Titanic
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 28 ก.ย. 2024
- Audio is from:
Episode 33 ‘Ugh Wardell’ (12-29-2016), with guest Brandon Wardell
Premium episode Mad About You (5-7-2018)
Episode 144 My Girl (2-28-2019)
Premium episode Trains Can’t Stop Me (5-21-2018)
Episode 59 Marmaduke (7-6-2017)
Episode 199 Lockdown Raw (3-19-2020)
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“Not Indian but like one of those Indian countries”
“This Australian businessman...”
Where's the lie?
@@R0NYFL0NY We're English Southerners not pajeets.
It's just a matter of time before we're all Indian
@@andrewrodden3725 No shit. They reproduce more quickly than the rest of us.
India and Australia were once tectonically connected so it makes sense?
I love how when stav hears “Portugal in the 1600s” he pictures cavemen living in mud huts
I'm actually from Lisbon and laughed so much.. Also the earthquake was in 1755 XD
That was cool how they showed AC. I remember that city breaking but didn’t know it was Lisbon or even real…
@@bigounce4293 That game was mad underrated, loved that mission
Breaking news: Former European empire that hasn't been politically or culturally relevant for 250 years insulted by borderline retarded man whose ancestral homeland hasn't been politically or culturally relevant for 2,500 years
@@bigounce4293 Big ounce the prairie dog?
titanic is about a 90 year old woman who on her deathbed instead of remembering her husband or her kids of the last 70 years...... remembers some homless dude who porked her for a couple days on a cruise liner when she was 20 years old
holy shit
Disgusting. And amazing.
Sir there's a huge bitch, about 15 clicks out of here
Further demonstrating that Rose is just all-around a shitty person
And you will do the same
Yeah we All made that joke 20 Years ago when it 1st came out. Pretty sure Every talk show host made that joke. Also that famous viral meme of some1 going into that plotline IN DEPTH of how rose is a Grabage person. Sooo you're Double joke stealing and posting it on a Cumtown Clip channel? WOWW YOURE THE FUCKING MAN.
@@PickassoEnt OMG! YOUR SO MUCH MORE EDGY AND ON FIRE!
Billy Zane being the good guy of the Titanic is the most sensational take I’ve ever heard.
He hooks his wife up with lavish jewelry and wines and dines her and she literally cheats on him with some poor Irish immigrant, he is the true victim here.
@@yakivpopavich The lesson is don't be secretly bald.
Everything would’ve been okay in the end if Kate Winslet listened to her mom and just went with Billy Zane. Can’t believe she was such a harlot to reject him and her mother.
@@JoesMusicandMemes”Just go with the guy that slapped the shit out of you” get out of the basement Joe 💀💀🤣 I hope this was a joke which in that case, nvm. If not then 💀💀💀💀
@@hmorton490if women want the vote they have to accept a few slaps too.
"This is 1914, so anything less than holding a fucking branding iron to a woman's face, he's not beating her" I loled
It's 1912 as well lmao. Everyone knows the date the Titanic sunk
That's burning not beating
@@simon_96 The word was abuse originally.
@@halflifeepisode34980”everyone knows the date the Titanic sunk” 🤓
@@halflifeepisode34980 no, no one cares enough to remember that lmao
Its not a important historical event
America in 100 years:
“Let’s make the twin towers 2”
You liked the freedom tower so much we built another
@@Adamsnadler214 Apparently we're building 3 more actually. I just don't know when they're being completed
It was less than 100
Go all in and make the Quad Towers
@@mg6945 Apparently the freedom tower was so ridiculously expensive that Port Authority can't afford to keep tunnels and bridges in good condition and pay tolls have skyrocketed as a result. So why the fuck are 3 more being built???
"I inherited my father's $27 fortune".
LMFAO
0:40 “some Indian country” *the whitest guy in Australia pops up*
@KingT_ 02 why?
@KingT_ 02 damn dude that's pretty gay
@KingT_ 02 he's also said he will only pay the workers the money he owes them if they agree to not say anything bad about him or working for him.
He also has his own shitty right wing political party called Clive Palmers United Australia
@KingT_ 02 what ever happened with that lawsuit anyway? I know he tried for defamation but no idea how it went
@KingT_ 02 China still sucks tho. So hes at least right about that.
“A real man makes his own luck." - Billy Zane the hero in Titanic.
Didn't he blow his brains out after the stock market crashed?
