My biggest regret is marrying. It derailed my life in the worst ways. And a divorce at 60 screwed that disaster (and me) permanently to the wall. I lost all belief in, and hope for, humanity. Time for this world to just implode altogether. Hopefully the next generation will learn something from us.
My divorce was finalized 2 hrs ago. At 53, I'm free! Don't give up man, get out there and live your life. Get your body up, get your money up, and treat yourself like no one can. No one treats me better than I treat myself. Don't be discouraged, shake it off and get back in the game. We got a game to win.
I also experienced the same in my late 60s. Ex wife stole all my life savings when i was helping my elderly mom. There was nothing I could do about it as we had joint accounts. She cleaned out my banks. I regret being married for almost 40 yrs only to have everything I believed in destroyed. I am totally alone but doing fine now. Even saving some money. Young men please DON'T get married. Listen to us old veterans of life to save you from destruction.
I was warned not to try to time the market. Lost what is worth $700,000 worth of shares through ignoring that and attempting to do so. Sometimes we dont want to take advice but think we know better. But I tell you what, how many people hold 1/3 a million in Tesla shares AND know how to HOLD it through its volatility AND KNOW its value will be 7x in future? Look for the blessing in disguise.
That's what I'm doing. No relationship, no kids, travel the world diving with sharks. Motorcycles when im back home in Scotland. Keep it simple and have a blast 🦈🏍️
I think there should be a law that says whoever files for the divorce *must* bear the burden of child support and all fees associated with court filings for child support cases. Instead of: “I’m not happy. I’m divorcing this dude and he will be extorted for child support through the DOJ against his will.”
@@JABINVAthen consider it an open relationship, meet other women, start the gym protect your assets, make your women’a life hell, like don’t talk to her, let her do all the chores, go back late at night at home so you wake her up at 3am after having a with another girl etc etc… She will likely get depressed in 1-2 months and will be forced to withdraw for good. We often forget as male we are the builder of our societies, we have the power, women’s job is to make us believe we can’t take it. But the moment you decide to take it back it’s over.
That's why you'd have to put $100 into 2 accounts. Thats what I did for the last 10 years I was married, and it meant one less thing to fight over. I ended up pissing it all away on lawyers and bank stuff anyway, but it was easier than having nothing.
Feelings of regret overshadow gratitude for the life you have had. Grudges and resentments carried forward waste precious energy for no gain. I am married, and that was overall a great decision. We've had our issues, and not every bucket list item is fulfilled, but as my Dad said in his 60s, every day is a bonus day.
We all must strike a balance between the short and long term. We don’t want to pass up opportunities in the moment, as we could die tomorrow; but we also need to prepare for the future, as we could live to the age of 120.
Exercise, worry less, do what matters to me most, be kind to my family, take some risks, be happy in my circumstances, hold on to friends, express gratitude to my loved ones, set boundaries on work, be true to ourselves. All good advice.
Actually prior to the late 70’s, we ate meat, diary, fruits , veggies & grains. We had little no seed oils, trans fats, artificial sweaters & HFCS. Had less heart disease, and obesity & Type 2 diabetes.
John, you have the best audience! Just look at all these wonderful comments that were inspired by you. You provided a fertile ground for seeds of knowledge, to be passed on and to never die. I sincerely believe you have a gift to bring the best people together- because this includes you! (Great video as always!)
Not so sure about reconnecting with people in your past. Not all broken friendships were meant to be restored. People who you thought were friends, were haters in disguise. I have another motto. Those who love and appreciate, who lift you up will be in your lives. And those who were hateful, bad, jealous, selfish, opportunistic and more. They will be sidelined until they change the way they behave around you. Keep giving people the gift of your absence. If they don’t reach out, then your presence never truly mattered to them. And that’s on them, not you. In the meantime, keep surrounding yourselves with people that truly care about you. Keep on investing your time, energy and more into those relationships. In life, you have a chance to form two families. Your blood family and your own family. If they aren’t treating you right, you have every reason to walk away from them. You don’t necessarily have to push away your blood family. But sometimes they are just like those jealous friends. So keeping them at arms length may be the best way to handle them. I think a lot of suicides are directly proportional to how they were mistreated by their own blood family. People can’t seem the fathom that even though you are related, they are still humans and humans have the capacity to cause pain, hurt and suffering. Especially those that are self centred, egoistical, takers, and more.
Accept that your dream might not happen for many years. It could be as much as 20 years before you realize your goal. But in 20 years, you’ll still be here and then your dream is reality.
Good comment & I agree. Sometimes the journey in itself, can also have its own rewards. Take a little pat on the back for every milestone you've achieved on your journey to your dream or objective.
One of the deathbed regrets should be, trying too hard to marry for love. The original and long traditional reason for marriage was mutual, practical, material benefits. We are barely even close friends, but we are good life partners who can depend on each other, and who cherish our very comfortable sanctuary from all the chaos.
At this point, helping others is all that's left. I've experienced much, taken many risks, learned much, still learning. Good discussion today, thank you.
Live life that makes sense to you is my philosophy. Try to make peace in this world to allow the soul to evolve into the next world. I prefer simple life and living more basic in the Matrix based systems. Many chase happiness through consumerism which ends up the things you own end up owning you. Finally try not to take things personally in this world forigve yourself and others and move on.
John in the effort to be the CEO or whatever lofty goals you will not have balance. Because something else always gives. So trying to be extremely successful there is no balance because some other part of your life takes a hit and that is a fact. Great video.
My biggest regret is being 44years old and single all my life by choice after seeing how horrible women were since high school. Never getting married or in a relationship or having kids. Should I be regretting all this?
no, you can marry at 50 or + and 10-15 yr difference upgrade so relax. children still can or adopt a recycle kid and that's quite noble. or just be glad as not having stepped on the land mine to begin with. haha, wait till your 30th HS reunion, whoo, what the heck happened to her? glad she was 'too Busy' last tine i seen her.
No, you dodged a lot of really big regrets...... divorce is not an experience you really want to experience personally. Being jaded is not a good thing either.
