Masculine Gay Culture

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 9 พ.ค. 2024
  • Welcome Back, Friends! Today we go into the world of Masc 4 Masc and see what is going on.
    If you would like to join my Patreon Community where I can talk to you directly and join discussions on future and past videos!
    / jaksattacks
    Hope the day is a beautiful one and See you Next time!
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ความคิดเห็น • 633

  • @1jotun136
    @1jotun136 หลายเดือนก่อน +653

    I find performative masculinity just as tiresome as performative femininity.
    Just be yourself.

    • @hermaphrodits7685
      @hermaphrodits7685 12 วันที่ผ่านมา

      SAY IT LOUDER FOR THEM B1TCHES AT THE BACK!!!

    • @isaa8521
      @isaa8521 10 วันที่ผ่านมา +12

      🎯🎯🎯🎯

    • @chefssaltybawlz
      @chefssaltybawlz 5 วันที่ผ่านมา +5

      No such thing exists. Lmao. If you aren’t masculine you can’t “perform” it, Sean Cody has shown us all many examples 💀

    • @ezequielmondada6427
      @ezequielmondada6427 5 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

      ​@@chefssaltybawlzyou absolutely can. XD

    • @Harry-fk5of
      @Harry-fk5of 5 วันที่ผ่านมา +7

      @@chefssaltybawlz Of course you can. It's acting, people do it all the time to disguise who they really are

  • @ollylevesque3404
    @ollylevesque3404 หลายเดือนก่อน +734

    Also, not liking drag race is not being “insecure” most people in general across all demographics just simply aren’t interested. I don’t find it entertaining. People need to stop trying to project their own insecure on others with buzzwords and claims of “bigotry” that aren’t real.

    • @leeshepherd5669
      @leeshepherd5669 หลายเดือนก่อน +27

      NOT LIKING DRAG IS JUST PLAN DAMN STUPID...DRAG IS SOME OF THE MOST FLATTERING ENTERTAINMENT.

    • @ManuMiAS
      @ManuMiAS หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@leeshepherd5669 drag is disgusting, and not everybody has to like it, it's even so stupid that now women are being drags too, it lost it's meaning

    • @jdjordan4425
      @jdjordan4425 หลายเดือนก่อน +69

      I dont like the show Drag Race either. I do enjoy a drag show every once in a while - they can be very entertaining but not so much the show Drag Race, at least not for me.

    • @jdjordan4425
      @jdjordan4425 หลายเดือนก่อน +66

      @@leeshepherd5669 I dont think he is saying "drag" in general. He is referring to the show "Drag Race" and I honestly dont enjoy it either. I do enjoy a good live drag show tho....
      And saying "not liking X is just plain stupid" is well... just silly. What one person likes or finds entertaining another will not and its not stupid - its subjective. I like hiking... others hate it. Its not stupid to hate it.

    • @user-uu4ys1rp7s
      @user-uu4ys1rp7s 29 วันที่ผ่านมา +60

      @@leeshepherd5669 lol no. Drag isnt fun or entertaining at all to me. Dont push your stereotypes on us

  • @SAGUY1971
    @SAGUY1971 27 วันที่ผ่านมา +302

    Thanks for addressing this . Many of us , just want to be who we are. I dont want to fit a "stereotype". I too, live on a farm , service my own tractor and farm equipment, love to go camping, keep various animals on my farm , do DIY home improvement projects . I live my life on my own terms and dont allow my sexual orientation to define what I do, how I act, how I dress etc etc. A bit of advice is to live your life authentically and be your best self and not fall into some category that others want to place one in.

    • @CheckingINN
      @CheckingINN 16 วันที่ผ่านมา +5

      My type of guy!!

    • @brunomd288
      @brunomd288 15 วันที่ผ่านมา +9

      Valid, some people like being feminine, some like being masculine. That’s life

    • @JamesHightower18
      @JamesHightower18 14 วันที่ผ่านมา +6

      @@brunomd288 and some people don’t like masculine guys and some don’t like feminine, another thing that this community has a problem with for some reason 🤷‍♂️

    • @brunomd288
      @brunomd288 13 วันที่ผ่านมา +2

      @@JamesHightower18 but i see why theres a problem. I mean i do believe everyone has a way of seeing life and it’s definitely shaped by what we have lived. So people who like more masculine guys have just seen life that way, and people who like feminine maybe had some enlightening experience that made them like more fem. So when one can’t understand the other is when the conflict arises. I do believe both sides a right though.

    • @yomilala8929
      @yomilala8929 5 วันที่ผ่านมา +3

      ​@@JamesHightower18 The problem isn't really about not liking feminine men. The problem is about homophobia inside the LGBT community. Many femenine gays are mistreated, dismissed and even harmed by masculine gays.

  • @johnferradino
    @johnferradino 22 วันที่ผ่านมา +366

    I'm masc and i had, for the first time, a fem boyfriend for several years. I gotta say, i learned a lot about being myself and being comfortable in my own skin from him. We broke up eventually, but that is one priceless lesson i owe to him.

    • @sombrego2260
      @sombrego2260 12 วันที่ผ่านมา +11

      I have a similar experience. My ex and friends I met recently taught me a lot about myself as a result it was very refreshing.

    • @FirstLast-ii5cp
      @FirstLast-ii5cp 11 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

      That’s awesome

    • @JimmyPageTV
      @JimmyPageTV 7 วันที่ผ่านมา +5

      That’s dope, Would be interested if they learned anything from you

    • @johnferradino
      @johnferradino 7 วันที่ผ่านมา +10

      @@JimmyPageTV in fact he told me he did! When we first met, he was always trying to appear as if he/we had a lot of money. He wanted to impress all these fake, arrogant, shallow people. He learned from me that what they think doesn't matter. A different version of "be yourself"

    • @aclstudios
      @aclstudios 6 วันที่ผ่านมา

      Judging by your pic... no offense dude, but you are not masc.

  • @user-yv9fq5ym9w
    @user-yv9fq5ym9w 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +404

    I pass as a masculine because it's just natural to me. Sometimes it is hard when you have to explain why you're not interested in a strip club or why you don't wanna meet someone's sister, cousin , coworker etc.

