Battlefield Earth - Hilariocity Review

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 22 พ.ค. 2014
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    Chris Stuckmann reviews Battlefield Earth, a movie that's such an atrocity, it's hilarious. Starring John Travolta, Forest Whitaker, Barry Pepper. Directed by Roger Christian.
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  • @joehight8719
    @joehight8719 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1205

    My ex girlfriend was a Sci Fi buff and begged to go see Battlefield Earth in the theatre. We went on a rainy night and 15 minutes into the film, the entire place lost power due to a lightning strike. We were saved!

    • @raptorfae.6645
      @raptorfae.6645 3 ปีที่แล้ว +93

      Guess we know why she's your ex-girlfriend now...

    • @joehight8719
      @joehight8719 3 ปีที่แล้ว +42

      @@raptorfae.6645 HA!

    • @ferociousgumby
      @ferociousgumby 3 ปีที่แล้ว +91

      So even GOD hated the movie and threw a thunderbolt at the theatre! Cool.

    • @joehight8719
      @joehight8719 3 ปีที่แล้ว +34

      @@ferociousgumby That's how it went down. I only wish the film had not been released to any form of home video.

    • @tianapitesr8553
      @tianapitesr8553 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Honestly ppl I still never saw this. It gave Blockbuster Video the plague.

  • @steviev958
    @steviev958 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1466

    This movie was filmed in Montreal right near my house. We found out that inside scenes were being filmed at an old shopping center that was gonna be torn down soon. So every night my friends and I would ride there with our bikes, sit down on the ground next to the secured gate and just watch the flickering blue lights go on and off. It was so cool but the coolest thing is when we first saw Travolta walk to his trailer with his full suit on. It scared the shit outta us but he actually came up to us and said hi. Seriously one of the coolest experiences of my life. Yeah the movie sucked but I’ll never forget those days. Great memories!

    • @samiscebba4332
      @samiscebba4332 4 ปีที่แล้ว +81

      Wat!? This was filmed in Montreal!?!?!?!? I can't tell if I'm proud or ashamed

    • @hazrhyryan3624
      @hazrhyryan3624 4 ปีที่แล้ว +44

      Bruh, that's pretty cool.

    • @raycestg3447
      @raycestg3447 4 ปีที่แล้ว +44

      Pretty cool, thanks for sharing.

    • @Yohanan552
      @Yohanan552 4 ปีที่แล้ว +41

      ...with endless options for renewal....endless options for...

    • @issacczech1742
      @issacczech1742 4 ปีที่แล้ว +38

      terrible movie, wholesome memories

  • @username_unavailable7592
    @username_unavailable7592 4 ปีที่แล้ว +786

    Alternate title for this video: Chris Stuckmann's Spiralling Descent into Madness

    • @MultiDigitalCoder-he7wp
      @MultiDigitalCoder-he7wp 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I feel warned as f- I still have to process the intro even if I didn't watch it for the 1st time x'D

    • @abramsullivan7764
      @abramsullivan7764 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Madness this video as ads it'll cause me to have madness.

    • @montgomeryfitzpatrick473
      @montgomeryfitzpatrick473 ปีที่แล้ว

      He had to be mad before watching cause half the shit he complains about is explained in film or is made obvious intentionally. Kind of makes me doubt his intelligence

    • @Shambles99
      @Shambles99 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Drunk on Wine

  • @blunew467
    @blunew467 3 ปีที่แล้ว +215

    The director of this movie also worked as a set decorator for the first Star Wars movie and the first Alien movie... in fact he helped design the LIGHTSABER and R2D2, two of the most popular things affiliated with Star Wars, he then won an Oscar for Best Art Direction, so technically the director of this movie is an “Oscar winner” just not in the way you would think at first.

    • @voodoochild1975az
      @voodoochild1975az 2 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      Well, as a director, he sure is a great set decorator

    • @vedaryan334
      @vedaryan334 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I beleive that John Travolta influenced a lot of decisions .

  • @DarthCipient
    @DarthCipient 8 ปีที่แล้ว +388

    I'm glad this movie didn't kill Forrest Whitaker's career.

    • @The3rdGunman
      @The3rdGunman 8 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      +DarthCipient Yeah he's dodge a quite a few bullets over the years...
      Battlefield Earth
      Species
      Vantage Point
      Where the Wild Things Are

    • @praisethesun3487
      @praisethesun3487 8 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      +3rd Gunman Where The Wild Things Are isn't a bad movie.

    • @obscureentertainment8303
      @obscureentertainment8303 8 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      He was the least shit part of Taken 3.

    • @The3rdGunman
      @The3rdGunman 8 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      +Obscure Entertainment He just because the corn is separate don't make not a turd

    • @obscureentertainment8303
      @obscureentertainment8303 8 ปีที่แล้ว

      +3rd Gunman What?

  • @thomasleroy5309
    @thomasleroy5309 6 ปีที่แล้ว +713

    Saw this movie in 2000 in a theater across the street from a Scientology center in Hollywood. When it ended, it got a standing ovation.

  • @brandoncobb4646
    @brandoncobb4646 4 ปีที่แล้ว +511

    Your review is the closest I'll ever come to watching this movie.

    • @benediktgraf8659
      @benediktgraf8659 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Wise choice!!! 🤡🚬

    • @brandoncobb4646
      @brandoncobb4646 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @@benediktgraf8659 I'm hurting for more Hilariocity reviews.. binged all these in 2 days.

    • @WowUrFcknHxC
      @WowUrFcknHxC 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Bruh, it's so bad it's great.

    • @brandoncobb4646
      @brandoncobb4646 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @John Anderson you're talking my talk! We would be great co host movie reviewers! * you'd be red to my method man.
      *** or vice versa

    • @nathanisaksson
      @nathanisaksson 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Ditto

  • @kungfew1396
    @kungfew1396 4 ปีที่แล้ว +264

    I remember Roger Ebert's brutal review of this where he said "glad that smell o vision never became a thing".🤣

    • @gaussminigun
      @gaussminigun 3 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      IMAGINE THE SMELL

    • @benediktgraf8659
      @benediktgraf8659 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Don't know, why so many people give a damn about Roger Ebert and consider his babbling legit...
      We're talking about that simple-minded prick who called "Fight Club" a "Fascist big-star movie and macho porn"!!!
      I don't get, how someone who was too simple-minded and deluded to recognize "Fight Club" the brilliant biting social satire, character study, psychological Thriller and dark comedy it is, can be such a respected critic, whose confused babbling gets validated regularly...

    • @user7516
      @user7516 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@benediktgraf8659 I don’t get it either. His take on videogames is pathetic at best.

    • @sanidhyasingh227
      @sanidhyasingh227 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@benediktgraf8659 You do understand that film criticism is subjective. It is just his honest opinion and you cannot judge somebody with just one review.
      Ebert had a 50 year long career and wrote thousands of reviews. Most of them were brilliant and spot on.

