this link I can open but the link for the 3 meditations for free says Oops something went wrong. I will look it up a different way and Im going to look on Instagram
Changed my whole day ☺️ was sending energetic resistance to *him* since i woke up. So far 9 days no contact. I wanted a committed relationship, he didn’t want the same thing. I couldn’t force him to want the same thing so I said goodbye and so did he. He was 1000% a soulmate, but I know Im worthy of a committed relationship with someone im extremely attracted too on a spiritual and physical level at the same time 🥰 I know what I want and I wont settle for less. Wish everyone the best xo
For me, they have to be ascended. This month is so fast with so many twists. Many will ascend n their ideas of what they n u want may change n then reverse. Some are much slower than others, too. 😉🤗💕 xxx
@Dylan G exactly what im doing. His cut off is today to explain himself n actions towards me ..n why hes coming to me whilst still with the 3rd party. Im gunna tell him just after MN tonight that im doing me.. whatever comes along i will take a look at. Taking it slow as iv lots on atm. Thank u for ur advice deal1 🤗💕 xxx
You deserve absolutely the best, Valeria Sofia. You're a a sparkle of God. If he can't respond to your feelings the way you deserve and want, you can only love him for whom he is and move on. There's thousands of soul mates-to-be in this vast world. I know the right person is coming.
Same to you. I'm glad you know your worth & you let him go by pushing him away. We all deserve better! Glad your in a better plsce! Wishing you all the best!!
No contact no reaction no snooping on social media no drive bys best thing I ever learned in therapy 🙏🏻 actually saved my life from a toxic marriage 🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻
When they reach out again after 40 days, it means, there was noone better than you to be found! You should say them "have a nice life" and delete the number. Because if they went nk contact with you for 40 dats it means, you are NOT IMPORTANT. THEY WILL DO IT AGAIN SOON.
@@jesenikmIt's like a cycle that repeats itself. Personally what I'd do is give dry responses after 40 days if they decide to contact me again. To protect myself I stopped projecting energy at them and detached emotionally.
Might be weird cause i ve never thought i would comeback here to comment but here i AM: Well, after 10 months of no contact with my bf (cause i ve never seen him as an ex even we broke up and we went thourh no contact situation) but i was aulways feeling and believe that this aint over even if EVERYONE in my life were saying yeah u r fuking dreaming you r getting old you should settle down, time is going fast .. I choosed to stay faithful to him never dated any guy and boom out of no where in a random friday day he traveled from his contry to mine to ask me for reconciliation with a heart crying and really loving, after 6 month then we got engaged , life is beautiful and most of all god is real , i pray for all of you to get wht you want and feel the fulfulliment you're looking for, keep in mind, ANAYTHING IS POSSIBLE and dont believe anyone saying to you it's not , lovee❤
No contact isn't to "get the other person back," no contact is for YOU. If you do no contact correctly, you get the time and perspective to see that relationship for what it was and realize someone better is on their way. It's easy to think, when you're wrapped up in someone, that just because they're the best you've had so far it means they're the best you'll ever get. Most of the time, if you really committed to no contact and invested all that energy back into yourself, by the time your ex shows back up you've taken reconciliation off the table.
Revolution 2020, how true! No contact, means forever! Leave with dignity and self respect. No reconciliation! If they come back sooner or later they’ll leave just the same. 8 billion people iin the planet, the “one” is out there for you!!! Blessings
Dumb isn't it!? Out of that maybe a handful of possible options for a variety of reasons. So narrow-minded advice. I've traveled the World for many years, lived many different Countries, had been on over thirty different dating apps and sites and still didn't encountered a fraction of a percentage they are talking about lol Not to mention quality of those options!
Exactly 👌💯 Detach move on. We meet people in life for a reason. Never regret relationships it was what we wanted at that time. Good Memories and sometimes lessons . Self love always ❤✌️🌎
My ex really hurt me. I thought everything was good and I felt secure. She out of nowhere broke up with me right after I moved 200 miles to be close to her after driving there every weeekend for about 5 months, through snow storms, covid lockdown restrictions, I was crushed. She always kept in contact though, I finally got her to admit she liked this other guy more but he was married and he left his wife to be with her. Well, her always contacting me and checking on me always kept me in a broken hearted state. I finally blocked her on everything and I started feeling 100 times better. When I'd talk to her I would get so happy and feel on top of the world, then I'd feel so depressed and sad. Forget about your ex, she's stealing your energy.
I was fool enough to contact an ex. She was in an already crappy relationship, and we slept a couple times. The guy broke up with her, she went depressed BUT kept contact with him in some sports teams almost daily. Nevertheless she was texting me all day long, called me a couple times a day (at least), but I was clear in my non-platonic intentions. She went from reluctantly accepting to outright rejecting me, so I quit. She went MAD about it. I now can feel the energy she was sucking out of me. Don’t make my same mistake, guys.
I feel this. Just had the same happen; we were talking about me moving there and she expressed she was all in. Then did an about face about 10 days later and completely curb stomped me. This message is what I needed today, I've been expending too much of my energy trying to stay in contact and I just need to go no contact and focus on myself. It's been draining me.
I love this and what Aaron says about “stop abandoning yourself.” I think he is describing the ideal state for no contact, but I also think it’s okay to just practice the behavior of no contact even if you can’t get a person out of your head. Fake it til you make it. If you have an anxious attachment style, it will be very hard to stop focusing thoughts on a person, but Aaron’s advice of stopping the social media stalking and all forms of contact will be a great place to start. Eventually you will get there energetically too.
Betsy Truberg, no contact means to let go for ever. Leave graciously and with dignity. Where there’s mutual love there’s grace and peace. Love is not stressful at all. No begging, no bread crumbs… you deserve better. Blessings
I think he ìs out to lunch no psychology degree... psychotic amnesia some answers of their life some serious counseling whether they are even capable of being in one...again ? did you actually surgically break up or just walk out of each other's lives? Energy man .. energy... space and your own energy.. feeling energy mandatory you don't want them in your life, they know that, but they ended up being your best friend anyway they can't even tell about your energy man... this person choosed me and is trying to be non criminal about it.
I love how you supported having a conversation before you go no contact and displaying vulnerability. Often times going no contact may seem like ghosting someone,but what sets them apart is having just that one conversation before you decide to step away.
I wanted to have a last conversation, but he didn’t give me the chance so I sent a goodbye message saying that I understand and I will honor his decision and wish him the best. I started my no contact after that. No drama.
My partner lied to be for months, looked into my eyes and lied..over and over again. Made me question my sanity. Made up stories. Swore on his kids life. I went no contact. He didn't deserve any kind of message from me.
No I’m going no contact because I’m done! I was giving love, compassion and wanted to be there for this man. I was faithful, I shared everything I had. I was a woman. I was there when he was drunk. I was there when he felt like alone. I was there when he needed encouragement. Im done! He lost a friend as well. Im not chasing him no more. I never want to see him ever again in life. I forgive him. Just don’t want to ever see him again. He loved to see me hurting.
I can so relate ! I was there for my man too through all the drunken nights all the hours on the phone supporting him just hurting myself over and over. Then when I try to move on, he comes back. 💔😢 I broke up with him and four days later he was at my door. Not to make up and say I’m sorry but just for sex and not doing the boyfriend girlfriend thing anymore 😢💔 hurts so bad I’m in NO CONTACT MODE now I hope he stays away
No contact helps you in so many different levels. It’s helped me loving myself and knowing my self worth. I have been in no contact for 3 months now and I still have my days not gonna lie but at the end of the day I got me ❤
I can relate to all of this. I know for a fact that I have an anxious attachment style and the person that interests me often takes over my mind completely. I am going no-contact, but I still occasionally have dreams with this person where I'm attempting to seek their validation. It's hard to fall asleep in the first place because of the conversations I keep imagining. It sucks.
