I believe that the reason narcissists never apologize for anything, is because they are enjoying the hurt they gave us, and to apologize would make us not feel as hurt so badly...AND THEY WANT US TO HURT! An apology ruins the whole harm they secretly intended, or even if they didn't actually intend for something negative to happen, and it did, then that's their private little enjoyment they're getting, seeing something negative has occurred to us. They are over there, just laughing up their sleeve, and any apology would ruin that secret satisfaction.
You are exactly right. They enjoy hurting others on purpose, matter of fact, they go out of their way to hurt us for their own enjoyment. How would I know this? Last summer I was at a narcissistic/toxic/abusive friend's house for a little get together. It was just the two of us and our husbands there. I don't drink alcohol but the said friend does and after about 7 shots, she tells me in the most giddy, fun fun, hilarious manner that she had told her husband earlier in the day that if I did not accept her invitation to come over that evening, that she was going to punish me by giving me the silent treatment for a week. She laughed herself silly during and after telling me this. Needless to say, I've been no contact with her after that.
@@c.j.7226 Good for you! She doesn't seem like any "friend" to begin with...so you really weren't ending any actual friendship anyway. After we get to know someone and discover how toxic they truly are, it's only healthy to drop these drips. Life it too short, and it's better to make room for those who do meet the description of "friend" than waste time being miserable for no reason other than not knowing how to escape from these poisonous individuals.
I suspect they don't apologize because their abuser never apologized for hurting them. Another interesting theory....They hate the word NO because their abuser didn't listen when they said NO, so why would they listen to NO when they abuse??
Yessss for years my Ex. Narc was Mr. Charming at public places. Church, work events etc. I used to think, that’s the wonderful man I married. But on the way home from a party, event etc he started his pouty brat, hissy fit - he’d pick a fight in the car on the way home 🏡
@@hawaiigirl8089 because he became exhausted trying to keep up appearances because you dont have to work hard at people liking you for you. So its your fault. Its shame.
They were not all traumatized as a child. Some just deeply and thoroughly love evil and to murder the souls (mind, will, emotions) of specific chosen others, as they project a wonderful facade to most. They LOVE to hurt others.
You must remember that they are led by a evil spirit the devil comes to steal kill and to destroy you need to take care of your self they don't know anything about love don't fool yourself they are very charming to get you to give them what they want said no and you will see what happens sign Cynthia Smith
@brianwick8040 You are a 💯 right! Narcissism is a cancer on our society…the week I was forced to get a restraining order on my narcissistic to-be ex, I was diagnosed with cancer…the abuse is real. So happy you were able to help someone armed with the tools learned here. Gives me great hope for the future! Stay awesome! 🙌✨ Huge thank you for the incredible content @rebeccazungesq 🥰🙏💖
Well I'm not with this guy anymore. I am SO GLAD that he caused me to walk away from him. It was a blessing. Now I'm able to move on with more healthy relationships. Praise God 😇😀❣️
They had a traumatic childhood in which they were physically, emotionally or even sexually abused. They didn't grow up with proper structure, they have no lifeskill lesosns, they have this public image where folks worship the ground that they walk on. A True Tom Ripley Syndrome. They can't have proper friendships with folks because they can't stand anyone upstaging them, they use folks for their own selfish gain. They live in a Bubble Of Perfection and when the Bubble bursts, that's when the problems really begin. Secrets are the heart and soul of their lives. They always turn the situation around to make you look like the bad buy but in reality it's them. Self hate is so true. Deep down, they are very lonely, sad and uphappy but they don't acknowledge it.
An honest person doesn’t need to tell you they’re honest. A smart person doesn’t need to tell you they’re smart. A rich person doesn’t need to tell you they’re rich. During discard - a lion doesn’t need to tell you it’s a lion.
Yup 32 years. Had to call it quits. I’ve developed do many issues myself and have become dysfunctional. Reactive abuse. I didn’t like myself and sought therapy to help me. I’ve let him waste and destroy my life.
My mom got free and started her healing a few years ago, I got free at 29 and she got free 2 years after at 54. Nothing is wasted, it'll all turn for good, stay strong 💪🏼❤️🔥
Boy you are not kidding!!!! 2 selves. Thats it in a nutshell. I just ended a relationship with a nutcase narcissist. OMG, what hell. Nothing but LIES. I work out 2 hours daily to get Past this crap. Freedom now!
I don’t think she meant that literally. If someone accuses you of being gay doesn’t mean they’re gay! It just means they’re an idiot who trying really hard to anger you! On the other hand, some people, whether narcissistic or not, will often accuse you of cheating on them. Then you find out they’ve been the one cheating! So please don’t misunderstand the meaning and start spreading rumors that the other person is gay because that’s what you think Rebecca was saying. That’s a slippery slope that could land you in a ton of trouble! 🤷♀️
@@reneepierce569 he also constantly accused me of cheating, threatened to have me followed!!! And accusing of stealing money. All things he did. Hopefully not the following part. But I did tell him to do a background check on that person and install cameras in the house because nothing was going on.
Narcissists are just mentally damaged people who will never be normal…….you must leave a narcissist as soon as you’re able to, you must not be afraid of them, you should document/record everything in case you end up in court, you must expose them for what they really are and you must have no mercy on them whatsoever because they will destroy you in a heartbeat without thinking twice. ✊
This woman.. is amazing I have never heard a more accurate and easy to understood explanation.. I never could understand I could never get anywhere with these type of people no matter how much I tryed to listen or be there ..
FAKERS! Amazingly Fake. Thank you again Rebecca. You truly shine a bright light of understanding on what is really happening when dealing with these people.
12:13 changing their behavior 13:04 they don’t care about anyone but themselves 14:07 they don’t want you to know their true intentions 14:37 they don’t want you to know their true capabilities 15:25 they’re doing the bare minimum 16:02 they want you to keep buying their sales pitch 16:59 you are simply a source of supply 17:20 their life is a constant struggle 17:52 fearing people will figure out they are a fraud
Your best bet H.W. is not to "deal" with the alcoholic narcissistic, but to leave and don't look back. TRUST ME (speaking from experience). Yes, leaving will hurt at first BUT trust you will be much happier and stronger without them!
All of those features are classic symptoms of narcissism. After 15+ years and a divorce I finally see my ex in a different light. For all the hype and bravado, he’s really just a scared little boy. It’s very sad because it’s as though narcissists are forfeiting their true selves for some hologram. It’s also sad because there’s usually little, if anything, that can bring about any change or awareness in their lives so that their fate is sealed. Very sad indeed.
Everything you have in your videos are SPOT on. I was married to one for 32 long years. I tried so hard to make a marriage successful. But impossible to live with all the lies projecting and reflecting. Thank you so much Rebecca. I would love to make an appointment with you. Sad thing is my son has turned into his same manners of his father. I am heart broken to have divorced both husband and son.
So sorry for You❣️Father and oldest brother the same.. to the only daughter sister in the middle..empath lovely Mother passed away...then they hurted me a lot..much more than before! No more protection of my mother...older brother and his wife no siblings parents passed away she is also a narcissist!! Then they manipulated father and he went on their side..anyway he is the first narcissist... don't want to see them anymore ..Mother and me the beautiful ones..they can stay in their own mud!!
Mine said everyone has secrets. After I caught him cheating. I didn't have secrets. I'm a Scorpio, you better believe after that I definitely had some secrets. I figured that I better get me some. Then I left. I'm in a good relationship now. No need for secrets. So again, don't have secrets. But I can in a heartbeat, if that's the dynamic he brings into it at some point! And you better believe if that happens, I will leave!!!
I met an old narcissist I'd blocked a few months ago last week and he's just like all 20 of these.....so much worse than my ex. Demonstrated a lot of these in the few hours I was with them. Its amazing how someone can have all 20.