  • @Sophie-nz9fz
    @Sophie-nz9fz 6 ปีที่แล้ว +747

    WITH ENDLESS OPTIONS FOR RENEWAL
    WITH ENDLESS OPTIONS FOR RENEWAL
    WITH ENDLESS OPTIONS FOR RENEWAL

    • @jvcg1335
      @jvcg1335 5 ปีที่แล้ว +28

      Hahaahahahaa *evil laugh*

    • @DariusFrench6273
      @DariusFrench6273 5 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      Why am I suddenly echoing? Why I am suddenly echoing? Why am I suddenly echoing?

    • @AudioAndroid
      @AudioAndroid 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Sounds like my Cell Phone Contract

    • @darrellcovello7917
      @darrellcovello7917 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      My favorite part of any movie ever

    • @gustavgnoettgen
      @gustavgnoettgen 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      OBEY

  • @bortak1223
    @bortak1223 10 ปีที่แล้ว +904

    This movie is what I call... Travolting

    • @theycallmeMagneto
      @theycallmeMagneto 10 ปีที่แล้ว +67

      Budum..tsssst

    • @kovy4win
      @kovy4win 10 ปีที่แล้ว +33

      YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!

    • @anikmonette2140
      @anikmonette2140 6 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Bortak Harsh!
      Wait, no it isn't! That was 100% deserved. What was Travolta thinking anyway?

    • @PoeticJHarris
      @PoeticJHarris 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Good one 👍.

    • @neaalitygandhi
      @neaalitygandhi 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Amazing.

  • @DukeSolaire
    @DukeSolaire 3 ปีที่แล้ว +54

    "It's like Star Wars, but better" - John Travolta talking about Battlefield Earth in a press interview before the movie released

    • @LS-oq3qh
      @LS-oq3qh 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Better than Star Wars:Last Jedi?

    • @frde2190
      @frde2190 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@LS-oq3qh not a lot of films are worse than The Last Jedi. But this one is an exception

    • @frde2190
      @frde2190 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@BaranoffIsaac I don’t think people need convincing mate

  • @e1ochai
    @e1ochai 3 ปีที่แล้ว +83

    Watched this movie in the theater while on LSD. Every single fart I had in me got laughed out.

    • @guytrimble8171
      @guytrimble8171 ปีที่แล้ว

      Awesome idea. On my bucket list now.

  • @UnchainedCyclist
    @UnchainedCyclist 9 ปีที่แล้ว +299

    One day if my son really pisses me off, I'll use this film as punishment. Like, "dad, I failed math." and I'll respond, "that's it, go watch Battlefield Earth!" And he'll reply, "nooooooooooooo."

    • @Savebabygorilla
      @Savebabygorilla 9 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      That's why you'll never have a son.

    • @UnchainedCyclist
      @UnchainedCyclist 9 ปีที่แล้ว +22

      I actually have two.

    • @artvandelay9248
      @artvandelay9248 9 ปีที่แล้ว +50

      BikeMontreal With endless options for renewal! With endless options for renewal! With endless options for renewal!

    • @moviebuffer93
      @moviebuffer93 9 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      BikeMontreal too bad for them.

    • @UnchainedCyclist
      @UnchainedCyclist 9 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      BobGrill93 Troll

  • @YourUglygod
    @YourUglygod 8 ปีที่แล้ว +1754

    Sounds like scientology itself...

  • @dasparado
    @dasparado 4 ปีที่แล้ว +42

    As a former crew chief on an F-15, I found the harriers working after 1000 years the worst part of the movie. If you let those planes sit for a year, you have to replace practically everything, not to mention 1000 years.

    • @markiangooley
      @markiangooley ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Even leaving an ordinary car in storage for a few years, even at a steady temperature indoors, off its wheels and sitting on good jack stands, will cause it to deteriorate. Every bell and seal will need replacement if it’s a decade or two. Must be much worse with a jet airplane.

    • @SergyMilitaryRankings
      @SergyMilitaryRankings 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Makes you realize how much of USA and Russia tanks, fighters, and vehicles in storage simply don't work anymore

    • @dedeeprice6560
      @dedeeprice6560 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Oh exactly
      The fuel itself would be a thousand years old so we know that didn't work
      And they were just fueled so where'd they get the fuel from
      But yeah being a thousand years old I couldn't match that either
      But they had to have flying craft from somewhere you know and
      That's when the Dim with writer
      We'll put harriers in it
      Because you couldn't think of any other kind of aircraft
      But there was some funny moments I thought we're good
      It always echo these things
      But it was says well overtooth Transfer
      But yeah the entire fight in the nuclear weapon and blowing up the planet
      It was not exactly well fought out
      Cool concept was really stupid people writing it
      Well see this radiation kills the planet's atmosphere
      Although you're gonna send a nuclear bomb, and this is the one in blue and the whole planet up
      OK, let's think about this for a minute. There is a planet floating around in the universe somewhere in the same kind of thing that we are that has caused me background radiation everywhere
      And yet one little tiny nuclear bomb that you can carry in your hands
      Is it going to blow the whole planet up
      That was really poorly thought out cool effect
      The whole rider through the breath gas exploding
      And then think about it's out in space with s***Tons of radiation that makes it nuclear bomb look Is tiny and weak
      But yet it doesn't explode
      They didn't think that very well at all
      And the whole gold thing in fort knox was kind of funny too I thought that was hilarious
      Because you would think if they had that kind of technology. You could just jump from anywhere right there immediately
      They'd have better ways of detecting gold and see it in fort knox
      But still it was cool effect that way. They didn't know to worry about anything was all there
      Not very wealth all out
      But there was some cool effects in the whole story. Light about aliens on the planet was kind of funny and
      It was kind of cool idea
      They got ruined by but you're stupid
      Or well

    • @BarryHart-xo1oy
      @BarryHart-xo1oy 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Good to know.

  • @knautically
    @knautically 4 ปีที่แล้ว +484

    Me: "Mom can we watch that new Star Wars movie?"
    Mom: We have Star Wars at home."
    *Star Wars at home:*

    • @steamboatwill3.367
      @steamboatwill3.367 4 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      And fans dislike every sequel/prequel/spinoff when this exists?

    • @ladedade23Blunticus
      @ladedade23Blunticus 4 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      @@steamboatwill3.367 no the joke is when your parents say we have it home its always immensely unsatisfactory and and low grade from the whatever you asked your parents to get

    • @steamboatwill3.367
      @steamboatwill3.367 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@ladedade23Blunticus ) and my point is this film is worse.

    • @poohcanplay123
      @poohcanplay123 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      🤣

    • @poohcanplay123
      @poohcanplay123 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      ladedade23 he still don’t get it.

  • @scootsmcgoots
    @scootsmcgoots 8 ปีที่แล้ว +349

    My favourite part about this is that John Travolta was pumped about this film and they were in talks to make a sequel, sort of assuming that it would do awesome. Then... people saw it. Lol.

