on, so you can avoid relationships and friendships with toxic people.
My father was toxic with narcissistic personality disorder and made my life a living hell for 65 years as I was the one he gaslit. I thought that, when he died, my life would start - how wrong could I be??? I feel his presence still and, a burning anger that somehow, he "got away with it" by dying!! I've since discovered that, before he died, he forged my signature and, as a trustee, he defrauded me of over £100k from my pension pot - and "distributed" this (along with the rest of his estate) to my 2 sisters (who got £500k each - I got £10). He knew that I'd either have to sue my siblings or live in penury in retirement (I chose the latter). It's a sad fact that, even when these terrible people are dead, their cruelty lives on. Personally, I don't have a clue how to rid myself of his toxic presence - despite his demise!! Thanks for listening ...💔
@@kashvirshah3408 my life improved sooo much, I started getting fewer depressive episodes, I started to become more physically healthy, and even became a more open person
Sometimes toxic people can drag you down to their level if you tolerate them too much.. you wont know until you find youself behaving like them and being miserable and so hateful towards yourself.please be careful
I have two toxic females in my immediate family. You dread being around them, you can’t trust anything they do or say because they lie, they talk behind your back, they never admit they are wrong about anything, they are not rational, you can’t carry conversation because they get offended easily, and they are short tempered; they are very suspicious.
*1 they abuse you* (can be both emotionally and physically) *2 they are manipulative* (they are often lying) *3 they exploit you* (use your good nature against yourself) *4 they take things out on you* *5 they never compromise* *6 they always play the victim card* (don't want to take responsibility for their actions) Stay safe everyone and hope this helped 💞
Your "good nature" can be just an excuse to try and keep people "sweet" and "on your side" and support your view of yourself as a "Nice Person". Of itself, it is also borderline manipulative. It can also be a survival technique, particularly as regards abusive households and parents, or someone who has authority over you in some way. Perfectly understandable, and kids use this survival technique all the time, when a parent is angry at them. However, as young adults or adults, we don't need to carry this onwards if the relationship is obviously abusive. You don't have to curry favor from someone who has never supported you in any way, has never been a rock to lean on in hard times, or hasn't ever had a good word to say to you. You do not need their so-called approval of you in any way. So they can literally call you every name under the sun because you won't help them move/give cash, or give them whatever it is they want, and it simply does not matter. Block/no contact/walk away.
I was once in your situation with an ex-fiance. I knew that what he was doing was deplorable, every one of my friends and family knew he was toxic, but I had it in my head that I could help him change for the better.
Sucks when you're friends with someone who was fake-nice who just thought of your friendship as a game. They make you feel like the toxic one because they don't want to take responsibility, and when they apologize it isn't real because there's always an accusation in there.
Seriously blows having to apologize to someone who instigated the shit in the first place just to keep peace and prevent whatever from getting worse. So draining.
Dated a man a fell for him hard...a year of feeling like I met my dream guy...then I found out he was morally bankrupt and willing to abandon loyalty, morality, and integrity (along with our relationship) just to satisfy his ego and need for validation from random girls. Confronted with the drama and harm he caused, he says "I realize now I never should have tried to put myself in a situation like that" (vs. accountability and remorse). He shows back up after a year of us being split, acts like he cares, then retells our breakup story to me as if lying and cheating were MY problem and that I just "never knew him". Toxic people are cowards who don't know themselves. They always have something to prove, that they will always care less and have the upper hand because you're disposable. The sad part, that's not usually how they actually feel (unless they're sociopaths/Narcs). They betray themselves and ruin their own lives. Our job is to stop rewarding their behaviour by saying we will leave, creating boundaries, and not sticking to them. It's so hard when people let us down, but our value should never be taken for granted by such individuals. Their loss, I promise.
You hit the nail on the head. It’s very hurtful to be taken advantage of, especially when your tensions were always good/pure for the well-being of someone you truly cared for. Truth is they self sabotage and are destined to live a lonely, hellish life. Compassionate people, true friends are trouble by this as they truly are genuine in the desire to help. However, the harsh reality is that they can’t. One MUST SAVE THEMSELVES or face the consequences of FORFEITING your own peace, wellbeing & happiness for someone who is just incapable of giving a shit.
My father has all these qualities...and I recently stopped talking to him even though we are in the same house as I had resigned my job last month to change my career path. And the changes are very clear now. I am getting very less irritated unlike earlier. I am feeling at peace and don't even have a brain filled with anger now. Even yesterday he abused me due to some silly reason that I am playing a video out as I couldn't find earphones. Surprisingly I didn't get irritated much..as my mind is more stable now...I just moved to other room
I used to have an ex like this and I tried being friends with them afterward (I knew them for 11 years) and it only got worse. I had to cut ties with them..
I can relate to your situation. I thought about it before, but I mean how can you be friends with an ex? like someone who didn't treat you in a good way when you were in a relationship with them, that's why it ended and then how do you expect they will treat you in a good way after it ends? 😅
I believe everyone is toxic. We all just have different levels of it. And improvement varies on that persons self awareness and the motivation to improve
@@breakingpoint3893 trust and believe they do. They will admit it but won't take accountability. And when they admit their fault. Is for a reason. Or reasons.
I've always tried to help a "toxic friend", when everyone else turned their backs on her (for actually good reasons)... I knew who she was, but still, she had amazing qualities, so I insisted on keeping the friendship. The result? She basically stepped on me (metaphorically) at the moment I needed the most lmao, kinda tragic. I've always believed that everyone has a good side, but after experiences like this, I've learned an important lesson... indeed, people can be good, but sometimes the bad side is so visible and harmful that we can't deal with it. So, the best decision is to step back.
Ugh people like that are pathetic. They'd probably have more friends if they learned a little loyalty. Sorry you had that experience, you sound like a much bigger person than them.
I have spent the last two years trying to help an autistic friend with a bad drinking problem ,a complete nightmare, I have tried everything you name it ,cycling 9 miles the other day in the pouring rain, and spending over an hour with a work colleague, to get him some help ,we found some numbers for him to ring ,plus some information etc ,that very day ,he told me that he rang the numbers ,they do not exist ,and through them into the bin ,at this point I now realise it is pointless, and all it is doing to me is draining me ,and so I now have to step back ,and put me energy etc .into my voluntary charity work .
I used to be best friends with this girl who turned out to be really toxic. In the beginning, she was really fun and relatable. Over time, she started to change and use me. I had to reflect and tell my family members what was going on in order to see how toxic she was. She wasn’t just like that with me, I would later come to know she had done the same with a lot of my close friends. I’m glad I cut her off.
maintain your emotional distance from them, maintain your boundaries, respect your individuality, don't allow them to control you, understand they will be negative towards you just shrug your shoulders ,& let it go & don't worry about it knowing they have a toxic agenda. keep your balance & LIVE YOUR life.
I had a toxic friend who applied to ALL OF THESE. He stole from me, made excuses, made fun of me, talked behind my back, tried to got me in trouble, and killed my happiness, EVERY SINGLE DAY. Can anyone apply??
same here, friend for 13 years then girlfriend for 2 years. Left her last night, and no loss of sleep. She lost a best friend and lover. Feeling awesome....peace!
Most of these people are miserable,they live a sad and depressed life. So they take their anger out on everyone. I've seen these traits,especially the double standards and that is the worst one in my opinion. Just cut them off permanently. Staying with them will only drain you mentally and emotionally,you will end up straying away from your purpose in life.
one of my best friends does most of the things mentioned in the video, but idk how to cut them off, since we are in the same friend group and i have no friends to go if i get kicked out :( most other people are in there own groups, and i just don’t get along with them, so i’m going to stay in this friend group until i can try to become better friends with people... i don’t think its going to happen though honestly. i’m not good at making friends.
@@evelyn-bz7hv cut them off, I had to cut off a Friend of 6 years because of this. At first I felt so alone like no one to talk to no where to go,, then gradually I started to gather myself, minding my own business, studies etc. In this way I became brave and independent, I drastically improved in studies, I spent more time in my hobbies. Such things helped to boost my confidence and self esteem. Friends are not friends if the only thing they do is to use you, and make you emotionally weak so that you go back to them even after getting hurt by them. Wish this helps you, all the best.
@Hasu Kim - It's important to set and maintain clear boundaries with toxic people, even a parent. It's good you recognise that he is, and can now identify the signs, so you can avoid relationships with others who display the same signs. Often when we grow up with dysfunctional parents, that becomes our "normal" and, unaware of the potential harm, we tend to repeat it by unconsciously seeking out others who are similar. Start to identify *your* needs and limits, so you can set boundaries with him, and learn ways to end conversations that are disrespectful, abusive and pushing your limits, while maintaining your dignity. That way you can heal, regain your personal power and autonomy, and hopefully have a respectful relationship with him. If not, distancing yourself may be your next best option.
