My tip: DO NOT PURSUE HIM! Let him pursue you. Retain your own independence. Don’t be too available. Let HIM do the asking. Men need to be men. Let him have all the space he needs; and carry on with your own interests. Never chase after a man. The ‘right one’ won’t run!
I wholeheartedly agree with this!! I played so hard to get with my boyfriend and made him chase me. He pursued me so hard, and now we've been dating for 4 months!
@@janetstraw191 Absolutely!! Also, I think a lot of times (not always), it comes down to women knowing their worth. I value myself highly enough that I will never chase after a guy, ESPECIALLY one who treats me like an option.
1. Be authentic & shine your light. Would the people your closest to recognize you? 2. Practice conscience vulnerability. Express your feelings in a gentle & positive way. It helps them feel safe. 3. Know your standards Nd boundaries in relationships. How you want to feel. 4. Be playful! Let your little girl play with his little boy. Challenge him, make bets. 5. Be warm, inviting and receptive. Men want to give, learn to receive. Ask questions. 6. Be in your body, not your head. Love yourself! 7. Give him space to live his life. Let him lead. 8. Give yourself space to live your best life. 9. Release attachments to outcome. Don't have any motives or expectations about relationship. Treat him like you would when out with girlfriends.
I have just started a new relationship with my new man. I have used just about all of these and just being myself at all times and have found I'm being chased by him and we're both in a very playful ways. Who knew. I love it and so does he 🤪 we're already planning our future together. We're in our 60/70's .what more fun.🥰😋🤪
I'm 63 and my guy is 65. We were together for 3 years, not living together since we both have our own homes and we live 40 min. apart. So we would see each other 2-3 times a week. But my house was becoming his refuge and he would come over collaspe, fall asleep on the couch. we broke up twice last year. Now back together again but I discussed how we needed a more give and take relationship. Things are going well, so far, he's really putting in the effort; hope it lasts, we'll see. I've gotta continue making improvements on my end too in order to make it work.
I've got this male friend that fell in love with and whea e had for play but he won't get intimate with me but he calls me babe, his woman and momma but he also talking to other women on dating sites.and he tells me they don't want to get serious with him but I do what Cavan I do?
Wow! You continue to enlighten me more and more about men, Mat. Thank you. We women really needed a brother like you when we were younger. Thank goodness we've got you now.
I love how much you encourage and appreciate the feminine energy. Breaks my heart to see how criticized femininity is currently. It's truly a beautiful thing to embrace and compliments masculinity so well. Love this!!
+:2:3:4:9:0:5:5:5:7:4:9:4:4 whatzpp him I was like this be'fore I know who can he:lp you out text him now he can solve your problem:: don't waste your time here.
I appreciate you so much, Mat. I love to hear you talk and to see you smile. I'm glad that your life's purpose intersected with my need for coaching. You're a blessing to me.
Well this is pretty good, however try go'ogling Celestine Dessike's Words of Desire for one example that never fails to get it going. Even if you were able to speak halfway like she says you should, it makes such a huge impact in bed... as long as you're also into it lol.
Amazing 8 irresistible tips Mat. You are absolutely correct and all points to reality. Well appreciated and you are a very intelligent love coach.❤️❤️❤️
This is a great topic Mat! The one you've mentioned , be playful, have fun games, it really works! Its not only fun but we became more closer and know each other well. With the question and answer games and tackled different questions, about likes, reaction to a scenario given a situation with multiple choice answer, or even sex matters, everything what comes into our mind.,no limit to ask any questions. And another one being yourself, it's true! Sometimes guys discover something that they didn't reliased it's only on you what they really desire to a woman. Perfect, topic to start a new relationship. Thanks for this video!!
Err... I've had three relationships and I've done all that you suggest in this video. And it was all natural, coming from within me as part of my personality. However, it doesn't work. It will only work if the man is ready and wanting something special.
My man thanked me for being so patient with him as he had a lot on his mind with work and his children. (From His previous marriage) He told me why he wasnt so preoccupied in his mind and apologized for not always being present. He was holding me while he said this. I hissed him and told him that it was OK and I wouldn't judge him if he opened up to me. Then I said please let me in. It's OK if you let me in... He exhaled, and i felt his whole body relax .... like a sigh of relief... He thanked me❤
❤️ JOIN MY FREE LOVE COURSE STARTING 2/21/22 - masteryofconnection.com ❤️ QUESTION OF THE DAY - What is your favorite way to get a man to drop his walls and connect deeper with you? Let us know!
I hope this makes sense but by me being as transparent and authentic with my emotions as I can be so that I can be the way-shower and hopefully give him that permission to be his true self. Does that make sense?
Make him laugh! Guys try to get girls to laugh, & I found that guys appreciate it when you're open to laughing AND want him to make him feel comfortable, free, happy, & relaxed too. You can always joke about the weirdness of living with boobs, or socially awkward things that happen in crowded elevators & now in the ghost-town elevator rides.
This is super beautiful I learn something about drawing him into you instead of you drawing into him and that made me think I would be so much easier and also you don't have to worry about worrying all about him you know when you're trying to drive them into your so
Smart! Thank You! I always appreciate your re-caps at the end, & I love the new humor toss-ins! Great help to make the world better for everyone--even for the pug-less. Thanks!
You are absolutely a blessing for us women. I would just imagine Greta Bereisaite's lesssons along with you, and it just all made sense. BOTH OF YOUR TEACHINGS GO TOGETHER. True masters of High Value Women and Men :))))
God it sounds like a shit load of hard work to help these men out😰🙃, I think I'll stay single & move on to relationship coaches for men - Us woman r A Lot Less Complicated & diverse.......👏🏻💓
u are the best. Im learning to express myself in a healthy way. All of our life ppl said women dont do this or that with men. I can feel my true kind gentle self.
+:2:3:4:9:0:5:5:5:7:4:9:4:4 whatzpp him I was like this be'fore I know who can he:lp you out text him now he can solve your problem:: don't waste your time here.
