That pretty much describes about 75% of the women out there. The other 25% are high quality enough that they attracted a man they consider worthy and an "alpha".
Almost all party girls have an incurable STI of some kind, so definitely stay away. There's a reason twice as many women have genital herpes than men, never mind cold sores as far as the eye can see. A party girl's mattress has been ridden harder than a '98 Corolla.
My biggest red flag is a woman that's constantly on social media. Social media isn't a bad thing, but when your life revolves around it, yeah, that's not good. I enjoy your videos Courtney! Keep up the good work!
“Girl with no friends” is also a red flag for women who want to be their friend. Whenever a girl says things like “I don’t have girlfriends because girls are drama” I know immediately that that girl is the drama. I steer clear of girls like that.
Those same girls also almost always have mostly if not nothing but guys as friends. She keeps these guys around as affirmation as these men almost always Wana be with that girl or to hook up with that girl. And you aren't allowed to have any friends who are girls....because SHE "knows" how girls are... yet dismisses your concerns about all guy friends as if it's "different" lol
lol yupppppp when a friend I had said "oh wow ur the only girl friend I have cuz your bi, so ur less drama, girls are usually so over into it--they don't get it" lol.........I become a bit uncomfortable. for one thing I don't like people bringing up what they think my sexuality is, but also..... girl friends are great, they are not dramatic they are usually more openly talking about relationship issues, and talk through solutions empathetically ... eventually this friend exploded and left my life but.... I should have known LOL. When someone says "they don't like drama" usually........ they bring drama.
I don't get why anyone good in there heart would have a lot of friends. I don't get that...i mean a good person can't make a lot of friends because there just isn't that many good people. So good people steer clear of not so good people. You can't be peer pressured if you avoid the people that would put you in that situation.
That's your opinion. But what if she's right and throughout her experiences she's had friends who are drama queens, because that's a definite possibility and there are more girls like that than there are drama free and friendless girls. Me personally, I'd much rather be with a drama free than drama queen.
The "Girl with no girlfriends" is also the prime offender of the homie hop. Because she has no social circle of her own, she will adopt yours. So when you break up, your homebois become her dating pool.
Remember everyone: She doesn't control you, you don't control her. She doesn't manipulate you, you don't manipulate her. Life is easier if you're good partners with someone. Make sure you choose a good partner in life as they would expect you to be a good partner as well.
@JewTube WorldOrder I 100% agree that everyone, man or woman should just focus on themselves and not worry about dating and that life is better that way, but I wouldn’t say women are “damaged goods.” Some of them are emotional and have had a rough time with a lot of things, and some of them can be dramatic, (hell, I know a lot of grown ass men that act that way too), but everyone’s out here tryina survive and just be respected. That doesn’t make the majority of women damaged or “goods.”
I once had a goth girlfriend , and she was quite the psycho . Between the bloodletting and the random tases , she left me quite traumatized. I still miss her sometimes.
Your list reminds me of the list in the book "How to Love". Based on that, I'd add: 1. The victim (AKA vulnerable or covert narcissist)--this is the #1 most likely thing you need to avoid 2. Other narcissists, sociopaths, psychopaths, mean girls (they enjoy other people's pain), hateful girls (their lives are never-ending rants), etc. 3. The girl who suffers from bipolar disorder or an excess of depression 4. Girls who suffer from borderline personality disorder 5. Hard-core addicts 6. Girls who have too much trauma to be able to form a stable, long-lasting bond (like Homer Simpson's mom or Jenny from Forrest Gump)
I can relate. I was married to a covert Narcissist with Bipolar & depression. Now divorced from her 10 years, and looking back, I truly feel I lost 20 years of my life with her. Don't walk but RUN from narcissistic women with mental issues!!!
@@gc4644 I agree, but sometimes, we don't know who we are married to until we are divorced. I can relate and I also feel I lost too many years on this type of woman. It is just so hard to know because people can fool you and tell what you want to hear, but you have to be careful.
@mattirealm I call it the Cinderella mask, women are VERY good at hiding their crazy and inner bitch, they can even do it for years if/when necessary. They only drop the mask once they know all their options are gone or when there is close to 100% probability that they will win Alimony and/or Child Support..
Thanks for adding to the list. Two of my personal most important criteria are: a)) does she communicate well. This includes her speaking up if something isn't quite working for her or if she's slightly annoyed or if she wants a slight adjustment to the relationship. If she literally only says positive things and zero negative things / "could we change this slightly" / "this annoyed me slightly" things for say a month, then she's probably not communicating her annoyances and needs, which means those annoyances will grow and that may eventually nuke the relationship or at least lead to an unnecessarily large fight. b) is she actually working on herself on an emotional / mental (and if you're into that, spiritual) level, including at times when that's not strictly necessary. I think everyone has some old psychological pain or bad habits or whatever and can use this, even if it's only something like journaling or her trying to understand perspectives she doesn't agree with or something.
Wow I've dated girls that have had one these traits a couple of times but the last relationship I just got out of she was like four of them. Hard to really analyze red flags until you take a step back, and I found out the hard way. She was Insecure, materialistic and only cared about vanity, had no girlfriends and a horrible relationship with her family, and was an attention addict and started looking to other men during the end of things. She was drop-dead gorgeous (looked like Audrey Hepburn), I was so enthralled with her beauty and the things I thought were "good" that I stayed in that relationship. Most painful seven months of my life. Then found out she was the rebound seeker and moved in with a guy a week after meeting him for a place to stay. Crazy. Very insightful, thank you for the video Courtney. Stay strong gents!
Men need to become full stack men before they go out into the dating field. Full stack meaning you actually are on your purpose in life and moving forward. If you want a high value women you need to become a high value man! You attract what you are.
Too many men suddenly proclaim themselves "High Value" and worthy of High Value Women, when just yesterday they were not. Just because you believe that you are High Value, doesn't mean others do. If you do not have the resources and resume/cv to back up that confidence -- you're just arrogant and full of yourself.
Self actualization is so rare I have not seen a person yet who has achieved that goal. Most people are just average and lofty goals are not even in there radar.
Let's not forget the indifferent one. The one that she is constantly busy, dont have time for you, she expects you to be the one that talks to her first but she never does the same for you and when you dont contact her she gets annoyed. She always keep you waiting and she never keep her word, she can promise you to be better at something and she never does, but when you make a promise and you dont fulfill it then she gets angry at you. These are the ones that makes you say "it's better to be alone than being with bad company".
I literally just broke up with a girl like that. She always gets mad at me whenever I want attention from her and never texted me first. Plus I noticed she was getting friendly with this Ian guy. sounds pretty sus to me
@@MrPapi235 I disagree, I'm engaged to a great woman, she may not be perfect, but she's perfect for me, and that's what counts at.the end of the day. We've been together 7 years and still aren't bored of each other
*The type that constantly seeks drama or thrives on attention is a huge red flag. It’s not just about avoiding toxic traits; it’s about investing in a relationship that adds value to your life!*
Excellent video! I would also add the Damsel in Distress type. This is someone who always has a problem that she can't fix herself, and is constantly looking for someone to solve her puzzles. Problem is: her problems never seem to get solved. Another type I would avoid, is the gambler. I grew up in Las Vegas, and trust me, if a woman is intrigued by casinos and slot machines, run for your life. This one will also typically be the Damsel in Distress type, which is a symptom of a deeper problem. I am 70 now, and very fortunate that I married the right girl at a very young age. (49 years together now) I have spent a lifetime observing people, and have seen em come and go. Often while never learning the obvious lesson(s) I could write a book. Way to go, Courtney. I hope you have a lot of success with your channel.
I have this habit of watching men's lifestyle improvement videos every night before bed and Courtney dropping 8 videos this week has been really helpful, probably one of the best things that happened this week. Cheers to you Courtney for helping us.
I've dated a girl that fits into more than one of these categories and it was one of the most toxic relationships I've ever had. Suggesting walking away and personal growth and healing is refreshing to see in dating advice. Kind regards.
I've literally dated/had a relationship with every type you described. Long story short, I prefer being single and I'm loving it! I've gotten to the point in my life that companionship is an option not a necessity..
I prefer single now too. The women today are too selfish. Even the so called "good ones". They require a huge amount of time, money, skills, and additional resources to maintain.
Nothing better to hear a call out to these pitfalls, than from a woman directly. It’s like the ultimate insider, not like a whistleblower but more like a reverse hacker working as a cyber security consultant. Thanks Courtney!