@Ayontica Banerjee - It's a startling revelation when you realise that you possess similar traits as a parent who has been harmful towards you. It's a learned behaviour, as it was role-modelled to you by your parent, so it's no surprise that you'd pick up on some of it as well. Fortunately, recognising that within yourself is the first step to being able to change your thoughts and behaviours so that you're not acting in ways that impact others negatively. You can choose to change how you perceive or judge things, and how to treat people, and yourself, better.
@@ayonticabanerjee8326 it was a similar process for me. I lost all my friends, lost belief in humanity, everything became a game of power and manipulation, but the crippling depression was a wake up call because I could feel my useless ego puffing up for no reason. Hurting others hurts us it's double edged sword. Then I surrendered to depression. I lost it all, no motivation to live or do anything. I could see myself standing on a an edge of a tall building a few months down the line. It was simply unable to imagine any other future for myself. Just like a flame about to go out burns brighter, I decided to give a last go, and invested myself fully in a play our college was making for a competition. My teacher had a bad impression of me through and through because I was very inconsistent with classes since I had lost all interest in life, it was just so hard to take myself and mover every morning just to see people who either ignored me or looked down on me or just used me and left. But there was a senior, i guess he somehow noticed something during play, and started to talk with me. Just study things, and research paper talk, some time pass talk nothing serious or emotional. Then one day we decided to meet up for the same, and I guess he deliberately kept changing the topic to other things. We ended up talking for a whole day, and honestly I was kind of alarmed. Because I didn't feel bad, I was comfortable, and somehow my trust in him became unshakable because I soon trusted his logic more than mine. We would discuss everything about the work, he would be able to understand what I wanted to say when I didn't even know what I was saying, but I consistently avoided emotional topics. And one time he ended up getting hurt bad because I trusted another person who was wrong person to trust in that situation. That day, I cried after years. Just because of a single look we passed. I'm such a stupid, I couldn't even bring myself to say sorry.. I just kept waiting around... Somehow just be there. It was like that for two three days or so. I kept being around but I wasn't even able to talk to him again. And he took the initiative again. After that, I apologies multiple times. After that guilt.. I tried to cut him off. Because I was so afraid of hurting someone. Quarantine with the narcissist was taking toll on me too. That fucker is so patient, after a month of no calls from me he suddenly called and kept asking me to speak. Until I cried and blurted somethings out finally. I put all this just to say, believe. It's okay to hurt, and be depressed, just try and please voice your emotions, so many times people are waiting. I hope this will help somehow. Good luck on your journey👍
Wish i had seen something like this a decade ago 'cause i had the displeasure of dealing with some evil, evil people. I can practically guarantee i'd be a radically different person had i not met them.
What’s worse is the health effects of toxic people on sane healthy people. Girl I talked to for two months made me feel so awful. The hot and cold of her interest. The committing non-commitment. Talking to this guy and that guy. The white lies, not remember things said. She has pretty poor mental health and depression as well. The family problems, the drama, the dynamics. How can your life have no peace? They will drag your life into a place that constantly pumps your body with stress hormones, each day, everyday, all day long. I asked a straight question about us, to which led to a small argument, and she blocked me. Yeah it felt awful being blocked, by someone you care about, but as all those stress chemicals shut off, my real self emerged again. It was a real blessing. Took a week or two but my body is finally back to normal chemicals again. Unless she gets therapy and medication, never again. Never.
I think the most important distinction between a toxic person and a flawed person is awareness too. A lot of toxic people will be willfully ignorant to their own toxicity and try to pretend that they aren’t doing anything bad. Most people who exhibit these traits I find are more often than not just unaware that they’re doing it and would likely at least try to work on being better if they were made aware. That’s why I generally disagree with the “just cut them out of your life” solution. Cutting people out or distancing yourself from them entirely should never be the first step, as that often has much more devastating consequences on the other person than people like to admit. In some cases it can make the person suicidal. It’s always better to first talk with this person clearly about their behavior and let them know how they’re affecting you, then if things remain unchanged start easing them out of your life. Severing ties with people should be a last resort rather than a solution.
I have met toxic people almost half my life now, even if we try to help them out with their problems and make them value themselves they don't do it for themselves they're far too obsessed thinking their problems are just bigger than everyone and everything. Always with the victim mindset. I've literally just dropped a toxic person, I don't want to be devalued for my looks, personality and feelings, I will not hesitate to call anyone out if they do so.
I have a cousin who is constantly using the lamest excuses to not hang out with me and others such as faking depression, she is always like “Sorry I’m kinda having a mental breakdown every night and I’m also tired so no.” She has also admitted that she was jealous of me a couple of times in the past not to mention she talked badly behind my back TWICE and used the lame excuse, “I just got ahead of myself.” She is always competitive and whenever I achieve something she tells me that she should’ve done it and that she would have done better. Whenever I tell someone about it like my parents they just tell me that I’m overreacting.
I had friends who acted this Way. I left them. I was guilty for everything what bad happened in their life. I could just sit and breathe and it‘s my fault, that they lost their job for example. persons like them never deserved me.
Feel the same. Someone who creates their own tried to drag me down to their lower level... So I learned a new take on a saying That Misery NEEDS Company. And I am not going to stoop that low to keep them company.
As an extreme introvert, I don’t usually say this out loud, but I’m glad I don’t have friends. I’m toxic enough to my own self, I don’t need to drag others down with me 😅.
@Trish Hamilton Sounds like labeling yourself as “toxic” actually may not be accurate at all. Why do that to yourself? Sounds like there may be other things going on related to you being an extreme introvert.
Definitely experienced a lot of this, I felt the brunt of it often so I walked away They had the nerve to tell me if I walk away there’s no returning and I calmly responded I wouldn’t They had a way of keeping me in their web of chaos by gaslighting and guilt tripping me
This screams my EX. As much as I tried to work is out & I believed him when he will change. No...it didn’t happen. I was losing my mind. I never experienced so much stress that caused my anxiety attacks from that relationship. I loved him but I love me more. Praying for him to notice that he needs to change or he’ll end up alone.
People don't change. They just stop doing what they used to do for a while. Given the right triggers they will do it again. We see that issue clearly in addicts but it's in all of us. Given the right motivator we can pause the negative behaviour but when we are no longer motivated we do what comes natural to us.
I’m not in a relationship with a guy but me and my mother got the most toxics relationship, and everything she said in this video I related to everything
Well that answers my question. I did indeed have toxic friends and I was also beginning to act a like them, and i noticed and did not like it. I have been distancing myself for around a year and I have never felt better. My mental is better and I feel very free
#7 They turn people against each other and then play both sides because *a)* they want to appear as the upright objective peacekeeper ("the good guy") and *b)* Gives them more control, and emotional leverage in situations
Me realising that I was toxic in Primary school through Yr 7. Thank goodness that I’ve changed for the better. I’m actually so proud that I can re asses my past actions😃
I wish people would've told me about those things earlier as everyone call you toxic but they never care to explain on why. I must thank that one person who was kind enough to send me this video.
Scary to the point… I’m beyond drained. There was only one incident in my life 10 years ago I felt as drained and exhausted like this. Thanks for that topic.
i have recently ended a friendship after my friend did most of the thing you just described. In the end, she is still placing the blame on me and shamed me for hurting her feelings. I was actually having doubts about this friendship for a while now, my only regret is that I didn't end this friendship sooner. for as long as it lasted, it was a good friendship. There were signs at the early stage that suggested she is incredibly selfish. I wish i believed in those signs then.
I'm so angry that I just perceive that a "friend" that i had was so freaking toxic, and at a time she just left me and i felt that it was my fault. Now I understand that she just wanted to use me for her's problems and, when I wasn't useful, she abandoned me. 🙄😡
Two years ago I realized my so called best friend was toxic and was meddling in my relationship with my partner even going as far as to tell us lies about each other and gaslighting me. The past years have not been easy but I'm thankful both of us cut this mess of a person out of our lives.
My “friend” I see is playing the victim card. Again and again people “wrong her” or mistreat and “say bad things” about her, cheat her, lie to her or “abuse” her two pet animals (such as in grooming them or medically treating them).
