True! Only somebody who has actually seen this, experienced this, can understand. All the time, it used to be about the dysfunctional mother and sister and never about our relationship. His dad was just like a puppet in the house and it was always presented that he is the one who is dominating in the house, but very soon, I came to know what is happening
Yes exactly mine too adores his mom! I get crazy over their relationship thats like a couples relationship. Every time we fight he calls his mami talking shit about me. Im worth nothing compare to his mom whos a God to him!!
So true! The son failed to set boundaries coz his mum always guilt trips him. So all the hatred goes to his partner, that’s me!! I’m done with them! They’re very toxic!!
Same, my ex couldnt even dare to set boundaries, just to say no, she left the house, canceled to wedding ceremony, and guilt trip him. He left me for no reason, he couldnt say it's because he can't stand against his malignant grandiose narcissist mother.
It sucks…. I don’t understand why or how a mother could set her son up for failure with his future relationships. He does anything for her and I mean to the point of walking on eggshells and then he turns around and punishes his partner instead, no matter how loving and gentle you are to him (and her!) … his mom is extremely jealous of his partner and it is sick. I wish I had realized all of this before I let him into me so internally. He was okay when we were Travelling but the second he is home all of his depression and other anger issues arise x1000 and she sucks him in so he thinks she is his whole world and needs him, but really the amount of manipulation she did and does to him is sick. Every other week she says she might be dying soon and now has another scare at the doctors. Meanwhile I watched this happen and it would always pop up if she sensed him being free or happy or doing anything for himself. And she is never sick and the results always get forgotten about mentioning. And she refuses to take care of herself and he walks on egg shells trying to please her. It is horrible seeing this because this is his mom and obviously I would never want to get in between their bond. I just could never treat my kids with this emotional manipulation. No way. It is heartbreaking because he carries so much rage inside himself but can’t ever ever ever even be himself or be in a bad mood around her. It is so sad because I want to love and hold him and I never saw this coming or how he could discard me after everything: His mother actually flashed that “mean girl” smile to me when she saw this happening. After everything I did for so long for their whole family. I come from dysfunction too.
@@PatienceWithAnimals-be6uc I can relate with what you’ve been experienced 100%. They operate in the same way. Their brains wire in a different way from normal people.
One thing he said was you are jealous of my mother because you don't adjust me like her. That words were so sick 🤢. Unnecessary fights he used to create between me and his mother. Even his mother knew how her son was but never corrected him or his behaviour but instead she said to me that he is under work pressure you need to understand him more. That's the moment i understood it's waste of time and energy to seek help from his family.
OmMG !!!! This exact thing happened to me. His father was abusive to his mother. She made him the center of her world,he worships the ground she walks on &says I'm jealous of her &the relationship he has with her. She literally acts like his first wife&I'm his second wife. She knows that he is controlling &don't agree with all his behaviour & even told me I don't deserve that treatment. However just as you said,she blamed his behaviour on "work stress", she is never accountable for the way he was raised.
Omg..he did tell me he hates his parents...I never knew but he told me he was the golden child so much so that they covered his shortcomings so like when he got 89% in finals they would put in 95% so when the competition asks they can say their son won. I felt I could appreciate this man and love his hard work but damn...I can't. All the hard work was for his own selfish needs not me or our child. They have loudly told me they hate each other other but they do have this toxic loyalty where instead of accountability they cover up.
Omg u are dead on target for my exes relationship with his mother. He is a covert narcissist, took me 5 years to figure it out,lots of drama and behind the scenes triangulation. So glad I watched ur video. I think narcissistic men are misogynistic but never understood the root cause till now. I have another overt male friend who had a terrible relationship with his mother after the death of his father when he was 12. The mother favored his other brother. It makes me realize these men will always have a deep rooted hatred for women
Yes agree, I think much of men's misogyny comes from mother issues. And in a way, women participate in misogyny because these mothers are the ones who abused and exploited their sons. It's a vicious cycle
You just described my family. Except my Mother told me to always avoid Mommy's Men. But created one, and played to it at every turn. Which harmed me and my Brother.
This is correct, before the split he became triggered about how his mom kicked him out the house for a pastor who took money from her..the incident was over 30years ago. He was abusing me thru his mom and told me a few times I remind him of her. Me and kids got far away from him. He recently went to therapy and being figured out as having a narcissistic personality
My ex husband fails to see the toxicity between him and his mom. She is his real wife (without the sex) I was just in the way. It is so unhealthy and it is emotional incest. He proclaims he has the best mom in the world and she’s phenomenal. She would literally call 7 times a day to check in and tell him what to do. I am so glad we are divorced now. All of this is so on point.
My husband runs straight to his Mom for emotional support every evening arter work before coming upstairs to our place. She waits outside for him like a dedicated wife. When he comes to me there is no connection, he asks for foodetc.& signs off for the evening. Honestly they treat me like the second wife who is used as the maid because I'm younger 😢
This is some sick shit. I went to the mom to tell her son don't want return my stuff. Instead of asking him she went into silence trying to cover for him. Its almost like a boyfriend girlfriend relationship . We were 8 years old. Now we 51. Can't imagine what his wife is going through. He made 3 sons with her. I guess so she can't walk away easy.
My brother was like my mother's boyfriend. After her death it felt like he wanted to be my bf. He was lovebombing me, then raged at me. I am nc with him and family thinks i am a jerk for not taking care of my poor little thing brother.