Well I’m so glad to learn of narcissism and empaths. I am an empath. I feel other peoples pain to the point that I feel it physically. I also can see into a situation and people and I’m always surprised when other people can’t. I now know that I have attracted narcissists all my life. I don’t like being an empath because it hurts me. My stomach is a wreck. I’ve been called sappy, but I can’t help it. Now I know the situation with narcissists I feel armed and ready to stand tall. Since I attract narcissists my life at 77 years is full of them, but I’ve learned how to handle them. My daughter hasn’t spoken to me since Mother’s Day. I love her dearly, but now that I know what is driving her I can relax. My first husband, my daughter, my grandson, my sister in law and a friend are all narcissist. My best plan is to stay away from them and let my own valuable emotions and my stomach heal. God bless you in your work.
It doesn't really matter how close (family or not) a person is, or if they're even really a narcissist, if they're toxic they have to be cut out of your life for your own well-being, that being said, it seems unlikely that all the people you listed would be actual narcissists, probably just toxic people with some narcissistic traits. I think the word you're thinking of is "sympathy"... its when you experience the emotions of others, "empathy" is the ability to understand and relate to a person's experience without the emotional experience, so you could say you're a "sympath", but I'd just call it being a normal healthy human.
My God!! Me too!! Is it possible we attract them so we can change ourselves or even, be the mirror for them to see themselves in order to change themselves??
@@edscot9986 Its not that deep lol. Narcissists lack insight and self awareness because they don't have a "self", so they can't see themselves or change. They're attracted to people who are codependents... aka an easy mark, both are opposite sides of the same coin... the narcissist is also a codependent personality... a toxic one.
Hi! Fellow empath here. You can learn to block. I picture a glass silo around me, ground myself, take a minute and I'm ready. You can Google all about it. How to hone it, embrace it and also your intuition. It's a blessing and a curse but with blocking and grounding it's more blessing. Take care ❤
I'm also an empath, but I saw so many red flags and got fed up with his lying and treating me like I was stupid. So, I walked away and he was totally shocked that I could throw up a boundary he can't get past.
I think when they lie about unnecessary things, they are still doing it for a reason though it seems unnecessary. Anything that keeps others away from reality in someway will make them more receptive to their deception in any way. They want others to accept their imaginary world.
I get tired of hearing "as a child they were traumatized", blaming parents. I came out of 20 years of therapy in which my doctors deemed "catastrophic child abuse". Why did I not grow up to be a narcissistic person? From my experience I believe people make their own choices because they want to. There is no invisible parent twisting their arm.
I agree. They choose to hide inside themselves but in doing so they are giving themselves over to demonic spirits that direct their actions and words. Their brains are different and if you stay with one long enough your brain will change like theirs too. That's why your health takes a toll from being with them. It's all about the limbic system in the brain - which is the seat of aggression and fear. Empaths beware. Being with them shrinks the part of the brain associated with empathy. They are not fully human.
There is a certain amount of truth to what you say. I think the childhood trauma that happens, causes the defensive behavior/survival skills to be developed. At some point, they either start to take responsibility for themselves and start to grow up, or, alternatively, they end up believing the lies they told themselves and continue in the downward spiral of self deception which becomes the full blown narc. One thing I have found is to explain things like this to myself in the most simple terms, but be careful to not oversimplify them. There can be complex twists that are important to become aware of. It's a process that they bought into at an early age and isn't always easy to break out of. I can care for them, but I cannot take care of them or heal them. That is something they have to see for themselves, reach out for help for themselves, and take steps to change for themselves.
I agree. I adore my stbx’s mom. But he treats her like he treats me. I heard both sides of behaviors that caused rifts. The mom has regret and apologies. She was also young when she had him and married a useless alcoholic who was never around. Yet he idolizes his father. I think its a longing and fantasy but its no reason to lie and use people.
Going through this right now, my heart hurts, my head hurts, she doesn't care about the kids, nothing, just being a lying cheater, has alienated everyone from me, talked shit with my friends, slept with my alleged best friend of 25 yrs, love life 😔 not. I'm made out to be the crazy one. I am not, I've been evaluated, it isn't me.
it's really sad dealing with such type of people in a romantic love relationship. I am a victim and i dont feel ashamed to voice it out, after the trauma, abuse and shame showed towards and against me. The love booming, attention, genuine love, spending together all ceased in one day and never was restored. Until after going through rejected, doubted myself, my worth, and sanity for few weeks, i decided to tell me myself i am not the problem, and that i did everything as a genuine and healthy person should do in a relationship and it wasn't appreciated but took for granted. Today, am listening and watching this vid and i feel blessed.
These narcissist have become so good at lying to THEMSELVES that the struggle with their reality and when the do open up about this past its a control mechanism so that they can 1. Gain sympathy 2. Play the martyr 3. Try to control 4. Project wrong actions on you!
This is my mom all day everyday. In the eyes of the public & the few friends she has left, it is top priority for her to make them think that she's "loved by everyone," everyone needs & depends on her friendship, she's delicate & would give the shirt off her back.... which she will, depending on WHO she's trying to impress. But receiving that shirt if hers secretly comes with a hefty price tag..... these same people she's trying to impress have NO IDEA
Imperfect list: 1. They have two Selves: True Self = scared little one that they hate, think is weak they want to cover up = their masquerade. False Self = 2. Lying. They do get away with it. They can’t tell the truth even tho it would make their lives easier 3. Don’t want you to know the secrets they are hiding. Lot going on they don’t want you to see. Constantly accusing you of lying… 4. They don’t want you to know all the things they have done wrong that they can’t take responsibility for. 5. They don’t want you to know that the reason why they treat you horribly is bc this is a reflection to how they feel about themselves (?) > they see something you have as valuable they want / need 6. They don’t want you to know that they are looking for ways to get attention. 7. They won’t tell you that the reason they have a hard time apologising to you: either it is your fault to begin with or… the only way they can apologise is a way of manipulating 8. They don’t want ou to know why they are punishing them. They want to hang it all on you the responsibility for the pain caused… 9. Don’t want you to know they have the problem. They are deeply unhappy inside and they don’t really know they have inside themselves 10. Everything a Narcissist does is to manipulate you: everything is a manipulation 11. They don’t want you to know they are chameleons: whatever makes them 12. They hide the fact they are looking out for Number 1 at all times. All expressions of affection or care is FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKERS IT IS ALL A MANIPULATION 13. They don’t want you to know their true intentions to use you 14. ….. Numbered points mixed up from here on 15. Don’t want you to know what they are truly capable of: how devious and nasty they are capable of > they save this for their true targets 16. 17. They don’t want you to know they are doing the bare minimum in the relationship. They want to take 18. As long as they are getting some supply out of you they are going to keep going on. They hope you are going to keep buying their… 19. You are simply a source of supply to them. As long as you have use to them they want to keep you around 20. It is literally exhausting for them … feeling empty.. 21. They hide the fact they are living fearing they are a massive fraud and they fear they will be found out = where your leverage really is
I found this channel about two weeks ago after i left my lying, cheating, stealing girlfriend. I did not know she was a narcissist when i left, but this channel has taught me so much. I have literally sent her some of your videos to help explain myself and my feelings to her because she still has control over me. Im just glad i escaped and got out of there before i gave her a chance to dig her claws back in.
FAKERS !!!! Thank you Rebecca for you being here with all your videos & everyone comments here. I hoped you & everyone here to have a beautiful wonderful blessed 🙏 day.
Secrets…yes. I had to tell a couple of neighbours what was going on as he was starting to scare me and he was raging mad about it. He was having a rant saying no one should have known about HIM…….not that no one should have known about US, that one word said it all. He was ok with telling his harem and his son about what was happening as all his calls were put on speakerphone while he was bad mouthing me (it was over by then but I was still in our house until he had got the money to buy me out, which was 3 months), he just didn’t want people close by to know, of course they would have heard me telling him to get out of my bedroom which he barged into day and night without knocking so he could mouth off or intimidate and harass me. By the time I left 9 weeks ago he had already started the smear campaign saying it was me who was the problem, just like he told me his 3 ex wives and long string of ex girls friends were the problem.