Loving your videos for the immediately actionable improvements they remind me to produce in my marriage. Thanks so much for all your hard work. These videos are so goofy and funny but the content works. I love that it's not too heady - it's not about thinking or talking about problems or issues or solution finding - or weeks of "healing process" - it's literally very action based and that lays the foundation that will help him feel safe to enjoy the heady stuff instead of being intimidated by it or overwhelmed with trying to find the words. Thank you.
What about when I’ve changed over the yrs, my desires my fantasies and what I want have changed. How do I tell him? I’m so afraid of what he will think about me. I want more adventurous maybe “kinky” sex and all we’ve ever had was boring plain sex. We’ve been married 36 yrs and I’m bored but what I want now is different and I’m not sure he will understand. Help!!!
Mat, your coaching is beautiful thank you I don't know what to call this, but i like when the one i truly love, to love me and only me. Am trying to say that deep down i can't accept any other way if he will love another except to quit from such dramas. So Mat, what do you call this, my kind of feeling?
When you weren’t investing in them, they were all over you. When you fell for them, they changed. And that’s when we come to this video and to hear that we have to be ourselves again and and that’s why women feel it only works if and when we care less. I’m listening to these tips in hope to salvage my relationship and I felt burn out in the middle thinking how at the beginning it was effortless. What do you think about the statement ‘when it’s the right one, you don’t have to even try?’ Is it another illusion? I just wonder why there are love coaches for women more than for men and will it work if we adopt men’s mentality.
Love is a verb, an action. Which means we always have to try. But it shouldn't seem like an impossible uphill battle. Some of us were raised within a dysfunctional idea of love, so we have to learn HOW to love. THAT'S hard. But actually doing the work of loving, once we understand what love IS (standards, boundaries, compatibility, healthy communication, authenticity, fun and so forth) isn't so hard. If you want to attract a man, I wouldn't suggest adopting a man's mentality. That will only clash with him. I'd say stay in your feminine frame. And if it's not working out between you two, then don't keep trying to salvage it if he's not trying. Take the lessons available to you from this relationship on how to love and be loved and eventually you will find the right one for you.
I'm so glad I found you on here. So much I didn't know about men. I've read a lot of books and even listened to a female coach for awhile. I'm so glad you put your talents to work as a couch and didn't stay an attorney. .
Mat you speak in such an engaging and easy listening voice . I make a request that if you think it’s necessary to break the grounding rapport with these sounds and acts, please have their volume lower as it’s shocking to my ears when on headphones. Please continue with your much needed, appreciated generous wise words🌠always
So your saying that men like to play games of competition with women? I never enjoyed that kind of game playing with men or women. I am definitely playful and show my goofy funny side but competition games suck to me.
aww well competition doesnt have to be hostile! its actually a very common way for the masculine to "play" so if you can adapt to it itll really benefit you in connecting with men :)
I’d like to know how to bring up a conversation of how he feels about me. We started as just f buddies but I’m falling hard for him 5 months later… and he does the sweetest things for me and surprises me with gifts, he totally gets me!
What if he's the one looking for an outcome? I like the space between us, it has actually made us both better people. He wants thing back the way they were. I guess I should explain....My X and I are trying to reconnect. A lot of water under the bridge after 33 yrs of marriage. We had lost the connection and Mat, your videos have helped me get close to him again. He keeps referring to when we'll be living together again. I like things the way they are. Seems weird to most that we are dating after such a long marriage. But It's working for us. He's happy too....just wants more.
Avg Whitegurl Thank you, somehow I try to wait to see if I am even wanting to see him after the first date. I do not want everyone to know my medical history. I was asked on the first meeting if I was well. I was honest and said yes, but I have had breast cancer. He said , I am going to keep looking. I was devastated. He was not even good looking, but we had a lot in common. Thank you for your comment. I appreciate your opinion.
@@scarlettbarsky6069 I think it's great that you are putting yourself out there. I hope you are healed and happy with the outcome. I bet we all know someone who had your experience, so I wouldn't worry too much. I hope the right guy shows up soon!
Dear Mat Thank you for this advice it is the best advice I I will use this and listen to this over and over. There is a doctor that I'm quite fond .of I'm giving him space to live his life as I am doing for myself. Won't be long before he reaches out to me
As we gave space of time ...we don't hve calls and messages in one day...and it ends more valuable and attached Inro our relationship when we're together..still he is in communication even for quite some days🤣🤣🤣🤣
Thank you Mat! The thing is, my boyfriend is a quite person. When i asked him how his day was he usually answered "im tired" 😂😂 what should i do to connect into his feeling?
None of these have worked in my current relationship. He just refuses to open up no matter what I do and its so frustrating. I can't get him to open his heart to open.
love is life, there's no love without happiness and there's no happiness without love, I want to recommend you to someone that helped me restore my broken relationship in less than 7 days..
On Marriage BY KAHLIL GIBRAN You were born together, and together you shall be forevermore. You shall be together when the white wings of death scatter your days. Ay, you shall be together even in the silent memory of God. But let there be spaces in your togetherness, And let the winds of the heavens dance between you. Love one another, but make not a bond of love: Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls. Fill each other’s cup but drink not from one cup. Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf. Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone, Even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music. Give your hearts, but not into each other’s keeping. For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts. And stand together yet not too near together: For the pillars of the temple stand apart, And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other’s shadow.
+:2:3:4:9:0:5:5:5:7:4:9:4:4 whatzpp him I was like this be'fore I know who can he:lp you out text him now he can solve your problem:: don't waste your time here.
Thanks so much Sir Mat for sharing these wonderful and inspiring relationship tips that helps boosts our self-esteem and be the best version of ourselves 🌟💯 All the best to you and your channel 🌻
How do I use these with my colleague (my manager 🙄). At work, we ladies are often in our head so we could be more practical during discussions. How do we bring up conversations to open up his emotional side?
+:2:3:4:9:0:5:5:5:7:4:9:4:4 whatzpp him I was like this be'fore I know who can he:lp you out text him now he can solve your problem:: don't waste your time here.