    • @user-uf7tg2tt3x
      @user-uf7tg2tt3x หลายเดือนก่อน +35

      Same bruv, I was raised in the countryside, mostly taking care of chickens

    • @ELP1125
      @ELP1125 หลายเดือนก่อน +11

      THAT PART

    • @user-uf7tg2tt3x
      @user-uf7tg2tt3x หลายเดือนก่อน

      I don't get it

    • @john.premose
      @john.premose หลายเดือนก่อน

      Exactly, I hate the assumption that masculine guys are really queens underneath but they're just suppressing it. The queen persona is put on and affected as much as any other, there's nothing natural about it.

    • @DewtbArenatsiz
      @DewtbArenatsiz 29 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

      Just wait till you're old lol

  • @chadcrigger3101
    @chadcrigger3101 23 วันที่ผ่านมา +170

    I always thought our community was so diverse with people but lately it has become very narrow in perspective.

    • @CamoLoTiProd
      @CamoLoTiProd 17 วันที่ผ่านมา

      I'm a Christian who struggled with homosexual tendencies, but I knew from the start I wouldn't ever support the rest of the LGBTQ+ community. There's too much hypocrisy and there are too many attacks on children (Which I'm technically still a part of) for me to actively wish it well. The community went from a unifying force for different sexualities to this weird divisive monster of a group that treats anyone who they don't like as trash.

    • @choblgobblrr1074
      @choblgobblrr1074 11 วันที่ผ่านมา

      How

    • @aclstudios
      @aclstudios 6 วันที่ผ่านมา +2

      Lately? Nah this has been a thing for decades.

    • @kaymillerfromTX
      @kaymillerfromTX 5 วันที่ผ่านมา +4

      @@aclstudios True. Just like when you commented “judging by your pic you aren’t masc” to a Guy on another thread. There’s some who will always judge and hold their biases even for “decades” 👀

    • @TheIvyLens
      @TheIvyLens 3 วันที่ผ่านมา

      Exactly. The effeminate gays have been building influence and power and seek to expand cancel culture into the “community”. The alphabet mafia and pronoun gustapo have made me unregister as a democrat and I won’t be voting “blue” for the first time in my life.
      It’s the age old tale of the oppressed becoming the oppressor. Insert Hotel Rawanda here. Part of the queer community has been been weaponizing their identity for years now.
      An effect from, condemning toxic masculine into equating masculinity with toxic behavior, etc. Which at least gave rise to a champion of common sense like Jordan Peterson.
      I have no qualms with shutting down and condemning my own peoples for abusive behavior. The same behavior they themselves once condemned.
      It’s our own responsibility to call out our own bigotry and hypocrisy.
      How are you going the be trans and non binary. The math is not mathing. This is verbal gymnastics in order to control discourse and weaponize identity.
      How are you going to create the term “cis” and at the same time conflate the word “women” in public discourse. You can’t be a preacher of differentiated lived experiences and also breadth down someone’s neck when they use the word “woman” in the traditional sense. It’s psychotic.

  • @hungrytroodontid
    @hungrytroodontid 13 วันที่ผ่านมา +70

    I look and dress masculine (workout, beard, Levi’s, work boots), but have feminine mannerisms (higher pitch voice, excessive hand gestures, silly poses).
    When in straight male spaces, I don’t relate to a lot of what they say, and the dudes often want me to "man up." But in LGBT spaces, the people like me if they focus on my nonconformity aspects to the point of infantilisation. It’s as if they accept me "despite" my masculine characteristics.
    I’m left feeling like I can’t fully relate to either group. I’m still figuring it out.

    • @Deg40000
      @Deg40000 10 วันที่ผ่านมา +6

      Yeah I can relate to you there. I like to be a bit of both and have a balance between my masculinity and femininity so I tend to want the same in a partner. I’m still trying to navigate my masculinity since I’ve recently came out as trans as well.

    • @Harry-fk5of
      @Harry-fk5of 5 วันที่ผ่านมา +2

      People just love to stereotype and put others in a nice box so they don't feel uncomfortable. It's one of the worst aspects of living in society Imo

    • @christiano_vibez
      @christiano_vibez 4 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

      Its very tricky to deal with. Finding those who accept you no matter what means they understand you have good intentions & dont project there previous experiences onto you. I find queer bookshops or sober spaces more inclusive that way as im very much like you

    • @hinaguiza8810
      @hinaguiza8810 2 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

      This except I'm a big tall masc woman who's actually a silly geese at heart. it's frustrating but I'm figuring out what works for me, good luck to your journey.

  • @sleuer66
    @sleuer66 หลายเดือนก่อน +220

    I am a military veteran. Former competitive amateur body biulder, I have always been masc. It is who I am. I think it is the other way around. My security of being masculine, make other gays that are more fem, feel insecure.

    • @MrYokahu
      @MrYokahu หลายเดือนก่อน +32

      Respectfully, could you please elaborate on what you meant by, "My security of being masculine make other gays that are more fem, feel insecure."? I want to understand your statement/opinion!

    • @SOCCERNUT32
      @SOCCERNUT32 หลายเดือนก่อน +14

      Thank you for your service brotha.

    • @wertyghjkl-fc3dx
      @wertyghjkl-fc3dx หลายเดือนก่อน +5

      really? I've never felt that way when even trying to meet people that are masc like you suggest you are. trusting someone like you...different story though...like someone I've known for years...never know how they'll react.

    • @boygraphychannel
      @boygraphychannel หลายเดือนก่อน +5

      yeah right. i hope your skirt was right side front when you wrote this.

    • @boygraphychannel
      @boygraphychannel หลายเดือนก่อน +4

      @@SOCCERNUT32 you mean sista

  • @Aginob568
    @Aginob568 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +256

    I’m not really into drag race, I would rather be out in my work shop at night instead.

    • @RomanJockMCO
      @RomanJockMCO 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      I don't know, it's amazing sometimes what can happen in 1320'

    • @bradroth7005
      @bradroth7005 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

      me too!