Beautiful thoughts. You hit on "Balance," which is something I feel that YOU make the decision what balances you. It's the basis of ancient philosophy ( Zen ). That requires finding an occasional clearing for introspection.Yes, I was the non-stop work horse, giving too much to the wrong people. I looked over my shoulder and the kids were already grown ala "Cat's in the Cradle."
My biggest regret is not recognizing what a huge decision getting married is in a relation to who you marry. I married a woman who had an ocean of red flags… spent 15 years in that marriage, which was a one-way street - everything going to her and nothing for me. Nightmare of a divorce. Will never get married again.
I don't blame you, I made the same mistake. At least we learned what we needed to avoid repeating the same mistakes. Your life will get better, in time.
Yes.. after a year in a dark period for me.. I started a business… now, 14 years later I’m 58, financially independent.. retired early 5 years ago.. traveling.. never been happier!!!
What a concise summary that helps to focus on what matters. My pastor says we leak and need to go to the well often to be reminded and fulfilled. John, thank you for your TH-cam well…
John, could you make a video about kids ? I am 33 and never want to get married but i feel my life will be meaningless if i never have kids. Other aspects of my life are prettyy good
Incredibly young looking as you can see, I’m 76 never been married never had or wanted children One problem will be that your best friend’s wives will crowbar you out. I don’t want a single man near their husbands so watch out for that one.
I am a 61-year-old male (only child), retired and never married. I live in the US. I get depressed a lot and wish I had met someone when I was younger, but I do have my freedom and autonomy that allows me to pursue my hobbies and interests freely and my financial decisions are mine to make. It would have been nice to have had a family, but I do recognize that the divorce rate is off the charts and the size of the MGTOW movement is really incredible. I guess not ever having been married certainly is not the worst thing in the world, considering the situation in western society. The one thing I don't get though is that they say that 65% of young men are not even dating these days, but I still see quite a few young people getting married and having families. Any thoughts on any of this? Thanks!
We all tend to regret not having done this, or that, always assuming our lives would have turned out better if we had. I'm here to tell you that this is not always the case. I often tell others to be careful what they wish for, because they just may get it, only to find out it was nothing like they had hoped or dreamed.
My parents are divorced as am I. I can tell you first hand marriages often look very different to everyone else than to those within those marriages. A lot of marriages that look happy to outsiders are anything but to the parties involved in them. Your autonomy and freedom are more valuable than you know.....until you no longer have either one. Yes they come at a price, everything does. The grass is often not greener on the other side of the fence.
Save your time! Thanksgiving Reflection: Speaker reflects on Thanksgiving's past meaninglessness, contrasting it with Halloween and Christmas. Growing older shifted perspective; Thanksgiving gained significance. Hospice Insights: Speaker discusses insights gleaned from hospice nurse Julie's TH-cam channel, focusing on deathbed regrets. These regrets inform the video's core message. Top 10 Deathbed Regrets: The video details ten common regrets from people nearing death. #10 Poor Self-Care: Lack of proper diet and exercise leading to chronic illnesses (heart disease, cancer). Solution: healthy diet (fruits, vegetables, grains, beans, low saturated fat) and regular exercise (walking, weightlifting). #9 Excessive Worrying: Worrying about future events wastes time and energy. Solution: stay present; deal with issues when they arise. #8 Unpursued Dreams: Regret for not pursuing personal goals and passions. Solution: identify dreams, plan, and act; "don't die with your music inside." #7 Family Neglect: Insufficient attention and love given to family (children, parents, grandchildren). Solution: express appreciation, forgive, and cherish relationships. #6 Lack of Risk-Taking: Regret for not taking chances and experiencing life fully. Solution: step outside comfort zone; embrace risks and potential rewards. #5 Self-Denial of Happiness: Regret for not allowing oneself to be happy, believing happiness is externally sourced. Solution: cultivate appreciation and gratitude for present circumstances. #4 Lost Friendships: Regret for losing touch with friends over time. Solution: reconnect with old friends despite past issues. #3 Unexpressed Feelings: Regret for not expressing gratitude and love to loved ones. Solution: express emotions and appreciation, even if uncomfortable. #2 Overwork: Regret for working excessively, neglecting other life aspects. Solution: balance work with family, personal interests, and well-being. #1 Lack of Self-Truth: Regret for not living authentically, conforming to others' expectations. Solution: live life according to personal values and desires; reject societal pressures. Concluding Message: The video urges viewers to prioritize self-care, pursue dreams, cherish relationships, take risks, find happiness, reconnect with friends, express feelings, balance work and life, and live authentically.
I always felt i had to have kids, as do most people, like you’re not in the elite club if you don’t. Then a friend of mine once said who had an adult son who was kind and successful, he told me kids are overrated. It made me realize that we don’t have to have kids, we are just made to feel that we do ! Just be happy in your own way!
My dad always dreamed of living on a sailboat and cruising around the world. He eventually moved to a place on the bay, but passed away several years later and never lived his dream. I love to explore, and as a result, I travel as much as possible to see the world. My dad's dream was the motivation of my youtube name "The Global Vagabond" Time waits for no body.
Same here, been traveling on and off on a cat, it's a great experience. Did the Bahamas for 2yrs with my ex. Don't want to go alone. Bought another one a year ago, it's just sitting. I've made some interesting decisions since the divorce. Trying to get my shit together......lol.......some days great, others not so much. Women are F----Ing NUTS, ALL OF THEM!!!!!!
