One simple trick to reclaim your power | Kasia Urbaniak | TEDxRosario

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 28 เม.ย. 2020
  • Throughout centuries, women have been trained to give up their power. With a simple communicational hack, they can reclaim their power when facing gender inequality, no matter the stakes. But the question is, why do women freeze in the first place? In this provocative and insightful talk, Kasia Urbaniak explores the effects of cultural conditioning and the difference between power and gender dynamics, while teaching us to change the way we have conversations as a society, so both women and men can reach their full potential as human beings.
    Kasia Urbaniak spent 17 years studying to become a Taoist nun. To foot the bill for her studies, she worked as a high-paid (and extremely successful) dominatrix in dungeons around New York City. What she learned in these two wildly different settings has turned into her life’s work, teaching women about power dynamics and influence to become better leaders. Her mission: to redefine what it means to be a good girl.
    This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at www.ted.com/tedx

ความคิดเห็น • 131

  • @priagrace724
    @priagrace724 2 ปีที่แล้ว +72

    This might be the best thing I've ever seen on the internet.

  • @jimwinter-card.114
    @jimwinter-card.114 3 ปีที่แล้ว +64

    My wife discovered Kasia, I have become obsessed. She is so brilliant and exactly on point! I am a HUGE fan and learning from her so much!!

  • @sudheshkumaran6608
    @sudheshkumaran6608 3 ปีที่แล้ว +54

    What an amazing message. This must be one of the most powerful message that must be delivered to our kids in school so that our community evolves overtime.

  • @robinreinach8457
    @robinreinach8457 4 ปีที่แล้ว +52

    Kasia Urbaniak explains why women sometimes feel tongue tied at the exact moment when we most want to speak. And Kasia offers a practical solution that is immediately usable by women in the real world. Kasia's delivery is exemplary and her attitude is generous, tender, and brilliant.

  • @FYPNLP
    @FYPNLP 3 ปีที่แล้ว +38

    I've taken Kasia's verbal course which is the ted talk in minute granular detail and I can attest it really does work. Just as you have to exercise to get the body you want for your physical health you have to be consistent in learning how to turn the spotlight. This coupled with NLP linguistics will allow you to break the freeze and own a conversation and not let the power dynamic 'own you'.

    • @roxannerodriguez7075
      @roxannerodriguez7075 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Thank you. I'll be looking into both! 😊

    • @FYPNLP
      @FYPNLP ปีที่แล้ว

      @@roxannerodriguez7075 The course is called the verbal dojo

  • @raebarto3424
    @raebarto3424 2 ปีที่แล้ว +18

    This concept has been a game changer for me. I’ve started practicing “questioning back” and the power I feel within myself is amazing. I’m about to read Kasia’s book because I want more.

  • @metabolicmarybeth
    @metabolicmarybeth 4 ปีที่แล้ว +49

    Brilliant. Impactful. Actionable.
    Thank you Kasia for being a bright light in the dark for many women.

  • @ShootTheMoonStudio
    @ShootTheMoonStudio 4 ปีที่แล้ว +38

    This is pure, piercing, unadulterated genius. Ya just know it when you hear it. So rare.

    • @user-yg5cd6kp8n
      @user-yg5cd6kp8n 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      ق!@$!!!××××-°°°``•☆○▪°`°•`○~```` قذفبثقبثثثتلقائيبسسسءسسس٢٢٣بيضوذشقبثثثفف٤ق٣لقشق٣

  • @LizLaManche1
    @LizLaManche1 4 ปีที่แล้ว +31

    A simple yet revolutionary concept of the dynamics at work in communication and personal power. Inspiring, with a real-world practice you can use right away.

  • @stephaniebryant8616
    @stephaniebryant8616 4 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    I am deeply moved by this woman and her work. This simple tool is a profound strategy to interrupt learned behavior in a way that brings us closer to what we want from ourselves and each other. So very powerful!

  • @kaiawang9593
    @kaiawang9593 2 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    One of the most powerful TED Talks I've ever watched! So true and empowering for women.

    • @tahnyaiva4494
      @tahnyaiva4494 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Agreed!!!

    • @theresad7072
      @theresad7072 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Also empowering for men by illustrating how what we call toxic masculinity can be very self-destructive, counterproductive & impotent.
      Business author Jim Collins suggested the most effective business leaders ("Level 5" leaders) have a high questions - to - statements ratios in their communications.

