Steven Seagal

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 15 มี.ค. 2020
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    Audio is from Cum Town, Episode 36 - Goatee Era Seagal (1/18/2017), with guest Ben O'Brien
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ความคิดเห็น • 13K

  • @ClangersTV
    @ClangersTV  6 หลายเดือนก่อน +146

    Nick Mullen: The Year of the Dragon - FULL COMEDY SPECIAL: th-cam.com/video/VBlQBm5pReQ/w-d-xo.html

    • @bong_water_chug5515
      @bong_water_chug5515 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +15

      Hell yeah dude

    • @youtubeviolatedme7123
      @youtubeviolatedme7123 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      I don't know if I enjoyed Nick's or Stav's special better. Both probably make my top 10 specials of 2023 for sure though.

    • @Scott-fy7fm
      @Scott-fy7fm 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

      This seagal review is one of my favorite videos on TH-cam, it is absolutely hilarious, well done

  • @paulmarchano7238
    @paulmarchano7238 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3651

    The way Seagal holds his rifle is completely embarrassing.

    • @smuketherealbigboyman
      @smuketherealbigboyman 4 ปีที่แล้ว +417

      Paul Marchano “fatly going around corners”

    • @patrickstar6458
      @patrickstar6458 4 ปีที่แล้ว +278

      "Stock propped up on his shoulder"

    • @jeremylim2421
      @jeremylim2421 4 ปีที่แล้ว +258

      A little higher and he'll be holding it like a rocket launcher.

    • @NebMunb
      @NebMunb 4 ปีที่แล้ว +81

      I had to rewind every time he held a rifle, just to laugh at how bad it was

    • @theDudeOfDudes
      @theDudeOfDudes 4 ปีที่แล้ว +110

      The fact that it was still so out of control and flipping around in his limp hand when firing BLANKS was hilarious.

  • @geekers8644
    @geekers8644 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4516

    the way he just says 'whats happenin' to a 5 year old romanian child killed me lmaoo

    • @devintariel3769
      @devintariel3769 4 ปีที่แล้ว +85

      "CHE MA FARTS"

    • @zachary4279
      @zachary4279 4 ปีที่แล้ว +227

      “Was hanin”

    • @KimchiMaster
      @KimchiMaster 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Hahahaha

    • @TheLordZoka
      @TheLordZoka 4 ปีที่แล้ว +273

      He might as well been like “How’s it hangin, lil’ n*gga?”

    • @SomeRandomJackAss
      @SomeRandomJackAss 4 ปีที่แล้ว +38

      Does she even speak English? And if so, why?

  • @Mhammerable
    @Mhammerable ปีที่แล้ว +798

    they should have cast him for Tropic Thunder and just told him it was an actual action movie

    • @incogn3gr0
      @incogn3gr0 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +46

      That would have been brilliant

    • @balefulbunny
      @balefulbunny 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +16

      The idea of Big Seagull in that movie has my imagination running wild! Woulda been great!

    • @bob3007
      @bob3007 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

      @@balefulbunny if reality ever gets reset, i vote @Mhammerable to be in charge lmaoo. my head is spinning with the possible hilarity that idea entails. SHANE GILLIS!!!! IF YOU READ THIS!!! steal this mans idea and make this a sketch lmao... a concept this good can't be squandered by the likes of... _network television_

    • @Obiniu
      @Obiniu วันที่ผ่านมา +1

      @@bob3007 the humor of this absolutely disappears after turning it into a sketch as all of it relays on the authenticity of Steven's performance

    • @bob3007
      @bob3007 22 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

      @@Obiniu good point 🤙🤙

  • @TheValorous
    @TheValorous ปีที่แล้ว +2643

    "34, he isn't a.. young guy.."
    That got this 35 year old's eye a bit teary.

    • @spets4265
      @spets4265 ปีที่แล้ว +192

      Don't feel bad, when I was 21 everyone older than 25 was 'ancient'. I can guarantee you its the same with the guys commentating.

    • @CrazyPlatinum92
      @CrazyPlatinum92 ปีที่แล้ว +52

      I'll be 31 in a week...

    • @mikewood4242
      @mikewood4242 ปีที่แล้ว +100

      @@spets4265 When I was 26 I was callled an "old man" by chicks 20 at the bar

    • @jellybean4049
      @jellybean4049 ปีที่แล้ว +48

      I just turned 32 and people call me a kid still. Some woman said "Ahhh! Your still a baby." Little strange but I guess theses guys are all 20 - 24 or so.

    • @mikevandemark1993
      @mikevandemark1993 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      They have 35 is middle aged 😂

  • @Lulzorz125
    @Lulzorz125 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5169

    I love the way he holds guns. The stock is like never in contact with his shoulder. He's so fuckin strong he just absorbs all the recoil with his limp wrists lmao.

    • @marcusg3824
      @marcusg3824 3 ปีที่แล้ว +193

      I thought I was the only one who noticed. It’s amazing

    • @DONALDSON51
      @DONALDSON51 3 ปีที่แล้ว +306

      Or the way he swaps sides with his rifle without a care for the empty cases that will fly into his face :)

    • @ken7165
      @ken7165 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      🤣🤣🤣

    • @roblangada4516
      @roblangada4516 3 ปีที่แล้ว +193

      He puts the stock over his shoulder like its an RPG, amazing.

    • @anonymousdoggo8982
      @anonymousdoggo8982 3 ปีที่แล้ว +215

      You can shoot any gun that way no problem. Especially a 12 gauge..... No shouldering required. You barely hold the gun and your trigger finger absorbs all the recoil for best accuracy. All 65 year old ultra special undercover secret black ops guys know this.

  • @MohammadObaid52
    @MohammadObaid52 3 ปีที่แล้ว +16507

    Fun fact: Seagal has claimed once to be immune to any chokeholds. In order to prove it, he had a stuntman put him in a chokehold. Seagal promptly lost consciousness and also shit himself.

    • @ChucksSEADnDEAD
      @ChucksSEADnDEAD 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1348

      Good Ole Gene Lebell

    • @user-vs6oe8fl3m
      @user-vs6oe8fl3m 3 ปีที่แล้ว +306

      Hahahahahahahahhayahahahahahha

    • @JamesMooreMarketing
      @JamesMooreMarketing 3 ปีที่แล้ว +849

      No Gene also put him in a hold.
      There was a stunt man who's team complained Seagal was being too rough.
      When Seagal heard the stunt guy was some belt in an art form he told him put him in a choke and he get out of it.
      The stunt guys boss said go ahead and old steven could not get out of it and after a bit of straining he tapped and headed straight to the toilets 😂

    • @MohammadObaid52
      @MohammadObaid52 3 ปีที่แล้ว +90

      @@JamesMooreMarketing Hahaha, thank you for the clarification on the story mate :)

    • @alexandermccarthy
      @alexandermccarthy 3 ปีที่แล้ว +417

      The true (skid) mark of a great warrior! 😁 😁 😁

  • @sebastianlightcap2764
    @sebastianlightcap2764 ปีที่แล้ว +565

    "Well, it started with Glimmer Man and now it's progressed to the point where he just talks like a slave" had me dying laughing

    • @marthaw7664
      @marthaw7664 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      Making movies in Moscow…….he is Шлях трафи

  • @only1smally
    @only1smally ปีที่แล้ว +312

    About every six months I check in on this masterpiece.

