This guy i've known for several years finally asked me out, and I accepted. He confessed he was transgendered, and that he was born a girl. I don't think any differently of him, and I think he's a really beautiful soul, and I have you to thank for opening my mind to it. I mean, I've never been transphobic, but I never thought I could personally date a trans guy. Life is so much better now because I have this special guy in my life, and he's no different than any guy who was born a male :)
I do the same thing :) I just try to be true to myself all the time, and if that raises questions or whatever I address them honestly. If people know it's no big deal, as opposed to a whispered secret between friends, they don't tend to treat me differently.
Exactly, disclosing is not necessary, an obligation or a way to filter in close friends. Many people live stealth without hiding. For many transition unveils to the world what they always knew themselves to be. For some that means disclosure both even after transition, for others it ends at the point their gender feels fully acknowledged. For others it's a small portion of their bodied and/or emotional history that those close to them will know of...it's really different for everyone.
I struggle with this as well at times. On one hand, I love that people I just meet see me as male and only male. I feel truly comfortable in social settings for the first time in my life. On the other hand, I believe in authenticity. It's hard to be totally authentic to people if they don't know about a huge part of your identity. Catch-22 I suppose. I don't disclose unless it's necessary, it comes up or occasionally if I feel my experiences can add to a situation or conversation.
I just saw you walking down the street or anything. Your video is gr8 and I think its awesome you want to be a sort of spokesperson for the Trans-Community! Best of wishes :)
I actually feel this way so much right now. At my school i identify as male but am in a partial transition, yet im scared of what would happen if my friends i met at school would find out.
MAAAAANNN!!!! i feel exactly the same way. i feel like maybe i should tell and then im like nah i dont have to and then im like maybe i should tell and then..... you get the drift... its really confusing!!
I don't think you're hiding. The best advice I can give you is the advice that someone gave me. You don't need to label yourself to everyone just be yourself. I've kinda adapted a policy of telling those who ask, but then again I'm in a different situation because I'm not living stealth. I wish you the best!
I completely understand what you're saying. I'm stealth and I have a bunch of close friends who don't know I'm trans. People don't need to know about your past though. When you meet new people, you don't feel the need to tell them that, I dunno, as a kid you used to have different coloured hair or whatever. So why tell them that you used to look different in any other way? You're still the same person.
I have to agree with ADDBoy010. You DO NOT need to tell the world you're Trans! Just be YOU! You'll know when, where and who you want to tell. I'm Gay, and I let people meet me and form there own opinions. If I wish to tell them my sexuality, then fine. If not...the world does not end, volcanoes don't erupt and everything is cool. Don't stress or overthink things. You're an attractive guy who has SO MUCH going for himself, and you do have a lot of us rooting for you and we love ya so much! :)
hey Skyler, I totally know where you're coming from. I'm pretty much in the same situation! I know a bunch of people here know, but then they've been so awesome about it, that I worry that they don't actually know! You don't owe it really to anyone to share anything that you don't feel comfortable sharing with them. And if you do end up telling people, I think they should be able to understand why you might not come out and say it first thing. Anyways, thanks for making this video!
u'll eventually find a way of telling people who you think need to know without it seeming awkward. It just takes time to feel natural. It used to be hard to tell coworkers & the like that I am gay. Why do they need to know? Now I can bring it up in conversation so it doesn't surprise anyone & I can be really open about it & open to any questions they may have about it @ the same time. U have less opportunity 2 practice "coming out" (cuz u pass so well) but it'll be more natural the more u try
I think in life with every situation is different with different people (sometimes you need to follow your heart) At the end of the day you are you...born male with biological female body...now ur body more suits you. At some point you should be able to just live as you are, and not be ur past. =) good luck
HI, Sky^^ I really like your videos! You are such a great guy^///////////^ Im very curious about the key you are wearing on your neck all the time. Is it has some special meaning for you? Or its just precious for you? I know its stupid of me to ask such questions, but I really want to know!!!