Same. I lost my bestfriend. All along I am blaming myself for the things that happened. I got low self esteem. But I realize, no. It wasn't my fault. I know I just did the right thing. To save myself and my ex-bestfriend. In the end, I still cared not just for myself but also for that person.
I've never forgotten a couple of lines of script in a frame on a wall in the despatch office of a foodservice distributor when I happened to call there more than 20 years ago: 'Some bring pleasure to a room full of people when they enter; others when they leave.' Everyone should ask themselves which category they fit into.
PS: Please whoever reading this, read it till the end and kindly learn from my experience.. if you see any of these signs in someone just do yourself a favour by limiting your relationship with them.. I had a toxic friend in my life.. which I got rid of a few months back... We've been friends for almost 3 years and I can't overcome the fact that what I have done to myself just for her, I totally lost myself by compromising for her, being submissive, being controlled and overall only caring for her. In these years, I didn't even cared for my health, my happiness because I was so busy caring for her .. And all of these signs are so accurate.. she had all of them.. Ah! I just can't forget it.. it's still painful to think about those past 3 years. I have lost so much time and energy. I have compromised so much on my health and happiness.
My mother in law who passed away three weeks ago today was a very toxic towards me and my husband. She was bipolar and had dementia until her death. She was mentally abusive , a control freak, she threatened us constantly Guilt trips. She tried everything In Her power to break up our marriage, I now know how toxic she was. We lived with this for 29 years. I can say that I hope she rests it peace.this informed of the to ic warning signs. Thank you.
@@Ann4b3l Kicking toxic people out is kind of cruel. Imagine having no friends, just because your more different then the status quo. people constantly say i don't know what you're talking but, but they arn't really listening, even if they say they do, and they don't reply to it at all. autistics constantly have this problem. nobody really listens but they say they do, but they never speak back too you. you don't have to be constantly on edge all the time. people tend to overreact and take you literally which is dumb. how do you see from both sides if they don't, tell you there side. humans are weird.
my friend constantly gets mad when I don't ask them to hang out but they never want to go anywhere except for their house. I'm often really busy because I'm trying to work on myself or get homework done. I'm always scared to say no to hanging out because they'll start a whole arguement and make me feel terrible.
You got to stand up to them. Tell them you have a life outside theirs and your wants and needs are just as important as theirs. Tell them you know their trying to guilt trip you. Its ok to say no. I'd even advise cutting them from your life completely. If they do this regularly, no good can come from it. Trust me. If they play the victim and say their "going through something" don't fall for it. (unless they actually r and its serious). Wish you the best dude
I'm here to figure out if I act like a toxic person
Same. Apparently, I am somewhat of a toxic person.
Same. I don't even need to watch this to know that I'm toxic. :(
I'm trying to change for the better though. Hoping it'll work.
If not, then I'm doomed
@@beanboy6664 me too. the one about making people feel bad because I'm not okay; I do that so often and it's like automatic. I'm trying to change it. Hope you can do better too!
Same... I know I got some trait of a toxic person.. I can't be perfect but I will try my best to become a better person ^^
@@communistcat3226 you'll find a way. At fist, try being kind with small actions and good luck!!
I can tell when someone is toxic, when they aren't in the room, and there is no drama.
Good point!
yes, and when they’re out of the room you feel free. they drain you
I was always happy when the toxic person in the office was on vacation or on a day off during the week. The workday went so much better!
If this is true, then my mom is definitely toxic
True
The sad thing is that toxic people/bullies often don't realize that they are toxic, thus they don't try to change.
Yup...
Yeah that's the problem in this world, everybody wanna play victim and act stupid and act like they don't know what's going on!
It's not that they aren't told they are, it's just that they feel it's either overreactions and oversensitivity, or generally that they don't believe it. And even if they do, they won't care unless they're confronted by someone who they care about. I've been one myself a few years ago, that's why I recognise it so well.
They refused to take responsibility and admit what they have done to us! They are disgusting suckers!
You'd be surprised. Some are really deluded and others - the worst ones - know full well what they do.
It's sad when the actual toxic person makes YOU feel like the toxic person.
Krissy V. That's known as gaslighting.
I know what Thís is like what you are saying
Because They did all this to me
They played the victim and acused me of it
Champion Tonto the Wonder Horse not always. My most recent ex was so anxious and insecure about herself that she put me as the sole source of her happiness and clung to me to the extreme. I tried to keep up. It was completely emotionally and mentally draining. She would manipulate me in different ways to get even more attention by trying to play with my emotions in negative ways. She was completely toxic to me and made me feel toxic by needing space and trying to have to firmly stick to my needs. I feel like a complete asshole even though I didn’t mean it in any kind of toxic way. I constantly felt like I had to walk on eggshells to the point I felt like I couldn’t even communicate with her for fear of hurting her. She was also extremely good at playing the victim card. Toxic people come in many different forms and they don’t always gaslight. There’s plenty of other ways people can be toxic.
Oh yeah like that one time my ex cheated on me and said she basically had the right to because I glanced at a girl in the street.
Yup, just went through that. It's so mentally draining.
I feel so bad for people who are quarantining with toxic people.
Take piece of mind by thinking of the toxic people who are stuck with other toxic people. 😂
I shouldn't laugh really, most of them don't have the ability to realise that they are toxic people.
Mmm yep my grandma sometimes
My sister finally went to college so I’m lucky
It really sucks
Ugh I want to get rid of him
To everyone reading this, I hope you find happiness in new friends who are not toxic.
I just realized that i may be a toxic dude to my best friend. Maybe my friend is or its me. idk man, its like a roller coaster :0
I literally just dropped a toxic friend and I see this I- it feels relieving almost because their actions will always speak louder than their words no matter how "sorry" and how much they "love" you
@The Khool Guy the truth, they'll come around and say sorry and then do the same thing or even worse
Good for you! I hope you'll find a healthy friend that will care for you and won't hurt you. You did great 💪
@@hel2727 thank you so much and i hope so!
same here, friend for 13 years then girlfriend for 2 years. Left her last night, and no loss of sleep. She lost a best friend and lover. Feeling awesome....peace!
@The Khool Guy Your toxic people apologise? Mine just told me I suck for making them feel bad when I call them out, or just manipulated me into believing I'm the bad one in that situation.
1. Abusive
2. Manipulative
3. Exploiting
4. Take things out on you
5. Never compromise
6. Play the victim
I had a few toxic people in my life and didn't know why they acted the way they do. I kept trying to be so nice to them...but it didn't work. I love my cat... she is such a sweetheart. I love to be with her everyday.... I wish people would be so nice and lovable like my cat. 🐈
Thank you! God bless you!
@@cherylann1602 yes and really become unsettled when self help gurus will tell you that these people are reflecting your own energy at you and all you have to do is love or nice it away and voila.
That's my older sister.😐
I want to become toxic to make other people feel bad for hurting me
Dated a girl who was like this. It was awful. I feel for anyone going through that. The most exhausting period of time in my life.
A lot of women I've dated have been toxic as second nature. They were not even aware they were toxic and abusive--because all their friends were the same way.
Dump them immediately....within two months of dating....tell them why..even if the truth hurts.....tell them
At least you only dated them and you know what to look out for. I married& had kids... They're very good at some of these traits. I didn't realize what was happening for a long time.
@@mjc4942 I married into it, her son is this video personified, but mommy wipes away his tears ( for35 years now) and tells him it’s not his fault, he’s perfect,...I’ve had more than enough, it’s the same reheated drama, over and over and......
Been there done that.. it’s emotionally draining to deal with these people.
"I will stop, "
"I wont do it again, "
"Im sorry, "
I heard that 100000 of times and they never stop
When will YOU stop giving them another chance?
💔
@@yolanda3883 i have no chose.
I have to live with my mom
@@daniellemarcheterre7336 I'm sorry that you're going through that. Terrible when it's the one person that is supposed to love you and protect you. I hope you have some kind of support. Please take care of yourself. ❤
@@yolanda3883 awww. Thx ❤
you too
I relate to that, Snowy Wolfie. I hope you can find the right people around you.
My sister is toxic, and we recently had a huge fight. She threatened to cut me out of her life if I didn’t “validate her feelings better.” I ended up blocking her, and I feel like I can finally breathe....
i have 2 like that
Stopped talking to my sister 12 years ago....best decision I’ve ever made. Family isn’t always “family”
Yes did the same and feeling so relieved and having peace
I am so proud of you!👏👏👏👏
@@missyidontgiveacrap9939 blood of the covenant is thicker than water of the womb
This video helped me realise that there were some people in my life who were toxic. Those people are gone now, which explains why I am happier and healthier.