+:2:3:4:9:0:5:5:5:7:4:9:4:4 whatzpp him I was like this be'fore I know who can he:lp you out text him now he can solve your problem:: don't waste your time here.
You actually need to SAY out loud you need emotional support from him?? He doesn't know that??😮 geeeez!!! It's not the 1st (nor the 2nd or 3rd relationship he's had!) but yeah, in every men there's a lil boy that'll shame him if he shows signs of becoming a mature, emotionally vulnerable man sometimes.😔
Mat Shaffer it went well! Probably could improve on being more playful. I get nervous which makes me more reserved. Time will tell what energy and effort he puts into connecting again going forward. We’ll see....🤷🏻♀️
Hey, great job this sounds like it’s all based on Celestine Dessike's Words of Desire. And yes, that’s the material you need to have him resonating with erotic electricity at your will. Sounds like too much IK, but just for the basics it's worth go'ogling her ;)
Hi Mat, I hope you are surviving the horrible fires and are safe with your cute furry pals. I love listening to you. You make such good sense. I don't think there are a lot of men like you in the world. You get it!! I am older and have been through some pretty substantial relationships. Marriages and partners that wouldn't stick it out and do the right thing. I have come to the truth and realization that men either love you or they don't. It doesn't matter if you are the most wonderful fabulous, giving, honest, loving woman that has an unconditional capacity to love. It just doesn't seem to matter to a man. I do believe I am a good thing, a wife. Yes, I do. But I have to just be me. It shouldn't matter about trying to make a man love you. I just don't think it works that way. Either you work it out or you don't. A man loves you or he doesn't. I have seen women who treat a man horribly, yet he loves her and stays with her. I have seen handsome men with women that no one would look at twice. I have seen men with women that look unkempt and don't care about their bodies. I just don't understand. I want to be a good example to my daughters but I seem to not be able to attract a man that cares for me the way it is supposed to be. I am not needy, I am considered very attractive. I am independent, but not over the top, I can take care of myself, but I want a partner in my life to share good and bad times with, to laugh and play and work toward a common goal. I am forgiving and intelligent, and yes funny!! But it just doesn't work out. They just go away...
I been date this men almost 3 month.he a truck drive. I love him had good realanship.have been give him space .he really qute men dosnt talk.we both been devorices.I dont what to do with him.I.m always with him truck. He goes different state.I dont what do with my relanship with him.
I have to tell this story from many years ago. A guy in the office and I really hit if off so we started going out on Fridays after work; first to the bar on one side of the building and then dinner on the other side. I've never been much of a drinker as it doesn't sit well with my stomach and told him so many times. When we left late that night, we'd gone about a mile down the road and I said pull over, I've got to throw up. So he pulls over, goes in and gets me a soda and says 'no more alcohol for you. You're too drunk to drive home'. So instead of going back to the office to get my car which was the norm, he took me home with him and pointed to the bedroom and said 'I've decorated this room for you for just such an occasion.' I was so sick I didn't care. The girls in the office said he was gay and had he ever made a pass at me. I said none of their business what we did. Some months later, we were on an office break walking the parking lot for exercise, he stopped me and said I've got something to tell you. He said 'I'm gay, Jewish and vegetarian.' I started walking again and continued with the conversation we had been on. He stopped me again and asked if I heard what he said. I repeated, 'you're gay, Jewish and vegetarian. What do you want me to say because I like hot men, I'm Spiritual and love juicy hamburgers.' Turned around continued walking and kept talking. He stopped me again and said 'you really don't care that I'm gay, do you?' 'No, because I like you no matter what; are you breaking up with me?' Needless to say our Friday night outings continued for many years until we lost track of each other through job changes/relocations. Even when I was hit on in the bar, he took care of me. I loved him because I felt safe with him no matter what happened and that was important to me. We were there for each other many time through the years and I will never forget him.
Hi Matt Good AfterNoon From Singapore! Why Are The Guy Or A Man Seems Hard To Crack His Walls Down Regarding Intimancy Or Emotions Connections With A Woman He Surely Falling In Love's With? What Are The Ways To Be Closed To A Guy If He Wants To Talks Or He Seems He Is Shy Or Quiet? How Can A Woman Indentifies A Man When He Is Really Falling In Love's Or Secretly Staring Silently Or His Eye-Brows Raise Or He Is looking Or He Feels Vulnurable With A Talkative Woman Or Indepandant Or Quirky Or Crazy Individual Types Of Woman Has Some Standard & Boundaries In A Relationship With Any Man Or A Guy?
Thank you for all ur advice it's helped me get to get closer to my man more than I ever thought possible. It's helped him to make me his confidant and really open up to me more. Thank you so much again ur advice is very helpful.
Men crave authenticity but also femininity… my reality is that I have to be in a fair amount of masculine side as I live alone and have to support myself … my authentic self would probably attract a wimp , not a masculine king type man, which is what I want, because that brings out all my femininity which makes me feel my best peaceful self.