I just started T 2 weeks ago and when it comes to being stealth to people I'm around now that don't know, I feel like I'm hiding something from them too, it does bother me some, as in a way I feel like I'm lying about being a male (born with male genitals) I'm female to male starting my transitioning and I consider myself male, but yet I feel like I'm hiding my birth sex
You are so awesome!!! But don't your friends watch your videos? because if they did, they would know.... little bit confusing... btw did you tell them by now?
"FINDING OUT".... after a time that should never be an issue for you. Once you "are"... and should anyone then bring that up... just brush if off by saying that is "old news"... and then move on.
You look like..the dude from ratatouille! Cx His names Remy I think! I'm sorry someone had to say it! :3 But you're really cute and I really admire your transition, You inspire me a lot!
you shouldn't have to care about having to tell anyone. Personal life is personal life just because someone's your friend doesn't mean they should feel entitled to know your medical history unless you feel like telling them for whatever reason. If a good friend of mine used to have like a mole on their hand I wouldn't expect them to tell me but if they did I'd be like ok cool for letting me into that BUT PRIVATE IS PRIVATE STUFFAND YOUR A TEMPLE
Hey Long time follower first time commenter, my opinion is i think you should come out as what you truely are and people that are assholes will be shown and you will have true friends who don't care! I did this because i'm bisexual and did get a lot of stick....See you next week xx
my comment is too long so im gonna have to divide it into 2 comments, sorry. i think i know exactly how you feel. sometimes i have these moments when i'm like really close with my best friends or my parents, having fun or just talking, and it feels so right, but then i remind myself that theres still something im hiding from them and it kind of feels like i'm cheating somehow. and i wonder if it would change something (everything?) if i told them that i was trans. -->
ok dude i know this is completely beside the point haha but at like 2:35 i heard your cell vibrate in the video. and i have the same phone cuz i know that vibration for a text. it's so fucking annoying! lol samsung impression right? :P
--> on the other hand, being transgender we're already deprived of something when it comes to our masculinity and we should be able to make the most of it. still, in my opinion, if going stealth makes you feel bad in some way, you should consider coming out. you're a great person Sky and people will see that no matter what your sex chromosomes are.
i've had this same question in my mind as well and after thinking about it i realized that it's more of me trying to feel better about my insecurities, like I am not completely sold that i am male... the terminology says you are a transsexual male. transgender is a term for gender expression, not for the change of sex basically you aren't transgender, cuz if you were you'd be dressing and acting feminine lol make any sense? (i'm taking queer studies and its really making me think)
Wow that seems like a tough situation & decision to make. In my opinion you should bring the subject up to your close friends at school & say "what if you were friends with a transgender person for a while, but you had no idea they were and you found out?" then see how they react to it.
Hey man, I don't know about the "I'm not fully male thing".. Like I don't know how you meant to say it or whatever, but you are fully male. Any way, great video. I believe a lot of people can seriously relate to this.
I had no idea you were born female. Wow, great video. I think if they are your true friends they won't care. I think they may think you are hiding it from them even if you aren't. That's a difficult situation. I hope it works out for you.
If it doesn't come up one way or another... Why would you tell them? You don't tell them, oh, that you stole a pack of cigarettes, or that your first girlfriend was an addict, or that you had this really great holiday in Texas, right? Not unless the topic calls for it. I don't think it's important for anyone to know that you were born female for regular daily socialising.
I worry for my brother's safety, I don't want people to judge/harass/discriminate against him because he was born female. Of coarse people who are closest to him should know but I don't think that he has to come out to the general public . If you were born with a different nose/hair color/webbed toes or fingers would you tell everyone?!?! For me it is a safety thing ...
Sky, I understand what you're saying and I respect that, but I personally don't see an obligation to announce yourself to anyone unless you get really close to them. Just my opinion. As far as how you appear, I can tell you as a gay man I find you quite attractive and I don't detect anything feminine about you. It's easy for me to say but I recommend that you don't get so hung up about what people know or don't know. I'm not out but if anyone asks me if I'm gay I tell them the truth.