    • @tyrantgregcagkaiju71
      @tyrantgregcagkaiju71 5 ปีที่แล้ว +34

      Prior to its release, the head of Franchise Pictures (the company who made the movie), Elie Samaha, said of the film, “It’s going to make people in Hollywood take notice of Elie Samaha. I’m not going to be the laughing stock anymore.”

    • @selectivepontification8766
      @selectivepontification8766 5 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      @@tyrantgregcagkaiju71 Little did he know...

    • @tyrantgregcagkaiju71
      @tyrantgregcagkaiju71 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Selective Pontification Little indeed 🙄.

    • @Tornado1994
      @Tornado1994 5 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      @@tyrantgregcagkaiju71 THAT sure went well. LOL!

    • @tyrantgregcagkaiju71
      @tyrantgregcagkaiju71 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Tornado1994 Lol More or less, I guess 🙄. At least they made their money back on DVD and Blu-Ray 😆.

  • @chimpinaneckbrace
    @chimpinaneckbrace 4 ปีที่แล้ว +428

    Whenever I hear about Scientology doing something terrible I just think: “Well at least David Miscavige had to go to the premier of Battlefield Earth and pretend that he liked it."

    • @benadams3569
      @benadams3569 4 ปีที่แล้ว +30

      He probably actually did like it, though.

    • @stickiedmin6508
      @stickiedmin6508 4 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      @@mr.doctor6774
      The family did.
      He didn't.

    • @Brehat29
      @Brehat29 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      @@stickiedmin6508 The US of A. The country in which some rich and powerful guy can make his wife disappear... and nobody asks questions.
      Precious. I thought you had to go to Chili to get such VIP treatment.

    • @Brehat29
      @Brehat29 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @Jazz Feline I beg to differ. Even in China or Russia, you'll get a trial. That said, I'll agree that some really weird stuff happened in several democratic countries but the case of Miscavidge's wife is just weird.
      We are talking about America, here, not some banana republic.

    • @yankees29
      @yankees29 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Yann Fourn were you trying to say “Chile” like the country or “chili” like the food?

  • @KermitHitler
    @KermitHitler 4 ปีที่แล้ว +41

    The best things about Battlefield Earth, is this review, and that uncontrollable Cosby impression

  • @psychowordsmith
    @psychowordsmith 4 ปีที่แล้ว +32

    I bought this on VHS because the cover and title looked cool. That was about 15 years ago. Never even got to 20 minutes both the times I tried.

  • @The3rdGunman
    @The3rdGunman 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1641

    Chris....Why?.......WHY did you not film this entire thing in a Dutch Angle?
    LOL!

    • @spaarkely
      @spaarkely 5 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      3rd Gunman LOL

    • @lizp5004
      @lizp5004 5 ปีที่แล้ว +22

      Ikr?! He could've had it all!

    • @abramsullivan7764
      @abramsullivan7764 5 ปีที่แล้ว +23

      The real question is Chris why did you and your fiancee watch Battlefield Earth in the first place?

    • @leofera1137
      @leofera1137 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      LOL!

    • @darrellcovello7917
      @darrellcovello7917 5 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      Because he actually respects his audience

  • @Ryang403
    @Ryang403 7 ปีที่แล้ว +548

    The people in charge of the Oscars should have, as a prank, have nominated Travolta for an Oscar for this movie. When he's about to do his acceptance speech, they should have brought some people dressed up as them 7 foot tall aliens Doing that evil weird laugh at him.

    • @b3rz3rk3r9
      @b3rz3rk3r9 5 ปีที่แล้ว +41

      Oh lord, that's so... hilariously evil🤣

    • @darrellcovello7917
      @darrellcovello7917 5 ปีที่แล้ว +37

      WITH ENDLESS OPTIONS FOR RENEWAL

    • @starlabradshaw2969
      @starlabradshaw2969 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Mwa-ha-ha-haaa!

    • @grantaum9677
      @grantaum9677 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      I wish they had that much of a sense of humour

    • @Jealod24
      @Jealod24 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      The studio submits movies for Oscar contention and then it’s voted on by all members of the academy... actors, directors, grips, writers etc. Just so you know how the Oscar voting is held

  • @claytongibson2474
    @claytongibson2474 4 ปีที่แล้ว +54

    I rented this movie from Blockbuster one summer in college. I remember finishing it and asking "WTF was that?"

  • @levi1929
    @levi1929 4 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    That bit when you lapsed into a Cosby Coma is hilarious. This movie makes you so mad and your misery is in inverse proportion to my enjoyment. Thanks for taking a hit for the team.

  • @slimyweasles4973
    @slimyweasles4973 8 ปีที่แล้ว +460

    And suddenly...Bill Cosby impression.

    • @thatonedude675
      @thatonedude675 8 ปีที่แล้ว +39

      +Slimy Weasles Without a rape joke. Dignity still lives on!

    • @slimyweasles4973
      @slimyweasles4973 8 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      thatonedude675 Yeah, that too! It's an old-fashioned Bill Cosby joke.

    • @bk148324
      @bk148324 8 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      +thatonedude675 Hannibal Buress called Bill Cosby a rapist on stage around Oct 2014, this review was before that

    • @thatonedude675
      @thatonedude675 8 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      bk148324 Don't ruin this moment

    • @louisvilleuav5794
      @louisvilleuav5794 8 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      There had been Bill Cosby rumors since the early 1980s. His people did a great job 'pre-internet' of keeping the story off the front pages.

  • @jenniferbrewer5370
    @jenniferbrewer5370 4 ปีที่แล้ว +602

    Fun fact: John Travolta came within inches of being declared a 'suppressive person' and thrown out of Scientology by David Miscavige himself (the chairman of Scientology) because this movie is so bad.

    • @michaelskoomamacher5652
      @michaelskoomamacher5652 4 ปีที่แล้ว +92

      The dude were nearly went out of Scientology the easiest way possible. Damn Travolta!

    • @AllanElMelon1043
      @AllanElMelon1043 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Damn unfortunatr

    • @danstone8783
      @danstone8783 4 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      @Alan Smithee Yep. He could actually force a rubber hose up someone's nose and would get away with it.

    • @tiaaaron3278
      @tiaaaron3278 4 ปีที่แล้ว +32

      @@michaelskoomamacher5652 In that Times article in 90s, one of of the former members revealed Travolta is being threatened by Scientology about details of his sexual life.

    • @ashleycaron6953
      @ashleycaron6953 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Tia Aaron what???

  • @jordantewari
    @jordantewari 2 ปีที่แล้ว +20

    I find it interesting how Chris went from this high energy and fun to him sitting in a chair looking sad and depressed.

    • @8xnnr
      @8xnnr ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Life

  • @garycooper8130
    @garycooper8130 4 ปีที่แล้ว +77

    anyone watching this in 2020 to make them laugh? love them.

  • @dariushcreates
    @dariushcreates 7 ปีที่แล้ว +343

    "Worst hero ever"
    "Worst villains ever."
    This sounds like a great movie!