This is absolutely true! I lived it. His father was narc and abused his mother. he hated his father, but he thought I’d be like his mother and stay. I left within the first year of marriage. get this, the relationship with his mother was so toxic. his mother and i share the same first name. it didn’t click for me until after i left. I’m in therapy. You can LEAVE, safely!
I always try to say myself that I might just have a wrong perception to call him a narcissist, but Every Single Time I see your posts.. its like.. How are you narrating my storyyy?!! 😅 This relatable??! Your words paint snippets of my past.. though its hard revisiting them, your knowledge puts me at ease that I am not alone.. I resonate so much with your insights.. a big thanks and may God keep you infinitely blessed.
OMG YOUR RIGHT. HUS MOTHER AS A HORRIBLE PERSON. SHE EMASCLATED THE FATHER . His mother completely controlled my husband every minute. She also did exactly wht you said she took him every where . She fixated on him as a child and still dominated him as an adult. After 40 yrs he went to counseling and now he has nothing to do with her.
Every point you mentioned aligns with my husband's family situation, and I am enduring significant distress. Presently, I find myself on the brink of separation due to ongoing emotional and verbal abuse.
Story of my life😢 My mother in law and my husband are both narcissist like a couple which my father in law and I are left out 😢 and both mother and son have been controlling my marriage for years 😭😭😭😭
My mother had a golden child and lavished him with gifts and showed favouritism to him because she was similar to him in interests, now he has anger issues.
Yes, that is what he did to me. What bad things he wants to say or do to his mother he does to me his wife. I brought that up a year ago to my Covert Narc husband and he said I was right. I know I was right so then why are you still mistreating me as of I'm to blame for her bad doings? You're supposed to stop when you realize things.
The thing is , this asshole puts his mother first and foremost regardless of the damage it does to our relationship and he will go to any length to please her because she freaks out if she doesn't get her way and victimizes herself and guilt trips him and makes me the monster. I'm so sick of this..... EXHAUSTED!!
He talked about his mother often. Like he could not get her out of his head. Both parents have passed. He'd say when his mother would go into a tirade, the father slither out the garden. I'm 90 percent certain sure he was gay, or bi. I had someone who's reliable tell me he walked into a security camera computer room in the bldg we live in, and caught him in the act. You've described a narc being gay by how he performed sexually and you described him to a tee. He told me his mother institutionalize his brother, but he said he did not know why. I am in awe over how cookie cutter narcs can be. You must hear these stories all the time. Over and over again. I know I'll never ever attache to another narc again, thank God!
Thank you for posting these videos, giving me n others loads of strength. I have faced this and was in constant confusion between his family and toxic relationship, God's grace I hv come out alive and still recouping . This part sounds so enlightening now, never understood this until now I was pushed out of my home.
You just described my husband & his mother exactly! His father too was out of the picture. My husband always brags that he is his mother's favorite child out of her 4 kids.
Same exact thing, I dated the scapegoat who went back and fourth from being the scapegoat to golden child to then back to scapegoat for almost 7 years.... Sameeee exact thing he described 💯
I’m sorry but it’s also disgusting. I have never been disgusted by a living person before until I came across a narcissistic family. The closest thing I can describe this disgusting emotion is :imagine you are infront of dead and decomposing corpse on a table. You loose your appetite to eat, you don’t even want to sit at the same table. That’s how it feels. 🤮
Amén And thank you Danish. You are describing my ex boyfriend to a T. Dad was an absentee father and it almost felt like my boyfriend was the husband and the partner of his mother. She would call him crying and for problems the dad should have fixed instead of calling him. I also found it very inappropriate how she would do the prayer in front of him kneeling with her butt in the air as if she wanted to get his attention instead of praying in a different area or with her big behind in another direction. It was all so bizarre and uncomfortable
The father of my children had an absent father his mother never showed up for him or showed interest unless it was something that benefited her, she expected him to fill the role of man of the house and still does. I have a lot of sympathy for him but he's a very abusive narcissist, he has substance addiction and he feels he has mental health issues as well but he refuses to address it. I believe him when he says he wants to be a good father and have the family he didnt but i know hes incapable so our children will grow up with out a father and it breaks my heart for them i hope i can do okay and they will be okay
That’s exactly my situation. I’m disconnecting from my son because that’s not what I was aiming for in the first place. I only wanted him to succeed in life (which he isn’t doing at all) but his father doesn’t worry, care or guide him in any way but avoids even having to talk to him. I feel bad most of all that the children pay for the parents mistakes. I was too inexperienced when I first met my husband to see the red flags he exhibited. So much unhappiness and wasted life. But then again, as a child I was always made to feel unimportant and that only my brother was worth putting effort in. At least I’m waking up now, 30 years later.
The only difference i NEVER supported or covered his lies which makes him hate me even more; i still love & respect his ex wife who shall only be my daughter forever...He feels threatened of being exposed by me...i don't take or buy his lies..b4 i was fooled now no longer.