I am super guilty of no1 in the list which is not nice to the other person also because then I judge them on what I THINK they’re like and what type of person they will like to date “this person seems to like me but he can’t possibly like me for me, he probably likes this thing and I can change into that”. If I start to date someone and find myself toning down and not being myself I take a step back and if needed I end the relationship
Thank you for engaging with our content! If you're considering stepping back into the dating world, our 'Are You Ready to Date Again?' quiz might be just what you need to gauge your readiness. 💫 mat-nlcmdzyq.scoreapp.com/
Hi mat thanks for this video I’ve been watching someone who has a you tube channel and I really like him I feel so connected to him similar likes I know he is divorced is he protecting himself behind a camera I know what he looks like but he doesn’t know what I look like I’ve been watching him for
Sorry mat pressed the button too soon have been watching him for 2 years now I really like him and I always get positive feedback am I reading too much into it or is he solely devoted to his channel do you think curious ❤️😊
All In life we have only 3 things to compare and judge and choose selecrlt things or people or friendships or jobs countries houses etc صفات adhectives Facts عيوب disadvantages تحديات Challenges difficulties BAD💚🌏
Getting into his mind by expertly knocking down his psychological walls and making him tingle with feelings of pleasure, means you're doing it right. There are many so called "canned phrases" to make it happen, for example go’ogling something like Celestine Dessike's Words of Desire was the perfect formula for me
This explains a lot. I've always been putting walls like men. My mum didn't allow me to be vurnable up till now. I've only decided to drop my guards, I feel much better and more relaxed now
Hi there, If you're thinking about dating again, our 'Are You Ready to Date Again?' quiz can help you determine if you're ready. Give it a try! 😊 mat-nlcmdzyq.scoreapp.com/
I don’t figure on any man sharing money. Just because he may have mola & wealthy family doesn’t mean he will sure it. So that’s not most important or any top priority
I tend to agree with you about asking men about their feelings, however it’s interesting that John Grey says the opposite thing. He says to ask men about their thoughts because they don’t deal in feelings… Or something like that.
The clip at 3:39 was disturbing and sad. It’s only makeup! I may feel this way only because I have sisters and daughters but it’s enough for me to drop out of his free course.
I can believe that I wanted to see i it love for confidence and he is not prepared for that, then his one for for connecting to you too. I am at at 65 years and I met my soulmate who is 10 years and then me
→ Join my FREE live coaching love + relationship course starting next month! 👉 masteryofconnection.com/
My tip: DO NOT PURSUE HIM! Let him pursue you. Retain your own independence. Don’t be too available. Let HIM do the asking. Men need to be men. Let him have all the space he needs; and carry on with your own interests. Never chase after a man. The ‘right one’ won’t run!
Oh I agree with every word. I won't chase.
I wholeheartedly agree with this!! I played so hard to get with my boyfriend and made him chase me. He pursued me so hard, and now we've been dating for 4 months!
@@greekchick104 Good for you! What so many women don’t realize is that men love and NEED a challenge. It’s just the way they’re wired.👍
@@janetstraw191 Absolutely!! Also, I think a lot of times (not always), it comes down to women knowing their worth. I value myself highly enough that I will never chase after a guy, ESPECIALLY one who treats me like an option.
Agreeee
1. Be authentic & shine your light. Would the people your closest to recognize you?
2. Practice conscience vulnerability. Express your feelings in a gentle & positive way. It helps them feel safe.
3. Know your standards Nd boundaries in relationships. How you want to feel.
4. Be playful! Let your little girl play with his little boy. Challenge him, make bets.
5. Be warm, inviting and receptive. Men want to give, learn to receive. Ask questions.
6. Be in your body, not your head.
Love yourself!
7. Give him space to live his life. Let him lead.
8. Give yourself space to live your best life.
9. Release attachments to outcome. Don't have any motives or expectations about relationship. Treat him like you would when out with girlfriends.
Thank you for put it in order
I appreciate your opinion on this!
I have just started a new relationship with my new man. I have used just about all of these and just being myself at all times and have found I'm being chased by him and we're both in a very playful ways. Who knew. I love it and so does he 🤪 we're already planning our future together. We're in our 60/70's .what more fun.🥰😋🤪
Love this!
@Shelly Brooklyn in Naigeria? 😂😂😂🥱🥱🥱🥱so what does this doctor do? Is it a which doctor 😂😂
I'm 63 and my guy is 65. We were together for 3 years, not living together since we both have our own homes and we live 40 min. apart. So we would see each other 2-3 times a week. But my house was becoming his refuge and he would come over collaspe, fall asleep on the couch. we broke up twice last year. Now back together again but I discussed how we needed a more give and take relationship. Things are going well, so far, he's really putting in the effort; hope it lasts, we'll see. I've gotta continue making improvements on my end too in order to make it work.
I've got this male friend that fell in love with and whea e had for play but he won't get intimate with me but he calls me babe, his woman and momma but he also talking to other women on dating sites.and he tells me they don't want to get serious with him but I do what Cavan I do?
This is beautiful 🥰 congratulations- none of us are ever too old for love!
Wow! You continue to enlighten me more and more about men, Mat. Thank you. We women really needed a brother like you when we were younger. Thank goodness we've got you now.
thanks so much my dear your words touch my heart! It's my honor to support you :)
@@Mat_Shaffer We so value your wisdom and how well you share it with us. You're just amazing!
Splendid! I think that you are one of the most intelligent relationship coaches on youtube!
glad you enjoyed it!
I'll second that. Fully agreed.
I agree! Good talk.
I agree. I really need all these tips too
Agreed!
I love how much you encourage and appreciate the feminine energy. Breaks my heart to see how criticized femininity is currently. It's truly a beautiful thing to embrace and compliments masculinity so well. Love this!!
+:2:3:4:9:0:5:5:5:7:4:9:4:4 whatzpp him I was like this be'fore I know who can he:lp you out text him now he can solve your problem:: don't waste your time here.
Whstapp him
Thank you so much!
I appreciate you so much, Mat. I love to hear you talk and to see you smile. I'm glad that your life's purpose intersected with my need for coaching. You're a blessing to me.
Thank you so much!
"Men are like bread, they need space to rise." Love it! These are great tips. I need to write these all down and review, review, review! Thank-you!
Glad it was helpful!
Lol, I DID write them down! "Review review review," Indeed! 😂👍
@@Mat_Shaffer😅😅 ivy
Well this is pretty good, however try go'ogling Celestine Dessike's Words of Desire for one example that never fails to get it going. Even if you were able to speak halfway like she says you should, it makes such a huge impact in bed... as long as you're also into it lol.
Thanks I appreciate your opinion on this!