My wife cheated on me and blamed it on me. It’s my fault she said. 20 years of marriage she never apologize for her wrong doing or mistakes. She hides and used me for everything. She lies so much and hide her phone. Exactly what you’re saying .
Spot on! I’ve dealt with two, after they broke me, almost. After all the pain they caused and chaos, it took me a while to realize they, like bullies are more afraid than their victims. There is no way to win. She cut me off, and it’s the best thing. Except her dad is my brother who I adore. And of course he will take her side. 😢
I wanted to have a conversation about how I was being treated and requiring proper communication, turned into a word salad backed with a tantrum on how I don't care. First time I saw some rage included and I realize it could get bad.
I write down notes and put it everywhere to keep me safe and sane. And for the FAKERS!! as a extra pointer i have added *my gut feeling cant lie, I feel it and dont allow my past gaslight my present truth* thank you Rebecca, you saved me and many others 💐
I ignored my intuition for years. Til i was almost destriyed. My self image, my seld esteem, my ability to give or receive love again. My wallet. I mean i hate him.
Future faking. That was something I experienced but did not know it was a “thing”…..I remember hearing all of these things she said she was going to help me with, and to me, I was just wondering how she was ever going to have the time. It sounded crazy, and at the same time she would tell me about things she wanted help with. So bizarre.
@@RebeccaZungEsq I am doing pretty well now. After six months of working though and processing what happened, I am able to put the entire experience behind me and move on. It does take time and I do think I am a different person. Thank you for your help and kindness. It really means a lot.⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Happy Lunar New Year Ms. Zung if you celebrate this occasion. After 2 years of learning about everything narcissism on your channel, I feel like 2023 is going to be a lot at ease and less confined by grudge and resentment for me personally. I still have a lot to learn till I reach the state of not reacting when hearing the names of my toxic abusers, and even more to cover if I want to keep my cool in the case of meeting them again. It surely is a very very slow healing process of tons of baby steps. But I definitely feel that a positive result is coming near.
Yes he said he was attracted to me because I was so strong and he knew I could put up with his crap. Quote unquote. He’s milked that strength and I have nothing left.
Number 14….their true capabilities. During one of his rages when he threatened me, he said that he would be horrible as he’s very good at it and will make me F’ing Suffer. I had started voice recording him 6 weeks or so earlier as he was starting to get nasty and this particular day was when I told him it was over for good, I said that no man had ever threatened me in my life and I wasn’t putting up with him doing it. I saw the red mist come over him and knew for my safety I had to end it and get out. It took him 3 months to raise a mortgage and get the rest of the money to buy me out of a house we had only bought 3 months earlier. He used me to help him up the property ladder to a lovely house with the full intent that he was going to have it for himself without me in it. The last 12 weeks were hell but I’m out now and glad to be rid of him at last.
All right, Rebecca, four minutes into this I’m making a comment. My ex would like about anything. She never developed conversation skills skills, back to childhood. They lie and they do all these things they do and they’re so good at it because he been doing it since they were five years old. It’s the thing is he practiced in practice, and practiced more than anything in their life, getting their way at all cost and avoiding true interpersonal relationships and everything it takes to make one flourish and be successful, or even divorce with integrity and honesty. It just ain’t gonna happen with these. People
My ex, a brother, a sister, and a son are Narcissists. I didn't realize my ex was a narc until two years after she left. However, about two years before she left, I quit trying to make her happy -- our married headed sharply downhill from there. So very glad she's gone.
I am currently going through family court and I have been accused of everything under the sun, which of course is all lies. The way you describe a narc in your videos is exactly what the mother of my child is like. It really is sad as my daughter is missing out on having me in her life. But I am hopeful that one day the narc will be exposed and I will get to see my daughter again. Thanks again for your videos :)
Thank you Rebecca for helping me to educate myself about Narcissist personality Disorder. Unfortunately my family meet a man who was a narcissist who abuses his position and authority. I listened very carefully to you in regards to going to court, how to document proof and what to expect when you do go to court with a narcissist. Very soon my family will be in a civil court case with a narcissist who has ran for the hills hence his employer will be in court. I documented all contact and have written proof which according to our lawyer is amazing evidence for the case . We will more than likely win this civil case because of these written words. I honestly feel very prepared and ready to deal with this mess. I greatly appreciate your words of wisdom and expertise.
Thank you for this information you share. Really it is helpful. I have a small business and got my first charge back. This guy is a pice of work. I’m being charged for trust passing and theft. I was there by his request to bring him another set of signs. He didn’t know that I knew what he did. When I got there not only was he using the signs he said was sub standard but he cut the set of magnets but they were in his trailer. I got out of the vehicle and walked up to the trailer and took the magnets and said you can’t have it both ways. You can’t use the signs cut them up and use them as well as do a charge back. I paid the charge back I was on the property by request and I got charged with the crime. So far it has cost me a thousand dollars to obtain an attorney,court is coming up and I will not go down as a the charges read. Nope! Not having it. Faker, fakers fakers
I’m so worried for my own fake ways. Now that I understand the narcissistic tendencies I find I am the one who is faking empathy and giving false praise. Yuck. I am disgusted!
For now we see through a glass darkly. But in the end, all things become clear. 7 years and many red flags I saw and kept trying because I loved her. Finally had enough and broke up with her. Through all the pain, confusion, anger, grief, loss and missing her, my immediate overwhelming feeling after the break up was relief. Rebecca and others have showed me what I refused to put together from pieces. She was a narcissist, covert I think. When a relationship ends and you feel relief, you know leaving was the right move. NEVER AGAIN! Eyes wide open……
Best way I have heard it described. Public self - Work, etc Private self - Home, family Secret self - lying, cheating, stealing, etc... I caught mine doing all 3. Would never admit to any of it after being caught.
Thank you for all you do! Damn! What I just experienced for the past 6 1/2 years. No connection to her. Except that she is the manager of the building I live in and is right below me. The kicker is that she conned the owner of a small 15 unit apt. building to the extent that he has become one of her 'flying monkeys"'! And now for my own sanity I have to move, and being on a fixed income , having the best unit, the best view, no winter heat bill, with cable and internet included has got me into my first ever panic attack last week.
You say they want to hide their true self, but my experience tells me different. They do open up with their inner thoughts. I won't go into detail cause it's wrong, but they do at times share with you. That's what made it all the more difficult for me to accept. The blame game is hard to live with. The projection is painful. Hating themselves - again my experience is a liittle difffrrent. My ex did on occasion say that to me. After a couple months of going through all the emotions, and now trying to get on with my life, i find it all sad. Sad for the unnecessary pain thats been caused. Sad at the mess of the after affects. Sad that someone has the ability to treat someone else like that. Sad that there's another person lying in wait. And most importantly for me, I'm sad that there's not more out there to help them. Yes, i hear loud and clear that they may not deserve it, but, i dont wish them harm or ill health. I wish them to see, recognise, and seek the correct help. 2024, there's so much more available. I know it's down to the individual to want it. We get told not to let them know that we know, but that don't wash with me. I'll let you know every time, consequences or not. It's my duty to call you out. What you do with that is down to you. I've done my bit, now do yours. Right or wrong, just my opinion.
I was a victim of this I had to figure out this all alone that my own family were narcissistic both parents have this dark energy I was a child struggling to figure out what's really going on here I've been treated horribly and I had to stand up for my children and granddaughter and daughter n law I'm drew the line it's over no more mind games hate and abuse playing victim and hurting and manipulating I not allowing them to touch us 💯
that absolutely breaks my heart as a mother to think my child hates himself so much that he has to torture me. It doesn’t make me feel good. Makes me feel like I wanna just fix him. I want him to be happy and love himself. What do I do I’m in such asituation that my life is just stopped halted. Cannot go forward. I just lay here and suffer.