    • @kaymillerfromTX
      @kaymillerfromTX หลายเดือนก่อน +22

      Most of us aren’t. Idk why this keeps getting pushed on us as a talking point for some “culture” we don’t have.

    • @boygraphychannel
      @boygraphychannel หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      wearing a frock while in the workshop?

    • @akrenwinkle
      @akrenwinkle 26 วันที่ผ่านมา

      @@boygraphychannel I would say, "Get the frock out of here!"

  • @longmundawam5739
    @longmundawam5739 11 วันที่ผ่านมา +20

    I'm just myself. I don't know whether I'm faminine or masculine. But people say I walk like a woman. That happens unconsciously, so I won't adjust my footsteps for someone just because i want to proof my masculinity

    • @chrisjackson8151
      @chrisjackson8151 3 วันที่ผ่านมา +3

      Please, just be yourself…okay? ❤

    • @Max-hk1oc
      @Max-hk1oc 3 วันที่ผ่านมา

      Ive been told this so many times and hunny idgaf I’ll sashay my way down that hall so cuntiliciously if it means making straight boys mad at freedom of expression 😂

  • @wellschr888
    @wellschr888 หลายเดือนก่อน +152

    I have always liked more masculine men. I have been told that for a small guy who enjoys wearing jewelry, rings on every finger. Colorful clothes. Ears double pierced. You can still be masculine and wear what you want.

    • @steppenwolf584
      @steppenwolf584 27 วันที่ผ่านมา +7

      Exactly, bud. You do you 👍

    • @brunomd288
      @brunomd288 15 วันที่ผ่านมา +7

      Yeah but I think we shouldn’t think we can STILL be masculine. Like yeah we can be, or not. And it’s okay, you don’t stop being a “man” because you acted feminine. But yeah I have a certain attraction towards masculine men too, but I feel like that comes from me liking being more feminine. Either way, I think taste in men evolves with time

    • @Fedderz
      @Fedderz 6 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

      From the COMMENTS the ONLY thing I see IS TOXIC MASCULINITY!! Homophobia in its ranks … says it all

    • @Isaac-ci5wy
      @Isaac-ci5wy 6 วันที่ผ่านมา

      100000%

    • @yomilala8929
      @yomilala8929 5 วันที่ผ่านมา

      That doesn't sound very masculine 🤣🤦🏾‍♂️

  • @akaflint10
    @akaflint10 หลายเดือนก่อน +187

    Masculine, not 'masculine acting'- it's not an act. Not everyone is or wants to be a stereotype.

    • @Biserbalkanski
      @Biserbalkanski 29 วันที่ผ่านมา +2

      😂

    • @colt9836
      @colt9836 17 วันที่ผ่านมา

      You can ONLY act masculine, my friend. Masculinity and femininity can only be described by the stereotypes society ascribes to them. Gender is a performance, something that we project to others. It tells others how we view ourselves and how they should view us.
      "We are all born naked and the rest is literally drag."

    • @TCt83067695
      @TCt83067695 12 วันที่ผ่านมา +14

      Baby I'm about to blow your mind. I think you'll find we are all acting just to get through this thing called life.
      You learnt to act in a way society defines as masculine. It's not like you were born that way

    • @HeortirtheWoodwarden
      @HeortirtheWoodwarden 12 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

      ​@@TCt83067695 Social constructivism is nothing but a lie pushed to justify totalitarianism and social engineering. Half of your behavior and personality is determined by your genetics. Men and Women evolved differently to fulfill different roles for the species, so of course that's genetically encoded.

    • @akaflint10
      @akaflint10 12 วันที่ผ่านมา

      @@TCt83067695 I don't put on an act for anyone, I'm being myself. And that comes across as masculine.

  • @tysonvslewis12
    @tysonvslewis12 28 วันที่ผ่านมา +101

    You know….. as a super passing masc top, I am sooooo THANKFUL for the cute fem guys that peak my interest! How boring would it be if we lacked diversity in our community?

    • @timojarun7830
      @timojarun7830 27 วันที่ผ่านมา

      I agree. Someone should handle those little chickens. Meanwhile I like to prey super passing masculine tops and make them bottom.

    • @kayde.g
      @kayde.g 17 วันที่ผ่านมา +12

      exactly. we should be appreciating the diversity instead of trying to divide us

    • @tysonvslewis12
      @tysonvslewis12 17 วันที่ผ่านมา +4

      @@kayde.g exactly!

    • @CheckingINN
      @CheckingINN 16 วันที่ผ่านมา +8

      Thanks for saying this! The whole masc for masc thing is so ridiculous

    • @tysonvslewis12
      @tysonvslewis12 16 วันที่ผ่านมา +5

      @@CheckingINN right! I honestly just don’t get it. I LOVE fem guys and just have zero interest in masc guys

  • @badpiggies988
    @badpiggies988 16 วันที่ผ่านมา +37

    How quickly we as a community have gone from "you don't need homophobes to tell you how to live your life" to "you need *other gays* to tell you how to live your life!!!1!", and basically try to force people into two extremely-polarizing cliques that both hate each other and often see each other's very existence as a personal affront. What many of the people complaining about us masculine men-attracted guys (I say that because I'm bisexual) don't realize is that not everyone is personally interested in the same things or attracted to the same qualities. A feminine boyfriend would be nice imo (heck many of us bisexuals tend to be partial to the androgynous-looking), but they are not entitled to my body. Conversely, the reason why many of us masc guys are hated is because too often many of our arguments consist of "I'm not personally into/interested in X" followed by a dig at those who might be (I'm not saying you do this, I agree with your points).

    • @leeshepherd5669
      @leeshepherd5669 10 วันที่ผ่านมา

      this is a question....Bisexual men tend to like the fem looking guys Or trans even...... Why? Is it because they don't want to be thiought of as liking males only ?

    • @badpiggies988
      @badpiggies988 10 วันที่ผ่านมา +6

      @@leeshepherd5669 I dunno about the others, but for me it has nothing to do with how others may see me and is just because I like people who embody “both types of attractive” as I call it. Heck I still have yet to work up the courage to ask anyone out, male or female lol

    • @leeshepherd5669
      @leeshepherd5669 10 วันที่ผ่านมา +2

      @@badpiggies988 Fair enough!!