Yeah this advice doesn't work for us, it's OK to try to look after yourself and try new hobbies but your in your own head for 24nhours a day no way to escape
~. It's crazy how many screwed over people there are. I too have a complicated AF situation and doing the work of self improvement an no contact for the sake of my mental health. Thank you for your assistance and guidance through out this mission my guy. 🙏🏻🙌🏼 Hope everyone here finds the strength within to get through whatever it is your struggling with. Im taking it as a "new start, clean slate" mentality so hope that helps. Have a great day and remember... No contact isn't to get a significant other back but to get YOU back. 💥 One day at a time. 👊🏼😏
Mario R , no contact for me was to cut off forever, no matter the pain. Our dignity and self respect comes first . They will value you more then, and search for you, but yet again, now it’s “too late”….made of my mind and letting go was recovering my own self, lots of energy and new things, new friends and a great husband!!! It hurts and takes time but you eventually recover, thanks God! Blessings
Yes I highly believe in no contact too. One of my ex bfs send me a letter recently. I didn’t read the letter I didn’t want to know how he was doing I threw it right into the trash. Of course a part of me found it really tempting but I didn’t want to exchange any of my energy with his and give the universe wrong signs. I don’t want any contact. I think that is the best thing to do in a lot of situations.
Its great to focus on yourself but ive found that it has to come naturally and doesnt until you reach that point from within. You can try to force yourself to forget them all day long but it wont happen until the moment when it naturally happens inside.
This popped up in my feed and I really needed to hear it. I didn’t realize I was abandoning myself in reaching for connection and proving my worth. I got closure yesterday by saying “I am not continuing this connection. Your actions do not match your words and I’m sick of being ghosted constantly. Good luck.” It’s hard not to check socials and you grieve memories with the person as well but it does get better. 💕 I’m going to block socials to keep from checking and I’m combining EFT on limiting beliefs of worthiness and not being enough as well as abandonment issues. Thank you for your content!
I would like to add one small bit for those who have divorced but still co-parent, you can have no contact on everything he just said BUT, when you do need to communicate for the children's sake, keep it 100% like a business conversation. Texts are short and direct and usually involve scheduling of schooling, doctor appointments, and anything related to the well-being of the kiddos.
this is the most helpful no contact video I’ve ever watched. I nodded the whole time, you said everything that needed to be said. Thank you Aaron for reminding us that the only thing that matters when it comes to no contact, is ourselves.
Smashed this Aaron. 100% agree, totally works, focusing on you and your energies, forgetting them, and out the blue, they are trying to get back into your life with a random text.
There is a time that what you think the other person makes you feel it is in you and in reality you are the creator of that energy not the other person...💯💯💯💯
So true. I used to miss her so much and the fun and excitement I thought she brought into my life. But then I looked back and thought deeply remembering clearly that I was the one who put that fun and excitement into our interactions.
What a good message. Self-abandon is the core issue, indeed. It takes courage and work to accept oneself and grow. So worth it in the end. Thank you, Aaron.
My boyfriend broke up with me three weeks ago, I reached out a couple of times, but he never responded. So I went no contact, and I am working on self care now.
When I'm present and I feel it when someone thinks about me, sometimes their image pops in my mind so I see a lot of truth in this information in this video. Sometimes a client I haven't seen for even a year or more just pops in my head and I know virtually 100% of the time they will reach out within days to book and appointment. Out thoughts really are that powerful. Aloha
Very interesting to read. I also think about a person very often and then suddenly the person appears in the physis. Do u think, when you think about a person, the other Person also thinks about you? I try to figure out if we do telepathy or does it comes from a place of wanting the person around me…
This happens to me all the time!! It freaked me out so I decided to do an experiment. I started thinking very hard about my sister. I was thinking for her to message me. A few hours later she did. We would talk every couple of weeks. This is for sure real. You are on the same frequency.
I do "No contact" because I'm elevating to a 5d reality. Their energy holds me back and I'm ok with old relationships wanting to stay in a 3d reality. 😎
Thank you Aaron for sharing your priceless wisdom! It has been a real rough time going no contact with someone I hung out with everyday the past year and made so many new memories/experiences I’ve wanted all my life with to nothing at all and this person texting me “be gone” as a ways of breaking up with me and telling me they don’t want me in their life anymore as an anxiously attached person..one of the most heartbroken I felt in my 22 years of life so far. I’ve been learning a lot about myself and my fault in the approach I have to intimate relationships I share and how much I lose myself & my dreams for others. Not anymore, I will be there for myself before I am others from now on till I am back on solid ground in my own presence. I will increase my self worth and respect one day at a time 💪🏼 stay strong everyone, life isn’t for weak souls that’s why you exist!
Very worldly but informational…things take time, don’t destroy your morals & values & be true to Christ & the good that is inside of you when the devil tries to tear you apart! This is why it’s important to know Gods word as well as the woman you choose to intertwine your soul with as we are connected in our mind, body, & souls. Choose the hard right & do good because simply it is good to be good! Forgive one another & stop holding onto the past to live present in the future or the devil will keep dragging you back down reminding you to keep you at a current state. Stop blaming your trauma & take accountability for your actions…do unto others as you would have done unto yourself!
6 years in a relationship and we both just left each other mutual separation. It’s been about 60 days and I can say I’m completely have moved forward and don’t even think of my ex at all. Yesterday I got a call from her during the day and at night but I didn’t answer. Just feel if I answer than I’m going backwards again when I’m so motivated to move forward and start my life fresh and new. Thankful I don’t know how but everyday that goes by I feel stronger and better with myself and I’m even getting to the point of meeting somebody soon. So if anybody is feeling down no contact is the best way to go and not to get your ex back but for you to move forward with your life. Remember they are your ex for a reason always keep that in mind. Good luck everybody!
Or you never truly loved each other, especially if it took you 8 weeks to move on, get used to it you'll not likely be in a life long relationship with this mindset
Thank you so much this. It resonated with me 100%. I now know what I am going to do. I could never understand why I kept making the same wrong decision again and again. I did meditation and the voice spoke to me telling me how I was abandoned at the age of 11. I had buried this 44 year's ago. It was a EurekAlert moment. This person is still very much in my life but I now have to let him go. I thank him for being my teacher. Lesson learnt. I now must start to unpack the abandonment from my childhood. Figured out why I kept going in the same circles over and over and over. Thank you ❤❤❤
I would love to see a video of you talking about the energy of “stringing people along” or “bread crumbing” and the energy and childhood dynamic going between both parties in that situation.
That also still comes down to one having an anxious attachment style (the one who lets themselves get breadcrumbed) and the avoidant attachment style (the one who does the breadcrumbing)
Nah. Not pulling back with no contact because I want outcome with being with him. I just don't NEED to be in this relationship. I don't chase, never did, never will. I'm comfortable and confidant within. If he comes back, I'll see what I'll decide to do. It's all good.
Aaron you have changed my life. Thank you. I would be so much more of a mess without your videos and advice. Ive been no contact for a little over a week because I am no longer abandoning myself. Thank you!!
This is exactly what I teach my clients in a domestic violence program. So glad to hear someone speak the same language on the same topic. Great video!
This is so true I try explain this to my friends but they just don't get it they think if they do this the person us going to leave instead it makes the relationship stronger or repairs the relationships! Distance makes the heart grow stronger!
I just got out of a 4 1/2 year relationship and we were engaged to get married. 1 month before our wedding, she walked out of my life. I’m 36 years old, I felt like she was the one. I spent the last 4 years investing into her school and career , our relationship and it’s abrupt end has been really tough. I’m starting to see though that we probably both had some sort of abandonment issues…. She kept wanting to come back , just to have sex with me, and I emotionally couldn’t handle it bc I’m in love with her and that’s not what I want. I’ve went full no contact to work on myself, but it’s still a brutal reality to face.
