ไม่สามารถเล่นวิดีโอนี้
ขออภัยในความไม่สะดวก

How to deal with rejection

แชร์
ฝัง
  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 23 ม.ค. 2023
  • Dig into the psychology of why rejection causes us pain, and explore strategies to cope with this common experience.
    --
    Rejection hurts. It’s incredibly painful to feel like you’re not wanted - and we do mean painful. Researchers found that we relate rejection to being “hurt,” using terms like “crushed” or “broken-hearted.” So, why does rejection trigger such a strong response, and is there any way to cope with this unique kind of pain? Explore common strategies to help you process this emotional experience.
    Directed by Caitlin McCarthy.
    This video made possible in collaboration with Character Lab
    Learn more about how TED-Ed partnerships work: bit.ly/TEDEdPa...
    A special thanks to Mark Leary who provided information and insights for the development of this video.
    Support Our Non-Profit Mission
    ----------------------------------------------
    Support us on Patreon: bit.ly/TEDEdPat...
    Check out our merch: bit.ly/TEDEDShop
    ----------------------------------------------
    Connect With Us
    ----------------------------------------------
    Sign up for our newsletter: bit.ly/TEDEdNew...
    Follow us on Facebook: bit.ly/TEDEdFac...
    Find us on Twitter: bit.ly/TEDEdTwi...
    Peep us on Instagram: bit.ly/TEDEdIns...
    ----------------------------------------------
    Keep Learning
    ----------------------------------------------
    View full lesson: ed.ted.com/les...
    Dig deeper with additional resources: ed.ted.com/les...
    Animator's website: c8l.in
    ----------------------------------------------
    Thank you so much to our patrons for your support! Without you this video would not be possible! Olivia Fu, Kari Teffeau, Cindy Lai, Rajath Durgada Manjunath, Dan Nguyen, Chin Beng Tan, Tom Boman, Karen Warner, Iryna Panasiuk, Aaron Torres, Eric Braun, Sonja Worzewski, Michael Clement, Adam Berry, Ghaith Tarawneh, Nathan Milford, Tomas Beckett, Alice Ice, Eric Berman, Kurt Paolo Sevillano, Jennifer Heald, Megulo Abebe, isolwi, Kate Sem, Ujjwal Dasu, Angel Alberici, Minh Quan Dinh, Sylvain, Terran Gimpel, Talia Sari, Katie McDowell, Allen, Mahina Knuckles, Charmaine Hanson, Thawsitt, Jezabel, Abdullah Abdulaziz, Xiao Yu, Melissa Suarez, Brian A. Dunn, Francisco Amaya, Daisuke Goto, Matt Switzler, Peng, Tzu-Hsiang, Bethany Connor, Jeremy Shimanek, Mark Byers, Avinash Amarnath, Xuebicoco and Rayo.

ความคิดเห็น • 813

  • @TEDEd
    @TEDEd  ปีที่แล้ว +230

    Shout out to all the multi-lingual people who are helping us spread the word about our new language channels. We've passed 1,000 subscribers on each new channel will you help us reach our super ambitious goal of 5,000 subscribers in 1 month? Here are they are: German - bit.ly/TEGYTC, Hindi - bit.ly/TEdHYTC, Japanese - bit.ly/TEJYTC, Mandarin - bit.ly/TEdMYTC.

    • @yellowstarproductions6743
      @yellowstarproductions6743 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Cool

    • @MB-tj4wr
      @MB-tj4wr ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Hello ted can you transfer to tagalog?many young filipino also watching you especially me.

    • @ahlee2
      @ahlee2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Well done 👍

    • @azkaazeylia
      @azkaazeylia ปีที่แล้ว

      can i help to translate?

  • @whitewalker9862
    @whitewalker9862 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +2403

    The worst kind of rejection is when someone gets close to you, gives you hope to be together and then reject you. This kind of behavior is beyond cruel.

    • @EchelonPandora
      @EchelonPandora 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +130

      It happened to me earlier this year and I even go to a psychologist because of this

    • @darkprinceofdorne
      @darkprinceofdorne 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +64

      My heart is so broken

    • @DemonSlayerAnime
      @DemonSlayerAnime 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +116

      Self love mate.... that's how we beat this pain

    • @elzaocean
      @elzaocean 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

      Indeed

    • @Naan795
      @Naan795 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +41

      It’t difficult to know when to trust and put more emotions into these acts that seem to be from an honest interest but you don’t really know

  • @Ruby_Key
    @Ruby_Key ปีที่แล้ว +2712

    I'm glad that they didn't only consider romantic rejections but also platonic rejection as well. Belonging within a group is as important as belonging with someone (if not more).

    • @Ruby_Key
      @Ruby_Key ปีที่แล้ว +15

      @Mark McEwen i feel u bro

    • @ireneqq2300
      @ireneqq2300 ปีที่แล้ว +32

      i have had a few romantic breakups and yeah they hurt but nothing has ever hurt like being rejected by the one friend i actually talked everything with. When he said he didnt wish to talk to me anymore i was broken for weeks and a few times a say i would forget why i was sad and think "hm if im sad i should talk to him" only to remember. He is better off now we are apart and im not massively worse off (neutral effect at best) but damn it hurts.