    • @CynthiaNotG
      @CynthiaNotG 6 วันที่ผ่านมา +3

      @@leeshepherd5669Lmao not even close to true. Most bi people don’t even “identify” as you kids say because it comes with this… RULES AND REGULATIONS.

  • @LovelyBlockGame-jv3eq
    @LovelyBlockGame-jv3eq 12 วันที่ผ่านมา +10

    I watched every aspect from beginning to end. Every second, every minute is so relatable.

  • @juliancarroll1129
    @juliancarroll1129 หลายเดือนก่อน +35

    Remember : Rupaul said long ago " that we are ALL born naked; and the rest is drag"

    • @paperboy8865
      @paperboy8865 10 วันที่ผ่านมา +5

      Can I get an Amen up in here?

    • @pepethefrog2
      @pepethefrog2 5 วันที่ผ่านมา

      😭😭💀

  • @dereakcolumbus3603
    @dereakcolumbus3603 11 วันที่ผ่านมา +6

    Love your progress in your self awareness. Itd be fun examining you personally (from a masters psychology student perspective)

  • @acenull0
    @acenull0 28 วันที่ผ่านมา +22

    Thank you for a rational take 😂 there's too few of us to really be infighting 😂

  • @nate3556
    @nate3556 16 วันที่ผ่านมา +14

    I’d say I’m pretty in the middle of masc and fem and the second my voice goes deeper I get comments like “oh stop trying to act manly” or “stop doing that voice” and I hate it.

    • @14ariel77
      @14ariel77 2 วันที่ผ่านมา

      I guess you’re hanging out with the flamboyant feminine type 🤮

  • @lugnut4848
    @lugnut4848 หลายเดือนก่อน +22

    Let’s all just get along! ❤️👍👏

    • @ATREIDESDUNCAN88
      @ATREIDESDUNCAN88 27 วันที่ผ่านมา

      They won't. All perverted. Unfriendly and not looking for a relationship.

    • @themonsterwithin4000
      @themonsterwithin4000 25 วันที่ผ่านมา

      A community full of men can never have peace.

  • @ramkumarsubramanian5502
    @ramkumarsubramanian5502 2 วันที่ผ่านมา

    We'll spoken and I love the fact how honest are you with your thoughts and feelings. Hate is wrong 👏 very well said. I hope this eye opener for all the prejudice within the community.

  • @magicmic-uf6ws
    @magicmic-uf6ws 4 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

    thank you for addressing this and also beyond just that ✨️

  • @thomasjoyce7870
    @thomasjoyce7870 หลายเดือนก่อน +35

    This is my first time bumping into you: I really enjoyed hearing your comments. I'm a older guy (well, ok, an old guy) who mentally believes I'm still 30 (my body dictates otherwise 😂). I'm so impressed that a young guy such as yourself is comfortable putting himself so squarely in the public eye. But you have spoken truth to truth.
    I was bred into an Ohio, rural, Appalachian village. I knew I liked boys from age 5 or so and spent the next 15 years in the closet. I didn't like football (it hurts), but I did like basketball and track, so I was safe. Plus, I was smart. Plus, I was a sosch. I spent most of my maturing years in Long Beach, CA (so, LA; hell yeah!) Your take on masc vs fem is dead on, and I appreciate that you, like me, have been able to date both. Kudos to you.

  • @jamesjames1364
    @jamesjames1364 4 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

    Everything about you, and your presentation, is impressive! Double Bravo to you!!

  • @greathornedowl3644
    @greathornedowl3644 หลายเดือนก่อน +10

    Thank you for sharing. Great topic, coming from a burly masculine man

  • @bmxboyzac
    @bmxboyzac หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    I guess I never really thought about some of the things that you said but thinking I didn’t now they’re definitely there

  • @richardstokstad9271
    @richardstokstad9271 29 วันที่ผ่านมา +12

    very well spoken Jaks.

  • @kevindigo22
    @kevindigo22 4 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Great video...very articulate, well thought out, yeah...what can I say, I am impressed!!

  • @InimicalWit
    @InimicalWit 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +41

    I think the general problem is people who don’t like who someone else is attracted to, because it’s not them. A terrible sort of echo then happens in the consciousness of different people.
    People want diversity, but then they want those around them to demonstrate attraction to a diversity - that includes them. Because they too often see attraction include not-them. Then, when heard, others become derisive about these passed-over people. Negative attitudes feed negative attitudes until those passed over become terribly bitter, get called “incel” as an accusation, and then almost explicitly denied the love and compassion they were only ever asking for in the first place.
    I totally agree with something you said: Generalizing to absolutes is what creates the nest to grow prejudice.
    Be kind to each other 💙

    • @loganbradd9472
      @loganbradd9472 8 วันที่ผ่านมา

      This is probably the smartest response I've heard so far

    • @chrisjackson8151
      @chrisjackson8151 3 วันที่ผ่านมา

      The best response ever! Welcome to woke culture: where it wants diversity, but not diversity of thought. These are the same people who are self-righteous about how anti-this or anti-that they are, and you must demonstrate it by being vocal about it…otherwise youre a bigot!

  • @davidmcdonald1898
    @davidmcdonald1898 27 วันที่ผ่านมา +8

    Hello. Love your video. I might point out that in addition to insecurity, another factor in the social conflict you (accurately) describe is the changing nature of society itself. And these changes seem to go right to the heart of our shared concepts and values, especially in the U.S., which includes, as you point out, ageism and racial tension, among others. Right now, we're so hypersensitive on just about every issue that we're running out of qualifiers before we even come to terms.
    Here's my point: The fact that public mannerisms, not to mention gender identity and sexual orientation, are under fearful scrutiny and criticism is not so mystifying. I'm in the Boomer generation and have had the opportunity of seeing these changes, even sharing rooms with two trans women in my late teens, and my head is still spinning. (Incidentally, this intergenerational hostility I've seen lately -- we Boomers called it the "Generation Gap -- is a discussion I would LOVE to have someday -- talk about stereotyping!) Anyway, I'm joining up, and thanks!