Amazing 8 irresistible tips Mat. You are absolutely correct and all points to reality. Well appreciated and you are a very intelligent love coach.❤️❤️❤️
This is a great topic Mat! The one you've mentioned , be playful, have fun games, it really works! Its not only fun but we became more closer and know each other well. With the question and answer games and tackled different questions, about likes, reaction to a scenario given a situation with multiple choice answer, or even sex matters, everything what comes into our mind.,no limit to ask any questions. And another one being yourself, it's true! Sometimes guys discover something that they didn't reliased it's only on you what they really desire to a woman. Perfect, topic to start a new relationship. Thanks for this video!!
You are so welcome angie javier! 🙏
Err... I've had three relationships and I've done all that you suggest in this video. And it was all natural, coming from within me as part of my personality. However, it doesn't work. It will only work if the man is ready and wanting something special.
I appreciate your opinion on this!
My man thanked me for being so patient with him as he had a lot on his mind with work and his children. (From His previous marriage)
He told me why he wasnt so preoccupied in his mind and apologized for not always being present. He was holding me while he said this.
I hissed him and told him that it was OK and I wouldn't judge him if he opened up to me.
Then I said please let me in. It's OK if you let me in...
He exhaled, and i felt his whole body relax .... like a sigh of relief...
He thanked me❤
Thanks for sharing!
How do you deal with a man whose wife died? I don't know if I'm doing it as well as her?
Supporting someone after they've lost their spouse is tough. Just be there for them, listen, and show you care.
I appreciate everything you say as wise reminders. Kind of like Charlie's Angels... I hear it like Angels...here's your assignment...
Love it! Of course w working from home the only men I talk to are my son and the geriatric maintenance man... but I’ll be ready! 😊
Haha you got this!!
❤️ JOIN MY FREE LOVE COURSE STARTING 2/21/22 - masteryofconnection.com ❤️
QUESTION OF THE DAY - What is your favorite way to get a man to drop his walls and connect deeper with you? Let us know!
Demonstrating acceptance when he shares his truths.
I hope this makes sense but by me being as transparent and authentic with my emotions as I can be so that I can be the way-shower and hopefully give him that permission to be his true self. Does that make sense?
Make him laugh! Guys try to get girls to laugh, & I found that guys appreciate it when you're open to laughing AND want him to make him feel comfortable, free, happy, & relaxed too.
You can always joke about the weirdness of living with boobs, or socially awkward things that happen in crowded elevators & now in the ghost-town elevator rides.
Several things come to mind.. When he makes me laugh ,
Leans in closer to me and smiles😊
@@AtomicSonicHalos YES great one!!! laughter is SO ATTRACTIVE
This is super beautiful I learn something about drawing him into you instead of you drawing into him and that made me think I would be so much easier and also you don't have to worry about worrying all about him you know when you're trying to drive them into your so
I'm so glad!
Smart! Thank You! I always appreciate your re-caps at the end, & I love the new humor toss-ins! Great help to make the world better for everyone--even for the pug-less. Thanks!
love this feedback so glad you enjoy the new format, it's a lot of fun to record this way :):):)
You are absolutely a blessing for us women. I would just imagine Greta Bereisaite's lesssons along with you, and it just all made sense. BOTH OF YOUR TEACHINGS GO TOGETHER.
True masters of High Value Women and Men :))))
Wow, thank you!
I really appreciate the definitions of standards and boundaries described in this video, as well as how they play out within the relationship dynamic.
absolutely so glad that resonated with you :)
@@Mat_Shaffer 😇😇😇😇😇🙌
Great tips! I am being myself in front my best guy friend. He is getting closer to me. It makes me happy.😁 I have using lots of your advice. Thanks!
aw so glad to hear that@ keep us posted on how it goes
@@Mat_Shaffer I will do so.
Very enlightening!
Thank you, Mat! I’m learning all this to practice in the future 😄
Fantastic so glad to hear that 🤗🤗
God it sounds like a shit load of hard work to help these men out😰🙃, I think I'll stay single & move on to relationship coaches for men - Us woman r A Lot Less Complicated & diverse.......👏🏻💓
Relationship is difficult
I appreciate your opinion on this!
u are the best. Im learning to express myself in a healthy way. All of our life ppl said women dont do this or that with men. I can feel my true kind gentle self.
+:2:3:4:9:0:5:5:5:7:4:9:4:4 whatzpp him I was like this be'fore I know who can he:lp you out text him now he can solve your problem:: don't waste your time here.
Whstapp him
Interesting perspective, thanks so much! :)
Loving your videos for the immediately actionable improvements they remind me to produce in my marriage. Thanks so much for all your hard work.
These videos are so goofy and funny but the content works.
I love that it's not too heady - it's not about thinking or talking about problems or issues or solution finding - or weeks of "healing process" - it's literally very action based and that lays the foundation that will help him feel safe to enjoy the heady stuff instead of being intimidated by it or overwhelmed with trying to find the words.
Thank you.
You are so welcome!
What about when I’ve changed over the yrs, my desires my fantasies and what I want have changed. How do I tell him? I’m so afraid of what he will think about me. I want more adventurous maybe “kinky” sex and all we’ve ever had was boring plain sex. We’ve been married 36 yrs and I’m bored but what I want now is different and I’m not sure he will understand. Help!!!
It’s 100% possible to heal and create something new
Hi Mat!!! Hope all is well! Thanks for this video!🙌🏽
everything is wonderful my dear! :) How are YOU?
Can you give a video for couples that have been married for many yrs but are having serious sexual problems???
Great tips!
Mat, your coaching is beautiful thank you
I don't know what to call this, but i like when the one i truly love, to love me and only me.
Am trying to say that deep down i can't accept any other way if he will love another except to quit from such dramas.
So Mat, what do you call this, my kind of feeling?
What a wonderful dating and relationship coach you are. I appreciate these videos!
I appreciate that!
When you weren’t investing in them, they were all over you. When you fell for them, they changed. And that’s when we come to this video and to hear that we have to be ourselves again and and that’s why women feel it only works if and when we care less. I’m listening to these tips in hope to salvage my relationship and I felt burn out in the middle thinking how at the beginning it was effortless. What do you think about the statement ‘when it’s the right one, you don’t have to even try?’ Is it another illusion? I just wonder why there are love coaches for women more than for men and will it work if we adopt men’s mentality.