Sky: You are male! You probably don't routinely tell most people whether you ever had chickenpox or measles. You don't have an obligation to tell them about other medical history. Lloyd
i think that because your body was born female and has transitioned into male (or into being perceived as male) does not change the fact that on the inside you have always been as much a man as any average guy. you are currently perceived as what you are on the inside, the body you were born with isn't important to people you meet now because it is not you.
i think it has to do with gaydar. lol if your gay, you know. like when i saw your picture in related videos, it was immediate to me. if they cant figure it out, then they dont need to know. have them get to know you and if they find out and dont respect it they arent worth it, sweety.
yes be ur self don't im the same allot girls think im cute and i love it baby anyone can just my page too but vids sucks because i need new webcam but i will get one soon but man u look good im happy for u got pretty girl that loves u for u and that great
transgender may be part of who you are, but it is not who you are entirely. if you are fully transitioned, i don't see any reason to tell anyone that you were once female... unless you feel like they should know. if they treat you differently because of it then they don't need to be in your life :-)
WHOAA!! i totally thought you were born a guy all the way then im like wait this dude use to be a chick? no way! so um yea.. haha not much to say :p good job on the video! :]
![january thirteenth + olga :]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/9Uxtujq5PUo/mqdefault.jpg)
@SuperKarinaG my thing about that is i'm not sure its necessary. :/
@KaWeezyy91 yep, and they have. i worry about it sometimes..
This guy i've known for several years finally asked me out, and I accepted. He confessed he was transgendered, and that he was born a girl. I don't think any differently of him, and I think he's a really beautiful soul, and I have you to thank for opening my mind to it. I mean, I've never been transphobic, but I never thought I could personally date a trans guy. Life is so much better now because I have this special guy in my life, and he's no different than any guy who was born a male :)
I do the same thing :) I just try to be true to myself all the time, and if that raises questions or whatever I address them honestly. If people know it's no big deal, as opposed to a whispered secret between friends, they don't tend to treat me differently.
Exactly, disclosing is not necessary, an obligation or a way to filter in close friends. Many people live stealth without hiding. For many transition unveils to the world what they always knew themselves to be. For some that means disclosure both even after transition, for others it ends at the point their gender feels fully acknowledged. For others it's a small portion of their bodied and/or emotional history that those close to them will know of...it's really different for everyone.
thanks for making this.
i'm liking these topical videos.
I struggle with this as well at times. On one hand, I love that people I just meet see me as male and only male. I feel truly comfortable in social settings for the first time in my life. On the other hand, I believe in authenticity. It's hard to be totally authentic to people if they don't know about a huge part of your identity.
Catch-22 I suppose. I don't disclose unless it's necessary, it comes up or occasionally if I feel my experiences can add to a situation or conversation.
I just saw you walking down the street or anything. Your video is gr8 and I think its awesome you want to be a sort of spokesperson for the Trans-Community! Best of wishes :)
I actually feel this way so much right now. At my school i identify as male but am in a partial transition, yet im scared of what would happen if my friends i met at school would find out.
You look sooo prettyyy
MAAAAANNN!!!! i feel exactly the same way. i feel like maybe i should tell and then im like nah i dont have to and then im like maybe i should tell and then..... you get the drift... its really confusing!!
I don't think you're hiding. The best advice I can give you is the advice that someone gave me. You don't need to label yourself to everyone just be yourself. I've kinda adapted a policy of telling those who ask, but then again I'm in a different situation because I'm not living stealth. I wish you the best!
You have to be proud of who you are. You are perfect! (:
I completely understand what you're saying. I'm stealth and I have a bunch of close friends who don't know I'm trans.
People don't need to know about your past though. When you meet new people, you don't feel the need to tell them that, I dunno, as a kid you used to have different coloured hair or whatever. So why tell them that you used to look different in any other way? You're still the same person.