Not your typical "Alpha-Creator" nonsense from guys that barely even had a long term relationship... Thanks a lot, John. 👍 My biggest regret: Moving to an unfamiliar city, knowing deep inside, that my marriage was fu... already. Damn, that was stupid! 😮
Im only putting it off because of finances, it sucks because I know exactly what I want to do, but I need to meet with people in a certain industry to do so. The industry is in a different state. I've been trying to save for years, and it is all but impossible these days
Geez, I already have eight out ten regrets and I'm not on my deathbed. Maybe it's time to find that bed. 😮 Actually, thinking about it more, taking chances and finding happiness; I got married and am now getting divorced. So I guess I've covered those two regrets as well. I wish I wouldn't have risked getting married because now I have to face the risk of divorce court which does not sound like a risk that has any prospect of good. Finding happiness, maybe that will come after divorce and I can be rid of all her drama and hate. Maybe find peace and quiet. Yup, that just might give me some happiness... 😅😂😂 On the other hand, maybe it's time to go bed shopping as I don't really have enough years left to undo the other regrets. Plus, my family's all gone, so that's a regret that can't be undone. 😮
Late seeing your video. Well billionaire, divorced Larry Ellison, 70 years old with his recent wife N. Khan, 33 years old has no regrets. Larry Ellison facelift went well 😂 and he looks good.......... Stay healthy guys
Comment Number 320. On 1. Not being true to yourself. Some teachers are disastrous. "They take the best years of your life. Try to tell you wring from right. But, you walk away with nothing." -- written by Bryan Adams and Jim Vallance. 40 years 🎂 ago in the movie 🎥 Teachers. 6. Be risky. 8 You do not want to die with your music in you. Me: I tie 👔 both of these traits together. I took a risks in 2022: flying to The Philippines 🇵🇭. And I did not let the music in me die before the trip. I did karaoke 🎤 many times. I lost 😞 in the contests. But, the Filipinos taught me to singer better and have better stage presence. I never learned as much about both in Canada 🇨🇦 or in the USA 🇺🇸. Bonus. I got into a deep dive into commercial music from Asia 🌏. I took a deeper dive into Original Philippine Music (OPM), from A (Morissette Amon) to Z (Zephanie Dimaranan). Thus, saving money 💰, putting on My Brave Face (as Sir Paul McCartney and Elvis Costello pointed out 35 years ago 🎂 ) and taking the risk of embarrassment in front of 100 or so people in a foreign nation! Happy 😊 life moments.
So after reading some of the comments before even watching the video... currently at 30 years old it seems like the best thing to do is to avoid marriage altogether and stack my money lol I work out 4 times a week (I run at least 40 miles a week) and I eat as healthy as possible (with some cheat meals of course).
I’m the middle child of my family and if anyone knows what that entails, most of us don’t have a good relationship with our families. Being sandwiched where the eldest child got all of the attention and the youngest got all of the resources. Due to years of neglect and making to feel like we didn’t belonged. Middle children basically had to parent themselves. We are probably the most independent of our family. Most disconnected aswell. That’s something the eldest and youngest child will never understand. Growing up, feeling like we didn’t mattered, didn’t get enough love, attention or being heard and understood from our family members. As an adult, we became who we were truly meant to be. Heard and understood by others. Us middle children end up becoming really good friends with other middle child and life long friends with those who were the only child. I look back now and realise this as a fact. If you appreciate your middle child or sibling, please show them more compassion and love. All they wanted was to be heard and understood.
Great post - @63 where I grew up families had 5+ kids including mine (7kids) and everything you said is right on. I was the neglected middle child, one summer during high school I left home for a 3 week summer job and when I returned my mother looked at me and said: honey have you been away? That’s the moment I learned I was not special & my existence was probably an accident.
@john-griffin Well I did not give any insight on why, but the short form: Shallow people backstabbing each other for peanuts (on a local level) and if your social circle is intertwined with the party, you will notice that they can only talk about politics, nothing else and leaving the party is not taken lightly.
Ive never worked out in my life > im not over weight more less skinny fat, how much weight would you recommend someone like me to begin with? Im in my 40's, and any certain things To do?
@MX-CO_that is a big question. Get to a good gym that is not to busy and close to where you live. Start with 3 times a week weight lifting and up it to 4 then if you can 5 times a week. You need to include compound exercises like bench press, squats/leg press ect... Diet needs high protein, low fat and carbs that are brown rice/pasta not fries Scratching surface here, biiiigggg question
That’s a very good answer! I agree with everything you said. The key is to work out your form first. Maybe work with the Trainer for a couple of sessions that you can get the hang of it. Then just progressively challenged yourself.
I think most people do what they do because that's what they want to do. And if anyone has regrets on their death bed its only because they never acted on those things because they didn't want to. So no regrets.
Do what you like to do...and are good at...and the money will follow. Everyone has a gift...don't piss it away! Check out a story from, I think, 2015......18yr old vocational school....The $140,000 a yr Welder.....both parents college proffs....they supported him in opting against college......started out making more than both parents combined
You need to do some research on what is a healthy diet. I am 73. I have not seen my primary doctor or dentist in 7 years. I eat a 100% animal based diet. There is not a single esential carb.
That’s great. There are genetic differences for some people that allow them to manage cholesterol better than others. I wish you the very best. Good luck making it to 80.
It might be a good idea to visit your doctor and order up a blood panel. It'll show you exactly where things stand now....and where you can make adjustments if something's getting/gotten out of whack. Cost is less than $200, they'll call you with results in a day or so. Or, they may offer a free patient portal so you can see/analyze results online. That way you don't have to try to remember all info in the phone call. Also, no harm done to keep an eye on your blood pressure....those cuff monitors less that $40 bucks Wallg or cvs. Hopefully everything is fine....or if not, maybe you can dodge a bullet. At least you'll have facts to work with...
Watching an old boy painting his boat, I asked him why don’t you say out to France or somewhere? He replied when I was young I didn’t have the time now I’m old. I have the money but not the strength.
Teu canal é um dos mais coerentes na minha opinião. Já consumi bastante Red Pill, Black Pill, mas teu conteúdo parece mais verossímil. Estou conhecendo uma garota, a primeira de depois do meu casamento de 15 anos com uma borderline. Como posso conciliar a dica número 1 com os relacionamentos com as mulheres? Pois se eu for muito verdadeiro, temo ficar muito exposto e vulnerável.
I think the key is to be your authentic self and not allow yourself to get pulled into trying to be someone that you’re not in order to win her favor. I think a lot of men are very afraid of being their authentic selves with women for fear that they’ll be rejected. If you’re pretending to be someone and you get rejected, you don’t feel quite so bad. Just be your authentic self and know the kind of things that are important to you and what kind of things you’re unwilling to compromise on. Those things boundaries and make it clear when she approaches those things that they are unacceptable. But just do it in a polite and kind way. If you remain authentic to yourself, you can have a healthy relationship with a woman. I think too often times men compromise on their values in order to win a woman over. Good luck and thank you.