Good.👏👏👏
A toxic person wouldn’t watch this, everyone is here only because we wanted to see if we are/ make sure we aren’t toxic our selves.
You can't speak for anyone but yourself.
@@carolynjanesutton4932 nah i came here for me and one other person so they at least speak for me too
Yes , although I find myself very depressed and pushing people away because of my tendency to attract toxic people...
A small part of me is checking I dont ever fall in these lines..
I worry I have inherited the bad Gene's from my toxic mother and sister ...
I often ask my husband if I am anything like them...
Luckily ,..no so far
@@fredeemoon6053 it's good of you to keep track of your emotions and patterns to make sure you're not harming anyone. but make sure nobody is harming you either
@@softwaterlily
Yes I agree
Should be part of school curriculum , teaching kids what to look out for...
I'm fed up that I learnt all too late
It’s so easy to get into the trap of thinking a toxic person will change, but it’s a much better idea to avoid them.
If you can...if it's in your work or your neighbor...it is really not easy to don't punch them.
Its like a rotten meat in the fridge. The sooner you throw it out the better otherwise risking dying from food poisoning or the fridge will be a big mess and stinky
In my life i never ever meet any toxic person. Everyone has an issues, no one is perfect. So PLEASE DO NOT GENERALISE PEOPLE CALLING THEM TOXIC. If you meet someone difficult to deal with Let them go on their way. Leave them without calling them anything. Work on yourself, dont keep blaming others.
Sorry to say, but this kind of videos make us like, and helpful to leave someone, but not realy telling a truth. You might be toxic for someone else. In these days no one is thinking about dealing with problems and solving them, everyone is in rush to END the problems.
@@remabarve .
Toxic people exist.This is not because you never face them, they doesn't exist and people desserve to be aware of it, for they safety.
rambo If you’ve never met a toxic person in your life then you have no idea what you’re talking about, so please be quiet.
My whole family shows all these signs of being toxic. I have walked away from my family and gone NO CONTACT. LIFE IS GREAT NOW 😊😊😊
I realized that I can be toxic at times but I feel guilty about it & I'm trying to change. We can all improve ourselves & do better. Good luck to everyone who feels the same way 💗
no ur not toxic ur just flawed. toxic people NEVER change and will NEVER realize that they are toxic. If you thinks you are toxic then you are wrong or you may be a victum of a toxic person, because toxic people will also make you feel like YOu are toxic.
Hi Reema. I totally understand. I think you can really explore that question with a very good friend who will be honest with you. Just ask them. I've done that with my wife from time to time in case I have some blind spots. She's honest with me.....sometimes brutally honest. But, I give her that permission so that I can improve myself.
Someone called me toxic so I guess I might as well try and change
I am also in the journey of self-analyzation trying to figure out how to not have toxic tendencies. I want to change just struggling in that aspect. Wishing you all the best in your growth.
I've been toxic almost my entire life. It was the only thing I'd known but I decided to change and broke patterns and I improved as a person. Now I'm assertive and I can set boundaries (a big reason why I was toxic and I let toxic people get into my life). So, you can change and do better. Acceptance is the first step. You go, girl!😁❤
The most important thing about toxic people is to make sure you aren't one of them
Exactly! You really don't want to stoop down to their level.
My ex boyfriend was like this.
It's so easy to get away with things when you act all cute and innocent. That was him. To everyone else, he was this sweet, small, innocent little boy. So everyone always felt pity for him. Including me. Because of this, it made it a lot harder for me to see he wasn't a good person.
Every single day, for almost a year. He guilt tripped me. He never said it directly, but he basically showed me that "if you leave me, I'll kill myself". It was horrifying. So I never broke up with him. That's right, never. He was the one who left me. Which is good, honestly, because if he hadn't, I would have never left him. I truly loved him. And I won't lie, that feeling still lingers. It makes me sick.
He had many problems in his life. I'm not saying those things weren't real, in fact, I have proof that it's real. But he always used it to make me feel really bad for him. His dad abuses him. Physically, emotionally, and verbally. I've heard the audio messages. I was constantly worried about him.
He never did anything in return. He said he loved me and all that, but I know that, like how it was mentioned in the video, he did that to make me think he cared about me. And hell, it really worked.
When he broke up with me, I was angry. I had done everything for him, I was willing to drop everything for him, and for what? He used that to make it look like I was a toxic person. Like it was me who was manipulating and using him. Like it was me who guilt tripped him. One of his friends messaged me saying exactly that. And I fucking believed it. It only took a conversation with my friends to realize otherwise. Oh, and also, he tried to turn my own friends against me. He tried to convince my friends, the ones who had it been for them, I wouldn't be here, that I was the bad guy. Thankfully, my friends are smart enough to recognize that that wasn't the case. I still have them. I couldn't imagine what would've happened if his manipulation worked on them. I would've lost everything. I wouldn't be here typing this, I'd probably have killed myself. All because of one sick individual.
But no, no. I've got it all wrong, right? I'm the toxic one, I'm the guilt tripper. Me, loving him with all I have and being a good boyfriend to him? Never. Absolute bullshit. I'm the toxic one because I got angry at him. Of course.
I didn't think this would be so long. Thank you so much for reading this far. Please be careful when you fall for someone, and if your friends think they aren't good for you, please believe them. Don't make the same mistake I did. Love blinds you like that. So, be wary, okay?
Thanks for sharing this, that was such an emotional rollercoaster to read and I trust it wasn't easy to open up like that. 😢 It's so hard when you can't see the truth. I'm so glad you had friends to save you from that episode, though. ;)
Your ex reminds me of myself... I expected unconditional love from my BFF but when she didn't talk to me that often I exploded on her and accused her of not caring. We're not talking and I'm not sure if we'll get back together. But what you said really made me realize how much pain I gave her, and I have to thank you for the dose of empathy.
Looking back, part of the reason I "loved" her was to fill the hole inside me - by "hole" i mean the belief that I'm not loveable and that people don't want to care. (That's pretty scary to admit, considering that we saw each other as one of the most real friends we've ever had). But I've decided I'm going to move on and fill my hole so nobody else has to fall down it anymore.
I hope you're healing from everything, and know that I'm going to make a dent in the amount of toxicity our society has.
Love,
kev
Falling inlove is something every empath should be wary of. Empaths don't get the risks involved in love and marriage till it's too late.
I have a friend in a relationship similar to what you went through. It's a mix of coersive and emotional abuse. It's about control and power. His "partner" is isolating him from those who love him, myself included. I've heard his abuser screaming at him over the phone just because he was sitting in my living room. Pure possessive jealousy. As it stands now, I haven't seen him for the last 6 mos. or heard from him for the last 2 mos. I'm worried but there is nothing I can do until he throws his abuser under the bus and moves on. I will be here for him. I made him that promise. You are a survivor. Let your wounds heal and know that you have people who care. All the best as you move forward.
Sounds like my ex narcissist boyfriend.
I have been there. Just be happy that you didn't marry him. Imagine a life with that abuse - not worth it. After less than 3 yrs of marriage and 2 daughters 1 & 2, I kicked his ass out. He went on to have 2 more wives. He was an a**hole, no regrets.
Video suggestion: “How to Change yourself if you realize your behavior is toxic and hurting others.”
related video, how to transmute into a dog and becoming loving (ergo, never gonna happen)
was actually hoping on same suggestion but its better to venture around more on this trope. i think best is to start listening to those emotions like guilt, shame, regret, jealousy, anger you've been blocking out or acting too highly upon. start researching what these emotions really mean, and better ways to let them out. its good to remember we've all dealt with our own kinds of trauma and have our own coping mechanisms around it (its highly likely we've developed these tropes from parents/people surrounded by but be ready to realise just how bad these tropes were, how they affected you and those around you). its never too late to break those bad habits; find alternatives. bad habits take a long while to break permanently so might be worth making part of routine with alarms for journalling, meditation, soothing music, going for a walk, etc. for me i was dealing with a lot of anger so once found calmness through that i felt okay. it'll also be worth looking up defense mechanisms, when these are too high we start to block out everything and rely too much on denial. realise when its time to be quiet, we don't always have to fill these silences with own "witty" comments.
I think a toxic person would never think that the problem comes from them. Also, trying to convince someone that is toxic that they are toxic, is like trying to convince a crazy person that they are crazy. And all of us can have toxic behaviors that we're not aware of, but it doesn't necessarily makes us toxic people, it's like a scale of toxicity. The solution is that we have to love ourselves and set boundries with people.
@@DARAxxi21 thanks. Like your comment. It’s a sign of maturity, something I see lacking at times in some of these comments.
