How to Make a Narcissist Panic

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 5 ก.ค. 2024
  • 💪Are you ready to dominate narcissists and take your back in any conversation? Join me for a free live webinar! Click here to sign up 👉👉slay.rebeccazung.com/freetrai...
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    How to Make a Narcissist Panic//Do you want to know what makes a narcissist panic?
    ✅DISCOVER HOW TO NEGOTIATE WITH NARCISSISTS AND WIN ALL THE TIME IN THIS FREE MASTERCLASS:👉slay.rebeccazung.com/
    There are things that the narcissist fears more than anything and nothing makes a narcissist miserable more than ways to drive them mad. If you want to expose the narcissist, outsmart the narcissist and/or figure out how to control the narcissist, then watch this video to learn how to turn the tables on them and have them panicking in a way that they always make you usually do!
    #narcissists #narcissism #rebeccazung
    🎓What you’ll learn in the webinar:
    The 3 empowering secrets you need to take back control when communicating with narcissists.
    How to develop a winning, foolproof strategy to drive the outcome you want out of negotiations with narcissists.
    How to be more powerful, persuasive and confident when negotiating with narcs.
    What to say in negotiation and how to say it so that you can beat narcs at their own game!
    How to anticipate what the narcissist will do and be two steps ahead of them at all times.
    About Rebecca Zung:
    ✅Rebecca Zung is one of the Top 1% of attorneys in the nation, having been recognized by U.S. News & World Report as a “Best Lawyer in America”, as “Legal Elite” by Trend Magazine, and recognized by her peers and the judiciary as AV(c), preeminent rated in family law, the highest possible rating for an attorney by Martindale Hubbell.
    ✅But her journey wasn’t always easy. She got married at 19, had 3 children and divorced at the age of 23. She was a divorced single mom when she decided to go back to law school. She went from being a single mom, college dropout, to becoming one the most powerful lawyers in the country at the helm of a multi-million dollar practice. She is now committed to sharing her secrets and empowering others to live their lives at their optimum level of success, professionally and personally.
    ✅She is the author of the bestselling books, Negotiate Like You M.A.T.T.E.R.: The Sure Fire Method to Step Up and Win and Breaking Free: A Step-by-Step Divorce Guide for Achieving Emotional, Physical, and Spiritual Freedom, and is a sought after major media contributor.
    ✅She has been featured in Extra, Forbes, Huffington Post, Newsweek, Time, Dr. Drew, NPR Talk Radio, Good Day New York and CBS Los Angeles among others. She is the host of the popular show Negotiate Your Best Life™ which is available on TH-cam and as a Top Podcast. She is also a frequent keynote speaker.
    --
    🎓FREE WEBINAR: DISCOVER HOW TO TURN THE TABLES ON A NARCISSIST HERE:👉slay.rebeccazung.com/
    Disclaimer: The commentary and opinions are for informational purposes only and not for the purpose of providing legal advice. You should contact an attorney in your state to obtain legal advice with respect to any particular issue or problem.
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ความคิดเห็น • 11K

  • @RebeccaZungEsq
    @RebeccaZungEsq  3 ปีที่แล้ว +188

    📌Want to learn more? Get your FREE webinar and learn how to negotiate with narcissists like a pro. Click here now:👉 www.rebeccazung.com/live

    • @metatechnologist
      @metatechnologist 3 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      Can you help me divorce my mother??

    • @Bellasie1
      @Bellasie1 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Great video, thank you!

    • @williamoconnell6886
      @williamoconnell6886 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Ive been with a narcissistwife for 10 years.

    • @nocapp6180
      @nocapp6180 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      TOTALLY.... Yes Lord now my 11yr old who lives with him is afraid & I don't have help with saving my son

    • @nocapp6180
      @nocapp6180 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@metatechnologistI wish I could divorce my Narc family members I just don't come @ don't call just break free don't call them either & pray love I'm so sorry that its your Mom I'm praying for you Thank God my grandparents & my Mom was not one Thank you Jesus

  • @deanweston5744
    @deanweston5744 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1808

    My advise is dont play games with a narcissist. Just walk out the door and say a permanent good bye.

    • @jessy1554
      @jessy1554 4 ปีที่แล้ว +151

      @@RebeccaZungEsq unfortunately easier said than done if you have little kids with them! :(

    • @maryterezk8657
      @maryterezk8657 4 ปีที่แล้ว +34

      @@jessy1554 exactly.. The more I watch these videos, the more I see why my mother suffered so much in her marriage. Even though I respect my father.

    • @edieminturn7484
      @edieminturn7484 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Yes.

    • @jcat5100
      @jcat5100 4 ปีที่แล้ว +93

      You can play a little but be smart .. it's good to give them a taste of their own medicine before that permanent goodbye 😉

    • @radkahunter2908
      @radkahunter2908 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Dean Weston Amen to that!!!

  • @destinymaxson6113
    @destinymaxson6113 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1588

    That narcissist stare they give you when you "did" or "said something wrong" or something that angers them....... its like staring into the eyes of a demon....

    • @ksize3147
      @ksize3147 4 ปีที่แล้ว +146

      The eyes are the window to the soul. How well I know the narcissist stare....no soul there....just dark emptiness while they plot how to get back at you.

    • @sallyslawson-dyer4231
      @sallyslawson-dyer4231 4 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      I totally agree

    • @zachsheets9033
      @zachsheets9033 4 ปีที่แล้ว +104

      I've seen this too many times. My ex was so good at pretending to be an angel while lying about everything. She seemed so amazing until the second she was caught in a lie...her eyes would do this thing where it was like the light behind them just flipped off like a switch. It was like all her empathy just turned off (cuz it was never real to begin with) it was so fucking disturbing. Almost like a real life nightmare

    • @crimsonking7955
      @crimsonking7955 4 ปีที่แล้ว +53

      Been there, done that. Didn't know what I was seeing at the time, like looking at two dark holes where her eyes used to be.

    • @lizdiaz4524
      @lizdiaz4524 4 ปีที่แล้ว +25

      Omg yes! I told him once, “you should look at yourself in the mirror” look at you-yourself. He walked away. 1st time I ever saw this on him.

  • @kimmanning2913
    @kimmanning2913 ปีที่แล้ว +64

    1. BRUTAL HONESTY
    2. PUSH BACK
    3. EXPOSING THEM
    4. LOSING CONTROL

    • @chriscogley7216
      @chriscogley7216 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      Big time your right

    • @RebeccaZungEsq
      @RebeccaZungEsq  3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      If you are so sick of the drama, trauma, and chaos- and want real powerful strategies for success - I’ve got the answer for you - sign up for our free webinar and start your transformative journey- this is the day your life changes! Woohoo! www.icanslay.com 🌀✨

  • @leonag2
    @leonag2 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +10

    My narcissistic partner has abused me mentally and physically, emotionally as well but 2 days ago, he walked off the aeroplane after causing a scene because we weren’t seated next to each other, the stewardess took me to the back of the aeroplane and said she was away to ask him to disembark but he’d went anyway, I’ve ended up in Tenerife alone for my birthday, I’m so so thankful my daughter has organised a flight to come over and see me tomorrow

    • @RebeccaZungEsq
      @RebeccaZungEsq  3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      If you are so sick of the drama, trauma, and chaos- and want real powerful strategies for success - I’ve got the answer for you - sign up for our free webinar and start your transformative journey- this is the day your life changes! Woohoo! www.icanslay.com 🌀✨

  • @EmmyLeeSpencer
    @EmmyLeeSpencer 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1693

    When they realize that they don’t have any control over you they will try to lie to everyone around and make people around them think that you’re a bad person!

    • @helenlesley5456
      @helenlesley5456 3 ปีที่แล้ว +60

      Yes Emmy Lee,...so true..."Divide and conquer' that's one of their main ploys

    • @tracynewton3083
      @tracynewton3083 3 ปีที่แล้ว +27

      Yes thats right you are scapegoat they are called the flying monkeys. Its very biblical. Just imagine fallen angels want what we have. Kindness kills someone if they are evily intent upon you. 💃 Hope this helps. Up the light vibrations love out hard love those that act not fake act. X

    • @lisamidgett664
      @lisamidgett664 3 ปีที่แล้ว +40

      I’m married to one. I need help getting rid of him

    • @yourboiD
      @yourboiD 3 ปีที่แล้ว +22

      @@lisamidgett664 leave him no excuses

    • @lisamidgett664
      @lisamidgett664 3 ปีที่แล้ว +23

      @@yourboiD he is a walking excuse

  • @billie44
    @billie44 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1708

    Best way to deal with them
    Its to not deal with them

    • @wendydrummond7395
      @wendydrummond7395 4 ปีที่แล้ว +51

      True accept they stalk which is called Hoovering

    • @KATLABELLE1
      @KATLABELLE1 4 ปีที่แล้ว +34

      The best way to deal with them is to not give a toss... Thankfully it is possible. Takes time but one day we wke up to their shitiness... And God that feel great !!

    • @amtonio5602
      @amtonio5602 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@facelesspsycho8252 male disabled noticed she was a narcicist after my disability gott worst. Then I stoped being.a.narcisist also

    • @Liquidcadmus
      @Liquidcadmus 4 ปีที่แล้ว +39

      the problem is that most of the time you can't tell someone has this psychopathy and by the time you realized, it's too late. and trying to cut ties with someone who has severe narcissistic disorder can prove to be very difficult. they will go out of their way to try and reel you in, provoke you, even do illegal or dangerous things in order to get what they want. they are not normal or rational people.

    • @camrygirl84
      @camrygirl84 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      michael morgan Totally!