Not kidding, I was all of these traits . Girl with no friends, lonely but not materialistic. I dated my boyfriend for 3 years and relied on him so much that he was all I could talk about. I hated other women in university because they were racist and sexist. I realised that there was something toxic happening in my life. I had a lot of mental health issues and had to bring myself back to reality. I reached out to the girls I went to uni with, to my family and cousins. I have always wanted an independent career. All I need is to be self sufficient, and I’ve found that most of my girlfriends who are winners are actively avoiding dating. It’s best embodied in the ‘signs’ personality. They don’t use social media, are practically hidden from the public eye, look pretty for themselves. They put all their value into work, and hanging out with other girlfriends. They keep themselves busy. Most importantly they learn to say no, and look pretty every day as a sign of respect and love. As of right now, I put a lot of my self worth into work.
I was with until this " As of right now, I put a lot of my self worth into work." NO! What happens when the job goes away? Take it from this guy. Don't ever invest yourself, your worth, into anything so fleeting as a job. If things go bad, not only will you not have the job, you will lose all self-worth, self-esteem, etc. And without purpose, life is very very meaningless. With all respect, this is not sound advice. I 100% agree with you on the toxicity of social media. It sucks and should be burned to cinders. But only working and basing your life on that one thing will only hurt you in the end. And it will keep you from growing, as a human, IMO. Money is a thing, a fiat, a faux thing. Investing in yourself, in your knowledge, in self love, now those are real things. They are not fiat.
Were those Littles introverted introverted girls that don't have relationships with anybody really. There are some introverts that are actually sociable like I am we don't spend a whole lot of time on conversation and when we say what we got to say and then that's it but we aren't clingy we have a small group of friends for me I have female and male friends. But I'm not interested in really having a relationship and I've got my reasons for that. But all I say is find someone who can respect you and love you and not worried about what's in your pocket what kind of car you drive how much your house is things like that basically anything that's on this list. Cuz the women that have these issues are not going to change regardless of how much you try to love them and make them feel secure it's always going to be a problem
I don't mean to sound sexist, but... leave the "work defines my self-worth" shit to men. We don't have anything else that makes us valuable. It's objectively not a good place to be in and I don't understand why so many women seem to want to be in that position.
I find the "no girlfriends" woman is an issue if, as a man, you yourself actually have friends. Personally, I don't have any friends I hang out with, and, as long as we have the same interests, goals and values, it definitely won't be an issue. Just my opinion as you need to actually investigate about the true reason she doesn't have any friends.
there is difference between no friends and no pales, i dont have pales IRL i hang out with but i have friends, online and offline, we rarely meet IRL but they are friends when a girl dont have anyone who is her friends, then there is something wrong about her being an introvert isnt' an excuse to like being anti-social
@@isaura-22 are you very social and outgoing? Because as more of the chill, introverted type I seem to mostly attract the hyped, chatty and social girls. Even if I’d probably prefer someone more chill
@Paul Burgess I’m sad to hear you had to experience that. You just need to open your mind that not all those who have no friends are crazy and bi-polar. Every person is different and don’t always need dozens of friends.
Yes definitely investigate the reason why! People make assumptions about that all the time. Some people don't want friends because they want to focus on themselves and don't have enough time. It doesn't automatically mean something is wrong with them. Friendships take effort just like relationships do.
@@davidbigd9047 yes true i can relate to that so much as a girl, i used to have girl friends but they were backstabbing me, some of them bullied me. they finally left me and i had girls who hated me for no reason, its always been really hard for me i just want girl friendss but its been 4 years already still couldn't find a single one
You hit this right on the head. Especially with the girl with no friends. I've been through 20 of them and every one has a trait you described. Thanks for your work/talent.
Every woman I've "dated" in the past has had one or more of these red flags on a major level. Needless to say, I'd abandoned the relationships before they even really started. It's left me a rather unexperienced man in my mid 20s but I'm glad I didn't go down a route of the mental/emotional trauma those relationships would have probably caused. This was a really good video, the points prove to be really helpful in understanding what goes on.
My last gf was extremely insecure, at first this came off as her being shy and introvert which actually I liked, with time she opened up to me about her feeling and what experiences brought her to be like this, I couldn’t help but to fall in love with her as I have this strong desire to help people and I mistakenly though I could be the one she needed to grow out of her traumas. Needless to say this feeling didn’t last long, she became overly controlling, scrolling through my phone, always attacking me for things I never did, always thinking I was cheating on her… Ends up I wasn’t happy anymore but I kept strong, kept trying because I still loved her, I still wanted to be that person for her. Well, one day she changes her whole mind and breaks up with me out of nowhere.. People, don’t make this same mistake I did, her flaws of insecurity hit harder if you have a “savior” mentality like I had. Fix on this part of your behavior, it won’t lead to anything good in the long run P.S. On top of that she also had no friends, no life other than work and me, and no ambitions nor hobbies. I guess I hit the jackpot on her huh? 😂
One of 2 things, either she was cheating herself (people cheating often project their conflict with conscience onto their partner, thinking they're also doing the same,) or what's more likely.... She just had very low self esteem and thought you were too good for her, i.e. "it's inevitable this guy is going to meet someone better than me, I should end it sooner to avoid the feeling of being abandoned." Either way sounds like you dodged a bullet!
Well done. We need more woman like you in social media. The dating world is a scary place. I think "the narcissist" is one that should be on your list and the most dangerous of all. They can carry the tendancies of the six you mentioned and are extremely deceptive and skilled at hiding in plain sight. They are extremely insecure (mostly due to childhood trauma), not necessarily gold diggers but very secretive with their own money, manipulative, love attention and hate when other people get it, and argumentative. There are more traits, but time permits. Over all, this what very insightful and gives hope to men finding a good woman. I have always said that men should be selective (picky) in whom they date. Thank you.
The materialistic girl can also be the one who says "I don't need you to buy me things, I make my own money and can afford whatever I want,. You should want to give me nice gifts to show me you love, respect, and are thinking about me.". And when you do give her a gift, it's never good enough.
I dated a girl who always wanted expensive stuff and was extremely particular. If I ever bought her a gift on my own to surprise her (without her input) she didn’t care and sometimes actually got MAD at me for it! She wanted expensive clothes from Saks 5th and if I ever thought about say, buying literally the exact same designer brand item (like JBrand jeans) for less than half the price at TJ Maxx, she wouldn’t want it. She was a biotch!
My last girl friend was very insecure and wouldn't allowed me to go to the gym and martial arts dojo because she feels in her world that I could possibly be cheating which is extremely far from being the truth. I haven't dated since then but after seeing several of your videos Courtney, I can actually see the light in the tunnel for me, but I will manage to take my time.
It's likely because you'd be improving your mind and body, which would make other women interested in you and make her have to compete, which is uncomfortable for her. I'd just do it anyway or break it off, then hit the gym - you're not living your life for her.
Having gone to a jiu-jitsu dojo for 2 years, the idea that a man could cheat on her there is utterly laughable. I rolled with women maybe 3 times over that entire period. The desire to win and exertion from wrestling prevents me from getting aroused and I'm a horny bastard.
@@On_The_Mark She’s got a more realistic perspective than many modern women somehow. 3rd/4th wave feminism has ruined most women. They feel “empowered” by riding Richards and cheating on you later.
So, glad you brought up the "girl with substance" line. Guys are forced to figure things out the hard way in life and we learn, grow and change on that journey. We would appreciate someone who can contribute.
Idk about all that. I mean, I agree to a point, but I've met females that weren't on social media and it was usually for a good reason. And not because they didn't want to follow the crowd but more because they were anti-social and had severe mental or emotional issues and social media would just make those issues show or worse. I normally look for a female that has some form of social media but occasionally uses it, meaning that she is not addicted like she has to be on it every waking moment of every day or to feel better about herself.
Having dated dozens of women over the course of my life, I did recognize many of these types of women. It was refreshing though to hear from a woman the recognizable details of these types. Guys....this is GOLD information!