When did you figure it out? I'm only now coming to terms with this. His father is narcissistic and he took him away from me and moved cross country when he was 10 He did become my universe, he flew up often and vice versa, I was so proud of him. Broke my heart him living so far away He's a Pisces though, emotional sign, I think he's an empath who's gone dark. I'm an empath, and went dark a few times especially at his age The last few years have been tough, became codependent on him. I've since apologized to him acknowledging I shouldn't have leaned so hard on him At the same time, he should have spoke up and set boundaries
U r 100% correct; i was living hell with an alchoholic who came home only to eat & shit.Tried to mend his habits & at the same time invested my whole being into my only son; i felt better looking after him rather than his father--lived in solitude giving everything even b4 asking.& YES..he turned out a personality until these few months i learnt this word-Narsicist..am humiliated-am being ignored after having controlled my being for 11 yrs(hell is a lighter word) he left.i m to be blamed i feel bad.bless U.🙏🙏
My narcissistic husband hates his mother. Both she and i walk on eggshells around him all the time. His father was emotionally absent and he craved his dad's approval and love till he died. Over all he has no idea how relationships work and everyone in the family dislikes him.
My 1 narc brother turned all his rage against his mother towards me after her death. I turned out a super empath, brother a malignant victim narc. I am nc with him.
My experience for ten yrs! This is all True! The father was abusive and abandoned them both (he was a bastard child in their village) And there I came becoming a super simp, trying to help raise him
Dont generalize. Mothers are NOT always to blame. Its so tragic that some tend to retramatize Moms after they have suffered herendous abuse at the hands of their evil kids...some with drug addictions, alcoholism, or just flat out evil behavior.
That's different from my experience. My narcissistic parents treated their mothers with respect. Just like how they treated their friends with important social status. I think it's because my grandmothers never raised my parents so their relationships were somehow distant but my grandmothers' validation were important to my narcissistic parents. I think my grandmothers knew there was something wrong with my parents but just accepted things as they are. Just like that nice queen of England who knew everything but didn't do anything.
Omg yessss! She babied him the way he treated her was so disrespectful!!! I would tell him about his self and that will start a argument I’m like I wish I had my mother growing up and the way you treat yours is just so disgusting he laughed in my face talking about I don’t know what you’re talking about.
Yes absolutely 💯! The way the mother continues to baby the Narcissist despite being constantly disrespected by them is completely disgusting and ridiculous!
Mine and his mother dont have a relationship. Its very shallow. I dont know exactly what happened, but dad was out of the picture when he was a teen? His mother was neglectful, so hes broken. She didnt do that weird son husband thing with him.
This describes my ex and his mother to a T. The worst part is that he tried to create that same sick relationship with our daughters. Sickening!!! Thank goodness for therapy.
I think there is some misleading information in the beginning. If you have a narcissistic mother it’s a good chance she purposely kept the father out from being in your life. I know someone who didn’t find out that his father actually wanted to be apart of his life until he was 30. The truth came out and I was shocked at how many lies and smearing this women did just to keep the child from having a father. So sometimes it’s not the dad that just abandoned you sometimes it’s the mother that doesn’t let him in the child’s life.
Its so weird but when my ex and I were on no contact he played alot with one of his female friend and he later told me that women makes him feel safe. That really had such a weird feeling to it.
Before dying she already would have created the inflated ego in the mind of the son and already she would hv separated or input seeds of abuse in the mind of her son.though narcs die their plan will mnot die.they do programmings
Search about the voice they plant in your head. It's like they put Alexa in our brains...we hate it too that's why we are feeling sick when in these relations or out. We need to get this voice out..we need to love and retrain our brain.
Still controlled by his mother. My question is if the mom is dead and has been dead for some time now how does he still feel under his mom's control 🤷🏾♀️🤷🏾♀️🤷🏾♀️? I'm certain that the son has clearly already been programmed already has the grandiosity and demasculation. How does the death of his mom causes him to react as time goes on ?
@@mimikhan2505 go watch a video by; Exposing the Narcissist with Clarice. The video I just watched spoke on how to get the viice out your head. The title for that video is: " This will make a narcissist obsessed with you " while watching a video will pop up concerning your question. I hope this will give you the answers you need assistance with. Another video by Danish Bashir Entitled: Hypnosis for breaking the trauma bond and cognitive dissonance-Narc
What about a grandiose malignant narcissist mother and her scapegoat son? They always have a distant relationship and barely talking even tho they live in the same house. She keeps insulting him. She convinced him to break up with me.
My ex and his mother are twins. They have the same behaviors yet I truly believe he hates her. MIL was pregnant before marriage seventy years ago and will always tell anyone who’s in the car with her including her son why she couldn’t get a certain apartment she wanted they wouldn’t rent to a couple who had been pregnant prior to the marriage so in essence she blamed not getting the apartment on her son who she was pregnant with as if it were his fault. She tells everyone about that even her son who she turned into a narcissist like herself. The father drank and beat the mother and the sons yet that wasn’t enough for the son to think how he could change that cycle and treat his wife and family differently. Generations are ruined because of the illness of one or two people.
This is how my ex grew up and how he is. I wonder with extensive trauma therapy if the narcissist could learn new ways to handle and process emotion and develop emotionally?