  • @juliettailor1616
    @juliettailor1616 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +13

    Oh God! They are always sick. It's the feeling sorry, victimhood. But only in front of people who tolerate it. It's really, really hard not to call them out on this.

    • @RebeccaZungEsq
      @RebeccaZungEsq  3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      If you are so sick of the drama, trauma, and chaos- and want real powerful strategies for success - I’ve got the answer for you - sign up for our free webinar and start your transformative journey- this is the day your life changes! Woohoo! www.icanslay.com 🌀✨

  • @ilmasaavedra3954
    @ilmasaavedra3954 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I better pray for my narcissist. He was rejected as a child, poor little one.x

  • @infinitemight7040
    @infinitemight7040 3 ปีที่แล้ว +899

    Some empaths really do have the ability to destroy the narcissists if they wanted to, but they're just holding it back.

    • @user-nh6kl6zo1u
      @user-nh6kl6zo1u 3 ปีที่แล้ว +103

      This is very true, especially when you have child with them. You hold back so they don't hurt your child.

    • @lucyparsonage6907
      @lucyparsonage6907 3 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      YES

    • @soniabernatchez7466
      @soniabernatchez7466 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      yep

    • @deemetoo2231
      @deemetoo2231 3 ปีที่แล้ว +34

      Not this empath.... Empathy mixed with basic humane common sense....and humility... I can't hold shyt back calm cool n collected too

    • @andreshermosa1633
      @andreshermosa1633 3 ปีที่แล้ว +35

      Yass!!..like me I'm not to play because I'm very spiritual and I'm a scorpio and will literally put him on this place. If I was to go that far I could with ease. But I hold back alot because I let the universe and karma get to him

  • @skidfrog
    @skidfrog 3 ปีที่แล้ว +894

    I heard one expert say.....the magic word is "whatever". There is nothing a narcissist hates more than being dismissed or ignored.

    • @AnnaLVajda
      @AnnaLVajda 3 ปีที่แล้ว +55

      Yeah but they like to play games even one word they will retaliate by doing something drastic for attention like assault even. In my experience you have to leave not play their game at all because the deck is stacked and you can't win.

    • @nikkischrader8822
      @nikkischrader8822 2 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      @@AnnaLVajda sad huh

    • @spacejinkies
      @spacejinkies 2 ปีที่แล้ว +31

      @@AnnaLVajda you just really can't win with them it's tragic

    • @daltenmorris5072
      @daltenmorris5072 2 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      I never knew what his was but I have had a narcissist mother all my life and my boss brought it to my attehow she was acting towards me and how she guilts me to get money or anything and now I’m wowed how well this actually works don’t feed into them that grinds the duck out of her gears but I wish me and her could have a good relationship but she said I don’t do anything for her I just re done every bit of electrical in her house from breaker box to plug ins to new fans and I work on her car I also mow her grass I mean there’s a lot but she wants money but she’ll buy drugs instead so I won’t directly give her money I buy what she needs

    • @mrsdubenxasana8619
      @mrsdubenxasana8619 2 ปีที่แล้ว +22

      @@daltenmorris5072 I can relate sound like my daughter I do everything for her send her private schools she dropped now an adult still look after her and her son . She will say I never there for her never done nothing for her . I don’t give her money anymore because she does drugs with her boyfriend. So now I blocked her I’m done I’m tired

  • @angelawatts4390
    @angelawatts4390 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    1) Brutal honesty.
    2)Pushing back.
    3)Exposing them.

    • @RebeccaZungEsq
      @RebeccaZungEsq  3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      This might help you better >>> www.icanslay.com

  • @cventer838
    @cventer838 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +22

    Brutal Honesty. I was born that way... 😆
    Pushing back. Exposing them.... all good. But you have to be very careful when exposing a narcissist. There will always be a come back. Losing control, exactly! Isn't it simply the best thing to just ignore them, avoid them, and go no contact as far as possible? If it is family or friends, it might be a bit easier than a spouse!

    • @RebeccaZungEsq
      @RebeccaZungEsq  3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      If you are so sick of the drama, trauma, and chaos- and want real powerful strategies for success - I’ve got the answer for you - sign up for our free webinar and start your transformative journey- this is the day your life changes! Woohoo! www.icanslay.com 🌀✨

  • @DivineSimply
    @DivineSimply 4 ปีที่แล้ว +867

    When the narcissist starts tearing you down and telling you everything that's wrong with you - which they always will - just nod & agree with everything. And when they're done, tell them you realize you're just not worthy of someone like them and you're going to do the decent thing and remove yourself from their life so they can find someone they deserve. And then wish them well & walk out.- and mean it. They don't come equipped to handle this kind of thing.

    • @strangebutfunny7179
      @strangebutfunny7179 4 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      I have a friend in high school who is a narcissist and I need help with him this has helped

    • @cinderfuckingrella8747
      @cinderfuckingrella8747 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      😂😂😂

    • @DivineSimply
      @DivineSimply 4 ปีที่แล้ว +59

      @@strangebutfunny7179 Good luck. You can do it. There's some comedy in this tactic, and this brand of humor is NOT in their repertoire. It disarms them and leaves them totally without ammunition. And you get to walk away empowered, with your head up. I tried this recently and it worked.

    • @anewchapter1336
      @anewchapter1336 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      @@DivineSimply Great advice!

    • @Whitedove6
      @Whitedove6 4 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      What a great idea...never considered that before...it does sound good.

  • @bradcroy7904
    @bradcroy7904 4 ปีที่แล้ว +733

    Having self confidence I've found is very upsetting to the narcissist

    • @normg2242
      @normg2242 4 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      Amen...!!!

    • @shirleyellinger
      @shirleyellinger 4 ปีที่แล้ว +24

      100% yes

    • @stevec3892
      @stevec3892 4 ปีที่แล้ว +27

      I’m a narcissist and I hate it . We want to keep them down and not better than us

    • @OXIR
      @OXIR 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@stevec3892 lol. Is human born narcissism or they become one? Can they heal?

    • @stevec3892
      @stevec3892 4 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      U G Official my parents were the ultimate narcissist. My father would ignore everyone unless he wanted something and my mother would just tear apart everyone especially if they do better . Both still alive and haven’t talk to them in 20 years . My older sisters are the same . Of course being the youngest I all their crap handed down . It’s tough but it’s a struggle every day

  • @spawnjg
    @spawnjg 2 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    I remember when I told my ex, you're a pathological liar. She just stood there in awe. Her stories constantly changed, it was so maddening.

  • @therealcomradd
    @therealcomradd ปีที่แล้ว +30

    Used to go toe to toe with my ex wife who’s also a narcissist. It just ended in me getting cussed out and alienated in the process. Ended up trying the grey rock method and it worked much better. We have kids together so it’s a lot harder to navigate the dynamics but not making myself so accessible and workings on myself, mentally physically and spiritually helped empower me to stand firm in my beliefs

    • @kibbo86
      @kibbo86 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Right on brother. Five months into the process so far

    • @RebeccaZungEsq
      @RebeccaZungEsq  3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      If you are so sick of the drama, trauma, and chaos- and want real powerful strategies for success - I’ve got the answer for you - sign up for our free webinar and start your transformative journey- this is the day your life changes! Woohoo! www.icanslay.com 🌀✨

  • @adammartin8026
    @adammartin8026 4 ปีที่แล้ว +529

    It's funny how much my memory has improved since I left my ex

    • @mtshyna
      @mtshyna 3 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      So soo true. I left a five year relationship with one and suddenly I feel so liberated and can remember al their bs more clearly now lol

    • @didijean7735
      @didijean7735 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Thats crazy lol

    • @newarkeveryday2794
      @newarkeveryday2794 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Yes u probably have CPTSD

    • @jensbasement3862
      @jensbasement3862 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Same here. I feel like I can remember books of shit, books that have helped me understand how fowl and intrepid these ppl really are. In fact I feel like I've shed pounds of bullshit and tumors from my mind that they tried so hard to repress.

    • @CatherineSTodd
      @CatherineSTodd 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Do it: LOL - absolutely! And I'm not emotionally "crazy" or "exploding" anymore either. Who knew?

  • @CJ-hn8kq
    @CJ-hn8kq 3 ปีที่แล้ว +510

    My Narc would get mad at me for being upset about something he did.

    • @cindyzander2448
      @cindyzander2448 3 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      My husband constantly does this

    • @yoseflopez4897
      @yoseflopez4897 3 ปีที่แล้ว +32

      They can't be held accountable for their bad behavior. They have to be innocent at all times.

    • @nabinvlogs4989
      @nabinvlogs4989 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Thats not narssissism totally

    • @yoseflopez4897
      @yoseflopez4897 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@nabinvlogs4989 It's an aspect

    • @kristenharper8464
      @kristenharper8464 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@nabinvlogs4989 wat do u mean?

  • @gailwaxman2471
    @gailwaxman2471 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Thanks so much so helpful. I just found out my Narcissist husband of 21 years led a double life

  • @AnonYmous-hp7qd
    @AnonYmous-hp7qd ปีที่แล้ว +3

    A narsissist will lie about something they have already admitted to and then say the first time is when they were actually lying.

  • @christinesmith8721
    @christinesmith8721 4 ปีที่แล้ว +490

    The only way to deal with a narcissistic person is have no contact forever if that's possible! 🤔

    • @missangiee66
      @missangiee66 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Once you call them out and they realize they cannot manipulate you, control the narrative & lose their flying monkeys they will drop you like a hot potato. It's been 8 glorious years since the hubby, his brother & wife & I have had to deal with the mother-in-law. The rest of the family kept telling her to fix it but if she did then she would have to admit her actions and again, it's been 8 years. =)

    • @allthingscoolchick3888
      @allthingscoolchick3888 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      It’s not. Trying to figure out how to avoid him tomorrow...