  • @Mahrukh1997
    @Mahrukh1997 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    This is wonderful. It got me thinking about experiences in my own personal life. I can definitely relate to the freeze as a woman. It's time we realized dominance and gender dynamics are two completely different things!

  • @jarodandbrandiokano2348
    @jarodandbrandiokano2348 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    I took your advice about asking a question with a question and it totally worked. Not only did it stop the person but I also got an apology for them asking the question. It did make me feel so inpowered.

    • @theresad7072
      @theresad7072 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Answering a question with another question is something Jesus did often and it forever changed the 🌎 world.

    • @roxannerodriguez7075
      @roxannerodriguez7075 ปีที่แล้ว

      ​@@theresad7072 very true!

  • @pnartugaykaraca5862
    @pnartugaykaraca5862 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    This truly nails it! Thank you for the fantastic analysis of the state of things as they are and ways to handle them differently. I am absolutely going to try this for myself and share it.

  • @rubymaubert3605
    @rubymaubert3605 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Wow!!!! Simply wow. Easy, straight forward, truly genius. Brillaint

  • @FreyaGem
    @FreyaGem 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    Wow. This was exceptional...had to watch it two times in a row!

  • @fitfizz
    @fitfizz 4 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    Yes! Yes! Yes! Pure empowerment! So much admiration for Kasia.

  • @MonifaHarris
    @MonifaHarris 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I've read her book many times and I still am floored by the simple brilliance of her work. I'm still working on the not easy part

  • @karenwest4925
    @karenwest4925 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Absolutely needed to watch this. Brilliant thank you!

  • @frusia123
    @frusia123 3 ปีที่แล้ว +26

    She's the goddess we have been waiting for 🙂💙

    • @zoedearborn2542
      @zoedearborn2542 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      You are the goddess you’ve been waiting for.

  • @sydneymav
    @sydneymav ปีที่แล้ว +2

    hate how we treat women as less. when they just might be better than men. maybe neither is better but both deserve RESPECT

  • @gigimoss
    @gigimoss 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I just got Kasia's book and I'm so excited!!!

  • @roopa123451
    @roopa123451 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    Fascinating.....you can see the truth of what she says if you watch yourself

  • @mixedupbd9435
    @mixedupbd9435 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    Wow impressive , actionable, motivated

  • @giselamoda
    @giselamoda 4 ปีที่แล้ว +44

    I want you to think about the dominant and submissive states of attention like your right hand and your left hand. You need both of them, you need to know how to use them and use them well. Up until now we’ve been asking men to cut off one hand and women to cut off the other and the result in terms of human communication has been catastrophic. Kasia Urbaniak

  • @Singirl22
    @Singirl22 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    Absolutely brilliant!!! So clearly explained. Thank you. 🙏🏾

  • @marcelaparedes8364
    @marcelaparedes8364 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    Finally, spanish subtitles done. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.

  • @marcelaparedes8364
    @marcelaparedes8364 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    GREAT TALK! I'd love to share that the spanish version will be available soon! I enjoyed so much translating this talk!

  • @shiram88
    @shiram88 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Wow, this is VERY helpful!!! ❤❤❤

  • @RoyceMunday56
    @RoyceMunday56 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Marvellous talk from an individual perspective... over-generalised to 'all boys' and 'all girls' - I accept that we must see things from our own experience. Thank you.

  • @pdxbk
    @pdxbk 3 ปีที่แล้ว +19

    Bravo! I've just watched a master share. Thank you. Came here from Russell Brand's teaser clip of their podcast.

    • @hassanarour
      @hassanarour 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      االقلبشصثبببقبىررررررىئرضيصبشبسبةىىىةىةبضفالتتتت٤٧٧شسكتععتللللث٥٥٤٤ققبث٤٥فففففهع٦غاا

    • @gulnuraltmsdort8994
      @gulnuraltmsdort8994 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@hassanarour ğ8ü

  • @ijeomarichards6402
    @ijeomarichards6402 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Amazingly simplified truth.

    • @Mario_toma
      @Mario_toma 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

      None of that Is true

  • @mhuuudhaarrarhhhmmmez4829
    @mhuuudhaarrarhhhmmmez4829 หลายเดือนก่อน

    This gives me hope.. that there are *1stly* (finding that more) -'PEOPLE' (but who are content to reason!).. but more (last but not least)..
    There is a real woman that can speak so strongly on the objectives and relevant condition in intelligence on upper degree to relate rightly (as!)

  • @grantlindsley2189
    @grantlindsley2189 4 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    Love attention as the focal point. This is great.