Ok I'm getting freaked out. I'm recently blocked and in full emotional hell and watching every Narc video topic I can think of. In the beginning when first intimate, he told me that my nurturing, stroking his hair and caressing him, he didn't remember feeling that since his mother did it to him. He said he LOVED IT and it made him feel so safe. He said "kind of like a mother but not in a weird way." During sex, he wanted me to "hand him" my breast (in the motion of a baby being breastfed) and one time when he was drunk and we were sleeping together he said "I'm gonna try to get milk out of it." He acted like he was a baby breastfeeding. He then did it one time to the point it caused me actual pain (drunk) so I knew there was something behind it. I blew it off but I'm having flashbacks. I recall him showing me a picture of his old house and pointed to a place by the window in one of the rooms, and said "that's where my mom used to breast feed me." By this point, something wasn't setting right with me and I wondered if there was some "mommy issues" or some arousal men can get from the thought of fantasizing about his partner being his mother. So I had googled it and saw a bunch of men saying the act of simulating breastfeeding was not abnormal but it's the very reason I just searched for this video. Does anyone have any thoughts on this "breastfeeding" thing? I can't figure it out but he made me feel like I had to do this "put it in my mouth" thing every time during sex to bring him to maximum aroused. He literally made me put it in his mouth like a mother would. Am i really telling this to a bunch of freaking strangers on youtube? I'm probably never going to speak to him again and I'm crushed in spirit so I'm honestly trying to put as many pieces together as possible so I can figure out how to heal. I've also sensed he may be attracted to other men but he's already gotten furious with me when I brought it up. When i met his mother we couldn't tell him we were in a relationship because he's pending divorce from his wife who he said "hates" him. Anyway his mother's question to me the first day meeting her was "Will you be my daughter? I never had a daughter." For some reason, he loved that his mother loved me. I got closer and closer to her. She still doesn't know we were together and we'd have to wait until the divorce is final but she knows about the separation. He told her not to mention me to his soon-to-be ex because "she gets jealous." His mom agreed. She's invited me for dinner, asked what I love to eat, and i feel she's lovebombed me. Fine, because I did it back. We were like "besties". In the last week, i feel he set me up for a reverse discard and i showed zero tolerance and *way overreacted* and then regretted it but he's since blocked me. The only consoling I feel I can get is from his mom. My own mother is a Narcissist and has offered me no nurturing. My Narcs mother knows I'm very hurt and feel "i may have made a big mistake about something" but I didn't tell her what (because she doesn't know about us, or that her son is the one who did this to me.) I told her i don't want to bother her with my troubles as she has enough problems taking care of his sick father. So she and i text while he's refusing to speak to me. I've been SO TEMPTED to tell her exactly what's going on and what he's done to me but she'll hate me, I'm sure of it after reading these comments. She's strong catholic and if she finds out we've been together before the divorce is finalized legally, she will probably wreak havoc. But i can't help that i want her to know her son isn't the coming messiah. Yet again, he takes his time every week and does everything for her so she technically CAN'T turn on him. Anyway, I'm unable to tell her then what's going on but for some reason it's like I'm addicted to more talking to her because she adores me. She also told me before not knowing we love eachother, that his wife let their daughter sleep between them when she was a baby and how wrong that was. And they've had several problems but how smart she is. I always acted disinterested. She treats me like i can do no wrong and though it's only been 5 days i have no idea how I'm going to handle this if it's really over between us because he will not want me around her as I'm SURE he will fear I'll tell her how poorly he's treated me. I realize this is not a common situation but it's making a mess of me.
Yes so true. They have mommy issues. They have a love-hate relationship.
True! Only somebody who has actually seen this, experienced this, can understand. All the time, it used to be about the dysfunctional mother and sister and never about our relationship. His dad was just like a puppet in the house and it was always presented that he is the one who is dominating in the house, but very soon, I came to know what is happening
This is so true. The relationship between a mother and son can tell you so much when you pay very close attention.
They adore their sick mothers.
They can not see her flaws.
But yours!
😂😂
There pathetic😅😅😅😅
Yes exactly mine too adores his mom! I get crazy over their relationship thats like a couples relationship. Every time we fight he calls his mami talking shit about me. Im worth nothing compare to his mom whos a God to him!!
Story of my life
Facts
So true! The son failed to set boundaries coz his mum always guilt trips him. So all the hatred goes to his partner, that’s me!! I’m done with them! They’re very toxic!!
Same, my ex couldnt even dare to set boundaries, just to say no, she left the house, canceled to wedding ceremony, and guilt trip him. He left me for no reason, he couldnt say it's because he can't stand against his malignant grandiose narcissist mother.
It sucks…. I don’t understand why or how a mother could set her son up for failure with his future relationships. He does anything for her and I mean to the point of walking on eggshells and then he turns around and punishes his partner instead, no matter how loving and gentle you are to him (and her!) … his mom is extremely jealous of his partner and it is sick. I wish I had realized all of this before I let him into me so internally. He was okay when we were Travelling but the second he is home all of his depression and other anger issues arise x1000 and she sucks him in so he thinks she is his whole world and needs him, but really the amount of manipulation she did and does to him is sick. Every other week she says she might be dying soon and now has another scare at the doctors. Meanwhile I watched this happen and it would always pop up if she sensed him being free or happy or doing anything for himself. And she is never sick and the results always get forgotten about mentioning. And she refuses to take care of herself and he walks on egg shells trying to please her. It is horrible seeing this because this is his mom and obviously I would never want to get in between their bond. I just could never treat my kids with this emotional manipulation. No way. It is heartbreaking because he carries so much rage inside himself but can’t ever ever ever even be himself or be in a bad mood around her. It is so sad because I want to love and hold him and I never saw this coming or how he could discard me after everything: His mother actually flashed that “mean girl” smile to me when she saw this happening. After everything I did for so long for their whole family. I come from dysfunction too.