  • @dodelphi
    @dodelphi 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +51

    My philosophy of life is live and let live. As long as our choices and actions don't hurt others, then our life and the way we choose to live it is no one else's business. I'm masc and so agree whole heartedly with your perspective.

  • @manpower2078
    @manpower2078 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +35

    I didn't know there's a "culture" to being just happy with what u got. I am way , waaay out if these community-labeled-theories.

  • @xxangelicdudexx
    @xxangelicdudexx 19 วันที่ผ่านมา +5

    I think some people over generalize and judge people by a trait instead of assessing people individually. I had a masculine friend that would always put me down for my feminine traits. He was also tall and white where I am short and mixed race. He would often make fun of me for those traits while boosting up himself for his traits so I learned not to associate with him. It was insulting to rub his privileges in my face. I have seen a large amount of masculine men with this mentality, so I can understand why men with feminine traits may hold resentment and retaliate. Hurt people hurt people. However, I know not all masculine men have this mindset. My current partner is masculine.

  • @genehauser9217
    @genehauser9217 28 วันที่ผ่านมา +10

    You look quite stunning and masculine in that cowboy hat I must say!

  • @SladeSanctuary
    @SladeSanctuary 9 วันที่ผ่านมา

    What an amazing video! I really like the parallel between the both polarities being a bit too extreme in what they think. Thanks for deleting both sides equally!

  • @ThomasDooley-lb1pz
    @ThomasDooley-lb1pz หลายเดือนก่อน +11

    Just be you, your you. Don't give a toss about what's expected of you, from whomever. You are unique and wonderful as you are, enjoy.

  • @yasspanda2559
    @yasspanda2559 5 วันที่ผ่านมา +2

    I'm just so tired of labels 😞 i have two friend groups who never interact with one another. I can pass (being in the closet is good practice), but I also like being with my rainbow and glitter friends. I love Drag Race! I love letting go of the restraints I put on myself when I'm around my bros.

  • @Horroryoga
    @Horroryoga 26 วันที่ผ่านมา +4

    “Having lived it” “I was there” “what was necessary to survive the 70’s 80’s … the secret language ..the code..” when did I age into to these phrases!?? But there it is, the hidden history, the whole experience right there within me. It’s a lot !

  • @ollylevesque3404
    @ollylevesque3404 หลายเดือนก่อน +90

    It’s crazy to me that the younger generation is taking offense to men being attracted to men and if we aren’t a walking stereotype, WE are the problem, not them lol.

    • @leeshepherd5669
      @leeshepherd5669 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

      Who told you all that ?

    • @s.yang.12
      @s.yang.12 หลายเดือนก่อน +42

      I don't take offense if someone isn't attracted to me. I only take offense if they try to shame me for being feminine, imply that I'm less of a man than them, or reduce me to a stereotype. we can all respect each other regardless of who we're attracted to :)

    • @adamjohnson7047
      @adamjohnson7047 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

      The gross harm ‘Masculine’ men have caused others in the ‘Community’ is really what is offensive.

    • @Eovar_Endre
      @Eovar_Endre หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@adamjohnson7047 don't rule out media, both pop and underground, also porn. Read about that twinky dude who passes for not being of age. That sells (clicks). Disgusting but commercially understandable. Dude's gotta live, right or whatever.

    • @Biserbalkanski
      @Biserbalkanski 29 วันที่ผ่านมา +3

      ​@s.yang.12 I got your back and you're cool chilling with me 😊 I know what you're saying and I ran into plenty of cool guys like that. and standing up for yourself is a turn on to me and I'm total butch 😂! stand your ground ❤! I don't expect most guys to do the things I like.

  • @TH-pv3bc
    @TH-pv3bc 11 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Jaks be happy whatever you’re feeling great about everything in term of style clothing choice or act in your life, somebody else opinion isn’t matter, only you can define your life 😍 especially the community, they’re also can’t define your life as their wish.

  • @yellowtoad6803
    @yellowtoad6803 28 วันที่ผ่านมา +21

    Totally agree, humans are multifaceted and we all should be allowed to explore different expressions and not pertain to one role or stereotype all the time. Just be who you are. :)

  • @delmerfry3689
    @delmerfry3689 28 วันที่ผ่านมา +10

    Thank you for putting this out there.
    Good rule of thumb.. to be yourself.
    :)

  • @KiltedGreen
    @KiltedGreen วันที่ผ่านมา

    This is a really interesting video, thank you.

  • @Cheateaux
    @Cheateaux 10 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Cool video, very concise and insightful, not to mention relatable. I’m a fairly bro-type bi man, and there’s many parallels with feeling compelled to act a certain way; in my case just throw women into the mix, and their preconceptions of a masculine/acceptable (/datable when I was single) man, which is a whole other can of worms. I just think everyone has something they bring to the table and should be valued by how they care for others and carry themselves with integrity, yknow all the stuff that matters. I love that my bf acts sassy often, but I would never call him explicitly feminine. He’s just my handsome/cute fella who I adore. And I definitely wouldn’t one him to act like one of my bros! It’s something I try not to even think about too much, but society has done a lot to mess with our self-perception and that of others to an unhealthy degree :/
    Best of luck to everyone on their journey into being themselves and living life how they best see fit

  • @leebuckton3453
    @leebuckton3453 7 วันที่ผ่านมา +3

    We’re on the same page Jaks, lets get coffee ❤

  • @superstonerboy8670
    @superstonerboy8670 6 วันที่ผ่านมา

    I could write a lot about this video. For the sake of being meaningful.I just want to say thank you for making this video.

  • @superfate9424
    @superfate9424 22 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

    I’ve been finding that many people with these opinions are simply on the path to evolving. Some won’t should they be stuck in a stagnant environment WITH a stagnant mindset but some will progress especially if they manage to change their environments and seek growth. These types of shortsighted opinions of people are usually accompanied by other shortsights in other fields. Often the person who generalizes will continue to generalize until the grow to a more sophisticated model of perceiving the world they are in.