@@notinspectorgadget what a King, fucken losers that ate stale bread out of the trash - hell no, I'm gonna blow my brains out b/c chad...... I'm gay
My grandpa used to say that. It's true.
I mean, yeah.
I can't believe 5 people ignored Stav's immortal advice about this.
"It must have been so fucking gay to die on the Titanic, dude."
"she wants to pander to the working class until she has to share a door or whatever." good point.
THE WEIGHT OF THEIR TWO BODIES WOULD HAVE SUNK THE DOOR ITS NOT ABOUT LATERAL SPACE.
Dillon there have been several proofs that your claim is not true.
@@hermask815 except it absolutely is true. Even if the door wasnt completely sunk the weight of their two bodies would submerge them in the water enough to make it useless.
@@dillon5155 i see what youre sayin yeah. They both woulda fit on the door but if they were both on it theyd be a little submerged in the water. Enough that theyd both freeze faster and die
Anybody wants to know, myth busters did an episode on the titanic door.
Leo is for boys... Billy Zane is for MEN.
Theres a party in your mouth.
If i remember correctly his character does die by suicide, so statistically...
4:36 "Doesn't he beat Rose?"
"No! Never!" (*smack) "Not once!"
🤣
According to our recently passed King, Sir Connery, it's not a beating if the hand is open.
Billy Zanes hand looked pretty open.
A slap is not a beating.
Never once. It's not not once. I know it's a small thing but the never once makes it hillarious
@@bobm9485 I know. Lol. I thought is looked redundant as I was typing it even though "Never once" was the actual quote.
Oh my fuckin god, the lisbon part in assassins creed is like if they put 9/11 into the game and you had to escape the tower lmao
I mean, we already have Die Hard In A School Shooting, give it a few more years...
I'd play that
Remember that late 2000s romantic movie that was just a run of the mill melodrama, but at the end there was a reveal that the guy worked at the WTC and there was a zoom out of him looking through the window in the early morning of 9/11. And that comes out of the blue, no foreshadowing, nothing.
That was hilarious, it feels like a Nick punchline but Hollywood actually did it. It was a Rob Pattinson movie, fuck me if I will remember the name, but it’s very funny.
"Bunch of shitty huts"
@@DesolatedChild018Remember Me
“You should listen to your friend Billy Zane, he’s a cool dude”
Put a cork in it, Zane.
"What is this...a center for ants?!"
Merman!
"You think you're too cool for school, but I got a newsflash for you Walter Chronkite.................you aren't 💋. "
Nick : "No, he doesn't, he never beats Rose."
Billy Zane: " What do the five fingers say to the face?"
*SLAAAP!!!*
I'm Sir Richard James, Charleton!
Get my wife's name out your fucking mouth?
I can't believe Nick didn't say anything about the fact that Adam of all people brought up the sinking of the Lusitania
Another classic tidbit of high school history from Adam
which had about 400 less casualties than the titanic....
Lusitania eh? I know about another ship that sunk much more recently, the USS Freedom or something like that. Ever heard about that one?
surprised he didn't mention the USS Liberty
He doesn’t know enough about history to make that connection
“The poor guy gets to fuck the rich woman” is such a concise description of the entire movie
I'm fresh out of a breakup, like 36 hours fresh, and I'm heartbroken. I thought I'd never smile or laugh again, but the Kathy
Bates morse code made me laugh so goddamn hard and I feel a little better now. I fucking love Cum Town. Thanks ClangersTV, preesh.
How you going man?
Sorry to hear that brother. Hope you feel better.
I'm a bit late but hope you're doing better my guy
Hey man, checkin in, how you doin? I got kicked out last week and I'm homeless now couch surfin so I hope you've absorbed my good karma or some shit idk how it works I'm gay, but yeah how you been?
@@peddlersclan hey fellow gay not to make it about me but I was in the same boat After being kicked out. Just started getting my shit together man if that helps. As cliche as it sounds so keep going.
Lol, rebuilding the Titanic.
There’s tempting fate and then there’s flat out spitting in God’s eye.
Titanic is absolutely hilarious. The Role Billy Zane plays is one of the funniest roles of all time.
A real man makes his own luck." - Billy Zane “Titanic."
Legend
Titanic sounds like the FYRE of 100 years ago
lol I was just thinking that, myself~
At least they had good accommodations
Let's recreate FYRE
whats the cast of the FYRE movie gonna look like
@@grandpathong Seth MacFarlane as Billy McFarland.