@mattcanflyhigh, yes, that was very inconsiderate of your g/f to leave you just like that. For whatever reasons, she left, the pain, hurt and disappointment are really brutal, so cold!!! Only God can help you overcome this mortal blow! Turn to Jesus, and ask for His guidance and love. Go to a full gospel church where you can find support and counseling, healthy friends too. Nowadays people have no problem hurting other people’s feelings, no shame, no heart! No wonder society is so rotten, drugs, crime etc. No feelings, so much materialism!!! Incredible !!! Stay strong and don’t go back to her for nothing. You deserve better. Plenty of fish in the ocean… Blessings
thank you very much this was my medicine for today!! going through this atm. first I initially broke up because it was toxic, then she dragged me back in because she was being needy but she was guilt tripping me... then I fell for it and then she turned around and dumped me after she felt better about the break up lol obviously more to it on a personal level.. but we got this people.. know ur self worth, move away from those toxic people.. remember we are good people and want the best.
To anyone reading this, there will be ups and downs. I’m going through this right now, lack of sleep is the worst!! 8 year relationship, ended in 45 seconds via FaceTime. No conversation, or courtesy or feelings towards the length of our time together. Not one word! I’m now 24 days NC from the very end of that phone call. I’m trying to tell myself that I’m in a good place, although I’m struggling a lot. I’m finding it difficult to pull my energy back. Watching a lot of these videos, meditation, self concept meditation and learning about attachment styles. Just as a side I’m a middle aged guy, I go gym 5 days/week, good job and life. But I do still miss my relationship, as we did have many good memories. You, yes, you! Stay strong, the universe has got your back. ✌️
Same thing happened to me, cut off like I never existed, Its been 6 weeks and still spend everyday thinking about her. I contacted her once 2 weeks ago and it didn't go well it just resurfaced all the pain. I hope your life has got easier and don't fold like i did. We deserve better 🙏
Excellent job! You're on the right path. Keep it up. A little bit of time and you'll be better than you've ever been! You'll be grateful for the pain you went through!
34 days NC I’m staying strong, the book ‘Attached’ was a real eye opener for me as was Corey Wayne’s, 3% man. Both have helped completely change how I view and interact in relationships. I’ll use those as fuel as I cont on this journey. It’s not all good though. Sleep or lack thereof is really bad. Just can’t seem to stay asleep. I know it’ll get better I just hope it’s soon. Stay strong 💪🏻
@@ProdBySinister Hey mate, I couldn't do it, I wasn't strong enough. I lasted 2 weeks and had to reach out. She was happy to hear from me. Then we got stuck in the friends zone. I know she was chatting to others and wanted her options open. We went back and forth for many weeks. But the videos are correct in they need to see you in a different light and feel they can lose you. It was only till I said I can't do this any more I need to cut you out of my life all together she seemed to notice and make an effort. We are now back together and I'm learning not to be so needy and give her space. So far it's working.
That’s great to hear! I’m glad you were able to recover your relationship. I’m facing the same issue right now and it’s tough…. I feel like my ex is confused.. we been together for 3 years.. and she completely just started ignoring me out of the blue… I became really needy at that point. Trying everything to show her that I am promoting and accepting change in our lives. But she would continue to not talk to me.. I feel our relationship has been one sided.. but it’s just really hard to come to terms.. and accept.. I view my self with more value now that I have been these last few days.. but at the same time I miss her terribly..
@@michaelg4044 mate that's really hard. Especially when the communication is only one sided and only one person is making all the effort. The advantage I had that even when we were broken up and she couldn't see a future there was communication so I decided to play and take a chance on the friend thing. It finally worked out. But it was also hit and miss.
It's time to be me , because I love myself more ❤ but the mind goes for the anxious attachment road ....it's also mainly , maybe due to past experiences ...but happy that yesterday gave the day to myself I spent , the dusk reading a book by the sea 🙏, no phone before bed , just me and God , being present in the moment
Rather than just saying “focus on yourself rather than waiting for his text” this is way more effective and understandable advice. I tried protest manipulation but like you said couldn’t hide needy energy when I meet him again because of all the emotional rollercoaster I was on while on the protest period. This video and few other of yours totally changed my perspective and I already feel better about myself and about letting go. Thank you.
I’ve recently collected part of my inner child from the 3 month old version of me . I feel so much more complete now ❤️ I was definitely an anxious attachment
@@christielee1840 asking myself why I get extremely attached and why I makes me feel very anxious when I loose that attachment, accepting that there was an issue with me that kept repeating the same cycle of attracting avoidant attachments , I know there’s nothing wrong with me yet I continue to connect with men that I feel I have to prove my worth them and I actually don’t at all , yet my body still filled with anxiety regardless has to how I saw myself. When we are young and we loose a connection with one of our parents or both , we start to tune into the environment to find some kind of connection… I became aware that I’ve always gone to my mum for acceptance and validation. So I asked my mum who’s very emotionally unstable when she had her first breakdown , it was when I was 3 months old Since I became aware of this I’m not the little broken girl anymore my inner child feels complete I’ve been on a journey of self discovery for around 5 years now and there was always a part of me that I felt I was lacking . Since then I’ve actually been able to stand up to my mum and not just please her for acceptance or validation. Awareness is the key , go right back through your adult years and teenage until you was first born Ask your family and friends how it was when you was a baby or child growing up For many years I had the idea that my upbringing was perfect, a false imagine that my mind designed which left me believing that’s there’s something wrong with me ❤️❤️❤️
@@christielee1840 u have to do the shadow work..theres many vids to describe this n give u help. Its usually around ur parents n early lifes' lessons that brought on beliefs tjat dont serve us. They are usually attatched to what society expects n what we conformed to. These days we dont need to live this way any more. It served the masses for 100s of yrs but only coz the family made us conform. We have to re learn the truth n not the illusions we've conformed to. Hope this helps too 🤗💕 xxx
@@intenselyrich3517uk yes I’ve also been doing the shadow work too ❤️ I’m a former substance addict too, you know for 7 years I never owned a mirror , I couldn’t even look at my own reflection ok a window so I had curtains up . I absolutely used to hate myself Christie. Then I turned it all around and I also look at myself in the mirror and talk to myself and tell myself that I am worthy , I am loved , ❤️
I personally don't like the no contact scenario for me, because it = the silent treatment= crazy making rollercoaster ride of resentment. I truly understand the energy dynamics. Sometimes you have to walk away and it's soul crushing especially when it involves family. I just lower my expectations and send that person healing energy. Great video!
That’s because you actually have to block their access to you and not just keep ignoring texts-I don’t know why he didn’t say this, but you actually block the person so you can’t get those crazy texts or calls from them breeding resentment. Just block them for awhile after explaining why. You can always unblock them later.
Mulhouse, no contact to me means walking away forever, no matter the pain!!! If you get them back they’ll still break away from you later on. Leave the relationship with dignity and self respect. Plenty of fish in the ocean. Blessings
I Never know, all my chasing, all my choices, all my relationships all based on childhood trauma, and scapegoat of narcissists family members... most sadness things, Nobody worthy of my chase, It's childhood wounds, deepest wounds...
Why would you want someone, who dumped you, back in your life? I feel like, once that person ends relationship with you, you need to just move on with your life. Unless you did something bad and made them leave you, they don't deserve 2nd chance. If the reason they left you is because you cared too much, then f'em.
Hey man. Your my hero. I did that a few times in my life. And this last time works faster, even with a really special person to me. I tried to be friend but was so bad for me that I decided to do my way. I have a lot of respect for your knowledge.
i love you man , you helped me out. im anxious , i have been there here in that position and im better than before trying atleast. its hard but going better. im glad for the opportunity i got in the first place too.
Aaron, thank you for this video. I finally understood what you meant and you explained so well that I think I can finally turn my no contact into something meaningful.
Both reasons, I'm doing it for me because I want respect and I can only get that by respecting myself but if it helps this person to realise how much they appreciate what I bring to the table then I would like that too. We were so close and now I don't understand why she is pulling away she told me we are soul mates.
Woman aren't as nice as they let on, men grow more attached usually and build a life around this person but women will walk when it suits them as they have more options, men have to chase women it's be taught so as soon as there's a breakup women have options men have to work for options
Just what I needed and just in time (only 2 days have past of being dumped). Something clicked in me and I feel my power back. Thanks man. I’m in debt.