It's my daughter in law, I'm her food, she feeds on me , my husband and my son( her hubby) I was very nice to her coz I didn't know she was a narc. After having her 1st baby boy she changed and made my son against me. Ppl tell me let her go but my husband wants his son to be withhim😢
I was raised by one and my sibling is one as well. Obviously, I now have mental health issues, but I know everything about them. I could literally write a book. The best thing to do is no contact.
Agree with every one of these points. Two and half years, have not reacted, engaged, defended any accusations and they are still attacking. The most hideous outcome is that the kids are under their spell. I equate not engaging, being culpable and living a good life as an open door for them to reflect, my kids. They are and always be my primary concern, don't want a relationship. May sound sad though I am happy and blessed. As a builder I bought a site, built a home and loved evert inhabitant. When I got I'll the narc went to work. Thank you, you're insight is spot on, no regrets ❤️
Wow,.... All the above hit big 😮. I just detached myself from him, however he lives with my brother in law and sister, so i still may bump into him. I truly believe he has moved on and is not bothered by the separation at all. But, all these apply😮
May I add, I don't want a relationship with anyone else. My kids are and always will be paramount in my thoughts, forgive my grammar and thanks for this channel. 🙏
Oh my ! I am reading/hearing you say the thoughts I have about “a narcissist “ that I figured must have gone through a textbook description of how they got to here. I’ve watched this two faced pattern and they can be very convincing when they have an agenda. Once they have their “victim” baited, they use them, lie and cheat to get to their end goal. I have some good reading to do. Thank you!
Thanks, Rebecca. The narc who targeted me was particularly diabolical. As my primary care physician who had put me on antidepressants, she had inside information into almost everything. And having me on a psychotropic medication, she could easily say I was the crazy one. Then manipulated me into undergoing a physical exam where she fondled my privates. What the living hell?
You have been a great help for me and my understanding narcissistic people on how to spot and deal with them. Your a veil lifter ! And much appreciated.
Those that have finally left the narcissist good for you. All the videos I would see but I kept thinking and saying to myself “no my spouse is different this can’t be”. Well that mind set got me in a situation that is very very difficult. She accused me of being a narcissist and I believed her and I would go get help but all the counseling that I would do they suggested codependency. I’m now dealing with the repercussions of her lies and manipulation and of course of my actions I fell for her trap because I ignored everything. Those of you dealing with a narcissist please take all this information and walk away for your health and safety. Again I kept thinking that my spouse was the exception and now I have a lot to deal with 😔.. I’m an empath and a codependent so I was easy target
I've been married to a narcissist for 4 years and did not see it coming until he burned our house and vehicle to the ground and abandoned me 2 hours from my home and it's the best thing that actually could have happened to me because of that my children saw I was not the problem in the issue and did not have insane thoughts I truly see now what kind of a man he is and my children will have nothing to do with him ever again
i hate the thought of my son thinking and doing these things that people are calling evil and a monster and there’s nothing that anyone can do to make them normal nothing at all . he is 100% covert narcissist!
Do these narcs attempt suicide? My mother in law show all these behaviours. Currently she is living with my husband and myself. It's been a year that she is under my roof, she verbally abuses me, then tells my husband (her son) I verbally attacked her, or that I have hit her. She has attempted suicide s few times since I have know her. What really makes me furious is that my husband does not see through all her lies , it's come to a point where I am ready to leave the house and go and stay with my son. She sleeps with a large kitchen knife under her pillow and has told me that she's not done with me. My husband does not take her serious
They live double lives
They live more than just doubled life’s but sometimes five or six different life’s.
I believe that the reason narcissists never apologize for anything, is because they are enjoying the hurt they gave us, and to apologize would make us not feel as hurt so badly...AND THEY WANT US TO HURT! An apology ruins the whole harm they secretly intended, or even if they didn't actually intend for something negative to happen, and it did, then that's their private little enjoyment they're getting, seeing something negative has occurred to us. They are over there, just laughing up their sleeve, and any apology would ruin that secret satisfaction.
You are exactly right. They enjoy hurting others on purpose, matter of fact, they go out of their way to hurt us for their own enjoyment.
How would I know this?
Last summer I was at a narcissistic/toxic/abusive friend's house for a little get together. It was just the two of us and our husbands there. I don't drink alcohol but the said friend does and after about 7 shots, she tells me in the most giddy, fun fun, hilarious manner that she had told her husband earlier in the day that if I did not accept her invitation to come over that evening, that she was going to punish me by giving me the silent treatment for a week. She laughed herself silly during and after telling me this.
Needless to say, I've been no contact with her after that.
@@c.j.7226 Good for you! She doesn't seem like any "friend" to begin with...so you really weren't ending any actual friendship anyway. After we get to know someone and discover how toxic they truly are, it's only healthy to drop these drips. Life it too short, and it's better to make room for those who do meet the description of "friend" than waste time being miserable for no reason other than not knowing how to escape from these poisonous individuals.
I suspect they don't apologize because their abuser never apologized for hurting them.
Another interesting theory....They hate the word NO because their abuser didn't listen when they said NO, so why would they listen to NO when they abuse??
He apologized all the time but it was manipulation
Demons, demons, demons are what i call them!!!
@@janetwestbrook3245
They are definitely Satan’s Spawn ~ soulless monsters
Yessss for years my Ex. Narc was Mr. Charming at public places. Church, work events etc. I used to think, that’s the wonderful man I married. But on the way home from a party, event etc he started his pouty brat, hissy fit - he’d pick a fight in the car on the way home 🏡
Im so sorry, I hear you dear❤
@@hawaiigirl8089 because he became exhausted trying to keep up appearances because you dont have to work hard at people liking you for you. So its your fault. Its shame.
They were not all traumatized as a child. Some just deeply and thoroughly love evil and to murder the souls (mind, will, emotions) of
specific chosen others, as they project a wonderful facade to most. They LOVE to hurt others.
You must remember that they are led by a evil spirit the devil comes to steal kill and to destroy you need to take care of your self they don't know anything about love don't fool yourself they are very charming to get you to give them what they want said no and you will see what happens sign Cynthia Smith
Success story: Your vids helped me assist someone in a relationship with a narc. Beyond helpful. Narcissism is a cancer on our society.
So glad you found them helpful! Don't forget to hit like share and subscribe. Keep SLAYing!
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Rebecca thank you for these life giving videos. You have taught so many of us how to protect ourselves from additional abuse.
@brianwick8040 You are a 💯 right! Narcissism is a cancer on our society…the week I was forced to get a restraining order on my narcissistic to-be ex, I was diagnosed with cancer…the abuse is real.
So happy you were able to help someone armed with the tools learned here. Gives me great hope for the future! Stay awesome! 🙌✨
Huge thank you for the incredible content @rebeccazungesq 🥰🙏💖
I'm ALSO helping a WONDERFUL friend get away, also!!😊❤
I have no compassion or empathy for this individual. I will feel no remorse for this person till they struggle with their last breath.
Me neither I'm outta here I can't even take the tone of her voice.
@@thingsifixed sorry my response was in Referance to step father who finally got the message on my end...
AMEN I'm done
They have as much meaning as a chair, a leaf, etc. i have no more feelings, care, etc.
They will ruin your life completely!
So true !! They can't run their own lives but want control over yours. It's ridiculous!!
It's realizing that you are precious and beautiful and don't allow this toxicity to get in your realm
I'm walking away from my covert narcissist wife today after 4 years with your help. Thank you!!!!
Wooo hoooo🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉
Well I'm not with this guy anymore.