I have to agree with ADDBoy010. You DO NOT need to tell the world you're Trans! Just be YOU! You'll know when, where and who you want to tell. I'm Gay, and I let people meet me and form there own opinions. If I wish to tell them my sexuality, then fine. If not...the world does not end, volcanoes don't erupt and everything is cool. Don't stress or overthink things. You're an attractive guy who has SO MUCH going for himself, and you do have a lot of us rooting for you and we love ya so much! :)
hey Skyler,
I totally know where you're coming from. I'm pretty much in the same situation! I know a bunch of people here know, but then they've been so awesome about it, that I worry that they don't actually know!
You don't owe it really to anyone to share anything that you don't feel comfortable sharing with them. And if you do end up telling people, I think they should be able to understand why you might not come out and say it first thing.
Anyways, thanks for making this video!
u'll eventually find a way of telling people who you think need to know without it seeming awkward. It just takes time to feel natural. It used to be hard to tell coworkers & the like that I am gay. Why do they need to know? Now I can bring it up in conversation so it doesn't surprise anyone & I can be really open about it & open to any questions they may have about it @ the same time. U have less opportunity 2 practice "coming out" (cuz u pass so well) but it'll be more natural the more u try
I think in life with every situation is different with different people (sometimes you need to follow your heart) At the end of the day you are you...born male with biological female body...now ur body more suits you. At some point you should be able to just live as you are, and not be ur past. =) good luck
HI, Sky^^
I really like your videos! You are such a great guy^///////////^
Im very curious about the key you are wearing on your neck all the time.
Is it has some special meaning for you? Or its just precious for you?
I know its stupid of me to ask such questions, but I really want to know!!!
It might sound shallow, but your voice is actually pretty awesome! ^^
I just started T 2 weeks ago and when it comes to being stealth to people I'm around now that don't know, I feel like I'm hiding something from them too, it does bother me some, as in a way I feel like I'm lying about being a male (born with male genitals) I'm female to male starting my transitioning and I consider myself male, but yet I feel like I'm hiding my birth sex
You are so awesome!!! But don't your friends watch your videos? because if they did, they would know.... little bit confusing...
btw did you tell them by now?
"FINDING OUT".... after a time that should never be an issue for you. Once you
"are"... and should anyone then bring that up... just brush if off by saying that is
"old news"... and then move on.
You look like..the dude from ratatouille! Cx His names Remy I think! I'm sorry someone had to say it! :3 But you're really cute and I really admire your transition, You inspire me a lot!
you shouldn't have to care about having to tell anyone. Personal life is personal life just because someone's your friend doesn't mean they should feel entitled to know your medical history unless you feel like telling them for whatever reason. If a good friend of mine used to have like a mole on their hand I wouldn't expect them to tell me but if they did I'd be like ok cool for letting me into that BUT PRIVATE IS PRIVATE STUFFAND YOUR A TEMPLE
I'm a straight girl, and holy shit, you are so freaking cute! I would totally go for you. Skin is skin.
Hey Long time follower first time commenter, my opinion is i think you should come out as what you truely are and people that are assholes will be shown and you will have true friends who don't care! I did this because i'm bisexual and did get a lot of stick....See you next week xx
my comment is too long so im gonna have to divide it into 2 comments, sorry. i think i know exactly how you feel. sometimes i have these moments when i'm like really close with my best friends or my parents, having fun or just talking, and it feels so right, but then i remind myself that theres still something im hiding from them and it kind of feels like i'm cheating somehow. and i wonder if it would change something (everything?) if i told them that i was trans. -->
ok dude i know this is completely beside the point haha
but at like 2:35 i heard your cell vibrate in the video. and i have the same phone cuz i know that vibration for a text. it's so fucking annoying! lol samsung impression right? :P
--> on the other hand, being transgender we're already deprived of something when it comes to our masculinity and we should be able to make the most of it. still, in my opinion, if going stealth makes you feel bad in some way, you should consider coming out. you're a great person Sky and people will see that no matter what your sex chromosomes are.
i've had this same question in my mind as well and after thinking about it i realized that it's more of me trying to feel better about my insecurities, like I am not completely sold that i am male... the terminology says you are a transsexual male. transgender is a term for gender expression, not for the change of sex basically you aren't transgender, cuz if you were you'd be dressing and acting feminine lol make any sense? (i'm taking queer studies and its really making me think)
just b stealth don't worry about the past..... its your past, let it b. no one needs to know your past
Wow that seems like a tough situation & decision to make.