    • @nfjejcfjfhejd4142
      @nfjejcfjfhejd4142 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      ننننةتوززز
      زننكج
      ج
      ج
      ج
      ن
      ح
      ج
      نتززن

    • @nfjejcfjfhejd4142
      @nfjejcfjfhejd4142 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      زنن
      ح
      جخ
      جخ
      ح
      مد
      م
      نظ
      ن
      ننننن
      هنههه
      ههههههك
      هههح
      هك
      طم
      نن

  • @eemonexali
    @eemonexali 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    This is exactly.. what I needed. Thank you so much ❤️

  • @loufur4502
    @loufur4502 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    That's great for some situations and in some situations when you are out of the room you might get punished later for being in control in a blindsided and ambushed way so having a sense of discernment.

  • @Camila-do8ot
    @Camila-do8ot ปีที่แล้ว

    So eloquent, this topic is really important

  • @markobrkovic6651
    @markobrkovic6651 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I Put her as Superior being and I am her servant and I am proud my and most important her life is now Heaven

  • @anachocolate1262
    @anachocolate1262 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    I wished I knew about this talk before ! 😪💜

    • @karenjohannessen8987
      @karenjohannessen8987 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @Ana - Rather, celebrate that you know about it *now*!

  • @solfh
    @solfh หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I noticed this when I am dating, I realized men would avoid answering without me reclaiming an answer back and I just talk about my own conclusions and never get their real opinion. While I would answer all their questions automatically even if they are uncomfortable🙄

  • @gazelson4545
    @gazelson4545 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Very powerful.

  • @beatriceroosmark9796
    @beatriceroosmark9796 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Bought the book!! Loving this ❤️

  • @tahnyaiva4494
    @tahnyaiva4494 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    This should have millions of views

  • @natieleskate
    @natieleskate ปีที่แล้ว +1

    eu amei isso, i loved it

  • @estudiom142
    @estudiom142 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Bestial! Amazing!!!

  • @tahnyaiva4494
    @tahnyaiva4494 ปีที่แล้ว

    Absolutely incredible!!!

  • @wiolettaaleksandra9097
    @wiolettaaleksandra9097 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    💕💕💕 Kasia, pozdrawiam 🇵🇱 🇵🇱 🇵🇱

  • @goltanprav6389
    @goltanprav6389 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    really nice speech!!

  • @cbv1979
    @cbv1979 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Sandler Sales calls this reversing! It does not have to be men to put the pressure on women. It happened to me often by women who crossed a boundary.

  • @yomarcelojeje
    @yomarcelojeje 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    Great one.

  • @niomiphi5295
    @niomiphi5295 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    thanks for this

  • @md.raselal-farabi5796
    @md.raselal-farabi5796 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Energetic

  • @ReclaimByBeingYou
    @ReclaimByBeingYou 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    love this

  • @tdr_paraadvisor3996
    @tdr_paraadvisor3996 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    2022....thank you for this...do you do any narcissism videos (like surviving narcissistic abuse) ?

  • @martinhalsey843
    @martinhalsey843 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    thumbs up!!!

  • @JC-ce8uw
    @JC-ce8uw 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    Amazing 💞💞💞

  • @amazingyear9042
    @amazingyear9042 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    what men DO vs how woman ARE... societal training.

  • @dapsolita
    @dapsolita 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    ".....a fluid switching between dominant and submissive states." That's what I look for at the dog park.
    All healthy mammals are basically the same.

  • @SarahGK333
    @SarahGK333 ปีที่แล้ว

    How is it that there are 355K views, yet only 110 Comments on this piece of mastery?

  • @abuhakur193
    @abuhakur193 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Awesome

  • @beronicad.2580
    @beronicad.2580 ปีที่แล้ว

    👏 spot on!

  • @Lizpennington
    @Lizpennington 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Fantastic

  • @UmerFarooq-vx6ht
    @UmerFarooq-vx6ht 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    Amazing

  • @fiat2496
    @fiat2496 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Is there a Tedtalk about women reclaiming their hearts?

  • @MsMerkley
    @MsMerkley 4 ปีที่แล้ว +21

    Woooo! More of this hotness, less freezing women!

  • @johnsnow4065
    @johnsnow4065 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    nice speech

  • @BeingPeace922
    @BeingPeace922 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Excellent

  • @ShalomSarahJoy
    @ShalomSarahJoy 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    KASIA FOR PRESIDENT 2024

  • @robertatterton3102
    @robertatterton3102 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    I am impressed, good work!!!