Good point... I remember those....the long legged blonde....the cute little thing with jet black hair....the other blonde....and one or two more...what a dumb-ass was I...!!
Thanksgiving has always been my favorite holiday. There's none of the material bullshit of Christmas. The focus is to be on being thankful (to God, if you are into that) and family and friends. I have little interest in the other holidays of barbecues and boating like Memorial Day and Labor Day. I wouldn't miss 9 of the 10 holidays if they disappeared.
Memorial Day is about Honoring Fallen US Soldiers and Sailors. Unfortunately Retail hijacked it and the public followed. I always make it a point to watch a WW2 movie, and give thanks my Dad didn't die in the Pacific before I was born.
For most men in my family this is not the case. I only know of one who loves his job and even him it is because he worked in the fields and the welded on sky scrapers when he was young until he got a job in sales.
My biggest regret was getting married. After 25 years of marriage, I became the victim of a brutal grey divorce where she got all the cash and prizes. Hypergamy kicked in.. she was bored and found a shiny new toy that moved into MY HOUSE before the ink was dry on the papers. I have nothing for retirement and will be forced to live in a low income apartment or in my van when I retire. Marriage is at an all time low and whoever is left are getting divorced at an accelerated rate. The birth rate in many countries has also plummeted. Gentlemen ... do not get married and stay single.... better yet.... Go MGTOW Monk and set yourself free.
I quit eating meat and all animal based products and never felt better. Too much research showing that meat is linked to cancers like colon cancer. Do not call someone who decides to eat a whole food plant based diet crazy. Plant based protein can build muscle as well. The only thing we lack is B-12 which a supplement can fix.
"That word 'should' should be banned from the English language...." Maybe that could have been expressed a little better.... Using the word 'should' (properly) in a sentence that argues for its banning is a little bit paradoxical! And in a section tagged as No "Shoulds".....
A big one, invest your money, the boomers had real estate but millennials like myself with no real estate, bitcoin is the only way we will retire with dignity.
Heathy diet has been taught to me since i was born because i am french. The problem with diet is that it is very difficult to change habits witch where implanted since childhood. Especially when culture is very poor on food like it is in the USA. The basis for healthy diet is basicaly to eat raw food and Cook your own meals. I have noticed that in the USA most poeple can not afford to buy raw food ( meat, fruits, vegetables) because it is very expansive. As a french man i spend a lot of money on healthy ( normal for me) food. But i don t have the choice because eating american processed food makes me sick and depressed.
My biggest regret is marrying. It derailed my life in the worst ways. And a divorce at 60 screwed that disaster (and me) permanently to the wall. I lost all belief in, and hope for, humanity. Time for this world to just implode altogether. Hopefully the next generation will learn something from us.
My divorce was finalized 2 hrs ago. At 53, I'm free! Don't give up man, get out there and live your life. Get your body up, get your money up, and treat yourself like no one can. No one treats me better than I treat myself. Don't be discouraged, shake it off and get back in the game. We got a game to win.
All for in house pxssy
@jakesdekker7503 awesome, I have some dreams and goals but I'm struggling to accomplish anything with the $18 dollars an hour I currently make
I also experienced the same in my late 60s. Ex wife stole all my life savings when i was helping my elderly mom. There was nothing I could do about it as we had joint accounts. She cleaned out my banks. I regret being married for almost 40 yrs only to have everything I believed in destroyed. I am totally alone but doing fine now. Even saving some money. Young men please DON'T get married. Listen to us old veterans of life to save you from destruction.
I was warned not to try to time the market. Lost what is worth $700,000 worth of shares through ignoring that and attempting to do so. Sometimes we dont want to take advice but think we know better. But I tell you what, how many people hold 1/3 a million in Tesla shares AND know how to HOLD it through its volatility AND KNOW its value will be 7x in future? Look for the blessing in disguise.
Exercise is not only good for your body, it’s great for your mind.
Physical health and mental health are the same. Your brain is part of your body
@@Savvynomad225Mind and brain are not the same thing.
@@Alex.Kalashnik no relationship at all?
Pursue your dreams. Don’t die with your music in you.
That's what I'm doing. No relationship, no kids, travel the world diving with sharks. Motorcycles when im back home in Scotland. Keep it simple and have a blast 🦈🏍️
I think there should be a law that says whoever files for the divorce *must* bear the burden of child support and all fees associated with court filings for child support cases.
Instead of:
“I’m not happy. I’m divorcing this dude and he will be extorted for child support through the DOJ against his will.”
Only problem is I filed for divorce because my ex cheated.
@@JABINVAthen consider it an open relationship, meet other women, start the gym protect your assets, make your women’a life hell, like don’t talk to her, let her do all the chores, go back late at night at home so you wake her up at 3am after having a with another girl etc etc…
She will likely get depressed in 1-2 months and will be forced to withdraw for good.
We often forget as male we are the builder of our societies, we have the power, women’s job is to make us believe we can’t take it. But the moment you decide to take it back it’s over.
@@JABINVA what's good for the goose is good for the gander
My biggest regret is not putting $100 a month into retirement, but my only other regret would have taken half of it in the divorce.
That's why you'd have to put $100 into 2 accounts. Thats what I did for the last 10 years I was married, and it meant one less thing to fight over.
I ended up pissing it all away on lawyers and bank stuff anyway, but it was easier than having nothing.
Feelings of regret overshadow gratitude for the life you have had. Grudges and resentments carried forward waste precious energy for no gain. I am married, and that was overall a great decision. We've had our issues, and not every bucket list item is fulfilled, but as my Dad said in his 60s, every day is a bonus day.
We all must strike a balance between the short and long term. We don’t want to pass up opportunities in the moment, as we could die tomorrow; but we also need to prepare for the future, as we could live to the age of 120.
Great point
Yes sir I'm long running for 117. Dumbshits have been laughing at me for years.
Yeah, find the balance between stability and adventure.
Exercise, worry less, do what matters to me most, be kind to my family, take some risks, be happy in my circumstances, hold on to friends, express gratitude to my loved ones, set boundaries on work, be true to ourselves. All good advice.
Or ditch friends that bring you down….thats a biggy.
If I don't have any regrets, I'll have nothing to hold onto.