Hey guys im a new youtuber and I just made a short video about toxic people its a bit different but if it catches your mind I would appreciate the support❤
Sign 1: They grief your house in Minecraft
True 😅
Your house can't be griefed, if you have no friends ;)
I would like this but it has 69 likes
@@helixxmusic 96 now 😓
My friend actually does that-
They make you feel like your alone when your with them
Amen!!
Me: *is relating to all of the signs *
My brain: *chuckles I’m in danger*
Same
YUP. Same😓💀
You abuse others?
@Sivert no, no, no I’m relating to this because some of my friends are doing these things
@@MrOliverLyons My advice its analyze the situation of each friend and watch how u feel in the scenario of they dont do X or Y things to you, if u feel an intermediate relief thats a huge sign you should cut them out of ur life. Nostalgic may play against you, since you will remember the good times and will make that a reason to dont cut them out, but really, those good moments doesnt allow them to treat u bad the rest of the time.
I cut out a friendship cuz i felt ignored, only noticed when he needed/want something and would leave me without reply just because. Last time i invited him to a water park, he saw the msg, and replied 10 days later. I know he have some social and trust issues, i understood that but it was a friendship of a decade, and i didnt want to feel bad, and feel like i would have to wait for them to show me some affection/appreciation/care/interest in having me in his life. Basically, i was begging for love and i got tired. It was a little sad but i feel so much better and im happy with the current friends i have, sometimes i noticed they do things i would normally would had to ask and beg him (old friend) to do so i realice "yeah, it wasnt really a friendship after all"
Wow perfect timing. I just ended things with someone who’s been saying homophobic things behind my back and always made me feel like shit for my weight
You did a great job fam! No toxicity allowed in this household!! Proud of you😊👍
ur gay and fat? damn you just stirred the worst combination
You are very brave for letting that person go! Well done!
If I was the president all homophobic , racist , or rude to people for no reason and made them feel bad about themselves would be in jail
This video truly resonates deep, I myself have dealt with so many toxic people in my life🦠 So much so that I decided to Create my own video on Letting Go Of TOXIC People, If you are reading this right now and you are dealing with a TOXIC person Go ahead and Watch my video th-cam.com/video/CELIIlJkdvc/w-d-xo.html
"how do you plan to deal with a toxic person in your life?" cut them off, nobody deserves that type of bullcrap in their lives.
But they come back every time
@@Ben-x8x8v lol nah only if u let them u gotta be stronger than that
I'm gonna fight back I'm not taking it anymore wanna be disloyal? Wanna abuse me? Wanna watch me cry? Wanna talk about how you are intimate with other?Wanna publicly shame me then stop crying when it happens to you😊
I went no contact, changed my cellphone number and moved away. Since I’m viewed as the problem I’m a problem solver and did what was necessary all the way around. Everyone who saw me as their problem are free now. Wasn’t that nice of me. Now I’m in the most wonderful three some called Me, Myself and I and I love all three of me 👍👍
I'm always so anxious that I'm toxic, I don't want to hurt any of my friends or family and I'm scared to death of being a toxic person
Wtf man the fuck up?
Don't worry. Being toxic to a degree where it's THAT bad, you would do it on purpose.
If you're already questioning yourself like that you're doing just fine
In my life i never ever meet any toxic person. Everyone has a issues, no one is perfect. So PLEASE DO NOT GENERALISE PEOPLE CALLING THEM TOXIC. If you meet someone difficult to deal with Let them go on their way. Leave them without calling them anything. Work on yourself, dont keep blaming others.
Sorry to say, but this kind of videos make us like, and helpful to leave someone, but not realy telling a truth. You might be toxic for someone else. In these days no one is thinking about dealing with problems and solving them, everyone is in rushing to END the problems.
When your questionong yourself then your not toxic
The fact that you care about not wanting to be toxic to those arounds you, shows you have a lot of good in you. Just keep nurturing the good and believe in yourself.
They are overtly dramatic. They can't digest food until they bring negativity on the table - the big sign of highly toxic people. Great video. Enjoyed a lot. 👍
Emotional and violent if they dont get their way ??? Give up ???
This is 100% true for a “friend” i finally unloaded yesterday. This person kept doing everything on your list but because I know them a long time,I kept them in my life. No more, I’ve had it with their heartlessness, greed, dishonesty, and selfishness. You can’t fix these people, best to cut the loose. They’re sociopathic and dangerous.
"They never compromise"
"They're manipulative"
Thats my mother right there
My parents are the same
Mine too
YES ! You are so right. I never noticed till now that they dont compromise.
Same, I tried telling them that they're toxic but they said im overeacting things
@@podmear3854 these people never change and don't tell them these things because if you did, they will just get so mad at you and hurt you again. And they will never be convinced.
my own mother is a toxic person. she always was, I just didn t want to accept it. finally after 35 years I got her out of my life and my life is getting better and better and better.... p. s.: be careful, toxic people NEVER change, just go away from them to save yourself.
100% agree..... My mother is the same....
Who's this shitty person? The way you see the person that way only it appears to be. You can never blaim your mother to be toxic. Never ever in your life.
Get back to your mother and say sorry for misunderstanding her emotions.
Before calling someone shitty, I would suggest you to google or youtube the words 'toxic parents'. You would be surprised by the results. I do hope that you never come across toxic people in your life.... Ignorance is bliss they say.... By the way calling someone shitty without knowing their perspective is a sign of being toxic....
Yeah 😭
another sign is especially for me, if you have the sudden urge to throw your phone at the wall upon receiving a text from a certain person, that person might be toxic.
Its really hard to deal with a toxic person especially when its a family member. You can't easily cut ties to them. And the fact that I can't easily get rid of them makes me even more triggered with depression and anxiety.
I’m learning languages to change country.
It is hard to deal with toxic family members. Remember this, their toxicity will either rub of onto you or it will destroy you. What toxic family members are not offering you is love, they are using you. You are no more than an item to be used to them. They do not care about your feelings. Sadly, you have to accept them as they are and as soon as you can remove yourself, it’s not easy, you deserve better, you are worth more x
It's important to recognize signs of a toxic individual early on! You prevent a lot of emotional pain and suffering. Thanks for the upload!
At this point in my life toxic people to me are wounded people. I pray that all toxic people get the help they need so they don’t hurt themselves or others anymore.
Video: 23 seconds ago
Comments: 1 month ago
TH-cam’s high again
Éireann no that’s actually legit
That's what my phone also said
Pateron members
@@swatisaini6447 Patreon gives you time-travel? 🤔
Joking aside, either TH-cam should give 2x timestamps (one for release to Members/Patreons and one for general release) or should just list the date it was first published.
@@hectorandem2944 pateron is linked to TH-cam. They post video on pateron but it's released on TH-cam then it becomes available to public on whatever the date they set so comments also get published.
This is so crazy. I was just being treated like this by a friend I went out of state to help. I couldn't take it anymore, so I came back. She made me seem like a bad person and kept putting subliminal messages on her social media. I was talking to her and letting her know I cared about her and she put up laughing emoji. It pissed me off and I told her how I felt about her making me the bad guy when I left because she kept yelling at me and the things she would say to me and about me to other people. She then sent 5 voice messages that basically were insults. The crazy thing is in 1 of the messages she said, "So you think you're going to stand up to me?" I was like, "wow...that's basically her admitting that she was taking advantage of me." Cause I mean how can I "stand up" to someone unless they are taking advantage of me? She still managed to make it sound like I was the problem even after saying that. She also made everything my fault. Like she shopped all day and then made it my fault that she didn't make much money from working by a certain time(She only did 1 or 2 food deliveries. How is it my fault she shopped all day?)
Stay away from her.
Can I your number? 🙂💯
I recently went through something like this. And it hurts.. i hope people who are going through the same thing they heal too...❤
Quit my job.. Bad timing, right? I heard someone say, "I'm TIRED OF BEING TIRED". One Toxic boss after another. Last boss said, "all the stuff I said and did to you?...Nothing Personal". Tired.
I'm very sorry for that.
I pray that you heal
Toxic bosses are horrible
I’m really hoping this video will give me the confidence to get rid of my toxic friends - they’ve forgotten my birthday several years in a row but they always manipulate me into forgiving them by telling me that by leaving them, I’d be hurting their feelings. they keep hurting me but I’d feel too guilty leaving them
I hope you will be able to. It seems you're halfway there, to making that decision. Once you realise that there's more stress and pain with them then without, even though you may feel lonely or sad initially, you'll probably feel much better once they're out of your life and can't have any negative impact upon you anymore. Now you know the signs, you're more likely to recognise them earlier on, so you can avoid relationships and friendships with toxic people.