    • @jessg4073
      @jessg4073 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      And what if they're your parent? 😂

    • @dmknight08
      @dmknight08 4 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      I couldn’t agree more. I’ve been married to mine for 14 years and I have a kid with him but I’ve finally woken up after finally having the last piece of my inner self robbed from me and destroyed. I’ve filed for a divorce (first time taking it that far). But once I get out from his grip, I don’t ever want to see his face or even speak his name again. His son doesn’t even like him as a person, at all. And my boy is the sweetest and shyest kid if that tells you anything t about the quality of my hush band’s character. Unfortunately, my son was smart enough to figure out that his dad never wanted anything to do with him, he was only a tool to keep me at home and dependent on the narcissist who also refused to allow me to work and no access to the finances and was made to ask for money here and there. It was all how he so perfectly crafted my artificial world to keep me bottled up inside. I’ve had a couple black eyes along the way as well and I look at myself every day wondering how this could’ve happened to me. “Why am I here?” I ask because I was always a free spirit and I depended on no one before him. When me and my husband got together, he actually moved into my downtown Tulsa apartment. I used to be so proud of my work ethic and my ambition. I was going places for sure! Now I’m 40 and I feel like a useless failure in all but being a mother. I try not to ever let my boy know that I’m so broken inside and I always put on a smile for him and comfort him when his dad is yelling and saying awe full things about me in front of him. It’s no wonder he hates him I guess. I’ve made excuses for his dad long enough. I’m not religious for obvious reasons, but if you are and it works, please give a prayer for me and my boy as well as all the other moms and dads trapped in abusive relationships with psychotic narcissist spouses. We need a god to help us achieve what feels impossible, leaving in one piece.

    • @tiffbeevachou108
      @tiffbeevachou108 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Yes! It's the best. It sucks that they continue to smear your name, but true friends and smart family know the truth

  • @ChrisDishman
    @ChrisDishman 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2127

    Who wants to make a bet that all the thumbs down people are pissed off narcissist. LOL

  • @tamatirogerson6421
    @tamatirogerson6421 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    Thank you for fighting the good fight - these parasitic creatures are everywhere and need to be brought under control like rats and wasps

    • @RebeccaZungEsq
      @RebeccaZungEsq  3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      If you are so sick of the drama, trauma, and chaos- and want real powerful strategies for success - I’ve got the answer for you - sign up for our free webinar and start your transformative journey- this is the day your life changes! Woohoo! www.icanslay.com 🌀✨

  • @user-tl6ds8mp4x
    @user-tl6ds8mp4x 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

    #3 ALL THE WAY. I once played "psychic" by email, pointing out all that I "saw" in her "aura," etc. - "Something happened to you in adolescence that caused you to feel inferior to others, and you began to overcompensate." "Your aura is so thick with layers that you don't quite know who you are anymore." This was all under the guise of caring - and I never saw her or heard from her again. (They'll HIDE from you if you can pull this off!)

  • @penelope-oe2vr
    @penelope-oe2vr 3 ปีที่แล้ว +243

    They lie about dumb things, just because they feel like they're "smarter" than you if they get away with it. Its an ego booster for them too.

    • @toasto
      @toasto 3 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      yeah I hate when they do that. Like lying about something as benign as what type of bread they ate in the morning. It serves no purpose to lie about, but they get so giddy when you were silly enough to "believe" that they ate rye bread instead of whole grain! They then call you so gullible and stupid for falling for it. lol. they're like 5 year olds

    • @yoseflopez4897
      @yoseflopez4897 3 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      Then get all butt hurt when you call them out and go into a fit of rage for recognizing that they're lying.....

    • @beckk8863
      @beckk8863 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      yep, remember mine waving an engraved keyring at me, telling me his daughter got him it. No prompting. It was a really odd engraved message, not appropriate between father and daughter. I began to think he had some weird relationship with her but didn't question it. Can't believe I didn't cotton on that he was married but I didn't. He was smarter than me I guess. If smart is being a lying psycho and dumb is being trusting.

    • @LOOTLORD605
      @LOOTLORD605 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      lol. what a weak ass they are.

    • @juliebeebe34
      @juliebeebe34 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      OMG, Right!?!?!?! I am juuuuust about to lose my crap, due to mostly just the lying alone! How on Earth can he look me right in the eyes, so effortlessly, and lie and lie and lie....even after being caught in such a small, stupid lie?!?!? 🙃 😢

  • @amandacausey9450
    @amandacausey9450 4 ปีที่แล้ว +214

    Brutal honesty makes them go to silent treatment

    • @ThatHealedSoul
      @ThatHealedSoul 4 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      I am on silent treatment with a narcissist but believe they won't care..
      Nothing can ever be good enough!

    • @elainewilhelm5487
      @elainewilhelm5487 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      So true Amanda!

    • @nikkikells8791
      @nikkikells8791 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Priya Jain 🤷🏾‍♀️ Welcome to the club, it’s every other day or week on silent treatment.

    • @adose_of_Tequila
      @adose_of_Tequila 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Amanda Causey something I’m dealing with now my bf shuts down whenever I hit him with brutal honesty

    • @FlyingHamsterRocket
      @FlyingHamsterRocket 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      YES IT DOES!!

  • @richarddegaetano9208
    @richarddegaetano9208 ปีที่แล้ว +59

    Thank you for your expertise and helpful information. I have been married for 32 years and I feel like I'm just learning that I have been a fool for a covert narcissist! This is so painful and embarrassing but with videos like this, I am trying to make sense of my life and hopefully someday be happy before she completely kills my spirit and my mental health! God bless you 🙏

    • @harrietjames6063
      @harrietjames6063 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      I was raised by a narcissist and married one. 52 yrs of hell and never realized it because i thought it was normal. I’m fighting now. I’ve worked my a$$ off and made lots of money that he wants half of even though he getting senile. We’re living in Mexico. So, I’m leaving in the morning. He’ll follow because he’ll think he’s going to lose me. The only place I’ll meet with him is at our old Attorney’s office. He’s got to be evaluated to see if he’s competent. The lies are piling up on him. And I’ll get my revenge on what he’s done to me.

    • @everyonelovesstel
      @everyonelovesstel ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@harrietjames6063 proud of you ❤️ hope that it works in your favor

    • @Itchy1958
      @Itchy1958 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Hi Richard, I to have been married to a narcissist for 36 years. Gone is my humor, drive, ambition etc.. I was at the end of my rope 10 years ago. I know it’s about to get ugly and pain is on the way. But I have to move on. I was going to give her another chance but what is the sense.

    • @bellabothma9655
      @bellabothma9655 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      They ruin lives…with lies and deceptions…😰🥵

    • @bellabothma9655
      @bellabothma9655 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@harrietjames6063…Me too…we didn’t know the difference…it seemed normal…😭

  • @MEMMS
    @MEMMS 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +13

    Totally! I got manipulated into buying a home, having a child and getting married all so she could return to not working, not helping and physically beating me until it hurt less to leave than stay. Only connected the dots in last two weeks and trying to know how to cope

    • @kathleenmorris9309
      @kathleenmorris9309 9 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Counselling in abundance

    • @Life_of_pi3
      @Life_of_pi3 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      Sorry to hear & wishing you strength and health to heal yourself and deal with the narcissistic asswipe & put them in their place..

    • @NoName-zb1gm
      @NoName-zb1gm 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      This is very common for women. They get married have kids buy a house then they kick the husband out and get custody of the kids so they get to keep the house. Men need to call this out so women know we know.

    • @xdaydreamerx
      @xdaydreamerx 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Many women want a divorce because they dont get any help from the husband with raising the kids. They are exhausted and desperate and the husband is like another child that they have to take care off. Than they figure that they might as well just raise them by themselves because they are already doing it alone anyway. Many men still see women as a their maid, nanny, sextoy and mother. Wheres the respect.Ofcourse there will also be women who are really bad and manipulative but the majority of women just dont accept this treatment anymore.@@NoName-zb1gm

    • @xdaydreamerx
      @xdaydreamerx 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Taking care of children and the house is also work. Im worried about the child if shes this agressive. I hope shell not use the child to hurt you. Good that you got away.

  • @luqmanhakimhabibullah7865
    @luqmanhakimhabibullah7865 3 ปีที่แล้ว +254

    how ironic, us empath feels we're becoming more of a narcisist when were stading out to fight the narcisist.

    • @momocyrine
      @momocyrine 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Its true. Please dont be and save yourself. It is not a good thing to become. You will never be fully satisfied with this caracter. I broke up with my ex 5 years ago didnt have any pity for him but i loved him. When i reached out last year , i was more mature and ready to fix things up , found out that he wasnt the same person and it was me who created this dark side of him .. then broke up with me and did everything i did to him. ( i have changed and i dont blame myself for what happened 5 years ago i was totally immature)

    • @edithcasines9550
      @edithcasines9550 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Roy Savage my history is different I was a person that grew up very poor, and because of that I gave everything to my daughters because I want them to have a better life, now my daughter has three kids and she had them late in her life she’ll be 48, I was there for her hand and foot gave her money gave him my time gave him my life in other words she grew up privileged, I am a senior citizen suffering so much, and because I have different opinion in the political issues both of them hate me with a passion, I thought I was allowed to think and use my brain, and if that is A crime I didn’t know I am very naïve person and I am very empath I care I’m religious and I love to help people I gave 3 gallons of blood since I was a young girl, now my daughter is torturing me mentally, I have many accidents because I was always running to help them with the babies I have five fractures in my body right now I need money to pay my rent because I had the virus and I had to get medication, I gave her all my savings naughty one time but little by little, I she won’t let me see my grandkids which they love me I don’t like to go to her house to watch them because she always has an angry face and I don’t like it, The kids love me because I play with them like I was five years old even though I have horrible arthritis and broken bones, she asked me to lend her my car, and because she ruined it the last time she used it cost me $1500, I said no I’ll drive you, she said to me she doesn’t wanna be next to me because I give her stress, she gives me stress I’m on medication right now I’m having therapy I think she’s bipolar she needs therapy and she talks to me horrible she did not Listen to me to me she made horrible choices she found a boyfriend that used her in abused her and that’s 43 she decided to have babies, and I think she hates me and she tell me I don’t exist and I need help now to pay my rent she said no and I have to sell my jewelry the little bit that I have because she took some it, it’s true I lost all my friends she told everybody that I was a bad mother that I used to beat them they believe her because she talks to them with honey, even my best friend she’s always reproaching me telling me she loves you, do you know why because she talks to her like oh how are you Kissy Kissy, so now the only person I can speak to is my sister because she knows my situation and because my daughter also rejected her, I never had grandparents because they stayed in the old country my grandkids have a grandmother who adore them she doesn’t want me to see them, please answer me, but don’t make it public because I’m afraid of her!!!