Thank you Aaron, this is really something that I was thinking of doing, you put a name/label/deeper explanation in it. It is actually virtuous--while thinking of no contact taking care of yourself in the process, removing yourself from an already hurtful situation. but also somewhat wishing the other person to be well. I'm now trying to CHOOSE ME over anybody else (in a nurturing way---a not so easy task being a people pleaser and an empath not just with my romantic relationship), and having a glimpse of little success day by day giving a balm to my wounded soul.... I hope other people having such experiences will also benefit from it. GOD bless you!
No contact is all about you!!! Not manipulating other people, cut that person out of your life for good!!! Let go of it , focus on you, turn that negative sad energy inward and use it to motivate you to improve yourself!!!! There other woman out there, better woman that won’t play games with you ….. focus on you, everything else will fall into place…. Don’t ever let someone use you !!!!
@@Caolan-b6r I didn’t fuck up !!! She’s 22 I’m 54!!! There’s no future in that and I wouldn’t ever date anyone her age no matter how smokin hot she is!!! Ever!!! I made the right choice in ghosting her and blocking her number…. She needs to play with guys more her own age!!!!
Wow you just opened my eyes to something i was doing.... anxious attachment and pulling away so they can look for me in manipulation..... damn hit hard. Thank you..... ❤️
In case anyone is wondering, ghosting is not the answer. I found out the hard way that you need to phone block the person otherwise they will reach out by a few days and break the no contact rule by getting upset why you are not responding now. Do not just ignore a person, block them so it really gives you both space. You can always unblock them. But I was stuck in a very strong dynamic where if I did start to create boundaries and do no contact, he would ask where I was or what’s up. So if anyone is wondering, you do need to actually block their access to you as well in order for this to really work. Especially if they are hot & cold with you, or you are an option for their future when ready, trust me, if you just ignore them or “ghost” it could get ugly rather than giving respectful space. Also like Aaron said, let them know you are blocking them too with giving yourself and them closure so it’s not a surprise when they try to text or call.
No contact is bullshit. It means it is game over. If someone wants to have a relationship of any kind, contact is needed!. Without contact, effort and willingness, there is no relationship.
Agree completely but lord this life has been hard. My standards are on the floor because I was badly abused by my family so that's all I've felt like I deserved in life. I have CPTSD and it's hard enough to regulate myself on a daily basis, let alone try to make a living. I'll stay single for the rest of my life if that protects me because my precious heart and soul deserves to be treated well, loved and cherished.
Today I came across your channel 👍👍 the more I watch a video about manifestion the more i started dislike my ex I started hating me I don't care if he has no contact let him go back I don't lose him he lose me
Sometimes you have to make a choice, between life and health, it’s sad to be pushed that far, Went from being his destiny to hell shapeshifter 3 months now, still thinking trauma, but also healing, focusing on myself, can’t keep giving carrying others responsibilities😢😭they are shapeshifters everything you want then the mask comes off🥵 Thank you this helps, keep my eyes on improving healing myself😢🥵🙏 It’s not hard being loving giving helpful kind No closure with a lying abuser manipulative thief😢silence is golden, trauma hurts😢😭
In MBTI introverted thinking (Ti) and extroverted feeling (Fe) work on an axis. So Ti automatically produces Fe. And Fe produces Ti. So Aaron is correct that thinking about someone is coupled with releasing energy to them. Interestingly Aaron is an ENFP who prefers introverted feeling (Fi) which is coupled with extroverted thinking (Te) which executes external actions. So the best thing he could do is use Fi by bringing back his energy to him which gives more power to him to execute external changes in his life. Which he does.
I know you took a pause from making these relationship advice videos. But I'm really thankful for this, I have been watching youtube videos/ for advice ALL day long. And your words/ and delivery really helped and made the difference. Thank you and God Bless you, Aaron.
My gf started to be behave colder, saying to me " I don't have time for you" and so on, so I decided to not contact her for 1 week, and I decided it tonight. I want see her reaction, how long she will resist without me :| I love her a lot, we have 1 year and 6 months together, non stop contact, but I think is time to do a pause, to be recharged, but she changed after started work
They don’t care anymore. Even if you go no contact, and they are doing the deed with someone else or multiple people, all they will feel is pity towards you because “their hearts have changed it’s mind on how they feel about you”. If you have ever had a change of heart on someone else, and they come back to you, and you felt nothing no more for them at that time, all you would do is feel pity and sorry for them that they still have feelings for you and you don’t. It’s like, you feel sorry that one time you had feelings for them and led them to that point but now, it’s gone, and you feel bad and ashamed to have liked them at one point. It also feels like a nuisance if they come back asking you to be with them again, but you don’t want to be with them anymore because there are no more feelings left in you for them. It’s a sucky feeling all the way around. No one wins in the end.
Finding it so hard to be vulnerable. Just want to clear my head but can't bring myself up to this difficult task so staying in no contact with patience and in silence.
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Yes
this link I can open but the link for the 3 meditations for free says Oops something went wrong. I will look it up a different way and Im going to look on Instagram
@@tessdean2523 it does the same thing for me through every browser.
O Do you even know about Do even more even Hanson on
Iam very like ho. You will never very much tanks in all
Changed my whole day ☺️ was sending energetic resistance to *him* since i woke up. So far 9 days no contact. I wanted a committed relationship, he didn’t want the same thing. I couldn’t force him to want the same thing so I said goodbye and so did he. He was 1000% a soulmate, but I know Im worthy of a committed relationship with someone im extremely attracted too on a spiritual and physical level at the same time 🥰 I know what I want and I wont settle for less. Wish everyone the best xo
For me, they have to be ascended. This month is so fast with so many twists. Many will ascend n their ideas of what they n u want may change n then reverse. Some are much slower than others, too. 😉🤗💕 xxx
@Dylan G exactly what im doing. His cut off is today to explain himself n actions towards me ..n why hes coming to me whilst still with the 3rd party. Im gunna tell him just after MN tonight that im doing me.. whatever comes along i will take a look at. Taking it slow as iv lots on atm.
Thank u for ur advice deal1 🤗💕 xxx
You deserve absolutely the best, Valeria Sofia. You're a a sparkle of God. If he can't respond to your feelings the way you deserve and want, you can only love him for whom he is and move on. There's thousands of soul mates-to-be in this vast world. I know the right person is coming.
Same to you. I'm glad you know your worth & you let him go by pushing him away. We all deserve better! Glad your in a better plsce! Wishing you all the best!!
Sofia,can I get ur comtact
“You’re not doing no contact to get them back” love that.
No contact no reaction no snooping on social media no drive bys best thing I ever learned in therapy 🙏🏻 actually saved my life from a toxic marriage 🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻
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Sesizenza
This is why when you go no contact and 40 days in you all of a sudden realize you aren't thinking of them much anymore and POOF they call u.
Happens every time 🤣🤣🤣
When they reach out again after 40 days, it means, there was noone better than you to be found! You should say them "have a nice life" and delete the number. Because if they went nk contact with you for 40 dats it means, you are NOT IMPORTANT. THEY WILL DO IT AGAIN SOON.
1 week in. Mine just texted me drunk and then deleted it before I could see it
@@jesenikmIt's like a cycle that repeats itself. Personally what I'd do is give dry responses after 40 days if they decide to contact me again. To protect myself I stopped projecting energy at them and detached emotionally.
Might be weird cause i ve never thought i would comeback here to comment but here i AM: Well, after 10 months of no contact with my bf (cause i ve never seen him as an ex even we broke up and we went thourh no contact situation) but i was aulways feeling and believe that this aint over even if EVERYONE in my life were saying yeah u r fuking dreaming you r getting old you should settle down, time is going fast .. I choosed to stay faithful to him never dated any guy and boom out of no where in a random friday day he traveled from his contry to mine to ask me for reconciliation with a heart crying and really loving, after 6 month then we got engaged , life is beautiful and most of all god is real , i pray for all of you to get wht you want and feel the fulfulliment you're looking for, keep in mind, ANAYTHING IS POSSIBLE and dont believe anyone saying to you it's not , lovee❤
I would like to know the full story. ❤
that’s amazing, I wish you both the best life together ❤️❤️❤️🥰
congratulations
No contact helps you love yourself even more 💯
No contact isn't to "get the other person back," no contact is for YOU. If you do no contact correctly, you get the time and perspective to see that relationship for what it was and realize someone better is on their way. It's easy to think, when you're wrapped up in someone, that just because they're the best you've had so far it means they're the best you'll ever get. Most of the time, if you really committed to no contact and invested all that energy back into yourself, by the time your ex shows back up you've taken reconciliation off the table.