    • @dariushcreates
      @dariushcreates 7 ปีที่แล้ว +35

      sarcasm lol

    • @istinkofpoobut5602
      @istinkofpoobut5602 7 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Dariush Asadi 'this sounds look'

    • @anikmonette2140
      @anikmonette2140 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Eradicated Noodle Yeah, this movie has LSD vibes to it!

    • @notlogicalatall
      @notlogicalatall 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      It isn't a good movie

    • @sithsquid1
      @sithsquid1 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      This movie is crap, but the book is amazing. They changed so much...every plot hole in the movie was created for the movie. Wish they had made the book into a movie.

  • @Belmont-sw4bu
    @Belmont-sw4bu 7 ปีที่แล้ว +626

    Oh hi Johnny I didn't know it was you

    • @fortblocks
      @fortblocks 7 ปีที่แล้ว +49

      That's ME

    • @Belmont-sw4bu
      @Belmont-sw4bu 7 ปีที่แล้ว +56

      Jayden London your my favorite customer.

    • @devinmccreery8003
      @devinmccreery8003 7 ปีที่แล้ว +44

      Hey can I have A dozen red roses.

    • @Lemmywinks1989
      @Lemmywinks1989 7 ปีที่แล้ว +53

      Hai Doggy

    • @RhythmGrizz
      @RhythmGrizz 7 ปีที่แล้ว +32

      Jorge Yanez You're my favorite customer

  • @judsongaiden9878
    @judsongaiden9878 4 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    3:59 "Nice dissolve." ~Barf, Spaceballs
    11:25 Spoony's impersonation is still the best.
    19:07 Cats and dolphins also hunt for sport.

  • @atimtg
    @atimtg 4 ปีที่แล้ว +25

    Travolta looks like the offspring of the original Predator - He even has the laugh down!

  • @NavidIsANoob
    @NavidIsANoob 7 ปีที่แล้ว +185

    Watch as Chris proceeds to progressively lose his mind over the course of 30 minutes.

    • @FrederickIII
      @FrederickIII 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Aculaly 29:58

    • @Tsukuyomi28
      @Tsukuyomi28 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@FrederickIII a full 30 minutes would have killed him

  • @DarkCode
    @DarkCode 4 ปีที่แล้ว +553

    3% critic 12% audience on Rotten Tomatoes ... WITH ENDLESS OPTIONS FOR RENEWAL LMAO!

    • @kylereese3647
      @kylereese3647 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      DarkCode Lol!!!

    • @TacticalWolf69
      @TacticalWolf69 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Good shit mate 😂

    • @ColonelCarnage
      @ColonelCarnage 4 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      If Disney made it now there would be at least an 80% or more critic or audience score on RT.

    • @MarkAS56
      @MarkAS56 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I knew it. At least 1 out of ten people are hopeless fucking morons

    • @tiaaaron3278
      @tiaaaron3278 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@ColonelCarnage Tell that to A Wrinkle in Time.

  • @richardbruning
    @richardbruning 4 ปีที่แล้ว +25

    I watch this repeatedly when I want a laugh. You funny, Chris.

  • @childofbodom1314
    @childofbodom1314 4 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    I grew up with Chris Stuckmann... Anyway outdated meme aside, this really may be Chris's best video. BEST.REVIEWER.EVER!

  • @TheMANOFBLU
    @TheMANOFBLU 10 ปีที่แล้ว +106

    The guy that directed Battlefield Earth Roger Christian did the visual effects for Star Wars (1977) and won an Oscar for it. WTF!!! how did he mess up Battlefield Earth so much

    • @itsOConnell
      @itsOConnell 10 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Shocking! Big fan of yours, by the way. :)

    • @TheMANOFBLU
      @TheMANOFBLU 10 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      itsJoshOConnell Cheers buddy :)

    • @thatguy7331
      @thatguy7331 10 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      And Alien.........freaking Alien

    • @thatguy7331
      @thatguy7331 10 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Still, how do you make a atrocity such as this?

    • @gianlucagiordimaina8794
      @gianlucagiordimaina8794 10 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      actually he won for art-set decoration...

  • @devilpupbear09
    @devilpupbear09 5 ปีที่แล้ว +262

    WITH ENDLESS OPTIONS FOR RENEWAL!
    WITH ENDLESS OPTIONS FOR RENEWAL!
    WITH ENDLESS OPTIONS FOR RENEWAL!

    • @andrewvincent7299
      @andrewvincent7299 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      ..............
      HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    • @kylereese3647
      @kylereese3647 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      devilpupbear09 Lol.

    • @garibaldibritann1240
      @garibaldibritann1240 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I'm sorry, i just take a mistake by saying to repeating myself
      Repeating myself
      Repeating myself
      Repeating...(slaps) ohh i'm an idiot

    • @Sixstringman
      @Sixstringman 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Would you *LIKE* lunch?

    • @AllisonMiller30
      @AllisonMiller30 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      I thought Chris had edited it that way, but I think the film was edited that way.

  • @ericsbuds
    @ericsbuds 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    your impressions of Travolta's character are perfect xD

  • @DragunClips
    @DragunClips 4 ปีที่แล้ว +28

    No one:
    Half of this comment section: 50 cycles with infinite options for renewal!

  • @MrLaxdude89
    @MrLaxdude89 7 ปีที่แล้ว +276

    Chris, you forgot to give it a rating at the end. I mean, I know it's an easy A+ but it'd be nice to just confirm.

    • @GOBIAS.INDUSTRIES.
      @GOBIAS.INDUSTRIES. 7 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      I think that by not giving it a rating, he gave it a rating... you know what I mean? lol

    • @MrLaxdude89
      @MrLaxdude89 7 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      GOBIAS Industries You're right, the A+ goes without saying for this magnum opus.

    • @GOBIAS.INDUSTRIES.
      @GOBIAS.INDUSTRIES. 7 ปีที่แล้ว +42

      ***** Magnum Opus?? More like Magnum Anus...

    • @anikmonette2140
      @anikmonette2140 6 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      GOBIAS Industries Lol, sounds like a name a brand of giant suppositories would come up with: Magnum Anus! Hurt as hell, but works very well!
      Yeah, it was kinda dumb, but it can't be dumber than this movie...

    • @Catglittercrafts
      @Catglittercrafts 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      you're funny Anik

  • @NightFoxx99
    @NightFoxx99 4 ปีที่แล้ว +169

    This performance ended up being what inspired John Travolta's character in the fanatic. He thought to himself, "they think it can't get worse than this...they're wrong."

    • @Spartanslay3r7
      @Spartanslay3r7 4 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      That movie at least got some laughs out of me. This movie made me want to go back to school after calling in sick.