    • @edithcasines9550
      @edithcasines9550 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      I don’t tell her what she says to everybody I’m a liar to her own father she brainwashed him and I’m Father’s Day she gave me a card saying happy Father’s Day mother because you were my mother and my father I love you, she forgot all the good things I did for them because I took the key from my apartment and I don’t give her the car anymore because she ruined it and now I don’t have money she hates me!!!

    • @edithcasines9550
      @edithcasines9550 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      I exposed her and she told everybody my political view now they all run away from me like I’m a monster or I have leprosy it’s horrible you want or I can do that to a mother who grew up so poor so poor, when I came to this country at 16 was the first time I heard TV FrigidaireAnd a birthday cake I never heard that before that’s why I gave them everything I wanted to be a good mother I didn’t know I was doing something wrong in my heart I thought it was doing them a favor to have a piano in ballet and sweet 16 so many things I gave them no I’m all alone

    • @enoonmaienoemosmai1624
      @enoonmaienoemosmai1624 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Thank you so much for saying this

  • @sassydog104
    @sassydog104 3 ปีที่แล้ว +333

    I lived with a covert narcissist for nine years. I’m now nine months free. 💃🏼

    • @cheryallenjenkins9800
      @cheryallenjenkins9800 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Congratulations x

    • @GinjaFajr
      @GinjaFajr 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Honestly, congratulations💕

    • @sassydog104
      @sassydog104 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @@cheryallenjenkins9800 Thank you 🙏. It’s been the hardest time of my life but I will get through this.

    • @sassydog104
      @sassydog104 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@sarahkelsey4287 Thank you! 😊

    • @sassydog104
      @sassydog104 3 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      @@GinjaFajr Thank you...only people who have lived with narcissists truly understand.

  • @RissaFirecat
    @RissaFirecat 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    I was love-bombed by a narcissist last night. It was the empties hug I have ever received. You were right. All my ducks will be in a row the next time I see her and her flying monkey. Thank you for your help!!

  • @robert49rml
    @robert49rml ปีที่แล้ว +9

    All these years I didn’t realize the closest people to me were narcissists until your presentations. Many thanks.

    • @susanazinger2525
      @susanazinger2525 ปีที่แล้ว

      Same here ...4 yrs. of trauma therapy showed me who was who .. it took me awhile to process it . Heartbreaking .

  • @projectmcsquare2149
    @projectmcsquare2149 4 ปีที่แล้ว +180

    It’s ok they can think I’m insane... as long as they stay away from me

  • @theharringtons2010
    @theharringtons2010 3 ปีที่แล้ว +348

    The only time I saw my ex panic was when he knew I was leaving for good and the hoover did not work..the biggest hurt for me was realizing that I knew absolutely nothing about the man I married, that he was a complete fake, a con artist liar who really did not have one drop of love or respect for me..

    • @susanhewitt6359
      @susanhewitt6359 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@mypups7626 so true.

    • @angelomiaris3363
      @angelomiaris3363 3 ปีที่แล้ว +39

      My stomach just turned reading this , I've been with mine for 8 years ,married 3 and living together for 1 1/2 years 😳.I don't know who this person is but it's not who I met , it's absolutely scarry what the difference is

    • @BecomingFelicia
      @BecomingFelicia 3 ปีที่แล้ว +25

      I relate to you 100%. Im trying to leave my narc husband now. I need to be strong.

    • @Pace8260
      @Pace8260 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Yep. Not a drop.

    • @taniachara77
      @taniachara77 3 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      @@BecomingFelicia Do it afraid, if you wait to be strong that moment might never come because strength usually comes after the action, not before. You’ll be surprised at how strong you are AFTER walking away.

  • @kimoanamusic8533
    @kimoanamusic8533 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Please be careful. I confronted the narc when he swore at me one night and he hit me, ragdolled me by the hair, threw me down and screamed in my face. I absolutely lost it and he backed off. He told me to calm down and stop acting crazy. Called me a fucking lunatic and a psycho. Just please be careful!

  • @nicholecornes1915
    @nicholecornes1915 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    Dont let them intimate you! You have to stand up

    • @RebeccaZungEsq
      @RebeccaZungEsq  3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      If you are so sick of the drama, trauma, and chaos- and want real powerful strategies for success - I’ve got the answer for you - sign up for our free webinar and start your transformative journey- this is the day your life changes! Woohoo! www.icanslay.com 🌀✨

  • @natashaevsimon1441
    @natashaevsimon1441 4 ปีที่แล้ว +173

    When you are brutally honest with them,
    They know exactly what to do with that.
    They use it against you or they turn the truth into lies.

    • @LoveNLife700
      @LoveNLife700 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      True.. happened to me while married to a narc. They don't respect truth. Better to lie to them...smh

    • @ushamgr4588
      @ushamgr4588 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Omg this exactly how my grandma is ....

    • @veras1228
      @veras1228 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Yes

    • @yooinnashi30
      @yooinnashi30 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      So true! Damn it !

    • @nadianazri6330
      @nadianazri6330 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Oh god, what if I have been honest abt my feeling while he was in denial and don't want to be blamed at all. I was willing to take the blame because I realized there is no good arguing with a fool or egoist. I just want to walk away. So how to fix this. Help me guys.

  • @drpeemac
    @drpeemac 4 ปีที่แล้ว +165

    Nothing can fix them, why waste your energy instead care for those who really care for you.
    Its a very fine line between psychopaths and narcissist...

    • @felicitanolten5993
      @felicitanolten5993 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      You're so right..! 💖🙏😇
      Like my own biologic "psycho dad", i forgave him but i never ever want him back in my life.!

    • @suzannemorrow9987
      @suzannemorrow9987 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      My son is one of their flying monkeys . Difficult . He dismisses me lies threatens to keep my granddaughter from me. Took my inheritance from the Narcs. Denies it but I know.

    • @krystalwaters5943
      @krystalwaters5943 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@suzannemorrow9987 So sad that even our own family members can be driven by greed. Let karma catch up with them whilst you enjoy living your life as a good person. Try to remember that all of the good things in life are free eg. scenic nature walks with the awe factor with true friends by your side xo

  • @lucygreene6401
    @lucygreene6401 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    TOTALLY. Yes they are empty on the inside. And yes, they are bullies.

  • @hotlava06
    @hotlava06 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Comfort in knowing the game plan. This literally stopped me from being emotionally abused. I did every step and turned the situation in my favor. In the midst of all of that the narcissist became unattractive with her childish behavior and I ended the relationship with ease! Good luck all

  • @roxywestbridge
    @roxywestbridge 3 ปีที่แล้ว +113

    Making a narc panic will result in the narc displaying a higher level of heinousness toward you. You'll be astounded when you witness how depraved they really are.

    • @dalesmith4609
      @dalesmith4609 3 ปีที่แล้ว +28

      I think that too, they get their kicks off of one upping you, and they're really good at it!! they've had alot of experience and practice. Best tactic is to cut ties, and stand firm with the decision. You'll be at risk of turning into a monster yourself if you play the game with them.

    • @CAMILAAMORIMB
      @CAMILAAMORIMB 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      True

    • @cherias.4069
      @cherias.4069 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@dalesmith4609 --So Correct Dale!🎯💪✌💖

    • @megangarcia7555
      @megangarcia7555 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Yep, the moment I stood up for myself, my ex started doing all kinds of stuff. He started being more obvious

    • @luckied7542
      @luckied7542 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Yep. Make certain you install a camera beforehand.

  • @jamesgeist9535
    @jamesgeist9535 3 ปีที่แล้ว +125

    Brutal honesty is pointless in my situation because the denial mechanism is constant.

    • @Odo55
      @Odo55 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      You're right and actually a waste of precious energy.

    • @sasibudiyanto2599
      @sasibudiyanto2599 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      If you provide enough documented evidences, they will be stunned. It helped tremendously in my case. And Do not listen to their denials. After showing the evidences, leave them for good.

    • @tinab3627
      @tinab3627 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Same with mine

    • @waynethang9034
      @waynethang9034 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Same with mine as well. Despite overwhelming evidence she still just denies denies denies. It's just stupid at this point.

    • @sasibudiyanto2599
      @sasibudiyanto2599 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      I might need to add that I face da group of narc fam, buat some of them are normal. So, the evidences stunned the narc, make them panicked because they were exposed, and let the normals contemplated of what the narcs have done to my family.
      For individual narc, this might not be very effective. I agree...