    • @reriks03
      @reriks03 25 วันที่ผ่านมา +4

      This is so gold.

  • @caseytodd7632
    @caseytodd7632 2 ปีที่แล้ว +11953

    A lot of people don't know this, but Steven Seagal actually knows karate, taekwando, judo, jiu jitsu and many other types of dangerous words.

    • @alfredroa9437
      @alfredroa9437 2 ปีที่แล้ว +226

      King of improv

    • @Gibbernak
      @Gibbernak 2 ปีที่แล้ว +58

      Nice

    • @waitaminute-113
      @waitaminute-113 2 ปีที่แล้ว +315

      I’m not gonna lie you got me in that first half

    • @CoolPandaTheMovieNerd
      @CoolPandaTheMovieNerd 2 ปีที่แล้ว +190

      He's been doing martial arts for 85 years

    • @Hastur876
      @Hastur876 2 ปีที่แล้ว +133

      @@CoolPandaTheMovieNerd Marshmallow arts more like

  • @no-zz3br
    @no-zz3br 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3158

    "fatly coming around a corner"

  • @Kgcottawa
    @Kgcottawa 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +182

    “Fatly going around corners”
    Omfg I died from laughter

  • @ryh5169
    @ryh5169 ปีที่แล้ว +185

    4:33 "Are you really as good as they ALL say you are" -- The fact she added "all" ("they say" wasn't enough -- no, it must be UNANIMOUS) is proof Seagal himself wrote that line

  • @dslkjvoxicuyhgl4554
    @dslkjvoxicuyhgl4554 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8920

    He's sniping from 5 feet away, shooting at a devout taliban islamist I'd presume, who is drinking liquor, out of a flask. it's amazing.

    • @lukeg452
      @lukeg452 4 ปีที่แล้ว +224

      Why Would you ever hire him instead of vandamme

    • @TheSchematican
      @TheSchematican 4 ปีที่แล้ว +223

      Uteop He served two tours in Foreverever Land with Frank Dux bro. Jokes aside does the first bullet hit the flask and dent it? Lol

    • @lukeg452
      @lukeg452 4 ปีที่แล้ว +38

      M Lo i thought it was some type of anti material rifle or some shit

    • @dslkjvoxicuyhgl4554
      @dslkjvoxicuyhgl4554 4 ปีที่แล้ว +47

      @@TheSchematican Oh man, I'd forgotten about Frank Dux. Thank you for mentioning him. And it looked like it may have, which I imagine it wouldn't in real life, it would completely over penetrate and leave a very clean entry and exit.

    • @evanabbott2737
      @evanabbott2737 4 ปีที่แล้ว +72

      I like how he needs to shoot the flask first....😁

  • @nvm7438
    @nvm7438 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5012

    Him wearing his sunglasses while sniping is the funniest thing ever

    • @falkenfluegel
      @falkenfluegel 4 ปีที่แล้ว +153

      They even had to retouch the reflection of the sunglasses. You could probably see the camera in the reflection or something.

    • @OldSchool82
      @OldSchool82 4 ปีที่แล้ว +167

      not to the guy he fuckin shot from 50 yards away,he was thinkn "thats the coolest mutherfucker ive ever see"**** (pink mist.)

    • @chrisvig123
      @chrisvig123 4 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      It’s so realistic come on 😀💩💩💩💩

    • @anthonymiller934
      @anthonymiller934 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @Southern Fun haha

    • @mikehawk1673
      @mikehawk1673 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      Jules D lol that’s not super far fetched I’ve shot my scoped rifle with my glasses on

  • @YouMakeItHappen
    @YouMakeItHappen 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +125

    I listen to this probably once a month

    • @filmer197
      @filmer197 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

      lol me too,still funny :)

    • @drunkenmmamaster419
      @drunkenmmamaster419 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      Same my favorite clip from CT

    • @threesixn1ne
      @threesixn1ne 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

      I had a dividin' rods tells me there's gold in dem hillz.

    • @markusneulaniemi1704
      @markusneulaniemi1704 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      at least tenth time for me.. everytime I hear his name I wound up here

  • @awildwildwes
    @awildwildwes 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +58

    "There's three human transactions in this movie"
    10/10

  • @thedillonsmith1
    @thedillonsmith1 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6095

    I literally fell on the floor when I heard Seagal's voice and realized that they weren't exaggerating at all.

    • @norsemanbushcrafting1621
      @norsemanbushcrafting1621 4 ปีที่แล้ว +209

      Proposition steve

    • @GochaProductions
      @GochaProductions 4 ปีที่แล้ว +243

      I thought he was fucking kidding when he said they sold her to a pedophile.

    • @chunyi1618
      @chunyi1618 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      norseman bushcrafting ooo

    • @JB_inks
      @JB_inks 4 ปีที่แล้ว +38

      Did you literally fall on the floor?

    • @Parrskey77
      @Parrskey77 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      man what the fuck am i missing with his movies XD

  • @caffeinatedbuffalosauce883
    @caffeinatedbuffalosauce883 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5344

    I love how the Muslim Islamist is drinking alcohol in his movie

    • @joeschmoe9154
      @joeschmoe9154 3 ปีที่แล้ว +759

      You'd drink too if the only operations they sent you on were against Fat ass Seagal/

    • @hangukhiphop
      @hangukhiphop 3 ปีที่แล้ว +433

      Muslim Islamist? lol

    • @ridalger16
      @ridalger16 3 ปีที่แล้ว +172

      @@hangukhiphop makes sense not every Muslim is a radical

    • @ridalger16
      @ridalger16 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Hahaha

    • @ginogatash4030
      @ginogatash4030 3 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      @@hangukhiphop I was about to say exactly that.