    • @blakedelacruz9496
      @blakedelacruz9496 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Yeah but The Fanatic was actually terribly entertaining but this movie…. I’d rather stare at a white wall for 2 hours instead of this shit

    • @SpamEggSausage
      @SpamEggSausage 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I have this theory that he's been in so many bad movies because the other scientologists told him to

    • @NightFoxx99
      @NightFoxx99 หลายเดือนก่อน

      10:06

  • @THEBaldEagle1
    @THEBaldEagle1 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Ok Chris. So THIS is one of your very best. The Cosby impression has me rolling as I type!
    You and I have GOT to do a side by side review one of these days.
    Amazing. Simply amazing!
    Great job, as always!

  • @moviecrazed2208
    @moviecrazed2208 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I miss these videos sooooo much. You have so much energy man. I watch these once in a while when I have a gaming night. I haven't had one in literal months until tonight! I forgot how good they are! I do understand why you changed your mindset but honestly, you seem to be having so much more fun in these videos!

  • @MsBonjourable
    @MsBonjourable 7 ปีที่แล้ว +266

    I almost pissed myself laughing watching this review. I wish you'd make more of this kind of review. I friggin love it

    • @thewondergirl2396
      @thewondergirl2396 7 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      You, I laughed so hard I was left speechless.

    • @brandonlvns100
      @brandonlvns100 7 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      you, i laughed so hard i punched a baby.

    • @ahardcorejedi2968
      @ahardcorejedi2968 7 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      sameeexD ahaha

    • @aldensworld2565
      @aldensworld2565 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Same 😂 I’ve seen this one six times

    • @dugy-yay1236
      @dugy-yay1236 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Nat Cat yup

  • @RentPayingSpider
    @RentPayingSpider 9 ปีที่แล้ว +159

    The worst thing is this movie made $21 Million

    • @chrisrodriguez20
      @chrisrodriguez20 9 ปีที่แล้ว +27

      I'd agree with you but considering how "the church" operates, it was probably just some way to launder money.

    • @MrLaxdude89
      @MrLaxdude89 9 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      Christopher Rodriguez Actually have you seen the way it was advertised? "Based on one of the best Sci-Fi books of all time." That with the celebrity cast is bound to make SOME money. It still didn't meet the budget of the actual film, so it was still a bomb.

    • @georgesalisbury5996
      @georgesalisbury5996 9 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      LikeABus Well, it allegedly cost $75 million to make and grossed $30 million...

    • @isaacargesmith8217
      @isaacargesmith8217 9 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      George Salisbury How the heck did that cost NEARLY that much?!

    • @Diomedes01
      @Diomedes01 9 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      George Salisbury Although technically, a subsequent lawsuit discovered that the film only cost around $45 million to make and that the production company essentially stole the remainder. They were eventually found guilty, had to pay a settlement and finally filed for bankruptcy.

  • @Valleyraven007
    @Valleyraven007 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    Going back through these I just realized this was uploaded on my birthday. Thanks Chris, I hat- love it.

  • @miriammanolov9135
    @miriammanolov9135 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    That's probably the best review I've seen in a while ... I laughed so hard at your reactions 😂😂

  • @davidminor4213
    @davidminor4213 5 ปีที่แล้ว +747

    In all seriousness, I challenge Hollywood to remake this and make it good. Really.
    Why not improve on crap instead of ruin classics?
    Edit: This is a little late, but I'm glad to see that they did exactly that with Dune!!

    • @TheTeufelhunden68
      @TheTeufelhunden68 4 ปีที่แล้ว +63

      If someone can make this film good. I will believe in god. Neither will happen.

    • @rodh1404
      @rodh1404 4 ปีที่แล้ว +46

      @@TheTeufelhunden68 The book itself has some flaws, but it's decent enough. But it's very long, and it's more of a parody than serious sci-fi. It could be turned into a good movie, but it would need to be very different to this one. And you'd need to film multiple parts because you couldn't properly tell the story in just one movie.

    • @rodh1404
      @rodh1404 4 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      @cumquatrct3 I was aware that there was supposed to be a followup to Battlefield Earth, but the original left out so many important parts of the story that it didn't make any sense. There's a reason Terl needs Humans as miners, and a reason why Terl doesn't understand Humans at all. But the film doesn't really explain this, and it makes it a much weaker film overall.
      I think the film would have done better if it had started in an earlier time period, shortly before the invasion. It could have started with the launch of Voyager, followed that with the Psychlos discovering Voyager and learning where Earth is and the fact they can find gold there, and then shown the invasion, including desperate scenes of nuclear bombs being used to blow up the invading forces. That could be followed up with the final scene of the Earth being covered by poisonous gas delivered by giant spacecraft. After that, they could have shown the Chinkos being sent to Earth to preserve Human books and buildings, as well as learn Human languages and culture. They could show them recording their information, and then being exterminated as a race by the Psychlos for being useless.
      All of that might have taken 15 - 20 minutes, but it would have explained a lot of the background the film is missing in a "show, don't tell" method. Because ultimately, films should be about storytelling, and even though Battlefield Earth has many weaknesses, I'd argue that not telling the story well would be it's worst.

    • @_dark_170
      @_dark_170 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Medical science would have a better chance at making a "good" form of metastatic breast cancer.

    • @davidminor4213
      @davidminor4213 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      @@rodh1404 The film is so infamous that if a remake were to receive positive reviews, there would be money to be made in it.
      This could also potentially launch a new trend. Poorly executed book adaptions that are properly executed in the remake.

  • @thomson765
    @thomson765 8 ปีที่แล้ว +369

    haha Chris lost his mind reviewing this shit. so you could say Scientology prevailed :O

    • @paulmajano
      @paulmajano 8 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      +Thomas E I see what you did there lol

    • @colleen4ever
      @colleen4ever 7 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Quick! We must help him before the aliens take possession of his body! LOL!!

    • @shammy63
      @shammy63 7 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      quiet, man animal!

  • @leonausten1800
    @leonausten1800 4 ปีที่แล้ว +41

    Should have called them ,,Manimals“, missed opportunity...

    • @cavejohnson4306
      @cavejohnson4306 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      It’s because “manimal” is a show that already exists. It’s probably copyrighted.

  • @atticstattic
    @atticstattic 3 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    Watching Chris slowly go insane is my favorite thing this week....

  • @Digmer
    @Digmer 7 ปีที่แล้ว +269

    lady gaga wants her shoes back.

  • @diamondsnake1273
    @diamondsnake1273 4 ปีที่แล้ว +247

    Chris Stuckmann: No one's runs like that
    Steven Segal: Hold my beer

    • @TheTeufelhunden68
      @TheTeufelhunden68 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Good call!

    • @ericferguson9989
      @ericferguson9989 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Chariots of Fire

    • @jeffwells641
      @jeffwells641 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      You might not know this but Steven Segal has been running for 73 years. He's kind of an expert.