I dated a gorgeous girl some time ago, fell in love with her bad and got my heart broken. She hit many of these points that Courtney spoke about. Im over it now but it toke so long. Moral of story is be careful with women, they can literally make or break you
7. Hoarder/messy girl- the girl with 2 or 3 “junk rooms” that are too cluttered to open the door. Unless you wanna live surrounded by clutter. Plus if she’s that clingy about her possessions, imagine how she’ll be with you
Just wanted to say thanks for the videos, advice and unbiased perspective. As a man and also just as a human, I appreciate your help. Please keep making videos! 👍
This video is scary relatable I’ve dated. Someone who fit in more than 3 of these type of girls categories. Which explains why the relationship was so toxic.
Same same......i saw red flags from beginning. Went for it, didn't work . she hates/loves me. 2 months after I broke her heart, she getting married🤔. I truly just want her 2 b happy but her current relationship will %100 fail.
I'm none of them, but I don't have friends at the moment. I closed a certain chapter in my life, starting a new one. Everybody's situation can be different, it doesn't straight away mean "there's something wrong"😉
Everyone has flaws... it bothers me that people just throw one another away. What about growing together? Learning from one another? It takes dedication and work to make a successful relationship. It’s annoying that people these days just find it so easy to throw a friendship/relationship away because they’re not perfect... NOBODY is perfect.
I agree with you in general, but there are some relationships that need to end. What if your significant other lies, manipulates, and is abusive all the time? What if she tries to make you unhappy because she is unhappy and can't stand it when things go well for you? When you try to work on things with her, she says that you deserve the way that she treats you. How long will you stay in that relationship when she makes it clear that she has no intention of changing, because there is nothing wrong with the way she behaves?
@@iamrgenius I agree with you, but I think that it's hard for some people to truly change when they're "comfortable". Some things take needing a breakup to force the change into effect. That is of course depending on what the issue is. Most things should be able to be fixed if both partners are willing to fix the issues. Things like having no hobbies, friends interests is hard to change when you're in a relationship. You can try but at the end of the day you don't "need" to change because you're content with where you are. With a breakup, you're forced to take action on those things.
Oh my God, I now realize I basically checked all the types you mention ... WITHIN ONE PERSON. She was the type who made an account on Tinder with both sex preferences despite being underage and used it to look for friends. I hope she's OK now cause I didn't have the nerves to constantly look out for her
Spot on, exactly what I was looking for. Thank you. I appreciate that you softened it by not demonizing these women but said they just need to be alone and work on themselves for a bit.
You missed the woman who likes to take the relationship far too fast. Unfortunately I had to learn this three times before I finally really learned. Where they bring up marriage and their desire to want to marry you after just a couple weeks of going out with you and or even meeting you. One was wanting me to save her till she fell back in love with her ex husband, one was dying and was so submissive to the worst mother you would ever meet that literally verbally and emotionally abused me and traumatized me for years and I had to take intensive therapy and abuse support groups to get over it after I finally worked up the courage to leave and decided to not commit suicide from feeling stuck, next one also dying but was also just using me the whole time for anything she could get out of me and was a horrible abusive mother to her kids. I'm so lucky I was able to find love again and allow myself to love. Been widowed twice by two of them even though I was separated at both times. Sorry if it's too much info. I actually haven't talked about it much to anyone outside of therapy. Guess I feel like you're an easy one to trust.
1:12 “we all have a little bit of insecurity, especially with the rise of social media and the constant comparison game” Spot on accurate. It’s pretty much why the mental health of people, especially younger generations, is so much worse now. And it’s why I limit the amount of social media I’m on. I just don’t need any of that. A lot of people out there would be so much better off without the drama caused by it. It’s useful to a point, like keeping contacts, but that’s what text messages and phone calls are for
I was told by wise old grandmas that if your girl friend makes you soup when your sick and offers to clean up your place , sweeping the kitchen floor etc... she is a keeper. look for these traights.
I would like a female like courtney, who is beautiful, level headed, mature and elegant. Also i would want a female who would love me for being myself and is on my level.
9:54, You got this one right, Courtney. Men and women need to take a pause right after a breakup. They need to assess what happened and what they can do to prevent it from happening again.
To say you are beautiful is to say nothing .To say that you are sharing wisdom- is to say nothing. But if you share your beauty and wisdom - you are invaluable ❤❤
This has been such a great week overall, and a big part of that is seeing your videos often!! ❤️ I’ve been making a lot of progress thanks to your channel
Funny lies girls tell that make me laugh: "I do not care about height". "I do not judge guys on looks". "I only care about personality". "I do not have a type". "I am attracted to all kinds of guys". "I am not like other girls". "I am not shallow". "I do not care how much money a guy has". "I do not mind splitting the bill on a first date". "I have not been with that many guys". "I am not really seeing anyone right now".
That second to last one is the most dangerous one when faced with the choice as a man "to commit or not to commit" The more guys she's been with, the less like you will be to measure up to "the best she's ever had" and she will resent you for it and possibly leave you for it.
@@jesuslovesyou7130 you can’t get left behind or cucked if you don’t have a girlfriend. Have your turn, get your XP, and onto the next one. At your own pace of course. It’s not for everyone but this is the world (hookup culture) society at large has accepted unfortunately Chivalry is beyond dead. It has fully decayed into dust and bones
You are my new favorite channel, Courtney. Great video. It serves as a reinforcement for women that I always try to avoid! I love your positive reinforcement and candidness. I wish your channel existed 20 years ago when I was a young man without any confidence. 🙂
Some very useful advice in this one, thank you Courtney! 😊 Numbers 2 & 4 defo applied for me recently but loosely at the same time and this content has helped me put things into perspective! Plus kinda crossed paths with a 6 but I already knew that! 😂 cheers for the vids, keep it coming 👍
I have friends but not really any in my home town. I think friendless girls are most likely to cheat if things go sour. But as we approach our 30s you naturally have less friends as you get older.
A lot of girls are like this, I agree. It’s okay to have rest days and relax/take a break but if this is all they do 24/7 I’m sorry but that’s a problem 🤐
thank you so much!!!! been dealing with a girl that fits in everysingle category for the las 5 years, this is an eye opener, god bless you and all the ppl in the coments!
I foolishly tried to pursue a girl in my social circle who fit the social media addict persona you described. She never really expressed interest in me in that way and I quickly realized I wasn't missing out when she mentioned that she was having conversations with random married men.
#3....you can tell a lot about somebody by what kind of friends he/she has. Many people are bad influences, or manipulators. But a girl with 'guy' friends is a major red flag, especially if they are older or married. 🚩
I kind of disagree with the "has no girlfriends" one because im with one and its been the best relationship I've ever had. Reason why she has no (or extremely low ) friends list is due to people not treating her like a person and not giving her a chance. People can be awful people for no reason.
Very interesting, not only because it helps identify aspects of recent relationship that were on the wrong side of the road, but also because I can rely on some of the elements there - yes guys can be like this as well (at least some traits)!! I started the relationship pretty confident, with my life on the side and became gradually lazy, insecure, depressive, with less and less friends time. Needless to say it ended badly. I guess those are not personality traits as much as wounds you need to see, accept, and heal actively. Thanks for the video!
Something I realized just a few years ago: Most girls don't have hobbies. This isn't meant as an insult, for some reason most girls I've met are literally hobbyless. What they like to do is often limited to shopping and traveling which aren't hobbies, literally everybody likes that. As a guy you need to be their entertainer 24/7 and if you can't be that, they're mad and make you feel guilty
The insecure girl may not go through your phone while you're sleeping, she may also ask to see you're phone, you say no, and she accuses you right away of trying to hide something from her when all you want is to establish boundaries.
Same here. I'm picky with who I hang out with both women and men. I had girlfriends in my life but they no longer wanted to keep in touch. I don't know if I am the problem or if it's just them. Their choice. If I was a problem they could tell me that.
Courtney your advice is spot on. I am 56 yr old professional and have dated women across the spectrum to include other countries outside the USA. Enjoying your content. Thanks
First time subscriber. I love the sound of your voice. It’s calm and soothing. Great information on how to avoid getting into a rocky relationship and just waiting for the right one.
There is no perfect guy or a girl. But each girl has her own perfect guy in her head. Everyone has standards and no one can be judged because of it. If you do, you die alone because no one's gonna change this fact
Date a girl who you share dreams and similar values with. She must know her standards in a relationship and knows exactly what she's looking for. High quality men and women are interdependent and are intentional in dating and/or choosing a partner. These are very important to a lasting, valuable, and meaningful relationship, in my opinion.