Sounds boring bruh
Revolution 2020, how true! No contact, means forever! Leave with dignity and self respect. No reconciliation! If they come back sooner or later they’ll leave just the same. 8 billion people iin the planet, the “one” is out there for you!!! Blessings
Exactly especially when you are dealing with a female narcassist
Yeah 8 billion people in the world but not where you live, so you have to travel the world to find the one lol so stupid when people use that logic
Dumb isn't it!?
Out of that maybe a handful of possible options for a variety of reasons. So narrow-minded advice.
I've traveled the World for many years, lived many different Countries, had been on over thirty different dating apps and sites and still didn't encountered a fraction of a percentage they are talking about lol Not to mention quality of those options!
Exactly 👌💯 Detach move on. We meet people in life for a reason. Never regret relationships it was what we wanted at that time. Good Memories and sometimes lessons . Self love always ❤✌️🌎
Some people need to realise that everyone we meet actually teaches us something about ourselves to ,
I’ve gone no contact because I’m doing me
yeah god send those people to ur life to check ur abundance for urself n he keep letting send until u come out of it
My ex really hurt me. I thought everything was good and I felt secure. She out of nowhere broke up with me right after I moved 200 miles to be close to her after driving there every weeekend for about 5 months, through snow storms, covid lockdown restrictions, I was crushed. She always kept in contact though, I finally got her to admit she liked this other guy more but he was married and he left his wife to be with her. Well, her always contacting me and checking on me always kept me in a broken hearted state. I finally blocked her on everything and I started feeling 100 times better. When I'd talk to her I would get so happy and feel on top of the world, then I'd feel so depressed and sad. Forget about your ex, she's stealing your energy.
I was fool enough to contact an ex. She was in an already crappy relationship, and we slept a couple times. The guy broke up with her, she went depressed BUT kept contact with him in some sports teams almost daily. Nevertheless she was texting me all day long, called me a couple times a day (at least), but I was clear in my non-platonic intentions. She went from reluctantly accepting to outright rejecting me, so I quit. She went MAD about it.
I now can feel the energy she was sucking out of me. Don’t make my same mistake, guys.
I feel this. Just had the same happen; we were talking about me moving there and she expressed she was all in. Then did an about face about 10 days later and completely curb stomped me. This message is what I needed today, I've been expending too much of my energy trying to stay in contact and I just need to go no contact and focus on myself. It's been draining me.
W-H-A-T T-H-E F-U-C-K. Get a sex doll. Never go out of your way for her.
I love this and what Aaron says about “stop abandoning yourself.” I think he is describing the ideal state for no contact, but I also think it’s okay to just practice the behavior of no contact even if you can’t get a person out of your head. Fake it til you make it. If you have an anxious attachment style, it will be very hard to stop focusing thoughts on a person, but Aaron’s advice of stopping the social media stalking and all forms of contact will be a great place to start. Eventually you will get there energetically too.
Betsy Truberg, no contact means to let go for ever. Leave graciously and with dignity. Where there’s mutual love there’s grace and peace. Love is not stressful at all. No begging, no bread crumbs… you deserve better. Blessings
I think he ìs out to lunch no psychology degree... psychotic amnesia some answers of their life some serious counseling whether they are even capable of being in one...again ? did you actually surgically break up or just walk out of each other's lives? Energy man .. energy... space and your own energy.. feeling energy mandatory you don't want them in your life, they know that, but they ended up being your best friend anyway they can't even tell about your energy man... this person choosed me and is trying to be non criminal about it.
Yessss❤
I love how you supported having a conversation before you go no contact and displaying vulnerability. Often times going no contact may seem like ghosting someone,but what sets them apart is having just that one conversation before you decide to step away.
I wanted to have a last conversation, but he didn’t give me the chance so I sent a goodbye message saying that I understand and I will honor his decision and wish him the best. I started my no contact after that. No drama.
Yeah I didn’t I just did no contact so it looks like o ghosted. I feel bad but I know no had to do it.
My partner lied to be for months, looked into my eyes and lied..over and over again. Made me question my sanity. Made up stories. Swore on his kids life. I went no contact. He didn't deserve any kind of message from me.
No I’m going no contact because I’m done! I was giving love, compassion and wanted to be there for this man. I was faithful, I shared everything I had. I was a woman. I was there when he was drunk. I was there when he felt like alone. I was there when he needed encouragement. Im done! He lost a friend as well. Im not chasing him no more. I never want to see him ever again in life. I forgive him. Just don’t want to ever see him again. He loved to see me hurting.
Hes just saying focus on you but dont always feel hurt. He will realise in his own time. Yes do new things. Look after you.
I can so relate !
I was there for my man too through all the drunken nights all the hours on the phone supporting him just hurting myself over and over. Then when I try to move on, he comes back.
💔😢 I broke up with him and four days later he was at my door. Not to make up and say I’m sorry but just for sex and not doing the boyfriend girlfriend thing anymore 😢💔 hurts so bad
I’m in NO CONTACT MODE now
I hope he stays away
Happy for you
No contact is to get energy back not to be spiteful. Brilliant advice ❤️
❤
No contact helps you in so many different levels. It’s helped me loving myself and knowing my self worth. I have been in no contact for 3 months now and I still have my days not gonna lie but at the end of the day I got me ❤
Same here...i love me...he hqd grabbed my peace
I can relate to all of this. I know for a fact that I have an anxious attachment style and the person that interests me often takes over my mind completely.
I am going no-contact, but I still occasionally have dreams with this person where I'm attempting to seek their validation. It's hard to fall asleep in the first place because of the conversations I keep imagining. It sucks.
Yeah this advice doesn't work for us, it's OK to try to look after yourself and try new hobbies but your in your own head for 24nhours a day no way to escape
any update on your no contact?
The mission in your message is so relevant. Please never stop providing your knowledge and healing
~. It's crazy how many screwed over people there are. I too have a complicated AF situation and doing the work of self improvement an no contact for the sake of my mental health.
Thank you for your assistance and guidance through out this mission my guy. 🙏🏻🙌🏼
Hope everyone here finds the strength within to get through whatever it is your struggling with. Im taking it as a "new start, clean slate" mentality so hope that helps.
Have a great day and remember...
No contact isn't to get a significant other back but to get YOU back. 💥
One day at a time. 👊🏼😏
Mario R , no contact for me was to cut off forever, no matter the pain. Our dignity and self respect comes first . They will value you more then, and search for you, but yet again, now it’s “too late”….made of my mind and letting go was recovering my own self, lots of energy and new things, new friends and a great husband!!! It hurts and takes time but you eventually recover, thanks God! Blessings
@@carmenkamberos1156 true real talk
@@carmenkamberos1156it's completely different for each relationship you just think you are special
Yes I highly believe in no contact too. One of my ex bfs send me a letter recently. I didn’t read the letter I didn’t want to know how he was doing I threw it right into the trash. Of course a part of me found it really tempting but I didn’t want to exchange any of my energy with his and give the universe wrong signs. I don’t want any contact. I think that is the best thing to do in a lot of situations.
Its great to focus on yourself but ive found that it has to come naturally and doesnt until you reach that point from within. You can try to force yourself to forget them all day long but it wont happen until the moment when it naturally happens inside.
I agree . It’s very hard but it definitely has to come naturally
This makes perfect sense. It’s as if you’re in my head right now. Amazing.