  • @michaelb6729
    @michaelb6729 2 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    7:18 . . . so true !
    I caused a narcissistic injury by being honest with a covert narc I was dating.
    I was honest with her in understanding her single mother struggles and that I cared for her.
    Man, that stabbed her right in her ego ! I didn't even mean to do it - I was being honest with her trying to figure out where the relationship was heading.

    • @RuthlessEd51
      @RuthlessEd51 ปีที่แล้ว

      What happened??

    • @istj66360
      @istj66360 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I definitely understand where you're coming from brothwe. I had a narc friend that I'd only try to be nice to and look out for because I felt sorry for her. Sometimes she'd take it as a personal attack and fly off the handle for long periods of time. And could she ever fly off the handle. We can't win for losing with people like them and it didn't take me long to see it wasn't even worth my time trying. I don't know if you still have feelings for yours so please don't take this the wrong way but women like that will lead us to an early grave. Their problems are their problems, not ours. We're better off without them even if it means being alone.

  • @gayleraven1559
    @gayleraven1559 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Totally. Oh my god the tone. I have to be so cheery when I talk back. Now I don't care.

  • @ryanyork837
    @ryanyork837 2 ปีที่แล้ว +269

    Never underestimate the fact that a narcissist will always destroy themselves in the long run it may not happen in your lifetime or in the time you know them but Mark my words they find their downfall downfall soon enough

    • @Respect2theFallen
      @Respect2theFallen 2 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      Truer words never spoken. Especially if you know their life & how miserable they are it's best to let them wallow in their misery & move on so they don't take you under when you're in their fortress.

    • @mightyseagoat6874
      @mightyseagoat6874 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      I think my brother will kill me , so I wont see that happening (he tried doing that when I was a baby... He is not only a narcissist, but and insane and very agressive + childish one)

    • @Respect2theFallen
      @Respect2theFallen 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@mightyseagoat6874 smh the worst combination. I've recently discovered some people are aware something is off with my narcissist but don't exactly know but a few people are skeptical of them despite being cordial and the narc being super friendly with them. I had no clue people were suspect of her. I'm glad they are and I hope she gets exposed and gets help she desperately needs it.

    • @mightyseagoat6874
      @mightyseagoat6874 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@Respect2theFallen you mean your sister? (You said "her")
      My brother for example pretends to be super friendly with people , so does my mothwr , but when they are together they talk sh*t about everyone, the worst. They are very aggresive at home and abusive. Making drama about everything. Caring a lot about appearances etc

    • @Respect2theFallen
      @Respect2theFallen 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@mightyseagoat6874 Nah not sister I dont have one. It's just a her in general they seem like easier people to play victims that's why it's annoying.

  • @770daniel
    @770daniel 3 ปีที่แล้ว +141

    Number 5: when the “target” starts having a satisfying Life and the narc realizes that the victims didnt give up of themselves.

    • @Autumn_Forest_
      @Autumn_Forest_ 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      YES!!! THIS!!! My sister and I have both done this, and it drives the narcissists insane!

    • @jannabailey2720
      @jannabailey2720 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Living my best life has destroyed them. 🥰😁🙃

    • @770daniel
      @770daniel 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      They freak out and go find another victim in order to “regulate” their emotions. They cant stand peace and stability...

  • @cmh8241
    @cmh8241 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Totally! Realizing I have a "friend" that does this repeatedly, but I keep letting it go because, "they're stressed."

    • @RebeccaZungEsq
      @RebeccaZungEsq  10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Stay strong! ❤
      Join me in my free webinar - icanslay.com

    • @chriscogley7216
      @chriscogley7216 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Don't let it go

    • @cmh8241
      @cmh8241 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@chriscogley7216 Happy to report that I'm not friends with that person anymore!

  • @lucybraun8969
    @lucybraun8969 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I have found that brutal honesty only results in more twisting of my words, leaving out of critical related in ch ormation, or just out and out bullying and raging to try and intimidate & devalue me. The last thing I want is an extended verbal brawl with that beast. Unless it's critical to get information conveyed, I remain silent, & only convey critical information in writing with critical witnesses copied on the communication.

  • @denisewhisler5536
    @denisewhisler5536 3 ปีที่แล้ว +245

    And then they STICK to that lie even when they're caught in the lie! NUTS!

    • @yoseflopez4897
      @yoseflopez4897 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      This is both an annoying and entertaining thing to witness. They'll start rambling hoping to confuse you as they change the subject. Then they'll accuse you of changing the subject when you make it known that they're the ones drifting.

    • @juliebeebe34
      @juliebeebe34 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @@yoseflopez4897 wow! It's as if I wrote this comment!! I am EXHAUSTED from keeping up w/his lie, after lie, after lie--just to then listen to him weasel his was around trying to change the topic...ugh 😠😢

    • @yoseflopez4897
      @yoseflopez4897 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@juliebeebe34 What I started doing is remembering the original topic and the first new topic they drifted off to. That way when they starting accusing I would just say "No, actually...", then they sometimes respond with the whole "Are you calling me a liar?" crap. Lol this is where I would just say "yes" so they could just ramble themselves out of the argument.

    • @juliebeebe34
      @juliebeebe34 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@yoseflopez4897 oh? Very smart! Yesterday, during a "run-around argument", I call them, I spouted out, "I should grap a pen & paper, so I can keep track of the original argument starter", LOL

    • @yoseflopez4897
      @yoseflopez4897 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@juliebeebe34 If you can try to avoid engaging in the first place with one word responses like "k". It's hard to argue when it's just you.

  • @MrsTinrib
    @MrsTinrib 4 ปีที่แล้ว +141

    It’s like they are all the same person, they’re so text-book predictable. Mine is an escalating nightmare of gaslighting, lies and manipulation.

    • @annekerotterdam7499
      @annekerotterdam7499 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      It's a personality disorder....

    • @azamudio128
      @azamudio128 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Im ,so worn out!!!😭...God help me,is my prayers.

    • @stephaniea1185
      @stephaniea1185 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      My God, you’re right! They aren’t even real people. Just cardboard cutouts!

    • @annekerotterdam7499
      @annekerotterdam7499 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@stephaniea1185 they are people..!!

    • @dmknight08
      @dmknight08 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Funny I just left a comment about how predictable they are. I think it’s their top true quality over all, only being a mammal comes in second.

  • @user-pk7nq4ng6n
    @user-pk7nq4ng6n 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Totally!!! He actually said to me that Everyone he knows says he's such a nice & great guy! Lmao!! I looked him straight in the eyes & laughed & said, NO YOUR NOT A GREAT GUY OR A NICE GUY. 😂

    • @RebeccaZungEsq
      @RebeccaZungEsq  3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      If you are so sick of the drama, trauma, and chaos- and want real powerful strategies for success - I’ve got the answer for you - sign up for our free webinar and start your transformative journey- this is the day your life changes! Woohoo! www.icanslay.com 🌀✨

  • @bxsoto69
    @bxsoto69 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    Thank you so much for your advice it has helped me a lot. I was blind folded by him 😢

    • @RebeccaZungEsq
      @RebeccaZungEsq  3 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      This might help you better > www.icanslay.com

  • @sunflower5749
    @sunflower5749 4 ปีที่แล้ว +96

    1. Brutal honesty @7:20
    2. Pushing back
    3. Exposing them
    Signed, your ADHD friend.

    • @tea2it33
      @tea2it33 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      4. Losing Control
      Signed, another ADHD friend. 🙂

    • @catherinea.frazier3370
      @catherinea.frazier3370 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Amazing thank you

    • @BestLife101
      @BestLife101 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Thank you.

  • @kez-chick5647
    @kez-chick5647 3 ปีที่แล้ว +163

    This is exactly what happened to me, actually thought I was mentally insane.

    • @TN-kz2ox
      @TN-kz2ox 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Gaslightning

    • @icalvin4263
      @icalvin4263 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I felt this way for years

    • @Jezebel066
      @Jezebel066 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I feel the same. I just wonder if he believed his narrative. But I know he doesn’t. Bc, if he told me that this person or that person was there & heard it his way, I would be like, oh wow. I’m sorry. But he just says they’re crazy or liars. If I have a recording to prove I didn’t say something, he hears that he was wrong, I didn’t.. He will switch to telling me how I pushed his buttons to make him sound bad on the recording & there we go arguing about me defending myself

    • @christianpulisic7784
      @christianpulisic7784 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Kerryn 56,You are beautiful 🌹🌷,you don't need a narc 😈 in your life!!

    • @dawnlucas3775
      @dawnlucas3775 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Me too 🥺

  • @dextercope3214
    @dextercope3214 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Totally, my wife is the narcissist. I pushed back and she left me and moved to another state.

  • @AnitaPast-nr9uv
    @AnitaPast-nr9uv 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Driving me crazy is right. I’ve been able to hold my peace more and more but I still erupt at times. I’m moving because this to a place I really can’t afford but as soon as I’m away from all this I’ll quickly thrive.

  • @dustibutauddoser3904
    @dustibutauddoser3904 3 ปีที่แล้ว +237

    Totally!! Divorcing a covert narcissist of 27 years, and WINNING!!!

    • @TheMwendaa
      @TheMwendaa 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Well done!!

    • @blitzppa6092
      @blitzppa6092 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Dusti..pl share your email

    • @candywilkins386
      @candywilkins386 3 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      Dusti- I was married for 31 years to a covert- narrisst. He committed perjury in court on 3 accounts. I got almost nothing!!! I'm disabled from his abuse and he lied about the amount of home and used a tax asserors amount instead oil f the true amount of 195,400. Please be careful they will use adult children against you!!! Narrisst always play the victim!!!