  • @Deadbeatdebonair
    @Deadbeatdebonair วันที่ผ่านมา

    One vital moving part that I think is usually missed in these conversations is the topic of Androphilia. Some guys whether it was developmental or a biological inclination are more specifically attracted to masculinity and masculine traits in general. That could mean the broad shoulders, the build, the temperament etc. It’s not always a case of insecurity or self hatred, some guys literally can’t help their preference, and sometimes that Androphilia gets internalized, meaning they can have a hard time finding themselves attractive or being comfortable with themselves in more feminine contexts. I don’t think that’s a bad thing or is something that needs to be changed or worked on, it literally just boils down to preference. But either way like you said, when that preference turns into a superiority complex and gets projected outwards, it’s really uncalled for and just further pits us against eachother unnecessarily

  • @tiagobuarki
    @tiagobuarki 21 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

    I really liked to hear what you had to say.

  • @timetraveler6949
    @timetraveler6949 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Wow, you just described two that I met last year and had brief encounters with...great perspective.

  • @GalacticGalahad
    @GalacticGalahad 11 วันที่ผ่านมา +3

    I'm 30, masc and, in a sense, quite old fashioned. If you think the masc/fem divide brings out the worst in people, try telling our GBT brothers that you're a spiritual person and see what happens. Every lazy, unthoughtful prejudice is projected on one's psyche in neon. In the end I gave up trying and moved to the woods with my cat and dog.

    • @chrisjackson8151
      @chrisjackson8151 3 วันที่ผ่านมา

      My friend, you did the smart thing! This is why I no longer hang around the “community.” For a community that is supposedly about love and acceptance, they certainly dont mind engaging in the same discriminatory behavior that they are supposedly against. Those who mind dont matter, and those who matter dont mind.

  • @robparham1300
    @robparham1300 หลายเดือนก่อน +33

    Dude you got the cowboy hat on backwards.

    • @user-bh6jr8xd1y
      @user-bh6jr8xd1y หลายเดือนก่อน +6

      🤣

    • @theofficialclownhq
      @theofficialclownhq หลายเดือนก่อน +12

      he still looks cute😭

    • @austinhk2829
      @austinhk2829 26 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

      Dead😂

    • @kobusgrove985
      @kobusgrove985 26 วันที่ผ่านมา +5

      No to stress.....that`s his fem side coming out.....

    • @carlorizzo827
      @carlorizzo827 26 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

      Guffaw I couldn't tell

  • @ernestohernandez2451
    @ernestohernandez2451 หลายเดือนก่อน +9

    I believe you are exactly right. I couldn't agree more. Too bad everyone doesn't open their eyes and see it. Thanks!

  • @coltaine503
    @coltaine503 หลายเดือนก่อน +28

    Complex issue. One point I'd like to make is that these 'groups' or 'communities' are both afraid of being pushed to the margins by the existence of the other. Which is nonsense of course. But the amplification of identity politics has only buttressed every faction's take. Imo it tends to fracture than bridge. I'm a 72 years old and I hate to see the hate being lobbed from all sides.

  • @stuartjones3001
    @stuartjones3001 4 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Joyous Jaks = Brave! Our Warrior Hero! Super Man! :)x

  • @davidbolt5113
    @davidbolt5113 8 วันที่ผ่านมา +16

    I’m all for Masc4Masc…. Nothing beats it.

    • @poopoopeepee211
      @poopoopeepee211 วันที่ผ่านมา

      personally I dont like masculine men at all. feminine men have a much more appealing personality to me, but hey different strokes for different folks

  • @johnlewis195
    @johnlewis195 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +18

    Noone believes me that I'm Gay..I'm just me

  • @user-oo1ch3rp4q
    @user-oo1ch3rp4q 11 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

    Your my new Rolemodel now😌

  • @paulgoodshaw1636
    @paulgoodshaw1636 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

    You were every good at communicating your message. I hope over time that people listening to your pod casting, will have a shift in their thinking and understand that each and everyone of us are different, in one way or another. We need to look at what we have in common rather than what we don't.
    Stay safe and keep up the. good work

  • @sportiboye
    @sportiboye 22 วันที่ผ่านมา

    I like Jax and even though there's a hefty age difference between us, he exhibits a maturity and self-awareness that is quite unique. This kid's got a good mind, a big heart......and he is going places in life, even if he stays "on the farm" and keeps writing his thoughts down. How Jax excaped the self hate I grew up with is inspirational, a minor miracle.~thomas plagemann*san francisco, CA

  • @OLDS98
    @OLDS98 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +9

    Well stated. Well thought out too. You put the facts out there and explained why. We put these barriers on the community and instead of pulling together we are hurting each other. People must let people live. People know what they like and what they desire to do. It is the outside influences and inside influences that create these barriers. These are real issues that are in the community that most people face. I subscribed today December, 2023.

  • @TheWorldsNo1Superstar
    @TheWorldsNo1Superstar 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +20

    Screw acting one way or another to please anyone's opinion of myself. Like me or not, others' opinions are not my concern. I love the man in the mirror. That's all that matters. You said it! Insecurity makes everyone be so defensive leaving clear their insecurities ❤❤❤

    • @Adam17.jayfrogg
      @Adam17.jayfrogg 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Omg yes I so agree with you!❤

  • @andrewgonzales1359
    @andrewgonzales1359 19 วันที่ผ่านมา

    I also didn't know you studied anthropology, my senior thesis advisor was an anthropology PhD.