  • @jamespuffer2889
    @jamespuffer2889 ปีที่แล้ว +61

    “He talks like a slave”
    My fucking sides are in orbit, I’m dying 😂

  • @siegoloko7981
    @siegoloko7981 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +69

    “Limp wristly firing the gun” is brilliant

  • @Gumfondle
    @Gumfondle 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3869

    “Are you really as good as they all say you are?”
    “eryaghfjwnbs”

    • @musiclaboratory9694
      @musiclaboratory9694 4 ปีที่แล้ว +157

      Goddamn it that was fuckin hilarious

    • @andreipulosul1492
      @andreipulosul1492 3 ปีที่แล้ว +61

      What did he actually say lmao

    • @weedwin7356
      @weedwin7356 3 ปีที่แล้ว +129

      @@andreipulosul1492 'every once in a while' lmao

    • @fpsrtsgaming708
      @fpsrtsgaming708 3 ปีที่แล้ว +89

      @@weedwin7356 *EVRYONCEANAWHILE*

    • @babbisp1
      @babbisp1 3 ปีที่แล้ว +27

      4:32

  • @caseytatum5837
    @caseytatum5837 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1943

    steven seagal sounds like hes physically exerting himself just by talking

    • @Ramsey276one
      @Ramsey276one 3 ปีที่แล้ว +47

      HE EVEN LAGS LIKE A CHEAP COMPUTER!!
      XD

    • @johnt.campbell316
      @johnt.campbell316 3 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      He is.

    • @aaronm97oh10
      @aaronm97oh10 3 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      at this point in time - he's killing himself by simply talking outside of "slavery" accent

    • @Jeneric81
      @Jeneric81 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I can swear I saw a Seagal movie where it was obvious someone else was doing his ADR with a half assed impression.

    • @KEN-1991
      @KEN-1991 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      No wonder why Seagal whispers everytime he talks,
      I can never hear a thing he’s saying most of the time.

  • @oneandy2
    @oneandy2 ปีที่แล้ว +29

    The old guy is Dale Dye, retired USMC captain. He sometimes plays minor roles in films but his primary thing is consultant/trainer. He's been involved in a TON of great stuff from Band of Brothers to Platoon. I'm amazed he lowered himself to this level. I hope he charged Segal a shitload of money.

    • @itsconnorstime
      @itsconnorstime ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Being in the same room as him must have been a huge blow to Seagals ego.

  • @discingaround
    @discingaround ปีที่แล้ว +168

    40 years later he’s still flipping dozens of opponents by barely moving his finger, and sometimes he’s even seated. Some will say that it’s all staged and not real at all, but the Steven Seagal School of Pinky Fighting certifies each match so you know no cheating is happening. What an inspiration for us all.

    • @psplayer1344
      @psplayer1344 ปีที่แล้ว

      It's really noble of them to do that. I'm just not used to the big guy looking out for me. Perhaps we should worship him as a god?

  • @djesun1
    @djesun1 ปีที่แล้ว +7018

    Steven Seagal is the kind of guy that wakes up the entire family to let them know that he's going to bed

    • @lhaviland8602
      @lhaviland8602 ปีที่แล้ว +151

      WHY IS THIS SO ACCURATE!?

    • @planes3333
      @planes3333 ปีที่แล้ว +66

      ughhh "immm going ....to....bed...ok uhhhh🤣

    • @TheReelDealFilmReviews
      @TheReelDealFilmReviews ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I’m na get me maaa slippers motherfuckers

    • @Prototheria
      @Prototheria ปีที่แล้ว +53

      I'm totally ripping off RCR here, but I think it fits.
      Steven Seagull is the kind of guy that shits himself but keeps singing happy birthday.

    • @TheReelDealFilmReviews
      @TheReelDealFilmReviews ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@Prototheria I would love a pet Seagull called Steven Seagull 🤣. I have a Miniature Schnauzer called Arnold Schnauzernegger 😊. Yes I agree 😂

  • @pvanny
    @pvanny 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3561

    To use “Fatly” as an adverb genuinely kills me

    • @joeyeulo1489
      @joeyeulo1489 3 ปีที่แล้ว +95

      I think "fatly" is my favorite new word 😂

    • @mattholt1388
      @mattholt1388 3 ปีที่แล้ว +39

      I use it all the god damn time now

    • @HorizonPerson
      @HorizonPerson 3 ปีที่แล้ว +25

      And it fits perfectly 😂

    • @Neo2266.
      @Neo2266. 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Fatly, dumbly, uglyly

    • @euroshopperbier1337
      @euroshopperbier1337 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      rip

  • @thewardenofoz3324
    @thewardenofoz3324 ปีที่แล้ว +94

    I gotta say, the editing here is top notch. When Nick switches gears, the clips also switch to match exactly what he's talking about.

  • @warframeees8013
    @warframeees8013 ปีที่แล้ว +45

    The way he shoots the gun has me dying 😂

  • @UhYeahNoThanks
    @UhYeahNoThanks 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8249

    The fact Seagal choses to remain completely clothed during the sex scene says to me that he's aware of how he looks

    • @terrybird993
      @terrybird993 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1458

      or the woman only agreed to do the scene if he was fully clothed... dudes a real sleaze ball...

    • @pingpongpogo
      @pingpongpogo 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1204

      Pretty sure the leather jacket is now a part of him.

    • @roberttimothy1338
      @roberttimothy1338 3 ปีที่แล้ว +114

      Maybe just maybe he comes from the old school of thought that you don't get unclothed with a woman unless you are married to that woman. Dummy.

    • @thiagohenriquecoelhodesouz1795
      @thiagohenriquecoelhodesouz1795 3 ปีที่แล้ว +381

      @@roberttimothy1338 LOL

    • @ralphfi9591
      @ralphfi9591 3 ปีที่แล้ว +300

      Or may be his belly weight might physically prevent her from getting close

  • @TukTukWorldwide
    @TukTukWorldwide 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2059

    "this is my sister"
    "WHATS HAPP'NIN"
    holy shit i nearly fell off my chair

    • @Tom135
      @Tom135 4 ปีที่แล้ว +39

      "Stranger danger!"

    • @FridgeLoud
      @FridgeLoud 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      😂😂😂

    • @TheWatchFrogs
      @TheWatchFrogs 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      I was laughing so hard I started to cry hahaha

    • @afrocoolio25
      @afrocoolio25 4 ปีที่แล้ว +38

      I about pissed myself. Wtf greets a little 6 or 7-year-old kid like that?

    • @Shadowboost
      @Shadowboost 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@TheSchematican the little sister? Open up, this is the FBI

  • @chikitabowow
    @chikitabowow 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +67

    7:35 I love that line so god damn much, "Fattily going around corners" made me cry laughing because it so encapsulates all of Steven Seagals movies from the last 30 years 🤣

  • @KPsTboy
    @KPsTboy ปีที่แล้ว +51

    If they were ever to make a biopic of Steven Seagull he should be played by Danny McBride.

    • @itsconnorstime
      @itsconnorstime ปีที่แล้ว +7

      McBride would have to put weight on.

    • @KPsTboy
      @KPsTboy ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@itsconnorstime Fair enough 😁

    • @Drazakhan_Dynasty
      @Drazakhan_Dynasty 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      SEAGAL: A Life. Starring: Steven Seagal.

    • @austincanady4670
      @austincanady4670 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@Drazakhan_Dynasty guys, it should obviously be Will Sasso playing Steven Seagal in the biopic.