    • @scottmcgill2127
      @scottmcgill2127 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Meeeee tooooooo!!!! :)

    • @stevenjenkins7056
      @stevenjenkins7056 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Best of luck!!!!!!!

  • @aleciamoore8020
    @aleciamoore8020 3 ปีที่แล้ว +216

    Every time I catch him in a lie, suddenly he's having a heart attack!

    • @alexisgonzales2958
      @alexisgonzales2958 3 ปีที่แล้ว +26

      Mine had a full-blown panic attack on the stand during cross-examination. The lies he told were presented to him & it was a beautiful thing. It was 3 days. I refused to look at him & I had zero reaction to him. Drove him crazy. LOL!

    • @TitianTexan
      @TitianTexan 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@alexisgonzales2958 Awesome!!!

    • @halliehere
      @halliehere 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Mine vomited when I forced him to let me drive...

    • @ThePriam3
      @ThePriam3 3 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      😂😂😂😂😂 it’s not funny.. but aren’t narcs so much fun ...

    • @halliehere
      @halliehere 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@ThePriam3 😭😭😭😭 no! Lol

  • @patriciasaucier-chapman1588
    @patriciasaucier-chapman1588 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    It is completely shocking how totally spot on you are about these narcissists. I have been called a liar continually when I am known to be too honest with everyone. I exposed mine to a whole community of people here in Mexico. I was at my wits end. I had no choice. I was having my physical and financial stability threatened and needed to let as many people as possible know what was happening. Thankfully I was received without any doubt by many people. He has his flying monkeys but no one came back to me with any negativity. You are so right that they do not want to go to court. They have lined up weak mediators who they have already convinced they are the victim to mediate for us. I have told him we need to go to someone impartial but they are highly resistant. They know I have a lot of proof of their behaviors that will come out in any serious legal venue and it is my only hope. He is trying to take everything from me. And he truly believes he deserves it. He has screwed off his whole life and has nothing. I am in another part of Mexico to escape him and his abuse. It is so much easier not dealing with his nonsense anymore. I find when I do read his texts or listen to his messages I am put into a state of inability to do anything but ruminate. I am waiting for my house sale to go through so I can take all my money and never have anything to do with him again. It is taking forever and he is threatening me in every way with anything he can think of. So ignoring him has been my best tactic. Once in a while I send some other proof of his abuse to keep him reminded. It seems to be helping but I still live in fear. I cannot wait for this to be done. My house was supposed to close by now and having the buyers dragging their feet is killing me. But I am hanging in there. It has been too difficult to find honest help here in Mexico. When they discover the value of the house they want a portion of it as well. I would happily pay a fair amount to have good council but I don't believe it is available to me here.

    • @RebeccaZungEsq
      @RebeccaZungEsq  10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Stay strong! ❤
      Join me in my free webinar - icanslay.com

  • @robingomsi4300
    @robingomsi4300 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    I know that you did this video 2 years ago, but thank you so much! Everything you say is exactly what I'm dealing with. Thank you so much for what you do. ❤️

  • @susanblaski3552
    @susanblaski3552 4 ปีที่แล้ว +235

    There might have been a time where I wanted to take the wind out of my narcissist's sails, but that isn't my desire any more. Continuing to engage and play all the games isn't what I want to do. I'd rather exit stage left and get on with my life. Difficult for sure as this person is a family member. I'm done with all this nonsense. Seriously, no one is worth your inner peace, no one!

    • @TheShivaspirit
      @TheShivaspirit 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Couldn't have said that better. Enjoy a Blessed Life

    • @redlover5088
      @redlover5088 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Unfortunately, for some, such as myself, there remains legal connections that must be dealt with. The narcissist continues to try to manipulate, control, and intimidate in connection to those situations and people. For me, once our youngest turns 18 in a few months and whenever this dang house is sold, I will no longer need or want to "take the wind out of my narcissist's sails". Until then I must protect myself by using cold, hard numbers as facts to prevent a judge from forcing me to pay the narcissist lots of money I don't have. I engage only when forced, and at least for me, this is not playing any sort of game but instead protecting myself and my assets, small may they be, from being unjustly confiscated. I look forward to the day there is no more reason, (other than to collect on the court ordered life insurance policy I have on him), to engage with him in any manner.

    • @TheShivaspirit
      @TheShivaspirit 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@redlover5088 use Clarity and come out smiling. Bless you on your journey of self discovery. Use everything even the worst, as a learning experience. Try as much not to take things these Demons do personally. This is the aspect that keeps us stuck to their negativity. We are all meant to live safe & happily, some just can't see this in their life.

    • @barbarasasyk5453
      @barbarasasyk5453 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Yup. I had to let my son and grandchildren go. His narc wife has kept us in an uproar for 13 years. I told him she's a narcissist. He knows but he stays so I'm done!!

    • @tinalusk7902
      @tinalusk7902 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Totally

  • @AliensAnonymous
    @AliensAnonymous 4 ปีที่แล้ว +284

    Best way to send them into a panic: Start talking about yourself.

    • @evabraun538
      @evabraun538 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      😂

    • @kirabarsmith9353
      @kirabarsmith9353 4 ปีที่แล้ว +71

      Oh they want to know all your fears and flaws, so they can use them against you later.

    • @WatchingMyLifeFlashB
      @WatchingMyLifeFlashB 4 ปีที่แล้ว +24

      AliensAnonymous Talk about your accomplishments, every friend that you have who they don't know, what a great yesterday you had, how well you slept, & how great today is going to be because "I'm not going to let anything or anyone mess with MY great day."
      The narcissist can't handle it. They'll immediately react. Their wheels will start turning immediately as they quickly attempt of something to say, something, anything negative.
      As soon as the first negative word comes out & long before they can finish, bluntly & boldly interrupt them with a smile, the biggest smile you've ever smiled, & say, Oh no, I'm not letting anything or anyone sour my day. Love you, but gotta go enjoy my day & love life. Smile even greater, then turn & walk away.
      And if they try to interrupt with another negative. Cover your ears & remember walk away.
      They can't handle not being in control of the conversation. They can't handle you being happy. And they can't handle be dismissed or ignored.
      And if you want to rub it in, just before you go through the exit door or are out of earshot, turn once again toward them with, again, your very biggest smile & boldly wave saying "I hope your day is just as great as mine.
      They will just about lose it once you are gone. They'll be sad, mad, aggravated, confused, enraged, & they'll even feel abused. And in the onslaught of all of these emotions, they'll panic, because have no current control & can't figure you out to regain the control they had thought that they had approached the conversation with.

    • @evabraun538
      @evabraun538 4 ปีที่แล้ว +22

      @@WatchingMyLifeFlashB "And they'll even feel abused"😂😂😂
      I died!!!

    • @ashleypulido2042
      @ashleypulido2042 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      They won’t listen

  • @musicplay664
    @musicplay664 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Totally… love this video .. renewed my strength in dealing with 2 x family members father and sister who I don’t see much now as I moved away …. Since I found this channel I thought I was crazy as I stay away and wondered why I can’t return to my hometown.. it’s the subconscious mind keeping me safe .. and away from my dysfunctional narcissistic family .. because of utube I know feel lighter and safer staying where I am .. all the behaviours you talk about I have experienced… and never understood… now I do thankfully..

  • @mohankumarr1925
    @mohankumarr1925 ปีที่แล้ว

    TOTALLY. Great video, Rebecca, you are so clear in your views. Thanks for the video. It is helping hundreds of people like me

  • @lilwinged5291
    @lilwinged5291 3 ปีที่แล้ว +242

    Having no reaction anymore...that works, you know they're gaslighting so answering with one word like K or , sorry you feel that way ect. They really know you know by then.

    • @carolannelabellekarlin440
      @carolannelabellekarlin440 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      I agree 👍

    • @charzemc
      @charzemc 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @ lil winged i have noticed this in the comments quite often so thought i might clarify, etc is the abbreviation for etcetera not ect. Are you from the US?

    • @Odo55
      @Odo55 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@charzemc It's not an American thing, just an error .

    • @Pace8260
      @Pace8260 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Deploy the “K”!!! 😂🤣

    • @fidelisgreg4978
      @fidelisgreg4978 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@Pace8260 hello how are you doing? My name is Greg

  • @opinionminnion
    @opinionminnion 4 ปีที่แล้ว +169

    Work on yourself, don't work on others.
    Emotionally mature people walk away from abusive people, that includes narcissists.
    Enlightened people have no desire to make another person panic, or to control them, in any way.

    • @nonicknamethethird2132
      @nonicknamethethird2132 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Mark Thompson beautifully said

    • @markhottman2652
      @markhottman2652 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      HEY! You have been in a 12 step program! I am powerless against ................. There is a higher power greater than your self that can change YOU while taking care of the other person. Wow, thank goodness for healthy People in delightful comments on TH-cam. Cheers to healthyness. 👍

    • @Fuschia816
      @Fuschia816 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      @Marc this describes my personality when I've dealt with a narc. Leave them lost and confused thinking why didn't their evil games work on me. I've actually become a professional narc detective from dealing with so many.

    • @menuofgrace
      @menuofgrace 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Perfect comment!

    • @ChitraJayawardena
      @ChitraJayawardena 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @Harry Munker The best comment

  • @craigreeves8510
    @craigreeves8510 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Thank you so much. I have gone No Contact. I feel like I am losing my mind. Everything you talk about makes me feel I am not alone in this fight.

    • @RebeccaZungEsq
      @RebeccaZungEsq  3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      If you are so sick of the drama, trauma, and chaos- and want real powerful strategies for success - I’ve got the answer for you - sign up for our free webinar and start your transformative journey- this is the day your life changes! Woohoo! www.icanslay.com 🌀✨

  • @Corrupted_Save_File
    @Corrupted_Save_File 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Thank you for dragging this out into the light, I was with a narcissist for years and - although I am free now - its still validating to know that the gaslighting and undermining happened, and now I know what to do if I should meet another.