    • @Jeshuaben_joseph
      @Jeshuaben_joseph 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Robert Atterton, this is NOT about YOU being impressed. Wow. Here is the problem in plain view.

  • @EverydaylifewithGael
    @EverydaylifewithGael ปีที่แล้ว

    Big factssssss

  • @angelaangela7168
    @angelaangela7168 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

    GENIALNE! BRAWO!!!!

  • @mantos1611
    @mantos1611 3 ปีที่แล้ว

  • @huzaifalia504
    @huzaifalia504 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    Best

  • @zapkaalia5006
    @zapkaalia5006 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    👍👍

  • @beatriceroosmark9796
    @beatriceroosmark9796 หลายเดือนก่อน

    ALWAYS APPROPRIATE TO ASK WHY SOMEONE IS ASKING A QUESTION!!! ❤️

  • @SundayCookingRemix
    @SundayCookingRemix 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Amen

  • @annusnoob1970
    @annusnoob1970 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    👍

  • @mehmetcoban1593
    @mehmetcoban1593 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    Tamam

  • @evadebruijn
    @evadebruijn ปีที่แล้ว

    🙏❣️
    ✌️

  • @timbongterence1400
    @timbongterence1400 ปีที่แล้ว

    I thank my father power Amen

  • @seriousgaming6969
    @seriousgaming6969 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    Good

  • @jenniferstclair8615
    @jenniferstclair8615 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I loved what you are saying but I get in trouble when I speak at times. I speak as I see it calls a spoon a spoon call a fork a fork. I have a relationship with a Muslim guy who in my opinion have a problem expressing himself to me. I am very independent assertive sometimes bold and hold a senior position in my job. So I try not to say much around him

  • @claudetesiqueira310
    @claudetesiqueira310 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    Traduzir em português

  • @AlwaysHereAndNow
    @AlwaysHereAndNow 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    That was amazing! But what's up with the fake crowd?

  • @TOPTRENDING10M
    @TOPTRENDING10M 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Stay home, stay safe everyone. Time doesn't stop, so hard times will pass too.

  • @sebo641
    @sebo641 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Intro is a bit run on but it's worth staying

  • @Angrymobs62
    @Angrymobs62 ปีที่แล้ว

    I like that outfit though

  • @UmerFarooq-vx6ht
    @UmerFarooq-vx6ht 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    :)

  • @rafaelsontaya2835
    @rafaelsontaya2835 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Trauma response at work!

  • @michaelapril2463
    @michaelapril2463 ปีที่แล้ว

    Kolejny jakże pusty ale nowoczesny baniak - K. Urbaniak.

  • @hasancltk1635
    @hasancltk1635 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    Z

  • @utsavpathak7185
    @utsavpathak7185 ปีที่แล้ว

    What about start with cleaning dishes.

  • @Facts-First
    @Facts-First 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    What a pretty

  • @jameshendershott2170
    @jameshendershott2170 ปีที่แล้ว

    men don't need the instructions. We aren't necessarily agreeable. Personally I think it's a big mistake for a woman to man up on men by asking them questions. This technique is just a band-aid, and the root problem will continue to resurface until basic insecurity is taken care of.

  • @Katu3572
    @Katu3572 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    Creepy

  • @sgordon8123
    @sgordon8123 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    The shoes ruin it for me. They are so crazy! Surely men make you want to wear such ridiculous shoes? Be bolder. Be comfortable. Be healthy. Women don't need to wear power dress stuff. You are enough without them.

    • @katietheriault6387
      @katietheriault6387 2 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Your attention on her looks rather than her work/message speaks exactly to her point.

    • @daniellek7233
      @daniellek7233 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      ​@@katietheriault6387 the irony 😂😂

  • @eve4468
    @eve4468 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Good message, shame you had to make it political. Lost me there, as a woman, your example doesn't speak to me and frankly diverted your focus and goal.

    • @urbanet1939
      @urbanet1939 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      It’s still true if you look at her example objectively. Her paradigm goes beyond politics. It’s universal.

    • @GinaHatzisTooMuchWoman
      @GinaHatzisTooMuchWoman ปีที่แล้ว

      Her political example is poignant and relevant

  • @beenishtariq2850
    @beenishtariq2850 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    Awesome

  • @haripadadas7442
    @haripadadas7442 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Best

  • @otisdesigns4434
    @otisdesigns4434 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    👍