  • @davidlee1603
    @davidlee1603 หลายเดือนก่อน +14

    I IM just like you.Raised blue collar. Did all the sports also. Except football. Ech!
    The world runs on two things. Fear & Love. That's it. I see the divisiveness you express. The "gym-rats" are an example.
    Like you, I have both sides,masculinity & feminine. I except that & what others think about you is not your business
    .❤❤. My own brother is
    2 years younger than me & he is homophobic. We do not talk since my dad passed 5 yrs.ago.
    So it is very sad. Forgiveness is hard. So I keep focused & centered. I trust love because judgment is just petty.
    Thanks for bringing light to this & being (for real).
    Xoxo ❤️

    • @billTO
      @billTO หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      So sorry your brother is homophobic. "Methinks the lady doth protest too much?"😮

  • @jaya.d-gauthier1644
    @jaya.d-gauthier1644 หลายเดือนก่อน +103

    Let’s be real: there’s no argument much less 2 sides of it. There are men comfortable being their authentic selves and a TON of “yassss slay kween” caricatures upset because we don’t feel the need to perform it with them. It’s not that we like “passing for straight” it’s that we like not making our orientation a CONSTANT focal point as if we have nothing outside of that. I don’t assume I “pass” I simply don’t care to wonder if everyone I meet “can tell” 🤷🏿‍♂️

    • @sleuer66
      @sleuer66 หลายเดือนก่อน +32

      Right on, I don't hide it, but I don't flaunt it

    • @glennyothers5672
      @glennyothers5672 หลายเดือนก่อน +28

      Exactly, I'm a man who is attracted to, and loves, other MEN, I'm not looking for a woman with a penis, I "act" masculine because that's who I am, I like other masculine men because that's what I'm attracted to... I don't look down on feminine men, but you can't tell me I should be attracted to them. I am who I am.

    • @antoinenvt
      @antoinenvt 14 วันที่ผ่านมา +12

      Imma have to disagree on one thing you said, perhaps I didn't understand it right but I don't think the "yass slay queen" caricatures as you've labelled them are putting on an act, some of them may, but others may just find this attitude the best way to express their true self don't you think ? I mean, I wouldn't know, I've never acted this way myself but I imagine some people don't act but are this way, and if it makes them happy, I guess it's as authentic as the will of others not to make of their sexuality their whole, right ?

    • @jaya.d-gauthier1644
      @jaya.d-gauthier1644 13 วันที่ผ่านมา +12

      @@antoinenvt I think we are in agreement actually. I don’t mean feminine attribute or mannerisms specifically, I mean the stereotypical cliche overdone tropes we’ve all seen a million times. There’s nothing wrong with leaning masculine or feminine at all, we are who we are.

    • @choblgobblrr1074
      @choblgobblrr1074 11 วันที่ผ่านมา +2

      @@glennyothers5672You just talked down on feminine men like the sentence before saying you don’t…

  • @emmettsaunders7535
    @emmettsaunders7535 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

    You're very good at this.❤

  • @DaddyBear1971
    @DaddyBear1971 หลายเดือนก่อน +19

    I think you captured the essence of this particular subject quite well. However, those who seem to be most preoccupied with this dynamic, in my opinion, seem to be those people who exist at the extremes of the masculine / feminine spectrum. As you said, their insecurities are usually what feed the flames on this topic. And the same feelings and points of debate have been flying back and forth since I first noticed it in the 70’s… unfortunately.

  • @jean-alexandre5496
    @jean-alexandre5496 16 วันที่ผ่านมา

    The most important thing is to love yourself and to be happy with who you are. What you describe here is people who are insecure, and frankly, I feel very sad for them.

  • @kayde.g
    @kayde.g 17 วันที่ผ่านมา +5

    i deeply appreciate this video you made and wholeheartedly agree. its important for people to come to terms and accept themselves and others for who they are no matter what combination of "femininity" or "masculinity" they have. we are all people with our own uniqueness and now more than ever we should be coming together and be respectful/considerate instead of trying to divide and judge each other

  • @lijreynolds9098
    @lijreynolds9098 11 วันที่ผ่านมา

    i was always think about this and confused if i’m being my true self or not

  • @pipegarmich
    @pipegarmich 9 วันที่ผ่านมา

    A great well spoken video

  • @FirstLast-ii5cp
    @FirstLast-ii5cp 11 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Great video! (It’s cool when you see younger guys have that ‘A-ha!’ moment 👍🏻) Everybody eventually realizes for themselves that as a person, they are complex individuals, and that preconceived notions & stereotypes are inadequate & one dimensional. Sexual orientation is such a small component of a whole person, & doesn’t solely define anyone 🏳‍🌈🇺🇸🏳‍🌈🇺🇸

  • @twilightofthegods3797
    @twilightofthegods3797 12 วันที่ผ่านมา

    “Greet people of earth” is 💅

  • @RobertSavage1985
    @RobertSavage1985 18 วันที่ผ่านมา +21

    I’m sorry, but you can not like a group’s personality without being insecure. I’m “masculine” and I am not attracted to feminine men and it has absolutely nothing to do with insecurity.

    • @playworld2.017
      @playworld2.017 16 วันที่ผ่านมา +4

      Thanks to say that i feel the same like we can have preferences that does not make us insecure.

    • @spook6394
      @spook6394 4 วันที่ผ่านมา +7

      But not finding someone attractive is not the same as disliking someone.

    • @chrisjackson8151
      @chrisjackson8151 3 วันที่ผ่านมา +2

      @@spook6394exactly! People are just finding ways to victimize themselves.

    • @spook6394
      @spook6394 3 วันที่ผ่านมา +2

      @@chrisjackson8151 and saying he dislikes “a group’s personality” when their only collective trait is being feminine. Like at least half of the world’s population is feminine in some way lmao.

  • @ginocarranza4072
    @ginocarranza4072 29 วันที่ผ่านมา +8

    Just be yourself. But don’t act a certain way to attract anyone or pretending to be someone else. However, respect what someone likes or is attracted to without blaming anyone for one’s own insecurities.
    On that note: Any bros in Miami?!

  • @user-dq8rt6dt1g
    @user-dq8rt6dt1g 29 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

    😂I like what you're saying it makes a lot of sense

  • @andrewgawlik4961
    @andrewgawlik4961 26 วันที่ผ่านมา +4

    I'm in the leather scene too and don't have interest in drag. I just do what I like and am attracted to what I like... I don't fit in a box of the stereotype...
    That being said, I have taken serious issue with straight people trying to set me up or assuming that I am planning on bringing a woman home. Sure on some level I might "pass", but I just find flamboyance as a turn off. I also prefer to be able to be out and open with those whom I have a relationship with... especially when it comes to polyamory.
    It's not a matter of being insecure for me, as I believe that everyone should be free to be who they are... just know that different people are attracted by different qualities. I haven't been interested in sports, but tend to be interested in videogames, fantasy, cooking, and some crafts.
    I like what I like and don't what I don't.
    I've had plenty of issues from my upbringing especially when it comes to being on the autism spectrum....
    Though, I do believe that society needs to be more accepting of people who are different.