    • @legalam
      @legalam 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Hold my wig and yellow tactical shooting glasses

    • @scottmantooth8785
      @scottmantooth8785 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      *it was the secret to Forrest Gumps own acceleration boost on the track and football fields*
      *Just sayin'*

  • @Zao911
    @Zao911 4 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    It’s like Cats (2019) without whiskers

  • @AJayTwo001
    @AJayTwo001 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    14:16
    Chris: we get shot by this sound effect!
    TH-cam Ad interruption: We Are Farmers!
    Sometimes ad's are good?

  • @chrischeng2922
    @chrischeng2922 9 ปีที่แล้ว +29

    When you kept on zooming in saying "Endless options for renewal" I spat out my drink LMAO. You are awesome

  • @michaeldublg
    @michaeldublg 4 ปีที่แล้ว +102

    Your impression of John Travolta's alien character is spot-on and hilarious.
    .....

    • @paulanthony5274
      @paulanthony5274 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      I wonder when they decided to make the aliens sound like demented middle class Englishmen with there pants on too tight.

  • @das_bouk
    @das_bouk 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    10:00 - "Poor Johnny learns his transfer request was denied." I think you meant Turl.

  • @rudygarcia8436
    @rudygarcia8436 4 ปีที่แล้ว +48

    John Travolta would later make a worse movie, The Fanatic

  • @Timliu92
    @Timliu92 8 ปีที่แล้ว +156

    "...With endless options for renewal.
    With endless options for renewal.
    With endless options for renewal."
    Wow. Talk about pointless repetition for no reason whatsoever. Sums up how badly made the film is.

    • @TeChNoWC7
      @TeChNoWC7 7 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      I think it drives home the repetitiveness of his fate. Nothing wrong with it

    • @anikmonette2140
      @anikmonette2140 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Timliu92 Nothing wrong with repetitiveness, unless it makes the movie a boring mess...

  • @artvandelay9248
    @artvandelay9248 9 ปีที่แล้ว +129

    I love how most of the Hilariocity films involve a "John" of some kind:
    Battlefield Earth: Johnnie (The hero) and John Travolta
    The Room: Johnny (Tommy Wiseau)
    The Wicker Man: The film was devoted to Johnny Ramone
    Steel: John Henry Irons (Shaq)
    Mortal Kombat Annihilation: Johnny Cage
    Batman and Robin: John Glover as the mad doctor
    The upcoming Vampire's Kiss review: Johnny Walker (actor)

    • @NeroSpirito444
      @NeroSpirito444 9 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      John does sometimes mean dick

    • @ithila6712
      @ithila6712 8 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      +darkdemonsouls or bathroom facility aka toilet

    • @seventyeight3452
      @seventyeight3452 8 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      John leguizamo in the happening

    •  5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Great observation.👏🏾👏🌟

  • @allisonwhisler4149
    @allisonwhisler4149 ปีที่แล้ว

    Chris, whenever I’m having a bad day, I come back and watch this video. And also the Cats review. They are comedy gold

  • @gynsylightburn7673
    @gynsylightburn7673 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    This is one of my all time best youtube videos🤩 its what began my Chris Stuckmann fandom! Love love love your work Mr Stuckmann! You are the positive peoples critic!xx

  • @brokenregistry
    @brokenregistry 8 ปีที่แล้ว +265

    Suggestions for future hilariocity reviews
    Adventures of Pluto Nash
    Fant4stic
    Troll 2

    • @Jel01975
      @Jel01975 8 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Fan4stick lol

    • @BlizzyFoxTF
      @BlizzyFoxTF 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      how Chris himself calls it

    • @phildeep2165
      @phildeep2165 7 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Fan4stic but there nothing funny about that it's just bad nothing funny about it

    • @TheCapelessCrusader
      @TheCapelessCrusader 7 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      He said that Fant4stic isn't even a hilariosity, it's just straight up bad.

    • @shaharavigdori8641
      @shaharavigdori8641 7 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      I want foodfight

  • @michaelburgarino
    @michaelburgarino 7 ปีที่แล้ว +92

    Chris Stuckmann is now on Scientology's list

  • @issahumps
    @issahumps 4 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    "we decided to keep you on for 50 cycles"
    Travoltas character internal monologue: dental plan! ...Lisa needs braces!

  • @BrandonKellyYT
    @BrandonKellyYT 3 ปีที่แล้ว +30

    this was 1000% more entertaining than the movie good job 😂

  • @SamnissArandeen
    @SamnissArandeen 7 ปีที่แล้ว +96

    The Catching Fire poster in the background completes this review nicely. Katniss is trying to do you a favor and shoot out the screen, sparing you the horror of this terribad movie.

    • @SamnissArandeen
      @SamnissArandeen 7 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      *****
      Main character, Hunger Games series (of which Catching Fire is second).

    • @slen9658
      @slen9658 6 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Or trying to shoot Chris in the head.

  • @aldensworld2565
    @aldensworld2565 6 ปีที่แล้ว +142

    I just realized that I’ve seen this review six times 😂. I frickin love this channel.

    • @JustSriCh
      @JustSriCh 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Alden Williams only six?

    • @planescaped
      @planescaped 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      He really missed the opportunity to have different wipes for every cut though...

    • @longlivegarybusey6409
      @longlivegarybusey6409 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      That's called brain damage my man....might wanna get that checked out.

    • @cococupcakez
      @cococupcakez 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      I though I was the only 1 who watched chris' reviews over and over again lol

  • @timothybruns2775
    @timothybruns2775 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Sometimes when you watch older videos, you can see the development of a person on TH-cam. But to be honest Chris Stuckmann is a great recensist, he is funny, honest and trustworthy.

  • @lordrefrigeratorintercoole288
    @lordrefrigeratorintercoole288 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    Jhon Travolta's Character: "Oh ma god, my ape peaople are TRAVOLTing against me"

  • @vero-kd8vg
    @vero-kd8vg 8 ปีที่แล้ว +60

    ''SPELL YOUR NAME!''
    ''...Adele Dazeem.''
    OMG I LOST IT!!

  • @josky6001
    @josky6001 4 ปีที่แล้ว +226

    if aliens lands on earth , I'm showing them Battlefield Earth.

    • @Nev1esomnia
      @Nev1esomnia 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      *X-files music plays intensely*

    • @David-se5ph
      @David-se5ph 3 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      I think you would offend them by showing them this atrocity 😂😂😂😂

    • @anikmonette2140
      @anikmonette2140 3 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      I'm afraid they'll see it as an act of war...

    • @leothebackgroundsheep3010
      @leothebackgroundsheep3010 3 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      Do you want earth to turn into Alderaan? Cause that’s how earth will turn into Alderaan.

    • @paulanthony5274
      @paulanthony5274 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@David-se5ph You could offend them with endless options for renewal endless options for renewal endless options for renewal. 🙄

  • @emperman
    @emperman 4 ปีที่แล้ว +33

    This movie is why Scientologists aren't taken seriously across the world

    • @TalicZealot
      @TalicZealot 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Uhhh no. Scientology is why Scientologists aren't taken seriously by sane and reasonable people.