Love is a verb, an action. Which means we always have to try. But it shouldn't seem like an impossible uphill battle. Some of us were raised within a dysfunctional idea of love, so we have to learn HOW to love. THAT'S hard. But actually doing the work of loving, once we understand what love IS (standards, boundaries, compatibility, healthy communication, authenticity, fun and so forth) isn't so hard.
If you want to attract a man, I wouldn't suggest adopting a man's mentality. That will only clash with him. I'd say stay in your feminine frame. And if it's not working out between you two, then don't keep trying to salvage it if he's not trying. Take the lessons available to you from this relationship on how to love and be loved and eventually you will find the right one for you.
Thanks so much for your feedback!
I'm so glad I found you on here. So much I didn't know about men. I've read a lot of books and even listened to a female coach for awhile. I'm so glad you put your talents to work as a couch and didn't stay an attorney.
.
Hey. Brenda
Your kind words touch my heart
Mat you speak in such an engaging and easy listening voice . I make a request that if you think it’s necessary to break the grounding rapport with these sounds and acts, please have their volume lower as it’s shocking to my ears when on headphones. Please continue with your much needed, appreciated generous wise words🌠always
Wide Awake thanks for the feedback I really appreciate it!! I’ll pass that along to my editor 🤗🙏✨
So your saying that men like to play games of competition with women? I never enjoyed that kind of game playing with men or women. I am definitely playful and show my goofy funny side but competition games suck to me.
aww well competition doesnt have to be hostile! its actually a very common way for the masculine to "play" so if you can adapt to it itll really benefit you in connecting with men :)
I’d like to know how to bring up a conversation of how he feels about me. We started as just f buddies but I’m falling hard for him 5 months later… and he does the sweetest things for me and surprises me with gifts, he totally gets me!
I’m glad to hear everything worked out well. ❤❤❤
This was an excellent presentation
Thanks Matt!
What if he's the one looking for an outcome? I like the space between us, it has actually made us both better people. He wants thing back the way they were. I guess I should explain....My X and I are trying to reconnect. A lot of water under the bridge after 33 yrs of marriage. We had lost the connection and Mat, your videos have helped me get close to him again. He keeps referring to when we'll be living together again. I like things the way they are. Seems weird to most that we are dating after such a long marriage. But It's working for us. He's happy too....just wants more.
Can’t guys get over their dads saying that no crying???? Do i look like his dad???
Are you single? I think I like you already lol 🙂
Aww thanks! ;)
When do you tell a man you have had breast cancer? How many dates?
I would say bring it up right away. If he can't handle it you would want to know that asap.
Avg Whitegurl
Thank you, somehow I try to wait to see if I am even wanting to see him after the first date.
I do not want everyone to know my medical history.
I was asked on the first meeting if I was well. I was honest and said yes, but I have had breast cancer. He said , I am going to keep looking.
I was devastated.
He was not even good looking, but we had a lot in common.
Thank you for your comment. I appreciate your opinion.
@@scarlettbarsky6069 I think it's great that you are putting yourself out there. I hope you are healed and happy with the outcome. I bet we all know someone who had your experience, so I wouldn't worry too much. I hope the right guy shows up soon!
Avg Whitegurl me too🙏🏻
Thank you
You are SO spot on and your SKITS are hilarious.
Thanks so much Nicole Lawrence! 🙏❤️
Dear Mat
Thank you for this advice it is the best advice I I will use this and listen to this over and over. There is a doctor that I'm quite fond .of I'm giving him space to live his life as I am doing for myself. Won't be long before he reaches out to me
Thanks for your kind words! Best of lucky with your doctor 🤗🤗🤗
As we gave space of time ...we don't hve calls and messages in one day...and it ends more valuable and attached Inro our relationship when we're together..still he is in communication even for quite some days🤣🤣🤣🤣
I appreciate your opinion on this!
I’m so happy you quoted Khalil Gibran! This is beautiful. Thank you for sharing this with us.
Glad you enjoyed it!
Thank you Mat! The thing is, my boyfriend is a quite person. When i asked him how his day was he usually answered "im tired" 😂😂 what should i do to connect into his feeling?
Give him a compliment about being a hardworker ☺
None of these have worked in my current relationship. He just refuses to open up no matter what I do and its so frustrating. I can't get him to open his heart to open.
You have to move on... It sucks I know, I have not found any stable men either.
Men are complicated.they dont open up easily.they ecpect us to understand them but they dont want to understand us.
In a new relationship he really doesn't like talking about his feelings how the 9 thing he said I've done we are close so what else can I do
I appreciate your opinion on this!
The example under authenticity of the girl putting make up on was not a good example it seemed like her mom was like abusing her
I appreciate your opinion on this!
You are so great at what you do. I realized after watching a few of your videos that my man is very much into me. Thank you!
so sweet thanks for sharing! it's a great connection :)
I really appreciate, your video, love Light and LOVE to your channel. First time to watch it. I just subscribe😇🙏
love is life, there's no love without happiness and there's no happiness without love, I want to recommend you to someone that helped me restore my broken relationship in less than 7 days..
Text on whatapp and appreciate later..
+ 2 3 4 9 0 2 2 9 5 0 8 0 8 😍
Thank you so much!
.M___Good Day___Thank you for the reviews at the end of your videos. This allows me to recheck notes
I appreciate that!
How to challenge him if is in LDR?
On Marriage
BY KAHLIL GIBRAN
You were born together, and together you shall be forevermore. You shall be together when the white wings of death scatter your days.
Ay, you shall be together even in the silent memory of God.
But let there be spaces in your togetherness,
And let the winds of the heavens dance between you. Love one another, but make not a bond of love:
Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.
Fill each other’s cup but drink not from one cup. Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf.
Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone, Even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music.
Give your hearts, but not into each other’s keeping.
For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts.