The Tarzan girl: grabs one tree before letting go of the first-much like the rebound girl but is pre-empting being broken up with (even if said breakup is only in her head)
Dated the attention addict for 6 months. Red flags: -Phone number not saved, later as an alias of my name -Doesn't want to be your girlfriend -Doesn't want to be seen intimate in public spaces -Asks what I like about her and why I chose for her all the time -Acts like shes always scattered And finally like Courtney said, in the beginning shes all over you and at a moment where things will become serious, she starts pulling back and after a while shes completely closes the door on you. Thank you Courtney! Your advice helped me understand what was going on and realize what person I actually dealt with. And don't forget, love makes you blind
It's difficult to deal with women whom are suicidal, especially now during covid pandemic. Anyone, regardless of gender. We all suffered trauma from this pandemic in one form or another. The haunted asylum understands. You are not alone. Wish I could help but I am as broke as most people. The diaries of the Black Plague in the 1350s were so sad, it melted my sould reading it during the 2020 early outbreak of covid. Despite all our medical tech, we can't fight a virus in time. I always argued with healthcare, doctors and nurses to stop putting money first, and put human beings first, but to no avail. The haunted asylum has spoken...
Doctor Ryan. Fantastic information! You have for sure enlighten me with your superb knowledge on the subject. Now, I can think of another example. "The Leach". This type of specimen has a very particular modus operandy. This specimen meets all the qualifications you described as green flags but only temporarily. Once the marriage has been consummated, things start to change slowly but continuously (like boiling a frog). Within a few months, I found myself with a wife that did not want to work anymore, watch TV and spoke on the telephone all day long, wanted to know where I was at all times and expected me to bring dinner on my way from work because she did not have time to hit the kitchen.
Oh the last two items on the list, so so true and as C.S. Lewis once said, "Experience is the most brutal of teachers but you learn, my God, do you learn".
Yes and no to girl #3. I will say that sometimes a super sheltered individual needs a guide to learning how to meet people. Sometimes you can work passed it. Most times run away. Level 5 Cling-on Velcro Girl. I will say I was one of very few partners she ever had. I did end up mentoring her how to build relationships with others. In her case she was willing to work pass her issues. I was patient enough to guide her. Even though yes I had days it was hard on me. And yes at times I had to look past my own resentment towards her. The main difference is, is someone able to think beyond themselves and grow. I was an introvert whom knew how to socialize. She was an extrovert that was raised by introverts that just sheltered her more. Now she is this social little butterfly that I lovingly tag along. In that way you drag the old dog to the dog park. Yes he likes it but is perfectly content to be in the yard chewing on sticks.
I know girls who hop from one relationship to the next and I have no idea how they do it. When I break up with someone I'm single for at least 2-3 years by choice, and I spend that time self reflecting and wondering how I can better myself. The ones who hop just seem to get stuck in some Groundhog Day loop of false happiness and intermittent, imminent misery and because they don't reflect on themselves they end up ruining the next rebound, then the next, and so on in the same way. These people need to learn to love themselves and appreciate their own company more, but they unfortunately never give themselves the chance and need that instant dating dopamine hit. The cycle continues.
I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met.
Man how does that work?
had her to the list..... never date a psychic
Hahahaha
That's the best thing I've heard all day!
@@elmerbautista6400, hate to break it to you, man. It doesn’t work. 😂
I'm a time saver ;)
1.Insecure Girl
2.Materialistic Girl
3.Lonely Girl with no friends
4.Lazy Girl
5.Attention addict
6.Rebound seeker
I want a lonely girl, especially if they don’t have friends that are guys.
That pretty much describes about 75% of the women out there. The other 25% are high quality enough that they attracted a man they consider worthy and an "alpha".
@@jhil5160 whattt?? A lonely girl?? they see they have you’re validation or attention they’ll seek it somewhere else 🤣
All this info was copy pasted from Google, and then she makes a boring video about it 💩
Im number 3 by myself :(
I'd add Party Girls to the list too… if she's always out partying & still doing drugs especially as she gets older then that's deal breaker
Almost all party girls have an incurable STI of some kind, so definitely stay away. There's a reason twice as many women have genital herpes than men, never mind cold sores as far as the eye can see. A party girl's mattress has been ridden harder than a '98 Corolla.
Facts
@@jdanon203 are you bringing up The33Secrets’s references of the wrecked up Toyota Corolla?
Still doing drugs? I would say that having done drugs at all should be a deal breaker.
@@johnmininger7472 drugs are dope, not hard drugs tho
My biggest red flag is a woman that's constantly on social media. Social media isn't a bad thing, but when your life revolves around it, yeah, that's not good. I enjoy your videos Courtney! Keep up the good work!
Yeah but both of the remaining women are already taken.
Social media is just the evil of this century. It's designed to encourage abusive use of it.
What woman in America is not constantly on social media? lol
@@SecretSpots and that's why guys are looking abroad.
Yeah this is so true.
“Girl with no friends” is also a red flag for women who want to be their friend. Whenever a girl says things like “I don’t have girlfriends because girls are drama” I know immediately that that girl is the drama. I steer clear of girls like that.
Those same girls also almost always have mostly if not nothing but guys as friends. She keeps these guys around as affirmation as these men almost always Wana be with that girl or to hook up with that girl. And you aren't allowed to have any friends who are girls....because SHE "knows" how girls are... yet dismisses your concerns about all guy friends as if it's "different" lol
lol yupppppp when a friend I had said "oh wow ur the only girl friend I have cuz your bi, so ur less drama, girls are usually so over into it--they don't get it" lol.........I become a bit uncomfortable. for one thing I don't like people bringing up what they think my sexuality is, but also..... girl friends are great, they are not dramatic they are usually more openly talking about relationship issues, and talk through solutions empathetically ... eventually this friend exploded and left my life but.... I should have known LOL. When someone says "they don't like drama" usually........ they bring drama.
I don't get why anyone good in there heart would have a lot of friends. I don't get that...i mean a good person can't make a lot of friends because there just isn't that many good people. So good people steer clear of not so good people. You can't be peer pressured if you avoid the people that would put you in that situation.
@@dubspot420 I guess that depends on your definition of good.
That's your opinion. But what if she's right and throughout her experiences she's had friends who are drama queens, because that's a definite possibility and there are more girls like that than there are drama free and friendless girls. Me personally, I'd much rather be with a drama free than drama queen.
The "Girl with no girlfriends" is also the prime offender of the homie hop. Because she has no social circle of her own, she will adopt yours. So when you break up, your homebois become her dating pool.
Like...a freaking virus...
they ain't your homies if that's the case
i sort of knew this was a red flag with my ex but i still let it go. and now shes hanging out with my homies, lesson learned.
What if the "girl with no friend" is simply with no friend because she is introverted?
@@ATH-camCommentator that's different and you'll have to figure out if that's actually the case. But even introverts have friends.
Remember everyone: She doesn't control you, you don't control her. She doesn't manipulate you, you don't manipulate her. Life is easier if you're good partners with someone. Make sure you choose a good partner in life as they would expect you to be a good partner as well.
@JewTube WorldOrder I 100% agree that everyone, man or woman should just focus on themselves and not worry about dating and that life is better that way, but I wouldn’t say women are “damaged goods.” Some of them are emotional and have had a rough time with a lot of things, and some of them can be dramatic, (hell, I know a lot of grown ass men that act that way too), but everyone’s out here tryina survive and just be respected. That doesn’t make the majority of women damaged or “goods.”
I am sure most people disagree with You but Nature of women proved you true.
Yep
I'm really hard to find them where's this place??? I'm Outdoors not at the bars
There are no good partners. Men are better off living their lives separate from women as all women are insane psycho - women.
I feel like every guy has to go through a psycho girl phase to learn what to avoid and appreciate a good woman when she comes around
What if a guy never goes through a psycho girl phase because he knows to avoid them?
@@TheSergio1021 then good on you man. I was really young when it happened to me and red pill and Courtney's Channel didn't really exist back then haha
Yep. Been there
Yup, some crazy girl i dated once didn't accepted that i dumped her, and started to chase me with a damn knife :v
I once had a goth girlfriend , and she was quite the psycho . Between the bloodletting and the random tases , she left me quite traumatized. I still miss her sometimes.
Your list reminds me of the list in the book "How to Love". Based on that, I'd add:
1. The victim (AKA vulnerable or covert narcissist)--this is the #1 most likely thing you need to avoid
2. Other narcissists, sociopaths, psychopaths, mean girls (they enjoy other people's pain), hateful girls (their lives are never-ending rants), etc.