This popped up in my feed and I really needed to hear it. I didn’t realize I was abandoning myself in reaching for connection and proving my worth. I got closure yesterday by saying “I am not continuing this connection. Your actions do not match your words and I’m sick of being ghosted constantly. Good luck.”
It’s hard not to check socials and you grieve memories with the person as well but it does get better. 💕 I’m going to block socials to keep from checking and I’m combining EFT on limiting beliefs of worthiness and not being enough as well as abandonment issues.
Thank you for your content!
I’ve been no contact for 2 years . Best thing I ever did!
I would like to add one small bit for those who have divorced but still co-parent, you can have no contact on everything he just said BUT, when you do need to communicate for the children's sake, keep it 100% like a business conversation. Texts are short and direct and usually involve scheduling of schooling, doctor appointments, and anything related to the well-being of the kiddos.
Thanks for this reminder, I won't be abandoning myself again. ❤
this is the most helpful no contact video I’ve ever watched. I nodded the whole time, you said everything that needed to be said. Thank you Aaron for reminding us that the only thing that matters when it comes to no contact, is ourselves.
Smashed this Aaron. 100% agree, totally works, focusing on you and your energies, forgetting them, and out the blue, they are trying to get back into your life with a random text.
There is a time that what you think the other person makes you feel it is in you and in reality you are the creator of that energy not the other person...💯💯💯💯
Mirrors ..thats so true of twinflames. But also all soulmates, iv found 💕 xxx
So true. I used to miss her so much and the fun and excitement I thought she brought into my life. But then I looked back and thought deeply remembering clearly that I was the one who put that fun and excitement into our interactions.
This! 💞💞💞
That is what I did consciously ….. took my time off without that person To come back to my own energy … with no expectation of coming back …. ❤🎉
What a good message. Self-abandon is the core issue, indeed. It takes courage and work to accept oneself and grow. So worth it in the end. Thank you, Aaron.
My boyfriend broke up with me three weeks ago, I reached out a couple of times, but he never responded. So I went no contact, and I am working on self care now.
When I'm present and I feel it when someone thinks about me, sometimes their image pops in my mind so I see a lot of truth in this information in this video. Sometimes a client I haven't seen for even a year or more just pops in my head and I know virtually 100% of the time they will reach out within days to book and appointment. Out thoughts really are that powerful. Aloha
Lol bunch of bs
Very interesting to read. I also think about a person very often and then suddenly the person appears in the physis. Do u think, when you think about a person, the other Person also thinks about you? I try to figure out if we do telepathy or does it comes from a place of wanting the person around me…
@@LuanaKoch very common that when you’re thinking about somebody, they are thinking about you. Not all the time, of course, but common.
This happens to me all the time!! It freaked me out so I decided to do an experiment. I started thinking very hard about my sister. I was thinking for her to message me. A few hours later she did. We would talk every couple of weeks. This is for sure real. You are on the same frequency.
I do "No contact" because I'm elevating to a 5d reality. Their energy holds me back and I'm ok with old relationships wanting to stay in a 3d reality. 😎
This advice is really helpful for me. I’m in a situation like this and I’ve accepted that I need to let go and start showing up for myself.
Thank you Aaron for sharing your priceless wisdom! It has been a real rough time going no contact with someone I hung out with everyday the past year and made so many new memories/experiences I’ve wanted all my life with to nothing at all and this person texting me “be gone” as a ways of breaking up with me and telling me they don’t want me in their life anymore as an anxiously attached person..one of the most heartbroken I felt in my 22 years of life so far. I’ve been learning a lot about myself and my fault in the approach I have to intimate relationships I share and how much I lose myself & my dreams for others. Not anymore, I will be there for myself before I am others from now on till I am back on solid ground in my own presence. I will increase my self worth and respect one day at a time 💪🏼 stay strong everyone, life isn’t for weak souls that’s why you exist!
Very worldly but informational…things take time, don’t destroy your morals & values & be true to Christ & the good that is inside of you when the devil tries to tear you apart! This is why it’s important to know Gods word as well as the woman you choose to intertwine your soul with as we are connected in our mind, body, & souls. Choose the hard right & do good because simply it is good to be good! Forgive one another & stop holding onto the past to live present in the future or the devil will keep dragging you back down reminding you to keep you at a current state. Stop blaming your trauma & take accountability for your actions…do unto others as you would have done unto yourself!
"Stop abandoning yourself".... that hits hard
Oh I needed this today…. I’m going through it right now in a complicated situation. Thanks!
I feel ya girl....i once had a narrcist ex
I needed this... I've been needing this for months, maybe even years. Thank you so much ❤ I'm beginning to heal
You encouraged me to talk to her, truly talk to her, tell her everything, it's going to be one of the hardest conversations I'll have.
Good for you being brave. I hope it went well.
6 years in a relationship and we both just left each other mutual separation. It’s been about 60 days and I can say I’m completely have moved forward and don’t even think of my ex at all. Yesterday I got a call from her during the day and at night but I didn’t answer. Just feel if I answer than I’m going backwards again when I’m so motivated to move forward and start my life fresh and new. Thankful I don’t know how but everyday that goes by I feel stronger and better with myself and I’m even getting to the point of meeting somebody soon. So if anybody is feeling down no contact is the best way to go and not to get your ex back but for you to move forward with your life. Remember they are your ex for a reason always keep that in mind. Good luck everybody!
Or you never truly loved each other, especially if it took you 8 weeks to move on, get used to it you'll not likely be in a life long relationship with this mindset
Thank you so much this. It resonated with me 100%. I now know what I am going to do. I could never understand why I kept making the same wrong decision again and again. I did meditation and the voice spoke to me telling me how I was abandoned at the age of 11. I had buried this 44 year's ago. It was a EurekAlert moment. This person is still very much in my life but I now have to let him go. I thank him for being my teacher. Lesson learnt. I now must start to unpack the abandonment from my childhood. Figured out why I kept going in the same circles over and over and over. Thank you ❤❤❤
I would love to see a video of you talking about the energy of “stringing people along” or “bread crumbing” and the energy and childhood dynamic going between both parties in that situation.
That also still comes down to one having an anxious attachment style (the one who lets themselves get breadcrumbed) and the avoidant attachment style (the one who does the breadcrumbing)
Nah. Not pulling back with no contact because I want outcome with being with him. I just don't NEED to be in this relationship. I don't chase, never did, never will. I'm comfortable and confidant within. If he comes back, I'll see what I'll decide to do. It's all good.
Aaron you have changed my life. Thank you. I would be so much more of a mess without your videos and advice. Ive been no contact for a little over a week because I am no longer abandoning myself. Thank you!!
This is exactly what I teach my clients in a domestic violence program. So glad to hear someone speak the same language on the same topic. Great video!
This is so true I try explain this to my friends but they just don't get it they think if they do this the person us going to leave instead it makes the relationship stronger or repairs the relationships! Distance makes the heart grow stronger!
No contact is like fasting and tithing. It works.
Every word Aaron pronounced in this video is simply golden. What a hero this guy is!
I just got out of a 4 1/2 year relationship and we were engaged to get married. 1 month before our wedding, she walked out of my life. I’m 36 years old, I felt like she was the one. I spent the last 4 years investing into her school and career , our relationship and it’s abrupt end has been really tough. I’m starting to see though that we probably both had some sort of abandonment issues…. She kept wanting to come back , just to have sex with me, and I emotionally couldn’t handle it bc I’m in love with her and that’s not what I want. I’ve went full no contact to work on myself, but it’s still a brutal reality to face.