  • @jacksonmacpherson6101
    @jacksonmacpherson6101 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3763

    Seagal is just the navy seal copypasta in human form.

  • @NCRRanger7753
    @NCRRanger7753 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2117

    "He's fatly going around corners." Lmfao 😂

    • @bluecheesehasmoldinit
      @bluecheesehasmoldinit ปีที่แล้ว +50

      He's gotta be very careful with those corners. He might pop like the balloon he is.

    • @corygriffiths4394
      @corygriffiths4394 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      Steven should be respected he’s the greatest Buffet Master of all time

    • @Simp_Zone
      @Simp_Zone ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Sounds like yo mamma!

    • @legitbeans9078
      @legitbeans9078 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      I feel bad for the corners. His weight could do some serious damage if and when he loses his balance while fatly moving near them.

    • @glenneric1
      @glenneric1 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      Best adverb yet.

  • @SwissSauce
    @SwissSauce 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +23

    “the russian mafia sounds pretty reasonable” FUCKING GOLD

  • @andrewmyles4712
    @andrewmyles4712 ปีที่แล้ว +337

    Stav’s laugh around 4:15 is my favorite thing and brings actual joy to my life. That and my wife and daughter

    • @skarloeythomas5172
      @skarloeythomas5172 ปีที่แล้ว +27

      That’s gay. Literally, so well done.

    • @D00dman
      @D00dman ปีที่แล้ว +11

      I thought you were gay

    • @hydraliskin
      @hydraliskin 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      yeah its contagious :D

    • @Kevin-mx4vm
      @Kevin-mx4vm 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

      Same, your wife and daughter.

    • @jaysalisbury193
      @jaysalisbury193 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      I can only agree with half of that sentiment. If you could see my wife, you'd understand why 😢 Turns out a once solid 3 doesn't get any better after 10 years, 4 kids and 50lbs, unfortunately.

  • @anthonyrosa4973
    @anthonyrosa4973 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1596

    HE KEPT HIS JACKET ON FOR THE SEX SCENE LMFAO

    • @nickmattio3397
      @nickmattio3397 3 ปีที่แล้ว +66

      He’s got a lot of fun hidden things in his pockets

    • @adhhxgxhhg
      @adhhxgxhhg 3 ปีที่แล้ว +128

      It's a tactical move.

    • @brucewallace1600
      @brucewallace1600 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@nickmattio3397 whoop. Like that

    • @joeschmoe9154
      @joeschmoe9154 3 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      Good lord ,,, Do you really want to see him without a shirt?

    • @sloaneisenbart9347
      @sloaneisenbart9347 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      prolly pulls it out through his underwear to pee

  • @DieForDethklok11
    @DieForDethklok11 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1651

    he talks like robert downey junior in tropic thunder talking about the jeffersons

    • @anthonymiller934
      @anthonymiller934 4 ปีที่แล้ว +23

      YES!! That's exactly the character I was thinking. Downey killed that role!

    • @M2Mil7er
      @M2Mil7er 4 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      and looks like Danny McBride has been playing him for the last 15 years,

    • @scottthomas9022
      @scottthomas9022 4 ปีที่แล้ว +31

      @@M2Mil7er Now I want to make a Steven Segal Movie but swap out Danny McBride and not tell anyone. Put Segal in the credits, and on the poster. But when you see the movie it's Just Danny McBride

    • @Salamander676
      @Salamander676 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      He's got a little Chicano twang in his voice too

    • @NickHunter
      @NickHunter 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      "whayddya mean 'you people'?"

  • @Jukkala
    @Jukkala ปีที่แล้ว +105

    I've easily watched this video five times and it still cracks me up. Using "fatly" as an adverb is the best part.
    Edit: I find myself watching this every day. It's better than an anti-depressant.

  • @Stravalnak
    @Stravalnak 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +29

    I’ve only seen this video about 50 times and it already is one of my all time favourites.

  • @ZX-ou5op
    @ZX-ou5op 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2423

    "Fatly going around corners..."
    I'm fucking dead.

    • @morzus6027
      @morzus6027 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      🤣🤣🤣🤣

    • @M1tjakaramazov
      @M1tjakaramazov 3 ปีที่แล้ว +36

      “His body sucks...” 😂

    • @kevinshaw4569
      @kevinshaw4569 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      can tell u do not know what respect is shure can tell your mom and dad did not teach u it

    • @mrdantruckerman
      @mrdantruckerman 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      One of the greatest lines ever said.lmao

    • @lucian5389
      @lucian5389 3 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      @@kevinshaw4569 I bet you walk fatly

  • @quezbot3663
    @quezbot3663 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2270

    "That means one of us has to die." Said Steven Seagal to the bacon double cheeseburger.

    • @leighbelk769
      @leighbelk769 2 ปีที่แล้ว +76

      The burger got revenge later, by giving Seagal terrible diarrhea.

    • @leighbelk769
      @leighbelk769 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @Casey R. Fair.

    • @quakethedoombringer
      @quakethedoombringer 2 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      @@leighbelk769 more like a cardiac arrest

    • @leighbelk769
      @leighbelk769 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @@quakethedoombringer Yeah, makes sense.

    • @thanktink4328
      @thanktink4328 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Hahahahahahahah

  • @Kellylovescats576
    @Kellylovescats576 ปีที่แล้ว +110

    You guys are hysterical. I could listen to this a 1000 times. 😂

    • @cardinalbeast24
      @cardinalbeast24 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +12

      It’s a podcast called Cumtown lol, has since turned into The Adam Friedland Show

    • @hardcoreclassicenjoyer
      @hardcoreclassicenjoyer 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      I've been back here twice in two days and a minimum of 5 times since I first watched it. It's pure joy

  • @karnagilgamesh3095
    @karnagilgamesh3095 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    "Just fatly going around corners." Incredible 😂 This guy's amazing.

  • @GarrisonFall
    @GarrisonFall ปีที่แล้ว +1889

    "Fatly going around corners". A brilliant description.

    • @MarieAntoinetteandherlittlesis
      @MarieAntoinetteandherlittlesis ปีที่แล้ว +44

      Dude that was so fucking hilarious because then they show the scene and that is EXACTLY what’s happening. It’s such an apt description.

    • @DefendYoungstown
      @DefendYoungstown ปีที่แล้ว +31

      ​@@MarieAntoinetteandherlittlesis yeah, just gut and gun barrel.
      A close second is where he's "limp-wristedly firing" and they show him just turn the gun like he's nonchalantly turning off an oversized water valve to shut off the yard sprinkler instead of actually participating in a firefight.

    • @jonathankeith6971
      @jonathankeith6971 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      It’s seriously one of my favorite lines. I come back to it every time and still giggle.