  • @garybranigan1928
    @garybranigan1928 19 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Well thought out

  • @michaelflinn7784
    @michaelflinn7784 22 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

    Hello there, I'm watching from South Africa and this is exactly the same here. I find the animosity between the two sides confusing and at times quite offensive, even among my friendship group. We have enough to deal with from outside so let's be kind to each other.

  • @marklouis1890
    @marklouis1890 9 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

    I'm loving the cowboy hat

  • @donpM.A.D.4412
    @donpM.A.D.4412 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +8

    You speak SO much the truth!!. Enjoyed you and your heart warming ❤️. From Connecticut. Thanks! Hope to hear MORE from you.

  • @lskylarbrown
    @lskylarbrown 28 วันที่ผ่านมา +8

    What a terrific talk. Keep it up.

  • @lonelydronerfl5184
    @lonelydronerfl5184 หลายเดือนก่อน +14

    You seem well adjusted and at peace with who you are. Good for you. :)

  • @richardgreiner9264
    @richardgreiner9264 2 วันที่ผ่านมา

    “To Thine own self be true “ .

  • @JacobParker-bh1cj
    @JacobParker-bh1cj 2 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Very well spoken.

  • @ChrisMayes-od9zn
    @ChrisMayes-od9zn 28 วันที่ผ่านมา +17

    I just think that most of the time when someone has masc4masc preferences, it comes a place of very deeply ingrained lack of respect for feminine men. What I mean by disrespect is an internal lack of regard for them.
    Also really, wtf is maculine and feminine anyway? Can we just scrap the idea of gender already?

    • @charmedprince
      @charmedprince 12 วันที่ผ่านมา +4

      Dumb pov

    • @joeywild2011
      @joeywild2011 10 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

      @@charmedprinceNah he’s right.
      I think the main issues most gays have with ‘masc4masc’ is the usual disrespect it comes with, or at least what’s underlying.
      It’s fine to be masculine and only/mostly be attracted to other masculine guys, but you’ve got to think about *why* that may be. Just a preference? Sure, fine. Underlying issues with seeing feminine men as ‘lesser’ or fundamentally unattractive? That’s a problem

    • @QrowxClover
      @QrowxClover 8 วันที่ผ่านมา +7

      ​@@joeywild2011Feminine men AREN'T attractive lmao
      It's not anything having to do with prejudice. It's just how attraction works. Trying to say people aren't allowed to find things unattractive makes you no better than homophobes.

    • @joeywild2011
      @joeywild2011 7 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

      @@QrowxClover You’re aware how much attention feminine men get right? Like they’re damn popular with some men. It’s really ignorant and foolish to make a sweeping statement like “feminine men AREN’T attractive”.
      You’re part of the problem that this video is talking about, just know that

    • @joeywild2011
      @joeywild2011 6 วันที่ผ่านมา

      @@QrowxClover I don’t know why my reply to you was deleted, but I’ll say it again.
      You are part of the problem the video was talking about.
      It’s such a foolish thing to say that feminine men aren’t attractive. They get so much attention from the right people. It’s mad you’re unaware of that!

  • @jcpaintz97
    @jcpaintz97 17 วันที่ผ่านมา +5

    I would say that throughout my life, I have often felt the need to play a role and act in a certain way to protect myself. This meant hiding my true, authentic self from others. However, I came to realize that this was only causing me mental harm. As I grew older, I understood the importance of being true to myself. Coming out to my friends and family was not an easy decision, but it was the right one. I was overjoyed by their happiness and support, and I finally felt free and happy to be myself.

  • @ATREIDESDUNCAN88
    @ATREIDESDUNCAN88 27 วันที่ผ่านมา +4

    These complainers don't even matter. In the end you are all strangers. So. And the whole culture is about sex. Rarely anyone is friendly or looking for a relationship.

    • @playworld2.017
      @playworld2.017 16 วันที่ผ่านมา +3

      That one of the big problem I have with the community, I’ve seen thing when i was younger that kind of disgust me.

  • @jeffscott329
    @jeffscott329 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Each it’s own!

  • @mattschiavone3383
    @mattschiavone3383 12 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Just be who you are and be secure with yourself and not a “ label “ . Once you can achieve that , no outside source will EVER be able to take that away . If someone doesn’t like you ? That’s a them problem not yours .

  • @davidcontreres9097
    @davidcontreres9097 6 วันที่ผ่านมา

    GREAT VIDEO!!!!!!

  • @SJ-EOR
    @SJ-EOR 25 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

    You are so precious! Thank you!

  • @billybilly6574
    @billybilly6574 11 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    Jaks, you are absolutely gorgeous

  • @thewindgamer2607
    @thewindgamer2607 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +15

    Hearing you talk i notice you seem like a smart boy. I love the way you talk and express your ideas and i love that you are true to yourself. Must be nice to have a friend like that to talk with

  • @8308776
    @8308776 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +12

    If I were your age, I'd be all over a guy like you. Keep shining your beautiful light. :)

    • @tonysc7610
      @tonysc7610 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      ME TOO! Or under him.

    • @Max-hk1oc
      @Max-hk1oc 3 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

      Oh… that’s not…

  • @sunboyjim693
    @sunboyjim693 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

    Totally agree with you. Very well said. Everyone is different and we just need to accept them for who they are.

  • @olginlest3498
    @olginlest3498 20 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

    Hows the farming going

  • @andrew_victory
    @andrew_victory 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

    You said it right. I agree with you. Thank you !

  • @markbloom8042
    @markbloom8042 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +20

    I agree wholeheartedly with your comments. Society as a whole would be far better off if everyone followed your all-accepting approach. Thanks for sharing.

  • @LizzyDripping
    @LizzyDripping หลายเดือนก่อน +7

    There we have it. Broke Back 🤠