@mattcanflyhigh, yes, that was very inconsiderate of your g/f to leave you just like that. For whatever reasons, she left, the pain, hurt and disappointment are really brutal, so cold!!! Only God can help you overcome this mortal blow! Turn to Jesus, and ask for His guidance and love. Go to a full gospel church where you can find support and counseling, healthy friends too. Nowadays people have no problem hurting other people’s feelings, no shame, no heart! No wonder society is so rotten, drugs, crime etc. No feelings, so much materialism!!! Incredible !!! Stay strong and don’t go back to her for nothing. You deserve better. Plenty of fish in the ocean… Blessings
So true about the energy fields happens to me with many ppl I’m connected to - so on point! Thank you ✌🏻
Perfect timing! Thank you SO much for your service ❤️🌍✨💯🌈🦁🧘🏽♀️🙏🏽💃🏽📚
thank you very much this was my medicine for today!! going through this atm. first I initially broke up because it was toxic, then she dragged me back in because she was being needy but she was guilt tripping me... then I fell for it and then she turned around and dumped me after she felt better about the break up lol obviously more to it on a personal level.. but we got this people.. know ur self worth, move away from those toxic people.. remember we are good people and want the best.
To anyone reading this, there will be ups and downs. I’m going through this right now, lack of sleep is the worst!!
8 year relationship, ended in 45 seconds via FaceTime. No conversation, or courtesy or feelings towards the length of our time together. Not one word!
I’m now 24 days NC from the very end of that phone call. I’m trying to tell myself that I’m in a good place, although I’m struggling a lot.
I’m finding it difficult to pull my energy back. Watching a lot of these videos, meditation, self concept meditation and learning about attachment styles.
Just as a side I’m a middle aged guy, I go gym 5 days/week, good job and life. But I do still miss my relationship, as we did have many good memories.
You, yes, you!
Stay strong, the universe has got your back.
✌️
I'm going through a break after 10yrs with 1 kid...it socks but it's well
You’ve got this. literally have to focus your thoughts on you.
Same thing happened to me, cut off like I never existed, Its been 6 weeks and still spend everyday thinking about her. I contacted her once 2 weeks ago and it didn't go well it just resurfaced all the pain.
I hope your life has got easier and don't fold like i did. We deserve better 🙏
Excellent job! You're on the right path. Keep it up. A little bit of time and you'll be better than you've ever been! You'll be grateful for the pain you went through!
34 days NC
I’m staying strong, the book ‘Attached’ was a real eye opener for me as was Corey Wayne’s, 3% man. Both have helped completely change how I view and interact in relationships.
I’ll use those as fuel as I cont on this journey.
It’s not all good though. Sleep or lack thereof is really bad. Just can’t seem to stay asleep. I know it’ll get better I just hope it’s soon.
Stay strong 💪🏻
I'm 7 days into no contact, I'm truly struggling, but I will stay strong. But my fear is this time away helps her move on.
any update man? currently in the same boat
@@ProdBySinister Hey mate, I couldn't do it, I wasn't strong enough. I lasted 2 weeks and had to reach out. She was happy to hear from me. Then we got stuck in the friends zone. I know she was chatting to others and wanted her options open. We went back and forth for many weeks. But the videos are correct in they need to see you in a different light and feel they can lose you. It was only till I said I can't do this any more I need to cut you out of my life all together she seemed to notice and make an effort. We are now back together and I'm learning not to be so needy and give her space. So far it's working.
That’s great to hear! I’m glad you were able to recover your relationship. I’m facing the same issue right now and it’s tough…. I feel like my ex is confused.. we been together for 3 years.. and she completely just started ignoring me out of the blue… I became really needy at that point. Trying everything to show her that I am promoting and accepting change in our lives. But she would continue to not talk to me.. I feel our relationship has been one sided.. but it’s just really hard to come to terms.. and accept.. I view my self with more value now that I have been these last few days.. but at the same time I miss her terribly..
@@michaelg4044 mate that's really hard. Especially when the communication is only one sided and only one person is making all the effort. The advantage I had that even when we were broken up and she couldn't see a future there was communication so I decided to play and take a chance on the friend thing. It finally worked out. But it was also hit and miss.
@@droflivelife I’ll stay strong for now and see what happens!
It's time to be me , because I love myself more ❤ but the mind goes for the anxious attachment road ....it's also mainly , maybe due to past experiences ...but happy that yesterday gave the day to myself I spent , the dusk reading a book by the sea 🙏, no phone before bed , just me and God , being present in the moment
Rather than just saying “focus on yourself rather than waiting for his text” this is way more effective and understandable advice. I tried protest manipulation but like you said couldn’t hide needy energy when I meet him again because of all the emotional rollercoaster I was on while on the protest period. This video and few other of yours totally changed my perspective and I already feel better about myself and about letting go. Thank you.
I’ve recently collected part of my inner child from the 3 month old version of me . I feel so much more complete now ❤️
I was definitely an anxious attachment
May I ask how did you accomplish doing That???
Following
@@christielee1840 asking myself why I get extremely attached and why I makes me feel very anxious when I loose that attachment, accepting that there was an issue with me that kept repeating the same cycle of attracting avoidant attachments , I know there’s nothing wrong with me yet I continue to connect with men that I feel I have to prove my worth them and I actually don’t at all , yet my body still filled with anxiety regardless has to how I saw myself. When we are young and we loose a connection with one of our parents or both , we start to tune into the environment to find some kind of connection… I became aware that I’ve always gone to my mum for acceptance and validation. So I asked my mum who’s very emotionally unstable when she had her first breakdown , it was when I was 3 months old
Since I became aware of this I’m not the little broken girl anymore my inner child feels complete
I’ve been on a journey of self discovery for around 5 years now and there was always a part of me that I felt I was lacking .
Since then I’ve actually been able to stand up to my mum and not just please her for acceptance or validation. Awareness is the key , go right back through your adult years and teenage until you was first born
Ask your family and friends how it was when you was a baby or child growing up
For many years I had the idea that my upbringing was perfect, a false imagine that my mind designed which left me believing that’s there’s something wrong with me
❤️❤️❤️
@@christielee1840 u have to do the shadow work..theres many vids to describe this n give u help. Its usually around ur parents n early lifes' lessons that brought on beliefs tjat dont serve us. They are usually attatched to what society expects n what we conformed to. These days we dont need to live this way any more. It served the masses for 100s of yrs but only coz the family made us conform. We have to re learn the truth n not the illusions we've conformed to.
Hope this helps too 🤗💕 xxx
@@intenselyrich3517uk yes I’ve also been doing the shadow work too ❤️
I’m a former substance addict too, you know for 7 years I never owned a mirror , I couldn’t even look at my own reflection ok a window so I had curtains up .
I absolutely used to hate myself Christie. Then I turned it all around and I also look at myself in the mirror and talk to myself and tell myself that I am worthy , I am loved , ❤️
We had a great dynamic. But I’m focusing on myself and if it’s meant to come back, it will.
I’ll be replaying this video once in a blue. I’ll be needing this reminder. I thank you. 🤜
This is so beautiful- you are worthy because you are you! Thanks Aaron - timeless advice for all ages
I was using no-contact as a cope thinking I'd get them back. Now I know I'm doing it for myself.
I'm definitely going to do this. Starting .... 3 2 1..---NOW!!!
I personally don't like the no contact scenario for me, because it = the silent treatment= crazy making rollercoaster ride of resentment.
I truly understand the energy dynamics.
Sometimes you have to walk away and it's soul crushing especially when it involves family. I just lower my expectations and send that person healing energy.
Great video!
Very true. It just becomes a back and forth game. Very draining. Better to just walk away sometimes.
That’s because you actually have to block their access to you and not just keep ignoring texts-I don’t know why he didn’t say this, but you actually block the person so you can’t get those crazy texts or calls from them breeding resentment. Just block them for awhile after explaining why. You can always unblock them later.
Mulhouse, no contact to me means walking away forever, no matter the pain!!! If you get them back they’ll still break away from you later on. Leave the relationship with dignity and self respect. Plenty of fish in the ocean. Blessings
@@carmenkamberos1156you'll be a lone forever with that attitude I get why someone would dump you if you think they can be replaced
I Never know, all my chasing, all my choices, all my relationships all based on childhood trauma, and scapegoat of narcissists family members... most sadness things, Nobody worthy of my chase, It's childhood wounds, deepest wounds...