Best possible life!
If you listen to Alan Watts, and the buddist philosophy, there is nothing to hang on to anyways. So don't!
Actually prior to the late 70’s, we ate meat, diary, fruits , veggies & grains. We had little no seed oils, trans fats, artificial sweaters & HFCS. Had less heart disease, and obesity & Type 2 diabetes.
John, you have the best audience! Just look at all these wonderful comments that were inspired by you. You provided a fertile ground for seeds of knowledge, to be passed on and to never die. I sincerely believe you have a gift to bring the best people together- because this includes you! (Great video as always!)
A very thought provoking video! Thanks John!
I’m glad it was helpful!
Not so sure about reconnecting with people in your past. Not all broken friendships were meant to be restored. People who you thought were friends, were haters in disguise.
I have another motto. Those who love and appreciate, who lift you up will be in your lives. And those who were hateful, bad, jealous, selfish, opportunistic and more. They will be sidelined until they change the way they behave around you. Keep giving people the gift of your absence. If they don’t reach out, then your presence never truly mattered to them. And that’s on them, not you.
In the meantime, keep surrounding yourselves with people that truly care about you. Keep on investing your time, energy and more into those relationships. In life, you have a chance to form two families. Your blood family and your own family. If they aren’t treating you right, you have every reason to walk away from them.
You don’t necessarily have to push away your blood family. But sometimes they are just like those jealous friends. So keeping them at arms length may be the best way to handle them.
I think a lot of suicides are directly proportional to how they were mistreated by their own blood family. People can’t seem the fathom that even though you are related, they are still humans and humans have the capacity to cause pain, hurt and suffering. Especially those that are self centred, egoistical, takers, and more.
I agree with you, except I know we can never truly know who truly cares about us. Things are not always as they seem.
Well said !
Accept that your dream might not happen for many years. It could be as much as 20 years before you realize your goal. But in 20 years, you’ll still be here and then your dream is reality.
Good comment & I agree. Sometimes the journey in itself, can also have its own rewards. Take a little pat on the back for every milestone you've achieved on your journey to your dream or objective.
Great video John, this should have more views.
One of the deathbed regrets should be, trying too hard to marry for love. The original and long traditional reason for marriage was mutual, practical, material benefits. We are barely even close friends, but we are good life partners who can depend on each other, and who cherish our very comfortable sanctuary from all the chaos.
Eliminate all highly processed foods....foods with chemicals, additives...
I know about risk taking. I’ve stretched my luck a few times, and it was never without stress, but I was rewarded more often than not.
I second this. 👍🏼
Completely agree.
I work in hospice most people are out of it by the very end. I almost never hear regrets.
So the truth comes out...... By somebody who has experience
In truth, is this because they are so drugged up by big pharma that they cannot express themselves or stay coherent? Morphine is a hell of a drug...
Worry is like a rocking chair. It will give you something to do but it won’t get you anywhere.
At this point, helping others is all that's left. I've experienced much, taken many risks, learned much, still learning. Good discussion today, thank you.
Live life that makes sense to you is my philosophy. Try to make peace in this world to allow the soul to evolve into the next world. I prefer simple life and living more basic in the Matrix based systems. Many chase happiness through consumerism which ends up the things you own end up owning you. Finally try not to take things personally in this world forigve yourself and others and move on.
I wholeheartedly agree.
Worry is the interest you are paying on money you haven't borrowed yet.
John in the effort to be the CEO or whatever lofty goals you will not have balance. Because something else always gives. So trying to be extremely successful there is no balance because some other part of your life takes a hit and that is a fact. Great video.
My biggest regret is being 44years old and single all my life by choice after seeing how horrible women were since high school. Never getting married or in a relationship or having kids. Should I be regretting all this?
no, you can marry at 50 or + and 10-15 yr difference upgrade so relax. children still can or adopt a recycle kid and that's quite noble. or just be glad as not having stepped on the land mine to begin with. haha, wait till your 30th HS reunion, whoo, what the heck happened to her? glad she was 'too Busy' last tine i seen her.
No, you dodged a lot of really big regrets...... divorce is not an experience you really want to experience personally. Being jaded is not a good thing either.
@taras3702 thank you. But I didn't achieve anything?
@@Rambo-lv9hu Well then....set yourself a goal and achieve it....
Beautiful thoughts. You hit on "Balance," which is something I feel that YOU make the decision what balances you. It's the basis of ancient philosophy ( Zen ). That requires finding an occasional clearing for introspection.Yes, I was the non-stop work horse, giving too much to the wrong people. I looked over my shoulder and the kids were already grown ala "Cat's in the Cradle."
That's a great perspective! Thanks
Excellent vid John & at 49 now so important.
Glad you enjoyed it
My biggest regret is not recognizing what a huge decision getting married is in a relation to who you marry. I married a woman who had an ocean of red flags… spent 15 years in that marriage, which was a one-way street - everything going to her and nothing for me. Nightmare of a divorce. Will never get married again.
I don't blame you, I made the same mistake. At least we learned what we needed to avoid repeating the same mistakes. Your life will get better, in time.
Yes.. after a year in a dark period for me.. I started a business… now, 14 years later I’m 58, financially independent.. retired early 5 years ago.. traveling.. never been happier!!!
Thanks, John.
What a concise summary that helps to focus on what matters. My pastor says we leak and need to go to the well often to be reminded and fulfilled.
John, thank you for your TH-cam well…
I appreciate your comment! Thank you
John, could you make a video about kids ? I am 33 and never want to get married but i feel my life will be meaningless if i never have kids. Other aspects of my life are prettyy good
Incredibly young looking as you can see, I’m 76 never been married never had or wanted children
One problem will be that your best friend’s wives will crowbar you out. I don’t want a single man near their husbands so watch out for that one.
You may well become lonely solve that with Pets and healthy activities
I am a 61-year-old male (only child), retired and never married. I live in the US. I get depressed a lot and wish I had met someone when I was younger, but I do have my freedom and autonomy that allows me to pursue my hobbies and interests freely and my financial decisions are mine to make. It would have been nice to have had a family, but I do recognize that the divorce rate is off the charts and the size of the MGTOW movement is really incredible. I guess not ever having been married certainly is not the worst thing in the world, considering the situation in western society. The one thing I don't get though is that they say that 65% of young men are not even dating these days, but I still see quite a few young people getting married and having families. Any thoughts on any of this? Thanks!