    • @Flat_Earth_Addy
      @Flat_Earth_Addy ปีที่แล้ว +4

      lol

    • @mandlakei3053
      @mandlakei3053 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      😂😂😂😂😂

  • @MerkinMuffly
    @MerkinMuffly 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11752

    Don't mess with the Gravy Seals

    • @MrAdamske
      @MrAdamske 3 ปีที่แล้ว +121

      bringing a whole new meaning to 'hot insertion' xD

    • @FreqBand
      @FreqBand 3 ปีที่แล้ว +22

      gray seals ?

    • @ArcherOmix
      @ArcherOmix 3 ปีที่แล้ว +385

      Meal Team 6, Semper Pie brother

    • @plmokm33
      @plmokm33 3 ปีที่แล้ว +70

      "The goddamn cook's a seal?!?!"

    • @SheikhDeezNuts
      @SheikhDeezNuts 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Lmao

  • @subkreature
    @subkreature 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +24

    Seagal also insists on this editing technique that involves removing frames in action scenes to make him appear to move faster and hit harder. I love it.

  • @_TheDarkHalf
    @_TheDarkHalf ปีที่แล้ว +8

    The accuracy of the voice impression before hearing him talk literally ☠️

  • @MeshuggahDave.
    @MeshuggahDave. 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1828

    I would bet money Segal watches his own movies, often.

    • @babymammoth34
      @babymammoth34 4 ปีที่แล้ว +65

      I have very little difficulty believing he does.

    • @zyala
      @zyala 3 ปีที่แล้ว +159

      I remember one story of segal’s talent agent walking in to see him sobbing in front of computer. He asked Segal why and segal said, “I think I just read the best damn script ever written.” His agent replied “Hang on, I didn’t forward you any new scripts. Who’s this one by?” And Segal turns to him to whisper, “Me.”

    • @geneambas8714
      @geneambas8714 3 ปีที่แล้ว +44

      @@zyala The story is from Rob Schneider

    • @Sandwich420
      @Sandwich420 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      I bet he's never even seen a movie in his life

    • @MOON1388
      @MOON1388 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Narrating along the way

  • @hamnchee
    @hamnchee 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1856

    Segal sounds like Robert Downey Jr as the black guy in Tropic Thunder.

    • @kevinthomas2906
      @kevinthomas2906 3 ปีที่แล้ว +30

      Ha! Lincoln Osiris!

    • @franmadaraki616
      @franmadaraki616 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      RDJ is far more better

    • @tehrobotjesus
      @tehrobotjesus 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @Rocky Dennis do you mean Robert Downey Syndrome?

    • @PaulieAFantoneJays19
      @PaulieAFantoneJays19 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      That's an insult to the character in Tropic Thunder! 😂😝😂

    • @CharacterMatterz
      @CharacterMatterz 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @Michael W there you are...
      I knew I wasn't the only one 😁

  • @DodgaOfficial
    @DodgaOfficial ปีที่แล้ว +69

    Steven Seagal is definitely the movie star of all time, every movie he makes is a movie and it really shows the imagery on screen

  • @GreekIrish
    @GreekIrish หลายเดือนก่อน +7

    This video got me into Cumtown and I haven't been the same since

    • @fct4life
      @fct4life 6 วันที่ผ่านมา

      same

  • @blenderguru
    @blenderguru 2 ปีที่แล้ว +904

    fatly going around corners

    • @tinman3747
      @tinman3747 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Damn Andy didn't think I'd see you here

    • @ernstthalmann4306
      @ernstthalmann4306 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      An example of English morphing for the better.

    • @svengangert2683
      @svengangert2683 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      You taught me how to blender. Thank you.

    • @GLITZandGLOOM
      @GLITZandGLOOM 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I died at that 😂😂😂

    • @Terence.McKenna
      @Terence.McKenna 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      The greatest adverb

  • @bobvel7760
    @bobvel7760 3 ปีที่แล้ว +14033

    I feel like Steven farts a lot on set and the crew just has to deal with it.

    • @ultrashortbus
      @ultrashortbus 3 ปีที่แล้ว +647

      "It's like I always say, we have to blow it and we have to blow it now"
      ~ Steven Seagal [On Deadly Ground, 1994]

    • @JimKuback2009
      @JimKuback2009 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1044

      He did shit his pants once after claiming his aikido training made him impervious to being choked unconscious. Somebody called his bluff and Segal let him try. Dude choked Segal out and Segal shit in his pants.

    • @skelldoom4329
      @skelldoom4329 3 ปีที่แล้ว +510

      Oh, thats a power fart. Thats how he asserts his dominance over the entire cast and crew.

    • @dinglegonzo
      @dinglegonzo 3 ปีที่แล้ว +204

      Sounds reasonable to assume that he farts on set.

    • @TheAceSpaceman
      @TheAceSpaceman 3 ปีที่แล้ว +351

      I think he's more the guy who shits with the door open and he even likes to talk while taking a shit...and he doesn't shit silent or normal, he might push and moan like a lot. But hey...he's the big star of the film.

  • @rebeccageorgesisto8965
    @rebeccageorgesisto8965 ปีที่แล้ว +18

    Oh my god…that discussion was one of the funniest things I’ve heard in a while. I was DYING

  • @sumpterino
    @sumpterino ปีที่แล้ว +17

    7:34 I love that line so god damn much, "You see him sneaking into some building, fattily going around corners" 🤣

  • @deathknigt3000
    @deathknigt3000 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1618

    Seagal really looked at a 6 year old and went “wus hapnen?” like she’s an old friend of his.

    • @dotson9118
      @dotson9118 3 ปีที่แล้ว +124

      Alpha move

    • @tommygunmitvierm724
      @tommygunmitvierm724 3 ปีที่แล้ว +167

      He was just geniunely confused about what was going on. His age is taking a toll on him.

    • @breadwilson9865
      @breadwilson9865 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      I thought the same thing.

    • @frecklenuckle4450
      @frecklenuckle4450 3 ปีที่แล้ว +28

      highkey autistic as fuck

    • @mrniceguy7168
      @mrniceguy7168 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      I immediately had to pause and go to the comments section to see if anyone noticed that.
      That’s how I say hello to black guys at work

  • @jennyanydots2389
    @jennyanydots2389 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5272

    Seagal is very successful at being unintentionally hilarious. Imagine if he had even the slightest amount of self awareness, he'd be making a fortune as an action-comedy star.

    • @WorldWidePatriots
      @WorldWidePatriots 3 ปีที่แล้ว +151

      Glad I came back to see this comment.
      Do you think it would still be funny?or lose the magic of he knew and did it on purpose.

    • @jennyanydots2389
      @jennyanydots2389 3 ปีที่แล้ว +220

      @@WorldWidePatriots Yes, I think it would still be funny if he became self aware and did it on purpose. It's not simply mocking himself that makes it amusing, it's mocking the fake tough guy persona and over the top absurd action movie genre that's amusing. Movies like the expendables still do just fine even though the actors and writers are aware of the self parody. By not being self aware he comes off as straight pathetic. Still funny, but, in a sad way that most emotionally healthy people tend to ignore, hence the lack of financial success and tendency for more of a mean spirited mocking then a good natured ribbing.