3. The girl who suffers from bipolar disorder or an excess of depression
4. Girls who suffer from borderline personality disorder
5. Hard-core addicts
6. Girls who have too much trauma to be able to form a stable, long-lasting bond (like Homer Simpson's mom or Jenny from Forrest Gump)
All women are narcissists and should be avoided at all cost!!!
I can relate. I was married to a covert Narcissist with Bipolar & depression. Now divorced from her 10 years, and looking back, I truly feel I lost 20 years of my life with her.
Don't walk but RUN from narcissistic women with mental issues!!!
@@gc4644 I agree, but sometimes, we don't know who we are married to until we are divorced. I can relate and I also feel I lost too many years on this type of woman. It is just so hard to know because people can fool you and tell what you want to hear, but you have to be careful.
@mattirealm I call it the Cinderella mask, women are VERY good at hiding their crazy and inner bitch, they can even do it for years if/when necessary. They only drop the mask once they know all their options are gone or when there is close to 100% probability that they will win Alimony and/or Child Support..
Thanks for adding to the list. Two of my personal most important criteria are:
a)) does she communicate well. This includes her speaking up if something isn't quite working for her or if she's slightly annoyed or if she wants a slight adjustment to the relationship. If she literally only says positive things and zero negative things / "could we change this slightly" / "this annoyed me slightly" things for say a month, then she's probably not communicating her annoyances and needs, which means those annoyances will grow and that may eventually nuke the relationship or at least lead to an unnecessarily large fight.
b) is she actually working on herself on an emotional / mental (and if you're into that, spiritual) level, including at times when that's not strictly necessary. I think everyone has some old psychological pain or bad habits or whatever and can use this, even if it's only something like journaling or her trying to understand perspectives she doesn't agree with or something.
Wow I've dated girls that have had one these traits a couple of times but the last relationship I just got out of she was like four of them. Hard to really analyze red flags until you take a step back, and I found out the hard way. She was Insecure, materialistic and only cared about vanity, had no girlfriends and a horrible relationship with her family, and was an attention addict and started looking to other men during the end of things. She was drop-dead gorgeous (looked like Audrey Hepburn), I was so enthralled with her beauty and the things I thought were "good" that I stayed in that relationship. Most painful seven months of my life. Then found out she was the rebound seeker and moved in with a guy a week after meeting him for a place to stay. Crazy. Very insightful, thank you for the video Courtney. Stay strong gents!
And that's the halo effect for ya
Bruh I just dated one that had all of this 6 traits. 4 months of nightmare.
Men need to become full stack men before they go out into the dating field.
Full stack meaning you actually are on your purpose in life and moving forward. If you want a high value women you need to become a high value man! You attract what you are.
100% agree. Self-actualization is crucial for having a successful, healthy relationship.
Too many men suddenly proclaim themselves "High Value" and worthy of High Value Women, when just yesterday they were not. Just because you believe that you are High Value, doesn't mean others do. If you do not have the resources and resume/cv to back up that confidence -- you're just arrogant and full of yourself.
@@David-lx4yb couldn’t agree more David.
I'm actually glad I was with my woman before I chose my career, as it's not conducive for any kind of a dating life (due to work hours and shifts)
Self actualization is so rare I have not seen a person yet who has achieved that goal. Most people are just average and lofty goals are not even in there radar.
Let's not forget the indifferent one. The one that she is constantly busy, dont have time for you, she expects you to be the one that talks to her first but she never does the same for you and when you dont contact her she gets annoyed. She always keep you waiting and she never keep her word, she can promise you to be better at something and she never does, but when you make a promise and you dont fulfill it then she gets angry at you. These are the ones that makes you say "it's better to be alone than being with bad company".
This sounds like a narcissist, someone who uses others with no remorse or empathy. They will never change, run away.
I think we have the same ex
I literally just broke up with a girl like that. She always gets mad at me whenever I want attention from her and never texted me first. Plus I noticed she was getting friendly with this Ian guy. sounds pretty sus to me
Wow, that's quite a shock for me, cause Ive met a Girl I actually really liked, but this message just describes her pretty much...
Every girl I meet is obsessed with social media so frustrating they just stare at their phone all day thanks for the advice ❤️❤️
@@jamesg1974a just stay single no girl is worth it
@@MrPapi235 trust bro don’t fall for these creatures most of them will be ur down fall
@@ehsan-6835 that’s why stay single become successful on ur own and spend all ur millions on urself and take over the world
@@MrPapi235 I disagree, I'm engaged to a great woman, she may not be perfect, but she's perfect for me, and that's what counts at.the end of the day. We've been together 7 years and still aren't bored of each other
@@FirebirdCamaro1220 good for u I just hope u never regret it
*The type that constantly seeks drama or thrives on attention is a huge red flag. It’s not just about avoiding toxic traits; it’s about investing in a relationship that adds value to your life!*
Excellent video! I would also add the Damsel in Distress type. This is someone who always has a problem that she can't fix herself, and is constantly looking for someone to solve her puzzles. Problem is: her problems never seem to get solved.
Another type I would avoid, is the gambler. I grew up in Las Vegas, and trust me, if a woman is intrigued by casinos and slot machines, run for your life. This one will also typically be the Damsel in Distress type, which is a symptom of a deeper problem.
I am 70 now, and very fortunate that I married the right girl at a very young age. (49 years together now) I have spent a lifetime observing people, and have seen em come and go. Often while never learning the obvious lesson(s) I could write a book.
Way to go, Courtney. I hope you have a lot of success with your channel.
I have this habit of watching men's lifestyle improvement videos every night before bed and Courtney dropping 8 videos this week has been really helpful, probably one of the best things that happened this week.
Cheers to you Courtney for helping us.
Happy to do it. Thanks for being here 🥰
Do you have 8 days in the week??? What is your secret?
I've dated a girl that fits into more than one of these categories and it was one of the most toxic relationships I've ever had. Suggesting walking away and personal growth and healing is refreshing to see in dating advice. Kind regards.
I've literally dated/had a relationship with every type you described. Long story short, I prefer being single and I'm loving it! I've gotten to the point in my life that companionship is an option not a necessity..
You are 100% correct .
What about sex? How you manage to have it?
@@monish_sundrani You do not need sex.
I prefer single now too. The women today are too selfish. Even the so called "good ones". They require a huge amount of time, money, skills, and additional resources to maintain.
The best path to take! If all men did this civilization will survive and humanity too.
Nothing better to hear a call out to these pitfalls, than from a woman directly. It’s like the ultimate insider, not like a whistleblower but more like a reverse hacker working as a cyber security consultant. Thanks Courtney!
Not kidding, I was all of these traits . Girl with no friends, lonely but not materialistic. I dated my boyfriend for 3 years and relied on him so much that he was all I could talk about. I hated other women in university because they were racist and sexist. I realised that there was something toxic happening in my life. I had a lot of mental health issues and had to bring myself back to reality. I reached out to the girls I went to uni with, to my family and cousins. I have always wanted an independent career.
All I need is to be self sufficient, and I’ve found that most of my girlfriends who are winners are actively avoiding dating. It’s best embodied in the ‘signs’ personality. They don’t use social media, are practically hidden from the public eye, look pretty for themselves.
They put all their value into work, and hanging out with other girlfriends. They keep themselves busy. Most importantly they learn to say no, and look pretty every day as a sign of respect and love. As of right now, I put a lot of my self worth into work.
🙌 You go, girl!
I was with until this " As of right now, I put a lot of my self worth into work." NO! What happens when the job goes away? Take it from this guy. Don't ever invest yourself, your worth, into anything so fleeting as a job. If things go bad, not only will you not have the job, you will lose all self-worth, self-esteem, etc. And without purpose, life is very very meaningless. With all respect, this is not sound advice.
I 100% agree with you on the toxicity of social media. It sucks and should be burned to cinders. But only working and basing your life on that one thing will only hurt you in the end. And it will keep you from growing, as a human, IMO. Money is a thing, a fiat, a faux thing. Investing in yourself, in your knowledge, in self love, now those are real things. They are not fiat.