Mark Twain are you seeing a therapist? This might help you in your relationships in the future. Blessings
Why would you want someone, who dumped you, back in your life? I feel like, once that person ends relationship with you, you need to just move on with your life. Unless you did something bad and made them leave you, they don't deserve 2nd chance. If the reason they left you is because you cared too much, then f'em.
Hey man. Your my hero. I did that a few times in my life. And this last time works faster, even with a really special person to me. I tried to be friend but was so bad for me that I decided to do my way. I have a lot of respect for your knowledge.
This will definitely help me. I will pull the energy back to myself. I am worthy! ✨
i love you man , you helped me out. im anxious , i have been there here in that position and im better than before trying atleast. its hard but going better. im glad for the opportunity i got in the first place too.
Aaron, thank you for this video. I finally understood what you meant and you explained so well that I think I can finally turn my no contact into something meaningful.
Thank you. I must have maniested this video 😁 this is exactly what I needed to hear, thank you for explaining it all so well
This no contact helps alot cause you actually start to have boundaries and having control over you life..
Both reasons, I'm doing it for me because I want respect and I can only get that by respecting myself but if it helps this person to realise how much they appreciate what I bring to the table then I would like that too. We were so close and now I don't understand why she is pulling away she told me we are soul mates.
Woman aren't as nice as they let on, men grow more attached usually and build a life around this person but women will walk when it suits them as they have more options, men have to chase women it's be taught so as soon as there's a breakup women have options men have to work for options
Man I have been struggling with a break up and this video has given me some really good clarity to move forward with my life. Thank you
Just what I needed and just in time (only 2 days have past of being dumped). Something clicked in me and I feel my power back. Thanks man. I’m in debt.
NO CONTACT = - ENERGY WASTED.
+ ENERGY = YOU HAPPY 😊
YOU HAPPY = OTHER MISSES YOU 😢
IMPORTANT = YOU HAPPY WITH YOURSELF
YOU = WORTHY
You never tell the other person you are going to go no contact
Thank you Aaron, this is really something that I was thinking of doing, you put a name/label/deeper explanation in it. It is actually virtuous--while thinking of no contact taking care of yourself in the process, removing yourself from an already hurtful situation. but also somewhat wishing the other person to be well. I'm now trying to CHOOSE ME over anybody else (in a nurturing way---a not so easy task being a people pleaser and an empath not just with my romantic relationship), and having a glimpse of little success day by day giving a balm to my wounded soul.... I hope other people having such experiences will also benefit from it. GOD bless you!
No contact is all about you!!! Not manipulating other people, cut that person out of your life for good!!! Let go of it , focus on you, turn that negative sad energy inward and use it to motivate you to improve yourself!!!! There other woman out there, better woman that won’t play games with you ….. focus on you, everything else will fall into place…. Don’t ever let someone use you !!!!
Depends on the situation, if you fucked up then it's hard to cut someone out of your life
@@Caolan-b6r I didn’t fuck up !!! She’s 22 I’m 54!!! There’s no future in that and I wouldn’t ever date anyone her age no matter how smokin hot she is!!! Ever!!! I made the right choice in ghosting her and blocking her number…. She needs to play with guys more her own age!!!!
Wow you just opened my eyes to something i was doing.... anxious attachment and pulling away so they can look for me in manipulation..... damn hit hard. Thank you..... ❤️
Stop giving your energy to the narcissist. Stop breadcrumbing. Bring all your energy back to self. Move on to you.
In case anyone is wondering, ghosting is not the answer. I found out the hard way that you need to phone block the person otherwise they will reach out by a few days and break the no contact rule by getting upset why you are not responding now. Do not just ignore a person, block them so it really gives you both space. You can always unblock them. But I was stuck in a very strong dynamic where if I did start to create boundaries and do no contact, he would ask where I was or what’s up. So if anyone is wondering, you do need to actually block their access to you as well in order for this to really work. Especially if they are hot & cold with you, or you are an option for their future when ready, trust me, if you just ignore them or “ghost” it could get ugly rather than giving respectful space. Also like Aaron said, let them know you are blocking them too with giving yourself and them closure so it’s not a surprise when they try to text or call.
No contact is bullshit. It means it is game over.
If someone wants to have a relationship of any kind, contact is needed!. Without contact, effort and willingness, there is no relationship.
Agree completely but lord this life has been hard. My standards are on the floor because I was badly abused by my family so that's all I've felt like I deserved in life. I have CPTSD and it's hard enough to regulate myself on a daily basis, let alone try to make a living. I'll stay single for the rest of my life if that protects me because my precious heart and soul deserves to be treated well, loved and cherished.
Really enjoy your channel, your vibes, your advice, humility, and grace. Been a blessing at this point in my life.
Today I came across your channel 👍👍 the more I watch a video about manifestion the more i started dislike my ex I started hating me I don't care if he has no contact let him go back I don't lose him he lose me
I mean I hate him more
You are my morning sunrise! thank you for this video .. Its exactly what i needed to hear ❤
After all these years I still come back to listen to you. Thanks bro
Sometimes you have to make a choice, between life and health, it’s sad to be pushed that far,
Went from being his destiny to hell shapeshifter
3 months now, still thinking trauma, but also healing, focusing on myself, can’t keep giving carrying others responsibilities😢😭they are shapeshifters everything you want then the mask comes off🥵
Thank you this helps, keep my eyes on improving healing myself😢🥵🙏
It’s not hard being loving giving helpful kind
No closure with a lying abuser manipulative thief😢silence is golden, trauma hurts😢😭
In MBTI introverted thinking (Ti) and extroverted feeling (Fe) work on an axis. So Ti automatically produces Fe. And Fe produces Ti.
So Aaron is correct that thinking about someone is coupled with releasing energy to them.
Interestingly Aaron is an ENFP who prefers introverted feeling (Fi) which is coupled with extroverted thinking (Te) which executes external actions. So the best thing he could do is use Fi by bringing back his energy to him which gives more power to him to execute external changes in his life. Which he does.
That makes sense why he teaches the way he does.
I know you took a pause from making these relationship advice videos. But I'm really thankful for this, I have been watching youtube videos/ for advice ALL day long. And your words/ and delivery really helped and made the difference. Thank you and God Bless you, Aaron.
My gf started to be behave colder, saying to me " I don't have time for you" and so on, so I decided to not contact her for 1 week, and I decided it tonight. I want see her reaction, how long she will resist without me :| I love her a lot, we have 1 year and 6 months together, non stop contact, but I think is time to do a pause, to be recharged, but she changed after started work
Ok, she was sleeping with her teammate, she told me it tonight, after started work in bank, she started to cheat on me, is so terrible feeling
@@michaelshollaj6428much power to you 👍 . Going through the same thing , my bf cheated on me , it’s really hard.
this is a whole other level when its your own child. It so much easier to do when its not your own flesh.
Aaron!! Yesss!! This today came up on my feed.. Is YT listening?! Hehe. Thanks a lot.. Kicked my ass into shape in my current situation
Had the same thought when it came up on my YT feed 😀
They don’t care anymore. Even if you go no contact, and they are doing the deed with someone else or multiple people, all they will feel is pity towards you because “their hearts have changed it’s mind on how they feel about you”. If you have ever had a change of heart on someone else, and they come back to you, and you felt nothing no more for them at that time, all you would do is feel pity and sorry for them that they still have feelings for you and you don’t. It’s like, you feel sorry that one time you had feelings for them and led them to that point but now, it’s gone, and you feel bad and ashamed to have liked them at one point. It also feels like a nuisance if they come back asking you to be with them again, but you don’t want to be with them anymore because there are no more feelings left in you for them. It’s a sucky feeling all the way around. No one wins in the end.
Man ur wise...keep up vids. U have to be helping lots of people.
Wow, this is by far the best explanation of No Contact that I have ever heard.
Finding it so hard to be vulnerable. Just want to clear my head but can't bring myself up to this difficult task so staying in no contact with patience and in silence.
So grateful for these videos. I'm learning a lot and feeling hopeful again.
I love the positive vibes here my friend ❤ i hope in true love. True love can be lost but will always come back