    • @FOUL_TROUBLE
      @FOUL_TROUBLE 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      by Seagal do you mean Tom Myers?

    • @6slice712
      @6slice712 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      So very true 🤣 🤣

    • @swans184
      @swans184 3 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      JCVD has done exactly that

  • @SUBtrauma
    @SUBtrauma 15 วันที่ผ่านมา +4

    I've listened to this clip a thousand times and I still die laughing every time

  • @Blorxsnark
    @Blorxsnark หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    CIA, FBI, KFC…seagal is in all of them

  • @ColinFowler
    @ColinFowler 3 ปีที่แล้ว +543

    Neighbor: "This is my Sister"
    Seagal: "Whats hannenin"

    • @StewartLucrative
      @StewartLucrative 3 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      I read this comment before I saw that part of the video and it made it so much funnier.

    • @Binford-ei6ge
      @Binford-ei6ge 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      My future pick-up line for all eternity.

    • @phillipbailey70
      @phillipbailey70 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      100% honestly - I laughed at this comment for over 30 seconds, and every time I re-read it I start again (laughing as I type even) 😆😂🤣

  • @noaht5191
    @noaht5191 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2586

    Steven Seagal is just living life doing what he wants, doing what he loves-Being fat and pretending to be a badass.

    • @TheChuckFina
      @TheChuckFina 3 ปีที่แล้ว +302

      It's the american dream.
      (Wipes tear)

    • @blyxx7450
      @blyxx7450 3 ปีที่แล้ว +60

      Just like the rest of us lol

    • @noidontlikeu
      @noidontlikeu 3 ปีที่แล้ว +68

      @@TheChuckFina Russian, Serbian, and American dream

    • @arnaldogonzalez1678
      @arnaldogonzalez1678 3 ปีที่แล้ว +24

      The ideal lifestyle

    • @Zach_Wiberg
      @Zach_Wiberg 3 ปีที่แล้ว +48

      While also human trafficking and money laundering.

  • @strife9878
    @strife9878 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +8

    The boys made it to Joe Rogan , I’m gay

  • @terminal.man02
    @terminal.man02 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    3:08 old man impersonation is too funny 🤣

  • @T33K3SS3LCH3N
    @T33K3SS3LCH3N 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3031

    This part cannot be said often enough: They used a body double whenever he had to walk stairs. They never show his face and he's noticeably thinner in those shots.

    • @jorgvonameln7819
      @jorgvonameln7819 2 ปีที่แล้ว +148

      but the double has to wear a fat suit to look like old Stevie :)

    • @Brandon-bc1fz
      @Brandon-bc1fz 2 ปีที่แล้ว +74

      @@jorgvonameln7819 and has to walk slower to keep the same pace that Stevan would.

    • @maliant16
      @maliant16 2 ปีที่แล้ว +84

      Please say this is a joke.

    • @RenegadeShepard69
      @RenegadeShepard69 2 ปีที่แล้ว +61

      What, so he just never moves at any point in his life? Haha what a human sloth.

    • @DefendYoungstown
      @DefendYoungstown 2 ปีที่แล้ว +76

      "We need to send our *best* Special Forces guy, and he spends half the movie in a chair!"
      ... and the other half he apparently spends off set while the body double moves around a lot.

  • @PanasonicTooth
    @PanasonicTooth 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1815

    I like that Steven Seagal either has or will see this video, and he'll inevitably say the words "Cum Town" out loud at some point.

    • @AlbertoGonzalez..
      @AlbertoGonzalez.. 3 ปีที่แล้ว +37

      😂😂😂

    • @papayer
      @papayer 3 ปีที่แล้ว +120

      *inhale*
      cum townuhh *exhale*

    • @zaab-yaoh9302
      @zaab-yaoh9302 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Y’all play too much

    • @JonnyInfinite
      @JonnyInfinite 3 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      The title of his next film should be Cum on Town

    • @timcosgrove707
      @timcosgrove707 3 ปีที่แล้ว +43

      "Whozis Nick Mullen muhfugga?"

  • @hardcoreclassicenjoyer
    @hardcoreclassicenjoyer 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

    This is a roast for the ages. I come back to this from time to time out of pure joy.

  • @dslrjunkie
    @dslrjunkie ปีที่แล้ว +10

    if Steven Seagal was a nurse he would wake up patients to give them sleeping pills at 2AM.

  • @byteme9718
    @byteme9718 ปีที่แล้ว +2933

    Seagal is the most convincing actor ever. In every movie he plays Steven Seagal perfectly, even the same voices are the same. He's a genius.

    • @Sofus.
      @Sofus. ปีที่แล้ว +76

      Half of Steven Seagal's Film are dubded because he couldn't be bother to pronounce words properly.😂

    • @sigismund1617
      @sigismund1617 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      ​@@Sofus. Yeah what is that all about?
      There's that vampire film wherein he speaks maybe 2 minutes, the rest is bad, bad dubbing.

    • @elithetruth23
      @elithetruth23 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      😂😂😂

    • @elijahfreeman5299
      @elijahfreeman5299 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      His range is extraordinary....

    • @connorcamron1308
      @connorcamron1308 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      He’s been a trained thespian for 127 years

  • @grantvanosdel1747
    @grantvanosdel1747 ปีที่แล้ว +3302

    That female actress deserves an oscar for keeping a straight face during that scene asking “if he’s as good as they say he is”

    • @iainrickwood2623
      @iainrickwood2623 ปีที่แล้ว +160

      That 'female' actress; as opposed to those male actresses I guess

    • @TheReelDealFilmReviews
      @TheReelDealFilmReviews ปีที่แล้ว +178

      I think the woman in the sex scene deserves an Oscar 🤣

    • @qupation7296
      @qupation7296 ปีที่แล้ว +43

      @@iainrickwood2623 ey, listen. These days gender is a tricky topic. You COULD have a male actress. Don't ask me how please.

    • @yrudonking
      @yrudonking ปีที่แล้ว +73

      @@TheReelDealFilmReviews she deserves free therapy for life

    • @pedrovara4712
      @pedrovara4712 ปีที่แล้ว +22

      @@TheReelDealFilmReviews that woman deserves way more than that

  • @JSterling812
    @JSterling812 19 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

    i love how this sounds like something i'd hear on the radio on a long drive, i love it. i love these kinds of talk shows.

  • @decgar07
    @decgar07 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    The fact people keep funding his movies is amazing and I'm so thankful to them.