Were those Littles introverted introverted girls that don't have relationships with anybody really. There are some introverts that are actually sociable like I am we don't spend a whole lot of time on conversation and when we say what we got to say and then that's it but we aren't clingy we have a small group of friends for me I have female and male friends. But I'm not interested in really having a relationship and I've got my reasons for that. But all I say is find someone who can respect you and love you and not worried about what's in your pocket what kind of car you drive how much your house is things like that basically anything that's on this list. Cuz the women that have these issues are not going to change regardless of how much you try to love them and make them feel secure it's always going to be a problem
I don't mean to sound sexist, but... leave the "work defines my self-worth" shit to men. We don't have anything else that makes us valuable. It's objectively not a good place to be in and I don't understand why so many women seem to want to be in that position.
They all age and die lonely without children. They lost the evolutionary game.
Courtneys voice is so soft. It's a powerful tool for her
Totally agree. Love her voice! You're awesome Courtney!
I can feel she was ovulating on that time of the month, very smart way to make a video.
Fake accent she has actually !!
The way she speaks is NO way it's naturally lol 🤣🤣🤣
I find the "no girlfriends" woman is an issue if, as a man, you yourself actually have friends. Personally, I don't have any friends I hang out with, and, as long as we have the same interests, goals and values, it definitely won't be an issue. Just my opinion as you need to actually investigate about the true reason she doesn't have any friends.
there is difference between no friends and no pales, i dont have pales IRL i hang out with
but i have friends, online and offline, we rarely meet IRL
but they are friends
when a girl dont have anyone who is her friends, then there is something wrong about her
being an introvert isnt' an excuse to like being anti-social
@@isaura-22 are you very social and outgoing? Because as more of the chill, introverted type I seem to mostly attract the hyped, chatty and social girls. Even if I’d probably prefer someone more chill
@Paul Burgess I’m sad to hear you had to experience that. You just need to open your mind that not all those who have no friends are crazy and bi-polar. Every person is different and don’t always need dozens of friends.
Yes definitely investigate the reason why! People make assumptions about that all the time. Some people don't want friends because they want to focus on themselves and don't have enough time. It doesn't automatically mean something is wrong with them. Friendships take effort just like relationships do.
@@davidbigd9047 yes true i can relate to that so much as a girl, i used to have girl friends but they were backstabbing me, some of them bullied me. they finally left me and i had girls who hated me for no reason, its always been really hard for me i just want girl friendss but its been 4 years already still couldn't find a single one
“Is she just insecure about her life and is projecting it on you”
TLDR If she thinks you’re cheating she is cheating
I always love coming back to these videos years later, because this channel feels like a journey. So much can happen in a year!
You hit this right on the head. Especially with the girl with no friends. I've been through 20 of them and every one has a trait you described. Thanks for your work/talent.
Every woman I've "dated" in the past has had one or more of these red flags on a major level. Needless to say, I'd abandoned the relationships before they even really started. It's left me a rather unexperienced man in my mid 20s but I'm glad I didn't go down a route of the mental/emotional trauma those relationships would have probably caused. This was a really good video, the points prove to be really helpful in understanding what goes on.
You saved yourself with that.
Definitely the right choice
Yup had to learn the hard way lmfao
I've had to learn the hard way, & I've just become jaded and numb. You definitely saved yourself from unnecessary hurts
Mid 20s wow you did great. I'm 39 and only start to realize I had zero to few healthy relationships. Keep it up!
A woman that has passion, drive and knows what she wants is incredibly attractive! Courtney, what can I say, you're purely genuine
Wtf.. supersimp
Sad
Wow....my ex girlfriend was all of these. Would've saved myself 3 years of grief trying to make her happy and understand her. I had no chance.
F in the chat
My last gf was extremely insecure, at first this came off as her being shy and introvert which actually I liked, with time she opened up to me about her feeling and what experiences brought her to be like this, I couldn’t help but to fall in love with her as I have this strong desire to help people and I mistakenly though I could be the one she needed to grow out of her traumas.
Needless to say this feeling didn’t last long, she became overly controlling, scrolling through my phone, always attacking me for things I never did, always thinking I was cheating on her…
Ends up I wasn’t happy anymore but I kept strong, kept trying because I still loved her, I still wanted to be that person for her.
Well, one day she changes her whole mind and breaks up with me out of nowhere..
People, don’t make this same mistake I did, her flaws of insecurity hit harder if you have a “savior” mentality like I had.
Fix on this part of your behavior, it won’t lead to anything good in the long run
P.S. On top of that she also had no friends, no life other than work and me, and no ambitions nor hobbies.
I guess I hit the jackpot on her huh? 😂
She did you a favor by breaking up
Literally the same experience. Sorry.
Sounds like my ex. Sorry mate
One of 2 things, either she was cheating herself (people cheating often project their conflict with conscience onto their partner, thinking they're also doing the same,) or what's more likely.... She just had very low self esteem and thought you were too good for her, i.e. "it's inevitable this guy is going to meet someone better than me, I should end it sooner to avoid the feeling of being abandoned." Either way sounds like you dodged a bullet!
We must always remember 'you cant save her'. Its tough though, when you genuinely want to help people.
Well done. We need more woman like you in social media. The dating world is a scary place.
I think "the narcissist" is one that should be on your list and the most dangerous of all. They can carry the tendancies of the six you mentioned and are extremely deceptive and skilled at hiding in plain sight. They are extremely insecure (mostly due to childhood trauma), not necessarily gold diggers but very secretive with their own money, manipulative, love attention and hate when other people get it, and argumentative. There are more traits, but time permits.
Over all, this what very insightful and gives hope to men finding a good woman. I have always said that men should be selective (picky) in whom they date. Thank you.
The materialistic girl can also be the one who says "I don't need you to buy me things, I make my own money and can afford whatever I want,. You should want to give me nice gifts to show me you love, respect, and are thinking about me.". And when you do give her a gift, it's never good enough.
Do you know my ex lol but fr my ex was a true Narrcasist.
I gave her a box of food and snacks, she loved it.
I dated a girl who always wanted expensive stuff and was extremely particular. If I ever bought her a gift on my own to surprise her (without her input) she didn’t care and sometimes actually got MAD at me for it! She wanted expensive clothes from Saks 5th and if I ever thought about say, buying literally the exact same designer brand item (like JBrand jeans) for less than half the price at TJ Maxx, she wouldn’t want it. She was a biotch!
My last girl friend was very insecure and wouldn't allowed me to go to the gym and martial arts dojo because she feels in her world that I could possibly be cheating which is extremely far from being the truth. I haven't dated since then but after seeing several of your videos Courtney, I can actually see the light in the tunnel for me, but I will manage to take my time.
It's likely because you'd be improving your mind and body, which would make other women interested in you and make her have to compete, which is uncomfortable for her. I'd just do it anyway or break it off, then hit the gym - you're not living your life for her.
Having gone to a jiu-jitsu dojo for 2 years, the idea that a man could cheat on her there is utterly laughable. I rolled with women maybe 3 times over that entire period. The desire to win and exertion from wrestling prevents me from getting aroused and I'm a horny bastard.
"what does she like to do.. nobody knoooows" I just thought that line was funny. Much love Courtney
😂😂❤️
I was about to comment on the same thing. Her surprise word choices or tones of voice are one of the reasons I enjoy Courtney's videos.
@@On_The_Mark She’s got a more realistic perspective than many modern women somehow. 3rd/4th wave feminism has ruined most women. They feel “empowered” by riding Richards and cheating on you later.
@@CourtneyRyan Would have been better if you added "and neither does she"
Hiding children :)
So, glad you brought up the "girl with substance" line. Guys are forced to figure things out the hard way in life and we learn, grow and change on that journey. We would appreciate someone who can contribute.
You're a very uplifting women. To acknowledge that nobody is perfect and everybody has room for improvement without putting them below 💯
Hi Courtney. This one is based on my personal experiences. She's a single mum with multiple kids from multiple father.
Don't even go there lol.
Avoid at all costs!
Run, son! Just run!!!
Bro leave
Run to the hills!🎶🎸
Run for your liiiiivess!🎶🎶🎸
The very rare woman who doesn't do social media is the woman worth your efforts.
That is a woman i would like to meet.
Idk about all that. I mean, I agree to a point, but I've met females that weren't on social media and it was usually for a good reason. And not because they didn't want to follow the crowd but more because they were anti-social and had severe mental or emotional issues and social media would just make those issues show or worse. I normally look for a female that has some form of social media but occasionally uses it, meaning that she is not addicted like she has to be on it every waking moment of every day or to feel better about herself.
I'll definitely keep my eyes open to look for these types. Thanks again!