I'm that kind of person, what should I do to get over this
Been there
@@PatienceWithAnimals-be6uc I can relate with what you’ve been experienced 100%. They operate in the same way. Their brains wire in a different way from normal people.
I felt like you are explaining my MIL and my husband
Me too!! 🤯
Im also
Mine too!
Same here.
What are you doing to cope?
The narc I knew idolised his mother
The relationship was strange, he did take the place of her husband
One thing he said was you are jealous of my mother because you don't adjust me like her. That words were so sick 🤢. Unnecessary fights he used to create between me and his mother. Even his mother knew how her son was but never corrected him or his behaviour but instead she said to me that he is under work pressure you need to understand him more. That's the moment i understood it's waste of time and energy to seek help from his family.
OmMG !!!! This exact thing happened to me. His father was abusive to his mother. She made him the center of her world,he worships the ground she walks on &says I'm jealous of her &the relationship he has with her.
She literally acts like his first wife&I'm his second wife. She knows that he is controlling &don't agree with all his behaviour & even told me I don't deserve that treatment. However just as you said,she blamed his behaviour on "work stress", she is never accountable for the way he was raised.
You explained it perfectly. This is how a man became a narcissistic husband
Thank you in the name of all of us, Narc survivors for this free knowledge.
Omg..he did tell me he hates his parents...I never knew but he told me he was the golden child so much so that they covered his shortcomings so like when he got 89% in finals they would put in 95% so when the competition asks they can say their son won.
I felt I could appreciate this man and love his hard work but damn...I can't. All the hard work was for his own selfish needs not me or our child.
They have loudly told me they hate each other other but they do have this toxic loyalty where instead of accountability they cover up.
Mimi same here, the last line toxic loyalty cannot agree more.
Omg u are dead on target for my exes relationship with his mother. He is a covert narcissist, took me 5 years to figure it out,lots of drama and behind the scenes triangulation. So glad I watched ur video. I think narcissistic men are misogynistic but never understood the root cause till now. I have another overt male friend who had a terrible relationship with his mother after the death of his father when he was 12. The mother favored his other brother. It makes me realize these men will always have a deep rooted hatred for women
I think they are straight demon possessed
Yes agree, I think much of men's misogyny comes from mother issues. And in a way, women participate in misogyny because these mothers are the ones who abused and exploited their sons. It's a vicious cycle
Son becomes substitute husband
Yup, Son- Husbands! 😵💫
Oh my God. I have been saying this too!! My husbands mom left when he was 5 so to adapt his mom used her son like a husband role.
You just described my family.
Except my Mother told me to always avoid Mommy's Men. But created one, and played to it at every turn. Which harmed me and my Brother.
My husband's relationship with his mom exactly 💯
This is correct, before the split he became triggered about how his mom kicked him out the house for a pastor who took money from her..the incident was over 30years ago. He was abusing me thru his mom and told me a few times I remind him of her. Me and kids got far away from him. He recently went to therapy and being figured out as having a narcissistic personality
My ex husband fails to see the toxicity between him and his mom. She is his real wife (without the sex) I was just in the way. It is so unhealthy and it is emotional incest. He proclaims he has the best mom in the world and she’s phenomenal. She would literally call 7 times a day to check in and tell him what to do. I am so glad we are divorced now. All of this is so on point.
Thank you for identifying it as emotional incest, now I know exactly what to pray&fast about.
My husband runs straight to his Mom for emotional support every evening arter work before coming upstairs to our place. She waits outside for him like a dedicated wife. When he comes to me there is no connection, he asks for foodetc.& signs off for the evening. Honestly they treat me like the second wife who is used as the maid because I'm younger 😢
@@naty1012 I was the maid, too. And I was always critized for how I cleaned and told I didn’t do it like his mom. Her place was a mess.
@@naty1012 do some research on it, it will help you understand what you are dealing it. I will pray for you too. Hugs ❤️
This is some sick shit. I went to the mom to tell her son don't want return my stuff. Instead of asking him she went into silence trying to cover for him. Its almost like a boyfriend girlfriend relationship . We were 8 years old. Now we 51. Can't imagine what his wife is going through. He made 3 sons with her. I guess so she can't walk away easy.
My brother was like my mother's boyfriend. After her death it felt like he wanted to be my bf. He was lovebombing me, then raged at me. I am nc with him and family thinks i am a jerk for not taking care of my poor little thing brother.
Very very sick shit. I am so disgusted and depressed.
yes..same thing with my x.. latched to boob, told him to unlatch from your mom's boobs...
@@Richard-vq7ud wut?! for real?
@@Bufekana yes, im very creative but even I couldnt make this up
He's in love with his mother. They might as well go down to the courthouse and make it legal.
Sick isn't it, especially when the Mom competes with you
This is absolutely true! I lived it. His father was narc and abused his mother. he hated his father, but he thought I’d be like his mother and stay. I left within the first year of marriage. get this, the relationship with his mother was so toxic. his mother and i share the same first name. it didn’t click for me until after i left. I’m in therapy. You can LEAVE, safely!
I always try to say myself that I might just have a wrong perception to call him a narcissist, but Every Single Time I see your posts.. its like.. How are you narrating my storyyy?!! 😅 This relatable??! Your words paint snippets of my past.. though its hard revisiting them, your knowledge puts me at ease that I am not alone.. I resonate so much with your insights.. a big thanks and may God keep you infinitely blessed.