    • @Ruby_Key
      @Ruby_Key ปีที่แล้ว +13

      @@ireneqq2300 im so sorry, youre prob a wonderful person, he prob just wanted something different. I remember breaking off with my bestfriend at the time cuz of a cold war between us and I wonder if she misses me too, cuz she was a very important part of my life. He may have moved on but you both have impacted each other more than you realized.

    • @LittleDogTobi
      @LittleDogTobi ปีที่แล้ว +6

      When I saw the title, I assumed they primarily meant rejection from interviews/school applications, etc. That's what I'm deeply scared of. 💀

    • @Ruby_Key
      @Ruby_Key ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@LittleDogTobi me too bro

  • @cho-tio5950
    @cho-tio5950 ปีที่แล้ว +877

    The most painful rejection was when they didn't tell you but made you feel it.

    • @esperanza7948
      @esperanza7948 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Me Right now 💔💔

    • @shadowfox2631
      @shadowfox2631 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

      I feel this hard😢

    • @heisenberg4939
      @heisenberg4939 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +26

      Even worse when they make you feel like they like you by calling you cute names and sending you cute pic's, but when you wanna make sure you ask them if they really like you and you are like they will definitely say yes, but bamm! "No, not really." Feels like a gunshot to my heart

    • @laurens9561
      @laurens9561 9 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@heisenberg4939 They might have a dysfunctional attachment style. Actions speak louder than words. They might not want you to get too close emotionally, so they lie about their true feelings.
      I am such a person, and I pretty much lost a relationship of 17 years because I was too afraid of opening up and telling her how much I love her. It's only part of the problems in my relationship, but perhaps it can help you understand such a person.
      You yourself are probably attracted to these kind of people for a reason as well.

    • @Gstifsyhbbds
      @Gstifsyhbbds 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      You said it 🥲

  • @AceAlbatros
    @AceAlbatros ปีที่แล้ว +974

    Anyone feeling rejection right now, know you’re loved and keep pushing on

    • @IRosamelia
      @IRosamelia ปีที่แล้ว +24

      Well said, if anyone here thinks life is cruel, remember you're not alone. God is with you!

    • @PFGFrankly
      @PFGFrankly ปีที่แล้ว +4

      I know. It still hurts but Im able to move forward. Just a big life change

    • @thehahvokexperience
      @thehahvokexperience ปีที่แล้ว +7

      I'm not loved, that why I was rejected

    • @AceAlbatros
      @AceAlbatros ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @@thehahvokexperience you are my brother! I’m here to talk if you want

    • @lozannevanniekerk5489
      @lozannevanniekerk5489 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      Thank you

  • @waifuchann5173
    @waifuchann5173 ปีที่แล้ว +906

    This hits hard when your classmates that you knew well suddenly ignores you after semester break.

    • @lolacat4122
      @lolacat4122 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      Yes

    • @nolsjawline
      @nolsjawline ปีที่แล้ว +7

      😔

    • @IRosamelia
      @IRosamelia ปีที่แล้ว +68

      Dude, that person does that because they themselves are dealing with emotional baggage. Don't worry, just leave them alone.

    • @ayyappanchithambaram4575
      @ayyappanchithambaram4575 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      @@IRosamelia 100%

    • @eee_eee
      @eee_eee ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @calileooo omg finally its here omit guyshsj mini ths here ITS HERE 🤬🤬💀🗿🗿🤯😤🤯🗿🤬

  • @slavic9437
    @slavic9437 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +80

    not gonna lie, the comments helped more than the video

  • @robertsvf
    @robertsvf ปีที่แล้ว +282

    To me, the worst rejection comes when you truly love someone, some group, or some job. They hold a piece of your consciousness that you cannot fully forget. When you are rejected on this level, it is more painful than simply not being recognized or accepted. I still carry pain from rejections more than 30 years ago (marriage) and 10 years ago (fired from job due to office politics).

    • @hhanie-ng5619
      @hhanie-ng5619 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      how did you overcome these rejection?

    • @robertsvf
      @robertsvf ปีที่แล้ว

      @@hhanie-ng5619 wow. Thanks for asking. I successfully dealt with infidelity via divorce as she wanted to continue the affair. I successfully dealt with the job loss by finding other positions in life where I was accepted and appreciated. My consciousness can never forget the heartbreak, but I can live mostly in the present and be grateful by recognizing the love that exists around me. I love my wife, dog, extended family, clean air, clean water, and all of nature's beauty to name a few.

    • @suvrojitroy1093
      @suvrojitroy1093 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      Really! It hurt that bad? I was deeply in love with a girl but she only considered me as a friend although the best friend nonetheless, still when she rejected me eventually, there were misunderstanding, fights and I was deeply hurt. What compounded the problem was that I had to go to office everyday and see her face as we were in the same team.
      A short term relationship with another girl, a job transfer and a change of city later, I was finally able to shake her off. I realised I was giving her too much importance, there is just one life and change is the only constant, people come and go etc. Also, out of sight out of mind seemed to have always worked for me.