Grass is always greener on the other side. At least you have your freedom, that's worth it's weight in gold. If you were married you'd have none 👍🏻
We all tend to regret not having done this, or that, always assuming our lives would have turned out better if we had. I'm here to tell you that this is not always the case. I often tell others to be careful what they wish for, because they just may get it, only to find out it was nothing like they had hoped or dreamed.
Very few men are dating and marrying. We have no chance
My parents are divorced as am I. I can tell you first hand marriages often look very different to everyone else than to those within those marriages. A lot of marriages that look happy to outsiders are anything but to the parties involved in them. Your autonomy and freedom are more valuable than you know.....until you no longer have either one. Yes they come at a price, everything does. The grass is often not greener on the other side of the fence.
@@taras3702 thank you for this reminder, enjoy my freedom!
14:54 My first job was in 1980. Now at 60 years of life, - aside from my 25 years as a teacher, the rest was purely trading time for money.
Your videos are very well done and well spoken
Love your videos and channel John!
Once a loved ones gone due to illness or just old age all we have left is old photos and memories of good times or bad ones
Save your time!
Thanksgiving Reflection: Speaker reflects on Thanksgiving's past meaninglessness, contrasting it with Halloween and Christmas. Growing older shifted perspective; Thanksgiving gained significance.
Hospice Insights: Speaker discusses insights gleaned from hospice nurse Julie's TH-cam channel, focusing on deathbed regrets. These regrets inform the video's core message.
Top 10 Deathbed Regrets: The video details ten common regrets from people nearing death.
#10 Poor Self-Care: Lack of proper diet and exercise leading to chronic illnesses (heart disease, cancer). Solution: healthy diet (fruits, vegetables, grains, beans, low saturated fat) and regular exercise (walking, weightlifting).
#9 Excessive Worrying: Worrying about future events wastes time and energy. Solution: stay present; deal with issues when they arise.
#8 Unpursued Dreams: Regret for not pursuing personal goals and passions. Solution: identify dreams, plan, and act; "don't die with your music inside."
#7 Family Neglect: Insufficient attention and love given to family (children, parents, grandchildren). Solution: express appreciation, forgive, and cherish relationships.
#6 Lack of Risk-Taking: Regret for not taking chances and experiencing life fully. Solution: step outside comfort zone; embrace risks and potential rewards.
#5 Self-Denial of Happiness: Regret for not allowing oneself to be happy, believing happiness is externally sourced. Solution: cultivate appreciation and gratitude for present circumstances.
#4 Lost Friendships: Regret for losing touch with friends over time. Solution: reconnect with old friends despite past issues.
#3 Unexpressed Feelings: Regret for not expressing gratitude and love to loved ones. Solution: express emotions and appreciation, even if uncomfortable.
#2 Overwork: Regret for working excessively, neglecting other life aspects. Solution: balance work with family, personal interests, and well-being.
#1 Lack of Self-Truth: Regret for not living authentically, conforming to others' expectations. Solution: live life according to personal values and desires; reject societal pressures.
Concluding Message: The video urges viewers to prioritize self-care, pursue dreams, cherish relationships, take risks, find happiness, reconnect with friends, express feelings, balance work and life, and live authentically.
I hope I will not regret not having kids.
Go to a sperm bank. You may not get to know your offspring but there is solace knowing they are there.
Go to a sperm bank. You will probably not get to know your offspring but there is true solace knowing they are there and your bloodline will continue.
I always felt i had to have kids, as do most people, like you’re not in the elite club if you don’t.
Then a friend of mine once said who had an adult son who was kind and successful, he told me kids are overrated.
It made me realize that we don’t have to have kids, we are just made to feel that we do ! Just be happy in your own way!
getting to make the "declarations" a blessing really. many never get to
Great topic . Very timely. Life is meant to be enjoyed. If not, you're doing something wrong.
@@Richard-v4s4y well said
John, I love your videos, I was curious what drone you’re using for your shots to track you as you walk. Thanks for all you do!
Thanks for what you do brother
Thanks for your support!
I’m 76 and I’m 10 for 10. No regrets.
My dad always dreamed of living on a sailboat and cruising around the world. He eventually moved to a place on the bay, but passed away several years later and never lived his dream. I love to explore, and as a result, I travel as much as possible to see the world. My dad's dream was the motivation of my youtube name "The Global Vagabond" Time waits for no body.
That's a wonderful tribute to your dad. Living the life he always wanted is an excellent way to honor his memory.
Same here, been traveling on and off on a cat, it's a great experience. Did the Bahamas for 2yrs with my ex. Don't want to go alone. Bought another one a year ago, it's just sitting. I've made some interesting decisions since the divorce. Trying to get my shit together......lol.......some days great, others not so much.
Women are F----Ing NUTS, ALL OF THEM!!!!!!
Great video
A great book to read: The Top Five Regrets of the Dying by Bronnie Ware.
Not your typical "Alpha-Creator" nonsense from guys that barely even had a long term relationship...
Thanks a lot, John. 👍
My biggest regret:
Moving to an unfamiliar city, knowing deep inside, that my marriage was fu... already. Damn, that was stupid! 😮
My biggest regret has to also be that I got married because I was told that is how I should live my life - ties in to the number 1 regret on the list.
I’ve worked hard all my life, but I’m eagerly planning my early retirement as a result.
Great plan!
Thanks I need to her this.
One of your best videos, noce job
I’m glad you liked it!
