Some of my favourites that I can remember off the top of my head: “Did I mention that the hospital was a van?” “I’m looking at one listing that is particularly cherry, though on the contrary it might be an apple, because it is that of my eye.” “Bad.” “WHY SO SERIOUS?” *rolls lipstick up* “Damn it... shit. Uh... yeah. Went for it, didn’t get it... that’s... gonna happen. Dane Cooke even tells jokes that sometimes don’t get the laughs, it doesn’t mean shit. This feeling never gets old- Don’t take a picture, don’t tweet it. This lipstick was expensive as shit too. It wasn- yeah. This feeling sucks it’s like a total total gut check. Maybe it’s the beret, like it’s too far away from the joker, the Girl Scout outfit. What?” “I didn’t say anything” “Maybe you didn’t hear... I’m gonna give it one more shot, 3 2 1 WHY SO SERI-“ “I heard it!” “OKAY!” “This LA pool party is going swimmingly!.. Jesus Christ... You make these jokes that anyone- anyone would laugh at and he’s just such a... Why be friends with him... It’s so obvious he’s egging me on to tell more jokes... that’s the only way to interpret this otherwise why would he be such an unfunny... ass.” “Goood morni-“ “GO HOME!” “Good mor-“ “Go home and shower and change.” “Good morning, I said!” “It’s 6pm and you’re just coming in for the first time, and you’re literally dripping with cologne.” “I don’t have a menu on me, but if you have any spaghetti dish, like a pene vodka, something tomato-ey chesse-y THAT YOU CAN SHOVE UP YOUR ASS!” “I did a good job of washing it. Of washing it, I said!” “Ew no, you didn’t.” “It’s vinegar.” “Vinegar?” “It’s vinegar.” “What th- why vinegar?” “Why are you not complimenting me? Just because it’s vinegar doesn’t mean you’re not gonna compliment me.” “That’s exactly what it means. Yes.” “Blend! Blend this!” “You think I give a flaming fart what people say, man?” *shits his pants* “Oh... No... Anyhoot.” “I am ashame.”
Amir is amazing in this one. This is the equivalent to a 4th Quarter game winning touchdown drive by Tom Brady, except for comedy. He literally doesn't say a single thing right in the entire episode and it was beautiful.
I use “don’t assume, because you’ll make an ass out of ume” in my daily life and it gets a laugh 9 times out of DEN chicks love that jake and amir shit
Vaguely, vaguely, haha, no man, there's a disconnect here, haha no man, consider it dumb, we'll play it by year, there's a disconnect here, vaguely, absurd, vaguely. Bye.
it's funny watching them interact like this.Normally it's Amir doing something stupid and Jake chastising him about it and commenting sarcastically and Amir just taking it, but it's funny when Amir argues back with him LMAO
"Uh oh, here comes... SNATCHER!" is possibly my favourite line delivery in all of Jake and Amir.
WheresWallace4883
WheresWallace4883 Did I mention sale was a goose?
You forgot Penis.
Some of my favourites that I can remember off the top of my head:
“Did I mention that the hospital was a van?”
“I’m looking at one listing that is particularly cherry, though on the contrary it might be an apple, because it is that of my eye.” “Bad.”
“WHY SO SERIOUS?” *rolls lipstick up* “Damn it... shit. Uh... yeah. Went for it, didn’t get it... that’s... gonna happen. Dane Cooke even tells jokes that sometimes don’t get the laughs, it doesn’t mean shit. This feeling never gets old- Don’t take a picture, don’t tweet it. This lipstick was expensive as shit too. It wasn- yeah. This feeling sucks it’s like a total total gut check. Maybe it’s the beret, like it’s too far away from the joker, the Girl Scout outfit. What?” “I didn’t say anything” “Maybe you didn’t hear... I’m gonna give it one more shot, 3 2 1 WHY SO SERI-“ “I heard it!” “OKAY!”
“This LA pool party is going swimmingly!.. Jesus Christ... You make these jokes that anyone- anyone would laugh at and he’s just such a... Why be friends with him... It’s so obvious he’s egging me on to tell more jokes... that’s the only way to interpret this otherwise why would he be such an unfunny... ass.”
“Goood morni-“ “GO HOME!” “Good mor-“ “Go home and shower and change.” “Good morning, I said!” “It’s 6pm and you’re just coming in for the first time, and you’re literally dripping with cologne.”
“I don’t have a menu on me, but if you have any spaghetti dish, like a pene vodka, something tomato-ey chesse-y THAT YOU CAN SHOVE UP YOUR ASS!”