    • @architchoudhary4782
      @architchoudhary4782 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      ​@@suvrojitroy1093 I've also been going through that. I was profoundly in love with a girl in my class, but she also considered me a mere friend --- albeit a very close one. It made me extremely self-concscious, not so much about my personality and behaviour (because I have been doing everything I can to be the best man I can be) but about my appearance... of which I cannot change much. This is because (a) she is gorgeous, and (b) she was attracted to another guy who was white and "good-looking" according to what you would see in Hollywood, for the most part. While I was Indian with an unusually big nose and a somewhat misaligned jaw (and a half-broken tooth). I felt like I didn't belong there, in the West with all these perfect people many of whom can essentially choose who they want to be with. The realisation that I can be the most virtuous, charismatic and successful man and still be rejected by someone I held so dear was jarring, and ever since I realised it was love I felt for her, I often feel a shiver of loneliness whenever I am very tired or am trying to go to sleep, thinking the moment would be so much more fulfilling if she were there next to me...
      Of course, it would not be particularly virtuous of me to continue to feel resentful about this rejection. She is a very kind and conscientious person. Even when she does not show it, she means good for everyone around her. It is just that at this point in her life, she might value appearance more than other aspects in a partner... and who knows, it might work out for her. Maybe she finds someone who is handsome _and_ a good man, in which case all the more power to her. Or maybe I'm completely wrong about her prioritising appearance and it's really some other reason for which she rejected me: it could be that I am inadvertently clinging on to whatever moral support I can get to degrade her personality, which is the last thing I should be doing if I really love her because it could just be WRONG.
      In any case, we have graduated and she is moving abroad for university. I wish nothing but the best for her, for me, and for everyone else in this world.
      r = a(1 - sin\theta)

    • @everythingaboutbcs1060
      @everythingaboutbcs1060 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      ​@@architchoudhary4782Bkl

  • @LEFT4BASS
    @LEFT4BASS ปีที่แล้ว +516

    I love that this doesn’t downplay how much rejection can hurt. Remember, accepting rejection gracefully doesn’t mean you have to pretend it doesn’t hurt. If you’re rejected romantically, it’s okay to take time away from the person who rejected you, or to even end the friendship permanently if you know you’ll never be satisfied being just friends with them.
    Relationships should be based on mutual consent and benefit, and if you can’t find a solution that you’ll both be happy in, there’s nothing wrong with ending it.

    • @SearchOfSelf
      @SearchOfSelf ปีที่แล้ว +16

      I can relate to this so much. Rejection hurts and it's okay to find ways to heal. If mutual consent and respect can't be found, it's best to end a friendship.

    • @artsbybware4790
      @artsbybware4790 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      EXACTLY

    • @soneforever09
      @soneforever09 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      This comment struck a cord in me. Maybe this is the sign I've been waiting for for 2 years. Maybe it's time to end things.

    • @wilragsdale7344
      @wilragsdale7344 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Thank you. I watch an inspirational video at the end of my every day and I found this one at the end of the day to help with what I went through tonight and I read your comment I thank you much

    • @asmrcrafts9279
      @asmrcrafts9279 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      I'm working on the first half of your comment right now. Needing space because I'm just so upset...

  • @chimi1924
    @chimi1924 ปีที่แล้ว +896

    Ask yourself:
    1. Relationship type. Acquantaince or long term?
    2. Low opinion of themselves
    3. Do the other person value the relationship as you do?
    Solution: Reconnect with those who value you.

    • @fromfareast3070
      @fromfareast3070 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      nobody values me :(

    • @yellowstarproductions6743
      @yellowstarproductions6743 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@becky5146 agreed

    • @ShimmeringPilgrim
      @ShimmeringPilgrim ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Do you learn English yesterday?

    • @MappingRobloxAnimations
      @MappingRobloxAnimations ปีที่แล้ว +12

      @@ShimmeringPilgrim Irony 💀

    • @Zurvanox
      @Zurvanox ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @@fromfareast3070 maybe you don’t value yourself, by writing this and expect someone else to value you as a replacement for your lacking self-value you display here. If not, it is up to you and only you to connect to others.

  • @WeheartPEACE_helene
    @WeheartPEACE_helene ปีที่แล้ว +179

    Rejection is protection. 🙏 been rejected by crushes, jobs, scholarships. But now I can’t ask for better things with a loving partner, a flexible job and about to do my master’s with a full scholarship. Rejections really serve as a sign that some things or people aren’t meant for me and save me headaches. I’ll embrace more rejections in the rest of my life 😊

    • @dhamotharan1734
      @dhamotharan1734 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Well said !

    • @evindrews
      @evindrews ปีที่แล้ว +16

      I don't think that is comforting for many. It feels like you can embrace rejection - because you already have what you want. (good partner, good job, etc) but if you didn't still have those things, or lose those things again, the pain returns. Rejection is rejection: usually it's not out of ill will, but it's also not out of protection.