You’re so welcome! Thanks Jordan!
When was the first time you thanked her?
Sometimes it is all these types rolled into one narcissist.
Having dated dozens of women over the course of my life, I did recognize many of these types of women. It was refreshing though to hear from a woman the recognizable details of these types.
Guys....this is GOLD information!
GUYS Don´t the Girls who rides the CC
I dated a gorgeous girl some time ago, fell in love with her bad and got my heart broken. She hit many of these points that Courtney spoke about. Im over it now but it toke so long. Moral of story is be careful with women, they can literally make or break you
I love Courtney’s voice, pitch, pace, tone. Everything!! I could listen to you all day. Much love from South Africa 🇿🇦❤️. New subbie 😘
7. Hoarder/messy girl- the girl with 2 or 3 “junk rooms” that are too cluttered to open the door. Unless you wanna live surrounded by clutter. Plus if she’s that clingy about her possessions, imagine how she’ll be with you
Just wanted to say thanks for the videos, advice and unbiased perspective. As a man and also just as a human, I appreciate your help. Please keep making videos! 👍
This video is scary relatable I’ve dated. Someone who fit in more than 3 of these type of girls categories. Which explains why the relationship was so toxic.
Same same......i saw red flags from beginning. Went for it, didn't work . she hates/loves me. 2 months after I broke her heart, she getting married🤔. I truly just want her 2 b happy but her current relationship will %100 fail.
Our lady helping us out 100% 🙏🏻
that’s right 👏🏼
@@CourtneyRyan Great job!
This is really helping me realize I dodged a bullet. You were so spot on with the attention addict, connecting so many dots.
Im very glad a woman understands what the best of us go through
I'm none of them, but I don't have friends at the moment. I closed a certain chapter in my life, starting a new one. Everybody's situation can be different, it doesn't straight away mean "there's something wrong"😉
Everyone has flaws... it bothers me that people just throw one another away. What about growing together? Learning from one another? It takes dedication and work to make a successful relationship. It’s annoying that people these days just find it so easy to throw a friendship/relationship away because they’re not perfect... NOBODY is perfect.
I agree with you in general, but there are some relationships that need to end. What if your significant other lies, manipulates, and is abusive all the time? What if she tries to make you unhappy because she is unhappy and can't stand it when things go well for you? When you try to work on things with her, she says that you deserve the way that she treats you. How long will you stay in that relationship when she makes it clear that she has no intention of changing, because there is nothing wrong with the way she behaves?
Paul Wheeler in that case I agree with you. I believe most things can be worked out aside from infidelity and abuse.
@@iamrgenius I agree with you, but I think that it's hard for some people to truly change when they're "comfortable". Some things take needing a breakup to force the change into effect. That is of course depending on what the issue is. Most things should be able to be fixed if both partners are willing to fix the issues. Things like having no hobbies, friends interests is hard to change when you're in a relationship. You can try but at the end of the day you don't "need" to change because you're content with where you are. With a breakup, you're forced to take action on those things.
not your job to deal with toxic traits
Some issues are deal breakers!
Why can’t we all just find a girl like Courtney 🥺🥺🥺🥺
If there were enough girls like Courtney for everyone we would never know about Courtney.
She seems like a nice girl :)
You guys are the best 🥺🥺🥺
@@tombworld9012 😂😂😂 exactly
They’re few and far between and unavailable.
Types of women to date:
- She helps other men dress better
I see what you did there
She's not your mom. You can't expect from a partner to make you better
@@lafemme4331 you clearly don’t get it
@@lafemme4331 You need to see another of Courtney's videos to get that joke.
@@lafemme4331 bye Felicia
Oh my God, I now realize I basically checked all the types you mention ... WITHIN ONE PERSON. She was the type who made an account on Tinder with both sex preferences despite being underage and used it to look for friends. I hope she's OK now cause I didn't have the nerves to constantly look out for her
Spot on, exactly what I was looking for. Thank you. I appreciate that you softened it by not demonizing these women but said they just need to be alone and work on themselves for a bit.
You missed the woman who likes to take the relationship far too fast. Unfortunately I had to learn this three times before I finally really learned. Where they bring up marriage and their desire to want to marry you after just a couple weeks of going out with you and or even meeting you. One was wanting me to save her till she fell back in love with her ex husband, one was dying and was so submissive to the worst mother you would ever meet that literally verbally and emotionally abused me and traumatized me for years and I had to take intensive therapy and abuse support groups to get over it after I finally worked up the courage to leave and decided to not commit suicide from feeling stuck, next one also dying but was also just using me the whole time for anything she could get out of me and was a horrible abusive mother to her kids. I'm so lucky I was able to find love again and allow myself to love. Been widowed twice by two of them even though I was separated at both times. Sorry if it's too much info. I actually haven't talked about it much to anyone outside of therapy. Guess I feel like you're an easy one to trust.
Why did you date/marry women who were dying?
@@thecurrentmoment He is a gold digger
1:12 “we all have a little bit of insecurity, especially with the rise of social media and the constant comparison game”
Spot on accurate. It’s pretty much why the mental health of people, especially younger generations, is so much worse now. And it’s why I limit the amount of social media I’m on. I just don’t need any of that. A lot of people out there would be so much better off without the drama caused by it. It’s useful to a point, like keeping contacts, but that’s what text messages and phone calls are for
Yeah, I personally have an Instagram account but I purposefully don't scroll much because I know it is psychologically unhealthy.
I was told by wise old grandmas that if your girl friend makes you soup when your sick and offers to clean up your place , sweeping the kitchen floor etc... she is a keeper. look for these traights.
Definitely!
They don't exist xD
Have never found one of those! They exist??
I’ve been through it all. Just don’t let the excitement die out humans like to have fun.
Oh lord! I just got out of a relationship with a girl that was all this 6 at the same time! I can’t believe this.
I would like a female like courtney, who is beautiful, level headed, mature and elegant. Also i would want a female who would love me for being myself and is on my level.
Yee but this girl is hard to get and if you can't be constantly on her level she will loose interest in you and break your heart
@@klosaftkrieger1027 That's the way she goes. Sometimes she goes and sometimes she doesn't. Just the way she goes.
Shoutout to everyone moving forward with their lives!
Definitely avoid girls with lots of guy friends
C’mon bro, I already have a girlfriend, nothing to worry about. 😈
i OnLy HaNg OuT wItH gUyS bEcUz ThErE's LeSs DrAmA LOLOL
@@zerodood nailed it.....
Just avoid all girls in general
@@MrPapi235 And start nailing men... Lol
9:54, You got this one right, Courtney. Men and women need to take a pause right after a breakup. They need to assess what happened and what they can do to prevent it from happening again.
To say you are beautiful is to say nothing .To say that you are sharing wisdom- is to say nothing. But if you share your beauty and wisdom - you are invaluable ❤❤
This has been such a great week overall, and a big part of that is seeing your videos often!! ❤️ I’ve been making a lot of progress thanks to your channel
So happy to hear!! Thank you 🥰
@@CourtneyRyan You’re absolutely welcome!! 🥰
Funny lies girls tell that make me laugh:
"I do not care about height".
"I do not judge guys on looks".
"I only care about personality".
"I do not have a type".
"I am attracted to all kinds of guys".
"I am not like other girls".
"I am not shallow".
"I do not care how much money a guy has".
"I do not mind splitting the bill on a first date".
"I have not been with that many guys".
"I am not really seeing anyone right now".
That second to last one is the most dangerous one when faced with the choice as a man "to commit or not to commit"
The more guys she's been with, the less like you will be to measure up to "the best she's ever had" and she will resent you for it and possibly leave you for it.
@@lordofgingers yep so true
@@lordofgingers that was deep
@@jesuslovesyou7130 you can’t get left behind or cucked if you don’t have a girlfriend. Have your turn, get your XP, and onto the next one. At your own pace of course.
It’s not for everyone but this is the world (hookup culture) society at large has accepted unfortunately
Chivalry is beyond dead. It has fully decayed into dust and bones
That second to the last is golden. And remember guys, she doesn't count men outside the country, she's only counting domestically, lol.