Im only putting it off because of finances, it sucks because I know exactly what I want to do, but I need to meet with people in a certain industry to do so. The industry is in a different state. I've been trying to save for years, and it is all but impossible these days
Geez, I already have eight out ten regrets and I'm not on my deathbed. Maybe it's time to find that bed. 😮 Actually, thinking about it more, taking chances and finding happiness; I got married and am now getting divorced. So I guess I've covered those two regrets as well. I wish I wouldn't have risked getting married because now I have to face the risk of divorce court which does not sound like a risk that has any prospect of good. Finding happiness, maybe that will come after divorce and I can be rid of all her drama and hate. Maybe find peace and quiet. Yup, that just might give me some happiness... 😅😂😂
On the other hand, maybe it's time to go bed shopping as I don't really have enough years left to undo the other regrets. Plus, my family's all gone, so that's a regret that can't be undone. 😮
Late seeing your video. Well billionaire, divorced Larry Ellison, 70 years old with his recent wife N. Khan, 33 years old has no regrets. Larry Ellison facelift went well 😂 and he looks good.......... Stay healthy guys
@@dews3340 money is king
Ellison seems to be the real McCoy....stumbled a number of times in biz....you might enjoy a book involving him...The Billionaire and the Mechanic
@reedmartin6614 thanks for sharing this timely information
Comment Number 320. On 1. Not being true to yourself. Some teachers are disastrous. "They take the best years of your life. Try to tell you wring from right. But, you walk away with nothing." -- written by Bryan Adams and Jim Vallance. 40 years 🎂 ago in the movie 🎥 Teachers. 6. Be risky. 8 You do not want to die with your music in you. Me: I tie 👔 both of these traits together. I took a risks in 2022: flying to The Philippines 🇵🇭. And I did not let the music in me die before the trip. I did karaoke 🎤 many times. I lost 😞 in the contests. But, the Filipinos taught me to singer better and have better stage presence. I never learned as much about both in Canada 🇨🇦 or in the USA 🇺🇸.
Bonus. I got into a deep dive into commercial music from Asia 🌏. I took a deeper dive into Original Philippine Music (OPM), from A (Morissette Amon) to Z (Zephanie Dimaranan). Thus, saving money 💰, putting on My Brave Face (as Sir Paul McCartney and Elvis Costello pointed out 35 years ago 🎂 ) and taking the risk of embarrassment in front of 100 or so people in a foreign nation! Happy 😊 life moments.
Thanks
@john-griffin 😊
So after reading some of the comments before even watching the video... currently at 30 years old it seems like the best thing to do is to avoid marriage altogether and stack my money lol I work out 4 times a week (I run at least 40 miles a week) and I eat as healthy as possible (with some cheat meals of course).
I’m the middle child of my family and if anyone knows what that entails, most of us don’t have a good relationship with our families.
Being sandwiched where the eldest child got all of the attention and the youngest got all of the resources. Due to years of neglect and making to feel like we didn’t belonged.
Middle children basically had to parent themselves. We are probably the most independent of our family. Most disconnected aswell.
That’s something the eldest and youngest child will never understand.
Growing up, feeling like we didn’t mattered, didn’t get enough love, attention or being heard and understood from our family members. As an adult, we became who we were truly meant to be. Heard and understood by others.
Us middle children end up becoming really good friends with other middle child and life long friends with those who were the only child.
I look back now and realise this as a fact. If you appreciate your middle child or sibling, please show them more compassion and love. All they wanted was to be heard and understood.
The farse of psychology ruined one too many middle children
Great post - @63 where I grew up families had 5+ kids including mine (7kids) and everything you said is right on. I was the neglected middle child, one summer during high school I left home for a 3 week summer job and when I returned my mother looked at me and said: honey have you been away? That’s the moment I learned I was not special & my existence was probably an accident.
I am not on my deathbed thankfully, but my biggest regret in life so far is joining and being active in a political party.
@@NeiyMaritz great insight
@john-griffin Well I did not give any insight on why, but the short form: Shallow people backstabbing each other for peanuts (on a local level) and if your social circle is intertwined with the party, you will notice that they can only talk about politics, nothing else and leaving the party is not taken lightly.
@@NeiyMaritz
I have become nonpartisan also. Politics is violence to those who think differently than the winners.
If for the right party as of late I thank you
@@NeiyMaritzsounds cult-like
Ive never worked out in my life > im not over weight more less skinny fat, how much weight would you recommend someone like me to begin with?
Im in my 40's, and any certain things To do?
@MX-CO_that is a big question. Get to a good gym that is not to busy and close to where you live.
Start with 3 times a week weight lifting and up it to 4 then if you can 5 times a week.
You need to include compound exercises like bench press, squats/leg press ect...
Diet needs high protein, low fat and carbs that are brown rice/pasta not fries
Scratching surface here, biiiigggg question
That’s a very good answer! I agree with everything you said. The key is to work out your form first. Maybe work with the Trainer for a couple of sessions that you can get the hang of it. Then just progressively challenged yourself.
Mine too, marrying my ex was easily the worst mistake I had ever made. At least I left at the age of 35, before kids came along.
The main thing to avoid is regret itself. Things couldn't have been any different.
I think most people do what they do because that's what they want to do. And if anyone has regrets on their death bed its only because they never acted on those things because they didn't want to. So no regrets.
It's too late for any of us to "regret" anything. No regerts.
$$$$$$$$$ is preventing me from doing everything I want to do
@@MX-CO u need to make the right sacrifices to do what you want to do...or maybe you already made choices that restrict your true dreams?
Do what you like to do...and are good at...and the money will follow.
Everyone has a gift...don't piss it away!
Check out a story from, I think, 2015......18yr old vocational school....The $140,000 a yr Welder.....both parents college proffs....they supported him in opting against college......started out making more than both parents combined
@@reedmartin6614 yes many ways to make money!
You need to do some research on what is a healthy diet. I am 73. I have not seen my primary doctor or dentist in 7 years. I eat a 100% animal based diet. There is not a single esential carb.
That’s great. There are genetic differences for some people that allow them to manage cholesterol better than others. I wish you the very best. Good luck making it to 80.
@@john-griffin
Dr. Anthony Chaffee - 'Plants are trying to kill you!'
th-cam.com/video/j1cqNDDG4aA/w-d-xo.html
What about the eskimos who eat only meat
It might be a good idea to visit your doctor and order up a blood panel. It'll show you exactly where things stand now....and where you can make adjustments if something's getting/gotten out of whack.
Cost is less than $200, they'll call you with results in a day or so. Or, they may offer a free patient portal so you can see/analyze results online. That way you don't have to try to remember all info in the phone call.