    • @gkkato9249
      @gkkato9249 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@TalicZealot I wonder why Christianity is taken serious

    • @OptimusDelta
      @OptimusDelta 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@gkkato9249 true..

  • @HereticDuo
    @HereticDuo 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    In an alternate reality this was the greatest film ever made.
    Also in that reality humanity is almost extinct from an unimaginably high suicide rate.

  • @BudhagRizzo
    @BudhagRizzo 8 ปีที่แล้ว +56

    Where people see garbage, I see opportunity. Somebody should take this movie, re-edit and re-dub it, and turn it into a full blown comedy!

    • @anikmonette2140
      @anikmonette2140 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Gardner De Aguiar Even better: remakes.
      At least you can't do worse, and some bad movies also have huge potential, why not exploit that?

  • @johnlime1469
    @johnlime1469 4 ปีที่แล้ว +271

    30 minutes of Chris gradually losing his mind.

    • @Yolanda8419
      @Yolanda8419 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      I know, right?

    • @tacooflove6175
      @tacooflove6175 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Should see him review the live action Dbz movie 🍿

    • @David-se5ph
      @David-se5ph 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Taco Of Love 💗 that review is the one good thing that came out of Dragonball Evolution’s existence.

    • @benediktgraf8659
      @benediktgraf8659 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Definitely, without any fucking doubt, deeper, more valuable entertainment than this parody of a 'movie'!!!

  • @Tarantino111
    @Tarantino111 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    I've been binge watching alla of the hillarioricity vidoes and I'm fucking laughing like never before. Love you Chris, the best movie reviewer in the world.

  • @TheRealFaceyNeck
    @TheRealFaceyNeck 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    22:00 - The gold bars would likely be "perfect" as you say. If pure gold does actually tarnish, it's never been seen before. Gold is possibly the least reactive metal on Earth.

  • @thedanceparty7839
    @thedanceparty7839 7 ปีที่แล้ว +142

    Forest Whitaker looks like a swollen up Whoopi Goldberg

    • @HateTaxesWASt
      @HateTaxesWASt 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      The Dance Party oh good god

    • @chaburchak
      @chaburchak 6 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      A swollen up Whoopi Goldberg...isn't that redundant? Like a "tiny shrimp"?

    • @damienbreitsprecher5483
      @damienbreitsprecher5483 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I’m in school, read this, and started crying cause I was laughing so hard.

    • @kevinpogue7294
      @kevinpogue7294 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      So, like Whoopi Goldberg then, in other words.

  • @ianquyck9834
    @ianquyck9834 8 ปีที่แล้ว +23

    The "endless options for renewal" impressions was hilarious Chris

  • @cameronfielder4955
    @cameronfielder4955 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I’ve learned a great deal about film from you Chris. Keep up the good work my man: btw I’ve probably watched this video already but I rewatch your videos because pot erases me memory. Dutch angle! I remember that!

  • @madmoviekid
    @madmoviekid 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

    My favourite Stuckmann video ever

  • @JumbledEye
    @JumbledEye 5 ปีที่แล้ว +83

    Gold doesn't tarnish. It stays perfect and shiny. Gold jewelry that were made a thousand years ago look like they could have been crafted yesterday.

    • @danielwilson8604
      @danielwilson8604 5 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Many, many people and countries have historical traditions based on that and scientific fields that exist solely because of this fact

    • @Paul_The_Spaceman
      @Paul_The_Spaceman 5 ปีที่แล้ว +30

      Is it also dustproof.

    • @CarbonTech19
      @CarbonTech19 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @@Paul_The_Spaceman lol.

    • @jacobussmit1453
      @jacobussmit1453 4 ปีที่แล้ว +24

      The point I think he was making is that somebody opened the vault previously and DIDN'T take any gold for some reason

    • @danielwilson8604
      @danielwilson8604 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @Jeff V I'm skeptical of the first, but vaguely remember the second. That said, thank you, I shall check this.

  • @rschiwal
    @rschiwal 4 ปีที่แล้ว +246

    I actually liked the book. It had some decent plot twists. I saw, but blocked out the movie.
    Later on, I learned that Psyclos were, according to Hubbard, an actual super race that was corrupted by - wait for it - psychiatrists.

    • @TH3F4LC0Nx
      @TH3F4LC0Nx 4 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      Look, I'm not trying to defend L. Ron Hubbard or his batshit crazy "religion", but I will say that psychiatry, or rather the broader field of psychology, is a field that has earned a certain level of distrust. Not that I believe any of the shit that Hubbard tried to push, but I'll say that his distrust of psychiatry was not unfounded.

    • @theangryholmesian4556
      @theangryholmesian4556 4 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      @@TH3F4LC0Nx I'm a former psychology major and I'm curious...what are some of your issues with psychology/psychiatry? I know about the misuse of psychology/psychiatry in the past (lobotomies, electroshock "treatment", "conversion" therapy, etc...) But I think today psychology has recognized its mistakes and is self correcting. Again just curious.

    • @TH3F4LC0Nx
      @TH3F4LC0Nx 4 ปีที่แล้ว +29

      Ok, I just wanna preface what I'm about to say here by saying I don't mean to offend you, or anyone else who is interested in psychology. I, myself, at one time wanted to be a psychology major. Anyway, here goes: psychology is 10% science and 90% bullshit. Why is psychology like that, you may ask? For the simple reason that psychology is separate from all other branches of science in that the thing being studied is the exact same thing as the tools used to study it. By that, I mean that psychology, as you doubtless already know, is the study of the human mind. What do we use to study the human mind with? Other human minds. The human mind is an immensely complex thing; it is also fallible and subject to bias. That's why psychology has led to many dangerous theories in the past that have no actual basis in reality. Psychology is unique among the sciences in that the burden of proof often rests not on the person making a claim to prove that claim to be true, but rather on others to prove that claim untrue. Psychology is a reversal of the normal way in which theories are tested. Take, for example, Sigmund Freud. Freud is the granddaddy of analytical psychology; even people who know nothing about psychology know his name. At one time, his books were treated as gospel; now, they're recognized for what they were. That is, complete crap. As a psychology major, you probably already know that no institution of any merit would EVER use Sigmund Freud as a citation or reference in any article or paper today. So much of what he postulated has been revealed to be utter garbage. As an example, take penis envy. That one is just hilarious by today's standards, being a blatantly sexist male fantasy. Today, we know that penis envy is total shit. Karen Horney, however, postulated womb envy as a rebuttal to Freud's theory. Is there any evidence for that one either? Of course not! Both of those things are just people thinking that if they articulate and give voice to things which they would like to be true, that that will make them true. It doesn't. An even bigger imbecile who is still revered today is Carl Jung. Half of everything that guy said is EXTREMELY misogynistic and racist, (not to mention the fact that he was dangerously close to being an all-out Nazi!). I mean really; the Anima, the Shadow? Do those things even exist, or are they just the ramblings of a deeply sexist man who disparaged women every chance he got? I should add here that I am, above all else, an individualist. I do not believe that a person's nature is determined by either their race or their gender. Yes, there are things that are distinct between men and women; women, in general, tend to feel emotion more deeply than men, but then again, there are plenty of women out there who don't. That's because people are individuals who cannot be defined by any one thing. When I read shit by Carl Jung in which he says things like, "It is not in a woman's nature to...(insert whatever you wish)", that just pisses me off, because one woman is not comparable to another. That's another problem I have with psychology; it tries to relegate the human mind, a thing that is largely unique to every person, into categories that can be easily defined. Life isn't that simple. But psychology is a field that people who have some wild-ass agenda flock to because it allows them to say whatever they wish, because when you're dealing with intangible concepts, it's very difficult to objectively argue. Take, for example, Jordan Peterson, (who, I might add, is an ardent disciple of Carl Jung, which really explains a lot, actually...). Anyway, there is a video you can see on TH-cam of Peterson giving a lecture in which he makes a STUNNINGLY insipid claim. He claims in this video that the symbol of two entwined snakes, a symbol that can be found in artwork the world over, is actually a representation of the double-helix of DNA, which ancient peoples discovered by taking hallucinogenic drugs and mind-tripping their way to a scientific discovery that was not actually made until centuries later. I'm not kidding, he actually thinks that! It couldn't be that snakes entwine themselves together when mating. No, that would be too boring. Occam's Razor goes out the window with Peterson! Anyway, to wrap this up, I'll just say that I distrust psychology because it is a field of study where things that are at one time accepted as truth are then thrown out later on down the road. Yes, all sciences are constantly evolving, but psychology takes it to a whole new level. How can you trust something now that will likely be tossed out later?