I always laugh when Nick talked about his ($600? $700? Something like that) Gran Turismo wheel, which will quickly become a Gran Torino wheel once he starts losing.
It's a Gran Autismo wheel
@@lenonel3286 Grand Autismo
"Should I Get a wig, new teeth, liposuction" yes Stav you should get all of those.
and then he should play The Phantom
"is that Billy Zane"
a little Titanic fact of my own from Wikipedia list of movie accidents: 'On the final night of shooting in Nova Scotia, 80 cast and crew members were hospitalized after pranksters spiked the clam chowder at the catering area with PCP'
Australia and Chinese... so just Chinese then.
Ouch.
4:46 lol fantastic editing
Holy shit that slap has me dying. Your edits make this hilarious show even funnier. Bless you
Never
*smack*
Never once.
Whoever makes these clips really make the bits even funnier than the podcast. Excellent work.
I literally came across this comment just as he slapped her🤣
The editing on this with Bates was just too damn good.
Kathy Bates' character made all her money being the world's first Roseanne
toothless' laugh is so irritating but i can't live without it
i'm glad it sank - Adam
Kate winslets plump body was 🔥
"Dying on the Titanic must have been gay"
- Stavros
I heard Seth McFarlanes grandpa had a ticket to go on the Titanic but missed it because he slept in.
Why do I get the feeling that Adam's "friends' were behind this tragedy somehow.
IceBERG
Still haven't found a tragedy they aren't behind.
"we have to make another titanic" - indian guy
Clive Palmer is basically Australian Donald Trump
He was legally re-elected president in 2020, too?
@@connormcclenny9681 No?
Clive Palmer is a total bogan shill and crook. Couldn't win an election seat no matter how much money he threw at it. Put heaps of people out of work through his failed nickel refinery and denied compensation. Total crook scumbag!
The Cathy Bates/morse code had me doing that high-pitched laugh that blokes aren't supposed to do in public. Very well done boys
For someone who hates the Titanic he sure remembers a lot of the scenes pretty vividly.
As much as I love TAFS. I wish OceanGate happened during CT’s run
Gonna sound stupid but I forgot just how long Titanic really is. Like you forget how much time there is to fill with a 3 hour narrative. Was rewatching it about a year or two ago and that whole opening frame narrative with Bill Paxton and the crew goes on for about 20-25 minutes I swear. Like most films thirty minutes in, you’re through the first act and all the exposition. Titanic? You’re just about to meet the actual main characters, and they aren’t even on board yet
Hearing Mullen refer to my country as “one of those Indian countries” straight off the bat had me fuckin rolling 😂
Sam mckenzie
Do you work in tech support?
8:52 I’m fucking dead💀💀 perfect visuals
Non stop brilliance from this channel. I commend your work. It would be amazing if you did a video for every time they bring up the movie Blank Check, bc they do it a lot seemingly without realizing it and it’s always hilarious.
Haha I actually have a couple of the times when they referenced Blank Check written down. Not sure if it’s enough for a video but, maybe
Kathy Bates flopping her arm along with the Morse code was a great edit.
"Listen to your friend Billy Zane... he's a cool dude. He's trying to help you out."
Kate Winslet was so beautiful in this movie
Stav, The Billy Zane of Comedians...
"He doesn't beat Rose, never!"
SLAP
"Never once"
“God himself could not sink this ship!”
God: “And I took that personally.”
I love how the video editing shows everything they are talking about perfectly.
Here because of the Titan submarine loss to relive this tragedy
Who’s here after the submarine accident?
The fact that they go back and forth about which Indian country it’s from and then they show a Chinese woman is the funniest shit ever.
Lost it at Stav in a wig LMAO
Funniest part of that movie is after old lady died and she went to afterlife to meet Jack… i visualize the poor dude she was married to for 50 years watching her walk past him for some dude she banged one weekend, everyone applauding around him. 😂
As an Australian, the existence of Clive Palmer hurts me.
He recently tried to sue a TH-camr for calling him a fatty as a fear tactic to get the video removed.
And that same youtuber just made the deputy premier of NSW resign lmao
I'm actually wondering how hard it could be to have a staged titanic disaster. Sort of a living museum where you can see the tragedy unfold in real time. Tow a faux iceberg made out of foam in the middle of the ocean. Have some sections of the ship be submerged. Have some asshole with a wad of cash cut in line in front of you for the life boats. The full experience.
there was a rick and morty episode about this. they even let you down into the cargo space to fuck in the back of a classic limousine.