    • @RebeccaZungEsq
      @RebeccaZungEsq  10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      How are you doing now? Hope you're feeling well and getting your power back! 💪
      This might help - slay.rebeccazung.com/

  • @nataliefox1776
    @nataliefox1776 3 ปีที่แล้ว +263

    Just found out my mom is one....I never even knew the definition before. My whole life is validated now!

    • @evangelle82
      @evangelle82 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Same! Except that it is my dad.

    • @roseyj5108
      @roseyj5108 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Try two mum's and two dad's 🤣🙄🤷‍♀️

    • @VikingMom1970
      @VikingMom1970 3 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      natalie fox after 32 years with my husband since age of 18, I have validation too. I never knew about this stuff back then and I am now educating myself and hopefully move on and far away.

    • @danitaavalonedemas8000
      @danitaavalonedemas8000 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Mine exhusband, father to my kids. Together 30 yrs. Still living w him because I got screwed in divorce and homeless and co. Parenting 17 and 12 yr old .he is so abusive because he doesn't want me living w him. But my 12 yr old daughter needs me

    • @danielfinch362
      @danielfinch362 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      I hope you can get away from the abuse, and build who you are as a person.

  • @Tunny6
    @Tunny6 4 ปีที่แล้ว +124

    They are kind of people that accuse you of what they themselves are guilty of doing. The best way to get them out of your life is to block all contacts with them. They are not worth your time nor energy.

    • @joanneclouser420
      @joanneclouser420 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I know and get what ur saying. So weird when they do all the certain things and then accuse you of it. This happens all the time with the Narc in my pleasantly divorced life. Yahoo so glad to be divorced only 5 more years till my daughter is 18. Counting down!! Then no more anything.

    • @pegasus5148
      @pegasus5148 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Summer; they project onto you.

    • @kimbadull6448
      @kimbadull6448 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      summer what if that person is my sister? I also have been struggling with work and money during covid so her condescension really hurts.

    • @riah9912
      @riah9912 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Yes, narcissistic projection! I call it a truth serum in disguise if that makes sense.

    • @nmbana
      @nmbana 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      what if it's your boss 🤷🏾‍♂️

  • @belindahoeper5289
    @belindahoeper5289 9 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Thank you so much for this 🙏 I needed to hear this. Every single detail you mentioned is what I've been dealing with! He kept telling me that I'm the narcissist. He's spiralled out of control and trying to make me look bad and trying to destroy me, but he's destroying himself in the process as everyone around him can see how crazy he is with all his contradictions and constant lies. Thank you again 💓

    • @RebeccaZungEsq
      @RebeccaZungEsq  3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      If you are so sick of the drama, trauma, and chaos- and want real powerful strategies for success - I’ve got the answer for you - sign up for our free webinar and start your transformative journey- this is the day your life changes! Woohoo! www.icanslay.com 🌀✨

  • @LadyRobertaL
    @LadyRobertaL 2 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    OMG TOTALLY!!
    I was abused by a felon, female, African American- who makes people call her Reverend. This woman stole 12 years of my life and is a complete liar. You are right on! Thank you for your videos! I'm debating pursuing legal action for the physical, emotional, verbal and spiritual abuse she put me through. Thank you for the encouragement to go forward!!!

    • @ricoaranilla5949
      @ricoaranilla5949 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      is narcissist is bad person or just being angry to some people?

    • @PeterAngles-jq7gr
      @PeterAngles-jq7gr 9 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Al Sharpton?

  • @Always0110
    @Always0110 4 ปีที่แล้ว +151

    When hes caught in a lie, it quickly goes from him being in the hot seat, to me in the fire... i hate it.

    • @jessicarinehart6294
      @jessicarinehart6294 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      I'm in the same boat

    • @nana820able
      @nana820able 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      So am I and at 63, disabled I'm trying to find a way out.

    • @Always0110
      @Always0110 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@jessicarinehart6294 if you have any way out, run!!

    • @Always0110
      @Always0110 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@nana820able im 53..been with him since I was 15... its all ive ever known.

    • @nana820able
      @nana820able 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@Always0110 we were 17 and 18 so it's been 45 years. We got married 5 months after we met and I wasn't pregnant just stupid. I had wonderful parents and a big loving family. He grew up with the abused parents from abused parents and so on.

  • @salliegallegos918
    @salliegallegos918 3 ปีที่แล้ว +124

    Totally! 1. Gaslighting .2. They lie about trivial issues. 3. Intimidation tactics; they make threats. 4. Triangulation. They make you think that everyone is against you and for them. They are the most scaredy-cats on the planet. They need attention and are super afraid. What causes panic in narc? 1. Honesty stuns them. 2. Pushback. 3. Exposing them. 4. Losing control in anyway.

    • @blugrn1999
      @blugrn1999 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      You are exactly right! Had a supervisor love bomb me and then then discard me when she realized she could not control me and manipulate me. She attempted to triangulate coworkers including her supervisor.

    • @blugrn1999
      @blugrn1999 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Told her supervisor to make me talk to her when I gray rocked her after she threatened me!

    • @DoubleRainbows-fp6ih
      @DoubleRainbows-fp6ih 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@blugrn1999 - shocking aren't they! No apology I'm guessing!!

    • @kiraleasimms1433
      @kiraleasimms1433 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      BAM

  • @SMITHapk
    @SMITHapk 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I love how you delete all comments that disagree with you! It speaks wonders about you!!!

  • @melissanichols264
    @melissanichols264 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    TOTALLY!!
    Thank you for all you share to help those of us who deal with this type of person. It is exhausting!! Good to get tools with how to deal and to realize how much is going on!

    • @RebeccaZungEsq
      @RebeccaZungEsq  3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      If you are so sick of the drama, trauma, and chaos- and want real powerful strategies for success - I’ve got the answer for you - sign up for our free webinar and start your transformative journey- this is the day your life changes! Woohoo! www.icanslay.com 🌀✨

  • @maggienapier3181
    @maggienapier3181 4 ปีที่แล้ว +92

    His lies were so nuts I wondered if he had multiple personalities and didn't even remember the insanity we just went through

    • @anetavolcano5496
      @anetavolcano5496 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      They seem to forget very quickly, like nothing ever happened!

    • @officeemail7818
      @officeemail7818 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Girl I feel this...

    • @alinelozano783
      @alinelozano783 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I dated a covert narcissist for 6 years. Covert narcissist are the worse.
      They lie for everything, they make you believe a whole different new story, they manipulate you, they act like the victim around others, they give you the silent treatment, they leave you once they have another supply, they blame you for everything that happened in the relationship. They don't love anybody they just love themselves.
      They hate being exposed on social media because its like taking their real mask off.

    • @dalesmith4609
      @dalesmith4609 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Kick em "into the wild". See what i did there, ahh? eh??

    • @oscarwilliamson1264
      @oscarwilliamson1264 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Maggie McCandless,you are too precious 🌹🌹🥀🥀🥀 to be with a narc 🙄!

  • @paygxx5088
    @paygxx5088 3 ปีที่แล้ว +77

    I am so happy I finally got rid of him.
    I'm taking control of my life.
    No more living in hell

    • @tracynewton3083
      @tracynewton3083 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Happy happy big love n huggs xx

    • @littlepinkdaisy296
      @littlepinkdaisy296 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Well said.

    • @moyosoreoluwaayodeji9860
      @moyosoreoluwaayodeji9860 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Amen to that

    • @ebonyadams5539
      @ebonyadams5539 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Me too been there

    • @kendrarandal2776
      @kendrarandal2776 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      I’m so happy that my ex is gone!!! He took all the gifts from my daughter just because he wanted to take control of our happy Christmas!!! He chocked me while my daughter watched!! Almost killing me!!! All because I kept it real with him!!! Let’s just say he is no longer with me because I stopped giving him supply!!! Yes my ex from hell!!! Thank god he’s gone lord and I’m finally free from the narcissist after 3 years of hell!!!💯💯

  • @archu24695
    @archu24695 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    i literllary wanna cry sooo bad cuz everything you said about narcs in the beginning is sooo true. I am going through all this right now n it feels like death.

    • @paulblanford9135
      @paulblanford9135 ปีที่แล้ว

      I am going through this right now as well. It is absolute hell, if you want to talk I would love to have someone to talk to that's going through similar problems

  • @michaelbove5697
    @michaelbove5697 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank you for your professional advice. I have anxiety problems and you calm me down. I have problems dealing with a lot of narcissistic people that can get vicious and sometimes can do things that are bad for a persons health and no one does anything about it.

  • @ohcanada8084
    @ohcanada8084 4 ปีที่แล้ว +91

    Been dealing with people like these all my life. Absolutely exhausting and draining to be around them.

    • @teresafarrell6457
      @teresafarrell6457 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      My mother. 😕

    • @trumpeterswan4177
      @trumpeterswan4177 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      My ex referred to our bed as his "lair". Now I see that he was a con artist/narc/wolf in sheep's clothing.

    • @quickseevee3509
      @quickseevee3509 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      If that's the case you need to start self-analyzing to see why you haven't start to acknowledge to yourself when you see the signs and haven't learned to drop them right them and there the minute you see the signs. Stop being so optomistic. If someone seems like a bad person, trust your instinct. They are.

    • @ohcanada8084
      @ohcanada8084 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@quickseevee3509 Who says I haven’t? They are energy vampires who zone in to anyone who has an empathetic personality and are compassionate. They are the gum on the shoe of life.