I am SO GLAD that he caused me to walk away from him. It was a blessing. Now I'm able to move on with more healthy relationships. Praise God 😇😀❣️
It’s all about them hiding from themselves. That’s it. Everything grows from that.
Running from their trauma and pain wedged into their space since childhood. That's all .
They had a traumatic childhood in which they were physically, emotionally or even sexually abused. They didn't grow up with proper structure, they have no lifeskill lesosns, they have this public image where folks worship the ground that they walk on. A True Tom Ripley Syndrome. They can't have proper friendships with folks because they can't stand anyone upstaging them, they use folks for their own selfish gain. They live in a Bubble Of Perfection and when the Bubble bursts, that's when the problems really begin. Secrets are the heart and soul of their lives. They always turn the situation around to make you look like the bad buy but in reality it's them. Self hate is so true. Deep down, they are very lonely, sad and uphappy but they don't acknowledge it.
Yes they are MAJOR FAKERS!!!! Thank you Rebecca!!!! Always great tips and words of knowledge!!! Knowledge is power over these disgusting creatures!!!
So glad you found them helpful! Don't forget to hit like share and subscribe. Keep SLAYing!
An honest person doesn’t need to tell you they’re honest. A smart person doesn’t need to tell you they’re smart. A rich person doesn’t need to tell you they’re rich. During discard - a lion doesn’t need to tell you it’s a lion.
Your vids have helped me stay no contact with the narcissist.
Yup 32 years. Had to call it quits. I’ve developed do many issues myself and have become dysfunctional. Reactive abuse. I didn’t like myself and sought therapy to help me. I’ve let him waste and destroy my life.
22 years and im desperate to heal
My mom got free and started her healing a few years ago, I got free at 29 and she got free 2 years after at 54. Nothing is wasted, it'll all turn for good, stay strong 💪🏼❤️🔥
Boy you are not kidding!!!! 2 selves. Thats it in a nutshell.
I just ended a relationship with a nutcase narcissist. OMG, what hell. Nothing but LIES. I work out 2 hours daily to get Past this crap. Freedom now!
Rebecca 🥰 , they struggle to look you in the eyes when speaking the truth because they are busy doing something else when lying to you
Stay strong! ❤
Join me in my free webinar - icanslay.com
Dr. Jekyll & Mr.Hyde
He has triggered PTSD pretty bad in me!
A real eye-opener
Proud of you! You got this ❤
Ptsd, yep, trying to overcome that now that I let the narc.
Oh dear,same 😢
@pattypohlit7803 same here and I just want to get better 🥺
Same. I cant keep a job because of it.
So when I was accused of being homosexual, that was a confession of what they are? Makes so much sense. Explains a lot of past behaviors
I don’t think she meant that literally. If someone accuses you of being gay doesn’t mean they’re gay! It just means they’re an idiot who trying really hard to anger you! On the other hand, some people, whether narcissistic or not, will often accuse you of cheating on them. Then you find out they’ve been the one cheating! So please don’t misunderstand the meaning and start spreading rumors that the other person is gay because that’s what you think Rebecca was saying. That’s a slippery slope that could land you in a ton of trouble! 🤷♀️
@@reneepierce569 dealing with a narcissist is a slippery slope all in its own....yes "projection" is truth they speak about themselves
I want to appreciate those that
recommended *Dr Sabo love* the on
this channel, he's very good when it comes
to spell casting, I can testify that...
@@johnsonjames702 what?
@@reneepierce569 he also constantly accused me of cheating, threatened to have me followed!!! And accusing of stealing money. All things he did. Hopefully not the following part. But I did tell him to do a background check on that person and install cameras in the house because nothing was going on.
Narcissists are just mentally damaged people who will never be normal…….you must leave a narcissist as soon as you’re able to, you must not be afraid of them, you should document/record everything in case you end up in court, you must expose them for what they really are and you must have no mercy on them whatsoever because they will destroy you in a heartbeat without thinking twice. ✊
I believe that
This woman.. is amazing I have never heard a more accurate and easy to understood explanation.. I never could understand I could never get anywhere with these type of people no matter how much I tryed to listen or be there ..
FAKERS! Amazingly Fake. Thank you again Rebecca. You truly shine a bright light of understanding on what is really happening when dealing with these people.
How are you doing now? Hope you're feeling well and getting your power back! 💪
This might help - slay.rebeccazung.com/
If you like to be generous, playful and silly make sure you chose a partner with similar qualities.
Please check this out for extra support - icanslay.com/
TRICKSTERS, FAKERS AND DEMONS IN DISGUISE!!!
Con Artists 🎨
Some are professional con artists
Any one else seen the black eyes of the narcissist? Evil incarnate!! That is when I was totally done. He is now an ex.
Yes!
I have!
Absolute horror
Yes, I've seen the black eyes! But I walked away.
Omg yes yes yes😮
12:13 changing their behavior
13:04 they don’t care about anyone but themselves
14:07 they don’t want you to know their true intentions
14:37 they don’t want you to know their true capabilities
15:25 they’re doing the bare minimum
16:02 they want you to keep buying their sales pitch
16:59 you are simply a source of supply
17:20 their life is a constant struggle
17:52 fearing people will figure out they are a fraud
I’m trying to deal with an alcoholic narcissist…it’s an enormous challenge.
Your best bet H.W. is not to "deal" with the alcoholic narcissistic, but to leave and don't look back. TRUST ME (speaking from experience). Yes, leaving will hurt at first BUT trust you will be much happier and stronger without them!
How are you doing now? Hope you're feeling well and getting your power back! 💪
This might help - slay.rebeccazung.com/
Yes, it's a double whammy when they are alcoholics too!
All of those features are classic symptoms of narcissism. After 15+ years and a divorce I finally see my ex in a different light. For all the hype and bravado, he’s really just a scared little boy. It’s very sad because it’s as though narcissists are forfeiting their true selves for some hologram. It’s also sad because there’s usually little, if anything, that can bring about any change or awareness in their lives so that their fate is sealed. Very sad indeed.
So glad you found them helpful! Keep Slaying!
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They ARE symptoms of a mental disorder
Everything you have in your videos are SPOT on. I was married to one for 32 long years. I tried so hard to make a marriage successful. But impossible to live with all the lies projecting and reflecting. Thank you so much Rebecca. I would love to make an appointment with you. Sad thing is my son has turned into his same manners of his father. I am heart broken to have divorced both husband and son.
Exactly. FAKE and FRAUD.
So sorry for You❣️Father and oldest brother the same.. to the only daughter sister in the middle..empath lovely Mother passed away...then they hurted me a lot..much more than before! No more protection of my mother...older brother and his wife no siblings parents passed away she is also a narcissist!! Then they manipulated father and he went on their side..anyway he is the first narcissist...
don't want to see them anymore ..Mother and me the beautiful ones..they can stay in their own mud!!
Sorry to hear what you've been through. You got this! Keep SLAYing!
Please check this out for extra support - icanslay.com/
Baby GET Your peace,it’s WORTH more than you think,and GOD bless you you deserve so much more Amen 🙏
Mine said everyone has secrets. After I caught him cheating. I didn't have secrets. I'm a Scorpio, you better believe after that I definitely had some secrets. I figured that I better get me some. Then I left. I'm in a good relationship now. No need for secrets. So again, don't have secrets. But I can in a heartbeat, if that's the dynamic he brings into it at some point! And you better believe if that happens, I will leave!!!
Sorry to hear what you've been through. Please check this out for extra support - icanslay.com/
@@lc4972 well he was a Scorpio and never honest with me..idk how it's a constant..but it is!
FAKE IT TILL THEY MAKE IT
@@Tashita1408 My pastor husband thinks he is doing it well.
@@Tashita1408 think about the narrative in mainstream media as well. Terrifying to think this is the norm.