    • @HaPhan-sw7sz
      @HaPhan-sw7sz 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Thank you for your sharing, that’s so deep❤❤❤

    • @Cookedgurl
      @Cookedgurl 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I'm so happy for you. I know it hurts 💔

  • @nawjoghschool2714
    @nawjoghschool2714 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +30

    Love you mom, for always being there at the toughest and the most painful of times, to help me heal.

    • @MaeveWinters
      @MaeveWinters 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      ❤❤❤

  • @cerarobert1989
    @cerarobert1989 ปีที่แล้ว +429

    I always get discriminated at college. First, I cried a lot. After that, I started caring less. It was so horrible that I isolated myself too much. Last week, when other class girl said my drawings are really good. It was the genuine compliment I got after a long time. I started crying. There are still good people out there, who would always enjoy your company. 🥰😊

    • @hansrajjat7171
      @hansrajjat7171 ปีที่แล้ว

      Good story 😂

    • @IRosamelia
      @IRosamelia ปีที่แล้ว +15

      Wow, you're very sensitive. Take good care of yourself! You don't need other people's approval, remember all the good stuff you have in your life.

    • @yabxx2317
      @yabxx2317 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Bro there isn't trust me or am unlucky asf

    • @berdwatcher5125
      @berdwatcher5125 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@yabxx2317 good old pessimism

    • @IRosamelia
      @IRosamelia ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@yabxx2317 Yab, there isn't what, good people out there? Or people who enjoy your company? It's not the same thing 🤔

  • @katakanta1941
    @katakanta1941 ปีที่แล้ว +97

    I've been rejected many times. Yet it's so human that I don't feel sad anymore

    • @djawhrkads5763
      @djawhrkads5763 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

      But how did you reach that

    • @ChurlzVA
      @ChurlzVA 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

      ​@djawhrkads5763 By literally being desensitized to rejection.

    • @nicebro8563
      @nicebro8563 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

      ​@@djawhrkads5763 Something happens so often that you have grown numb to it

  • @T-T....
    @T-T.... ปีที่แล้ว +482

    The worst rejection is the one that comes from the one you trusted the most.

    • @hassanahmed2441
      @hassanahmed2441 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Yes 😥

    • @esscate
      @esscate ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Damn anime rots the brain

    • @T-T....
      @T-T.... ปีที่แล้ว +7

      @@esscate Depends on which anime you watch

    • @dangerfly
      @dangerfly ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Easy solution: Trust no one. [cue X-files theme]

    • @n0nenone
      @n0nenone ปีที่แล้ว

      @@T-T.... nah it just does universally lmao

  • @alyshasmith4257
    @alyshasmith4257 ปีที่แล้ว +65

    Confident people can just brush rejection off but when you’re not confident you can’t... when you try so hard and want something so much to then get rejected is devastating, soul destroying. Constant rejection erodes any self esteem, everything . At its worst makes you want to just give up and make you suicidal 😢

    • @esperanza7948
      @esperanza7948 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Me right now 💔💔 I can’t breath it’s so painful

    • @remochii
      @remochii 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      Me too 💔💔

    • @snaald8552
      @snaald8552 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      Yeah.......tell me about it...😢

    • @aubriellemorgan
      @aubriellemorgan 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

      I don’t care how confident you are, rejection hurts when someone you care about or claims to care about you rejects you.

    • @sarafatani9084
      @sarafatani9084 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@esperanza7948its been months how are you feeling now? Does it get better
      Going through it rn

  • @liannecarbone6856
    @liannecarbone6856 ปีที่แล้ว +64

    It is so painful. As I get older and am single, it gets harder because indeed it is a survival instinct. I feel it! Glad someone is talking about it

  • @L0velyEla
    @L0velyEla 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +25

    It’s okay, your life does not depend on that person. If they reject you, it doesn’t mean that you have to go to your room, lock the doors, and cry for 2 hours into a pillow. You’re worth as much as that person. You are special and I’m sure you will find someone better in the future instead. You meet new people in your lifetime, you won’t always be stuck with those people or that person that rejected you. You should think about yourself first and then others, but don’t be too selfish. If you don’t think about your well-being and your mental health, you’re gonna be miserable and sad. Remember that there is over 1 million people that got rejected.

    • @afraislam9147
      @afraislam9147 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      You’re worth as much as that person

  • @kiarona.
    @kiarona. ปีที่แล้ว +38

    Definitely relate to the sentiments this video.
    Sometimes people reject you for reasons you can't understand. Those are harder to work through, because you genuinely can't figure out what went wrong so it's more difficult to reflect on what happened

  • @user-tv4lo9ch5v
    @user-tv4lo9ch5v ปีที่แล้ว +35

    Needed this. There's someone I'm interested in but the fear of getting rejected is holding me back from even trying my luck

    • @genie9845
      @genie9845 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Go ahead, nobody really knows what they're doing so there's always a chance

    • @zainab_hashmiii
      @zainab_hashmiii 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      any updates..?