OMG YOUR RIGHT. HUS MOTHER AS A HORRIBLE PERSON. SHE EMASCLATED THE FATHER . His mother completely controlled my husband every minute. She also did exactly wht you said she took him every where . She fixated on him as a child and still dominated him as an adult. After 40 yrs he went to counseling and now he has nothing to do with her.
So glad he went to counselling, some of them see nothing wrong with it.
Every point you mentioned aligns with my husband's family situation, and I am enduring significant distress. Presently, I find myself on the brink of separation due to ongoing emotional and verbal abuse.
Wow this describes my past relationship word for word. Is there an elaboration video of this topic?
Check videos on prof. Sam Vaknin YT channel. He explains mommy's issues narcissist has.
100% He would launch accusations and attacks at me that were really meant for his mother
They are married. They just dont know it.😅
100%. Emotional incest. And sometimes he knows it but he won’t/cant get out of it
Story of my life😢
My mother in law and my husband are both narcissist like a couple which my father in law and I are left out 😢
and both mother and son have been controlling my marriage for years 😭😭😭😭
Sometimes the mother is married to a N and gives the baby to own parents to have more time for lover
My mother had a golden child and lavished him with gifts and showed favouritism to him because she was similar to him in interests, now he has anger issues.
SPOT ON
Yes, that is what he did to me. What bad things he wants to say or do to his mother he does to me his wife. I brought that up a year ago to my Covert Narc husband and he said I was right. I know
I was right so then why are you still mistreating me as of I'm to blame for her bad doings? You're supposed to stop when you realize things.
Wow! This explains 🤔 alot to me .thank you for sharing👍
The thing is , this asshole puts his mother first and foremost regardless of the damage it does to our relationship and he will go to any length to please her because she freaks out if she doesn't get her way and victimizes herself and guilt trips him and makes me the monster. I'm so sick of this..... EXHAUSTED!!
He talked about his mother often. Like he could not get her out of his head. Both parents have passed. He'd say when his mother would go into a tirade, the father slither out the garden. I'm 90 percent certain sure he was gay, or bi. I had someone who's reliable tell me he walked into a security camera computer room in the bldg we live in, and caught him in the act. You've described a narc being gay by how he performed sexually and you described him to a tee. He told me his mother institutionalize his brother, but he said he did not know why. I am in awe over how cookie cutter narcs can be. You must hear these stories all the time. Over and over again. I know I'll never ever attache to another narc again, thank God!
Wow! This explains so much of what I was seeing but could not understand
Wow
.this is so on point...I was in a relationship for 4 yrs with a narc..this describes him and his mom to a tee.
Thank you for posting these videos, giving me n others loads of strength. I have faced this and was in constant confusion between his family and toxic relationship, God's grace I hv come out alive and still recouping .
This part sounds so enlightening now, never understood this until now I was pushed out of my home.
Omgggg spot on about my ex fiancé and his stupid mother!
😂
Explains so much!!! 💯% facts.
I think this is why my ex put his mom on a pedestal and treated me like nothing. Thank goodness I left him.
It is making so much sense now. I have witnessed exactly the same, his mother supports his high-handedness.
Sounds very familiar to me
You just described my husband & his mother exactly! His father too was out of the picture. My husband always brags that he is his mother's favorite child out of her 4 kids.
Thank you for this concise explanation. Timely and super helpful.
sickening
What if the son is a scapegoat child???
Same exact thing, I dated the scapegoat who went back and fourth from being the scapegoat to golden child to then back to scapegoat for almost 7 years.... Sameeee exact thing he described 💯
Ungodly soul tie
The Holy Spirit revealed this to me when I was in prayer.
I would have to go into continuous fasting and prayer about this.
Life is spiritual & everything happens in the spiritual realm before the physical.
Where’s the whole video?! This is gold ❤
I’m sorry but it’s also disgusting. I have never been disgusted by a living person before until I came across a narcissistic family. The closest thing I can describe this disgusting emotion is :imagine you are infront of dead and decomposing corpse on a table. You loose your appetite to eat, you don’t even want to sit at the same table. That’s how it feels. 🤮
Amén And thank you Danish. You are describing my ex boyfriend to a T. Dad was an absentee father and it almost felt like my boyfriend was the husband and the partner of his mother. She would call him crying and for problems the dad should have fixed instead of calling him. I also found it very inappropriate how she would do the prayer in front of him kneeling with her butt in the air as if she wanted to get his attention instead of praying in a different area or with her big behind in another direction. It was all so bizarre and uncomfortable
Exactly my man and his toxic family. Just the mother controls by "repeated knowing it will fail suicide attempts" to create cycles of trauma bonds.
This is so accurate
My sicilian mother in law bribed my own lawyer! It took me 4 years to get my divorce papers!!!! Sick people!