You are my new favorite channel, Courtney. Great video. It serves as a reinforcement for women that I always try to avoid! I love your positive reinforcement and candidness. I wish your channel existed 20 years ago when I was a young man without any confidence. 🙂
Some very useful advice in this one, thank you Courtney! 😊 Numbers 2 & 4 defo applied for me recently but loosely at the same time and this content has helped me put things into perspective! Plus kinda crossed paths with a 6 but I already knew that! 😂 cheers for the vids, keep it coming 👍
I can say truly I've been guilty of some and definitely not of all these warnings. I'm ashamed and proud to admit that thank you for sharing
I have friends but not really any in my home town. I think friendless girls are most likely to cheat if things go sour. But as we approach our 30s you naturally have less friends as you get older.
i feel like nowadays 90% of girls are “lazy girls” all they want to do is lay down in bed and watch netflix and scroll tiktok all day
wonderful online dating women
Came down to the comments to write this. Its incredibly rare to meet a girl who has any hobbies that dont include basic life functions.
A lot of girls are like this, I agree. It’s okay to have rest days and relax/take a break but if this is all they do 24/7 I’m sorry but that’s a problem 🤐
Truth.....mostly. Go find a girl in the gym. (That actually works out)
Every girl practically has all 6 of these red flags.
So now we have no choice. Im 26 decent lookin guy currently 5 years single and i feel happy. Never let the women control you.
Am 72
I will give you one advice .Stay away from fire .
Incredibly well articulated: Cold facts yet with kindness. Wholesome.
thank you so much!!!! been dealing with a girl that fits in everysingle category for the las 5 years, this is an eye opener, god bless you and all the ppl in the coments!
I foolishly tried to pursue a girl in my social circle who fit the social media addict persona you described. She never really expressed interest in me in that way and I quickly realized I wasn't missing out when she mentioned that she was having conversations with random married men.
#3....you can tell a lot about somebody by what kind of friends he/she has. Many people are bad influences, or manipulators. But a girl with 'guy' friends is a major red flag, especially if they are older or married. 🚩
#5 is becoming a scary epidemic, reality challenged for sure.
I kind of disagree with the "has no girlfriends" one because im with one and its been the best relationship I've ever had.
Reason why she has no (or extremely low ) friends list is due to people not treating her like a person and not giving her a chance.
People can be awful people for no reason.
Very interesting, not only because it helps identify aspects of recent relationship that were on the wrong side of the road, but also because I can rely on some of the elements there - yes guys can be like this as well (at least some traits)!!
I started the relationship pretty confident, with my life on the side and became gradually lazy, insecure, depressive, with less and less friends time. Needless to say it ended badly. I guess those are not personality traits as much as wounds you need to see, accept, and heal actively. Thanks for the video!
Something I realized just a few years ago:
Most girls don't have hobbies.
This isn't meant as an insult, for some reason most girls I've met are literally hobbyless.
What they like to do is often limited to shopping and traveling which aren't hobbies, literally everybody likes that.
As a guy you need to be their entertainer 24/7 and if you can't be that, they're mad and make you feel guilty
At least those were activities, nowdays it's transitioning to just watching Netflix and be on social media
The insecure girl may not go through your phone while you're sleeping, she may also ask to see you're phone, you say no, and she accuses you right away of trying to hide something from her when all you want is to establish boundaries.
The only time I ever use my fiancee's phone is when mine is on low battery and I want to play Free Cell or Sudoku
I don't show anyone my phone.
Girls who like to drink a lot, that's also a red flag.
Edit: I'm an introvert and I am picky with who I hang out with
How about if she's a stoner
Same here. I'm picky with who I hang out with both women and men. I had girlfriends in my life but they no longer wanted to keep in touch. I don't know if I am the problem or if it's just them. Their choice. If I was a problem they could tell me that.
Courtney your advice is spot on. I am 56 yr old professional and have dated women across the spectrum to include other countries outside the USA.
Enjoying your content.
Thanks
First time subscriber. I love the sound of your voice. It’s calm and soothing. Great information on how to avoid getting into a rocky relationship and just waiting for the right one.
We're not "dating" them. We're practicing on them. They're fun in the one way that is important.
They are NEVER YOURS ,just Your turn.
Never date a girl who has a checklist defining her perfect guy.
There is no perfect guy or a girl. But each girl has her own perfect guy in her head. Everyone has standards and no one can be judged because of it. If you do, you die alone because no one's gonna change this fact
Date a girl who you share dreams and similar values with. She must know her standards in a relationship and knows exactly what she's looking for. High quality men and women are interdependent and are intentional in dating and/or choosing a partner. These are very important to a lasting, valuable, and meaningful relationship, in my opinion.
The Tarzan girl: grabs one tree before letting go of the first-much like the rebound girl but is pre-empting being broken up with (even if said breakup is only in her head)
Dated the attention addict for 6 months. Red flags:
-Phone number not saved, later as an alias of my name
-Doesn't want to be your girlfriend
-Doesn't want to be seen intimate in public spaces
-Asks what I like about her and why I chose for her all the time
-Acts like shes always scattered
And finally like Courtney said, in the beginning shes all over you and at a moment where things will become serious, she starts pulling back and after a while shes completely closes the door on you.
Thank you Courtney! Your advice helped me understand what was going on and realize what person I actually dealt with.
And don't forget, love makes you blind
It's difficult to deal with women whom are suicidal, especially now during covid pandemic. Anyone, regardless of gender. We all suffered trauma from this pandemic in one form or another. The haunted asylum understands. You are not alone. Wish I could help but I am as broke as most people. The diaries of the Black Plague in the 1350s were so sad, it melted my sould reading it during the 2020 early outbreak of covid. Despite all our medical tech, we can't fight a virus in time. I always argued with healthcare, doctors and nurses to stop putting money first, and put human beings first, but to no avail. The haunted asylum has spoken...
5:44 "What does she like to do? Nobody knows."
🤣 Am dead.
Proverbs 27:15 comes to mind if you pick the wrong woman.
Amen!
"What does she like to do? Nobody knows." aka the ones who think liking The Office and tacos is a substitute for a personality.
Simon Yu, I’m a woman and it is the same thing for me. “Tacos! Tacos! Pizza! Where’s the Pam to my Jim?”. Every. Single. Profile.
@@christinapaterno5585 Profile where? on tinder? wtf? try to find real people in real life. social media dating is mostly confidence issued people.
Doctor Ryan. Fantastic information! You have for sure enlighten me with your superb knowledge on the subject. Now, I can think of another example. "The Leach". This type of specimen has a very particular modus operandy. This specimen meets all the qualifications you described as green flags but only temporarily. Once the marriage has been consummated, things start to change slowly but continuously (like boiling a frog). Within a few months, I found myself with a wife that did not want to work anymore, watch TV and spoke on the telephone all day long, wanted to know where I was at all times and expected me to bring dinner on my way from work because she did not have time to hit the kitchen.
Oh the last two items on the list, so so true and as C.S. Lewis once said, "Experience is the most brutal of teachers but you learn, my God, do you learn".
Thank you, Courtney. Best wingwoman I could’ve asked for! You inspire me!
Yes and no to girl #3. I will say that sometimes a super sheltered individual needs a guide to learning how to meet people. Sometimes you can work passed it. Most times run away. Level 5 Cling-on Velcro Girl. I will say I was one of very few partners she ever had. I did end up mentoring her how to build relationships with others. In her case she was willing to work pass her issues. I was patient enough to guide her. Even though yes I had days it was hard on me. And yes at times I had to look past my own resentment towards her. The main difference is, is someone able to think beyond themselves and grow.
I was an introvert whom knew how to socialize.
She was an extrovert that was raised by introverts that just sheltered her more. Now she is this social little butterfly that I lovingly tag along. In that way you drag the old dog to the dog park. Yes he likes it but is perfectly content to be in the yard chewing on sticks.
If I meet a "courtney" in real life, I'm wifeing asap🤣🙏💍
😂😂🥰
Hear that Teddy....
Never judge a book from its cover though...
They are different after getting married, bro. I would advise against it.
I know girls who hop from one relationship to the next and I have no idea how they do it. When I break up with someone I'm single for at least 2-3 years by choice, and I spend that time self reflecting and wondering how I can better myself. The ones who hop just seem to get stuck in some Groundhog Day loop of false happiness and intermittent, imminent misery and because they don't reflect on themselves they end up ruining the next rebound, then the next, and so on in the same way. These people need to learn to love themselves and appreciate their own company more, but they unfortunately never give themselves the chance and need that instant dating dopamine hit. The cycle continues.
I went into this video expecting the worst, but it was actually a good video. Congratulations you’ve won me over 😊