And stand together yet not too near together:
For the pillars of the temple stand apart, And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other’s shadow.
+:2:3:4:9:0:5:5:5:7:4:9:4:4 whatzpp him I was like this be'fore I know who can he:lp you out text him now he can solve your problem:: don't waste your time here.
Whstapp him
Thanks so much for your feedback!
Thanks so much Sir Mat for sharing these wonderful and inspiring relationship tips that helps boosts our self-esteem and be the best version of ourselves 🌟💯 All the best to you and your channel 🌻
My pleasure! 🙏
Thank you Mat! Your insight is helping me a lot!
How do I use these with my colleague (my manager 🙄). At work, we ladies are often in our head so we could be more practical during discussions. How do we bring up conversations to open up his emotional side?
+:2:3:4:9:0:5:5:5:7:4:9:4:4 whatzpp him I was like this be'fore I know who can he:lp you out text him now he can solve your problem:: don't waste your time here.
Whstapp him
Thanks for the 9 tips you shared, i love it👍😊❤️
so glad you enjoyed it my dear! :)
Mat Shaffer Actually I enjoyed all your topics...i love the way you interact on us...by means of your eyes 👍😊😍
You are so patient and authentic. Thank you so much. I really love this man and I want to create a wonderful relationship between us.❤
+:2:3:4:9:0:5:5:5:7:4:9:4:4 whatzpp him I was like this be'fore I know who can he:lp you out text him now he can solve your problem:: don't waste your time here.
Whstapp him
Wow! I’m so happy for you my dear!
You actually need to SAY out loud you need emotional support from him?? He doesn't know that??😮 geeeez!!! It's not the 1st (nor the 2nd or 3rd relationship he's had!) but yeah, in every men there's a lil boy that'll shame him if he shows signs of becoming a mature, emotionally vulnerable man sometimes.😔
Thank you for your honest feedback. It’s important to hear different perspectives, and I appreciate you sharing yours.
I have a date tonight and it was perfect timing to hear this. Thank you! I’ll probably listen to it one more time before tonight.😂
HAHA awesome!! Let us know how it goes, good luck!
Mat Shaffer it went well! Probably could improve on being more playful. I get nervous which makes me more reserved. Time will tell what energy and effort he puts into connecting again going forward. We’ll see....🤷🏻♀️
Update?
Hey, great job this sounds like it’s all based on Celestine Dessike's Words of Desire. And yes, that’s the material you need to have him resonating with erotic electricity at your will. Sounds like too much IK, but just for the basics it's worth go'ogling her ;)
Thanks for sharing! ❤
Hi Mat, I hope you are surviving the horrible fires and are safe with your cute furry pals. I love listening to you. You make such good sense. I don't think there are a lot of men like you in the world. You get it!!
I am older and have been through some pretty substantial relationships. Marriages and partners that wouldn't stick it out and do the right thing. I have come to the truth and realization that men either love you or they don't. It doesn't matter if you are the most wonderful fabulous, giving, honest, loving woman that has an unconditional capacity to love. It just doesn't seem to matter to a man. I do believe I am a good thing, a wife. Yes, I do. But I have to just be me. It shouldn't matter about trying to make a man love you. I just don't think it works that way. Either you work it out or you don't. A man loves you or he doesn't. I have seen women who treat a man horribly, yet he loves her and stays with her. I have seen handsome men with women that no one would look at twice. I have seen men with women that look unkempt and don't care about their bodies. I just don't understand. I want to be a good example to my daughters but I seem to not be able to attract a man that cares for me the way it is supposed to be. I am not needy, I am considered very attractive. I am independent, but not over the top, I can take care of myself, but I want a partner in my life to share good and bad times with, to laugh and play and work toward a common goal. I am forgiving and intelligent, and yes funny!! But it just doesn't work out. They just go away...
Awww I feel your pain. Me too. It would've good if Matt could reply to your comments as it would help others like us.
I been date this men almost 3 month.he a truck drive. I love him had good realanship.have been give him space .he really qute men dosnt talk.we both been devorices.I dont what to do with him.I.m always with him truck. He goes different state.I dont what do with my relanship with him.
Challenge me at Mariokart? Oh you're going DOWN!🤣😈😋
Uhoh it’s game on! ;)
Men are so complicated including me. 🤮🤮🤮 i hate that complication.
Be the change you want to see then
Don't bother. You're wasting your time. Men today have too many options available. You're forgotten within the day..
Thank you for your honest feedback. It’s important to hear different perspectives, and I appreciate you sharing yours.
I have to tell this story from many years ago. A guy in the office and I really hit if off so we started going out on Fridays after work; first to the bar on one side of the building and then dinner on the other side. I've never been much of a drinker as it doesn't sit well with my stomach and told him so many times. When we left late that night, we'd gone about a mile down the road and I said pull over, I've got to throw up. So he pulls over, goes in and gets me a soda and says 'no more alcohol for you. You're too drunk to drive home'. So instead of going back to the office to get my car which was the norm, he took me home with him and pointed to the bedroom and said 'I've decorated this room for you for just such an occasion.' I was so sick I didn't care.
The girls in the office said he was gay and had he ever made a pass at me. I said none of their business what we did. Some months later, we were on an office break walking the parking lot for exercise, he stopped me and said I've got something to tell you. He said 'I'm gay, Jewish and vegetarian.' I started walking again and continued with the conversation we had been on. He stopped me again and asked if I heard what he said. I repeated, 'you're gay, Jewish and vegetarian. What do you want me to say because I like hot men, I'm Spiritual and love juicy hamburgers.' Turned around continued walking and kept talking. He stopped me again and said 'you really don't care that I'm gay, do you?' 'No, because I like you no matter what; are you breaking up with me?' Needless to say our Friday night outings continued for many years until we lost track of each other through job changes/relocations.
Even when I was hit on in the bar, he took care of me. I loved him because I felt safe with him no matter what happened and that was important to me. We were there for each other many time through the years and I will never forget him.
Thanks for sharing!