    • @1Atlkid
      @1Atlkid 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@TH3F4LC0Nx That is an interesting view about this field of science.

    • @cheekbuster1250
      @cheekbuster1250 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @@TH3F4LC0Nx cool story bro

  • @Kevinmuckout
    @Kevinmuckout 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    9 years ago! LOL What a stud.. Been watching you for years dude. Can't wait for Shelby Oaks!

  • @jansenart0
    @jansenart0 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    I think the movie's a fun watch. I'd never read the book (i found a copy of Dianetics, which I tried to read; it tells you you have to get rid of your preconceptions about language. That's like the 2nd thing a cult does to you.) because of the author, but I thought it was hilarious, interesting and actually engrossing. There are movies not worth watching. This one might be near that line, but it's not bad bad.

  • @kinghailz786
    @kinghailz786 10 ปีที่แล้ว +194

    This is like "The Wolf of Wall Street" of TH-cam videos. The amount of F*CK's in this review is astonishing, especially from you Chris :D

    • @midnight15086
      @midnight15086 10 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      ***** Haha that's funny that you mention that because I only actually noticed him say fuck once. I'm sure you're right but somehow I never even notice it. I saw Wolf of Wall Street and afterward ppl were talking about how many f words there were, and I thought about it and thought yeah that's probably true, but never noticed that many during the movie. Whatever, it's just another word.

    • @DarinMichaelGrant
      @DarinMichaelGrant 10 ปีที่แล้ว +25

      midnight15086 Actually, he said it at least 20 times. It was/is pretty crazy considering how much he tries to keep his reviews clean...I guess Battlefield Earth can just do that to any person who subjects themselves to it. :) LOL

    • @kinghailz786
      @kinghailz786 10 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Darin Michael Numbers win!

    • @shishkarobb
      @shishkarobb 10 ปีที่แล้ว +24

      Having suffered through Battlefield Earth, I honestly believe it would make the Pope himself drop the F-bomb a few times.

    • @midnight15086
      @midnight15086 10 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      shishkarobb Lol I've never seen Battlefield Earth but Chris's review had me laughing constantly. Sounds like a terrible movie.

  • @liamshields7731
    @liamshields7731 9 ปีที่แล้ว +153

    I just watched it, it took me a whole week to get through it!!!

    • @dreamwarrior1276
      @dreamwarrior1276 8 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      We're proud of you, its not easy.

    • @liamshields7731
      @liamshields7731 8 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Seth Brundle Thanks man

    • @dreamwarrior1276
      @dreamwarrior1276 8 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Liam Shields Your welcome, now just watch it with your buddies one day while drinking.

    • @ithila6712
      @ithila6712 8 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      A week of your life you will never get back

    • @liamshields7731
      @liamshields7731 8 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Ithila I know, right :(

  • @thatkeyboardgirlsha3442
    @thatkeyboardgirlsha3442 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I MISS YOU CHRIS PLEASE COME BACK TO REVIEWS LIKE THESE

  • @joserodriguez1678
    @joserodriguez1678 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Watching this in 2020 makes me think of the many moments where Chris goes insane with this Hilariocity reviews.

  • @addiereynolds3961
    @addiereynolds3961 7 ปีที่แล้ว +32

    I just assumed Chris was doing a terrible impression of the evil laughs at first but nope, he was spot-on

  • @nerblebun
    @nerblebun 4 ปีที่แล้ว +87

    "Who runs like that with their arms flailing? Nobody!" Er.... Captain Jack Sparrow.

    • @lecyd
      @lecyd 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Steven Seagal when he was able to run. It's truly amazing :))

    • @kylereese3647
      @kylereese3647 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Grandpa the Grey Don't you dare say that about my man jack! He runs better than that.

    • @nerblebun
      @nerblebun 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      @@kylereese3647: Jack Sparrow runs like a limp wrist little girl who just touched worm guts, but it's funny & unique to the character.

    • @scottmantooth8785
      @scottmantooth8785 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      *Forrest Gump maybe?*

  • @scottmantooth8785
    @scottmantooth8785 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    *why do i keep returning and re-watching this movie review over and over?...must be the impressive use of all those Dutch Angles and transition wipes*

    • @mariakelly90210
      @mariakelly90210 ปีที่แล้ว

      BTW, are you any relation to Randolph Mantooth?

  • @MarcLombart
    @MarcLombart 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Fun fact, when John Travolta was shilling this movie he said two blatant lies. One, Battlefield Earth is he best science-fiction book of all time, he never read any. Two, this movie is a faithful adaptation of the book. The book was better.

  • @Dogboy73
    @Dogboy73 4 ปีที่แล้ว +37

    I didn’t realise this was film a Travolta / Scientology abortion. Makes perfect sense now.

  • @amirgarcia547
    @amirgarcia547 8 ปีที่แล้ว +25

    This movie is sadly what ruined John Trevolta's career. I mean, I'd be entirely embarrassed to even know the guy after this.

  • @Howlingburd19
    @Howlingburd19 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Chris’s imitation of John Travolta is just... brilliant xD

  • @Lowlander-ci7is
    @Lowlander-ci7is 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    So this is where the sniper dude from saving Private Ryans career went wrong...
    I was wondering what happened to him.... Ha!