  • @Barbaroossa
    @Barbaroossa 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3181

    "he's just fatly going around the corner" - that's fucking brilliant, nearly shit myself laughing at this

    • @zk0rned
      @zk0rned 2 ปีที่แล้ว +68

      unlike Seagal that actually shit himself

    • @StarHarvestOfficial
      @StarHarvestOfficial 2 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      @@zk0rned *Adam

    • @zk0rned
      @zk0rned 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@StarHarvestOfficial Seagal*

    • @Zergrush66
      @Zergrush66 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      I died hahahahahah

    • @SubjectE57
      @SubjectE57 2 ปีที่แล้ว +33

      "fatly" is my new favourite adverb.

  • @Cracktaculus
    @Cracktaculus ปีที่แล้ว +3279

    Much respect for this man of men.
    Former Meal Team 6, Gravy Seals AND Green Buffet.

    • @ismay33l
      @ismay33l ปีที่แล้ว +22

      😂😂😂

    • @ieat10kittens94
      @ieat10kittens94 ปีที่แล้ว +139

      Ace in the chair force too

    • @LaithNight
      @LaithNight ปีที่แล้ว +42

      Overdosed on laughing by this one 😂

    • @Cracktaculus
      @Cracktaculus ปีที่แล้ว +35

      @@ieat10kittens94 Top Sirloin Gun

    • @northstarsixtysix
      @northstarsixtysix ปีที่แล้ว +5

      brilliant

  • @skelter1153
    @skelter1153 ปีที่แล้ว +30

    He's very silly but he's a world famous,
    self made Millionaire.
    The immeasurable LUCK he's had
    throughout his career can't be overstated.

    • @YouTubeIsNotGood
      @YouTubeIsNotGood ปีที่แล้ว

      You forgot to add Russian asset, because he wants his daddy Putin's approval

    • @Flood520
      @Flood520 29 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

      Some call it luck, some call it an entire lifetime of laundering money for the Russian Mafia.

  • @Notjay95
    @Notjay95 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    It’s amazing how many details these guys can remember and quote off the cuff

  • @jonathankozenko
    @jonathankozenko 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2207

    My favorite quote about him is “With every movie he makes, his gut gets bigger and his audience gets smaller.”

  • @KidCorporate
    @KidCorporate 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1754

    Fun fact: dude I shoot with was an armorer on a few of his direct-to-landfill films, he said Segal would stack two McDonalds chicken sandwiches one on top of another then eat them both at the same time.

    • @bradleyruest6863
      @bradleyruest6863 3 ปีที่แล้ว +161

      You’ve never stacked 2 McChickens and scarfed em down? Lol what a loser

    • @fazerfaze
      @fazerfaze 3 ปีที่แล้ว +43

      That's normal

    • @jthreefingers8445
      @jthreefingers8445 3 ปีที่แล้ว +96

      Heard Steven Seagal is going on a diet. One cow instead of 2.

    • @ThjyuGaming
      @ThjyuGaming 3 ปีที่แล้ว +49

      Bruh McChickens hit different

    • @jthreefingers8445
      @jthreefingers8445 3 ปีที่แล้ว +25

      @@ThjyuGaming And I'm sure it was just a snack.

  • @shm-62u30
    @shm-62u30 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    The dude who played the LT Colonel in sniper special ops is a legit vietnam veteran

    • @coolguy_42
      @coolguy_42 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      yeah and he was in Band of Brothers which was actually a good war show

  • @nyceplayz8051
    @nyceplayz8051 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    9:14 😂😂😂 he says to the little girl "wus hapnin'!?" 😂😂😂
    Oh, ow, my spleen 😂

  • @maat826
    @maat826 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2396

    He craps these movies out for the foreign market. Seagal is literally and figuratively huge in Asia. They love the “black cowboy” voice

    • @stproducciones9140
      @stproducciones9140 4 ปีที่แล้ว +550

      he's the last bastion for the classic american action heroes the world fell in love with. ain't that sad? foreigners want Arnold but all they get is Seagal

    • @chvishal
      @chvishal 4 ปีที่แล้ว +46

      maybe 20 years ago

    • @EliasPoint
      @EliasPoint 4 ปีที่แล้ว +240

      Super popular with older Filipino men here

    • @lkcdarzadix6216
      @lkcdarzadix6216 4 ปีที่แล้ว +52

      @@EliasPoint true with older Filipino but the young or that saw his peak in 90s can't stand him

    • @keithklassen5320
      @keithklassen5320 4 ปีที่แล้ว +58

      If you watch any animated Ghost In The Shell, the character Batou is based on him.

  • @Epoch11
    @Epoch11 3 ปีที่แล้ว +720

    "fatly" that is the perfect word to describe anything that Steven seagal does

    • @4midable4ce
      @4midable4ce 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      😆😆7:35. That shit gave me the giggles.

    • @seltzer30
      @seltzer30 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      fatly fart noise at 52s

  • @rog9317
    @rog9317 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +21

    I was linked to this video from Reddit. This made me laugh harder than a good stand-up comedian. I was crying! This video is so good! Keep up the nice and funny work!

    • @user-dg1jq5rd2c
      @user-dg1jq5rd2c 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Lmao same! The question was who was the most pathetic washed up actor. This has me deceased. Best thing I’ve seen all day.

    • @wade6282
      @wade6282 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

      That's because they are good stand up comedians.

  • @uome20bukz
    @uome20bukz 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3072

    I swear I saw a scene somewhere not long ago from one of his recent movies where his character walks up some stairs, only it was an obvious stunt double. Literally used a stunt double to walk up some stairs.

    • @DavidLoveOfficial
      @DavidLoveOfficial 2 ปีที่แล้ว +74

      🤣🤣🤣

    • @eli3197
      @eli3197 2 ปีที่แล้ว +28

      Do you know the name of the movie?

    • @Odinsday
      @Odinsday 2 ปีที่แล้ว +173

      Seagal is on the verge of having a heart attack every time he stands up. No wonder he has his stunt doubles do the walking for him.

    • @Yoda-em5mt
      @Yoda-em5mt 2 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      No that was when he was young and fat he climbed a stair thats one stair then sat down .

    • @uome20bukz
      @uome20bukz 2 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      @@Yoda-em5mt idk what you’re talking about but, no. Whatever you said is absolutely not what I’m talking about.

  • @HighLordBlazeReborn
    @HighLordBlazeReborn 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3717

    The more I hear about this guy, the more I'm convinced his entire career now is to be a front for money laundering.

    • @thomasp2516
      @thomasp2516 2 ปีที่แล้ว +393

      He has shady dealings with Balkan countries. He is friends with Vladimir Putin and obtained the Serbian nationality in 2016. When I visited Montenegro I remember him being at the opening of a luxury resort. He's a sellout.

    • @brovid-19
      @brovid-19 2 ปีที่แล้ว +91

      I am 1000% sure you can't prove that isn't the case

    • @niceserb84
      @niceserb84 2 ปีที่แล้ว +28

      @@thomasp2516 Yea he Is Mongolian ...