    • @chriscogley7216
      @chriscogley7216 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Big time I hear you

  • @argileaustralia3854
    @argileaustralia3854 4 ปีที่แล้ว +289

    YES: They are sick people; imposters posing as 'nice' people except to the target.

    • @happyme3556
      @happyme3556 4 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Yes. That is the incidious evilness that I find. You feel like you are the only one that can see. Evil.

    • @lisab.horning3387
      @lisab.horning3387 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Totally!My elder brother & his wife are narcissists . Have been bullying & gaslighting mesince I was 12 years old. I’m now 61 years old now. Finally I realizec I can’t be wrong all thetime.

    • @AnonymousAnonymous-mb2wd
      @AnonymousAnonymous-mb2wd 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@happyme3556Aaaaa???..story of my life.

    • @lorik5675
      @lorik5675 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      You describe it perfectly,

    • @idk-sw1ns
      @idk-sw1ns 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Stfu

  • @sunshineday4221
    @sunshineday4221 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Totally, I have and still do keep his secrets and yes, it is due to the intimidation not just from him but his mother: "just don't call the police on him", great advice from my mother-in-law. I am learning to be strong again!!

    • @RebeccaZungEsq
      @RebeccaZungEsq  ปีที่แล้ว

      How are you doing now? Hope you're feeling well and getting your power back! 💪
      This might help - slay.rebeccazung.com/

  • @jt7510
    @jt7510 ปีที่แล้ว

    totally! I have just recently found your channel, thank you so much, I did your live stream but the time difference from London, I had to go to bed!! but I am learning so much from your videos, thank you so much xx

  • @skylarlafrance657
    @skylarlafrance657 3 ปีที่แล้ว +325

    What makes a Narc panic starts at 7:00
    1) Brutal honesty
    2) Pushing Back
    3) Exposing them
    4) Losing control from the Narc

    • @curtisgolston5110
      @curtisgolston5110 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Im not the tough guy i clame to be. Im not a player. I have no friends. I have no success. I repeatedly lie, cheat, and hurt the only ones who gave a fuck . I feed of attention but am afraid of it. I pray and try to change but honestly didn't know y I couldn't. My family had been dealing with me since the day 1 and subtly stsrted giving me help thst something aint right, damn nesr the whole community. I do want to change and come to reality, and have a real relationship with god and peoole but don't know. I feel line there's good in me but these actions of past trauma and being afraid to face the music on all of my behavior holds me back. How horrible my life is being isolated most life ect, u get a lot of time to search and see why u perceive yourself a way but dont get outcome. I read these comments after searching for the truth about myself, you know being gonest and ran across this NPD. I know people say theres no help and its best to stay away. But please god has talked to me in so many ways over the last years and i just know im not a lost cause. Please Help! Pray! If not for me DO IT FOR MY family i have a young brother, caring parents! I know im nothing now! A piece of shit the way i did people, but do it for my family, do it for the next person help! I am not looking for sympathy someone to drop what theyre doing and feel bad for me. I am not sociopath maybe, i am but i foh damn show know im narcissistic and want to actually change, salvation. Please respond no gimics no games but honesty!

    • @billion86
      @billion86 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@curtisgolston5110
      th-cam.com/video/ge0pChsEhx4/w-d-xo.html

    • @billion86
      @billion86 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@curtisgolston5110
      th-cam.com/video/b-rV6TLC0gU/w-d-xo.html
      &
      th-cam.com/video/u8ojYPHkPWo/w-d-xo.html

    • @Anya21084
      @Anya21084 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      And what to do if you make them panic and angry?

    • @sunflower5749
      @sunflower5749 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Thanks!!!!

  • @karinarenee5217
    @karinarenee5217 4 ปีที่แล้ว +215

    “Love bombing and then devalue” -yep! The never ending cycle. My only solution was to stop communication

    • @nonelikememe
      @nonelikememe 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      yea it was almost like not only were they trying to manipulate you but also punishing you for showing you some type of love.

    • @nonelikememe
      @nonelikememe 4 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      @@fomoorplaylist488 then you end up chasing their validation even if you don't want them. A terrible cycle.

    • @nunya6704
      @nunya6704 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Totally!!

    • @stacyburgess3371
      @stacyburgess3371 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      KARINA Renee I cannot seem to get that concept down even though it’s killing me

    • @stacyburgess3371
      @stacyburgess3371 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      me-me Adams yes and that made me start to cry reading what I already tell myself all the time. That’s the hardest part...they punish love that it what I call evil

  • @vince6792
    @vince6792 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank you so much Rebecca for the useful advice and insight into these deranged narcissistic individuals.

  • @chrisdavies7869
    @chrisdavies7869 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Spot on with everything you say. Very helpful and very insightful into the dark side of the narcs

  • @lyndabarritt2530
    @lyndabarritt2530 4 ปีที่แล้ว +45

    Totally! I was married to a true master manipulator. It took me many years to figure him out, and I finally stopped participating in the myriad head games. It crushed him, and our 27-year marriage ended. My life has been completely happy since then!

    • @ancamarr681
      @ancamarr681 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Lynda Barritt Congratulations! You were smart to not give him “fuel” or narcissistic supply...that’s why he wanted to end the marriage. You were no longer useful! Enjoy your freedoms and stay happy! ❤️

  • @crystalace22
    @crystalace22 4 ปีที่แล้ว +183

    the only way to deal with a narcissist is to cut all contact with them.and everyone else involved.
    Do not get sucked into playing their game it will just become an endless cycle.

    • @armeniansdoitbetter
      @armeniansdoitbetter 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Amen. Just walk away. The frustration is real. I highly question the state of those who may want to exact revenge on someone, even a narcissist. Just move on and heal yourself.

    • @lisap3344
      @lisap3344 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      It’s not easy when it’s a family member, they are the worst !!!!

    • @FITH5795
      @FITH5795 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      My daughter it's sad. I learned the darn hard way. I stay pray UP.

    • @nunyabizzz1135
      @nunyabizzz1135 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Very true. Its an endless cycle of toxicity

    • @barbibutton9619
      @barbibutton9619 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Yes, I've wasted 15 years..never knew what I was dealing with until this past year.

  • @Texican23
    @Texican23 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    TOTALLY. and it is so good to know that others know what is going on and I am not alone.

  • @honeyjinx02
    @honeyjinx02 ปีที่แล้ว

    OMG, the pushing back! I politely pushed back against a former boss and they were so shocked but also they became suddenly very submissive/scared of the pushback!

  • @jitindralall3929
    @jitindralall3929 3 ปีที่แล้ว +95

    Absolutely...simply cut off all communications with them

    • @2nanalinda
      @2nanalinda 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      It’s hard when it’s your 44 yr old daughter . But 25 yrs of misery

    • @jitindralall3929
      @jitindralall3929 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @Kevin Kennett yes she was

    • @timthydutton1611
      @timthydutton1611 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Definitely, they are relentless. Keep away.

  • @kbrad4280
    @kbrad4280 4 ปีที่แล้ว +197

    A Narc is like dealing with an Alzheimer’s patient

    • @scientist3149
      @scientist3149 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Kimberley Bradshaw true but they have good cognition! Generally....

    • @kbrad4280
      @kbrad4280 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Frances Frisch Their gaslighting... how it happened, and there version... 🤣🤣

    • @sophieann8880
      @sophieann8880 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      yes - very interesting perspective......he forgets everything....including me!

    • @FC-by2ve
      @FC-by2ve 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      lol, this is a very interesting take I never thought about before

    • @alicegolightly9699
      @alicegolightly9699 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Really? So that explains why my ex claims to have completely forgotten that I got pregnant, and that he was so happy he carried the test result in his back pocket for weeks? And then when I miscarried after 4 months he denied I was ever pregnant?? I am learning so much here!

  • @gemmarigley4778
    @gemmarigley4778 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Them being constant ill is so true I'm sick of giving my ex the pity party I'm sick of it and now going gray rock

  • @angeleyes1000
    @angeleyes1000 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

    So true. I dealt with a major narcissist in the past. He was all of these things.

  • @brendakdavis8634
    @brendakdavis8634 4 ปีที่แล้ว +118

    I've dealt w/many narcissists in my life. I'm an empath so they flock to me as if i'm a magnet. I will eventually feel very uneasy & i will leave. I've been learning since how to recognize a narcassist....thank gawd!

    • @RosieWilliamOlivia
      @RosieWilliamOlivia 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      You also attract them, not intentionally that's just how it is.

    • @RosieWilliamOlivia
      @RosieWilliamOlivia 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      @Vitelotte no. You can't heal them but they will let you try and suck you dry as a result.

    • @Nokss87
      @Nokss87 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Me too 😭 😭

    • @Nokss87
      @Nokss87 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @Vitelotte no you'll die inside, don't ever do that. Learn to put up boundaries.

    • @henrikljungstrand2036
      @henrikljungstrand2036 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @Vitelotte Perhaps you can help them heal themselves, but only through being stern to them, bluntly telling them the truth about themselves, exposing them to others deliberately, showing them that you don't care the least about their gaslighting, lies and tantrums, that you don't need them in any way, but that you *still* care about them as people. Teach them what is worthy of respect and what is only worthy of contempt. Flip their sick worldview and mentality by force. If it doesn't work, then just give up on them, and don't feel bad about it. They are responsible for their own miserable state, while you are not, this is true even though they shy away from their responsibility.

  • @Polecat-qz5om
    @Polecat-qz5om 4 ปีที่แล้ว +37

    I don’t want anyone to panic I just want them to forgot about me and move on... over it

  • @tdio1789
    @tdio1789 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Totally 100% my Supervisor. Thank you for the tips.