  • @Simouno
    @Simouno ปีที่แล้ว +32

    Being rejected is a blessing in disguise, because once somebody makes it clear it doesn't want you, then you can move on and search for people out there who are craving to have you bust just didn't have the chance to tell you because you were wasting your time chasing an illusion. Move on from rejection and move towards what you deserve

    • @jordanpatton3622
      @jordanpatton3622 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Good advice, I think their are some people reaching out to me but due to some social anxiety it has been hard for me to connect. I’ll try to change to that. 😅

  • @hipnhappenin
    @hipnhappenin 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +25

    I've been flooded with breakup videos this week (because...algorithm) and this is the only one by far that I find being able to help me cope.
    Some key points I found helpful:
    -Just because someone couldn't show up in the way you wanted them to in the relationship doesn't mean they didn't care about it.
    -When we have low self-value it's easy to misconstrue neutral reactions as negative ones.
    -It's helpful to self-reflect and determine whether you were expecting more acceptance than was reasonable from your partner.
    -Your partner wants something different from the relationship, and sometimes what they want might be unreasonable or unfair.

  • @achaides
    @achaides ปีที่แล้ว +31

    I really love the realization that there is a difference between actual rejection, and you simply not getting the response you hoped for that may have been unreasonable to begin with

    • @theultimatereductionist7592
      @theultimatereductionist7592 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      "that may have been unreasonable" Uh... that is STILL rejection. Whether it is unreasonable by any imaginary objective standard would still not make it not rejection.

  • @yohohohoheyy
    @yohohohoheyy ปีที่แล้ว +30

    4:04 "The pain you're feeling is just part of your system, nudging you to think about your Interpersonal relationship"
    Gotta note this!

  • @Blue2x2x
    @Blue2x2x ปีที่แล้ว +55

    I just recently started going into the dating/hookup market. I had cases that I get a message to meet, I get excited and ready. And then they block me shortly before the meetup. It stings hard, but it's temporary.
    What helps is reminding yourself that it's their loss, not yours. To accept that getting rejected is part of life, and move on.
    Also have a support network does help a lot, even if it's only 1 or 2 people. Though if you don't have such network to help you out. I would start getting one before jumping in dating.

  • @HugeTTFan
    @HugeTTFan ปีที่แล้ว +21

    Falling in love is like giving that person a loaded gun and trusting them not to pull the trigger

    • @jimenatroncoso9124
      @jimenatroncoso9124 7 วันที่ผ่านมา

      I would say " to show yourself vulnerable " instead fall in love

  • @sitisyuhadaabdulhalim8508
    @sitisyuhadaabdulhalim8508 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    The first rejection hurts the most, I bawl and begged the other party. And then I learnt about it. So let's embrace it guys!

  • @mmrzw
    @mmrzw ปีที่แล้ว +89

    It's a good feeling when you realize these thoughts that you had was natural and the thoughts you had afterwards that rejection was actually healthy not denial. It was a good subject. I got kinda mocked by a stranger in my first days in a new city and a new environment few days ago. I was worried that I even cared about it. I feel more reliefed now thanks to you.

  • @sammyy1105
    @sammyy1105 ปีที่แล้ว +35

    when someone who has a high influence in your life rejects you, it really hurts. compared to a stranger with no to little interaction, it doesnt even sting and is viewed like a joke.

  • @atlas2296
    @atlas2296 ปีที่แล้ว +91

    For me, rejection or abandonment always makes me consider if there is something wrong with me. I often have times where I think "Am I rude? Am I argumentative? Am I annoying?" and I can never find anything I didn't already know. I think some people, especially in high school wherw I am at, are just too invested in "popularity" or being cool to make new friends with people that aren't popular

  • @memento5113
    @memento5113 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    Its better to face it and accept the truth. We cant hide our feelings nor supress them. I got rejected today but thats life. I been working on myself latly and that doesnt change. Stay strong my friends and let the light shine upon your loving heart ❤️

  • @DicerX
    @DicerX ปีที่แล้ว +40

    Finally, so many young male and female teens are straight-up going incel due to the unrealistic portrayal of love and ways of expressing it as seen on TV shows, movies and celebrity life. People, young and old, need to understand that love and acceptance are not something to unlock or achieve. It can be one-sided, or it can be mutual and spontaneous. In a world where we rationalise everything, this irrational connection confuses some, and the pain can change a person for the worst. Early education in this matter is key rather than avoiding this time bomb.

  • @jrtumale3662
    @jrtumale3662 ปีที่แล้ว +51

    Yes just what I needed before valentine's day.

    • @Gg-ij7li
      @Gg-ij7li ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Jesus loves you!
      Believe in His death and resurrection and repent of your sins and be saved!
      Remember that He died and rose up again for you to be in heaven with Him!
      Have an amazing day ❤️❤❤❤

    • @kimjongun6746
      @kimjongun6746 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @@Gg-ij7li So far I haven't committed any "sins", so could you explain me for what exactly should I repent for.....

    • @eee_eee
      @eee_eee ปีที่แล้ว

      @@kimjongun6746 - Kim jong eun

  • @ktothej1
    @ktothej1 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

    I just got rejected but it’s all in the name of the game. Don’t let it get you down, lads.