Hi Matt Good AfterNoon From Singapore! Why Are The Guy Or A Man Seems Hard To Crack His Walls Down Regarding Intimancy Or Emotions Connections With A Woman He Surely Falling In Love's With? What Are The Ways To Be Closed To A Guy If He Wants To Talks Or He Seems He Is Shy Or Quiet? How Can A Woman Indentifies A Man When He Is Really Falling In Love's Or Secretly Staring Silently Or His Eye-Brows Raise Or He Is looking Or He Feels Vulnurable With A Talkative Woman Or Indepandant Or Quirky Or Crazy Individual Types Of Woman Has Some Standard & Boundaries In A Relationship With Any Man Or A Guy?
This guy is awesome he's always on point great stuff
Many thanks!
Thank you for all ur advice it's helped me get to get closer to my man more than I ever thought possible. It's helped him to make me his confidant and really open up to me more. Thank you so much again ur advice is very helpful.
You’re making my heart smile with your kind words! Keep being amazing. 💖
Men crave authenticity but also femininity… my reality is that I have to be in a fair amount of masculine side as I live alone and have to support myself … my authentic self would probably attract a wimp , not a masculine king type man, which is what I want, because that brings out all my femininity which makes me feel my best peaceful self.
Thanks for sharing!
I am super guilty of no1 in the list which is not nice to the other person also because then I judge them on what I THINK they’re like and what type of person they will like to date “this person seems to like me but he can’t possibly like me for me, he probably likes this thing and I can change into that”. If I start to date someone and find myself toning down and not being myself I take a step back and if needed I end the relationship
Thanks for sharing!
This was SOOO helpful! Thank you so much for this. I have work to do!
Youre welcome! Glad it was helpful!
I love this, thanks so much for your videos.
So welcome!!
This was phenomenal! Thank you so much!
Glad you like it!
What I find interesting about this situation is that everything I went through with my ex was the opposite.
Thank you for engaging with our content! If you're considering stepping back into the dating world, our 'Are You Ready to Date Again?' quiz might be just what you need to gauge your readiness. 💫 mat-nlcmdzyq.scoreapp.com/
how can you help a man heal the traumas from the past, mine has a hard time with his feelings because of how his father raised him
Don’t give up on love sister!
I love all these tips, thanks.
So glad!
This is a long distance relationship... We chat every days
That's good. 🙏❤
Never let him guess... I let tell his know how I feel about him
Yeah! Absolutely🙌
Hi mat thanks for this video I’ve been watching someone who has a you tube channel and I really like him I feel so connected to him similar likes I know he is divorced is he protecting himself behind a camera I know what he looks like but he doesn’t know what I look like I’ve been watching him for
Sorry mat pressed the button too soon have been watching him for 2 years now I really like him and I always get positive feedback am I reading too much into it or is he solely devoted to his channel do you think curious ❤️😊
so sweet thanks for sharing! it's a great connection:)
How do you keep a man engaged in a long distance relationship?
Be your best self around him .Thanks:)
All
In life we have only 3 things to compare and judge and choose selecrlt things or people or friendships or jobs countries houses etc
صفات adhectives Facts
عيوب disadvantages
تحديات Challenges difficulties BAD💚🌏
Thanks so much for your feedback!
Getting into his mind by expertly knocking down his psychological walls and making him tingle with feelings of pleasure, means you're doing it right. There are many so called "canned phrases" to make it happen, for example go’ogling something like Celestine Dessike's Words of Desire was the perfect formula for me
I hope it helps
😳
🌎WHY ON EARTH U wanna😩Make him change his mind, tbe hell he goes🙄 lots of fish in the sea shore and lakes and oceans and ponds 😋
Thanks for sharing!
Tip 1 starts at 3:22
I find out asked him what is what on your mind? He is you are on my mind.
Amazing!
This explains a lot. I've always been putting walls like men. My mum didn't allow me to be vurnable up till now.
I've only decided to drop my guards, I feel much better and more relaxed now
Very good!
🤔🙄This CORONA year really PROVED😭🤪 Shows how much we people are followers and kinda Sheep with no opinions ❤️whooops 🤪"Sorryyyy" LOVE YOU Guys All🌏
Thanks so much for your feedback!
so precious aternie turned relationship coach lucky us
AMAZING love that share!!:)
So what if you r involved with a narcissist! They tell you what and when they want!
Run!!!! Get away!!!!
I promise there are good guys out there my dear!
Be one of the boys. Easy going & fun! 😊
You got that right!
Hmmm
Thanks so much sir
Please sir what if he has a girlfriend and u want him
What will u do
Please sir i need reply
Please
Many thanks!
@@Mat_Shaffer sir pls u didn’t answer
Pls sir
Very intelligent way to help women to understands and express themselves/trueself more. ❤ Thank you this helpful way of communication with us
Glad it was helpful!
Hi there, If you're thinking about dating again, our 'Are You Ready to Date Again?' quiz can help you determine if you're ready. Give it a try! 😊 mat-nlcmdzyq.scoreapp.com/
@@Mat_Shaffer thank you very much 🥰❤
I don’t figure on any man sharing money. Just because he may have mola & wealthy family doesn’t mean he will sure it. So that’s not most important or any top priority
thats a good policy! money does not necessarily mean emotional investment
Thank you , so interesting , important and clearly explained !
Glad to hear that.
I tend to agree with you about asking men about their feelings, however it’s interesting that John Grey says the opposite thing. He says to ask men about their thoughts because they don’t deal in feelings… Or something like that.
Thanks for sharing!
The clip at 3:39 was disturbing and sad. It’s only makeup! I may feel this way only because I have sisters and daughters but it’s enough for me to drop out of his free course.
Thanks for sharing!
I just discovered your Channel and really enjoy it! You give the best advice, thank you.
Awesome, thank you!
I can believe that I wanted to see i it love for confidence and he is not prepared for that, then his one for for connecting to you too. I am at at 65 years and I met my soulmate who is 10 years and then me
Thanks for sharing!