In my opinion you should bring the subject up to your close friends at school & say "what if you were friends with a transgender person for a while, but you had no idea they were and you found out?" then see how they react to it.
you look so much like Christofer Drew from Nevershoutnever
Hey man, I don't know about the "I'm not fully male thing".. Like I don't know how you meant to say it or whatever, but you are fully male. Any way, great video. I believe a lot of people can seriously relate to this.
I had no idea you were born female.
Wow, great video.
I think if they are your true friends they won't care. I think they may think you are hiding it from them even if you aren't. That's a difficult situation. I hope it works out for you.
u look good with dark hair
i cant tell... your really frickin cute though!! :)
If it doesn't come up one way or another... Why would you tell them? You don't tell them, oh, that you stole a pack of cigarettes, or that your first girlfriend was an addict, or that you had this really great holiday in Texas, right? Not unless the topic calls for it. I don't think it's important for anyone to know that you were born female for regular daily socialising.
I worry for my brother's safety, I don't want people to judge/harass/discriminate against him because he was born female. Of coarse people who are closest to him should know but I don't think that he has to come out to the general public . If you were born with a different nose/hair color/webbed toes or fingers would you tell everyone?!?! For me it is a safety thing ...
you look amazing
Too much information is one thing, but I don't believe in too much honesty. No need to wear a sign on your chest, share at your own discretion.
Sky, I understand what you're saying and I respect that, but I personally don't see an obligation to announce yourself to anyone unless you get really close to them. Just my opinion. As far as how you appear, I can tell you as a gay man I find you quite attractive and I don't detect anything feminine about you. It's easy for me to say but I recommend that you don't get so hung up about what people know or don't know. I'm not out but if anyone asks me if I'm gay I tell them the truth.
Sky:
You are male! You probably don't routinely tell most people whether you ever had chickenpox or measles. You don't have an obligation to tell them about other medical history.
Lloyd
i think that because your body was born female and has transitioned into male (or into being perceived as male) does not change the fact that on the inside you have always been as much a man as any average guy. you are currently perceived as what you are on the inside, the body you were born with isn't important to people you meet now because it is not you.
sorry i repeated myself on here lol i just got my youtube up and going
i think it has to do with gaydar. lol if your gay, you know. like when i saw your picture in related videos, it was immediate to me. if they cant figure it out, then they dont need to know. have them get to know you and if they find out and dont respect it they arent worth it, sweety.
I thought you were a guy I would never know if you walked past me on the street.
nah you are not hiding!!
yes be ur self don't im the same allot girls think im cute and i love it baby anyone can just my page too but vids sucks because i need new webcam but i will get one soon but man u look good im happy for u got pretty girl that loves u for u and that great
i know how u im transgender i want to take hormones and get a breast reduction
transgender may be part of who you are, but it is not who you are entirely. if you are fully transitioned, i don't see any reason to tell anyone that you were once female... unless you feel like they should know. if they treat you differently because of it then they don't need to be in your life :-)
were you ganna cry 5:31 :'0 ?...don't :' (
WHOAA!! i totally thought you were born a guy all the way then im like wait this dude use to be a chick? no way! so um yea.. haha not much to say :p good job on the video! :]
yes yes he dose
Well I'm a gay guy and when I first saw you I swore you were a guy and idc if you were a girl I'd still date you :D
@lobear539 i agree (Y)
it seems that he is not a girl actually.
si te doi :) haha ojala hablaras espaniol
i wish u could speak spanish
I was wondering if you were gay... lol. I mean I know your not since your with a girl but that is a cool story.
Woah...I didn't even kno ou used to e a girls...your voice is do low!
ur pretty much a guy since i'm attracted to you and i'm straight btw lol
@FistofAmerica
hypocrite!!
ur just like me i want to get hormones and get my breast remove im just the same as u lol