Mikey M :D Please! Do YOURSELF A FAVOR!!!
My father was toxic with narcissistic personality disorder and made my life a living hell for 65 years as I was the one he gaslit.
I thought that, when he died, my life would start - how wrong could I be???
I feel his presence still and, a burning anger that somehow, he "got away with it" by dying!!
I've since discovered that, before he died, he forged my signature and, as a trustee, he defrauded me of over £100k from my pension pot - and "distributed" this (along with the rest of his estate) to my 2 sisters (who got £500k each - I got £10). He knew that I'd either have to sue my siblings or live in penury in retirement (I chose the latter).
It's a sad fact that, even when these terrible people are dead, their cruelty lives on.
Personally, I don't have a clue how to rid myself of his toxic presence - despite his demise!!
Thanks for listening ...💔
Sometimes, the best light you can get is from a burning bridge.
My ex bestfriend displayed 5 of these six, I'm so glad I cut ties with him
How did things change? Was it a good decision?
@@kashvirshah3408 my life improved sooo much, I started getting fewer depressive episodes, I started to become more physically healthy, and even became a more open person
Sometimes toxic people can drag you down to their level if you tolerate them too much.. you wont know until you find youself behaving like them and being miserable and so hateful towards yourself.please be careful
I have two toxic females in my immediate family. You dread being around them, you can’t trust anything they do or say because they lie, they talk behind your back, they never admit they are wrong about anything, they are not rational, you can’t carry conversation because they get offended easily, and they are short tempered; they are very suspicious.
narcissists!!! be careful !
Hi Valerie, . My mother has shown all the signs that u hv mentioned.
My Karen radar is going off (RUN SIS!)
Aldo sage the house it would help the energy around them n bring everyone up!
Well at least you recognize who and what they are...
I'd rather be on my own than bother with anyone toxic.
Yes i hear you there
Its exactly the same i am doing right now
Cause of what i have been put through
I avoid people now mostly like the plague
I currently cut my ties with a toxic family member recently, after years of going crazy!
It's sad that it didn't work out but I've never been happier.
*1 they abuse you* (can be both emotionally and physically)
*2 they are manipulative* (they are often lying)
*3 they exploit you* (use your good nature against yourself)
*4 they take things out on you*
*5 they never compromise*
*6 they always play the victim card* (don't want to take responsibility for their actions)
Stay safe everyone and hope this helped 💞
Your "good nature" can be just an excuse to try and keep people "sweet" and "on your side" and support your view of yourself as a "Nice Person". Of itself, it is also borderline manipulative. It can also be a survival technique, particularly as regards abusive households and parents, or someone who has authority over you in some way. Perfectly understandable, and kids use this survival technique all the time, when a parent is angry at them. However, as young adults or adults, we don't need to carry this onwards if the relationship is obviously abusive. You don't have to curry favor from someone who has never supported you in any way, has never been a rock to lean on in hard times, or hasn't ever had a good word to say to you. You do not need their so-called approval of you in any way. So they can literally call you every name under the sun because you won't help them move/give cash, or give them whatever it is they want, and it simply does not matter. Block/no contact/walk away.
My ex was the toxic one.
I always thought I was the toxic person in the relationship, but now I'm totally sure it wasn't my fault..
Huuggss!
Its difficult to be fully objective. It really does happens that two good enough people can become both toxic with each other
@@snowflakefrost Careful. Not everyone reacts well to hugs.
Hmmmmmmmmmmmm it takes two to tango.
It wasn’t your fault🥰
Sometimes you just need a break from someone but other times you have to cut ties permanently.
That last 2 reasons hit me so hard, I cried...my partner does this. A lot...
Are you okay?
You okay? Want to talk about it?
I was once in your situation with an ex-fiance. I knew that what he was doing was deplorable, every one of my friends and family knew he was toxic, but I had it in my head that I could help him change for the better.
2 weeks ago... wut
Time travelers
Sucks when you're friends with someone who was fake-nice who just thought of your friendship as a game. They make you feel like the toxic one because they don't want to take responsibility, and when they apologize it isn't real because there's always an accusation in there.
I've dealt with a person who is toxic and who was being fake nice to me. I'm now trying to recover from it. I'm energetically drained
@@TakerMJCSfan I'm so sorry, fake-nice people are the worst.
Seriously blows having to apologize to someone who instigated the shit in the first place just to keep peace and prevent whatever from getting worse. So draining.
Dated a man a fell for him hard...a year of feeling like I met my dream guy...then I found out he was morally bankrupt and willing to abandon loyalty, morality, and integrity (along with our relationship) just to satisfy his ego and need for validation from random girls. Confronted with the drama and harm he caused, he says "I realize now I never should have tried to put myself in a situation like that" (vs. accountability and remorse). He shows back up after a year of us being split, acts like he cares, then retells our breakup story to me as if lying and cheating were MY problem and that I just "never knew him". Toxic people are cowards who don't know themselves. They always have something to prove, that they will always care less and have the upper hand because you're disposable. The sad part, that's not usually how they actually feel (unless they're sociopaths/Narcs). They betray themselves and ruin their own lives. Our job is to stop rewarding their behaviour by saying we will leave, creating boundaries, and not sticking to them. It's so hard when people let us down, but our value should never be taken for granted by such individuals. Their loss, I promise.
You hit the nail on the head. It’s very hurtful to be taken advantage of, especially when your tensions were always good/pure for the well-being of someone you truly cared for. Truth is they self sabotage and are destined to live a lonely, hellish life. Compassionate people, true friends are trouble by this as they truly are genuine in the desire to help. However,
the harsh reality is that they can’t. One MUST SAVE THEMSELVES or face the consequences of FORFEITING your own peace, wellbeing & happiness for someone who is just incapable of giving a shit.
My father has all these qualities...and I recently stopped talking to him even though we are in the same house as I had resigned my job last month to change my career path. And the changes are very clear now.
I am getting very less irritated unlike earlier.
I am feeling at peace and don't even have a brain filled with anger now.
Even yesterday he abused me due to some silly reason that I am playing a video out as I couldn't find earphones.
Surprisingly I didn't get irritated much..as my mind is more stable now...I just moved to other room
respect for that my man keep on doing better.. 👍
I used to have an ex like this and I tried being friends with them afterward (I knew them for 11 years) and it only got worse. I had to cut ties with them..
BonBon Quemada I recently learned to never befriend a toxic ex.
@@scarletqueen6223 I typically dont befriend exes and this was the first time. I learned my lesson.
Devious way to get out of trouble😧
I can relate to your situation. I thought about it before, but I mean how can you be friends with an ex? like someone who didn't treat you in a good way when you were in a relationship with them, that's why it ended and then how do you expect they will treat you in a good way after it ends? 😅
I believe everyone is toxic. We all just have different levels of it. And improvement varies on that persons self awareness and the motivation to improve
yeah that's true and the older i got. the more it bugs me with my sister is yelling at me I'm telling her off though
You think that.
Recognizing your flaws is the opposite of toxic. Toxic people never admit fault therefore they don't believe there's anything wrong with them,
@@breakingpoint3893 trust and believe they do. They will admit it but won't take accountability. And when they admit their fault. Is for a reason. Or reasons.
Omg, I feel so sorry for you, because only a totally ignorant and uneducated person can speak this way!
I've always tried to help a "toxic friend", when everyone else turned their backs on her (for actually good reasons)... I knew who she was, but still, she had amazing qualities, so I insisted on keeping the friendship. The result? She basically stepped on me (metaphorically) at the moment I needed the most lmao, kinda tragic. I've always believed that everyone has a good side, but after experiences like this, I've learned an important lesson... indeed, people can be good, but sometimes the bad side is so visible and harmful that we can't deal with it. So, the best decision is to step back.
Same happens to me. I left them to deal with themselves.
Ugh people like that are pathetic. They'd probably have more friends if they learned a little loyalty. Sorry you had that experience, you sound like a much bigger person than them.
*If I was with a toxic person*
Toxic person:*insulting and demaning me*
Me:grabs chancla *SO U HAVE CHOSEN DEATH*
@@marinettedupaincheng4749 not as easy as you think.