Also, no harm done to keep an eye on your blood pressure....those cuff monitors less that $40 bucks Wallg or cvs.
Hopefully everything is fine....or if not, maybe you can dodge a bullet. At least you'll have facts to work with...
Sucks that you started the ads... Esp in the middle of the video...
My best years were used up on a Narcissist wife and dating after divorce, I'm making up for it now by staying single
Read the book , think and grow rich!
Watching an old boy painting his boat, I asked him why don’t you say out to France or somewhere?
He replied when I was young I didn’t have the time now I’m old. I have the money but not the strength.
Forgot to mention, yes, he had the money yes he had the time, but he was as weak as a kitten and it was too late
Regrets period
Teu canal é um dos mais coerentes na minha opinião. Já consumi bastante Red Pill, Black Pill, mas teu conteúdo parece mais verossímil. Estou conhecendo uma garota, a primeira de depois do meu casamento de 15 anos com uma borderline. Como posso conciliar a dica número 1 com os relacionamentos com as mulheres? Pois se eu for muito verdadeiro, temo ficar muito exposto e vulnerável.
I think the key is to be your authentic self and not allow yourself to get pulled into trying to be someone that you’re not in order to win her favor. I think a lot of men are very afraid of being their authentic selves with women for fear that they’ll be rejected. If you’re pretending to be someone and you get rejected, you don’t feel quite so bad. Just be your authentic self and know the kind of things that are important to you and what kind of things you’re unwilling to compromise on. Those things boundaries and make it clear when she approaches those things that they are unacceptable. But just do it in a polite and kind way. If you remain authentic to yourself, you can have a healthy relationship with a woman. I think too often times men compromise on their values in order to win a woman over. Good luck and thank you.
@john-griffin Thanks a Lot.
This list seems censored. I think what people regret is passing up opportunities to get laid.
Good point... I remember those....the long legged blonde....the cute
little thing with jet black hair....the other blonde....and one or two more...what a dumb-ass was I...!!
Thanksgiving has always been my favorite holiday. There's none of the material bullshit of Christmas. The focus is to be on being thankful (to God, if you are into that) and family and friends. I have little interest in the other holidays of barbecues and boating like Memorial Day and Labor Day. I wouldn't miss 9 of the 10 holidays if they disappeared.
Memorial Day is about Honoring Fallen US Soldiers and Sailors.
Unfortunately Retail hijacked it and the public followed.
I always make it a point to watch a WW2 movie, and give thanks my Dad didn't die in the Pacific before I was born.
@ good point
Invariably people always ask me when I tell them I’m 76 what is my secret? And I tell them never get married never have kids.
One of my girlfriends told me no one ever said if I only worked more hours on their death bed
Depends on what you do.
If your work is your dream and your purpose, you’ll regret not having worked more.
For most men in my family this is not the case. I only know of one who loves his job and even him it is because he worked in the fields and the welded on sky scrapers when he was young until he got a job in sales.
Money is preventing me from chasing my freams, totally stuck because of it
I wish I had spent more time with my -monster- mother in law
-No One Ever
Biggest regret would probably be slaving too much for a mediocre wage, while not living freely and untroubled.
life is one big giant meaningless existence, friendships/love/ sex/ fun are all coping mechanisms
Yes its meaning less we try to find meaning but fruitless as they keep changing and impermanent
Seek which is permanent and eternal
I bet you are fun at parties!🎊
@@john-griffin unlike you i dont sugarcoat the truth, youll be reincarnated back into this life for all eternity.
Life = Cope
My biggest regret was getting married.
After 25 years of marriage, I became the victim of a brutal grey divorce where she got all the cash and prizes. Hypergamy kicked in.. she was bored and found a shiny new toy that moved into MY HOUSE before the ink was dry on the papers. I have nothing for retirement and will be forced to live in a low income apartment or in my van when I retire.
Marriage is at an all time low and whoever is left are getting divorced at an accelerated rate. The birth rate in many countries has also plummeted. Gentlemen ... do not get married and stay single.... better yet....
Go MGTOW Monk and set yourself free.
"Life is a banquet, and most poor suckers are starving to death." Auntie Mame
👋🤗✌️
You're absolutely crazy if you're not eating meat.
I quit eating meat and all animal based products and never felt better. Too much research showing that meat is linked to cancers like colon cancer. Do not call someone who decides to eat a whole food plant based diet crazy. Plant based protein can build muscle as well. The only thing we lack is B-12 which a supplement can fix.
@@Smuggler169- Good luck, they’ve yet to find a prehistoric cave painting of a salad. 🥗
I’m reading a lot of comments that disagree with you
"That word 'should' should be banned from the English language...." Maybe that could have been expressed a little better.... Using the word 'should' (properly) in a sentence that argues for its banning is a little bit paradoxical! And in a section tagged as No "Shoulds".....
That was the point 😎
Biggest Regret I’m guessing would be Getting Married. 😂
But I’m never marrying even though I’ve been asked twice, I’m good. Enjoy life fellas
On the diet part , carnivore diet or keto diet its the best , very low carbs.
Keep saturated fat down 😅 Big mistake
What is with the bots trying to sell the book magnetic aura? Like and subscribe; NB critical of bots.
I run a search on that phrase from time to time and delete them all when I catch them. Thanks.
A big one, invest your money, the boomers had real estate but millennials like myself with no real estate, bitcoin is the only way we will retire with dignity.
My biggest regret was not being myself...I am gay but was pretending that I am straight...and it was not a good idea...it was a burden!
Yeah what a burden not accepting your birth straightness.
die with memories, not dreams
Talk about religion sometime.
Why?
No
Definitely an eye opener video🫡 thanks for this message!
Glad you enjoyed it!
Heathy diet has been taught to me since i was born because i am french. The problem with diet is that it is very difficult to change habits witch where implanted since childhood. Especially when culture is very poor on food like it is in the USA. The basis for healthy diet is basicaly to eat raw food and Cook your own meals. I have noticed that in the USA most poeple can not afford to buy raw food ( meat, fruits, vegetables) because it is very expansive. As a french man i spend a lot of money on healthy ( normal for me) food. But i don t have the choice because eating american processed food makes me sick and depressed.
You're French? I would have never guessed! 🤣