The father of my children had an absent father his mother never showed up for him or showed interest unless it was something that benefited her, she expected him to fill the role of man of the house and still does. I have a lot of sympathy for him but he's a very abusive narcissist, he has substance addiction and he feels he has mental health issues as well but he refuses to address it. I believe him when he says he wants to be a good father and have the family he didnt but i know hes incapable so our children will grow up with out a father and it breaks my heart for them i hope i can do okay and they will be okay
This is also true of narcisstic mother and daughter
Wonderfully explained.Thank you
That’s exactly my situation. I’m disconnecting from my son because that’s not what I was aiming for in the first place. I only wanted him to succeed in life (which he isn’t doing at all) but his father doesn’t worry, care or guide him in any way but avoids even having to talk to him. I feel bad most of all that the children pay for the parents mistakes. I was too inexperienced when I first met my husband to see the red flags he exhibited. So much unhappiness and wasted life. But then again, as a child I was always made to feel unimportant and that only my brother was worth putting effort in. At least I’m waking up now, 30 years later.
Interesting! Thank you for this message. 🤔
The only difference i NEVER supported or covered his lies which makes him hate me even more; i still love & respect his ex wife who shall only be my daughter forever...He feels threatened of being exposed by me...i don't take or buy his lies..b4 i was fooled now no longer.
When did you figure it out? I'm only now coming to terms with this. His father is narcissistic and he took him away from me and moved cross country when he was 10
He did become my universe, he flew up often and vice versa, I was so proud of him. Broke my heart him living so far away
He's a Pisces though, emotional sign, I think he's an empath who's gone dark. I'm an empath, and went dark a few times especially at his age
The last few years have been tough, became codependent on him. I've since apologized to him acknowledging I shouldn't have leaned so hard on him
At the same time, he should have spoke up and set boundaries
U r 100% correct; i was living hell with an alchoholic who came home only to eat & shit.Tried to mend his habits & at the same time invested my whole being into my only son; i felt better looking after him rather than his father--lived in solitude giving everything even b4 asking.& YES..he turned out a personality until these few months i learnt this word-Narsicist..am humiliated-am being ignored after having controlled my being for 11 yrs(hell is a lighter word) he left.i m to be blamed i feel bad.bless U.🙏🙏
If mother and son both are narc then...
Oh, man. PREACH.
My narcissistic husband hates his mother. Both she and i walk on eggshells around him all the time. His father was emotionally absent and he craved his dad's approval and love till he died. Over all he has no idea how relationships work and everyone in the family dislikes him.
My 1 narc brother turned all his rage against his mother towards me after her death. I turned out a super empath, brother a malignant victim narc. I am nc with him.
Perfect summary!
The pure story of my life with the Ex covert Narcissist Husband and hìs mother....my mother in Law😭😭
Thank you
My experience for ten yrs! This is all True! The father was abusive and abandoned them both (he was a bastard child in their village)
And there I came becoming a super simp, trying to help raise him
Common with first borns.
Yep mine did this to me and always took the moms side over me
Omggggg why is this so true I’m scared
Your videos are the best
Exactly
Dont generalize. Mothers are NOT always to blame. Its so tragic that some tend to retramatize Moms after they have suffered herendous abuse at the hands of their evil kids...some with drug addictions, alcoholism, or just flat out evil behavior.
That's different from my experience. My narcissistic parents treated their mothers with respect. Just like how they treated their friends with important social status. I think it's because my grandmothers never raised my parents so their relationships were somehow distant but my grandmothers' validation were important to my narcissistic parents. I think my grandmothers knew there was something wrong with my parents but just accepted things as they are. Just like that nice queen of England who knew everything but didn't do anything.
SO True! ! !
My mother understood all this at her age of 50
YES IT IS SOOM MESS UP DODO IT HAS HAPPENED TO ME, AND I SEE IT ALL THE TIME GOD HELP US!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Oh my God! This is my story!!!
Omg yessss! She babied him the way he treated her was so disrespectful!!! I would tell him about his self and that will start a argument I’m like I wish I had my mother growing up and the way you treat yours is just so disgusting he laughed in my face talking about I don’t know what you’re talking about.
Yes absolutely 💯! The way the mother continues to baby the Narcissist despite being constantly disrespected by them is completely disgusting and ridiculous!
Mine and his mother dont have a relationship. Its very shallow. I dont know exactly what happened, but dad was out of the picture when he was a teen? His mother was neglectful, so hes broken. She didnt do that weird son husband thing with him.
This describes my ex and his mother to a T. The worst part is that he tried to create that same sick relationship with our daughters. Sickening!!! Thank goodness for therapy.
I think there is some misleading information in the beginning. If you have a narcissistic mother it’s a good chance she purposely kept the father out from being in your life. I know someone who didn’t find out that his father actually wanted to be apart of his life until he was 30. The truth came out and I was shocked at how many lies and smearing this women did just to keep the child from having a father. So sometimes it’s not the dad that just abandoned you sometimes it’s the mother that doesn’t let him in the child’s life.
Thanks Anoushka
This happens with daughters also
Will the son gets better and have healthy mind if he finally recognize and accept it?
So true my ex husband and his mom to a T
Its so weird but when my ex and I were on no contact he played alot with one of his female friend and he later told me that women makes him feel safe. That really had such a weird feeling to it.
exactly 💯 happening in my life😢
What if the mother has died ?
Good question. Please answer this question
Before dying she already would have created the inflated ego in the mind of the son and already she would hv separated or input seeds of abuse in the mind of her son.though narcs die their plan will mnot die.they do programmings
Search about the voice they plant in your head. It's like they put Alexa in our brains...we hate it too that's why we are feeling sick when in these relations or out. We need to get this voice out..we need to love and retrain our brain.
Still controlled by his mother.