  • @sentiny
    @sentiny ปีที่แล้ว +8

    A new day and a new video that doesn't say anything new about rejection. I think this topic requires a much more honest and heartfelt approach. To understand it, there is a need of confessions and confrontations. No one (including me) understands it until they experience one.

  • @GothCookie
    @GothCookie ปีที่แล้ว +73

    This is a lesson many men need to learn these days. Rejection doesn't mean you're bad or worthless or unwanted.

    • @keyshawnscott12
      @keyshawnscott12 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      It does

    • @crazyfox9oh
      @crazyfox9oh ปีที่แล้ว +12

      It's a lesson for women too

    • @GothCookie
      @GothCookie ปีที่แล้ว +8

      @@crazyfox9oh it's a lesson for everyone.

    • @esperanza7948
      @esperanza7948 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Women too 💔

    • @Marlin0013
      @Marlin0013 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

      It does nobody cares about me why would anyone want me I am ugly

  • @lozannevanniekerk5489
    @lozannevanniekerk5489 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    I never had anyone tell me that they are proud of me or wants to support me or being kind to me reaching out trying to help me I have no one like that . That is what I actually need yet I have to keep supporting myself and God supports me as well

  • @123shortvideos9
    @123shortvideos9 ปีที่แล้ว +37

    Being rejected by my female best friend was the worst rejection ever. It hurts more than bleeding from a cut 😢

    • @Nestera-ys2nk
      @Nestera-ys2nk 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      How did you deal with it

    • @finnishlankans
      @finnishlankans 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Ngl I just got rejected it hurts AF 😞 I don't know wut to do she was my best friend

    • @123shortvideos9
      @123shortvideos9 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@Nestera-ys2nk sorry for the late response. To be real time will make things better, just don't be too close to her. I'm still friends with her but not like before

    • @123shortvideos9
      @123shortvideos9 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      @@finnishlankans just accept the reality my friend, there are more girls outside, stay away for a while from your friend and time will help you with the pain.

  • @theresabalick8963
    @theresabalick8963 ปีที่แล้ว +23

    Literally needed this this week thank you

  • @sanswiches
    @sanswiches 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    Saving this for when I ask my crush out, wish me luck…

  • @SheilaTheGrate
    @SheilaTheGrate ปีที่แล้ว +3

    This should be mandatory viewing. So much hurt could be preventable once someone has coping methods and the realization that they are not entitled to other peoples time and energy.

  • @guillermocubillas4168
    @guillermocubillas4168 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    Lately I had been struggling with looking for a job (a lot) even if this is not very descent.
    This video made me break in tears as I thought that nobody really would believe me how not getting the job you wanted over and over started to feel something just as close as being rejected and at some point I was falling in deep depression and with paranoia believing that there’s seriously something wrong with me and I don’t know what is it…
    It’s not that I’m happy or relieved that I’m not the only dealing with this, I wish nobody would deal with it actually. Somehow it does makes me feel not as bad as I was just moments ago, and also that I’m not the only one and if people did not give up then I will not

  • @centralrnrockets3500
    @centralrnrockets3500 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    I like how it's TED-ED essentially giving you social advice.

  • @EricHanefi
    @EricHanefi หลายเดือนก่อน

    Best advice I ever got: relax into the pain, allow it without trying to change it

  • @betcotime3276
    @betcotime3276 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    we love ourselves more than anyone but for some reason we value their opinion more than ours

  • @JamesMay-h5x
    @JamesMay-h5x หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Today she destroyed me. For weeks we spoke we everyday. She was so intelligent, caring and curious. It was such a delight. We spoke to each other when times were tough. I thought she was the one, but eventually she started dating again. And threw me completely out of the picture. Its like all that bonding was for nothing and i wasn't important anymore.
    Not only did i lose the love of my life, i lost a great friend😢

  • @anisa2273
    @anisa2273 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    rejection is even worse for those of us who are ADHDers as we deal with rejection sensitivity dysphoria...

    • @jordanpatton3622
      @jordanpatton3622 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I have ADHD too, I’m rejection sensitive as well 😅

    • @q-oo6zh
      @q-oo6zh 13 วันที่ผ่านมา

      Wdym rejection sensitivity

  • @evindrews
    @evindrews ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I think this is a good video on an endless topic that can have various implications. It shows just how earth shattering it probably is to have those close to you reject you, and why it's a good idea to not lean 100% on any one person, in the case you're rejected. (family, friend, or otherwise) It also shows just how destabilizing it is for people who poor family dynamics, causing attachment issues.

  • @cajaschmidt
    @cajaschmidt ปีที่แล้ว +6

    this video is so good! im overwhelmed by these animations and how good they bring the message.

  • @on.fam5
    @on.fam5 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    I got rejected. After 2 years of knowing her. It definitely hurts… There’s nothing more than I want to do then cry my heart out, but even more than that I just want her to be happy, even if it couldn’t be me.
    Why am i typing this out on the internet? maybe i just wish to be heard honestly.