Yeaah
I met an old narcissist I'd blocked a few months ago last week and he's just like all 20 of these.....so much worse than my ex. Demonstrated a lot of these in the few hours I was with them. Its amazing how someone can have all 20.
Sorry to hear about what you're going through. Check this out for extra support - icanslay.com/
Well I’m so glad to learn of narcissism and empaths. I am an empath. I feel other peoples pain to the point that I feel it physically. I also can see into a situation and people and I’m always surprised when other people can’t. I now know that I have attracted narcissists all my life. I don’t like being an empath because it hurts me. My stomach is a wreck. I’ve been called sappy, but I can’t help it. Now I know the situation with narcissists I feel armed and ready to stand tall. Since I attract narcissists my life at 77 years is full of them, but I’ve learned how to handle them. My daughter hasn’t spoken to me since Mother’s Day. I love her dearly, but now that I know what is driving her I can relax. My first husband, my daughter, my grandson, my sister in law and a friend are all narcissist. My best plan is to stay away from them and let my own valuable emotions and my stomach heal. God bless you in your work.
It doesn't really matter how close (family or not) a person is, or if they're even really a narcissist, if they're toxic they have to be cut out of your life for your own well-being, that being said, it seems unlikely that all the people you listed would be actual narcissists, probably just toxic people with some narcissistic traits. I think the word you're thinking of is "sympathy"... its when you experience the emotions of others, "empathy" is the ability to understand and relate to a person's experience without the emotional experience, so you could say you're a "sympath", but I'd just call it being a normal healthy human.
My God!! Me too!! Is it possible we attract them so we can change ourselves or even, be the mirror for them to see themselves in order to change themselves??
@@edscot9986 Its not that deep lol. Narcissists lack insight and self awareness because they don't have a "self", so they can't see themselves or change. They're attracted to people who are codependents... aka an easy mark, both are opposite sides of the same coin... the narcissist is also a codependent personality... a toxic one.
Hi! Fellow empath here. You can learn to block. I picture a glass silo around me, ground myself, take a minute and I'm ready. You can Google all about it. How to hone it, embrace it and also your intuition.
It's a blessing and a curse but with blocking and grounding it's more blessing. Take care ❤
I'm also an empath, but I saw so many red flags and got fed up with his lying and treating me like I was stupid. So, I walked away and he was totally shocked that I could throw up a boundary he can't get past.
There's no cure for them because they are too stuck occupying themselves with something
Perfect descriptions of these vile monsters.
I think when they lie about unnecessary things, they are still doing it for a reason though it seems unnecessary. Anything that keeps others away from reality in someway will make them more receptive to their deception in any way. They want others to accept their imaginary world.
And they are always "correcting" others, and judging.
Check this out for extra support - icanslay.com/
I get tired of hearing "as a child they were traumatized", blaming parents. I came out of 20 years of therapy in which my doctors deemed "catastrophic child abuse". Why did I not grow up to be a narcissistic person? From my experience I believe people make their own choices because they want to. There is no invisible parent twisting their arm.
I absolutely agree with you.
I agree. They choose to hide inside themselves but in doing so they are giving themselves over to demonic spirits that direct their actions and words. Their brains are different and if you stay with one long enough your brain will change like theirs too. That's why your health takes a toll from being with them. It's all about the limbic system in the brain - which is the seat of aggression and fear. Empaths beware. Being with them shrinks the part of the brain associated with empathy. They are not fully human.
There is a certain amount of truth to what you say. I think the childhood trauma that happens, causes the defensive behavior/survival skills to be developed. At some point, they either start to take responsibility for themselves and start to grow up, or, alternatively, they end up believing the lies they told themselves and continue in the downward spiral of self deception which becomes the full blown narc. One thing I have found is to explain things like this to myself in the most simple terms, but be careful to not oversimplify them. There can be complex twists that are important to become aware of. It's a process that they bought into at an early age and isn't always easy to break out of. I can care for them, but I cannot take care of them or heal them. That is something they have to see for themselves, reach out for help for themselves, and take steps to change for themselves.
My daughter took divorce difficult 😢
I agree. I adore my stbx’s mom. But he treats her like he treats me. I heard both sides of behaviors that caused rifts. The mom has regret and apologies. She was also young when she had him and married a useless alcoholic who was never around. Yet he idolizes his father. I think its a longing and fantasy but its no reason to lie and use people.
My mother is a covert narsissist it been the worst that's ever happened to me in my LIFE ! and all these are true !
Going through this right now, my heart hurts, my head hurts, she doesn't care about the kids, nothing, just being a lying cheater, has alienated everyone from me, talked shit with my friends, slept with my alleged best friend of 25 yrs, love life 😔 not. I'm made out to be the crazy one. I am not, I've been evaluated, it isn't me.
it's really sad dealing with such type of people in a romantic love relationship. I am a victim and i dont feel ashamed to voice it out, after the trauma, abuse and shame showed towards and against me. The love booming, attention, genuine love, spending together all ceased in one day and never was restored. Until after going through rejected, doubted myself, my worth, and sanity for few weeks, i decided to tell me myself i am not the problem, and that i did everything as a genuine and healthy person should do in a relationship and it wasn't appreciated but took for granted. Today, am listening and watching this vid and i feel blessed.
These narcissist have become so good at lying to THEMSELVES that the struggle with their reality and when the do open up about this past its a control mechanism so that they can 1. Gain sympathy 2. Play the martyr 3. Try to control 4. Project wrong actions on you!
So true!
This is my mom all day everyday. In the eyes of the public & the few friends she has left, it is top priority for her to make them think that she's "loved by everyone," everyone needs & depends on her friendship, she's delicate & would give the shirt off her back.... which she will, depending on WHO she's trying to impress. But receiving that shirt if hers secretly comes with a hefty price tag..... these same people she's trying to impress have NO IDEA
You are right
Imperfect list:
1. They have two Selves: True Self = scared little one that they hate, think is weak they want to cover up = their masquerade. False Self =
2. Lying. They do get away with it. They can’t tell the truth even tho it would make their lives easier
3. Don’t want you to know the secrets they are hiding. Lot going on they don’t want you to see. Constantly accusing you of lying…
4. They don’t want you to know all the things they have done wrong that they can’t take responsibility for.
5. They don’t want you to know that the reason why they treat you horribly is bc this is a reflection to how they feel about themselves (?) > they see something you have as valuable they want / need
6. They don’t want you to know that they are looking for ways to get attention.
7. They won’t tell you that the reason they have a hard time apologising to you: either it is your fault to begin with or… the only way they can apologise is a way of manipulating
8. They don’t want ou to know why they are punishing them. They want to hang it all on you the responsibility for the pain caused…
9. Don’t want you to know they have the problem. They are deeply unhappy inside and they don’t really know they have inside themselves
10. Everything a Narcissist does is to manipulate you: everything is a manipulation
11. They don’t want you to know they are chameleons: whatever makes them
12. They hide the fact they are looking out for Number 1 at all times. All expressions of affection or care is FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKERS IT IS ALL A MANIPULATION
13. They don’t want you to know their true intentions to use you
14. ….. Numbered points mixed up from here on
15. Don’t want you to know what they are truly capable of: how devious and nasty they are capable of > they save this for their true targets
16.
17. They don’t want you to know they are doing the bare minimum in the relationship. They want to take
18. As long as they are getting some supply out of you they are going to keep going on. They hope you are going to keep buying their…
19. You are simply a source of supply to them. As long as you have use to them they want to keep you around
20. It is literally exhausting for them … feeling empty..
21. They hide the fact they are living fearing they are a massive fraud and they fear they will be found out = where your leverage really is
I found this channel about two weeks ago after i left my lying, cheating, stealing girlfriend. I did not know she was a narcissist when i left, but this channel has taught me so much. I have literally sent her some of your videos to help explain myself and my feelings to her because she still has control over me. Im just glad i escaped and got out of there before i gave her a chance to dig her claws back in.