“I did a good job of washing it. Of washing it, I said!” “Ew no, you didn’t.” “It’s vinegar.” “Vinegar?” “It’s vinegar.” “What th- why vinegar?” “Why are you not complimenting me? Just because it’s vinegar doesn’t mean you’re not gonna compliment me.” “That’s exactly what it means. Yes.”
“Blend! Blend this!”
“You think I give a flaming fart what people say, man?” *shits his pants* “Oh... No... Anyhoot.”
“I am ashame.”
if you don't believe me, ask my UNCLE
“I can only presume...”
“DON’T!”
"You don't 'consider things dumb.'"
"You consider me dumb!"
One of the smartest underappreciated lines in J&A history.
That was like a conversation between Sims.
This is such a good comment
*oblivion
vaguely
theres a disconnect here
Let's play it by year
Amir is amazing in this one. This is the equivalent to a 4th Quarter game winning touchdown drive by Tom Brady, except for comedy. He literally doesn't say a single thing right in the entire episode and it was beautiful.
Okay, so what are you, 12 EARS old??
"Uh-oh, here comes Snatcher!"
👍
👍
🦶
“He’s more a friend than a friend of a friend” I fucking lost it, don’t know why it was just so perfect
Why are you so angry about it bro? Calm down bro.
Den, Snatcher, Parm, Leron, Mickey, Amir has weird friends
+longhorns13192 traycen and bradlyn
+Sean T Sale, Traven.
+Best Braai DID I MENTION THAT SALE WAS A GOOSE
lasagna and hamburger, if you count his clients
+psolo3 he also as a friend named widely
“Don’t presume because you make a Pres out of um and e” is my new motto in life
I use “don’t assume, because you’ll make an ass out of ume” in my daily life and it gets a laugh 9 times out of DEN
chicks love that jake and amir shit
"You don't consider things dumb."
"You consider me dumb."
Possibly the smartest thing Amir has ever said.
2021 jake and amir binge gang gang gang
I can't believe I'm back here after all these years
a0Qaaaqs asdqqqq0pushy
This... This is the best one.
Alexander Hamilton it really is
Alexander Hamilton that season or year has the best ones
7 years later, can confirm the intro was right. This was the top of their game
"Remeber when..."
"Refesh my memory"
"I was about to"
"Refesh my memory"
Aw man, how ive missed jake and amir
treweg
Let me refresh your memory
This is the most absurd jake and amir there is. I love it
Not even close
even close
I like how den just vaporized into thin air after the "conversation" with amir.
as did Amir's shirt
My girlfriend and I still do the "Refresh my memory." "Out with it." "Ready?" bit from 0:50
"When I told you that last week you welled up. You welled right up like I told you your parents were dead."
"I wish."
"Wow, dark!" hahahah
0:50 - 1:16 is the funniest back and forth i've heard in a lot of their videos. Just great acting and reactions
"...Don't ask me if I'm ready!"
You can see the slightest smirk on Jake's face, showing how much he's struggling to not burst out laughing here.
Between 1:25 and 1:28 the shirt changes from saying "I've never" to "I never."
Fuck continuity
Jambix McHades theres a disconnect here
Fatymah Osamu vaguely
Consider it dumb.
They were just playing by year
I think "don't presume, because you make a pres out of ume and e" is the jake and amir line that pops up in my mind the most
This is easily one of the best ones.
I'm going to name my daughter Snatcher...
+Apathy And you can razz her about it all the time by saying, "Uh-oh, here comes Snatcher Den!"
Uh oh here comes snatcher
Its been seven years, have you had a daughter yet?
@@ChristmasPterodactylupdate, had a son, named him Den. 😅
12 years later and i still want more of Den
Who else thought that this episode would be a normal conversation.
Just back for my regular re-watch. This episode alone has altered my vocabulary beyond repair.
"there's a disconnect here" is in my daily rotation
LOL love jake & amir
Holy shit it’s Stone Mountain 64!!
Stone, before zone, what a blessing
Yeah I loved Jake and Amir too, but then they found out about my dad's pyramid scheme and we had to freakin move!
Ancient comment
The execution and editing of this vid is phenomenal!
"I can only presume-"
"DON'T!"
You make a pres of um and e. LMAO!
I say “there’s a disconnect here” anytime a conversation is going oddly
Vaguely, vaguely, haha, no man, there's a disconnect here, haha no man, consider it dumb, we'll play it by year, there's a disconnect here, vaguely, absurd, vaguely. Bye.
I still use “make a pres out of um and e” in my daily lifw
I honestly don't know why I expected this to be a video of Jake and Amir actually having a normal conversation.