  • @joelkirkpatrick5688
    @joelkirkpatrick5688 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    To the person out there that may feel like you are being rejected, you're not being rejected. It's just that he/she cares for you immensely especially if they care to walk/talk to you and considered going out with/having plans with you. That person is just as afraid as you are and might not be telling you everything about themselves in fear that you might reject them due to their circumstances or other aspects of themselves. I was in this situation a little while back and I didn't say much because I was afraid she would push me away and I didn't want her to know that I still living with my parents, which is embarrassing to say. I really did care about her and wanted to go out, as I did ask, and she said yes. It's just that I couldn't say anything else or make things move forward more due to her finding out that I was still with my parents. It hit me like a bullet when I felt pushed away, but I knew this might happen. I just wanted to stay with her for as long as I could cause it made me incredibly happy to be near her. I'm still dealing with the pain and sting that the feeling of not being near her and feeling like she thinks I didn't care at all, today. I just want her to know that I cared more than I could say, and she meant so much to me. I haven't talked to her for 7 months or so and she said she was getting a new job, so it might be too late to see her again. Now I have to deal with all this pain and sting because I still feel attached to her and care for her.

  • @SearchOfSelf
    @SearchOfSelf ปีที่แล้ว +14

    It's hard to admit it but being refused isn't the end of the world. Even if it passes through cutting the ties, it's alright if that brings you the best option. Respect and benefit should be basis of any relationship and if it's not possible then there's no harm to move on.

  • @Dr-zd9eu
    @Dr-zd9eu ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I love this channel. You guys really care about your viewers and it shows 💚

  • @mdaaaa1211
    @mdaaaa1211 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    People have different sensitivity leaves to rejection due to childhood trauma. Second, you can tell someone who has been rejected their whole life to deal with it.

  • @devanshkaushik8555
    @devanshkaushik8555 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    the line 3:20 is so true..we sometimes misinterpret the neutral reactions of others as rejection..and this really gave the way to me..that what possibly i have to ask myself the very next time..thank u, u r my one of fav channel..

    • @esperanza7948
      @esperanza7948 ปีที่แล้ว

      I don’t get it could you please explain?

  • @geri472
    @geri472 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I like this! "There's nothing wrong with you"

  • @TheDJboi2011
    @TheDJboi2011 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I just got rejected from a job. Made me go to this video, to cope.

  • @robert17282
    @robert17282 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    This actually helped a lot and made me realize if I do the rejecting I can't be hurt

  • @gabiwainaina396
    @gabiwainaina396 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    Rejection from one of your parent's, worst pain ever. They absolutely want nothing to do with you😭

  • @lolacat4122
    @lolacat4122 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    these videos save my day

  • @karengomez3143
    @karengomez3143 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I was exactly needing this ❤ I don’t have a good relationship with my father and that prevents me from having a relationship with any of my relatives, each time I kinda accept to join the expect from me to say that I’m wrong and if not then they try to hit my self esteem, I guess I should try to build a stronger relationship with the ones already accept me, TY TED-Ed ❤

  • @justapersonscrollingby753
    @justapersonscrollingby753 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    do remember that when rejecting someone, not only you feel pain, but it can be quite hard for the other party to reject you too

  • @craigmerkey8518
    @craigmerkey8518 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Great video, amazing animations. This illustrates the harm of validation seeking!

  • @amantodescienco693
    @amantodescienco693 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    This is actually a good video to talk about. Well, in my personal experience, I do feel those but I am learning to easily quench them and just claim that this is my world. I can do whatever I want.

  • @dianebaker518
    @dianebaker518 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I just appreciate how you are real with people you are so right. Live it people need to accept themselves. Love it keep letting ppl. Their flaws Noone else does. I love your videos. Keep being real l. Your different and you talk wisdom. Ppl need to hear your wisdom. Keep it real. Alot of people love you.

  • @mirroredchaos
    @mirroredchaos ปีที่แล้ว

    I never thought there would be a day were someone makes a video of my whole life, tnx ted ed.

  • @kirbymarchbarcena
    @kirbymarchbarcena ปีที่แล้ว +1

    It is important that kids learn to deal with loss, defeats, and rejections. What the elders show, the kids will know.

  • @skybluskyblueify
    @skybluskyblueify ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Parents or caregivers need to teach how to handle it early in a child's life. Sadly some parents reject their own child and attempt to hurt them one way or another while also not teaching them to handle it. In some societies certain populations need this skill more than others but everyone could do to learn this for the good of society in general.

  • @princessstewart8196
    @princessstewart8196 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    The animation for this video is so cute :) and a helpful guide to navigating personal relationships

  • @hoangharley4940
    @hoangharley4940 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I can deal with the rejection, but the pain... The pain is what I'm still struggling to deal with.

    • @esperanza7948
      @esperanza7948 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Me right now 💔 the pain OMG i can’t I’m depressed now

  • @freespiritpearl89
    @freespiritpearl89 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    The thumb nail makes me want to cry.

  • @normanryan9145
    @normanryan9145 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I needed to hear this. Thank you TedEd

  • @strange_and_magnificent
    @strange_and_magnificent ปีที่แล้ว +34

    I've been rejected so many times that I no longer feel the pain of it.