I have spent the last two years trying to help an autistic friend with a bad drinking problem ,a complete nightmare, I have tried everything you name it ,cycling 9 miles the other day in the pouring rain, and spending over an hour with a work colleague, to get him some help ,we found some numbers for him to ring ,plus some information etc ,that very day ,he told me that he rang the numbers ,they do not exist ,and through them into the bin ,at this point I now realise it is pointless, and all it is doing to me is draining me ,and so I now have to step back ,and put me energy etc .into my voluntary charity work .
I used to be best friends with this girl who turned out to be really toxic. In the beginning, she was really fun and relatable. Over time, she started to change and use me. I had to reflect and tell my family members what was going on in order to see how toxic she was. She wasn’t just like that with me, I would later come to know she had done the same with a lot of my close friends. I’m glad I cut her off.
maintain your emotional distance from them, maintain your boundaries, respect your individuality, don't allow them to control you, understand they will be negative towards you just shrug your shoulders ,& let it go & don't worry about it knowing they have a toxic agenda. keep your balance & LIVE YOUR life.
I just realized how almost everyone in my life is toxic including myself... thanks for the upload😔😃
"you become the people you surround yourself with"
@@obuma6459 well there's the case of Jesus Christ
@@obuma6459 that's my boy..................😅
I had a toxic friend who applied to ALL OF THESE. He stole from me, made excuses, made fun of me, talked behind my back, tried to got me in trouble, and killed my happiness, EVERY SINGLE DAY. Can anyone apply??
same here, friend for 13 years then girlfriend for 2 years. Left her last night, and no loss of sleep. She lost a best friend and lover. Feeling awesome....peace!
@@AzarroFineArts I'm happy for you. This is possibly the best outcome of your situation and the last words in your comment are so true.
Thankfully I don’t have toxic friends
*the thing is it is not my friends it is my parents*
@@AzarroFineArts good for you my man! I hope you are doing well!
@@laletraa8650 I'm so sorry! Is there anything I can do to help? I feel so bad!
Most of these people are miserable,they live a sad and depressed life. So they take their anger out on everyone. I've seen these traits,especially the double standards and that is the worst one in my opinion. Just cut them off permanently. Staying with them will only drain you mentally and emotionally,you will end up straying away from your purpose in life.
Sometime there is no way to cut them off.
one of my best friends does most of the things mentioned in the video, but idk how to cut them off, since we are in the same friend group and i have no friends to go if i get kicked out :(
most other people are in there own groups, and i just don’t get along with them, so i’m going to stay in this friend group until i can try to become better friends with people... i don’t think its going to happen though honestly. i’m not good at making friends.
@@evelyn-bz7hv cut them off, I had to cut off a Friend of 6 years because of this. At first I felt so alone like no one to talk to no where to go,, then gradually I started to gather myself, minding my own business, studies etc. In this way I became brave and independent, I drastically improved in studies, I spent more time in my hobbies. Such things helped to boost my confidence and self esteem. Friends are not friends if the only thing they do is to use you, and make you emotionally weak so that you go back to them even after getting hurt by them. Wish this helps you, all the best.
@Mad lemming 17, wise words, I'm glad I came across what you wrote today!
Lmao how to cut off relatinship with parents
My dad. Complete. And I'm burnt out honestly. Exactly what they said at the begining of the video.
#same and I refuse to have him in my life.period. #doorclosed
I'm equally toxic as my dad.
@Hasu Kim - It's important to set and maintain clear boundaries with toxic people, even a parent. It's good you recognise that he is, and can now identify the signs, so you can avoid relationships with others who display the same signs. Often when we grow up with dysfunctional parents, that becomes our "normal" and, unaware of the potential harm, we tend to repeat it by unconsciously seeking out others who are similar.
Start to identify *your* needs and limits, so you can set boundaries with him, and learn ways to end conversations that are disrespectful, abusive and pushing your limits, while maintaining your dignity.
That way you can heal, regain your personal power and autonomy, and hopefully have a respectful relationship with him. If not, distancing yourself may be your next best option.
@Ayontica Banerjee - It's a startling revelation when you realise that you possess similar traits as a parent who has been harmful towards you. It's a learned behaviour, as it was role-modelled to you by your parent, so it's no surprise that you'd pick up on some of it as well.
Fortunately, recognising that within yourself is the first step to being able to change your thoughts and behaviours so that you're not acting in ways that impact others negatively. You can choose to change how you perceive or judge things, and how to treat people, and yourself, better.
@@ayonticabanerjee8326 it was a similar process for me. I lost all my friends, lost belief in humanity, everything became a game of power and manipulation, but the crippling depression was a wake up call because I could feel my useless ego puffing up for no reason. Hurting others hurts us it's double edged sword. Then I surrendered to depression. I lost it all, no motivation to live or do anything. I could see myself standing on a an edge of a tall building a few months down the line. It was simply unable to imagine any other future for myself.
Just like a flame about to go out burns brighter, I decided to give a last go, and invested myself fully in a play our college was making for a competition. My teacher had a bad impression of me through and through because I was very inconsistent with classes since I had lost all interest in life, it was just so hard to take myself and mover every morning just to see people who either ignored me or looked down on me or just used me and left. But there was a senior, i guess he somehow noticed something during play, and started to talk with me. Just study things, and research paper talk, some time pass talk nothing serious or emotional.
Then one day we decided to meet up for the same, and I guess he deliberately kept changing the topic to other things. We ended up talking for a whole day, and honestly I was kind of alarmed. Because I didn't feel bad, I was comfortable, and somehow my trust in him became unshakable because I soon trusted his logic more than mine. We would discuss everything about the work, he would be able to understand what I wanted to say when I didn't even know what I was saying, but I consistently avoided emotional topics. And one time he ended up getting hurt bad because I trusted another person who was wrong person to trust in that situation. That day, I cried after years. Just because of a single look we passed. I'm such a stupid, I couldn't even bring myself to say sorry.. I just kept waiting around... Somehow just be there. It was like that for two three days or so. I kept being around but I wasn't even able to talk to him again. And he took the initiative again. After that, I apologies multiple times. After that guilt.. I tried to cut him off. Because I was so afraid of hurting someone. Quarantine with the narcissist was taking toll on me too. That fucker is so patient, after a month of no calls from me he suddenly called and kept asking me to speak. Until I cried and blurted somethings out finally.
I put all this just to say, believe. It's okay to hurt, and be depressed, just try and please voice your emotions, so many times people are waiting. I hope this will help somehow. Good luck on your journey👍
Wish i had seen something like this a decade ago 'cause i had the displeasure of dealing with some evil, evil people. I can practically guarantee i'd be a radically different person had i not met them.
Same here.
What’s worse is the health effects of toxic people on sane healthy people.
Girl I talked to for two months made me feel so awful. The hot and cold of her interest. The committing non-commitment. Talking to this guy and that guy. The white lies, not remember things said.
She has pretty poor mental health and depression as well. The family problems, the drama, the dynamics. How can your life have no peace?
They will drag your life into a place that constantly pumps your body with stress hormones, each day, everyday, all day long.
I asked a straight question about us, to which led to a small argument, and she blocked me.
Yeah it felt awful being blocked, by someone you care about, but as all those stress chemicals shut off, my real self emerged again. It was a real blessing. Took a week or two but my body is finally back to normal chemicals again.
Unless she gets therapy and medication, never again. Never.
I think the most important distinction between a toxic person and a flawed person is awareness too. A lot of toxic people will be willfully ignorant to their own toxicity and try to pretend that they aren’t doing anything bad. Most people who exhibit these traits I find are more often than not just unaware that they’re doing it and would likely at least try to work on being better if they were made aware.
That’s why I generally disagree with the “just cut them out of your life” solution. Cutting people out or distancing yourself from them entirely should never be the first step, as that often has much more devastating consequences on the other person than people like to admit. In some cases it can make the person suicidal. It’s always better to first talk with this person clearly about their behavior and let them know how they’re affecting you, then if things remain unchanged start easing them out of your life. Severing ties with people should be a last resort rather than a solution.
Perfect timing....i was crying 3 hours straight today, needed this🥺
Do you want to talk?
❤️❤️❤️
I have met toxic people almost half my life now, even if we try to help them out with their problems and make them value themselves they don't do it for themselves they're far too obsessed thinking their problems are just bigger than everyone and everything. Always with the victim mindset. I've literally just dropped a toxic person, I don't want to be devalued for my looks, personality and feelings, I will not hesitate to call anyone out if they do so.
I have a cousin who is constantly using the lamest excuses to not hang out with me and others such as faking depression, she is always like “Sorry I’m kinda having a mental breakdown every night and I’m also tired so no.” She has also admitted that she was jealous of me a couple of times in the past not to mention she talked badly behind my back TWICE and used the lame excuse, “I just got ahead of myself.” She is always competitive and whenever I achieve something she tells me that she should’ve done it and that she would have done better. Whenever I tell someone about it like my parents they just tell me that I’m overreacting.