FAKERS !!!! Thank you Rebecca for you being here with all your videos & everyone comments here. I hoped you & everyone here to have a beautiful wonderful blessed 🙏 day.
So glad you found them helpful! You got this! Keep SLAYing!
Secrets…yes. I had to tell a couple of neighbours what was going on as he was starting to scare me and he was raging mad about it. He was having a rant saying no one should have known about HIM…….not that no one should have known about US, that one word said it all. He was ok with telling his harem and his son about what was happening as all his calls were put on speakerphone while he was bad mouthing me (it was over by then but I was still in our house until he had got the money to buy me out, which was 3 months), he just didn’t want people close by to know, of course they would have heard me telling him to get out of my bedroom which he barged into day and night without knocking so he could mouth off or intimidate and harass me. By the time I left 9 weeks ago he had already started the smear campaign saying it was me who was the problem, just like he told me his 3 ex wives and long string of ex girls friends were the problem.
My wife cheated on me and blamed it on me. It’s my fault she said. 20 years of marriage she never apologize for her wrong doing or mistakes. She hides and used me for everything. She lies so much and hide her phone. Exactly what you’re saying .
Spot on! I’ve dealt with two, after they broke me, almost. After all the pain they caused and chaos, it took me a while to realize they, like bullies are more afraid than their victims. There is no way to win. She cut me off, and it’s the best thing. Except her dad is my brother who I adore. And of course he will take her side. 😢
I wanted to have a conversation about how I was being treated and requiring proper communication, turned into a word salad backed with a tantrum on how I don't care. First time I saw some rage included and I realize it could get bad.
Its all crazy to how many demons they fight daily.. instead of just want to have empathy..I wanna know why they cant just date strippers only...
My ex narc married 3 strippers. I am not a stripper. 😂
I write down notes and put it everywhere to keep me safe and sane. And for the FAKERS!! as a extra pointer i have added *my gut feeling cant lie, I feel it and dont allow my past gaslight my present truth* thank you Rebecca, you saved me and many others 💐
So glad you found them helpful! Don't forget to hit like,share, and subscribe. Keep SLAYing!
I ignored my intuition for years. Til i was almost destriyed. My self image, my seld esteem, my ability to give or receive love again.
My wallet. I mean i hate him.
The ex a covert narcissist hid these 12 and more! SMH! NAMAslay!
Future faking. That was something I experienced but did not know it was a
“thing”…..I remember hearing all of these things she said she was going to help me with, and to me, I was just wondering how she was ever going to have the time. It sounded crazy, and at the same time she would tell me about things she wanted help with. So bizarre.
How are you doing now? Hope you're feeling well and getting your power back! 💪
This might help - slay.rebeccazung.com/
@@RebeccaZungEsq I am doing pretty well now. After six months of working though and processing what happened, I am able to put the entire experience behind me and move on. It does take time and I do think I am a different person. Thank you for your help and kindness. It really means a lot.⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Happy Lunar New Year Ms. Zung if you celebrate this occasion. After 2 years of learning about everything narcissism on your channel, I feel like 2023 is going to be a lot at ease and less confined by grudge and resentment for me personally. I still have a lot to learn till I reach the state of not reacting when hearing the names of my toxic abusers, and even more to cover if I want to keep my cool in the case of meeting them again. It surely is a very very slow healing process of tons of baby steps. But I definitely feel that a positive result is coming near.
Sorry to hear what you've been through. You got this! Keep SLAYing!
Please check this out for extra support - icanslay.com/
Yes he said he was attracted to me because I was so strong and he knew I could put up with his crap. Quote unquote. He’s milked that strength and I have nothing left.
4:57 thanks for reminding that we cant save them. it really hurts but is essential.
Number 14….their true capabilities. During one of his rages when he threatened me, he said that he would be horrible as he’s very good at it and will make me F’ing Suffer. I had started voice recording him 6 weeks or so earlier as he was starting to get nasty and this particular day was when I told him it was over for good, I said that no man had ever threatened me in my life and I wasn’t putting up with him doing it. I saw the red mist come over him and knew for my safety I had to end it and get out. It took him 3 months to raise a mortgage and get the rest of the money to buy me out of a house we had only bought 3 months earlier. He used me to help him up the property ladder to a lovely house with the full intent that he was going to have it for himself without me in it. The last 12 weeks were hell but I’m out now and glad to be rid of him at last.
Stay strong! ❤
Join me in my free webinar - icanslay.com
All right, Rebecca, four minutes into this I’m making a comment. My ex would like about anything. She never developed conversation skills skills, back to childhood. They lie and they do all these things they do and they’re so good at it because he been doing it since they were five years old. It’s the thing is he practiced in practice, and practiced more than anything in their life, getting their way at all cost and avoiding true interpersonal relationships and everything it takes to make one flourish and be successful, or even divorce with integrity and honesty. It just ain’t gonna happen with these.
People
Exactly I was told they wanted to see if they could drain me but God
My ex, a brother, a sister, and a son are Narcissists. I didn't realize my ex was a narc until two years after she left. However, about two years before she left, I quit trying to make her happy -- our married headed sharply downhill from there. So very glad she's gone.
How are you doing now? Hope you're feeling well and getting your power back! 💪
This might help - slay.rebeccazung.com/
I am currently going through family court and I have been accused of everything under the sun, which of course is all lies. The way you describe a narc in your videos is exactly what the mother of my child is like. It really is sad as my daughter is missing out on having me in her life. But I am hopeful that one day the narc will be exposed and I will get to see my daughter again. Thanks again for your videos :)
Yup 👍 the CRAZY INSIDE THEM, is definitely a lot to hide 🙈
Thank you Rebecca for helping me to educate myself about Narcissist personality Disorder. Unfortunately my family meet a man who was a narcissist who abuses his position and authority. I listened very carefully to you in regards to going to court, how to document proof and what to expect when you do go to court with a narcissist. Very soon my family will be in a civil court case with a narcissist who has ran for the hills hence his employer will be in court. I documented all contact and have written proof which according to our lawyer is amazing evidence for the case . We will more than likely win this civil case because of these written words. I honestly feel very prepared and ready to deal with this mess. I greatly appreciate your words of wisdom and expertise.
Doing great with the details , precision and accuracy. Logic and rationality is best defence against narcissists
Thank you for this information you share. Really it is helpful.
I have a small business and got my first charge back. This guy is a pice of work. I’m being charged for trust passing and theft.
I was there by his request to bring him another set of signs. He didn’t know that I knew what he did. When I got there not only was he using the signs he said was sub standard but he cut the set of magnets but they were in his trailer.
I got out of the vehicle and walked up to the trailer and took the magnets and said you can’t have it both ways. You can’t use the signs cut them up and use them as well as do a charge back. I paid the charge back I was on the property by request and I got charged with the crime.
So far it has cost me a thousand dollars to obtain an attorney,court is coming up and I will not go down as a the charges read.
Nope! Not having it.
Faker, fakers fakers
So glad you found them helpful! Keep Slaying!
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@@RebeccaZungEsq How could I not? Keeping me focused and informed.
Thank you for sharing your skills.
Lori
So glad you found them helpful! Don't forget to hit like,share, and subscribe. Keep SLAYing!
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I’m so worried for my own fake ways. Now that I understand the narcissistic tendencies I find I am the one who is faking empathy and giving false praise. Yuck. I am disgusted!
You are amazing 👏
@@cindynimmo if you recognize imperfections and admit to them, you are NOT a narcissist! Good for you!
They expose themselves in the end
For now we see through a glass darkly. But in the end, all things become clear.
7 years and many red flags I saw and kept trying because I loved her. Finally had enough and broke up with her. Through all the pain, confusion, anger, grief, loss and missing her, my immediate overwhelming feeling after the break up was relief. Rebecca and others have showed me what I refused to put together from pieces. She was a narcissist, covert I think. When a relationship ends and you feel relief, you know leaving was the right move. NEVER AGAIN! Eyes wide open……
They will never apologize. Drain you of everything.