    • @TamalPlays
      @TamalPlays ปีที่แล้ว +2

      what is pain?

    • @Luffy_wastaken
      @Luffy_wastaken ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @Golas Pain isn't real

    • @Spy_boys
      @Spy_boys ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Hahahaha! You deserved it for being a mistake that no one will ever love.🤣😭😴👎👎😂

  • @gymrachel
    @gymrachel หลายเดือนก่อน

    I don't understand how someone can go from being sweet & loving to going cold & distant. Feeling broken.

  • @fanny6889
    @fanny6889 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    It’s somehow helpful advice for giving the steps to consider the relationship to others who rejected me. Thank you !

  • @santoshsam333
    @santoshsam333 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    whenever someones mean to me I imagine these ted ed narrations consoling me.

  • @Christ-Is-My-Life
    @Christ-Is-My-Life 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    Just got officially rejected by my crush. He’s talking to a new girl now and I will probably be crying in bed tonight, I’ve liked him for almost and year and a half

    • @thorpe1178
      @thorpe1178 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      So you've like for him for over a year? Ouch! That's gonna hurt real bad, be prepared, it's gonna be very painful I'm very familiar with that

    • @Christ-Is-My-Life
      @Christ-Is-My-Life 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@thorpe1178 yeah, after being rejected I don’t even know if I’m still totally in love with him still because I haven’t seen him in person after he texted me that, so idk

  • @JimCincinnati
    @JimCincinnati 9 หลายเดือนก่อน

    The animation on this is masterful. It improved the message. Well done!

  • @Charles__5268
    @Charles__5268 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Understanding the loss of funds and the pathway to recovery.

  • @ckong25
    @ckong25 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    When someone rejects you romantically, say, “Thank you for giving me the opportunity to find someone better than you.” Put yourself first.

  • @sangwookkim8906
    @sangwookkim8906 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    always try best effort to people I think precious to me. don't judge myself by others perspectives.

  • @sagnikghosh25
    @sagnikghosh25 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Amazing analysis

  • @FirstPrinciple_
    @FirstPrinciple_ ปีที่แล้ว +24

    Getting rejected is way better than not trying at all. The odds of success increase in the subsequent attempt(s) as you know why you got rejected in the first place. You miss 100% of the shots you don't take.

    • @romainb5684
      @romainb5684 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Yeah and 100% of winners have tried

  • @hodat_
    @hodat_ ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I absolutely love this new self-help ish series from TED-Ed!!! Hope to see some more along with the scientific educational videos!

  • @kiiyooo4337
    @kiiyooo4337 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    This video relieved me so much i could have confidence

  • @w0nderw0man106
    @w0nderw0man106 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    This was so helpful. Thank you

  • @user-ph5pd3nh4w
    @user-ph5pd3nh4w 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Incredibly thankful for this one. Have such a blessed week :)

  • @henryhell1304
    @henryhell1304 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Never knew i would have to search up this

  • @Carol___76e3
    @Carol___76e3 28 วันที่ผ่านมา

    The entertaining world of important refund info

  • @MuhammadAli-bn9nu
    @MuhammadAli-bn9nu ปีที่แล้ว +16

    That's why I'm always prefer loneliness to thinking about rejection anymore, contacting with people is just causing an endless problems along the lines maybe there is a natural needing to live in society but keeping a little contact with a lot of caution and with clear distance between you and them is helping, finally loneliness is not cool but it's way better than dealing with people

  • @new-ot8ts
    @new-ot8ts ปีที่แล้ว +1

    とても心が楽になりました

  • @Mi-be1os
    @Mi-be1os ปีที่แล้ว +12

    Having abusive parents, going to art school and working as a model have all taught me how harsh rejection can be. It's incredibly difficult sometimes but once you stop deriving your self worth from the affirmation of other people it actually becomes a lot easier to deal with. Just know your own worth and keep believing in yourself and you will be able to get over it! :)

  • @theironsmith1
    @theironsmith1 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Been at a point when a lot of people habe rejected me. Relationships, Jobs, Relatives, Close Friends, Dating, you name it

  • @ayeshajaved4583
    @ayeshajaved4583 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Thank you Team Ted-Ed ♥ for adding so much value to my life♥

  • @sushilskolia
    @sushilskolia ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Videos are always relatable to daily life

  • @makeuphacks7368
    @makeuphacks7368 24 วันที่ผ่านมา

    The comment section>>>>>>>>>> Video itself. Daammnnn!!!

  • @ilaybit10
    @ilaybit10 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    This video has been uploaded just in time for me

  • @mann1368
    @mann1368 ปีที่แล้ว

    One Of The Best Explanation And Depiction Of One of most important Aspect of a human's social life is shown By TEDEd in this video , Thank You very Much to the entire team for the work, research and hard work you guys put to the videos.

  • @RORO-xr7si
    @RORO-xr7si 5 วันที่ผ่านมา

    The person we want may not want us back. Learning to move on instead of repeating unsuccessful attempts is best.

  • @MrDilshadx7
    @MrDilshadx7 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I can't express in words how to help me this video 🙏