Den is played by dan
The basketball phone man
This is an absurdly brilliant video! Must've seen it a thousand times, still impressive!
"Here comes snatcher!"
It is amazing that Amir called this as their best sketch in the intro when it is easily up there.
This has the highest concentration of their sense of humor out of all the episodes
2:20 My favourite all time Jake and Amir moment
the both "what?" always gets me
I lost it when they said "what??" at the same time
"You are 12 ears old"
"What?"
"What?"
Saw the title, an I was like, yeah right, nothing is normal with Jake and Amir.
Saw the title and I was like, 'That's not possible with those two.....'
if you’re watching this in 2022 you’re official a good guy greg
The "normal conversation" reminds me of Waiting for Godot.
1:48
"I can only *PRESUME* -"
"DON'T!"
They should do an anti-joke episode where they actually do have a normal conversation. It'd have you on the edge of your seat every second... :D
This may literally be my favorite Jake and Amir sketch.
"don't presume because then you make a PRES out of you, and me"
pres out of um and e
I want outtakes of this so bad
"I presume..." "DONT!"
This made me remember that I too thought the phrase "play it by ear" was "play it by Year" for like the first 16 years of my life or so...
My name's Den!!!
Denning Isles Dan?
Ben?
Richard?
Dan?
Denning Isles
SpongeBob!
yoo all of the deleted jake and amir’s are gonna be on this channel 😳
Apparently they just got ownership of the IP from Collegehumor so I guess they're listing all of these publicly now
I was so confused, becasue I was coming for my monthly Jake and Amir binge, and I see all the comments are gone and its under IfIwereYouShow
Uh oh here comes SNATCHER!!!! I died at that lol
"Don't presume because then you make a pres out of um and e"
The writing was priceless between these 2
I think my soulmate would be someone who finds J&A as funny as I do
Same 😎
The comments section on Jake and Amir videos are clearly the best dating site/app.
@@70sman Yeah, and the gender ratio is probably just as bad.
This is one of the best J&A episodes of all time.
This has got to be the hottest Jake ever.
“Dan?” “Den” “Dan” “Den” “Ben?” “Den” “Den?” “Yes”
LMAO
I’m responsible for 50% of the views
this is my favorite episode. i want this shirt 😭
Was hoping they were actually going to have a normal conversation.
Are you saying that wasn't a normal conversation?
Consider it dumb.
Play it by year next time and it’ll seem normal
@@General12th play by what ear?
@@izzulhaziq4898 there’s a disconnect here
I heard the presume line in this before I had ever heard the actual assume line and I still say it every time someone says don't presume
best conversation ever.
DEN!
+Magalí Iglesias Barenys Vaguely?
+somerandomguy365 There's a disconnect here
+Magalí Iglesias Barenys consider it dumb
We'll play it by year
somerandomguy365 What year?
Sometimes I'm amazed Jake and Amir still make me laugh.
2:12
That's how I feel when I watch Jake and Amir.
the discourse around play it by year is honestly golden
Where can I get that shirt?
This deserves more views
Bladerunner 2049 0:04
Best Jake and Amir I've seen in awhile!
2:00 was that jared padelelicky
Holy shit... That really did look like it
Can't believe I'm here 8 years later holy shit.
Den is great at reviewing fruit.
This was 9 years ago? Jesus..Now I feel old.
Do they sell that shirt though
I thought it was adorably funny the way Den just showed up at the end! xD
Lucky breast!
You don't consider things dumbs, you consider me dumb, best line
I saw this and thought "ya, right."
This is one of my favourite things ever
2:08
Same
oh god, they finally made a video that made me laugh again.
its been too long.
ben?
Den
AirSofter241 Dann?
Den
din?
DEN
it's funny watching them interact like this.Normally it's Amir doing something stupid and Jake chastising him about it and commenting sarcastically and Amir just taking it, but it's funny when Amir argues back with him LMAO
lol everytime i watch this video i say "WHATTT?" with them
This actually might be my favorite. It really might.
"So what, youre twelve years old" Both: "What?!?!" gets me everytimes
unanimous "what" at 2:09...LOVE IT!
Snatcher
Here he comes
uh oh
I've seen this one many times but I just died at the snatcher thing for the first time...this is why I re-binge
Den is short for Dennis.
this is quite funny and weird and hilarious at the same time keep em comin dude!
Den
dan?
Ben
Here comes Snatcher!
Rupert Cornholio Gren
+James Hodson There's a disconnect here.
Den is so cute
What are you, 12 👂s old?
This is the best episode of all time.
Dan?
Samuel Barker be
Samuel Barker Vaguely?
charlesg230 consider it dumb