Best way I have heard it described.
Public self - Work, etc
Private self - Home, family
Secret self - lying, cheating, stealing, etc...
I caught mine doing all 3. Would never admit to any of it after being caught.
Thank you! Rebecca, you have been a great coach and encouragement to me. I have slayed the Narcs by exposing them and staying true to myself.
I'm glad to be helping! You got this! 💪
Thank you for all you do! Damn! What I just experienced for the past 6 1/2 years. No connection to her. Except that she is the manager of the building I live in and is right below me. The kicker is that she conned the owner of a small 15 unit apt. building to the extent that he has become one of her 'flying monkeys"'! And now for my own sanity I have to move, and being on a fixed income , having the best unit, the best view, no winter heat bill, with cable and internet included has got me into my first ever
panic attack last week.
How are you doing now? Hope you're feeling well and getting your power back! 💪
This might help - slay.rebeccazung.com/
You say they want to hide their true self, but my experience tells me different. They do open up with their inner thoughts. I won't go into detail cause it's wrong, but they do at times share with you.
That's what made it all the more difficult for me to accept.
The blame game is hard to live with. The projection is painful.
Hating themselves - again my experience is a liittle difffrrent. My ex did on occasion say that to me.
After a couple months of going through all the emotions, and now trying to get on with my life, i find it all sad.
Sad for the unnecessary pain thats been caused. Sad at the mess of the after affects. Sad that someone has the ability to treat someone else like that. Sad that there's another person lying in wait. And most importantly for me, I'm sad that there's not more out there to help them. Yes, i hear loud and clear that they may not deserve it, but, i dont wish them harm or ill health. I wish them to see, recognise, and seek the correct help. 2024, there's so much more available. I know it's down to the individual to want it.
We get told not to let them know that we know, but that don't wash with me. I'll let you know every time, consequences or not. It's my duty to call you out. What you do with that is down to you. I've done my bit, now do yours.
Right or wrong, just my opinion.
If I just ignore my problem, then it will just go away.
I was a victim of this I had to figure out this all alone that my own family were narcissistic both parents have this dark energy I was a child struggling to figure out what's really going on here I've been treated horribly and I had to stand up for my children and granddaughter and daughter n law I'm drew the line it's over no more mind games hate and abuse playing victim and hurting and manipulating I not allowing them to touch us 💯
God Bless you for ALL you do to help us against this evil. Very thankful for your videos such an amazing resource to help us
Love your videos, all you said is true!! Thank you for all the help through your videos.
So glad you found them helpful! Don't forget to hit like,share, and subscribe. Keep SLAYing!
that absolutely breaks my heart as a mother to think my child hates himself so much that he has to torture me. It doesn’t make me feel good. Makes me feel like I wanna just fix him. I want him to be happy and love himself. What do I do I’m in such asituation that my life is just stopped halted. Cannot go forward. I just lay here and suffer.
It's my daughter in law, I'm her food, she feeds on me , my husband and my son( her hubby)
I was very nice to her coz I didn't know she was a narc.
After having her 1st baby boy she changed and made my son against me.
Ppl tell me let her go but my husband wants his son to be withhim😢
I was raised by one and my sibling is one as well. Obviously, I now have mental health issues, but I know everything about them. I could literally write a book. The best thing to do is no contact.
Fakers Fakers Fakers. I'm listening to you.
You got this! 💪
Agree with every one of these points. Two and half years, have not reacted, engaged, defended any accusations and they are still attacking. The most hideous outcome is that the kids are under their spell. I equate not engaging, being culpable and living a good life as an open door for them to reflect, my kids. They are and always be my primary concern, don't want a relationship. May sound sad though I am happy and blessed. As a builder I bought a site, built a home and loved evert inhabitant. When I got I'll the narc went to work. Thank you, you're insight is spot on, no regrets ❤️
You really dont know how you are saving me.
Wow,....
All the above hit big 😮.
I just detached myself from him, however he lives with my brother in law and sister, so i still may bump into him.
I truly believe he has moved on and is not bothered by the separation at all.
But, all these apply😮
May I add, I don't want a relationship with anyone else. My kids are and always will be paramount in my thoughts, forgive my grammar and thanks for this channel. 🙏
Oh my ! I am reading/hearing you say the thoughts I have about “a narcissist “ that I figured must have gone through a textbook description of how they got to here. I’ve watched this two faced pattern and they can be very convincing when they have an agenda. Once they have their “victim” baited, they use them, lie and cheat to get to their end goal. I have some good reading to do. Thank you!
Thanks, Rebecca. The narc who targeted me was particularly diabolical. As my primary care physician who had put me on antidepressants, she had inside information into almost everything. And having me on a psychotropic medication, she could easily say I was the crazy one. Then manipulated me into undergoing a physical exam where she fondled my privates.
What the living hell?
Wow I'm dealing with a text book narcissist. Lord this is crazy making. Thank you for all of your videos, it's so appreciated.
How are you doing now? Hope you're feeling well and getting your power back! 💪
This might help - slay.rebeccazung.com/
So true 🥰 , Rebecca 🥰
They talk so much 🙃 for attention that they lie to have something to tell everyone because they need to grandstand
You got this! 💪
way to much, they don't take time to breathe lol
Thank you, thank you, thank you. I'm so good with myself since I started to watch your videos. Grateful
So glad you found them helpful! Keep Slaying!
Check this out for extra support - icanslay.com/
How i wish there'd been t'internet years ago... too late for me after a toxic 40yr marriage when I was led to believe problems were my fault...😕
You have been a great help for me and my understanding narcissistic people on how to spot and deal with them.
Your a veil lifter !
And much appreciated.
Stay strong! ❤
Join me in my free webinar - icanslay.com
Those that have finally left the narcissist good for you. All the videos I would see but I kept thinking and saying to myself “no my spouse is different this can’t be”. Well that mind set got me in a situation that is very very difficult. She accused me of being a narcissist and I believed her and I would go get help but all the counseling that I would do they suggested codependency. I’m now dealing with the repercussions of her lies and manipulation and of course of my actions I fell for her trap because I ignored everything. Those of you dealing with a narcissist please take all this information and walk away for your health and safety. Again I kept thinking that my spouse was the exception and now I have a lot to deal with 😔.. I’m an empath and a codependent so I was easy target
Excellent video. I just got my final draft for my uncontested divorce and it is close getting rid of the narcissist.
Stay strong! ❤
Join me in my free webinar - icanslay.com
I've been married to a narcissist for 4 years and did not see it coming until he burned our house and vehicle to the ground and abandoned me 2 hours from my home and it's the best thing that actually could have happened to me because of that my children saw I was not the problem in the issue and did not have insane thoughts I truly see now what kind of a man he is and my children will have nothing to do with him ever again
i hate the thought of my son thinking and doing these things that people are calling evil and a monster and there’s nothing that anyone can do to make them normal nothing at all . he is 100% covert narcissist!
God bless you Rebecca, you have helped me more than you'll ever know.
YES IM LOOKING FOR A LAWYER THAT'S KNOWS ABOUT THEM THANK YOU TAMMY
Wow. I dealt with this today after a break up. I found out he was lying about pretty much EVERYTHING.
Do these narcs attempt suicide? My mother in law show all these behaviours. Currently she is living with my husband and myself. It's been a year that she is under my roof, she verbally abuses me, then tells my husband (her son) I verbally attacked her, or that I have hit her. She has attempted suicide s few times since I have know her. What really makes me furious is that my husband does not see through all her lies , it's come to a point where I am ready to leave the house and go and stay with my son. She sleeps with a large kitchen knife under her pillow and has told me that she's not done with me. My husband does not take her serious