My question is if the mom is dead and has been dead for some time now how does he still feel under his mom's control 🤷🏾♀️🤷🏾♀️🤷🏾♀️?
I'm certain that the son has clearly already been programmed already has the grandiosity and demasculation. How does the death of his mom causes him to react as time goes on ?
@@mimikhan2505 go watch a video by; Exposing the Narcissist with Clarice. The video I just watched spoke on how to get the viice out your head. The title for that video is: " This will make a narcissist obsessed with you " while watching a video will pop up concerning your question. I hope this will give you the answers you need assistance with.
Another video by Danish Bashir
Entitled: Hypnosis for breaking the trauma bond and cognitive dissonance-Narc
What about a grandiose malignant narcissist mother and her scapegoat son? They always have a distant relationship and barely talking even tho they live in the same house. She keeps insulting him. She convinced him to break up with me.
Very true
My ex and his mother are twins. They have the same behaviors yet I truly believe he hates her. MIL was pregnant before marriage seventy years ago and will always tell anyone who’s in the car with her including her son why she couldn’t get a certain apartment she wanted they wouldn’t rent to a couple who had been pregnant prior to the marriage so in essence she blamed not getting the apartment on her son who she was pregnant with as if it were his fault. She tells everyone about that even her son who she turned into a narcissist like herself. The father drank and beat the mother and the sons yet that wasn’t enough for the son to think how he could change that cycle and treat his wife and family differently. Generations are ruined because of the illness of one or two people.
I didnt realize my mom never liked my brother's gfs!!! Never supported them and it's kinda weird
Every word is correct! It's gross 😱
😳exactly
This is how my ex grew up and how he is. I wonder with extensive trauma therapy if the narcissist could learn new ways to handle and process emotion and develop emotionally?
Maybe but it all comes down if they are willing to make a change or not.
Ok I'm getting freaked out. I'm recently blocked and in full emotional hell and watching every Narc video topic I can think of.
In the beginning when first intimate, he told me that my nurturing, stroking his hair and caressing him, he didn't remember feeling that since his mother did it to him. He said he LOVED IT and it made him feel so safe. He said "kind of like a mother but not in a weird way." During sex, he wanted me to "hand him" my breast (in the motion of a baby being breastfed) and one time when he was drunk and we were sleeping together he said "I'm gonna try to get milk out of it." He acted like he was a baby breastfeeding. He then did it one time to the point it caused me actual pain (drunk) so I knew there was something behind it. I blew it off but I'm having flashbacks. I recall him showing me a picture of his old house and pointed to a place by the window in one of the rooms, and said "that's where my mom used to breast feed me." By this point, something wasn't setting right with me and I wondered if there was some "mommy issues" or some arousal men can get from the thought of fantasizing about his partner being his mother. So I had googled it and saw a bunch of men saying the act of simulating breastfeeding was not abnormal but it's the very reason I just searched for this video.
Does anyone have any thoughts on this "breastfeeding" thing? I can't figure it out but he made me feel like I had to do this "put it in my mouth" thing every time during sex to bring him to maximum aroused. He literally made me put it in his mouth like a mother would. Am i really telling this to a bunch of freaking strangers on youtube? I'm probably never going to speak to him again and I'm crushed in spirit so I'm honestly trying to put as many pieces together as possible so I can figure out how to heal. I've also sensed he may be attracted to other men but he's already gotten furious with me when I brought it up.
When i met his mother we couldn't tell him we were in a relationship because he's pending divorce from his wife who he said "hates" him. Anyway his mother's question to me the first day meeting her was "Will you be my daughter? I never had a daughter." For some reason, he loved that his mother loved me. I got closer and closer to her. She still doesn't know we were together and we'd have to wait until the divorce is final but she knows about the separation. He told her not to mention me to his soon-to-be ex because "she gets jealous." His mom agreed. She's invited me for dinner, asked what I love to eat, and i feel she's lovebombed me. Fine, because I did it back. We were like "besties". In the last week, i feel he set me up for a reverse discard and i showed zero tolerance and *way overreacted* and then regretted it but he's since blocked me. The only consoling I feel I can get is from his mom. My own mother is a Narcissist and has offered me no nurturing. My Narcs mother knows I'm very hurt and feel "i may have made a big mistake about something" but I didn't tell her what (because she doesn't know about us, or that her son is the one who did this to me.) I told her i don't want to bother her with my troubles as she has enough problems taking care of his sick father. So she and i text while he's refusing to speak to me. I've been SO TEMPTED to tell her exactly what's going on and what he's done to me but she'll hate me, I'm sure of it after reading these comments. She's strong catholic and if she finds out we've been together before the divorce is finalized legally, she will probably wreak havoc. But i can't help that i want her to know her son isn't the coming messiah. Yet again, he takes his time every week and does everything for her so she technically CAN'T turn on him. Anyway, I'm unable to tell her then what's going on but for some reason it's like I'm addicted to more talking to her because she adores me. She also told me before not knowing we love eachother, that his wife let their daughter sleep between them when she was a baby and how wrong that was. And they've had several problems but how smart she is. I always acted disinterested. She treats me like i can do no wrong and though it's only been 5 days i have no idea how I'm going to handle this if it's really over between us because he will not want me around her as I'm SURE he will fear I'll tell her how poorly he's treated me. I realize this is not a common situation but it's making a mess of me.
Lol 😂😂😂 sad but true!!!!
Yes my ex for sure