@@FistfulOfGabagool Damn I should probably watch that show, then. Right up my alley.
To be fair, while a whole lot of poor people died, one of the richest men on the planet at the time, John Jacob Astor IV, also died. So in the end it all balanced out economically.
He was killed because he was one if the few in opposition to the Federal reserve. Thats why it was sunk
@@woahblackbettybamalam Lol no
@@janberkemeier7406 Lol yeah. If you arent dumb that is
Billy Zane’s eyebrows 🤣
Isn’t this the same Aussie-Chinese collab company that remade the Flight 93 Plane? They do good work.
I know (despite what some people believe) Chinese actually make really high quality boats with amazing detail that last, so I hope it’s them.
After hearing that chinese guy say "Titanic 2" i decided to postpone my suicide, there are things still worth living for.
“Id pop one in and then pop one off”
-Every single boy who saw the movie
I remember watching a video about a North Korean defector and she said that the was shocked when she discovered that Leonardo De Caprio was not, in fact dead and that he was an actor (because she had seen Titanic so many times and believed it was real)
The fact that North Korea allows their citizens to learn about The Titanic is weird to me.
@Person I think the idea is to show that what the Americans call "The Unsinkable Ship" sinks by hitting an iceberg which is meant to imply that your average American ship gets sunk by a small rock
@@Leon-zu1wp I don't see why they wouldn't. Big mean western ship gets yeeted by patriotic ice mountain.
@@Leon-zu1wp the film is total dog shit and a symbol of western imperial power is destroyed by cultural hubris. What’s not to rike?
God damn this channel is addictive
I got douche chills when James Cameron said he was King of the World
The editing is on fucking point. Great job!
Nick - “Never, not once”
Cal Hockley - “Aight bet”
The Titanic wanted a rematch before all of the glaciers and icebergs melted.
"Never... 4:50... never once..."
That assassins creed edit was god tier
Titanic is a masterpiece.
I stand by this statemtent.
It's cool how they covered up the structural weakness that caused Titanic to sink because that also contributed to the sinking of her sister ship, Britannic.
you do the funniest videos for their audio clips dude. im dying watching the fat one being put in the titanic scenes
8:45 I’m DEAD
He lived, but he would blow his own brains out about 20 years later during the Stock Market crash.
4:55 made me burst out laughing.
The Indian Titanic 2 is not going to be an ocean going liner, but a stationary floating hotel. I think. Clive Palmer's replica will probably never be built.
“I’m a different style of hot guy.” How can you not love Stav?
The violin guys' last song was actually the outro music
The editing was top notch made it twice as funny
lmao “we have to make another titanic” 👳🏾♂️voice 😂
most underrated part of this edit might be the shots of people suffering horribly while nick is going "who CARES"
Great Stav quote 9:36
how you add video to the commentary makes this 1000% better and so funny.
Hell yeah ClangersTV pulling through with the best content as always
The realization that there a fan crossover between the microphones and cumtown is really fucking w me
Titanic was half a 9/11 -Louis CK
NEW CLANGERS ON MY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!
Happy Birthday!
There was a good handful of bad decisions that were made leading to the sinking of titanic. But, most were made by the Captain. Which was why he went down with the ship. Not because he was noble but because he would have been blamed and charged for it probably anyways. The night it sank he decided to get wasted, had the ship speeding in known iceberg territory just to attempt to show off by arriving a day early, and went to bed before the ship even struck an iceberg. And after they investigated his record they found out he wasn't even qualified to be the captain of a ship that caliber. (It was probably easy to lie on your resume in the 1930's lol.)Plus the binoculars were under lock and key they also later discovered. Meaning if they were actually being used they would have had time to avoid the iceberg. The ship had also caught fire before it sailed. They fixed it cosmetically but it's a theory it made the ship weaker than it actually should have been in that area. Most of these mistakes were made because they believed in their own hype of an "unsinkable" ship.
The Lisbon earthquake actually killed like 30,000 people lol
“Worst part of watching titanic, is finishing it in post nut clarity”
- me
editing is on fucking point
Lol @ cameron at the end. Didnt know he accepted the award like that.
5:50 I always get that actor confused with imhotep from the mummy movies
If you guys like boat related bad times, the Halifax harbour explosion is pretty interesting
i just don't watch movies any more. I let you guys talk me through it...its amazing.
9:20 if you turn the volume right up in this scene you can hear the old man whisper "anal?" in his wife's ear 💔
"never once..." lmao the editing!!!