    • @lilfairycupcake
      @lilfairycupcake 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      To stupid 2 be a front for anything.

    • @ezzar8165
      @ezzar8165 2 ปีที่แล้ว +96

      Absolutely!! 😂😂😂
      There’s just something about him that REEKS of shadiness on so many levels.

  • @daxxx9366
    @daxxx9366 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    I wonder how many times I’ve watched this video.

  • @ThunderDomeBoxingTalk
    @ThunderDomeBoxingTalk 18 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

    “I love my sister. Her puzzy isnt ruined” 😂😂 omg I’m dying over here

  • @jasoncampbell1507
    @jasoncampbell1507 ปีที่แล้ว +2135

    'He's fully clothed and she's naked, he's still wearing sunglasses.' I had to grab a glass of water because I choked a little on my own laughing tears just now.

    • @Joecbg100
      @Joecbg100 ปีที่แล้ว +36

      That's very Neil Breen of him

    • @lookronjon
      @lookronjon ปีที่แล้ว +9

      He only wants to do himself.

    • @goodallbeckman944
      @goodallbeckman944 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      I was watching at the bus stop and I legit dropped on my knees. Good shit

    • @davidpowell6098
      @davidpowell6098 ปีที่แล้ว

      Easy ride, though, smack his arse, and ride the ripples. Job done.

    • @hansonjames3792
      @hansonjames3792 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@Joecbg100😊😅

  • @retron99
    @retron99 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3029

    2:59 Believe it or not, That old man is actually more badass than Seagal ever could be. His name is Dale Dye, who is a legit U.S Marine veteran, fought in the Vietnam War and served as a captain, awarded the bronze star medal and 3 purple hearts, and founded Warriors Inc., an organization that helps actors portray soldiers in war movies more accurately.

    • @Boomerangi13
      @Boomerangi13 2 ปีที่แล้ว +312

      Oh damn, never knew this. I knew he looked familiar, he played Col. Sink in Band of Brothers! Brilliant series and casting on that one.

    • @TylerWardhaha
      @TylerWardhaha 2 ปีที่แล้ว +259

      Well. He failed in that movie. 😬

    • @MassEffectFan113
      @MassEffectFan113 2 ปีที่แล้ว +68

      Yup, Dale has done more for people than Cum Town ever has, lol.

    • @MassEffectFan113
      @MassEffectFan113 2 ปีที่แล้ว +101

      @@Boomerangi13 Yeah he's done a handful of war films. He was also in Saving Private Ryan.

    • @nathanlight2818
      @nathanlight2818 2 ปีที่แล้ว +66

      He was in "Platoon" too

  • @Gabagool93
    @Gabagool93 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    I come back to this just about every month.

  • @StickyBud9395
    @StickyBud9395 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    I had never seen a Steven Seagal movie before , after watching these unintentionally funny movies , I'm hooked and I'm going to search for his movies , these are better than most real comedies .

    • @jesuschristiscallingyou953
      @jesuschristiscallingyou953 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Thing is he can act decently, but the always cheesy dialog and plots ruins his movies. I have to say, though, that the color grading in his movies is always good.

    • @einundsiebenziger5488
      @einundsiebenziger5488 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Your punctuation is the equivalent of the editing in S.S. movies.

    • @StickyBud9395
      @StickyBud9395 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@einundsiebenziger5488 I'm not sure if you're aiming your remarks at me , if you're I don't really care what you say , I've have more important problems in my life , if your remarks aren't directed at me , then I need not have bothered replying , either way may I wish you peace , I'm a nice person sometimes .

  • @maximumcutsandreps5833
    @maximumcutsandreps5833 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1271

    He talks like RDJ in tropic thunder.

    • @youwebz
      @youwebz 2 ปีที่แล้ว +43

      SURVIVE!

    • @brandonbueno6623
      @brandonbueno6623 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Looks like him too without the fro

    • @michaelalfandary1643
      @michaelalfandary1643 2 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      I believe he went full black like Ben Stiller went full tard

    • @MrRoss-jz7fx
      @MrRoss-jz7fx 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Yes but RDJ was GREAT!

    • @Opi_812
      @Opi_812 2 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      For 300 years... That word has kept us down...

  • @addictionhypnotherapist1241
    @addictionhypnotherapist1241 2 ปีที่แล้ว +900

    Woman: “And this is my sister”
    Steven to 5yo child: “whazz hapnin”
    😂😂😂

    • @br0mouzone
      @br0mouzone 2 ปีที่แล้ว +61

      I died when I heard that

    • @Deadassbruhfrfr
      @Deadassbruhfrfr 2 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      Bro, I was in sitiches

    • @Pr3st0ne
      @Pr3st0ne 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      He sounds more like a Tom Segura impression of himself than he sounds like Steven Seagal lmao

    • @gregorteply9034
      @gregorteply9034 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      So awkward.

  • @smon4164
    @smon4164 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    "That's the good man" gets me every time 🤣

  • @thatwierdbilly
    @thatwierdbilly 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    just look at how he holds his gun

  • @KG-th3cr
    @KG-th3cr 2 ปีที่แล้ว +882

    "Are you really as good as they all say you are?"
    -"Erreywonceanywhile"

    • @heroblok6
      @heroblok6 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 HOLLLERIIIINNNN !!!!!!

    • @activeone
      @activeone 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      💀💀💀

    • @777jones
      @777jones 2 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      “Murph murph.” Belch

    • @mjxw
      @mjxw 2 ปีที่แล้ว +40

      I feel so bad for that actress. Imagine spending your life at your craft, probably dreaming of acting in movies, working your way up through regional theatre, finally getting a break to appear in a movie with a decent budget... and you have to deliver a line like that. Just brutal.

    • @KG-th3cr
      @KG-th3cr 2 ปีที่แล้ว +25

      @@mjxw Hey I'm sure she used the 50 bucks she got for the role for something useful.

  • @guyofminimalimportance7
    @guyofminimalimportance7 4 ปีที่แล้ว +557

    Modern Steven Seagal movies are effectively trying to convince you that a man who's probably older, in worse health, and honestly less attractive than your own father is a badass.

    • @spitalhelles3380
      @spitalhelles3380 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      not effective

    • @Walks-With-Fists
      @Walks-With-Fists 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      critically effective! 😂

    • @ferise1
      @ferise1 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Guy of Minimal Importance reminds me of Tom Segura’s bit.

    • @Hubert_Cumberdale_
      @Hubert_Cumberdale_ 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      He is older, in worse health and less attractive than my father and my dad is a fucking alcoholic.

  • @Aidanshaves99
    @Aidanshaves99 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    This made me laugh so damn hard. I can’t thank you enough

  • @JC-oq5ex
    @JC-oq5ex ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I like how Nick called that guys facial hair shitty and then proceeded to copy it