Just laugh at her & say ok.
I had friends who acted this Way. I left them. I was guilty for everything what bad happened in their life. I could just sit and breathe and it‘s my fault, that they lost their job for example.
persons like them never deserved me.
Feel the same. Someone who creates their own tried to drag me down to their lower level... So I learned a new take on a saying That Misery NEEDS Company. And I am not going to stoop that low to keep them company.
I.Dont.Matter yes, I have a black cat.
i am a toxic people
@@weirdlyghostly1814 I am more toxic look fuck you scumbag born in the especific ocean jajjajajajajahaja
Well said.
It’s a bit more difficult to cut those people off, especially when it is Family
As an extreme introvert, I don’t usually say this out loud, but I’m glad I don’t have friends. I’m toxic enough to my own self, I don’t need to drag others down with me 😅.
um omg hi?
Want to cuddled out the blues??
Trish Hamilton Same here.
You're not toxic at all. You bend over backwards so as not to want to hurt anyone in any way, intentionality or unintentionally
@Trish Hamilton Sounds like labeling yourself as “toxic” actually may not be accurate at all. Why do that to yourself? Sounds like there may be other things going on related to you being an extreme introvert.
Definitely experienced a lot of this, I felt the brunt of it often so I walked away
They had the nerve to tell me if I walk away there’s no returning and I calmly responded I wouldn’t
They had a way of keeping me in their web of chaos by gaslighting and guilt tripping me
Wow! I just ended a 20 year friendship with someone that this describes perfectly. I have to say, I feel much better now. Thank you!
Please talk more about why guys lie over small things in a relationship
Yeah that's actually a good idea..-
Oh i seen that lol
Because girls get made for the littlest things
Most of the time
Lol that's not just exclusive to a particular gender
This screams my EX. As much as I tried to work is out & I believed him when he will change. No...it didn’t happen. I was losing my mind. I never experienced so much stress that caused my anxiety attacks from that relationship. I loved him but I love me more. Praying for him to notice that he needs to change or he’ll end up alone.
People don't change. They just stop doing what they used to do for a while. Given the right triggers they will do it again. We see that issue clearly in addicts but it's in all of us. Given the right motivator we can pause the negative behaviour but when we are no longer motivated we do what comes natural to us.
Congrats on taking care of yourself First.
its even sadder when you grow up in a toxic household with toxic friendships and relationships and end up becoming the toxic person yourself
Yup my mom does many of these things. It’s so terrible! Especially the last one!
I have fallen in love with the young lady's voice. So charming, sweet and soothing. Thank you.
I’m not in a relationship with a guy but me and my mother got the most toxics relationship, and everything she said in this video I related to everything
EVERYTHING YOU SAY REPRESENTS THE WORST “FRIEND” I HAVE EVER HAD. DO YOU KNOW MY LIFE!? Wow, this channel is really good...
Seems like i have a lot of toxic friends 😶
Edit: we could all be friends :D
Same
me, too
I used to and as soon as I cut ties, my list of friends went down (:
Remember, toxicity attracts toxicity...
So think of yourselves first
Let's all be friends
Well that answers my question. I did indeed have toxic friends and I was also beginning to act a like them, and i noticed and did not like it. I have been distancing myself for around a year and I have never felt better. My mental is better and I feel very free
#7 They turn people against each other and then play both sides because *a)* they want to appear as the upright objective peacekeeper ("the good guy") and *b)* Gives them more control, and emotional leverage in situations
Me realising that I was toxic in Primary school through Yr 7. Thank goodness that I’ve changed for the better. I’m actually so proud that I can re asses my past actions😃
I wish people would've told me about those things earlier as everyone call you toxic but they never care to explain on why. I must thank that one person who was kind enough to send me this video.
Nice video :) This really helped me out.
1 month-
@@slimeyli ya me too
The video was made 34 seconds ago IT SAYS YOUR COMMENT WAS MADE A MONTH AGO. TH-cam’s drunk again.. :
WHAT THE??? 1 MONTH AGO?!!!
This video was unlisted a month ago that's why.
Yeah, that’s a lot of my ex friends…
Thanks for this video, now I can try to avoid people like this going forward!!!
Scary to the point… I’m beyond drained. There was only one incident in my life 10 years ago I felt as drained and exhausted like this. Thanks for that topic.
i have recently ended a friendship after my friend did most of the thing you just described. In the end, she is still placing the blame on me and shamed me for hurting her feelings. I was actually having doubts about this friendship for a while now, my only regret is that I didn't end this friendship sooner. for as long as it lasted, it was a good friendship. There were signs at the early stage that suggested she is incredibly selfish. I wish i believed in those signs then.
I'm so angry that I just perceive that a "friend" that i had was so freaking toxic, and at a time she just left me and i felt that it was my fault. Now I understand that she just wanted to use me for her's problems and, when I wasn't useful, she abandoned me. 🙄😡
Two years ago I realized my so called best friend was toxic and was meddling in my relationship with my partner even going as far as to tell us lies about each other and gaslighting me. The past years have not been easy but I'm thankful both of us cut this mess of a person out of our lives.
My “friend” I see is playing the victim card. Again and again people “wrong her” or mistreat and “say bad things” about her, cheat her, lie to her or “abuse” her two pet animals (such as in grooming them or medically treating them).
I needed to hear this now. 6 months ago I lost my best friend, and I still feel like it was all my fault. And I still miss her😔
Same. I lost my bestfriend. All along I am blaming myself for the things that happened. I got low self esteem. But I realize, no. It wasn't my fault. I know I just did the right thing. To save myself and my ex-bestfriend. In the end, I still cared not just for myself but also for that person.
I've never forgotten a couple of lines of script in a frame on a wall in the despatch office of a foodservice distributor when I happened to call there more than 20 years ago: 'Some bring pleasure to a room full of people when they enter; others when they leave.' Everyone should ask themselves which category they fit into.
I’ve been around enough toxic people to know when someone is toxic, and sadly I know people in these types of relationships.
PS: Please whoever reading this, read it till the end and kindly learn from my experience.. if you see any of these signs in someone just do yourself a favour by limiting your relationship with them..
I had a toxic friend in my life.. which I got rid of a few months back... We've been friends for almost 3 years and I can't overcome the fact that what I have done to myself just for her, I totally lost myself by compromising for her, being submissive, being controlled and overall only caring for her. In these years, I didn't even cared for my health, my happiness because I was so busy caring for her .. And all of these signs are so accurate.. she had all of them.. Ah! I just can't forget it.. it's still painful to think about those past 3 years. I have lost so much time and energy. I have compromised so much on my health and happiness.
Good move. Life goes on and lessons learned.
@@ratagris21 sure
My mother in law who passed away three weeks ago today was a very toxic towards me and my husband. She was bipolar and had dementia until her death. She was mentally abusive , a control freak, she threatened us constantly Guilt trips. She tried everything In Her power to break up our marriage, I now know how toxic she was. We lived with this for 29 years. I can say that I hope she rests it peace.this informed of the to ic warning signs. Thank you.
Their Evil and selfish.
Imagine if that was the whole video 😂
@@Ann4b3l Kicking toxic people out is kind of cruel. Imagine having no friends, just because your more different then the status quo. people constantly say i don't know what you're talking but, but they arn't really listening, even if they say they do, and they don't reply to it at all. autistics constantly have this problem. nobody really listens but they say they do, but they never speak back too you. you don't have to be constantly on edge all the time. people tend to overreact and take you literally which is dumb. how do you see from both sides if they don't, tell you there side. humans are weird.
*they're
@@free_money1945 whatever.
"The world isn't fair! if you act like a prey they will eat you whole, so you must be strong and tough. show them how to fight!
I have a number of people like this in my life.sadly, for my health and sanity, they will be gone from my life forever.
my friend constantly gets mad when I don't ask them to hang out but they never want to go anywhere except for their house. I'm often really busy because I'm trying to work on myself or get homework done. I'm always scared to say no to hanging out because they'll start a whole arguement and make me feel terrible.
You got to stand up to them. Tell them you have a life outside theirs and your wants and needs are just as important as theirs. Tell them you know their trying to guilt trip you. Its ok to say no. I'd even advise cutting them from your life completely. If they do this regularly, no good can come from it. Trust me. If they play the victim and say their "going through something" don't fall for it. (unless they actually r and its serious). Wish you the best dude